#what did i just write lol
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"Nathan is not just a Fuckboy! He's the Fuck-Lord! He trained the Fuckboys! He runs the Fuck Order! He wasn't just raised into The Fuck, he was birthed into The Fuck."
- Warren Graham, probably
#submission#source: Hiccups directed by Joel Haver#any guy can be a fuckboi but it takes a real man to be a fucklord#what did i just write lol#thanks for the submission!!!#warren graham#nathan prescott#grahamscott#life is memes#life is strange#incorrect quotes
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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"
like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.
"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."
... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.
and i'd still keep writing.
i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.
i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley
"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"
and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.
it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.
you create because you're greedy.
#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME#there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing#and the writing is what i need to be doing#writeblr#this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to#edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol#i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!!#my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means#i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her)#hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong#i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet.#i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse#i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!!#i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO#i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness#and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it#im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us#i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer#and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art.#i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work#even if it means being miserable#but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.
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Do you not know what aroace means?
Personally, I don’t think kissing is sex, but u let me know if I’m misunderstanding what you’re trying to say to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Info on aroace identity
#anyway shipping is fun :)#for those who may be curious#im writing/drawing an alastor on the aroace spectrum pretty much all the time lol#but even if I wasn’t#it’s all just fun#I truly don’t think anyone is trying to erase his canon identity#and even if they did try…THEY CANT SO WHATS THE BIG DEAL
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Thanks.
Prev
#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop nature au#fop dev#fop dale#dev dimmadome#dale dimmadome#art#digital art#comic#The 'Thanks' after all of that makes me so insane Im not even sure I can fully articulate why#I mean. He got what he wanted. Honesty. Thats what you wanted right Dev?#what else do you say to that#He's spent his whole life being sure he knew the answer. That deep DEEP down dale did love him#Have you ever seen that post thats like“I was bawling my eyes out and somebody told me to shut up and I was so taken aback I stopped crying#I think he was so stunned that he just stopped crying.#or like when you get so upset that your feelings turn themselves off to protect you#is that a normal thing that happens to people Erm. anyway#Sorry lol as someone born to parents who.. should not have had me. Writing dale basically admitting as much is actually really cathartic#He shouldnt have had Dev. He doesnt love him. He cant. Dev cant do anything to change it. Its just a fact.#Hes not 1:1 with my parents they tried their best ig but like. their best was still pretty awful child neglect LOL
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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For my birthday... read my webcomic! It's literally free! (Unless you want books. Those are not free)
It's beautiful, it's gentle, it's funny, they're canonically t4t and gay... And it's about time traveling vampires solving supernatural mysteries!
I've spent thousands of hours writing and drawing it, and it's really good! I'm not biased!
It's on hiatus right now and coming back in 2 months, so it's the perfect time to get caught up
#i felt weird putting this in there so I didnt but I've also received recognition for excellence in writing#and was nominated as a fan favorite on webtoon canvas...#so like not only do i work super hard but its just really good!#im not ashamed of claiming that i think my work is well done. if i didn't think i was doing a good job why would i do it#buuuut. something about being like please read my comic im literally so good at comics feels weird to me#even though i think that. in my brain#i dont want to imply that there is some objective or tangible goodness to my work simply for receiving some accolades#its nothing other than some accolades. whether or not someone likes it is up to them#so i guess to me it just feels superfluous#but genuinely I love my comics...#i re read them all the time. and i enjoy them!#theres things i would change and probably will change when i go to print#but i did what I could with the time and energy I had#and when it comes back... oh boy.#my friends have agreed its the best stuff ive ever written. it's literally so good...#im so excited to share.#still not fully ready to officially commit to the return date#but i am gunning for it!#webcomics#webtoon#time and time again#its my birthday!#idk wtf to tag this as. im 27 now...#read my comic#LOL
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Disclaimer: I know about the duffle bag Filbrick threw at him, but you can ignore that if you want
My thoughts below the cut! (this turned into a whole ass fic lmao)
My personal headcanon is that Filbrick is as much of a coward as he is of an asshole. Therefore, he wouldn't have kicked Stan when he did in canon. Probably not for a while after that.
However, he does try to send him to military school. He keeps talking about how this kid needs to learn discipline and respect, and if he's not gonna bring money to the house, then he should at least bring some honor to his family.
Stan obviously does NOT want to go. Not only because it's a pointless war ("what've the vietnamese done to us anyways?") but because he remembers his mother's face when Shermie got drafted and he will NOT make her go through that hell again. Also, he doesn't wanna die!!!! Hello?????
He talks it out over the phone with Ford, who's obviously just as against it as he is. He tells Stan that, if he gets into a PhD program, he could skip military. Stan laughs in his face. It'd be easier to jump off the plane without a parachute.
And so, he comes up with a plan. When he goes to take his physical, he tries his best to botch it. If he is bad enough, if it looks like he can't do it, maybe he won't have to. Unfortunately, the recruiters are far too used to this by now, and they don't buy it. Stan goes home with a recruitment letter hidden in his jacket.
Everything goes downhill after that. He runs away from home, changes his name several times, does some crime here and there... The military is after him, and it doesn't take rejection kindly.
Stan stays out of contact with his family for a few years. He can't risk getting them involved in this mess. They don't deserve it. So he just leaves, without saying a word, in the middle of the night. No phone calls, no notes, nothing. Not even he knows where he's going. But if it just looks like he abandoned them, maybe they'll hate him. That will make them sound more believable with the police. They aren't covering for him, because they genuinely have no idea where he is. It's the best way to keep them safe.
In that time, Ford doesn't stop looking for him. He finds him every once in a while, but only his phone number, and he knows that could give away his brother's location and get the family in trouble. So, against his deepest instincts, he doesn't call.
One, three, five, seven years pass. Stan has been around almost all the country, and is genuinely considering leaving it. Maybe going to Mexico, or Colombia. Those sound nice. Maybe they'll be nicer to him.
He's passing his time and thinking about this in a small town restaurant in wherever he's in (somewhere he's not banned from, yet), when a family enters. He doesn't make eye contact, but he can't help but stare at them: a man and a woman, probably in their 50s, with 7 kids; one must be older than him, the second one around his age, the third one a little younger, the fourth one a teenager, and the last three between 10 and 15, no more. Except for the last three, they're all taller than him, even the mother, and they have various degrees of blond hair. Their clothes (overalls and plastic boots) suggest they must work in one of the farms he's seen around the state. They don't wear any accessories, except for the glasses that the father and four of the kids have. They're talking loudly and laughing. They look exhausted from a morning of hard work. They seem happy. They... look nothing like his family, and yet, he can't help but think about it.
He can't help the sob that comes to his throat. It's loud and messy from trying to suppress it, which obviously makes it worse. He covers his mouth immediately, and at that point he notices the tears that have run down his cheeks. "Great", he thinks, "that will make it easier to hide, for sure".
He doesn't move. He wants to escape, but that will draw even more attention to him, and he hasn't even paid for the food yet (normally he'd leave without paying, but the old waitress was kind enough to give him some extra food when she saw how little he ordered). He settles for not moving, lowering his head and covering his face, hoping that no one heard (unlikely) or cared (very likely).
"Ya'lright, son?"
The voice startles him. I wasn't very deep, but it was close enough to send his body into immediate danger mode. He looks up at the man towering over him, who's standing in front of him at a prudential distance.
"Y-Yeah, yeah, no worries."
He hates how broken his voice sounds. He's spent more than enough time sweet-talking his way out of trouble, he should be better at this by now. The man looks about as convinced by it as he is himself.
" 'lright then. Can I help ya?"
Damn villagers and their welcoming demeanor. If he wasn't a wanted man, he would appreciate it. But right now, it couldn't be worse timing.
"Come get ya food, kids!" The waitress' yell yanks him out of his thoughts.
"No", he blurts out, and he turns to the man. Least he can do is show him some respect and look him in the eyes. "I'm fine, thank you."
The man smiles lightly and nods. "Okay. Welcome to the town."
Stan watches as the man goes back to his table. He wishes he had been more polite, the guy was just worrying about him, but he can't afford it. They already know his face, he can't risk anyone else recognizing him-
"Sweet Mother of God almighty."
Stan turns to his right. One of the kids, the one about his age, is looking at him like he just grew a second head. He's frozen in place, his eyes wide as plates behind thick glasses. He doesn't say a word, and it's getting increasingly unnerving. Was the bruising on his face still visible? Maybe it's more apparent in broad daylight than in the shitty light that last motel had in the bathroom.
"I'm sorry, I- Can I ask your name?"
The fuck?
"No", answers Stan. Considering how nice his dad was, this guy is pretty rude.
"Son, leave him alone." The mother seems to have manners too, good to know.
The guy does pretty much the opposite. He comes closer to him, until he's right in his path, blocking his exit. That can't be good. Stan feels trapped.
"Are you Stanley Pines?"
Well, that's about it.
Stan tries his best to stay still. This guy doesn't look like a cop, not even an undercover one. But he knows his real name, so maybe someone in his family or friends works in the police; or worse, in the military.
"Listen man, I don't know who you're talking about, but that isn't my name. See?" He reaches for his wallet. He pulls out an ID, with a very clear Jackson Cage on it. He makes a mental note to change it soon, just in case his hunch is right and this guy has connections. "Now, if you excuse me, I'd like to pay for my food and leave. Move."
Stan is already on his feet, but the guy hasn't moved. Stan looks him up and down, trying to appear threatening despite his face probably still being a little red from before. He also gauges how feasible it'd be to escape if things turned bad; the dude is taller than him, sure, but he's also as thin as a toothpick, and by the anxious look on his face, he doesn't seem eager for a fight. The real problem would be evading the restaurant's staff and the other costumers, which include eight carbon copies of the guy in front of him. Probably better to try to de-escalate the situation.
"I- I can't let you leave. Please. I know who you are."
This man is making it really difficult to believe he's not a cop.
"No, you don't. I'm new in town. Move."
"Listen, I-"
"Move out of my way."
"I know your brother."
The words are like a bullet between his eyebrows.
"You look just like him-"
Against his better judgement, he quickly grabs he guy and pins him to the wood in between the booth benches, arm to his throat. If he knows Ford, he knows too much. God he just wanted to have lunch.
The commotion is immediate. He doesn't break eye contact with the guy who's grabbing his arm, whose strength is frankly surprising. He can hear, however, the screams from the dad and the siblings, as well as a couple of gasps from the other costumers. This is not going to go well, but fuck that. He's escaped worse.
"Stop!", the guy shouts as he keeps Stan's forearm from blocking his airway. "Don't hurt him! Don't get closer!"
It takes Stan a second to process what he said. The first part, sure, who wouldn't shout 'stop' when you're being attacked? But the second half doesn't make sense. Is he protecting him? The attacker?
Whatever it is, it works. The family stops in their tracks, still very ready to attack if needed. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see the three younger kids moving closer to their mother. For a split second, he feels a pang of remorse for the scene he just caused.
"Hang up the phone, Clarisse, it's okay. Please."
Stan looks in the direction the guy was talking to. Right behind him, the waitress reluctantly puts the phone down.
He looks back at the guy. He looks a little shaken up, probably from the impact his back (and his head?) made with the wooden plank, but he doesn't look scared. He almost looks... sympathetic? Stan is confused as hell.
"I know who you are", the guy whispers, low enough for Stan to hear alone. "You're Stanley Pines, and you have a brother named Stanford. I know him, okay? He's my friend. I met him a few years ago in a quantum physics congress and we've been talking ever since. He told me about his family in New Jersey, and about you. About how he hasn't seen you in years, and how he was trying to find you, to no avail."
Stan is gradually loosening his grip on the guy's neck, who takes a deep breath. He should know better, but- shit, hearing that Ford was looking for him was not what he expected. Even if he doesn't know yet if this guy is lying out of his ass, it's enough to make him doubt.
"I know you were called to Vietnam. He told me. I spent a week with him in his place when he found out, he was unconsollable. When you ran away, he called me. He knew what it meant for you and he thought he'd never see you again, whether you got caught or not. All because of that stupid war." Stan is now trembling a little, he knows it. This guy must know it too, with how close they are. If he stays here any longer he'll break down, but he can't move. Anything to hear his brother's name a little longer. "I know what it's like. Three of my cousins were drafted last year, and I know at least one of them won't be coming back home. Please... let me help you."
Stan meets his eyes. They're green and brown-ish, not unlike the immense fields he's seen in his last journey, the one that led him to this town. With the years, he's learned not to trust beautiful eyes, because they are better at hiding. These ones, however, seem serene and honest, just like his words, and he can't help but believing them. This guy, whoever the fuck he is, knows just about enough.
Stan lowers his right arm. The guy still has his hand on it, but this time is much less defensive and much more comforting. He doesn't complain.
"My name's Fiddleford McGucket, and I'm gonna help you find your brother."
______________________________
Essentially, after this Fidds calls Ford as if nothing happened (per Stan's request, since he's still paranoid about the police tracking his calls) and asks him to come to Tennessee. Ford argues that he's very busy and all, but Fidds convinces him in the end.
Obviously the twins have a dual breakdown and cry their heart out. In this AU they're much less emotionally constipated lol
Ford tells Stan that he's gonna build a house in a small town in Oregon as a part of his research, and asks him to move in with him once it's finished. Stan, of course, accepts.
In the meantime, Stan stays in the McGucket farm and helps them out as a way of laying low. He has a great relationship with his family, and they're very proud of him for what he did (i believe that the McGuckets are hippies at heart, and they're VERY anti-war, especially when it already took three of them)
I don't know how much of the canon storyline would this AU follow, but it's pretty much your average Mystery Trio AU with some different backstory
#please feel free to share your headcanons! i'd love to read them <3#when i tell you i CANNOT believe how much i've written here#i just re-read everything i was like 'did i write this? three hours ago? tf????'#i'm pretty happy with it tho#i feel like you can pinpoint the exact moment that my brain decided we were writing a fic instead of a headcanon lol#i don't know what to call this one so i'm just gonna call it#Drafted AU#also if you wanna know more about this idea that i literally just pulled out of my ass ask away!#gravity falls#gravity falls au#stanley pines#grunkle stan#stan pines#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddlestan#yes it's canon here because i said so#stan twins#mystery trio#tumblr polls#polls#my silly little headcanons#hells originals#hells writes
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Pac: Oh– [Stammers] Why– I have an Ender Flu? I'm shaking! Oh my god.
Tubbo: No, Pac! You've been impregnated! 😫
Pac: IMPREGNATED?!?! Wait, what? 😨
Fit: Oh god. [Laughs] That's a new one.
Tubbo: You're pregnant!
Pac: How?!
Tubbo: I can't believe preggers Pac is on the QSMP!
Pac: Oh my god, I'm so happy! [Laughs]
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
—
Tubbo: This is not what I want! I don't want this!!!
Fit: [Chuckles]
Pac: Oh– [Stammers] Why– I have an Ender Flu? I'm shaking! Oh my god.
Tubbo: No, Pac! You've been impregnated!
Pac: IMPREGNATED?!?! Wait, what?
Fit: Oh god. [Laughs]
Tubbo: You're pregnant!
Pac: How?!
Fit: That's a new one.
Tubbo: Uh oh, I'm about to– I'm about to not be alive much longer.
Pac: How– ahhh!!!! Wait, this is good? [Tubbo gets killed by a mob] Oh my god, Tubbo!
Tubbo: Guys? Preggers Pac, and Fit, help!
Pac: [Reading chat] "Congratulations"? Thanks guys, I didn't know, man! As always.
Fit: [Revives Tubbo] Alright, run! Ok, you're good.
Tubbo: We got his ass!
Pac: Wait, wait– What does it mean like, I'm pregnant? I'm gonna have babies?
Tubbo: It means you're gonna give birth to a beautiful– a beautiful plethora of children!
Pac: Oh my god, not– [unintelligible]
Tubbo: [Still ranting] Merciful, wonderful babies! Babies! Innocent babies will-
Fit: [Laughs] Yeah, what he said.
Tubbo: –will splurt out of you!
Pac: Oh my god. I think I saw like, Foolish having birth the other day, so I–
Fit: [Fighting a mob] Not this thing again!
Pac: Oh my god.
Tubbo: I can't believe preggers Pac is on the QSMP!
Pac: Oh my god, I'm so happy! [Laughs]
Fit: [Laughs]
Tubbo: It's gonna be such a magical time for you!
Pac: Yeah, oh my god, I have been like, dreaming for–
Tubbo: Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. What do you– have you got any names? What are you gonna name it?
Pac: I'm probably gonna name it "Elton" and "John" if I have like, two.
Tubbo: Ohhh! What a beautiful name!
#Pactw#Tubbo#FitMC#QSMP#Morning Crew#September 8 2023#~36m into Fit's stream | ~ 54:20 into Pac's stream | ~41:45 into Tubbo's stream#Head in my hands this was such a cursed bit every time this happened to anyone#Here's a fun fact for those of you who read the tags I write:#Pac once said he'd love to have twins#It was on October 27 2023 during the Minime arc#Timestamp ~ 1h 56m into Fit's stream (I don't have the timestamp for Pac's stream unfortunately)#Pac says ''I'd love to have twins!'' and then Tubbo says ''I'm fine with one; I'm the reason for the declining birth rate.''#Pftt#I remembered that comment while I was transcribing this and wanted to see if I had it written down anywhere – and I did!#Pac#Fit#Edited#Anyways I can't tell what Pac said after that ''Not'' bit earlier#At first I thought he said ''Not again'' and I had war flashbacks#But no he said something else I just can't tell what#Feel free to let me know what you think he said if you can hear it better!#The Elton John bit was going on earlier too btw Pac didn't just whip that up out of nowhere lol#You can't see it since this is Pac's POV but in Fit's chat someone said ''Mike isn't here you're going to have to help him Fit'' pftt
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i wanted to write a quick 3-chapter fic for day 4 of loa shiptober (how they met i think) and i (a fool) was like. yeah. i could totally write 3 chapters in a few hours. i was wrong. SO wrong. haven’t even finished kremy’s (the first one).
so instead have a maybe-past-kremy design that im conflicted about compared to his current design, as a peace offering
#i kinda hate this ngl#im still writing it it’ll be like a week or two late tho skfjd#i spend like 20 minutes playing around with one 5-line paragraph#logical human brain says edit after getting the story out#but the worms consuming it say “it has to be good on the first draft or else you suck” and i cant argue with that#i like to think that kremy used to dress kind of dark and simple bc he didnt have that much money to spend on luxuries#and he saved up for his silly fancy suit#and spooky fancy cane#and silly fancy tophat!#he has fun with it i think#kremy doesnt draw on a mustache every day for nothing gotta give him his flowers#not too sure how i feel about my past kremy design tbh#i did just pull up pinterest and search up suit. so. thats on me lol#let me know what yall think#thanks for reading my tag rambles mwah mwah#kremy appreciation <3#once upon a witchlight#legends of avantris#kremy lecroux#ouaw fanart#my art
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And some days, I just wish you wouldn't look at me at all.
#ffxiv#sketch#wol#meteor survivor#zenos yae galvus#adventurer zenos#oh no#its the consequences of his actions#everything is fine until the only man on the star you care about looks at you with the same contempt your father did#(Meteor's not doing it intentionally- its a reflex after he comes back for quite a bit)#and zenos is getting bodied because its been a while since... you know... him being able to really feel anything at all#and no- its not him regretting anything that had to do with varis- just him regretting the thought meteor could look at him like that#little does Meteor know he's emotionally bodying the man he's trying to be cordial with#its a little okay because in how I write adventurer zenos this serves as one of his main wake-up calls to make some changes#and realizing both the mistakes he's made with meteor and that meteor hating him in any way is actually -not at all- what he wants#but not okay on the end that every time meteor does this he has to watch zenos actively dissociate right in front of him#until zenos just kinda autopilots and walks away#the second time (or perhaps third) in the last 11 years that zenos has felt regret to any major capacity-#on meteor's end I just enjoy seeing the progression of the WoL through subtext#and why meteor is willing to even entertain the idea despite how much he hates zenos- his decisions and the path he's walked#is the realization that there is high chance that he could actually be a direct catalyst for zenos' growth#and the realization the wol has that they were the only one zenos has ever genuinely reached out to#besides- i just like the idea of having your equal other half fighting back to back with you- or being able to handle threats you cant#and i find their dynamic neat- of meteor not forgiving zenos but giving him his last chance- and growing to enjoy being around him#and zenos being able to work on moving past being the weapon or the monster- finding the connections he's longed for#and giving himself purpose to finally truly just live- for him to learn to experience and have the freedom to find what he enjoys#(and curiously him having estinien's brand of accidently helping people even in StB gives me ideas...)#but enough tag ranting- ill get to zenos' actual adventuring in another post lol
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Latest trend: What if Odysseus sold himself to Zeus to save his men?
Me: ...
Me: Bitch, you mean what he did with CIRCE?!
#seriously though...#how on earth did we have come a full circle#like poor Odyssey#🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣#meme humor#dark humor#epic and odyssey diferences#why! just why!#shitpost#what goes around comes around#tagamemnon#sorry i had to say this#sorry i had to#fandom problems#lol 😆#greek mythology#odysseus#the odyssey#odyssey#homeric poems#giggling while writing this
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OH MY GOD??? HAS IT SERIOUSLY BEEN A MONTH????? I am so sorry guys
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#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop nature au#fop dev#fop dale#dev dimmadome#dale dimmadome#art#digital art#fanart#comic#GODD I DIDNT MEAN TO TAKE THAT LONG OF A BREAK#the next pages are done but since I posted the first 2 as a batch I decided to keep it consistent#the next two pages are already done though I promise!!!! You will not have another wait like that#wugh what was I even going to say about these pages I need to keep a commentary of my thoughts while I write these#Ill be honest the script for these pages went in a way different direction than I was planning LOL but I like it#As awful of a dad as Dale is I do think he has legitimate issues around the idea of someone taking Dev from him/dev being kidnapped#because of what Vicky did to him the idea of Dev being kidnapped makes him feel legitimately nauseous#unfortunately that doesnt always stop him from being a reckless awful parent#but it is part of the reason he would never hire a human caretaker for Dev. somethin.. something. bad experience with a babysitter...#another thing about Dale is that generally he is very... blunt with Dev. For better and for worse.#He WILL give Dev compliments if he thinks what he did was praise worthy. And he'll just as easily say something awful. if he thinks it true#more on that in upcoming pages...
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thinking about how eiji's a pole vaulter and how ash talks about eiji "flying" and how eiji's associated with bird imagery and how eiji's free (unlike ash) and how eiji comes in on a plane and leaves on a plane and how ash cannot fly, ash cannot be free, how nyc is ash's prison, and how ash is the leopard who dies climbing the mountain, unable to live at such elevation, how he was trying to reach the sky and be free but was always stuck to the earth, how he chose to die instead of climbing back down, how he chose to die where he could see the sky and hope and freedom almost like a bird with eiji's letter right in front of him rather than letting everything go wrong and ruin it once again, how eiji's a failed pole vaulter anyway, how a bad fall ruined his career and grounded him (physically and emotionally), how it took flying to america and meeting ash and needing to save him and skip for him to try flying again, how he landed hard and harsh and still the thought of that escape compelled ash to protect eiji at all costs because if he could fly that means something to him, even if he doesn't think he can fly, how eiji is the manifestation of his hope and how when he breaks and asks eiji to stay with him a while he folds himself over his legs and weighs him down and traps him and grounds him, how ash fights like hell to keep eiji alive not because he thinks he can be like him (hopeful, flying, innocent), but because he makes him forget the gravity of his situation, and so he can see eiji fly again. how he wants to see him escape. how eiji is a bird and ash is a wildcat and how ash never once saw eiji as prey. how eiji never saw ash as a predator. how it is eiji's naivete that first endears ash to him, how it is his freedom and flight and removal from darkness and his ability to leave that darkness that really roots eiji in ash's blood as something essential to him keeping on living in this hell of nyc. how it is that distance from the violence and that hope for the future that ash chooses to surround himself in as he dies. how ash dies in a dream because he feels more than anything that he can't fly like eiji, that he can never leave. how his violence is a part of him and will be forever, how it weighs him down. how he wants to enjoy the view from the mountainside rather than looking up from the ground below. as if they can both fly. as if he is with him up there and not grounded. eye-to-eye with what he can't have, seeing eiji's homeland: the sky. how he dies trying to reach the top because he couldn't take retreating and trying again. how ash, tired and tired and tired and convinced it will go on forever if he crawls back down the mountain, chooses to close his life deluged in eiji, in eiji's insistence that they can fly together, in eiji's hope for him and for them, in eiji's beautiful dream. how ash dies without trying to realize that dream. how ash, in dying, destroys it.
#banana fish spoilers#I'M HAVING A FUCKING MOMENT#mutual reblogged exactly one (1) piece of ash fanart and sent me on A Multiple Hour Long Thing and now im rewatching it lol#yes i am only on episode 2 yes i am still going to write big long analysis posts ANYWAY#whatever hope this makes sense. anyway#banana fish#okumura eiji#ash lynx#asheiji#hhhhh i can't believe i've only watched this twice in like what 5.5 years?? sheesh#anywayyyyyyy i care about them a lot ok. god#and yes i DO kinda have beef with the decision to kill ash off at the end but it really does say so much About his character#that he chose to die in the way that he did even though he's been throwing his life away since episode 1#dying in peace in comfort in solitude rather than in some chaotic battlefield.... ough...... in the peace eiji alone could give him.....#anywayss i relate to ash a little more than i should so. this one's for us cool guy bottoms up#edit i uh.... i forgot it was a leopard.... in the story..... but whatever it doesn't really affect the symbolic meaning it's just embarras#ing that i forgot >;/
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I think one of the saddest things about Veilguard is that I have no reason to replay it after a thorough playthrough (I did all side quests and only missed a couple evanuris statues and a couple codex entries). Forget about desire to replay it (there is none), there is legitimately no reason. The narrative is so linear and the most impactful choices that you do at the end are not dependent on choices you’ve made in dialogue, but whether you have ground out companion and faction quests. The results of this are not even compelling. It’s good or bad endings. I don’t even care to romance another companion because of how short and bland those storylines are (they are literally only 20min on YouTube) despite my playthrough not having the romance canon to my world state. And, world state only means something to me because I can only think of two choices that might be relevant in future games.
#lol this is me feeling better about Veilguard than I did the day after I finished it lol#I’m just so confused about how we got this game#it’s so clumsy honestly#I don’t know how we got this writing and these story mechanics#it’s unbelievably hollow and devoid of what i loved about the previous games#at least now i’m in a place where i can take solas’ ending and what happened to the griffons and ignore everyone else#dragon age critical#Veilguard critical#BioWare critical#dragon age spoilers#Veilguard spoilers#dragon age: Veilguard spoilers#spoilers
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Quick re-do of a 4 year old piece
#to test my abilities... no jk#I mean kind of lol#I WANTED To test my abilities but then I couldnt think of anything#so then I just redid an older piece#I remembered the old one started black and white and then I did effects over it so I did that again#cause I just wanted to play around with lighting#and I think its pretty obvious how much I've improved#I also only spent like an hour on the second one#wasnt trying to make anything amazing here#just trying t make something that reminds myself how growth can look and feel#important stuff to do as an artist#I'm still sick btw lol#I love how when youre losing your voice everyone goes 'wow you sound terrible'#I get why. I sound terrible. but its so fucking funny like. culturally#like holy shit what the fuck is wrong with you !#but its polite and empathetic#I havent been getting work done on account of is sick#actually not entirely true#I did a good bit of work for we were legion and some for TTA too#but it was just no drawing work#all writing work#which theres just a lot more of to for wwl than for tta#anyways#we were legion#zagan#art redo#art improvement#spent easily twice as long on the original thats a skill upgrade roight there
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Hi, Tin! I love your writing and I have a prompt for you, if you are interested) what if Tang family is too afraid of Tang Bo leaving permanently and eloping with Cheong Myeong? So they initiate marriage negotiations with Mount Hua. It can be angst (CM is socially isolated and insecure about his position) or romantic comedy (awkward situations and protective Cheong Mun), up to you). Thank you in advance!
It was a well-established fact that the Dark Saint of the Tang Family was one of their generation's best.
So it came as no surprise when an influx of marriage proposals flooded their family's estate—because rumors started flying around that the Dark Saint was in search of a partner.
The Dark Saint held a reputation for being cold and ruthless. To cultivators and martial artists, he was someone they feared making into an enemy due to his sheer battle prowess and poisonous abilities. To normal civilians, he was a genius who wielded the Tang Family's techniques with cool precision and intent; to them, he was just another mysterious cultivator that they would only ever know of through gossip and stories.
However, in recent years, something shifted. His reputation among common folk was slowly altered. It started off with a supposed battle between him and the Plum Blossom Sword Saint which turned into a sudden and unexpected friendship.
Whereas in the past the Dark Saint would only go around Sichuan and closeby villages, he was now found going around different major cities and unknown ones.
He was often in the company of Mount Hua's Plum Blossom Sword Saint, who worked with him side-by-side to eradicate groups from the Demonic Cult and the occasional bandits and thieves.
For supposed Taoists, the two visited different establishments to drink alcohol and talk cheerily. It was during one of these moments that the first rumor began its spark.
"Ahhhh," The Plum Blossom Sword Saint groans in satisfaction. "That sure hits the spot!"
The Dark Saint chuckles as he tosses back his own drink. "If only I could enjoy everyday like this. Alcohol really is the best."
"What would your future wife think?" The Plum Blossom Sword Saint jokingly and dramatically shakes his head in disappointment. "To have a husband who loves alcohol more than his own wife...!"
The Dark Saint wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. "Trust me, I would make sure that my wife knows full-well just how much I love them."
The two of them share a silent, private conversation with just their eyes alone, that none of the other restaurant's customers could decipher, before they leave a generous tip and went on their way.
It snowballs from there.
All of a sudden gossip went around about the Dark Saint's interest in finding a wife. And so several people came to the same conclusion.
The reason why the Dark Saint is travelling around more than usual is because he's looking for a prospective wife.
Clearly, the Plum Blossom Sword Saint was there to provide moral support. How truly admirable and strong their brotherhood must be!
On the other hand, the head of the Tang Family was fully aware of their Dark Saint's single-minded interest in Mount Hua's Chung Myung.
Seeing all the stacks of letters that ranged from proposing strategic alliances and general marriage offers brought the current head of the Tang Family to a very different conclusion.
Tang Bo was trying to slowly draw himself away from their family by leaving their estate. He might be on the hunt, jumping from village to village, trying to create a dowry befitting for the hand of the Plum Blossom Sword Saint and scouting out all the best locations to settle down in.
It really wouldn't be too surprising of an idea if one day a letter turns up from the man with an intent of permanently moving to Mount Hua or some backwater village.
The Tang Family head shakes the thought of losing one of their best and genius members to one of the Ten Great Sects. If he wanted to maintain their family's reputation, he'll need to strike the first move.
And so he begins to pen a decisive letter to the Sect Leader of Mount Hua.
%%%
Chung Mun's hands tremble as reads the letter sent to him by the Tang Family.
'Who did they think they were?' He would have bit out if he had any less self-restraint. The paper crumples in his grip and he receives a questioning glance from Chung Myung who was sprawled eating mooncakes on the opposite side of his desk.
"What's got you so worked up?" The subject of the letter askswithout a care.
Chung Mun takes a deep breath. "The Tang Family wishes for you to transfer into their estate."
He refuses to say out loud the marriage proposal that came along with this request. His Chung Myung was too young! The man might be a sixty years old, but that round face, cheeks carelessly bulging with mooncakes with crumbs littered on his chin, screamed too young for marriage!
"Oh." Chung Myung nods in understanding.
Chung Mun is glad that Chung Myung agrees that this was nonsensical. To think, they thought that Chung Myung would even leave Mount Hua for—
"After the war is over, Tang Bo and I were planning to be roommates and travel the world a bit."
—?????
"Roommates?" Chung Mun's voices comes out slightly strangled.
"Yup. It's going to be great."
"No."
"'No'?"
Chung Mun tries to run through his previous conversations with Tang Bo. He knew that the man was capable of being underhanded, but he was also well-aware that Tang Bo respected him enough to not blind-side him with something like this. Especially since it concerned Chung Myung.
...
...Oh no.
"Fuck." Chung Mun says, full of feeling as he recalls Tang Bo off-handedly asking permission to live together with Chung Myung in the future.
"...Sect Leader?"
Chung Mun had thought that was a joke! He thought Tang Bo wasn't being serious! They were talking with alcohol in their systems!
The alarmed look that crosses Chung Myung's face informed Chung Mun that the way he felt his blood drain from his face was a visible, physical reaction.
"He asked for your hand in marriage." Chung Mun says faintly. "I said yes."
Chung Myung blinked at him. "Yeah? He told me?"
Okay. Tang Bo, to his credit, hasn't been leaving Chung Myung in the dark at least.
If Chung Myung knows and isn't reacting violently that means that he isn't completely against this. Even if Chung Mun was, he had to reorganize his priorties.
And his number one would be to make sure Chung Myung was happy.
((And to make sure that the Tang Family doesn't think they can step on Chung Mun and pull his little brother away.))
"I'll have to recheck the sect's budget and my own savings to make sure we have enough for the wedding preparations..." Chung Mun mutters as he begins drafting a response to the Tang Family with what he thought were better marriage agreement conditions.
But then, a flash of dread causes Chung Mun to pause writing and leave a dark ink blot on the paper. He suspected, but he really wishes that he was wrong—!
"Huh?" Chung Myung gives Chung Mun a confused look. "We already got married though?"
#cmun: you didn't invite me to your wedding??!?!?!?!?#cm: we literally just a signed a paper and kissed#cm and tb eloped because cm didn't want to stretch out mount hua's resources during a war bc of wedding prep#tb and cm are too in love and just decided to get married in the middle of a drinking session actually#they only realized what they did when they woke up the next day but then 'hm? this isn't bad tho?'#anyway cmun asks them to redo their marriage lol he def cries when cmyung bows to him in lieu during the three bows#the tang and mount hua come to an agreement that they get half a year each 👍#and if tang bo still dies in this au and cm is left a widower......jk jk but then again#»—————————–✄#sorry this took me a while 🥺🙏 irl wasn't kicking it HAHAHAHA#I'm super happy to hear you enjoy my writing and thank you so much for the prompt WAHAHAHAHA#i havent finished reading the side stories yet so sorry if I messed up canon#might come back to this prompt if I find out more info bc there's so much to explore 🙈#and i had to stop bc this was already 1.1k HAHAHAHA#tangchung#chung myung#chung mun#tang bo#rotmhs#rotbb#return of mount hua sect#return of the blossoming blade#tin writes#my ask hole#w-s-kibela
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