#this took many years off my life
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took forever but its finally done <3
this was my first attempt at formula 1 art and i would say it turned out pretty good :))))
#im so late to the party but that's alright#this took many years off my life#in a joyous way#land norris#mclaren f1#lando norris miami#miami gp 2024#lando norris art#digital art#formula 1#f1
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Shen Qingqiu/Shen Jiu wearing a pretty dress because I said so („• ֊ •„)੭
#svsss#mxtx#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#this took so many years off my life span but it was sooo worth it#danmei#pookie deserves pretty things#and i will give them to him#sqq#og sqq
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sunset horse riding
#this is based after the Great Basin desert in my home state of Nevada#as someone who was born in Nevada I feel like I have to draw horseback riders under a sunset sky at least once in my life lmao#those clouds took so many years off of my life…#chrobin#fire emblem#chrom fire emblem#fire emblem awakening#fire emblem engage#robin fire emblem#m!chrobin#fire emblem kakusei#fe13#fire emblem heroes#chrom x robin#male robin#male robin fire emblem#insert brokeback Mountain joke here
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#well#this took so many years off my life#i could've lived a great life never seeing this#throwing my phone into a river and dropping off the face of the earth#life is strange#chloe price#max caulfield#lis#pricefield
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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Hear me out:
Kotoko adopted Es, and Fuuta went ballistic.
Rip Fuuta... he can never catch a break... Asdfsdf thank you for this, it was a blast thinking of all the ridiculous ways this could have played out! (One possibility I toyed with was Fuuta's competitive instincts take over, he fights her for Es, only to realize too late "*I* don't want to be responsible for a whole child WAIT") It's a similar format to the last one, with a knock-at-the-door reveal, but I still think it works 😂
“Don’t fuck with me, Es.”
“I would never.”
Lying brat. Fuuta knew they would every chance that they got. It was the reason he was so relieved that Es decided to find somewhere else to live after Milgram’s end. Fuuta had nothing left to fear from his former warden, but the others’ suggestions that Es become his new roommate still made him shudder. Three interrogations in a closed space with the rude kid were enough for him, thank you very much.
However, it wasn’t all a relief. He couldn’t help feeling concerned about who they’d gone to live with. Given how cryptic they were being, Fuuta would have been convinced they walked into the woods to find a furry family of Jackalopes or something to raise them –except, they showed up for this walk with clean clothing and internet access.
“I don’t believe you. You’re fucking with me right now. Why can’t you just tell me who it is?”
“It isn’t any of your concern. Hey, I thought you swore to stay out of others’ business. You turned over a new leaf and all that?”
“Tch. I meant other people’s business. You’re different.”
If Es had vanished off the grid like some of the other prisoners, Fuuta wouldn’t have cared. But they were here, near enough to arrange some lame meetup, which meant they were going to remain in his life for a while longer. And that meant, as the model citizen that Fuuta was, he felt responsible for ensuring they didn’t get themselves kidnapped by some creep.
He asked, “how much do you know about them, anyway? I mean, what kind of person can house a random weird kid on incredibly short notice? That’s definitely suspicious.”
Fuuta pulled the mask up on his face as they turned down a more crowded street. He knew people were going to gawk at his eye anyways, but it still helped him feel like he was blending in. With his thoughts on the injury for a moment, he was glad that bitch Kotoko was one of the prisoners who had gone off the grid. Good riddance.
“I promise, she’s fine. Not weird with children at all. In fact, she’s really good with them, which is why she could help me on such short notice.” They muttered, “but it’s not like I’m that young…”
“That’s still not normal. Is she some old housewife or something?”
“Ah, are you trying to do the interrogation this time? Actually, I’d say she’s around your age.”
“It’s just you two living alone? I’m still worried about Milgram coming looking for us again – can a girl like that really protect you?”
“Is everyone supposed to live with a big, strong man, like you?”
“Wha–!” Fuuta’s cheeks burned red. “That’s not what I –!”
“I’m only teasing. It’s cute that you care about me.”
That only agitated him more. “It’s not cute! I’m being realistic! One of us has to think about your safety while you’re just distracted by some pretty girl.”
“What makes you think she’s pretty?”
“Well, why else would you be so careless in deciding to live with her?”
All of the sudden, he saw it in Es’ eyes: that spark of mischief that Fuuta had come to loathe. He could never tell what they were plotting, but it was never a good sign.
Es held up their hands in mock surrender. They put on a ridiculous, overdramatic voice. “Ah, you caught me, Fuuta! I’m hiding her identity because she’s the most beautiful, capable woman in all of Japan, and I want to keep her all to myself!”
He groaned, but they weren’t deterred. “She’s got everything, I couldn’t risk you falling for her! She’s quite capable of defending me. She’s very strong, with protective instincts much like your own. She understands our situation like no one else could. She’s got intense eyes, and you wouldn’t believe her singing voice. She enjoys deep conversations, she’s a dog person, she –”
“ – now you’re being the creep! Just shut up, I get it already...”
When they finally had the decency to pull it together, they reassured him. “It’s all true, though. So there’s no need to worry about me. I’m in good hands.”
Good hands, his ass. In only a brief conversation, the caretaker had gone from sounding a little suspicious to sounding way too good to be true… meaning she was extremely suspicious.
“Maybe someday I’ll introduce you, if you’re lucky...”
He turned his eyes away. “At least let me run some background checks on her first.”
(He would just stalk her on social media, but that still counted.)
“You’re just going to stalk her on social media. That doesn’t count.”
“Eh? I have legit methods!” He hid deeper under his mask.
Even after the topic was dropped, after he and Es parted ways on an awkward goodbye, Fuuta was left thinking about this mystery woman. It took a bit of digging (and maybe a tiny bit of social media stalking) but at last he found where Es lived with this stranger. Contrary to what they may believe, he had turned over a new leaf. There would be no more hiding behind screens or letting others do the confrontation for him. Now that he was a changed person, he’d do the healthy and normal thing with this information: he’d march on down there himself and confront her like a man.
He made it all the way to the front door with his chin high. He knocked with confidence.
Then he began to shift nervously. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get the woman’s description out of his head. Sure, he was here to check on Es, but if someone happened to check him out at the same time, it was only right to be prepared… He straightened his shirt collar. He ran his fingers through his hair. He wondered if he should have covered up his eye to look more presentable.
The door swung open.
The surprise on Kotoko’s face was nowhere near the amount on Fuuta’s.
“Oh, for fucks sake –!”
From somewhere behind her, Es’ laughter rang out.
#milgram#fuuta kajiyama#es#kotoko yuzuriha#the informal narration voice was a bit more than i usually do - i hope it wasnt too cheesy because i thought it was a ton of fun aasdfsdfs#in the first one it was cool to write kazui as avoiding naming shidou for pretty good reasons (he doesnt want to make amane upset and he#genuinely has a hard time talking about liking men after so many years of secrecy)#however. es has no such reasons. they are a little troll and their favorite activity is messing with fuuta. this is the most fun theyve#had all week. they actually hoped they could keep the lie up for a little longer.#i picture kotoko has chilled out a lot post-milgram BUT upon finding out fuuta once again tracked down a childs address she chases him off#(with es still dying in the background)#i firmly believe that bisexual fuuta my beloved would Not be immune to the idea of kotoko......#thank you for the request!!! adfsdf i hope you enjoyed#it took a hot second to write down but i was cracking up thinking about it the whole time#for the other adoption idea i figured i could spin it so fuutas government-job father had connections to help him get custody paperwork#but he doesnt come out and say what he needs it for so his dad just thinks his son is finally getting his life together and helping#someone else in need -- and fuuta himself doesnt realize right away that he just adopted a whole ass kid out of spite 💀#drabbles
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For the ask thingy!
24: what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?
mmmmm unironically. Making the friends I have lol I'm sappy
#not an art#It's both the best thing I ever did for myself and also it took a lot of effort#I used to have like 0 friends and be generally considered off-putting as a child#Then I made a very deliberate effort to learn how to socialize in a way that got results and look at me now!#I have SO many excellent people in my life. Thank you 14 year old me for being just creepy enough to work it
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New vampire girlfriend just dropped!
#art#digital art#artists on tumblr#my art#original character#oc#those shoes took so many years off my life#vampire#my oc: jun
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not being horny on main rn sorry pls feel free to scroll frfr
i just wanted to talk into a void idk it made me cringe trying 2 write a whole letter to my past self or trying to figure out if i should reach out to someone blah blah. it's easier to put it in a post bc it's way less pressure
tbh just like finally processing emotions that ive been hoarding for more than half my life and im sure it'll be worth it. i think im ready to like grow out of relying on solely on various forms of escapism to get through and focus more on filling my life with the things that make life beautiful
#not snz#notsnz#mentalhealth#ig like it doesnt matter that no adults in my rl gave me guidance at that age bc like im the adult now LMAOOO#i found my diary from age 12-15#reading it was an event#imagining i was talking to a child that wasnt me rlly put it in perspective tho#it took like a decade to get a good therapist and whatnot and ofc i wish it were dif but ik processing & acceptance is key#idk im kinda excited tho like i think i can let go of this nonsense finally#“i think my best years r over” (ur 12) also u have ur own room filled w anime posters and ur watching a r/affi concert w a heating pad#u finally got to play t/tyd bitch!!!! i told u!!!!!! ur life is full of love#two weeks ago u r/eigen a/rataka talked a guy into to knocking off 100 bucks 4 a trumpet purchase what a time to be alive#u found some circles that like u the way u are frfr#u were in the knitting club and like church choir or whatever u were NOT even a problem child they were dramatic#ur so many things and it was ok that you were sad it wasnt even ur fault & ur supposed to be immature bc ur a child
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Reasons why people would get the ick from ac mirage characters according to twitter and tiktok ick lists:
#IM BACK ON MY BULLSHIT <33#ali isnt the toxic masculinity type of aplha male he just Is the alpha of any group hes in. self proclaimed too#the banu musa brothers have the same personality to me they r just the same person#looking at so many ick lists took 40 years off my life#i swear 99% of these i found on an actual ick list somewhere#some of them i couldnt find good ones for so i just went based off vibes. u know Nur would paint his nails#im very sorry if any of these make you insecure but i tried to find the most outlandish ones#some of them r valid but others i chose bc theyre silly and some are just straight up jokes im pretty sure#ac#ac mirage#assassins creed mirage#assassin's creed#beshi#ali#basim#tabid#rebekah#rayhan#roshan#fuladh#nur#dervis#banu musa brothers#kong#nehal#god damn i did not expect to b gone this long lol !!! whoops !! i was doing human things. if u even care#i will b in everyones notes soon 🫡
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Cable topping Wade (In a fight? In a fight.)
#my art#digital art#deadpool#wade wilson#nathan summers#cablepool#blood#but like its mild#this took so many years off my life#rated x for violence 😉
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they’re engaged 💍
i like how the sketch turned out, so here:
#my art#fire emblem engage#alear#alcryst#alearcryst#this took 10 years off my life#orz#too many details#i just want alcryst to be happy
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⟣ ateez ⟡ 230112 ⟡ halazia ⟢
#tw flashing#ateez#ateez ot8#ateez gifs#ateez ot8 gifs#this set took YEARS off my life and so many adjustment layers...yet nothing matches </33333#*ot8s#kazgifs#atzsource#lunanuggets#heyiri#heyfio#tuserjazzy#tusersofie#tuserchrissy#marieblr#jonghomies#baekwin#useryukuz#lucieblr#usersrin#meganbyte#yunhwalovebot#jennahui#forbelleseyes#kazgifs.ot8#this is ass im almost embarrassed to tag u my beloved moots DDJDKS#bad cuts the camerawork was awful....no cohesive colouring despite 9+ adjustment layers per gifs....#i had to colour every single one individually because the lighting changed so much i hate it FJFKF
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.
#if i'm quiet it's bc i'm still processing#i haven't reached the acceptance point pointvand i can't be glib or funny about it#i keep just starting to full-on sob#like a lot of it is selfish - comparatively i'm better off than many and not much will change right away#but i'm old. i'm not super sure i'll make it another 4 years like i just have this feeling i won't#and i'm crying for the loss of what we could have had as much as for all of those who will die#it's almost worse that there was a clear way forward that we took in a better timeline#i'm crying because there's proof that so much of this country is evil and stupid and arrogant and apathetic#huge swathes of it are not but we have to admit that there are a lot of the others#it really is grief for the united states of america that existed and it's selfish and not helpful and i can't stop it yet#today someone i work with really ssid to me 'y'all really think trump is gonna send people to your house and take you away'#and i said he told us he would - he said he would specifically target immigrants and received the reply#'well yeah of course - the illegals ...'#so many folks are already setting their sights on the next fight and ready to roll up their sleeves and keep pushing#and i just can't stop crying#palestine is gone. the supreme court is locked for the rest of my life. who knows if there will ever even be another election#maybe that was the last one. maybe that was the last one women will be able to vote in. who knows.#i remember this feeling from when my parents died but i'm not any better dealing with it now than i was then
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OC HALLOWEEN CHALLENGE 2023
Day 23: The Apocalypse Is The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me
Riley Parrish always knew that her family was haunted by their past demons, literally. She knew that one day, the work they did daily to save the world would come back to bite them in the ass. It was merely a year after they had defeated the hunters out to destroy all supernaturals, that just that happened.
It was a demon overlord who successfully ended the world as we knew it - just like that. Suddenly, Riley and her best friends, Marlow Stilinski and Nixie Baker, found themselves alone in Beacon Hills, their families, friends, and significant others suddenly all dead.
As the girls try to understand their new normal and navigate a world without many humans left, Riley knows she must find a way to go back in time and change the chain of events that led to their despair.
Years go by and as Riley is still trying out every concoction of spells and potions and rituals to change things, Marlow begins to lose her will to live without her loved ones, and Nixie seems to thrive in the Apocalypse. The work is hard and not having any help is harder, but Riley knows it can't stay this way. Something has to be done.
COLORING
TAGLIST: @waterloou @eddysocs @ocs-supporting-ocs @foxesandmagic @veetlegeuse @decennia @hiddenqveendom @arrthurpendragon @luucypevensie @richitozier @noratilney @wordspin-shares @oneirataxia-girl @endless-oc-creations @lucys-chen @andromedalestrange @far-shores @daughter-of-melpomene @bibaybe
#ohc2023#ocappreciation#ocapp#teen wolf oc#oc: riley parrish#oc: marlow stilinski#oc: nixie baker#yes hello this took way too many years off my life#it doesn't seem worth it for no one to even look at it anyways#sorry for sounding ungrateful; going through a thing
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If i remember correctly the nov16th streams ended before/around midnight in my timezone, but i stayed up late into the night. I remember how everyone was buzzing with excitement for HOURS. (there has truly never been anything like that era to me ever since, i can't imagine i'll ever feel like that again) When i woke up in the morning i was still in shock, first thing i did was sit down and crochet a bee i have still not finished to this day
#this is the most nostalgic i've ever felt for a fandom#it ACHES#so many people just went away since. where the fuck is Manlet for example. bunch of other people too. god what the fuck#wasnt even that good. the discoursé took years off my life. but YES IT WAS ALSO THAT GOOD#i stayed tik the boat sank and i still have one leg on it#idk if i can get into qsmp ngl? would take me ages to chatch up#plus theres my comic list that i dont wanna abandon like i definietly would if i started something new...#and theres MY SCHOOLWORK LMAFAO
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