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good-chimes · 2 years

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In honor of Life series four, Life Series Bake Off AU

NEW SERIES LAUNCHES:

Nation charmed by fresh crop of 12 amateur bakers including intensely competitive student GRIAN, ambitious cake artists BDUBS and SCAR, scientific bread experts TANGO and IMPULSE, and ETHO who has no discernible social media presence and, rumor has it, doesn’t officially exist. Married couple JOEL and LIZZIE raise eyebrows—will they be able to compete against each other?—but this is settled when Lizzie immediately announces she would murder Joel in real life to win and has bought the kitchen knife set for it, and Joel lovingly declares he keeps an axe under his pillow in case this happens.

The judges as usual are renowned cake chef PEARL, bread expert MUMBO, and our two inimitable presenters: BIGB, beloved by the nation for his gentle reassurances of weeping contestants, and MARTYN whose main contribution is his trademark eyebrow waggles as we find out from the judges who’s in trouble this week.

TART WEEK (1)

Tart week gets off to a strong start, with contestant REN charming both the judges and Martyn with his exquisite tarte au citron and his total inability to let a double-entendre go to waste (‘I’m just a tart triumph all over’ he proclaims, to Martyn’s immediate delighted riposte ‘Mm, but what do you do on the weekends?’). Law student JIMMY is not so lucky when a misreading of the recipe leads to ten times the correct amount of butter and a catastrophic oven meltdown. Star baker goes to early favorite BDUBS for an exquisite three-tier tart showstopper.

Week one elimination is, of course, the hapless Jimmy, and the recaps are united on two fronts: it's always nice to see someone on the show who reminds you of your own midnight experiments, but holy shit Jimmy, did it not give you a clue when the melted butter started pouring out of the oven like you’d stabbed the spirit of margarine to death in there. Jimmy's butter meltdown becomes a meme and he sells T-shirts; Joel immediately posts a picture wearing one.

CAKE WEEK (2)

Week two brings cake week and an impressive performance from SCAR, who embarks on a showstopper Baked Alaska in the shape of a snow-covered mountain. Tranquil in the face of GRIAN’S constant disparaging comments about his whisking technique and browned meringue, Scar perseveres and is crowned star baker for the week, while Twitter immediately declares Grian the villain of the season. A contingent of viewers theorising ‘could this be flirting’ are swiftly shouted down on social media and retreat to a dedicated subthread on a cookery forum.

Last week’s star baker BDUBS seems distracted by his new-found friendships with the quiet ETHO, who spends hours on the surprisingly unambitious Victoria Sponge. A conspiracy theory emerges that Etho invented the Victoria Sponge, refuted by weak counterarguments like “cannot possibly be true” and “he would have to be several hundred years old.” Meanwhile the nation is won over by JOEL and LIZZIE’S chemistry as they trade quips and spatulas, unfortunately Joel is eliminated after a jam mishap, at which he declares “at least I went out after Jimmy.”

TEA-TIME WEEK (3)

Tea-time week brings florentines and shortbread, but it’s a sad week for love as REN is out after his overambitious scones fail to impress. “I’m heartbroken,” Martyn announces, and cannot be consoled even by Scott’s superb showstopper petite-fours. Ren was a good sport to the end, everyone agrees. Ren spotted at a Covent Garden coffee shop with Martyn three weeks later.

HALLOWEEN WEEK (4)

The mood is jovial for Halloween week, with judge MUMBO in fake vampire fangs while ETHO bakes cookies in the form of anatomically correct skulls. LIZZIE starts off with adorable witch-hat cupcakes in little witch hats, then spends the rest of the episode precisely and effortlessly crafting a blood red mirror glazed sachertorte which the presenters refuse to look at because it “makes them uncomfortable”, and is subsequently awarded star baker for the most genuine aura of threat ever achieved by a cake.

Meanwhile GRIAN and SCAR continue to genially snipe at each other throughout. TANGO asks BDUBS to turn his oven off at a crucial moment; unfortunately Bdubs forgets and then blames Tango for relying on him, leading to the charred mess of Tango’s showstopper and a social media uproar dubbed “OvenGate”. Bdubs alternately sorrowful and dramatically dismissive. This cruel betrayal knocks Tango out of the tent; a public petition is started for his reinstatement.

WEDDING WEEK (5)

Puppet theater designer CLEO has her star turn in wedding week with ranks of beautiful marzipan figurines on all her bakes. An intense rivalry develops between her and wedding-enthusiast BDUBS, who declares his magnificent fondant confection a dry run for his impending marriage to ETHO, a stranger he met ten days ago. When asked by presenters how much of this is a joke, Etho laughs and says “I guess?”, which leaves the nation none the wiser. Unfortunately IMPULSE’S canapes are considered uninspired and he is uninvited from both the wedding reception and the series.

BREAD WEEK (6)

The feared bread week comes around and all the artistic cake-makers wobble badly. SCAR and GRIAN just scrape through, but CLEO’S triumph last week turns to tragedy despite the trouble she has gone to to model a realistic centaur out of sourdough. Bdubs makes an impromptu speech to camera about how she was robbed but he intends to triumph in her honor.

MEDIEVAL WEEK (7)

The experimental medieval week takes the bakers on an outdoor camping trip where they will attempt to build their own stoves and use them to replicate historical bread techniques. BDUBS’S enthusiasm for this and his drive to impress ETHO turn out to be his downfall as, distracted, he builds a stove that bleeds heat and fails to brown his bread. Etho meanwhile excels at both the survival and breadmaking aspects, leading to a divide on Twitter on whether this level of competence is hot or just very concerning, potentially the cake equivalent of a serial killer. The Victoria Sponge theory is raised again. Etho alleviates some concerns by getting lost three times in an open field over the course of the episode, which loses him enough baking time that dark horse SCOTT pips him to the post of star baker.

WINTER WARMTH WEEK (8)

Week eight arrives and five bakers remain: LIZZIE and SCOTT are known to be good all-rounders, ETHO is the reigning technical expert, SCAR remains the favorite on the cakes side, and GRIAN is mainly known for his habit of constantly sneaking spoonfuls of Scar’s cake mix so he can mock the taste. Social media opinion is divided into “Grian is a good baker actually”, “Grian is only still in because of executive meddling”, and the small but determined contingent of “no guys we really think they’re flirting??” who have emerged from their cookery subthread unbowed and with compilations of video evidence.

The set gets cozy with winter warmth week. Brandy-based showstoppers are the order of the day, and LIZZIE wins the episode by crafting a biscuit unicorn with a mane you can set on fire. ETHO invents an intricate brandy plumbing system to shoot flaming alcohol above his plum pudding—this attempt is in fact a good deal too successful and instead sets MARTYN’S hair on fire. GRIAN comes to his aid but ends up adding more brandy. Judge PEARL extinguishes the flames with a bowl of cinnamon milk. The judges are clearly not feeling merciful when it comes to the scores and Etho’s run comes to a premature end.

DOUBLES WEEK (9)

Some old favorites return for doubles week, where each of the remaining four bakers is helped out by an eliminated contestant on the other end of the phone. GRIAN for once assesses the limits of his own talents and asks to pair up with ETHO, a plan that immediately pays off when the contestants are challenged with a tricky technical that sees them baking the perfect pumpernickel bread. SCAR, having asked to pair up with BDUBS, is quickly underwater as neither of them understand yeast.

Scar’s floundering proves too much for Grian, who belligerently passes along his pumpernickel tips from Etho, saving Scar’s technical enough for him to scrape through. When challenged by Martyn, Grian grudgingly admits, “I just want Scar to stay in, okay?” Some recaps clear him of his villain status; others are still convinced it’s a fluke.

Meanwhile SCOTT turns in an efficient technical with help from CLEO and also JIMMY, who is apparently sitting in Cleo’s living room just to heckle Scott. LIZZIE calls on husband JOEL, but a combination of overconfidence and flirting distracts them both, leading to a burnt crust and Lizzie’s elimination from the final four.

MERINGUE WEEK (Final Episode)

In the finale, SCOTT, SCAR, and GRIAN face off over a series of escalating meringue-based challenges. Whatever alliance sprung up between Grian and Scar in the last episode is clearly water under the bridge as the two of them obsessively steal each other’s ingredients and annoy each other into trivial mistakes. This escalates into a noisy quarrel over the main challenge of the week: an edible diorama of a cactus ring. Scar’s attempts to ‘aesthetically correct’ Grian’s mountain diorama leads to Grian melting his sugar-spun cacti with a crème brulée torch.

The two are no longer speaking by the showstopper, where Grian embarks on a desperate attempt to make up points with an ambitious trifle in a castle-shaped wall of macarons while Scar builds his own grand macaron diorama. The clock ticks down. Scott is creating an impeccable strawberry pavlova. The trifle is going badly. Grian is covered in sugar and regret. BigB pats him reassuringly on the shoulder.

At the last moment, Scar sacrifices half his perfect macarons to donate to Grian’s diorama. Grian, for once lost for words, grabs his apron and kisses him right in front of Martyn’s swiftly-derailed countdown. “Grian had a beautiful artistic vision,” Scar says sentimentally afterwards. “You have to respect the craft!” They snog behind the tasting table. Mumbo gamely attempts to award points. Pearl in a laughing fit behind the cameras. Martyn and BigB solemnly wrap up the shot with Martyn’s best cake-based innuendoes. Grian and Scar do not notice.

Scott wins the series. He got so many more points on the cactus ring technical.

#ethubs #treebark #scarian #zombiecleo #jimmy solidarity #i'm scared to use scott's tag he's on here #for blocking ->#traffic shipping

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lxmelle · 6 months

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"When the day turns into night

And you’re way beyond my sight,

I’ll think of you, I’ll think of you.

When the night turns into day

And you still are far away,

I’ll think of you, I’ll think of you.

Even when I am not here

We still can be so very near

I want you to know my dear

I’ll think of you."

Source: Facebook & misterrogers.org/videos/when-the-day-turns-into-night

And think of each other throughout their short lives they did.

Headcannon, analysis and theorising - more under the cut:

I’ll preface with how I’m aware there is some reaching and rambling, but there are so many interesting parallels and foreshadowing in Gege’s work that I’ll be at risk of writing my own “war and peace” with my theories and headcannon. I might be wrong as always, but I hope it makes for an interesting read even if you don’t agree! Comments and reblogs welcome!

I’ve pondered on this theme of lateness. I have another draft post on this topic, but in this scenario it illustrates the impact of riko’s death and their defeat (eventual victory for Gojo) to Toji.

One ascended and the other descended. Arguably one saved the other, and equally debatably, they exchanged paths. However else you wish to explain it, Gojo deferred to Geto who was his moral compass, and was guided back to a sensible path. Geto did not wish to be saved by the time Gojo intervened, but ultimately was saved from himself before he could get too twisted.

Or, was it ultimately still a tale where Gojo was indeed too late, and despite everything he had, he could do nothing?

Nevertheless, their first defeat left them both scarred and changed.

Losing each other was something they never got over - Gojo and Geto had wounds shaped like each other.

One went off to find strength to change the world; the other went off to foster students to change the world. They pursued each other’s forte to make up for the sense of loss from their separation - trying to find completion within themselves and their world around them, but falling short of healing their emotions wounds - until they could meet the other once again to resolve their relational rupture.

Look at these two paralleling each other... papa Geto and Gojo sensei.

Let me start with Geto:

In this world, Geto admitted before his death that he could never smile from the bottom of his heart.

No matter how many people loved him, how much they were willing to dedicate to him by following and trusting him, Geto didn’t feel happy. We see, so touchingly, how much he was loved by his family - Mimiko, Nanako, Miguel, Larue.

Did he ever feel loved? He certainly felt protective over them, but did he feel he mattered, besides being the one who gave them a vision?

It doesn’t seem so. Geto seemed to think little of himself, for someone prideful and egotistical (by his own definition). He lost a sense of security in himself and value following Gojo’s distancing of himself too. Untethered, he probably felt like he was free falling.

I theorise that his desire for a better world was born out of a desire for redemption, and it was a curse to avenge the loss of his youth as well as those who had died under his care - Riko, “Gojo” (pre-enlightenment), and Haibara. Geto had lost himself within a spiral of depression and self-affirmation following the Toji incident.

I sense that his search for meaning and purpose through the protection of others was always an act of self-sacrifice that was exhausting and defeating for him. Just like the consumption of curses. Like a futile attempt at regaining control when he was slowly losing it even more - getting further and further away from what he really needed - to heal from his emotional wounds.

What he needed to resolve was learning that he was loved within the world; that he had a place and belonging there. It didn’t have to be about him being a protector or making a difference. When he was feeling balanced from within (secure), existing in harmony could become possible. The rest could then fall into place.

But how could Geto have faith in the universe, after the system fails them all, his best friend now finds meaning in acting alone (being protective in his own way), he learns that riko’s death/sacrifice was inconsequential, and that his fellow peers would just keep dying if he continued powerlessly chugging on. He began to believe he can only rely on himself in a world separate from jujutsu high.

The only time he can remember feeling safe or having equilibrium was in his youth beside his best friend, Gojo. The primary source of his wound was losing Gojo and the disillusionment of their defeat was not repairable.

For Geto, despite chasing his goals to the best of his ability, he could not smile authentically for all these years. The world that was presented to him felt cruel; like a curse stuck on vengeance and justice, he kept burying himself with lies that he used to avoid facing the inevitable truth that this could only end in one way. It began and will end with Gojo.

He could not replace what Gojo was to him, and the strength he may have envied to fulfil his goal, was a constant reminder of what he had lost - the trust and understanding of someone. His vision of clarity had become costly and darkened as time passed. To gain more power meant he’d become increasingly twisted. Knowing he was on borrowed time, that what he was doing was wrong, that it could only end one way - to Gojo’s hand.

Did Geto, like Yorozu, need to be seen too? Was this the validation he found / sought - to be witnessed? I honestly don’t know, but whatever Gojo and Geto shared, it was more reciprocal than Sukuna and Yorozu. I do wish Geto was more honest with Gojo, but I think it was enough in itself to yield completely to Gojo and accept his end.

Geto had a Gojo-shaped wound that Gojo mercifully filled upon his last moments - showing him unconditional love and regard despite the changes between them.

We are kept out of the last words Gojo delivered, but we see that: He was recognised by the one who had truly mattered to him the most - the one whom he loved, and thought he had lost. He smiled sincerely at the very end.

Geto was shown to shed not one but two tears in Gojo’s afterlife scene. How moved must he have been to receive the regard and love from his best friend? Despite the lack of honest insight from Geto (Gege, you’re so stingy with inner narratives), it seems rather clear that there is something there that only Gojo can ease for him.

As for Gojo:

In his death dream / afterlife scene, Gojo was shown to express to Geto: If you were there, I probably would’ve been satisfied. It was received as loving, as Geto shed tears to this, and we know Gojo deflects from emotions by abruptly changing topics when he gets a bit heavy.

Gojo also describes how, no matter how many people adored him, he felt a distance between them; although he didn’t feel lonely, he could not feel understood in all these years as the strongest.

The line was drawn even more following his enlightenment, and his only memory of connection was with Geto, who had modelled a way for him to connect with those weaker than him and not see them like feeble dirt beneath his feet (as Hajime did) or pursue power like Sukuna did without caring about “worthless” love.

His main reason for being a teacher was also Geto. I headcannon/theorise that it wouldn’t have been the first time Gojo missed him, imagined “what would Geto do?” or saw Geto in his students in those 10+ years. What could he do differently?

Through the impact of Geto’s loss and the power of their love within their friendship, Gojo was compelled to think about others - whether he wished to prevent it from happening again, to reform the jujutsu world, to make room for Geto to potentially return (pre-jjk 0), or to simply understand his students... Gojo stretched himself to carry the emotional and mental load that was almost exclusively Geto’s role in their friendship.

Gojo was never the most nurturing type, but he did his very best - to advise, demonstrate, and protect the youth of these students. Giving them their own blue spring was also an ode to what he shared with Geto. Despite healing a lot and making room for others, Gojo had a Geto-shaped would that only Geto could fill.

What Gojo needed to resolve was to learn to love others - even moreso following his enlightenment in the manner in which he did after Toji - that he did not have to be isolated and alone, that true connection (love) exists and was worthwhile.

Meaning and purpose beyond “just getting kicks” out of being the strongest or wielding his skills beyond self-fulfilment - were all possible - but Gojo only had a limited canvas to work from - it was mostly Geto’s palette that he expanded upon. That he didn’t want to repeat whatever mistakes either of them made if possible.

His main forte was being a skilled sorcerer. This was his primary focus still, because this was just in his nature. Gojo was practically bestowed with the assets for this role. Nobody can blame him for being greedy and coveting more (love/connection he once knew) or attempting more (influencing a new generation). Gojo was meant to be human with all his flaws and thankfully, he kept his humanity.

He ultimately tried to reach and connect to Sukuna - a potential peer whom he could “converse” with, but they were too different. He fulfilled a need to showcase his skill and philosophy to his students - alongside his own personal desire to “go all out” and die gloriously-victorious through giving it his all.

He found the connection he needed right upon his death; meeting Geto and his friends without the need for an encounter at death’s door with Sukuna - unlike Jogo and Hajime who spent their last moments with Sukuna in a dialogue. Gojo didn’t need to talk with Sukuna. They could not understand each other; not when Sukuna did not know real love - even Yorozu did not think so.

To know love is to long for it enough to recognise it.

Since Gojo could not share with Sukuna what he wanted to teach (about love) he was able to tell and share it with the only person he knew who could understand - Geto. Even if Nanami and Haibara didn’t, Geto did.

It’s enough for them, isn’t it?

And it’s enough for us to know their legacy continues. It is so heartwarming to see Gojo’s students and members of Geto’s family being there too - all fighting for their own reasons - to defend and / or in honour of their memory.

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ivys-garden · 3 months

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Going away for a week. Before I go I'm gonna do some quick deduction of the Ore Snatcher case, going through the evidence for and against every hermit

Confirmed Innocent:

Cleo

Scar

Pearl (admitted it wasn't her on Reddit, thanks Jack)

● Ren - husbands don't do that to each other. Also this isn't the kinda prank Ren does. Through him and False were acting suspicious in Pearls new vid, perhaps the Neighbourhood is up to Something

● False - she was kinda sus in pearls vid, is kinda a prank she'd pull. Probably would only be involved if all the neighbourhood was involved

● Beef - has a motive through big wood, but his pranks are more in your face than this

● Skizz - see Beef

● Mumbo - not his style of prank (honestly he doesn't do much at all). wouldn't get involved unless someone started it first

● Grian - absolutely would not keep it a secret.

● Gem - isn't afraid of Doc and might want to prove it, but she wouldn't be this subtle about it. She also wouldn't keep it a secret, she'd tell everyone

● Wels - hasn't been playing much atm

● Etho - wouldn't commit to it this long

● Jevin - could be him. No evidence either way

● Xb - see jevin

● Xisuma - only involved if its the neighbourhood who's doing it together

● Stress - see Xisuma.

● Tango - see jevin.

● Impulse - see jevin.

● Bdubbs - could be trying to get a new case for court. But he'd never be this subtle about it, besides he'd be the one getting sued which ruins the point

●Keralis - see jevin

● Zedaph - is busy being silly

● Joel - would not keep it up this long. Would brag about it

● Hypno - see jevin

● Joe - see jevin

● Cub - most people say its him, he's got the redstone knowledge to bypass an alarm and is trying to frame Scar.

But: how does framing Scar help him if he's the Snatcher? It's drawing MORE attention to him and he doesn't have to be the Snatcher to frame Scar. And aside from his word the Snatcher has done nothing to frame Scar (the typo was never confirmed to be an attempt to frame sacrifice, only theorised. If it was a serious attempt there'd be way more and the messages would be spread over multiple signs)

You also don't need redstone knowledge to bypass docs alarm or to break the Ore blocks. Aside from this nothing points to it being Cub

● Iskall - this is absolutely his style of prank. We know he can keep pranks secret for a long time due to the prank war. We know he plans his pranks beforehand. He is confident enough to steal a block as Doc is working on the redstone. He has been undergoing “studies” of the hermits,this could be another he's doing. He COMITS to the hit hard, Joel's git the love letters to prove it.

So yeah, top subjects ATM

1)Multiple People (either as a group or as independent agents)

2)Iskall

3)The Neighbourhood, Collectively (Cleos statement would still be true because THEY wouldn't be the Ore Snatcher, the NEIGHBOURHOOD is the Ore snatcher)

Wildcard Pick: someone doing a mission possible. Perhaps even Doc himself testing his audience

#Hermitcraft #hermitcraft season x #hermitcraft season ten #hermitcraft season 10 #hermitcraft s10 #docm77 #the ore snatcher #the ore snatcher case #ace attorney: turnabout ore snatcher

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chaotic-tired-fox · 1 year

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Resident Evil obscure facts PART 3

Since y’all like these so much

(Probably the last part since I really scraped the bottom of my brain here)

Part 1 Part 2

☠️ Hunk telling Nighthawk to go and leave him during RE2 4th Survivor is the first time we see him respond with any emotion or concern for anyone else other than his mission.

☠️ Nikolai and Sergei Vladimir were friends and fought together in the soviet war.

☠️ Sergei Vladimir and Ozwell E Spencer were also old friends which is how Sergei came to rule over the UBCS in the first place. He was completely loyal to Spencer.

☠️ Chris bulking up between Code Veronica and RE5 was a direct response to Wesker being able to beat him so easily. He wanted to get stronger despite Wesker possessing superhuman strength.

☠️ Claire and Leon have a really shaky relationship thanks to Leon’s loyalty to the US Government. He doesn’t deviate from this until RE6 when he decides to defend Helena Harper and sympathises with her actions.

☠️ The knife Leon carries in the RE4 remake is the same knife Marvin gives him in the RE2 remake

☠️ Jake Muller said he was trained by an unnamed mercenary, some speculate this could have been Hunk as he became a mercenary after the Umbrella trials in 2003

☠️ The metal band Ice Nine Kills made a song based on the Resident Evil franchise called ‘Rainy Day’ (and its very good I recommend)

☠️ For Hunk to snap necks the way he does would require a hell of a lot of strength

☠️ Umbrella Corps (which is canon) set after Resident Evil 5 has voice lines from Wesker in it which implies he may be still alive.

Quote: “The circumstances of my death were greatly exaggerated.”

☠️ In Resident Evil 4 The Merchant’s eyes are blue but glow yellow in the dark/at night. In the Remake he doesn’t do this.

☠️ Luis Sera was Catholic which was the original religion of the village before Saddler moved in.

☠️ In Operation Raccoon City Nikolai has a scar on the side of his face but in the Resident Evil 3 Remake he doesn’t

☠️ Chris’s height was changed from 5’11” to 6’2” in later games

☠️ In Resident Evil 7, Ethan loses his left hand, in RE8 he loses his right.

☠️ ‘Master of Unlocking’ is perhaps the most well known ongoing Resident Evil reference not only in the series but many other games as well including most recently as an achievement in the game ‘Killer Frequency.’ You’ll find it most commonly as the name of trophies.

☠️ In Resident Evil 3 Remake RPD, Carlos makes a quote about cameras being used to kill monsters which is a reference to the Fatal Frame series.

☠️ Also in the RE3 Remake, we never truly find out who Nikolai’s client was and Jill never does the ‘detective work’ on it either. It’s theorised that it was Sergei Vladimir as he is the only person Nikolai had any kind of contact and relationship with.

☠️ There is an unofficial Resident Evil 4 inspired puzzle game on the Switch called Safe Room where you organise items into differently shaped grid boxes. Perfect for those that enjoy the satisfaction of good inventory management.

☠️ Crimson head zombies are a mutated variant of regular T-Virus zombies that can happen sometimes if you ‘kill’ them. But they are actually the midway point between a regular zombie and a Licker. (Note the sharp claws)

☠️ Rebecca’s coffee order is an iced caramel macchiato

☠️ Extra fact: I write Hunk related short stories on AO3! I’d love if you checked em out! The link to my fics is HERE

Death Island spoilers below!

☠️ In Death Island, Chris and Leon have matching watches

☠️ As of Death Island, all five of the main characters have been infected with something and cured.

☠️ Chris mentioning Piers in Death Island is the first we’ve heard of him since RE6 (and it hurtttt)

☠️ It’s implied that Chris finding Leon in Vendetta and bringing him back saved his life. We see his mood has greatly improved since then

☠️ We don’t actually have an answer for when Leon and Jill first met but it could have been around the same time he met Chris in 2010

☠️ Once again the trend of Leon crashing every vehicle he touches continues!

#resident evil #resident evil facts #chris redfield #leon s kennedy #jill valentine #claire redfield #rebecca chambers #resident evil hunk #piers nivans #resident evil operation raccoon city #nikolai ginovaef #sergei vladimir #albert wesker #resident evil death island #leon kennedy #ethan winters #resident evil 4 #jake muller

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sciderman · 9 months

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I’ve always found your version of Deadpool’s skin a perfect mix of uncomfortable and pleasant on the eyes. The comic’s version usually makes me uncomfortable but your’s makes me want to meet the guy and feel his skin- shit that’s weird. Uh what I’m saying is I’d much rather the way you draw DP’s skin over anything the comics have given us.

oh bless you anon!! he's just a cuddly guy...

i know a lot of spideypool artists like to lean into a more grotesque look for wade's scars - because, well - the comics kind of make him look like a zombie, a lot of the time.

i'm kind of not about it. i don't know - it's a personal thing, but i'm kind of squeamish – and so much art i've seen, i kind of grimace when i see the detailed flesh wounds. i don't know, it makes me enjoy the art a lot less.

i think if it's to serve a purpose - like, yeah, to show something horrific, let the art be horrific. but otherwise, if telling a little story where the characters are meant to be loveable, appeal is so important. i wouldn't want people to grimace looking at all those detailed flesh wounds. i want people to look at wade and see that he's cuddly and loveable. sure, his face is all messed up and scarred, but he's still got his cuddly humanity. you can still hug him. and you should hug him. he won't stab you (he doesn't do that anymore.)

it's why i really don't like the dead white eyes that the comics have been pushing since 2013 – i hate those dead eyes. he never had dead eyes before that. i know people theorise oh, it's because his eyes are white through the mask but that's stupid. that's stupid. by that logic peter parker should actually have huge bug eyes. shut up. it's a mask. it is a mask with white lenses.

bring back my wonderful, loveable, cuddly brown-eyed boy. he's weird-looking but he's not vomit-inducing.

#sci speaks #why did they do that to him.. why.#disagree wholeheartedly about wade's horrible zombie makeover #if you get rid of his eyes you're getting rid of his humanity...

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deadgirlwalking91 · 5 months

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new update - 'thank you for the venom', chapter 4: 'sugar, we're goin' down swinging'

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter 4 Summary

After a hard day, all Lute wants to do is relax in the bath. Alone.

Adam, however, has other plans.

Author's note:

I have a super cool announcement to make - I now have a beta reader! And not just any old beta - she is none other than the most incredible, incomprehensibly talented @branded-rose! She deserves the utmost thanks for being my sounding board, fellow head-canon theoriser, hype gal and all-round legend. Also, if you aren't familiar with her work, close this tab right now and go check her art and accompanying mini-fics out!

I have had the MOST fun writing this chapter. The concept for it has undergone a few transformations in my mind, and I'm glad it's ended up where it has. I hope you all enjoy reading it!

As always, thank you for the comments, likes, reblogs, inboxes and for reading this silly little story <3

***

Lute’s Apartment, Exorcist Training Centre, Heaven

Lute hated being injured.

It wasn’t necessarily the feeling of being in pain that she couldn’t stand. On the contrary, she welcomed the tenderness of every bruise, the sting of every laceration – hell, the dull, aching throb of every broken bone that had been inflicted upon her over her years as an Exorcist. Pain meant she had no hesitations in putting her body on the line; she was renowned, after all, for her reputation as an unrelenting, unstoppable, balls-to-the-wall killing machine.

Her body was heavily adorned with the scars as proof of her status; hundreds of faded gold marks of varying sizes were flecked upon her otherwise pale skin. Each healed wound beheld a gory reminder of her battles and triumphs.

No, what irked Lute was the unwanted attention that she attracted whenever she sustained an injury. Thankfully, due to her recent refocus on physical conditioning, there were no weapons being handled and therefore, there should have been minimal opportunity for anybody to come into harm’s way under her guidance.

There was just one variable that Lute hadn’t accounted for: her dickhead boss.

What the fuck had Adam been thinking, tackling her so suddenly during that afternoon’s training session? One minute, she’d been pointing out common weak spots to hit on a Sinner’s body to expose their vulnerabilities, and then the next she’d unexpectedly been crushed by him. Her right hip and lower back had taken the brunt of the fall as he’d grabbed her around the torso, pinned her arms against her body and drove her into the floor with a force so great she’d been winded before she hit the deck.

Then, her sisters had shrieked, screamed – there may have even been one who cried, there usually was when someone hurt themselves – and crowded around her as she lay on the hardwood floor, dazed, confused and completely smothered by Adam’s considerably larger frame.

“Get off her, Sir, she’s not breathing!”

“I-is…is she dead?”

“Lieutenant, are you alright?!”

“Are you fucking kidding me, Commander?! What the fuck was that?!” Thank God for Vaggie, who had elbowed her way to the front of the gaggling group and stood, hands on hips, glaring at the angel who lay atop her friend.

“Out of line, Vagina,” he had drawled lazily, finally pulling himself up to a standing position. “You owe me burpees for that.”

“I don’t owe you a thing after the bullshit you just pulled,” she’d snapped back, helping Lute stand to her feet. “Ladies, back up, she’s coming through.”

“Thanks,” Lute had managed to grunt, shuffling away from the crowd as quickly as she could so they couldn’t see the golden flush of humiliation that had started to warm her cheeks. There was only one thing that she hated more than being injured, and that was being embarrassed.

Luckily, the colour of her face had returned to normal by the time she’d knocked on Sera’s door to report that training had been cancelled for the rest of the day. She’d even come up with the perfect excuse: the Exorcists had made such remarkable progress with their strength training she was giving them the rest of the afternoon off as a reward while she made some adjustments to their schedule.

Too bad her hip and lower back had started burning by that point – not to mention the feathers of her wings were incredibly ruffled, a dead giveaway that she’d been involved in some kind of mishap. Sera, astute as ever, noticed her limp and disgruntled appearance and had demanded to know what had happened. And it wasn’t like Lute could lie to the Head Seraphim.

At least, not off the cuff.

And so, she found herself fumbling for her key outside her apartment door, ordered to rest up for the evening lest her injuries worsened.

Oh, she was going to rest up, alright. Today’s events called for a bath so damn hot her skin would burn brighter than the surface of the sun, a glass of wine in one hand and steamy novel in another. She’d slip beneath the bubbles of her bath and into the pages of her book, with zero plans to re-enter reality for at least three – no, maybe four hours.

At last, she felt her apartment key in bottom of her bag. Sighing in relief as she entered her immaculate personal sanctuary, she softly pushed the front door back towards its frame without looking, kicking her trainers off as soon she was fully inside. Hanging her bag onto a hook in her entryway, she made a beeline for her small kitchen – specifically, for a bottle of red wine she knew she’d had stashed away at the bottom of her pantry for emergencies and unexpected visits from Vaggie.

After the day she’d had, this was absolutely classified as an emergency.

Ignoring the burn that seemed to now consume most of her lower body, Lute located a wine glass and unscrewed the lid of the bottle, pausing to take a long swig directly from it before filling her glass.

Classy.

Sipping her drink from its intended vessel, she plucked a candle off her coffee table and wandered into her bathroom to start preparing for her date with her bathtub.

As Lute sat her glass and candle onto the counter, she caught her reflection in the mirror. God, she looked like she’d had a day – though, to be fair, she’d had the absolute wind knocked out of her only a few hours earlier. Her platinum hair, half of which had been twisted into a small knot on top of her head, had loose strands starting to fall around her face. The bun was askew, leaning more towards the right and threatening to unravel any minute. If her little altercation hadn’t been so public, it wouldn’t be so farfetched for one to imagine she’d been sandwiched between her boss and the floor for a different reason.

Snorting in disgust to herself at the mental image she’d painted, she released her topknot and leant down to turn on the bath mixer, nudging the lever closer to the right until the water temperature was practically scalding. Perfection. She plugged the bath and turned her attention to the unlit candle.

She’d forgotten the lighter. Dammit. She walked gingerly back out into her living area, peeling her crop top up and off over her head, letting it fall to the floor somewhere near the bench of her kitchen, her socks following. Usually, she’d never allow herself to leave stray items of clothing around her apartment, but she was so hyper focused on getting into her bath she was willing to break her own rules - just this once. Besides, she’d tidy up before bedtime anyhow.

After she grabbed the lighter from an overhead cabinet that was just out of reach, requiring a little assistance from her wings, she set back to the bathroom to light her candle. The calming combination of rose geranium, bergamot and patchouli filled her bathroom almost instantaneously; the smell reminded her of the one and only time she’d allowed Vaggie to drag her to a day spa for a massage and to get her wings preened.

It was a one-time event because, as it turned out, strangers touching her body made her skin crawl and she couldn’t bring herself to relax, even if the aim was to help relieve years of built-up tension, stress and physical exertion. Getting her wings preened was even worse; the therapist kept running her fingers through all her sensitive spots, which made Lute squirm uncomfortably throughout the entire session. Neither experience was what she would call enjoyable.

The only good thing to come out of that disaster was the candle she’d purchased to reassure Vaggie the day hadn’t totally sucked.

She took another sip of wine and looked back in the mirror, turning to see if she could see any obvious signs of bruising on her body. She pulled the waistband of her leggings down for a better look – ah, there it was, a familiar dark orange patch beginning to bloom directly over her right hip. She leant forward to inspect it further – that was going to be ugly tomorrow – and a repetitive, robotic tune sung from her pocket, breaking her concentration. Probably Vaggie checking in on her, bless her.

Lute dug her hand into her pocket and retrieved her phone, frowning as she checked the caller ID.

Commander Adam.

“Absolutely not.” She hit the red decline button and padded out to her lounge, where she turned her phone off and tossed it onto her couch. Bath time had a strict no-phone policy, and Adam had already ruined enough of her day – she didn’t need him encroaching on her night, too. She shimmied her leggings down her lower half, resting against the arm of her couch to support her body as she bent over and tugged the end of them off her feet.

Clad only in her underwear now – a practical, black, seam-free thong ideal for wearing under workout clothes – Lute headed into her bedroom, where she grabbed the book she was currently reading from her nightstand, closing the door as she turned towards the bathroom. Pausing in the hall to rid herself of her last item of clothing, entered the bathroom, fully naked, shutting the door firmly behind her.

The bath was now full and inviting, bubbles threatening to spill over the edge and onto the white tiled floor, steam visibly rising from its depths and dissipating somewhere just short of the ceiling. Grinning in anticipation, Lute shut the mixer off and turned off the light switch, the flickering flame of the candle providing the only source of light – just enough for her to be able to read. Grabbing her book, she stepped into the hot water, allowing the heat to envelop her completely as she slid down into its warmth, tucking her wings comfortably against her sides.

Sighing contentedly to herself, she opened her paperback up to where she’d dog-eared her page and allowed herself to be fully consumed by the words between the well-loved cover, banishing any thoughts, any feelings, any pain that had arisen from her day out of her mind.

What she was blissfully unaware of was that she hadn’t closed her front door properly.

Or that she’d missed two calls, a voicemail and a text message from her boss.

And that he was on a frantic mission to try and find her.

Right now.

Adam and Lute’s Office, Exorcist Training Centre, Heaven

“You’ve reached Lute. Leave me a message if it’s important.”

“What is the point of having a damn lieutenant,” Adam growled to himself furiously, “if she doesn’t answer her fucking phone when I need her to!” Huffing impatiently, he threw his phone onto his cluttered desk, knocking a ball made entirely of rubber bands onto the floor. Women were always on their phones, why was this one any different?

Because her sole purpose in life is to make everything difficult.

He glowered in the direction of Lute’s spotless desk. This was all her fault. If she hadn’t of approached Sera with her shitty statistics and stupid proposal, he wouldn’t be facing the prospect of a pointless life in less than a year’s time. Sera would have just let Extermination Day continue as it was, and things would stay the same. Stay normal.

And now, he had to figure out a way to coexist peacefully with the she-devil. Pretend to support her ideas. Not lump his paperwork on her. Make small talk with her.

Fuck his life.

“Ribs or wings?” He asked the empty chair. He figured he may as well sound out some practice questions in preparation. “Actually neither, you’d be the type to survive on gross shit like protein shakes and probably don’t know what real food tastes like. Alright…” he cleared his throat. “Uh, what was the last movie that made you laugh? Nah, that one’s dumb, I don’t think you’ve been programmed to laugh or understand humour.” He groaned. “Last one, because I’m starting to feel like a dickhead. Most fuckable member of a band…go!”

Silence.

Adam narrowed his eyes.

“Yeah, you would pick the drummer,” he grumbled, standing up. He reached for his phone and tried calling Lute again. Bitch better pick up, or he’d search every nook and cranny of this complex for her. And once he found her, she’d have hell to pay. Screw the idea of a truce, she was pissing him off now.

“You’ve reached Lute. Leave me a message if it’s important.”

Beep.

“Fucks sake, Lieutenant, pick up your phone!” He hissed. Instead of locking the phone after hanging up, he hit the message icon instead and tapped out a quick text, tongue between his teeth as he concentrated.

Adam: Lt. Call me. That’s an order!!!

He shoved the phone into his pocket and sighed, puffing his cheeks out. Dammit, he really had no other choice but to find her.

If I were her, where would I spend my spare time? No – it could take hours trying to find her. I need a workaround. Someone who would know where she lives.

Adam grinned maniacally, inspiration suddenly kicking in.

“I’m a ge-ni-us,” he sang to himself, taking his phone out once more and tapping on a contact.

“Hello, Adam. Have you calmed down?”

“Me? Pfft. Don’t worry about me Sera, I’m so fine. I’m calling because I really want to apologise to Lute, but she’s not answering her phone. Do you have her apartment number so I can drop by to check on her?” He balled his hand into a fist near his crotch and made an obscene gesture. Check on her, his ass.

Silence.

“Adam.”

“Sera.”

“If I do this in good faith,” her voice was dangerously cool on the other end of the phone, “and I find out that you’ve misused the information I’ve given you, there will be consequences. Understood?”

“Crystal, boss.”

“Her apartment number is 583. I mean it Adam, one more incident from you and I-”

“SweetkaythanksSeraloveyoubossbye!” He quickly hung up the phone before Sera could finish her sentence. He’d deal with the inevitable lecture he’d get for hanging up on her later.

He had a lieutenant to hunt down.

Apartment Block, Exorcist Training Centre, Heaven

It wasn’t often that Adam found himself in a situation that required him to make a mental pros and cons list.

However, Lute had left him in quite the predicament: her apartment door was slightly ajar. Which meant he was likely to find her in there: big pro.

He was also likely to find her in a more hostile state than usual, given the events that had transpired earlier that day: big con.

But, if he went in, he’d be able to propose a truce, which would help ensure the success of the next Extermination: bigger pro.

Also, he could twist his pitch to emphasise that it would make her job easier: another big pro.

Fuck it, that was all the evidence he needed. He was getting impatient. He nudged the door open, expecting a response from inside. Nothing.

“Lieutenant?” Adam called, pushing the door open further and poking his head inside. “You home?”

No answer.

He frowned as he fully entered the apartment, observing the immaculate home in front of him. His colleague lived a truly minimalistic lifestyle – he found it borderline depressing, really. A small TV, two-seater couch and coffee table were all that occupied her living room. No decorative clutter. No prints on the walls. No photos of friends. Clothes on the floor.

He did a double take. Clothes on the floor?!

That… he hadn’t been expecting. Then again, he didn’t take Lute as the type to leave her front door unlocked and open when she was nowhere to be seen.

He strode forward, trying to get his bearings around her apartment based on the trail of her clothes. Crop and socks by the kitchen counter to his left. He walked past the discarded pants next to the couch on his right. A dead end with two closed doors and…something scrunched up on the floor? He bent to take a closer look and bolted upright once he realised what it was.

Her underwear.

Dismayed, he blinked repeatedly at the offending item of clothing on the floor in front of him. This surely had to be some kind of fucked-up fever dream. Because if somebody had told him that during his search for his second-in-command that he’d find himself staring down at her underwear on the floor, he would have thrown them down into the pits of Hell himself.

“Sera must have put some kind of curse on me with her four hundred weird eyes,” he muttered. “This is too messed up to be real.” He took a wide berth, desperate to avoid the offending undergarment, and found himself directly in front of one door, with another to his left. Both were closed.

He tentatively opened the door in front of him, hoping to catch her in bed, asleep. Where else could she possibly be? He knew he’d likely pay for it – she wasn’t likely to enjoy being woken up, least of all by him – but it’d be worth it just to see the sheer panic that would likely cross her face for a brief second before she went off the rails.

However, nothing could have prepared Adam for what was behind that door.

Because, he’d found his lieutenant, alright. In the bathtub, her body illuminated only by candlelight.

Naked.

Adam looked down at her, his eyes widening in horror. Oh no. No, no, no. This wasn’t happening. This was meant to be her bedroom, she was supposed to be asleep and she definitely wasn’t supposed to be fucking NAKED.

He’d opened the wrong fucking door.

“SHIT!”

He clapped his hand over the mouth of his mask, accidentally banging the door completely open in the process, revealing his presence to the wide-eyed angel laying in front of him.

The same wide-eyed angel who, renowned for her reputation as a bloodthirsty killer, had a murderous look in her eyes that he’d never seen before, despite many an excursion down to Hell.

Shit. I’m SO dead.

Lute’s Bathroom, Apartment Block, Exorcist Training Centre, Heaven

“I am going to KILL you!”

The water in her bath had long gone lukewarm, but white-hot heat radiated throughout Lute’s body, starting from her cheeks and spreading rapidly all the way down to her toes. Still seated, she instinctively flung her book to the other side of the room. She desperately grabbed in the direction of her towel with one hand, her other arm pressed tightly against her breasts in a feeble attempt to cover as much skin as possible. She just needed to get this towel around her, sprint to the kitchen, grab the butcher’s knife and-

“Shit!” Adam yelped, turning away from his lieutenant, drawing his golden wings around his middle to protect himself. He hastily began retreating into her lounge, eyes fixed on the front door. At lighting speed, Lute seized her opportunity to stand – an awful squelch filling the room as water sloshed out of the bath onto the floor - and retrieve her towel, hastily wrapping it around her body with one hand, not bothering to dry herself before hurling herself out of the tub towards her superior.

Her wings were weighed down with half of the water from her bath, soaking through her white towel completely so it clung to her like a skin-tight dress. As she ran, enormous puddles of water pooled in her wake, but she didn’t care. Water could be cleaned up anytime.

She had mere moments, however, to violently murder her boss.

With an almighty cry, she launched herself at Adam’s back, still clutching the towel at the top her sternum. Her knee caught him in his lower back, causing him to stumble and trip, face-down onto the carpet of her living room.

“How-” she growled, straddling his upper back with her thighs, knees poking into his armpit, leaning forward so that her free arm curled around the front of his neck, “- the fuck did you get into my house, you disgusting piece of shit?”

“Maybe,” Adam rasped, using both of his hands to pull Lute’s arm away from his windpipe, “you should learn to lock your door, Lieutenant. You left it wide open for all of Heaven to come in and enjoy the show!”

“And you didn’t think it polite to knock?!” she roared. “Or, I don’t know, try calling me first?! What could you possibly want so fucking badly,” she grunted the last word as she squeezed her thighs against his back, bracing herself so she could fend off his hands, which were gradually freeing her elbow from his throat, “that you needed to walk in on me in the fucking bath?! How long were you standing there, perv?!”

Adam groaned in discomfort as her knees dug into his underarms. Lute squeezed harder again as she moved her mouth closer to the side of his head to get close to his ear.

“I am giving you three seconds,” she snarled, ignoring her towel slipping down her chest as she channelled all her energy into closing the gap between her elbow and his neck, “to explain yourself before I choke you to death. I don’t care if Sera casts me down into hell; a life of damnation would be worth it if it meant I got to be the one to end yo-”

Adam’s right hand let go of Lute’s forearm and he braced it on the floor so he could jerk his right shoulder up and over to his left violently, causing Lute to teeter off-balance and fall sideways onto her already bruised hip. She yelped in pain, motionless for a moment and Adam, now free, took advantage of her breather to straddle her thighs, pinning them together with his own. His knees were quickly becoming soaked as he pressed into the wet towel that still clung to her lower body, but he didn’t care. She howled in rage and made to claw at his mask with her free hand before he caught her wrist and held it to the floor above her head, his face only inches above hers. With his other hand, he swiftly untangled Lute’s fist from her towel and brought it up next to her other hand, pinning her down completely.

“Listen here, girlie,” he seethed as she thrashed her legs violently behind him, attempting to use her hips to throw him off. “I didn’t fucking come here to do anything untoward, alright? I needed to talk to you urgently and you weren’t answering your phone. Your door was wide open. What else was I supposed to do?”

“You didn’t notice the trail of clothes on the floor and think I might be otherwise occupied?”

“Oh please, I’ve seen enough thongs to last me an afterlife. Your underwear on the floor wasn’t going to stop me from finding you. Besides, I’d assumed you were in bed, asleep. Hold still you crazy bitch, I need to talk to you.”

“There is nothing you could need to tell me that necessitates coming into my home uninvited - argh.” She arched her back to try and twist herself free, her towel now dangerously close to being rendered completely useless. Frustrated, wet and spent, she let her head drop back against the carpet, her chest heaving with exhaustion. Adam’s eyes flickered downwards, and he grinned devilishly.

“Didn’t realise you gave up so easily, Dangertits.”

“What the fuck did you just call me?!” she hissed. Her cheeks flushed brilliantly as she looked down and realised that he’d snuck a quick look at her cleavage, which was beginning to spill over the top of her towel.

“You heard me, babe. I think that’s what I’ll refer to you as from now on. It really…” he let his gaze trail down to her chest again, before deliberately taking his time to being his eyes back up to hers again, knowing that he was antagonising her now. A wicked gleam etched across his mask. “…suits you. Ready to wave the white flag and hear me out?”

“I’d rather fucking die.”

“Not an option, Lieutenant. Shut up and stop running that filthy mouth of yours for a sec and listen to me. That’s an order.”

Lute glowered at him.

“Let me go.”

Adam snickered. “Not a chance.”

“Now.”

“Nuh-uh.”

“I’ll tell Sera.”

“Tattling again, Lieutenant? That would be twice today. I’ll give you a hot tip, because I’m feeling generous.” He bent his head low against her ear, his forehead pressing against her hair as he whispered into her ear. “I strongly advise you against it. Wouldn’t want the boss thinking you can’t hold your own now, would you?”

Lute shuddered at his closeness – or was the adrenaline starting to wear off and a chill settling in because of the wet towel? It didn’t matter, anyway. He was right. She couldn’t go to Sera again with something like this. It would make her appear weak. Incapable. Not to mention that the whole situation was utterly humiliating, and there was no way she was telling a single soul about what had happened tonight. Not even Vaggie.

“What do you want, then?”

Adam lifted his head back up, so their faces were parallel once more and scoffed.

“Are you kidding me, babe? We’re not having this conversation right now! In case you haven’t noticed, you’re soaking wet – not in a good way, either – and basically naked. We can talk tomorrow morning.”

“Y-you,” Lute gasped, shutting her eyes in disbelief. After all this, he wasn’t even going to tell her. Oh, how she wanted nothing more than to tear him apart, limb by limb. “You asshole. You evil, conniving sonnuva-”

“Nine o’clock. Our office.” Adam released his grip on her wrist and rose to a standing position. He held out his hand to help her up, but Lute swatted it away angrily. He could shove it up his ass, as far she was concerned.

“Don’t be late.” He straightened his robes and headed towards her front door, whistling merrily to himself. Lute pulled herself into a sitting position, readjusting her towel so she was adequately covered once more. She said a silent prayer of thanks that the wetness of the towel meant that it stuck tight to her lower body, ensuring some level of modesty for her during their scrap. She desperately wanted to scream at him, throw something at his head, charge at him again and make him pay for the humiliation she’d just suffered.

But she didn’t. Because, despite wanting to exact her revenge immediately with every fibre of her being, she was overwhelmingly exhausted. At this point, all she had the energy to do was crawl into bed and forget that she’d even woken up this morning.

Adam grinned as he opened the door.

“At ease, Dangertits.” He saluted her mockingly before exiting.

He managed to close the door just in time to hear the TV remote hit the back of the door and clang to the floor.

***

Next time: Lute's suspicious that Adam's trying to poison her.

#hazbin hotel #adam x lute #guardrock #guitarspear #guitarspear fic #hazbin adam #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lute #hazbin hotel fanfic #hazbin lute

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Ari AU - Part Two

This is Part Two of my popstar Grian AU! Part One is is here! Part Three is here! Part Four is here! Part Five is here!

CONTENT WARNINGS for this Part: discussions of past attempted SA, physical assault, hospitals, briefly mentioned drug abuse, suicidal ideation, mental health crisis.

please consider reblogging if you liked this and want others to see it :D feel free to send me asks, comments, etc. about the au!

Martyn’s Radio Show

The response from Grian’s fans is overwhelmingly positive. While some are disappointed that the last shows were cancelled, most are just happy to see Grian okay and alive, even if she looks worse for wear. Online, the fanbase supports Grian’s claims. Online, they feel empowered to share their own experiences. Online, they believe her.

The tabloids continue with the addict line. They claim Grian is unstable and manic. They claim he’s lying about the night out. Pearl suggests Grian go on the radio. Talk more about her experiences, because it really is helping people, and if she makes a professional, live appearance on air, the accusations of her being on drugs will seem less credible.

Grian agrees, so Mumbo and Pearl get him booked in with Martyn, of Faction Isles Radio [a pirates smp reference? In my angst fic?] for a live interview and casual discussion about Grian’s life and career.

For someone used to live performances, Grian is absolutely terrified. What if he says the wrong thing? What if she messes up her story and people think it’s fake? What if this Martyn guy is mean, or unfair, or things are awkward?

This is where Impulse steps in. He offers Grian a spot on his hobby podcast with his friend, Skizz. A pre-recorded semi-interview with people Grian is more comfortable with, in preparation for the “real thing”. Grian accepts, and they record the episode together. She tries not to freak out every time she stumbles over her words and Impulse says they can cut it.

(Eventually she snaps that they can’t cut anything when it’s live, so why are they acting like her mistakes are okay? Impulse takes it graciously, helping her calm down. Skizz offers a few words of advice that Grian doesn’t even remember. Something about going for it, even if she’s scared? After the pep talk, she does feel better. More confident...)

Then suddenly, it is time for the “real thing”. To his credit, Martyn is lovely. A natural on-air, well-researched about Grian’s career, asking all the right questions and never seeming judgemental. Grian recounts her rise to fame, her love of music, and then, finally, the tour.

They get to a rather emotional point and Grian thinks he might be about to cry. How embarrassing would that be? But Martyn seems to understand, and there's a break for one of Grian’s songs. Turning off his mic to let the music play, Martyn looks over to Grian with a laid-back but kind smile, and asks if she's okay.

Grian is not okay, but if she admits that, they’ll never get through the interview, so she lies. Martyn gives him a look like he knows he’s lying, but it isn’t judgemental.

The show is a success. Grian feels a little lighter.

Downtime

The radio show does not help with the tabloid problem. As the media does, they try to get more out of Grian’s story, spinning it into either support or negativity. Theorising that she lied about why she was in the hospital- wild stories ranging from drug use to secret pregnancy (she is not about to explain why that's impossible).

With news trucks and paparazzi hanging around outside her house, she has to keep the curtains closed constantly. Every time she steps outside she's hounded again. On the one hand it's good that he's being kept in the public eye, but he wants his privacy more than anything in the world.

So, Scar offers to open his house to her. Grian accepts, moving in with him in secret. They manage a few blissful weeks with each other before the press finds them again. It’s awful. They're still trying to explore their relationship and what it means, trying to figure it all out. Grian's still trying to come to terms with what happened to him and how Scar saved him.

The flashing of cameras is starting to give Grian anxiety. More than usual. She has half a mind to make another statement, but knows that'll only make things worse. In the meantime, Grian officially moves in with Scar.

Even Grian’s self-expression is criticised to no end. Suddenly the press is snapping pictures of her, in Scar's home, in jeans and sweaters and no makeup. She cuts her hair short because it’s starting to make her itch with discomfort, and boy does that cause an outcry about her 'mental breakdown'. Grian never had many issues with dysphoria or dysmorphia before, but once the papers picking apart her image start flooding in, looking in the mirror makes her a little nauseous.

Of course, the real fans still support her. She has a good, loyal fanbase who do care about her wellbeing and understand why she's hiding away. But the tabloids can build a story out of anything. Kind stories just don’t sell.

Album Two: ‘Land of the Viscera’

Things calm down a little bit, enough for Grian to master a new album. This time it comes from a place of anger and frustration, at the media and the stalkers and herself. She spends a lot of time working on the tone of the album, not wanting to fully alienate her fans but not wanting to stick with the preppy pop of her biggest successes.

In the end she goes for a mixture of femininity and something grungier, less pretty, less polished, a little more unhinged and rock-inspired. Think female punk bands, mixed with the warbling parasitic sound of bjork. The album is titled Land of the Viscera and follows the story of a character named Mother Spore as she explores a wonderland of twisted nature and decaying landscapes.

The aesthetic goes hard, basically. It feels blurry in terms of genre and more obviously queer, the Mother Spore metaphor openly criticising the tabloid news cycle and addressing the struggles Grian has faced in hand with fame. Still, her music holds a range of appeal, keeping within a pop-type structure while shifting into gothic, punk and rock.

The music videos are dark and edgy, full of rot, blood, and decay. They reference the stalking and attempted assault. Grian keeps her feminine costumes, trading the sleek red dresses for dark grey layered gowns. More severe makeup remains stylish, but drifts further away from Grian’s real preferences, as if he’s trying to separate himself from his persona.

The fans call it an ‘era’, immediately scrambling to figure out the “lore” hidden within the videos and lyrics. While critics suggest Grian will lose some of her audience by adopting a harsher sound, the album is regarded as an overall success.

Taking One For The Team

It takes a while for Grian to feel comfortable going ‘out’ into the world again. After the release of the album, the paparazzi take a moment to calm down, and public appearances seem less scary than before.

That is, until he starts making public appearances again, and remembers why he tried to go into hiding. Grian starts flipping off cameras or walking straight through the reporters, whenever she goes anywhere. Scar, ever one to do his job, isn’t sure he likes the attention, especially as the tabloids start to shift their reporting back to him. At least it fits Grian’s new image to be snarky and mean towards the cameras, bringing some of her private defence mechanisms from the tour back into the foreground.

New threats start coming in. It was fine, before, when the fans were satiated by the tour and Grian’s relationship with Scar seemed like a crazy fling. Now, with no new tour announced (thank god), the papers focusing more on Scar, and their relationship going public, things look more serious. This upsets all the people who think they are entitled to Grian’s life.

Once online threats start coming in, Scar gets jumpy and nervous. He asks Grian if they can stay at home, get their groceries delivered, etc. Grian appreciates Scars worries, and doesn't mind taking a few lazy days, so she agrees. At least they get to cuddle some more. But they both feel cooped-in. Trapped, within Scar’s house, constantly on the look-out for hidden reporters.

Grian decides she can’t live her life on hold forever. As much as it scares her, she loves performing and she wants to reignite that passion somehow. She agrees to attend a small local gig, an exclusive thing which doesn’t get announced on social media. It’s meant to be her stepping stone back into the world of performing. It’s meant to promote the new album, really. That’s all.

Scar stands backstage, watching from the wings and doing his job keeping Grian safe. Also admiring her with heart-eyes. There are other bouncers in the crowd, but Scar is the closest to Grian, confident in his ability to protect her.

In the middle of the set- and it all seems to happen quite suddenly- Scar feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns to see two young men and a young woman, all dressed in black. He’s about to ask them how they got backstage when one of the men punches him in the face, sending him to the ground.

Now, Scar is a strong guy, and the stranger seems kinda shocked at himself for throwing the punch at all, so Scar has enough time to recover and stand. Instantly, his heart is racing. Adrenaline rushes through him. One thought comes to mind: he has to protect Grian.

Scar assesses the situation. The attackers have no visible weapons. Good. As the second man goes to swing a punch, Scar grabs his wrist. He's much stronger, clearly. Twists the man’s arm around and pushes the guy back until he's tumbling onto the floor.

The girl goes to scratch him, but Scar dodges at the last second. He can hear another security guard, somewhere nearby. If he screams, Grian will hear. She'll stop the set and come to find him. She will be closer to the danger. She could get hurt.

Scar holds his tongue. The first guy tries to come in again, and again Scar blocks the attack, but he doesn't see the second man getting back up. He’s one against three. It’s a miracle he made it as long as he did.

He's on the floor before the pain of the hit even registers. This time, they're quicker than him. He receives a kick to the chest. Something snaps. For a stunned second, the attackers pause. The breaths catch in his throat painfully.

He thinks they might kill him. It's a horrible thought, but it's not an unrealistic one. The three assailants all land hits and kicks, never giving Scar enough time to stand.

They finish their assault as suddenly as they attacked. With horror, Scar thinks they're going to go onstage. They're going to hurt Grian. But, no. They turn back the way they came. One of them says something. About stealing, or deserving, or...

Scars ears are ringing.

As they walk away, he blacks out.

Hospital Visit Two

Grian is the one who finds Scar, coming backstage during a break. Her scream is enough to alert the crew. Obviously, the show is cancelled. An ambulance is called for Scar and a search takes place for the attackers, but no one can find anyone suspicious. Later, more anonymous posts on social media brag vaguely about how they showed that bodyguard that he doesn't deserve Ari.

When Scar wakes up in hospital, Grian is right there waiting, looking like a mess. The rest of the tour crew are there too, glad to see Scar awake. Grian's hair has been cut even shorter, in messy, jagged clumps. Scar briefly wonders if he did that in the hospital bathroom.

He asks if Grian is okay, to which Grian breaks down crying. She practically screams at Scar that he should be worried about himself. He broke a rib and has a head injury, for goodness’ sake! Scar says that’s not his job. Grian freezes up. She tells him quietly that his safety should always come before Grian's own. Scar repeats that his job is to keep Grian safe, no matter what.

Grian realises that Scar would do anything for her, and that's terrifying. He could have died, today, and he didn't call for help. Grian knows she would have heard him if he had called for help. So she asks Scar why. Scar tells the truth: he wanted to make sure Grian wouldn't come running towards the danger, because that's his job.

He’s so sure of himself, it’s agonising. Grian knows that Scar's contract isn't the only reason he's so willing to get hurt defending her. Still, she fires him. Right there, on the spot.

The hospital makes Grian feel anxious. The lights flicker, almost like the flashing of cameras. She cut her hair with tiny scissors in the hospital bathroom, to keep herself grounded, and to keep herself from doing anything stupid. She thinks about how she brings pain to everyone around her- how she took Scar away from a normal life.

They are only in the hospital for a few more days. Scar and Grian go home together, and make no announcements to the press. Grian gets Mumbo to call Scar’s boss and make sure he’s fired. Not out of malice- they talk about it, of course, and she has enough money for both of them- but because she isn’t sure if she can handle Scar taking on any more dangerous jobs.

A Break, A Breakdown

After Scar is out of the hospital, Grian decides to take another indefinite break, pulling back into isolation, even becoming more distant from Scar. Scar obviously knows something is wrong, but chalks it up to Grian being upset with him about his own recklessness. A rift grows between them, despite living together.

Moving house to escape reporters and cameras doesn’t help much with the growing tension, either. Not for the first time, Scar realises just how complicated his life has become.

Grian becomes increasingly closed-off, no matter what Scar says or does. Jokes don't land. Conversation runs dry. She just doesn’t seem happy. Scar starts to grow irritable, too, not enjoying being stuck indoors and left with frequent nightmares surrounding Grian and their various attackers. It all seems rather bleak.

Until, one day, Grian is happy. Carefree. Better. Scar isn’t an idiot. He knows what's happening. He doesn't want to believe it, but he's heard enough stories from friends and family to know what's about to happen. For lack of better words, Grian has been depressed, now suddenly she’s joyful again? Yeah, no, Scar doesn’t buy it.

He calls the crew. It's an emergency. Grian isn't well. As the day goes on, Scar doesn't let Grian out of his sight. Once she starts an argument about needing to use the bathroom in peace, Scar tells her what he thinks is going on. He has reason to believe she's actively suicidal.

A shocked silence. From the look on Grian’s face, Scar knows he was right. Grian mumbles something about it not being Scar's job to protect her anymore. Scar tells her it is. It's his job as a partner to make sure Grian stays alive. He doesn't expect Grian to break down crying in front of him, but that's been happening a lot lately. Or, Scar has heard it a lot, through closed doors.

This time Scar is able to offer comfort, to hold her somewhat awkwardly in his arms and whisper that it'll be okay. Even to Scar, it sounds like a lie. He was never really good at emotional things, always more helpful with the physical- sharing honey tea for a sore throat, or putting himself between Grian and the cameras.

The thing about Grian, is that once he starts speaking, it’s hard to get him to stop. As soon as Scar opens the door, she’s off on a rant. Of course, he listens, but it hurts to hear. Grian’s so sick of it all. His body, his art, his relationships, his life. They’re all objects in the eyes of the press and the fans. She’s not even safe to just be with Scar- her existence puts them both in so much danger. And she's not perfect anymore. She's corrupted and wrong and they can smell it on her like bloodhounds. Every imperfection is amplified or ignored in favour of viewing her as this untouchable idol that Scar is selfishly taking for himself. Grian just wants it to stop.

#ben chats shit on the internet #ari au #hermitcraft #hermitblr #scarian #gtws #gtwscar #goodtimeswithscar #grian #long post #hermitshipping

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