#we didn’t see his body
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THE BAD BATCH SPOILERS!!!!
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#istg he can’t be gone#I refuse to believe it#through many rounds of tears I’ve convinced myself it’s possible he’s alive#we didn’t see his body#yeah his goggles were found but he could’ve been captured#or he escaped#or they fell off during the fall and landed somewhere else#the others survived a similar fall#AND THEY CANT END THE PHEE X TECH ARC LIKE THIS#😭😭😭😭#and besides……it’s Star Wars. no one stays dead.#I’m going to go cry over past episodes and pretend he’s still fine#also sorry for the meme it’s all I can do 😭😭#the bad batch#star wars#star wars the bad batch#tech#the bad batch tech#the bad batch omega#the bad batch echo#the bad batch crosshair#the bad batch wrecker#the bad batch hunter#tech the bad batch#star wars tbb#tbb tech#tbb spoilers
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heres an old comic i semi abandoned bc i got frustrated on, but the idea was what if mesothulas, freak that he is, modeled ostaros’s face after prowl. since he is the muse. and also the horrors of fatherhood and seeing yourself, a terrible person, onto ur weird son who literally is the most innocent being ever since he has no conscience yet to do right or wrong.
for the missing dialogue imagine mesothulas gushing over his baby and prowl going huh this guys weird af.
#drawing mesothulas is what soured my efforts#him and the dialogue#impactor goes into the lab and almost shits himself when he sees prowls face on some weird body#ostaros has his distinct uncanny valley shit that doesn’t make him look like a cold con with prowls face#it’s literally just prowls face#mesothulas is as much an artist as he is a scientist#when prowl hands him over to kup he remodels ostaros face into the springer we know and love#but theres still something that didn’t get completely erased#so springer still ends up having people tell him he looks like prowl#it scares them#he absolutely hates it they’re indirectly calling him ugly#transformers#hermes art#maccadam#prowl#ostaros#springer#mesothulas#sins of the wreckers#transformers idw
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Monster Hunter AU where Felix gets sent to a sketchy part of town where a bloody butcher lives and stumbles upon Vampire! Oliver being unapologetically his weird ass self. Dressing in leather and leaving body parts lying around and Felix should probably get rid of him but Ollie might be trying a little too hard to get Felix to just come inside his lil house to a looky loo (and it works cuz Felix goes dick first, questions second)
Someone to tell me to shut the fuck up actually i cant do this anymore
#why are we not talking about the casual dead body in the corner#barry literally looks like someone just walked in on him making his morning cuppa#‘oh officer i didn’t see you there’#felix would fall for it#those baby blues are some kind of magic truly#cattonquick#daff writes#oliver quick#felix catton
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Yuma Month: Day 10: Memories
…but there were none to think of…
#Yuma Month 2024#rain code#master detective archives: rain code#yuma kokohead#pixeldoodles#my art#what memories? they gone.#I didn’t know what to do with this one#so I drew Yuma going through some existential dread#because who doesn’t like seeing him freak out right?#I remember when he first heard shinigami’s voice#he was so scared that he hugged his whole body#ugh thats so good… 👌#I wanted to draw him in that pose#its so mentally whumpy I love it#I bet shinigami relished in the one he once was having his tail between his legs upon first waking up.#didn’t we all lol#anyway yeah just a quickie#making yuma suffer in another way I guess haha XD#never ask me to draw his light up shoes again
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I kind of can’t comprehend whatever happened to Isha and Vander like my brain is just processing it as there was a bright flash of light and that’s it. When it sinks in I’m gonna lose my shit.
#it’s 3am and I’m so dehydrated so that’s not helping#I can’t accept what happened to viktor either I’m convincing myself he’ll come back somehow because like. what do you mean. what do you mean#his best friend killed him. what do you mean he died. no he didn’t#when we see isha and vander’s bodies I’m going to be an absolute wreck wtf#arcane#arcane spoilers
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not to be bitter about the Durins again but it will never stop pissing me off to a burning degree that in the movies Kíli dies off in a little corner with no one but one elf he met two days ago around, and she’s nerfed to the point she’s utterly helpless until RIGHT AFTER he’s killed. It feels so bullshit and unfulfilling. I remember me and a friend were huge fans of the Durins (her even more than me) as well as the little Kíli and Tauriel side story back when the movies came out, and we watched it in theatres and she literally said she would never watch that scene again bc it disappointed her so badly. She skips it to this day. Bc why the fuck did they have Kíli die for an elf he barely knew (I like Tauriel but it is true— they’ve known each other for maybe two or three days total) over the family he ran out into battle to defend, the family he set out on the quest with and the family that he was so proud of. Why was he not with his brother, or trying to defend his uncle who was still very much alive and in danger? Tauriel literally just serves to get Kíli killed in that scene, bc they nerf her (CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD. Even against a tough orc she should be holding her own) but have Legolas out there holding his own, and it is nowhere NEAR as emotionally devestating as the single sentence we’re given in the book of how Kíli and Fíli went down defending their uncle. I can almost excuse the change in how Fíli dies bc it does hold emotional weight, but Kíli’s death going from the devotion of family even to his own doom into dying for an elf he has puppy love for while being totally cut off from the other dwarves fucking killed the scene for me. And there isn’t really even a good payoff for Tauriel afterward either. We just leave her there regretting she ever loved him. It hurts me so damn much, and not least of which is because for every video someone does as a tribute to Thorin and his nephews, it always takes a sharp left turn into Tauriel watching Kíli die all by himself and it doesn’t even feel related to the other’s deaths. I think it would have felt much more like the best of both if they’d kept Kíli dying defending his family, and then have Tauriel come to him as he’s dying. But that’s not what happened. It fucking sucks. I promise I do like the movies but I will stand hard by saying that it’s weakest writing is the latter half of the second and the former half of the third movie. It only really picks up to consistently good scenes at Thorin’s battle with Azog in my opinion. Sorry for another brief hater moment but man. Man.
#lotr#the hobbit#sons of durin#thorin oakenshield#kili#fili#kili and fili#(their last name isn’t Durin but I’m tempted to tag it as such since I see a lot of people use that.#though to be fair what other character is named Kíli or Fíli out there lmao)#I fucking LIKE TAURIEL. but she is not more important than his family. like she is a crush he has but UR BROTHER JUST DIED MAN.#UR UNCLE IS ABOUT TO. IM SORRY BUT TAURIEL SHOULD BE ABLE TO HANDLE HERSELF AGAINST A SINGLE GODDAMN ORC.#ISNT SHE A GENERAL??#PLEASE. it hurts so bad. and they have the GALL to remind us abt Dís w the stone afterward. like family was at all involved#in how Kíli died beyond what sent him up the stairs. I don’t even think his last thoughts were portrayed as his family in the movie.#it looks like all he’s thinking about is Tauriel. not the fact that his mother will never see him again. not that he failed his uncle.#not even that he didn’t get to avenge his brother.#then Thranduil comes in and it feels awful bc she doesn’t seem to get any payoff for her character.#and this is a personal nitpick but the dialogue there just. it doesn’t end satisfyingly.#the ‘because it was real’ like never felt impactful to me. it actually felt kind of cheesy?? Tauriel’s lines actually have weight to them#and then Legolas movie bombs that scene too and we just. forget about Tauriel over there VERY LIKELY dying from elven grief#’go talk to the 12 year old in the north. for some reason he’s already called Strider’#and Kíli’s body is RIGHT THERE. they’re doing nostalgia bait and MCU level ‘ohh this guy’ shit RIGHT AFTER THE DURIN’S DIE
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i need to remake my cup bros ref… both cup and human designs… it’s been almost a year(?) and i’ve developed the headcanons and i would like to share with the class!!! (i wrote thirty tags. Please help me)
#my little hc i kinda showed in the refs but didn’t point out: cuphead’s handle appears broken/in human form his ear is halved#cause he has microtia (that also affects the eustachiantube/middle ear). basically i am a HoH cuphead truther#also to add onto that i think he has poor auditory processing issues cause i also see him as AuDHD#double also. while he would use ASL on a bad hearing day i think regularly he also uses home signs to express words/concepts#autism-related btw. it’s actually a bit visible in insert cuphead media (to me at least LOL) that cuphead expresses a lot of body language#so not liking conversation oral or signed as well as replacing oral words w home signs is in character. at least to my headcanon whatever#floats your boat!#OH! plus his split upper lip that i draw him with isn’t related to the microtia. he just roughhouses and chipped/tore his lip open when he#was younger#cuphead is also a trans boy. it feels right to me LOL#even back in 2017 when i barely knew the game or also much about trans people i saw cuphead and was like hm. hm!#tbh he just pawned his clothes onto mugman. who i’ve also changed my hc for i see him more as bigender than a cis boy now#LOL. i cast bi on mugman. sorry buddy#OH HIM TOO. im so sorry mugsy i have like two headcanons for you 😭😭😭#she uses he/she 2 me. i like casting personal parts of myself onto mugman even if i gravitate more towards cuphead/chalice#i see him as a bi ace as well. and a hopeless romantic. i don’t ship uhh i don’t remember what it’s called#i don’t ship cala maria X mugman (respect though) cause i see the cups as kids and i’m also a hilda X maria shipper LOL#but in the show. i will be real that she is a hopeless romantic. Look at that dork#FORGOT TO MENTION. i am a cuphead aroace truther to my grave. KEEP THAT MUSHY ROMANCE OUT OF MY HIGH SEAS ADVENTURE!!!!#like i said w cuphead before mugman is AuDHD (they share. many genes LMFAO)#however the difference is that they express it in different ways; while cuphead’s is more linked to his hearing/social behavior#mugman’s is more related to her emotions. i see it through my headcanon colored glasses that especially in the show mugman has more#meltdowns between the two cups#he has high emotional sensitivity both in positive and negative ways; former as in being strongly attached to cuphead and latter as in#more prone to meltdowns as well as being very literal#which isn’t a bad thing of course. mugman we are shaking hands so hard we are the same#OK that’s all the ones i want to share right now. i also haven’t shared her human or cup design i did but i’m workshopping chalice!!!!!!#i am leaving her out intentionally she deserves her own post because i luv her so much#ok post over. twenty minutes dedicated to autism about the twins out of the trio#cuphead
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No but even if the Byers had a guest room in California, they still had two guests that evening spending the night…
MURRAY AND MIKE ONE ON ONE CONTENT AND WE MISSED IT?!?!
#stranger things#byler#stranger things 4#‘murray is mikes dad’ truthers are fuming for missing that content I know it#or maybe one of them slept on the couch?#I’m guessing Murray bc they didn’t plan for him to stay originally#but maybe not idk what the etiquette for guests was back then#one way I look at it is that mike is younger and so some ppl would say he gets the couch bc his body can handle it#whereas anyone over 40 is going to get their ass kicked sleeping on a couch#tbh they barely know each other so I think it would be weird for them to share a room#but again idk what guest etiquette was back then#I know some ppl see it as unsophisticated to expect a guest to sleep out in the open w/out privacy#that’s why it’s possible they had to bunk together#most likely with Murray getting the bed and Mike the floor#but then also in that case why not just have mike sleep on the floor in wills room?#that would make a lot more sense#regardless we were robbed of post risotto material
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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it#my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with#and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l#lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am#glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone#since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life#he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even#harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken#about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better#my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he#hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his#personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the#nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off#he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he#still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay#long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart#i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him
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I rlly hope this isn’t pointing to gojo ever coming back tho 💀
#like tbf nobara’s status was deliberately ambiguous so it made sense for her to be back#higuruma I also think his ‘death’ wasn’t shown super explicitly#like all dead characters have their whole bodies exploding or cut in half and we didn’t see that with him#so ok still reasonable imo#but gojo…..no#THAT would be an absolute asspull#jjk spoilers
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bro-ey mating rituals
#there is inherent romance. in recovering from ur lower body injuries. Together.#u would have to hold me at gunpoint to get me to draw a background with the way my procreate is lagging today#tyler is floating. like a cartoon character in love. it’s purposeful#holding onto his shoulder to laugh :3#see i finished it i colored it i didn’t lie#art stuff#tyler seguin#mason marchment#i love the way the coloring on their noses turned out#anyways i’ll shut up now. enjoy my sappy art.#get better soon#are we using 2791 is that what i saw. or 9127. i also like segment#tumblr compressing my art to shit. nature is dying.
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I think it’s so fun to see og son designs from people who aren’t in the fandom. Like all of a sudden Nick is fat and has no streak in his hair and this Terry is Filipino mixed and this Grant is a lanky black kid with an Afro and it’s like damn. We bred the diversity out of this ecosystem……
#all of this is so /pos and /lh#i think it’s facinating how fandom dictates these things#I do still see fat nick hcs which I love#hee a good boy#we need more body diversity#people left to their own brains for designs r so fun#wdym y’all didn’t steal gayblu3boi’s son designs#and just adapt his into ur own#insane impossible#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndads s1#dndads odyssey
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@bottomlessabyssposts @andiwriteordie @chiquitablanquita @givehimthemedicine @wibble-wobbegong
(if you have been tagged plz don’t feel obligated to respond! Hope you’re having a lovely day! Also if someone not-tagged sees this, feel free to chime in!)
Okay, so …hypothetically… if you were writing a fic about stranger things funerals (will, bob, barb, hopper, billy, eddie), do you think the Lab would’ve cremated Bob & Billy’s bodies in seasons 2 & 3, delayed the funerals to test them for Upsidedown diseases but ultimately released the real bodies (perhaps only in the case of Bob because he wasn’t the one possessed and Billy didn’t have a Joyce Byers fighting for him), altered their wills/autopsies to justify their cremations, recommended closed-casket funerals… or provided fake bodies?
Asking for a friend.
(I’m trying to decide from both a fic-writing perspective and a what-makes-sense-in-canon perspective. Like. We see a casket being buried at Barb’s funeral. Is that her body “just being released” (ie fake)… or is it a casket full of objects, bc the lab claimed they had to cremate/couldn’t release the body for safety reasons? I don’t think Mrs. Byers would stand for a fake Bob, & even if the lab is being cautious & doesn’t want to release the real body, they could lie to Bob’s parents about the cremation (ie Bob changed his will before he died). In Billy’s case… I think a fake body/closed casket is more likely, but then, they have the excuse of the mall fire. “It’s gotta be closed casket” they could say “i watched him die” Max could confirm, and no need to identify the body by the parents (we checked, Mr Hargrove, it’s true) but a recommendation for a closed-casket funeral or even cremation. & i honestly can’t decide… i want to be real to the show but I also want to make the kids look at fake (or real) dead bodies & be like… is it real or is it fake & talk about that added disbelief & uncertainty when it comes to death bc of their experiences. Like. It’s not real ‘til you see a body, and the body might be fake, etc, on top of the typical disbelief that comes when someone dies. …I think I kinda want Barb’s body to be fake, tbh. Like, even when “expose” the lab… the lab’s still controlling the narrative, still got the upper hand. Basically, i can’t decide, so like… thoughts?)
#stranger things#fic writing#i tagged these people bc parasocial bonds???#idk how to tumblr#hi mutuals!#hi wibble!#ik i keep tagging u in stuff lol srry#stranger things fic#basically i’m writing ab a bunch of the funerals we didn’t get to see & those we did & then elaborating#i’ve told some of you ab this lol#and i can’t decide#if i want a scene where mike stares at a body and wonders if it’s real#bob newby#barbra holland#billy hargrove#funerals#joyce byers#hawkins national laboratory#hawkins lab#hawkins#will i ever finish this?#fuck if i know#will i post it?#even more uncertain#but#here’s the thing#will byers#jim hopper#eddie munson#my posts
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my haaaaaands are still fucked uuuuuup but when they’re unfucked up i’m gonna draw smth so sexy and delicious for my new skyrim oc i can see the comp in my mind’s eye it’d just make my hands fall off if i tried to draw it
#he’s a liiiiiiitle bit of a serial killer so i’m envisioning him in like a white gown/robe with his hair up like in fucking. ella enchanted#in the garden with caryalind thallery but the knife behind his back is just coated in blood and there’s a pile of bodies behind him that we#can see but cary can’t see. i LOVE cary btw if you haven’t tried him as a follower highly highly recommend#vaynis is a character i didn’t think i’d get all that attached to i just wanted to try out the ancient falmer mod and then i got like. SO#attached to him immediately. he’s not actually an ancient falmer he’s just like. a non betrayed falmer who’s 23. his dad was like the#ultimate ‘i survive everything bc i’m good at hiding’ kinda guy who was a child when the snow prince died and he just fucked off into the#jerall mountains for forever basically. and another falmer (much younger) stumbled on him up there and was like ‘dude wtf if you have#immortality magic why do you live in a wizard shack in the mountains’ and he was like ‘well. i’m wicked scared all the time you see’#so in exchange for teaching her the immortality spell he was like ‘will you have a baby with me so the falmer don’t die out’ and she was#like ‘yeah ok but i’m not raising this fucking baby. i’m leaving i’m not a mom. you won’t make me a mom’ and he was like ‘yeah sure ok’#secretly thinking if he built her a tower she’d stay. so every day he’d build the tower bit by bit with magic and everyday she’d plan to#leave and like in a fairytale they had the ‘i’m going to leave’ ‘i know’ conversation but then vaynis was born and she actually DID leave bc#she wasn’t a mom! she told him that! but he was like shocked bc he was a moron. and so he locked vaynis in his wizard tower and only let him#out to teach him how to hunt and track and forage. and vaynis really wanted to see the world but his dad would never change. so he planned#to leave and he picked himself out a nice breton adventurer to seduce into taking him along only when his dad found out he killed the breton#and locked vaynis back in the tower. and vaynis waited and watched and planned and pretended like he was sorry. and then one day he#knifed him in his sleep. and took his shit and escaped. but auriel wasn’t super happy about that so he shipwrecked him. and ever since theb#vaynis has been pretty pathetic. he’s working on it but like. it really is kinda embarassing to watch. anyway his new scheme for glory is to#join the thalmor and he IS really pretty so this thalmor agent in solitude was like ‘hey the heir to the aldmeri dominion is also here and#we like. really need him back and with his head in the game. the nords are stupid they think you’re a altmer but like. i know a bitch whose#race is supposed to be extinct when i see one. you seduce caryalind thallery back into line and we’ll help you do whatever you wanna do to#restore the falmer. ideally it’s integrate with us.’ so vaynis obviously takes that fucking opportunity but problems arise bc caryalind#isn’t quite as seduceable as previously thought. yeah he’s flirty but he’s also looking for something serious and trying to become a better#person. so vaynis is on a journey of ‘get aldmeri prince to marry me and have his baby to achieve greatness’ when they stumble into helgen#after alduin attacks (bc as we all know i’m addicted to the ‘the prisoner dies and akatosh has to pick a new dragonborn’ narrative’ and he#) and akatosh picks vaynis honestly? to be funny. i love interpreting akatosh as a smartass it’s so funny to me#‘yeah there’s a whole world riding on this but like. wouldn’t it be kinda hilarious to see what happens?’#alternatively maybe akatosh and auriel are one in the same. you decide#anyway becoming the dragonborn really complicates this plan like. MOST severely
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i hate going “hey i might not be up to hanging out im just not doing well mentally” but also i know if im either constantly panicking or completely out of it while we’re hanging out then it won’t go well
#got into a fight with my mum because she was like ‘well why r u still scared when we’re not seeing massive waves and hospitals aren’t#overrun and this 80 year old family friend has had it three times and is fine every time#and do you look at what people who don’t have the same opinion of you are saying’#my response to this was ‘no I do look at the scientific articles that come out though and most of the ones about covid are finding it does#damage to multiple parts of the body’#like. i already have fibromyalgia. we’ve removed the cancerous tumor but i still have iodine radiation and have to hope the cancer cells#they found in my blood vessels didn’t go far enough to spread and if they did that the iodine destroys them#like. is a kid with fibromyalgia not enough. im not doing chemo so it’s fine right just get me sick#does she not fucking remember how it destroyed her husband. she watched it we all fucking watched for weeks as he withered away from this#fucking disease#and then everything we didn’t see we got in twice daily calls from the hospital as they told us how his kidneys failed and they were excited#when he could breathe on his side for two hours instead of just on his stomach and then it killed him#am i the only one in the household who remembers seeing my dad as a barely breathing corpse when we forced him to go to the hospital because#he couldn’t say three words or walk a few steps without panting like he’d just done a sprint#im tired of her making me feel crazy for not wanting this disease im not irrational or insane for this i promise i promise im not#im tired of her coming in 5 minutes after i leave an argument going ‘don’t be angry with me. it’s just that-‘ and then making my only safe#place in this house a part of the argument too#fuck it it’s fine I’m out in a few months anyway#vent tw#sittin g in a corner rn so that the only open space is in front of me and i can pull my legs up to my chest and my fan is on and my windows#are open and im tired of being called crazy and paranoid and irrational#covid tw
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Day whatever it is recap!
#📸#I think it’s day five maybe#also I’m at my brothers school for the last time ever :/#probs the last time I’ll ever step into a college dorm again tbh#and I got one last shower in the dorm bathroom which is always good bc if I’m seeing my brother chances are I’ve at very least spent three#hours in a car to get to him#so a shower is nice especially bc I was like panic attack sweaty. tmi? maybe.#I didn’t really do a lot today#at least not postable stuff#a lot of hanging out with family and Millie and being tired and kind of miserable but also daydreaming about any other shit in my life#idk. it all feels weird rn. all of it. and my brain is nagging me saying you’re being/doing x y z for attention even when I’m not telling#anyone shit im doing or thinking or anything and my brain is still like nah. you’re jealous of your brother graduating and not being home#at the end of dads life and at the same time you feel stressed and guilty and feel bad about him not getting closure#but at the same time you just wish you didn’t see his fucking body on the ventilator and all the IVs and the bloat and the popped blood#vessels and the nurses and doctors and knowing they did cpr so much if he even survived he would be miserable and have broken ribs#fuck. I want to be home and alone and crying about this all by myself alone. I hate this I hate this I hate this I want to go smoke a cig#but this is a no smoking campus ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh I am miserable and this is supposed to be this big fun#thing for my brother and I feel selfish and stupid for having feelings and letting myself get upset about my dad but my fucking mother#made some sign to put in an empty chair for my dad and she brought his jacket he wore all the time and I started crying when I saw and then#immediately after we had to go see his parents and my grandfather is falling apart and reminds me of my dad in the hospital and I’m just so#miserable and between horrible thoughts and self harm and everything I’m keeping to myself I am just thinking about how this is so bitter#sweet for my brother like he’s graduating with his friends and then moving away from them all to a place where it’s just all about dad being#dead and he doesn’t like Florida really and he’s gotta start his grown up life (technically he has two more classes online and he’s getting#a blank diploma tomorrow but yeah. things are rough and my body hurts and stress is so bad for me and my chronic pain and I feel like I went#from the most relaxed and comfortable and happy I’ve been in a year to feeling like hell on earth and I feel like I’m bringing down every#one else’s mood but like hello why are we pretending any of this normal thid can’t be real this can’t be real this can’t be real I don’t#want this to be reak I want it to be fake it has to be fake please please please wake up tomorrow and have it be a year ago please#I miss my father and I hate myself and violent thoughts are taking over my mind and I hate it all but things were so good literally up until#I saw my mom and grandparents#my brother was so nice when it was just us too (and later I just mean before mom got here specifically he was still nice to me)
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