#what could Casey even possibly be there to do if not find the way out and bring that to the victim?

[honestlyvan]

(Crossposted to Dreamwidth)

The thing that makes me the most "run around in circles" crazy about Initiation is that Alan wrote the Casey of the Dark Place into the story to help him, and then made it so that Casey knows even less about what is going on than Alan does.

Alan never gives Casey the opportunity to get past step fucking one to help him, explains nothing to him, and Casey ends up with no idea what he's even doing here, no idea what his assigned purpose is, no idea what his narrative goals are. He's an actor given no script, no stage direction, to the point that Casey doesn't even know they're in a story, and it makes him sink deeper into depression with every passing loop with no knowledge to ground him.

And it's impossible to tell if this is because Alan didn't realise that he had the perfect opportunity to write Casey like the Diver, a living repository of Alan's accumulating knowledge about the Dark Place, a seeing-eye dog to guide him through the dark -- or if Alan did try that, and it somehow went so horribly wrong that now he and Casey can't both survive in the same narrative line without trying to kill each other -- or if Alan did try that, and it went horribly right, and now the Dark Presence can't let Casey live because Alan's bespoke perfect little detective is too good at finding out useful things.

And instead, in the story we currently have, Alan made up a guy for a specific purpose of helping him, but because Alan is the protagonist, because it's his story, his fault, his duty and his job to get himself out of it, he doesn't even let Casey fulfil his narrative purpose. What the hell else is Casey supposed to do, Alan, other than the thing you literally made him for? He's the detective -- he's supposed to solve things.

[iamnotoriginalphil]

I Dwell in Possibility (Casey Novak x f!Reader)

Synopsis: Your aunt Liz warns you to stay away from her ADA. Too bad for her, you'd never been good at doing what you're told.

Words: 9.3k

Warnings: Forbidden romance, reciting poetry, oral (R giving), hickeys, swearing, possessiveness, alcohol consumption, secret relationship, strap (R receiving), dirty talk, angst, hurt/comfort

“You’re not my aunt.”

The woman looking up at you from the low sofa was not the one you were expecting. Strawberry blonde hair shining in the overhead light, fierce green eyes, full pink lips, she was the kind of woman that would devastate your heart with so little effort. Leaning your hip on the doorway, you checked the door again, certain you were in the right place. It was just like you remembered from all the hours you’d spent staying out of trouble under the watchful gaze of your aunt during your more rebellious years as a teenager.

“Not last time I checked,” the mystery woman said.

Her eyes swept over you, assessing in a way that made your nerves vibrate. Your teeth sunk into your lower lip, letting her look her fill, hoping you’d pass muster. You didn’t even know her name, and yet you wanted this woman’s approval.

“I didn’t realise Judge Donnelly had a niece,” she said, her voice a low timbre.

“I have two, and don’t even think about it.”

You whirled, finding your aunt standing behind you, the kind of look that once had you quaking in your boots on her face. Instead, your face split into a huge grin. Her face softened upon seeing you, not in a way most people would notice, but she’d been your favourite person by the time you’d graduated high school and moved away for college. She was the only reason you’d managed to get in somewhere decent. Somehow, despite all your raging against The Man, she’d kept you on track. Your sister had never understood your relationship with her, being one of the people who quaked under her gaze.

“Guess who’s back,” you said, giving her some nice jazz hands to drive your point home.

“No wonder the amount of the trouble in the city has increased,” she said.

“You missed me. Just admit it,” you said, knowing you were being the kind of cheeky that could get you told off.

She sighed but her embrace was tight. You closed your eyes, breathing in the familiar scent of her perfume. You’d missed it more than you could possibly put into words.

“So you finally finished grad school,” she said once you’d drawn away.

“I’m a bonafide doctor now. No way you can go around telling everyone I’m your wayward niece. You can just admit I’m your favourite without shame,” you said.

“And you’re a doctor in what?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Something very interesting and not at all practical, just like God intended,” you said.

She shook her head but you saw the way her lips curled up into a smile. She finally entered her office, you trailing after her. The woman, still an unknown, had been watching with a rapt attention that kept making your skin prickle. Your eyes darted down to her, teeth sinking into your lower lip again.

“Please tell me you haven’t returned to the city looking for a hand out,” your aunt said as she sat in her chair behind her imposing desk.

“I’ll have you know I have actual employment like a productive member of society,” you said.

She scoffed but it was the fond kind, not the kind that said you were in danger. You were achingly familiar with both.

“No, seriously. My supervisor knew a guy in the English department at NYU and put in a good word for me,” you said, “I’m teaching intro to the Romantics this year.”

“A worthwhile endeavour I’m sure,” she said.

“Hey, critical thinking is an important skill. Plus, reciting poetry always goes down well when trying to score a date,” you said, falling back on the couch. Only as your arm brushed hers did you remember someone was already occupying it.

“Tell me you didn’t spend all those years at college just to pick up women,” she said with an eye roll.

“That wasn’t the only reason. It was just an added benefit.” You winked at the woman sitting next to you, lips pulling up into a smirk.

“Get out,” your aunt said.

Your eyes shot back over to her but she was looking at the woman beside you.

“You asked me to come see you,” she said.

“Later,” she said.

She stared at your aunt for a moment before she collected up her papers back into the file they’d originally come from. You watched her leave, appreciating the pencil skirt she was in.

“Who was that?” you asked once the door was closed and you knew she wouldn’t hear you.

“ADA Casey Novak and if she knows what’s good for her she’ll stay away from you,” she replied.

“Aw, are you getting all protective, Aunty Liz? You’ll be putting Dad out of a job,” you said.

“Oh, I’m trying to protect her. You’re a hurricane of trouble,” she said.

“Maybe I’ve grown up. It has been a while since I’ve lived here,” you said.

“Stay away from my ADA,” she said, using her commanding voice.

She should have known better. You’d always wanted what you weren’t allowed. And you wanted Casey Novak.

Over the next few weeks you were around your aunt’s office a lot more, traversing the halls as you reacquainted yourself with the building. Keeping your eye out for a certain strawberry blonde, you’d wander around as you waited for your new job to start. Your aunt, doing her best to ignore what you were doing, put up with your impromptu visits with grace.

Sitting in on one of her trials, you found yourself coming face to face with Casey Novak again. Or rather, you could lean back and watch her dominate in the court room. It sent a flutter through your body and an itch in your fingers to sink into her. She was magnificent, a sight to behold, a lion taking down her prey with a precision that was breathtaking.

And from her pursed lips, your aunt was not happy about your presence there to see such a display.

“What are you doing here?” she asked after calling a five minute recess.

“I came to see you in action. I like watching you scare the little people,” you replied, “tell me, I’ve always wanted to know, do you practice that scowl in the mirror or does it come naturally to you?”

“You don’t care about my scowls. You couldn’t keep your eyes off a certain ADA I warned you to stay away from,” she replied.

“Aw, you do care,” you said, “you seriously think I’m going to ruin your ADA?”

Something interesting settled in her face, arms crossed over her chest. You sighed, looking away from her.

“If it means that much to you, Aunty Liz, I won’t do anything with her,” you said, knowing that giving up one gorgeous woman was the least you could do for the woman who kept you from making all the wrong decisions with your life.

She gave you a small smile, one of the fonds one that let you knew you’d made the right decision. It was the kind she gave you any time you came back with an A on a test she’d helped you study for. You sighed.

“But you owe me one. She is insanely hot,” you said, but you were smiling and the sting wasn’t so bad when it was your decision to follow the rules.

You left the courthouse, knowing you had prep work to do before the semester started. No more stalking the halls hoping to run into Casey Novak by “coincidence” and strike up a conversation that might end in her bed. She was just another gorgeous woman who would remain a ‘what if’.

It was easy to push thoughts of her to the side in the flurry of semester beginning. You couldn’t believe how much work went into teaching a college course, your sympathy going out to every professor you’d ever had. Especially those teaching your intro classes, when freshmen came in with all the confidence they hadn’t earned.

“When did becoming devil’s advocate become the cool thing for boys to do?” you asked.

Your aunt looked up at you from over the rim of her glasses, looking less than impressed with your question. You sighed, slumping back against her sofa. On one of the few days you weren’t teaching, you’d sought refuge in the only place you knew would offer you both a slap over the head and a warm hug. Using the pretence of lunch, you’d brought her food and your frustration.

“Okay, sure, they’ve always kind of been like that but now I have to hold my tongue and not go off on how stupid they are,” you complained.

“Yes, because now you’re the adult in the room,” she replied with all the judgement held in her body in her voice.

“How do you manage it?” you asked, looking at her again, “I’ve seen some of your cases. You’ve dealt with some real…”

You couldn’t find the right word.

“Assholes?”

You turned, finding the only woman in the city you were forbidden from even thinking about standing in the doorway. Your aunt’s eyes darted to yours then back to Casey Novak and you saw the warning there.

“You said it, not me,” you said with a small laugh.

The way she stepped into the room had you forcing yourself to look away. Her hips were swaying with a cockiness you’d attempted to pull off plenty of times and had never quite managed. If you kept staring you might never stop.

“Did you need something, Casey?” your aunt asked.

“The Jensen case,” she replied.

“I’ll get out of your hair,” you said, standing, collecting up your rubbish.

Your shoulder brushed Casey Novak’s as you passed her, a jolt of electricity going through you. Your gaze caught on hers as you passed and you felt your breath still.

It was a good thing you loved your aunt so much or else you’d be in trouble.

Taking yourself out for coffee was becoming one of your Saturday traditions. A worn paperback in your hands and a corner table with your caffeine fix and some kind of pastry was easily becoming your favourite part of your week. It was early enough in your weekend that you didn’t feel guilty for not having started on any of the work you still had to get done for Monday morning. You could relax, taking time for yourself.

“Is this seat taken?”

You glanced up, expecting someone looking to steal the other seat and take it to their table. Instead, green eyes were looking down at you, pretty pink lips curling up into a half smile. Casey Novak, in jeans and a t-shirt, hair pulled back, was standing before you in the morning light, looking like a dream come to life.

“Not at all,” you said.

She sat, legs spreading just enough to make you wonder if she was doing it on purpose. Leaning back in the chair, her eyes slid over you, leaving fire in their wake. You took a slow slip from your coffee, tongue dragging over your lower lip as you put the cup down.

“Is there something I can do for you, ADA Casey Novak?” you asked when her gaze darkened.

“You can start by just calling me Casey,” she said.

She thanked the waiter as he placed a coffee in front of her. You watched her take her first sip, her eyes closing in bliss. She placed the cup down again, turning that burning gaze on you.

“So what do you want, Casey?” you asked.

“Knowing your name would be a start,” she said.

The way it sounded on her lips as she repeated it made you shiver. Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip again and you saw her focus on it, leaning forward slightly. The heat that went through you was searing and the throb was insistent, keeping time with your racing heart.

This was dangerous.

“Judge Donnelly is very determined to keep us from running into one another,” she said, a soft hum of a voice.

“So you thought you’d hunt me down to see what all the fuss is about?” you asked.

“Call it a happy coincidence. I was passing by, you happened to be here, no planning involved,” she said, “so your aunt can’t crucify me for taking the opportunity to say hello.”

“Do you always do what you’re told not to do?” you asked, tilting your head towards her.

“Not always. Only if it sounds fun,” she said, her smirk making your heart flutter. This felt too much like flirting.

“You’re going to get me in trouble, ADA Casey Novak,” you said, leaning away from her.

“Nothing wrong with a little trouble,” she said.

Certainly not when trouble looked like a smirking Casey Novak.

“And besides, who needs to know? I don’t see you ratting us out to Donnelly,” she said.

Her fingers brushed over the back of your hand, sending sparks up your arm. Your lips parted as your hand flipped, offering her your palm. They traced over it, the feeling of her touch burning through you. You weren’t proud of yourself for giving in so easily, but pretty women had always been your downfall.

“I promised her,” you whispered.

“We’re not doing anything. It’s just coffee,” she said, the definition of temptation.

“You’re used to getting your way, aren’t you?”

“I’m used to getting what I want,” she said and you found it intoxicating the way her eyes smouldered as they looked at you.

“I suppose she didn’t say anything about not having coffee together,” you said slowly.

Her satisfaction was obvious in the smug set of her shoulders. You laughed and something in her face brightened.

“What are you reading?” she asked, nodding down to your book as her finger continued to trace patterns into your palm.

“Frankenstein,” you said, nudging it closer to her, “I can’t read poetry every moment of every day.”

“Do you really recite it to pick up women?” she asked, picking up your old book, the spine cracked to the point it fell open in her hand.

“Thy soul was like a star and dwelt apart/thou hadst a voice whose sound was like the sea,” you recited to her.

You saw a flush bloom high on her cheeks, eyes sparkling as she seemed to lose whatever smart comeback she had. You grinned, hiding it behind your coffee cup, lowering your eyes in a show of false modesty. You liked seeing her a bit flustered, finding it enchanting.

“I suppose I can see the appeal,” she said eventually.

“Wordsworth has yet to fail me,” you said, fluttering your eyelashes at her.

She pushed your novel back across the table to you and then downed her coffee. Her fingers threaded through yours, palm to palm, making you feel like you were losing control of the situation already.

“Did your aunt happen to say anything about ice cream?” she asked.

You shook your head, teeth sinking into your lip again. She grinned, standing, pulling you with her.

“Then let me show you the best ice cream in the city,” she said.

Later, when she’d managed to convince you to return to her apartment with her, she tasted of danger. And trouble. And everything that could destroy you.

When you returned home early Monday morning you were buzzing. You could still feel her lips on your skin and her taste was burnt onto your tongue. Hickeys littered your body and you were deliciously sore. You still smelt like her and you wanted her perfume to linger on your skin for as long as possible.

Maybe Aunty Liz had been onto something about staying away from her.

When she called on Tuesday night you didn’t hesitate to pick up. Lying on your couch, drink in hand, you pressed the phone to your ear as her smokey voice whispered to you.

“Please tell me your day was better than mine,” she requested without even a hello.

“I suppose that depends on how your day was,” you said.

“My case got thrown out,” she said.

“That sucks. Sorry,” you said, “I had a student tell me that only men know how to write romantic poetry.”

“Do you write poetry?” she asked.

“Only of middling talent,” you replied, “nothing worth repeating.”

“I’m sure that’s not true. You are a doctor after all,” she said with a small laugh.

“That brag was for my aunt, not for you,” you replied but you were chuckling too.

“Lucky me for being in the room,” she said.

A knock sounded on your door.

“Hang on,” you said, standing up with a groan.

Pulling the door open you should have been expecting the woman on the other side of the door but you hadn’t been. Her lips pulled up into a smile and you held the door open wider for her. Her fingers brushed the back of your hand as she stepped inside.

“I’m going to have to call you back,” you said into the phone, “a devastatingly sexy woman just arrived.”

She tossed her cell phone on the couch with a laugh. Your hands landed on her hips, pushing her back until you had her pinned to the wall. Her hands cupping your cheeks dragged you up onto your toes to kiss her, long and slow and deep. She hummed into the kiss, the vibrations going through you.

“Make me forget my day,” she requested when you finally pulled away.

You dragged her to your room, more than happy to oblige. You lowered her onto the bed, crawling up her body. Your hands were seeking her skin, pushing up under the skintight turtleneck she had on. Just the sight of it was driving you crazy, remembering the feeling of her curves in her hands. You kissed her again, not able to stop yourself.

She sighed when you pulled her shirt over her head, your hands finding home on her skin. Your thumb brushed over her ribcage from your hand’s place on her waist. Your lips ghosted down her body, feeling her tremble.

“There witching beauty greets the ravished sight/more gentle than the arbitress night,” you whispered into her skin.

She made such a soft noise, one that suggested her chest was caving in. You brushed your lips over the curve of her breast, enjoying the way her breathy moan spurred you on. Wrapping your lips around one peaked nipple, you laved attention on her. She arched into your, fingers winding though your hair. As you sucked, your name fell like a curse from her lips.

Your fingers were quick as they unbuttoned her slacks. Slipping your hand into her panties, you stroked through her folds. Her hips pressed up against your hand, wordlessly begging for more. You kissed across to the other breast, finding the yellowing hickey you’d left only a few days ago. With your tongue, you circled her other hardening nipple, teeth grazing over it for a moment.

“You’re so good at that,” she groaned, fingers tightening in your hair.

You grinned against her as you finger found her clit. Her breathy sigh was gratifying in ways you couldn’t put into words. Slowly, you kissed down her chest, hand slipping from her panties as you grasped her hips. You dragged her slacks down long legs you still remembered curling around you on the weekend.

“You’re so beautiful,” you said, looking up her body.

Your mouth made contact with her throbbing cunt. Keeping a tight hold on her hips, you pressed closer, tongue sweeping through her folds. You moaned at her taste, still addicted to it, the novelty of having her like this not yet having worn off. Staring up your body, you watched as her eyes squeezed closed, fingers fisting in your comforter.

Your tongue dipped into her entrance and a shaky curse fell from her lips. She was so beautiful as her face contorted with pleasure. Wrapping your lips around her bundle of nerves, you suckled as she whimpered above you. You held her in place, refusing to let her use you the way she wanted. You were going to take care of her.

Lifting her legs over your shoulders, you pressed her into the mattress. You couldn’t get enough of her, wanting to spend hours with her doing this. When she came, it was with your name on her lips, the sound of it going right through you.

You were slow to kiss back up her body, finding her lips waiting for you. She kissed you with an enthusiasm that had you groaning. Flipping you, she gazed down at you, lips pulling up into a smirk that was growing familiar.

“You’re entirely too clothed,” she murmured.

“You’d better do something about that then,” you said.

The next morning you woke with her arm flung around your waist and her face buried in your neck. It wasn’t a conscious decision to begin running your fingers through her hair, but when she pressed closer with a soft sigh you didn’t feel the need to stop. You closed your eyes again, nose burying in her hair, breathing in the scent of her perfume again.

“I need to get up,” she mumbled, lips brushing your skin.

“Don’t,” you whispered, “stay.”

“I can’t,” she said, “I need to go fight for my case to be reinstated.”

“You can do that?” you asked.

“If the detectives have found new evidence,” she replied, slow to sit up.

Your eyes tracked over the swathes of skin on display, feeling your mouth water. Something about Casey was addictive to you, making you desperate for more even after hours spent indulging in her body the night before.

“So committed,” you murmured, fingers tracing down her spine, “that’s pretty fucking hot.”

She turned, looking over her shoulder at you. Dark eyes swept over your body, half exposed from where the covers had pooled around her hips. You arched your back, offering more to her gaze.

“And if I win and this rapist goes behind bars, I’ll come back to celebrate with you,” she said.

“Promise?” You tried to smoulder, the way she did that made you feel electric.

She smiled, leaning own to press her lips to yours.

“Promise,” she whispered against your mouth.

She called you by the end of the week. You dressed up all pretty, in a nice dress and a nice pair of heels, hoping to make her head spin the ways yours always did. Meeting her at the restaurant, your breath caught at the sight of the smile she gave you. Then it moved double time as an appreciative look came into her eye.

“If this is what I get for winning a case, I think my conviction rate will go up,” she said, gaze slow to move down your body and then up again before meeting your eye, “you look breathtaking.”

You took her in, the silk dress clinging to her curves, her hair swept up in an elegant undo. Green was certainly her colour. Reaching out, your finger ran along the chain of the necklace she was wearing, watching the way a flush rose to her cheeks.

“You shouldn’t be allowed out like this,” you murmured.

“You don’t like how I look tonight?” she asked.

“I like it entirely too much,” you said, finger stopping at the base of her throat, “the things I want to do to you…”

“There’ll be plenty of time for that later,” she chuckled, “patience, sweetheart.”

“I can be patient,” you replied.

“I suppose we’ll see, won’t we?”

Seated across from her, it was hard to look away. Her foot brushed your calf, sending a jolt through you. The way she was looking at you over her menu suggested you were what she was hoping to devour. You’d let her.

Placing your order, she took you through the trail, her voice soothing where the details were traumatic. Her foot kept bumping against yours under the table and each time her lips would quirk up. You found yourself leaning towards her, not able to stop yourself. Her gravity seemed only to affect you.

“But you didn’t ask for a blow by blow of the case,” she said, shaking her head after the food was placed down in front of you.

“I like listening to you,” you said.

“You do?” she asked, a surprise look crossing her face.

“Is that really so surprising?” Your fingertips brushed the back of her hand before retracting, “you have a way with words and the kind of voice I could listen to for hours.”

Something broke over her face, cracking open into a look of wonder. Your breath caught, not sure what to do with such a lovely expression on such a beautiful face. It was baffling that you could bring that out in someone like her.

“I’m beginning to see why your aunt wanted to keep us apart,” she said.

“What do you mean?” That was not what you were expecting to say.

“She knew I’d never let you go once I had you,” she said.

Your face softened into a smile. Reaching across the table, you threaded your fingers through hers, enjoying the feel of skin against skin. Her fingers tightened around yours, squeezing for a moment before she released you, beginning to eat.

“And here I was thinking the poetry was the way to seduce you, not the compliments,” you said, picking up your own fork, “might have to switch tracks if I want to keep you around.”

“I like the poetry,” she said, eyes darting up to you.

“And if I was reciting it to someone else…?” you prompted, wondering what was going through her head.

“Are you?” she asked, her gaze sharpening.

“Would it matter if I was?” you asked in response.

“I don’t like to share,” she said, her voice lowering, making you press your thighs together.

You took a slow sip from the wine she’d ordered. Her eyes darkened, lips pursing in a way that suggested you might be in trouble.

“So tell me, sweetheart, have you been reciting your poetry to someone else?” she asked.

“Not recently,” you said.

“How long?” she asked, and you were worried you were walking a razor edge with her.

“A few months,” you replied.

“What happened a few months ago?” she asked but you saw her lips begin to curl up into a small smile.

“I met a beautiful ADA and despite trying to be good, she was very convincing in tempting me to be naughty,” you replied.

She lent forward, her hand finding yours again. Tugging it up, her lips pressed a lingering kiss to your skin, making your breath catch. Your foot bumped hers under the table.

“Do you regret it?” she asked.

“I’m not sure I could ever regret you, Casey Novak,” you replied.

“So you don’t want to stop?” she asked.

“When Aunty Liz finds out, we’ll deal with the fallout then,” you said.

“When?” She raised an eyebrow at you.

“If you’re planning on never letting me go, it’ll have to come out eventually. We can’t keep it a secret forever,” you said.

“Eventually.” Her lips pressed to the back of your hand again, “but for now I want to keep you all to myself.”

The thought was pleasing. You held her gaze for a long moment, the weight of it all crashing into you. Your heart thumped in your chest, tripping over itself. You saw possibilities sparkling in her eyes, and the potential future you could build spiralling out before you.

“Who from the cup of amorous delight/dashes the sparkling draught of brilliant delight,” you murmured before taking a sip from your glass of wine. The way she looked at you was like you were something from out of space, beautiful and wonderful and completely unknowable. It was a heady mix.

She didn’t let you return home all weekend.

You slipped back into the monotony of your work come Monday, working through what you should have done on the weekend. It had been easy to forget the stack of papers you had to mark when her mouth was on you and you were gasping her name. It should have scared you, how easy it was to lose yourself in her, but you’d known the first time you’d seen her that she could render you into nothing. You welcomed it.

On Wednesday morning, when a note was sitting on your desk, you rolled your eyes. Curt, to the point, three words that gave you all you needed to know. You put it aside, booting up your computer.

Your aunt didn’t bother standing as you slid into the chair across from her. The food in front of you was what you’d always ordered, your favourite thing on the menu. Especially when she was buying.

“You summoned?” you said, raising an eyebrow at her.

“I haven’t heard from you in a while. I was worried you’d gotten yourself into trouble,” she said.

“I don’t remember you being my parol officer,” you said, taking a bite of your lunch.

“Nothing you feel the need to tell me?” she asked.

“How about you just tell me what’s on your mind and then I can tell you. Or not, depending what it is,” you said with a wicked grin and a small shrug.

“You always go to work with a hickey on your neck?” she asked.

“Only if I had fun the night before,” you said, which you had.

“Do I want to know?” she asked.

“Are you asking for details about my sex life, Aunty Liz?” you shot back.

“Please, I’m trying to eat,” she said, indicating her soup.

“Don’t ask if you don’t want to know,” you said, “so why did you really ask me for lunch?”

“It’s my duty to check in on you. If not, who knows what kind of trouble you’ll get into,” she said.

“Don’t pretend, I know you care. You worry about me.”

She didn’t answer but you knew the truth.

“Are you going to tell me about the girl who’s giving you fun nights?” she asked after a moment of silence.

“Eventually, I’m sure,” you said with a small shrug, knowing you couldn’t tell her, “all you need to know is right now I’m very happy.”

“Clearly.” Her gaze lingered on the hickey you hadn’t bothered covering up that morning, “you know, you’re not the only one who’s coming to work looking less than presentable.”

“You got something to tell me, Aunty Liz?” you poked, trying not to grin at her like a menace. Her beleaguered sigh only made your grin grow.

“ADA Novak has worn the same outfit twice in a row more than once over the last few weeks. Right around the time you stopped calling me incessantly,” she said.

“Lucky girl,” you said.

“And you know nothing about it?” she asked.

“I made you a promise,” you said.

“So it’s just a coincidence?” Her penetrating gaze made you shift in your seat. You’d never been good at lying to her.

“Seems like it.” You looked down at your food, “it’s not a shock two hot women happen to both be getting laid.”

“Okay, you can stop.”

“Good because neither of us is enjoying this,” you said.

She was more than happy to drop the topic. You moved on to much nicer things, like work and how your mother was repainting her kitchen much to your father’s annoyance. She had strong opinions on your sister’s latest boyfriend. You did too.

It was easier when you weren’t talking about Casey.

You started being more careful. You kept the hickeys to places you couldn’t see with your clothes on. She left early enough to get home or brought a change of clothes with her. And you made sure you were never seen anywhere your aunt might be.

Mostly, you spent time in her apartment, curled up in the bubble of the whole thing. You couldn’t understand why your aunt had been so against you seeing her. Everything about her was wonderful, and you’d never felt so sure about a decision before.

“Listen to this,” you said, looking over the top of one of the essays you were marking, “‘he made nature a woman because as everyone knows women are weak and they break under the passion of a man’s love.’ Can you believe that?”

“Yes,” she said, “you should hear some of the stuff men say to justify what they do.”

“I couldn’t do your job,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“That’s why I do it, and why you talk about poetry all day,” she said.

“Is that judgement I hear?”

You placed the essay down, crawling towards her on the couch on all fours. She lent back, watching you with the kind of look in her eye that made you want to submit to her. Her legs spread, offering you the perfect place to stop. Your hands on her knees helped you to push up, drawing closer to her.

“Do you think I don’t have a real job?” you asked, “that I’m just a silly artist who contributes nothing to society?”

“You contribute plenty,” she said, one hand gently cupping your jaw, forcing you to look up at her.

“Do I?” you asked.

“Keeping me happy makes me better at my job. You do your part in putting away all the bad guys,” she said, slow to lean towards you.

“Better make sure you’re on top form tomorrow then, hadn’t I?”

Your marking could wait.

Casey let you stay at her place when your heating went out in the middle of winter break. Curled up in her bed, book in hand, half sprawled against the headboard, you let the hours pass. The door opened and closed again. Looking up, your eyes itched and you realised it had gotten later than you’d expected.

“Hey,” you said when Casey appeared in the doorway.

She looked exhausted, the slope of her shoulders, her heavy footsteps. Your heart ached for her. Her fingers weren’t careful as she unbuttoned her blouse, dropping her slacks to the floor. You still stared every time you saw her naked body, not quite believing you were allowed to see it. She was so beautiful.

She wiggled under the covers, depositing herself on top of you. Her arms curled around your waist, cold hands pressing to your skin as the buried under your sweater. Her face was buried in your neck. With your free hand you stroked a long line down her spine before curling your arm around her waist, feeling her let out a long sigh.

“Long day?” you murmured, lips brushing against her temple.

“Don’t want to talk about it,” she replied, muffled against your neck, arms tightening around you.

“Okay,” you said

In a soft voice, you began reading your book out loud to her until her breathing began to even out. It took a while, her muscles slow to relax. You would read to her all night if it would help, whatever she needed. When she finally dropped off, you gazed down at her, finding yourself enraptured. This was the kind of moment you made sure was burned into your memory.

You ignored the way she made you feel. You pushed away the thought that you were falling for this woman. Even as you knew it was true.

The wolf whistle that passed through your lips was loud. You grinned when Casey’s steps faltered, her eyes seeking you out. She sauntered towards you, an extra swing to her hips when she found you. Leaning back against the pillar you’d been waiting against, you watched her, not even bothering to hide your appreciation.

“I thought I saw you earlier,” she said, coming to a stop in front of you.

“I had to drop something off with my aunt. Thought I’d sneak a glimpse when I got the chance,” you said.

“And?” Her head tilted to the side, crowding you against the pillar without touching you.

“And I think you’re something amazing,” you replied.

Her free hand reached out, fingers tangling with yours.

“Bit risky doing this when your aunt is just inside,” she said.

“She’s stuck in court for the next little while,” you said, “plus, it’s been months and she hasn’t brought it up again. I think we’re in the clear.”

“Lucky us,” she said.

“So can I take you to lunch?” you asked.

“Are you sure that’s wise?” she asked.

“I’m not sure I care,” you replied, then decided to pull out the big guns, “a poet could not but be gay/in such jocund company.”

Your fingertips brushed over her cheekbone.

“Fine, but you’re paying,” she said.

You took it as a win.

You gasped for breath, falling forward onto your elbows. The only sound was the slap of skin and your breathless moans. Casey’s hands were tight on your hips, leaving bruises on your skin. You pressed your hips back, your whines asking for more.

“You like that, sweetheart?” Casey asked, dragging her strap out of you.

“Uh huh,” was all you managed to say.

“Perfect little toy for my cock,” she said, slamming back into you.

You cried out as she hit that place inside of you that made you see heaven. Her name was nothing but a prayer on your lips.

“You were made for this, weren’t you?” she said, “God made you just for me to fuck.”

Her thrusts became rougher, harder, making you see stars. You were so close, feeling the wave about to crash into you. Your entire body was a live wire, every thrust making your head spin.

A loud banging on your door had Casey freezing.

“Ignore it. Whoever it is will go away,” you said, breathless and desperate.

She waited a moment for the knocking to stop before she slowly retracted from you before slowly pushing back in. Your whimper was pathetic, making her chuckle as she readjusted her hold on you.

The banging started on your door again.

Casey sighed, pulling full out of you. You growled, turning, the liquid heat in your veins calling out for more. The throbbing was unbearable. You’d been so close.

“Go handle that, sweetheart,” she said, running a hand through her hair, “then I’ll take care of you.”

You grumbled as you rose onto unsteady legs. Wrapping your robe around your naked body, you did your best to stride towards the door. Pulling it open, you were brought up short at the woman on the other side.

“Don’t tell me you were still in bed,” your aunt said.

“Okay. I won’t tell you,” you replied.

You glanced back over your shoulder, clutching your robe tighter around you.

“Are you going to invite me in?” she asked, her expectant look making you freeze.

“I wasn’t expecting you, Aunty Liz. I’m not exactly set up for company,” you replied.

“Or at least not company you have to be dressed for,” she said.

“What are you doing here?”

She pushed past you into your apartment. You were slow to close the door, hoping she’d leave, still feeling the slickness between your thighs begging you to go back to Casey and finish what you’d started. Her eyes slowly took in your place, lingering on the two cups of coffee on your counter.

“Am I finally going to meet your mystery woman?” she asked, turning to look at you.

“No,” you said, “did you need something or were just hoping to cock block me?”

“You’ve been dodging your mother’s calls. Call her back so she stops bugging me,” she said.

“Sorry. She just won’t shut up about redoing the living room and there’s only so long I can discuss the merits of eggshell vs seashell,” you said, running your fingers through your messy hair.

“Just call her,” she said, “I’d like not to repeat this experience.”

“That makes two of us,” you muttered.

The bedroom door was pulled open and your heart stopped in your chest. Both you and your aunt were slow to turn to the figure that had frozen in the doorway. Casey, wrapped in a sheet, cheeks still flushed and eyes wide, was staring back.

“Uh… it’s not what it looks like?” you tried when you got your voice back.

The look she gave you was withering. You shrunk under it, knowing the game was up. There was no talking your way out of this. Her jaw clenched and the tension in her body was enough to snap.

“I believe you gave me a promise,” she said, voice cold enough to give you hypothermia.

“I’m sorry,” you said, voice shrinking under her glare, “it just kind of… happened.”

“And when I asked you about it, you lied right to my face,” she said.

“What was I meant to do? You were so determined I should have nothing to do with her. An opinion I don’t understand and certainly don’t share,” you said, knowing you were sounding like the petulant teenager who had been dumped on her all those years ago.

“You don’t have to share my opinion but you gave me your word,” she said.

“Don’t blame her,” Casey said, finally stepping into the room properly, “I started this.”

“You also gave me your word,” she said, turning on her, eyes flashing dangerously.

“That’d ridiculous. You can have a say in my personal life but one of your ADAs? Seriously, Aunt Liz?” you demanded, “that’s gotta be some kind of abuse of power.”

“Don’t start,” she snapped.

“It’s fine,” Casey said to you.

“No. It’s totally an infringement on your rights. She can’t ask that of you,” you said.

“Sweetheart, she didn’t ask me as my boss,” she said.

“Fine, then I’ll be angry about it on my behalf. You can ask me but not other people,” you said, rounding on your aunt.

“Did you ever think that maybe I had good reason for telling you to stay away from her?” your aunt asked.

“So why did you?” you asked.

Her eyes flicked to Casey who was looking between the two of you like she was desperate to leave this situation. You shook your head, turning away from her.

“It doesn’t matter. What’s done is done and unfortunately for you we’re happy together. I think it’s time for you to leave,” you said, gesturing back towards the door, “I’ll talk to Mom.”

You didn’t bother looking at her as she left your apartment, the door loud in the silence left in her wake. Your stomach was unsettled, a toxic mix of anxiety and anger, and all you could do was stare at Casey. The color had drained from her face and there was nothing you could do.

“Kind of a mood killer, huh?” you said, hoping to break the tension.

“I should probably go,” she said before disappearing back into your bedroom.

“What? No.” You followed her, “you don’t have to. We don’t have to let her ruin our weekend.”

She didn’t look at you as she dragged her clothes back onto her body. A chill went over you, leaving you off balance and unsure. All you could do was watch as she put herself back together.

“I’ll call you,” she said, hand gently cupping your chin as she kissed your cheek.

The door slammed shut behind her and you fell back onto your mattress, the first tear falling. You’d known it was going to be awful when Liz found out, but you hadn’t thought Casey would be sent running. You’d stupidly assumed her feelings were strong enough to take the hit of your aunt’s disappointment.

She never called.

You kept to yourself for a few weeks, waiting, hoping she’d come back. Any time you called her it went to voicemail and she never called back. You stayed home, ordering takeout you didn’t want and left mostly uneaten. You curled up on the couch, stumbling through the days, wondering what you’d done wrong. Because you must have done something wrong for her to disappear from your life like that.

It took a lot of pride for you to drag your overwrought body over to your aunt’s. It was late enough you thought she’d be at home, but your knocks went unanswered. Sinking down onto her front steps, you lent against the ice cold metal of the handrail debating letting yourself freeze to it. It would be easier than continuing on in the hole you’d found yourself in.

“You make a sad sight.”

You blinked up at the woman towering over you. With a sigh, you hauled yourself to your feet, using the handrail to hold yourself up. Your aunt considered you for a moment before pushing past you to unlock her front door.

“You’d better come in,” she said, “can’t have you freezing to death out here.”

You trudged after her, letting yourself be enveloped in the familiar home you’d spent so many hours in. Her steady hand on your shoulder pushed you down onto her couch, disappearing out the back into where you knew the kitchen was.

A warm mug was placed in you hands, painful against your frozen fingers. You sighed, staring down into the steaming tea, the same brand she’d been stocking for you since you started sleeping over when life got too much for you.

“I sense I’m going to regret this, but do you want to talk?” she asked, lowering into the leather armchair that felt synonymous with her.

“Why didn’t you want me to pursue Casey?” you asked.

You’d been wrong. Your aunt always had a reason for asking things of you and she’d yet to be wrong. This was all your fault by not listening to her. So you had to know why she’d been so adamant this time.

“What’s happened?” she asked in return.

“I haven’t heard from her since you found out. She won’t take my calls. She won’t come see me. So I guess it’s over. I should have listened to you,” you said, staring down into your mug of tea. You took a slow sip. It was the same thing that had been going through your head for days now.

“Yes, you should have.” Your head snapped up to her.

“You knew this would happen?” you asked.

“I knew Casey Novak is a heartbreaker. She’s beautiful and smart and passionate. Makes her a damn good ADA. But the moment I saw the way she was looking at you I knew she was interested. And the way you looked at her said you were too,” she said, “you’ve never been able to lie to me.”

“So why did you tell me to stay away from her?” you asked.

“I think you forget I know you. She’s the exact kind of woman you’d destroy yourself for. I didn’t want to see you get your heart broken,” she said and you were surprised by how soft she could make her voice.

“So it wasn’t because you didn’t want me to distract your best prosecutor?” you asked.

“Distract her. Break her heart. I don’t care. It’s your heart I was trying to protect,” she replied.

“So much for that.” You slumped back, staring into your mug like it held all the answers, “I really fell for her.”

“I know you did,” she said.

“When you brought her up over lunch all those months ago…?” you asked, finally looking up at her again, realising what she’d said about lying.

“I knew you were lying to me. Foolishly, I thought it would lose its charm if I stop telling you what to do. I should have known better,” she said.

“I really thought she was falling for me too.”

And then the tears came. Your Aunt Liz had never been a cuddler, but the squeeze of her arm around you and her steady shoulder beneath your head was exactly what you needed. She let you cry until there were no more tears and then sent you upstairs to bed.

By the morning you felt a smidge better. Less pathetic at least. You stayed the weekend with her, reverting back to your teenage self, letting someone else look after you for once. And so you called out sick on Monday and followed her to work.

Her sharp look was all the opinion she was going to give you. After you’d told her your plan the night before she’d made her disapproval clear. But you needed to do it. For your own peace of mind.

Slipping into Casey’s office, you shut the door with a quiet click. Your heart squeezed as she looked up at you. The expression that went over her face would be enough to bring the tears on again if you hadn’t done your best to harden yourself to her. But there were dark circles under her eyes and it looked like she hadn’t slept since you’d last seen her.

“Hi,” you said, leaning back against her door.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“You never called.”

Green eyes darted away from you, the hands clasped on her desk tightening. You’d grown used to reading her body language and this was not a good sign.

“Look, I don’t know what you’re thinking, but if you wanted to end things I wish you’d just told me,” you said, leaving the safety of the door, “I mean, I got the message but it would have been nice if you could have just said something.”

“I’m sorry,” she said on a sigh.

You stared up at the ceiling, doing your best to keep from exploding your emotions all over her office. You heard the scrape of her chair pushing back. You focused on the light hanging above.

“Hope is a thing with feathers/that perches in the soul/and sings the tune without the words/and never stops at all,” you whispered.

A broken breath passed through parted lips. You inhaled sharply, turning your gaze back to her. Her eyes were swimming with an emotion you couldn’t name, tears welling, threatening to fall. You shook your head, looking down to your fingers, twisting together until you thought they might break under the strain.

“I really thought you liked me,” you said, “enough to handle my aunt’s disapproval. But I guess I was the idiot who fell for someone who didn’t feel the same.”

She stayed silent.

“She finally told me why she didn’t want us to get together. She knew you were going to break my heart. Next time I think about ignoring her advice I’ll come back to this moment,” you said.

She was still staring at you in silence. You shook your head looking away, disappointment welling in you again.

“That’s all I wanted you to know. I’ll leave you alone now.”

You turned to go, your sigh heavy. You should have expected this. She couldn’t even handle having a conversation to end things with you. As if she was going to say anything when you tried to have one. Still, at least you got it off your chest. That was really all you wanted to do. Your hand landed on the doorknob.

“Wait!”

You froze, not used to hearing such desperation in her voice. The ache in your chest only got worse. You didn’t turn around, but you didn’t turn the doorknob either, hung between one decision and the next.

“I’m sorry,” she said again, and you could just imagine the tear spilling down her cheek. You squeezed your eyes shut.

“I wanted to call. I did. But…” You heard her take a deep breath in, “I’m not good when it becomes real.”

“What does that mean?” You turned, surprised at the spike of anger you felt making your heart beat double time.

“It means the last time I let myself fall in love in went badly. He… It’s not important, but I haven’t been able to let myself get that vulnerable again,” she said, looking at you like that explained everything.

“So this was nothing but a bit of fun for you?” you asked, “you never cared about me?”

“No!” Her hands grasped your forearm, the first touch of bare skin you’d had from her in weeks making your head spin, “no. Maybe that’s how it started but no.”

“Then make it make sense, Casey. If it mattered to you then why did you disappear? Why did you do this?” you demanded.

“Because I cared.”

She thrust her fingers into the front of her hair, gripping at the roots. She turned away from you, the anguish clear on her face. It was like a punch to the gut, sending you reeling. Your shoulders slumped, staring at her as she paced. The impulse to reach out and comfort her was still strong. You hated yourself for it.

“Look, I could ignore the way I was falling for you when it was just us. I could lie to myself and say it was just sex. That I didn’t want more. But then Donnelly was there and you were trying to protect me and I knew. I knew I was in love with you,” she said and you felt your heart break right there in her office.

“You were a coward,” you said, and it wasn’t nice but it was true.

“I was,” she agreed, “I didn’t want to hurt you but I didn’t know how to handle it.”

“You said you’d never let me go,” you said.

“A good line I thought would make you smile,” she said, shaking her head, “I didn’t expect you to actually want it.”

“Do you still love me?” you asked.

“What?” Her brow furrowed.

“After all this, do you still love me?” you asked.

“Does it matter?” she asked in return.

“Just answer the damn question.” You hadn’t expected to get angry but she jumped as you raised your voice.

“Yes,” she said, her voice breathless.

“Good.”

Your hands landed on her hips, forcing her back against her desk. Her lips parted and a flush bloomed over her cheeks. Pushing up onto your toes, your lips ghosted over hers.

“That I did always love/I bring thee proof,” you murmured.

You kissed her then and her whimper was music to your ears. Her arms came up around you, hands pressing between your shoulder blades, keeping you pressed against her. Your tongue swept into her mouth, needing this more than you’d realised. You’d thought this was the end. Instead, warmth was blooming in your chest and you felt giddy as you kissed her deeper. You couldn’t get close enough to her.

She drew back, breath heaving, eyes still closed. You ran your fingertips along her lower lip. She pressed a kiss to them before her eyes slowly blinked open.

“I know you’re scared, and I know you think you’re not good at this, but I’m not letting you go without a fight. I love you, ADA Casey Novak,” you said.

“Just Casey,” she whispered, voice breaking, a tear slipping free.

You wiped it away, then the next and the one after that.

“I don’t deserve you,” she said.

“No, you don’t,” you said, sliding your fingers into her hair, “but lucky for you I’m pigheaded and I’m used to getting what I want. Sound familiar?”

Her chuckle was wet but she pinched your side until you laughed too. She lent forward, forehead pressing to yours. Your hands slid around to interlock at the small of her back.

“So will you pick up when I call you tonight?” you asked.

“I’ll do you one better.” She cupped both your cheeks, tipping your face up towards her, “I’ll give you my spare key and you can be waiting for me when I get home.”

You kissed her again, not able to help yourself. Possibilities tasted so much better when they were coming true.

[akesdraws-blog]

Finding one of the turtles asleep on the couch

Version: 🎞️TMNT Bayverse🎞️

Who hasn't fallen asleep on the couch at some point? It happens to all of us, it could even happen to turtles.

⚔️Leonardo🍵

Like Donnie, it is very strange to see him asleep on the couch, but not impossible.

But for what you want, don't walk near this turtle if you see him collapsed on the couch.

Maybe you will say, why?

Well, Leo usually falls asleep on the couch only when he had a specifically heavy patrol and was also punished in the Hashi, and maybe you will say, What's wrong with that? Well, Leo ends a a little more tired than normal, which causes him to fall asleep, but also his reflexes to take over.

That's how it is.Walking near Leo when he is like this will probably only cause some accidental bumps. (Almost all in the abdomen and legs)

Casey was unlucky to find out after spending almost half an hour writhing in pain on the floor while he hugged his aching stomach.

Only Splinter is able to wake him up to go sleep in her room. (He is the only one with enough reflexes to avoid a blow)

Another thing, although it may not seem like it, Leo would be the guy with a very heavy sleep, Mikey could be playing his drums with all his energy, Donnie could be using one of his loudest tools, even Raph could be using the blender to prepare his protein shake, no one knows how Leo can sleep like that, but he'll wake up practically right away if a little bit of light hits his face.

🥊Raphael🧸

He is one of those most likely to see you asleep on the couch.

Maybe there was a “Fast and Furious” movie marathon.

But everyone will know he's in the room by the loud snoring that echoes through the sewer.

No matter how hard you try to wake him up, it's just not possible.

Raph will just say 5 more minutes and he'll fall asleep again.

Although he is also an honest grump.

You could ask him anything and he'll grumble back at you.

And he will literally say anything you ask him.

Last time Mikey asked if he loved him (at first he just wanted to see him frown and take a picture), and in response he received an honest reading of how much she adored his little brother, no matter how many times she made him angry. (Mikey almost cried after that)

While asleep he is so honest that sometimes his brothers use him as a kind of psychologist.

Leo even apologizes for the times they have fought, Donnie sometimes lets out some insecurities, Mikey just wants to hear his brother say that he loves him.

But changing the topic.

If you want to wake up this big turtle, just move one of his weights and he'll be there in a second.He does not like the weight to be modified or altered if he has not been notified beforehand.

Do it and he'll be checking every weight he has for about an hour.

⚛️Donatello ⚗️

Seeing him asleep is practically a miracle, because this adorable mad scientist doesn't sleep unless his body screams it at him.

So when you enter the lair and discover that the one on the couch is none other than Donnie, it's a huge surprise.

Of course, that also comes with certain caveats.

1. Don't try to wake him up or tell him to go to bed. (If you do, the thought of going back to sleep won't cross his mind again.)

2. Don't try to prank him when he's in that state. (Everyone learned the hard way that they shouldn't do it, and I'm talking about EVERYONE, even if you are their partner, revenge will come to you if you dare to do it)

3. Do not touch anything that has been left lying around.

The last one is the most important. Don't try to tidy it up, don't try to pick up the trash, don't even think about moving that plate with a half-eaten slice of pizza on it.

For heaven's sake, don't do it.

Because when Donnie wakes up and notices something different, he'll spend a full hour complaining that it wasn't a mess, it was a materialized brainstorm.

That's right, it seems that the empty soda can that Leo had thrown over had a purpose.

So if you don't want to have a dramatic Donnie, don't move anything around him.

🎉Michelangelo🍕

He is the one we will always see asleep on the couch.

Most likely, he tried to defeat a final boss from his most recent video game. (Courtesy of April)

So sometimes you could see his fingers move.

Donnie discovered that it was a combo that Mikey creates in his head and he writes it down so when Mikey wakes up he applies it. (And he copies it for when he wants to have an advantage)

But you should be careful if he stayed up late because of a horror movie marathon.

Because at any moment you can hear him screaming as loud as his lungs allow... and then he falls asleep again.

That's something everyone has experienced when Mikey is asleep after a horror movie.

Leo almost always loses his balance due to his brother's unexpected scream, but in the end he considers it as involuntary training for his reflexes.

Raph ends up breaking his comic book, or his water bottles burst from the force with which he crushes them in surprise.

Donnie ends up breaking his keyboard, or an experiment explodes.

°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•~°•

Hello everyone!, here returning from the lowest of my emotional state.

But here we are!

Tags: (Because it hasn't been tagged for a long time)

@turtle-babe83 . @dilucsflame33 . @thelaundrybitch . @scholastic-dragon . @leosgirl82 . @tmnt-tychou .@little-bunny-in-space . @happymoonangel . @lazyafgurl . @kikithedreamerwriter .@androidships007.

[imababblekat]

Scars That Bind

**WARNINGS**: implied ptsd, scarring, angst (but w/ happy ending)

~~~~~~~~

@httpvomitello ,"Hi Hi, how are you? So I was wondering if you could do a one shot with Donnie x f! reader who is his girlfriend. It would be after the event of the second film, where she helps with the fight and everything. However, she ends up with a big scar on her back, but she never got around to revealing it to the others because she was ashamed to show it, and because of that, in those weeks she almost didn't let Donnie touch her, whether it was a hug or a kiss. Until one day, he accidentally sees the scar, and after her explanation, he comforts her and things get better.

A/N: oh boy this is much longer than i had planned it to be! hope y'all still enjoy though! im just gonna go cry in a corner after having written this ╮(T▽T)╭

~xXx~

It had been weeks, and yet the events of the Kraang attacks still effected you. Effected your life. It hadn't been as often as early on, but you still had nightmares. Still awoke sweaty and fearful from a nightmare that played out way differently and more devastating than how the real battle had ended victoriously. Well, mostly victoriously. Yes, the four ninja brothers you had helped and fought alongside went home with some new scars that they would no doubt proudly brandish, but the one you took home made you feel anything but proud. Anything but strong like how the turtles felt about theirs.

The large, healed but still freshly ugly wound across your middle back would be a forever reminder of how things could have gone terribly wrong for you that day. You were lucky to make it out alive in the end, but you had not only been physically scarred, but mentally as well.

What if you hadn't made it out of that slippery situation? What if it had happened and then Donnie, your everything, wouldn't have even known, to busy off fighting the big bad boss? How could you leave him, leave everyone, so suddenly in your foolishness to be more than what you were? A fragile human, trying to be a hero like her mutated boyfriend who had been training to fight his entire life?

The near death experience left you thinking and imaging the worst nearly every waking moment, and it seemed to effect more than just your lonesome. It had started to effect your relationship with Donnie. You can't remember the first moment it happened, but you remember every other time you had rejected his touches. The poor man couldn't get a kiss from you, much less a hug, and he had no idea why. The hurt in his eyes always tugged at your heart strings, but not as much as if he were to find out about the permanent alteration to your body.

If he found out, he would surely blame himself for not being there to protect you. Something you wanted him to not do. He along with his super brothers had more pressing things to be worried about, not a single human when they had the whole of New York on their shoulders. Your horrific dreams of death had also instilled in you that very great possibility of just how much danger you truly were in being with them. Yes, it was something that you had all known. April, Casey, and even Vern were just as in likely danger simply by being friends with the turtles, but no one really realizes the weight of something till it comes crashing down on them. Like it had to you.

If one day something happened to you, you didn't want to leave behind a deeply heartbroken and changed Donnie. Making distance would surely make such a casualty easier to deal with if there was nothing no longer there right?

Right?

You chocked on a sob, eyes screwed shut with clasped hands against your reddened face. The staggered cry quietly echoed off your bathroom walls, the only other sound being the slight slush of water in the tub you had planned to get into before you had caught a glance of the cursed marking on your back in the mirror. Now, you sat on the edge, trying your best to reason with your recent actions, but your heart and subconscious knew the truth and would not let you get away so easily.

Images of Donnie's hurt face only a couple hours ago still projected freshly in your mind. The pain in his eyes when you stepped back from his open embrace and rejected his goodbye kiss before you departed for home. You've seen the genius sad before, but never had you seen him so dejected. Knowing that you were the cause, hurt even more.

"But it's for his own good.", you sobbed aloud.

Than why did it feel so wrong?

Suddenly, something had fumbled and hit the tiled floor loudly, causing you to nearly jump out of your skin as you swiftly turned on the edge of the tub to see the last person you wanted to in this exact moment.

There, standing in the entrance straight as a pillar and eyes so wide they might pop out of his head, was Donatello. He had come to return back your phone, that of which he had called deciding it was finally time to talk about your standoff behavior towards him when it rang from the lair lounge. Now though, a call to work out the reason was no longer warranted, the off color patch of new skin and flesh on your back still crystal clear in his mind.

"I. . .", Donnie faltered, one usually a dictionary of speech, now speechless.

You on the other hand, were much more reactive. Your heart picking up pace, as you were quick to grab your towel and wrap it around, stepping out of your forgotten bath and racing to get out of this situation.

"I-I wondered if I had forgotten that, thanks Don, you can go-"

You had tried and failed to push your way past Donnie after swiftly grabbing your phone off the bathroom floor, but the turtle in purple was much faster and had grabbed hold of your arm just as you entered the hallway.

"How. . .how long have you. . .", Donnie swallowed, still struggling to find the words.

You felt your heart drop in your chest seeing the agony in Donnie's knowledgeable gaze.

"Donnie, please. . .", you mutter barely above a whisper, lip beginning to quiver.

"When you said you went to the hospital to check on a friend, did you really go for yourself?", he questioned, brows furrowed as he looked down at you, but you were careful to avoid his gaze.

You tried to pull your arm from his grasp, but Donnie held firm. He wasn't letting you go this time.

"(Y,n), please, I'm just trying to understand."

"There is nothing to understand.", you gritted out, angry with yourself for the tears that threatened to spill once again.

"How could you say that? You have a-"

"I know!", you finally snapped, glare flashing up towards Donatello.

Said turtle was stunned, but soon relaxed his expression, slowly letting go of your arm to take a step back. You cursed yourself internally, looking back to your hallway's carpet and holding yourself tight. A moment of tense silence befell the both of you, neither speaking and both refusing to look at the other. Your heart ached, and so did his, but it was not you who apologized first.

With a tight throat, Donnie was first to speak quietly.

"I'm sorry. . ."

"Don't say that.", you thought to yourself, another stinging pang shooting straight through your chest. Fighting back the urge to cry, you shook your head, chancing a glance at your slumped boyfriend.

"No. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. It's just. . ."

Donnie looked up just as you looked down the hall, but your gaze was else where. It was a look he was all to familiar with, one he'd seen after terrifying incidents he and his brothers had experienced.

"Is that why you've been so distant?"

By that, you knew Donatello meant your scar.

The reference broke you, nodding as you started to sob and weep, new tears making new streaks down your face. Donnie muttered a quiet 'oh', opening his arms as you quickly crossed the short distance to fall against his plastron. The moment his strong arms wrapped around you, your heart had exploded, cries racking your body as you sobbed loudly, not caring if the neighbors heard. It had been so long since you had embraced each other, since you had been this close to the person you fell so deeply in love with, that the sensation of Donnie holding you felt as though you had finally returned home after an arduous journey across rough seas.

The entire time you cried Donnie stood cradling you, rubbing your arms softly and murmuring quiet whispers of "its okay" and "let it out" against the top of your messy hair. Neither of you knew how much time had passed, Donnie undoubtedly willing to hold you up if your legs no longer could, but soon you had calmed, only letting out shaking breaths and a few soft sobs here and there. Once you felt you had regained enough strength you gingerly used Donnie's strong plastron as leverage to push your self back, just enough to still remain close but also peer up into his worried gaze.

"I'm sorry Donnie. I never wanted to hurt you. I was so scared about how something happening to me would effect you, when I've been causing you that pain this entire time. I'm so, so sorry Donnie.", you choked out, feeling as though you were ripping off a band-aid and at the same time having heavy weights lifted from your shoulders.

"Oh, (y,n).," Donnie muttered, reaching up to move a strand of hair from your sticky, tear stained face. "I only wish I had realized sooner what you were going through. You shouldn't have faced this alone. I should have been there to help."

You bit your bottom lip, shaking your head slowly.

"No Donnie, that's exactly part of why I acted the way I did. I don't want you to blame yourself for what happened."

Donnie's grip on you tightened, a pit forming in his chest. That scar. It grabbed him by the throat and had him in a choke hold the second he stepped into your bathroom. When had you gotten it during the Kraang attack? Were you alone the whole time? How did you get such a wound?

Donatello had to be quick to stop his thoughts before they spiraled into picturing unsavory images of just how exactly you had been hurt. He hated it, this revelation that something seriously bad had happened to the person he loved and he wasn't there to do anything about it. If he'd lost you, he'd surely would have lost himself.

Leaning forward with tightly shut eyes, holding back his own tears for your sake, Donnie's lips pressed firmly to your forehead before slowly pulling back. His beautiful gold eyes found yours, a comforting smile gracing his features as you tiredly peered back at him inquisitively.

"Sorry, dove. I can't say that I won't, but I promise I'll try to as long as you promise me something."

"Anything, Donnie."

"Promise me that you'll always remember I'm here for you. That you can come to me about anything, and to please let me help fight your battles with you, just as you so bravely have done for me."

Your lips formed into a smile, the first genuine one in who knows how long. Your head fell against Donnie's strong chest once more, your arms squeezing him this time and feeling your soul being filled with a warm, positive feeling for once as the tallest ninja turtle returned your embrace with just as much love.

"I promise.", you spoke just above where Donnie's heart lay protected by plastron, the feeling of another gentle, loving kiss being placed against the top of your hair.

~xXx~

[roosterforme]

The Younger Kind Part 34 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley convinces you to order a new bed by using an interesting tactic. And when you realize you were Bradley's first for something, you're already excited to find out if you can be his first again. Because he was yours, and with one simple word, Noah had you wrapped around his tiny fingers even more.

Warnings: Angst, swearing, fluff, spanking, smut, and age gap (18+)

Length: 5500 words

Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader

Check out my masterlist for more! The Younger Kind masterlist.

After work on Friday, Bradley picked Noah up on his way home. Casey tried to talk his ear off when he arrived at the daycare center. She seemed pleased that Bradley was alone today, and she pulled the clipboard away from him with a smirk when he tried to take it from her to sign it. 

"I was wondering if you wanted to grab dinner with me tonight? Or another night?" she asked, and Bradley just stared at her. "Us and Noah, of course."

She was probably the same age as you. Maybe he'd been giving Casey some sort of hope when he'd wrapped his arms around you yesterday. But even if he were single, he wouldn't go for someone who worked where Noah went to school. "I have a girlfriend, Casey. You've met her several times. She's on my approved list of people who are allowed to take Noah home."

With a sigh she set the clipboard down in front of him. "I didn't know it was serious."

"It's serious," he promised as he scribbled down his name on the correct line. And then without another word, she went to retrieve Noah for him. It was unbelievable. Suddenly, because of you, Bradley was appealing to younger women. And you were obviously appealing to everyone, including Beau Simpson. Every time Bradley saw him at work, he smirked at the admiral. That man wanted you that night at the bar, but you were Bradley's. He could get hard for you just thinking about it. 

"Daddy!" shouted Noah as he ran across the small lobby. 

"Hey, Bub." Bradley scooped him up and got a kiss.

"Where's Princess? I like it when you pick me up together."

Bradley shifted his gaze to Casey as he said, "Let's go home and get her."

"Do you think she made ants on logs for me?" Noah asked as Bradley carried him outside.

Bradley kissed his son and said, "I think there's a good possibility."

Before he started the engine, he texted you and let you know that Noah was asking for you and for his favorite treat. Your response left him aching to get home as quickly as possible.

My Princess: Of course I made him some ants. I know what you boys like. Dinner is nearly ready, too. Can't wait to see you Daddy.

When he finally rushed in the front door in his flight suit with Noah in his arms, you were there in the living room, ready to greet both of them.

"Princess!" Noah gushed, climbing from Bradley's arms to yours. "I made you a painting of a dinosaur in a crown."

You kissed his cheek and said, "I absolutely need to see it right now."

So Bradley pulled it out of the backpack with a smile on his face, even though you'd completely ditched him in favor of kissing Noah. Because he loved the way you interacted with his son. 

You gasped when he held it up and said, "Noah! It's perfect! Let's hang it on the refrigerator." It actually just looked like some green and purple blobs, but you took it from Bradley's hand anyway as you whispered, "Hi, Daddy."

"Hey, Baby." Bradley had a lot of things in mind for you, but none of them were really appropriate at this moment, so he just gave you a soft kiss and followed you to the kitchen.

---------------------------

After Noah was in bed, you changed into one of Bradley's soft shirts and a cute pair of your underwear. You finally felt like your things were organized neatly in his house and his bedroom. Your house... your bedroom. Just thinking about it made you smile. But the bed needed to go. You'd spent a good portion of your day looking for a new one online, but everything seemed so expensive.

"Why do you look upset?" Bradley asked when he walked in, fresh out of the shower. He removed the towel from his waist and used it to dry his hair. Even when he wasn't hard, he looked huge, and you bit your lip in need. 

"I'm not upset," you insisted, closing the distance to him. "Just annoyed at the price of a new bed."

Bradley ran his index finger along your lip. "You have your pretty purple princess credit card. Use it. I agree, we should have a new bed."

You kissed his finger before you said, "The one I like is over a thousand dollars."

"Princess. You know by now that I'm not going to get mad if you spend money. Thank you for giving me a heads up about the price of the bed," he said, voice deep and raspy. "It sounds fine to me."

When you tucked your face against his warm chest, you whispered, "Thank you, Daddy."

One of his big hands trailed down your back until he was cupping your butt and playing with your lace thong. He slid his index finger inside the elastic, and your nipples got hard as he ran his finger slowly up and down your rear end until you clenched around nothing. "I have an idea," he whispered, kissing the top of your head. "Maybe it would be easier for you to use the credit card if you got a punishment of sorts when you did."

"A punishment?" you asked, looking up at him puzzled with your chin resting on his chest. 

"A fun one," he said with a nod, squeezing your butt. "I could spank you."

You tilted your head back and gaped up at him as he continued to work his palm along your flesh. You'd never done that before, which wasn't surprising, because you'd never been with an older man before. And that always seemed like the kind of thing a boy your own age would turn into a silly foray into a kink that you thought you might actually enjoy with the right person. "Spank me?"

Bradley's cock was a little hard now as his fingers worked down and down until he was teasing both of your holes. "Only if you want to. Might motivate you to use the credit card," he whispered with a smirk as your eyes fluttered closed. 

You moaned for him, long and needy, and when he took a few steps backward toward the edge of the bed, you followed him. When he sat down with his legs splayed, his cock looked gorgeous. Just shy of fully erect. Long, pink and pretty. 

"What if I don't like it?" you asked softly, taking a step closer to him. 

"Then I'll stop."

"And what if I do like it?" you asked, running your fingers along his thigh.

Bradley pulled your shirt up a few inches and kissed your belly. "Then Daddy will spank you when you use your princess card."

You moaned again and squeezed your thighs tight. "That sounds hot." And next thing you knew, he had you tossed across his lap with your butt up in the air. You could feel the tip of his cock rubbing along your belly as you scrambled to grab the bedding with one hand and his calf with the other. You looked up at him over your shoulder, and before you could say anything at all, he pushed your shirt up and rubbed his hand along your back, butt and thighs. And then he landed a solid slap that left your skin tingling, and you were already prepared to beg him for more. 

He spanked you again, right on the round of your butt, and you gasped, "Fuck. Bradley!"

He soothed your skin with his rough palm. "Do you want me to stop, Princess?"

"No!" you nearly shouted, wiggling yourself up in the air for more. And he delivered, spanking you three more times in rapid succession. "I love it," you gasped, wiggling a little more against his thigh. 

"I can see that," Bradley crooned. "That's because you're young and sweet, and you've never been bad like this before. You never had a Daddy who wanted you to use his credit card before."

His hand landed with another stinging smack, and you jerked against him, panting as you stared at the bedroom floor, waiting for more. Your thong was pulled taut, the fabric tight along your clit, and each movement brought pressure exactly where you wanted it. "Please?" you whined, and you listened to Bradley chuckle as you rubbed your pussy on his thigh.

"Wow. You really want this." He ran his fingers along the length of the strip of fabric between your cheeks, teasing your holes through the lace. You couldn't stop grinding on him. His coarse leg hairs and his muscular body kept you anchored as he spanked you so hard, you clenched. 

Then you were treated to another round of being soothed while Bradley told you to keep quiet. And the next time his hand met your right butt cheek, you jerked yourself against his thigh and whispered, "I'm gonna cum."

"Really?" Bradley asked. "Should I let you?" He was back to soothing you and running his fingers across your holes. 

"Daddy," you begged. "I'll order the bed tonight. I promise."

Bradley tucked his fingers inside your thong and teased you as he muttered, "This is going to work out even better than I thought." Then he used both hands on your hips to press you down harder on his lap, and you wiggled until you were moaning and clenching harder and harder. 

"Yes," you gasped, and as you reached the peak of your orgasm, he spanked you so many times in a row, your eyes filled with tears of satisfaction. "Daddy," you whimpered, looking up at his smile and his handsome face. 

"You're such a good girl for me," he praised, and slowly you managed to stand between his thighs on shaky legs. You kissed his lips softly as his big hands gently cupped your throbbing rear end. "I love you. Now order a new bed."

"I will," you promised, running your fingers along his erection. "After I take care of this." Bradley watched you with eyes wide, as you sank to your knees in front of him. You knew how much he loved your mouth on him like this, and you wanted to make him feel as good as he made you feel. His cock was throbbing in your hands as you kissed the angry, red tip and looked up at him. "After I take care of you."

-------------------------------

Your mouth on his cock was always a treat for Bradley, but you still had tears in your eyes which made you look even more beautiful to him as he reached for your paper crown and set it on your head. You kissed and nuzzled his cock with your face before pressing soft kisses along his balls. He wasn't going to last long after the spanking when you were as good as you were. But he was feeling smug; you got off rubbing on him while he spanked your perfect ass. 

He was planning on rewarding you by eating your pussy all night. He wasn't expecting to be the one who got head, but he'd never complain about this. Not when your perfect lips were wrapping around his cock like you were right at home. 

"You're so fucking good," he groaned, head tipping back as you took him deep. He took a few deep breaths as you got him really worked up. You were bobbing and moaning, and he watched you take him as his hands found your face. 

When you popped him free to take a deep breath, a pretty strand of your saliva dripped down onto the shirt you were wearing. "Feel good, Daddy?"

He huffed out a laugh. "Baby, you're the best." He stroked your cheek as you sucked on his tip and kept your pretty eyes on his. The crown was crooked on your head now, and he was just a mess for you. "Let me paint your lips up?" he asked, grinning as he thought about the lipgloss you liked to wear. Tonight he wanted you to wear him. 

You sucked him expertly until he was panting, and then you jerked him off onto your lips and face as you giggled. "You gonna help me get cleaned up?" you asked softly as Bradley looked at you completely mesmerized. He reached to swipe his long fingers through his cum, but then he paused as he remembered the polaroid camera sitting on the dresser.

"Don't move," he whispered, kissing your forehead as he stood. When he returned and got the camera ready, he kissed the top of your head and whispered your name. "Baby, if you think I wasn't wild about the photos you sent away with me, I can assure you that I was. Will you let me have more?"

"Yes," you whined, licking at your lips as Bradley took a picture of you before setting it aside. And he'd fight a hundred more Carls who tried to take such a pretty photo away from him in the future. 

"Let's clean you up, Princess," he murmured, kneeling in front of you and swiping his fingers through his mess. You licked his fingers clean over and over again, and Bradley pressed his lips to yours tasting himself. Then he put your crown back on the bedpost where it belonged, accidentally bumping your butt as he hung it up.

"Oww," you whined as he helped you to your feet. "I'm sore."

"I know," he whispered, collapsing onto the bed and coaxing you on top of him. He ran his palm gently along your ass as you curled up with your cheek on his chest. "God, you're perfect."

"I've never been spanked before," you whispered, and Bradley smiled against the top of your head. 

"I've never spanked anyone before."

You looked up at him immediately. "You haven't?" you asked in awe. "I thought you and Meredith..."

But he just shook his head. "Who would I have done that with? I've never had a girlfriend who called me her Daddy before. You make me want to do everything with you."

He watched you preen as you propped yourself up on his chest. "Everything?"

"Everything."

You kissed his pecs as he handed your phone to you. "Am I ordering a new bed right now?" you asked with a little giggle. 

"Yes," he grunted. "Put it on your princess card."

You held up your phone so he could see the bed and mattress you picked out. King sized. Four poster. But he liked it even better than the one he had now. He nodded and watched you purchase it. You tossed the phone aside and whispered, "Just wait. I'll earn myself another spanking in no time."

Bradley kissed you and said, "I know you will. Now let's talk about Big Bear Lake."

"Big Bear Lake?" you asked with a yawn as Bradley continued to soothe your rear end with his hands. 

"Yeah," he rasped. "When can you take a few days off of work so I can spoil you and Noah with a little trip to the mountains? Penny, Mav and Amelia want to go. We'd have some built-in babysitters."

"Mmm," you hummed, a smile on your lips as you snuggled against him again. "Let me talk to Dr. Kelly." Then Bradley let you fall asleep in his arms.

-------------------------

When you woke up on Saturday morning, your butt was still sore, but you were smiling against Bradley's chest. "Morning, Princess," he murmured in your ear. "How you feeling?" He rubbed his hand down your back and gently cupped you.

"So good," you groaned. Truly, you had enjoyed every minute of last night. Plus you were getting a new bed in this room. And Bradley had never spanked anyone else. And you'd slept so well. You straddled his waist, ready to show him just how good you were feeling. "Daddy."

But then you heard Noah jump out of his bed and open his door, and you knew he'd be in your bedroom in a matter of seconds. Bradley sighed as you scrambled under the covers with him, brushing his cock which was already getting hard for you. "I mean, I love my son, but..." he said with a laugh.

"Don't you dare!" you replied with a scandalized giggle. "He's an angel."

"Daddy? Princess?" Noah asked as he pushed the door open. "I'm hungry." He was so sweet, standing there rubbing his eyes as he looked at both of you. 

"Head on into the kitchen, Bub," Bradley told him. "We'll make you something yummy."

Once Noah was gone again, Bradley rolled out of bed, and you wanted to reach for him as he pulled some underwear on. Then he set his gray sweatpants down next to you and said, "Take your time."

You stretched and tried to sit up, but your butt hurt so much. So you just pulled on the sweatpants and stopped in the bathroom on your way to the kitchen. When you looked in the mirror, you were smiling nonstop. And when you went to see what the boys were up to, you smelled coffee brewing and saw your favorite creamer on the counter. Bradley was standing in front of the open refrigerator, shaking his head. 

"What do you want to eat?" he was asking Noah. 

"Pancakes!" he replied from his seat at the table.

He grunted. "How about something I know how to make," he grumbled. "Let's give Princess a morning off."

"I can make pancakes," you insisted, and he turned to look at you over his shoulder with a smile. You kissed Noah on the head and asked, "You want butter and syrup? Some strawberries, too?"

"Yes, Mommy," he replied, looking up at you with questioning eyes. Your heart stopped. It must have. You were having a hard time breathing normally as you looked down into his brown eyes and then up into Bradley's. "Mommy?" Noah asked, quieter this time, and you didn't know how to respond. 

"Noah." His name felt so precious on your lips as tears came to your eyes. You weren't sure if this is what Bradley wanted. But you wanted it. You could tell you were on the verge of crying as you stroked Noah's hair with your fingers. 

When one tear streaked down your cheek, you asked Bradley, "Is that okay?"

He was right there with his hands at your waist and his lips next to your ear. "It's okay with me, Mommy."

You kissed your boyfriend hard on the lips before swiping at your cheeks and reaching for Noah. "Come here," you said, picking him up even though he was getting heavy and nuzzling your face to his neck. You kissed him and said, "Let's go find the strawberries in the refrigerator." 

When you pulled out the carton of berries, you let Noah hold them. He looked delighted as you kept kissing his cheek over and over again while Bradley got your coffee ready for you. And he was all smiles just like his son as you held back your tears. You loved both of them so much, and you didn't want to put Noah down. So you just stood in the middle of the kitchen with him in your arms while Bradley took the strawberries and washed them for you. 

Then you whispered to the child in your arms, "I love you, sweet Noah."

"I love you, too," he said with a smile. "But I'm hungry." 

"Right," you said with a laugh. "I'll make your pancakes." 

Bradley had been hanging back for a minute, giving you a moment with Noah, but now his arms were wrapped around you both. He kissed your temple before saying, "Come help me with the strawberries so Mommy can cook breakfast."

Your ears were ringing with the word Mommy. They both kept saying it. You didn't think you would ever stop smiling. You took a sip from Bradley's Getting high is part of my job mug, and you swore you had never tasted anything so delicious in your life. You made pancakes, and they turned out beautifully. You even made some for Noah roughly in the shape of suns and stars, and he looked delighted when you set them down in front of him. Then you cut them into smaller bites and added syrup and some of the strawberries Bradley had managed to cut up. 

"Thanks, Mommy," Noah said as he shoved a forkful into his mouth. Bradley was reaching for a few pancakes from the stack as he smiled at you, but you took the fork from his hand and settled onto his lap even though it hurt your butt.

You cupped his face in your hands and kissed him softly. "Thank you, Daddy," you whispered, combing your fingers through his hair. "I love him."

"I know you do," he replied, pulling you closer. "He's wanted to call you his Mommy for a while. I'm just happy you're okay with it."

You laughed and watched Noah eating a strawberry covered in syrup. "I'm more than okay with it."

-----------------------------

For the rest of the day, you and Noah were inseparable. You colored together and did some puzzles, and Noah sat on your lap while he ate lunch. And your smile was infectious. Bradley thought about engagement rings and your birth control for most of the day even though he knew he shouldn't. But how was he supposed to help himself when you were playing tic-tac-toe and eating ants on logs with his son? How was he supposed to put it off any longer when he saw how happy you were?

He texted Mav a few times, making sure he could secure that lake house for a long weekend. And when you convinced Noah to take an afternoon nap, Bradley had you in his arms in the quiet house. He scooped you up as you giggled. 

"Think I should mark you down as Noah's Mommy at the daycare center?" he asked, dropping you onto the bed and climbing on top of you. He made quick work of the gray sweatpants and your thong.

You moaned and said, "Casey would be so pissed off," as Bradley pulled his underwear down and stroked himself a few times. 

"Imagine how annoyed she'll be when I get a ring on your finger," he growled.

You gasped as he pushed his cock inside you, and Bradley devoured your lips with his. You gaped up at him as he pushed your thighs wide and looped his arms around your legs. "Daddy," you whine softly, just spurring him on. He wanted to be gentle, because he knew you were still sore. But he felt feral inside. He wanted to mark you as his own. 

It didn't last long, and as soon as he filled your pussy up with his cum, Bradley pulled you against his side for an afternoon nap in the now silent house. He dozed with you and ran his hand along your back, enjoying the soft sound of your even breaths. He had promised Nat that he would make an appearance at the Hard Deck tonight after missing out on so many weeks. When everyone was awake, he would check to see if Amelia could come over and watch Noah for a few hours. 

But when you woke up and went right back to playing and snuggling with Noah who kept calling you Mommy, he shouldn't have been surprised at all that you didn't want to go out. As soon as he mentioned the bar, you looked up at him from the craft project taking place on the living room floor like he was very simple. 

"What would I want to go out tonight? Noah and I are busy. Besides, if I go and that Beau Simpson guy is there and touches me again, he's getting slapped."

Bradley knelt down and kissed you with a grin. "That's Mav's boss. You know that, right?" 

"I don't care who he is," you huffed, gluing construction paper together. 

"We'll stay in," Bradley whispered, but you were already shaking your head.

"Go out with Nat. I'll stay here with this sweet boy."

Bradley studied you as you looked at him. Your hand was rubbing Noah's back as he used some safety scissors to turn orange paper into a confetti mess that Bradley would be all too happy to clean up later. Because he could tell you were finally feeling like you belonged here without any stipulations or an expiration date. "You want me to go out for a bit?" he asked softly. "So you can have a night with Noah all to yourself?"

You nodded with a smile and said, "It'll be just like when you had the dating app. You'll go out for a few hours and rush back home pretending you're not completely smitten with me and just dying to have a flirtatious conversation on the couch."

Bradley groaned softly and kissed your lips. "I wasn't hiding it very well, was I?"

"No," you whispered. "But neither was I."

"I love you. I'll ask Nat to pick me up for a few hours so you and Noah can play together."

And the two of you were still playing in the living room when Nat arrived to pick him up. You'd turned the couch cushions into a little tunnel and a fort, and you were laying in it together watching Mickey Mouse on TV and eating popcorn. Bradley had to laugh, because he may as well have gone out for the entire afternoon since neither of you noticed him cleaning up the rest of the house as you laughed. 

"Hey, Natasha!" you said, offering her some popcorn.

Nat took a few kernels and asked, "You're not coming out with us?" as she ruffled Noah's hair. 

"No," you replied easily. "I'm going to stay in tonight with the little guy. You got the big one."

Nat groaned as Bradley grabbed his house key. "He used to be fun to go out with. Now he just talks about you all night and mopes when you're not there."

"Sorry?" But you were laughing and looking at Bradley.

"Don't be sorry. I love to see a grown man turn pathetic," Nat replied, winking at you. "Come on, Rooster."

Bradley knelt and then crawled across the floor to kiss Noah. "Love you," he said. Then he leaned closer to you and kissed your cheek. "Love you too, Princess."

When he grunted as he stood, you laughed and said, "Don't drink too much, old man." And then they were gone and you snuggled with Noah.

"Mommy, will you make me ants?" he asked softly when the popcorn was gone. 

"At this rate, you might turn into an ant," you told him, tickling his sides as he laughed hysterically. His chubby little cheeks were pink, and he looked so happy. He was a tiny, overjoyed version of Bradley, and you loved him so much.

"An ant! Mommy, you're funny," he giggled, and you scooped him up and took him into the kitchen. Once you peeled and sliced the carrots, you let him use a spoon to glob the peanut butter on them, and subsequently also on the kitchen counter. He sprinkled on some raisins and took a bite. 

By the time you got him into a bath, he had peanut butter everywhere, and your face hurt from smiling. You and he had a rubber duck battle until your clothing was wet. And you read eight books to him before bed, including the ones that you picked out at the bookshop with Bradley. Noah was yawning and trying to keep his eyes open as he sat on your lap, and if this is what being his Mom was like, you never wanted it to stop.

"Love you, sweet Noah," you whispered, smothering him in kisses once he was in bed. You quietly organized the books on his shelf and watched him drift to sleep. You turned on his night light and eventually slipped out of his bedroom. Then you leaned against the wall in the hallway, feeling a little bit overwhelmed by everything. 

Then you giggled. Bradley mentioned a ring earlier. Noah felt like he was yours. Bradley felt like he'd never let you go. All of the sweet gestures and the afternoon sex left you tingling. When you went to turn on his favorite song so you could take a shower, you saw a message from Natasha on your phone. 

Fair warning... he's pretty drunk. I'll return him home in one piece, but then he's your problem.

You took a quick shower, still smiling, and then slipped into a pair of your underwear and one of Bradley's oversized tropical print shirts that fell to your mid thigh. You did up most of the buttons and grabbed some Skittles from the kitchen. You were about halfway through a documentary about a serial killer when you heard someone pull into the driveway. 

Your heart beat a little faster as you peeked out the window and watched Bradley being led up the sidewalk by his best friend. "Easy," Natasha said as if she was talking to a confused animal. 

"Just wanna see her," he replied, way too loud as she tried to quiet him down. 

"She lives with you now, Rooster. You see her all the time."

Bradley just stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and started to chuckle. "She fucking lives with me, Nat. It's wild, right? Like she lives here now."

"Yes, she does," Nat grunted, trying to push him the rest of the way up to the porch. But he wasn't budging, and you were laughing now. You decided to give her a break and open the front door.

"Hi," you said softly, and then Bradley was coming for you so fast, Natasha almost lost her footing. You were in his arms before you could say anything else. He smelled like cheap beer, and his eyes were soft as he looked at you. "Did you have fun, Daddy?"

"Mmm," he hummed, pushing you backwards into the house. "Love it when you call me that."

You giggled as you felt his mustache on your neck, and you waved to his best friend as she headed back to her SUV. Bradley kicked the door closed behind him as you whispered, "I think you missed me."

He had one big hand at the back of your neck and the other was up underneath the shirt, skimming along your still sore rear end, making you press yourself against him. "You're so pretty, Baby."

You felt warm all over as he patted your butt gently with a little smirk on his face. You gasped and clung to him, your arms looped around his neck, and then his lips found yours. He tasted like beer, and as you parted your lips for him, he backed you up against the TV stand. It was just like the first night he kissed you, and he was still as gentle as he always was, if not a tiny bit more demanding. 

"I love you," he grunted. "And you're wearing my shirt. Looks great on you."

"Tell me about your night, Daddy," you coaxed, running your fingers through his hair. 

But he just started rambling as he unbuttoned the shirt with clumsy fingers. "Gonna take you to that lake house. Already talked to Penny about it tonight." Then he abandoned the buttons and cupped your chin in one big palm. His eyes were hazy and fighting for focus as he kissed your forehead. His voice was deep and filled with something a little dangerous as he asked, "When you gonna let me fuck a baby into you?"

He was stroking your jaw with his long fingers, eyebrow raised, waiting for an answer as the TV stand pressed into the backs of your thighs. He was more than twelve years older than you, and he'd been hinting at this for a while. It had always sounded appealing, but now that the three of you were on the same page about Noah calling you Mommy, you wanted it even more. "We should talk about this when you're sober," you told him, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. 

"You know I'm gonna feel the same way tomorrow," he whispered, a soft smile touching his lips now. "I'm getting old, Princess. I want another baby. With you."

He was such a good father, so patient and loving with Noah. The idea of him holding a tiny baby- your tiny baby- was almost too much. You let your head tip back as you moaned, "You're not old, Daddy. You're a classic. Let's go to bed."

After he carried you to the bedroom and set you down in bed, he pushed you back against the pillows with his delicious body weight. "You're not wrong. I've been drinking. You don't owe me a real response tonight. But next time we talk about it, I want an answer from you."

You nodded as he eased his body away from yours, and you watched him strip out of his clothing and head to the bathroom. You were going to have to figure out a way to put your feelings into words. 

---------------------------

Princess Mommy and her purple credit card. Fucking lucky bitch (affectionate). Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 35

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@chassy21

@yaboid19

@solacestyles

@avoirlecoupdefoudre

@daisyhollyxox

@throwinsauce

@awesomebooklover17

@wintercap89

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@bcon24

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@tetragonia

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@emptyloverofmine

@chaoticassidy

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@katiebby04

@marantha

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@fanboyswhore9

@xomrsalliej4787xo

@desert-fern

@sylviebell

@wkndwlff

[fishsticksloser]

Hi! Could I request Donnie x gn reader (or female, whatever is more comfortable with you)

Okay so- it was normal day in the lair and Donnie just ran into common room to rumble about his newest invention/project.

After a couple of minutes he noticed that noone was listening to him, everyone ignored his monologue. He went quiet but as soon as he did so, he Heard "will you continue or..?" It was ofc reader. They were so interested and amazed by his imagination that they couldn’t stop listening to him!

After awhile, when he was done with his speech, reader and April had to go, bc you know, school and stuff. BUT before they did, reader remembered something, they came up to Donnie and gave him some materials he said he needed the previous week "OH! I almost forgot! You were rumbling about missing parts to your projects, and how you didn’t have luck nor time to find and get them, so i just thought im gonna get them for you…here!” And donnie just stares at reader with this shining eyes and slight blush

Hope it’s okay <333

Crush

Donnie x gn!reader

Warnings: fluff, slight angst (purely Donnie's feelings nothing bad!), siblings suck, kinda short

A/N: Yes! Cute! Need!

Previous | Next

Donnie was used to being ignored. Truly he was. Still he would often talk about what he was working on to possibly find a solution to an issue, even if no one was listening.

So here he sat, in the living room with everyone else, yapping away about all the modifications he made on the Turtle Tank. Everyone else was doing something. Leo was reading a comic, Mikey was drawing, Splinter was watching tv, while Raph, April, and Casey all played a game. Donnie was tired of no one paying attention so he just stopped talking. No one moved.

"Are you gonna keep going?" He hears you ask. He turned to his right, seeing you sitting on the chair next to the couch. Donnie didn't even remember you coming in. He smiled slightly and continued his rambling, directing it at just you now. Of course he was making it sound so much cooler than it was... This is Donnie after all.

After a few hours of talking about his inventions, April tapped you and said it was time to go. Donnie was a little disappointed, he was finally excited to talk about an invention. He deflated a little, watching you leave. But suddenly you come running back in.

"Oh! Um... You mentioned last week that you were having trouble finding some parts and..." Donnie watched as you opened your back pack and handed him a few of the parts he'd been searching for. "I... I had some extra time and found them for you."

Donnie's cheeks heated up as he watched you run off. He was blushing? Impossible, Donnie doesn't blush. Still the fact that you went out of your way to find the parts he couldn't get his hands on made his heart race a bit.

"Ooooo! Donnie has a crush!" He heard Leo and Mikey laugh and nudge him as they walk by.

Crush? Donnie? Please, that's simply imaginary. Donnie doesn't do crushes.

"And someone's got a crush on Donnie." Raph chuckles, patting Donnie's back as he makes his way to his room.

A crush? You have a crush on Donnie? Why would anyone have a crush on Donnie? Now that's a tall tale, much like dragons but not Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster, or Pizzasaurus.

He shakes his head, not wanting to believe it. He stands up and walks to his room, trying to think of other possible solutions. Why would anyone like him? He's a freak. Not even his brothers like listening to his ramblings.

Then Donnie comes to the same conclusion as Mikey and Leo. He has a crush on you, but that doesn't explain your actions towards him... No. He still doesn't believe it.

He refuses.

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

He’s Back (Angst/Fluff)

BTTS!Turtles x reader

A/N: I’ve been toying with this small idea for some time, and decided that today was the day to write it down, finally adding Back To The Sewers to my list! Takes place around the time the turtles return from the future to their own time💚🐢

Warnings: Spelling💚

He had been gone for a year now. Your turtle boyfriend had been gone for a year. And every single day of that year, had been painful for you, as you had no idea where he had gone. Or any of his family members for that matter. It was as if all five of them had just vanished into thin air that day a year ago. And every single day throughout that year, you and your boyfriend’s friends looked for him and his family everyday. You, April and Casey had overturned every single stone in New York City in your search. But no matter where you looked, none of you could find them. It went too far that you and April stayed in New York, and looked the city through three more times, while Casey traveled to Japan to look for them there. He even got into contact with the Ancient one, and asked Usagi to look through the Battle Nexus. But nothing. The turtles were gone. And you had no idea where your boyfriend was.

You, April and Casey never gave up your search for the turtles and Master Splinter. But after having looked through every possible place the three of you could think of, all three of you opted to stay closely around the lair, making sure that it was ready for the day they might come back. You and April looked out for their stuff, and made sure it was clean, while Casey would do runs every now again, beating up and questioning any Purple Dragons he met on his way. But they knew nothing. No one knew anything. It was truly as if the turtles had just upped and left. And you were left confused and scared, fearing what had happened to the man you loved.

But it wasn’t long before you and your friends would get closure and answers to your many questions.

You had just gotten home from a late night shift, almost collapsing on your couch, still in your work uniform. You were so tired that you didn’t even turn on the light to your apartment. Instead you curled up on your couch, pulling out your phone, and opening your photo album. With a heavy heart, you scrolled through the pictures of you and your boyfriend. Your happy times together, kisses, hugs and all sorts of goofy pictures. Your heart ached, remembering each story behind every picture. His laugh and all the fun you had. Oh, how you missed him. What you wouldn’t do to get him back. To know that he was safe and to have him in your arms again. You missed him so much.

As you sat there, looking through all those happy pictures you had saved in your camera roll, you got a call from April. You looked at her name on your screen in confusion. It wasn’t typical for April to call you at this time of the night. So with a puzzled expression, you answered the call, asking April what was going on.

“Someone has entered the lair”, April said. “The alert Donnie installed on my phone just started blaring. Me and Casey are on our way down there”.

“I’m coming too”, you said, hurrying up from the couch, suddenly feeling very awake. “Don’t wait for me”, you said, as you started to put your shoes back on with one hand. “See what’s going on down there, and I’ll be right behind you”.

As you hurried out of the door, still putting on your jacket, your heart beating as fast as your running feet, carrying you down the street and directly towards the nearest subway station. During your train ride, you could not help but wonder what had entered the lair and triggered the alert. You hoped, with all of your soul, that it was something that could help you find your boyfriend, or at least let you know when you could see him again.

At your station, you ran from the train, out the station, headed directly towards Central Park. There, you made your way to the sewer that led directly down to the entrance of the lair. You lifted the manhole cover out of the way, before making your way down the metal ladder, closing off the hole behind you. Once at the bottom, your feet carried you through the tunnel, the sound of your feet echoing against the rounded walls, until you finally made it to the entrance of your boyfriend and his family's home. But then you heard something that made your heart halt momentarily, keeping you frozen in place. You heard Casey and April talking to someone. Calmly. Happily. And then you heard familiar voices. His voice…

You bolted into the lair, almost slipping on the floor when you entered the room. There you found April and Casey, talking with the turtles and Master Splinter, learning about where they had been for the past year. And there your eyes quickly landed on your boyfriend, resting on the couch between his brothers.

Your boyfriend stood the moment he saw you, everybody staying silent from the moment you bursted into the lair. For a moment the two of you just stood there, unable to believe your own eyes. But then, suddenly, both of you sprung into action, running to each other, throwing your arms around each other in a tight hug. A loud sup escaped you, the moment you felt him in your arms, burying your face against his strong shoulder, as he held you close, burying his beak against your hair, fighting to hold his own tears from falling.

He’s back. Your boyfriend is finally back in your arms, holding you as tightly as he did the night before he disappeared. He’s back, with many stories to tell after having missed you for a year, just like you had missed him.

[scream-by-coop]

Stu Macher - Rant #1

oh yeah spoiler warning - scream 1

this rant reveals who the ghost faces are so if you really want to watch the movie with a blank slate i suggest not reading this, but come back when you do to agree or debate me =]

ik no one asked for this, and I'm somewhat new to the fandom… but I've been seeing a lot of people saying stu was manipulated, he loved tatum, billy forced him into the situation and had no clue billy was gonna kill her. stu was not manipulated, you guys are all blind. he was a sociopath.

if you think stu didn't know billy was gonna kill tatum and that he felt bad… you have to think again. billy and stu had planned this out since they killed sidneys mom. they could have no ties back to the murders so obviously anyone in the group would have to go. this includes tatum and randy. i dont believe stu loved tatum, i think she was probably a coping mecanism from being dumped by casey. i dont think he was heartbroken by casey, i think he was offended. the reason i dont think stu cared for tatum is because after her death, while choking sidney he says "i've always had a thing for you" to her. even if he was joking, or trying to get on sidneys nerves, would he really get over the girl he 'loved' so easily after her death. stu and billy were not friends with tatum, randy or sidney. they needed a way to get to sidney. this is a very very common structure throughout all 6 of the movies. many people also headcannon stu as queer, even the actor who portrays him. and i believe this is very possible. you can see the way he looks at billy, and i dont think billy was using this to manipulate him. but this is just a headcannon so it shouldnt be taken very seriously. people also like to mention the "he killed my tatum" line. he was clearly trying to gain sidneys trust, he was a theater kid for sure. he knows how to act.

the idea of people victimizing stu is actually insane. you are telling me the man who murdered sidneys mother, claiming it was fun, making constant jokes and comments about it was not insane and was forced into that situation because of peer pressure. he is a psycopath. when sydney asks him for his motive and he says "peer pressure, im far to sensitive" he was JOKING / lying, he had not been peer pressured. this was his ALIBI as a COVER STORY. sideny even said "stu whats your motive, what are you gonna tell the cops" knowing he would lie. stu didnt seem to have a solid motive seemingly doing it just for fun, although it can be assumed due to his parents not being in the picture often that could create a great motive, billy had also said "total abandonment causes serious deviant behaviour." while pointing to stu. stu very clearly loved the attention he got from being a famous killer, just like in the movies he watched. he constantly made insensitive jokes about the people who got murdered.

in the third movie, it was suggested that billy just picked stu as a way out. someone to sell out if he got caught, people also claim billy was gonna kill him off after the fact but i just cant believe this, i personally think billy cared for stu. they were best friends, possibly lovers, and any of the ghost faces always killed off there partners before attempting to kill sidney to show they had no remorse. if billy really was gonna kill stu, he probably either wouldnt have gotten his help due to him being unstable and very very impulsive or he would have killed him infront of sidney. stu had added killing his ex girlfriend and her new boyfriend to the plan, would billy have allowed this if he didnt care for stu. i dont believe billy would do anything for stus gain, even if it solidified his loyalty to the plan.

thank you for taking the time to read my rant/debate. feel free to comment your argument points, i love debating so i find this real fun to see your opinions. this is just my personal opinion, even if i think its the right idea. you dont have to agree with me, i also have only recently joined the fandom and watched all the movies. stu is my favorite character, he is not a good person but i like his character design. i have watched the first movie twice now to try and see if there is anything i missed, so correct me if i got anything wrong =]

[kiddbegins]

You can take it - Matt Casey [18+]

Requested: yes

Word count: 3,072

Warnings:… smut [teasing, degrading, praise, overstimulation, choking, unprotected sex (wrap it), brief oral - f receiving, dirty talk, lots of begging..], cocky!matt 🫠

A/n: ohhhh my gooooood

Masterlist

Laying in bed with your boyfriend was the best part of your day. Always was. Especially when you just wanted to feel him around you in every way possible. Currently he had his arm under your neck, hand properly in your hair, just absentmindedly carding it through his fingers.

The opposite arm was resting on your hip, hand intertwined with yours as you let out a soft sigh. “You know what would look,” You started, pulling his hand just slightly up your side. Matt hummed faintly, glancing down at you regardless of the fact he couldn’t see your face. “Really good around my neck?”

For some reason just feeling Matt’s skin against yours had arousal bubbling in your abdomen, shifting just slightly to look up at him. His eyebrows were pulled together, eyes locked into yours. Gently you pulled at his fingers, the realization hitting on his face, “Oh-” In all honesty, he’d never even thought about choking.

Sure, he’d seen it done plenty of times in the porn he’d seen, but actually doing it? That was a different level. But as you nodded, dropping his hand and leaning over him to kiss him, he decided that he would do literally anything you wanted.

Not that that wasn’t already true. He’d find a way to walk on water if you had asked him to. But now, as your lips locked onto his, the roughness grew until he couldn’t stand being underneath you anymore.

Easily he flipped you onto your back, fingers trailing over your hips and up your sides. Matt slipped his hand under the loose shirt of his that you had on, “God you look so good in my clothes.” He muttered, leaving small marks from your jaw and down your neck that were certainly going to be there tomorrow.

That was his thing, he loved making sure everyone that worked with you knew that just because you were a bartender at a club didn’t mean you were free for them to grab at. You were taken and by a guy that would not hesitate to break someone’s face in for you.

“I think I look better without them,” You whispered in his ear, hearing the deep breath he sucked in. As smoothly as he could, he lifted the t-shirt, pulling it off and throwing it blindly to the side, face immediately going to your cleavage.

Now, you weren’t exactly cursed with a small chest and Matt would gladly live in the valley of your breasts if he could. One of his hands lifted, massaging one of them, his lips trailing underneath the other before they caught onto the nipple.

If he had the chance to get his mouth on you he took it and you adored every second of it. “Matt…” Your voice was breathy, back lifting into his touch as he softly sucked, a whine making its way through your lips.

Matt shifted himself between your legs, nudging them apart with his knee. Without much thinking you bucked your hips down, craving some sort of friction on your heat that only he could give you. And he did, moving his own down, the bulge under his sweatpants rubbing across you.

It wasn’t enough though, your hands snaking their way down, pulling him back against you with a press on his lower back. “You got yourself all worked up haven’t you?” Matt hummed, pulling away to get his own shirt off, a hand sliding over your shoulder.

He knew where you wanted him to touch you. And he could almost tell how badly but instead Matt pulled away, standing to kick his sweatpants off. You figured he’d come right back to you but instead, he grabbed your legs, pulling you to the edge of the bed.

A gasp slipped from your mouth as he leaned forward, kissing along your stomach before reaching your mouth again. “Now where did you want these?” He mumbled against your lips, ghosting his fingertips over every possible bit of open skin he could.

Down your sides, up your thighs, just barely touching your skin as he slid his palm up your stomach. Every ghost of a touch brought goosebumps to your body. “Matt please,” You pleaded, the only layers of clothing on either of you feeling like a tease all of its own.

“Please what princess? Touch you?” Matt’s eyebrow cocked up as he pulled your hips flush to the end of the mattress. “Cause I can touch you.” He just slowly pushed up, his barely covered length rubbing against the exact place you wanted, no, needed him.

You let out a whine, squirming slightly which did nothing but make him push you down by the waist. “Oh c’mon, you can take my teasing can’t you? You’re usually so good about it.” Matt dragged his palm down, gripping tightly at your upper thigh.

His thumb slid up the soaking piece of clothing you still had on, circling your clit just slightly before he pulled away. “Or are you feeling like a little slut tonight? I mean coming onto me about wanting my hand around your throat? Can’t get any worse than that.” Matt watched as your face twisted up, aching for anything more.

As soon as you tried to rock up against him he sighed, “I guess that answers that question, can barely use your words and you want me to believe you can take it tonight?” The cockiness that came out of him when he was horny was something nobody would ever believe.

This was Matt Casey, Lieutenant Matt Casey that was nothing but a leader and front man for his firefighters. But when he was with you? The nastiest words that came out of his mouth felt like they were getting spit right onto your cunt and he knew it.

God did he know how you got when he spoke to you the way he was. “I can.” You muttered, breath already heavy as you tried to control the way your body felt like it was burning. Matt tilted his head, lifting an eyebrow.

“What was that?” He leaned forward, knowing that him pressing against you was only working you up more but that’s exactly what he wanted. “You what?”

Thickly you swallowed, throbbing against him. “I can take it.” You reiterated, voice filled with desperation. “Please, Matt.” You bit at your lip, hands planted on the mattress next to you to keep from traveling down your own body.

Softly he hummed, fingers finally looping into the upper band of your underwear, just slightly pulling at them. “Oh you can?” Matt spoke, pulling the final layer off of you, hands instantly going right underneath the wetness.

You nodded instantly, his fingers inching closer to your entrance and it felt like if you had to wait any longer you’d explode. “Yes, yes I can, Matt just – fuck please.” Your pleading only did so much, the man obliging in the slightest as he let just his thumb land on the sweet spot you’d been dying for him to actually touch.

He barely moved it, painfully slowly encircling you. It was obvious from the look on your face that it wasn’t enough, that you wanted more and more but with Matt, the build up was what mattered the most.

“I could see how wet you are without even having to touch you, such a dirty girl,” He mumbled, leaning over you slightly, “Aren’t you?” His words were rhetorical, eyes moving down your body, soaking all of you in.

Matt sighed, slightly picking the pace up as he touched you, unsure how long he’d be able to hold off, his cock already aching and no doubt bright red as he worked you over. “Matt baby, please, I need you.”

Him touching you could only go so far, you wanted him deep and buried inside of you. “I’m not exactly done with you yet,” He was quick to respond, too busy enjoying the way you were practically squirming trying to get more friction.

That of course only made his other hand grip at your hip, tightly pushing it down, “Stay still or you won’t get anything that you want.” His threat pulled a whimper from you, fighting to stop your movements. “There you go, such a good slut for me, hm?” He hummed, rolling his thumb over you quicker as a slight reward.

Just as soon as he’d done that he fully pulled his hands away, instead shifting to kiss down your stomach, eyes up on your face as your breathing picked up. He knew how worked up you got with his mouth on you.

So it wasn’t that shocking that you felt his hot breath on your already aching skin followed by his tongue gliding through your slit. “Fuck–” Your breath caught, forcing your eyes shut to keep your body from lifting or even moving against the bed.

It wasn’t easy, each movement pushed you closer to breaking his one request. “Matt please,” You could barely focus on his movements, his tongue coming up to flick over your swollen and red bud. “I can’t–” A knot slowly built itself in your stomach, willing to be pushed over the edge.

But just like he knew what got to you, Matt always knew when you were close. So with one last kiss to your clit he stood again, the air now cold where his mouth had been. “I guess you’ve been good enough tonight,” He stated, slipping out of his boxers, finally letting himself free.

You couldn’t bite back the whine of desperation that grew as your eyes fell on his length. A smirk grew on his face as he stepped towards the end of the bed again. “Now, if I’m gonna give you what you want, you’re gonna give me what I want.” Matt trailed his fingers up you, cupping your cheek.

“Anything, just please fu–”

“Fuck you, I know baby, and I will, as long as you let everyone know who is fucking you.” He slid his hand from your face to the side of your neck, leaning down to kiss you. “Can you do that for me?” His voice was raspy, so filled with lust that you could have came untouched just hearing it in your ear.

Instantly you nodded, willing to agree to anything if it meant him in you. “Yes, yes, I can.” You didn’t have a chance to get anything else out, Matt slipping into you slowly, your head falling back.

A low groan built in Matt’s throat, having to still inside you to keep from busting right then and there. “God, you always feel so good around me.” He leaned his head down, just slightly rolling his hips forward.

“Matt–”

He shifted slightly, letting his hand splay on your chest, just inches from where you wanted it earlier, and where you still wanted it now. But of course he wasn’t going to give in that easily. And you could tell with each painstakingly slow thrust that he was going to take his time with this the same way as he did his teasing.

Your hands went up to his arm, squeezing, finding anyway to ground yourself to him that wasn’t in the way of pleasure forcing itself through your body. But his every touch made your skin burn, like it was all on fire.

You were a flame and he was the oxygen that kept it going. He didn’t seem to mind the way you let your other hand slide across your chest, just wanting to feel something more, anything. And your fingers trailing over your boobs did just that, a guttural moan escaping your mouth.

“Baby please go faster,” Your words were low but he heard them, just slightly building himself up, your legs hiking up around him. Each thrust felt like he was trying to get you over the edge but none did it, the feeling instead coercing through your veins.

His name was pulled out of you again, louder as his free hand lapped at your clit, slowly and in the opposite way his hips moved against yours. “You like that?” Matt looked down at you, twisting his fingers around you as he did. “When I touch you like this?” He cocked his eyebrow up.

“Y- yes, god so much.” Your words were mixed with moans as he sped up, unable to keep up the teasing thrusts, his own arousal building as he let out a heavy breath. “God, Matt, you’re–” You got cut off with a scream as he shifted, hitting that sweet spot right inside of you.

There was no way those living around you didn’t hear the way his name flew out of your mouth, hell, it’d be insane if they couldn’t hear the way your skin was slapping together. The slickness doing nothing but making it easier for him to slide in and out.

Just as you started to build up again, you looked up at Matt, grabbing his wrist. It wasn’t enough, you needed his hand. Matt wrapped it just enough around your throat, using the grasp to brace himself as he jutted forward harsher, your entire body shifting underneath him.

You gazed up at him, entire body overwhelmed as you grew closer and closer, “Tighter,” You moaned out, his name following as you felt his grip tighten just enough that you instantly clenched around him.

His name filled the room, moans mixing together with his as he worked you through it. “You just love when I have my hand around you, hm? Love being here for my own discretion?” Matt leaned forward, biting at your shoulder. “Being a dirty whore for me?”

You whimpered softly, nodding. How did you end up here? Casually saying that hey, your hand around my neck would be nice to him pumping into you so hard you knew you were going to be sore before the night was even over.

Not that you were complaining, every movement that he did made your heart race, one final squeeze of his hand officially sending you over the edge.

Every part of you shook, your heels digging into Matt’s lower back as you lifted slightly, being pushed back down as he continued into you.

There was no way he was one and doning you, no, he had plans now. And it was obvious from the way he didn’t stop, didn’t slow that he was sure he was going to get you through it more than once. More than twice. Maybe even more than three times.

And that just made your pussy ache more than it already was. You were already dripping and the whoreish sounds coming from both your body and mouth practically shoved Matt over the edge.

His voice was low as your name slipped like honey off of his lips, his face pressing to your skin as he fucked you through his own orgasm. His warmth filled you up and you didn’t even care that he hadn’t pulled out.

You didn’t care if this ended with you pregnant. All that mattered was how good everything felt. And god did it feel amazing. Matt’s thrusts only slightly slowed in an attempt to catch his breath, his hands still clamped onto you.

That’s the only reason you knew he wasn’t pulling out anytime soon. And that you were definitely in for at least a handful of more rounds.

“You feel so fucking good Matt Jesus—“ You groaned out loudly, face red as you reached up and put a hand on the back of his neck, pulling him into a kiss.

Your lips together always felt like someone set off fireworks and shoved you two together as they went off. Practically heaven on earth.

Plus when you were together at the same time? Matt was basically a fucking angel. Literally. He pulled back, pulling you up. “You still doing okay?” He whispered, making sure he wasn’t being too rough during all of this.

And he wasn’t. It was the perfect mixture of roughness that had you weak in the knees for him. And as you nodded he peppered an army of kisses over your face.

Gently he slid out of you, standing and holding out his hand to pull you to your feet. He was aware at how wobbly you were but in seconds you were pushed against the wall with his chest to your back, his arms wrapped around you tightly anyway.

His mouth left hot kisses over your shoulders, brushing your hair out of the way as he moved up to suck a mark onto your neck. “You’re so beautiful baby,” his words mumbled against your skin.

All you could do was hum, your body still sensitive as his hands caressed everywhere he could touch. “So, so beautiful.” Matt continued under his breath before pushing back into you.

A moan slid off his lips, reverberating on your skin as he trailed his hand back up your chest. “You have been doing…” a soft bite to the shoulder, “so good for me.” A firm thrust, his hand properly grabbing at your throat in time.

Your knees wobbled as you braced yourself to the wall, Matt’s thrusts almost bringing tears to your eyes. He relentlessly moved against you, holding onto you tightly, the exact way he knew you wanted.

Somehow the blonde was always, always so detail oriented. His fingers traced or touching exactly where they needed to, like he knew exactly what buttons to press to make you orgasm again and again.

Like how right now his grip was just tight enough that you were already building up a second time, the dopamine rushing through your veins. “Matt, Matt I’m already close I—“ Your word loud against the wall as his other hand snaked over your hips, holding you tautly to him.

“Go ahead princess,” He hummed, the breath on the back of your neck being the final nail as your knees buckled, vibrating against him as you fell into pieces under his touch.

Your eyes saw white as your orgasm crashed over you, forehead leaning onto the wall along with a string of profanities.

And he didn’t stop, face twisting up as he continued into you. “Matt-“

“You wanted this right? To cum oh so badly.” He hummed, the two of you ready for an incredibly long night that would have you aching for at least the next two days.

JOIN MATTS TAGLIST HERE!

tags: @winchesterszvonecek, @halsteadbrasil, @wnbweasley, @firetruckstuckley

[tmntforeverinmyheart]

I unironically love the mutant apocalypse, and really wish there was more content of it. I mean it paved the way for rises future that fans seem to worship. It’s unfortunate that the designs kinda sucked (looking at you leo) and how the bridge between the mutagen bomb and 50 years into the further is basically unknown. Like how did leo of all people become a cruel wasteland king? What tragic accident befell casey, april and karai for them to be nonexistent? What did raph and donnie do for 50 years? What happened to mikey to make him go crazy? So many questions left unanswered, so im gonna make content of my version of the mutant apocalypse for awhile cause i love them, it feeds my angsty soul lol

Leo retains bits and pieces of his past life. Unfortunately most of his memories have become disconnected from each other. He remembers a man or a mutant? Spikes of metal and skin, silver armour encasing his whole body, the man’s heart, pulsing with green. Green what? Leo didn’t know. He remembers colours, red, purple and orange. One radiating warmth and a fiery temper, one cold and calculating but with a softness, one filled with love and brightness. What do they mean? He thought back to the man (mutant?) how monstrous he looked. looking down at himself he could see the resemblance between the memory and his reality. The man felt most familiar, and unlike the colours was more in focus. He carried an air of superiority and held himself with pride. Leo wanted to be like him. A path has been chosen for him and he will follow it.

Note: Leo does not actually remember his name, I just wanted to make it obvious who the character was.

Tw blood

Donnie and Raph stayed together. Raph had to be his younger brothers protector, in this strange new world their ninja skills wouldn’t be enough, not in the state they were in. They wandered together, searching for their missing family members. Surviving on through the ever changing climate on scraps, raw meat, mutant flesh, it didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was staying alive and finding their brothers.

Mikey was separated from his brothers in the aftermath of the mutagen bomb, Eventually finding his way back to the sewer. His home was in disarray. Luckily he still had one friend he could count on. Ice cream kitty practically hug-attacked mikey when he opened the freezer. Mikey stayed in his home, finishing off the food in the fridge and cupboard. There wasn’t much to do really. He played cards with kitty. Failed to meditate, and looked at old photos. 10 years passed by and eventually the fridge and freezer stopped working and he had to go searching for another safe haven to keep his friend from melting. He found a still working pizza place and hunkered down. This pattern continued for a number of years. He traveled all over New York to different grocery, ice cream and pizza stores to keep kitty alive. Mikey became sickly from eating so much outdated and even moldy food. Mikey had to resort to eating his infinite ice cream friend. He grew hair at some point, which was odd (he didn’t even know that was possible), it was curly and unkept. He would braid his hair into different shapes to pass the time. The world around him was crumbling, seeming more and more out of a sci-fi movie everyday. He stayed in his head a lot, imagining a whole new reality where he still had his family. But he couldn’t completely discount his reality, after all he had ice cream kitty.

Until he didn’t…

During his travels, Leo met many mutants. One in particular just wouldn’t leave him alone. Their first encounter was a battle over a rotten carcass. She attacked, wrapping her long body around his lower leg, cutting off his circulation. He attacked her back, swiping at her with his claws. He remembered the man with the spikes, and manipulated the skin of his arm, forming two hard spikes, he swiped at her again. She backed off with a haunted look in her eyes. “Shredder” she said quietly, before slithering away.

[kellykidd]

No Matter What

*Gif belongs to its rightful owner, it is not mine*

Pairing: Matthew Casey x reader

Summary: From Anonymous: Hellooooo ‘Stay behind me no matter what.’ Matt Casey :) ~~ Matt Casey + Reader + Fire Call = Hookups in his Quarters (I don’t make the rules)

Words: 682

Warnings: Intimate moment, canon typical events

Read on Ao3 here

Notes: Sorry it’s so short, but I hope you like it Anon!

Join my taglist here

Tags: @mrspeacem1nusone @kiddbegins @pensfan5871

__

“Need any help with the inventory?” Sylvie asked.

“I think I’m finished up,” you laughed, "you bored or something Brett?"

"I know I've only been in Chicago for a few months, but this is the first shift I've had with no-"

"I'm gonna cut you off right there before you jinx us. Those who say the 'Q' word or even think about the lack of runs is a jinx to the whole house."

"How do you know this?"

"Candidiate a few years back-"

Battalion 25, Truck 81, Engine 51, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, building fire, 723 North Wabash

"Looks like you are the new jinx, Sylvie Brett," you laughed, hopping into the passenger seat of 61, "and the jinx gets to drive."

Sylvie started the short drive to the scene, "how's it going with you and Casey?"

"Good, yeah, we're in a good place. It's weird to date someone you work with though. I'd never done that before Matt."

"Helps that your crazy schedules are synced."

"True that," you giggled, pulling up to the fire.

You hopped out of the rig and grabbed the jump bag before heading over to Boden.

"Where do you need us, Chief?" you asked.

"Two still inside, owner needs to be checked out."

As you and Sylvie tended to your victim, you could hear the commotion between truck and squad.

'Chief, I need a medic inside if you have one to spare' your radio buzzed. 

"You good here?" You asked Sylvie.

"Yup, go."

You threw your bunker coat on and grabbed the jump bag.

"Medic coming in now, Casey. Where am I going?" you said, hustling towards the fire.

"I'll come get you, we're turned around in here."

You stopped and waited at the door. 

"Fire is pretty much out," he announced, "follow behind me."

You followed Casey into the building and up the stairs. 

"Baby, I need you to stay behind me no matter what," Matt admitted, "I don't know what hapened in here and I don't want anything to happen to you."

You nodded and followed him up the stairs to the second floor of the building.

"Victim is over here. Burns and possibly a neck injury as far as we can tell.”

“Thanks. Conscious?”

“In and out.”

You leaned down beside your victim.

“I’m a paramedic, I’m here to help you,” you introduced yourself as you undressed the victim of his jacket. 

“Matt, you’re right. I’m worried about a neck injury. Grab the collar.”

Your boyfriend, now assistant, handed you your supplies.

“Help me get him out of here. It’s getting hotter in here.”

He nodded, picking up the jump bag beside him and handing it to you. 

“Got him?” You asked.

He nodded and brought your victim outside.

After finding Sylvie, you loaded up the victim while Sylvie got the oxygen ready for the ride to the hospital.

——

Returning to the house after your run, you looked in the ambo’s mirror.

“Brett, did you seriously let me ride around with soot on my face?” You laughed, trying to rub it away.

You walked into the now full common room with your partner.

“So are we finally gonna convince you to take the firefighter’s test?” Herrmann asked.

“Haha, very funny Herrmann. 61’s my home, always will be.”

“I’m sure we’ll get you over here at some point,” he chuckled.

You ducked out of the common room and into the bunk room, where you peeked into Matt’s office. 

“Got a minute?” You asked.

“For you? Always.”

You locked the door behind you.

“You know,” you laid down, semi-seductively, on his bed, “they way you said ‘stay behind me no matter what’ on that last call was-“

He leapt up from his chair and drew the blinds. 

“Was what?” He smiled.

“I was kinda sexy,” you grinned.

“Oh yeah?” He leaned in for a kiss.

“Yeah.”

“You know what else is sexy?” He broke the kiss for a moment, “you with all that soot on your face.”

“I guess we should do something about these feelings then, huh Matt Casey?”

“I think you might be right.”

[thedemisapphic]

Wait I got a thought… and I haven’t done any research, I’m just curious. Would it be possible to accidentally make a portal to the prison dimension from the Hidden City? Like maybe from the Crying Titan since there’s so much Krang stuff lingering around.

Not a permanent one, but truly a mistake where it opens for a few seconds, sucks in what it can, and then shuts off. Which fills the Prison Dimension with a lot of junk.

And if this is possible, it made me think… what’s the likelihood of a separated AU where one of the turtles ends up in the Prison Dimension the whole time? And they don’t find their lost brother until the invasion, when everything crosses over? It would probably be after they’re all tots, because the baby turts wouldn’t survive. So like Splinter takes them sightseeing and one of the kiddos gets sucked into that random weak spot that formed a brief portal. And Splinter wanted to try to get them back, but he struggled to keep the rest of his kids on the ground during those few seconds as it was. So he really just has to bail and take it to heart, the guilt eating him alive.

I don’t really like thinking up stuff like this where Leo ends up getting thrown in because there’s SO MUCH of that stuff with him, it doesn’t appeal to me in the sense of coming up with my own ideas.

We see Raph Krang content a lot. I’ve made my own fair share of it. So he’s ruled out, simply because I’ve had my fill lol.

That leaves Donnie and Mikey.

And I think Mikey would end up being the one to survive.

Donnie is a softshell turtle, which means he truly can’t endure the violent nature of the Prison Dimension his whole life. It would kill him. Even if Krang took him in, they aren’t nice creatures.

Mikey would end up being the one to get sucked into the portal.

So imagine the day of the invasion, when the three Krang come through the portal, behind them comes Mikey. Unsure if he’s krangified or not!! But it’s hard to tell who he is at first. The only one who can identify him is Casey, who has seen him before.

I think I’ve decided I don’t want him krangified, at least not in the same way Raph was. But like… a little of both. He is FIRMLY connected to the hive mind. Rather than developing his Ninpo, he strengthened that. And Krang kind of just… infected him. So he has awareness, but can maybe summon tentacles like they can?? Gotta make the smaller creature useful somehow.

During that first fight, they realize that it’s Mikey. And Mikey doesn’t recognize them at ALL at first. They try but Mikey plows through them.

And I don’t know how we’d get here, but I can see Mikey eventually recognizing Leo. And he acts before he can think, TAKING RAPH’S PLACE to save Leo from Krang. And Raph, who was gonna do that, is just kinda watching, still hurrying over. Mikey faces IMMEDIATE reprimand and Raph skids past him, planting the escape pod on Leo’s chest before Leo can break out of his shock. And Leo then is left watching BOTH of them get stuck there. This it’s important- Mikey can’t be left alone without a Hamato with him at this point.

Somehow, while Raph and Mikey are together, Raph helps Mikey unlock his Ninpo. Something he NEVER GOT TO DO before. And if we’re going to save whoever gets sacrificed, uh, WE NEED HIS MYSTIC HANDS. Because if Casey is here at all, it means they saved Mikey in his timeline and he was able to develop his ninpo. So Casey is aware of how powerful Mikey CAN be, even if today he’s at square one. So Casey is still able to plant that seed amongst his family.

Or, who’s to say Donnie can’t make a portal? Because Mikey, I think he has the most mystic potential. Isn’t limited to ONE THING. He can do a lot with what he has. Maybe Donnie could do it? Like him and Mikey actively working together?

I don’t know, but I like this idea :3

[maximoffcarter]

loml.

Pairings: Casey Novak x reader, Casey Novak x Alex Cabot.

Summary: Alternative ending...after finding out that Alex was still alive and after having the chance to talk to her, something changed in her once again, unsure of why life had taken Alex from her and when she found happiness again, decided to bring her back. Once again, things don't always go as we want them to...

A/n: ✨SURPRISE✨ So, I did not expect a lot of you to actually be upset that Calex wasn’t endgame, I thought people would like that Casey ended up with reader🥴 So, sweet and genius anon sent me another request and here you have. So please let's all say "thank you sweet and genius anon", thanks to them, we have an alternative ending😌 I hope I don't disappoint with this one haha. More to come guys, I'm working on everyone's requests. Hope you guys enjoy this, leave comments, hearts, whatever you like and reblog so this gets some love🫶🏻

Part 1.

*not my gif*

It had been a few months since Casey and Alex had seen each other again. Casey couldn’t deny that after being upset and hurt that Alex had lied and had just left Casey to think that she was really gone, part of her was happy to know that she was still alive. She had tried to go back to her life and act as normally as possible, but her mind couldn’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if she hadn’t moved on. If she had closed herself to the possibility of being alone for the rest of her life, then Alex walking back into her life. But then her mind was clouded with guilt. There was no denial that she was happy, everyone noticed it, everyone commented on it, she had seen the change in her life, and she couldn’t deny the strong feelings she had for y/n. She was thankful that even in the darkest time of her life, y/n had been able to light it up at some point. And her mind and mind being split in two made her feel guilty and upset at herself.

As for y/n, she noticed the way Casey had turned quiet. She could sense the change in her attitude and the way she acted around the squad and y/n. Yes, she was still pretty much clinging to her, she was still pretty much being her silly self around y/n, but she could also tell that there was something bothering Casey, and she couldn’t help but think about Alex. After Olivia told her who Alex had been for Casey, she couldn’t help but feel guilty for persuading Casey, and also hurt to think that what they had was something special, something that no one could replace. Their time together had been everything, y/n hadn’t been this happy in forever, and Casey had confessed the same thing, but y/n still couldn’t take off her mind that maybe, just maybe, there was still a part of Casey that deeply loved Alex, after all, y/n could tell that Alex had been her first true love…

“Earth to y/n.”

Y/n snapped out of her trance and looked up at Olivia, offering a small smile as she saw the coffee in her hand. “Thanks.” She said softly as she grabbed the coffee and took a sip of it.

Olivia sat on the desk and looked directly at y/n, sensing that there was something wrong. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

“Nothing.” Y/n simply said as she focused back on her computer, taking another sip of her coffee.

Olivia sighed softly. “You know better than to lie to me, y/l/n. So, are you gonna tell me or will I have to get it out of you?”

Y/n sighed as she looked back at Olivia, putting her coffee down. “Why do you think Casey actually accepted to go out with me?”

Olivia was taken aback by the question, but soon enough understood what this was about. “Well…she was really into you. It had been a while since I had seen Casey acting like that for someone. So, I’m sure she accepted because she wanted you.”

“Or she was just trying to get over Alex.” Y/n snapped all of a sudden, feeling a pang of sadness.

“Is this about Alex coming back?” Olivia asked softly.

“I know she was your friend. That she was loved by everyone here but…” y/n shook her head as she looked at her coffee. “…why did she have to come back?” She whispered softly.

Olivia looked away for a moment before she looked back at y/n, placing her hand on her shoulder and squeezing it. “We needed her. It was a surprise to all of us that she was still alive.”

“Casey was so upset, and then she just…accepted it, I guess. And now she’s…” y/n’s voice broke slightly. “…she changed.”

“I know it’s hard to think that Alex was someone important in Casey’s life. And like I said, it was really hard for Casey, she had some awful days. But you made it all better, y/n.”

“And what guarantees me that she won’t regret being with me and she’ll try to find Alex?” Y/n snapped again, her eyes getting teary as she looked up at Olivia. “I feel…bad. I feel guilty to think that I persuaded Casey when Alex was still alive. And the thing is…that I can’t even hate Alex because she’s so nice.”

Olivia huffed a little, nodding her head. “She mentioned how nice it had been to talk to you when you took her to the hotel.”

Y/n nodded. “I knew about her already, and even if I wanted to be upset, I couldn’t. She was so nice and so sweet.” She sighed.

Olivia placed her hand on y/n’s cheek, making her keep staring at her. “Casey loves you, y/n. I can tell. Casey wouldn’t just pretend. It’s not her.”

Y/n nodded softly. “I want to believe you, Liv. But it’s…hard when I see that she’s not acting like herself.”

Olivia nodded, but before she could say anything else, Elliot walked to them letting them know that they had a case. Y/n wiped away the tears that had left her eyes, taking another sip of her coffee before she followed Elliot. Olivia noted that she’d have to keep an eye on y/n, hoping that things wouldn’t get hard from here.

********************

Y/n closed the door behind her and leaned her head against it for a moment. She took a deep breath before she dropped her bag on the floor and walked to the kitchen. She slowly walked to the kitchen as she rubbed her temple but stopped in her tracks as she found Casey sitting on the kitchen island on one of the stools. Casey turned to look at her and offered a smile, y/n returned a small smile and walked directly to the cabinets to grab a glass. Casey frowned as she saw each move y/n made. She took a deep breath and tilted her head slightly.

“Y/n?” Casey whispered softly.

“Yeah?” Y/n whispered back as she got the glass full of water, drinking all of it in one sip.

Casey sighed softly as she stood up and walked around the kitchen island to get to y/n. She wrapped her arms around her waist, pulling her close to her and kissing her shoulder. “Are we okay?” She whispered softly, there was a slight hint of sadness in her voice.

Y/n sighed softly and closed her eyes as she felt Casey kissing her shoulder. She placed her free hand on Casey’s arm and leaned back against her. “We are, Case.”

Casey sighed softly as she buried her face on y/n hair, closing her eyes as she breathed in her scent. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry about what?” Y/n whispered softly.

“About Alex.” Casey said softly, the name feeling weird as it left her lips but so familiar at the same time. “I really didn’t think this would affect me.”

Y/n sighed softly, leaving the glass on the counter, and turning in Casey’s arms. She rested her forehead against hers and placed her hands on Casey’s cheeks. “I get it, Casey. Alex was someone important to you. Maybe…everything to you.” She whispered the last words with a hint of sadness and jealousy. “I can’t blame you.”

“But it’s not fair to you.” Casey whispered back, pulling away enough to stare into her eyes.

Y/n nodded as she offered a small smile. “It’s not like you’re running back to her. You’re still here.”

Casey offered a small smile. “And I’m not going anywhere.”

Y/n smiled. “You better not. Or I’ll sue your ass.”

Casey couldn’t help but chuckle softly. “Oh, really? And who would represent you, huh?” She grinned softly as she pulled y/n closer.

Y/n shrugged as she grinned back. “I’ll probably get Donna or Sophie to represent me.”

“Now that’s rude.” Casey couldn’t help but chuckle softly before she leaned in and pressed a sweet and tender kiss on her lips. “You know I love you, right?” She whispered against her lips.

Y/n nodded softly as she pecked her lips repeatedly. “I love you too.”

Casey smiled and kissed her nose softly. “How about we go out for dinner? My treat.”

“Sounds good to me.” Y/n smiled softly as she kissed her lips one more time before she grabbed Casey’s hand in hers. “Let’s go because I’m starving.” She chuckled softly.

********************

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Casey snapped as she crossed her arms, staring at Elizabeth. “Is this some sick joke or something?”

Elizabeth sighed as she sat back in her chair, shrugging. “It’s Moredock we’re talking about, Casey.”

“Not like I haven’t gone against him before. Why is it so important now?”

“We’re against a goddamn white suprematist. We know how Moredock pushes and tries to get what he wants. He might be able to actually win this if we don’t get ahead of him.” Elizabeth tried to keep her voice as low as possible, already sensing that Casey was about to start yelling any time soon.

Casey scoffed. “And what? I’m not capable of doing this in my own?”

Elizabeth sighed as she looked at Casey. “Casey…I know this is ideal for you. That this…” she shrugged. “…this is still a hard topic for us. But we need Alex.”

“No. You need Alex. I don’t. I’m capable of continuing this trial without her.”

“I’m not doing this to get on your ass, Casey. Both of you can actually win this case. She’ll be your second chair. That’s all.” Elizabeth leaned back in her chair as she sighed. “Have you had some…trouble with y/n?”

Casey sighed as she sat on one of the chairs, nibbling on her lip for a moment. “We are okay…but I did have my moments.”

“You cannot help it.”

“That’s what she said too.” Casey sighed as she ran her fingers through her hair. “I…I love her, Liz. There is no denial in that.”

“Oh, I know that. But you also loved Alex. And it’s not like you guys ended things. She died.”

“She left.” Casey snapped. “I know it was for her own safety. But she didn’t die. She left.”

“I thought you had forgiven her.”

“I did. Which is why this is hard, and I cannot just…work with Alex as if nothing happened.”

“You and y/n are professionals, Casey. Act like one.” Elizabeth put her glasses on and returned her focus to her paperwork. She then sighed and looked back at Casey. “I’m sorry. I truly am. But this is to get justice.”

Casey nodded. “I know.”

Casey didn’t say anything else, she simply got up and left her office. Her mind was spinning as she tried to think what she was going to tell y/n. She felt bad enough about this whole situation, she had spent the last weeks trying to show y/n that it was her she loved, that it was her she wanted, and the things she did, and her feelings were genuine. But she knew y/n was still insecure, and honestly Casey couldn’t blame her. As she walked to her office, her heart dropped at the sight of a blonde-haired woman standing by her desk.

“Alex.” Casey simply said.

Alex turned to look at Casey and smiled softly. “Guess Liz broke the news to you.”

Casey exhaled as she nodded, walking to her desk, and trying to avoid eye contact with Alex. “She did. I was just going to pick up my stuff and head to the squad room.”

Alex nodded. “Can I come with you?”

Casey wetted her lips anxiously, turning to look at Alex for a moment, feeling like her heart was going to burst out of her chest. “Maybe you should stay this one out. I need to…” she looked down at her briefcase trying to come up with an excuse.

“Talk to y/n?”

Casey looked back at Alex, the mention of her girlfriend making her feel guilty all over again. “Yes.”

“I’m sorry that I’m making you go through this.”

“It’s not…” Casey sighed as she shook her head. “Alex, it’s complicated. It’s not like I hate you or don’t want to ever see you again. I told you that you’d always have a special place in my heart. And I meant it. But…it’s hard.”

Alex nodded as she shrugged. “I don’t want to come between you and y/n.”

“I know.” Casey said softly. “I don’t want that either.”

Alex sighed. “I’ll check the files with Liz. And you can find me there once you’re back.”

Casey nodded. “Sounds good.” She said before she left her office, sighing loudly as she walked to the elevator.

Casey felt like she was between two walls, she felt even more confused and upset about this whole thing, more so with herself, how she was debating about this whole thing when she was sure that she loved y/n. But seeing Alex again…fuck. As she arrived at the squad room, her eyes landed on y/n rapidly, and she felt her heart dropping at the serious look on her face. Y/n walked to her and tried to offer a small smile before she grabbed her hand and pulled her into an empty office.

“You heard, didn’t you?” Casey asked softly.

Y/n sighed as she closed the door, turning to look at Casey. “Cragen cracked the news just now.”

Casey sighed as she ran her fingers through her hair. “Yeah, I just had a meeting with Liz.”

Y/n tilted her head as she pulled Casey close to her. “Are you okay?”

Casey nodded softly as she smiled. “I am, I just…” she sighed. “I don’t want things to be weird between us.”

Y/n sighed softly as she placed her hand on Casey’s cheek. “My love…we talked about this. I trust you and I know what Alex was for you.”

Casey nodded again. “I know but still.”

Y/n nibbled on her lip for a slight moment as she stared at Casey. “Do you think maybe…we should take a small break?”

Casey’s heart dropped as she stared at y/n. “What?”

“I don’t mean this in a bad way. I just mean this…for you to clear your mind, and don’t feel pressured because of me.” Y/n said softly.

“No, I…” Casey shook her head. “Y/n…”

“We are okay, Casey.” Y/n smiled softly as she stroked her cheek. “I still love you, and I always will. But I know you’re debating with yourself in that pretty head of yours.”

Casey sighed as she looked down at the floor. “I’m sorry, this is just…hard.”

“I know.” Y/n smiled softly. “I gotta stay today going through the case. I’ll text you anyway, okay? And if you need anything, you know where to find me.”

Casey felt her eyes getting teary but nodded softly. She placed her hands on y/n’s waist and pulled her close to her, kissing her lips softly. “I love you…I really do.” She whispered softly against her lips.

“I know.” Y/n smiled as she kissed her lips again.

********************

“Hi, have you seen Liv?”

Y/n looked up and her heart stopped for a moment as she stared at Alex. “Oh, uh…she went for lunch, it was her turn to go.”

“Oh, got it.” Alex cleared her throat. “I’ll uh…come back later then.”

Y/n nodded softly. “Alright.” She said almost in a whisper.

Alex sighed softly as she turned to look at y/n. “I’m sorry.”

Y/n looked back up at Alex as she furrowed her brows. “Sorry for what?”

“Because I know that I messed things up with you and Casey. And I didn’t mean to. I really didn’t. I didn’t expect this to happen. I don’t really know what I expected but I am really sorry.” Alex said rapidly, almost running out of breath as she spoke.

Y/n sighed softly as she shook her head. “Alex…I…know. And I know you didn’t do this on purpose. None of this was planned or anything, and I don’t hate you or anything.” She licked her lips anxiously, sighing again. “I’m just…I do wish things could’ve stayed the way they were. And I’m also…sorry.”

Alex shook her head. “She had a right to move on.”

“I know. But still.” Y/n offered a small smile. “Everything is okay, Alex. I promise.”

Alex nodded as she offered a small. “Good. I don’t want us to be in bad terms or anything.”

“We’re good. And…happy to have you back. I know you and Casey will do amazing.”

Alex smiled. “Thank you.”

Y/n watched Alex go and she took a deep breath before she exhaled, feeling her body relax not even noticing that she had been holding her breath and that she was tense. She shook her head softly as she went back to her computer and tried to focus back on what she was doing, but she still couldn’t get out of her head everything that was happening. What if the universe really didn’t want them together and Alex kept coming back because they were supposed to be together? The way Olivia had talked about Casey and Alex the first time…it sounded like they were meant to be and there had been an inconvenience that had stopped them for a moment, and then there she entered…was she an inconvenience too?

********************

Casey nibbled on her lip as she stood outside the courtroom, she had already talked to Elliot, Alex and even Moredock had joined the conversation. But there was no sign of y/n, and for a moment she feared that she wouldn’t show up anymore, or maybe she had been distracted with Olivia with something about the case, or…maybe she just didn’t want to see her. Casey sighed softly as she leaned back against the wall, looking at her watch over and over again. And then just as she turned to look at the elevator, her heart started beating hard as she noticed y/n walking to her. Casey smiled softly as she walked to y/n, meeting her halfway.

“You came.” Casey said softly.

Y/n nodded as she smiled. “I told you I’d come.” She placed her hand on Casey’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

Casey nodded. “Yes. I mean…it’s stupid if we lose to be honest.”

“I really believe you could’ve won this on your own.” Y/n grinned softly.

Casey chuckled softly as she nodded. “Thank you.” She wetted her lips anxiously as she stared into y/n’s eyes. “Y/n…can I…” she sighed. “Can I please-“

“Case, we’re starting.” Elliot called out for Casey as he walked inside with Alex.

Casey turned to look at them before she groaned softly and turned back to y/n. “Well, I guess-“

Y/n placed her hand on Casey’s cheek and leaned in to kiss her lips softly. She took a moment, not caring that they had to go inside already. She then smiled softly against her lips, pulling away enough to look into green eyes. “You got this, Case.”

Casey smiled softly, leaning into y/n’s hand for a moment. “Thank you.” She whispered softly before they walked inside the courtroom.

The squad could feel the tension in the whole courtroom, it wasn’t unusual for this to happen, but this case specially had taken a toll on everyone. Y/n’s eyes were fixated on Casey the whole time, something in her mind telling her that something was wrong. She suddenly started feeling anxious, her leg bouncing and her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her blazer. She kept staring at the defendant’s side and back to Casey and Alex, something didn’t sit right but she couldn’t quiet tell what. Elliot noticed this as he sat beside her, furrowing his brows as he looked over to where y/n kept looking at and then looking back at her. At first, he didn’t say anything, focusing on the trial and what they were saying, but he couldn’t help but worry about the way y/n’s demeanor had suddenly changed. He carefully and slowly placed his hand on her bouncing leg, getting her attention and helping her snap out of her trance.

Elliot leaned in so he could whisper in her ear. “Everything alright?”

Y/n sighed softly as she leaned in too. “I don’t know. I feel like something is not right.”

Elliot furrowed his brows. “About what?”

Y/n looked back at the defendant’s side, and then back at Elliot. “Maybe it’s just me but…I don’t know.”

Elliot nodded. “We’ll keep an eye, okay? Don’t worry.” He grabbed her hand in his and squeezed it, offering a small smile.

Y/n returned the small smile and looked back at Casey, sighing softly. She tried to focus back on what they were saying, happy that the judge had taken Casey and Alex’s side but also trying to keep her eye on everyone around. The time seemed to slow down at some point, feeling the whole tension around, making her anxiety increase even if she was trying to hide it. She kept looking around with Elliot, making sure to also let Munch and Fin know that they were keeping an eye on everyone. But then, what had felt like time had slowed down, suddenly changed when she caught Kyle standing up, and before she knew, he pulled a gun out of his pocket.

“Race traitor!” Kyle screamed, and suddenly the whole courtroom was filled with screams and shots.

Y/n stood up rapidly, getting her gun out and trying to get to Casey as soon as possible, but Kyle had gotten there first, holding the gun against Casey’s head. Y/n felt like once again, time had stopped, and everything was in slow motion as she screamed for Casey. She pointed the gun at Kyle and heard Munch telling him to drop it but then another shot went off, making y/n turn to see they had hit Munch. Next thing she knew, Kyle pushed Casey to the floor and fired another shot directed at Elliot, and then he saw the way he turned directly to Alex who was about to walk to Casey. Without even thinking, y/n moved Alex out of the way and dropped to the floor as she got hit, groaned at the burning pain coursing through her body.

“Y/n!” Casey yelled as she crawled to y/n. “No, no, no. Y/n. Baby.” She cradled her head in her lap, and tried to find where she had been shot, gasping as she noticed it had been near her heart. “No, no. Baby, you need to stay with me.” Her hand went to y/n’s cheek, trying to get her to look up at Casey. “Alex, I need help!” She screamed desperately as she felt tears rolling down her cheeks.

Alex got on y/n’s side rapidly and pressed on the wound, earning a guttural scream from y/n. “I know, I’m sorry! I need to stop the bleeding.” She looked at Casey and tried to look back to find anyone who could help, when she figured out, they were down, she started yelling. “Someone call 911!”

Casey looked back down at y/n, feeling a knot in her throat and her chest heaving. “Y/n, please stay with me. Please. I need you to stay with me. Help is coming.”

Y/n coughed, blinking rapidly as she tried to keep her eyes on Casey. “C-Case…”

“I’m here, baby. I’m right here.” Casey’s voice broke as she stared down at y/n, stroking her cheek softly. “Keep your eyes open for me.”

“I can’t…” y/n whispered softly. “Hurts.”

“I know it hurts. But you need to stay with me.”

Y/n did everything in her power to smile, her eyes locked on green ones. “I-I love you, Casey…s-so much.”

Casey’s eyes widened as she shook her head. “No. Don’t do that. Don’t you fucking dare do that.”

“M’sorry.” Y/n felt tears rolling down her eyes, trying her best to not close her eyes. “You…you are the l-love of my life.” She smiled softly. “And don’t…don’t say I am too.” She huffed a weak chuckle. “I’m okay with…knowing that I…that you l-loved me.”

Casey nodded. “I love you…so much.” Her voice broke as she spoke, sobbing quietly as she kept stroking her cheek.

Y/n nodded, turning her head to look at Alex. “S-Stop.” She placed her hand on top of Alex’s.

Alex shook her head, trying to keep y/n’s hand away. “What? No! Help is coming! Y/n don’t give up! Stay awake for Casey!”

Y/n smiled weakly, trying not to choke as she started coughing blood. “Alex…t-take care of Casey. P-Please.” She said softly.

Alex looked at Casey for a moment, blue eyes meeting green ones, before she returned her stare to y/n. “Y/n, don’t say that. Don’t-“

“Promise me.” Y/n pleaded as tears rolled down her cheeks.

Alex took a shaky breath before she nodded. “I promise.” She whispered softly, offering a small smile.

“Good…” Y/n smiled weakly before she turned to look at Casey again, finally letting her eyes closed.

Casey shook her head, sobbing loudly. “No! Y/n wake up! Please! Someone help!”

Alex felt tears rolling down her eyes as she stared at y/n. At Casey’s screams, she moved beside Casey and wrapped her arms around her. “Casey…she’s gone.”

Casey sobbed uncontrollably as she held onto y/n but leaned over Alex. She was living in a nightmare…again.

********************

Alex knocked on Casey’s door softly, offering a small smile as she leaned over the doorframe. “Hey.”

Casey looked up at Alex and smiled sadly. “Hi.” She whispered softly, looking back down at her hands. “How did you know I was here?”

“Olivia and Elliot went over your place and didn’t find you there.” Alex shrugged. “You always stayed longer in your office if you needed to. Or I’d find you at the cages.” She grinned a little.

Casey huffed a weak chuckle. “Not really in the mood to go to the cages, but eventually.” She said softly, nibbling on her lip as she tried to hold back her tears. “Y/n always said how she wanted to die as a hero.” She shook her head. “I always told her she was an idiot for saying that. And…she did die as a hero.”

Alex nodded as she sighed, walking inside Casey’s office, and leaning over her desk, looking down at her. “I should’ve paid more attention.”

Casey shook her head. “She would’ve done it for anyone. Don’t blame yourself for that.” She looked up at Alex, offering a small smile. “You tried to help.”

Alex nodded. “You know that…I will…keep my promise, right?”

Casey only stared at Alex, not sure what to say or do. She then looked down at her hands again, fidgeting with her fingers. “I know.”

“I’m gonna be a pain in the ass.” Alex said a little playfully, trying to lighten up the mood even if she knew Casey was heartbroken.

Casey couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on her face. “You were always a pain in the ass.” She looked back at Alex and stared at her for a moment again. “You won’t…leave?”

Alex shook her head. “Liz offered me a spot here. My…old spot.” She smiled. “Well…you’re the main ADA, but…I’m gonna be helping you.”

Casey felt her heart stopping for a moment but couldn’t help the smile on her face. “Good.”

Alex nodded and then stood up, offering her hand. “C’mon.”

Casey furrowed her brows. “What?”

“I’m 100% sure that you haven’t eaten anything.” Alex raised her brow. “So, c’mon.”

Casey sighed softly as she grabbed Alex’s hand. “Your treat?”

“Of course. Anything you want.” Alex smiled softly, squeezing her hand before she dropped it.

“It’s gonna be a big bill then.” Casey grabbed her stuff and followed Alex. She turned to look at her office for a moment and sighed softly before she closed the door.

********************

“C’mon, we’re gonna be late!” Alex yelled as she grabbed her stuff, cursing under her breath as she noticed she now had her hands full of bags and she still needed to put on her coat.

“Alex, it’s 7:15 am. We have time to get there.” Casey chuckled softly as she looked at Alex and grabbed some of the bags she had in hand. “Go get your coat on, nerd.”

Alex furrowed her brows. “How am I a nerd for wanting to leave early?” She scoffed.

Casey shrugged. “Still a nerd.” She grinned as she leaned in and kissed her lips softly. “What is she doing anyway?”

Alex shook her head as she sighed, walking to the stairs as she grabbed her coat. “Harper Grace Cabot! You better get down here or no ice cream after school!”

Casey chuckled as she stood beside Alex, leaning in and kissing her cheek softly. “You know that’s not true, you’ll take her anyway.”

“She’s my little princess, how can I not?” Alex grinned softly, turning her head to the stairs as she heard footsteps.

“Comin’! Comin’!” Harper suddenly jumped and skipped the last two steps, standing right in front of Alex and Casey, smiling softly at them. “Mama, d’you like what mommy did to my hair? I look like a real princess!” She said as she turned to show Alex, showing her soft redhead curls falling perfectly on her shoulders.

Alex chuckled softly as she leaned down to kiss her forehead. “You always look like a princess, babygirl. But specially today! You look beautiful. Mommy did a good job.”

Harper giggled as she nodded, grabbing her coat and then her backpack. “Mommy, I know you say not to go to the closet, but I was lookin’ for my blue dress and I…found this.” She got a picture out of her pocket and handed it to Casey.

Casey took it and her heart dropped as she noticed it was a picture of y/n with Casey, one of the first times they went to the bar with the squad, Olivia had taken the picture. She turned to look at Alex, unsure if it was right or not to talk about y/n. After y/n’s death, Casey felt once again that she had lost herself, but this time, she let everyone around her help her, not letting her sadness take over her like last time. Unsure at first, she let Alex back in her life, the started having a routine again of going out for lunch, spending time in each others' offices just going through their files, and every now and then going for a drink. It wasn’t Alex’s intention to try again with Casey -at least she didn’t want Casey to think that was her purpose- but she wanted to keep her promise to y/n.

After a year or so, they both had finally agreed that they wanted to see where things could go, Casey hesitated a lot, but eventually, she let her heart open one more time, and thankfully…this time, was the right time. Now, seven years later, they had bought a beautiful house, had tried to get pregnant, which at the end, it was decided that Casey would go through the procedure, and had their beautiful baby girl with beautiful red hair and blue eyes. Casey had felt bad and guilty when she had started dating Alex again, but she knew in her heart that it was the right decision. In Casey’s heart, she admitted that she loved y/n endlessly, she had been her lover, her sunshine through the darkness, but she figured out that at the end of the day…Alex had been the love of her life. It took her a while to accept it, but eventually, she came to terms with it.

Alex smiled softly as she looked back at Harper. “She was someone special for mommy. A very special person.” She turned to look at Casey.

Casey smiled softly as she looked at Alex, her whole body warming. She then turned to look at Harper and nodded. “She was part of my life for a few years, and she was someone very special. I keep her close to my heart.”

Harper smiled softly. “I wish I could met her.”

Alex chuckled softly as she knelt down and fixed her coat. “I could have met her. But yes…she was a nice and kind person.”

Casey stared at both of them for a moment, as if she wanted to take a mental picture of this very moment. Y/n would’ve loved her name…she always mentioned that Grace was her favorite name, and Alex was happy to give it to their daughter. Y/n would’ve loved to meet her too. Casey took a deep breath before she put the picture in her briefcase, kneeling down too and wrapping her arms around both Alex and Harper.

“Well, princess. We gotta get to school now. If you want to walk in the park for a bit, we gotta go now.” Casey grinned softly.

“The park! Yes! Lessgo!” Harper ran to the door and opened it, waiting outside and yelling for her moms.

Casey stood up along with Alex, smiling softly at her. “Thank you.”

Alex smiled, wrapping her arm around Casey. “She was someone special. And that’s how she should be remembered.”

Casey nodded softly, leaning in, and kissing her lips softly. “Let’s go.” She said softly as she grabbed Alex’s hand and pulled her to the door, laughing as she saw how excited her daughter was.

Casey thought she could never open her heart to anyone else after what she had gone through in the past, but she was lucky enough to say that she had been loved by a sweet and kind person, and now, she was still being loved by the love of her life. Even if sometimes things don't go the way we want them to, there’s always a chance that things will be for the better.

[batsplat]

hello i saw in your tags that you don't think people on here get casey stoner and as someone relatively new into the sport i would love to hear your thoughts <3

(context here) okay first of all, this post will be framed as ‘things I wish people talked about more with regards to casey stoner’, rather than arguing against what I think people think

I've tried to come up with a concise response to this ask but kept heading into thesis-length territory. so I decided to write a bullet point list and it’s still… yeah… but well it could be worse. if you, dear anon, wish to read thousands of words of casey stoner lore then please let me know. otherwise, here are just a few things I find interesting about this bloke:

casey has a very complex relationship with the concept of confidence, both in other riders and himself, in the sense that he KNOWS how important it is but also believes/wishes that he specifically is kinda above all that

this feeds into how he wishes that racing were Just Racing and not all this other stuff… not his brain not his body not other racers being assholes on/off track not talking to journalists or doing photoshoots not having to deal with politics etc etc - central underlying tension of his career

he has openly spoken about not ever really enjoying race day, saying the only thing he's missed after retiring is qualifying. very perfectionist, the anxiety, the over-thinking, craving control… all key casey traits

(which also ties in with the valentino rivalry, because valentino obviously adores racing (in particular wheel-to-wheel battle) but he’s also great at all that other off-track stuff)

some very rigid ideas of How The Sport Should Look, which you can see in everything from how he talks about racing standards to the introduction of CRT riders (he had it OUT for them, head hot every time aleix espargaro shows up in parc fermé) to valentino’s influence on ducati and the importance of the colour red

let him have his mean streak! the grim satisfaction in discussing jorge’s 2008 injuries after his early-season arrogance towards casey, the dismissiveness towards dani, some of the wilder valentino remarks (this isn’t a criticism to be clear, alien-on-alien violence is part of the natural order of things)

casey is a classic case of ‘just because you’re paranoid, doesn’t mean they aren’t after you’. definitely a suspicious guy and perpetual underdog 'me against the world' mindset. not to get too psychoanalytic-y, but I reckon this was partly born out of how he had to leave australia as a teenager (with his family completely dependent on him succeeding) because of how the racing establishment down under fucked him over

they definitely were out to get him a lot of the time, cf yamaha and then ducati drama plus the slander from some of the greats of the sport, fellow riders, the media etc etc (particularly egregious in 2009 when he was dealing with his mystery illness and a lot of people said some pretty unpleasant stuff in his absence - here is just one example)

his struggles were constantly downplayed. the chronic fatigue misdiagnosed as lactose intolerance led to people calling him weak-minded, broken, running away from the sport (part of why he was so allergic to the idea his results might in any way be connected to what was going on in his head). add in the undiagnosed anxiety and you have all this invisible strife people wouldn't even take seriously

that being said, he definitely did have a propensity for jumping to the worst possible conclusions

two specific examples: firstly from his autobiography, where he makes the claim that valentino may have been sabotaged in the 2006 title decider and was deliberately given a rubbish tyre to make him lose the championship - to which casey’s response was: “welcome to my world, mate”. he does have a tendency to believe he’s being sabotaged, and is constantly on the look out for conspiracies even when they are… unlikely

the other example is mat oxley talking about his issues with casey in his stint working for ducati, partly based on a misunderstanding:

something allegedly written about him in 2001!

let’s just say he can definitely hold a grudge

the moaner stoner stuff was definitely nasty, calling him mopey and whiny and all of that, but he also has never shied away from some good old-fashioned complaining (some of this was a bit of a spiral - complaining for good reason worsening public perception of him leading to more reasons to complain)

see also the lingering marc grudge, who probably did play a significant part in getting casey kicked out of honda (as casey has accused him of). whether marquez prevented stoner from racing in 2015 is more of an open question. casey still speaks about how honda made a mistake by only listening to marc (which, again, does have some truth to it)

casey was always very quick to shut down the idea that momentum, motivation, confidence etc could affect his results (unlike that of his competitors) because he argues he was always very rational & clear-sighted about when things were his fault & when things could be blamed on the bike + extraneous factors. he really goes into detail about this when discussing 2008 laguna seca in his autobiography, which he argues had no effect on him psychologically (but was followed by him crashing out of the lead of the next two races)

has definitely spoken more about his rivalry with valentino than valentino has, which probably has also helped shape perception of it over time

on ‘ambition outweighed talent’ - I feel like people almost understate just what a (hilariously) out of pocket remark it was in context. it was rossi’s second ever race at ducati (and the start of his season was impacted by his shoulder issues) - and the rain meant he had a ~win it or bin it~ approach because he knew it was as good a chance as he might get for some time (despite starting from 12th). the move on stoner for second place was at best optimistic, most definitely impatient and at worst foolish - but sort of understandable in that situation, rossi was definitely rapid, and this stuff can happen in the wet. in that sense, it was obviously more a reaction to the manner of the apology (and his frustration with the stewards) than to what casey himself described as a racing incident

stoner made a remark in his autobiography about how rossi had stolen 25 points in a title battle he was never going to be a part of (oof). whether you're obligated to race title contenders differently is already a bit sketch but certainly should not be a consideration for anybody in round TWO

he was forced to publicly retract the remarks, though he doubled down on them to a deeply funny extent in his autobiography by suggesting they were true of valentino’s entire career and that he’d just benefited from a weak era. rossi mostly took it on the chin especially when interviewed about it for documentaries, probably because with something like that you do just need to take the L

it's understandable how it’s become such a defining image of their rivalry (along with laguna seca), not least because of how evocative the whole thing is - rossi showing up still wearing his helmet, trying to make a PR apology stick while he’s been eating nauseating amounts of humble pie at ducati; stoner casual as you like, pissed off about the points loss while still indulging in schadenfreude about how the Great Big Ducati Adventure is working out for rossi

but again, I think it’s funnier because of just HOW over the top an insult it was in that situation (and more broadly how it does have a different vibe to their interactions when they were meaningfully competing, aka 2007-2008)

in conclusion: casey has his doubts and his insecurities and his obsessions and his foibles… a complicated guy in his own right

and a big thing I’d like to stress here is that the rivalry with valentino does benefit from treating them both as somewhat unreliable narrators

I just think he's neat

[beanarie]

21 hours

i just kept rolling around the moment from my last fic when tommy said "i turn into the unabomber when i get scared, just ask hen and howie" and i wondered, what could possibly be scarier than thinking he might lose buck right after getting him back. (tw: panic attacks)

~

Hen's feelings on Tommy Kinard are... malleable. He was trash when they met, and for a solid few months after that. They remained on the same crew, struggling and bleeding and getting each other out of scrapes. That built a measure of trust. After Gerrard and the worst of his minions vanished, he changed. Became almost sweet. He and Chimney, who had always been okay, hit it off like a house on, you know. Hen liked this new version of her teammate, who seemed to be finding his feet after losing some seriously bad influences. She enjoyed their group hangouts. Maybe a year after his transfer to Air Ops, her friend Casey shared that Tommy was gay and out to his new unit, which, good for him.

She never forgot the asshole who helped make her feel like she would never belong, but he got smaller over time, easily overtaken by whoever Tommy felt like showing her.

The call today was going fine until it all went to hell, another unwelcome similarity to the night Buck got struck by lightning. The victims were alert and on their feet, ambulating on their own power right ahead of him, when he saw the heavy mahogany shelving unit lose its moorings and shoved the family out of the way just in time. That of course put him right in its path.

For a long, terrible minute while he was pinned she and Chim thought they didn't have a pulse. But it was there. They found it eventually. And he made it to the hospital without crashing.

Having heard a little about Buck's efforts to rekindle their relationship (along with his feeble arguments that they were strictly platonic), Hen isn't shocked when Tommy shows up at the waiting room. But she wasn't expecting the asshole.

Chimney eyes her, asking if she's seeing what he is. They recognize this man. The linebacker set of the shoulders, the distancing lift to his chin. Bobby asks him if he wants coffee, and he simply wrinkles his nose.

He's pissed. Maybe he blames them for letting Buck get hurt.

"Enough," Eddie says, flinging himself out of the chair. "We're taking a walk."

"Don't speak for me," Tommy spits out.

"Now," he growls.

Surprisingly, Tommy goes, but Hen isn't sure that's a good thing. Eddie has a history of making problems worse with his fists. Chim is on the phone with Maddie, figuring out the logistics of two scared parents who can't be in two places at the same time. He's no help. Hen considers asking Bobby if they're gonna let Buck's sort of ex and his best friend lay each other out while he's in emergency surgery. But he's never really up for mediating nonsense when one of them is badly hurt, especially not when it's Buck.

The surgeon comes out and speaks for a moment. Hen now has a compelling reason to intervene. She turns a corner and soon finds them. Eddie leaning in, glaring, while Tommy cuts him off and stalks away a few paces.

"You're not even trying," Eddie says tightly.

"Shut up." Tommy whirls back the way he came, breathing hard.

"Three things. Chim's baby could do it and he can't even sit up by himself."

"One day, Eddie. One. Are you fucking kidding me?"

Hen blinks. Tommy sounds like he's holding back tears.

"Tommy, man, come on. If you pass out and end up in the bed right next to Buck, he'll 100 percent blame me. Get it together."

The dots connect themselves. The pacing. The irregular breathing. Eddie prompting him to list three things. Tommy is having a panic attack.

"Guys?" Hen says. Tommy's head snaps up. Their eyes meet and if she wasn't already sure, this would do it. That isn't anger. That's pure terror. "Surgery went well. They're wheeling Buck into recovery. They said someone can go be with him when they bring him around."

"Tommy's going," Eddie announces. "If he can remember how to breathe."

Tommy has a hand on his own chest. "Dickhead."

"Hen, can you walk him over?" Eddie raises one shaking hand. "I need to sit for a minute."

Tommy's eyes widen. "Shit, Eddie, I didn't even ask." Tommy comes close to invading Eddie's space, stopping only when Eddie holds him off.

Eddie gives him a half-smile. "I'm fine, Tom. The rest of us are all fine. It's just an adrenaline dump. I'm gonna call my kid and let him bitch about organic chemistry and the school musical until my heart stops pounding." He squeezes Tommy's shoulder and gives him a shove. "Go on."

All the way down the hall, Tommy mutters to himself, trying to do what Eddie asked and regulate his breathing, but it doesn't seem to be working.

"What happened yesterday?" Hen asks curiously, stuck on his earlier comment.

He's so surprised his lungs stutter to a complete stop. He looks down at her, blinking hard, and he shakes himself. "We agreed to try again," he says.

"Damn," she blurts out, and almost apologizes before he lets out a humorless little laugh.

"I know!"

She doesn't tell him how it felt to watch her son coding not two weeks after they got her daughter back. She's not sure how to say this is just their lives, that the only reason they get through it is because they have each other. He's spent enough time observing them.

They've reached the recovery room. Tommy cracks his neck and straightens his spine. "Hen?" he asks, tentatively, pausing with one hand on the double doors. "Do you need to go home? Karen-"

"Isn't expecting anything but updates from me until morning," Hen says. This isn't a regular day.

He nods. "Can you stick around? Some of these doctors suck at communicating and- and I want to make sure I'm ready for whatever he's gonna need."

So maybe he has figured it out. "No problem, Tommy. I'll be right here."

"Thank you." He takes a deep breath and pushes the doors open. Through the split second sliver before they swing shut again, she catches a glimpse of Buck on the gurney, his face mottled with purple from the books that flew off the top shelf (an encyclopedia, like they used to keep in the '90s). He looks terrible. When he wakes up for real, he's gonna feel even worse. But she's pretty sure he'll be just fine.

[nerves-nebula]

hiiiii i have questions abt the 'leo lets his brothers leave' universe:

is there even any chance of leo like,,,,, EVER forgiving or liek not wanting to kill(?) his brothers for leaving him? do the other three ever think they fucked up by leaving and feel guilty at all, or try to do anything to fix things with leo? (as much as they could ever possibly be fixed lolll) do any of their friends find out what happened? (specifically april or casey?) and do they think the three were kinda fucked up for leaving leo to be abused and manipulated and sa'd by his dad for years?

Great questions!

1. There is definitely a chance for redemption (tho I don’t really like that word) for everyone involved but first leo has to have a massive breakdown. Think azula from atla. It has to be messy and violent and unhinged and probably end with him restrained in some way lol. The road to recovery for this leo will be way tougher. People will say cruel things they can’t take back :p

2. Yes and no. At the point where they leave none of them really know how bad it is for Leo. They still think he’s splinters pampered favorite who never gets hurt as bad as they do. And since he didn’t want to come with them at the time, and they’re small children with a limited worldview, they kind of just assumed that was always the case. They miss him and think about him but they don’t really feel guilty or like they abandoned him until he comes back spitting vitriol. (Though they know from April that he’s become increasingly unpleasant, they chalk it up to his usual Leo Sucks behavior)

And even then they dont feel TOO bad until they figure out what actually happened. idk if Leo would even talk about tho he’s probably convinced that he hasn’t been abused and assumes all his feelings of rage and betrayal are cuz his brothers abandoned him- they might have to do a memory trip about it to get the to the truth. And even then it would be a significantly more brutal experience than the canon Leo memory trip.

3. Their friends don’t blame them cuz they were literally soooo young. Like the oldest was 13. I’m not sure if they meet Casey the same way tho. Raph originally met Casey while healing from his broken arm after their failed attempt to run away. If they’re in the hidden city most of the time I don’t actually think they’d meet Casey until later.

In fact it’s far more likely that Casey meets April and Leo long before he meets any of the rest of them, so he’d probably be sort of on Leo’s side. But since he knows April she’s able to tell him their side too. Casey has experience with splintered (haha) siblings so he gets it and tries not to pick sides, but since Leo’s his friend he’ll be on Leo’s side if he has to choose.

At least until he falls for Leo’s brother with resting bitch face, but then again fist fighting your gay crush is also a fantasy of his so if leo brings him to a brotherly conversation that turns into a brawl he’s not gonna pass it up…

April is solidly on the boys side tho cuz she’s received a lot of abuse from Leo (especially when she refused to tell him where his brothers went) so she gets why they didn’t bring him with. In this timeline he’s kind of a horrible menace. His relationship with April is super strained

Also important to note that while Leo got most of it, they were all abused and manipulated by splinter, and raph was also sexually abused. So like yes it’s terrible but also it’s not like leo has a monopoly on suffering here (though he’d beg to differ)