#where I feel like a priority for people i prioritize and care about

[silversiren1101]

All I want for Christmas is to see a better year.

[steddieas-shegoes]

Country singer Steve Harrington, who has always leaned more into the pop country side of things (think Wanted by Hunter Hayes), but wants his third album to be more true to old school country roots.

His label agrees but only if he works with Eddie Munson, a rock star who had to leave the spotlight when he got kicked out of his band for, well, rockstar behavior gone too far.

Steve isn't amused, especially because he doesn't care for metal music or rock star shenanigans. He was "raised better" and doesn't think Eddie could sit down and write songs with actual emotion and feeling.

Cue long songwriting sessions where Eddie is trying his hardest to be on his best behavior because he knows this is his last shot at being taken seriously, and Steve being surprised every time Eddie proves that he's talented as a songwriter and musician, well outside the scope of just metal and rock.

They write a song that they're both so proud of, Steve asks if he'll record it with him just for fun. The released version would just be Steve.

Eddie agrees.

It's an incredible duet, something country music has needed forever, but Eddie doesn't want that version out there.

The label genuinely accidentally releases their version instead of the Steve only version. As soon as they realize, they remove it from official places, but it's too late.

Fans have already heard it and have gone crazy over it, begging them to let the radio play this version, begging for this version to be available for streaming. The Steve version is great, but it doesn't have the emotion that's laced in the tone of them singing together.

Eddie finally gives in when he sees how happy Steve is about the reaction to it.

But the label decides they want them to tour together, have Eddie work as his opening act, perform his acoustic songs that haven't been officially released anywhere. Eddie can't do it.

He can't go back into that lifestyle. He couldn't do it to his band, who made him promise that he'd come back to them when he got his shit straight. He can't do it to his fans, who stuck by him through some rough shit, but probably wouldn't support a fucking country music career. He definitely can't do it to Steve, who deserves to have someone with him who can be trusted not to go off the deep end.

So he runs. He hides. His uncle welcomes him home, congratulates him on finally embracing his country roots.

It doesn't take long for Steve to find him.

Because he'd been more honest with Steve than he'd ever been with anyone. He told him about his childhood, his Uncle Wayne, his struggle to make it. He told him about his worse struggle when he did make it, how he got in with the wrong people, the wrong things. Prioritized the lifestyle more than his own life.

Of course Steve knew where he'd run to.

Of course Steve came to remind him what his life could be if he allowed himself to find new priorities.

Steve's lips were pretty persuasive, but not nearly as persuasive as his promises to remind him what he could have if he kept his life his priority.

"But what if I let you down?"

"You won't."

"But-"

"No. You won't. You're gonna do amazing things for yourself. And I'm gonna be there to see it happen. That's all."

And he was.

They co-wrote Steve's entire album while Eddie worked on recording his own original songs. He liked that it was an old school rock and roll feel, some blues, some country, some hints of metal sneaking in on a couple songs.

He called his band to come help him with a song, hesitant to even ask, but they came. Of course they came.

He called his Uncle Wayne to play banjo on a song, worried that he wouldn't like the heavier electric guitar notes over it. Of course he loved being involved.

When their tour started, he let himself actually feel nervous.

But instead of running, he looked at the man who supported him through it, even when his own career was on the line.

Of course Steve was there.

[zzencat]

Why Am I So Hard On Myself? - Timeless ⏳

Breathe and choose. Left to right.

Kinda doing this one on a whim but figured it could help anyone who needs to be heard and have their doubts or feelings validated. You’re not alone. Does it say anything else about you?

TO ENHANCE ACCURACY BEFORE CHOOSING: Clear your mind. Time is now patient and still. Close your eyes, inhale deeply, fill your chest up to the fullest, feel the soft air brush up against the ridges of your nose. Breathe out.

———————————————-

Pile 1 | “no matter how hard i try…”

somehow, something always goes wrong. you always try to salvage what you can, picking up the pieces and trying to make the most of the situation, but maybe the timing is shit, or it isn’t met up to standard. plans ruined, connections gone, opportunities lost. even when all you do is try and try. you might even think “why is this even happening? im only breathing”

small note: while shuffling, it was going pretty nicely then cards started flying out of my hands like fliers on a windy day. it’s a small thing, but to me, it has to do with having constant roadblocks and inconveniences, and that maybe you feel like you’re at your last straw sometimes

you want to be seen for your efforts. at least some acknowledgment that someone knows, sees, and understands that you’re trying. someone to hear you out for once and take you seriously, even if none of what you’d done or contributed has worked before. just acknowledgment would be enough. maybe you’re the only one who recognizes your efforts.

i think you struggle with maintaining career, friendships, or really anything, in general. the foundations laid out might’ve been risky or unstable to begin with so you could question why things don’t last for you. a part of you expects the heartbreak to happen.

it’s crazy bc in this pile, there’s so much…optimism and hope (that might be dying out or feels like it has already) that one day something will work out

your heart isn’t completely closed and you’ll still have it open to accept things, even when you think it shouldn’t. this is what makes you a stronger person. it opens a wide range of doors for you, whether you know it or not. don’t give up.

———————————————————————————————————————

Pile 2 | “look out!”

you’re so used to prioritizing others and putting yourself last. bc of this, you could’ve missed out on many things and lost opportunities

you have a big heart and hella good energy — an abundance of it — but for some reason, it’s rarely spent on yourself

you feel like it’s your responsibility, all of it — to run or lead things, as if it’s all in your hands. to take over when things are about to fall apart. who made it your responsibility to carry the burdens of others? what happens then if they don’t reciprocate or return the same generosity?

all of this energy is being redirected to the wrong places when you should be thinking about yourself too. how can you help others when you can’t even help yourself? how about your own dreams and goals? you’re human too, so you need the care and support as well. your energy doesn’t just grow on trees. put yourself high on your own list. make yourself a priority for once. book a spa day and have someone else take over for the day.

——————————————————————————————————-

Pile 3 | *whistling*

for this pile, it seems to be more family related, where your pursuits, outlooks, or the way you treat yourself is how you were treated growing up. there’s some connection to pile 2 as well, so there could be some messages in pile 2 for you if it caught your eye

parent(s)/caretakers put a lot of pressure on you with crazy expectations or nitpicking, sometimes maybe even emotional manipulation like guilt tripping

there’s a need to take more charge in your life, especially in the creative and emotional corners of it, and also to create more meaningful and deep connections

some people in this pile might be easily defensive as well too. in this lifetime, you’re gonna learn to put your guard down, bc perhaps you’d grown up feeling trapped and forced into a mold you didn’t belong in

you could struggle with emotional commitment or generally sticking to one thing. there are probably too many things you wanna do or end up trying at least once. relationships might not last too long. there could even be a subconscious fear that you won’t be able to meet someone else’s emotional needs or standards.

you’re very spontaneous and prob get bored easily. also prob struggled academically (ex: having a hard time understand in subjects, sticking to one thing/constantly changing interests or majors, feeling trapped, giving up)

you’re lowkey a perfectionist. perhaps you’re never satisfied bc you grew up with that kind of dissatisfaction on yourself, likely by adults or maybe just things you’d picked up from adolescence

at some point, you might reflect back and feel disappointed in yourself, even if you’d just had the time of your life. it seems like this pile indulges in more superficial activities/substances to fill in the void in that chest

—————————————————————————

ending teddy note: hey guys! been a while but here’s a pac for ya!! i think this is a great pac if you don’t have someone to acknowledge the potential issues going on in your life. thank you for taking the time to read this and i really hope you enjoy it! rmr to take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. ciao!! :P

i would appreciate the feedback! lemme know what you got or think in the comments or reblogs 🦾

- The Tedster

[obeymeshallwedateaddict]

Hey.

First.

I love all your writing, they r fun to read and they make my day brighter ✨✨

Really Appreciate it.

Here is the request:

I wanted to request Solomon

We all know that his an old man ( whom we love so much ) and his based off the character from the Bible king Solomon.

If Solomon having 700 wives were true what would it be like

If MC and Solomon end up arguing over something stupid, MC just goes," Then am one of your collections to ? That's all I am to you! Right" something like that 😭

That line was horrible but something along those lines

It can be angst and fluffy.

Thanks a bunch! Wishing you an amazing day ahead!

Heyyy I absolutely love your request cuz duh. They make Solomon and the others seems like there was nothing before MC which is unlikely. Like I mean I'm pretty sure all of them had a few relationships before MC at some point or another. Anyway. Enjoy!

Author's note: I'll be posting short stories for the next few days since I'm working on a bigger story this time which will take a while. Hope it's not a problem.

Contains: Angst/Fluff

GN!MC x Solomon

You can find more of my work here: Masterlist

---

MC and Solomon had agreed to spend the evening together—just a quiet, uninterrupted night. But Solomon ended up running late, engrossed in some old spell or magical artifact he was researching, losing track of time. By the time he shows up, MC’s already feeling hurt and dismissed, thinking he prioritizes ancient things over their relationship.

MC: arms crossed, eyes narrowed as Solomon finally enters the room “Oh, look who finally decided to show up.”

Solomon: sighs, looking tired but trying to be calm “MC, I told you, I lost track of time. It happens. You know how important my research is.”

MC: “And I thought we were important too, Solomon. I’m not asking for much, just…a single night where I don’t feel like I have to compete with some dusty book or enchanted artifact.”

Solomon: growing defensive, a slight edge to his tone “It’s not a competition, MC. You’re acting like I’m choosing my work over you on purpose.”

MC: voice raising slightly, hurt “Well, that’s how it feels! You make these promises, but when it comes down to it, I’m always the one waiting. Why is it so hard for you to just…be here?”

Solomon: frowning “I’m here now, aren’t I? I don’t see why this has to be such a big deal.”

MC: glares, feeling even more hurt by his dismissive tone “A big deal? Maybe it wouldn’t be if this didn’t keep happening. You say you’re here, but half the time, I feel like I’m just a…just a side note in your never-ending list of priorities.”

Solomon: sighs, crossing his arms defensively “MC, I care about you, but I also have responsibilities—things that existed long before we ever met.”

MC: hurt, finally snapping “Oh, here we go—‘long before we met.’ That’s just it, isn’t it? This isn’t even about tonight; it’s about me realizing that I’ll never be more than one part of your centuries-long collection!”

Solomon: taken aback, not expecting that turn “What? Collection? MC, where is this even coming from?”

MC: “You probably don’t even see it, do you? How easy it is for you to just…move on, like I’m just another person you’re adding to the archive of your life. You’ve had 700 wives, haven’t you? Well, I guess I’m just another one for the record books, huh?”

Solomon: eyes widening in hurt, tone softening as he steps closer “MC, that’s not even fair. Those stories…they’re just stories, memories from lifetimes ago. I don’t know what I’ve done to make you feel like you’re ‘just another one,’ but believe me, you’re not.”

MC: arms crossed, looking away, voice trembling “It just…feels like I’ll never really matter to you. Not when you’ve had hundreds of people pass through your life like it’s nothing.”

Solomon: reaches out, resting a hand on MC’s shoulder, his tone soft and sincere “MC, I know my past seems…well, complicated, but I need you to believe that this is different. You’re not just part of my history. You’re the person I want in my present, and my future.”

MC: sighing, though still a little guarded “Then…show me, Solomon. Prove that I’m more than just a ‘number’ to you.”

Solomon: nodding with a small smile, determined “Every day, if that’s what it takes. I promise.”

[scivors]

My genuine head canons about Eddie Gluskin that I wrote in my notes app:

I'd like to add a little disclaimer: these head canons involve some heavy topics, so, if you're not comfortable, you aren't obligated to stay.

Also, I do not support any of Eddie's actions..just to make it clear..

ANYWAYS I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THIS SO HERE WE GO

Like the idea of him being a tailor (if you don't know what that means it basically means a person whose occupation is making or altering suits, jackets, and dresses typically to fit a particular person.) He's so creative and almost patient enough to work with materials. I also like to think that's something he shares in common with his mother who must've taught him a good few things about creating and measurements..

He'll hum a little tune to himself as he's working, makes him concentrate more..

It's not always, though, sometimes he loses his patience if the sewing machine isn't cooperating like it should be..

Although his whole character is based on "love" and wanting to find a special bride who loves him just as much as he loves his bride, it's sad to say that his needs will never be fulfilled..

What I mean by this is that not only are his delusions serving him zero purpose but not only that, hurting anyone that comes across him cause he's so desperate to be loved. However, these delusions could be a result of a coping mechanism from all the trauma he went through.

It's like trying to break the generational trauma but instead making it far worse than you could imagine..

So, being severely damaged as he already is, he takes it upon himself to somehow create this little world where he has a family of his own, a beautiful wife and children.

I also like to think of him being trapped in his little cell where he has nothing but a bed and his own little imagination.., staring off into either the ceiling or some random thing and just sits there..,maybe even talking to himself or laughing..

- His mother's lack of acknowledgement for what had happened to him when he was small made him develop some sense of protective nature as a fully grown adult especially when he mentions the topic about having his own children..

- "He appears so charming and friendly" is what he wants some to believe, he cares about how he presents himself time to time..

He wants you to believe he can be good, a perfect groom, a perfect father he never had. He will show you this people pleasing, gentle, kind and loving personality before he completely switches up and becomes the opposite..

- So, about the love part. Some describe him as overly obsessive, which don't get me wrong, he is. Though, it might seem like this isn't much of a big deal to him cause he will show you every ounce of love he has and shower you with it, if you plan on giving yourself to him that is. You'd be his number one priority, you'll never feel like a choice, you are his everything.. It's always like living the dream from the very start, it'll feel like a movie in Hollywood but slowly yet surely this doesn't last how it should...

Imagine being taken care of by someone as charming and loving as he is, imagine him calling you loving words in his English accent and no I'm not just talking about "darling" , I'm talking about :

"Are you alright, my love?"

"Your virtues have so strangely taken up my thoughts.."

"I think you're stunning.."

"You look as pretty as always.."

He is old fashioned, so he will eventually take it upon himself to act like a gentleman around you, he will make the first move, gets you flowers, he plans everything since he would love spend time with you.. It's all about getting to know eachother..

You'd never have to do such work, stay at home and he will do all the providing. 50/50 chance he comes back home with some nice flowers or small gifts..,like I said, old fashioned..

His thoughts would only be you. His number one priorit would always be you. But,... it's not you?..

You're you but also you're not?..

His mind creates this character of you, it's what he's expecting from you, how you act, how you talk, how you dress, how you walk..it's what he expects from you rather accepting you for who you are. This results to a lot of guilt tripping..

And I know, it sucks, but should've thought about it that before going for a psychopathic maniac that's in an asylum for a reason..

- It's quite easy to spot this one, but one of his most common triggers is when someone makes him think they're going to abandon him.

"I can't be alone!.."

By the way, his height and his strength is actually so scary that if you do eventually try to abandon him by walking away, he'll break the door down, he'll find you, he'll do unspeakable things to either you or the furniture that's in his way of trying to get close to you

(Speaking of which: I've noticed a lot of people using the term "Yandere" for an individual with mental illness. Please, stop that..)

Outside of the asylum I like to think his sense of fashion is probably top tier old money, just casual and nice..

Probably likes taking night walks with his nice coat on. That'll keep anyone from expecting him to be a psychopath..

Originally, the man ((((COULD)))) be from England, however, his parents decided to move countries from Europe to America cause they probably liked it more that way..

Eddie is definitely those kinds of people who have that one parent that's always been treating them like shit their entire childhood but still hold a special place in their heart for them cause they don't have anyone else.. That's Eddie towards his mother, I mean, he was her son...all he had was her and deep down he believes that, there was a point she wanted to help..(Even though her absence permanently damaged him)..

But somehow..that caring nature, that charming side of him, that right there, that came from her..

[heliads]

Hi! Hope I’m not too late, could I request a Derek Hale x reader where she (already knowing ab the supernatural) gets tired of Derek constantly disappearing from her life whenever he does that Derek thing until finally she’s fed up with it being the one to disappear this time idk how to end it or go from there but I was thinking of an angsty hurt/comfort with a happy ending🥺! Hope it’s enough, thank you!!

'the one who leaves ' - derek hale

masterlist

The hardest part of both being a werewolf and knowing a werewolf is, and will always be, the horrors. The attacks that never cease, the blood always shed. The second hardest part is the strain of being with someone whose life is always in jeopardy purely because of who they are. Although it doesn’t feel nearly as important as the constant threat of hunters, or the latest monster to decide that Beacon Hills should be its new domain, sometimes you swear the second part hangs even more heavily about your heart than the first. Then again, maybe that’s just because of Derek Hale.

Derek is one of the most complicated players on the supernatural chess board. You met him what feels like a lifetime ago, when one of seemingly dozens of supernatural attacks had threatened the lives of Beacon Hills citizens. Derek had saved your life. A month later, you’d saved him from some hunters. The back-and-forth of life saving went on and on until the two of you decided you were better as friends than people a little too important to each other to be acquaintances, and then the boundaries were shifted again when you started dating.

Sometimes, though, on rough nights after long fights and darker ones when you haven’t seen Derek in weeks and he doesn’t seem all that inclined to answer your texts or voicemails, you start to think that entering into a relationship with you is one of Derek’s biggest regrets. It’s not that he doesn’t care for you; Derek has assured you many times over that his feelings for you are stronger even than his loyalties to his pack, his commitment to killing the hunters responsible for the Hale House fire, yet the problem remains.

Derek is all too familiar with the struggle of having a weakness. When his ancestral home burned down with most of his family trapped inside, he learned for the first time that sometimes a mortal blow capable of destroying his life doesn’t have to threaten him specifically. When he loves someone so much that he prioritizes their safety above his own, Derek creates a weakness that hunters and other supernaturals can exploit. He would never forgive himself if you were hurt as a tool to get to him, so Derek has been doing his best to limit the fallout of any supernatural fight onto you.

However, this only seems to drive the two of you apart. Yes, by not being seen in public as often anymore, Derek lowers the possibility that a hunter would try to kidnap you as a hostage, but it also means that you see him less and less frequently. When you do finally manage to meet up, after thoroughly checking to make sure you haven’t been tailed, and only after dark in one of your houses, you’re both exhausted, wrung dry of the same life and spirit that had brought the two of you together in the first place.

It’s not the same anymore. You hate to admit it, but it’s true. Loving Derek is no longer the beautiful victory it had always been. Instead, you feel as if you’ve lost the war. Derek isn’t yours anymore. If he was, you wouldn’t have to hide what the two of you share, you wouldn’t have to constantly stare at the long list of missed calls on your phone and wonder when he’ll ever pick up, if he even wants to anymore. Derek is doing a great job at keeping you safe, but somewhere along the line, the two of you got your priorities mixed up. Now you’re alone and he’s alive, and you don’t know that you’re any happier about it than you would have been if one of you were lost to the hunters.

At this point, why try? Why even bother with the pretense of maintaining the ruse? The two of you might as well not even be together at all. It doesn’t feel like you are, certainly, when you go so long in between visits. Even when the two of you are finally face to face, Derek is harried and brief, hardly staying longer than a few hours before rushing off again, never to be seen for another few months.

It wears away at you like a river at a stone. Your sharp edges, the ones that pierced through his shell so easily at the beginning of it all, have been smoothed to nothingness. Each of your attempts to break through to Derek and coax him into staying even a little longer are brushed off with simple excuses. It’s like you don’t even exist to him anymore.

Fine. Fine. If you’re not a person to him anymore, he will not be a person to you. You pack up your things and leave Beacon Hills early one morning, only telling Scott McCall and Deaton over at the vet so they can contact you if need be. You don’t say a word about your absence to Derek. Why bother? He’s not even in town, hasn’t been for months. When he comes back– if he attempts to come back at all– he can ask one of his friends and hear the same answer that he would from you right now. There’s no point in wasting either of your time any longer.

You’re still engaged in fighting the good fight against the supernatural. Deaton is a longtime friend of yours, and he’d been hearing rumors of a peculiarity a couple of states over. He couldn’t afford to leave Beacon Hills for an extended period of time, being so important to the town as one of its last defenders, so you offered to go instead. It would be good for you, you said. The trip. Being able to clear your head.

Odds are, Deaton had been able to see through that excuse as he has many of your others all throughout your life, but he had just nodded and said that he was grateful for your help. With that, you left town. You’ve been in Beacon Hills for your entire life, excluding brief excursions in the name of school or work or family trips. Never before have you left like this, not entirely sure if you would ever come back, uncertain that the person you love most of all would be there to want you to return.

At first, the trip feels like a terror. Then you roll down the windows and let the early morning light touch your face with soft, bright fingers; then the breeze cools your face, running over your skin in loose circles; then you start to breathe at last, for the first time in what feels like years. Then you remember that you are still a person worth saving, and maybe even if Derek Hale cannot do that, you can save yourself by leaving.

The miles pass by in moments. You’re long gone by the time anyone starts waking up. Scott knew that you were leaving and told the other teenagers in his pack so they wouldn’t freak out, but he still texts you anyway. Hope you find what you’re looking for.

So do I, you message him back at a red light. Stay safe.

Thanks, he responds, then no more.

You end up in the state of your choice by the middle of the afternoon, booking a room at a hotel so you can have a home base while properly surveying the area. You don’t have a supernatural’s knack for telling when something is wrong, but the hairs on the back of your neck prickle anyway, letting you know that the currents of the wind around this city have a magical edge, a certain element that sets them aside from a normal town. Good. You could use something fantastical and uncommon.

You don’t know when you expect to hear back from Derek. Never, maybe. You had assumed that he wouldn’t try to reach out to you until he got back, which might be anywhere from a few months from now to never. Once he returned to Beacon Hills, Derek could hear from Scott as to why you weren’t there anymore. You and Derek hardly spoke at all anymore, except out of an obligation to make sure you were still alive. He probably wouldn’t care at all.

Yet not a week has gone by before you start getting frantic texts from Derek.

Y/N. You in town?

Why is your house empty?

Scott tells me you left town. Why didn’t you tell me?

Y/N. Please text back. I’m getting worried.

Three missed calls.

Please pick up, sweetheart. I’ll drive over there myself if I have to. Just tell me you’re alive.

You stare at the notifications for a long time, reveling in how they build in intensity, then tap out a message of your own at last:  I’m alive and well.

Derek immediately responds. And you didn’t tell me you were going?

The bright glow of your phone dulls your senses. Nothing feels right, but nothing feels wrong anymore. Loving Derek used to make you feel invincible. Now, you’re just tired, and wishing this exchange would end.

Didn’t think I would have to. You’ve been away for months, and you never tell me when you’re going. Why should I?

Derek doesn’t like that at all. It’s different with me, sweetheart. You know that.

You don’t bother to grace that with a response. Setting your phone on ‘do not disturb,’ you shove the device back in your pocket. It’s good that Derek is unhappy with this turn of events, you decide. For once, he should be the one panicking when he wakes up alone, when he wants to be with the person he loves only for them to disappear without a trace. Why should it be you all the time?

You carry on with your task. As it turns out, the case at hand, the utter unraveling of the supernatural presence in this town, is due to an overactive ancient curse on the town. Deaton talks you through how to shut it down, and once the job is done, you return home, proud of yourself and your accomplishments.

You’re fully expecting Derek to have left town again by the time you got back. He’s been messaging you non stop, but you’ve been leaving most of those messages on ‘unread’ since they all say pretty much the same things:  why wouldn’t you tell me you were going, are you alright, come back ASAP. You message back occasionally to assure him that you’re still alive, but mainly, you think a bit of silence would do the both of you some good.

After arriving back at Beacon Hills, you stop by your house to drop off your belongings before visiting Deaton to debrief. He’s glad to hear of your success, but once both of you have ensured that the town was handled accordingly, he breaks protocol to talk about your personal life instead.

“I think you should talk to Derek Hale,” he says uneasily.

You frown at him. “What?”

Deaton glances around to make sure no customers can overhear you, then continues on. “He’s been a wreck ever since you left. He keeps stopping by the shop to demand information from me. He insisted for a long time that I give him the name of the town you were visiting so he could check on you himself, but I kept it from him because I thought you would need to focus.”

“That was the right call,” you assure him. It would, after all, have been more difficult to juggle both an errant curse and a supremely ticked off boyfriend.

Deaton chuckles good-naturedly. “That was what I had assumed. I would still recommend talking to him, though. These sorts of conflicts are best handled sooner rather than later.”

You nod your agreement, and, after talking a few minutes longer, head out towards Derek’s apartment complex. Although you’ve felt bitterly triumphant in the fact that Derek now knows what it’s like to miss somebody like you’ve been missing him, you fell in love with him for a reason, and that reason was that you liked being around him more than you did with anyone else. You still love him, even if the two of you have been on the fringe of an argument for a while now.

That’s what drives you to his building, what carries you up the interminably long elevator ride, what brings you to knock twice on his door and wait until a quiet voice from inside announces that the door is unlocked.

That’s the first sign that something is wrong. Derek never leaves the door unlocked. Some could call it an overwhelming concern for safety, or just plain paranoia, but Derek’s experienced enough tragedy in his life to go overboard in making sure that he keeps all potential avenues of risk firmly blocked off. The fact that the door is unlocked disquiets you more than you like to admit.

Slowly, carefully, you push the door open. Immediately, you’re struck by the gloomy atmosphere of the place. Derek pulled the curtains over the wide windows of his apartment, making the whole place darker and more lifeless than usual. The lights are off. You can assume that Derek can see thanks to his werewolf senses without needing the fluorescents, but for your human eyes, the whole place just seems as dark and grave as a crypt.

“Derek?” You call out hesitantly.

Silence. Then, a husky voice from the back. “Y/N? Is that you?”

You still can’t see him in the gloom, so you cross the apartment to open the blinds on the large windows, hoping to toss some light on the situation. You know the layout of the place from memory, so many visits here help to solidify your knowledge of each piece of furniture in the apartment. Still, you’re not expecting to see Derek crumpled in a chair on the corner, looking significantly the worse for wear.

You’re at his side in an instant. “Derek? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” he says listlessly. “Not like you knew a thing about that, though, disappearing like that.”

Your concern for him starts to fade away, replaced instead by a burning irritation. “So that’s what all of this is about? You’re so hurt that I was the one to leave that you’ve become comatose?”

Derek sits up a little, eyes flashing. “You vanished without a trace and didn’t tell me where you went. I thought you were dead, Y/N. I had to pry information out of Deaton so I even knew you were alive, and when I tried to contact you, you ignored my messages. What the hell was I supposed to think?”

You laugh, although it’s not a happy sound. “Finally, you understand. This is what I deal with every time you leave town, Derek. You never tell me where you’re going or what you’re doing. I sat here in Beacon Hills for months, wondering if you’ll ever come back. I was gone for half the time you usually are and yet it’s far too much for you to handle. How do you think I feel?”

Derek’s lips flatten. “I– I didn’t realize you took it like that. I was just trying to keep you safe. You know how the hunters watch me, and–”

You cut him off, feeling the anger coiling through your stomach. “I know that, Derek. I know that every supernatural in your life that isn’t a part of your pack wants you dead. I know that in your head, this is how you keep me safe, by constantly cutting me out of your life, but has it occurred to you that this isn’t what I want? You could have asked me if this was the way to handle it. If you had even talked to me at all, I would have told you that I don’t care about being safe. Not if it means we’re like this. Not if it means I don’t get to have you at all.”

Derek stands up slowly, until he’s hovering just a few breaths away from you. One of his hands reaches up to cradle your cheek. “I never wanted to hurt you,” he whispers. “I’ve lost so many people in my life. I can’t lose you, too.”

“I know,” you murmur back. “But if you keep going on like this, if you keep pushing me away, you’ll lose me anyway.”

He flinches. “I should have asked you,” he admits. “I can’t erase the past, Y/N, but I can apologize for the present. Will you forgive me?”

“Only if you stay with me,” you answer him.

A ghost of a smile plays upon his lips. “I’ve never had a problem with that. It hurts like hell, leaving you. Always.”

“Then don’t do it anymore,” you urge him. “Stay with me, Derek. Keep me safe by staying with me.”

“I will,” Derek promises.

People in love make a lot of promises. Some are kept, some are broken. Some are forgotten about entirely. Looking at Derek in this half-darkness, though, you have a feeling that this one will be cherished for quite a long time indeed.

teen wolf tag list: @mayfieldss, @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @rafecameronswhore, @bellabadacadabra, @watchreadfangirlrepeat, @23victoria

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[leejenowrld]

across all your jeno fics, in your eyes, mfal, after all this time, jeno is characterised in similar ways. i wanted to ask is there a particular reason? and i wanted to ask, what would you consider his flaws to be? (the jeno portrayed in your works)

jeno’s characterization across ‘in your eyes,’ ‘my first and last,’ and ‘after all this time’ has a consistent persona because i’ve always found it easy and fitting to portray him as a confident, assertive, intelligent and dominant man. but with underlying layers of vulnerability, softness and emotional depth. in my fics, jeno is always deeply attuned to his partner’s needs, often understanding what you want without needing to be told. he’s naturally a people pleaser, but it’s never out of obligation—it’s because he genuinely wants the reader to feel like you’re his priority. whether it’s emotional support, physical care, or sexual pleasure, jeno’s focus is always on giving. he’s a natural leader, guiding the relationship with kindness and attentiveness, and he’s a provider who makes sure his partner feels safe, cherished, and deeply satisfied at all times. he will go down on you if it’s what you need, he will hold you and comfort you when you cry in his arms, he will silently help you out by doing your chores and cooking for you, it’s his love language.

sexually, jeno often takes control in my fics. i’m a firm believer of hard dom jeno. whether through rough, fast-paced sex or teasing dominance. he knows exactly what he wants and isn’t shy about making that clear. he’s cocky in bed, constantly praising the reader, teasing you, and pushing your limits. this assertiveness works well in his relationships because, despite his strong sexual presence, there’s always an element of care and emotional connection. not only is he using his dominance to control; it’s also a way to deepen the bond between him and the reader. the tension between his confidence and the moments where he shows vulnerability, when he’s fully present and giving himself emotionally, is what makes his character so fitting and so important. it’s like he’s dominant because he knows the reader trusts him, and that trust brings out his softer side.

as for his flaws, jeno’s bluntness and straightforwardness can sometimes come across as too harsh or confrontational. while his honesty is refreshing, he doesn’t always filter his words, which can unintentionally hurt others. his passion, while admirable, can be overwhelming. he cares deeply, but that intensity can make him too forceful in certain situations, leading to arguments or tension. his strong emotions sometimes drive him to act before thinking, especially when it comes to protecting or defending his partner, making him seem too rigid or uncompromising.

his cocky, dominant nature is sexy and fits well with the intense, passion-driven relationships i’ve written, but it also leaves room for growth, showing that while he’s confident on the surface, he still has areas where he needs to learn how to open up emotionally and let go of his need for control. this adds complexity to his character, making him more than just a one-dimensional dominant figure. he’s multifaceted, driven by a desire to both protect and possess, while also being scared of fully revealing his vulnerable side.

sometimes, jeno is confused about what he actually wants versus what he feels like he should want. as seen in ‘in your eyes’, he often acts based on external expectations rather than following his heart. this conflict means he doesn’t always prioritize his own needs or feelings, which leads him to make choices that aren’t aligned with who he really is. he’s incredibly intense in everything—whether it’s communication, sex, drugs, alcohol, or his dedication to his studies and gym—his all-or-nothing mindset can push him to extremes, making balance difficult. this intensity, while admirable, can be overwhelming, leading him to burnout or making decisions driven by impulse rather than thought. it makes him susceptible to emotional stress, and his tendency to bottle things up adds to this internal conflict.

i fucking loved writing this and delving info jeno

[gffa]

I would love your Legends recs!!! I've tried getting into Legends before but the books I'd randomly pick up would just seem off somehow & I couldn't really get into them (which might be my fault for buying whatever star wars thing I saw because it had clones on the cover)

But that was before I knew the difference between Canon and Legends and what not so I think I might be less confused by all the continuity stuff now (hopefully) & I would love to give them another go. I've been recommended the Kenobi book before, have you read it? Which ones are your favorites?

Hi! I'm not as well-versed in the Legends books, as I've prioritized the Disney continuity ones, because I only have so much time to also get through all the documentaries and reference books and watching the shows and reading the comics and reading fic and having fun in fandom, etc. And with decreasing amounts of free time, it just hasn't been a priority! That said, generally I like Karen Miller's books, which do fall into the attachment = love thing sometimes, but other than that her id aligns with my id like 90% of the way, because her Obi-Wan & Anakin (&Ahsoka) writing is fantastically fun. The Kenobi book is solidly fun from what I remember of it (I think I got halfway through and thought it was fine!), anything by Matthew Stover is worth picking up (the ROTS novelization and Shatterpoint as a Mace novel), and James Luceno's books are generally a solid start. (Dark Lord is probably the one to start with or else Labyrinth of Evil.) The other film novelizations are a mixed bag (and often leave that feeling of something being kind of "off"), the Jedi Apprentice/Jedi Quest books are worth reading just to understand where a lot of plot elements came from, but they're very much aimed at a young audience, so the drama and artistic license is dialed up to eleven (because kids want to read about other kids having exciting adventures, not adults taking care of things before they happen XD), etc. AVOID Karen Traviss' books, like set aside the anti-Jedi stuff (which is still pretty awful), I've seen soooo many people tear those books apart for just how badly written they are because she can't get out of her own bias. If anyone else has some prequels-era Legends books to recommend, please feel free!

[taurusreads]

what do you need to know right now? 🤎

masterlist || paid services || ko-fi

what does spirit want to tell you?

pile one

overall energy: ten of pentacles

for some of you i see that you may be struggling with your own thoughts a bit. the cards were being very sporadic and many of them were flying out at the same time. i think some of you might have a tendency to shut down when there’s a lot going on, like your beak. just kind of shuts off and it feels like a “no thoughts head empty” kind of vibe. spirit wants you to know that it’s perfectly fine for you to take time for yourself. focus on your mental health, and do what needs to be done for yourself before going to help someone else. you can never be the shoulder to someone until you can take care of your own well-being.

i also think that some of you have projects going on regarding your career. be very selective with who you give information to, as not everyone is your friend. sometimes it’s better to keep the information you have to yourself rather than telling others about it, because some people may not always have your best interest at heart. i see that this is something important to a lot of you, something that you’ve been manifesting for a long time. im hearing “dream come true”. these things were brought to you by the universe because you asked for it, waited patiently, and put in the effort to receive it, don’t let someone pretending to be your friend interfere with that.

on the same note of your work/career life, try not to overwork yourself! it’s great to love what you do, and it’s amazing to want to do it all the time, but make sure that you’re not pushing yourself past your limits. everyone has a breaking point, a moment in time where everything becomes too much and it takes a toll on you mentally, emotionally, physically, or spiritually. take time out of every day to check on your own health, and give yourself the love that you deserve!

channeled messages: headache, work, fashion, warm weather, yellow, 555, celebration, milestones, manifestations, something about being in the dark, secrets, self care, bubble baths!

pile two

overall energy: the star

there’s a lot of things that this pile wants to do, but you feel like there’s not enough time to get it all done. spirit wants you to remember that life is a marathon, not a sprint. you have ample time to do the things that you want in life, so don’t beat yourself up too much! there’s also a message of balancing out your work and home life. it’s okay to want to prioritize things, but make sure you have room in your life for the rest of it too! there’s plenty of time to figure out your career/life plans, so make sure that you give yourself time to have fun also! go bowling, see a movie, or just stay inside and stare at the tv. whatever makes you feel good should also be on your list of priorities.

i also see that for some of you, you’ve been wanting to get into a relationship. spirit is saying that healthy relationships stem from people who are emotionally and mentally ready, and sometimes it’s okay to admit that you’re not ready. being able to understand when you’re ready for a relationship and when you should just focus on yourself is an amazing strength to have, and it can save you from a lot of unfortunate situations in the future. spirit wants to make sure that you can discern when you are and are not ready for love, so you can focus on the things that are really important to you.

i think now would be an important time to focus on your work. focus on establishing yourself in the career you’re currently in, and completely immerse yourself in doing what you love. im also getting the message that some of you might possibly have a particular interest with someone that you work with. look within yourself to truly know whether you are ready for any sort of relationship, or if you should just focus on your own well-being. and be honest with yourself! no growth happens by ignoring the truth.

channeled messages: retail, D.D.D - the boyz, kpop, literal dancing, heartbreak, partnership, music, connection, dreams, soulmate, patience

pile three

overall energy: knight of wands rx

let out your inner child! some of you have been wanting to do something new for a while now, and spirit says go for it! if there was anything that you’d been wanting to try, some place that you’d been wanting to go, take a leap of faith and try it out! it’s never too late to do something new, life is all about making new memories and experiencing new things. i feel like some of you haven’t had the time to do things that you’ve wanted to, any i think now is the time to make room for it!

if some of you are in school, use your free time very wisely. you get a couple months out of school, so take the free time to experience all the things you didn’t have time to before. for anyone who is working, if you’ve been considering taking time off, do it if you can! spirit wants you to start trusting your instincts more. we all have intuition, some peoples are just stronger because they use trust in it and use it more often! trust in your own intuition and follow what your gut is telling you to do! you’re not missing out if you take the time to do what you want, nor are you lazy or a fraud. you deserve to take time to yourself, just like everyone else does.

if you’ve been cooped up in the house for a while, spirit always says to go outside for a little bit! i think interacting with nature can be very healing for some of you. take a walk, go for a run, or just enjoy the scene of nature! im seeing a lot of green, a lot of trees and grass, as well as a park/playground. maybe some of you have kids, or this is something that you like to do! go outside and do the things you used to do as a kid, and reignite that spark within you!

channeled messages: games, sun, playground, recreational parks, soccer, running, exercise, listening to music while walking, tanning, vacation, happiness, relaxation, 333, laughing, joy

[lgbtlunaverse]

In terms of what the mdzs novel ending leaves open and unresolved i don't think we talk about lan wangji enough.

Like. This is not lwj slander I love him but the novel pretty clearly sets it up that Xichen takes care of wangji more than the reverse. It makes sense, he's the older sibling after all. But lwj, for the rest of the story, is very much a guy whose priorities are wwx first wwx second and MAYBE you get to take third place if you're lucky. And he mourned Wei Wuxian for 13 years!! And he finally has him back! Of COURSE that's what he's gonna be like. But then as they settle into domestic bliss you see him have this uncomfortable realization that his older brother's been going through an incredibly difficult time, one reminiscent of the one he went through that his brother stood unflinchingly by his side for, and he... just wasn't there. He didn't even think about it, the realization only comes months later.

And to me that looks a lot like potential setup for a mini arc postcanon where lwj relearns how to care about and prioritize things and people that are not Wei Wuxian, a thing he can do now precisely because Wei Ying is safe and securely by his side.

With wei wuxian it's very clear for a reader to see that he has not wrapped things up with Jiang Cheng yet, he's got a burgeoning relationship with Jin Ling he'll want to work on, as well as catching up to do with Sizhui and Wen Ning once those two are done with their own little trip. He's a people person and that means he thrives when he's got lots of people he cares about around him! But lwj has spent the rest of the story in his "me and wei ying against the world" mentality and that ending sort of feels like a wake up call that maybe... it's not like that anymore? Not for everyone at least. There might be place for other people, too.

[edenfenixblogs]

"Night" is Free if You're an Audible Subscriber

A lot of people's only experience with learning about the Holocaust is Anne Frank's Diary or works of fiction.

Anyone speaking about i/p right now NEEDS to read this first person account of life in a concentration camp.

There is a right way and a wrong way to read this book.

The right way: Sit with the uncomfortable feeling that non-Jewish people did this to Jews. Not just Germans and not just Nazis. The European leaders who aligned with Hitler and fought with him did this. The Russians who distributed and popularized the antisemitic conspiracy theories which informed much of Europe's Jew hatred at the time did this. The neighbors who sat back and watched as government officials carted off people they knew and saw every day or shot them in the streets and buried them in mass graves. The ones who convinced themselves they were good people simply because they didn't pull the trigger or operate a gas chamber. The citizens of nations of the Allied powers who turned away Jewish refugees from Europe. The Nazi sympathizers in the US. The vast ,expansive hatred against Jews that prevented anyone from intervening on our behalf.

Sit with the fact that nobody intervened to protect Jews, ever. The Allied powers intervened to stop German expansionism, not to protect Jews. They did not fight in WWII to protect Jews. That any Jews survived at all is a miracle. The fact that the camps were liberated at all is a miracle. Because it wasn't a goal. It wasn't something that people were fighting to achieve. That's what people don't seem to understand.

Killing Jews WASN'T the thing that the Allied powers had a problem with.

Plenty of Americans and Europeans from Allied nations thought it sure was a shame that Hitler was so aggressively expansionist, because he had some great ideas about how to kill all those Jews.

And unless you're Jewish, there is the extremely uncomfortable but likely chance that someone you loved was pretty OK with killing my family.

Or, at the very least, that someone killing my family was not something they had the emotional capacity or willingness to engage with. Think about what that does to my trust for YOU. And if you don't think that someone you loved passed on that apathy and antisemitism to you, then you're naive.

The only correct way for a non-Jew to read this book is to sit with who they are as people and think about how they treat Jews and try to empathize with how this indescribable tragedy affected and continues to affect Jews worldwide.

If you have never read this book, I want you to think long and hard about how absolutely terrifying it is for Jewish people that, I, a Jewish woman, have to BEG non-Jews to read it. Because your education system failed you. And because Jews are afraid that YOUR BEHAVIOR WILL DO THIS TO US AGAIN.

The wrong way: Making this true memoir about living through an industrialized genocide about ANYTHING other than antisemitism and antisemitic apathy. You don't get to use it to draw parallels to other atrocities or wars or people. At least not during/while processing your first reading of this book. Why? Because until you sit with your own internalized antisemitism, where and who it came from, and are willing to confront your own hate toward us, then you are missing the point. The point is that people can convince themselves they are good and that they care about their fellow humans and they can have empathy for everyone except Jews. Sure, they might think it's sad that bad things keep happening to Jews. But it never really seems to be the priority, does it? It never seems to be a pressing enough issue to be worth addressing. There's always something more important happening.

That's antisemitic thinking too. You do, actually, need to prioritize dismantling your antisemitism in order to, you know, dismantle it. Just because you don't sit around daydreaming about Hitler doesn't mean you're not antisemitism. Ignoring us is part of your antisemitism--one of the most damaging and intrinsic parts of antisemitism actually. The Holocaust did not happen because most people hated Jew enough to kill us. The Holocaust happened because a bunch of people didn't care enough Jews to stop the people who DID want to harm us.

If you can't think of the last time you tried to unlearn something antisemitic within yourself, then people like you are why the Holocaust happened. If you have had to tune out Jewish pain because it feels like a "distraction," then people like you are why the Holocaust happened. If your reaction to reading this is to feel some kind of righteous anger that I've called you a bad person because you have proof you care about other people, then you are the kind of person who allowed the Holocaust to happen. And you're also wrong.

Because I'm not calling you a bad person. I'm calling you a flawed person who has the ability to fix a flaw that has the potential to harm others. I'm not asking you to care about other, non-Jewish, people. And I'm not asking you to STOP caring about the non-Jewish people you care about.

What I am saying is that claiming that you care about Jewish people is not the same as actually caring about us.

I'm asking you to sit and read this book and to remember that it is about JEWISH PAIN and a JEWISH TRAGEDY that happened to JEWISH PEOPLE. You need to actually devote time to caring about Jewish people, because society never taught you how to do that, and it has no infrastructure built to help you do that. Because antisemitism is baked into the infrastructure itself. Take the time. Read the book. Let Jewish pain be about Jewish people. Let us own our own tragedy. Do not take it from us to apply to other situations. ESPECIALLY not when the actual original situation was something that nobody cared about enough to prevent.

Understand this: If you're not Jewish, there is no way I can explain to you how painful it is to watch people be so invested in likening every terrible thing that happens to any other group of people to the Holocaust, when those same people never actually first tried caring about the Holocaust and the people it actually happened to.

[a-d-nox]

it is my birthday tomorrow: so let's review the predictions i made last year based on my solar return chart

about a year ago, i made a predictions post for my year ahead and now here i am updating y'all with what actually happened as i previously suggested that i would! so let's jump into it - i pasted all my previous predictions in to this post for your reading ease!

1H IN LIBRA AT 12° (contains: scorpio sun and narcissus (37117))

prediction: there is likely to be a relational focus this year and with venus (the house ruler) in the 12h it is likely to be with myself (what us my relationship with my self? how can i better treat myself? etc). my diplomacy skills are likely not going to be the best as i look at the 10h/11h, what is sitting in those houses, and that pisces degree on my 1h... with my scorpio sun present in the house, it is likely that it will be obvious that i trust no one this year (people may suspect that i only trust myself - they could feel as though i look down on them or think little of them). my sun is opposite my moon so i might feel a bit disconnected from myself... with my sun in the 1h, i will likely have a super intense vibe (not that i don't already) but in a way that seems like magnetism because it is a libra 1h? like drawing others in? i do feel like this year is going to be the sort where i am discovering who i am and who i want to be (i just have to make sure it doesn't get out of hand with the sun and narcissus (especially with his conjunction to my sun, mercury, and mars) present).

reality: i still do need to make my relationship with myself better. but it has become very apparent that i need to do so this year. i have been prioritizing things that i don't really care about more than those things i do care about. like money. the focus on money this year is really starting to annoy me can't wait to move on to something else... making money and job related stuff has taken priority over my health, my friends, my family, etc. and making a hobby into a business / job / side hustle has really annoyed me this year because i use to really enjoy doing this but i am starting to really hate it. and it truly is taking up a lot of my time. i work a full time job - i am there 45 hours a week only to come home write posts or readings for another 10 hours a week - that might sound like nothing but its really not in the grand scheme because i am starting to get older and realize that everything is a trade off. that's 10 hours i didn't exercise, i didn't see family, i didn't see friends, etc. and part of that is because i don't appreciate myself the way i should. your 20s are really precious - you are your healthiest, most free, etc. and i am spending it on fleeting things. it is possible one day i could wake up and everything i have done here won't matter - it's immaterial it could just fade into cyberspace. just like my job one day i could wake up and unknowingly it will be my last - the world of technology is ever changing. things are moving faster than ever before and i find myself cling to things locking in while everything around me goes miles a minute. change is happening and i am not letting myself go with it. i want to be my best self - which is a practice i preach to everyone but myself. that being things might evolve here as well as i try my best to live and do so authentically in the coming year.

2H IN SCORPIO AT 9° (contains: scorpio mercury, mars, and kassandra (114) AND sagittarius educatio (2440) and pythia (432))

prediction: what an interesting mix of stuff i have here... money makes the world go round this year i guess. my mercury is at 9° and my mars is at 11° - can i just cry a little...? bro wtf is bitcoin and why do i feel like i am gonna get into the world of online investing...? the coupling of these two planets (especially mars as the 2h ruler) makes me feel as though i will be making money and spending it or moving it relatively quick so that i can't use it? i say "i can't use it" because my mars opposes jupiter which makes me think of compounding interest like a CD... anywho, i am a money wizard? i have kassandra and pythia here, so i feel like i will probably make investments and use my money in unexpected ways (kassandra makes me think of emergency funds OR bad financial contracts though). i also have educatio here so at least i will be learning more about financial literacy plus i do think with mercury i will be extremely interested in learning more about finances. and with mars... it might just become a new passion of mine... aside from money, while i am likely to continue a lot of giving and receiving of knowledge this next year on social media (mercury things), there is a danger to the realm of social media... ESPECIALLY with mars present and both mercury and mars conjunct my sun then all three opposing jupiter... my self worth could take a hit which i do not look forward to.

reality: thank god i didn't touch bitcoin that can stay far far away from me. but yep investing has never been so hard core this year i am walking out of this cycle with a 401k (that has a company match), a new CD, a credit card, and a quarterly bonus type of job. i corporate girlied hard. and on top of that i have done over 100 paid readings this year. i think learning about money is very important in today's world with inflation, social politics, etc the way it is. i will continue to learn about it but i am going to stop pressuring myself as much to make a set amount here especially. also i am going to be VERY careful what influencers (idk any 23 year olds making 6 figures in real life but social media appears to be full of them) i watch because some of them are extremists and not at all realistic... some of the content is good be some of it can be very delulu - my boss told me that a person from my generation came in fresh from college asking for more than even she makes... we have to be for real while also playing the game. i have had a 51.16% increase in income in comparison to where i was at when wrote my predictions last year at this time. so trust me when i say slow and steady wins the race when the job market is the way it is.

3H IN SAGITTARIUS AT 10° (contains: sagittarius ambrosia (193), asclepius (4581), cupido (763), jormungandr (471926) rx, lev tolstoj (2810), and zeus (5731) AND capricorn aphrodite (1388) and chekhov (2369))

prediction: sagittarius and 10° for the 3h is giving "it's all fun and games until someone says/mentions ____". i have to be mindful of my mouth because while i am likely to make people feel alive with my words given ambrosia and asclepius in this house, i also have chekhov (where you want simplicity but receive drama), aphrodite, and jormungandr (where people try to end you - aka getting socially outcasted/cancelled) in the 3h... but lev tolstoj is here too so whatever i am saying that offends others or makes them mad is facts even though there is drama/gossip involved when i do say these things... the dangers of social media part 2? i feel like it may be romantic drama because zeus (i am not a zeus person because there are no aspects to the sun or asc - only a square is made from this asteroid to my venus), cupido, and aphrodite (and for aphrodite there are no aspects made to my inner planets this solar return - so it is definitely not me doing something sus like cheating) are here in the house too. i do have my suspicions as to what is happening already... and oh shiiii will it hurt because 10° is always a bit painful in my opinion. especially with the house ruler in the 8h... it just looks like emotional damage...

reality: when i tell you things that i have said were often misinterpreted or took negatively - i am not joking. i was messing with my boss and i was saying how no one has been using the form and i joked that we should make a new motto "no form, no fulfillment" and she snapped at me "thats a shitty way to do business". i didnt think i said it in a serious manner or anything but its been little things like that all year. me and my big mouth need to learn the power of silence again. and yes there was some romantic drama like the boy from last year calling me out of the blue to tell me he is planning to break up with his girlfriend... like okay? why are you calling me now after basically a year of not communicating with me? also don't bother me when you are with someone, boy. that's what he is too - a boy - because no man would play this type of game. like grow tf up. but alas of course it hurt my feelings because it sort of was flirty and it seemed like he was vetting me out for a potential hookup... it hurt me to hear how little he values me and how little he valued what he started with me to think that a hook up was all that i would be worth and desire.

4H IN CAPRICORN AT 14° (contains: capricorn pluto, balder (4059), and bellerophon (1808)

prediction: a lot of my astro friends who see this chart are like "oh are you moving?" and i am like ABSOLUTELY NOT. like i literally just moved so no. unfortunately (i hate to be this person) i do believe a beloved family member (4h balder conjunct pluto and square moon) will be passing this year. even more unfortunate - i do not think it will be an easy death with bellerophon present because he was thrown from pegasus... and not to be super disgusting, but i do believe i will inherit something expensive and very material given the earthy grand trine formed by pluto, venus, and uranus. that being said i feel like i might neglect my mental health because pluto squares my moon - i might stopping going to therapy (currently i see a therapist regarding my childhood ptsd). i might regress into people pleasing behaviors because it is all that i will be able to control if someone in my family passes... which is not the healthiest for me.

reality: i didn't move! yay thank god cause who has the energy! but the family dog did die this february... i picked her out and everything. so it was sad but she was 15 - she lived a very good life. my grandfather is still heartbroken... its very depressing. my mom had to go to the vet to put her down... but i know she was loved and now she is no longer in pain her last months she couldn't get on the couch, she struggled with having energy, wore a doggie diaper, etc. it was her time. switching gears. i have been neglecting and ignoring my mental health a lot lately just because i don't really have the energy or "time" to take care of it...

5H IN AQUARIUS AT 17° (contains: pisces saturn, amor (1221) rx, and karma (3811))

prediction: this seems like a good mix for me achieving something big with writing/blogging. especially because saturn is the traditional ruler of aquarius and capricorn (which is home - the work i do from home, a side hustle). my outlook for romance is not too good with amor in retrograde in this house nor with freedom loving aquarius ruling this house. not to mention i feel like the world will be showing me something that will cause me to have a grudge against love (saturn) and karma will be dished out. this could also be a sign that my childhood trauma could be triggered again with saturn in the 5h too (great).

reality: my goal was to reach 3k and at this point in time we are almost at 5k here. so goal reached! also unexpected but related i have a project i have been working on for over a year and it complete! which definitely is a 5h pisces saturn moment. but yes i was single the whole damn year. i think the grudge i have about love has a lot to do with my situation reappearing after a year of no conversation despite him saying we are just friends only to tell me he is going to break up with his girlfriend... but he really loves her. if you love her why are you talking to me and why are you calling me basically plotting the break up - it was icky to me... and honestly turned my stomach about love.

project: sunset cross stitch.

6H IN PISCES AT 17° (contains: pisces neptune rx, AND aries heracles (5143) rx and salacia (120347) rx)

prediction: i appreciate the that neptune is retrograde in this pisces house... last thing i wanted was for my health, routine, or hygiene to be confusing/frustrating, avoided, or to constantly be behind / running late / neglected. so this is fine by me. i might be obsessive with scheduling, health, and hygiene because jupiter (this house's other ruler) is in the 8h. it seems like the job hunt is at a standstill with heracles in retrograde - instead, i might get one great option that i take and stick to with given salacia in retrograde.

reality: i actually revamped my google calendar at the beginning of my 23rd year. i am now taking vitamins out of a pill box of all things like an old woman. and i am focusing on my hair health! i sleep with a bonnet on because i am a hard sleeper and its changing the fact that use to have tension breakage. i also am getting into hair oiling! and i did find a job in marketing after not having a lot of luck. so it only takes one person to say yes is very real.

7H IN ARIES AT 12° (contains: aries nn, chiron rx, part of fortune, pandora (55) rx, and signe (459) rx AND taurus moon and vertex)

prediction: it's a toss up as to what all this could mean. i could find myself in a very emotionally charged connection (this is the eclipse moon after all) - with chiron rx it could be the healing of past wounds. the combination of vertex, part of fortune, and north node dictates that any relationship/partnership i find myself in could be extremely significant. with pandora here i feel like it might be unexpected where this relationship will come from. WITH SIGNE HERE i feel like some people may look down on who this person is...

reality: i can officially say i am over my situationship i couldn't say that a year ago - i was too shocked that he cut me off cold turkey and started dating someone knew after telling me many time he didn't want to date anyone. but unexpectedly i did mean some really cool friends who i really get along with so that was very good this year.

8H IN TAURUS AT 9° (contains: taurus jupiter rx and uranus rx)

prediction: oof not my 8h ruler in the 12h - what's that screaming i hear lol? maybe i will be afraid of change - i mean that because of the 12h venus and jupiter retrograde... the combination doesn't really express embracing change and the unknown, you know? the uranus retrograde makes me think i will be moving away from shared finances and working on managing my own money. i definitely believe it is for the best that i keep my opportunities to myself... i don't get the sense people will be supportive of my wins - i more so sense the envy of others from this house. i don't think i will be shocked by my successes, but i feel like others will not see it coming...

reality: i really wrote that and this year can to understand its true - i fear change and i live small because of it and i 100% make my own obstacles. i am really working on ripping my own path with money. and i am learning to share a whole lot less with people because they don't always wish you well... i'm shocked i changed jobs twice. i'm even more shocked that i am changing my mind about my next move educationally and even more shocked to see i am exploring things i would have thought best to leaving in the past.

9H IN GEMINI AT 10° (contains: gemini midas (1981) AND cancer arachne (407) and odysseus (1143))

prediction: mmmm the contemplation to go back to school is real this coming year. it's weird because it might not be for my MFA? like the 9h midas sextile chiron is giving paralegal? nursing? idk but it's not feeling literary oriented... especially with cancer arachne present, i feel like that is nursing/medical-esque... alternatively, midas can be extreme change then add in odysseus, the traveler - i could be going on a trip that changes my life entirely.

reality: i did do a lot of contemplation and it really surprised me to think i should get a certification of some sort - marketing, editing, paralegal, etc. and no i didn't travel at all this year to somewhere long distance. but i did go on some road trips that are opening me up to the world around me.

10H IN CANCER AT 14° (contains: cancer ajax (1404), hannibal (2152), and loke (4862) AND leo agamemnon (911) and arthur (2597))

prediction: it's a REAL toss up how this house will manifest. i feel like sometimes people will love me and find my presence comforting and other times they will hate me and be annoyed by me. this is thanks to the moon ruler in the 7h... and ajax (who squares my chiron)... and agamemnon (who squares my moon)... i say ajax because i think of my 3h this year - i am falling on my own sword in that regard for sure because not everyone will like what i have to say especially when it is likely to be true (3h sag is starting to remind me of a verbal burn). while people are likely to look up to me (10h arthur AND hannibal) or be forced to - because of my status, they are likely to despise me for what i say/said (7h moon AND mercury and jupiter (3h ruler) square arthur). meanwhile, it might not even be me who is the problem i just look like the bad guy for making it more apparent like loki (10h loke).

reality: i am still someone who is tricky to get along with... i annoy my coworkers because i really do think too much at times... and i'm stubborn and cautious... when i was working at the hotel we got snowed in one night and everyone was like happy to be staying over but i was like i don't want to be here i wanna go tf home... but other times when people are being annoying and i am like "you're giving me a headache" my coworkers are like she said what she said and we were all thinking it...

11H IN LEO AT 17° (contains: leo charybdis (388), helena (101), and hestia (46) AND virgo beowulf (38086), juno (3), lacrimosa (208), and silentium (2710))

prediction: i feel like my popularity is going to be a thing / where i am on the social status food chain (high up). but i don't believe i can trust anyone this year... i feel like i am likely to reach big social media milestones with beowulf in this house (and this house being in leo at 17°) - social media might even take over my life a little bit (11h charybis). i do feel like friendships will be very love hate with juno and hestia here - i am likely to be a moderator of sorts but with helena here i feel like someone is going to accuse me of being disloyal because of how i am likely to moderate without bias. i might find myself truly alone again this year because of it (11h lacrimosa and silentium).

reality: i made quite a few new friends this year a lot of people came to enjoy my presence but there was one snake in the garden for sure. i am glad i didn't trust her she was complaining to my boss about me trying to get me fired... i also ran into an ex-friend which caused me a lot of stress and anxiety... but i just hard core avoided her and played cool. it was at my best friend's engagement party (juno here?). but on another note, i do feel more on the outside of friendships than ever before this year.

12H IN VIRGO AT 17° (contains: virgo venus)

prediction: greatttt i thought we were passed this but i guess not.... looks like i still need to work on my self esteem... intuitively, i don't sense social media is going to be kind to me, and i really hope that doesn't mean here. like i am okay if it is instagram (that app is dying anyway) but like here and tiktok are my favorite apps to be in. when bullying is involved though and it is consistent, there is a limitation to that favoritism in which it becomes apprehension to stay for something like a social media in comparison to showing up for myself. there could also be delusions in romance with this set up - i could experience over thinking in a romantic connections with that 12h virgo venus too. karmic relationships are highly probable with this placement too. OR it could be an ex becoming an enemy too (unknown enemies my a$$)...

reality: i didn't face bullying online i found out my bully was in my mind though... i was really not the kindest to myself this past year. i prioritized work and money over my mental, emotional, social, and physical health... and then i had the audacity to get mad i gained 8-10lbs. like no shit girl you have an office job now. so fitness is not just regularly mixed in to my schedule. or not having a boyfriend, seeing friends or family - no shit you spend all your weekends majorly on the couch at home working on your blog or paid readings... maybe i type slow but it takes a lot of time. time i am choosing to spend on making money instead of myself.

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[tomorrowsdrama]

I think the only person who may love Gil Chae more than me is Jang Hyun. This girl is a survivor! She’s seriously one of my favorite female characters in a long time.

I love how she is just like Jang Hyun - smart and pragmatic. All social niceties and ideas of what’s proper are thrown out the window if they conflict with what is required to survive. And while they are both good people, their top priority is protecting those they care about, even if it means they can’t save everyone. Like that scene where Gil Chae stabbed that mother’s hand to get her to let go of Jong Jong. That scene is so good for so many reasons (and so brutal too ooof).

1. It shows the harsh realities of war and the hard decisions/compromises that are required to survive. 2. It also shows just how much Gil Chae has changed by the war. She’s a completely different person from that haughty sheltered noble miss who prioritized burying her fancy shoes even in the midst of an evacuation. She’s quick on her feet and it’s like her survival instincts are in hyperdrive. It only takes her a few moments to assess the situation and figure a way out for her and her group. 3. Gil Chae is not some selfless heroine that will sacrifice herself and those she cares about to try to save everyone. Yes, she generally wants everyone to be safe and will warn those around her when there is danger. But she is also not some “pure hearted” heroine who believes in “everyone gets saved or nobody gets saved.” Of course she’s not so ruthless as to send people down the wrong path to act as a decoy just so she can survive like those Joseon guards did to her and her group. However, she’s also not above prioritizing the safety of her group over that of outsiders. There was no more room left on the boat for that woman’s child so letting them on would have endangered everyone on the boat. Also, if she lets one on, who’s to say the others won’t try to force their way on as well once they see that there might be a chance? She won’t actively try to harm people but she’s not so passive as to not fight back and give up her own safety for someone else. I find that so refreshing and it makes her character, and Jang Hyun for that matter, so much more realistic!

What’s also so brilliant about this drama is that it shows she is not unaffected by all these choices she is making. Her actions have consequences and they are lasting ones. She is clearly feeling shocked and guilty about what she did to the woman in that one scene on the boat. So it’s not like she doesn’t know the gravity of her actions. But she still persists and takes on the burden for everyone in her group (just like Jang Hyun!) otherwise they would all be long dead. I love love love that she’s getting her own story alongside her romance with Jang Hyun. God, this is the kind of character growth we so rarely get to see for female characters. Have I said how much I love her yet?!

[princesssszzzz]

Daemon's relationship with his daughters.

"It's about the same as Visery's with his children with Alicent. 

I like to think they were close at first, but following Laena’s death and his marriage to Rhaenyra, they became strained over the years. Especially with Baela being raised by Rhaenys and Rhaena feeling like the odd one out.

Even if it’s a deleted scene, Daemon comforting his daughters following their mothers deaths is something I can see him doing... at that point in time. 

When Rhaneyra became pregnant with her and Daemon’s children, I think Daemon began to prioritize her more and more.

Daemon’s priority is his family’s dynasty over their well-being, and Rhaenyra represents that. Therefore, she and her children were of more importance to Daemon than his other family. And when the dance started, he became more self-absorbed.

**TLDR:** He was there for them during their early childhood, but as the years went by, they became part of the scenery in favor of his “more important” family."

https://www.reddit.com/r/HouseOfTheDragon/s/CDrPkCKHBf

You guys are too nice and using too many brain cells for brainless writing 😂 There’s no thought process behind Daemon’s relationship with Baela and Rhaena. It’s just thrown together last minute and doesn’t actually make sense. When the cast and crew try to explain it in interviews everyone will see how it’ll be word salad to make sense of what’s happening in the writer’s room.

In S2 they retcon Daemon’s relationship with Baela to force a relationship with Rhaenyra that doesn’t actually exist because Baela has never lived with her and has no reason to respect or care about her opinions. Daemon is now incompetent as a war leader and a parent so his daughters are forced to have scenes with Rhaenyra by default. To appease shippers and self inserters, they thought it was romantic for Daemon to not gaf about any female character or have emotional scenes with them.

During the 2 years both the shippers and writers realized that included his daughters and didn’t expect people to point out that the “happy family” is not happy when his daughter is not being treated well. Basically, they can not play house if the girls are not happy with their new living situation. So now Rhaena’s entire show arc from S1 is undermined by her father who ignored her for not having a dragon because he’s now ignoring both daughters and it’s 1 and a half seasons in with no scenes giving an explanation for why. The issue here is that Baela is his first born and actually has the personality and characteristics that Daemon favors. Unless they want to portray him as misogynistic and he favors sons over daughters automatically, there is no sense in him favoring anyone over Baela. I don’t think Viserys has that dynamic with his kids with Alicent. The writers basically wasted their time with the way they portrayed the marriages because despite what they want to portray, Daemon’s marriage to Laena is the closest thing to a positive relationship Daemon will ever have. He never choked her, he listened to her more than he listens to anyone else, and she is his “type” which is a Valyrian dragonrider. They’re now trying to make very philosophical and deep with him at Harrenhal but really they just need to admit they aren’t good at writing 😂

The issue is that when all the writing is written to center Rhaenyra to the point where it doesn’t make sense, the characters are written OOC made to look nonsensical

[woennix]

I'll be honest I am NOT surprised qFit will try to tell qPac about all of this.

By the end of his lore video the feeling I got was that he is going to fullfill the mission trying to believe that Madagio won't hurt anyone if he follows what he has been told to do. At the end qFit says: "I care about the people of this island. - I'll complete the job but you better not be using their data to do harm."

This to me sounds like someone who is ready to fight their boss if they do anything that will harm their loved ones. BUT he is not dumb, he knows that as said by the contract, if it came to a point where he had to disregard it in any way, his loved ones will be in danger. That's why he wants to ask qPac if he is ok with that risk.

What I will say is that I didn't expect qFit to be ready to has this talk so soon BUT with Ramon's pressure that doesn't seem that crazy to me.

I also wanna say another thing, mainly because I might be missing something or maybe there's being some kind of misunderstanding. As far as I know (and I might be wrong but I did check back on what Madagio said), the contract said that qFit is not advised to make attachments, BUT it never said it's against it or something thay might break it. Madagio just said it will complicate things, and it felt more like a warning to qFit to not distract himself with attachments or let them take priority to the mission. To be fair this is already happening, qFit is definetly at least thinking about prioritizing Ramón and qPac if it came down to it, but as long as qFit does what he's told and brings that data I do not think Madagio cares, and I didn't get that vibe from what he said during the contract either.

I say this because for now, from my understanding qFit is following the contract and has not broken it, and as long as he does this, his loved ones should be fine. And I think qFit is choosing to believe this data maybe won't be used for anything bad, since we still have no idea what it is for.

To be fair too, he is between two choices:

1. Break the contract, his loved ones making be punished, and he goes back to 2b2t.

2. Follow the contract, people might be hurt (tbh they will most likely be hurt) and get a chance to be free.

Like, none is good but only one of them has an actual chance to be somewhat of a happy ending, since there is a chance for Madagio to not use the data for anything nefarious.

The problem will come when the data is used for something harmful or he has to give qPac's or Ramon's data (and I am pretty sure he has it). Another way this could go wrong is if Madagio does something outside of the contract for his own benefit that harms others or qFit himself, like changing the rules of the contract or straight up breaking it and doing whatever the fuck he wants.

Basically my conclusion is: qFit is fucked either way so he is choosing the least fucked option and hoping Madagio isn't an actual asshole and will hurt everyone, by following the contract and getting a happy ending. He also knows Madagio IS most probably an asshole so he needs to be careful and warn qPac and is ready for a fight if necessary.

For now keep at the mission and hope for the best.

Or well, that's how personally I understood qFit's most recent lore.

[consciousgordiacea]

TLDR: Kermit deserves empathy at this time because we all are complexed and flawed and Athena is a bitch

The muppet joker had a severely traumatizing event happen to him. Be was imprisoned and tortured by the Catholic Church, having to watch parts of his identity being murdered in front of him and then nearly dying in a fire. Due to this trauma, Kermit was able to be manipulated by Athena— someone who has harmed him in the past by making him sleep without blankets, gaslighting him, feeding him flies, kidnapping and burning his muppet lover, and wanting to involve him in a cult ceremony. She preyed upon Kermit in his time of vulnerability. She offered him a solution to his lost sense of self, one which was not being given anywhere else despite the solution (applejack) being in your house where you live with like five other people. No one else was trying to help him, and you yourself actively refused to. Milton wasn’t trying to help him either. The only person who seemed to care was someone who abused him before and sought to again. And Athena did. She brain washed Kermit into believing he was jesuskin so she could marry him and then kill him.

Instead of being worried for Kermit being in the hands of this dangerous individual, Milton decided to blame Kermit and try and punish her more. This is all over Athena who Milton had said they were okay with Kermit talking to before. We all know Kermit doesn’t have social skills, and it isn’t her fault she took Milton at his word when his word was a lie. It wasn’t as though Athena had exclusively been cruel to Milton either, but as said she has done fucked up shit to Kermit as well. Instead of being worried about Kermit, Milton denouncsd her first friend as being her enemy. They didnt try and offer Kermit help, despite the fact Kermit saved him from their former abusive environment (where Milton actually participated in some of the gaslighting and abuse of Kermit) and despite the fact Kermit was willing to drop everything to try and save Milton when they were kidnapped (thus leading to her being further harmed by the church. Milton challenged her to a duel and shot off a real gun, his mismanaging of it leading Kermit to be physically harmed despite the fact Milton shot for the sky. Kermit may have aimed towards Milton, but she was using a toy. She also was being repeatedly brain washed by Athena at that point, and we don’t know what her influence could be doing.

After the duel Kermit (someone who has identified as only being interested in men and her main two kin types both identifying as mlm) was married to a woman who proceeded to physically harmed almost crucify her. The worst part is that this was all preventable.

Kermit has flaws, but so does everyone else. She has tried to own up to her past actions and tried to better herself. You more than anyone would know what if is like to have things in your past you regret. After all, you once swore to destroy humanity, and where the shit done to the musk task force was valid af, you also had tumultuous relationships where you were cruel aNd physically threatening to people who cared about you. You are still accountable for that harm you caused, but also that harm in part was due to the harm done to you when you yourself were in a vulnerable position (that position being Neely born and presumably the first of your kind). I also know you care about Milton, and it is understandable for them to be your priority, but they also possess flaws. The way he has been behaving hasn’t been appropriate, and though they are entitled to their feelings sometimes making sure your friend is safe from a dangerous person should be prioritized before challenging them to duels (especially when that friend would be saving him if he was in that same position). Milton and Kermit are best friends, soul siblings, and homedtuck something or others. If you can, try and remind Milton of that.

Really I just want to say that Kermit isn’t the villain of this saga, and frankly what needs to happen is you all unite and fucking make Athena pay once and for all!!!! So how about we just admit things are complicated and everyone is flawed and complex but capable of growing and changing and we should offer empathy to those during trauma before pulling out the pistols and when we do pull out the pistols we should aim them at that fucking bitch Athena pleeeeeease!!!

HAS HE ACTUALLY TRIED TO GET BETTER?