#this post is so long oh my gosh

[cowardlykrow]

"That is where you are wrong, my boy!"

@ratb4stard3 and I deliver another Cowardlyghostbro's(™) collab ✨💛

[lucentmaiden]

⠀⊹﹑⟡ tennant tumblr layout && divs ⏆ ˖ ⌑

⠀═╪ ⭒७ requested by ᎓ @luvvpinkangel ୨୧

✁ * F2U ⏖ reblog ៸ heart if u save or use ｡

✦ ⸼ イ cred not needed but appreciated ⌓⌓

⠀➩ ꪮ don't save the pink divs 、thanks ⁺ ♡

[forgetfulmachineart]

[ID: Blue tinted digital sketches of Gojo Satoru. In the top left he's being pushed back by someone unsee with his arms in the air. In the bottom right, he has a smirk as he points backwards and is partially rendered. In the bottom left and top right spaces, his name is written in space filling letters. /End ID]

Guess who's alive?

(it's me)

[kanasmusings]

[English Subs DL] Banana Fish Stage Play Part 1 & Part 2

Hello, friends~! I come to you this time with English subs for the Banana Fish stage plays~! Thank you to @emerald-trashart for requesting me to do both plays! I had such a blast working on it even though it got a bit overwhelming and heavy at times (because Banana Fish (╥_╥))

The stage play is just so amazing, and beautifully made...! I went into this not knowing what to expect, and I came out of it just mesmerized. If you're familiar with Banana Fish, of course it will be as heavy as its source material, but I think that you would enjoy it! The production did a really great job respecting and staying true to the events of its source, and I think long-time fans would love it ^^

The actors, too...! They were so great at their roles, and gosh the emotions and intensity they portrayed were really convincing. Mizue Kenta and Okamiya Kurumu were so perfect as Ash and Eiji, and their chemistry was just beautiful T^T>

Alright, enough rambling! I'll let the stage play speak for itself! (￣▽￣)

For those who are interested in getting the Blu-rays for themselves, I’ll provide links below~ BD Purchase Links: (From Animate JP) BANANA FISH PART 1 | BANANA FISH PART 2 * Purchase links would require proxy since the BDs are sold-out on CDJapan and were requested through proxy either way. I couldn't find them on Animate International either ^^;

Notes, disclaimers, trigger warnings, and link under the cut, enjoy~! (Long post ahead ^^;)

NOTES:

※ THE FILE IS SUBTITLES ONLY, VIDEO IS NOT INCLUDED!

TRIGGER WARNINGS:

Heavy mentions/depictions of drugs/drug abuse, sexual abuse (rape, pedophilia, child prostitution/pornography, among others), mental disorders/illnesses, gun violence, racism, general gang violence, suicide, death.

Above themes are rampant in both stages, so please watch with caution. If you start feeling uncomfortable or anxious, please take a step back and stop watching until you feel better.

For those who want to start watching the anime after getting into it from the stage play, please refer to these guides for trigger warnings: Twitter | IMDb

MISC. NOTES:

From what I remember, the stage play follows the manga more than the anime (since the anime changed some stuff). So if something from the stage was not in the anime, you can check the manga for them ^^

RULES:

[MOST IMPORTANT] Please DO NOT re-post the subs and the link outside of Tumblr! If you want to share outside, please, please DM me about it and link my blog to your post. That’s all I ask.

Please DO NOT remove my credits.

Please DO NOT re-translate without permission.

SUBS DL LINK: PART 1 | PART 2

※ Please only DM me if there is a problem with the subtitles. I cannot help you if it’s related to the videos. ※ If you enjoyed my work, please consider buying me a coffee here, if you can. It’ll really help me out a lot.(o^▽^o) Thank you!!

[tower-of-deceit]

I LOVE your cute guy design

Thank you :DD

I have quite a bit of unfinished art of him and this au that I want to finish at some point, though for now I can give you this wip ^_^

[peapodsplace]

Hey Baba, it seems like you've been seeing a lot of yucky stuff online right now. A lot of people who aren't remembering their manners and are forgetting that there's people behind a screen. I know you like your screen time but please remember that the world isn't all like that okay? Some people are different online and forget their values and let's remember that these days, algorithms perpously show you things that'll make you upset. Yes, yes it's not very fair, is it sweetheart. Please remember to take some breaks and that the world isn't really like that. It's so important to protect yourself. Yes, silly even if you think you don't deserve it; because you do.

[salt-n-salt]

Hey salt, how is Kendall dressing up for Halloween? Not asking because I'm planning to draw a trio costume with him, Atlas and Shane hahaha... Unless--

im literally so sorry bc as much as i would like to put him in the hottest costume ever this is unfortunately deadass what he would wear. and he would think it’s the coolest thing ever double unfortunately

[hollyjay]

that one scene but it's a storyboard concept of Hey I Don't Work Here by Tom Cardy (listen while looking bc I ain't actually bothering with an animatic lmao). He quite literally does work there but the vibes are right.

Scene being referenced: Anyone on AO3 by @gentrychild (Yami is the pasta 😔)

[thatmaxcontent]

Modern AU Sanuso in a semi-real world? Sign me up :)

[AU RAMBLES DOWN BELOW! Not proof-read in the slightest :D]

They're married and live together with their three dogs. Sanji started his restaurant at 24, living in a small apartment with his then boyfriend Usopp. The other had been doing jobs on and off before he started working on a passion project with saved money. They were pretty broke, up until an ad-campaign Usopp animated for the All Blue restaurant blew up with teenagers and young adults, leading to great growth and success for both the restaurant and Usopp's online store.

The All Blue restaurant expanded, but Sanji didn't open any new locations. From just a restaurant it turned into a hotel, still focused on its food with other services holding up well. The interior had been designed by Usopp, as well as the exterior, according to Sanji's wishes. On the location's 20-year anniversary Usopp and Sanji hosted an event where they told the humble beginnings of the restaurant, bringing in Sanji's adoptive father Zeff to give gratitude to the man who inspired it all. Day and night alike the event was wonderful. Once the married couple reached their comfortable home Sanji allowed his emotions to flow as he fell asleep in Usopp's arms, crying tears of gratitude and giddily joyful disbelief as Onion, Pepper and Carrot (their dogs) cuddled up with them.

Whenever Sanji takes days off and leaves the restaurant in charge of his trusty right hand woman, Pudding, he makes sure to rest himself body to mind. Usopp doesn't have that priviledge, as their home is his working place.

It was only in their thirties that Sanji really realised how much Usopp did around the house, being a stay-at-home worker and all. Every corner was always clean, clothes were washed, fridge and freezer were stocked with ingredients and necessities, dogs were fed, happy, walked and bathed, everything was always in order no matter how it seemed before. It was a norm, but one day as Sanji returned home the house was a little more unkept than usual. This was because Usopp, hard as he tried, could not get out of bed for the first time since teenagehood. From that day on Sanji, who got used to their perfect house, started truly appreciating who made it perfect for them all. He tried to pull Usopp to relax with him whenever he took his days off, realising quite fast the artist couldn't lay back no matter what. Always stiff, aware and awake.

Some time after that realisation Sanji took off a month, something he did a lot of arrangements and work for to make it happen. He convinced Usopp to take that month off as well, after almost a day of debating he finally gave up as they fell asleep on their bed together. Half of that month they traveled to France, to Sanji's hometown to stay at Zeff's. The other half they spent in Thailand, trying out new things and enjoying their time. They were supposed to go visit Usopp's hometown in his home country, but he really didn't want that so instead they visited a destination recommended by a friend and frequent traveler, Nami. After this vacation they returned home, and next time Sanji was talking Usopp into taking a day off with him it didn't take long for a short cuddle-session to start.

Usopp takes commissions every now and then, but mostly he animates shorts and passion projects. He sells his creations, artwork and tailored fashion online, he is also an author as a simple hobby with some published books. He is very often stressed, even though he works for himself he doesn't take kindly to free-time. Whenever he manages to relax, if ever, he prefers a plate of Karelian pies with some egg-butter on top to be by his side as he binges a show. Chugging water and pear juice, he thinks about fresh stories and new projects even while he's supposed to be laying back. The only things that can truly make him rest his mind are Carrot, Pepper and Onion spending time with him and Sanji being his silly Sanji self (which Usopp finds unbearably sexy in a non-sexual way for some reason).

Even though they've been married for 23 years (Sanji at 50 and Usopp at 48) the only thing that's changed is majority of their priority list. It's no longer "I want to spend all my time with you", rather "I want to savor and love you for each moment I have you". They have their own lives, own groups, own events, own plans, but the smallest things will make them get all lovey-dovey with each other.

"Starboy, did you vaccuum the mats?" Sanji would ask, and the moment Usopp replies; "Yeah, I found some spare time.", the older will be with his arms lovingly placed around the younger, drowning him in light cheek-kisses and sweet whispered nothings.

"Loverboy, did you buy this potted plant?" Usopp would inquire, and the moment Sanji replies; "Yes, I thought it could fill the place of the former one.", he is already watching as the artist cares for the plant before giving the cook a long kiss of gratitude.

They met at a vocational school in Finland, where Usopp was a second-yearer at 17/18 and Sanji a first-yearer at 19/20. Sanji studied at the Restaurant-Catering side, while Usopp was forwarding Art studies. Sanji graduated in two and a half years while Usopp had to stay up until four. It was at the end of Sanji's second year that he confessed to Usopp, he wanted to seem cool and romantic but instead stumbled on his words while they were spending time at a mall. They had both moved into Usopp's own apartment at around Sanji's first year, but now as they both returned it was different. Their dumb nicknames weren't so dumb anymore, but seeing one another naked was still as awkward (and uncomfortable for Usopp) as ever. Even so they felt comfortable enough to sleep next to each other that night (in the literal sense, nothing more 👽).

Sanji is in contact with his siblings, who were also adopted by Zeff, to this day. Usopp sometimes looks at old videos of his biological father's, Yasopp's, Olympic Records and other sports performances. Though he keeps a picture of both an archery and sharp-shooting record Yasopp still holds the gleam in his eyes isn't exactly happy whenever that unfamiliar face enters his vision.

I love these two very dearly :) almost as dearly as they love each other 💕✌️👽✨️

[reminiscentrainclouds]

I am a guy who can get So emotionally attached to fictional characters.

[nosferslotu]

He really is. Man said ‘watch this’ and then made a big dramatic entrance and sent a neonate to the shadow realm because he can’t act right and that’s everyone else’s problem I guess 🙄

Mithras come get your man he’s scaring the kids.

But for a more “in-depth” answer

The chronicle I’m currently running takes place in 2008. While the chronicle itself is set in Salt Lake City, Utah- (weird choice I know but I promise it makes sense in lore) - during the course of the chronicle the Family Reunion occurred in Italy, officially creating the hecata as of November 27th 2008 (thanksgiving. Haha)

None of the coterie in the game proper really know about this event, however, leading up to it Doctor Whitchapel, a Giovanni “jump and dump” (almost serial killer victim who managed to scratch some of her attackers blood and swallow it as he tried to dissect her) had started having weird “dreams” during daysleep that all had this man in them.

(Art by @ro-esma another of my wonderful players)

Whitchapel is convinced that this man is her guilt anthropomorphized as a man who wears a deer mask (because her dad made her kill a deer when she was younger) when in actuality this man is Vergil De Camden. A harbinger of ashur who Roger rescued from the shroud after he was trapped in there during the Cappadocian purge and fell victim to the Rot. Leaving him trapped from 1680 until his rescue about three months ago after Augustus Giovanni’s death caused a malestrom that ‘uncovered’ a lot of buried Cappadocians.

Roger, who as we know lost his husband, has been using this search and rescue mission to bury those feelings and prove to himself that if he can rescue the harbingers, surely he can save his husband too, right? In particular, Roger is attempting to locate his Childer Maria, who is considered to be the last Cappadocian and was ‘killed’ by Ambrogino Giovanni. Roger’s blood brother and all around great guy! (Aside from the genocide and the diablerie and the-)

(This is ambrogino btw. Real nice sort)

Problem is. At the family reunion it was revealed that Vergil, whose body had rotted in the shadowlands, had the- wrong face- when it was remade. Resulting in him looking like ambrogino’s grandson Cassius, who died during the purge as collateral damage.

(Vergil took this news well as you can see. Yes I’ve posted this meme before but it’s MY PAGE and I’ll use whatever visuals I WANT TO)

Ambrogino decided to ‘get back’ at Roger (cause the genocide and killing his childer and their shared sire wasn’t enough I guess) and after a very bad roll by Roger to resist ambrogino’s discipline, he started getting derangements of seeing Maria, redoubling his need to find her and bring her back. (Healthy relationship with death Mr. Clan of death enjoyer)

Problem is. Whitchapel looks like Maria. And Vergil hadn’t told Roger he was visiting her.

So as whitchapel was “dreaming” Roger de Camden, very hinged, tracked down Vergil and found her there talking to him.

Caught up in a derangement and convinced that this was clearly some Giovanni ambrogino had planted there to trick vergil and take him like he had everyone else Roger loved- he- without waiting for ANY context or ANY input from VERGIL WHO WAS THERE, Used a homebrew discipline power called Wages of Death, which makes a victim relive the death of a wraith the user has on hand or was present for.

So basically. Roger broke in wearing what looks like a plague mask, told whitchapel if “you want to wear her face? Fine, you can die her death” and then literally made her relive Maria’s murder at the hands of ambrogino. All in front of Vergil and without asking even 1 question first. (Suffice it to say Vergil is returning that #1 Dad mug. )

Whitchapel took 3 agg willpower damage and after feeling herself get Uber murdered, watched Vergil and Roger shouting over it before Vergil walked over to her and said “I think you should go home doctor” right before the sun set and she woke up back in SLC.

So now she’s haunted by the death of a woman she’s never heard of. And is convinced that this is some elaborate nightmare in which Roger De Camden is Death himself and has come to cast judgement and damn her to hell, and that Vergil is his son who is interceding on her behalf due to her own deep set desire to still possibly earn redemption.

And Roger is currently trying to save all his good China from Vergil, who is throwing it all at him.

TLDR; elders be eldering. Roger fill out this new patient paperwork please.

Tell me about your chronicles immediately 👀👀👀

@kentuckycaverats @nosferslotu

[mckinlily]

Um, okay this is a loaded question, and if you want to play it safe, you can answer me in DMs, but...I personally feel that there's something wrong about how VLD placed Keith in the lead. In a way, I can see him becoming Black Paladin, but Shiro...it feels more natural to me, it feels right that Shiro is Black Paladin. I'm not into VLD beyond Shiro, Keith's parents, and the Lions personally, but I know someone who loves it and makes good points about Keith as a leader, but something just isn't aligning for me. Maybe it's because Shiro and Keith are two radically different archetypes, and they got swapped when they shouldn't have, I don't know.

I came here because I saw one of your post S2 rewrites, and I appreciated it. So, again, feel free to answer me in DMs (if you have problems DM-ing me, let me know and I'll fix it for you) if you don't mind discussing this with me.

As a final note, I'm not trying to hate any particular character. They're all fine on their own, and I don't want to treat one as worse than the other. I just want to figure out this problem I'm having with Shiro and Keith.

Thank you for reading this, and take care.

You came to the right blog! Because I adore Keith and believe he certainly has qualities that could make him a good leader—and absolutely hate him as the Black Paladin.

The thing I never understood about Voltron fandom debates about who should be the Black Paladin is that they always seem based in the idea that because Shiro is a leader and the Black Paladin, that means the Black Paladin is the ONLY leader on the team.

It is worth noting that that premise was disproven in episode one. It was Allura who made the final call on whether the paladins should run or stay and fight Sendak, and Shiro explicitly bowed to her authority. From then on, Shiro and Allura both lead Team Voltron until the show decided to destroy their characters, accepting influence and trading responsibilities depending on which one of them fit the situation at hand. Typically, Allura functions more in a commander and diplomat role and Shiro is more of a field officer, but they both pick up the lead where needed.

I know you didn't bring up Allura, but I think it is vital she is included in any conversation about leadership in Voltron. She is introduced as THE princess of an entire planet, she has more knowledge and experience of the intergalactic landscape than any of the other characters, she's been set up to be a leader since birth, and she IS the leader of Team Voltron for two whole seasons. Shiro makes it VERY clear he considers her to outrank him.

So the question you have to ask any time you consider replacing Shiro as Black Paladin: why NOT Allura? If the Black Paladin is the "best leader", why are you skipping over the one character already established and thriving in a leadership role? (And then you have to ask yourself if that character being a Black woman has anything do with that.)

Now I do think there are ways narratively you could answer that question. For instance, if you keep the Lions as sentient beings, that means they can make choices—including wrong ones. For instance, for a time when I believed anything might be salvaged after season 3, my head canon for Black choosing Keith was that Keith was the one missing Shiro as intensely and desperately as Black in that moment. Therefore, the choice was not about Keith being "better" but rather them being at the same place emotionally and that allowing the bond. The major problem with the Lion swap in canon is that we're given NO reason for Keith to be Black Paladin besides "plot device said so". Especially when we have Allura right there. It's just bad writing.

(By the way, you don't have to be pro-Black Paladin Allura. There's nuance to be had, and I personally am actually more One True Black Paladin!Shiro. But you can't just dismiss her--a capable and proven leader--from the conversation. Erasing her character is not the answer.)

ANYWAY. Back to Keith. Or rather, leadership on Team Voltron. Thing is, there are many different WAYS to be a leader. We already touched on the differences between Allura and Shiro. Keith does a good job of making split second decisions in battle or calling shots if Shiro is incapacitated or somehow separated. If you're in the middle of a fight, the plan has gone to shit, and the team just got separated, Keith is great at telling people what to do and mobilizing because something needs to get done NOW.

But that's not the only way to lead. Keith, for instance, is terrible at pep talks. He misses a lot of the nuances going on between him and his teammates off the battlefield. He doesn't plan ahead, like, ever. Sure he's great at making up stuff on the fly, but sometimes you need a plan.

But it's not just Keith. For instance, when Shiro, Lance, and Pidge go on the mission to rescue Slav, it's Pidge who calls all the shots. Is that not leadership? Pidge is often the one telling people what they need to do to solve technical problems. She's a center for information, typically the one collecting it, organizing and interrupting it, and then instruction others based on her conclusions. We see her take point on a mission, give orders to her teammates, coordinate efforts, problem solve in real time and relay a new plan in order to navigate unexpected challenges. Why not argue PIDGE should be the leader?

And there's when they freed the Balmera and Hunk took the lead. That mission was more challenging, but I'd argue in that arc, Hunk's leadership mattered less in terms of orders and more in terms of determining what type of team they'd be. Hunk was ADAMANT they free the Balmerans and set a tone for the team where they didn't leave suffering people behind. Hunk set up a moral imperative for the team that they'd be lesser without.

And Lance! There's actually lots to say about Lance and his strengths and types of leadership. But it's easy to point out that Lance is the one initiating fun and team bonding outside of battle. And when you're operating a giant robot held together by emotion connection, that's pretty dang important!

Point is, they're ALL leaders. They all have the capability to take point when needed. We SEE them all take charge at different points of the show.

So what's the Black Paladin then? If Shiro's The Leader then what does that mean? And this is the cool part! Because you know what Shiro is really really good? Know who else to put in charge. He's the one who first acknowledges Allura as an authority because he sees she has knowledge and experience he and the others do not. He selects which paladins to go together on which missions based on their strengths and the situations. He steps back and lets Pidge or Lance or Hunk call the shots if they're in an area of their expertise. Shiro's job isn't to tell people what to do. It's to decide who to put in charge of what and place them in best position for success.

There's another aspect of Shiro's leadership that is supporting his teammates, offering comfort, teaching, and giving the kids something solid they can believe in so they don't have to care the full weight of the war. But like letting others take charge where they shine, Shiro's leadership is all about enabling those he leads. One of my favorite Shiro lines is "It's too dangerous—I'm coming with you." Shiro's goal is never control. He is support. He leads the paladins because he sees the best in them and helps them reach it.

Narratively, also, Shiro is just set up to be the Black Paladin. The parallels between himself and the Black Lion are too obvious. From both being controlled and abused by Zarkon to Shiro's missing arm and Black's mission bayard. It's a kid's show. The symbolism isn't all that subtle. And if that weren't enough, we literally get an entire episode A plot in Space Mall about it where Shiro literally fist fights Zarkon for the Black Lion and in the end, he wins because he makes it clear it's the Black Lion's choice and trust.

Remember when I said the problem with Keith in the Black Lion in canon is that we're never given an explanation beyond "because I said so"? We're shown repeatedly why the Black Lion chooses Shiro. Even before we meet most the Lions, the other paladins themselves choose Shiro as their leader when Lance asks him if they should go through the wormhole. We repeatedly see Shiro seek to understand the Black Lion better, and Black responding. We see the similarities between their situations and backstories. We see them bond.

And I think this is really important because when Shiro is in the Black Lion, it's not about him being "in charge." It's about his relationship with the Black Lion. Yeah, of course, the other paladins are leaders! And they should be! But none of them have Shiro's relationship with the Black Lion. In this narrative, the Black Lion isn't a prize to be won but a relationship to nurture, and Shiro has put in the work for that relationship.

Which is really important because it means the Lions aren't a hierarchy. The Black Paladin is one role, an important role in Voltron, but no more important than any of the others. "The Leader" is not the most important person in the room. Instead, Shiro is a facilitator who enables all the others to perform their roles better.

Also can I just remind everyone just how well the Red Lion fits Keith? The paladin who keeps throwing himself out airlocks get the Lion most likely to go AWOL and fly off to save him. Keith defends his friends and team by attacking first and asking questions later, and Red started destroying a planetary body to get to Keith. The kid with abandonment issues gets the Lion who doesn't hesitate a second to go after him. And even the way they're shown to bond—that it's so physical and based in action rather than words—it's so Keith. I freaking love Keith as the Red Paladin. He gets to be as chaotic and free as he was always meant to be and gets a Lion who meets him every step of the way.

But if you say, no, Keith should be the Black Paladin. Well. What about Red wasn't working? Why was that role not one Keith fit in? Because from my reading of canon, Keith was thriving in Red. He got a secure attachment to his favorite person in the world, he gets the freedom to fly while also being part of something bigger, and he's making friends. It's still in its beginning stages, but he's figuring out how to bond with Lance, Hunk, and Pidge and you get the sense these are a kind of friendships he's never experienced before. But you know what could kill that really fast? Making him The Leader, a position that inherently sets him apart from the rest.

This is actually a problem twice over for Keith because unlike Shiro, who is shown to be given his role voluntarily by everyone around him and repeatedly shows he's earned that trust and respect, Keith is basically thrown into the Plot Device Machine and gets a t-shirt that says YOU'RE THE LEADER NOW. And we never get a reason beyond that.

This is actually my biggest problem season 3 and the Lion Swap. Because as soon as they made that choice, the Lions became a hierarchy. But what other explanation do we have? Keith won Favorite Character status got "prompted" to Black Paladin. But as soon as Black Paladin is a promotion, that makes the other paladin roles inferior. Red becomes the "second in command". So Lance get prompted but can never be equal to Keith. Allura gets the "Training Wheels" Lion/Blue, and they didn't have to write that as a massive demotion, but they sure did anyway. Hunk and Pidge are no longer leaders because they aren't in the "Leader" Lions.

It makes me so mad. One of the things I loved first about Voltron was the message of equality and servant leadership. The idea that a leader (represented by Shiro) is someone who elevates and enables everyone else. A recognition for the more "feminine" types of leadership—nurturing, compassion, emotional support. Which support roles are seen as vital and just as if not more important than being the "boss."

But we only got two seasons of that before they pulled the rug out and said, "Nope. We're returning back to patriarchy." Suddenly the Lions were in a strict chain of command, one character was the boss and the rest were his subordinates. There was a top position and a bottom position, and the characters were all fighting over each other. Perhaps most damningly, the Lion lost all personality and agency and become trophies to symbolize a character's power. And I'm not saying they're an accidental representation of how women are treated in Western media but I MEAN. It's right there.

My response when anyone says "[X] character should be the Black Paladin!" is—Why? Is their connection with the Black Lion deeper than Shiro's? Do they have more in common with Black than Shiro does? What could they achieve or obtain as the Black Paladin that they couldn't where they currently are?

And, though I don't think most of us realize it, the answer to that last one is power. Because we're soaked in patriarchy and a certain portrayal of "leadership (derogatory)" that many fans automatically assumed the Black Paladin HAD to be in control of and have power over the other paladins. So of course you want your favorite character to be the Black Paladin! You don't want your self-insert to be inferior!

But that's all the patriarchy talking. The other paladins are NOT inferior. There is NOT a hierarchy of types of people. Keith doesn't have to have Shiro's role because he's already equal as Keith.

Keiths look different from Shiros, but they're all equal and valuable as they are. Same goes for Lances, Hunks, Pidges, and Alluras. The whole point is they're stronger together. Their differences make them BETTER.

So yeah. Of course, Keith has some good leadership qualities. There's plenty of situations where it only makes sense for him to take the lead. But why on earth does he need to be the Black Paladin to do that? He's already Keith!

[tj-crochets]

Crafting/vaccine side effects update: I am still not up for crafting but oh my gosh I feel so much better than I expected to! I did have a POTS flareup but my blood pressure never got below 100/60, so like it barely counts. I mean, the tachycardia was worse, but even that was nowhere near what it's been previous times I got the booster shots, and it's mostly resolved itself within like 24 hours of getting the shot instead of like three days. I'm still operating at a deficit of water and salt but I'm working on it bit by bit, and I was skeptical when my doc said I wouldn't need an extra dose of my salt-go-up pills* but he was right! Anyway point is no crafting updates today but there might actually be crafting updates tomorrow, which I did not expect to be saying *fludrocortisone! It helps me retain salt in a way almost approaching the normal human way of processing salt

[jessicas-pi]

it's actually, genuinely, honestly hilarious that in a fandom where popular ships include characters who are biologically related, characters with a 10+ year age gap who met when one was a teenager or even a child, and characters who have tried to kill each other, people hate on a friends-to-lovers ship with a <2 year age gap where the characters have a deep emotional bond and plenty of romantic subtext, because "they're siblings". my brother in the force they are literally not.

[alterousuggestion]

I'm very new to alterous attraction. It's very hard for me to really... Get a grasp on, honestly? If you could try to explain it would be very appreciated. I hear it spoken about like a truly wonderful thing, but I don't even know what it means besides "the secret third thing" and beyond the platonic/romantic/sexual/aesthetic model I used

hi screaming-cricket !! if i’m being honest, i don’t really know how to explain it either, ahaha. i know that’s not very helpful, but it truly is something that is in a gray zone for myself and a lot of other people (although not all). to me, alterous attraction is something that is very distinctly it’s own thing: it doesn’t feel like something i would typically associate with platonic friendships, but they do not feel inherently romantic either. in fact, calling them romantic or forcing them into the romantic category makes me so uncomfortable. there is overlap though, for example, whenever i experience alterous or platonic attraction, i feel these things in both cases:

wanting to talk/call/video call with them 

looking forward to hang outs

thinking about how we both consider each other a friend is something that makes me happy 

happy after seeing them, sad when they are upset, wanting to see them grow and achieve their dreams and be the best version of themselves 

but there are also noticeable differences:

the level of emotional intimacy i want to achieve with an alterous ‘crush’ is different compared to platonic friendships. i want to know them inside out, and i want them to know me inside out too. i want to be the first person they turn to for support, and i want them to be that for me too. 

calling them my ‘best friend’ is amazing, but it doesn’t seem to fully encompass all i feel for them. calling them my boyfriend/girlfriend/etc., also doesn’t feel accurate, and in a lot of ways, it feels limiting and really uncomfortable. like i do care for them platonically, but that doesn’t feel right, but romantic doesn’t feel right either. 

the level of physical intimacy is also different. i want to be close to them, i imagine taking naps with them. i want to hold their hand. maybe, if i knew they thought about me in the same way, i’d be open to kissing them too. warning for sexual themes in the indented bulletpoints:

when it comes to someone i am alterously attracted to, i am more comfortable with experimentation sexually. that does not mean i am sexually attracted to them (i am also ace), but it’s more like... they make me feel comfortable to try to do those things purely for enjoyment or to feel closer to someone, as long as it’s taken the same way by both parties. 

there is also a desire for a more involved future: i wish they would stay with me in a committed partnership, i want to share a living space with them in the way traditional romantic partners do. i want to share my life in general with them more intimately. 

think of it like... i walk alongside my friends and even though we take different paths, we still converge. for those i am alterously attracted to, i want to do life with them, but hand in hand. i want to go where they go (metaphorically). i want to take those steps with them. now that doesnt mean i want to abandon my own goals, or expect (or want) them to do that for me, but i want the path we take to be closer than others. 

i know that a lot of people might take a look at these things and go ‘i’m okay with doing that with people i am platonically attracted to’ or ‘this is what i want when i am romantically attracted to someone’ and that’s okay !!! relationships are not ‘one size fits all’. all relationships look different. for me, this is as close as i can explain what it feels/means to me. to me, it is something completely outside the platonic/sexual/aesthetic/etc models. alterous is it’s own thing. and it’s confusing to explain but it all boils down to those different feelings. and if you’re wondering whether or not you feel this, i think i would suggest taking a deep breath and maybe even a step back. make a list, if that helps, about what you’d do with a friend vs a romantic partner, and try to make the boundaries as clear as possible. and then think ‘ have i done things that are a mix of both with someone? did our relationship feel different in a way i couldn’t quite pin down? something that is there but also seems not there at the same time?’. if so, you might be dealing with alterous attraction. 

this reply is getting really long, but i guess what i mean to say that it if people are vague about what it feels like, it’s because it is a vague feeling. it’s unique. by listen to your mind and body: does it feel right calling something alterous? does it make you feel happy, and relieved? that’s how i started when i was questioning and then the boundaries and stuff like that became more clear to me after that :3

[illusionsofdreaming]

To this day I hope you post again 🙏

it's always tough receiving messages like these, since as a reader myself, I know the feeling of patiently waiting for a writer to post - be it meals or crumbs.

yet to be honest, I have no idea what to post anymore. I feel completely rusted in writing - I have the feeling of wanting to post but I can't seem to stop hating everything I write.

It's also been so long since I've read TCF, I'm not sure anything I write now will be relevant. My only comfort is that TCF's community has grown so much since I first started writing, nowadays you'll find plenty of better content out there haha

I, too, hope I post again in the future. I love reading and though I often go through an intense cycle of hatred for my own works, I always come back to writing.

So I do hope I do write and I wonder what I should write nowadays? Do people still read reader inserts?

More TCF?

New series...?

Anyways, I hope everyone who's still haunting this blog, a very, very nice weekend~