Tumgik
#which I know is unhealthy
nope-body · 2 years
Text
.
#feel like how I did in high school senior year#running on empty but somehow still running with no plans to stop any time soon#which I know is unhealthy#but also if I’m not doing everything I can then what worth do I have?#if I could be doing something and I’m not#what’s the point of doing anything in the first place#if I can’t do everything and do it well then I’m worthless#and I *know* that this is black and white thinking#and I know that it’s because I never got praise for being anything less than work-myself-to-the-bone burn-out extraordinary#my parents weren’t proud of me just for doing something#I designed and ran lights for four different shows in high school and they didn’t even go to any#I was the tech director for a show! did they go? nope#I built sets and painted and fixed problems and taught new techies and it was never enough#I did the entirety of tech for so many rentals- some of them not just lights but also sound and for a few even assistant directing#I hung focused and programmed lights for a performance in under an hour and a half#it was never enough#I started a club! on my own! held a wildly successful fundraiser and collaborated with other clubs and went on a field trip#and ensured its success after I left and it has since flourished!#I made it to finals at regionals on speech team which almost no one does on our team!#and maybe there was a good job thrown in there or something but overall it was just#I could have done more. been better#and I don’t even know who I’m trying to prove my worth to at this point!#yeah maybe I want my parents to be proud of me but honestly I couldn’t give a fuck about what they say because that ship has sailed#i know my friends are friends with me because of who I am and not how much I do#I know that I’m just a freshman and that a lot of people don’t even know their major yet much less are actively working towards it and#deeply involved in the department#I don’t know. I just feel the threat of failure looming over me#and I don’t even know what I’d be failing at and I think that scares me most of all#I feel like ​I have to be perfect#which is ironic when I’m in a body that is so imperfect and failing me
1 note · View note
vristrogen · 4 months
Text
something about people calling vrisrezi "toxic yuri" always puts me off. i understand the lack of words to really put their dynamic but like you know theyre in a relationship thats largely good for them right. they arent dating because "it sucks but it would be worse without each other" they genuinely really love each other a lot
148 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
jon val jon or something
105 notes · View notes
sleepy-hyperfixations · 10 months
Text
Do i think snow would have ended up a better person if he was in a poly relationship with sejanus and lucy gray*? Not particularly but couldn't hurt.
312 notes · View notes
katyspersonal · 2 months
Text
me before SoTE: Gehrman 🤝 Miquella on being seen as creeps and awful people by fandom over misinterpreting some bits!
me after SoTE: Gehrman 🤝 Miquella on not being able to accept the drastic change (mostly to the worse) of a person they held dear and latching onto their former, "nicer" version, attempting to resurrect that version even although the result is a bit of just a husk (.....AND being seen as creeps and awful people by fandom over misinterpreting some bits lololol)
_________
I guess they're doomed to be friends no matter what gfjhjgv At least with Gehrman's crafting skills, he can make him many pretty dresses
70 notes · View notes
firethekitty · 1 year
Text
post-canon vashwood that can’t keep their hands off each other. post-canon vashwood that follow each other around like shadows, to the point where people will ask where the other is if they’re alone. post-canon vashwood who are constantly hugging and prefer each other’s laps to a chair because they are not going to lose each other again. do you get what i’m saying
205 notes · View notes
lightbulb-warning · 1 month
Text
so has anyone figured out WHY there is the Need To Share our Artworks™ or is it just the vibes and our Soul apparently
#ive been running on “two cakes. u aren't BOTHERING people by putting art on their feed they can scroll past it/if they dont they get ”cake“”#and we love “cake”#“cake” is picture on the internet in this case#like okay the contracts and transaction format is a me problem!! i need to get rid of the “utilitarian brain worms” bc they're boring#this is supposed to be a hobby and the “get a good grade in hobby” wolf in the brain is just crying bc that's how they understand the world#the “get a good grade in x” wolf has valid pain but needs to stop controlling my life because they don't need to earn “enough value to live”#ect ect ect#and the life of minmaxxed utility is a life of trying to appeal to a “correct” that doesn't exist yaddi yadda = boring#i love you wolf. also shut up. affectionate. concerned. you get it#ok so we remove tangible purpose from act of experience art because THAT'S not “the point”#because “the point” is the joy killer eccetera ecc#but then what? “here check out this labor of love. i drew this fucker 15 times. no there's no story* there it's just a guy”#*story in this case being an emotional engagement/a situation/a context in which to ponder/other#so it's just a Draw. no further analysis. what do others Get from that?#i know i deeply enjoy art because im a fan of the process of People Making Stuff. i love when there was nothing but now there's something!!!#THAT'S what's it all about!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!! right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#so it stands to reason that creation is purpose enough?? to be experienced???? to be known????????#idk!!#this is a nothing burger of a thought people have always liked picture on the internet stfu maiora there doesn't need to be a reason#this is just the brainworms talking!!! because god forbid “something not have a purpose”??? blegh!!!!!!!!#sounds like unhealthy rationalizing instead of letting things be out of The Fear™!!sounds like depraving urself from joy bc of BRAINWORMS!!!#so like!!!!! picture on the internet doesn't NEED inherent value. creation is enough!! (plus there's the Attachment to Character. also.)#but then why are YOU *points at you* here? gen q!!#i made an image you like and now you are reading my word babble in some tags!!! what's THAT all about???????????#it's INTERESTING!! do you see what im trying to get at??#is it empathy??? person made something other saw something other made- other2other connection???? intrigue????????#.......all this is probably explained in some book or yt essay somewhere. oh well.#in the meantime thank you for your time! we can pretend we were stuck in an elevator together and then i started rambling#i hope you have a great rest of your day thanks for stopping by!! <3#maiora garrulates
28 notes · View notes
yourlocalabomination · 8 months
Note
i need your opinion. jeff blim tinky or curt mega tinky
Oh this is such a good question!
While I do have aspects that I love about both portrayals my overall favourite is undoubtedly Jeff’s.
In Time Bastard we get to see Tinky be absolutely deranged when it comes to fucking around with Ted, and Jeff manages to protrude that sadistic energy entirely. The laugh alone solidifies that for me. Jeff has such a way with playing unhinged characters (Hidgens in Workin’ boys, Aladdin in Twisted, The father in Trail to Oregon, etc) that I don’t think there is a better Starkid actor to play Tinky.
While Grace, Steph and Pete are acted as being scared in The Summoning honestly wasn’t that scary? For me at least? Idk it was more silly (don’t get me wrong I love The Summoning scene it just didn’t have that scare factor- I mean Curts dancing around in neon yellow). And while I do like Tinky having a more silly goofy side to him I prefer the portrayal of that having a more sadistic streak, as seen in Time Bastard.
I know that in The Summoning the LIBs “hold court in your own tongue and form”, (aka appear as teenagers) makes sense story wise and for a on stage preformance. But I’m a big fan of horror, so even the description Tinky being a:
“A solidarity figure. It wears a baggy, furry body- suit. It’s yellow and matted. Dirty. Stinking. Worst of all is its head. A motionless, demented goat mask. It has glassy, evil eyes, a slack jaw with big crooked teeth, a flopping wet tongue”.
Fuck so hard to me. That shit slaps ok. Tinky being refered to a “The thing”, “This creature”, “The nightmare goat”, in the Time Bastard script? Give me more of that please.
(I know that this isn’t particularly pertaining to Jeff’s portrayal, more of the script writing, but they go hand in hand. The script is only as good as the actors can make it. And Jeff does that description of Tinky so much justice).
All that being said- when it comes to drawing Tinky I prefer to draw him as Curt (plus a few extra things added to put my own spin on the design) due to that being his first human form portrayal. Also because I can’t draw goats.
Despite all this, I need it to be known that “oh boy! A spankoffski! I’m going to have the whole set in my toy box!” has and will continue to rot in my brain for many more months to come.
76 notes · View notes
sockatoothewafflebird · 3 months
Text
i'm sitting out the weekend,
couldn't do it again.
say you want it right now,
but i wouldn't know how!
it's something that i can't do...
then what am i supposed to?
i'm quite the people-pleaser,
if only i could please her..
Tumblr media Tumblr media
...i'm talking while you're next to me;
did i ruin the moment?
if i coild tell you how i feel,
would you know what the words meant...?
for sake of conversation,
could you read the writings on my sleeve?
cause that's the best you're gonna get.
so maybe i had better leave.
Pleaser by Wallows, look it up on yt,,, oh my god it's so goooood.
the song is about how A can't or won't communicate with B and it starts to break them apart. A is a people pleaser, and B is noticing that they're struggling and wants them to be able to say what the feel, to be transparent with them, but... A just can't, and it eats away at both of them. A is literally eating away at themselves from the inside because they're frustrated with themselves; they can't get the words out. ((it might have something to do with not being able to please your partner in a sexual sense with how some of it, especially the chorus, is worded, but i'm ignoring that part mostly.))
that premise sounds awfully familiar... hmm, i wonder which pair this reminds us of. of course it's ragatha as A and pomni as B, in my opinion. although it could be the other way around, it depends on the situation.
every time i hear this song i think about them. it's consuming me. i'd like to apologize to Wallows for dissecting their song in the context of fucking digital circus because like it's the only reason i listen to this song anymtoe..... im sorry......
33 notes · View notes
yellowocaballero · 4 months
Note
so! saw you mentioned jjk, so if you wanna talk about it, whats your thoughts been on it so far?
Was waiting to answer this until I finished S2, which I just did.
It's incredible. It's an amazing work of art. Some of the best fighting animation I've ever seen in an anime, some of the best fight scenes period, non-stop gripping and thrilling and incredibly exciting. Gorgeous, cool as fuck, a lot of fun. Binged it and was extremely unwilling to do anything other than watch it. Real 'wander out of my room, rant to my roommates about how good it is, ignore their confused looks and wander back in my room to continue binging' energy.
Beyond that, my thoughts are a bit complex and difficult to put into words. It's great at a lot of things besides action - it has great characters, humor, world-building, everything. I would like to see more of the other things it's good at, and I think that would elevate the fight scenes a lot. I won't go into a tangent about what makes "a good action movie", but basically in good action work the action scenes need to have a lot of weight. S2 was basically 15 episodes of the climax of an incredible action movie, and a lot of the fight scenes would have been stronger if there was greater buildup or a more coherent escalation (Mahito loses every fight, which makes it hard to take his very lengthy subsequent fights seriously)(Gojo himself is a mystifying choice)(My only coherent thought for two episodes straight was 'Mahito just fucking die already'). My personal belief about arcs in serialized works is that they should work as full stories in isolation and have a coherent beginning, middle, climax, and end; one that still slots into the greater narrative of the serialized work and meaningfully develops the characters, world, and overarching plotline. S2 was, again, 15 episodes of climactic fight scene. But the climactic fight scenes were so fucking good.
It's a lot of things that I normally like in theory and are extremely bored of in practice. JJK really lived up to the theory of "what if a shonen action anime was only action and it was so so so so so good". If you do want an example of mangakas who do work that's 95% action that's skimpy on characters/plot/etc but still feel like an extremely complete experience, I recommend Nightow's Blood Blockade Battlefront.
Lots of criticism on a show I fucking loved, but you are talking to someone for whom "they punched so good and then the explosions were so pretty and I pumped the air and was satiated by the violence" is a 5/5 glowing four thumbs up review. The characters themselves were so endearing and fascinating and charismatic, which is an understated but important aspect of an action work. They don't have to be deep or complex, but you do have to get me invested in them and make them fun to watch. It also has incredible and well-utilized women, which esp in male oriented work I do genuinely consider a barometer of quality - not 'badass women automatically makes something good', but 'a creator who can write every character well is good at creating characters and if you can't create all your characters well or feel uncomfortable with portraying half the population then you aren't good at creating characters'.
Geto/Gojo will never be KakaObi and you are all lying to yourselves.
36 notes · View notes
toxooz · 3 months
Note
I know the answer might be no but still!
Are you ever going to make or add your characters into character ai?
I think it'll be really cool to be able to talk to Ollie, or just talk to the whole gang!!
Also lots of love to your art and comic, I found this comic when I was at my lowest and it really helped me out when I was really sad in depressed! Thank you for making this comic and for doing all of this amazing work that you have put in to your characters and storyline!!!
look 🙏 i do see the possible appeal in that i aint gunna lie one bit and as the creator of these characters the idea of being able to seemingly talk to them sounds pretty cool! BUT i simply cant jump on the AI train to Any extent it just wouldn't sit right with me. I feel like it would unnerve me after a while plus the idea of my OCs being 'off' or having out of character dialogue that's out of my control kinda gives me the willies. It seems like one of those things that are simply too good to be true in a practical sense so any possibility of it happening just goes into uncanny valley like do i wish i could take my ocs out of my brain and talk to them HELL yes ( if i dont get killed first) but that should be an impossible thing to do unless im dreaming or hallucinating or some shit. It's like the AI images ie. i Could just type in a bunch of prompts and shit out like 30000 images of my ocs so that i could look at them but where would the yearning be after that??? The loving sculpting of them in my brain while im trying to capture their essence with my hands into a drawing??? One of the main reasons for my ocs to exist is so that its something for my brain to toy around with and wallow in like a cat in catnip, so the idea of being able to just 'lay everything out' so easily just ruins the whole ' i have mysterious little dudes in my head that i mold around everyday to try and figure them out' aspect if that makes any sense??? PLUS im pretty sure the chat ai basically takes paragraphs from writers so for me to be so abhorrently against ai images yet being on board with chat ai when its ~surprise~ stealing from real writers feels like the most hypocritical ass shit i could do sO long old head 'robots evil' rant short: its a no from me dawg
BUT THAT ASIDE im glad to hear u like wheel bitten!! That means so much to hear and may your life continue to improve and thrive!✨🌟
Tumblr media
27 notes · View notes
sciderman · 5 months
Note
Sometimes i remember a comics moment i randomly came across somewhere, where Sam Wilson mentiones a musical and Steve Rodgers says he doesn't like musicals, to whitch Sam goes "Guess that means you really are straight" and even tho i don't care about Cap America or the Avengers, the moment stuck in me for that quote by Sam. And like....Sci, any ideas if straight men actually don't like musicals or is that bullshit?
actually i think i know more gay men who hate musicals than i know straight men who hate musicals. i've had a drag queen stop me point blank when i was about to sing a barbra streisand song, and i know so many gays who pointedly hate abba. so based on my experience i think the inverse is true. most of the straight men i know are kind of impartial about musicals, but gay men? hate.
my theory is that a lot of gay men don't want to fall into stereotypes, maybe. but thaaaaat's just a theory! a gay theory.
#sci speaks#i'm trying to understand the gays. they are a mystery to me.#i've seen a lot more toxic masculinity coming from gay men than i have from straight men.#i think it makes sense. they have less women in their lives. so they reckon with a lot more masculinity. more dick measuring.#also gay men have some of THE most unhealthy romantic relationships i've ever seen in my life.#this isn't a blanket statement on everyone but just from what i've seen. it's such a strange pattern i've observed.#lesbians? healthy. straights? usually healthy. gay men? universally a tire fire that makes me say “if you hate each other so much ??”#“why are you together??????????”#i have never met a cis gay mlm couple in real life that was healthy. every single one of them made my eyes widen in horror.#i want them to be healthy. please treat each other better.#the number of bitchy bitchy fights i've seen between mlm couples in public that make me so terrified#but i know mlm relationships in general are usually less... affectionate than wlw relationships. even and especially friendships.#just an observation.#i hate to say that there is a definite difference between amab vs afab experiences when it comes to relationship dynamics but.#of course there is. there is. as much as i want to say gender and sex do not matter. it really does.#it makes a difference. it does.#which is kind of why i'm glad i was born in the body i was. when people say “trans means you feel you were born in the wrong body”#im like.. i don't think that's true. i don't think that's true for me.#i wouldn't be me if i wasn't born the way i was. and i want to be me. but i'm a boy. i'm a boy but in the body that i have.#my body is still a boy's body. because i live in here.#sorry this went off on a tangent.#but yeah i know my brain would be different if i was amab. and i don't want all those other issues.#i think the only reason i'm so peaceful and serene is because i'm afab. and afabulous.#i see cis guys and im like.. yeah i don't want what you got.#once again! lucky to be me! i'm lucky. im lucky i have a vargooba. thank fuck for that!#couldve been so much worse off. could've been born with a dick and would be fighting for my life right now.
40 notes · View notes
daydreamerdrew · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
All-Star Batman and Robin, the Boy Wonder (2005) #1
29 notes · View notes
moeblob · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media
Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
25 notes · View notes
loopdile · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media
transcription under the cut!
The worst ship chart ever.
Ship name: Loopdile
[insert very tiny math] Ages: 43 and 31? Age difference: 8?
Portrait of Odile with an eyebrow raised saying "I'm not telling." Name: Odile. Gender: trans woman (maybe nb but idrc rn). Sexuality: Aro lesbian.
Portrait of Loop with a finger raised saying "I'm not telling~" Name: Loop. Gender: Nonbinary (??? what is identity). Sexuality: Ace bi
General sliders. "Relationship starts quickly vs the slowest burn you can possibly imagine" is marked fairly close to slowly and trails off towards slow burn. "They'll be together forever vs They'll break up after 2 months tops" has two marks, one at 2 months and one really close to forever. "Cute couple vs dear god they're ugly" is marked a quarter slider away from cute. "Reasonably healthy and normal relationship vs They're dying and getting killed and hurt man" has a wide mark all the way from the halfway point to a quarter away from healthy. "Extremely popular ship vs literally no one ships this but me" is marked fairly close to no one.
Specific sliders. "Giddy and happy to be in love vs they just killed themselves 40 times in their head at the idea of being in love" has loop at died and odile fairly close to died. "The madoka vs the homura" has loop at homura and odile a third of the slider away. "Telling anyone who will listen about their partner vs rarely brings up that they're in a relationship" has loop a quarter away from telling anyone and odile fairly close to rarely. "eats and/or encourages a healthy diet vs eats dry instant noodles only" has loop at noodles and odile a third away from healthy. "crazy ass vs truck freak" has loop at crazy ass and odile fairly close to truck freak.
Tell me why your ship is interesting... go!
What draws them together? Odile is the only motherfucker that can handle them; Loop is weird and intriguing.
What stands in the way? Poor communication skills; Loop is clingy but Odile often needs space; Loop lashes out and self-isolates.
What are their good traits? They're both hilarious and dedicated to the bit; they're both devoted to their loved ones.
What makes them hopeless at romance? Odile is aro-spec and uninterested in romance; Loop both hates/fears and craves romance; Luckily they can just be something stranger!
Describe them with one trope: found family, deadpan x emotional, secret third thing, I'll protect you from yourself.
#suicide mention#these are today's headcanons... tomorrow? who knows.....#so. the weird sliders.#siffrin had a low grade crush on odile which. obviously didn't instantly come to fruition but it's not exactly a slow burn situation eithe?#and then during sasasap and isat loop's emotions about everything ever were. not doing great#they come out of canon a total mess#and odile's like ...i could fix them. NO WAIT IM NOT DOING THAT.#so again the thought is there and. a little more slowburn y this time. but only for a specific part of the dynamic#and then there's kinda a slow build of loop's new dynamics w everyone in the group?#and the thing with odile escalates into being a Thing#but again it's hard to call it slow burn bc there's no like. line to tip over into dating.#but it's not *instant* either#it's a snowball gaining speed downhill#ok next weird slider#oh yeah#they 'break up' fairly often as one of loop's 'this is 100% a joke and not my real feelings at all' bits#even though they're not dating and they don't actually want to break off whatever shit they do have going on#it's a way to express a need for change#BUT the whole family is in it for the long haul#and loop and odile's dynamic may shift over time but again. there's no 'breaking up' line#so they won't necessarily be [together?] forever but they will be together forever#and then it's. not an *unhealthy* relationship but it's not normal either lol#with a whole range of behaviors between 'genuinely helpful to each other' and 'lmao what the fuck guys'#ok those r the weird ones! the rest are obvious right. like ofc odile is closer to truck freak 🙄 but not entirely
19 notes · View notes
mid-nightowl · 10 months
Note
paramedic/EMT dick is so good omg :o i hadn’t thought about that one
i have seen social worker dick which also felt really appropriate (also love that for jason) but!!! EMT actually feels like it works better to me???
thank u for putting that thought in my head~
ahhhhhhh!! i am so ecstatic i could put the thought of emt/paramedic!dick in your head hehehehe
paramedic!dick is so special to me<3 it very much i think hits what dick needs and wants out of his civilian life but also directly influences his vigilantism too
my main three takeaways are these:
it's a highly rewarding but deeply traumatizing career and it scratches his innate need to help people without violence & fear
it's a little bit more training than a police officer but i think covers a field of knowledge dick knows but doesn't know intimately like he does criminal justice or law. it would also benefit his "night" job to be more equipped to handle traumatic injuries
ems schedules are chaotic and all over the place especially if the garage is down a paramedic or ALS provider or just overall understaffed but the overall structure of it would be good for dick (if he can balance his work-vigilantism life healthily, depending on how you write him)
42 notes · View notes