#to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all

[divinegrump]

*What I tell people:*

Queer

*What it maybe sort of means:*

Agender, genderqueer, ace spec, pan-alterous, t4t leaning (very much), potentially poly but would that work in practice/is that something I can do w Trauma???

[loveanddeepspacestuffforfreaks]

"Coffee without sugar is a crime."

Loveanddeepspace stuff for geeks, Coffee date~ It is my mission in this community to pump out as many Zayne fics as possible. Call me the Zayne fic factory- (no, actually don't...)

Zayne x reader, gender neutral reader.

Summary: Cafe date with Zayne, the waiter gives you to wrong drink assuming that you're the one with the sweet tooth. (Couldn't be further from the truth. Hehe)

I didn't proofread this- It's my fatal flaw, I know... ✋😔

GODDAMN I LOVE WRITING THIS STUFF

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The smell of roasted coffee beans fill the space as the two of you entered, walls decorated with an array of posters, plants and flyers bringing a sense of joy to your face as you step further inside.

Zayne follows behind, observing the surrounding as you approach the counter, greeted by a young barista as she writes down your order of a small black coffee, one sugar no cream.

She looks up expectingly at Zayne.

"And for you, sir?"

"Oh, may I please have-"

Without skipping a beat he begins to chant out his order.

"A mocha caramel latte chino made with skim milk, extra whipped cream. Please put that in a medium cup but use the same amount of coffee that you put into a small that way there's about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all." (Yes, this is a reference.)

The young women gawked at him, failing to write anything down as she stared at him, utterly baffled.

"Along with your- my lord that print is small- Chocolate monster shortcake." He spoke, adjusting his glasses as he squinted like an old man at the board.

"Oh you aren't writing anything down." Looking down he notices that she has failed to write. "Do you need me to repeat that?"

The young barista gives him a small nod and you leave a smile planted on your face. Headed off to find a place to sit as you hear him restate his order in addition to a couple more things.

"I would also like whipped cream on the cake along with the addition of chocolate syrup... That costs extra? -What an odd thing to charge extra for... a bit of syrup and cream? What is the economy these days...- Yes that's fine, thank you. Yes, it's for here."

In your search, you found a corner spot, perfectly shaded from the invading sun yet positioned in a way that made it easy to turn and look of the window and into the busy street.

Zayne would find you looking out the window of your seat and sit across from you, lightly placing the plastic card with the number 'fifteen' on the edge of the table.

Reaching for his hand, you would place your hand over his. Smiling adoringly at him as he met your eyes.

"You're so handsome~"

His brow twitch, as did his verdurous eyes. Turning his hand so that he could gently brush the tips of his fingers against your palm.

"What has led you to say that?"

Your smile would turn silly, intertwining your fingers with his before giving him a light squeeze.

"You just are~ oh so pretty and handsome~"

A chuckle would rumble in his throat as his hand pulsed against your skin.

"Well, that is due to the Hunter dotting on me left and right."

"You sure are lucky~"

His brow and the corner of his lip twitched a look of amusement forming on his face.

"Is that so?"

"Oh absolutely, who else what treat you like a king? Spoiling you with delicious treats huh?" You mused, resting your face in your hands.

Zayne leans back in his chair, one of his eyebrows lifting in a questioning manner. "I believe I'm the one that paid-"

"But I'm the one that took you out, no?" You interrupted; a triumph smirk plastered on your face.

A breath of air brushes your face as he sighs, conceding to your argument. "I guess that's true, hm."

You notice the waiter coming with your drink order and sit up, ready to receive your drink.

"Well hello there, thank you for joying us at the Luna Cafe! I'm Randy, if you need anything. Just give me a holler!"

You giggled at his silly mannerisms.

"Alright, I have one small black, one sugar no cream- Oh I bet that's for you, sir."

You had to bite back a laugh as he placed your drink in front of Zayne, who immediately looked down at the drink, giving, Randy a rare side-eye. Looking him up and down with a look of disdain through his dark eyebrows.

"And one a mocha caramel latte chino made with skim milk, extra whipped cream. Oh, that sure looks yummy!"

The waiter giggled placing it in front of you and politely nodding trying to desperately hold in your laugh.

"And one chocolate monster shortcake. Aw, are you guys sharing? how cute~!"

It was like a kick in the gut for you, a snort escaping your lips before covering it with a cough as the corner of Zayne's lips frowned.

"Alright you folks enjoy!" Randy ran off.

"Thank you~" You teased in a sing-song manner. In comparison to Zayne's curt. "Thank you."

One the two you made eye contact; it was over for you. Practically bawling your eyes out from laughter.

"Bahahah! Ah haha! oh, my goodness! That's hilarious!" You wipe a tear from your eye.

Zayne rolled his eyes, as you pushed the latte towards him.

"Switch?" He shots you a glare before passing you your order.

"Do you even need to ask?

"No you're right~ it's obvious!"

The two of you successfully make the switch and begin to chug it down as sip on yours. Placing your hand over his you smile once more.

"Zayne, you're such a cutie~"

He frowns, brushing his thumb against your knuckles. "In what way?"

You chuckled. "You looked so disappointed when you got the wrong order but you handled it like a big boy, I'm proud of you."

Zayne huffed. "Well of course I did. I'm grown. I can handle a slight mix up."

"Then do you want a sip of mine?" You tease, bringing his knuckles to your lips.

"Absolutely not." He says with the utmost certainty.

"Why not?" You coo, amused.

"Coffee without sugar is a crime to my body."

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Did you enjoy that? Pls give me more suggestions in the comments! what would you like to see next? Let me know, love ya!

[i23kazu]

GENSHIN MEN & THEIR STARBUCKS ORDERS .

characters. xiao zhongli diluc kaeya childe neuvillette scaramouche alhaitham kaveh & gn!reader genre. fluff. crack. if you get the reference from the first three categories, u get a kiss on the head n a cookie an. thought this would be haha funny. please laugh | please reblog!! im getting back into writing and reblogs with tags and comments will make me want to write more :D

i'll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skimmed milk, no whipped cream. please, put that in a grande cup? but use the same amount of coffee you would put into a tall. that way there's about an extra inch of room on top – to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee, at all.

CHILDE, kaveh, kaeya. (you.)

i'll have a tea. just... tea? (you look at him quizzically.)

ZHONGLI, xiao, diluc, neuvillette, alhaitham.

he'll have your green darjeeling tea, which i'm sure you know cannot be steeped for more than ninety five seconds.

KAVEH. (also you.)

gets a black coffee. doesn't tell the barista his name / gives the barista a fake name to use.

SCARAMOUCHE, xiao, alhaitham.

doesn't actually go to get coffee. believes in not being able to sleep, yadda yadda.

NEUVILLETTE.

is lactose intolerant (accepted it bc of you)

SCARAMOUCHE. xiao. alhaitham. neuvillette.

is lactose intolerant, but doesn't care. #yolo #needsahuglater

KAVEH, childe.

taglist: @tiredsleep @loptido @raincxtter @chichikoi @ladyadii @soulsanta @sheiiths @genshinparty @eowinthetraveler @moonbyunniee @legitnoi @lemontum @manager-of-the-pudding-bank @starz222 @ilyuu @cherry-colored-petals @mondaymelon @tartaglia-apologist @soleillunne @m1shapanda @aimynx @smokipoki @adeptuscharm @diorlumx (send ask/comment to be added to taglist)

reblogs w/ tags & comments help me lots !!! if you liked this, consider dropping me a follow as well :-)

[pbam0ney]

*sigh* please don't kill me...

I'll have a mocha caramel latte chino, made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup- but put the same amount you'd put into a tall. That way there's about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all!

[Xey stand there for a second before running for xeir life.]

(This is the mouse character Sherbert that I haven't touched since when they interacted with Poet, and before that since when they parted ways with the Fox-)

(Sean grabs them as soon as they were to run away and summons the coffee they wanted with the exact description and a name of "Fake mox")

Yeah, you're not moxxie from helluva boss pal...

[bettertwin1]

I'll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a Grande Cup, but with the same amount of coffee you could put into a tall- that way there's about an extra inch of room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all :)

U got it!

[capitalisticveins]

“I’ll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup, but use the same amount of coffee that you’d put into a tall. That way there’s about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all!” Cutie and “I’ll have a tea” Geordi

[dirtfullofwork]

Ok. Here is something bizarre that I was wondering of how your OC reacted to this.

Your OC is the one who's taking orders in a fast food restaurant. Like McDonald's, Carls Jr, Starbucks-ANY.

And once they're about to take their LAST order before taking breaks.

They recognize a familiar accent from someone. A SAMOAN accent and you can hear BUNCH of people and kids in the background. (It was Kanoa and Tiala’s family by the way-)

This is gonna take a LONG time for you to take their orders. What are their reactions?

(Because I saw this on TikTok that the guy was taking SO many orders from a SAMOAN family and he was looking TIRED.)

Ruz: hello what would you like to order

Kanoa: *takes a deep breath before..*

I’ll have a mocha caramel latte chino made with skim milk with no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup, but use the same amount of coffee you use in a tall, that way that there’s an inch of room on top. To stir my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all!!

:D

Ruz: WAIT WAIT WAIT MR. TOA?! IS THAT YOU?!…

Tiala: yes!

Ruz: I can’t put all the order in my head! Can you repeat that?!

Kanoa: I’ll have a mocha Carmel latte chino-

When ruz got on her break

Nigel on the phone with her: ruz are you crying?…

Ruz sniffling and holding in tears since she is not comfortable crying in front of people: Noooooooooo, just the toa family ORDERE EVERYTHING!!

[incorrectdisa]

Dwight: I'll have a mocha caramel latte-chino, made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup but use the same amount of coffee that you'd put into a tall. That way there's about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all. Dwight, turning to Gretta: What do you want? Gretta: I'll have a tea. Dwight: What kind? Gretta: Just...tea?

[devilsrecreation]

Reirei: I’ll have a mochacaramellattecino mixed with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup but use the same amount of filling that you’d put into a tall, that way there’s about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all

Reirei: What do you want?

Goigoi: ….I’ll have a tea.

Reirei: What kind?

Goigoi: Just….tea?

[trugthony-the-coffee-wizard]

I’ll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skim milk. No whipped cream.

Please put that in a grande cup. But use the same amount of coffee that you’d put into a tall!

That way there’s about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all 😊

Uhm, what is a grande?

This is not a Starbucks so I have no idea what you're talking about.

[theflatpancakes]

Poppy: I’ll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Please put that in a grande cup, but use the same amount of coffee that you’d put into a tall. That way there’s about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all!

...

Poppy: Waddya want?

Branch: I'll have a tea.

...

Poppy: What... kind?

Branch: Just... tea?

[mothfrye]

I'll have a mocha caramel latte chino made with skim milk no whipped cream. please put that in a grande cup- but use the same amount of coffee that you'd put into a tall, that way there's about an inch of extra room on top, to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all

pretty sky

[cherrydyedsocks]

being in a smaller niche pairing fandom is so funny bc you'll like be in the tag waiting for something new to pop up. VERSUS when you're in a larger one and you can be choosy!! like oooo I want this trope and this one.

it's giving very

"I'll have a latte caramel lattechino made with skim milk no whip cream, please put that in a grande cup! but with the same amount of coffee you'd put into a tall. that way there's about an extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all."

"what do you want?"

"I'll have a tea..."

[star-shine-s]

Agent 2: That short demons coffee order was so long my god.

Agent 1: Uh babes have you heard yours?

*also agent 2's ND ass whenever her and 1 go to Starbucks*

Agent 2: I'll have a mocha caramel latte-chino made with skim milk, no whipped cream, please put that in a grande cup, but use the same amount of coffee that youd put into a tall, that way theres about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all

Agent 1:

Agent 2:

Agent 2: what do you want

Agent 1: I'll have a tea

Agent 2, pulling her hood over her eyes because its bright: What. Kind.

Agent 1: Just tea

[stupid-gay-slvt]

i’m applying for a job as a Barista so here’s what i think OFMD characters would get at a coffee shop:>

Stede: I'll have a mocha caramel latte-chino Made with skim milk, no whipped cream Please put that in a grande cup But use the same amount of coffee that you'd put into a tall That way there's about an inch of extra room on top To stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all (from the song Big Picture from the Ordinary Days musical)

Ed: a tea with a dash of milk and 7 sugars

Izzy: Black coffee

Lucius: iced caramel latte

Buttons: milk with ice

Jim: espresso,,, like straight espresso shots

Oluwande: mocha

Swede: hot cocoa :)

let me know if y’all want a part two :)

[asktheyoungentrepreneur]

Dang, I'm surprised you're still alive after all these years *le pats your head*

Woah woah woah!

The help no touchy! But you came just in time. [Ahem]

I’ll have a Mocha Caramel Latte Chino, made with skim milk, no whipped cream. Make sure it’s got no more than four ounces of milk the beans wont have the right texture otherwise. Please put that in ‘Grande’ cup, but use the same amount of coffee that you’d put into a ‘Tall’, that way there’s about an inch of extra room on top to stir in my own nutmeg without spilling any coffee at all.