#transmute my physical form

[chilidogloverr]

It's not enough that I named myself after Amy Rose when I transitioned. I need to actually be her I think

[astrologydray]

Ruler of the 12th through the houses

ruler of the 12th house through the houses, one of the most spiritually potent placements in the chart. The ruler of your 12th house shows where your deepest healing and spiritual evolution wants to unfold. This is the house of your spirit guides, hidden superpowers, and private battles.

12th House Ruler in the 1st House

You carry the unseen with you.

You’re intuitive, psychic, and sensitive AF. You may appear dreamy, ethereal, or mysterious — because you embody 12th house themes. Your subconscious is part of your identity. Gift: Healing presence, spiritual aura, psychic instincts. Identity confusion, absorbing others’ energy. “I walk between worlds.”

12th House Ruler in the 2nd House

You ground the spiritual into the material.

You may channel your intuition into building wealth, creating art, or healing others through touch and presence. You could inherit spiritual gifts or generational patterns around survival. Gift: Sacred sensuality, money magic, value-based intuition. Feeling unsafe to be seen or trust in abundance “I make the invisible, tangible.”

12th House Ruler in the 3rd House

You channel from the divine mind.

You may receive messages through dreams, downloads, or synchronicities. Writing, speaking, or teaching may be spiritually healing — but you may keep much of your voice hidden. Gift: Dreamy writer, intuitive communicator, psychic translator. Mental fog, confusion, or escapist thinking. “I speak what spirit whispers.”

12th House Ruler in the 4th House

Your roots hold your healing.

You may carry ancestral trauma — but also incredible generational gifts. Your inner world is deep, private, and spiritually charged. Home is a sacred temple or a portal for healing. Gift: Ancestral wisdom, deep emotional intuition. Emotional isolation, fear of being known. “My soul remembers where I came from.”

12th House Ruler in the 5th House

You create from the soul.

Your art, love life, and inner child are deeply connected to your spiritual path. You may be a secret romantic, or use creativity to process emotions you can’t express directly. Gift: Healing through art, sacred sexuality, divine play. Self-sabotage in love, fear of being fully seen. “I create to remember who I really am.”

12th House Ruler in the 6th House

You turn the sacred into ritual.

You have the power to channel divine energy into your daily life — whether through healing work, service, or wellness. Your body might reflect your spiritual/emotional state. Gift: Intuitive healer, spiritual discipline, energy worker. Illness linked to suppressed emotions, burnout. “My devotion is my medicine.”

12th House Ruler in the 7th House

Relationships are spiritual contracts.

You attract karmic partners — lovers or friends who help you awaken. You may lose yourself in others, or form soul bonds that force you to confront your subconscious wounds. Gift: Mirror healing, sacred union, emotional depth. Co-dependence, attracting unavailable or confusing partners. “Love teaches me how to heal myself.”

12th House Ruler in the 8th House

You are a shadow weaver.

You feel energy, emotions, and hidden truths deeply. Your spiritual work may involve death, trauma, sex, or psychology. You’re a natural mystic or medium. Gift: Deep psychic ability, power to transmute pain. Fear of your own power, emotional suppression. “I alchemize darkness into light.”

12th House Ruler in the 9th House

Your spirit seeks truth.

You’re drawn to mysticism, philosophy, and spiritual teachings. You may travel far (physically or mentally) to find yourself. Dreams and visions may be tied to past lives or higher knowledge. Gift: Spiritual teacher, cosmic explorer, wisdom-seeker. Escaping into ideas instead of healing emotion. “I remember through seeking.”

12th House Ruler in the 10th House

Your legacy is spiritual.

You may be called to do spiritual work publicly — or bring healing into leadership roles. You could have hidden talents that shape your career. Your reputation might come from what you’ve overcome. Gift: Public healer, creative mystic, compassionate leader. Fear of visibility, hiding your true calling. “My purpose is guided by something higher.”

12th House Ruler in the 11th House

You dream with the collective.

You’re tapped into the collective unconscious. You might manifest your dreams in quiet or indirect ways — or be part of online/spiritual communities that feel like home. Gift: Channel for collective energy, digital mystic, manifestor. Feeling disconnected or like an outsider. “My vision was planted in me for the future.”

12th House Ruler in the 12th House

You are the mystic.

You have strong psychic gifts, access to ancestral memory, and a deep spiritual life. You may crave solitude and need extra rest. Dreams, music, water, and art are sacred portals. Gift: Divine connection, healing presence, intuitive downloads. Isolation, victim mindset, hiding your magic. “I live between realms — and I came to heal.”

[yourstardarling]

Lilith Analysis

(Lady Lilith, by Dante Gabriel Rossetti)

In my perspective, Lilith symbolizes the female intuition which is often vilified in our patriarchal society. She questions the status quo, defying societal norms and forges her own path for how she lives her life. In some interpretations, Lilith is depicted as the serpent in the garden, tempting Eve with the apple as revenge for her expulsion after refusing to submit to Adam. Targeting Eve instead of Adam, shows how Lilith understands the curious nature within women to want to know more and what ifs. It is the same curiosity that made Pandora open the box releasing malicious spirits into the world.

The energy of Lilith is a vengeful one as she sought revenge against God for her banishment out of the garden. In her expulsion, she was stated to steal babies and harm innocent lives, unsympathetic to anyone in her way. So within our charts, Lilith shows where we've experienced profound shame and societal rejection. It is where we are often demonized for refusing to yield to others' expectations. If we don't heal this pain it often becomes a form of self-destruction, fueling a need to gain revenge, harming anyone in our path. This part of our chart is usually suppressed, relegated to the shadows, but integration of this energy is crucial. Mainly because keeping our shame underneath the surface will often cause self-sabotage within the house Lillith is in. Finding the underlying root of the problem will often lead to reclaiming of your power, making Lilith be an energy of magnetization and authority. Neglection will only exacerbate internal conflict.

Lilith in the 1st:In the first house, these individuals are the walking embodiments of Lilith. They are often faced with deep-seated feelings of shame regarding their sexuality and physical appearance. Many have endured the pain of bullying in their youth, which has made them feel shunned out from society. This shame becomes a heavy burden that feels as if it is a part of them, complicating efforts to express their true self openly. Consequently, a portion of their identity remains veiled, guarded against potential judgment or rejection from others. Yet, beneath this veil within their unconscious, lies a potent magnetism. A profound sense of sexuality that others find rather attractive or unsettling. They find themselves both desired and feared. But honestly like Britney said it’s because, "All of the boys and all of the girls want to if you seek Amy." Lilith's influence in this house encourages independence and self-assertion. It teaches the importance of standing firm in the face of societal pressures and refusing to be demonized for your own authenticity. However, yielding to criticism and seeking external validation risks facing internal conflicts. A constant battle against yourself. That is why confronting the shadow aspects of one's personality should be practiced, as it offers a pathway to self-discovery and empowerment. When you are able to show resilience and unwavering faith in yourself, you're able to garner admiration and respect from those around you. The ability to transmute pain into productive actions serves as a magnetic force, attracting allies and opportunities alike. Learning to embrace your inner sexual energy is imperative, as it is something that cannot be suppressed. Unfortunately, this embracement may invite unwanted attention, leaving you vulnerable to exploitation and trauma. Overall, the role of Lilith in the first house is one of self-acceptance and defiance against societal norms. It's a journey marked by challenges, but also by profound personal growth and authenticity.

Lilith in the 2nd: In the house of personal gains, Lilith has felt great shame surrounding her personal values. Individuals with this placement have a hard time surrounding their self worth and physical assets. Possessive tendencies lie beneath the surface, as a consequence from being betrayed in the past. People may have taken advantage of them for their material value and stolen from them. Financial wounds run deep making them unable to properly trust themselves with money. Might find themselves in cycles of reckless spending, prioritizing instant gratification over long term investments. The types go on a shopping spree and then feel guilty for indulging materialistically.These people can either be overindulgent or extremely picky when it comes to what they spend. There is an inherent value of pleasure and spending resources on things that make you feel good.The sign Lilith is in will give you an idea on what you unwarily spend money on and guide your financial decisions. Implementing a budget plan can be very beneficial in uncovering and healing shame surrounding your spending habits. It will help you regulate your spending. Underlying shadow challenges when it comes to self worth is another aspect of this placement. Leading to having doubts about deservingness and attaining success. Lilith in the 2nd, prompts a reevaluation of your values. Rather than being overly picky, you're encouraged to be intentional in your pursuits. Learn to align your investments with your deepest values and aspirations. Family dynamics may also contribute to your relationship with money, with the possibility of past generations engaging in questionable financial practices. Additionally, Lilith's immature aspects may tempt individuals to resort to unethical means of acquiring wealth, such as engaging in sex work or participating in illicit activities. However, succumbing to these temptations risks exploiting others and ultimately perpetuating cycles of harm. In navigating the influence of Lilith in the 2nd house, you are urged to exercise caution and integrity in financial dealings. By confronting shadows and cultivating a sense of self-worth, they can transcend shame and reclaim power over their financial well-being.

Lilith in the 3rd: When Lilith is in the third house of youth and mental stimulation, these individuals have deep shame within their speech and communication. Oftentimes they were demonized as a child, facing constant scrutiny about their childish behavior. Parental guardians made them seem like they were to blame for the smallest issues that occurred. In school they may have felt shunned out from their peers, becoming the target of bullying and ridicule. This ridicule can even come from their teachers that overly criticized them for not being the perfect student, leading them to feel like they were a bad kid. Might indicate having a speech impediment, having a hard time communicating how you feel and issues surrounding being able to read. Your intelligence was significantly downplayed from the earlier years of school which made you believe you were dumb. For this reason, you may prefer being quiet and only speaking when you are needed to, often avoiding starting conversation. To others you may seem standoffish when you speak, but instead it can be anxiety to say what you really want because of public reaction. This Lilith wound is one centered around your inner child and taking back power over your mind. Intrusive thoughts of feeling less than can often be an underlying trigger, but you must recognize that these voices in your head are not your own. It is programming from the ridicule you received as a kid. Mindfulness and meditation practices can help regulate the outside input that comes in your head. You're a very intellectually capable individual that often understands knowledge about topics considered unconventional by society. Don’t be ashamed of what you know and use it to teach other people information you are passionate about.

Lilith in the 4th: Within the house of home and heritage, Lilith has wrested with feeling of shame for her family background. These individuals can often grow up feeling sexually repressed by their family. Criticism for what they were and being called a slut for wanting to express themselves. This placement reminds me of Meg from Family Guy, and how she is consistently made the butt of all ridicule by her family. As you went through puberty, you could've felt uncomfortable being objectified by family members. Some could've faced even faced exploitation by their own family. There is a strange focus on purity within the household and committing towards conservative ideals of presenting yourself. From their point of view, you may be seen as someone who is promiscuous and disobeying traditional values. You might find it hard to feel at home within yourself because of these past afflictions. This can even lead to you feeling ashamed about your emotional responses, often viewing them as evil instead of necessary feelings. Aside from sexuality, this Lilith placement also indicates having shame regarding your origin. There might have been concealed truths about your birth, unraveling as you mature. Might have felt like your family were strangers and you did not belong with them. Issues with the mother figure can be highlighted by this placement. You don't get along well and could feel a sense of cruelty from her. A shadow side to you is kept veiled from your family, which makes you feel like an outsider by them. You may have a reputation of being the rebellious cousin. They may harbor outdated ideologies such as racism, homophobia and xenophobia, that makes you more ashamed of them. The home you grew up in may have been the cause of this shame too, because of its design or infestation issues. Overall, stepping away from your family's point of view of the world is a big factor with this Lilith placement. You cannot allow their lives to dictate who you are meant to be. Learning to nurture yourself and finding your own community is an essential part of your journey. As time pass, you may discover yourself becoming a space for other people to confide in about their personal issues. A testament to Lilith making a home for herself outside the boundaries of Eden.

Lilith in the 5th: In the fifth house, individuals have grappled with profound shame surrounding the way they experience pleasure within their lives. Their childhood may have been faced with restrictions on the ways they could have fun, such as engaging in hobbies solely to appease their parents rather than for personal enjoyment. Activities you found enjoyment in, felt like you needed to keep hidden away from other people in order to not get ridiculed. There are plenty of hobbies you enjoy that others will find unorthodox to have. For example, going to shooting ranges, participating in drag shows, taking part in the circus or cosplaying your favorite characters. When it comes to your talents, you might face envy from others because they want the attributes that you have. May face hate in your extracurricular activities and being outcasted by team members. In your own eyes, your often unsure about your talents and feel like you're not good enough in your practice. Additionally, there is also shame regarding sexual pleasure. You might find it fun to explore, but some experiences make it unsettling for you to enjoy. There may be a need to keep your sex life a secret from other people. However, sex positivity can be a notable aspect of this placement though, not having much conservative notions in your sexual experiences. When it comes to children, you might feel some shame for not wanting to have kids and face scrutiny from others for this stance. You can even feel like you hate the thought of children and not wanting them around you. If you do end up having kids, they can exhibit Lilith quality traits of rebellion and unorthodox behavior. There is definitely a shadow side to how you gain pleasure with this placement, indulging in self destructive behaviors and selling yourself away for fun. You must learn to tame that primal urge within you when you are having a great time. Especially as this can lead to addictions to pleasure, such as having a gambling, drug abuse and being overly sexual. Learn to set boundaries when you're having fun.

Lilith In the 6th: In the house of service, Lilith plays a commanding role within her work space. This placement reminds me of The Devil wears Prada, where Miranda was seen as a formidable figure by her colleagues. Similarly, coworkers may harbor similar feelings toward you, casting you as assertive & harsh. You may face a lot of scrutiny in the workplace and could even work in an environment where there's a prevalence of discrimination. Workplace harassment can occur here as well, oftentimes facing oversexualization. Navigating and accepting your shadow persona in the workplace becomes essential. As long as you come there to do your job, that’s all that matters. Just try not to lash out at your colleagues because of misconception and other issues. There may be a big rumor that you are lazy for not doing as much as everyone else. However, you're the type of person that only comes and does the work that is necessary, not overworking themselves as everyone else. On the flip side, you can be hyper focused on work and do a lot more in your day that others don’t really see. This can take a toll on your health and work stress can be a big indication of this placement. Speaking of health, you might have a terrible relationship with health officials. Health experts in the past might have treated you poorly and even faced a misdiagnosis. Your relationship with health overall is something you can feel intense emotions around. A health condition could make you feel like you don’t have the same capabilities as other people. Might struggle with digestion and eating food to nourish yourself. There is a lot of necessary shadow work to uncover within your habits and daily routines with this placement. Learn to not be so hard on yourself, making time to properly maintain your physical needs.Health is wealth after all.

Lilith In the 7th: When Lilith lies in the house of partnerships, there is often shame surrounding the close connections these people have. They often easily attract people with Lilith energy in their lives, such as rebellion, ostracization and outcasts. You're often able to see the version of others that they keep hidden underneath. For some reason, people can feel like they can trust you with their problems and you make space to not judge them. Something about you just allows people to feel easily able to open up their shame to you. It might be because there is a part of you that has felt the same shame of being shunned out by other people. In your love life, there could be a tendency to feel outcasted by your partners which leads to having a warped perception of yourself. Partners often can make you feel like you are too much and incapable of being loved. May find it hard to feel their needs being met in their personal relationships. Here lilith indicates issues of being taken advantage of by other people and personal power being exploited. Aggressive aspects can also show facing abuse, which can make these individuals pretty guarded when meeting others. You could feel the need to be in control and have a dominant role in your love life. However, self-destructive tendencies may spur from not getting what you want out of a partner and lead you sabotaging your connections. You can often pursue relationships you know are unhealthy for you. There’s a tendency to want people that bring out an unhinged version of yourself, becoming a whole different person with a partner. Shadow work needs to be done as to why you chase these toxic connections, which sometimes is rooted from the way you viewed the partnership of your parents.

Lilith in the 8th: In the house of death and loss, Lilith is put to face the extremes. Each time they are in a transitional phase in their lives, they get kicked out of their paradise. These individuals understand the darker sides of life and are somewhat good at navigating their shadow. Shadow side can often take things to the extreme when they are out of control. Really good at understanding the taboo and being okay with things that are scarier for other people. A necessary need to make peace with inner demons and resolving past psychological conflicts. While they are able to easily exude a seductive persona, sex can be a harsh topic for them to feel comfortable with. Losing their virginity might have been a monumental experience that shifted the way they act in their lives. There is a need to work on resolving issues with sex and not being afraid of it . Also, you might be into some fetishes that you feel the need to keep hidden from other people. Hiding is a big coping mechanism for them, whenever they feel like the world rejects them, they bury themselves down in shadows to not be seen. A distinct relationship with death, some hold huge guilt for being unphased by death, while others worry about their own deaths. If a family member had died, you might feel guilty for not being sad or crying at the funeral. These people can mourn their innocence a lot, thinking of a time they were untouched by the world around them. During transitional phases of your life, you could be vilified and demonized for acting differently. Might have had a dark aesthetic or emo phase during your teen years. Change can be a scary thing for you and you could harbor strong resistance towards new possibilities. This mainly comes from the scrutiny you’ve felt by other people. Learn to embrace the taboo and understand change will only allow you to reclaim your power.

Lilith in the 9th: These individuals hold a complex relationship with religion and belief systems. Growing up, they likely experienced a religious environment that instilled fear and submission to authority. It's possible they had overly religious parents who prioritized adherence to faith, rather than showing genuine love and understanding for their children. As you mature, there's a tendency to reject traditional systems of beliefs for more esoteric philosophies, helping you find empowerment through alternative spiritual paths. Although shifting your beliefs will allow you to have a sense of freedom, remnants of past religious trauma still linger in your mind. Guilt for what you believe in is a big focus for this placement. They often find themselves at odds with mainstream perspectives, feeling a sense of alienation and struggling to fit in. There's a tendency to doubt their intelligence and the information they know. This struggle extends to academic pursuits as well, where they may feel out of place and struggle to connect with their peers. Moving away from their area of upbringing can be liberating, allowing them to explore their shadow aspects and embrace their darker side through travel and adventure. In doing so, they may discover a newfound magnetism and allure, attracting others to their path towards self-discovery.

Lilith in the 10th: In the house of public career, Lilith exerts a strong influence on one's outward image and persona. When in public settings, you often see people being easily magnetized towards you. If Lilith is conjunct the Midheaven (MC), it can signify experiences of unwanted attention, including catcalling. There's a deep-seated fear of being seen, stemming from the difference between your public persona and true self-image. Overexposure to the public eye can lead to discomfort, particularly in career fields where others seem to dominate or overshadow you. There is a natural ability to exude sensuality that others find intriguing. They may develop a reputation for sensuality and allure, which can intimidate others, particularly men, due to the inherent power they radiate. Despite the fantasization, they may resent the objectification and sexualization. In professional settings their bosses may even attempt to take advantage of them. This placement can also indicate stage fright and social anxiety, causing them to prefer the sidelines rather than the spotlight. An unbalanced version of this placement would be sabotaging yourself when it comes to your career. Promoting bad behavior so that you can gain the upper advantage in situations. It's crucial for them to be vigilant against exploitation by authority figures and to properly navigate professional relationships and contracts. Despite potential misconceptions about their character, individuals with this placement must embrace their authenticity and prioritize their own career aspirations over societal expectations. Your that b*tch for real, and you cannot allow the public opinion of you to dictate who you are. Also, Lilith in the 10th house may signify a challenging relationship with their father, involving absence, mistreatment, or attempts at control. This further fuels aspirations to become a successful person, in order to prove their farther wrong. Embracing their power and authenticity is important for success and fulfillment in the professional world.

Lilith in the 11th: Friendships are never easy with Lilith in the 11th. Despite outward display of support, these individuals frequently encounter betrayal from those they consider close allies, discovering that supposed friends harbor secret animosity and ulterior motives towards them. Friends could make jokes about insecurities you have, while accusing you of being soft for finding offence. Your secrets are not the safest within your social networks, they are like blind items ready to spill all the tea about your personal life. This atmosphere of distrust can lead to a cautious approach to forming friendships, resulting in a preference for family and romantic relationships over the unpredictability of friendships. Despite these challenges, individuals with this placement often gravitate towards unconventional or marginalized groups of people. Finding companionship in the outcasts who defy societal norms. They may become strong advocates for the rights and liberation of marginalized groups, focusing on the need for women's rights and the empowerment of societal underdogs. So while friendships may be met with much difficulty, these individuals create meaningful connections with fellow non-conformists in society. Finding solidarity in their shared struggles, leading to finding community outside of Eden.

Lilith in the 12th: Individuals with Lilith in the 12th house tend to keep Lilith's energy to the depths of their subconscious mind. They are often unaware of its magnetic, rebellious, and sexually charged nature. May doubt their own sexuality and seductive capabilities, feeling overshadowed by others charm. However, when in solitude, Lilith emerges to confront them about their inner shadows and demons. This often leads to solitary battles with their deepest fears and insecurities. Sleep issues are common with this placement, as they may struggle to maintain a stable sleep routine. May prefer the quiet solitude of the night for introspection and self-discovery. In their dreams, they often confront scenarios designed to evoke feelings of inadequacy and shame, forcing them to confront their inner vulnerabilities. They can be drawn towards dream working, meditation, shifting and exploring unique ways to access their subconscious mind. By using the arts, they can transmute fears and underlying issues in their mind to a reservoir of creativity. You can often see their shadow portrayed boldly in their art. Also, these individuals are often empathetic and hold nonjudgmental view towards the shadows of other people. Overall, through uncovering their darkness, Lilith in the 12th house can lead to spiritual growth and artistic development when integrated unapologetically.

____

Remember to look at the aspects to Lilith in your chart. Since it is an astrological point & asteroid, it doesn't hold as much significance compared to the planets. So aspects allow you to know how much of this energy can be brought up to the surface. Also, this reading is for all versions of Lilith in the chart.

-your Star Darling

(Portrait of Simonetta Vespucci, by Piero Di Cosimo)

[lostwords-found]

Oh no. Oh fuck. I am relistening to some of the earlier Protocol episodes, and I have a horrible, terrible, no good very bad suspicion about Gerry.

I could, I want to emphasize, be completely wrong! I could be wildly, hilariously, off the mark. But--hear me out. This is going to take some explaining about what I think is going on in the bigger picture worldbuilding stuff; hopefully it'll be coherent, but fair warning, it may get a bit long.

First: there have been a lot of cases that have boiled down to trying to keep only the "good"/desirable/etc aspects of things or events or people, and discard the "bad"/unwanted, right? We saw this happening very explicitly in episode 23 with Alesis Newman, and way back in episode 2 with Daria the painter, but a number of episodes have presented variations on a similar theme.

Two variations in particular that I've been thinking a lot about are the violinist in episode 4 and the gambler in episode 9. The violinist can play his violin beautifully, but he wants to be rid of the price in flesh and blood that it demands. Similarly, the gambler wants the rewards of rolling high on his magic dice, but wants to be rid of the misfortunes that come with rolling low. Crucially, both episodes make clear that in this type of balance--something unwanted for something wanted--you can't just make the unwanted piece vanish. It has to go somewhere, it has to happen. But you can make it happen to someone else, somewhere else. And when that's how the game works, one of the major questions for players who want to get ahead then becomes: "how do I make the bad stuff stay happening somewhere else, and keep reaping the benefits of the good stuff that balances it out?"

Here's where this gets wildly speculative and from here on I freely acknowledge that I may be talking out my ass:

I think the Magnus Institute was investigating that question. I suspect a great many alchemists before the Institute, probably going back to the times of Albertus Magnus, were investigating it as well. I think the Great Work they were attempting -- the "universal transmutation" alluded to in episode 21 as the Magnus Institute's aim -- was the exact opposite of Jonah Magnus's own "Great Work" in TMA. In other words, I think they were probably trying to make the world an eternal paradise, rather than an eternal hell.

But if you're getting rid of all the "bad" stuff, all the suffering and misfortune, it's got to go somewhere.

I think they were sending it through to other worlds.

I'm not going to get into all the reasons I think that right now, because that's a whole essay in itself, but basically--the Leitners in TMA? The artifacts? All the little bits and pieces of evil given physical form, that never had a clear origin point in the world where they caused so much suffering for so long? We've all been worried about them winding up here, post-Archives... but I think this is where they came from in the first place. I think they were sent away in the hopes that an increase in "bad" in other worlds would lead to an increase in "good" in this one. Remember all those books Albrecht von Closen found in the tomb in the Black Forest in TMA, that Jonah Magnus later stole and let loose on the world? Remember that Albrecht found a mysterious coin along with them dated 1279? Albertus Magnus died in 1280; I strongly suspect he sent those books from the world of Protocol to that of Archives shortly before his death, much as the world of Archives sent the tapes away centuries later. But I think Protocol's world kept sending things away, kept trying to export "bad" and import "good". Remember all those happy, laughing volunteers bringing strange and sinister items to the charity shop on Hill Top Road in episode 7? "All for a good cause."

Okay so. Now. With that bit of hypothetical framework for Protocol's worldbuilding in place, let's next go back to Alesis Newman of episode 23. Her expressed wish is to create a new her. "Someone better. Someone the pain can't touch." Someone who can be everything Alesis wishes she could have been. Someone "free of all (her) mistakes."

But increasingly it sounds like what she actually wants isn't to create someone new. It is to create someone who is only a part of her current self. Someone who, she says in one of her last few posts, will "just be the good parts of me."

And if that's the case, if what she's really trying to do is make someone who holds only the "good" parts of her, someone who can be happy and strong and perfect and loved by everyone forever... what happens to the bad parts of Alesis Newman, as she currently exists? What about the parts of her that feel pain and fear, the parts of her that make mistakes, the parts of her that she rejects?

One might assume, from the experience she narrates, that those pieces of her are simply being destroyed. But that doesn't line up with the suggestion we've seen from earlier episodes that there has to be some kind of balance maintained in these bargains. What she actually says is happening to her--and what the forum members have apparently told her will happen, through this process--is that she and this "new her" are "becoming one... and then two."

I don't think the "bad" parts of Alesis Newman are dying. I think they're also going to become a "new her"--they're just going to go somewhere else, somewhere the new, happy, strong, perfect version of Alesis Newman never has to see them.

Still with me?

Okay.

Now let's talk about Gerry. Let's talk about the smiling, laughing, irrepressibly happy Gerry Keay we meet early in Protocol. Gerry who seems to have everything that the Gerry Keay of Archives was denied.

Gerry who underwent tests at the Magnus Institute as a child, and who, per the static over his and "Gee Gee's" words, holds a few more secrets about what went on there than he let on to Sam and Celia.

Back when I first heard Gerry's appearance in episode 8, it sure felt like a narrative gut punch: This is who he could have been in Archives, if not for the presence of the Fears. This is what Jon and Martin's final decision threatens to destroy--for this safe, happy version of Gerry, and for everyone else in his world.

I'm now suspecting it might be significantly worse than that. I think the Magnus Institute might have done to Gerry Keay something similar to what Alesis Newman later did to herself: made him New. Kept only the good parts--ensured a happy, comfortable, good life for him. In which case, all the bad stuff--all the parts of Gerry Keay that would ever have to suffer from bad luck, to feel pain and fear and misery...

...well. They'd have had to go... somewhere else, wouldn't they.

Which would suggest I had the causality the wrong way around the first time I heard Gerry's appearance in Protocol: maybe it's not "Gerry has a happy life in this world because he didn't have to suffer everything that the Gerry Keay of Archives did."

Maybe it's "Gerry in Archives had to suffer everything he did because Gerry in Protocol was made to always be happy."

[hazzabeeforlou]

Hey everyone; this post has been a long time coming. Most of you know I’ve been a ghost on here for a while, but recently I’ve felt the need to make my step back more official and give it a little closure. That of course led me down the rabbit hole of thinking over the past nine years of my life, and I realized yet again the impact this fandom, these boys, and this space has had on me, and I wanted to memorialize that.

Nearly nine years ago I suffered a traumatic physical emergency which stuttered my whole life course, and through the depressive year that followed I somehow stumbled upon Harry Styles. I had a normal tumblr back then, but by spring and summer of 2017 I had fallen down the Larry hole and become this. Alone and dealing with trauma and pain, I spent countless hours in this community writing fan fic, discovering my sexuality, unpacking religious trauma, working through issues and ideas I had never encountered and just… changing. I went back and looked at a couple of my fics recently, and I realized I never really wrote about “the boys;��� I used the boys to write about me. That’s the gift that fandom gives you, a template to draw out any poison in your soul, bind it to paper, and sip it slowly with others, and as it’s shared it transmutes to a tonic that heals you, maybe also heals them, somehow. I don’t really know how to tell people that the biggest force for change and recovery in my life over the past decade was a boyband fandom where everyone believes Harry Styles is married to Louis Tomlinson, but it’s true.

You all healed me. Every comment left on my fics, every kind ask sent, every mutual squealing with me in the tags. I’ve loved you all, I miss you all. I wish I had the time and energy to stay engaged still; truth is, I’ve pivoted to the career I never thought I’d get to have, and I have it now, because of you. I wouldn’t be where I am today without this space, without you all. I’m so thankful. I’m so sad to see this era of my life fading away, to feel myself care less and less with that excited, lovely gut feeling whenever a new picture of the boys pops up. I don’t know if I’ll write Larry fic again, but I hope so, someday. One thing is for sure, I’ll never stop believing they were or are in love. That is a formative revelation that changed how I saw life for the better.

I’ll not stop writing, either. I’m going to publish PITS, someday, in some iteration. I’m writing my own stories now, things I’ve wanted to imagine since high school. I’m still excited about the boys’ music, and I can’t wait for new albums to drop. I might pop in from time to time to watch the frantic excitement of my dashboard, to see the names of old friends from what now seems like a past life. Sometimes it hurts to turn the page and admit an era is over, but I think I’ve known for a long time now that my part of the story here is at an end. I hope you all keep enjoying the magic, the fun, the friendship, the Big Bang’s, the drama. And I’m not disappearing altogether, I’ll check in from time to time.

No need to reblog this or anything, but I want to hug and thank @twopoppies @metal-eye @chotime @whiteknightonasteed @evilovesyou @reminiscingintherain @roseandbee @unicornamy @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @indiaalphawhiskey @iamasphodelknox @old1ddude @pop-punklouis @phdmama @pfromb @ahotknife @strangenewfriends @definegirlfriends @freddiesmyqueen @golddustdyke @genuinemusic @justalittlelouislove @knightchanges @kindofsharethat @kingsofeverything @louisandthedagger @lululawrence @cathuniverse @cuethetommo @crinkle-eyed-boo @bulletprooflarry @becomeawendybird @briannamarguerite @nottooldforthisship @maleksrami @mediawhorefics @always-aqua @haztobegood @thewhitecitrus

I’m sure I’ve left off many more changed urls and lovely friends.

Wishing you all the best of life, love, and springtime.

Always,

Toni <3

[theeternalwomb]

Phases of the menstrual cycle broken down for divine feminine & divine masculine who are invested in a romantic connection:

Message: hello!, I'm very excited about this post, I've been working on it all day and felt called to talk about this because in a lot of divine feminines lives right now we're focusing on learning to alchemize and transmute energy and how to best prepare for our manifestations and make the proper decisions to keep ourselves in alignment BUT a good amount of divine feminines are also in the energy of seeking out an awakened masculine or cultivating good energies in their connections. This is a magnificent way to create further spiritually inclined connections in your relationships but also to move into the energy of enlightenment as individuals. I also will say that if you're mensurating be wary of physical sex on your cycle while actively bleeding as it can form soul ties, it's meant to solidify attachments and strengthen the ability to share energy in romantic connections. if you're a woman in general be wary of opening up and allowing anyone in your womb, please be discerning and choose wisely.

(There will also be a shortly summarized version on my Instagram for reposting and sharing purposes if you want to share this type of information with friends and loved ones who may not be on this platform! My Instagram: @theeternalwombtarot)

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phase one: The Menstrual cycle (days: 1-5) / "Winter" / The New Moon

physical symptoms: fatigue, cramps, bloating, headaches, lower back pain, and breast tenderness

emotional symptoms: low mood, irritability, fatigue, and emotional sensitivity

hormonal changes: low estrogen and progesterone, drop in hormones triggers menstruation

spiritual meaning: rest, release, and renewal. letting go, shedding what no longer serves you physically (biologically) and energetically, and preparing for new beginnings.

themes: reflection, introspection, purification & renewal.

spiritual practice & priority for divine feminine: meditation and grounding techniques, journaling, and rituals of release and healing. embrace and lean into intuition and release emotional baggage and limiting beliefs. embrace themes that come up to the surface to come out by acknowledging, surrendering control and worry, and seeking out new perspective and spiritual guidance. You're going to want to hone in and pay close attention to the body and emotional strain at this time to help you best navigate what needs to be put down or released. use the body at its most heightened to guide you in the direction of alignment and enlightenment. prioritize your happiness and peace.

divine masculines role at this time: further aid in themes of the menstrual cycle by creating an environment of rest, relaxation, and harmony. Study the woman and her needs and desires (both on an emotional and physical-biological human scale). Pour back into her through creating solace in her time of rest and relaxation. Attempt to control disturbing influences as much as possible to conserve divine feminines remaining energy left over and reserved for her rebirth and renewal. Move forward in the energy of compassion and service. Take on her needs and emotional state as if it were your own in order to be productive and fulfilling at this time. Move into the energy of compassion (to feel as she feels and to also feel sorrow for her and thus have desire to alleviate suffering and then do so.)

phase two: The Follicular Phase (days: 6-14) / "Spring" / Waxing Crescent

physical symptoms: increased mood, higher motivation, skin may begin to clear, light discharge

emotional symptoms: increased mood, higher motivation, increased creativity, mental clarity

hormonal changes: rising estrogen, FSH stimulate follicle growth in ovaries, and the uterine lining will begin to thicken to support a fertilized egg.

spiritual meaning: growth, new beginnings, and rising energy. Time for planting new seeds (like ideas, intentions, and projects) and feeling excited for and embracing growth.

themes: creativity, rebirth, expansion, and manifestation

spiritual practice & priority for divine feminine: this is a good time for divine feminine to set intentions, start new projects, and embrace creativity. visualization during meditation, affirmations, and rituals focused on manifestation is best for this phase. divine feminine should shift focus into project planning and pull from naturally flowing creative energies at this time and capitalize on both tapped and untapped talents to accelerate growth and expansion in her life. she should use her creativity, charm, and imagination to her advantage to bring forth abundance in the world around her and profit off of romanticism. Both in romanticizing her life and in her relationships and appealing to others.

divine masculines role at this time: increase romantic energy in the connection and work towards heightening close interpersonal intimacy through action and positive affirmation. The tongue, the mouth, and the throat chakra are powerful at this time. Plan dates, appeal heavily to the love language, and create unfaltering closeness with the woman. create heaven in her reality to better house her angelic and transformative energy at this time. Lean further into your spirituality as you become one with her during this phase through manifestation, prayer, and further acknowledgment of her divinity and connection to the divine. through your harmony with her from a genuine and aligned place, you too will prosper. You can tap into her natural flow of creativity and expansive energy and leverage your own intentions through required openness and respect for the feminine and the feminine cycle, mutual support, shared focus, mutual intentions, and rituals that honor both energies. (tantric sex or alike included.)

phase three: The Ovulation Phase (days: 14-16) / "Summer" / Full Moon

physical symptoms: increased libido, cervical mucus changes (clear & stretchy), mild to intense cramping to help the release of egg.

emotional symptoms: increased confidence, more sociable, higher libido

hormonal changes: luteinizing hormone (produced by the pituitary gland) surge triggers ovulation, high estrogen, brief rise in testosterone.

spiritual meaning: often linked to the peak of summer and the full moon. This period in the menstrual cycle represents abundance, fertility (both literally & metaphorically), and connection. Seen often as a time of heightened energy, power and creativity.

themes: fertility, creation, peak power, connection to others, and potential.

spiritual practice & priority for divine feminine: an ideal time for socializing, connecting with others, or performing rituals focused on abundance, fertility (i.e. sacred baths and cleansing rituals, sex and physical intimacy or tantric practices, spiritual and ancestral rituals, etc.) and gratitude. Many also use this time for creative expression and celebrating their accomplishments as manifestations can be both conceived and reaped and harvested at this time. Divine feminine should be focused on obtaining personal success and self-fulfillment and pleasure at this time. This is a good time for her to capitalize on personal power and energy and transmute passion into energy to move forward and obtain desires. The ovulation phase is a good time for networking and collaborating on projects and progress forward. She will work well in groups with partners or a partner and will excel in learning and implementing lessons and information.

divine masculines role at this time: The divine masculine's duty at this time is to pour into divine feminine through presence and attentiveness, affirmation and acknowledgment, emotional and physical connection creative collaboration and support, physical support and care, respect, and space for self-expression and celebration of her divine feminine energy. divine masculine can offer his full, undivided attention and listen closely to divine feminines needs, desires, and dreams. being present in a time of high intuition and peak power allows him to further honor her wisdom and creativity but also move in the energy of co-creation and further manifestation for his life. spend quality time with divine feminine at this time and prioritize her and her energy. This is also a good time for divine masculine to encourage and provide access to self-care rituals whether they be a paid service or things he does himself. this is a good time for divine masculine to move forward in the emotional and physical realms through his connection to divine feminine much like his ability to co-create or bring prosperity to his life during the follicular phase. He should move forward in the energy of leadership, confidence, and assertiveness in both physical and emotional realms. passion and intimacy with the woman is heavy and significant at this time, pour into her and strengthen thyself. strengthen your outside support by moving in a similar energy by balancing strength and empathy while being open and flexible to others needs and addressing those needs and providing necessary output. Take divine feminine to events and environments where her sociable demeanor can bring you more money, partnerships, and support. Let her be the face of your power and influence. Flaunt, flaunt, flaunt. Show off and prioritize the feminine. Your prize is in your possession. Your sigil is within her. Let her double the success you share, multiply it, and bring it back home with the both of you. Your good luck charm and prosperity token is within the divine feminine. Carry her around in your pocket or leave her at home on the altar you built for her to relax and flourish.

phase four: The luteal phase (days: 16-28) / "Autumn" / Waning Moon

physical symptoms: bloating, mood swings, breast tenderness, fatigue, increased appetite, acne, irritability (PMS and PMDD symptoms)

emotional symptoms: irritability, mood swings, anxiety, sensitivity, depression, craving comfort

hormonal changes: high progesterone, estrogen decreases, hormone levels drop if pregnancy occurs.

spiritual meaning: it's a time of slowing down, turning inwards, and preparing for rest. It's a phase of reflection, harvesting lessons, and preparing for the upcoming menstrual cycle.

themes: harvest, reflection, inner work, slowing down, and transformation

spiritual practice & priority for divine feminine: this phase is ideal for introspection and releasing what no longer serves you much like the entirety of the menstrual cycle itself. grounding practices like yoga, journaling, shadow work and meditation are common spiritual practices at this time. Bask in all three elements in your top three or allow for those elements to be prominent in spaces of relaxation. This is a good time to assess accomplishments and plan for the future. Your job at this time and area of priority divine feminine should be focused on clear boundaries and clear communication and working through mental and emotional blockages that create disruption in your life and emotional body through inner work. We want to try our best to see through the lens of heightened emotion clearly as often times fear and anxiety based distortion is present within us during the luteal phase. Ask yourself what your frustration, fear, sadness, or other complex emotions right now mean to you, what is your body or intuition trying to tell you, and what do you need to communicate to others effectively to further yourself or obtain peace? Get clear and work through illusions and deception. A time like this beckons emotional warfare out of you, your perseverance is needed. prepare yourself and move in the energy of transformation and transition. Baggage will be shed and released throughout the menstrual cycle.

divine masculines role at this time: At this time divine masculine must ready himself to opposite the divine feminines energy to be proactive and create the ideal environment for rest and rebirth. Do your due diligence to create the safest, most abundant environment in all ways necessary. similar to how the male in nature may help build a nest and sing to create a soothing environment or may take over and build the nest entirely on his own to prepare for incoming change and laboring. invest both financially, spiritually, and energetically into creating the optimal environment. your job during the luteal phase is to curate a safe space, your job as divine feminines hard work begins and the menstrual cycle starts is to keep her warm and tend to her in the safe space you built and brought the resources to.

****

notes:

divine feminine if you are single take into consideration beginning to period track whether it be with a calendar or with an app while you're looking for a divine masculine or are in a position where you're looking for love. this way you already know and have known for quite a while when phases of your cycle begin and what takes place during these times.

another thing I really think is interesting is research on what foods are best eaten through different phases of the menstrual cycle, this can also help divine masculine better prepare for your cycle during the luteal phase while he gets things in order for you to enter a period of rest, there are various charts on these things on Pinterest, I could make another post about that specifically another time.

tantric sex practices or rituals or similar intentional intimacy practices could be really good to implement during high energetic phases of the menstrual cycle to help divine masculine tap into your energy that you're radiating and give him the privilege of co-creating a reality with you or aid in him further manifesting abundance in his life. (do be mindful of period sex and soul ties, if you do not intend for him to stay divine feminine keep this in mind.)

also do your job as a divine feminine to choose your partners wisely as his ability to do these things for you and move with you through these phases of your life are incredibly important especially in states of high power or even energetic vulnerability, I touched briefly on how important it is that divine feminine invest her time in relationships that are emotionally and spiritually safe as you are wide open if you make the wrong choice or give your power away.

[bonesy-doodles]

TELL US ALL OF YOUR GHOUL HEADCANONS ‼️🙏💕

I mean, you asked for this!!! This is probably not all of my headcanons, just the ones I could remember off the top of my head, as this is all still a work in progress for me!

I will also include the Ghouls pictures again so people can refer back their designs cause I do touch on design choices for them as they, to me, are included in headcanons as every makes their ghouls unique on some way.

Okay, first up!

DEWDROP!!

There’s a lot for this man. So, Dewdrop used to be a water ghoul, however he’s not a multighoul like Swiss, Sunshine and Aurora because his element was transmuted during the binding ritual when he was passed from Terzo to Copia. So, my brain thought “what is water-like fire” and it landed on magma! So that’s why he looks volcanic. His gills closed over and became lava cracks, his fish scales became reptilian, and now he runs hot like a furnace. His ears are pointed like fire ghouls, but have points kinda like fish fins still. Dew also has fire manipulation and can essentially ignite fires (commits minor arson constantly) but that’s how he lights his cigarettes. He still has retained a great lung capacity and can hold his breath long enough to almost rival Rain’s infinite breath. The biggest trouble maker of the Ghouls and the worst influence on newer ghouls (i.e Phantom). He’s the shortest of the dudes, but makes up for it by setting you on fire if you make short jokes.

Also!!! I am a defender of the dark-hair Dewdrop design!! I know it’s very common for him to have blonde or white hair, but it was just not giving for this design. I tried, I promise! (I’m glad I’ve been seeing people love it though! My agenda is spreading!)

For fire ghoul visuals, I definitely focused on emulating glowing flame visuals, using red, orange, yellow, and white to give that effect with browns and blacks to make them look crispy. Scales and long pointed ears that go upward are also common for fire ghouls.

PHANTOM

Quintessence Ghouls are basically space and/or ghostly types of ghouls, as quintessence to me is everything between the elements and makes up everything (like stardust!!) Phantom, as a Quintessence ghoul can “see beyond the elements” with what I call aura reading at the moment, like seeing vibes and emotions. They can also float! Or slow their falls essentially. Not really fly like air ghouls. Phantom is actually, to me, one of the three most chaotic ghouls, alongside Dew and Swiss, and causes a lot of chaos at the Ministry. My favorite joke with my two wives who I discuss all this lore with often is that Phantom once pissed in the Unholy Water Bowl in the West Chapel right before a midnight mass, which caused a lot of problems for the Ghoul Den Overseer. Just to illustrate the shit Phantom pulls at the Ministry.

But specifically for Phantoms visuals, he reminds me of the moon, the tone of gray, his swirling vitiligo-esc patches. He has really dark eyes which is not very common for Quintessence ghouls.

AETHER

The second tallest and most beefiest of all the Ghouls. I mean, have you seen the arms on that man!!!! Like Phantom, Aether has the aura reading ability and is the expert at floating and slowing his falls (it’s how he achieves all the wild jumps on stage, like dude gets air time). His freckles actually form constellations, and on his shoulder you can see the Big Dipper cause he’s a big guy (yes that’s the joke, that’s why I gave him the Big Dipper). Aether acts as one of the minders of the Ghoul Den, kind of like the exasperated dad of the group. Tries his best to fix the chaos the other Ghouls cause to lessen the work of the Ghoul Den Overseer, put out Dew’s fires, etc. Also a fuzzy guy, which is uncommon for Quintessence ghouls, like he’s so soft somehow.

For Quintessence Ghoul designs, I really wanted to focus on the space aspect. All of them have space freckles, and their horns all swirl in some way (Phantom and Auroras swirling physically, and Aethers have swirling grooves/markings on them). Also, their ears are bovine-like in someways, cause I’ve always categorized Aether as like a space cow in my head. Their color palettes usually veer towards magenta, purple, and indigo (cause those are my favorite colors and Quintessence ghouls are my favorite).

RAIN

As a water ghoul, Rain has gills, fins on various parts of his body, and webbed fingers and toes (it’s a bit freaky). Also, serrated teeth like a piranha. If you’ve ever touched a fish, that wet feeling of their scales is how it feels to touch him. He can breathe underwater with his gills and will often be found in the lakes on the Ministry’s grounds when he needs to chill. His tail is a bit thick than other ghouls, as well as finned to help with swimming. Also water manipulation abilities! (It’s giving Cleo from H2O). He’s also bioluminescent! His scales and the lighter markings on him all glow

He does participate in problem causing sometimes, but is also exasperated mom of the group (cue his disappointed mom pose of hands on hips). Aether and Rain are the duo that hold Dew up by his arms while he’s trying to sprint towards trouble. Rain often has his hair pulled back in pony tails, or braided as he has a lot of hair, and it’s gets in the way while he’s swimming.

Water ghouls in general have everything above that I’ve already mentioned for Rain, all the fish like aspects. They tend to be blue toned and have a variety of scale coloration, often green, blue and purple in tones (duochrome, iridescent, pearlescent, etc).

MOUNTAIN

Biggest of the Ghouls and third beefiest! He’s also fuzzy! Mountain has a connection with the earth (duh, all earth ghouls do), which allows them to feel the “heartbeat of the earth”, gives them that killer rhythm on the drums. He’s big into growing plants and taking care of the Ministry’s gardens, which he excels in as Earth ghouls also can affect plant growth as well as other earth things like soil. The flowers behind his ear in the art are actually Belladonna, also known as Deadly Nightshade!

Mountain also has two ways to shift himself, one being normal legs and his most natural ghoul state is hoofed/goat legs, which is why he doesn’t like wearing shoes (it’s a weird feeling). His horns are gigantic as Earth ghoul horns tend to be, and have a cracked earth/clay patterning (his very first design iteration had cracked clay skin, but I did not like how it looked). His coloration and markings are very deer like, along with his ears. Mountain is very quiet compared to the rest of the Ghouls, he gives cryptid energy while at the Ministry.

Earth ghouls in general tend to lean towards more green and brown tones, with the previously mentioned giant horns. They can also have a variety of mammal like variations to them, but the most common is forest animals like deer, beer, wolves, coyotes, etc. They tend to be the fluffiest of the ghouls, and also the biggest. It’s just natural for them to be tall.

SWISS

Being a multighoul of all elements, he basically is a shadow ghoul (mix all paint colors and you get dark brown/black was my idea). He’s the third tallest and the second beefiest ghoul. Swiss has shadow manipulation abilities and can kinda merge into the shadows, which he uses to sneak around, cause problems and prank people. Also as a multighoul of all elements, he can kind of emulate abilities of other elements, like him being able to hold his breathe underwater longer than natural, his singing voice is siren-like similar to air ghouls, etc. He’s also fuzzy!!

Also, Swiss is the biggest accessorizer and has the most piercings of all the ghouls. He likes how it gives him some pizzazz. Also has gifted every ghoul at least one set of jewelry they are ornamented with (thought it was funny to get Dew the upside cross earrings).

And Satanas, the shit this man gets up to. There is a reason he’s on his stage of shame most of the time. Swiss enables all of Dew’s chaos with a giant smile on his face. It’s like winding up a toy and letting it spin.

Little side note about Multighouls, there are only two all element Multighouls in the Ministry, one being Swiss, the other actually being Phil! The Special Ghoul! He was once seen playing several instruments, signifying his elemental range, but tends to keep to himself compared to Swiss.

AURORA

The newest multighoul, and second multighoulette! Aurora is dual elemental, Air and Quintessence which together makes her embody an Aurora Borealis (her name sake). With her two elements, she gets her skin coloration and patterning, eyes, and swirling horn from her Quintessence aspect. Her space freckles are a bit more on the bluer side due to the air aspect however, as well as her second set of horns as air ghouls often have two sets of horns or two pronged horns. Her ears are bovine and bat-like. She has smaller wings compared to a full air ghoul, but her floating ability also helps. It’s a very interesting combo to watch. Also, her hair is just naturally like that, no hair dye involved. Don’t ask her how it changes color as it grows, she doesn’t know.

Aurora is probably the most energetic of the Ghoulettes, and is besties with Swiss. Is constantly helping him get into shit. In general is an accomplice to Swiss and the Ghoulettes. She loves being involved in the shit they all pull. And despite her stature, as the shortest of all the Ghouls, she will body a bitch (the shorter you are the closer to hell you get)!

CUMULUS

The biggest, fluffiest hair. It’s so long and so much and it’s her pride and joy! It’s how she got the name Cumulus because of how much it reminded Copia of cumulus clouds. As an Air ghoul, Cumulus has large bat-like wings that allow her to fly. They can be folded and retracted if need be as they can get in the way. In the Ghoul Den, the Air Ghouls have a loft only accessible to those with wings, or if you tempt fate and get someone to throw you. Cumulus’s air ghoul horns formed in the shape of crescents, so she doesn’t have two sets, instead is categorized as two pronged.

As previously mentioned, Air ghouls have siren-like voices (referencing Greek myth sirens being bird women) and Cumulus is the epitome of this ability. Can get people to do her bidding just by whispering sweet words into their ears.

Cumulus and Cirrus are a duo, as they were summoned together and bonded over being Air Ghoulettes, if you see one of them, the other is not far away or far behind.

CIRRUS

The tallest of the Ghoulettes and somehow the chillest comparative to the others. She’s still a ghoul though, so the chaos scale is broken anyway. As previously mentioned, she is Cumulus’s other half and visually is opposite of her on many ways. Darker, straight hair which is uncommon for Air ghouls, along with darker eyes. She also has the biggest wing span of all the Air Ghouls, and is the fastest with Sunshine a close second. Her vocals are second to Cumulus’s however. Not nearly at the level of controlling, but she can still bring anyone to their knees if need be.

Truly, Cumulus and Cirrus are a power couple amongst the Ghouls because their siren abilities affect Ghouls as well, just to a lesser degree, so if need be (with a good enough bribe) they can put a pause on the chaos if it gets too out of hand. The bribe has to be really good like, they like watching shit get crazy.

SUNSHINE

Finally, Sunshine. The first multighoulette summoned, and her dual elements are Air and Fire. Her fire like appearance veered away from volcanic like Dew to being like Sun Spots (areas on the sun that are darker than the rest of it) and that’s why her scales are rounded compared to Dew’s. Her wings are also smaller like Aurora’s, still bat-like but also gives dragon because of the reptilian aspect of Fire ghouls. She does have two sets of horns which she likes to ornament like Swiss.

Sunshine and Aurora bond over being air based multighoulettes and also have joined the multighoul secret club with Swiss and Phil. What do they do there? Well, it’s a secret of course. It wouldn’t be a secret club otherwise!

Also, there have been several cases of arson that have been committed that were blamed on Dewdrop, but were actually done by Sunshine, but she’s a great liar and loves getting Dew in trouble. She like orchestrates that shit.

Now that I’ve touched upon all of the air ghouls, basically, air ghouls tend to be either teal or yellow in tone, usually with cloud like markings (however Aurora and Sunshine’s dual elements change that). Their ears tend to be bat shaped, along with them sporting the large bat wings that give them the ability to fly. There have been cases, however, that air ghouls have feathered wings, the only known case being the first summoned keyboardist, aptly named Air. No one knows why he’s the only one, he just claims it’s cause he’s cool like that. Also mentioned the siren like voices, it’s not a universal Air ghoul ability, some more attuned with it than others, but it’s quite common seeing as all four Ghoulettes along with Swiss possess the ability to some degree (Air does not because he’s not cool like that).

GHOULS IN GENERAL

Kind of wanted to go into some general stuff for the ghouls within the Ministry and the Summoning process.

When a Ghoul is summoned by a Papa (the only person really sanctioned to summon ghouls with some exceptions of course), they are bound to that Papa, with some sort of mark to signify this binding. For the Papas, they each use their individual grucifixes as this marking (Copia’s ghouls were for a while marked with the basic Grucifix because he was initially a Cardinal. Technically, during that Era, the Ghouls should have been bound to Nihil, however Sister Imperator pulled the exception card for her little Cardi. Once Copia became Papa, the binding ritual was redone to remark them with his new grucifix). All of the ghouls do have grucifixes essentially tattooed onto their body in different locations, but there’s a lot of development for that and some still undecided so that can’t wait until I’ve drawn full bodies for all the ghouls.

Also, mentioned a few times in this was the Ghoul Den Overseer, who is actually a Sibling of Sin character of mine (because I over indulge myself and this is my lore interpretation anyway, I do what I want). Their “confirmation” name (christened? Sataned?) is Rigoria/Rigorian, last name Mortuous. Yes, it’s a play on Rigor Mortis but my name is literally Bones. I will be drawing them as well at some point so I can show you guys my interpretation of the Siblings of Sins in different Papal Eras.

[nuggetofthesea]

The DIY Dragon:

Story by Aqua Celeste. Part of the "Animal HRT" and "Wake Up and Start" Universes.

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The Animal HRT has been widespread for months now. Appointments have been on an all time rise with the dark witch herself having given copies of her notes to a few different doctors. But Iris can't be expected to give her magic to all of them, so others needed to be able to study the notes and use it to figure out their own magic. Usually by the end of a few months, most have been replaced from her energy signature to another's. Iris may not be fond of people messing with her spells, but it is a different story to those she willingly gives her spell notes to.

Iris still has a magical connection to her note copies and the initial spells set off by them. Allowing her to use her teleportation magic, that targets any item imbued with her magical energy, and allows her to move instantly to it's location. So it should come as no surprise, that she found out about an undocumented use of her notes. A Dragon. No real threat, as Iris found out when keeping an eye on her.

This dragon was making DIY animal HRT using her notes. But how did she obtain them?

"I don't know how she got them. Her energy from this distance doesn't seem malicious. But her methods are definitely based on my notes." Iris told herself from her tower. A look of genuine curiosity formed on her face, which showed as a sly smile as she placed her hand up to her face. Her eye focused on the direction of the dragon and her energy. "Will be nice to see another dragon so soon. But I can't shake the feeling they aren't being responsible with the learning process."

"Are you going to check up on her, then?" Someone asked from seemingly nowhere. No physical body in sight, and only audible to the dark witch herself.

"Oh, of course I am. I know we are busy, Ashe. But I do need to make sure she isn't in any danger. Wouldn't do to have my spells bootlegged and distributed without any proper monitoring." Iris Responded to the voice, now clear it was coming from inside her head.

It was the voice of Ashe (She/They). Girlfriend she shares her body with in the most literal sense. As stated previously, Iris' body is host to 6 distinct people. Ashe was one of them. Previously the body's original host. She is a shapeshifter, a fact which Iris uses to take on any form she desires as well. Including the others in her head having their own forms.

"I'll just pop over. After all, that still has my energy signature. I should be able to head there any time. Should be done before you have to go to the studio." She looked to a small rack of what appeared to be miniature magic staffs on a shelf beside her and pulled up one with a gem sitting in a feathered crescent moon. Mostly black and purple in color. "This one should do for this outfit today." She said as she began to concentrate on the small, pocket sized staff. A small glow began to surround the tiny stick as it began rapidly growing in size. Becoming a full sized magic staff.

"Nova! I'm heading out! You and Nero watch the tower! And if that Magic Commission officer shows up again, I give you permission to "play" with them."

"For real? Ah yer spoiling me, Witch. Now I'm hopin they show up!" A voice called back, belonging to a small orange Fae creature named Nova (They/It/Fae). Appearing from hiding just as suddenly as their voice appeared. "Will watch over the tower then. Cannae let an opportunity like that pass by."

With that, in a flash, Iris was gone. Leaving only the Fae, and a smaller creature next to it.

Meanwhile, in the building where Iris's energy was currently being used, a red dragon named Dia (She/Her) seems to have finished a DIY cat HRT made using samples transmuted from other samples.

"Hey! I did it!" She exclaimed, holding the small bottle in her claws.

"It would appear so." A soft voice spoke from behind her.

Dia turned around quickly to find the source of the voice only to see Iris leaning against a wall in the back of the room, looking at the dragon's notebook and comparing notes.

"What!? Who are you!? How did you even get in here?"

"So you've been using my notes without knowing who wrote them, huh?"

The stare in her glowing yellow eyes looking less interested in answering Dia's questions first. Iris didn't take her eyes off the notebook in her hands.

"Your notes? HEY! Give that back! I worked hard on that!"

"I can tell. And I got to say, I'm impressed. Most people don't seek to understand how my spells work, just end up following the directions directly. Not you though. You are seeking to understand it. Experiment with it. Here." Iris says calmly handing the book back to Dia. The glow of her eye now seemingly piercing as she looked up to the Dragon's eyes.

"I'll start. I'm Iris. I got in by teleporting here using the magic signature attached to my spells. I am the writer of the notes you seem to have stolen and want to know where you got them, and how?"

Hearing this, Dia's eyes widened. "You're the one…" She started, before freezing up. Why was she here? Was she here to take away what she has made? To shut her down? Maybe report her to some sort of Magic council made to keep this magic under control? These thoughts kept racing in her mind as she tried to regain control of the situation. She took a deep breath and began to speak again.

"I got the notes from Dr. Erian. He denied me treatment, and I found the notes in his desk and took a picture of them." She calmly explained. Knowing those initial ones were Iris' notes, so she was prepared to face the consequences.

"All that from one page of my notes, and you've already progressed this far without the rest of the research contained within? Yes. You'll definitely make for a good apprentice." Iris responded. Much to the surprise of Dia, who didn't know what to make of that comment.

"You're… not here to stop me from doing this?" Dia questioned.

"Well at least stop you from proceeding in a dangerous and frankly reckless way as you have been." Iris answered back. Seeming much more relaxed.

"But you have already shown great potential, and control of your own energy. With proper training, you'll have your own magic under control in no time."

Dia just stood there stunned.

"You don't have to answer now. But I would seriously consider it. If not me, then someone who will. With what you are making though, not many would be willing to teach outside of the Hyper City Magic Commission, and let's just say we don't get along well, and they would try to take it away. Give it some thought, and you will see me again. Until then, see you later! 💜"

And with a flash as quick as she arrived, she was gone. Leaving the dragon to ponder what she had gotten herself into. Clearly, she was learning enough on her own to continue the way she was. Right?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Chapter End-

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

This one was really fun to write as usual. With special appearance of @diarana as the dragon in this story. (Go check out her work, it is amazing!)

Also as usual featuring @iristhedarkwitch and @darkmagenugget. 💙 (Go check out their works as well! Also amazing!)

[nayatarot777]

PSA For Those Who Don’t Understand That Shit Ain’t Always Sweet Out Here In This Spiritual/Tarot World

I’m not one of these “love and light” tarot readers/spiritualists. You’re going to hear shit about yourselves in my readings that you don’t like, if that’s what Spirit wants to come out. Idgaf if it’s based on personal topics, relationships, work, health in any aspect - a lot of us self-sabotage. A lot of us are in situations with people and environments due to our own doing (partially). I’m not the reader that’s going to enable your perpetual victim complex and tell you what you want to hear to protect your ego from seeing a side to yourself that you don’t like. I’m not one of those readers who help you to lack accountability over what you allow into your own life despite having the option to do better. Of course I’ll try to put it in a delicate way where I can, but if a difficult pill to swallow is presented in a reading, I’m going to point it out.

I’ll point out your control issues that I see (no matter how much you try to hide or deny them). I’ll point out where you’re betraying yourself, where you’re disrespecting yourself, and where you’re disrespecting another. If you want to focus on love and light, then by all means - do that. But that’s the reason why so many of you are still unstable and imbalanced with no idea of how to balance and ground yourself. You think any of us could exist without darkness and negativity (which isn’t always evil and “bad”)? You think that you can exist only paying attention to the good parts of you without the bad? Go ahead and see how that turns out for you.

So many of you wonder why your intuition is thwarted and why you feel like you can’t connect to your higher self or the spiritual world without a “middleman” (such as myself). It’s because you’re not ready for that. Because you’re not ready to explore darkness within yourself in order to clear out a lot of the bs that’s clouding your vision. Why do you think that so many people who are great intuitives go through some of the darkest manifestations of life itself? Major abuse, betrayal, childhood wounds, just complete chaos - and they STILL come out to be some of the strongest and well-balanced people you’ll ever meet. They’re people who are strong enough to transmute darkness into light. You’re not going to do that by ignoring shit that you don’t like. And the darkness is terrifying. Exploring space, the deep sea, or any type of unknown is terrifying. But what would society look like if not one of us decided to do that? Where would we be as a human race if people with courage didn’t venture into those spaces and bring back a bunch of knowledge for us to expand our consciousness with? We all owe doing that for ourselves. Not doing so is self-betrayal and stagnation.

Intuition is represented by the moon. Does the moon emit light? No. Mother Luna is a dark entity and she lives in the darkness - which is the core of everything. And if you’re a woman/a feminine, you’re doing yourself even more of a disservice. Because darkness is pure, feminine energy. We come from our mother’s dark ass wombs. This entire universe began as a dark ass body of space-and-time before it formed physical planetary bodies and light sources. Reject yourselves all you want, but you can’t complain that you’re out of whack energetically if you choose to do so. Or when what you’re manifesting doesn’t come through (which also stems from the darkness btw). Don’t reject the darkness but expect to be able to use it when it benefits you. Sounds like shit that masculines have done to the feminine for centuries, huh? And so many feminines are doing that same exact shit to themselves. It’s sad.

We’ve seen entire groups of people with weak egos follow the same path of rejecting darkness/femininity and we see how difficult they are as people to co-exist with: ignorant men who have egos as big as the sun because they don’t want to face the hidden sides of themselves - that often times houses some ugly traits because of what they’ve allowed to fester in the dark corners of their psyche. Ignorant, male-centred religious people who identify so much with their religion that they only want to focus on the light, happy parts of their religion while ignoring how much harm that same religion can cause to others (especially feminines/women). Thats just to name a few. If you walk around with this idea that you’re nothing but “love and light” then just know that you’re another ignorant person in this world who is no doubt ignoring very real and human negative effects that you have on yourself and/or others - no doubt. And the darkness doesn’t always have negative effects (obviously) but it will when it’s suppressed and therefore forced to come out in uncontrolled, unconscious ways. If that’s what you want to do, then I’m not the reader for you.

[sillygoblinantics]

“Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou that’s not how trauma works, Lily Orchard”

This is the last Lily critical thing I am willing to share. For context: this happened during one of Lily orchards korra streams, it was before she would release her video that I would not watch for mental health reasons, but yes this is how her streams are, so much dead air only filled with obnoxiously loud keyboard clacking, snorts, and little to no commentary.

I had been watching, while watching I caught her talking about… trauma and ptsd. I caught her (if for a moment) fully displaying her lack of genuine empathy and knowledge of the aforementioned topics. And then when the show actually has a great point about how to healthily heal and how it isn’t going to be immediate she says:

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. That’s not how trauma works!

As if she would actually know and have studied and actually fucking know what it’s like.

This moment had broke me… if you’ve read my essay about my healing you’d know. This is not a criticism of Lily orchard… this is me showing her true colors. I need you to see how her brain works I want you to understand how it works without getting too close and touching the metaphorical poop of this drama until you get the full vivid picture of her.

Ever since I’ve learned more and more about Lily and have truly seen and heard of the things she’s done I’ve been plagued by what I thought were the traumatic moments I felt I had eloquently unpacked and picked apart… actually reanimate and take new forms that have caused minimal spirals.

And if I’m going through this then imagine what Lily orchards victims and fans have gone and continue to go through. This isn’t about whatever card she’ll use to get away with her behavior this is addressing the actual danger of this woman.

If I ever post her again I’ll be dropping art I did as cathartic release (like the below image):

Lily clearly uses her “trauma” to hurt others. She’s transformed it into a weapon that only damages those she hits with it.

Catharsis is the key to the freeing metamorphosis of your trauma tho it may remain it weighs less as you transform more and more of it in a new way.

That transmutation can be anything, art, animation, music, sculpture and visual or physical media really! Even in writing. It’s why I like creative nonfiction as it’s really just explorative essays. Like this post you’re reading now!

So.

To wrap this up, let’s quote the gifted goose’s own mouth:

“Fuck you, fuck you, Fuck You. That’s not how trauma works, you can tell they never had it”

— Lily Orchard August 2024

[aabluedragon]

About the Nature of Bloodfiends and Bloodthirst

CANTO VII SPOILERS BABYYYYY

In addition to my previous explanation of Bloodfiends with only information from Canto VII, I took the information I was reminded of in Murder on the WARP Express (episode 8) and presented it to my sister, who is wholly unfamiliar with the world of Project Moon for her perusal and she started cooking.

Establishing:

Blood is an analog to self actualization for Bloodfiends.

Bloodfiends seek blood because their instincts drive them to do so in favor of all other forms of fulfilment (see: La Manchaland and "happiness").

Therefore, they are de-incentivized from finding joy through anything else.

Becoming a Bloodfiend places a psychological block against seeking other forms of happiness.

There happens to be a River (or thirty) of an unknown source running underneath The City that blurs the line between mental and physical reality for beings that draw too close.

My sister's hypothesis:

Self actualization taken from blood is analogous to having a "soul" (proof of being alive/having the will to live).

By becoming a Bloodfiend, one loses their “soul” to the bloodstream/River due to the nature of their Primogenitor.

Therefore, Bloodfiends, who do not possess that “soul”, seek it through the act of blooddrinking from humans.

This process drains some amount of "soul" from the human, which is why direct blooddrinking always produces Bloodbags without exception.

This soullessness is also why Bloodbags will seek blood, they simply do not retain consciousness because they were never given blood (soul) in return by a Kindred.

Nosferatu/River/Light theory:

As established in Murder on the WARP Express, Bloodbags and Bloodfiends lose some form of physicality via the connection of blood to emotion, which are still plastic and transient on WARP trains. This transmutation is the method by which people "disappear" from WARP trains -- there is no physical body to reset after a person is fed on by a Bloodfiend and subsequently turned into a Bloodbag.

This transmutation is related to the origin of Bloodfiends, which I believe to be the River as presented in Lobotomy Corporation and Canto VI and the Light.

There are two lines of Bloodfiends that we know of, those descended from "a certain mansion" and those descended from the Blood Red Night.

I believe the Primogenitor of that "certain mansion" to be Nosferatu or a similar entity, an Abnormality created by the influence of the River rather than Cogito.

If the River is the source of the Primogenitor and where a Bloodfiend's sense of self and fulfilment departs for, it makes sense then that all Bloodfiends have a primal fear of water.

After all, to drink from the River instead of a human is to return your "soul" to yourself.

Ergo, Sancho’s fresh start after drinking from the River of Oblivion is untouched by bloodthirst despite Rocinante not repressing it, as observed by Vergilius.

The River and the Light

Going strictly by the nature of an Abnormality’s creation and how they can make sub-Abnos (see Melting Love goop in Lobotomy Corporation), Nosferatu the Abnormality passes on some of the metaphysical fuckery of the river to his Kindred, resulting in the bloodthirst and its consequences.

The bloodline of the Blood Red Night is tied to Distortion, a process of transformative hyper-individualism requiring the Light released from L Corp headquarters. However, I consider the Light to be an extracted and subsequently manufactured portion of the River like vanillin is to vanilla. If you wish to see more from me, feel free to leave a message. It's been a long time since I've been active on Tumblr and I've grown much since my early years. Cheers!

[magnus-marmot]

Needed a sideblog

Spoiler warning: You can generally expect spoilers for all of the Magnus Archives and however much of the Magnus Protocol is out at the time of writing. Each post will be tagged with "written after TMAGP[xx]" to give context for the general timeframe.

I have also started to tag posts with #tmagp salt, #tmagp mercury, #tmagp sulphur, #tmagp luna and #tmagp sol to mark which principles are relevant to the post.

Some of my working theories are summarised under the cut.

My original Tria Prima theory in a nutshell

(original post here, but the ideas are ever-changing)

The metaphysics of TMAGP aren't based on fears but on the three principles: Salt, Sulphur and Mercury. When balanced, it's business as usual. If unbalanced, weird things start to happen.

Salt 🜔 (Corpus, Body): The principle of stability, rigidity and stagnation. The physical, concrete body of a human or any matter. It's what remains after putrefaction. Vulnerable to corruption. Too much salt could lead to both literal and metaphorical stagnation, rigidity or crystallisation. Getting stuck or locked in place. Infectious corruptions, decomposition, death and preservation of bodies. TMA connections: Buried, Flesh, Corruption, End, maybe Dark (as per nigredo or the putrefying stage).

Mercury ☿ (Spiritus, Mind): The principle of volatility, solubility, dissolution, liminality and dualities. Water, air and things that flow. The human mind, or thoughts, knowledge, ideas and rationality. The collective unconscious that holds within it all concepts, ideas and collective feelings. Represents change and infinite possibilities. Too much mercury leads to general weirdness, confusion, physical and mental limits being blurred and dissolved, fluid transformations, people losing their identities and becoming mass. TMA connections: Spiral, Stranger, Vast, Lonely, Eye, parts of Web.

Sulphur 🜍 (Anima, Soul): The principle of combustion, burning (literally and figuratively), transformation and change. The consciousness that bridges mind and body. The emotions, feelings and passions, the driving force. Too much sulphur (or if sulphur corrupts), and it becomes an agent of destruction. Passions become obsessions, yearning becomes an insatiable hunger, people are driven to violence and destructive acts. Catalyses transmutations, actualises mercurial concepts into the physical reality. TMA connections: Hunt, Slaughter, Desolation, other parts of Web.

Additional forces: Sol and Luna

Not yet sure how these fit, but the symbolism is clearly present.

Sol ☉ (Sun, Gold, Celestial Niter): The active principle, associated with fire, light, reason, passion, the Animus archetype, and both the noble ideals and the destructive qualities of humanity. Governs over the heart. It's the source of life and growth, but also the source of destruction. Gold is the purest and most perfect metal, and discovering the solar fire within oneself is often the goal of spiritual alchemy. Also seen as the pure form of sulphur. Should be balanced by the forces of the moon lest it consume everything.

Luna ☽ (Moon, Silver, Celestial Salt): The passive principle, associated with water, coldness, reflectivity, darkness, secrets, motherhood, the Anima archetype, emotional needs and sensitivity, the unconscious, and the dark, suppressed thoughts and desires. Governs over the brain. Often seen as a mirror into the personal and collective unconscious. Silver is the pure form of mercury, and it needs to be unified with gold to produce the Philosopher's Stone. Personally, I associate Luna with the recurring themes of Hunger and internal voids that are reflected on the reality.

My model for DPHW

This model is still unfinished and quite possibly wrong, but it's the best I've got right now. I base this model on the quaternity in the middle of the OIAR logo:

D = Death/Tod ?? = Salt: A passive force, perhaps measuring the prevalence of physical remains where the volatile elements have been separated. This is still the biggest question mark in the theory.

P/S = Power/Stärke = Sol: An active ego-driven force that exposes secrets and makes people go mad with power or the need to be seen. (Kind of like a monkey's paw where you're actively making the wish.)

H/H = Hunger/Hunger = Luna: A receptive force, perhaps representing the personal unconscious, that manifests your inner/secret/unconscious thoughts into reality. (Like a monkey's paw where you don't even know you're making a wish.)

W/U = Weird/Unheimlich = Mercury: A liminal, omnipresent and intangible force that reacts to collective thoughts and dissolves boundaries between realities (including between material/immaterial). Represents the collective unconscious. (Like an AI that reflects its training data but in the most unsettling ways.)

The four Sulphur signs at the corners could symbolise the consciousness/perception of ordinary people, and how they affect each of the four variables by manifesting reality. (I'll have to thank @thanatos-zagreus-shagreus for this idea)

[stormy-nights-are-best]

The Deep Dive on Shadow Magic that you 🫵 asked for

I'm gonna try not to make this post too long so check out the ALT Image Descriptions for more insight.

I based my research on the principle that magic is integral to science and nature. So first of all, we should break down what a shadow is literally:

A shadow is a tear in the projection of a light caused by an Object (or individual).

1 shadow is always bound to 1 object. One object can produce several shadows at the same time (from several lights), but one shadow can't belong to two separate objects.

Shadows are 2D, but they exist in several planes.

Now let's break down each of these.

A shadow represents a soul. Belonging to a person, or something that's just real. That's why, sometimes, all a picture needs to look unsettling or dreamy is a shadow that either doesn't match the light's intensity or direction, or just isn't there.

That goes to say a shadow can't exist without its Object, but the human brain finds a shadowless body weirder than a bodyless shadow. Check it out:

This happens because a shadow is and always has been a sign that Someone Is There. A bodyless shadow still feels like somebody's, but a shadowless person doesn't even feel real. Old tales described faefolk and vampires as shadowless creatures for that reason.

If your shadow represents your soul, does that mean you're your shadow, and not your body?

Uh, no. Your shadow is an indicative that you have a soul, but you are not your shadow. Your shadow isn't a separate individual either. Let's look at the “Jungian Shadow”.

Literally speaking, from the perspective of the light, your shadow will always be hidden behind you, invisible, like in the first pictures of this post. The “Jungian Shadow”, named after psychologist Carl Jung (1875-1961), is the concept that your shadow is everything you hate and fear the most about yourself - it's the part of you that's so dark you don't let anyone see. Even the Bible nods to that on John 3:19-20 and Ephesians 5:11-13. Your shadow is all of your immoral urges, vulnerability and intrusive, dark thoughts combined.

Which makes these two interactions very interesting:

It makes you wonder what's up with Lena. It'd make perfect sense if Magica was Lena's shadow - which she is, for a while - because Magica is everything Lena hates and fears to become. But Lena is Magica's shadow.

If shadows aren't their own individuals, how did Magica create a person with their own thoughts and desires from her shadow? How come Lena isn't a walking amalgamation of the worst aspects of Magica?

We see Magica was able to jump into her shadow while her body got sucked into the dime, then she used her powers to form a temporary body she could cling to.

But what we see isn't necessarily true. It doesn't even make sense:

You can't just CREATE life with magic alone, and even if you could, it'd with much darker arts than just Shadow Manipulation and Transmutation.

↑ It would take a lot longer and a lot more power and materials than shown in the “flashback” anyways

Why is Lena a teenager? You trynna tell me Magica created a past version of herself, without her memories, just body and maybe personality?

This scene isn't even a flashback. It's the guys' imagination illustrating the poem Lena wrote. So not only is this scene not what Lena remembers, it also isn't necessarily true as something that Lena thinks she knows. Only Magica really witnessed what happened there.

Here's what probably happened: Magica was stuck in her quickly dissipating shadow and cast a desperate spell to latch onto somebody else's shadow just like Lena did to Webby.

Lena used the power of Webby's friendship bracelet to pull herself out of the Shadow Realm by latching onto Magica's shadow and even becoming physical WITHOUT A BODY. Even if Magica's magic isn't as strong as the magic of friendship, she could've just as easily latched onto somebody's shadow, especially Scrooge's, if she just needed a body to grab his dime.

I'm saying creating a teenager is overkill. It's even impractical, given her circumstances.

And I think the way Magica insists she's Lena's family - aunt, to be more precise - until she wants Lena gone for good... points us towards a very obvious solution:

Lena was Magica's actual biological niece like in the original Ducktales, as Poe De Spell's daughter.

The exact time passed between Scrooge's raid on Mount Vesuvius and Magica's first attempt to trap him inside the dime isn't clear, but if it was thirteen years, it would explain why Lena is a teenager. Though that would imply taking over someone's shadow would erase their memory and freeze their age...

If you scroll back to the first GIF on this post you'll notice Lena is the only shadow who didn't have red eyes. Even Magica had red eyes. That means she wasn't a regular shadow, not even a person-shadow.

And notice that even though it looks like Lena was turned back into Magica's shadow, the next time Lena shows up (GIF 7), she does not emerge from Magica's shadow. That implies Lena was dragged into the Shadow Realm through Magica's shadow, not turned back into a it.

Another nod that Lena was never a shadow to begin with is the way she's alone in the Shadow Realm. Nobody else's shadows are following their Objects around, and when other shadow spirits do appear, they are:

Shadowy shapes, unlike Lena, who was still bodily while in the Shadow Realm

Made from Lena's feelings of fear and jealousy. Which means they were her “Jungian Shadows”, and a shadow can't have its own shadows, can it?

By the way, did you notice the sunlight from that window is purple in the Shadow Realm? I think everybody knows the color of Shadow Magic is purple because it's black light - or ultraviolet light - the only light that won't light up a room, but will highlight namely “dirty” bodily fluids in fluorescent blue the way “dirty” feelings are hightlighted here.

It's interesting that Lena chose a blue light for her room, too. Just saying. I'm not going too deep into this particular detail.

Back on track, the Shadow Realm is something like nisses' Nowhere Space from Hilda.

It's a pocket dimension you can enter and leave through every shadow (unclear if it's only every person's shadow or any Object's shadow). The way it most differs from the Nowhere Space, is that the Nowhere Space is a space separate from a house, while the Shadow Realm seems to envelop the physical world.

The reason I believe it's a pocket dimension is because Lena was afraid about what would happen to Webby if her tulpas took her outside, as if the Shadow Realm is only inside buildings. That could be because the inside of a building is a shadow in on itself. See how Lena only steps out of Webby's shadow once she's inside of the library? She also opens her eyes like she's just waking up.

This explains why Magica waited until the eclipse to make her move. Duckburg was under the moon's shadow, extending the Shadow Realm into the streets.

I wasn't sure Shadow Magic could be considered Dark Magic at first, but if it allows you to bring people's evil dark sides to life and ban someone into the Shadow Realm, I guess it can be pretty harmful. Tbf it's a magic completely based on lies, omission and your Evil Dark Side. It can also just be shadow-transportation or the power to turn yourself into a shadow though.

Anyways, one thing I haven't figured out is what could be the downside to Shadow Magic. Every Dark Magic comes with a price, be it something that directly affects the user (e.g. illness, curses, losses, etc) or a setback with the spell itself, (e.g. the “came back wrong” trope). Based on the inconvenience of shadows irl, the drawbacks could be:

Feeling cold all the time

Phosphenes

Sensitivity to light and/or poor eyesight

Becoming green (???)

Thanks for reading, this was.. Something. I'm getting too autistic about this show.

[lostwords-found]

Oh god. Okay. SO. The Protocol red string board is going places and I am chewing drywall.

Note: I've been working on this post for a few days and nothing in here involves episode 27--I don't talk about episodes before they're out for everyone, so no worries about patreon spoilers.

Quick recap of some suspicions about Protocolverse I've written about previously:

1. I think this universe runs on a kind of balance of good & bad luck (or suffering and happiness), and that it's possible--under certain circumstances--to pawn the bad stuff off on other people and keep the good that arises to balance it out. I suspect a big piece of Protocol's overarching plot is going to be about the different ways people go about trying to come out ahead in that bargain.

2. I think some alchemists figured out how to attach bad luck and/or other similarly abstract ills into physical form.

3. I think they were trying to use this to cast out bad luck to other worlds (including that of Archives) and get good luck back. I think this is how the Fears got to Archives in the first place.

4. I think the books and coin in the tomb from MAG 23 got there this way, probably with the involvement of Protocolverse Albertus Magnus. The year on the coin -- 1279 -- is the year before Albertus Magnus died.

We'll come back to that stuff in a bit.

There's an apparently minor detail that was nagging at me recently: in TMAGP 22 Hans Berger specifically mentions having switched to silver wires in his experiments, and this change enabling his breakthroughs. It's through these silver wires, implanted directly into Herr Schmidt's brain, that he later receives the desperate telegraph signals that appear to be from a previously unheard part of Schmidt's brain.

By itself, that wouldn't ping any alarms. Silver wires are in fact what Berger used in real life; silver's highly conductive so if you're trying to read electrical impulses from the brain, probably a good choice of material. But the writing is very deliberate about mentioning them, and coming only three episodes after another historical letter about a scientist also working with silver -- Newton's tree in TMAGP 19 was a fantastical variant of a Tree of Diana, dendritic silver -- Berger's wires start feeling like maybe they're not just there for accuracy.

If, as it appears from Newton's work, consuming silver in certain forms can cause a new kind of consciousness to arise--and also, uh, turn you into a tree--what might implanting silver wires in a human brain do? Is the silver contacting or awakening something that was already there, or is it putting something there? Was that desperate OUT OUT OUT message really from half of Herr Schmidt's mind--or from something in the wire itself that was trying to get out?

That would be weird though. I mean--what, Protocolverse silver's inherently evil or something? But then I got back to thinking about alchemists trying to transmute things into precious metals. Gold's the one we mostly think of, but silver was also of interest. Which in real life is where you got stuff like the tree of Diana--alchemists thought that was a precursor to the philosopher's stone.

So... then I start thinking, if I was right in my other post that alchemists were figuring out how to put evil / misfortune / suffering into a physical form that could be used to transfer it somewhere else, what if silver was involved in that? What if they were either turning misfortune into silver, or trapping it in silver that already existed?

What if they did that, meaning to send it away, and some of that silver made its way into use?

Then I started looking some stuff up.

Did you know silver used to be mined in the Black Forest, in Germany? One mine there had a name meaning "Blessing of God." That mine dates back to the 1200s--Albertus Magnus's lifetime.

Did you know that starting in the 1600s, the G strings on high quality violins were typically wrapped in silver wire?

Do you know why movies are called the silver screen? In the 1920s, literal silver was used to make cinema screens. This fell out of favor as other cheaper designs were worked out, BUT in the 2000s silver has come back into use a bit because it works well for 3D movies. I would not be surprised at all if the screen that Tom went to see Voyeur on had silver in it.

Did you know that in the early 90s there was a specific plant in the UK that manufactured CDs covered with a layer of silver? This later turned out to cause some problems as the silver reacted with sulfur (oh hai, another alchemically significant substance!) and slowly degraded the discs. In real life these CDs were manufactured up through 1993. Per TMAGP 10, Mr Bonzo made his debut in '96 (the interview is from 2021 and is the 25th anniversary of Mr Bonzo's first appearance). The two times Mr Bonzo has appeared in person he's been summoned by playing a CD of his theme song. I wonder where and when those CDs were manufactured...

Did you notice the caterer Lady Mowbray hired in TMAGP 15 mentions that his company did silver service events? Betcha that particular feast was served on literal silver platters.

...I'm starting to think it's a really good thing ink5oul didn't end up tattooing Gwen with that silver spoon.

Okay. This all seems like there's maybe a theme here, but let's take a step back. Some materials have just been used for a lot of things throughout history; it could be coincidence. IF the above is actually on the mark--IF these were all intentional majorly-plot-relevant inclusions of Things Wot Involve Silver--where else would we expect to see this cropping up in the story? Because the topic of silver has barely been raised directly at all; I'm extrapolating wildly here, mostly on the basis of a couple episodes.

Well, here's a thought: silver was used in everyday currency for a long, long time. If there was a bunch of Evil Silver floating around surely someone would have stuck it into some money at some point. "Ill fortune" in the most literal possible sense, or whole new meaning to the phrase "bad penny" -- there are various bad jokes there that more or less write themselves. Though whoever was doing this would have had to to mark the bad money somehow so that they could avoid it...

Hey, um, remember how the OIAR's offices are in the building that housed the Royal Mint for like 150 years?

Actually, while we're on that subject, here's a funny little tidbit: Before it moved to Royal Mint Court, the Royal Mint was in the Tower of London for several centuries--its first home after being centralized. Wanna guess what year the Royal Mint was established in the Tower of London? Go on. Guess.

1279.

The same. Fucking. Year. As was on that coin waaaaaay back in MAG 23. Which was a thing I had noticed a while back when looking at the Germany eps, but I hadn't been considering a "what if some metals can be Bad" angle at that point and had just written it off as an odd coincidence.

Which I mean, it's probably still just a weird coincidence, I'm building this entire elaborate framework out of assumptions on top of assumptions on top of -- hang the fuck on, let me look something up real quick, I've gotta be misremembering--

I'm not misremembering! Isaac Newton was the Master of the Royal Mint for the last 30 years of his life.

Cool. Okay. So that's--hm. I think I'm genuinely starting to convince myself none of this is a coincidence.

Then I start poking through Wikipedia, and you wanna know some other interesting things? One, Newton himself apparently saw his work in economics as a continuation of his alchemical work. And two, during his tenure at the Royal Mint, he put limits on how much gold people were allowed to exchange for silver, and this led to a silver shortage. Because apparently, when other countries imported goods to them, the British paid for those goods in silver coins. When they exported goods to other countries, though?

They would only take payment in gold.

And there it is--there's the exact outsourcing scheme I was looking for. Stick all your suffering and pain and misfortune into your money, use that money to pay other countries, and get only the good stuff back. That... sounds really believable for the British Empire, honestly.

So I really think I might have some decent guesses on the historical stuff at play here. That only goes just so far though, because these days, silver doesn't really get used in coinage much.

Know where it does get used? Circuits. Electronics.

Computers.

If I'm right, whatever machinery the Mint used to store the intangible evils of the world in physical coinage for exportation, I would guess the OIAR is now using to instill all of those evils into FR3-D1 instead. One all-containing artifact of misfortune.

What the endgame is there, what the government gets out of it, I'm still not 100% sure--but I can't help thinking about Jonah's line in MAG 160 that Jon is not the Archivist but the Archive. That he is the record of fear, the physical embodiment of it.

There's people wanting to outsource absolutely fucking everything to AI these days, I guess.

SO THAT'S BEEN MY WEEK this is what my brain does when I have to drive all the way across the US alone, apparently. How are you all?

[peopleareaproblem]

Severance and Alchemy

So in my post about names and their meanings in Severance, I mentioned making a seperate post about alchemy and how it relates to the show. Stay with me, because it starts off with some basic introduction and then comes the theorizing.

Let's get into it! Spoilers ahead, obviously.

The "great work" (l. magnum opus) of alchemy was to create the philosopher's stone, an object believed to be able to do several amazing things.

The most commonly mentioned properties are the ability to transmute base metals into gold or silver, and the ability to heal all forms of illness and prolong the life of any person who consumes a small part of the philosopher's stone diluted in wine. Other mentioned properties include: creation of perpetually burning lamps, transmutation of common crystals into precious stones and diamonds, reviving of dead plants, creation of flexible or malleable glass, and the creation of a clone or homunculus.

- The Wikipedia entry for the philosopher's stone (emphasis mine)

If this is bringing to your mind the "remedium hominibus" (e. a cure for mankind) on the licence plates in Kier PE, then we are on the same page. The homunculus thing also reminds me of those doubles in Woe's Hollow.

Okay so! Basically the process of creating the stone involves three or four stages depending on interpretations. They are all associated with a colour.

nigredo, the blackening or melanosis

albedo, the whitening or leucosis

citrinitas, the yellowing or xanthosis

rubedo, the reddening, purpling, or iosis

If the stages are only three instead of four, as they often are, then the yellow stage is seen as only a bridge between white and red.

If season 3 has a red liquid in the opening sequence and a red background for the closing credits I'm going to lose my shit.

It's difficult to find any exact directions for the creation of the stone except that it involves all four classical elements, especially fire and water, and that it requires starting with the prima materia (e. first matter). This is an undefined material, but essentially some sort of a clean slate that can be molded (mercury seems to have been popular). From there the prima materia needs to be put through the three or four stages, often split into sub-stages. There are also two supposed ways to approach the magnum opus, the dry path and the wet path. (Iirc the dry path is the one that is quicker and more volatile.)

The stone is also somewhat synonymous with aether.

The word aether has many meanings and interpretations, but it might remind Severance fans of where Kier and Imogene met: when they were both working in an ether factory. That factory was probably producing diethyl ether, a chemical solvent. (Which sounds a bit like the name Dieter, incidentally.)

But aether refers to a fifth classical element on top of water, fire, earth and air. It is also called quintessence (the fifth essence). In alchemy, aether was thought of as pure and heavenly, and able to cure any ailment. In physics, however, it was proposed as the medium through which light was able to travel, much like sound moves through air. In this context it was referred to as luminiferous aether. (Luminiferous ➜ Lumon?)

I'm stuck on these four elements as compared to the four tempers (now that woe has been so firmly connected with water) and the four stages of the magnum opus process. The creation of this pure element after putting it through the four stages really rhymes with the Keir Eagan mythology of taming the four tempers to become a perfect and pure person.

I know that death is near upon me, because people have begun to ask what I see as my life’s great achievement. They wish to know how they should remember me as I rot. In my life, I have identified four components, which I call tempers, from which are derived every human soul. Woe. Frolic. Dread. Malice. Each man’s character is defined by the precise ratio that resides in him. I walked into the cave of my own mind, and there I tamed them. Should you tame the tempers as I did mine, then the world shall become but your appendage. It is this great and consecrated power that I hope to pass on to all of you, my children.

- Kier Eagan recording, as heard in the Perpetuity wing (emphasis mine)

I hope we get to hear the rest of the fourth appendix and how Keir encountered Frolic, Dread and Malice. I'd guess they're air, earth and fire, respectively.

(Sidenote: to me the "cave of my own mind" bit all but confirms the theory that Dieter was not a literal twin but an aspect of Kier that he was ashamed of. But I digress!)

I'm also thinking about Macrodata Refinement and how there are four categories of numbers, but five bins to sort them into. Each bin has a subfolder labeled WO, FC, DR and MA, clearly corresponding with the tempers. But why the five folders? How do you determine which folder a particular set of numbers belongs to? This still remains a mystery but I'm having Thoughts about quintessence.

I can't avoid connecting these to my name post and the many many references to water, fire, earth and light that pop up in the character names in Severance. But I really keep coming back to Gemma, and to Cold Harbor. Gemma, meaning precious stone. (And Peter meaning stone, too. Dry vs wet path, perhaps?)

Do I think Lumon is trying to literally make Gemma into the philosopher's stone? Probably not! But I don't need to tell you, a person reading a theory about Severance on tunglr.hell, that the show has a looming theme of death and rebirth, and theories abound of Kier and the Eagans "living on" or coming back somehow (the revolving, the intangible board of Lumon, et.c.). We know Cold Harbor is important, that it's connected to Gemma, and that Mark needs to be the one to complete it. If Gemma is supposed to become a metaphorical philosopher's stone (created from the prima materia of death/braindeath, or that of a freshly severed person) that could potentially bring Kier back to life and cure mankind of all ailments, that'd be pretty fascinating. Exploitative as fuck though, and if the black ➜ white/yellow ➜ red liquid theme holds will undoubtedly require her literal blood.

I'm interested in hearing your takes on this, and if this makes any sense lmao. I can't always tell what's me doing literary analysis and what's actual foreshadowing or purposeful worldbuilding. Death of the author and all that. Also there's a whole Carl Jung psychology aspect that I could get into here that feels relevant but this post is already wayyy too long.

[powerfulantonella]

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