#which i hate doing
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Me a few months back: “Elves don’t have wings, we’re leaning more into the deer motif than the bird motif, in a large part because they are so tall their wingspan would have to be ridiculous.”
Me, a bunch of worldbuilding and plotting later: “…I think at least some of the elves might have to have wings.”
#and I’m mad about it#because the point of the wingspan size still stands#might have to just#handwave/ignore that#which i hate doing#but such a huge part of Rivendell as I’ve been building it is how remote and difficult to access it is#so far up in the mountains#you can’t really access it without flying#and then there’s the whole thing with ice coating Scott’s wings#which just doesn’t hit the same if it’s elytra#ugh#the wings are a Quenya thing the antlers are a Sindarin thing I think#(yes this means that Xornoth and Scott are descended from both)#(a lot of people are at this point in rivendells history I think)#(it just doesn’t show quite as obviously)#le sigh#here we go I guess#smajor got his wings back yippee#rain rambles#Rivendell siblings#smajor#Xornoth#marriage of state au
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okay but like why writing hard
#h e l p#i’m too verbose and the story is getting lost#i may need to delete some stuff and try again#which i hate doing#cam rambles
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writing the second chapter of my very mediocre detective AU and remembering how talented all of the other amangela fic writers are and sobbing over my keyboard
#might just abandon this fic to be honest#which i HATE doing#but i just don't think i'm vibing with it#and i have so many other ideas floating around in my head#personal
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aaagh my hip is so ouchy
wtf did I do to it
no one knows
but this hip ain't lying about the pain
#chronic pain#uhhh hurts like a bitch#probably gonna have to take painkillers when i get home#which i hate doing#🙃
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#feeling frustrated tonight#i was supposed to go do a new thing#but it’s Fucking Storming in a way that i didn’t really feel safe going out and driving around to a place i’ve never been before#so after gearing myself up for it all day i flaked#and didn’t go#which i HATE doing#i used to do it a lot in my early twenties because depression and social anxiety#and i have mostly trained myself out of it#so i feel Real Bad about it when i do give in#also i’ve had this shitty low-grade headache for several days now#pretty sure it’s weather related (see aforementioned Fucking Storm)#and i am also super not feeling the Beginner Mind space i am stuck in w/ piano rn#like i have only been doing this for… six-ish months? i am not supposed to be Good yet#but i really committed to practicing every day in the new year#and so it FEELS like i should just be able to sit down and *play* now#which spoiler: i cannot#and rationally i get it#but emotionally i am having a temper tantrum#and i’m tired and there’s always too much too do#and no one has commented on my new fic which of course feels like no one likes it#so then it’s just like well why the fuck did i even bother writing it and should i even bother writing anything else#or will no one care about that either#and yeah i’m just whining and yes i know i need some ibuprofen and some dinner probably#but like ugh#and it’s only fuckin tuesday
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How the gentle wind,
Beckons through the trees,
As autumn colours fall.
#I’ve been trying to do some more full illustrations#working on colours and environments#which is awful and I hate it#but I feel like I’m at least progressing so yknow#a win is a win#PLUS! I’ve been meaning to draw these lil dudes for FOREVER#It’s certainly the weather for it#my art#over the garden wall#otgw#wirt#otgw wirt#otgw greg
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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no writing today for the mere fact that i work tomorrow so i’m just chillin but !! i’m finally almost ready to debut his carrd / show the new and improved bio so! tomorrow/this weekend i’d like to completely finish up this blog
#ooc.#i’m proud i wrote yesterday tbh#today…is a chill day#i just needa do verses tho#which i hate doing#but..imma go play fort or something#i’ve got the weekend off so i’ll be around💪
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companions re-classed part 3 - shadowheart 🌌🌚🌝
*shadowdancer isn't a 5e rogue subclass, it's a 3.5e rogue-based prestige class, but it suits her so well and when i played 3.5e as a kid i thought it was the coolest thing ever lol so i wanted to use it
karlach 🔥 wyll ⚔️
#shadowheart#bg3#my art#*i still think it's the coolest thing ever#ngl tho i hate to speak a word against objectively the best class (rogue) it could use more weird spooky subclasses#rly the only cool supernatural one rn is phantom which i do like a whole lot but it didn't feel like a good fit for her#glad to get this done before succumbing fully to DA brain but idk what the fate of the final three will be lol#next up is lae’zel so im hoping the Do It For Her will motivate me
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Into the pit is FNAF’s own Coraline story..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf oswald#into the pit#pit bonnie#coraline#fnaf foxy#william afton#GUYS hear me out#Into the pit is just like Coraline..#from portals to another world they can only go to at night#or how a nightmare creature starts to pretend being their parents#to the ghost kids and rundown towns they hate#Oswald and Coraline have pretty similar stories#Which I think is so cool#I WANTED to draw something for this concept#so I redrew the iconic scene where Coraline is gifted the button eyes#with Oswald getting gifted the foxy suit#in suggestion the only way Oswald can stay there is by being stuffed into a suit himself#I might do more with this concept? we’ll see 🙏🏾
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#I have been treating myself all day#got my oil changed and some other mechanical things taken care of#so my car is in good shape#filled up with gas#picked up some amazing bagels#oh! went to the pool for a while#and then meditated in the hot tub#and picked up dinner for tonight (bake at home pizza)#but the biggest treat of all is that money I spend regularly#on a housekeeper#today she emptied the dishwasher#and she always folds my sheets#which I hate doing#she is worth her weight in gold#I’ve had a housekeeper for many years now#I treated myself long ago#and it’s always been worth skipping a few Starby’s drinks every month#this one?#she’s freaking amazing#anyway did I mention that now I’m reading an actual book?#I feel very decadent today
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I really like the way Giyuu thinks he can make friends with Sanemi is by just hiding red bean mochis in his sleeve and giving it to him whenever. I can just imagine Sanemi having a bad day and it gets 10 times worse when Giyuu comes around because he might think he's making fun of him
Pretty relatable tho I get it Giyuu I get it
#anyways this was just an excuse to draw demon slayer stuff#im getting a bit tired of drawing danganronpa stuff so im taking a break before it makes me hate danganronpa#sanemi shinazugawa#kny sanemi#demon slayer sanemi#shinazugawa sanemi#kny#kimetsu no yaiba#giyuu tomioka#kny giyuu#demon slayer giyuu#kimetsu giyuu#kimetsu sanemi#sanegiyuu#sure why not#which i will continue doing btw
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best friends
#valentines day#love puppy#love kitten#webkinz#digital art#id in alt text#my art#ik i said i would do raccoons again but i remembered ive been meaning to draw webkinz love puppy idk#this was mostly an excuse to experiment w brushes and textures. experiment failed i still hate them#my battle w procreate is ongoing 🔪#idk i feel like i should keep a tradition of valentines day drawings#HOPEFULLY now that school is done. maybe ill finally have the mental bandwidth to draw in october#which is way better than february 😑
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the "shave your pits" guy is back in my notes and this time is being transphobic to my followers so it's pit posting time again!!!
#I've been getting a spike in transphobic hate mail recently which I'm taking as a sign that I'm doing something right#i wonder if they're aware that their hatred only makes me more sure of myself and more confident that I'm on the right path#straight up the opposite effect of what they want me to feel lmao but like yeah#bring it on fuckers your rage is as kerosene to a forest fire#nixie pics#nixie pits#muscle mommy
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2023 darkstalker floating in space doing nothing grinning evily and scary. png 1 and 2
#theres things i dont like in here but i also dont feel like retouching them so close ur eyes and pretend i did#no memory of drawing those btw. whenever i draw this guy i do in in a daze and hes on my canvas all finished up#my wof lore is that whiteout os my fav character evar so far but#instead of drawing her my brains forcing me to draw her annoying evil brother i hate#lim serious when i say i dont like him. but hes soooo fun to draw i cant say no to worlds evilest 17 year old teenager dragon. frown#i think i made those around the time i got the book which i still didnt get to read btw. sorry. this year was craszy#ill get to it. promise#darkstalker#wof#wings of fire#art tag#eyestrain
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watching this guy play house flipper and realizing that I actually am trash at interior design lol
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