#untreated adhd

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

sometimes I get the feeling that nobody gets how dysfunctional and weird my life really is and that its probably all my fault because as hard as I might try I cannot seem to mention how bad things actually are without throwing lol in there somewhere. y’know what I mean lol

[ontheoutside-lookingin]

This is the part of my life where I put my phone down and live my life the way they did before smart phones. This is the part where I stop maladaptive daydreaming dissociating and dopamine seeking here on tumblr.com to the point of complete hopeless hyperfixation time-blindness followed by shame and regret at three in the morning. Lately I wish someone would smack my phone out of my hand every time and replace it with a notepad and pen or a book. I need to read and write more. I need to crochet more and dance around my kitchen more and play with my dogs more and drink more tea and eat more vegetables. I need to bake scones. I need to paint some little flowers somewhere on my walls. Tumblr is home but I need to get out more. I can’t do all this tonight, but I can dream about it. Goodnight safe cozy escape world in my phone 🌛🌠

[fedorahead]

pitch: a therapy to give us tools and resources on how to unmask as adults, because holy shit is it hard to disentangle the fedorahead people see from the fedorahead that i could be

[nattousan]

🏳️‍⚧️ trans people in my phone! 🏳️‍⚧️

A celestial being has given you the chance to go back to your life at 14 to do life over but with your current mind and memories...

tell me why

[imautistsick]

Shout out to ADHD for making me take a 2.5 hour nap after 3 cups of coffee

[mbrainspaz]

once again I have put myself in a position where I have 4 hours to do a week of work.

[the-demi-jedi]

Dear ADHD people,

So I've been struggling with undiagnosed / untreated ADHD for a huge chunk of my life, to the point I'm considering getting some diagnosis and eventually some meds.

The thing is - I'm a writer and I'm curious how do the ADHD meds affect the writing process. I guess they can either turn me into an unstoppable writing machine without any procrastination and distractions, OR they'll make me lose my edge and turn me into a Normal Boring Adult™ - sometimes I think it's the utter mess in my head that allows me to commit acts of half-decent writing.

Does anyone have any experience? Is there anything else about treating ADHD I should know?

Thanks a bunch!

[willinglyghoulified]

"This is why I'm about to quit my job."

-a Neurodivergent's Shpeil; a story and takeaway under cut

What is happening in my head: Why is he just standing there in the middle of the isle? Does he not know that he's in the way? I have to get to the next shelf, but I don't want to ask him to move, I've already asked like six times, and he's bumped into me twice. I just have to get past him somehow, then I'll be able to get the last few items I need and finish up this 712-piece order.

What actually happens: I said excuse me again, and he didn't hear me because he was talking to someone about which is better: pizza rolls or "chickie nuggies."

What happens in my head next: OH MY GOD HE IS SUCH A NUISANCE I ABSOLUTELY HATE HIM DOESN'T HE KNOW THAT HE'S A BURDEN IN THE WORKPLACE AND PEOPLE HATE IT WHEN HE SINGS PASSIONATELY TO EVERY FUCKING SONG THAT PLAYS ON THE SPEAKERS AND HE'S SLOW AND SHOWS NO REGARD FOR THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM AND WHY THE FUCK DOES HE STAND THERE SPREAD-EAGLE WHERE NO ONE CAN GET PAST HIM AND FOR FUCK'S SAKE I HATE HIS NAME TOO SOMEONE SHOULD HAVE NAMED HIM CHAD: LORD OF THE SHITHEADS BECAUSE GODDAMN AND OUR FLOOR LEAD IS JUST GOING TO TELL ME TO PICK UP HIS SLACK AND TAKE HIS CART AND FINISH IT BECAUSE HE'S TOO SLOW.

What actually happens next: I said excuse me yet again, and he heard me this time. I asked him if I could go around him, my heart beating out of my chest. He said sure, and I whipped my cart -- which is as long as a fucking countertop and about two hundred pounds at this point -- past him at high speed which probably isn't the safest choice.

The rest of the day: I stay pissed off all day, hating everyone around me, not speaking to anyone, and they all are looking at me like "goddamn I don't want to get in that bitch's way, she looks extremely unpleasant." My manager checks on me, asks me if I'm okay, and I can't explain anything to where he'll understand, so I fake a smile and say "yeah why? I'm fine. Don't worry about it, I'm just tired. Thanks for checking on me." I take out my frustration on my husband when he asks me if I want something to eat on the way home and I tell him I literally can't think straight and just want to go home and not to ask me anything again that requires making a decision or other long thought processes. My husband's in a shit mood now because he got his head bitten off by an overstimulated wife that just wants to wrap herself in a blanket and disappear from the world.

The takeaway: I don't know how many neurodivergents struggle with this particular symptom, but I'm extremely irritable around people. I want to be left alone. Being too close to too many people I don't like or hardly know causes me physical discomfort. I'm in literal mental anguish when I have to engage in conversation that I don't care for. I'm exhausted to think of meaningful responses when people talk to me. I even have a hard time responding to emails, texts, or chats, and I have a heart attack when I get a phone call. My mom has to make my doctor's appointments for me just so I don't have to get on the phone. And yet I stay working where I work because I'm terrified that I won't find anything else that pays me this much or suits my needs. I'm not disabled, and it would be extremely difficult to get disability in the US for stuff like this. So I continue to work in places I don't like, I continue to suffer around people I don't want to be around, and I continue to feel like there's something horribly wrong with me that no one else seems to have a problem with. It's just me. In my mind, I'm just messed up. I'm unlikable. I'm overlooked. I don't matter. And if I fail at this job like I've failed at all the others, I'm worthless, too. And I can't afford to fail again.

[thvanatos]

neurodivergent folks is it normal to start hallucinating like randomly or like

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

“Treat others how you want to be treated” is a cute sentiment but such awful real life advice that has gotten me into endless predicaments. Neurotypicals do not want to be treated how I want to be treated.

Turns out that among all eight billion of us, there are a few different sets of values and preferences and neurotypes. Turns out not everyone wants to be treated the same ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[spvrkvoid]

Having adhd is like constantly wasting extra effort others don't waste. It's like sueing a hole over and over and it appears again and again. It's like when Soundwave and Hot Rod (from transformers cyberverse) were forced to eternally brush off the rust. It's doing incomparably much more to live on the same level. Sometimes even on minimal. For that, they must believe us, respect us, not shame us.

Well it's exhausting.

The world, bitch, let me live in peace.

[ontheoutside-lookingin]

Me @ myself but then I figured maybe someone else could benefit from this self-reminder so…

ADHDers that rely on medicine to get anything done are valid

ADHDers that decline meds & have a very hard time ever getting anything done are valid

ADHDers that somehow fall somewhere in between are valid

ADHDers that love their work enough to hyperfixate/not need daily meds are valid

ADHDers that manage to get things done without medicine are valid

ADHDers with comorbid conditions are valid

ADHDers that have to or cannot medicate because of comorbidities are valid

ADHDers that have to or cannot medicate for any other reasons are valid

No one’s ADHD struggles are automatically more than or less than others’ solely based on medication choices.

Unmedicated is not inherently easier or harder than medicated. They both come with plenty of perks and drawbacks, some obvious and some less so, some you would never even think of until you live it.

But most of all it doesn’t even matter because it’s never a competition anyway and infighting hurts the whole community. Bottom line is that the world was not made for ADHD and none of us have it easy :)

[laestoica]

[heliographist]

 i could 100% see myself dying from one of these dental abscesses. if this happens and somebody stumbles on this i am very sorry i didn’t take care of it in time.

[no-context-nonsense]

[bruisedconscience-reblogs]

have some leftovers in my fridge i wanna prepare

the food’s in a metal tin that cannot under any circumstances go in the microwave

i have untreated adhd & therefore horrible memory retention

on my way to the fridge i had to chant to myself over and over “i cannot put the food in the microwave as it is”

this is a very bombastic / staccato phrase when spoken aloud, in a shakespearean sonnet / heavy metal kinda way

i now have to focus on the words harder rather than the metal track my brain is trying to put behind the words, henceforth making them lose their original meaning!!!