#to know me is to hate me is to hate what i've become!! it's to watch me as i'm falling from that last ladder rung!!

[fishnapple]

How they comfort you, their love languages

(Future spouse/partner/lover)

This is a mini reading about the things that your partner/spouse would do or say to comfort you.

This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.

Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐

About me | Masterpost

Book a reading with me - KO-FI (→ personal reading)

CUBE 1

"Our life together is the most important thing"

"You're alive, I'm alive and that's good"

Tickle

Clumsy jokes that make your belly hurt

"Let's go to the beach"

"Whatever you do, I'm right beside you"

"Don't worry"

"Don't be afraid to fall, I will catch you"

"I'm your biggest fan"

Silent understanding

Scary movies that make you jump into their arms

Passionate, emotional sex

The warmth of their body

Holding you in the dark

Holding your hands whenever you go out together

Warm breads and fresh flowers

Board games

Forehead kiss

"Let's run away"

"I will find you again even when you've become a star on the heavenly sky"

CUBE 2

Surprise gifts, this person could spoil you a lot with material gifts

"I will get it for you"

They would do many things to make your life easier without you knowing: take care of your routines, pack your lunch, iron your clothes, etc

Change the colour of the curtains and bed sheets to cheer you up,

Date nights

Take you to see the sunset, to somewhere dark and windy, surrounded by nature

"No problem "

"Let's me take care of it"

They comfort you in your dreams

Intuitively guess your thoughts

Whisper loving words when you are in public places

Be with you through every social events

"My greatest achievement is to be their partner"

Boast about you everywhere they go

"I command you to love me", then proceed to massage your feet

Holding you silently while you spill out your darkest secrets

Direct in displaying their desire for you

CUBE 3

Act all tough and intimidating with other people but become a mushy romantic when they're with you, especially in private

Never fail to notice and compliment your effort at taking care and beautifying yourself

Getting heart eyes both when seeing you in leisurewear and in glamorous clothes

Try to sing for you even if they hate singing or not good at it

Love poems

When they find it hard to express their feelings through words, they express through material gifts and sensory pleasures instead

Just buying you stuffs and pretend to not know about it or act oblivious and nonchalant

Wrap you in softest blanket

"Let's go into the bathtub together"

Drying your hair

Take lots of pictures, of you alone, of you guys together, of your memories

"You're my best friend, let's me be your best friend"

"I love you "

CUBE 4

"I've loved you before and I will love you again"

"See you in our next life together "

Appear right when you need them

Act more confident and tough

The heat of their body

Pull you into them

"Lean on me"

Witty jokes

Irrelevant stories to distract you from whatever negative feelings you're having

Hand holding

Lots of notes

Phone calls throughout the day

Try to talk in the softest voice when they're with you

"Let's play video game"

"Let's me draw your silly face"

"Let's take a day off and go to where nobody knows us"

The meadows, the sea, the mountains

Take your pleasure as their top priority

Love making

"I'm afraid that this is all a dream, but as I go to sleep and wake up everyday, you're still there"

"Your pain is my pain "

Warn anyone dares to come in between you two

CUBE 5

"Nothing can stand between us"

"We can go anywhere we want"

"I believe in us"

"Hey, teach me how to do this"

Make plan for both of you

"Let's me read Tarot for you"

Always on time

Keep their promises, from smallest one to biggest one

Cakes and sweets

Warmth food

Hype you up

Eager to hear you talk

Patience

Try to be silly just to cheer you up even though they seem to be a pretty serious person

Laughter

Refer to you as "my love" when talking with other people

PDA

"I think I'd done good deeds in my past lives, that's why I met you"

Looking deep into your eyes

"I believe this relationship has changed us for the better"

Ride of die

"Till death do us apart "

CUBE 6

"You were alone, but now you have me"

Act childish and cute to get your attention

Also love it when you do the same to them

"Let's get married "/ "Let's get married every year"

Tell you about their childhood nightmares and how embarrassing they were

"I was told to wait for you when I was a kid"

Has no shame in acting embarrassing or silly just to make you laugh, even in public

"Do you want to date me" (even when you guys have been married for a long time)

Handmade gifts

Corny pickup lines

Genius at solving problems

Try to get you to debate about odd topics

Looking intimidating and professional in public but don't care about people's opinions, especially about you and your relationship

Will defend you in any conflicts

Take your side unconditionally

Willing to share everything with you

Honesty

Think of a new way to affirm their love everyday

"We make a great team"

[conkreetmonkey]

Honestly, I envy these people. Imagine being THIS passionate about your profession. Imagine getting to do your favorite thing every day, all day, and getting paid good money for it. Imagine having an easily monetizeable special interest that obviously, unquestionably and tangibly has a positive impact on society.

Like, I'm over here geeking out about... wait a minute. I love building materials, interior design and architecture, and while I'm not employed in the field, I AM strongly considering going to college for architectural engineering, and I DO spend hours playing shit like House Flipper 2, Tiny Glade, and Fallout 4 (almost exclusively for the settlement building, fuck my bitch-ass son he can stay lost there's roofs to patch and scrap to jerry-rig into beautiful furniture, bitch), meticulously arranging things to be square and true by individual degrees and game units and cycling through countertop and wood stain options for hours...

...shit, I think this post has genuinely helped me figure something out about myself. Why the fuck do I feel all self conscious about my deep yearning to fix shit, it's a great passion to have. I SHOULD become an architectural engineer or something. Like, I was spackling up dents in the drywall for fun the other day and feeling guilty about it. What the fuck. Why have I been feeling like this is some sort of stupid, silly passion to have. 95% of people fucking hate doing home repairs and building fences and mapping out paving block patterns, yet the design, construction and maintainence of buildings is wholly neccesary for society to function.

...ok like legitimately, I have some things to think about now... some soul searching to do... thank you, Farm Simulator post. If the youth employment program I'm signing up for allows it, I may finally bite the bullet and contact my local Habitat For Humanity about volunteer opportunities... I've wanted to for years, but have been afraid of getting shit on for "working for free" (when I know I'd enjoy every second of it)...

...I think I really DO wanna go back to college. Oh my god.

just learned about farming simulator

I mean, I already knew about it, but I just learned about it

Did you know that the target audience for Farming Simulator is actual real-world farmers? Because I didn’t. I just assumed that farmers probably don’t want to go home from a day of farming to do some (presumably highly inaccurate) virtual farming?

Like, imagine if the target audience for Power Washing Simulator was actual professional power washers.

Farming Sim gets sponsored by companies and shit to put ads in their games. But since the game is for farmers, all of the ads target farmers. Advertising products that, realistically, only farmers would be interested in. Aka John Deere tractors and shit.

There’s a fucking farming sim esports league. Where do they play? Agriculture conventions. not gaming conventions. agriculture conventions.

[bugslaststraw]

See it's funny because in the games, and in any other assorted media before the movies came out, everyone low-key just hates Robotnik. And not even in the fun dedicated way like they all seem to think he's a bit of a failure. Which sounds weird if you don't know anything about Sonic (and certainly sounded weird to me three weeks ago when I was one of those people) but it really is just genuinely the case. I think?

Obviously his family all hate him. Movie-only fans will have an idea about this one; we've got good old Geralt Robotnik who didn't give a rats ass about him in favour of his long-dead cousin Maria, whom he wants revenge for. Geralt manipulated him and used him and said "oh Ivo you're no Maria" even though Ivo probably doesn't even know who the fuck Maria is in the movie universe and so on, et cetera. Geralt sucks just as much in the games and did approximately the same thing there.

What you may or may not know is that in one of the games, Eggman runs into a descendant of his from generations into the future. That guy's name is Eggman Nega, and he absolutely hates his ancestor. He thinks he's cramping his style? He's trying to go back in time and kill him to restore his reputation as far as I remember. Not to mention he has other family and cousins, none of whom give a flying fuck what happens to him. I distinctly remember someone who's name was Collin but who's nickname was Snively and who also worked with Eggman at some point, but hated him, and then later betrayed him. I can't remember a single family member of Eggman's that actually seemed to like or even tolerate him.

He's had a lot of henchpeople too. Most of them were robots. A lot of them, like Omega, and Gamma, and Sage to an extent (although she was more like a robot daughter he built for himself) betrayed him and joined the good guys too (Sage is another outlier, she isn't exactly switching over I mean she definitely likes him but she definitely isn't loyal either so.??) I mean, Eggman isn't even surprised by the fourth time. Smaller minions like Orbot (and Cubot? another outlier) and their predecessors weren't able to betray Eggman, but definitely would've if they could've because they all disliked him because he's allegedly a shit boss. (Who says he isn't. He's evil after all.)

He "contracts" a lot of spies and stuff too. Animal characters. They all hate him as well, but he tends to hate them in return, so at least those are entirely fair game.

Not to mention all the villains he's conveniently happened to need the same thing as at the start of the game, but become inconvenient to towards the end, so they betray him as quickly as possible to get ready for their final boss fight with Sonic towards the conclusion of the story. There's more of those than I can count or care to remember. He meets his alternative universe self once and they hate each other. There's even a moment in I think the comics where Eggman loses all his memories and temporarily becomes nice, and hangs out in a village and builds things for the furry people who live there. He makes a wooden puppet style robot that also becomes like a daughter to him. She's good at engineering, just like him. Of course when he gets his memories back and becomes evil again she leaves as quickly as possible and later helps Sonic & co. She's very resentful about it all, I've heard.

None of that is surprising, of course. Eggman is an evil villain to the heroes and a loser to the villains. It's funny! It's a joke. They need to introduce scarier villains in the games to ramp up tension but they can't exactly just drop Sonic's nemesis down a hole somewhere, being as iconic as he is... So he sticks around. But as a joke, rather than an actual threat. And it's a little sad, yeah. But he deserves it! He's trying to create some sort of totalitarian egg-state and he bullies Sonic for having friends, for Christ's sake. Why should anyone want to stay loyal to a guy like that- and why should anyone do it at all? Joining the heroes is the cool thing to do! Shadow does it, Knuckles does it, Omega kinda sorta does it, Sage is toeing the damn line from what I've heard, it's...

Okay, it's kind of a lot? I mean I understand having nobody that's a good guy like the villain, but like... Not even his damn henchpeople robots? In a lot of the animated shows and comics he keeps building robot wives for himself that are explicitly created just to like him, by him. That or he's into someone who's into one of the animals, or similar. I mean, it's that bad. And it's like... Nobody? Not even once in like thirty years did anyone come up with the idea to give Eggman?? This behemoth among famous pop culture characters? A loyal henchman?

And- well, okay, nowadays this isn't true anymore. I'm sure we all know why. And that's kind of fun; in 2020, Doctor Robotnik gained his first and only loyal henchperson. Great! But...

Jeff Fowler is a Sonic fan, isn't he. Would he know..?

Would anyone involved in making the movies know that Eggman famously... Doesn't have any friends? That nobody seems to like him? That he's apparently infinitely betrayable? Do they know? Do they know? Is that why the third movie is written like that? Is it not just a character complex pulled out of someone's- I mean, when movie Eggman says that there's only ever been one person who actually liked him and one person who actually cared about him... He's quite literally right, isn't he. As in... Since 1991... Like 34 years since conception as a handful of red pixels in the hottest new platformer game there's actually, literally only been one character..? ooh I think I need to lie down for a bit

[genderqueerdykes]

I do apologise if this a weird ask and fairly jumbled but you're the only blog I'm not terrified to ask.

How to not be scared of people is my ask.

I've passed for a while as male and really the second I did then everyone left me. A few stayed longer to convince me against it but they left to. Even the queer club I went to stopped letting me in. i have not had friends or anyone close for a few years now. I don't remember my last interaction that wasnt a stranger.

I don't know how to change it, my last interactions were around them hating me being a man. So I just don't know how to not expect that at this point. I'm just scared of everyone, being online has probably made that worse. Every video or post will have the punchline of hating men or trans people. It's It's normal and that makes me so scared to ever even try talking to another person again. You don't have to answer this of course but you're the only person who has made me feel worth something, that I'm not automatically a monster because of something I can't control. So I figured to try to ask. If not then that's okay, I do really appreciate you posting.

the queer club you were going to stop letting you in???

this is seriously out of control. i can't believe how many people this is happening to in real time. this isn't an issue that just exists on the internet. the man hating, antimasculism and transandrophobia that's present online is affecting the real world. this isn't small potatoes, this is a massive problem that's excluding and hurting and abusing people in real time. i'm so sorry to hear that holy fuck

I'm just scared of everyone, being online has probably made that worse. Every video or post will have the punchline of hating men or trans people. It's It's normal and that makes me so scared to ever even try talking to another person again.

a lot of trans men are expressing this sentiment right now. even im wary of who i interact with because i have no idea if they're going to freak out when i they find out i'm a trans man. it only feels like a matter of time some days. it's ridiculous. i lived with trans punks and they all ridiculed me for being transmasculine. rad feminist ideals have become the norm in the queer community as of 2024 & 2025. the people running these spaces are radfems. this needs to come to an end.

no matter what you think, man hating, antimasculism & transandrophobia are perpetuated the most by radfems. doesn't matter what kinds of radfems, trans or cis. this behavior comes from lesbian separatism. it comes from political lesbianism. it comes from disenfranchised trans women who hate being misgendered and take that out on trans men. this is the norm right now. it's not okay.

i hope things get better for you soon. i have no idea how we've let things get this bad but it's not okay. we can't keep doing this. so many trans men feel like you do where they just don't wanna interact with the queer community at all because of this. and honestly i feel it. i feel so disconnected from so many people who think it's cool and progressive and funny and based to hate men and mascs like we've all hurt them personally. it's hostile as hell

[enjoythesilentworld]

2024 fandom review!

thank u for the tag @willesredlights sorry it took me literally ages to get to it

lets pretend we're not almost two weeks into the new year ok? and what a year it has been. holy shit.

~ Fics written ~

I'll be honest I did go a little batshit crazy this past year. 314k words across 19 published works, plus god knows how much more unpublished on tumblr. listen, I was deep in the ??? phase of my master's (still am, lets be honest) and desperately looking for a new creative outlet. I've always been a writer, always loved dreaming up stories, but I have never quite connected to a universe as much as I have to this one. I resonate with so many of the characters, and i just feel like there is so much room to play and explore. i will continue to add in old people OCs to my fics wherever and whenever i get the chance.

First fic: for the tree's sake (M, 48k) aka tree boys inspired by the trip that eventually led to my discover of young royals in late '23, and my darling baby. yes, that airplane ride that seems weird and random is based on truth!

Fav fic: just if for a minute (T, 53k) aka fake married idiots i greatly enjoyed making Wille suffer for just under 53k. that confrontation scene took days off my life and yet i am so proud of how it turned out.

Honorary mention to Growing towards the light, which was a dream to work on and create with my dear sweet friend Lia. there is one braincell between the two of us and it's full of nature facts and dick jokes. and beautiful stories about getting lost in the wilderness and finding yourself along the way. and tent-dick jokes.

Last fic: Wille på Hyllan (T, 13k) aka christmas shenanigans! another collab with my dearest friends which was hilarious to write and so silly and imo an example of one of the greatest perks of being in a fandom: meeting some of the most incredible people ever. also, dick-lights and dick-tomtar and dick-cookies. what more could you want?

~ Fics Read ~

if i tried to go through my history and tell you how many fics i read this year i would never make this post. i'd be here counting and trying to copy links forever. i read hundreds of fics. i enjoyed all of them, thoroughly. i got a lot better at leaving comments (sometimes). i was consistently and repeatedly blown away by the genius brains we have in this little Swedish corner of the internet.

if you are a writer i love you and i give u a kiss on the forehead.

also: i recently made a lil rec list here.

~ Other Stuff? ~

i had two big, busy months this year. three? : May, Wille's month & July, Simon's month i cannot believe i wrote 62 stories in 62 different universes (give or take a few). that's kind of stupid! but oh my god it was so fun!! some of my favs: -> Food, where Wille and Simon meet and embark on a mistakenly booked couples food tour in Barcelona -> Fashion/Style, aka the Met Gala AU aka the thing that turned into something so much bigger than i could have ever imagined. literally i thought people were gonna hate it. so, thank u for not hating it. and for letting it become 15k+ of pwp. -> Secret, friends to lovers RAHHHHHH -> Home (Improvement), aka grumpy home renovator Simon idk i just feel like this should become a full-blown fic one day

and oh boy who can forget about Kinktober from wax kinks in 17th century Italy to desperate love confession in the middle of wildfires to... whatever that was in the confessional (idk, that's between them and God).

2024...

I did some painting: x x I wrote some real weird lil ficlets: x x and I met dozens of incredible people. thank u for liking my stupid rambling posts from 3am and my silly little ficlets and for reading my stories and telling me about your stories and saving me from the Frankfurt airport and yelling with me about stuff thats definitely not in the Bible and sharing your time and space and art and care.

@bigalockwood @hergrandplan @gulliblelemon @saynomorefic @pagegirlintraining @skibasyndrome @sobadbad @impossibleknots @piebingo @theaviatorthatcouldnotfly @misfithive @sillylittleflower @zee-has-commitment-issues @purplehoodiesandclementines @justfriendsbestthings

giving u a big hug. and! this is by no means an exhaustive list. if ur reading this we are bffs. send me a message ok? ok. y'all keep me sane and happy and i am so grateful for you! live love wilmon

[whysperingwoods]

I've had to block the "tarot reading" and "pick a card" and "pendulum reading" tags because otherwise the witchblr tag is completely unusable. I wish there was a way to stop those posts from showing up altogether instead of showing up but saying "this post is hidden". I also wish I could mute users without blocking them. I don't want to see AI generated crap constantly and the same correspondences posted over and over but I also don't necessarily want to ban this person from seeing my content (if there are ways to do this please let me know, I was off tumblr for a long time).

I also ran into the problem when starting to use this blog again of feeling like I needed to explain every single detail anytime I made a post, but even still someone will come onto it with an "um actually" and I feel the need to constantly justify myself with "this is MY practice and how EYE do things after 15+ years", like I can't explain 15 years of practice every single time and how I arrived at doing things a certain way.

I decided this year I'm just not doing educational posts anymore altogether. If someone has questions then I'm happy to help, and when I see questions I feel like I can contribute to I answer them, but I ended up spending so much time agonising over the perfect wording and making sure every single detail is covered so extensively that it ended up making me hate writing.

It's funny going over my posts from four years ago, there were so many actual discussions in the community and the witchblr tag was full of people just sharing their practices and talking about different methods and techniques. There was still fighting of course but it was a different kind I guess?

And there is so much constant virtue signalling it's becoming unbearable. Every few posts is calling out x behaviour or y behaviour but like I'm in the witchblr tag every day, and never see those behaviours being called out actually happening. Half the time I suspect people are making up something to be mad about or they say some ragebait thing on another site and they're posting it like it's a regular occurrence.

I think the leaning further and further into the realm of "you don't have to do anything to be a witch, as long as you feel like one" has done the community some damage. I understand this was meant to be inclusive, but at some point if you've never made a loaf of bread in your life, can you call yourself a baker? There does need to be some element of practice beyond reblogging aesthetic images in the name of a deity (I would argue that makes one more of a devotee than a practitioner?). How one practices is entirely personal, but "practice" implies there is some doing.

Maybe this is what folks are trying to do with the #advwitchblr tag? It's unfortunately still very slow moving, but I'm hoping more and more people catch on to using it. This is also why I made the Witchcraft Discussion community as an alternative to the Witchcraft community so it was focused more on discussion than memes and random stuff unrelated to witchcraft, but so far I'm the only person posting there.

Anyway sorry for rambling on your post but this has also been on my mind for a while lol

excuse my complaining but

i wish the witchcraft tags on here weren't clogged up with tarot asks and selfies and AI generated crap

bring back spells and rituals and masterposts and tarot deck reviews and people learning how to do magic for more than the aesthetic and views

please im begging at this point lmao

[thestargayzingetherian]

She-Ra - What If Catra left the Horde and Adora stayed behind?

Okay so this started out as a reply to an ask @catras-breakup-song got about this question, but it got so long and I've been wanting to make big long ass discussion posts about these various canon adjacent or canon divergent topics anyway.

I will hopefully be making a lot more of these posts if this ends up doing really well.

Anyway, for our first one, we have what if Catra left the Horde and Adora stayed, a very popular AU concept I see going around. Personally, I see a few options for this, none of them are going to be any fun for Adora because well... if Adora stayed in the Horde, she's not going to leave. She was fully into the Horde propaganda and without Catra there... she's going to be so much worse.

Do let me know if you want me to make full fics out of these ideas, since that's kinda partly why I'm making posts like this. Also I might reblog these again in the future if I come up with any more potential options.

Also while the ideas might have some overlap, I'm gonna try my best to make each one have some sort of unique gist going for them.

Option 1 - Catra leaves but Adora stays in the Horde, Adora isn't She-Ra

Catra would finally steel herself to leave the Horde after getting hurt by Shadow Weaver far too many times. She hates that Adora is so dumb and she can't see the Horde isn't right for either of them. It takes all of her mental strength due to Shadow Weaver's abuse but eventually she leaves.

Catra would probably not join the rebellion in this version. Just because she hates the Horde, doesn't mean she's suddenly going to want to take them down. No, she'd probably make her way to the Crimson Waste and do the outlaw stuff there really early.

As for Adora, she'd be hurt by Catra leaving her and with her best friend gone, fully buries herself in being the best Horde soldier she can be and eventually is promoted to Force Captain, a ruthless general of the Horde armies.

Sometime later, Catra, now an outlaw in the Crimson waste, is minding her own business when a squad of Horde tanks move into the town she's currently staying in, with orders from Shadow Weaver to reduce it to rubble so the Horde can mine the area. When Catra sees the commander of the tanks... she sees a familiar blonde now wearing Horde Armour giving orders to her troops.

Option 1.2 - Catra does join the rebellion.

Like in option 1, Catra decides to leave the Horde of her own free will. Shortly after leaving the Fright Zone, Catra speeds through the whispering woods... and bumps into Bow and Glimmer. The two of them capture her, but Catra ends up strangely bonding with the two, Glimmer reminding her a lot of Adora. Catra intially wants to just leave the two, thinking she'll be better off on her own, but Glimmer sees how sad Catra is.

She offers to take her to Brightmoon, at least for a while so she can get back on her feet. Surprised at Glimmer's compassion, Catra agrees and goes with her to Brightmoon. Catra keeps her former Horde identiy to herself for a while, but before she can leave, she hears something from Glimmer about a new, very ruthless Force Captain who recently laid waste to the nearby town of Thaymor. In particular... the Force Captain was a young blonde woman.

Catra offers to go with Glimmer to find this Force Captain before she strikes another civilian town. Glimmer agrees and Catra goes with her and Bow to another town under seige from the Horde... and there, she comes face to face with Adora again.

Option 1.25 Catra becomes She-Ra

Like in the previous one, Catra ends up in the whispering woods... and it's there she discovers the She-Ra sword for herself. But since it won't do anyting for her, it's just a regular sword. She uses it to help save Glimmer and Bow from a rampaging monster in the woods and figures it might come in handy as a personal weapon.

Bow, fascinated by the sword, wants to study it as a peice of First One's tech. However... he finds that no matter what he does, the sword doesn't work and seems to be just a regular old sword, albiet one that's gold and with a silvery-blue blade.

When Adora is promoted to Force Captain, she is ordered to take command of the Horde's advancement towards Brightmoon, laying seige to the nearby towns. After Catra hears that Adora is in command, she comes out to Queen Angella about her time in the Horde and asks to be the one to be sent after Adora, thinking she can maybe reason with her old friend.

Angella agrees and Catra is sent out with Glimmer and Bow to the town Adora is attacking. Catra tries to reason with Adora, thinking she must see what she's been doing is wrong. Adora... doesn't care. Ever since Catra left and broke her heart, she's fully dedicated herself to the Horde cause.

Catra tries to fight Adora with her sword and during the fight, Adora touches the sword... and it starts glowing. Realising that something Adora has done must have activated it, Catra grabs the sword back... and is transformed into She-Ra.

Using her new powers, Catra is able to easily defeat Adora's troops. She has Adora at her mercy, wanting to take her prisoner... but a part of her just can't, a part of her still sees Adora as her friend and lets her go.

Adora growls at Catra, swearing revenge and wanting to claim the power of She-Ra for herself and for the Horde. And thus, Catra decides to use her powers to fight for the Rebellion, realising this is what she should have done from the moment she left.

Option 2 - Catra Leaves the Horde and Adora stays, Adora is She-Ra

One night, Catra tries to leave the Horde, tired of Shadow Weaver's abuse, tired of Adora just taking it. Adora finds her right as she's about to leave and the two get into an arguement. Catra eventually just leaves and Adora chases after her, clinging onto Catra's Horde Skiff.

However, the Skiff crashes in the Whispering Woods and Adora and Catra end up seperated. Adora, desperate to find her friend, searches for her, but to no avail... but she is soon led to a sword glowing in the woods and two rebels named Glimmer and Bow. Unlike in the main timeline, Adora is only focused on Catra, not her visions on the sword and thus, when she becomes She-Ra, she doesn't join the rebellion. Instead, she takes the sword... and her two new rebel prisoners, back to the Fright Zone.

Shortly after leaving the Horde, Catra finds herself in a kingdom named Plumeria. She isn't sure how she ended up there, but it seems like a nice place, even if she knows she probably won't be staying there. That all changes though, when the Horde suddenly attacks Plumeria... and Catra sees the leader of the attack is none other than Adora, now a golden armoured warrior. She also notices a new recruit among her ranks, a Pink-haired princess with some kind of sparkly magic and an dark-skinned Archer with a variety of trick arrows.

The Kingdom's princess, Perfuma, does her best to hold Adora and her troops back, but Adora is easily able to overwhelm Perfuma. Realising she can't just sit back and do nothing, Catra saves Perfuma's life and Catra recognises that Glimmer and Bow are clearly under some kind of mind control, sensing Shadow Weaver's magic aura around them.

Catra takes Perfuma with her, knowing that Plumeria is lost. The two flee their way to Brightmoon, where Queen Angella is reforming the previously disbanded Princess Alliance to counter the threat of She-Ra... as well as her own brainwashed daughter. Catra decides to offer the rebellion her services, somehow feeling in her gut that this is all her fault.

Option 3 - Catra Leaves the Horde and Adora stays, Shadow Weaver mind wipes Adora.

In this scenario, similar to option two, Adora catches Catra before she can leave, but is unable to stop her. In this version though, Adora isn't able to chase after Catra... which gives Shadow Weaver a chance to further embed her manipulative tentacles into Adora. She offers the blonde to take the pain away... and Adora accepts.

In this timeline, Catra has made it to the town of Thaymor, planning on leaving at a later point. However, she is caught off guard when the Horde attacks... and they're led by Adora. Catra tries to reason with Adora... but the blonde doesn't recognise her at all.

Heartbroken, Catra is forced to flee while the Horde lay seige to Thaymor. She is filled with so much guilt, knowing that without her, Shadow Weaver was finally able to take control of Adora, erasing Catra from her mind.

Catra spends the next few weeks and months fleeing from place to place, as Adora leads the Horde to victory after victory. She also discovers the She-Ra sword, which Shadow Weaver is able to corrupt with her magic, turning her into quite the forced to be reckoned with.

While on her travels, Catra hears the Princess Alliance is reforming in Brightmoon, to try and fight against the Horde. She is... tempted to join... but whose to say the Princesses would even trust her, especialyl if they found out that the reason for all of this is her fault.

The Horde lay Seige to Brightmoon and all of the Princesses are captured and made prisoners. However, Adora finds that she isn't satisfied with serving Shadow Weaver, knowing the witch is holding her back.

Catching them off guard, Adora takes out both Shadow Weaver and Hordak and seizes the throne of the Horde for herself... but not before Shadow Weaver uses the last of her magic to horribly wound Adora in an explosion that takes herself out.

Adora survives... but barely alive. Fortunately, by this point Entrapta is in the Horde now, Adora having convinced her during her conquest of Dryl. She begs Entrapta to save and she does, Entrapta even getting Hordak to assist.

Sometime later, Adora is reborn as the cybernetic warrior known as Despara, the last shred of her humanity and who she once was gone. Using her new leadership of the Horde, Despara quickly takes over Etheria and starts making plans to use a ship recovered from the Crimson Waste, as well as the countless slaves the Horde now has from the captured kingdoms to construct a fleet of ships. Hordak mentioned he had a brother... Despara might as well take him out too.

Option 4 - Catra is exiled to Beast Island.

This one's a bit different since it's not technically Catra leaving the Horde of her own free will but I think it's worth exploring nonetheless.

In this universe, Shadow Weaver finally has enough of Catra and decides to exile her to Beast Island. In her mind, it's the perfect place to send an unruly animal like Catra. When this happens doesn't really matter. It could be when Catra is just a kid or when she's around her canon age of eighteen.

When Catra ends up on Beast Island, she is intially hurt and heartbroken, missing Adora constantly. Thus, she decides she wont give in to what Shadow Weaver wants. She'll survive. As time goes by, Catra manages to survive on the island... and she soon finds she isn't alone.

A sorcecer named Micah is also there and the two strike up a bond, especically when Micah mentions that Shadow Weaver was once his mentor named Light Spinner. Micah also remarks that Catra reminds him a lot of his daughter Glimmer, who he hasn't seen for so many years. She was barely old enough to walk when the Horde captured and exiled him.

Catra and Micah make a promise, to escape Beast Island together, so Catra can find Adora again and take revenge on Shadow Weaver for what she's done to her... and Micah can be with his family again. The two of them form a plan, to use some of the discarded tech on Beast Island, as well as Micah's magic, to build a raft.

They are soon successful and manage to escape from Beast Island, however, their raft is caught in a storm... fortuantely for them, they are discovered by a sailor named Sea Hawk who gladly and proudly takes them to Salineas, hoping they can make their way to Micah's kingdom of Brightmoon from there.

However, upon making their way to Salineas, Princess Mermista is informed of terrible news. Brightmoon has fallen to the Horde and Queen Angella and her daughter have been captured. Before Catra can do anything... Salineas is then attacked by a Horde fleet... commanded by Adora.

Catra sees Adora and rushes onto the Horde flagship. Adora... is shocked to see Catra again. She had thought Catra had died on Beast Island years ago, Shadow Weaver having not erased her memory like in the previous version since well... she felt no need to. Catra was dealt with in her eyes.

However, as much as she is happy to see Catra... Adora has fully embraced her duty to the Horde. For Catra, her already weird adventure just got a lot more complicated.

===========

And that's the options I have so far! Again, do let me know if you want me to do more of these and if you wanna see these as fics at some point. Hope you enjoy my ideas!

[smoshtwtdrama]

FOR TODAY'S TOPIC(6) UPDATE!—

"my point was if you write something horny about real life people, criticism is natural" — Jaycee AKA TREVRASHA said after our conversation for a clearance between them and lilacfoxes

"Though I may not know what stories have gone through, I'll listen both sides and gather enough to understand what went on" — smoshtwtdrama

Few hours ago I have blocked Jaycee's main Tumblr and after that their new account found me and have reached me out. At first they replied to my TOPIC (6) talking about how this is a "bootleg mean girl" thing so I reached out to them.

I message them first with kindness and asked; "may I know why you're doing this? The whole "oh they're a bad person I'm gonna screenshot our conversations and let others hurt them back!" Thing?'

They've responded back sharing a kind tone as well before explaining; "I don't think lilac is a bad person, if you're asking why I posted the DM, wouldn't you? Who DMs someone to call them out of their name. -- especially after publicly putting on a front as if they're the one being attacked."

Smoshtwtdrama: "but why would you start first? If I remember correctly"

Jaycee: "because I followed them, I came across their Tumblr post on my feed. The post was essentially venting about people posting screenshots of their AO3 fic (the damangela one). I commented on the post (someone could argue that I shouldn't have commented in the first place but I truly wasn't being negative) and said something along the lines of "you posted porn about real people, of course some think it's weird." -- these past two days are the most I've even used Tumblr so I wasn't even expecting a response. But they responded saying most people had an issue with the damangela pairing, not rpf. I tried to make it clear that I didn't have any issue with rpf and I wasn't even judging them for rpf smut, I was saying that people weren't discrediting them as a writer, they were weirded out by the concept of two smosh members having sex. Whether or not they hate Damien has nothing to do with me, I personally enjoy him."

Smoshtwtdrama: "I see.. but in my point of view nobody should be posting about anybody if they could just communicate and understand through DMs, why must it start on long arguments on twitter? Several smosh authors are now terrified to receive hatred or become a laughing stock because of your posts."

Jaycee: "they posted me first on this app. i made the first tweet, basically repeating the same sentiment i had in my comment. i didn’t use lilac’s name or anything, because it wasn’t directed towards them. the interaction we had inspired me, yes, but they aren’t the only people who’ve created rpf smut (not even just smoshfandom but generally). they somehow saw the tweet, which had only 8 likes, and proceeded to screenshot it and post to their blog/acc. lilac posted me first, claiming that a nameless, if-the-shoe-fits kinda tweet was bullying them. i, in return, screenshotted the post made about me and posted it on twitter. i joked that i’ve now ‘made it’ and am famous because the situation was funny. people in the comments were laughing with me, not at lilac, but of course lilac is somehow the victim"

Smoshtwtdrama: "oh I see, but in lilac's point of view everything she read felt like it was pointed to her.. now I understand" I said because I'm starting to connect the dots between each other's posts

Jaycee: "and last thing i’ll say is i’m the literal last person smosh writers have to worry about. i wasn’t posting lilac to make fun of their writing. as i said, it didn’t even stem from a ‘fuck ur writing’ place. my point was if you write something horny about real life people, criticism is natural."

The conversation ends there with a simple "thank you for letting me know" I've asked Jaycee if they're willing to let me post our conversation to clear the air and they said yes.

But for the audience out there, this isn't something to side on of who's wrong or fault, it was a clear misinterpretation, if not then a wrongful communication. We don't have to post what we said if we can just communicated through messaging.

I understand both sides, nobody is wrong. And nobody should take sides.

What's your thoughts on this? Let me know!

|| THAT'S ALL FOR TODAY'S TOPIC!

[omnium-gatherums]

Like I don't know if you guys know but if you ask anybody out on the street if they know what dissocistive identity disorder is, you're most often going to get responses along the lines of "I don't know/I've never heard of that/what is that", "like multiple personalities?" and any other number of misconceptions and sometimes even downright actively ableist as Hell responses.

It is incredibly, incredibly difficult to get a therapist for any kind of mental health problem, and even MORE difficult when you have DID, even moreso when you also have to balance finding a therapist who ACTUALLY knows DID or claims and acts like they but then go on to refer to it as "split personality" (which was a real thing I experienced from a psychiatrist in 2023).

People with CDDs are constantly demonized and fake-claimed. You'd be hard-pressed to meet somebody who has heard of DID let alone knows anything about it.

Many of us have experienced very extreme abuse as children, abuse so horrid that most do not believe that it happens, abuse so horrid that we cannot believe it ourselves, abuse so horrid that we can't talk about it to most people, not even online.

Our memories are constantly questioned, not only by ourselves, but by society at large. People still believe in "false memories." People still believe DID is rare. People think DID is only caused by "the most extreme, horrific abuse ever."

People don't even believe DID is real at all.

Trying to find CDDs represented in literature, movies, anywhere is practically like trying to find a half-decent, barely edible apple in a pile of rotten apples, with like one or two rare perfect pieces.

DID is a heavily mysticized disorder, representing our switches as if we are demons becoming possessed for shock value, "SWITCH CAUGHT ON CAMERA!" is a common click-bait YouTube title, our switches are played up for shock value and to show us interesting zoo animals instead of human beings.

Very real and common and normal experiences that people have when they have a CDD are mocked, made fun of, disbelieved. If you have "weird" names, you are mocked. Alters are treated as fascinating characters to be treated like play dolls. Polyfragmented systems who are incredibly large are disbelieved and mocked and fake-claimed.

People will join system servers meant to be safe spaces for supporting systems are instead raided by bullies and ableists who screenshot messages and post them online, laughing and mocking and making fun of very real, valid, and even common and normal experiences that people with CDDs can have.

People with CDDs simply cannot exist as themselves, as who they truly are.

You are not helping me or anyone with CDDs by doing nothing but screaming and yelling at endos and harassing them and making fun of them and talking about how much you hate them 😐 You would do better channeling that energy into actually caring about people with CDDs by showing us support, caring about us, educating yourself and others, sharing resources, spreading positivity.

[idiomagic]

As a 55 year old nonbinary ace who has spent the past 40 years or so protesting, volunteering, campaigning...you know, out on the street doing the actual work? When the fuck did 'liberal' become a bad word? Every online 'leftist' I've encountered has hated 'liberals' way more than they do actual fascists and nazis and Republicans. Being terminally online and 'radical' for clicks and an endorphin rush is not being an activist. All the 'liberals' I know I've met because they were out in the real world, doing the real work. Y'all call us 'ineffective', and worse, but it's us old weirdos in our pink pussy hats who are out in the streets, at the airports, keeping ICE from deporting our neighbors, feeding the homeless, volunteering at shelters, showing up at town halls and school board meetings, doing the work. I don't give two fucks what label you put on me, or use for yourself. But until I see you out in the world doing the work, keep your praxis to yourself and read some goddamned books.

If you wanna know what kinds of trans rights activist you are dealing with, don’t just look at whether they’re using the right language and know the word ‘intersectionality’. Also take a look at whether they ever focus on material things.

Non-material are things like, being accepted by your loved ones, being adressed with the right pronouns, positive representation.

Material is things like acces to health care (covered by insurance and without gate keepers), housing (that we can’t be evicted from for being trans), jobs (that we can’t be fired from for being trans), safety.

If someone is only ever fighting for non-material things and has no specific demands for the material improvement of trans lives, they’re a liberal trans activist. They may not even realize it themselves, but this is what liberalism does. It sprinkles rainbows everywhere and ignores the material nature of our oppression.

The liberal approach to activism is tempting because it brings lots of little success stories. Politicians trying to look ‘progressive’ LOVE the non-material list because calling someone by their pronouns, meeting with a transgender celebrity and hosting a book presentation for a transfriendly childrens book doesn’t require any significant part of their budget. It’s free positive publicity. That’s why they’ll cosy up to liberal activists and will ignore our material needs. The moment we start asking for things that really keep us alive like housing and health care, we’re the inconvenient extremist fringe.

[iamnmbr3]

What draco thought and felt when he realized hinny are dating? (i know he's about to die and can't think of this stuff lollll..plus harry just cut him open😂😭) but still even for a second what he thought?

AND

How would draco have behaved or what he said about this if he was not in mission and still a brat(tho sad for his father)?

Draco: the dark lord wants to kill me and my whole family. my only hope of survival is an impossible task that i can't possibly succeed at. and i've realized i don't WANT to succeed at it either. but im trapped. it's too late. there's no way out. becoming a death eater was a mistake. im questioning my whole identity and every life choice i've ever made. i hate myself more than i can say. i look into the mirror and feel disgust. i almost died on the floor in a bathroom and part of me feels i deserve it. and im in agony from these cursed wounds. this week could not possibly get worse.

Pansy: did you hear potter's going out with that weasley girl?

Draco: ... it got worse.

As for what would have happened under normal circumstances, I think much like when Harry was dating Cho, Draco wouldn't have commented on it. Probably because it would bother him too much and not be something he could derive any satisfaction out of taunting Harry over. He'd try to ignore it or pretend it wasn't happening. But inside he'd be hurt and jeaous and trying to ignore the reason why.

[make-friends-with-the-rats]

Take this yap card!!

Feel free to yap about whatever in extensive detail:)

:O

for me?

I'll spare you Victor Hugo level yapping on some random subject and instead talk about how the musical adaptation of newsies took something away from every major character from the original.

Now, I've said several times before that I do not have any hate for the newsies musical and I really do mean it. If you've been here for a while you should know that I really do love the uk production and tutsies, but ultimately I prefer the 1992 movie. Really, I just think that Harvey Fierstein ran into the exact same problem in his adaptation that Kenny Ortega did two decades prior: newsies is just too complex a story with too many multifaceted characters to fit comfortably into a two hour runtime.

I think Fierstein tried too hard to make it fit and in the process had to cut important aspects of several characters. Namely: Jack, David, Medda, Sarah, Denton, Racetrack, and Crutchy. (For now we'll skip over the fact that most of the original ensemble was replaced.)

Beginning with the most obvious cut, Sarah and Denton were replaced with Katherine Plumber/Pulitzer. I personally really love Katherine as a character in her own right, but I think the issue with her replacing Sarah and Denton is that she is an attempt at combining two characters who serve two very different purposes. And the purpose that I think Katherine ends up serving turns out to be something very different too.

Denton is more than just a reporter who decides to report on the newsies strike, he is representative of all of the real adults who supported and aided the 1899 strike. If you aren't too familiar with the history of the 1899 strike, the newsboys' rally at Irving Hall was literally sponsored by the NY state senator, Timothy D. Sullivan (who by the way had once been a newsboy himself). The newsboys (and girls) had a lot of support from adults, and Denton in the film is helping the newsboys not because he's itching to further his career but because he truly believes from the start that the strike is an important story worth writing about. Yes, he gets reassigned and 'betrays' the strike, but he never stops encouraging the newsies to fight for their cause even when he feels he himself no longer can.

Denton is also very important in David's development as a character because Denton's betrayal (which comes before Jack's) is what really forces David to lead and to stop relying on other people to speak for him.

Sarah's purpose is to connect the strike to the other child workers (though admittedly, this isn't very well executed.) Sarah is the one who, in the aftermath of Jack scabbing and in the middle of her brother's anger, discovers Denton's article and becomes a catalyst for the Newsies Banner. It is she who realizes that the strike is so much bigger than Jack and her brother and she who understands it's impact better than anyone else because she's seen both the impact of child labor (being a newsie was actually a pretty good occupation in comparison to the jobs and working conditions of other kids) and the passion that Jack and the strike inspires first hand.

Again, Sarah's role in the film isn't as fleshed out as it should have been because so many of her scenes were cut, but when you fill in the blanks with context clues or by looking back at the scripts and what was cut, the purpose of her character becomes clear.

Keeping all of this in mind, Katherine isn't an adult like Denton and she isn't a child worker like Sarah. Katherine is very different from the both of them and brings an entirely different purpose to the story simply because she is her own character. And this isn't a bad thing by any means, but the meaning that Denton and Sarah brought to the story is lost by not including them. Katherine doesn't really 'replace' Denton and Sarah. So, to get the most out of Newsies, it shouldn't be Denton and Sarah or Katherine. It should be Denton and Sarah and Katherine.

Moving on to Jack and David, what these characters lose in adaptation is pretty similar. Jack visually loses his cowboy hat and bandana which might not seem like a big deal, but it is when you consider what these things represent. Jack's dream of Santa Fe in the film isn't about Santa Fe at all and Santa Fe itself is simply a form of escapism. It's a child's dream. The idealistic dream of a boy who's lost his family and is running from both his past and his fears. Jack also loses his moral ambiguity. In the musical, Jack isn't lying about his name or his family. His family hardly ever comes up and he freely tells Crutchie about his dad. In a way, the musical doesn't let Jack be a child. And not just because he's played by a grown man.

The musical sets Jack up to be misunderstood, he stole food and clothing to help his friends and dreams about Santa Fe because he wants something more out of his life. Yeah, that's fair. That's actually really darn reasonable. Jack isn't a scared little boy anymore, he's a young man who acts with a degree of maturity and clear moral intelligence. I don't like that change.

To me, Jack is seventeen and he feels trapped. He feels like he's suffocating. He has no family and he's left vulnerable because of their loss. 'Cowboy' is a façade to hide his fear. The musical just doesn't portray this as well as the original did.

David also loses a kind of childishness in the musical. Musical David (or Davey) scolds his brother for not wanting to go back to school/thinking being a newsie is better than school. Meanwhile in the film, Mayer Jacobs scolds David for expressing a similar sentiment. Maybe this change was simply to compensate for the exclusion of Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs and somebody had to say that David and Les were going back to school for plot reasons, but it's still at the expense of David. David isn't a parent. At the youngest he's fifteen, and at the oldest he's seventeen. He should be allowed to be selfish. He should be allowed to daydream about leaving school behind and doing something significant, or of being the 'man of the house' like his father. David should also be allowed to get angry and the musical robs him of that opportunity. Katherine's 'betrayal' doesn't effect Davey the way Denton's did and from what we see Jack's betrayal didn't effect him much either. He's disappointed, but he's not allowed to lash out. He's level-headed and reasonable and he knows that the show must go on. He isn't allowed to be impulsive, he isn't allowed to make mistakes, and he isn't important enough for other characters to have to earn his forgiveness.

Now you might be wondering how Medda's character loses anything from film to musical. First, we have to agree that there are really two Meddas. The first Medda is 'Miss Medda Lark[son/in] the Swedish Meadowlark' and the other Medda is the lady behind the stage name.

When Medda is on the stage, she's simply putting on a show. That's her job, after all, and we see this in both the film and the musical. What changes is the Medda we see in between her performances. Both Meddas very clearly care for Jack and the newsies and they are both given moments to show this. However, like the loss of Denton, the musical doesn't give Medda a moment where we see the injustice of how other adults treat the newsies in comparison to Medda. There's a heartbreaking scene in the original film where Medda, in the chaos at the rally, slaps a thug who's attacking Racetrack before she's dragged off the stage and out of harms way. "He's just a child! Can't you see that?" she screams. It's a case of an adult defending the newsies and shows us that these other adults are in the wrong. It's a small thing, but we just don't have an equivalent scene in the stage adaptation. Medda very clearly supports the newsies, but she's never given a scene that lets her directly challenge the adults who are actively harming and silencing the newsies, and I think that's a loss.

Finally, Racetrack and Crutchy(/ie) are both watered down. Racetrack's snark and serious side were projected onto the stage character Albert, leaving Racetrack himself to be mostly portrayed as comic relief. His older brotherly attitude towards Les is also lost.

Crutchy also looses his snark. His is more subtle, but it was still important because Crutchy isn't just a happy-go-lucky ball of sunshine. Remember when Crutchy snarked the Delancey brothers? Remember when he spat in Snyder's sauerkraut? Remember when he told Snyder to make friends with the rats? He also loses the line "I don't want nobody carrying me. Never, ya hear?" It's so important that Crutchy had pride, that he didn't want his friends to pity him or treat him any differently because of his disability. It's so important that his friends respected him and never did, even if they were just trying to help out of love for their friend. It's so important that Crutchy was defiant, that he fought back in his own ways.

There's just so much that wasn't included or explored in the stage musical in regard to the primary characters and it leaves them with less of themselves.

[bigdamnproject]

Snowglobe

Three years ago @polkadotpatterson wrote me a very lovely and kind gift fic, Snowglobe, about my Blaseball son, Jasper Coven. I've been thinking about him this last week, and coincidently on the fic's anniversary. Jasper had to go west, far from home, into the Frozen Sky, sent there by his mentor and surrogate sister, Kiki Familia. For what, he'd know when he saw it. Jasper's story is about going far from home, landing in a new place, and trying to find a place (and badly wanting to be a credit to the team, and to Kiki).

Tomorrow I'm leaving the midwest, where I was born and raised, and going back to the Pacific Northwest, a place I love, but hasn't been home to me in five years. We saw how the election went, and how Missouri was shaping up, and we decided we couldn't stay. It's hard to stay in a place that doesn't love you back. I love my home town, St. Louis, deeply, and I'm angry that it has to be in a state that hates me.

So tomorrow we're heading west. I'm sad to leave my home, but the way Jasper's story goes, he does become a credit to the team, he does make Kiki proud, and he does find a home. I know we will. I'm just not happy about it right now.

[borderline-culture-is]

Bpd + avpd culture is just

Kinda stopping yourself from trying to get too close to anyone at all

Your done with what you can do and just overall give up and trying to become close friends

Sure I have initials in my discord bio telling that I love these people but that's just to make me feel good about myself and have some sort of connection to anyone

.. But I know ghats not true and I will just shive them away if they get too close to me in any single way possible.

Oh well, I like avoiding my problems and hate people who try and point them out so I just run away

I've done it too many times so what the fuck?

-🎭🔇

.

[courtfallen]

𝔳𝔶𝔯𝔬𝔰 𝔴𝔞𝔱𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔰 𝔥𝔢𝔯 𝔰𝔦𝔩𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔪𝔦𝔰𝔱 𝔢𝔶𝔢𝔰 alit by the flame with which she lights her cigarette, and taps the forgotten stem of his pipe on the outside of his thigh. idle, rapt, content with the easy back-and-forth of the conversation, aware of the precarious shift of his consciousness into that higher place. it is only conversations like these that allow him to forget his corporeal form, let it linger down in the stoneworld while the rest of him, the soul of him, haunts the peripherals, the corridors beyond.

❝ did you choose to be the cautionary tale, or was that fate thrust upon you — the fate of the wraith & madman you claim to be? this only solidifies the point i've made: we, as we sit, are only the remnants, the fragments, of what we've experienced. and perhaps i could not have walked the same paths as you. i grant you that. but the paths before us materialize based on how heavy our footfalls are, the shape of us, the spirit of us — and i don't believe we have any choice in the becoming of those things. we may only know how we wield what we have become either with the impeccability of mindfulness, or with sheer abandon, giving ourselves up to whim and urge. ❞

vyros looks away from those otherworldly eyes to tend to his pipe, but the vision of them looking back are seared into his mind's eye. it's like looking into an empty mirror, a reflective pool that offers no answer or image. only endlessness, the void that tears apart the self. a question blooms in him as he goes to follow her example and re-light his pipe, and it is thusly forgotten again.

❝ your eyes, ❞ he begins with trepidation, daring to meet her gaze once more. ❝ do they reflect the cauldron and all in the realm of its making? or is your a gaze only a reflection of the bite you took from its essence? the cold emptiness of you, amplified? ❞ because that's what he sees in her — and perhaps when all had been taken from her and she was stripped of herself, that was all that's left.

❝ do you think that's what the cauldron is? infinite, cold emptiness. ❞ if so, how did they come from it? is that what they were made of, all of them? a mirror shattered, reflecting itself infinitely through countless experiences, perspectives, views?

❝ hate is love gone wrong, ❞ he muses. ❝ or was it not your lover that tricked you into the cauldron's arms? ❞

her reply is thoughtful. finally, he lifts his pipe to his lips and draws, filling his lungs, the embers of dried leaves fierce as he does so. ❝ so you have accepted who you are, embraced it? ... then you are as crystalized as the elements. unchangeable. ❞ the thought stills him, for it's a tormenting state he cannot imagine. ❝ that sounds like hell to me. ❞

AS FAR as evenings in this damned place went, she had definitely had worse ones. Less interesting, less reflective & introspective - & inspective. She did not miss the cold glare of a tragedy worn warrior, but her own temper matches his - & is at times less easy to control. She lacks the training of a warrior, the brutality of the Illyrian camp & their Blood Rite, but, ah! Did she not have a rite of her own? Did she not walk upon mountains & mountains of flesh & gore, of corpses & wails?

she had walked upon the soil with feet that made the earth bleed back, walking through marshes of blood & despair until she was graciously given a place to call her home?

As if Prythian had ever been her home. As if her making was similar to a charmed dream upon the field of poppies & daisies & pegasi dancing on rainbows. As if her nature had been anything other than filled with hatred & violence & darkness itself.

She merely smiles to him, allowing the molten ore others called eyes to turn metallic, pale & misty, full of Cauldron's smoke & it's cold, icy voice.

"The Dead me would stomach nothing of this place. The Dead me should have never been here in the first place. But, alas - " she pauses with a shrug, "those choices were not my own. The Dead me had long since had her existence ended & changed. Perhaps you would not have been able to stomach things I had to see."

but, she wouldn't argue about it.

"I am the cautionary tale, though to which kind it remains to be seen." Vivian responds with a laugh, a soft one, taking a drag of the cigarette seemingly forgotten - the ember nearly singeing her pale fingers.

Discarding the butt of it to the pocket realm that led to the Dawn quarter's room, she summoned another cigarette & lit it, listening to the Illyrian fae speak.

"I had been something else & look where it got me. A half wraith, half madman serving a lord she cares little of." she chuckled, head tilted to the side. The eeriness ebbed, only by a fragment, as they conversed. Often, she would allow herself the full power of the Cauldron's kiss to manifest through her - allow the fae to see why making mortals into immortals was forbidden. Not because of an ancient treaty no one really remembered or remembered to care about - but, because it was deadly. it amplified.

her hatred had been multiplied by a thousand-fold.

"If we are all sides of the same stone, than what are we? A lover & a hater?" she snorted in amusement, but she understood the point.

Looking at things from that angle, she could see his reasoning, but that was the whole point of the debate, was it not? To see one's opinion & accept it - though not necessarily agree with it. They seemed to have agreed about their free will to some extent. Her rage refused to allow her to be a marionette, for she had been one, a lovesick one, & look where it had gotten her. Was her lover to blame, was she to blame, or was the Cauldron the one that wanted her Made?

she couldn't say for sure but... she would bet on the Cauldron. it liked her too much.

"You speak of mortal hermits, Illyrian." Vivian noticed with a grin on her lips, "The fae are not that magnanimous. I am not that magnanimous. My Making has been filled with the essence of hatred, of all things that prowl the dark. How am I suppose to be anything but such? Had I been a creature of light, it would've drowned me, or Made me a priestess. Instead, it turned me into this." she said, allowing the molten ore back to her gaze, the silver paleness glowing against the darkening sky.

"A hefty reward for what it made me endure."

[bumblingbabooshka]

Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.