#to make a headcanon post:)

[redactedrem]

Headcanon where after so many arguments between the batkids and Bruce over his paranoia and complete disregard for his kids privacy, the entire family had compromised with (in the healthiest way possible) downloading life360 on their phones and that's how they all keep track of each other.

Now Bruce knew that this is mostly for his benefit and is supposed to be a healthy alternative for his unhealthy paranoia and helicopter parenting, but what he wasn't expecting was for his kids to start keeping track of him.

He's putting gas in his car and Dick calls him because apparently Dick has been watching him drive around on the app? And Bruce is currently at a gas station thats right around the corner from a Taco Bell and now Dick wants him to get food for everyone since he's already there.

He's driving home from a meeting and Steph calls him because her and Duke were shopping in the area and wants to know if he can pick them up, when he asks how she knew he was on the same street, he gets a "Oh I just like to stalk everyone on the app for funsies." as an answer.

Jason calls him and he can barely get out a hello before Jason cuts him off, "Bruce why the fuck is your phone battery on 5%, charge your damn phone" which completely stuns him because why does he know that. He clears his throat before answering. "Jason, what?"

"Everyone can see each others phone batteries on '360, now charge your phone." Is all he gets before Jason hangs up on him.

[machveil]

Off-Putting!Simon Riley with a Reader that matches his freak

Off-Putting!Simon Riley that stares at you like you’re a figment of his imagination. you’re poking around in the kitchen making a quick lunch while Simon’s cleaning dishes— well, he was. he paused when he felt the urge to look at you. he’s been lazily rinsing the same dish for two minutes, looking at you through his pale eyelashes as you quietly move about. he snaps out of it a minute later, your back is to him, but you’ve felt his eyes on you the whole time, “You can keep looking, Simon, just turn the faucet off.”

Off-Putting!Simon Riley that holds you a little too tight. his touch is always loving, but once in a while his blunt nails dig into your skin. small red marks from his fingers pads gripping the fat of your hips around the house left in his wake. in public he’ll do the same, no regard for how it might look to others, his eyes are solely on you. and, oh, Simon adores when you’re affectionately rough with him. he’s taken to wearing t-shirts around you, faded teeth indents littering his biceps from when you’ve felt the need to nip and gnaw at him

Off-Putting!Simon Riley that follows you around the grocery store, he’s been keeping a small distance - idly following you while passersby glance at him. you like it when he shadows you, standing at the edge of the aisle you’re in. he only comes up to you when a man approaches, the poor guy telling you he there’s some ‘strange man’ stalking you through the store. Simon’s suddenly beside you, dark eyes glaring at him as you smile, “Oh— thanks, this is my husband.”, you laugh, smitten when you look up at your Simon

[remxedmoon]

yknow i think their cloak should be a little stained actually. just a little.

[shitpostingkats]

I've been making a collection of aa4 lines that make me lose my entire mind

[demigods-posts]

headcanon that percy and annabeth have a relationship contract they made after they got together once the war came to pass. they outlined it on paper in percy's bedroom. typed up a final draft using sally's laptop. and printed out and laminated it at the local library on their two month anniversary. and they abide by it like it's the law.

[strngedve]

We know Castiel is based on Cassiel the archangel but my favorite little headcanon is that he was the archangel Cassiel.

He was created as the angel of Saturday, patron of the vulernable and the overlooked, the angel of tears, angel of temperance.

But that was it, wasn't it? Castiel lacked temperance -- He could never be like the other angels, God hadn't created him to be a warrior like his brothers; Cassiel was a gift to humans, the angel of strife and duality, something so fundamental to humanity. The only angel who could really understand them. The angel who sat and watched, waiting to be called upon to deliver peace. Cassiel was God's love for humanity. How could God not know Cassiel would get too close, too involved with humankind? Maybe he did, but he could never know his own love would ever defy him. Maybe he could never know that whatever he burned with his divine love was also scorched with his divine wrath, enough of it to break ranks when he finally tired of watching Heaven play with the Earth.

So God punished him, bent him into the shape of a solider and named him the shield of God as a reminder of what his role had always been. But Cassiel was special, he would always be special, so he disguised Cas, protecting him from the persecution of the other angels. Maybe he even wipes it all from Cas' mind, gets rid of the memory of rebellion before Cas can hurt himself with it again.

And Castiel does it right this time. He stays just as detached as he needs to be, he protects only who he needs to protect, he does only what he is told to do. So God gives him another chance, another opportunity to prove himself with something big, the perfect task for his angel of the vulnerable.

Go fetch Dean Winchester.

What could go wrong?

[obsesssedblerd]

jjk men when you ask them to kill a spider

geto would poke just a little bit of fun at you for being so scared, but would handle it. due to raising nanako and mimko, he's usually the one handling spiders and bugs in general.

gojo would either laugh at you for being scared of something so small, or he would also think it's terrifying and straight-up hollow purple it without a second thought. your apartment's completely destroyed, but hey, at least the spider's dead!

nanami would take care of it immediately. that man is literally perfect, and he doesn't want to see you scared or stressed. he wouldn't even make fun of you, and he'd gently tell you that the spider's gone once he's done so you can come out of hiding.

choso also wouldn't make fun of you. he'd calmly collect the spider, take it outside, and release it back into the wild. he's a sweetie like that.

toji plays too much. he'd make it seem like he's taking care of the spider and then would pretend to throw it at you. he'd laugh at your screaming.

sukuna, on the other hand, would actually throw it at you. zero fucks given.

[entrailseer]

AUGHHHHH FINALLY THE POMNI APPRECIATIVE ARC!!!!

(also gooseworx.... have you been reading my headcanon posts... because)

[zoneofsmites]

Im of the full (possibly delusional) belief that Durge is not the species that they physically appear to be.

You’re telling me this being crafted from nothing but bhaal’s flesh and his blood - this demigod - is actually a dragonborn/tiefling/human/elf/etc.

No. This thing is bhaal’s flesh and it just happens to look like that. They’re an imitation of a species, they’re not truly a (full)mortal being, they have no heritage aside from bhaal.

As a result I’m sure there’s some…oddities.

For example, a demigod child, not fully mortal. I doubt they adhere to the lifespan of whatever species they look like. Looking younger than they should. (less so perhaps with long lived races like elfs and half-elves where that is par for the course).

A dragonborn durge that by all accounts looks like a blue dragonborn but their breathweapon is acid. A tiefling durge that seems to be a Mephistopheles tiefling but they cannot cast mage hand, instead smiting like a zariel bloodline tiefling.

An elf or tiefling durge that doesn’t read as fey or infernal trough identification spells. Because they aren’t either of those things. Perhaps they could read as divine but not quite.

Members of a race that durge is supposed to be looking at them and sometimes when making eye contact they read as wrong. And some kind of uncanny effect triggers in their brain.

Give me more freaky durge who isn’t really what they appear to be at all. Just a little murder demigod crafted from dead god flesh to be the shape of something else.

[nerdy-hyperfixations]

“Pain is hilarious!”

C’mon guys he had to learn that his eye regenerates somehow!

So fun fact! You know that thing people, perhaps parents tell you? That if you smile it tricks your brain into being happy? Well don’t do that in traumatic moments! Because if you do, your brain mixes wires on how to process shit and when you’re under mental turmoil you might start laughing maniacally! I may or may not know from experience!!! 😃

[perdamian]

hey guys… we all know that it’s okay for mithrun to have a caretaker for the rest of his life, right? that even after he heals and potentially regains his desires he will probably still need support?? that the goal of healing is not to become a “normal person”, but to build skills to navigate the world in a way that accommodates your disability??? that relying on the people around you is not a failure, but proof of your desire to live????

[plounce]

why was bashir a closeted homosexual in the 23rd century? like dude it's fine you can relax. actually wait the tense here is kinda funny. i used past tense because ds9 is from the 90s and i watched it in 2021 so in both cases it's from the past in my view. but when talking about a text you speak in the present: why IS bashir a closeted homosexual in the 23rd century? but the statement is half about how ds9 takes place in the scifi future: why WILL bashir be a closeted homosexual in the 23rd century?

[m3rricat]

Thinking about how much I love the spawn Astarion graveyard sex scene (well, 'scene' is a generous term, since it's fade-to-black, but that's part of why I like it). I personally headcanon that it was pretty spontaneous--that Astarion didn't bring Tav there for that purpose, that he had originally intended just to show the one he loves the place where his life first ended to talk about his new life beginning. But, when the mood shifted just right, Astarion took a chance and grasped the feeling.

If it was spontaneous, it would probably have been the first completely uncalculated sex that Astarion can remember having. Sex that was far more about the emotions surrounding it than the sex itself. Yes, it's in the open on a grave, but it's not played off as done for the thrill or anything like that--if the place that held meaning for Astarion had been indoors, he would have done it there. It was about overwriting this place of horror with an act of love and intimacy and enjoyment (and there's an edge of defiance to it that is so Astarion, ugh I love it), a first step in Astarion writing his new life. And, with the fade-to-black, reinforcing that he is done with performance.

[lizardpersonyknow]

It's so incredibly funny to me that somehow some people think Tim is a boring straightlace and Jason is deranged and unhinged

Like Jason at his worst is a murderous crime lord who also has a moral conscience, protects children and sex workers, works to make the worst parts of Gotham safer and wants to know that his dad cares

Tim at his worst on the other hand.... Rampant murder with NO morals, becomes Batman and uses the gun that killed Bruce's parents, dictator, takes over like half of America, goes back in time like a couple times to tell his younger self that this is their inevitable end just to fuck with HIMSELF

Jason at his best is the happy robin, loves school, cares for sex workers becomes a crime lord to help make sure the people who are addicted aren't being given toxic shit

Tim at his best is entirely unhinged, stalking Batman and Robin through the streets, blackmailing Batman, all the young justice shenanigans, creating a fake uncle to avoid adoption, beefing with a like 9 year old (deserved imo 9 year olds are MEAN), lies to everyone including batman and take pride in it

Like besties one is exponentially more of a black sheep and it isn't the drug lord, it's the heroic sidekick of batman

Yes Jason is still out on the streets wildin and feral but I don't think people give enough credit to how normal he is for his background

Yes Tim is CEO but he's also been 17 for years and probably has taken cocaine to see what it felt like

[hyperfixatingmenever]

[demigods-posts]

i'm one hundred percent certain that after percy and annabeth made out underwater. and he wanted to make their relationship official. the question was not "will you be my girlfriend?" but "can i be your boyfriend?" i don't care what the canon says. percy gave annabeth the space to take the lead in the relationship. because after a lifetime of being abandoned by everyone she dared to care for. and then watching her on the brink of a panic attack at the thought of losing him the last four years. he wanted to honor a new beginning between them by follow her lead and moving at her pace.