#we HAD been considering buying it for a while now especially since its getting to the point a lot of newer titles are only released there

[haunted-xander]

The rebirth demo has me so hyped how DARE you make me wait until the end of the month for the full game

[amerricanartwork]

Hi! I just wondered if you've played Hollow Knight based off how much you like Rain World. I'd be interested in any thoughts you had on it. :)

Thanks for the ask! No, I have not yet played Hollow Knight, BUT my interest in the game has been piqued! However I still have to see if the gameplay itself seems up my alley, or get invested enough in the characters that I want to discover more than I've already found out (and I have spoiled quite a lot for myself) before I actually decide to buy the game.

Regardless, from what I do know it does seem like an interesting story, albeit one far more tragic than Rain World's in my opinion. The characters I've seen are also pretty cool, both in design and personality. In fact, it was some ship fanart I found a few weeks ago that got me interested in diving deeper into the game once I realized it was where the featured characters were from, especially since one of the characters I had remembered hearing about before.

Here's a little sketch of some characters I was thinking about and whom I've been meaning to draw for a bit! Hornet because she's very Shaped™, Quirrel because from what I've seen he's quite wholesome, and Tiso because he was the first character I heard about and I think he's kinda silly!

Also, some more comparing/contrasting thoughts about the game below:

Firstly, I like how the premise of Kollow Knight involves anthropomorphic insects! It's something I never realized until recently despite being aware of HK for at least a few years, but I usually tend to take interest in stories starring non-humanoid creatures, so it's a plus! I also enjoy the more gothic/Victorian-looking magical high fantasy aesthetic, though it's pretty different from Rain World, which I'd consider far more sci-fi and specbio-esque in its aesthetic.

Now to get into themes, so far Hollow Knight seems to share Rain World's theme of lost/dead civilizations, which is also a very interesting premise to me! However, HK seems to have a greater focus on interacting with the people of its dying civilization and as such you get far more definitive knowledge about what happened to cause it to collapse. The player character seems to take on more of a classic epic hero role, because from what I've heard about the lore and endings, they end up directly influencing the fate of Hallownest, even potentially destroying or defeating the force that caused its ruin. The visuals have this very dark, cool tint overall to sell that gloomy, mournful vibe, and the structures, while presumably old, are still mostly smooth, ornate, and not super deteriorated, with these castle or manor-like appearances more similar to real-life buildings or things in other high fantasy works. Then, the orchestral music I've heard alongside all of these elements really creates this impression in me that it's aesthetic and overall concept is more akin to a high fantasy epic tale, albeit a rather tragic one.

Meanwhile, Rain World seem to have the player take more of an anthropologist role, observing and trying to piece together the story of vast remnants of its dead civilization, which seem alien and impossibly complex because so much of the history they're from has been lost to time. One of the core themes is being very small compared to these long abandoned structures, to really sell the idea that this history is so much older and more intricate than you'll ever know. The colors of Rain World are often warmer, which can be associated with old things, and the structures are far more weathered and broken down, with the only living survivors of the people who made them being the iterators, whom we only get to hear directly from two of. Combined with the focus on simulating an ecosystem, the more directly religious ideas within, the themes of natural cycles and an entire civilization evolving, changing, and ultimately disappearing over deep time, and the overall alien, sci-fi industrial designs of the architexture and strange creature designs that look like things out of "Of Rust and Humus" or some other alien speculative biology worldbuilding project make RW fit well in with that genre of fiction in my opinion.

Sorry if I seem like I kinda took a sudden shift there, but I wanted to talk about this contrast in artistic aesthetics and story genres for a moment because the "lasting impression" an art piece creates something I've recently concluded is pretty important overall in works of art, at least for mine!

But anyway, I hope these thoughts were satisfying for now! Thanks again for the ask!

[maybecoffeemixed]

MAIN PLOT LINE OF DLC HAS BEEN FINISHED, SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT (long post, be warned)

7.8/10, kieran doesn't actually kill us.

Seriously though, I enjoyed it!! Since I don't actually own the game (we poor), I watched a no-commentary playthrough so there are plenty of things I very likely missed, including optional dialog, side-quests, and whatever that thing with the professors is (still lookin' for a video without some guy over it), so I can only comment on the bits I saw! That being said, here we go.

First of all, the BATTLES!! Despite not being able to play them myself, they looked SUPER fun!! I screamed when I saw Lacey's tailwind/lightscreen prankster whimsicott, and even MORE so when I saw it was sashed! I loved the usage of competitive items, and the fact that all their teams weren't completely mono-type, each having one exception to their type (Lacey's excadrill, Crispin's Exeggcutor, Amarys's Reuniclus, and Drayton's Sceptile) that they DIDN'T terrastalize was lovely touch!! Amarys's fight was super hype in particular, despite having an over 20 level advantage, the person I watched still nearly wiped to her! Her trick room AI does appear a bit goofy, but it's a small flaw. Finally, Kieran's battle... I personally adore a good rain team, but unfortunately Kieran's politoed was frozen at the start of the battle, and remained that way all the way til the end, so I can't honestly say how difficult it looked. The one thing I will say is that before the indigo disk was out, I created a hypothetical team for Kieran, and I CALLED that Grimmsnarl!! Literally even the focus sash. If anyone's curious, here was the hypothetical team I made. I'm a nuzlocker, not a competitive player, so it very well may be shit. Apologies in advance.

Next is the characters!! Every design slapped as always, and I enjoyed their personalities! Lacey was adorbs, Crispin was fun, and Amarys might just be one of my new favorites! As for Drayton? Let me tell you, I was side-eyeing him the whole time the MOMENT after he said THIS to Kieran.

After all the hype around dokutaro/peechikeen (now know as pecharunt, apparently), and all the speculation that Kieran would fall victim to its influence, him saying "that's just peachy" made my rat brain go into overdrive. In the end, I think it was just Legends Arceus giving me Volo flashbacks.

Now, the main event... KIERAN! Let me tell you, he gave me GOOSEBUMPS. Every time he appeared, I could feel a chill run up my spine, and his battle had my heart RACING. ESPECIALLY his breakdown at the end of it! One of the best times I've had in a good while. The animation, his reaction, all of it was GREAT!! It was so refreshing to see him not immediately heel-face turn.

Unfortunately, though, what happened after that all disappointed me. I admit I got too attached to the Dokutaro Posession theory, buy it was still disappointing for Dokutaro (I know that's not its name, leave me be) to not play any role in the main story. It felt like a natural conclusion to what the game was setting up, I thought he'd throw the master ball at terapagos, it'd fail, and he'd become so overwhelmed with everything that has happened that he'd succumb to Dokutaro's control and we'd have to fight the Dokutaro-Kieran with Terapagos's aid. That's not what happened, and I felt a bit sad. His recovery from his breakdown was still set up nicely and had some atleast sufficient justification, but it still felt like too-little too-soon. It felt more like he just gave up all together rather than defeated his demons. He'd never be as strong as the player, and that's that, which is a sour note to leave off on.

We see that he legitimately has nothing. All the other students left the MOMENT he was defeated. No one came to help the kid who was clearly having a panic attack. The BB league cares about him, sure, but I wouldn't consider them his friends. They all thought Kieran getting defeated would "fix" him, and even when he clearly wasn't any better after being defeated, they didn't do anything to assist him. Sure, sometimes when someone has climbed so high, you gotta let them fall, but once they do, you can't just leave them lying on the ground. You need to be there to lift them back up before they start digging.

This isn't an attack on the BB league at ALL. Like I said, I really enjoyed their characters! In fact, this reaction is part of the reason I like them so much. It adds depth.

I just wish that Kieran DID start digging, and that it led to something bigger. Even if Dokutaro wasn't involved, I atleast wanted the final battle with him to be that big thing, and not just a turtle that can't do anything but throw out weak earthpowers.

Though the biggest failing to me is that Kieran apologizes to us, but we don't apologize to him. We as in the player, and Carmine

Kieran's actions are his own and I'm not saying he shouldn't have apologized, but he wasn't solely culpable for how things turned out. We and Carmine purposefully lied, kept a secret that was dear to him, and were the straw that broke the camel's back. Even if we the player didn't apologize, Carmine should've!! Her treatment of Kieran heavily impacted him, and he mirrored her abuse (Kieran telling Carmine to "Shut it", just like she did to him, for example).

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, was in the wrong here. Kieran took things too far, Carmine behavior is a serious problem, and the played character was complicit.

I'm not demonizing anyone here, I am the number one Carmine defender after all, but everyone needs to take responsibility. Not. Just. Kieran.

I relate heavily to both Kitakami siblings, as both an elder sister with younger siblings who she's accidentally mistreated, and as a little sister with an older sibling who treats me like I'm lesser.

I've lashed out at my older sibling, and while my reaction wasn't proportional, it doesn't mean my emotions weren't justified.

I have severe genetic anger issues (that I'm now thankfully medicated for), and have unjustly taken them out on my younger siblings.

Carmine needs to apologize too, or the cycle will just continue. Maybe she already did and I missed it, or maybe it happens in the post-game. However, if she didn't? It makes me feel unresolved.

Anyways, that all I gotta say on it!! Hope someone enjoyed this overly long rambling!!

(P.S. I still don't trust dragon boy. "Thats just peachy" my ASS, you know something ya toothpaste haired cunt. Why did they request to bring ya along to area zero anyways, ya plot relevant FUCK.)

[matan4il]

Im currently doing a simple poll on my other account what Tumblr thinks of a Free Palestine and I say the results so far are a little concerning

And then two comments so far:

ardwolff: That's like saying we give a small chunk of land back to the indigenous American people and keep the rest for ourselves while we "live in peace" -- y'all do realize a Palestine historically was home to Jewish people and can be again if we abolish the Israel - backed apartheid ethnostate. No theocratic ethnostates should exist. They are inherently unjust

beigale-shtuchim: hey buddy what happened to the jewish population in MENA states?

Hi! First off, sorry that it took me so long to reply, I am getting so many asks, and I do not have as much time to reply as I would like, despite doing my best to find it... But I hope you know that I appreciate everything you do!

Thank you so much for doing this poll, and for sharing the temporary results. Do you have the final ones? If so, I hope you consider adding a link to them here.

There are different strategies researched in psychology about how to persuade people to come around to your position. It actually started out with marketing, but can be applied to any campaign aimed to get the public to subscribe to a specific position. One of them is the "foot in the door" strategy, a term that comes from those salespeople who show up on your doorstep, trying to sell you stuff you weren't even looking to buy. Their first challenge is how to keep you from slamming the door in their faces. If they right away offer you to buy something big and expensive, which you don't even need, you're likely to do exactly what they don't want. But if they get you to agree to something small, then they "got their foot in the door," you won't slam it in their faces 'coz you agreed to something small, and now they have you engaged. And the more engaged you are, the more invested you become. If you've already said yes to the small thing, you're now invested, and they can start talking you into why, if you're gonna buy this thing anyway, a bigger and more expensive version makes more sense.

The way it is defined here: "The foot-in-the-door technique (or FITD) is a strategy used to persuade people to agree to a particular action, based on the idea that if a respondent will comply with a small initial request then they will be more likely to agree to a later, more significant, request, which they would not have agreed to had they been asked it outright."

That's what the anti-Israel movement basically did. They started out with a smaller, more reasonable request, for people to care about the "Palestinian problem" (which means they were getting more and more people invested in it), and agree to a Palestinian state alongside a Jewish one. That wouldn't be as hard for people to agree to, especially since Jews themselves had agreed to that notion back in 1947, when they accepted the UN partition plan. Then, once people are invested in caring about the Palestinian problem, the discourse switched to how Israel has no right to exist as a Jewish state, and the only solution is to destroy it. Now all of a sudden, if you really care about Palestinians, then it's not enough to support a two state solution, you have to be against Israel, you have to be against Zionists, you have to be against the Jewish right to self-determination, anything less than that, and you are failing the Palestinians (who by now are depicted as the world's greatest victim, even though there is plenty of comparison data to refute that notion). And you do care about the Palestinians, right? So you gotta be against the Jews. Sorry, Zionists.

Also, I would love to hear what chunk of the land @ardwolff lives on they gave away to native people, while they're so willing to distort the history of Israel and erase the native rights of Jews here, making us the only native nation to have returned to its ancestral land, only to discover the world wants to displace it again. First it was done by the Romans 2,000 years ago through colonialism, now it's "in the name of" anti-colonialism (as its been packaged by your friendly FITD seller), but by punishing a native population, it's playing right into the hands of colonialists still...

I hope you're doing well! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[hxhhasmysoul]

idk what is with this fandom... the same people who hate sukuna and are oh so sad about gojou, also buy into what sukuna said to yuuji in this chapter... i guess maybe sukuna displayed gojou's level of comeback so they latched onto it. what can yuuji possibly do? how can sukuna be even defeated if gojou failed and kashimo failed.

since the beginning yuuji's shown superhuman physical abilities. plus amazing tactical sense and superhuman speed at which he learned things, especially all things jujutsu. but his most impressive and consistent ability has been his super reinforced soul capable of caging sukuna. and that soul did its job without him knowing how to influence it. now he's been given guidance. he also practiced by ingesting more cursed objects containing souls. he also showed that he can possibly soul swap.

also since the beginning sukuna has shown incredible superiority and detachment towards everyone. except for yuuji. he was ready to mock praise and tease everyone to get more entertaining fights out of them... except for yuuji. yuuji he bullies, diminishes him, tries to break yuuji's spirit. that smells like worry, maybe fear, definitely an attempt at psychological warfare. yuuji irks him, unsettles him.

jujutsu fights are about strength and cursed energy output etc, and so on, but they are also about compatibility as mentioned by gojou and nanami and mahito. also they are about planning and strategy. about understanding jujutsu and the soul, so yourself, your strengths and weaknesses. but also being able to understand your opponent as much as possible, their motivations, their behaviour, their techniques. this is why kenjaku and sukuna bested gojou because they both kept the fight on their own terms. kenjaku by not picking a physical fight at all and making it all about intrigue and cunning, sukuna by exactly tailoring his strategy to his opponent. this is also why gojou lost because even though he knew about the compatibility he didn't think that mattered in his case because he was him, he was gojou satoru, the strongest.

yuuji can win where those two lonely losers failed because:

a) he always performs best when he's fighting alongside others and he's not going in alone. being oriented towards others is the core of his character and it has always been like that. he's bested opponents stronger than him while learning and adjusting during the fight and the presence of others only spurns that on.

b) he's clearly going in with a plan, considering who he's going in with. and he mentioned before that he had a plan how to save megumi. he's been preparing for this. unlike some who decided to wing it...

c) he has a unique understanding of sukuna. and there's also been some hints that there's more to his connection to sukuna, some heian backstory. it's also possible that gojou was right and some of sukuna's technique rubbed off on yuuji, likely sukuna's true technique whatever that is. or at least yuuji has some understanding of it that he could use against sukuna.

d) there's something about yuuji that even sukuna senses and doesn't like. and one thing we can safely say about sukuna at this point, he's got expertise when it comes to these things.

e) yuuji was made specifically by kenjaku to imprison sukuna, and kenjaku is another expert in their field.

f) sukuna has ruined yuuji's life, has made yuuji question himself constantly, has given yuuji so much trauma and guilt, has taken so many people from yuuji. including megumi who yuuji might still hope to save. yuuji is uniquely biased against sukuna and uniquely motivated. gojou and kashimo had no emotional investment in sukuna apart from "senpai notice me i want to be one of the cool kids like you" and "senpai notice me i want to ride the belly mouth" respectively. yuuji has so fucking much more emotional investment. for him it's super personal on so many fucking levels.

this is why yuuji stands a chance against sukuna. this is why his win will never be an ass pull or main character magic. he's been meticulously built up as a character throughout the manga. if someone pays attention to the story, none of what i've written here is shocking to them.

[animekpopsimp]

A Fatal Decision (Kaeya and Diluc x sister reader part 4)

He's Kanreya's last hope, at least, that's what Kaeya's father told him before abandoning him in Mondstat. Those words kept haunting him every day of his life, they made him feel like he didn't belong. On one hand, the nation where he was born was seemingly counting on him, on the other hand, he had come to consider the city of freedom his home. Especially now since both he and Diluc have begun repairing their once damaged brotherly relationship. Kaeya felt relieved that he was finally able to explain to Diluc, it had been so many years of him trying, yet getting pushed away. It broke his heart, and if it weren't for you, then he would still be in that same position.

But deep down, Kaeya knew that he would choose Mondstat. After all, Kanreya had already been destroyed. He didn't see the need to remain loyal to a place that had been gone for 500 years. He had found a family right where he was, and he didn't want to lose that, ever. Which is why he was worried, he was aware that the abyss, or what was left of Kanreya would eventually attack the city, and he was determined to stop it.

"Kaeya?" The blue-haired male was suddenly snapped from his thoughts by your voice. He had agreed to train you, with some hesitation from Diluc. However, he was having trouble focusing today, something you noticed right away.

"Are you ok? You seem worried about something" you asked, gathering his thoughts, Kaeya plastered a smile on his face as he looked over at you.

"I'm fine" he tried to reassure you, but you weren't buying it.

"No, you're not. If you need to take a break, I don't mind." You said, Kaeya sighed, you had always been observant.

"I think you need to take a day off" you told him, arms crossed over your chest as you huffed.

"I promised I would help you learn how to fight" he argued, not wanting to let you down. You smiled, wrapping your arms around him in a hug.

"What matters more is you, why don't we go get some food. Maybe we could get Diluc to come with us" you laughed. Kaeya did as well as he let you pull him toward the city. He finally felt at home.

----------------------------------------------------------

Kaeya was startled awake by the sound of scream, jumping out of bed he ran over to the window, throwing it open. With wide eyes, he scanned the city, his heart starting to race. Mondstat was in chaos, people were running and monsters were attacking whoever was in sight. Kaeya wished what he was seeing was a nightmare, but he knew all too well that it wasn't. Without another thought, he grabbed his sword and ran outside, heart racing. It felt as if it was going to beat out of his chest. The smell of smoke filled his nose as he made his way outside. The Knights of Favonious were fighting off the creatures as best they could while getting the citizens to safety, luckily, as far as Kaeya could tell, no one was dead.

"Kaeya!" Jean called out, looking toward the woman, the male tried to calm himself down.

"We'll handle things here, get Diluc" Kaeya didn't waste any time as he turned and made his way toward the winery. He trusted that the others would keep Mondstat safe. He wasn't sure how long it took, but soon, Kaeya had arrived to his destination. That's when he spotted something horrific in the distance. You were surrounded by Hilichurls and an abys mage. The sight made Kaeya want to vomit. You held a weapon in one hand, but he could tell you were injured.

"(Y/N)!!" He called out, Kaeya ran toward you, praying he would reach you in time. The abyss mage raised its staff to attack you. Adrenaline coursing through him, Kaeya pushed himself forward as fast as his legs would go. He was so close, but not close enough. Kaeya was forced to watch as you did your best to block the attack, but your effort wasn't enough. The attack hit its target, knocking you to the ground. Finally reaching the group of monsters, Kaeya swung his sword, knocking them all to the ground at once.

Rage filled his body as Kaeya quickly dispatched the monsters before turning his attention to you. At the same time, Diluc arrived, breathing heavily. Both brothers stared down at you, blood pouring from a large wound. Kaeya fell to his knees, not minding the blood that began soaking into his clothes. Tears began to well up in his eyes as he pulled you into his arms. Your eyes were half closed, and you were having a hard time breathing.

"I'm sorry" he spoke, trying to put pressure on the wound. You winced as Diluc stared down, tears streaming down his face. You tried to speak, but you didn't have the strength. Kaeya pulled you closer, he closed his eyes, beginning to sob as your breathing became slow. Eventually, you went limp. Kaeya froze when he realized this, more tears sliding down his face. Diluc and Kaeya both lost someone important that day. Even if the city was saved, Kaeya still felt as if he should have done more.

[cecekeating]

Jordayla S6 Finale Commentary pt.2

I also feel we need to know if Billy knew/was close to the uncle and whether Laura is even aware of this aspect of Billy’s life. If you recall in the wedding episode for Jordayla, when they announced Jordan and Layla as Mr and Mrs for the first time, the camera panned to Laura and GW before Jordayla. Laura’s outfit matched Jordan’s suit and it was the same material as Layla’s wedding dress. Laura and GW also gave Jordan marital advice. I saw all of this as a hint that Laura and GW will be the support system for Jordayla, especially on Jordan's end. This uncle arc is a perfect way to introduce them.

Another angle with GW, Jordan and this new uncle is to have GW and the uncle not get along at all and possibly hate each other and Jordan, being one to try and make peace is caught in the crossfire. This will likely be similar to season 1 where GW and Billy were at loggerheads on how to be there for Jordan as a footballer. Again, if the uncle is in the sports/football career path, slam dunk!

Now let’s talk about Layla. I don’t know about you but I am calling that motherhood arc for her next season. I am putting my money on 7a being when we find out about the pregnancy. I can also see the pregnancy being a storyline on its own - with the writing showing us how Layla is coping with pregnancy. Remember she has a history with mental health and it is not weird at all if we have her worried about slipping into depression since she has a history. The pregnancy arc can also be a good way to revisit Monica Keating. A big fear of Layla this season was the fear of ending up like her mother. We got a resolution of that fear in relation to Layla’s career/impending marriage. A pregnancy arc will be a good way to show us the resolution of that fear from the place of motherhood. From a writing perspective, this would hit harder if she begins to bond with Amina during her pregnancy. We also have her label. What will it be like as a pregnant woman running a business?

Another sidenote: I did think Layla leading the line of women to get Liv ready was a sort of foreshadow as her being sort of the female lead of the show. And she was seated next to GW and on the same seat with Laura - the woman of the house vibes. 

So happy Jordayla got the Baker house. I think we have been calling it for a while now. The Baker house is home for them and they get to keep the money they were planning to use to buy a house. Them getting the Baker house makes sense as the new Bakers and it has always been home for them, particularly Layla. Looking forward to seeing them live and build their lives in the Baker home next season. Them bickering over the cake slice was hilarious and super cute!  Jordayla is such an adorable married couple. 

So what will all this mean for Jordayla next season?

I personally feel season 7 will be similar to this season only that Jordan is likely going to be the one that has loads of stuff thrown at him- similar to Layla this season. I am still sticking to my theory in 612 that the Jordayla dynamic will flip and Layla will be the one looking after Jordan and being there for him. If she is pregnant, I can see some bit of their season 4 dynamic return with them coming through for each other at different times over the course of the season. My money though is on Jordan being the one that needs the most support in s7. 

So you can begin to see why the writing for Layla/Jordayla had to be airtight this season. Layla will need to be mentally and emotionally stable to support and care for Jordan this season. If we didn’t get this Jordayla arc this season, it would be difficult for the writing to convince us that Layla can actually support Jordan. Seeing her work through all her issues in what I consider to be one of AA’s most thorough arcs, will make sense when she begins to support Jordan and even as she navigates the pregnancy journey. 

So that is my yapping for this episode! I have loved writing this for you. If I have shared anything that makes no sense to you, please toss it out. Again, all I have written, I have written based on the established writing and what my writer/fan theory brain is telling me. I have no idea where NK is taking us to in S7 but I have a feeling I will be back with more Jordayla yappings! 

[genericpuff]

Just to add to the speculation: Rachel was on Twitter and instagram over the last week being really excited over how she's talking to Webtoon about LO's return date and seemed to be in good spirits, but now that we have confirmation of LO ending and her and Webtoon are now being really quiet about it, I get the impression she was expecting that meeting to be a renewal discussion but instead was greeted by Webtoon asking when she was wrapping things up with no offer of another season. I think WT was considering it since none of the S3 ads mentioned it was the last season, but they must be seeing the internal numbers and with the potential of the TV show not happening and less and less book sales, they must have seen no financial or business reason of renew it. The obfuscation both her and Webtoon are doing right now implies Rachel was blindsided by this IMO.

fucking OOF BRO

That was definitely an angle I hadn't considered, obviously it's still just speculation/tinfoil but from what I've heard about how cagey WT can be about communicating with their creators, it could very well be a possibility. That said, while it would SUCK for Rachel if that was the case, I feel like it's also something she shouldn't have been pressing her luck with for so long. TBH there's a lot of evidence to support the fact that LO has been getting "special treatment" for years now and I think a lot of that was based on the good will of how well the series performed in 2019/2020. When the series started going downhill, WT would have likely been willing to give her benefit of the doubt, but now with things going the way they are where people are clearly DONE with LO and Rachel isn't making any attempts to actually get her shit together, it would make sense if WT is just finally deciding to cut their losses.

Of course that's, again, HEAVY speculation. But I've seen series that weren't controversial or regularly criticized like LO get suddenly dropped without much warning for the creator (see: Yuna & Kawachan). The fact that LO has been going on this downward spiral for so long without any intervention or attempts to improve things just goes to show how much WT was banking on this series to succeed, especially after all of the time and money and advertising they had sunk into it. Even look at the awards that LO won this year, including the Eisner, which isn't an award traditionally won twice, lending credence to the fact that WT is buying her these awards to try and save their golden goose. It's too late to save it. It's barely managing to stay alive on life support.

If anything I hope this is a harsh but necessary lesson to WT to not undercut their other creators and series just to shove all their eggs in one basket. There are so many series on the platform that could be massive hits if WT would just extend them the olive branch and give them the same royal treatment they gave LO for so many years. There's no reason all of their resources need to go into one series, it's not a pie, everyone should be able to get the opportunity to be seen within their library. Otherwise, if for some reason WT can't allocate those resources due to the sheer number of series on the site, then that should be a wake up call to lessen the amount of titles that are being churned out into the Originals catalogue every week. To be fair, the launch weeks have lessened over the past year, they're not quite as overstuffed with launch titles as they used to be, but it's still a lot compared to what it used to be back in the day.

The reality is that LO was released at a time when the site wasn't nearly as oversaturated as it is today so it was created at the right place, right time - if it was released today, it would likely be another buried series with little to no advertising. It was a product of its time and that time is very much long gone.

[willows-unnamed-rpg]

Post 1) Overall idea - turn based pirate rpg/ttrpg system

TLDR: I am working on a ttrpg system as a basis for a turn based rpg that is magic, piracy, and exploration. A focus on wealth and growth plus a vast world (hopefully). I am inspired by alot of things, mainly horror and pirate media, so the intent is a more darker setting

Ok onto the post :)

I figured if I actually want to get this bloody game in production I might as well start with a long post detailing some initial thoughts with some hope of any amount of actual engagement (doubtful that is). This thing has lived in my brain for weeks now and it has officially kept me up at night now. Figured I should post something out into the world. Now I guess I should have some form of organizing

Why a turn based rpg

Honestly, it's what I love. I grew up playing RPGs and I love table top RPGs. I figured it was this or action rpg and I don't want an action rpg. Granted it might fit the genre more but also I'm the one making it the thing so I get to call the shots (until someone else hops in if I ever get someone else)

I also Game Master several table top games currently so I have an understanding of combat flow and narrative, I am just used to others adding to the story rather than it being all me (since ttrpgs are inherently collaborative works)

I have some ideas for the system, something I want to go into detail when I am less sleep deprived, but in short I want it to be classless but still guiding the player to general play styles, like mage or tank. I know pirates and magic, but the whole magical dungeon diving fits exploring ancient ruins for money (plus casting a big old fireball at a ship sounds cool as hell).

So a custom rpg system?

Yes. Like I want it to work on its own as a standalone ttrpg system. Since I should be able to make it translate well into a video game. I mean that's the hope. I won't be the first person to do this (look at all the d&d games from the 1980s on dos to BG3, it works)

The idea as said above is classless with point buying perks (kinda like fallout). Unsure if I want it to be a d20 system but I am absolutely going for high roll is better since low roll systems hurt my head (looking at 2e dnd, had to learn it for some dos d&d games and it took a bit of getting used to). But it's all subjected to change since it's literally this post and my brain

Pirates?

You bet. Look, the only good pirate games are Assassin Creed: Black Flag and Sea of Thieves and both are subjective. Of course the big problem here comes from the question of how much time do we put into ship combat to make it fluid. Especially with turn based rpg combat. And I know that will be the challenge. I will not back down from this point. I want ship combat. Even if it's just boarding other vessels. I want fireballs to light gunpowder holds and deal massive damage. I want artificers repairing the ship and manning guns. I want the player to feel at full control and be able to react while making choices that fit into the system. Without it being full on simulation.

As for the player exploration off the boat, that should be easy, like any other RPGs. Of course I have done ttrpg games not video games so I know it will be a pain nonetheless but that's learning and art.

So about that world for exploring

I want that to be it's own post once I nail down the system's mechanics but in short, kinda an Isekai (well not literally, the player isn't from another world, not yet anyway) but all the "Species" (no idea what I want to use for the word) are not native to the world, and so they have been invited over time to explore a long dead universe that they brought in their own beliefs. Does that mean human Christianity mixing with let's say elven nature faith? It's been in my mind as a neat idea but also *yikes* as well. I want to be sure that I consider everything, including cultures who were exploited during the age of sail so I don't propagate more harm. So that will require a lot of research and help from those communities. I also don't want to plop in fantasy races "just because" since they probably won't belong. We tend to see them because Western fantasy is typically "eurocentric", and this game will not be. Pirates were European sure but that ignores so many other groups (Barbary Pirate, Malagasy, South East Asian. Again I need to do more research)

I have tied in my own Mexican culture into my ttrpg games before but that's my own culture and in a small group. This is far larger and I need to give the world the respect it deserves.

What kind of art style?

I am not a very good artist so this one will be in the air until I settle, but I need to grow or get help. I would like something near realism (Honestly like how the Paradox Strategy games tend to do art, EU4 especially since it's the right period of time but again that's eurocentric so who knows)

I can't settle on a style when I haven't even made custom stat blocks for creatures or even know what creatures will be in the game yet. I will say, I love pixel art but I'm aware of exactly how much work it takes to make it wonderful. I have exactly zero skill in most art/drawing and what I do have need work, so best get to doodling to get better

The story?

On my main blog I usually write (though I am bad at posting, let's not make that a habit shall we?) but that doesn't mean I'm good at writing. Writing like drawing is an art, so I need to work on this and get help from others as it warms up. I don't want to disregard writing, it's an rpg, it lives by the narrative.

Other than exploring the world for money, I like the idea of it being focused on either one country or one city. A pirate republic. You could leave on expeditions and come back and those would be arcs. Do everything around town, hang out with companions, romance, and then to move the narrative along we build up to an expedition that changes the republic. Kinda like Dragon Age 2 and Kirkwall (not going into it here since spoilers for the game) but I really like this idea. You can see growth and change and get an impact on the narrative. Obviously this isn't anything new. But it's always a good time

My Inspirations?

That is a hell of a question. I have alot, ranging from Dark Fantasy/Gothic Horror with Ravenloft, Dragon Age, From Software's Library, Lovecraft's work (he isn't gothic horror I know, Eldritch is different but also water monsters in a ocean setting hits good) to pirate media with One Piece, the "Pirates of the Caribbean" movies and the actual historical pirates I know.

And Obviously with any game, Lord of the Rings and System Shock 2 despite how far apart both are and possibly irrelevant they are.

I don't have any current "required reading" minus The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings (and maybe The Dunwitch Horror?)

I guess my inspirations lead me to a darker world, which fits real pirates well

[littleshadowlucy]

@voidbeau got it right, the inspiration for my last drawing of Argos was Possibly in Michigan! So they get a gold star ⭐️

More specifically this shot of it ⬇️

And because I am very happy with how it turned out, I wanted to talk about my art thoughts this time! :D

A little fact about when it comes to my artwork is that I draw it traditionally first before making it digital since it’s just easier for me, which means that these drawings can be in the making depending on my schedule and motivation, and this one took a while since I recently got a new job!

And while I was drawing this one I decided to go against having the flowers scattered around Argos since unfortunately flowers aren’t my strong suit and I didn’t want to repeatedly draw a single type of flower since I wouldn’t know what flower to choose so instead I decided to have Argos laying a flowerbed with things related to the series around him-

Now there are two obvious exceptions-

That being the barts spells and charms advertisement and the top left corner, so I’m going to explain why they’re there.

The flower in the top left corner is suppose to be a tuberose, though it’s probably not obvious since again, flowers aren’t my strong suit, the reason why it’s there is that apparently tuberoses can symbolize attraction, lust, and obsession for someone else, or the very least illicit and dangerous pleasures, and I thought it would perfect thing to add considering Mr. Plant and Argos’s relationship especially with the knife and letter we saw in Gardening with Argos 10 also scattered around!

While Bart’s spells and charms were added since Argos canonical has a shrine for Mr. Plant where he did manifestation to get Mr. Plant to think of him/want him and considering the fact that it’s hinted that they have other charms, I feel like Argos would have been the type of person to buy up their love charms if they have any and if he had access to it! Another fun fact, it was originally going to be an advertisement for Secret Admirer Mail since I fully believe that Argos was on the other end of the phone calls in that but decided to leave that idea for its own drawing in the future:)

Now Argos is holding three things, these being a photo of Mr Plant, a rose with noticeable thorns and the heart shop guy’s face

The rose is probably the easiest to explain since roses are the flower for romance, but I decided to make the thorns fairly noticeable to get the pain and pleasure symbolism, as well as every rose has its thorns symbolism, paired with a picture of Mr. Plant, it makes it obvious who those feelings are directed to

And I had Argos holding the head near his heart for the same reason, holding something close to your heart means that someone or something is very important to you, and I believe that it’s Argos’s most prized possession since when Mr Plant gave it to him, he realized that his feelings were returned and that’s when he and Mr Plant started dating

The soulmate flowers are there cuz when you think about it, it could honestly symbolize Plargos, atleast when looking at it with Argos in mind, Argos says that a soulmate flower would die if they don’t connect with another flower, and who was suppose to die in the series until their relationship came to save them? :)

the covetous flower is there since they just like Argos fr, atleast when it comes to Mr Plant, both of them are lovely to talk and they get attached and jealous fairly easily, I mean we never did see what the letter Mr Flower sent said 👀

Lastly the hearts around Argos are suppose to be the ones he got from the heart flower that he gives to Mr Plant, a continuous show of his love for him ❤️

Overall this was a fun art to draw and hopefully I can make more of these for y’all in the future, it feels my heart with such joy when people are enjoying my art, and it’s been such a godsend for my mental health

[crushingcasanova]

im so sorry for the late reply, my dear… in all honesty, there was so much writing i got overwhelmed… BUT i am now here and ready to write for you!!

i also absolutely love talking about musicals, and theatre in general. i could talk about epic for .. a long time. since you haven’t seen it i won’t spoil anything in the story, but the writer is so incredibly smart. ever character has a instrument dedicated to them, and its so interesting to hear the background music, and HEAR what its telling you! there’s certain motifs that tell you different things throughout the story, and humans always have less electric instruments, while gods have electric instruments!! the way he sets everything up is so wonderful.. and the lyrics!! my god the lyrics .. they tell a story unlike any show ive ever seen. the way he alludes to certain things with his lyrics, brings back lyrics that were sang earlier in the show, the way he sets everything up to tell a perfect story, to give you the exact feelings he wants you to feel.. i could yap so much more.

omg, that’s so nice of you to make jewelry for other people!! im not surprised, you are kind beyond expectation <3 im sure the jewelry you make is absolutely beautiful. ughh im pretty good at math .. but that doesn’t mean i like it.

im so glad you’ve had people to help you through it, and that you’re working through all that!! that warms my heart. :) of course i care to talk to you!! i quite enjoy talking to you , excuse me .. hmf >:( /silly

i always think of buying things as “giving them a home”… especially my stuffies. i have many. they are very happy with me (i hope)

we actually dress pretty similar!! that’s so cool hehe:) i also would consider myself hyperfem and maximalist!! also, what?!? i didnt know you were in love letter!!! .. i may or may not be on there too ..

OMG your doggie sounds absolutely adorable omgggg!!! ughh i can’t give myself away now that i know you are in love letter .. i will just say i have a few dogs ..

also don’t worry, yap as much as you’d like!! i love to listen <33333 i truly adore it!! now .. i have a few questions !!

i do NOT mean this in an ignorant way .. i apologize if it comes off that way .. :,) your beloved and your darling, are you all .. together? or is it platonic…??? if you are all together … are you looking for a fourth?

AHHH im so sorry if that question comes off rude at ALL im sorry im sorry im sorry forgive me forgive me 🧎

NERVOUSLY SIGNING OFF … 🎭

I'm sorry if I overwhelmed you with my yapping, dearie!! I'll make sure to keep this one a tad more concise :) It sounds like there was a lot of dedication in Epic! I've read the original myth, so you can always spoil it if you'd like :) I love when artists use motifs and symbols and draw things from previous works, it makes a much more cohesive piece and allows for everything to flow together so nicely! The continuity is awesome! I actually run a little jewelry business, so I make stuff to sell to people when I have free time (I haven't had a lot of time this summer or this fall, so it's been a little dead, but I'm hoping to make some stuff eventually!). I like making inspired pieces though, so it is usually gifts :) I made my school friend group a nice set of key chains / necklaces for last Christmas, actually! They were all color coded :D I appreciate you saying that you like talking to me, Cheshire; it means a lot :) I also have a lot of stuffed animals, so I get the whole thing about giving them a home. I have a few really special ones that I've done that for especially :) Also, yes! I've been in love letter for almost a year now, I think. I'm not so active right now, but I used to write lots of fantasies. I now usually use it for reading (I like to observe conversations and such) and for gushing or sending letters to my beloved and darling, who are both in the server. I'll keep an eye out for you now that I know! (But I won't look too hard, in case you'd like to remain anonymous!) it's cool that we both have dogs!! And our fashion styles are similar :0 I have to actually figure out an outfit for this thing I'm going to tomorrow... so I have to go through my closet a bit, haha. As for your question about my loves: I'm not together with any of them, but there's a level of devotion akin to that with my darling and they are my main priority (and i have full intention of continuing my bond with my beloved forever, though it's not inherently romantic and there isn't commitment in that sense) that would be something to consider. I'm not inherently against gaining another darling and the only other person I'm 'pursuing' would be Venus (Hi when you see this, little cloud! I miss you!!), but I'm not sure I could guarantee anything because I'm aromantic (cupio for specifics) and take a while to really consider people one of my darlings or one of my favorites. I have a bit of an issue with getting really close to people, mainly because I'm afraid of being judged or too vulnerable, so it would definitely be a long time. If you're interested in getting to know me otherwise, that is also okay :) I really only end up with those who I finally feel really care about me and who give me a certain amount of security in their life, but I am still quite affectionate with my other friends too! It was not rude at all, I don't mind clarifying things for you at all so long as it helps you :) I hope that answers your question!

[officialgleamstar]

in my feelings about monsters and mommies au morgan and how i only ever make her deeply depressed, so heres some (genuinely) cute/fun facts about her rather than the constant angst i give her:

though not a musician herself, she practically grew up at concerts and considers music her main interest

related: her dream job is being the owner of her own record store!

at the start of mnmoms au, she is an overnight stocking manager at a grocery store. however, after the timeline jump to the foster timeline - she has her dream job! shes the main breadwinner of their family with her own record/general music store.

she/they not necessarily in a non-binary way, but not quite a cis way either. she's always had a pretty loose grasp on gender, and after nick comes out as trans, she realizes that she doesn't really care about being seen as strictly a woman. she just also doesn't care enough to think deeper on it LOL

she is the ONLY MOM to know who the omega daddies are at first. this doesn't sound like a fun fact, but it is actually pretty funny for morgan and bill to be pointing at each other like "why are YOU here?!" while the other moms are like "...? morgan who are these strange men who kidnapped our kids?"

since she loves the color blue, nick (and nicholas in the foster timeline!) buys her any blue jewelry and clothing he finds and can afford. because of this, morgan has a generally younger fashion style than the other moms, because she likes wearing the clothes her son buys her/points out to her in stores

as the AU season 1 goes on, morgan loosens up a lot and the other moms learn that she is actually capable of being pretty silly. she likes dancing a lot, she sings off-key to any song that she knows, she's a big fan of stupid puns and disney jokes. shocker shocker, local woman is capable of being a normal human being when given the chance!

her favorite holiday is new years, tied between western new years and chinese new year! she just likes the idea of fresh starts, being with family, and the bright celebrations

she met glenn at a casual music competition held at a local bar, where he won against her boyfriend at the time. when she tells this story, people always ask, "oh, and he impressed you so you broke up with your boyfriend?" and she cheerfully responds with, "no, i tried to break his nose to defend my boyfriend's honor! we ended up dating later on."

she has a weird hate crush on erin o'neil, where she's utterly head-over-heels for her but can only express it by pissing erin off. everyone hates it except for morgan, but after hearing the glenn story, it makes a lot more sense

post-season 1, she gets really into messing with jodie. she finds the way he gets riled up funny and also kind of adorable.

(she's utterly unaware of it, and jodie would never say it, but jodie's original morgan was the same way so he finds it comforting whenever he snaps at her and she just starts laughing at him. he always found it genuinely annoying with his morgan, and it was definitely a splinter in their relationship, but he struggles more with finding offense with it now that she's gone. (whoops sorry i said these weren't gonna be sad))

post-timeline jump, nicholas is the absolute center of morgan's world. he's her favorite person to be around, she will drop everything if he needs her or just wants to hear her voice, and while his high anxiety can set her own anxiety off, she never finds it hard to reassure him. and luckily for morgan, he's a total mama's boy and clings to her just as hard, even if the sudden shift in his mom's personality confuses him

shes pretty close with the other kiddads, especially sparrow and grant since theyre close friends with nicholas post-season 1. shes perpetually confused by why, but the kids all think shes the coolest mom on earth and are very happy to tell her so (its because she's been to jail.)

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

The Bugle's been going for sixteen years, as of October 15, 2023. I like that date, because it's only two days after my birthday. I enjoy that around my birthday every year, The Bugle also has a little birthday celebration. And they do. On their very first birthday, in October 2008, they had cake in the studio in England where Andy Zaltzman was and in New York where John Oliver was and they celebrated their project surviving for a year and it was really sweet. And every since then, they do something like that. Last year, they marked the big fifteenth anniversary with a tour of live shows, and a special John and Andy reunion episode that made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes while listening to it on a bus, prompting me to pull my mask up and hat down to hide my reaction, but it wasn't quite enough to avoid getting a few strange looks.

No big tour this year, but Andy Zaltzman did write a special In The Bin section with some nice callbacks, that I transcribed for the Bugle fans on Tumblr who might not be following the current version of the podcast but enjoy references to the original:

Andy Zaltzman: As always, a section of this podcast is going straight in the bin. This week: a special Bugle sixteenth birthday commemorative section. At sixteen now, The Bugle can start voting in some parts of the world, including, crucially, Ecuador, and the Channel Island of Sark. So that’s very exciting, that we can now vote in those parts of the world. Anuvab Pal: It’s time to rig some elections in Ecuador, that’s what I’m thinking. Andy Zaltman: Look, Bugles, if you want an election near you rigged, just email us and we will do what we can. The Bugle can now buy cigarettes, although obviously it wouldn’t want to; if a podcast starts coughing and spluttering it’s not a great listen. It also means that The Bugle is, depending on where you listen to it, now legally allowed to consent to, um, uh, be played at the same time as another podcast, also over the age of sixteen, I think. Sadly, the minimum age for marriage in the UK was recently raised from sixteen to eighteen, so the planned wedding between The Bugle and the 2001-born TV drama series 24 will not be happening yet. Bit of an age gap, but it would have been fascinating to see Jack Bauer’s comedic take on the week’s global news, and to see what storylines they came up with for The Bugle. Could the Los Angeles counter-terrorist unit stop The Bugle’s Machiavellian scheme to establish a professional four-day cricket championship in California before it was too late? I, personally, would have watched that repeatedly. Also, The Bugle can, at the age of sixteen, and this is not a moment too soon, now go and get a proper job. It can also change its name, legally, and from what I’ve heard, from sources close to The Bugle, it is considering a change of name, at this point, at age sixteen. Amongst the possibilities: The Barak Obama Interview Show – apparently there are certain legal issues with that; Zaltor the Merciless Dispenses Wise Judgement to His Adoring Yet Fearful Subjects – I can see that working; Bible Studies with Mildred and Herbit – bit of a mix-up; Andy Zaltzman’s Fashion, Style, and Romance Tipscast – let me live my dream; Tonight Last Week – I’m not sure that’ll work; and Two Celebrities Phone it in and Take the Cash – I mean you have to adapt to the changing podcast market. Or, uh, Hot Rod and Dragster Ride Again. All those are possibilities, but that section is in the bin.

I think I said "Aww..." out loud about three times during that part. The little references! To Hot Rod and Dragster, that time in 2011 when Chris Skinner made a brief joke about those being fun nicknames for Andy Zaltzman and John Oliver and it was meant to be immediately forgotten, but the fans addressed emails to those names for years. The little reminder of how John Oliver and Andy Zaltzman spent the first few years of The Bugle really into the TV show 24, which sounded especially weird coming from Andy because he never likes anything that isn't sport or the music of Boney M, it's so rare to hear him be a normal person who gets excited about a mainstream thing in popular culture, to the point where he first started referencing 24 I thought he was being ironic, but eventually it became clear that he had actually binged every episode and just wanted to talk about it. And obviously he also threw in a reference to that show Week Last Tonight or whatever. Small references to Bugle history in the 2023 anniversary section.

[malottie]

1, 6, 12, 39

get asked things, dork (affectionate

welp, get your reading glasses out everyone

1: 3 things that shaped me into who i am

-1: luck. from the classic things like being born in a wealthy western country, being white (not inherently lucky but made me privileged/safer), having a relatively nice familly with no financial struggle, etc, to smaller stuff. like, it's a miracle i was never bullied in school. if it wasn't for that one person, maybe i would've died. i had free access to the internet since i was like 9, and somehow never stumbled on stuff that was inapropriate for my age

i consider myself quite lucky, despite all the hardships

-2: being trans. sorry to the people who think it's cringe when we make it our whole personnality, but it is litteraly so important. so central. i cannot fathom what i would be like if i weren't trans. that's just not the same person

-3: having weird ass parents. by that i mean that they're almost not like parents, more like... people i lived with that cared for me? i of course mean that in the sense that i don't have any special emotional attachment to them and all, but also that it doesn't feel like they raised me because they transmitted so little to me. my way of seeing the world, my hobbies, my fears, my political opinions, my general knowledge, my understanding of myself and others, my skills, i got them from, well, not them. the internet school, my friends, but not my parents. truly, i don't really know these people

6: best and worst part of being online

i've been here most of my life, so all the bad is just part of it. yes, that's where all the haters are. sure, all of the horrible things in existence can be found here. but that's also where my friends are. that's where community is. that's my only way of accessing at least 50% of what makes me happy. it has taught me so much about the world and myself, has held so many fulfilling experiences for me

if i had to choose 1 worst, i'd say transmisoginy i guess? i dunno, girl, i'm not even popular enough to get hate mail

12: a piece of advice i'd like to give

like i said in a previous post of mine i'm just 18. i'm like a baby. i feel like the least qualified person on earth to be giving advice. but i'll say one thing: advices are kinda bullshit. in essence they're opinions you think will be helpfull to someone else. but in my experience, they rarely are, especially when talking about life choices, mental health and the such. i watched hundreds of hours of self help videos, listened to people, went to therapy, and i felt like a fucking moron. i knew all the things, i had the advice, but it wasn't working. in the end, what helped me crawl out of the pit is time, love, and a bunch of stuff i'll never know about. find what works for you and ditch what doesn't; it's not because a piece of advice is true that it is helpful. searching for your solution will probably work better than just trying to apply the solutions others found

39: a youtuber i'm obssessed with

hard and specific

brennan lee mulligan? absolutely obssessed. a youtuber? not really

thegreatreview (he's french)? amazing youtuber. so fucking talented. obssessed? not really

dougdoug? obssessed by his entire cinematic universe for a while now. a youtuber? maybe 50%? it's all twitch streams highlights

john and hank green? ok i'll stop there

let's settle for brian david gilbert then, the man so nice they named him thrice. please buy his bed.

most well known for his Unravelled series on Polygon's channel, like the one about the sonic bible or the one about the smash bros osha violations, his personnal stuff is simply perfect, sometimes whimsical, like "i wish that i could wear hats" or "Pumpkin Cowboy", sometimes horrifying, like the one about the american healthcare system or "Teaching Jake about the Camcorder, Jan '97", often a mix of both, like "we like watching birds" or "earn $20K EACH MONTH by being your own boss". his comedic genius is at its best when it is also at its weirdest. he's also the guy who made the sibling dance song, i guess

[hopetorun]

7, 10, 15, 18 please!

7. answered

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

a lot of writing sticks with me tbh! obviously i have now forgotten all of it due to being asked* but a few things that tend to leave me thinking about something constantly for days: a wrenching bittersweet ending where the protagonist is stuck with only imperfect choices, a scene where it’s so so clear what the non-pov character is going through and the pov character is totally missing it, really good metaphors especially ones involving bodies, great closing lines.

i consider something to be haunting me when i can’t get it out of my head! but i don’t really feel that way about my own stories because that’s so different. i cannot articulate it but it is.

*see previous response to this meme with a note about how i should be better at keeping track of snippets that stick with me

15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends?

i wish i was a person who wrote in the margins but i very much am not, mostly because i get too distracted reading to take notes. i do sometimes scribble stuff in my notes app for book club books so i don’t forget my thoughts but not always. i don’t dog ear pages but i do read in the bath and i also read while eating and stain my books with food. i therefore cannot judge people who deface books in other ways, and would not want to. books are meant to be read and loved and used. my cheeto-fingerprinted copy of little women and my baby blanket that i slept with until it was literally just scraps of thread and the handmade quilt my uncle had on his bed until he died that was worn to bits are the same, actually. we are meant to use these things and love them and that’s its own way of treasuring a thing. if any one person wants to treasure their books by keeping them pristine that’s fine but i treasure mine by loving them to pieces and having to buy a whole new copy to love to pieces again. and covering them in cheese dust fingerprints

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

from home by now:

It works for Matthew, and it’s the most comfortable he’s felt around Draisaitl in literally years. Maybe since they collapsed from the shower onto a hotel bed in Edmonton during the playoff bubble, wrung out and relaxed and extremely pleased with themselves.

“I thought that was going to be hot when you suggested but I didn’t realize how hot it would be,” Matthew said in that hotel room. Leon dropped a hand heavily on his ass, patting him twice and then letting it rest there.

“We’re going to be out soon,” he said. Matthew couldn’t argue with him; the Oilers had been thoroughly outclassed in their first three games, and he didn’t think they were going to pull off a reverse sweep. “We can maybe win one but I doubt more than that will happen.”

Matthew nodded. “Sorry,” he said.

“You’re not,” Leon said, but he laughed roughly.

“Not very.” Matthew shrugged. “I’ll miss this.” He regretted saying it as soon as the words left his mouth, but Leon seemed unfazed. If anything, he smiled faintly.

“Won’t miss having to sneak around whenever I want to do anything but watch TV in my room.”

There wasn’t a good answer to that; Matthew was willing to put up with it for hockey, but Leon was about to be on a plane back home. He shrugged, and a silence fell around them that felt heavy. Leon’s hand was still resting on his ass.

They were in Leon’s hotel. Matthew needed to leave soon, if he was going to be able to sneak back in and get enough sleep. It felt like breaking the moment would break something important.

Matthew did it anyway. He rolled himself out of the bed, patted Leon on the shoulder a couple of times and grabbed a towel from the bathroom to throw at him.

“I’ll see you around, yeah?” he said before he opened the door. Leon grunted, and the noise was almost like one he made on the ice sometimes. Made it easier for Matthew to slip him back into the Draisaitl box, smirking at him from across the ice, looking terrible in orange.

In the present, he’s still Draisaitl, but somehow more comfortable than a few weeks ago. His shoulders are relaxed, which is probably the alcohol, and he’s not walking like he wants to leave Matthew in the dust.

Matthew didn’t think—well, he isn’t sure what he thought, anymore. He thought Draisaitl hated him, and then he thought Draisaitl liked him, and then everything got muddled for a while, with the playoffs and then Matthew’s concussion making everything worse and hazier. At the end of it he thought Draisaitl hated him, but differently than the first time. It felt like—like something changed. Like there was a different thread underlying the way that Draisaitl shoved him and whispered insults and generally refused to look at Matthew at all off the ice after everything that happened.

Above them, the moon is still high in the sky. It’s almost full, a sliver missing off the perfect circle.

“Full moon soon,” Matthew says, because he doesn’t like the silence.

thank you for your submission and for not making me pick 😂😂 excited to get to talk a bit about the sex scene flashbacks, some of the first bits of this story i wrote! i had all these scraps of them tucked at the bottom of my google doc waiting for the right place to fit into the story. early on in the writing process i did a bunch of sketching out timelines of the bubble playoffs and how many days they were both in edmonton and how many times i realistically thought they might have hooked up. it was not many at all, btw. but i stuck to it.

the line about the concussion was a fairly late add, because my trusty alpha and beta readers did tell me i needed to seed it better. it still has that like, oh you weren’t here all along feeling to me! even though i know that’s not how it works for readers.

i didn’t look up whether there’ll be a full moon around the right time in the summer of 2026 for this scene. which is weird for me because i normally look that kind of thing up (huge shoutout to my best friend time and date dot com) but i wanted the moon to be almost full so it is. why do i always look this kind of thing up? well i like to be accurate or at least plausible in descriptions of weather and seasonal changes and when it’s dark outside but also i once read a book where the sun came up before 7 am in scotland in late december and i shrieked aloud.

[zirielladior]

ella's diary ୨୧

friday || 7.28.2023

hihi ella here !!

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

another nice-ish week. school starts on august 9th. i'm kind of sad, but at least i'll see some friends. i just don't want to do any school work. i still want good grades, of course, just.. without doing anything i guess.

my friend & i started a baking goal a few days ago. we were baking cookies and then his little sister came into the kitchen and asked if she could watch a movie with us. (she's eight.) and we said yes, we ended up eating all the cookies in three days, so we decided to bake again. we baked the famous pinterest jelly tart cookies. they came out pretty good, i almost burnt them because he went to shower and i started reading. but he got out soon enough and then went to check on them and they almost burnt. they're good though, i wish i could give you one right now for staying this look just to read <3 🍪

i spent a bit of today cleaning my room again. only vacuuming & organizing my closet, for almost the third time this month. and then i started reading another book i bought, it's called 'if he had been with me'. i saw it online & in a bookshop when i was in ontario for the summer, so i bought it! a lot of people say it's a little overrated, (not judging by the cover but by the actual book) and of course i saw it. i wanted to buy it anyway because it wasn't available at the library. (i can't really afford me buying books every other day so i usually go to my local library for books i see online that might be nice to read.)

also i've been writing a little bit of my own novel ideas. it think i might actually publish something, (hopefully if the KOSA bill doesn't progress.) on wattpad. not much of a fanfic although that's really the most popular side of wattpad. maybe. i'm really fond of writing a story that may reflect my dream life. you know..? like a good main plot with my dream lifestyle? don't know if it's a good idea though considering i just created this blog.

oh also, i've just started watching stranger things 4 !! i love the show up until now, but i've heard that vol. 2 could've been better. not sure, i just started episode one with my father on wednesday. i hope its not a weird season with a lot more people dying.

oh! speaking of which, i'm thinking of taking bass lessons soon. and maybe piano too. i've really wanted to play both for a while. he knows how to play bass, piano, drums, pretty much anything. he can make a tune out of recordings of every instrument and then he can make a nice instrumental song. he makes good poems so sometimes i tell him to make songs but he doesn't usually. he's making one now actually! i finally convinced him with elliot (his little sister) that he should write a song. so i think he's writing a song, maybe it's a love song for his crush. like i dunno but that could def be a reason why he's hiding it from us. otherwise he's pretty open about music and stuff.

him & i also went to a bakery in town. it was a bit close to the hotel his family & my family were staying at. (family friends trip, chill nothing weird.) so it was nice to go out and feel the night breeze. especially since i haven't been leaving the house much after being gone to ontario for an hour. we went shopping and i bought a cute cream colored mug with brown paint splattered on it, and a cute little baby tee that said gilmore on it !!

we went out to a cute bakery and had pastries and tea. we also bought candy from there for our sisters. mine's twelve and his is eight, but my sister's still pretty immature. they get along really nicely. his sister likes dolls, and my sister likes fixing dolls up. that's not whats immature about her, she genuinely acts five, but she loves dolls, and miniatures and making jewelry which i adore for her. if she's happy, i'm happy. in the end we both bought chocolate covered peppermint sticks with sprinkles. i think it was called lazy dog chocolateria. really great place, the food was sososososoo yummy.

anyway, so much for trying to keep a short entry. thank you for staying this long and listening to my conversations that were, really, just for myself considering not many people are going to listen to these.

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

love always, ella ୨୧