#try everything once etc etc
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
milk slushie :3
puppy you are insane for wanting to put ice cubes in your milk!!!!! unacceptable!!!!! it melts and then thins the milk and then it mels some more and then you;re not longer drinking milk it;s just milk flavoured water!!!!!! /lh
i bet you use water to make your hot chocolate (also highly unacceptable) (booooo)
-brainrotbot
i was witness to @crow-cap slapping hot sauce on an orange for "character immersion" purposes so i think i have reason to believe putting ice in milk wouldnt be out of the question /j
#im being slandered on the internet /j#fav#shenanigans#hot chocolate with water IS good tho#said by someone who gets a tummy ache from drinking that much dairy milk#but ye!!! milk sucks ass but id totally try it as a slushy#try everything once etc etc#if you think about it’s just like pouring milk into a normal slushy which would technically make a milkshake. a very crunchy milkshake#then you just take away all the flavour that made it a slushy so you get icy crunchy milk#maybe it’s good#ill get round to trying it some time for the bit if nothing else#curiosity killed the cat i suppose#but im not a cat!! therefore milk slushy is fine#speaking of which. ive got a hella goofy idea for a sona update#I’ll get to work on it eventually and it’s gonna make me so happy#.txt
43 notes
·
View notes
Text
A few silly little small sculptures that I made with some of the leftover clay from the main one I did recently
#sculpture#birds#neopets#sparkly little aishas my beloved.....#Though I actually kind of liked them with a matte finish more?? I wanted to try out making them sparkly and shiny..but#I think they might have looked better before adding all the shine. BUT I kind of like both. Maybe I should make two more that aren't shiny#just to have variation lol... an entire army of tiny aishas.....#The little house is so bad lol I hada headache at that point and kind of just wanted to get everything over with#(I bake the clay all at once so I had to get the smaller ones done to go with the main one)#and was like.. zero effort into making things line up or measuring at all. one window on one side is like twice as big as on the other lol#but I think from afar ifnot examined too closely it's still kind of cute. The birds were also just random like 'what can I shape out of thi#s small blob of clay I have leftover' etc. I did actually put irridescent eyeshaow on the pigeon but it just doesnt show up in photos ToT#The other bird is not anything in specific... some sort of random fantasy creature bird with slight purple on it's wings or something#The strawberry is exclusively just a quickly done accessory for the birds.. I wanted them to have a little meal to share#even though I dont know if birds eat strawberries#the last picture in the set is them all sitting on a shelf (the most well lit place I could find) but looks weird#since it has all of my avocado pit eyes in the background......... ominous backdrop for such peaceful little creachures..#you kind of cant tell what they are from that angle though i guess lol
152 notes
·
View notes
Text
THANKS @kimdokjafan you are so kind and generous. ok im cashing in the first of three blank checks to talk about faith trust and pixie dust (most recent chatfic) because the last two directors commentaries were too serious so let's do a silly one.
some p5r spoilers, and this is mostly about sumire, and it's long again. do i need to keep disclaiming that these are long? you should know me by now.
i had this written for a while before i started formatting it because i wasn't really sure if i should post it? i feel like silly chatfic is something people go to for predominantly lighthearted nonsense so i was like, maybe there's too much plot and dramatic misunderstanding and i should just keep this one for myself. but then i was like well nothing matters and maybe someone will have fun with it. it's kind of terrible how much fully or mostly completed fic there is my docs that just doesn't see the light of day lol. write for yourself etc but i like sharing! too bad it comes with the mortifying ordeal etc. anyway that was a tangent
potato counter is a neopets game. there's no deep lore i just like neopets. i guess in this universe ryuji doesn't play neopets? or maybe he's just never played potato counter specifically. i also have a different fic where ryuji DOES play neopets. it's about neopets and ryuji and goro talking on neopets.
i think this might literally be the first time ive written sumi in a fic because i haven't actually written that much fic for royal, like, now that im looking, literally almost none? and none that had a group dynamic. so it was kind of fun to find her voice for the first time in a silly groupchat like this. i was worried people would find her exclamation marks annoying but i personally thought it was endearing so i added it in there.
every time i do a gag where a character corrects their own typo i have to code more stupid little bubbles to make it happen but i think it's worth it. all the effort that goes into making tgis look as much like a real chat as possible
this obviously doesnt take place in the canon p5/r universe, but im imagining sort of a postcanon sumi personality where she's more comfortable being herself and isn't borrowing kasumi's brand of confidence, but she's visibly a really anxious person without that kasumi veneer. i also think in this universe sumire is a fairly recent addition to the friend group, and while everyone likes her a lot and she really likes them, i kind of wanted to emphasise that feeling of being in a friend group where everyone's established and you're sort of a plus-one? you don't really fit yet. part of that is her being new, part of it is her anxiety, part of it is just the kind of person sumi is where she's so polite and self-conscious she ends up taking herself out of things with her own good intentions. stuff like her interrupting the flow of an existing conversation by greeting everyone instead of jumping straight in because she doesn't feel comfortable inserting herself, which means everyone else stops to greet her even though that doesn't normally happen in a friend group, or making a point of thanking everyone for being invited to events while the others take it as a given.
idk i love that she feels a bit out of place with the phantom thieves in p5r. and part of that is a natural consequence of being a new addition in royal who can't be naturally integrated with an existing dynamic but i honestly feel like the writing team realised that and acknowledged it, and really leaned into it, and that made it work incredibly well for me. like, it's part of her character that she's sort of an outsider. it's not like p4g's incredibly clumsy integration of marie and subsequent attempt to shove her down everyone's throat as the canon love interest in p4ga (knife). sumi has that outsider vibe on purpose and it makes me really like her dynamic with the thieves as an individual
goro also feels slightly out of place in these chats, but his conversational style blends more naturally with the other thieves at this point and he even uses their codenames sometimes. i keep saying my chatfic series isn't a real Series because the lore keeps changing, but if we accept that they're all kind of following a General Continuity, assume this takes place some time after the last fic in which ren added goro to the groupchat and they made an effort to integrate him into their friend group. he's kind of there now and has settled into being the weird boyfriend. that's his role.
every time goro says something like "ren and i" assume it's the text equivalent of him talking to the group with his arm around ren's waist.
ok i got really fond of this silly running joke where sumi brings up the weather when she's feeling uncomfortable. she's so polite. i like this thread because setting it up meant i got to tie it off like this:
this just made me happy lol i liked writing this. i tried to use it to demonstrate that despite goro's abrasiveness he obviously knows sumire pretty well, he's attuned to her quirks and knows how to tell when she's having a bad time with her anxiety, so he uses her little weather habit to ground her.
i honestly dont think goro and sumire could be considered close in p5r and as much as i like the "royal trio" in canon they're not really... like... friends? with each other? they're both attached to ren, so it' more a V shape than anything else. but that said, i really LIKE goro and sumi's canon dynamic. he takes a really grouchy but politely attentive supervisory role to her during their few forays into the palace as a trio where he doesn't really know her well but clearly identifies her as a harmless little tryhard who needs some guidance and steps into that role grudgingly, and she immediately looks up to him despite being very wrong footed by his ruthlessness, which i find incredibly charming. i think given time they could be good friends, they just didn't get much chance to know each other very well in canon. so i tried to kinda do that here.
once goro stops being evil and joins the group they all kind of tiredly accept that his role is to occasionally push a cup off a bench while smirking and refuse to clean it up. emotionally, i mean.
wait i need to backtrack chronologically to talk about akeshu.
in this scene they're in the same room lol talking and snickering while typing. im trying to get at that vibe of the annoying couple who is flirting with each other, via you. you know? like ostensibly they're talking to you (sumire) but everything they say to you is part of their stupid game. sumi is incidental to goro and ren teasing each other about flirting with someone else, goro is reporting everything ren says because his boyfriend is so eye-rollingly foolish in a cute way. they're very tickled by how amusing and charming they are. gross. disgusting. sumire im so sorry for putting you through this
anyway here are too many of my favourite jokes from the fic
#futaba gets a lot of my favourite punchlines because i love her. i think she's an incredible vessel for comedic timing#once again you can see how much i overthink everything#given the amount of thought that goes into character shit for what LOOKS like a stupid 3 second chatfic#but is really. a stupid 3 second chatfic with twenty years of overthinking behind it#it takes time and effort. to be this stupid#anyway i love sumi. i think she's so cute. i like her dynamic with the thieves so much#ive said it before but i think chatfic is one of those mediums that looks so deceptively simple because#you know it's just silly dialogue and memes. it's very accessible. anyone can write a funny chatfic#but i think it's such a character-forward 'genre' that it's really really difficult to do well in the sense that it feels like the characte#s you know and not just mouthpieces for memes with familiar names attached. so im kinda obsessed with the genre#it relies so heavily on every character having a distinctive voice without trying too hard to be unique#ideally you should be able to read one of these with no names attached ands till get a general sense of who's talking#without having to rely on liek (sorry) homestuck style quirks which make it visibly obvious#that' skinda hard because irl people's typing styles aren't THAT distinct you know. theres only so many variations#you can make to a person's use of grammar punctuation capitalisation etc before it becomes a gimmick instead of an idiosyncrasy#but hopefully if the character voice is strong enough their identtiy should come through more subtly anyway. idk .idk if im there but i lov#to work towards it#wow i wrote anothr essay in the tags about my love for Modern Epistolary Fiction (chatfic)#after already writing a whole essay in the post#i mgonna shut up guys thanks for having me#rookfic#asks#p5#rookthots
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
genuinely believe that the only correct way to approach the whole marecal vs mareven deal is to adore all three of them with your whole heart. and see them as a trio rather than a love triangle. like sorry but if you don't lowkey fw all of them and like each of them as a character on their own AND accept the many layers of the relationship they have with one another you're not getting things right :/
#marevencal platonic besties when#WHO SAID THAT#no but seriously would've loved for both Calore brothers to NOT confess to Mare cause they don't want to pressure her Or ruin their-#-relationship. so they simply stick to being friends#i am aromantic-spec the platonic bffs au haunts me wherever i go#and i do believe (out of pure wishful thinking tbh) that it was like this at some point#that in the time Mare spent in the palace in RQ1 -say the first weeks- the three of them had this sort of dynamic#mainly because neither Calore had confessed yet#men ruin everything#anyway i do absolutely believe in order to understand their characters truly you need to understand first#that they loved one another. so ppl who think the calores truly hated each other or that-#-mare didn't really loved cal etc etc. sorry but i don't think you get it :/#sure their dynamic and relationship is complex but idk it's also not that hard to understand#once you take the fuckass “love triangle” lenses off that the story soooo insistently tries to put aaaaall the time#me thinks#marecal#mareven#red queen series#red queen#also i said marevencal for their trio name solely bc mareven sounds prettier than marecal 💔💔#also. i ship marecal and not mareven lmao#this is not a mareven apologism post🙏#(at least not -never- as a ship)#i was just trying to say that people should be more chill when it comes to them#and learn to see the THREE of them a the three protagonists too#rather than refusing to explore their characters/dynamics outside of “which Calore brother do you ship Mare with”#which. a LOT of people in this fandom seem to do#and sadly tbh. because their dynamic (of the 3 of them) is so much more interesting if you diverge a little bit from what is “canonically”-#-correct/if you explore it diverging a little from what the text says#can you tell that i don't particularly fw love triangles at all. this may be the only one i tolerate. and BARELY
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
to be completely honest i think the biggest thing that holds me back from making ocs is i focus so much on difficult dynamics that no matter how i envision a character, there's some type of offensive way it could be interpreted and it just... stops being fun. of course you need to have some considerations for avoiding blatant stereotypes but it rly does hold me back from developing anything out further bc it feels like everything i go to make is tainted and Problematic TM.
#txt#i should just. not care for the first stages and then tweak once i have something more substantial but it's like#i want to write fucked up stories or have fucked up fanon ocs#i also would like to have diversity in my stories!#so inevitably some horrible people who do horrible things are going to be representative of some minority group!#and that's not always bad! there are balanced ways to do it!#however! i am forever trapped with the mentality of having severe anxiety growing up on tumgnlr dot hell where#literally everything forever at all times can be contorted into something problematic even when it rly isn't#and that has unfortunately infected me on a permanent basis that i need to just not pay attention to#i just did not realize until now as i am actively trying to force myself to create that this is the block that#has kept me from moving forward with things in the past in quite a few ways :')#consideration for these things is good but not when it is that controlling esp when people with 0 consideration#are the ones then completely unimpeded and putting stories out into the world instead etc#realistically no one would even give a fuck about the things i make!#i am no one!#and i am literally just trying to write and draw things for my eyes only! and yET!
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
#probably my last sunny walk at home :(#keeeeellll meeeee#i think one of the things i hate about going back to uni is not being able to experience autumn and winter at home like i used to#it’s weird because i’ve always loved them and considered them my favourite seasons.#but last year (and now this year) i’m realizing that oh! i think it’s because i got to come home after a long day and be in a safe familiar#space. and at uni everything is still a bit unfamiliar and not very comforting so the long cold days get so much harder#but i will surviveeeeeee#counting on gilmore girls to get me through it!! and also love is blind s7. i LOVE having things to look forward to every week it makes tim#fly by so fast. last yr every friday night was reserved for me and i ate frozen pizza or takeout and/or my favourite snacks and#watch my comfort films :( i cooked a lot those nights too 2 save money but yeah. it was rlly nice to have that comfy safe time to myself#i think it rlly got me thru uni.#ik it’s gonna be so hard to get back into a routine but im trying to tell myself that i need to like. focus on the basics first. adulting#can be so hard & i wanna do everything at once! i wanna b perfect in all areas. always do my hobbies. etc etc but i#i couldnt even get out of bed to make myself meals sometimes 💔 so i need to like remember if i don’t journal or read a whole book in a day#not the end of the world. and most importantly i need to be EATING and staying active and SLEEPING FIRST and foremost cause then hopefully#i won’t feel like a zombie.#okay anyways.#feeling sad feeling tired feeling unmotivated but also feeling a teensy bit excited for finally BEING ALONE!!!!#i have my cardiologist appt tmrw so maybe that’s why i feel so yuck also. just thinking abt it makes me wanna throw up#i hope everything goes well#anyways bye bye#♡ dear diary…
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
does anyone else feel like there’s little to no replayability for datv?
#txt#sophie plays datv#datv spoilers#<< not really but just in case#like beyond maybe trying a new rook faction to see unique dialogue etc and saving a different city in act 1#there’s no other Big quest choices????#like there’s no mages vs templars … no choosing the heir of ozrammar .#everything feels very linear besides some different convo options#once I finish Miriam’s run im gonna fuck around in the cc some more and make some alt rooks#but idk if im gonna do a full replay#which feels devastating because part of the joy of dragon age was the choices! and different world states! and the connections!#😞😞😞���🙃🙃
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
12 notes
·
View notes
Note
do u wanna talk about exes! vashwood :3 how would they bring you back to them :3
of course wanna talk about that….
okay do you mean like exes vashwood together? how they’d both get you back, together? bc if they’re working together you are TOAST.
i feel like they kinda good cop, bad cop you smmhhh. vash does the whole “we’re just checking in on you/we’re just worried about you” etc. bc he’s always gotta be the hero. and wolfwood sorta riles you up. is a little more brash and forward about his (their) intentions. does the whole “are you done?” bc he thinks you’re pushing them away in a self destructive way…..and maybe you are? it’s a little hard to tell, when they’re both there…fussing over you in their own ways.
vash pretends he’s harmless. gets a little too close and then holds up his hands in surrender when you glare at him, “ah, just trying to help,” he says with a sheepish smile. hangdog look on his face. he’s almost more frustrating than wolfwood for this reason…..sorta dumb as a fox. i think vash wants you to….come to him? wants to get you to cave without caving first since he’s respectful. you know? he respects the fact that you wanted to break up with them. right? but if you come back to him, well…
wolfwood is at least frank. he asks why you wanna torture them? or yourself? what are you hoping to prove? and then goes alright, you’ve proved your point. come back? and you have to shoo him off like a bad dog all the time. then he starts going, you’re breaking vash’s heart, honey. and then when that doesn’t work, he looks at you with rare puppy dog eyes and says, well you’re breaking mine, too.
i mean. they’re both so….desperate in their own ways? you can’t let them in and then cast them out, they’ll always come back. what are they supposed to do? just…leave it? leave you? you’re asking the two men who have never let go of anything in their lives ever….to let you go? right…and that’s supposed to go well….
they’re honestly awful about it all. but they do work hard to get back in your good graces. and they do probably come up with a scheme or two to try and get you back—they try to execute some plan that you catch on to and you have to go really? and they both look at you all sorrowful and sorry and sorta hopeful like…well, would it have worked?
GOD I CANT STAND THEM.
#wolfwood gets you into bed first perhaps#but then vash is hovering around you bc of course wolfwood then went to him and they certainly had sex as wolfwood told him everything#and what you were like and how he had you etc etc#and vash gets so desperate!!! truly like some lost puppy trailing after you until you give into his skirt chasing#and then once you sleep with vash it’s all over#you try and tell them it means nothing but like……….LMAOAOAOOOO#wolfwood all….like hell it means nothing#wants to fuck that attitude right out of you#have you babbling about how you’re theirs and you love him and vash and miss them#smmhhhh#cielo chats!
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Oh.
#according to facebook memories (why do i even have that still??) 12 years ago today i saw Linkin Park for the first time 🥺#in a few days it'll be 10 years since the last time i saw them#and. hm. there's a lot that surfaced this days since clancy dropped and i'm a bit more emotional / sensitive than usual#and this is. well. making me extremely sad.#12 years ago. i remember as if it was yesterday. i cling to that day so much and i'm scared of forgetting about it#i wonder how 14 yo me would've reacted if she knew.#they were my first gig ever! i remember the 2nd song was given up and the people around us started moshing pretty hard.#so much that my shoe came off and my dad had to shield me while i crawled and looked for it hahaha#it was so fun! i didn't really know that was a thing#that day was the first time they played Lies Greed Misery - it had been released just the day before#my videos are SO blurry but i still have them all saved 🥹#idk i've been in some typa mood these past days. not necessarily bad at all but.#me and a couple friends had a very important conversation 2 nights ago which was GOOD but. the bad thing about letting everything bottle up#is that once you spill it's hard to deal with. and yeah this is. idk. i'm just venting here like. ignore me.#it's just really hard for me. i miss him terribly and i'm really scared for myself because i *know* i'm back in the loop#and it feels so hopeless sometimes. maybe this is super silly but i'm so thankful that Clancy came out now because OH BOY i need it#maybe it's not the best strategy to put so much faith? importance? in like. music and other people but#man. i genuinely don't know if i'd be here if not for certain songs/artists etc#idk I'm rambling lol. i might delete this later#probably. maybe. i try not to talk too much about this here because i tend to deal alone but. sometimes it's nice to send things to the void#anyways. support your favs. talk to your friends - even if you much rather not. don't be like me and let things rot inside.#🤍#darya talks to herself
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
#i mean he would have done it bad anyway. so maybe it's a good thing he didn't even try.#they have the doctor (played by a cisgender woman) say ''i used to be a bloke'' like three times and that's IT.#AND it's played as a joke!#like. with everything chibnall said about trying to be inclusive and have ''lgbt representation across the spectrum'' (interview from 2018)#there really weren't any trans people in there huh#doctor who#chibnall critical#thirteenth doctor#delia.txt#once again me saying this is not saying rtd1 or moffat eras were better etc etc. hate that i have to disclaim that every single time.
137 notes
·
View notes
Text
btw i was still figuring it out but i made a sideblog this week in case y’all want to perceive me too besides my aftg hyperfixtation ((even tho the username is literally aftg related LMAO but anyways it’s @lailasdermotts))
#it’s mostly for myself tho bc i really need a clean looking space to go through sometimes#i will never try stalking this account to perceive myself it’s too messy#i’m sure once in a while i’ll reblog something about aftg too#because aftg is part of how i perceive myself#but it’ll be mostly about EVERYTHING else#so about music films books etc etc#just my other hyperfixtations ig :)
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinking about pre getting together sskk where Atsushi can sense Akutagawa is significantly more relaxed and affable with him when they're alone yet cold and mean every time there's other people around and he's deeply hurt by the change and them fighting over it and them telling each other “So you're mad I'm kind at you? What do you want Jinko” “I want you to hate me when we're alone too” because. yeah
#I don't have fanfictions in my mind I just have random line prompts that hit illegally hard#One could argue that Atsushi should be flattered Aktgw feels like he can drop the mean facade only when he's alone with him but actually?#I think that's exactly how Atsushi would react because Akutagawa being like that would trigger his terror of being–#inadequate / unworthy / not good enough etc etc#Let 👏👏 Atsushi 👏👏 be 👏👏 the 👏👏 immature 👏👏 one 👏👏 for once#But it's also specifically fitting for Akutagawa because for Akutagawa apparence really IS everything.#Especially where he was raised to think it didn't really matter how strong he was but whether Dazai recognized him or not =#how Dazai perceived him = how he appeared in front of Dazai = how he appears in front of everyone else for extension#They're so deeply fucked up...#atsushi nakajima#ryūnosuke akutagawa#sskk#shin soukoku#bsd#bungou stray dogs#mine#Also au where I don't have to get a diploma where I would write thousands of sskk fics#Also I just feel like it'd hurt Atsushi so much because he'd feel deluded and betrayed‚ in the way#“once again it turns out that no one really loves me- at least not as sincerely as to show it in front of others” :(#3am trying really hard to study Hans Kelsen but I keep thinking about Them#Please may the next exam go well 😭😭 I actually care a lot for this subject#q.#10/09/22
74 notes
·
View notes
Text
Tag drop: Dorian Pavus
#[ dorian pavus. ] he says we're alike. too much pride. once i would have been overjoyed to hear him say that. now I'm not certain.#[ dorian pavus: ic. ] you find joy in it not shame. it shows. / why be ashamed? power should be respected. not swept under the carpet.#[ dorian pavus: inquiries. ] stop talking like you're waiting for applause. / what? there's no applause?#[ dorian pavus: countenance. ] i'm here to set things right. also? to look dashing. that part's less difficult.#[ dorian pavus: introspection. ] selfish i suppose. not to want to spend my entire life screaming on the inside.#[ dorian pavus: meta. ] you inspired me with your marvelous antics. you’re shaping the world. how could i aspire to do any less?#[ dorian pavus: etc. ] you can't call me pampered. nobody's peeled a grape for me in weeks.#[ dorian pavus: magic. ] don't your spells whisper things to you? what is and could be? music in the mind of strange faraway places?#[ dorian pavus: inquisition. ] we're going to get lost and starve to death. aren't we? a glorious end for the inquisition.#[ dorian pavus: tevinter. ] despite appearances. we care deeply. about everything. we have no reserve. not in war and not in love.#[ dorian pavus: felix. ] even in illness he was the best of us. with him around you knew things could be better.#[ dorian pavus: gereon. ] we used to talk about how we could make real change in the imperium. then he gave up. he stopped trying.#[ dorian pavus: halward. ] i only wanted what was best for you. / no. you wanted the best for you. your fucking legacy.#[ dorian pavus: aquinea. ] her blame was cold and smothering. never spoken but always present. he couldn't face that. not yet.#[ dorian pavus: inquisitor. ] you have too many people asking you for everything under the sun. i won't be one of them.#[ dorian pavus: solas. ] you startled me. you're always so... nondescript. / please speak up. i cannot hear you over your outfit.#[ dorian pavus: varric. ] what do you think sparkler? ten royals says the next thing we run into farts fire. / taken i win either way.#[ dorian pavus: cullen. ] gloat all you like. i have this one. / are you sassing me commander? i didn't know you had it in you.#[ dorian pavus: cassandra. ] blue scarf? why would i be wearing such a thing? / It's a painting. work with me. it'll be fantastic.#[ dorian pavus: cole. ] you say you're handsome all the time. am i? i can't tell. / you're all right. might want to rethink the hats.#[ dorian pavus: vivienne. ] i received a letter the other day dorian. / truly? it's nice to know you have friends.#[ dorian pavus: blackwall. ] point is. you should let yourself off the hook. i know bad men and you're not one.#[ dorian pavus: sera. ] you magic me: i'll put three arrows in your eye. / now we can live together in peace and harmony.#[ dorian pavus: bull. ] no qunari would accept a tevinter mage unless it was a ruse. when should i expect a knife in the back?#[ dorian pavus: corypheus. ] one of yours? / one of mine? like a pet? a giant darkspawn hamster with aspirations of godhood?#[ dorian pavus: v. inquisition. ] one of mine? like a pet? like a giant darkspawn hamster with aspirations of godhood?#[ dorian pavus: v. veilguard. ] evil gods. rituals. waiting for the stars. it's about as tevinter as blood magic and hubris.#tag drop
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
Jen, v random but I think you follow the whatiwillsay pod? I was wondering if you had thoughts about their larry ep from a couple of years ago?
I do follow her on spotify, but I don't always listen (depends what I have in queue, the topic, etc). I *did* listen to that ep, though, and I disagreed with pretty much all of it MAINLY because you can't have it both ways, i.e., you can't say here's all this gryles proof, here's all this swiftgron proof, then dismiss larry or kaylor when it's the exact same amount of evidenceTM. Like, I'm all for reaching, reach away! But when you're matching, then match it! If it's fandom bullshit, call it as such, but where there's that much smoke, there's at least a wee bit of fire!
#it felt very much like well THIS one is real#but this exact same one isn't lol#all because of some insanity in the fanbase--and i get that#i saw it just recently in fact--like if you're gonna say shit like my ship is real! this 1/2 was pictured by himself in one city!#this 1/2 was pictured with fans in this other city half a world away!#THEY'RE MARRIED!!#it sounds insane because it is#and it means a lot of people will write off EVERYTHING ELSE accordingly#you can show randos outside of fandom early larry proof posts and the will 1000000% get it#but if you try to act like it carries over to today it not only does NOT carry over#it sounds literally insane and negates most of anything else#hence the big anti gap#if more larries left room for jesus (breakups etc) it would be a lot less crazy sounding#and yet!#ditto kaylors!!!!!#so I respect Cam as an outsider thinking hey yeah no#because she CAN accept that her ship (swiftgron) is done and over#but that said i still feel like if you're saying all this proof of gryles being so valid means you can't ipso facto larry NEVER existed#esp when you talk about louis's very clear jealousy...it's not purely just guys being bros who are pals...that just doesn't check out#and once again the fact that larries can't be YES they were a thing but they broke up later and/or it's messy#it has to be gold-star virgins who have only fucked each other#or else you're a full-on anti#well congrats you played yourself and excluded all room for nuance so OF COURSE you'll get podcasts saying larry is bullshit#it ain't that deep#it's also why a lot of this fandom is 'broken' etc#can someone like me be considered a larrie if i think they WERE a thing but they aren't any longer? i'm not saying they can't in the future#but i'd imagine i'm an ex-larrie in the eyes of the lord (redacted shitty blog names) and fine by me!#and yet that's not the full larrie definition you know?#so again OF COURSE podcasts not fully in this gatekeep mindfuck aren't gonna get it or even care#and more power to 'em i say
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Did driving practice today. Actually did parallel parking practice this time, even tho I really didn't want to still. Finally got it into my head that I can maybe do this.
SO......
I have scheduled my driving test. For November 13th, 3 weeks from today.
#speculation nation#IM SO NERVOUSSSSS but i need to do it. i need to. worst case scenario i fail and have to try again another day.#i was actually gonna try to schedule for a week from today but they were full up for the next 2 weeks.#so. 3 weeks! my therapist is gonna be happy for me when i tell her haha#this is. something ive been avoiding for over 10 years now. but i decided at the start of this year that This would be my year.#Year Of Unfuck My Life. and im finally doing it. im going to finally get my license.#it's so. huge actually. a similar level of Holy Shit factor as me graduating.#which seems like an uneven comparison but honestly ive just been so so so scared of this driving test#an insurmountable obstacle bc i was stuck at school away from family to help me practice etc etc#very tied up with me being stuck at school for so long actually. the neverending purgatory of being Stuck In Place.#but my cousin lives closer to me now and hes been helping me out. and i am so very grateful.#augh augh augh augh. life is so busy and it feels like everything is happening at once AAAAAAAAAAAA#but im taking it all in stride. i am. oh god i might have to just practice and then take my audition video all on the same day.#bc i am too tired to deal with it rn and i have an exam tomorrow so idk if i can practice then. also i have to clean.#i will make it work. i will make something work. for the love of fucking god i will make it work.#no time to write barely any time to relax but thats okay i am Go Go Going and trying to keep enough time to sleep#(prior few nights being the..exception lol.)#i certainly wouldnt want to live this way for too long. but just a few more months. i can do it.#next semester hopefully wont be as busy. i'll have 3 hard classes but if im lucky they wont even have much homework.#i can do it. i can get through it. i will get my license in 3 weeks (manifesting) and i will get my own car.#i will find a new apartment to live in. i will Hopefully find a job.#within a year my life is going to be much much different.#my life is Already much much different than it was just a year ago. tho this year has been more... metamorphosis.#in a year's time. i will be 28 years old. and the pieces will Finally be falling into place (hopefully!!!!!)#for now. god i need to rest. will probably go to sleep early tonight. need to be rested for my exam tomorrow.#first tho i gotta shower and feed both me and the cats. yes.
3 notes
·
View notes