#which I think the fact that I feel like it's necessary to do so in the first place kind of proves my point.

[3584-tropical-fish]

@xenoliith thank you for asking and giving me an excuse to ramble more about this topic! Fair warning that this will probably go on several tangents

Also disclaimer that I am approaching this from a geology standpoint, as opposed to a hydrology or biology or any other standpoint, but also that all scientific fields are interconnected and to understand one you must have a grasp on all others! And also I am not yet an expert on this. We’re working on it though

Under the cut because this got. long.

Okay, so! Firstly: what classifies as a tidal river? I wasn’t actually certain on this, so I’m going to work with the definition provided by Wikipedia:

So a tidal river must be affected by the tides, and while it is not necessary for the salinity to be higher than your average freshwater river, having a higher salinity does add credence to any “tidal river” classification.

Let’s consider salinity first, because that’s something I have more of a grasp on. The average salinity of our oceans is 35ppt (parts per thousand), or 3.5%. For water to be classified as brackish (which is what you’d probably expect in a non-freshwater tidal river), the salinity must be within the 0.5-30ppt range, and anything less than that makes the body of water fresh. We know that the White Gull river — especially in its lower reaches but even further up river — hosts a variety of organisms that you’d typically see in an estuary (delta) environment, like crabs, shrimp, limpets, oysters, and barnacles, all of which are adapted for varying levels of salinity, but usually waters that fall into the brackish range. So I do think it’s safe to say that the white gull is a brackish river, perhaps not all the way to its headwaters but certainly incredibly — and unnaturally — far upstream (and, judging by this post, that’s what’s happening here. The Trawler-man and his angels are a pollutant that is increasing the salinity of the river, and making it act in ways it shouldn’t. Which I think is very important to keep in mind! As scientific as I want to be, there is still Weird Shit going on).

As for the tidal setting, I’m going to be referencing these three types:

As defined in the Wikipedia page from earlier, these different environments all have different tidal ranges (meaning: the distance between low tide and high tide, on average (since these fluctuate throughout the year)). We don’t know the measurable tidal range of the White Gull, so we’re going to have to reverse engineer that based on what we know about the environment. And, honestly? I think it’s a macrotidal environment. There is no mention of barrier islands, which may just be because no one mentioned them even if they are there, but if no one mentioned them, then I can’t prove that they exist. Macrotidal environments also result in large estuaries, wide tidal flats, and marshlands, which is fitting for the White Gull!

So what does this mean for the river as whole? How far do the tides reach upstream? Let’s consider that currently, the Chesapeake Bay’s tidal range is ~1m, meaning it has a much smaller tidal range than the white gull likely has, and making it microtidal.

Fun fact that I learned recently: the same tides that impact the Chesapeake Bay can also be seen in upstate New York. Now, those tides are nothing massive, they’re like. A millimeter. But my point is that tides affect most bodies of water, even by a little bit. And if the White Gull is macrotidal, it has ranges of >4m, which could probably reach and significantly impact a large portion of the river. How much exactly I can’t say, because I don’t know how long this river is, but I feel like it’s safe to say that they reach pretty far upriver. And considering how much they talk about the tides in the Parish? Undoubtedly this is a tidal river, even if the reason it’s a tidal river is Weird God Shit.

So to actually answer your question — I don’t think velocity matters! For one, it isn’t involved in the classification of tidal rivers, and for another, this was an outlying event; the river doesn’t usually move this fast. Which leads me into my tangential point about the discharge rate of this river!

So, I’m going to work in theoreticals, because we don’t have the data to determine the exact discharge rate (meaning: how much water passes through the river channel, in meters cubed per second) of this river. What we do know is velocity, that Q = uA (or, discharge equals flow velocity times cross-sectional area of the channel), and the continuity principle (that the discharge at the beginning of a channel must be the same as the discharge at the end (Qsub1 must equal Qsub2)

Up at the headwaters of the white gull, the river is shallow enough for Carpenter to walk in it, and is presumably not very wide. We can assume that, like most rivers, the river widens and deepens as you go downstream, and we know that eventually it widens into a delta. So, from the aquifer to the delta, there is a net increase in A. In order for Q to remain the same, that means u must decrease. This means that even though the river is moving very fast near the Grand Aquifer, by the time the floodwaters reach the lower delta and, eventually, the ocean, the velocity would have decreased significantly, depositing silt and clay all throughout the delta and overall appearing much calmer, and more easily influenced by flood tides (since, if there’s less energy pushing out into the sea, it will be easier for energy from the tides to push in and upriver).

This is true at all times, but as I said, this was a unique flooding event. Base flow (or, the discharge of the river on your typical day, when it’s not impacted by flooding) would be significantly less, and the river would overall flow much slower.

I don't really know how to conclude this, but I suppose I might as well go all in and propose my theory as to the general ecology and behavior of the White Gull River, because dear god have I thought way too much about it in order to write this. So, to start:

The White Gull starts high up in some mountainous/hilly terrain. There are likely several smaller tributaries that all lead into it, and they're all probably very small streams. Since they're in the mountains, they have steep slopes and very turbulent flows; they move fast and dredge up a lot of sediment, which they transport downstream.

When we get down into the flatlands, the river has the space to widen out and, importantly, meander. Hayward makes a joke about oxbow lakes, and I wouldn't be surprised if this was a river that had meandered enough to create a couple! This is also where Jon Ware's comment in the season 1 q&a about the Trawler-man's two mouths being a joke about cut banks and point bars comes into play: As the river meanders, it flings the water around bends, which increases the velocity and causes it to weather away more sediment. It deposits that sediment on the point bars, where the flow is slower.

Out here, the river is wide and deep, and it flows slowly. It's depositing all the sediment that it weathered away in the mountains and at the cut banks, and we're probably getting a fair amount of wetland formation as this sediment is deposited. Think early season 1, Marcel's Crossing and Roake's bungalow and the marshland Carpenter and Faulkner start in would probably all exist around this portion of the river.

At some point, we hit the Saint's Dam, which dramatically slows the flow velocity, causing a lot of sediment to be deposited behind the dam, which in the future may cause it to fail! If anyone in this universe cared enough, someone should probably be keeping an eye on that! On the other side of the dam, there's undoubtedly an increase in velocity because a lot of water is rushing through smaller apertures in the dam. This dredges up a lot more sediment, which is carried downstream, and eventually to the delta.

The delta is where all the fun stuff happens (I love estuaries so much, and this is it). The river widens out, slows down, and deposits a LOT of sand and silt and clay, which provides nutrients for the plants and animals living there. Also impacting the delta is a massive tidal range, so the marshes that are forming are dealing with a lot of saltwater incursion, sediment deposits from the ocean which are brought in by flood tides, and the expectation that there will be large swathes of land that are sometimes covered by brackish water, and sometimes not. This is the environment that the Trawler-man thrives in, this is where the crabs and the barnacles and the oysters thrive, and this is where Carpenter grew up.

From here, there's nowhere else to go but out to sea. Any sediment that wasn't yet deposited in the marshes is flung out into the ocean, where it will likely take a very long time to settle out (it's only clay by this point, and is incredibly small so would have a very long settling time). You may have some tidal flats forming at the very far end of the delta, and maybe there are plovers that live there. Maybe worms and more crabs burrowing into the earth, here accustomed to mostly saltwater.

And I think that's all I have to ramble about. I forgot that I really love river environments and the geology that leads to them and the animals that live in them, but hopefully you enjoyed my tangent :)

Not that anyone asked but looking at a.) the fact that Carpenter says that it’s clay being torn from the riverbank by the floodwaters of the White Gull and b.) The Hjulström Curve:

We can determine that the flow velocity of the White Gull River in TSV45 was approximately 150-300 cm/s.

What does this mean? Absolutely nothing, I’m going to be so honest. I just find this amusing

[suzukiblu]

Day twelve of “obligatory sugar baby Kon” behind the cut. prev: (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Tim clears his throat and adjusts the collar of his shirt for honestly no good reason, and Kon keeps doing–Kon keeps beaming at him. There is just . . . there is just so, so much beaming happening right now, and it is very, very hard to concentrate on anything else. Or even, like, passingly think about anything else. 

Kon looks–he just looks happy, and Tim feels flustered and overwhelmed and vaguely nauseous, but like, in a good way, somehow, and . . . it’s a lot. Yeah. Just–Tim is currently feeling a lot of things, is all. Just . . . a lot. So much. 

Tim wonders if he could figure out a loophole to “legally” marry Kon despite the fact he’s fifteen and Kon is only maybe legally a person and/or citizen in the eyes of the government, because in that case even once Kon gets bored of Tim Drake he’ll be able to send him alimony payments or whatever, so– 

Actually, Tim realizes as he looks at Kon’s beaming face–at Kon’s beaming face beaming at him–and feels Kon’s hand still gripping his easily and comfortably, and Kon still leaned in closer than necessary even as they walk along the sidewalk together . . . 

Actually, he doesn’t feel like Kon’s getting bored with Tim Drake at all. 

. . . . . . huh. 

Weird, Tim thinks, a little too bewildered to figure out why he feels that way. 

“Oh, hey, that looks good,” Kon says, perking up a little more as he looks at something over Tim’s shoulder and points past him with his free hand. “We need a new dinner place, right? Wanna try it?” 

Tim looks where Kon’s pointing and frowns in confusion, because he’s pointing at a skate shop, of all things, not a restaurant or cafe or even a bar. 

“I haven’t touched a skateboard in months and also I have no idea what that has to do with dinner,” he admits, still frowning in confusion, and Kon laughs. 

“The food truck, babe,” he says with a snigger, pointing more emphatically. “You skateboard?” 

“Uh–sometimes, yeah,” Tim says, refocusing his eyes to realize–yeah, there is in fact a food truck there, parked just to the side of the skate shop. It’s very . . . yellow. Very, very brightly yellow. 

He can absolutely never, ever tell Bruce he missed something as obvious as a huge neon yellow food truck, Tim swears to himself, and then he actually registers what the truck says and . . . blinks, very slowly. 

“Is that the one-dollar grilled cheese truck?” he says. “I thought that was a meme or something.” 

“I mean, probably some bargain-basement content creator who thinks they're an influencer is running it as some publicity stunt shit, but one-dollar grilled cheese,” Kon says reasonably, except for how Tim cannot even imagine what about that statement would be “reasonable”. 

“You want to get dinner from the one-dollar grilled cheese truck?” he asks, a little incredulous about the idea. 

“We could get so many, babe,” Kon says with a gleeful grin. Tim, instinctively, is about to protest that they could get “so many” of whatever Kon wanted, in fact, and a truck that says both “cash only” and “no change given, figure out your own shit” in Impact font is literally just . . . what. What? But then he has a brief remembered flash of Dick saying there wasn’t any “one size dates all” and talking to him about circus tickets and tailoring dates to the other person's tastes and, well . . . 

“Um, sure?” he says, still vaguely bewildered. Kon needs more expensive tastes. He needs to get Kon more expensive tastes. And also maybe, like, better standards for a “nice” dinner. 

Kon beams at him again, giving his hand a squeeze, and Tim disassociates for a minute or two in an attempt to process any of that and entirely, entirely fails to. 

. . . alright, maybe some of Dick’s dating advice was helpful, he reflects. 

. . . . . . also to be fair, this also might be the Condiment King or some other D-lister about to start some shit, in which case it wouldn't hurt to throw a superhero at the problem anyway. 

And at least it's gonna be a lot of calories, right?

[volitioncheck]

i think i wouldn’t hate disco elysium’s collage mode nearly as much if it weren’t for 1) the way that it was marketed in such a tasteless, soulless manner, let alone the fact that it was a last ditch distraction from a dead on its feet studio piloted by dumbass thieving execs and released on the day of the court declaration, and 2) those dumbass fucking stickers

like if it had been included with the base game from the start and had been titled something a bit more tasteful and in-line with how i would have liked the feature to be marketed as— something like “exploration mode”, something that perhaps could only be unlocked after completing the game for the first time, AND didn’t have those stupid as hell visually and tonally incongruent with the artstyle stickers, i would have applauded it as a nice little bonus for being able to study and appreciate the 3d models and environments for reference.

[waterberry-strawmelon]

just gonna go ahead and say this in advance—

if Riz does indeed come out in junior year, and he says, “I’m ace” or “I’m asexual” when referring specifically to his lack of romantic attraction, aromantic people are allowed to be upset about it.

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

[littencloud9]

//

[king-spite]

.

[softness-and-shattering]

I kind of get how it can be a trauma response, to lash out at anything that feels safe or comfortable because its unusual which makes it scary.

You're allowed to be safe though. You dont have to antagonise everyone who might be your ally to drive us away before we can hurt you. Most of us, many of us - i dont have statistics on this - dont want to hurt you and do our best to avoid it.

Womanhood is not defined by suffering. Transness is not defined by suffering. Its an aspect, sure, just as suffering is an aspect of being human. But its not the point. Its not necessary, its not the foundation stone. You dont have to cling to it. Let it go.

Idk if anyone who needs to hear this has got this far but just in case. Acting like a walking trauma reaction is hurting everyone. Its possible to heal. Dont you want to heal? Arent you exhausted? Take a tiny little chance that it might be safer than you thought and put your shit down. Or open some space and think about what it is you like about being trans, about being a woman, of holding any identity that you find painful. What draws you to it? What do you want it to look like?

Ill go first. I love my voice. When it started properly breaking my first feeling was relief. I get to sound warm and rumbly and comforting now. Is that what I like about being trans or about being a guy? Idk, both maybe. I like that I get to define things for myself outside of imposed expectations. Ok your turn. Name one thing. Start building a sense of self around joy and contentment or at the very least, not pain. Start building yourself into someone who wants to live and can enjoy living. Its always possible.

And yeah maybe Im shouting compassion into the void but I hope someone somewhere is listening, that I might influence them a tiny bit make their life a little better. If someone is plain nasty to me I wont engage.

And yes people who are so caught up in their fear and pain and making up lies where theyre the victim - on the one hand, its a defence mechanism, I get it. On the other hand, its hurtful, and its extremely rude and also ludicrous. Like who is this crowd of cis women running to transmasc's defence everywhere? Cis women are weird and entitled with us. They know they have cis privilege over us. They act like the fact we started as the same sex gives them rights to be invasive "because we're all just girls". Cis women are less privileged than cis men but theyre second on that food chain, theyre cis. And sometimes they enjoy holding power over someone else for a change.

Which is to say, if youre lashing out at everyone because youre scared, you need to get yourself under control. Youre hurting people who dont deserve it. You need help, in the most genuine of meanings. You need to be able to function healthily as part of society, and yes theres a lot of transphobes out there, but most people dont carr one way or the other. Your overwhelming fear is not of equal size to the danger, which does exist, but is not all-encompassing of everything forever.

For everyones sake including your own: life can be better. Please work towards it being better. Get your shit together and let yourself be helped.

you’ll see a trans boy be like “i dont personally have the power to oppress you” and then later the same day 3 of their little trans boy friends will start calling you out for making the first trans boy cry so hard he almost died (by disagreeing with him) and then all the cis women in the space will instantly side with the fragile little boys against the scary big [t-slur] who uses intimidating words like “transmisogyny” and thats how the whisper network against you starts, leading to far reaching professional and social consequences that never leave you

This didn’t happen.

Not this way, at least. All marginalized people are at all times at risk of being canceled unfairly. Their marginalization tends to play a major part in that, obviously. Trans women get hit with it a lot and that fucking sucks, and some transmascs are in TERF-y circles and can theoretically use that against transfems should they feel the need to.

This that I’m quoting, however, is a fantasy. It’s a page from a dream journal. People are giddily imagining things like this happening because they live in a world where trans women are feared and have their reputations ruined by lies, and they want to exploit that for their own benefit. The best way of doing this is putting themselves above other trans people, because cis people don’t give enough of a fuck to care or get involved with these bullshit arguments, but if you whine about other marganalized people they will actually be affected by it and forced into the conversation you created out of thin air. It’s not so much a victimization complex as it is a death cult fascination with the misery of transfemininity identical to the TERF obsession with fymyl suffering, defining ‘trans woman’ as 'the thing that feels pain always and forever.’

It’s disgusting and I can’t imagine identifying with such a sniveling and pathetic vision of what being a trans woman is like. It’s so undignified it makes my skin crawl. It’s embarrassing. There’s nothing in this crying little effigy covered in pins and needles I can relate to. I can’t tell if these people need more self-esteem or less. I’m so fucking tired of this wounded gazelle shit.

But for the TRF, transfemininity is all about the abuse. Just look at the beyond absurd assertion, made over and over again, that trans women are maliciously called the t-slur by other trans people. That’s just. No? No. But in claiming that the t-slur can only ever refer to trans women, and that transfeminine suffering takes priority above all else because everyone forever at all times hates trans women more than anyone else, it again becomes necessary to construct this false vision of intercommunity dynamics where “scary big t-slur” is a stereotype that exists within the community in the first place, and which trans men are constantly using against trans women.

It’s just so blatantly selfish for one to act like a transfeminist when all one does every single day is bitch about other trans people. We’re all about to get fucked harder than ever and there are people who profess to sincerely believe they’re fighting the revolution by making up lies about their siblings. I’m easily triggered by transphobia outside of the community and yet even I manage to engage with actual transphobes and make them considerably less transphobic, yet people who don’t even know enough about what TERFs believe to understand they hate men too will fritter the day away on how they could theoretically be canceled if they did something bad ,and wouldn’t that be the worst thing ever? Oh, what if I broke up with someone and our mutual friends believed I was the jerk, because that’s a situation that exclusively happens to poor helpwess twans women and the mere suggestion I could possibly be a jerk in the first place is unthinkable? Hate to keep saying this, but trans women are being actually murdered and this obsessive fixation on “social murder” within the trans community exists purely to spice things up with a feeling of danger because the spaces we’ve managed to carve out for ourselves are otherwise a little too safe and it feels more authentic to the Laura Palmer Ultimate Victim narrative. Massively popular transfems with over ten thousand followers will happily sic them on people for the most upsettingly asinine reasons and then cry-type about how they’re the underdogs in every possible social situation.

But most obnoxious of all is the implication here that, because this can only happen to trans women, gossip and slander does not happen to other trans people, or other marginalized people in general.

That’s fucked, considering how much this discourse has attacked specific targets. It’s most maddening to see that “the coiner of the word transandrophobia has dykebreaking+detransitioning-of-transfems kink” has evolved to “most people who believe in transandrophobia have those kinks” because I constantly see TERFs making huge compilations of transfem blogs engaging in cis dykebreaking kink from the dom perspective. Just transfem dom blog after transfem dom blog enthusiastically into cis dykebreaking, which TERFs use to paint us in a way that fits their narrative.

Literally the only example they can ever give of a transandrophobia-connected person* being a dom for dykebreaking with transfem subs is someone who was being paid by a transfem. Detrans kink is overwhelmingly non-transfems, but almost exclusively as subs to either transfems or cis men, and those transfems aren’t getting paid for it, they actually are just in it for the love of the game. There’s nothing wrong with that, but people want to act like there is when it’s anyone else, and that’s not only weird but also setting up a bear trap to step in later.

Which gets to the point that, hey, wow, I’ve noticed a lot of cis women in particular who self-identify as TME are super into anti-shipping. You cannot possibly imagine you’re safe for trans women if your big issue with trans men articulating their oppression is “they masturbate evilly.” Popular transfem blogs will talk at length about how you shouldn’t judge transfems for their kinks but cis women are so eager to kinkshame transmascs that they not only make shit up out of thin air, but specifically copy and paste kinks almost entirely made up of transfems onto transmascs. Someday very soon a TERF is going to show them it’s much more convenient to be a general transphobe and not make special exceptions for the ones that use the same pronouns as you. They’re going to show your anti-ship cis lesbian friend one of those transfem dykebreaking blog compilations and she’ll take Trans Rights Are Human Rights out of her bio within the hour.

Like, even if you didn’t care about being monstrously inhumane to others, all of this is so against transfem self-interests in the long run, but people who consider themselves the most transfeminist transfeminists there are, of a radical nature, one might say, care more about notes than helping anyone, least of all the transfems they’re feeding into a grinder of paranoia and isolation. Especially the isolation.

It’s a little hard to take it seriously when I get accused of calling all trans women groomers for thinking it’s bad when people talk about “curing” other trans women’s “comphet,” how “TMEs” are obligated to bottom for them to compensate for transmisogyny, and writing long treatises on why it’s one’s moral responsibility to throw forcefem kink at random men because they may like it. Like, am I saying trans women are groomers, or am I saying some people use being members of a marginalized community to be kinna gross? People somehow find it in them to be angry at gay men who cross boundaries in spite of the messaging that they’re all sex abusers for the past two hundred years. Especially since 90% of the concern is for other trans women.Like, sorry, but I care enough about trans women that I’m going to say something if I think you’re putting them in a bad situation, and someone being a trans woman doesn’t make them immune to that. But oh, it does if you assume that this is all just common sense transfeminism, and I am in fact making this accusation of most trans women instead of an extremely niche group.

Never mind that in the screencap people use to accuse me of calling trans women “rapists” I was saying something a self-identified TME said was coercive, and whose identity as a Not a Trans Woman I explicitly noted.** Never mind that I’m the not the one telling people to name their blogs after the original transbian separatist group that famously fell apart after resulting in heavy sexual abuse. Never mind that I have said over and over again that TRFs act no more entitled to people’s bodies than lesbian TERFs who treat people they perceive as women the same way.

But I’m supposed to believe that those cis anti-shippers who post things like “every time someone says kinks are fine they’re just protecting predators in the LGBT community” is a great ally and I’m a traitor because they hate men and I don’t?

Sorry, no, not a traitor. A “pickme begging to be beaten to death with hammers.” Who’s probably not even actually a trans woman. Great transfeminism, yall. You’re really fighting transmisogyny.

It’s especially galling now that TRFs have taken to calling transandrophobia “reactionary,” the most bullshit possible way to call a group that includes a huge number of PoC, who they constantly accuse of tokenization, a pack of Nazis. What is transandrophobia reacting to? Bigotry? Golly gee, I guess so! Or maybe it’s “reacting” to transmisogyny as part of the completely absurd idea that trasnmascs steal everything from transfems. Like, yeah, sure girliepop, and we stole misogyny from cis women, right? Sorry you failed to not sound exactly like a TERF yet again but maybe try again tomorrow and you’ll finally earn not being called a radfem.

But isn’t it sooooo mean of me to compare a small amount of trans women to radfems? Like their��oppressors? Well, first of all, they regularly refer to Jewish people as Nazis, discourse aside that they do that is simply a true fact which shows they indeed think it’s possible to justify comparisons like that, although in their case it’s just because it feels like getting off a sick burn and rhetorical W to go “ah, but what if this Jewish person…was a Nazi? Checkmate, Zionists.”

Secondly, for as much as TRFs want to claim TERFs only hate them, that’s simply not true and I have conclusively proven this with basic use of Tumblr’s search function and the tag “radblr.” Twice. If you believe they love transmascs and only want what’s best for them, congratulations dipshit, you fell for their propaganda so hard I’m surprised they haven’t managed to convince you you’re not a woman. Or is it only an obvious lie when it’s about you?

Most annoyingly, just on a personal level, is the way TRFs get pissed off at non-transfem feminine AMAB people for daring to exist. The idea that femboy is a slur for trans women would be laughable if it weren’t grotesque in it’s ignorance. The things I’ve read people say about how transmisogynistic it is for an anime character to be a crossdressing man instead of a trans woman are just infuriatingly racist. Not everything is about you and it’s not actually a big deal if people talk about others once in blue moon.

The constant posts about how non-transfems are evil for not making more transfem headcanons, or for headcanoning the TRF’s favorite canonically male character wrong, are particularly childish. I can’t even go into MY favorite blorbo’s tag without seeing people call transmasc headcanons of him inferior literary analysis completely without irony, and every single time they shit like this, they do it while making up the most convoluted and nonsensical explanations for why the character can only be transfem instead, as though the hostility is defensiveness born out of their particular blorbo requiring a lot of creativity to headcanon that way, necessitating going to war to prove they can’t really be a man to assert it as The One Truth. Then they’ll complain until the fucking heat death of the universe about how everyone loves transmasc headcanons because of transmisogyny.

It’s the same unbearable on-sight hostility as when a TERF sees a child on the subway and goes home to type up a novel of a post on how he had the eyes of a future wife-beater, and it’s so irritating to see it spread from one corner to another. Literally, TRFs say that trans men will always turn on trans women and eventually detransition to wield their wymbnly power against us, and I’m expected to not see that as having severe hang-ups about people born into what they want to transition into and have denied to them by society’s transphobia?

What about the fact that they constantly mock AFAB trans people in ways specifically targeting that trait, calling non-binary people “theyfabs,” joking it’s easy to misgender trans men when they have large breasts, and reduce transmasc stereotypes to feminine “soft bois?” Like, yeah, okay, you’re not projecting any gaping insecurities you may have about assigned sex and gender roles when you say transmasc music is ukuleles and transfem music is heavy metal, next tell me about how transmascs all enjoy tea parties and transfems all go to football games.

But it’s not even mostly trans women who keep this shit alive in the first place. A higher percentage of total trans women on this site are into this framework, but the total number of non-transfem trans people and cis women so outweighs them in the first place that it cancels that out. Like, if x is higher than y, and x% of trans women on Tumblr agree but only y% of “TME” people do, that’s still a movement mostly consisting of “TME” people. The full separatist angle would very quickly reveal how little air it has to burn if trans women truly only had themselves to watch out for each other. Unfortunately, self-identified TMEs are much more likely to get TERFier rather than simply less TRF-y when the spell breaks and they realize how fucked up this shit is, while the people who’ve been batted at continue to exercise the patience of a saint and continue to fight for trans women anyway.

And that! Is what hurts! The most! The fact that people do not care about transmascs and in particular the ones who believe in transandrophobia are constantly tripping over themselves to defend and help trans women as much as they possibly can. I wish people saw that. I wish that mattered. It’s like watching a black hole suck up an endless font of goodwill and love. And then going “lol reactionary transandrobros hate trans women.”

That’s it, though, the great irony of it all is that if it were true, it’d never have become popular in the first place. It’s kept aloft by self-identified TMEs who are well-meaning if not especially good at critical thinking, except for the the contingent that are convinced trans men are all misogynistic because they personally are, or even outright seem to get gender euphoria from the idea they have male privilege. But for whatever reason, if “TME” folks didn’t care? The people making up elaborate tales of their potential (social) murder would have to find some other way to get attention.

I suggest throwing on a big red nose and joining a circus.

*and I specify “transandrophobia-connected” but you’d have a hard time rustling up transmasc doms in general from those scenes

**also, despite it being something I saw with my own eyes, I notably did not even feel it hit the level of needing to directly name someone as being who I was basing my assessment of sexual coercive behavior on as being sexually coercive, because I think it's much more a prevalent attitude of pressure in sexual contexts than individual behavior

[giantkillerjack]

Ya know. I spent most of my life with horrible painful soul-crushing social anxiety.

And after about 25 years of continuous hard work, suddenly, people started pointing out - to my utter bafflement - that I had, in fact, achieved my lifelong dream of being charismatic. I'm 29 now; I feel comfortable in most social situations, and it is a very rare person whom I cannot make laugh.

I am, undoubtedly, finally, charismatic.

But do you know what I found?

I found that now that I have an understanding of which social rules serve which functions -- Now that I have an understanding of just how much damage my awkwardness was doing to people, well,

I found that, actually, my awkwardness never really hurt anyone at all. People were just judgmental dicks to me about it.

Now that I have the skill-level to (most of the time) creatively vocalize what is in my head as soon as I think it and without fear, I can confirm once and for all what I had always suspected:

I was worth talking to when I was quiet.

I was worth talking to when I was awkward, and when the words in my head took time and patience to hear, and when most of my jokes didn't land. I was worth talking to the whole time.

So I just... I hope that if you've ever wondered whether you are worth communicating with, the answer is yes. Absolutely yes. Each of us has a soul worth sharing - and if you and I were talking, I would happily wait for you to speak (or communicate in other ways) without condescending, and I would never shame you for that harmless awkwardness that so many people feel the need to violently stomp out.

You are worth talking to. You just are. And you deserve people who will speak to you with kindness, with patience, and with the basic immutable respect owed to all people.

(I talk about this with some frequency, both on tumblr and in real life. At some point, maybe I'll gather all my thoughts on the matter into one post. At some point, I wrote about my personal experience trying to build my social skill. But I felt the need to say at least a little bit tonight after seeing this other lovely post, and I'm glad I did. It will happen again.)

[mutalune]

hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery

[werewolfetone]

Lying on my bed giggling kicking my legs thinking abt the changes I just made to my oc lore

[1pcii]

thinking about younger 124ji as years of this kind of unchecked thinking and behaviour, mixed with their unnatural lack of empathy bringing them to the cartoonist extremes they display in canon.

[feral-radfem]

I have no problem with equalitarians, I disagree with their approach but their movement is for a good cause. If they think clumping all oppressed minorities into one movement because every oppressed group has people in it who experience further oppression within them, so be it. That's their prerogative.

I, however, do believe that this causes division from the main goal of any given social movement and plays into Oppression Olympic dispositions. Just like every minority group has individuals who are also oppressed on other status, the same is true about people within a minority group being someones oppressors on other axises. While I definitely wish we could all just agree to support one another against all systematic structures of oppression that is simply unrealistic. I have no desire to work within the realm of the idealists.

A women's movement should just be about women's oppression, misogyny. Helping the most women, with the greatest need, as much as we can regardless of other factors. A gay movement should be about SSA people's oppression, homophobia. Helping the most SSA , with the greatest need, as much as we can, regardless of other factors.

Forcing communities to try to team up ends up with these communities fighting themselves more than their oppressors. I'm mean most of radical feminist spaces are broken up and divided on different oppressed identities where we are justifying the sexist mistreatment of other women, in our anti-misogyny space, because they are somebody elses oppressor on a different axis. Or we are justifying removing them from radical feminist spaces and its entirety over issues that are not misogyny. Limiting the support and help they can get as a woman facing misogyny. Other identifying factors should be irrelevant because this space isn't for advocating against homophobia, classism, or ableism.

Even though things have the possibility of affecting some of the women here. We can observe which demographic of women may have the most need for any given solution based on these factors, and we should, but that is as far as it should go or else we are slipping into egalitarian territory. Radical feminism is not an egalitarian movement.

While I wish every woman here wouldn't be homophobic, normalizing homosexuality is not the goal of feminism. While I wish they would not be ableist against the mentally ill, advocating for the acceptance of mentally ill individuals on the bases of their illness is not the goal of radical feminism. This remains the case even though there are women who are gay and who are mentally ill. We would help those women's with the sex-based oppression they are experiencing, and then they would go to mental health or gay activists to fight for their rights on those fronts. Where, I can admit men will most likely be the focus, but much like all women benefit from women's rights and liberations, all mentally ill people benefit from policies against discrimination for the mentally ill. Even if they were made with only men in mind. Same for any other axis of oppression.

I can recognize, even as a feminist, that trying to make political topics of class away from the poor general population to just poor women is divisive and limits the scope of support from class efforts. Because while there may be people who agree with one topic, they may not agree with the other, and they were trying to collect support and funds for their social movement so that they can make change for the whole group they are advocating for.

Every minority group is in conflict for finite resources. Each social movement is fighting for money, exposure, positive propaganda, activists, politicians, and the legal consideration. Most of these things have limited slots and we can't all share them.

So this is my controversial opinion: When you join a social movement, join it for the whole movement not just for the parts that benefit you. Realize that you're going to have to fight with women who will gleefully oppress you on other identifiers because this movement is about women. Even the most hateful homophobic, ableist, classist woman has a rightful spot in this movement. You don't have to like her, you don't have to be her friend, you can openly disagree with her if you want but it has nothing to do with feminism, because feminism is about combating misogyny, not every hardship a woman happens to face. Just like every choice of woman makes doesn't make it a feminist choice, every hardship a woman goes through doesn't make it misogynistic hardship.

Understand that we are going to have to go and be a part of multiple movements if we want to uplift every oppressed identity we have. That they cannot all be accomplished under the one umbrella feminism just because they are women in every other oppressed group. That's just egalitarianism which distracts from the goals we could be advocating towards that help liberate all women, such as the Nordic model, porn restrictions, abortion rights, child care, medical misogyny, ect. Obviously these effect women of all demographics across all religions, all races, all sexualities. It would benefit all women to have these things dictated in law and those resources allocated where they need to be.

Honestly, I feel, that equalitarianism is currently the reason people are pretending most men are not oppressors because they are oppressed on different social statuses. It is the death of genuine social movements. It destroys class consciousness and pits the people who should be your allies for this given social movement against one another. Everyone can take the steps they believe is necessary to bring about a brighter future, I just disagree that this is the right one. It feels way too idealistic.

[rimouskis]

when I first started my job, I'd often overplay my emotional detachment to it because I had moved from a high-emotional/personal-involvement industry into a soulless corporate one.

and to, like, justify that decision and explain it to my high-emotional/personal-involvement peers from that old industry, I'd be like "lol I don't really care, you know? the job suits my skill set and I can do it, so it's all good:)"... but I've come to the realization that I actually really enjoy doing the labor of my job and it's weirdly hard to admit that!!

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

[elftwink]

been reading fanfiction at the front counter at work as of late because our fiction selection that's available to read online is sparse, there's only so much academic non-fiction a man can read especially when he's just blindly in the catalogue looking up random keywords in the hope of finding something even mildly interesting, and i haven't been able to get out to my local library to fix my library card that doesn't let me log in and possibly has no associated email to access their ebook collections. and i can't do anything at the front desk that doesn't look work-related so i've been downloading pdfs of fics and emailing them to myself to pass the yawning void of hours between the 3 whole patrons who are there during the semester break.

anyway im telling you all this because i sent a few to myself and all but one (1) fic i was like oh my GOD he Would Not Fucking Say That. but i had nothing else to do not even work related tasks so i read them anyway. woe is me. i will learn nothing from this and do the exact same thing tomorrow probably