#we might not have the best start of the season but we will have the silly goofy man (affectionate) all the same
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norrisainz33 · 1 day ago
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the call pt 2 || platonic grid & gr63
summary: y/n finishes out the triple header strong after being called up to race for alpine
pairing: platonic!grid x george russell x rookie!driver!reader
fc & warnings: none and minor hate comments, bad language, and bad grammar from my end
a/n: i've never had this many people request a part 2 before so i hope y'all enjoy!! I'm going to keep her racing in the remainder of the season so keep an eye out for the rest.
part 1
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
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alpinef1team: a point in the bag for pierre and another good drive for y/n 💼
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user2: solid result for the team!!! y/n ate in her second race ever
user99: a team of losers tbh
ynuser: yay for points! let’s go pierregasly
pierregasly: we go again in brazil! points for both of us there 😉
ynuser: everyone better make sure to bet on us 🙂‍↔️
yourbff: let’s go best friend(s)!!!!
ynuser: 🫶🏻
georgerussell63: great stuff ynuser
ynuser: thanks georgie
user1: notice how he is always supporting her…. is there something here?
user2: they’ve been friends since their karting days!! if you asked me back when they were in f2 if they were tg i would’ve said yes bc they were kinda sus but now idk
user1: gonna go research the lore on their f2 days
you let out a huff as you threw your padel racket on the ground and wiped the sweat from your brow, “god dammit lance! how are you so good at this!?”
laughing lance shrugged, “maybe you and george are just really bad!”
george shook his head, “no mate that can’t be it!”
you took a long drink of your water as the pair continued to bicker. “did you both see the weather for the weekend?” you asked changing the subject so they’d stop.
“yeah, lots of rain it seems.” lance put his racket into his bag and looked up at you with concern. “have you raced in the rain before?”
you shook your head, “no not really. i mean when i was karting yes but outside of that not really.”
“blimey y/n/n,” george ran a hand through his hair. “you’ve been going over those scenarios with your team right? there’s a chance of some really heavy rain.”
“i have, i have. i’ll be ok!” you assured them both with a smile but your friends looked anything but reassured.
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user2: jesus christ you’re so hot
user4: im obsessed with you holy f
georgerussell63: green is a good color on you. tho i think mercedes blue is better
ynuser: you mean alpine blue and pink
georgerussell63: nah i’d like to see you in my colors
ynuser: oh?
georgerussell63: you heard me
francocolapinto: 👀
ynuser: and you’re coming to play with us next time yea?
francocolapinto: si bonita
yourbff: H O T
ynuser: thanks bb
ynuser: also i think george might be flirting in my dms rn?
yourbff: WHAT?!
ynuser: he said he wants to see me in his mercedes kit
yourbff: oh that’s 🤭
landonorris: you look tall here
ynuser: thanks shortie 🩷
landonorris: uncalled for
user5: thanking your parents for doing it tbh
holding in a yawn you turned to walk back to your garage after the brazilian national anthem. the 5am wake up for this ‘super sunday’ as they were calling it was catching up with you despite the butterflies swarming in your stomach. you had had the qualifying session of your life, which despite the cool confidence you played it off with in your interviews after, shocked you just as much as it shocked everyone else. you qualified in 4th. yes, you read that right, p4. something about the car came alive in the rain and you prayed it came alive again during the race but the rain was starting to pick up and it seemed like it was only going to get worse. you’d already seen several red flags in quali and would be lying to yourself if you said you weren’t terrified that that was about to become you in the race.... especially with the threat of the entire field behind you, including max verstappen, wanting to push forward and push forward fast regardless of the consequences.
“y/n!” a hushed voice caught your attention. george had caught up to you and had a serious look on his face. “please be careful out there,” he pleaded.
“you too george,” you squeezed his arm lightly. “i’ll see you on the podium, yeah?"
"yeah," george winked as you turned to head into the alpine garage.
your engineer, james, handed you your helmet as he went over a few more pieces of data. he was stressing over the litany of different plans the team had put together in the very short window between quali and now. the heavy rain and your heroic lap times caused just about everything your team had prepped to be turned upside down.
“right, right i’ve got it james. plan a seems the most logical if i can keep everyone behind me.” you said as you pulled your helmet onto your head and fastened the strap.
things were about to get interesting.
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f1: the race is stopped under the red flag for a crash….. and y/n y/l/n is our new race leader! after running a surprisingly strong p4 for the first half of the race, she took the lead when those in front pitted for new tyres. y/n is the only woman in history to lead a lap in a grand prix
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user1: not them calling her performance surprising 🥴
user2: I KNOW THATS RIGHT!
user12: only gonna last a second. she can’t even compete with the likes of verstappen
alpinef1team: @ everyone behind, y/n.. can we pretty please keep it this way?
yourbff: real tears are being shed rn this is monumental
user9: god is this amazing
mercedesamgf1: we love to see this historical moment! even if we’re coming to take it back 😉
user11: literally the most amazing thing i’ve seen all day
you ripped another tear off from your helmet wishing it would make it easier to see but to your dismay, you still couldn’t see a damn thing. the rain was coming down in buckets, your inters were worn, you were fighting the car even in the straight lines to keep it on the track and worst of all, you were scared shitless. you had no moment to even be happy about your current position in p1 because you were too busy trying not to send your car into the barrier.
“max is 2 seconds behind you and gaining very quickly. gasly is 1.2 seconds behind max and leclerc is 0.9 behind pierre.” james updated you on the radio which sent you into a fit of rage.
“james for fucks sake i don’t care!!! stop giving me timing updates!! i can’t see the road so i can’t do anything about it!!!” you almost screamed. "i can't even pass half throttle!"
“rain is expected to lighten in about 10 laps,” james reported ignoring your outburst.
“10 LAPS?! how am i supposed to survive 10 laps?!?!?” as you yelled you felt the rear of your car start to slide causing you to need to quickly snap it back into place. “there is so much standing water james - i can’t keep doing this. the front straight is like a swimming pool!”
“yes you can, y/n. lock in and calm down. you only have a couple of laps left in this class of rain.”
“lock in? calm down!? and what if i crash this damn car first?!” turning off your radio you tried to take a few deep breaths while focusing on the road in front of you. you couldn’t panic - that would only make matters worse. you had to stay calm. you knew your car, you knew to deviate off the racing line to avoid the slippery curbs in specific turns, and you knew that you had to make it through whether you wanted to or not. panicking was not going to help anyone but there was little way to explain just how scary it was on track at this current moment.
another snap of significant oversteer left you breathless and near tears. “james im so serious - i need wets and even then i don’t think they’re going to be enough. there's standing water on every part of this track. i can't race like this on these tyres. please talk to fia. please we need a red flag.”
“pitting doesn’t make sense right now, you’ll come out in traffic and your race will be over.”
“i care more about making it out of this race alive than coming out in traffic.”
“understood.”
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“they couldn’t have taken any longer with that red flag could they?” you snapped as you pulled your race suit down to your hips.
“no they really couldn’t have! it was getting ridiculous out there.” pierre grabbed his water bottle, "driving couldn't have been more dangerous."
“alright you two! thats enough!" your team principal interrupted, looking very serious. "we have a real chance of keeping this double podium finish especially because george and lando pitted before this red flag and lost a lot of time," he explained. "y/n, you’re going to have to push, there’s not much chance you’ll be able to keep max behind you but we’ve got to be fast enough to keep george, charles and lando behind pierre.”
right... keep 3 of the fastest drivers on the grid behind you both.. you were going to need a real stroke of luck.
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alpinef1team: THEY DID IT!!! Y/N AND PIERRE CROSS THE LINE AS P2 AND P3! HISTORY MADE
"thats p2 y/n - great job! the entire team and i are so fcking proud of you."
"AHHH YES YESSSSSSS!!!!" you screamed into the radio, banging your hands against the steering wheel, "WE DID IT!! WE DID IT JAMES!!" the emotions hit you like a brick wall, and tears quickly began falling. "thank you all so much. thank you for this opportunity. thank you to the mechanics, to everyone back at the factory, to every single one of you. thank you for believing in me when no one else did."
"you're welcome, y/n. you deserve it. you deserve it all kid."
pierre rolled up next to you to drive the remainder of the cool down lap by your side. he waved excitedly and you waved back without hesitation - you both had achieved what felt like the impossible.
you were the first woman to ever stand up on the podium and you were the first woman to score points in formula 1, but you knew you certainly weren't going to be the last. if you would do anything with your remaining races, it would be to show the world just how much women belong in this sport.
you pulled into parc ferme and shut off your car as quickly as you could. you fumbled with your straps and when you finally got them off, pierre was standing above you with his hand held out. you smiled, grabbing his hand and allowing him to pull you out of the car. "we did it, p -" you said just loud enough for him to hear over the cheering.
"we did it, y/n/n." pierre replied and with that, you both turned and ran hand in hand to your team who was waiting with open arms to greet their heroes.
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ynuser: we did it 🩷 thank you to alpine for believing in me, thank you to pierre for being the best teammate a girl could ask for, thank you to my friends and family for supporting me through the ups and the downs and thank you to my fans -- i love you all so much
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user1: i've never shed so many tears over a race before
yourbff: i feel like a proud parent rn
ynuser: thanks for never giving up on me bestie
georgerussell63: you're a force to be reckoned with y/n. congratulations on an impressive drive! today is your day 🤍
ynuser: mark your calendars! 11/3 is national y/n day
landonorris: speechless... i am so proud of you. if someone had to be up there besides me, i'm so glad it was you 😉
ynuser: thank you lanny. only thing that would have made it better is if you were with me up there 🩷
user10: tea LOL
francisca.cgomes: i dont think i've ever been happier?? my two favorite people are on that podium?
ynuser: stop dont make me cry agAIN
pierregasly: thankful for you mon ami
ynuser: 🤍🩷
lewishamilton: being a barrier breaker is never easy y/n but you are crushing it. i am proud to race with you!
ynuser: you have no idea how much this means to me lewis
user9: thank you from the bottom of my heart for continuing to prove everyone wrong
user95: nothing could have prepared me for 1) them running hand and hand to their team, 2) y/n crying tears of joy on the podium and 3) gr63 picking y/n up and twirling her around in parc ferme
user2: george and y/n were so cute it was actually sickening. did you see the way he fixed her hair after putting her down
user95: and how he wiped away her tears??? yeah i saw it 🥹
user2: i want them together so bad
user10: you are going down in the history books
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thank you for reading!!! likes, feedback and reblogs are welcome!! massively appreciate all of the support on this little series. i am really enjoying it too
tag list from part 1: @yawn-zi @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @divagreymare @raizelchrysanderoctavius @ferakillia @stressed-cherry @sassyangel16 @mxdi0 @awritingtree @danielricciardoslut3 @dying-inside-but-its-classy @seasonswinter @rawr-123s-stuff @grussellsprout @belncaldern @ellelabelle @rafeyybabyy
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
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mistresscitrusslice · 20 hours ago
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The Season 2 Opening. We Must Discuss.
First of all, small beans. Instead of static, lifeless statues, this time we get moving humans. Mel features significantly more than I expected, so she'll probably be a much more major character than I expected for a non-champion character and I'm so happy for her. I believe the use of moving people instead of statues signifies that immense change will be happening. What we thought was literally set in stone in Season 1 will be turned on its head in Season 2.
Okay, on to the really concerning matters.
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Yuhuh. Jinx moves too fast for me to get a good screenshot, but she gestures like this around her face a lot. I think we all already know about the Caitlyn-Jinx parallels, but my sister suggests it could be a red herring for the actual resemblances she has to Silco.
Sis gets credit for the following observation, but Caitlyn's daydream sequences about shooting Jinx are controlled and clearly separated from reality unlike Jinx's.
However, sis has not seen ep 2 yet, where Caitlyn does have that moment in the arcade where she shoots her vision of Jinx among the wooden dummies. Not only does this more closely resemble Jinx's hallucinations, it also parallels Jinx shooting the harmless crow in s1 e5. By the time the strike squad are about to leave, she can clearly tell that what she thought might be Jinx was really just a harmless wooden standee. Startling, but harmless. She shoots it anyway.
Caitlyn is totally gonna spiral more, and maybe she'll start losing her grip on reality too, but for now, she has more in common with Silco than she does with Jinx. Did anyone else get reminded of Silco's coat when Ambessa put the supervillain cape on Caitlyn? The collars don't look similar but they still eerily resemble each other, you get me?
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Ok back to intro stuff
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Vi wipes off her name from her face. That's two tattoos that are rendered impermanent in this opening theme. In the Fenty x Arcane video, they mention that Mel's golden freckles are tattoos. Later in the intro song, we also see her golden freckles gone. Change, impermanence. That seems to be a theme here.
Vi is literally erasing her name from her face. In any normal circumstance, I'd say that means she wants a change of identity, a desire to start over. However, I know that Vi's League lore involves amnesia. Does she really drink herself into that bad of a stupor? Jkjk. I assumed that her amnesia was replaced by the Stillwater imprisonment to explain how she got topside and with the enforcers, but perhaps I was wrong. Maybe they do still intend to go the amnesia or partial amnesia route with her.
The teasers implied that Vi shares the genetic trait that has Jinx predisposed to hallucinations. It's possible that this eventually contributes to her loss of memory, but I wouldn't call it quite yet. However, if this happens during her emo era when I'm assuming she has no support system, she'll be very vulnerable, unlike if it were to happen while she was still partnered with Caitlyn, in which case they could easily fill in most blanks in her memory.
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I have no idea what to make of this. It's clear as day what they're paralleling, but why? Why the flashlight scene? My best guess is that they're trying to draw on déjà vu, implying a repetition of history, but why this particular moment? They could've easily chosen anything else in Jayce's s1 arc. He has many more memorable moments than this. Let's see, I'm literally making this up as I go.
This meeting was a pivotal moment for Jayce. Both his meeting with Viktor and his meeting with Mel changed his fate. The Viktor one is pretty self-explanatory, but without meeting Mel, they would've both just gotten exiled or locked up again. With Mel, they had someone in power who could vouch for them.
That begs the question, is Jayce meeting someone new? Or is this a reintroduction to someone he's already known before, a new meeting after a long time apart or after a significant change, maybe a change in them both. I believe it must be someone who was involved in the original hallway scene.
Jayce is either looking at Mel again or at Viktor. Given the amount of Viktor/Mel parallels in Season 1, I believe Jayce is looking at Viktor after he's undergone his likely final evolution. That'll obviously be another pivotal moment for him... but will it be a good one like it was with Mel? Viktor has power now. He's performing miracles. He's, like, two steps away from parting the Pilt River like it's the Red Sea. He seems to hold a grudge against Jayce, though, for *checks notes* saving his life? Jk I know he feels like he's losing autonomy and like Jayce didn't respect his wishes with the Hexcore and Jayce obviously couldn't let Viktor die when he'd fought so hard to stay alive before.
Anyway, I feel like this could easily be both a good omen and a bad omen for Jayce. More than anything, I feel like it'll be an epiphany. He is quite literally seeing the light. The light at the end of the dark tunnel? The light of the heavens at the end of his life? The light of a revelation sent by a god he once knew as a man?
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Seeing Mel screaming bloody murder during the opening, this was the first place my mind went to. The pose doesn't match up exactly, and Jinx/Powder's screams are definitely wilder, but I feel like there's definitely something here. Is there anyone else who screams like this, thrusting their head forward and keeping their arms back?
We also see the shadow hands from this earlier shot:
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I'm thinking of the Black Rose (is that their name?) kidnapping her in thin air, incorporeal hands reaching at her and snatching my joy the love of my life Mel away. It could also represent people grasping at the power Mel wields, both as the wealthiest Council member and as a Noxian princess, one of the closest people to Ambessa, the one wielding the most power right now.
Mel is really out of her depth right now. Her power and influence is up for grabs if she dares to blink and let her guard down. I'm also surprised that we don't see her fight back at all when there's danger around. I thought she might have more battle experience as she was raised by Ambessa. For those people wondering about her magical powers, I think she would've used them by now if she had them. Council attack aside, which could've been Viktor's magic, she wasn't able to do anything about the memorial attack or her own kidnapping. I think they're trying to show us that Mel is not as untouchable as she presents herself. Under the right circumstances, she's just as vulnerable as any civilian.
The sliver of light? My sister pointed out that it looks just like the crack of light between two double doors. Almost closed... or barely open? It appears in pretty much everyone's shot in the opening, but it's right down the center of Mel's face here. Is she torn between two sides? Is this about an impossible choice she has to make?
The spotlight is also on her. That's two sources of light. It looks like a red sun. All eyes on her as the surviving voice of the Council?
And her expression... shock, fear, horror. The heavy breathing, the look on her face... I feel eerily like I've seen it on someone else before. I can't place who, but I'm getting déjà vu from this. Does anyone else recognize this expression and these mannerisms?
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lucygraysboy · 4 hours ago
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“i hope so. i mean, i’ve already missed out on so many milestones, so many important events. i want to be a part of his life again, want him to know that he can actually count on me.” of course, it will take time, but billy won’t give up. “that’s good. i didn’t know you were such a lightweight,  though, lucy gray,” he teases, gently elbowing her side. “maybe i could repost them or share them with my friends? manuela really loves handmade quilts. i think she’s still lookin’ for one for the baby’s nursery.” his follower count keeps growing, and maybe he could use his platform to promote mama baird’s shop. do something good. “i spoke to her this mornin’, don’t know if you overheard any of that? i cried, think she might have shed a tear or two, too,” he admits bashfully, just wanting to let her know he’s serious about all this — he wants to come back and stay in their lives, be his old self again. “aww, look at the little one, does the baby have a name yet? you’re such a good bonus momma, lucy gray. oh, that’s a big gulp. it’s gonna be a big, strong horsey one day.” gushing as she shows him the video, his heart meting into a puddle. her love for animals is admirable. she’s so naturally sweet and nurturing. “oh, i am, don’t worry ‘bout it. i stay vigilant, always have a helmet on. i’ll take you on a ride one day if you’re not too scared,” he teases, poking her cheek because he can tell that she’s genuinely concerned about his safety. blair never gave a shit. he clearly did the right thing by breaking up with her. “you still have to meet ‘em. they’re great people. i’ll arrange something when you get to new york. they’ve heard so many stories about you, bet they’re dying to actually speak to you.” a sweet smile tugs at the corners of billy’s lips, just thinking about finally introducing his childhood best friend to these kind people has him feeling all warm inside. they’ll love her. “hey, if your schedule isn’t too busy by the time we start workin’ on season two, you can always join me or visit for a day or two.” the driver eventually pulls up in front of the steakhouse, and billy thanks him for getting them there, makes sure to tip him in the app before climbing out and circling around the car to open the door for lucy gray.
“it will take time, but as long as you try and be patient with him even when it feels hopeless— things will mend back together.” it’ll show he’s actually got a good big brother side to him, after all. “it feels better. thank you for askin’. that nap helped a lot.” still a little tired, but for the most part, she’s bounced back to life. “i can probably dig up some pictures on her business facebook page.” there’s a lot of pictures of her quilts, toys and shirts and things on there, she remembers. “oh, i’ll be sure to tell her that then.” that he’s kept that sweater of hers, it’ll make her happy. “well— she is one of the horses we took in, her name is moon. i got to bottle feed the baby and it was an adorable experience,” lucy gray laughs, opening her camera roll to the video of her feeding the foal a bottle. the video making her warmly smile at how adorable the baby horse looks sucking on a bottle. “mhm.” her response to maude ivory who is an angel but also a little mischievous. “a motorcycle? oh, no. i hope you’re bein’ extra safe. too many cars have too many reckless drivers in them, that make motorcyclist vulnerable.” they’re bad enough here, let alone in new york. the thought he’s into motorcycles now doesn’t create any happiness across her face as she’s looking down at her phone then closing the screen back off. “that’s wonderful, i’m happy for your friends.” the news of someone starting a family lifts a smile back up on her face as doe eyes flicker on his face, accidentally finding a glimpse of his mouth and her brain doing this weird thing of reminding her how he has such pretty lips. the way his mouth is shaped— the way his lips kind of do this curl thing , there’s something so attractive and prince charming about it. something significant in the way god carved out his mouth and chin area, because she certainly never notices that about anyone else’s lips. then lucy gray realizes she should stop thinkin’ about this all together. “oh, yeah,” eyes quickly returning on his blue gaze, “i would really like to see that set. i love playin’ dress up an’ i love horses,” she agrees peppily, grinning shyly for unknown reasons.
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agoldenblackbird · 3 days ago
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i'm gonna be a ranty bitch for a minute.
tbh i'm turned off even reading new buddie fic despite being a multishipper and have unfollowed a bunch of buddie accounts because i'm sick of the smug attitudes. one ask that i am otherwise not going to publish or respond to ended with 'sorry you don't understand media literacy bestie :)' fuck off. listen INFANT, i have been writing fanfic and original fic AND watching, reading and analyzing queer media since before you were born, i understand how character and story development works, and i know the difference between 'storyline i personally disliked' and 'bad writing.' this was BOTH, and it also was marketed to us as 'carefully crafted bi rep' and 'queer love story that is not about a bunch of pain and conflict FOR ONCE' so we have every right to be upset at the bait-and-switch.
the fact that i'm seeing the same exact posts - 'bt bones buddie CANON' that i saw three seasons ago after the bucktaylor breakup, or every time they thought buck and taylor MIGHT break up - says something. the fact that so many fans seem genuinely convinced (STILL!) that buddie is inevitable because there have been so many 'signs,' and then they rattle off a convoluted theory that would make the most hardcore taylor swift stan say 'wow, that's a bit of a reach,' honestly weirded me out a little when i first joined the 911 fandom. i have never been in a fandom where so many fans are insistent that their ship will be - not might be or could be, but WILL be - canon. i am skeptical both from past experience with other shows mishandling queer storylines or ship-baiting, and tim minnear's proven track record with this one of not really knowing what to do with buck's LI's. but i didn't want to yuck anybody's yum, so i let them have their theories and squee in peace, and unfollowed or blocked certain tags if i was seeing too much of it and getting annoyed. it's too out there for me, but i'm glad they're having fun!
yet they can't give us the same courtesy. they deride us as delusional for thinking that a canon pairing that was presented to us both in promo and the show itself as different and important (eg the bobby approval convo and 'buck getting off the hamster wheel') might last, and we're stupid to have ever liked tommy or lou or be disappointed at how the breakup was written, and if we point out the biphobia it's just sour grapes.
the bucktommy breakup is not the first time 911 has started out strong with an interesting storyline and fumbled it in the 4th quarter either because the writers got bored or in the name of needless drama/a 'gotcha' sudden twist. amir & bobby, eddie's fight club arc, the sperm donor SL, hen vs councilwoman ortiz, whatever the hell is going on with harry, the whole mess with shannon/kim, just to name a few. and especially the past couple of seasons, for me since 6b, the pacing has been off. they seem to have too much happening at once and many of the storylines don't have enough room to breathe to be narratively satisfying, or they get resolved in ways that feel lackluster.
if the toxic buddie stans who have been attacking lou on sm and sending death threats (wtf!) actually get what they want, which i admit is possible, but it's certainly not guaranteed….i don't know why they think the writers won't fumble that just as badly. it's not going to happen precisely the way they want it to because it is impossible to please everybody, that's what fanfic is for. but at this point i have zero faith that it would even be well done at all, and zero trust in the writers not to just sabotage or regress a character for funsies, and that's an excellent reason to stop watching the show. in most of my other fandoms i regard canon as a jumping-off point or a blurry outline at best, and i can have just as much fun in the 911 sandbox without any further input from canon at all, once i'm less angry.
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inawickedlittletown · 3 days ago
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Sooo I started to read other articles. I didn't after reading the ones that came out right after the episode that justifiably got everyone upset.
This one from tv insider had Tim saying this:
Moving on to Buck and Tommy’s breakup, talk about your approach to it. Why was Tommy sure that Buck would break his heart?
Tommy’s older and Buck is very new to this, and whether Tommy was correct or not, I think what he felt like was exactly what he said: I’m not your last, I’m your first, which is a special thing to be, but as Tommy says, it doesn’t usually end up being the same thing. And I think based on what we know of Buck, he’s maybe not wrong. Buck’s a little impulsive when he’s feeling a certain kind of way. He’s like, move on in, bring your couch. So I just think because Tommy’s a little older and wiser or maybe at some level he feels like he doesn’t deserve Buck, I don’t know. But I think he accurately diagnosed Buck. Buck’s still figuring himself out, and boy, that would be quite risky to move in with that guy as much as you would love to.
That does seem to be Buck’s go-to, which isn’t the best.
Exactly.
Are we going to see Buck single for a significant period of time now? Is he trying to figure out what he wants really out of a relationship?
Yeah, I think that’s right. As Tommy said, you’re still figuring yourself out, and his options have increased by 50 percent of the population. So knowing Buck, that’s going to be choice overload. He’s got to navigate that with a little self-awareness.
--
So they definitely planned for this. That's what this reads like...they wanted to break them up so that they could send Buck through a period of exploration. Tim says everything Oliver said here in much nicer terms. His view of Buck is so...Idk, it's like he sees Buck as a kid that still doesn't know what he wants. And he decided to put that view right into Tommy's head too. It's a little jarring I guess but this show...has it ever been consistent?
What sucks is that 8x05 was written like they were doing so well. And then right off the back with 8x06 we have warning signs in the date scene with the girl that approaches Buck and how Tommy sort of shrugs off Buck checking her out. I really do wonder where hot waiter fit into this and I'm so glad we didn't see Tommy like checking hot waiter out or something. But I guess that scene was there to sow the seeds. We have Buck spiraling because of the Abby thing and we have Tommy maybe not realizing but reinforcing for himself that he's a stepping stone for Buck and being okay with it in the status quo.
The way that Tim speaks about Buck asking Tommy to move in, he makes it seem like Buck is just barreling in without thought...like if they went through with it Tommy might be proven right. But then what is the point of the scene with Josh where Buck is right on the cusp of an "I love you" just to then be like no actually Tommy knows how this ends and he can read Buck and knows they're not forever. But Tommy is not a mind reader.
Where there is hope is in that Tim doesn't outwardly say anything about Tommy being gone for good. As someone else pointed out the Lou interviews were done by buddie journalists with a bias so there is a question to how much that colored what we got and why they were so determined to close the door fully. Also...why did we get exit interviews in the first place for a character that only had three episodes...it's so odd.
The writers made a point of leaving this open. Do I think we'll get Tommy back any time soon. No. But after the doom and gloom and the time to mourn this a bit I want to be positive and there is really no knowing. Tim says he thinks Buck will be single for a while...okay fine...picture that being the rest of this season.
Buck won't just jump into another relationship...and Oliver gets his Buck slut era 2.0...what if S9 brings back Tommy? What if this is the long game...or at least the thing they can have in their back pocket if Lou is available later on to come back. But that's not something they can promise or that they can commit to and Lou isn't on contract clearly and Oliver wouldn't know if that's the plan...hell even Tim probably doesn't know if they'll do that. Or I'm giving him too much credit because as we've seen this season storylines have been rushed to close up at breakneck speeds so it would be an anomaly for him to prolong something like this.
All this to say, showing the network and Tim that bucktommy matters to a lot of people and that Tommy matters...it may just make a difference.
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wizardsnorlax · 3 days ago
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Ok so update on the Spiral Jon fic I'm writing: I'm getting it onto Ao3 bit by bit because it's super difficult to write on mobile, but I need to take a break and get ideas for the season three events out before they get lost, here's a link to the season 2 notes
Ok here we go
Melanie does not join the Archives, this is for the best
At one point in season 2 Jon gave Sasha Georgie's contact info for "in case of emergency" use so Sasha is gonna be (mostly) ok she just needs to pop an allergy pill every once in a while
Sasha might be good with the hardware of a computer but the software might as well be a completely different language so she's very little help with Georgie's show
Jon takes to reading Statements like I took to weed gummies
Sasha follows about the same trail of clues as Jon did in Canon but Daisy's grip on Sasha is a bit harder to hold so Sasha gets claw slashes on her arms instead of a knife at the throat
Things that have changed about Jon while Sasha was gone: his hair now has ringlet curls, the extra flexibility in his joints has progressed but not to the point anyone has noticed let alone would consider a problem and his eyes are twitchy from the stress of filling her position to the point he looks like he's constantly ODed on caffeine
Sasha gets back in the office and when everyone learns they can't quit or be fired Jon makes it his personal mission to be as much of a menace to Elias as possible
but he'd never do that to Sasha, she gets doodles of her hanging out with Cecil from Nightvale because she's a good boss:)
Martin scolds Tim for how he's been treating Jon and Sasha because of the changes caused by first and secondhand paranormal bullshit exposure
Jon gets to go out for drinks with people who actually like him
Everyone learns why Jon has a shirt that says "the difference between me and Superman is Superman has Super Vision, I need constant supervision
A discussion about who takes Jon home with them is had because at some point the poor goober lost his shoes and started trying to wrap around Martin like a belt
Sasha gets kidnapped on her way home
Michael helps her because some part remembers being an archival assistant and she's treated hers so much better than Gertrude did
Helen doesn't take Michael's place but the door still rejects him and the corridor collapses as both Sasha and Michael crash into Jon's new flat
Michael is freed but is in such bad shape he needs to be in the hospital for several weeks on recovery
Things attempt to be normal
Tim and Jon are menaces to Elias in very different ways
Jon doesn't want anyone traveling alone
Elias doesn't care but can't STAND the idea of Jon being there without a buffer so Sasha gets to have company on her trip, Tim goes to India and gets the ghost bullet, cue Mystery Mousketool meme
Martin, Basira and Daisy are handling the workload as best they can but since none of them are particularly suited to the task things go badly because Martin is terrible at direct leadership
When Sasha and Jon get kidnapped by Trevor and Julia, Sasha decides that the best way to clear some of the air is through lore dumping her backstory (still to be determined)
Jon is deemed suspicious by the false cop cause he does NOT look sober
Insert attempted police brutality interrupted by a shotgun
While the false cop is regenerating Jon gets the "how did you two meet" Statement from Julia
They get to the cabin and Jon freaks out a little at the idea of reading ANOTHER cursed book
Big relief when nobody gets eaten this time
Nobody ever believes him but Jon has kept every promise he's made (not that he's made many before but it's the principle of it)
Yoinks the page
Our duo finishes the assignment
Back home
Sasha learns about the storage unit
JON STOP REACHING FOR THE EXPLOSIVES YOU ABSOLUTE GREMLIN
Tim is EXTRA motivated to wreck shop at the Unknowing
Jon and Martin stay behind to be distractions
Big boom happens, Tim makes it out because the guy's literally too angry to die, Sasha is in the coma, Daisy is in the Coffin and Basira is just having a time of it
Jon gets mind fondled by Elias and it makes Martin want to rip the bastard's throat out but the best he can do is have the cops rough him up as much as possible
Jon is temporary head of the Archives and the pressure swallows him whole and he crashes like a meteorite because he desperately doesn't want to be the one giving orders
Martin's "assistance" has been leaving cobwebs in places nobody checks
And thus we enter season 4
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lemotmo · 2 days ago
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I’m honestly really worried right now with how nasty this has all gotten so fast.
I feel so bad for Oliver. His entire storyline he’s waited years to tell has now completely been hijacked from start to finish thanks to Lou and his cult.
The disgusting things being said about Oliver. About Ryan. The show itself. All with Lou liking and engaging with them playing up the poor me card with them.
Like they are literally demanding Oliver be written off the show as punishment and any future Buck scenes they already filmed scrubbed out. I saw a few say deport Ryan back to Mexico and then write Eddie off by sending him to Texas permanently and send Buck with him. Some saying Lou should have been kept on and Oliver let go.
Like it’s all insane. And none of them deserve it because they didn’t do anything wrong. No one misled or promised or lied. They have been open and transparent about BT from the start. Tim literally said at the very beginning this was an entry level relationship. No wedding bells.
I’m also getting worried the network is going to pull the plug on buddie because even if it’s not us doing it, they might not wanna deal with the insane blowback these people are causing and will cause when buddie happens.
Don't worry Nonny. Like I said before, Oliver will be fine. Ryan will be fine.
Oliver has disabled comments on his post on Instagram because he knew exactly what was coming. They are both probably avoiding social media right now, but I'm also certain they'll be back as soon as the worst is over.
The show never made any promises about BT. On the contrary, they made it very clear, since day one, that Tommy was there to be a plot device. Eddie was all over the BT narrative in both seasons. In season 8 BT were still in the same place they ended in season 7. There was no growth whatsoever. Also, there was no buildup at all for them. Tommy just existed next to Buck in episode 5, but there wasn't one single sign of physical affection. Even in episode 6 there was only a cheek kiss. It reminded me of Eddie kissing Ana when he returned home after the shooting. A single cheek kiss. We all know how that relationship ended.
I wouldn't worry too much about the network. It seems bad right now, because they are all being loud and obnoxious, but the BT fandom is actually quite small compared to the Buddie fandom and the general 911 fandom. Their voices will be drowned out by all the positivity in the end. These BT stans will stop watching the show, but it won't even make a dent in the ratings. There's only a few hundred of them.
I checked Instagram and I've already seen so many positive comments, saying it was one of the best episodes of season 8, praising all the actors and crew for their hard work.
So don't worry. ABC knows exactly what Buddie could mean for the show. It would most definitely increase the popularity. Bi Buck already brought in a lot of people (some of them who have already left us again since Thursday evening), but a lot of them are here for the bi representation and they are here to stay.
So imagine how crazy things would get if Eddie would turn out to be not so straight after all and very much in love with his best friend? And Buck finally figuring out who he really wants?
The episodes leading up to them finally getting together would draw in so many new people who heard that those two 'gay firefighters from 911' are finally getting together after 7 loooong seasons.
ABC doesn't care about a few hundred people throwing a tantrum under a social media post. They do care for ratings and making a profit. That's it.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Tell you one thing though: After what he has done? Lou will never ever work on anything for ABC again, which means that we won't ever see him back on 911 and that's a beautiful thing. 😏😆
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youmakethelight · 2 days ago
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I felt every word of this in my soul. Shalaka always has the best and most thoughtful takes.
I really want to talk about the ash and carol scene where ash shouts at her. And I really want to thank Shalaka for speaking about this bc it helped me understand why I felt so uneasy about it and why I've been dreading rewatching it.
(To clarify, I have absolutely no complaints about Manish Dayal or Melissa McBride. I think they are both incredible actors, and I think they absolutely smashed their performances. My issue here is with the showrunner and the writing.)
Before I watched it myself, all I heard people say about this scene was how nice it is that Carol told the truth to Ash, and how nice it is that Daryl told her to tell him..
Well, when I watched it myself, when Ash started shouting - I wasn't okay. Carol's reaction made me feel uncomfortable in ways I really didn't understand. To be honest, I sort of zoned out while it was happening because it felt so unsettling to me. I guess my fight or flight reaction was freeze.
And I realise now that it felt so unsettling because I've spent years with Carol, knowing that she has a history of abuse, but being able to feel how far she's come. It felt like armour to know that in spite of having that history inside of her, she's built layers that feel powerful and strong in the best way.
This scene felt like it stripped and peeled all of that back, and she was raw. It hurt. But the thing is, it hurt because it felt like the men creating the show were making this happen to her. And for what payoff? For that reason, it felt humiliating actually. It felt like disrespect. And actually, it felt like men behind the camera getting to feel gratified at seeing a woman "brought down a peg or two". These are the feelings I felt, even though I couldn't articulate why it felt that way. But it did feel that way.
As for Ash shouting as he did, this shocked me. Although this is a zombie horror show, it genuinely felt more scary to me that such a kind man, who I'd spent all this time beginning to trust, reacted in such a volatile way. It reminded me of how someone you trust to never hurt you just might.
Although his words were hurtful, I could barely hear them, because I was too preoccupied by how much the shouting put me in my fight or flight (or freeze) mode. For me, without doubt, the words would have had more emotional impact without the shouting. And honestly, it just seemed out of nowhere. It seemed out of character for Ash, excessive, and there was nothing in the script that helped me understand a reason for why he reacted quite so violently. And then we just move on as if it was okay.
What did the re-creation of carol's domestic abuse even achieve? Was the showrunner just saying "see, look, I did watch parts of your stupid show, I know about the abuse, I can show you I know". It felt gratuitous because it didn't seem to achieve anything.
In "Look at the Flowers" in season 10, when carol hallucinated alpha and she hurled verbal insults at carol, we saw a glimpse of how carol's history of abuse affects her. I found that to be much more of a sensitive exploration of this topic. Within that scene, carol was given space to respond in a way that didn't regress her. It felt more like getting to learn a bit more about her and how it feels to be inside her head.
My takeaway is that men like david zabel should not be allowed to write stories about women who have been abused.
Nine Lives Two Mics (Caryl Podcast) | New Episode
🎙️Deep Dive into 204 & 205 of #TheBookofCarol🎙️
A comprehensive review of Daryl & Carol’s arc in episodes 4 & 5 of The Book of Carol.
Spotify | Youtube
youtube
This podcast was recorded before the new teaser was released, and David Zabel decided to share his "vision" again. The next podcast episode will cover all of the above and a breakdown of some of the most talked-about scenes from the TBOC finale. Keep an eye out for updates.
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gayofthefae · 3 months ago
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They've said they want their show rewatchable. As someone who wasn't like SUPER invested in the ships/show before, the most rewatchable thing they can do is Mike's queerness.
I would not have rewatched it until season 5 came out. Maybe once before then if I got bored, but definitely not as much as I have without it. And the plots for Will have been too supernatural focused (also a good rewatch point after season 5 comes out, I'm sure) to be worth rewatching for his queer personal plot for two seasons before we even really get to it too much.
But Mike? Everything Mike does is impacted by his queerness. Will? Obviously. El? Most DEFINITELY. The Supernatural? You mean the thing that only ever affects Will and El? Yup.
Do you know my first thought, as someone not yet obsessed, when it started to become more clear that Mike was queer? "Oh, that's more interesting"
The average person isn't gonna drop the show because their ship broke up amicably. But they are going to if they get bored.
Mike having been queer the entire time, who cares if planned, as long as it isn't contradicted by anything prior (which is not possible because queerness is not disprovable) just gives a whole new view to everything he's ever done, making it less straightforward than you thought it was, changing your original view of the events, making you want to rewatch just to see how each moment is impact.
Making it more INTERESTING.
It's simple, honestly. Speaking as someone who passively thought the couples were cute and generally wanted the characters to be happy but wasn't deeply attached or fixating on any part of the show, Mike being queer is just more interesting than him being straight. That's all the people really want.
They've already gotten lots more residuals from this. And I'm sure they know that at least half of it isn't just because of the vol 2 lore drop. And it isn't because of what we think is gonna happen for Will in season 5 either, why watch seasons where it also hasn't happened yet. It's because of something else, much like the lore, that affects every facet of an entire plotline from the first episode. Not even the lore actually does that, it's just interesting to know, but that one's easier to connect back in your memory, but isn't as deeply rooted that you need to think through every singular behavior of the mind flayer. But with Mike, we know it affects it, but we immediately had to know how.
I probably would have rewatched it once by now. Maybe one more time a year from now to prepare for the season 5 release, but maybe not. I didn't do my rewatch before season 4's release, so I might not have. But instead, because of Mike and Mike only, I'm currently on my third watch since 2022. Maybe fourth, I'm not sure. Not just because of a ship I wanna see again because they're cute. Because I'm LEARNING something new every time I see his face on my screen. Not because I ship it, not even because I personally want it to be true for any character's sake.
But because Mike being queer is just. more. interesting.
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estebunny · 9 months ago
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esteban ocon in the garage before free practice 1 of bahrain gp
via alpine instagram stories
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hella1975 · 10 months ago
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just think this time tomorrow ill be publicly indecent in a spoons somewhere. i am so strong
#ONE MORE EXAM. WE CAN DO THIS. I WILL BE DONE IN LITERALLY LESS THAN 24 HOURS NOW#AND THEN THE NEXT EXAM SEASON ISNT UNTIL MAY. COME ON GIRL#we have such a fun plan for tomorrow though bc the consensus has just been 'we need to get fucking mangled after this exam'#like i havent been out-out in WEEKS the closest i came was the end of december for a hometown house party of all things#i didnt even go out for nye. let's all take a moment and consider the implications for someone like me NOT GOING OUT ON NYE#so i am OVERDUE a good night out and then on top of that ive had exams be SO fr#and also this is the first year where my main friendship group (i.e not my housemates but my actual social circle)#are ALL econ students like there's about five of us and we all do econ and yeah two of them ive been mates with since first year#(the girl is my best mate at uni and is always who im on about if i talk about a 'girl on my course' and the lad is the one i lived with#in first year and have kind of got a thing with now?) BUT THE OTHERS ARE NEW ADDITIONS AND THAT'S SO FUN#so we're ALL gonna tip out of that exam and then me and her are gonna go back to mine to get ready bc am i fuck doing make-up#before that exam. the STATES i have shown up in these past few days i think the invigilators are worried about me#and then we're meeting the lads at the pub and starting there and THEN going spoons bc it's me and the girl's tradition#(calling her just 'the girl' is so funny. woman 🫵) after exams to buy each other mystery shots at spoons and we HAVE to drink them#and then one of the lads really wants to go to a karaoke bar for some reason?? so that might be in my future#AND THEN we're going clubbing. im so ready. take me home vodka shots. the end is near please please please#hella goes to uni
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orcelito · 10 months ago
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I always get so angry but then I play video games and I'm no longer so angry
This is a problem when it comes to wanting to leave my shit ass job
#speculation nation#i was absolutely ranting with my coworker about this shit#if either of us leave we're both going. straight up.#boss was threatening to fire them and im like. if he does? im quitting on the fucking spot.#i dont have a job lined up yet but im gonna start seriously looking#and if it comes down to it i dont think itll take too long for me to find Something. not with my qualifications.#might not be the best paying job right away but so long as i have Something & it doesnt make me utterly miserable#itd still be better than this fucking shithole.#i used to love this place but everything has soured because of him.#ive toughed it out for Far too fucking long. and ive finally reached the end of my Fucking Rope.#8 years total of my life ive given to this store. but no more.#it's not a matter of 'if'. it's a matter of 'when'.#and once we leave at least 2 of the other seasoned employees will be leaving.#4 out of 6 of the fully trained drink makers. gone.#and the other 2 are leaving at the end of this semester Anyways.#so what are ya gonna do Boss Man? if our labor has really been that worthless to you then surely this will be no big deal!#right? right? right? from how youve treated us it's clear! it's clear you take us for granted and dont give a shit about us as people.#so youre gonna get a rude fucking awakening Very soon. have fun cleaning up the wreckage of your mockery of our lives.#anyways hi yeah shit's about to blow up at work and im jumping ship as soon as i can make it work#i also got caught in freezing rain and had to walk home (took an hour of walking when itd usually take 25 mins!) bc i Could Not Bike#may or may not have to go into work tomorrow and if i do i may just take a hammer to those fucking windows [joke][this is a joke]#its gonna ice all night and i voiced these legitimate concerns for my safety and got told#'well we'll follow what the city standards are' or whatever the fuck. and got told to take the bus.#WELL COME ON SHITSTAIN I STILL HAVE TO WALK TO THE BUS STOP NOW DONT I??????#plus i just dont like the idea of going out rn at all. it's so dangerous. im for serious Everything is ice.#even on a salted road my bike still slid out from under me. i Had to walk it home#walking very very carefully with very ginger steps. lord help me on any inclines bc gravity was pushing me Down.#it was awful. one of the worst commutes of my life. and this fucker has the audacity to tell me to just Take The Bus?#hes getting on my last Fucking nerves. oh yeah and him completely dismissing my coworker's concerns about passive aggression#ran out of tags (lmfao) so ill stop ranting here. but just. i am so Fucking done with him.
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jamietxrtt · 2 years ago
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1x09 all apologies is the best episode of the show actually
#particularly because of the way it focuses on ted and roy’s relationship#i LOVEEE their relationship in this episode#how ted refuses to get angry at roy even when roy wants him to#and promises his support and roy BELIEVES HIM AND TRUSTS HIM AND ACCEPTS IT#and the way roy gets angry at ted but then comes back calmer and apologizes#that very frank conversation they have in ted’s flat where they might disagree but they’re trying to make this#as easy as possible on each other#and then the end when ROY STOPS TO TOUCH THE BELIEVE SIGN AHHHH MY HEART#i just love how they may not always agree or see eye to eye#but regardless they’re always trying to do right by each other#and they’re both able to give and recieve support from each other#its a very affectionate kind of respect#i like you and i want whats best for you and im gonna try to make it happen in any way i can#despite the circumstances we face and the disagreements we might have#i just. love their friendship#part of why it bothers me so much that roy is suddenly so distant at the start of s2 :(#i kinda feel like they hit him with the reset button between seasons#like he spent s1 learning how to be part of a community and trust ppl#and stop being such a lone wolf#and learning to love ted#and it all pays off!!!#then s2 starts and suddenly he hasnt spoken to ted in months. hasnt been back to the team or anywhere near football in months#back to his lone wolf ‘i dont need friends im better than that’ ways#and he has to kinda relearn in s2 why he likes being a part of that community#and both helping guide but also accepting guidance himself#which like. i know its in some ways realistic that he’d backslide in that regard#especially when going through something so tumultuous as losing his career#but i dont find it super narratively satisfying to watch him go through basically the exact same arc again 2 inches to the left#anyway im very excited where he’ll go in s3 now that he loves the team and ted again! i hope they dont hit him with another reset button#all that is to say yes i love ted and roy’s friendship and mutual affection and respect and i hope we get to see more of it in s3
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gatun-gatunesco · 1 year ago
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Fleabag
"it will pass... i love you, too... ok"
#personal post#then again i forced myself through finishing Fleabag season 2. Less painful than the first one with my sex repulsion.#yet. more hurting in the deep and bigger skeme of things. mostly about love and how hard it is#she of course is a constant reminding of them. about they struggles. they problems. they caos and drama they life is#i resonate. of course. with the Priest (with a mix up of Harry still) and it hurts#same as the first one; the last episode is packed with a explosion of events that could be seen little in comparison of the first season#but the pain is more deep. less inmediate. as we practically knew. since the start. that was going to end bad for her but not like that#similar to them and me. we reach the same conclusion. basically#i still have things to say. and in order to not let it root and melt my insides i am speaking them up#some of them here. some of them in a personal way.#i want this pain. this confusion. this feelings that i can not control. this desperation. this burning heart. this remindful mind#this HHHHHHHHHHH... this love to pass#and with that. one day. we might be friends. we might be in each other life without hurting the other. we might be able to talk and have fu#we might be happy to see the other happy once again. even if not together anymore. and that will be alright#i have hope. we are weird afterall. for once i do not want to be right and that we can. in fact be friends even after all our history#but if this is the total end. the need for us to cut all connection. that would be fine too. probably for the best of us#i just. want to have hope for a better future for now. let me have that at least#vent post#tw vent
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1980ssunflower · 2 years ago
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bwahh miss eddie tbh
#f/o:🔥jump in the fire🤘#tape entry circa 1980#id like to draw stuff of us together again but DRAWING kinda sucks tbh hfdsjk#idk was thinking abt eddie convincing me to play dnd w him and him making me a tee that says 'babies first dnd session' on it HFDJSK#was thinking a bit on our lore too#i havent thought on it very hard or anything but the gist of it i decided on since like i first started liking eddie was like#we were childhood friends but i kinda abandoned him for popularity but we're not like enemies now we're just distant#in season 1+2 my s/i has a more posh look to him to fit in w the popular crowd w like hints of his actual style#(which is just my irl hair metal look // which my parents just said recently they thought my eddie keychain was supposed to be me lol)#post highschool he starts leaning more into that style and is more himself!#hes best friends w steve and works w him and robin at scoops ahooy + the video rental place too#in terms of show accuracy i guess he'd only start getting close to eddie again during season 4#and 1000% that motherfucker isnt dying cause i will SAVE HIM#ALSO my s/i uses my irl guitar which is a black les paul w the fret inlays being bats!#so because of that tbh i think eddie got his tattoo to match w me 👍#(since i have the same tattoo lol)#oh and liike i might as well sayy#fairly recently i dreamt of eddie again but didnt want to say anything w how very romantic it was#its funny that every time eddie is in my dreams its always romantic#but we got away from the group to explore something we saw in the distance#and i just remember linking pinkies together and eventually holding hands and how my heart fluttered from that especially#idk why hand holding feels so special w us#but you know whats INSANE#i KISSED him we KISSED#i have NEVER kissed any f/o EVER in my dreams and EDDIE had to fucking be my first f/o dream kiss INSTEAD OF MY HUSBANDS GHDFSJK#UNIVERSEEE IVE BEEN W MY HUSBANDS FOR YEARS NOW CANT YOU PLEASE LET ME KISS THEM FOR THE LOVE OF GODDD HDFSJKL
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caffeinated-bibliophile · 1 year ago
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I'm still crying 😠
#this is the kind of blow that would have made me actively suicidal a few years ago and yes i realize how stupid that is#as things are now... I'm not coping *well* but I'm managing to hold onto anger so the depression doesn't totally take over#but i can not stop crying#every time i think I'm finally done it starts up again#this has also pushed my anxiety to the point where i feel like I'm going to pass out throw up or both and i can't stop shaking#audiobooks with my noise canceling headphones were my best/only semi-effective tool for dealing with anxiety#and yes i know. reading is a privilege and i should just be grateful that books are available in my country & that we have libraries at all#this year has been one thing after another and even small things like this pile up and eventually become overwhelming#and this happening as my seasonal depression is really ramping up was just the fucking cherry on top i guess#i almost just. deleted this blog lmao. what's the point of having a book blog when i can't really read right?#but i keep telling myself nothing lasts forever and i will regret it if i throw away an 8 year old side blog#but even looking at books is making me feel even more nauseous and shaky right now#so i might be on hiatus after my queue runs out idk#depends on how long this churning pit of despair lasts i guess#and also. this happened at a holiday weekend all i can't even make a 1-2 hour drive to a library to renew or get a new card#because libraries around here close between 4 & 6PM most days and i can't get to one after my partner gets home from work before they close#everything about this situation is like. worst timing.
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