#this is my brother and I need a shovel to love him etc etc | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

abizarreyodelingincident · 2 months ago

Text

Shovel Love (Jason)

Snow tickled the tip of his nose as Jason fumbled with his keys. His gloves were too thick for his pockets, and his grocery bags made any maneuvering unnecessarily complicated. He was not dropping the cereals on the sidewalk. Half of it was covered in melted slush that would instantly destroy the package. He’d never live it down.

So, he might have had to bite on his gloves, ignore the taste of leather and keep an arm elevated to balance his bags, but he did get his keys out without accident.

The triumph was short-lived though, as the hair on the back of his neck suddenly tingled.

“What do you want?” Jason asked, not looking away from the door.

There was the faintest sound of snow crunching behind him.

“I came to give you a warning,” Nightwing hissed, his voice low and dark, as threatening as anything Jason had ever heard.

And he had heard a lot of threats from his big brother. The perils of tugging Batman’s cape.

“You’re a bit late for that,” Jason scoffed, a corner of his lips twitching into a smirk. “Already had the Arrows and most of the Titans give me their speech weeks ago. What took you so long?”

The scowl on his brother’s face deepened.

Nightwing was the type of man that worked three superhero shifts and still tried to hold a day job. He was always in movement, always everywhere he needed to be. It made him reliable and popular with multiple generations of heroes at this point. But it also meant he had no roots anywhere. He got gossip later than most, and he was not always in a position to make good on that intel right away. Multiple crises owing.

This was probably the first free moment he had gotten since he had learned that Jason was in a relationship with Roy Harper.

Understandable. But Jason didn’t really care for that excuse.

“I was busy. Others told me they’d already seen you, but I still wanted to show up for Roy.”

This time, Jason did snort. Sure. Everyone wanted to be there for Roy. And he had not ended up friendless in rehab either. God, he hated them sometimes.

A gloved fist struck the door right next to his head.

Jason turned around. Nightwing boxed him against the door. He was shorter, sure, but that did nothing to lessen the actual threat in his stance. Jason had seen him take down behemoths like Bane or Croc without a scratch after all.

“Enough,” Dick growled.

It was also hard to ignore the fact that Dick had shown up in armor while Jason only wore a winter coat for protection. And a bag of groceries hardly compared to escrima sticks with the power of cattle prods.

“I don’t care what game you think you’re playing-”

“Not a game,” Jason bit out, irritated despite his best efforts.

“When you break Roy’s heart, I will make you regret toying with my friend for another one of your fucked up taunts.”

“Not everything is about you.”

It took skills to convey an eye roll behind a domino mask. Nightwing managed effortlessly.

“Of course not.” His voice turned snide. “When is it never not about Jason Todd with you?”

“Not even gonna dignify that one. So, you gonna break me in half if I hurt Roy. Cool. Message received. Are you done?”

Wrong thing to say. His dismissive tone was obviously interpreted wrong, because Nightwing bristled.

“If you think I won’t-”

“Yeah, yeah, ten out of ten, Dick. But like I said, you ain’t the first one to give that speech. I’ve already been threatened to be skewered, deafened, decapitated, frozen in the speedforce, drowned, pulverized, thrown to a hell dimension, etc. etc. with the promise that it would make what the Joker did to me seem tame.”

Nightwing did twitch then, but it was a small thing, and quickly buried away if it was ever there. Jason didn’t bother putting stock in it.

“I guess no one really threatened lobotomy if you want to go there. Wait, no, one of his psychic teammates did. Look, at this point, just say you’re gonna beat me to death with your bare hands and save us both the time.”

Nightwing’s fists clenched, and his skin paled another shade.

It could be anger, horror, any number of things. Jason had no intention to decipher it.

The scar on his neck was throbbing, like it wanted Jason to remember. Funny how that always happened around heroes.

“I really don’t care what a bunch of hypocrites like you think of me, Dick. If you wanna break your moral codes on me, go for it, you wouldn’t be the first. Hell, it wouldn’t even be your first time either.”

The frown slipped for a second, replaced by surprise, by outrage. God, Nightwing was winding himself up again, and Jason just really wanted to go put this fucking carton of milk in the fridge before it went bad.

“Night, Dick. Glare at me through the windows if you still want to be intimidating, but I’m done talking. You’ll kill me, message received. Now, fuck off.”

And he twisted his keys in, pushing the door open and slipping inside in an instant.

He slammed the door closed behind himself, and he snorted when the doorknob immediately rattled. Didn’t open without a key to the building. Obviously, Nightwing could break in. He probably wouldn’t though. He’d said what he wanted to, and Dick had never wanted to speak to Jason longer than necessary.

He would definitely be doing some surveillance tonight though. He would be on high alert, probably under the impression that now that the main player had shown up, Jason would be putting his diabolical plans into action. Damn. He should close the curtains first thing as he enters, but that would be just inviting Dick to bring in every friend he had to mount a ‘rescue’.

Jason liked this apartment. They had picked it together. It had enough space for them, was in the right part of town to be close to action when they went out as vigilantes, didn’t cost both their arms to buy…

It was in Star City, but nothing could be perfect.

Jason climbed out the last of the stairs and played with the keys for a second before he entered his home.

Roy dropped the arrowhead he’d been working on, and stood up from the dinner table.

“Jaybird!”

Roy had a tendency to light up whenever he saw someone he cared about. It didn’t matter if Jason was leaving for a black out ops that would take a week or two or if he was going on a walk, the second he was back, Roy’s smile went wide and the knots of tension in his body all went slack at the same time.

It didn’t matter how many times Jason came back, Roy exuded relief every time.

(Not a lot of people stayed for Roy.)

The grocery bags found their way to the kitchen counter. The carton of milk could wait.

“Hey,” Jason said as he grabbed onto his partner’s hips, “missed me?”

“Yup,” Roy chirped, right before he leaned forward and met Jason with a gentle kiss.

For a second, all was right in the world. And because he was Jason Todd, that feeling truly only lasted a second. He wanted to abandon himself in his lover’s arms, those beautiful biceps that pulled incredibly powerful bows to nail insane targets from equally insane distances. Even if he did not deserve that kind of peace, Jason was too greedy not to want it. But he could already feel someone’s eyes on them. Huh. That really did fuck up the mood, didn’t it?

They parted.

“Who was it this time?” Roy asked after a moment, his shoulders dropping in exhaustion.

Jason offered the smallest smile. “Dear old Dickiebird. He’s probably watching us as we speak.”

Roy pinched the bridge of his nose. He briefly closed his eyes, and muttered some absolutely filthy curses that would have made a sailor blush. Then, with a determined stride, he marched right up to their living room’s window. He made a show of scanning the night, then flipped off the figure perched on the rooftop opposite to theirs.

Jason devolved into giggles. Giggles! Him! And in front of a witness too. It was a good thing no one would ever believe Roy that Jason was capable of anything other than snarls and sneers.

The funniest part of all these threats was that all these paragons somehow thought Jason would still be alive after he lost the last person to ever care about him. Was he supposed to care if they chose to spit on his corpse or reduce it to ash? It’d only help make sure Jason would not come back again.

***

Nightwing’s visit was nothing out of the ordinary, besides the tardiness. Jason had a reputation. It pissed Roy off to no end how so many people would parade around their place now and offer him unconditional support in kicking Jason to the curb if needed. Jason honestly would have thought it was kind of sweet, if it was not disgustingly hypocritical.

Roy had once been the black sheep of the hero community.

But the blackest sheep of them all wore a Red Hood.

Also, on occasion, an apron to cook. A cheesy, horny one that said ‘Kiss the cock’ with a cartoony rooster on the front. Roy always waggled his eyebrows at Jason when he wore it. What was he supposed to do? A man was weak.

At least, the horny promises in those eyes usually waited after they had eaten whatever Jason had slaved over in his pots and pans.

Tonight’s menu was a honey glazed salmon that had been priced just in that sweet spot of affordable on sale they always looked for. It did look good, if Jason said so himself. He poked at it with his knife, his mind on other things. He should not wait any longer. It was almost the twenty-fourth. Any later and it would hurt worse.

He hated himself a bit more for it though.

“Hey, Roy?” Jason said softly.

Roy hummed lazily, blowing over the steaming piece of fish. “Jaybird? What is it?”

“I don’t think I’ll be able to make it to Queen’s for Christmas Dinner. ”

Roy froze. He stared, uncomprehending, his fork still suspended in the air with a piece of salmon, held in a tightly clenched hand. He stopped breathing. His eyes filled with an emotion that was so rare in him.

Fear, in a way no army of mimes or evil robots or space dragons could ever evoke.

“I got a lead on the trafficking ring,” Jason said.

The shift was immediate. Whiplash even. Roy nodded, mind set.

“Then I’m coming with you.”

Jason made a show of hesitating. The last thing he wanted was to pull his partner away from the people he loved. Especially when things had been so rough between them before. It would do no one any favor if Roy bailed on them now.

“You should go see your family.”

“Jason,” Roy scoffed.

“They wouldn’t be happy if I pulled you away from the holidays for work.”

A flash of fiery emotion burned through Roy’s voice. “So what? I should let you do this without backup because Ollie wouldn’t get into the Christmas Spirit otherwise?”

“We already scouted things. We don’t need to both be there to crash the operation. I’ll be on frequency. If I need the backup, I can call the rest of the birds. They’ll show up.”

They wouldn’t, because Jason would not tell them anything. But there was a slight possibility that they would have shown up if they knew the trafficking ring was legit and not a trap.

“I don’t like this, Jaybird. We’re a team…”

“I’ll be fine. Nothing will happen to me. And it’s better this way. Do you really think the arrows wanted me polluting their dinner table? I can see Queen’s glare from here.”

“So you should be alone on Christmas instead,” Roy whispered miserably. “Jaybird… ”

Guilt started to gnaw at Jason’s bone, but he held firm. He wrapped his arms around his man and placed a light kiss on his cheek.

“I’ll be okay, Roy. Not my first time. Trust me, you won’t miss anything busting up scum’s kneecaps. Okay, except maybe some catharsis, but we can do that any other time. Just go spend the time with your family. I’ll be there when you come back. What will you do with the gifts you’ve bought otherwise? Come on, Roy. You’ve been looking forward to that dinner for months.”

Which was exactly why Jason had timed everything to be unavailable at the last minute. He had taken the hints a while ago. He was not going to ruin things for Roy to impose on people that hated him.

***

Jason did not react to the sound of their bedroom door slowly opening.

He pretended not to hear Roy’s sharp intake of air, or his sigh of relief. They did not poke at each other’s open wounds. They’d never survive if they started acting like their families. For all Jason was the biggest stain on superhero society, that spot had once belonged to Roy. Blame was an insidious game. It snuck up on you. It made fathers throw their kids out in the street. So, they just didn’t.

Jason pretended to stir only when the bed dipped, because it would be completely nonsensical for a bat not to notice.

(Roy, of course, knew.)

(They knew a lot of things about each other that they never put into words.)

“Had fun?” he mumbled into his pillow.

Roy pressed himself against Jason’s back, warm, almost feverish. His arms circled Jason’s waist, his nose tickled the middle of Jason’s back. Like he didn’t want to risk Jason seeing his face.

“Yeah. You? Wiped out the whole operation?”

“Purged the whole thing. Got a bunch of kids to their parents, or the cops for those who lived out of town. ”

A faint tension seemed to fall into the room.

Jason should not have said that.

Roy’s body was trembling.

“They put up a plate for Lian… ”

Oh, Roy.

“Dinah gave a speech. It was…” Roy sniffed. “It was really pretty. Lian would have loved it. Everyone ended up crying. Fuck, I… I really would have given up everything for her to be there with us then. I… I would have wanted you there, Jaybird.”

Jason bit his lips, staring ahead at their bedroom wall. Anywhere but back.

“Sorry, Roy.”

Should he have gone anyway? In his guts, he knew it would have been a disaster. Everyone else would have been so pissed if he had witnessed their moment. He was well aware of what Queen thought of him. He’d hissed it to him once.

Why in the name of all that was good was he the one that came back to life?

Jokes on Queen, Jason had been having those thoughts long before he and Roy ever became an item. Before the whole of the hero community seemingly rallied behind Roy for once in their goddamned lives.

As Robin, he had died under the impression that he had been loved. That he had been a good hero, and that he had had a better run than most kids in his circumstances would have.

And then he had woken up in his own coffin.

How many of them had told him he had wasted every opportunity to be welcomed back?

To what? He’d thought about asking them again and again. To a father who had disowned him in death, turned him into a cautionary tale for the other sidekicks? To a community that had forgotten him? To a battle that featured all the same monsters, only bolstered by even more abominations like Professor Pyg?

Jason had died thinking he had been loved, and some cruel cosmic force had decided to show him how wrong he had been.

Batman had told him, between even more lectures, that it was natural that a father would be filled with righteous fury at the death of his son. That it was expected he’d try to retaliate. To kill his son’s killers.

Funny that, right? But Jason had also forgotten how Bruce had claimed not to be Jason’s father. His fucking fault for getting it wrong. For letting himself believe. For giving Batman a second chance, one desperate chance to show Jason had not been just a fool to believe three years of partnership meant something.

He had long stopped being annoyed whenever someone got his motives wrong. He had been screaming everything he wanted and needed and was trying to accomplish, and not one of them got it right. Half the bats thought he had tried to force Batman to kill the Joker, for fuck’s sake.

(The irony of them thinking Bruce needed to be forced to kill someone made Jason’s scar ache.)

(The irony of them thinking he had only come back from the dead once .)

“Do you want to go see her tomorrow?” Jason asked.

Roy nodded against his back, stifling another bout of sobbing. Tightening his grip as if he would drown without that touch.

“We’ll buy her a bouquet of daffodils and white lilies.”

“And red carnations.”

“Yes. Those too.”

The keening sound Roy made threatened to rip Jason’s heart in two. He felt himself shudder, his insides growing cold as he placed his hands over Roy’s, as he leaned into his partner’s touch.

“Roy, I’m here,” he whispered urgently.

“Don’t leave me, Jaybird. Please, don’t leave me. I can’t lose anyone else. I’m sorry. I know they hate you, I keep telling them to knock it off, but they never listen. They told me again tonight. They keep saying it’s Jade all over again. It’s not. I know it’s not. I’m sorry. Please don’t leave.”

“I’m here,” he repeated. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Slowly, he managed to twist himself inside Roy’s dead grip, managed to turn around to face his partner in crime and in life.

“Everyone leaves. Even Kori,” Roy whispered, despair choking him.

“I’m not leaving you. I’m here. Roy, I’m here. I won’t leave and I won’t die. I love you.”

Roy gave him a kiss mixed with tears. “I love you.”

Jason was certain that more heroes would come out of the woodwork and posture at him eventually. They would threaten and reason and bargain and every other thing they could think of to protect Roy from Jason.

But when he held Roy in his arms after another nightmare, another beautiful dream where Lian was alive, another listless night when his arms itched with cravings , Jason knew he would be there until the day Roy got sick of him.

Like everyone else.

But not a moment sooner.

#jayroy #fic #jason todd #roy harper #angst #shovel talks #probably how the anti imagines jayroy should go #honestly fun angst concept #even your boyfriend family's threatens him to treat you right #no one is even looking at you bad though

85 notes · View notes

irrealisms · 1 year ago

Text

diptych || a c!crimeboys web weave

[sources and IDs under cut]

The first collage is a collection of 14 images.

Image 1: A human hands a raccoon a gun. It is the same image CC!Wilbur sent CC!Tommy with the caption "Me passing the dirty crime boy title to you."

Image 2: Question 4 of 15 Do you love your brother? Answers, please choose 1

Image 3: WILBUR: This isn't just a silly river delta to me anymore, it's got a name, it's got a story, it's— it's L’Manberg, and it's … to me it's, it's you.

Image 4: A painting of Cain and Abel. Cain holds a club in one hand and Abel's wrist in the other as they walk forward. While it is in the background and mostly covered by the other images, their faces and hands are visible.

Image 5: Question 5 of 15 Liar. You feel guilty, don't you? Answers, please choose 1

Image 6: A screenshot from The Fall by SAD-ist. Wilbur has his hand on Tommy's shoulder and is leaning forward to speak to him. Tommy looks anxious.

Image 7: "Am I my brother's keeper?"

Image 8: A piece of paper pinned to the wall, reading "Someone is looking up to you. Don't let that person down." In the context of the collage, it is pinned onto Wilbur's sleeve/upper arm from the SAD-ist screenshot.

Image 9: Question 6 of 15 But you're the one that left him. Answers, please choose 1 [check mark next to the selected answer] I wanted to and I wanted it to hurt him so he could let go of me.

Image 10: WILBUR: I’m glad, Tommy! You know what, I’m glad! Because me and you were never good for that server. We just weren’t!

Image 11: When I close my eyes I'm climbing in the dark Trying not to fall apart Sometimes I get so high Falling is the only out I see And I don't wanna take you down with me

Image 12: a softer world comic. the text reads "At my worst, I worry you'll realize/you deserve better./At my best, I worry you won't."

Image 13: Question 7 of 15 Do you think your brother loves you? Answers, please choose 1

Image 14: WILBUR: Tommy, come over here, please, I— Tommy, I was scared I wouldn’t see you again if you didn’t forgive me. And I didn’t want to not see you again.

The second image is a collage of 11 images.

Image 1: WILBUR: You love it, don’t you, Tommy? You love… L’Manberg…

Image 2: a softer sea comic. the text reads "You're my brother and I love you./That's it./No punchline."

Image 3: A painting of two men standing next to each other. they look similar. the one on the right puts his hand flat above both of their heads, sheltering them; the one on the left has his hand up to touch the hand of the one on the right. the painting is titled My Brother's Keeper.

Image 4: I will stand in the dark for you I will hold you back by force I will stand here right outside your door I won’t see you disgraced I will protect your name and your heart Because I miss my friend

Image 5: A screenshot from Final Waltz by SAD-ist. Wilbur has his hand on Tommy's shoulder. Tommy looks up at him.

Image 6: In essence, the entire Bible is written as an affirmative response to this question.

Image 7: TOMMY: I believe that everyone’s got a little bit of good in them. And I know that Wilbur had good in him. Alright?

Image 8: This is no garden. This is my brother and I need a shovel to love him.

Image 9: A collage of an open book with forests, butterflies, etc. the text reads: i care for you still and i will forever.

Image 10: A painting of two young boys wading in the ocean and holding hands. The smaller one has spiderman swim trunks.

Image 11: TOMMY: It’s not about chances, Foolish. It’s about making sure you don’t give up on the people you care about.

#mcyt #dsmp #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #crimeboys #c!tommy #c!wilbur #c!crimeboys #wilbur #tommy #web weaving #web weave #collage #my edit

408 notes · View notes

punkshort · 1 year ago

Note

i had an idea to add to the ‘str’ extras post. i came across an insta account that details “things ____ loves/hates” (i will link an example, credit to them for the idea), thought it could be an interesting, insightful look into sheriff!joel, of things you haven’t touched on but that makes up the wonderful man we have grown to love!

no rush if you decide to do it just a fun lil thing i thought of <3

https://www.instagram.com/p/C3BLN86OquE/?igsh=MWF0aG0ydzA4c3BnZg==

I like this idea! And I am very much looking for a distraction so I decided to have a little fun with it and make a photo collage to go along with my answers:

Likes:

Classic romance novels. I think he likes to keep it a secret but he has a soft spot for the classics (I thought wuthering heights was kind of apt... two people unable to be together, etc...)

Coffee. It's an obvious one, but maybe not so obvious is he prefers to share coffee with someone else. That's why he always found himself going to the diner, even before reader came on the scene. He just likes to be around others, even if it is his annoying younger brother.

Texas - duh. Sheriff Joel couldn't imagine living anywhere else, especially up north. He is a southern boy through and through.

Lazy mornings. Those are rare for him. Sarah tends to have a busy schedule, even on the weekends, so when he gets the chance to sleep in a little or just lounge around before having to get up, he really enjoys that (especially if reader is there, although he hasn't been able to have many mornings with her... yet 👀). To go along with this, he also really likes kissing. Just making out with no goal in mind. Slow, lazy licks and soft little noises under a warm blanket on a Sunday morning with nowhere to be? Perfection.

Old movies. Especially at the drive in. Something about the nostalgia of it really makes him happy. And that romantic side of him can't help himself. It's usually his go-to first date idea.

Football. As Sarah mentioned once before, he really enjoys American football and annoys her with it. Sarah really looks forward to the spring and summer because there's no football on TV and she doesn't have to listen to him yelling in the living room every ten minutes.

His favorite pair of jeans. He's had them for years, the knees are getting worn out but he loves them and won't part with them.

Sarah - obviously. Even though she keeps him on his toes and super busy all the time, he would drop anything for her. He is always struggling to balance work and home and he tends to stretch himself too thin and not take enough time for himself, but he tries to make every single soccer game and school event because he loves seeing how talented Sarah is.

Hiking, specifically with Sarah. It's something they like to do in the summer, at least one weekend a month. Occasionally he can convince her to camp out overnight, but she hates sleeping in a tent so it's a hard sell.

Dislikes:

People who don't use their seatbelts. It's so easy. Just do it. He's seen too many accidents in his line of work and he hates when people don't use them.

Snakes. Sarah never lets him forget about the time when he was nine years old and he went to put on his boot to go play outside and was surprised to find a snake sleeping inside. To this day, he can't put his shoes on without checking them first.

Oysters. It's a texture thing, he thinks they're gross. He doesn't care they are an aphrodisiac, he doesn't need it 😉

Line dancing. Even though he's from Texas, it makes him cringe every time he sees people doing it.

Snow/being cold. He prefers the heat. It's what he's used to and he doesn't like shoveling snow on the rare occasion Texas gets any accumulation.

Lip Gloss. He likes kissing. A lot. And he thinks lip gloss is too sticky.

Wool Sweaters. Because he runs hot as it is and wool just makes it worse. Plus, it's itchy.

People who talk about themselves too much. Especially women he's been on dates with. He likes learning about other people, but when it becomes apparent they have no interest in learning about him, it's a turn off.

Golf. Because all my Joels hate golf. For no particular reason at all.

Thank you so much for this ask! It was a lot of fun putting together.

#anon ask #ask #STR fic #sheriff!joel

61 notes · View notes

geralt-of-baevia · 10 months ago

Text

Call It What You Want: Chapter Five

pairing: nooutbreak!joel x f!ofc (Violet Fletcher)

rating: explicit, MDNI 18+

word count: 3.1k

summary: Seeking solace from a painful breakup, Violet relocates to a tranquil town, purchasing a neglected house to renovate. In her new neighborhood, she befriends Harlow, who introduces her to Joel, a gruff and seasoned contractor with a heart of gold. Despite Joel's initial grumpiness, Violet finds herself drawn to his expertise and hidden kindness.

As Violet immerses herself in home renovations alongside Joel, their dynamic begins to shift, with Joel unexpectedly opening himself up to the possibility of love. Their budding relationship faces challenges as shadows from their pasts emerge, testing their newfound connection.

warnings/tags: hints at a daddy kink, groping, dry humping, grinding, etc.

a/n: alright, something FINALLY happens! yay! and oooo drama is staaaarting. i love it.

In the first week of our deal Joel and I were both very busy. I had made french dip, beef stroganoff and so many breakfasts and pastries. All while he had patched my deck, put up a new shower curtain, fixed part of my roof and fixed the air conditioning with his brother Tommy’s help.

There was constant commotion at the house, but it was something I thrived on. It was nice to have something do do every day. To have a reason to get up and bake. I hadn’t done much of that since I had sold the bakery six months before. I didn’t realize how much I had missed it.

I learned that breakfast was Joel’s favorite meal very quickly. Since we were both early birds, most mornings I had coffee and food ready to go when he got to the house. Friday morning I decided to make my favorite; biscuits and gravy. When Joel came through the kitchen door, I was just pulling the biscuits out of the oven.

“It smells amazin’ in here,” he said, setting his toolbelt down next to the door in a thud. “Whatcha making?”

“Biscuits and gravy.”

“Mmm, my favorite.”

A silly grin spread across my face. “It’s mine, too.”

Joel came over and made our cups of coffee while I plated our food. We took our breakfasts and headed out to the sun porch to eat. Earlier in the week Joel moved a couch and coffee table into the once empty room for us. It was such a nice place to sit and look outside and enjoy company. I loved our little routine.

“How is your arm feeling this morning?” he asked before shoveling a bite of food into his mouth. I could sense something was up with Joel by his body language, but I couldn’t tell if I was making it up or not.

“It’s getting better. I’ve been doing my exercises and stretches that the doctor recommended. And I haven’t had to take a pain pill in at least three days,” I told him proudly. My forehead was healing nicely, too, it only needing a bandaid over the stitches.

“Well that’s very good to hear.”

As we ate our meals in silence, I could sense something was definitely making Joel apprehensive.

“Hey, is everything okay?” I asked through a bite.

“Hmm?” he asked, turning to face me. It was like I had snapped him back to reality.

“Is everything okay, Joel? You’ve been acting kinda odd since we sat down to eat,” I explained. He sighed in response.

“Everythin’s fine,” he stated. I cocked an eyebrow at him. “I’ve just been meanin’ to ask you somethin’ since yesterday, but I couldn’t get the nerve up to last night. So I told myself this mornin’ on the way here that I was gonna ask ya.”

My heart began pattering in my chest.

“Well, just ask me then.”

“Um, I have a buddy from the school I work at that’s getting married this weekend,” he started, “and I was wondering if you’d like to go with me?”

I gave him a coy smile. “Like as your date?”

“Yes, as my date,” he said, nudging his shoulder into mine.

“How fancy are we talking?”

He paused. “...is that a yes, then?”

I giggled. “Yes, I’ll go with you.”

He beamed at me, and his face softened with relief. It was adorable.

“So, how fancy?” I asked again, “Like, do I get to see you in a tux or something?”

“No, not that fancy. But it’ll definitely be a dres nice for the occasion type of wedding.”

“When is it?” I asked before taking a drink of my coffee.

“It’s tomorrow at 11am in the town over. I’d pick you up around 10:15. Is that okay?” he asked.

I nodded. “That sounds great.”

The next morning I rushed around trying to get ready. I had decided to keep my hair and make up simple, but I was still nervous. Thankfully Harlow was coming as well, and Joel’s brother Tommy as her date.

I looked myself over in the mirror, fiddling with my hair and smoothing my light pink dress over my thighs. I hadn’t been to a wedding in a long time. The next one was supposed to be my own, but that had obviously changed.

At almost 10:15 on the dot, I heard Joel’s familiar knock at my door. After looking myself over once more, I ran downstairs. I opened the door, it revealing Joel looking as handsome as ever. He had on a green plaid shrit with his sleeves rolled up, showing off his forearms, a pair of nice jeans and boots. His curly salt and pepper hair was combed back, and his facial hair freshly tidied.

“You look so handsome,” I told him, the words falling out of my mouth before I could stop them. His face lit up, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

“Um, well thank you,” he said timidly, his bashfulness coming out. “You look gorgeous.”

My cheeks grew hot and my eyes met the ground.

“Thank you,” I told him, chewing nervously at my bottom lip, “It’s not too much?”

He shook his head, his brow knitting together. “Not at all. Are you ready to go?”

“Yes, let me grab my bag.”

I grabbed my purse and my shoes and locked up the house. Joel and I got into his truck and pulled out of the driveway, off in the direction of the wedding. I threw my shoes and purse on the floor before turning in my seat to face him. I rested my back against the door and pulled my feet up to rest on the space between us, hugging my knees.

“You comfortable?” he asked sarcastically. I pushed his thigh with my foot. “Hey! That’s my driving foot.”

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, dad.”

His eyes snapped over to me at my comment, his eyes stern. It was a look that made the space between my thighs surge with heat.

“So um,” I started, shifting in my seat a little, “How long have you known the couple getting married?”

“I’ve known Bill and Frank for at least 20 years. We first met through an old friend,” he told me, taking his eyes off the road occasionally to look at me while he spoke. I nodded. I could tell there was apprehension in his voice.

“...and?” I asked, knowing he had more to say.

“...and they’re getting married because Frank is sick and they want to get married before he passes away,” he concluded. My heart dropped into my stomach. It was so bittersweet.

“That’s - heartbreaking,” I said, not knowing what else to say. I heard him sniff, so I learned forward and put a comforting hand on his knee. “But it’ll also be beautiful.”

He looked over and me and gave me a have smile, his eyes brimming with tears. I gave his knee a squeeze before he took it in his own. He brought it up to his lips and kissed the back of my hand. I smiled.

“Thank you for comin’ with me.”

“Of course.”

The wedding was absolutely beautiful. It wasn’t anything spectacular or over the top. Just a simple wedding in the backyard of Bill and Frank’s beautiful house. There was maybe only about 30 of us there in total, and not one of us had a dry eye by the end of it. I had packed tissues in my bag and I had never been so thankful I had done so.

After the ceremony everyone mingled and ate finger food while Frank rested for awhile. I stood in a corner of the garden with Joel, his brother Tommy, Harlow and their friend Ellie, one of Harlow’s students. She had practically adopted Ellie, and hence so did Joel and Tommy. They were this little blended family that I couldn’t help but admire.

“So, Violet?” Harlow started, pointing an accusing finger at me, “Joel told me the other day that you used to have a full ass bakery?”

“Mmhmm,” I said with a nod, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. I didn’t really want it getting out, but I also didn’t tell Joel not to say something. I couldn’t get upset at him.

“Girl, I have known you for almost four months and you’ve never said anything about it to me? That’s a big deal!” she stated. I shrugged.

“It just wasn’t a big deal to me at the time to talk about,” I said. Tommy smacked Harlow in the arm.

“Did you ever think Harles that maybe she didn’t want to talk about it then?” he asked her, attitude dripping all over his words. She rolled her eyes.

Harlow had been weird to me the entire time at the wedding, and now she was calling me out about something silly like this? I didn’t know what was up, but I didn’t want to worry about that right now. I just wanted to enjoy the wedding with Joel. Joel turned to me, blatantly ignoring the drama from his brother and Harlow.

“Do you wanna go get a beer with me?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said, giving Harlow a side glance. He slipped his arm around my middle and led me away from the group and over to the house.

“Is it just me or is Harlow bein’ weird?” he asked, still looking ahead. I glanced up at him and sighed.

“No, she’s being weird,” I confirmed. We went into the kitchen and Joel grabbed us each a beer from the large cooler by the sink. He opened both of them on the counter before handing me mine nonchalantly.

“Did-did you just open those on the edge of the counter?” I asked, my jaw a little slack. He smirked at me as he took a swig from his beer and shrugged.

“Maybe I did,” he said with a quick wink. The butterflies in my stomach awoke.

Before either of us could say anymore, Bill wheeled Frank into the kitchen from the living room. Frank was looking much more rested than he had after the ceremony.

“How ya feelin’, buddy?” Joel asked Frank.

“Much better, thank you,” he said with a kind smile. He turned his eyes to me. “I didn’t get to meet you before the wedding. I’m Frank.”

He held a hand out to me and I closed the distance between us to shake it.

“It’s very nice to meet you, I’m Violet,” I told him. His smiled widened.

“She’s Harlow’s neighbor,” Joel explained, “Her house is the one I’ve been working on.”

“Oh, so you’re the one who made those croissants then, aren’t you?” Frank questioned. He glanced at Joel with a knowing look, their eyes meeting. Joel blushed, coughing to mask the embarrassment.

“Yes I was. Did you like them?” I asked. Frank scoffed, looking back at Bill with a sarcastic look.

“Tell her Bill, did we like them?”

Bill cracked a small smile on his stoic face. “Violet, those were some of the best damn croissants we’ve ever had.” Frank turned back to me.

“Is there any way I could persuade you to make more for us?” he asked, rubbing his hands together excitedly. I giggled.

“Absolutely. You can consider them a wedding present,” I told him.

“We look forward to it,” he said, “but if you’ll excuse us we have more guests to thank for coming.”

“Of course you two,” Joel said. Frank took my hand in his and gave it a squeeze.

“It was very nice to meet you, Violet,” he said while making unwavering eye contact with me. His eyes were so kind, and his smile one of the most genuine I’d ever seen. It broke my heart that he wasn’t going to be around much longer.

“You too, Frank,” I said, trying to push down my somber thoughts.

As the afternoon continued on, all of the guests wound down and Bill and Frank did some usual wedding traditions. They cut the cake together, folks gave toasts, and finally they had their first dance. Yet again there was not a dry eye in the house as Joel and Tommy helped get Frank to his feet, aiding him in having his first dance with his new husband eye to eye. I would never hear the song ‘That’s How Strong My Love Is’ by Otis Redding the same way again.

After their dance, Joel came back and sat next to me as others joined on the cement patio to dance.

“Hi you,” I said as he wrapped an arm around me, resting it on the back of my chair. He was a little out of breath and rubbed one of his knees with his free hand, muttering about it under his breathe. I giggled. “That was very sweet of you, you old man.”

He gave me another stern glance, but couldn’t hold it for long, cracking a small smile. “Yeah, yeah, thanks.”

We sat together and listened to the music, watching people dance and interact. Joel hummed along with each of the songs, tapping to the beat on my shoulder. I couldn’t help but want to melt back into him and feel the vibrations of the humming in his chest. While I was lost in my thoughts, the song changed. I didn’t notice until Joel got to his feet and held a hand out to me.

“Would you like to dance?” he asked. I nodded, realizing the song was The Mamas & the Papas’ ‘Dream A Little Dream Of Me.’

He helped pull me to my feet and then led me over to the patio. I turned around to face him and he wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling my body close to his. He took my right hand in his, resting it on his chest before putting his hand over mine. I interlaced our fingers as I wrapped my free hand around his neck. He looked down at our entwined hands and smiled. As he began to sway us back and forth, I rested my head against his chest.

I felt him let out of sigh of contentment, pulling me closer to him even still. His fingers dug into my side, like he couldn’t get me close enough. I pulled my head away from his chest to look up at him, my green eyes meeting his deep, dark brown ones. He rested his forehead against mine, slipping his other hand down around my waist. I reached up and linked my hands behind his neck; neither of us breaking eye contact.

When the song was over, it felt much too soon. Without saying a word, Joel broke apart from me and immediately began tugging on my hand, leading me somewhere away from the patio. I followed as he led me to the side of the house, his footsteps impatient. Before I was able to ask him where he was taking me, he turned me around and pinned me to the wall with his hips.

Our eyes met again as I looked up at him. I watched as his gaze flashed down to my mouth and back to my eyes. I nodded my head ever so slightly, giving him permission to do what I know he wanted to do. My heart began pounding as his hands cupped my face, my breaths shallow.

Joel closed the gap between us and crashed his lips against mine. My chest felt like it was going to burst at the seams. I grabbed onto the collar of his shirt, trying to pull him closer to me as his fingers twisted in my hair. His hands left my face, exploring my body as he deepened the kiss. I gasped for air as his lips trailed down my jaw and neckline, his mustache prickling my skin along the way.

I grabbed my arms around his neck as he began hiking up my dress. Heat pooled between my legs as he reached his hands under my thighs and lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around his as he pinned me to the wall again, this time grinding against my center. He moaned against my neck, and I could feel him hardening underneath his jeans each time he dipped his hips into me. My head rested back against the siding as he kissed and bit at my neck greedily.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

We both jumped so hard I almost fell out of Joel’s arms and to the ground. We whipped our heads around to see Harlow standing by the corner of the house, her mouth agape. Joel set me down and helped me with my strap as I pulled my dress back down over my thighs.

“Harles, listen-”

“Don’t Harles me, Joel. I don’t want to hear it from you,” she said, pointing a drunken finger at him. She turned her attention to me, her eyes narrowing at me.

“I can’t fucking believe, you,” she said, pausing before the word ‘you’ for emphasis.

“What the hell are you talkin’ about?” Joel asked, his tone serious and stern.

“When I introduced you guys I was trying to be helpful to you both, not have you go behind my back Violet and fuck him,” she stated flippantly, “and even here? At Frank and Bill’s wedding of all places? You two just had to sneak off like goddamn hormonal teenagers?”

“Harlow, we’re not-”

“Save it, Violet. I saw you come home from staying the night at his place in his clothes,” she accused, scorn in her tone.

“Harlow, this is none of your goddamn business, none,” Joel stated firmly, taking a step between me and Harlow.

“It is my business, Joel. You have been my goddamn older brother since Lucas died. I have seen every woman who has used you in more ways than one, and you always get hurt,” she spat at him, “I just never would have thought that you would be one of those girls, Violet. I’m done here.”

She turned on her heel and left us standing there, dishelved and gobsmacked. Joel started to follow after her, but I grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Joel, don’t. She’s drunk and needs to cool off.”

He nodded in agreement, his chest rising and falling rapidly with his breath. I reached down and grabbed his hand and giving it a squeeze. We went back to the party in silence, and I tried to avoid looking in Harlow’s general direction. The knot in my stomach only got bigger as the afternoon went on.

Once the reception was finally wrapping up, Joel and I said our goodbyes to Bill and Frank. After we got in the car we sat in silence, my brain wracking over what Harlow had said.

“Joel?”

“Hmm?”

“What did Harlow mean by other girls using you?”

He sighed a knowing sigh.

“That’s a story for another day.”

#joel miller fanfic #joel miller smut #joel miller x oc #no outbreak au #no outbreak!joel miller #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #the last of us

16 notes · View notes

l0tu2 · 2 years ago

Text

FUTURE PROJECTS for AO3.

these are all future fanfics i will be publishing on AO3. however, i do need opinions on which ships you would like me to post before the others; which will be deemed more popular, etc. feel free to also add possible ships in the comments below, and i’ll decide if i’ll also add them on. my account is sinssvirtuess, where i will update all stories there.

Kiri x Roxto ⎯⎯ Him

The angered bout replayed in the young teen’s mind, over and over again. What is he to you? Jealous tone from a curled headed metkayina apparent and raw. Felt misplaced and weird — Kiri didn’t even know why she indulged in such affairs of immaturity and rashness. Scene of puffed chests and venomous jabs still clear and surfaced. Had she read their friendships wrong? Did - Did Roxto yearn for more? She couldn’t fathom anything becoming of them. Eyes stared at an open palm, clenching it into a fist. Reminiscing a certain teal hand clasping around it; genuine and loving.

Lo’ak x Ao’nung ⎯⎯ Shared and Halved

Demon-blood. Half-breed. Freak. Despite all the insults thrown in their poison, repeated and recycled, Ao’nung still felt driven to shovel more. Make that four-fingered freak bleed in self-loathing, Yet, after the debacle of the boy’s near-death, and getting the courage to cover for him, reef boy couldn’t find it to continue his onslaught. Instead, he sought to make amends. And as he stood there, hands wrung and eyes downcast, the younger’s presence did not fail to entice something more. Hot breath fanned his face, sneer evident. “I took the fall for you. It’s time for you to pay what you owe, fishlips.”

Kiri x Ao’nung ⎯⎯ Eywa’s Fortune

A breath hitched in her throat, hands clutching the necklace inherited by her mother. Wide, yellow eyes frantically looked around the forest, aware she was not inside her family’s marui. Forest. Trees. Warm body beside her, sleeping soundly. With lowered ears, the girl dared to peek over her shoulder at the teal body — deep in his slumber. Curls splayed across the floor. She remembered. Few weeks after bottled grief, she’d ran here to cry and scream; unaware someone followed behind her. In the midst of her emotion, they’d made a mistake. A grave, grave mistake. Eywa help her.

Tsireya x Kiri ⎯⎯ Under Pretense and Secrecy

She knew it was wrong. Her brother pined after the olo’eyktan and tsahìk’s daughter relentlessly, close to courting. But the young girl was just so kind and warm and smart. Tsireya never judged Kiri for her appearance — welcomed it, even. Complimented her on her beauty which Kiri often failed to see. Tsireya was the one who was beautiful. She was perfect. And although it was just practice in the middle of night, with the promise of girl talk and giggles, their lips still locked in a kiss. A lie of them preparing for their future mates with the excuse to meet again. And, damn, was Tsireya a good kisser.

Roxto x Ao’nung ⎯⎯ Heartache

The heir had enough of this. Roxto had been bitching, moaning, and being a complete dick for no reason. It’s happened ever since the introduction to Ao’nung’s potential betrothed. He’s been dismissal. Downright disrespectful — to the point Tonowari noticed their disarray and commented on it. Time came to confront his friend about it. When he did, Ao’nung never anticipated what happened next. How this truly affected Roxto.

Neteyam x Roxto ⎯⎯ Miracle Boy

“You’re okay. I’m here. I’m here,” a deep, sultry voice comforted. Warm hands cupped a tear-streaked face, eyes full of panic and fear. The nightmare — no, the memory engraved within his mind. Torturing him. Reminding him. Wound in Neteyam’s chest burned and pained, further resulting in tears to spill and his mouth to hang agape, desperate to catch a breath. Once again, the teen before him coddled and cooed, slowly walking him out of his misery and into reality. The present. “Neteyam, just listen to my voice. Empty your mind. Feel your heart,” Roxto whispered in the dark, his tanhí a beautiful constellation.

Lo’ak x Roxto ⎯⎯ Chasing Infinite

They’d been drunk. It hadn’t meant anything. What they did was under the influence. Nothing more — no feelings involved. Images flashed: hands scraping his skin, a hot tongue swiping against his own, desperate pants leaving and affiliating the sparked air between them. A cry of his name. Lo’ak. Lo’ak. Lo’ak. “Lo’ak!”

95 notes · View notes

brzatto · 2 years ago

Note

Okay the anon mentioning that thing about Mikey leaving Carmy the beef and in a way leaving Richie to Carmy IS FANTASTIC

This fucker really said these two idiots will only survive if I force them together.

Also I feel like Richie is dying to take care of someone in a way? Like, he was really good with Tiff and he wants to be a good dad so bad. And then his dead best friend said heard and just shoves this chaotic, broken, mess of a little brother into his arms with no direction or further guidance. And he grew up with this kid right? He saw all the awkward phases and knows him better than most of his family even though it was probably more of an annoyance than genuinely wanting to know.

So he, on a super base level, probably knows Carmy enough to be surprisingly good at keep him alive and healthy?

Mikey gave Richie the human equivalent of a depressed house plant and he's actually doing a decent job at keeping Carmy it alive.

Also

Along this same train of thought, what would Nat and Donna do once they realize Richie and Carmy may be a little closer than they realized? I think Nat would give a fierce shovel talk to Richie and then hug him for a really long time. What about Donna? She's already fucking nuts. I kinda want to explore the idea of her snarling something about Carmy always trying to be Mikey but I also like the idea of her thinking they can support each other better than she ever did.

And I feel like it's just glazed over but the trauma of being in that fucking house? Like Richie's dad wasn't around right? I would argue that's almost better than whatever the fuck Donna was doing.

There's so much to explore there. Add in the stuff while Carmy was away with the fuck face chef and oh Lord this boy needs help.

Do I think Carmy is in a place like Mikey was? No, but not taking care of yourself is a form of self harm and that boy does not even know how to spell self care.

I feel like Richie would better understand and be very aware of those things. They're always yelling at each other but Carmy usually has like a meltdown of some type after. Maybe Carmy hates when someone's close behind him in the kitchen because it makes him think of fuck face chef. Richie clocking in on that and going out of his way to discreetly move people around Carmy quick or to place himself between Carmy and someone else if they have to be behind him. Because if Carmy would let anyone see all the little, broken, scared parts of him it would be Richie.

And possessive, protective Richie who picks up on all these little flinches, self deprecating remarks, the lack of self care, or general depression and putting all the pieces into a picture that he does not like. I think he'd pick it all up and make sure anything that may trigger Carmy is taken care of, within reason, and subtly do things to help or make things easier, all while Carmy is oblivious but also realizing he isn't as stressed as he usually is. And Richie seems very pleased with himself lately.

**I rambled again, sorry. I just love actually having someone to talk to about this pairing ♥️

you’re correct! something that really irked me before s2 came out was the mass richie misinterpretation where everyone thought he was fundamentally a bad person with a few good moments/interactions as opposed to vice versa. the way richie treats carmy is a testament to their closeness but also probably to how estranged they became since carmy left home, when we’re introduced to richie in the pilot he’s visibly very warm and friendly with everyone else in the kitchen (except for fak and syd who are outsiders that carmy chooses to bring in) and is seen being openly affectionate, kissing tina hugging marcus etc etc. richie takes good care of those he cares about and i’m so glad they gave us a glimpse into his dynamic with tiff while she was pregnant because richie was soooooo (biting my fist) i’ve never doubted for a second that he genuinely loved her and i’m glad they showed us them being happy and sweet rather than the deteriorated version of their relationship that probably came after eva was born/mikey’s addiction got worse.

i feel like growing up carmy was relatively sheltered in a way? probably naturally shy and quiet and introverted even when he was younger and in spite of all the chaos in his family i really feel like he was spoiled lol or at least comparatively. especially with the comment richie made to sydney about always being nagged about being careful with carmy i can see nat and mikey both being really protective of him. in opposition richie was definitely the one who’d tease and antagonize him the most but he still clearly had that sense of responsibility drilled into him back then because we can see how instinctual his protectiveness is with carmy even now. i’m still trying to decide what his relationship and dynamic with donna was like when he was younger because in fishes we see him successfully placating her when nat couldn’t, i can’t tell if she’s always favored carmy just for being the youngest or if mikey and nat had to shield him from the brunt of her dysfunctionality growing up or maybe even if she was more stable when he was younger and then her mental health deteriorated/behavior became increasingly more erratic over time?

richie’s a person who naturally receives gratification from doing things for others and feeling useful/needed and that probably manifests itself in a much more competitive/spiteful way with carmy because his feelings towards him are just Like That and carmy is also bad at thanking (not other people just richie specifically) him so it’s not quite as transactional as his dynamic with, for example, tiff where he does things for her and is directly rewarded with affection/praise/seeing her happy. i think at first richie just likes the idea of carmy, who he always knew as just some snot nosed loser and is now a well established name in a competitive and high end industry, still being incompetent in some facets and having to depend on richie for something (even if carmy would NEVER ask for his help first or even admit his dependency), likes the idea of having it to hang over his head etc etc (or at least this is how he justifies it to himself) and then with time it gradually morphs back into a Normal relationship where they’re willing to accept that richie takes care of carmy because he cares about him and carmy accepts it because he also cares about him but because they’re them and they’re difficult we have to go the long way around. this is the plot of bcm essentially

lol for sugar and donna’s reactions i think you summed up my own feelings pretty well. i do have a wip fic that sort of includes how that would go with sugar, but in it they actually don’t tell her about “being together” at all (because they do NOT think of themselves as “being together”) and she finds out herself after carmy has been unofficially living with richie for like the past however many months and is understandably pissed. it’s supposed to be a more lighthearted fic so there’s no seriousness to it but i think having known for richie for so long she’s already intimately familiar with all his loser scumbag asshole tendencies as well as carmy’s bullheadedness and notoriously bad decision making but she also knows richie’s good at heart and carmy needs someone like him in his life. especially in light of richie’s apology to her in s2 and effectively amending their relationship (which meant SO much to me) genuinely i can only see her being mad over them not telling her about it rather than anything else. also i love the implication that mikey and richie were also romantically involved before at some point too and donna weaponizing that… when i choose to incorporate past richie/mikey in my carmrich plots the notion that richie is just another one of mikey’s hand me downs or that carmy is simply mikey’s fill in for richie is always one of carmy’s biggest insecurities and i can’t quite decide if donna would be cruel enough to weaponize that against carmy specifically but the thought has delectable angst potential. your mind

i think about richie’s family life a lot like goodness what was going ON in the jerimovich household that donna berzatto could’ve possibly been the better alternative… in reality i think richie’s mother actually just wasn’t present at all, like i think she probably either died or left when he was a child but since sydney’s mother also passed away when she was young and i doubt they’d repeat that plotline for richie i’m guessing it’s the latter. his father also probably wasn’t around very much because of service, but when he was he was probably a dick because he was a cishet (vine boom) white man (vine boom) in the military (VINE BOOM)

and actually it’s funny that you say that because to me i think carmy would definitely have his own vices, like obviously we see his smoking habit but a personal hc of mine i’ve always had for him even before s2 came out is that he has a bad relationship with alcohol—not to the point of addiction or anything like that but i think he probably abused it a little to cope with mikey shutting him out and stopped once it posed the risk of interfering with his work. if you happen to remember in ch2 of bcm there’s a line where carmy mentions richie knowing carmy doesn’t drink—there’s a reason why and that’ll get expanded on in future chapters! but yeah carmy’s form of self harm definitely manifests itself as self neglect. i’ve seen a lot of people write him with an ed but i don’t necessarily think he has one or that his relationship with food is tainted per se i think his eating habits just reflect his own self negligence. carmy definitely is on his way to developing gastritis if he doesn’t have it already

and this is such a sweet scenario for them i love this >_< anything with richie being attentive, considerate, thoughtful, gentle, tender etc etc i am seated immediately… like sometimes i read my own writing and feel like i’m projecting because i want him so unspeakably badly. always nice to see you in my inbox thank you for this anon 🤍

#sorry for answering this so late >_< was waiting for an opportunity to sit down and give it my undivided attention #because as you can see… i have terminal never stfuitis #but i always love talking about them and hearing other people’s thoughts!!! you can always come to me if you want to 🫶#carmy x richie #carmrich #ask

47 notes · View notes

marshmallowprotection · 2 years ago

Note

I can easily see saeyoung Knowing but not like... Thinking About it until he actually sees it. like passively noticing something vs actively going "oh yeah, that sure is A Thing". like yeah he knows in concept that MC and saeran are together. but it's not until he does see them kiss/etc that the Big Brother Brain goes into overdrive for a few seconds like 'WAIT A SECOND MY PRECIOUS INNOCENT LITTLE BABY BROTHER IS KISSING SOMEONE??!?! HE'S--wait no i knew this' and he just kinda freezes while his brain wrangles itself together

also now bc I'm thinking of saeyoung being an overprotective big bro, I'm positive that in every timelime outside ray's route (assuming all goes well for the twins in said timelines) saeyoung absolutely gives saeran's partner the shovel talk. "listen... as long as you make my little brother happy, we'll get along just fine. but if you hurt him... hmm, i dont think you want to find out :)"

That would make a reasonable amount of sense given the fact that Saeyoung is going to be spending a long time trying to accept that his image of Saeran doesn't match the Saeran that exists today. He sees a young boy who needs help from his big brother, but in reality, the Saeran in front of him now doesn't need to be coddled and has a life of his own. This would also apply to Saeran being with MC.

He'd have to stop himself mid-thought and go, "Oh, right. Saeran isn't a child and he's in a relationship. He's grown up, and he's so strong to be the man he is today. He doesn't need me like he used to. But, he's happy to be my brother and hang out with me without the pretense of survival."

Funnily enough, I think Saeran's MC is the only one who doesn't need to be given the protective big brother talk. You look at the head of the Agency and Saejoong Choi without pissing yourself in fear. You stand up for Saeran when nobody else will. Saeyoung knows how far you go for his brother in this route. The more he learns, the more he respects you.

It's the fact that you'll look Saeyoung in the eyes and tell him, "Listen, you're his brother and he loves you, but if he needs space from you at any time and you force him to be close to you? You'll be dealing with me, Saeyoung." That is what makes Saeyoung understand that you're the right one for his brother. Nobody else would ever dare to do that.

However, if you meet his brother in the Secret Ending as someone who isn't involved with the RFA... or you meet his brother after V's Route where you don't have any idea what he went through? Yeah, protective Saeyoung will come out. Context is key here.

#ask #pastelsapphy #mod kait #mystic messenger #mm #mysticmessenger #mysme #saeyoung choi #choi saeyoung #character analysis #luciel choi #choi luciel #707 #seven

16 notes · View notes

droshaoregon7 · 3 months ago

Text

Life

I had a long weekend with my mom in Chicago....like 5 days. Visiting my mom isn't easy but I need it, at the same time. My mom has dementia, she's thin, she's a fragment of what once was, she only had one decent day with me and the rest was silence. I miss my mom so much. I miss her strong personality, her uber kindness to everyone and anyone. She has a heart of gold. I know my mom is somewhere in this person, but she's locked in and that's just hard for anyone who knows my mom, to watch. Gosh, I miss my mom so much.

This is what I posted on Facebook.

Yesterday, I drove to Naperville from my mom’s house. It was a grey, rainy day. Traffic wasn’t bad but I couldn’t believe how long the drive was from A to B. FYI, this was my daily drive to work. I would leave my house at 5:15a to drop the kids off at my folk’s house, to grab the 7am train to downtown, walk a mile to work. I did this for years. I still remember getting home late to rake the leaves or shovel the snow. I have no idea how I did this.

I visited my brother’s grave. It’s almost 14.5 years that he’s been gone. I miss him, always.

I drove by my very first home (pictured). Lots of treasured memories created in this house.

Feeling incredibly thankful to spend time with my mom/ family.

____________

I got back to Oregon last night. When we landed, I looked at my Facebook and I saw where my kids posted that Mike, a lifetime friend was missing. We've known him since he was in elementary school, he's Tyler's best friend. He/Lauren (wife) and son spent a week at our home in Florida last year. We went to their wedding, etc.... anyway, he's been missing for the last 2 days and Lauren's going crazy, of course. Last night, they found him. He committed suicide. This breaks my heart... for his son, who's only 6/7, his wife, his family, my kids. This makes no sense at all. He was a good kid, great family, was an ER nurse, was well loved by everyone. Mental illness is a real thing but he never exhibited anything. He was just a kid, so much life ahead of him.

If anyone reads this - - please, call me, let me, call your loved ones. You are NOT alone, you are WANTED, you are LOVED. You mean everything to someone. You will be missed by so many.

Hug and love your family daily.

My first home and Manny's grave.

#ericlovesabby #friends #muki #momlove #chicago #familymatters #blessed

0 notes

spiceberrie · 2 years ago

Note

his oratory lmao but like yeah exactly i'm a tkafucker first and foremost he is my wife my special poor little meow meow and i find your takes on him so interesting why don't we want some different vibes in this environment like people should stop trying to limit the diversity of the enrichment in my enclosure

doing SPEECH and DISCURSIVE analysis. like he can be your midwife all you want i'm just introducing some revolutionary ideas such as Why do we bash deadbeat dads (KeithTkachuk) maybe Matty has simply bad vibes etc. and i think most 19ers do not care for brady bc they think his beanie baby swag is unfuckable but that's genuinely the most interesting 19 dynamic to me. like that's his brother and he needs a shovel (aggressive window breaking in their teens) to love him!!!!!

#asks

0 notes

stillchugging-captisjuice · 1 year ago

Text

First thing I noticed, when you said: "I know he meant well, and maybe he was in the right to respond that way, but it hurt."

Whenever I come across something in my past that I feel I would want to change with my own children (like here, with whether to accept or reject an apology) I always look for the third option. You say here that it hurt you, but that you think it might have been the right way to respond. If it was something that hurt me, I look to change it, but I am also mindful to not go to the opposite extreme. Yes, sometimes the opposite is what should have been done, but I think about what the consequences would be, and look for any other option. "...maybe it was the right way to respond, but it hurt." If it hurt you, and you don't want to hurt your own children that way, then find another way.

Second thing I noticed, when you said: "But maybe that's the point. It's supposed to hurt. It's supposed to be devastating, because that's what inspires change."

As a parent, anything and everything you do should be to the benefit of your child. If this pain, the point of which is to cause change, actually causes change (in a good way), then that is a sign that you are doing something right. However, if the same scenario plays out over and over again and nothing changes: the child apologizes every time, and then (whether you accept it or not) continues with what he ought not be doing, then whatever you're doing isn't working. You shouldn't be hurting your child verbally: "I don't accept your apology, you have to change your behavior if you want me to forgive you." That doesn't change your child's behavior for the better. Like @queer-as-used-by-tolkien said, "Make sure your child knows he is loved even when he messes up - that your love is not earned." And you can replace the word 'love' there with 'forgiveness.' The Bible says in Luke 17, verses 3-4, "Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him." Of course, as a parent, you also need to follow up with that and teach them how to succeed in doing the right thing. Don't let unforgiveness be what 'inspires change,' let it be you leading them along the right path, helping them to change, and doing all you can to help them do the right thing. Also, "It's supposed to be devastating" isn't right; if it was devastating, then something needs to change. I don't want to say something devastating to my child.

The parent is the person in the best position to know the heart of their child, and if you can tell that your child in sincere, then you can respond appropriately to that, and help them do the right thing. (If they want to please you, then that should be easy.) If you can tell that your child isn't sincere, and they're just saying it to get away with something/evade punishment, you still need to forgive them, but that doesn't mean you don't punish them. In my house, wrongdoing was always met with punishment, and after the punishment, apologies were made, and then came forgiveness.

You said, "...would it be so bad to say "I accept your apology, but I also want your behavior to change"? Isn't it possible to teach kids that just saying "I'm sorry" doesn't fix everything without rejecting their apologies?"

You can't just tell a child, "I want your behavior to change;" you need to teach them. You need to help them do what you want them to do: teach them what to do when they're angry, don't just tell them "I don't want you to be mad anymore." Tell them to close their eyes and take some deep breaths, or punch a pillow/mattress, or dig in the dirt outside, hit a tree with a shovel. I don't know, just give them some OTHER way to deal with it than what they're currently doing that you don't like (hitting other people/objects, etc.). Don't say, "I accept your apology, but I also want your behavior to change," accept their apology, and then it is YOUR responsibility - as the parent - to teach them how to fix their problem, and then help them to do it (reminding them, etc.). "Isn't it possible to teach kids that just saying "I'm sorry" doesn't fix everything without rejecting their apologies?" The first thing that comes to mind is a child who has accidentally spilled some milk. They immediately apologize, but even though they said they were sorry, they still have to clean up the mess. That's not punishment, that's just the natural consequence. Of course the scenario would be a little bit different when the child does something bad on purpose: eg., is willfully defiant instead of an accidental spill.

I was just reading an article from Psychology Today about apologies, and how too many people just use them to gain instant forgiveness without making any effort afterwards to change their behavior.

But then the author wrote that whenever his short-tempered teenage son apologizes after an outburst of rage, he always responds "I don't want you to be sorry. I want your behavior to change."

That made me feel slightly uncomfortable, because my dad sometimes responded to my apologies in much the same way when I was growing up. And it hurt. I know he meant well, and maybe he was in the right to respond that way, but it hurt.

Some kids – and adults – aren't just trying to use "I'm sorry" as an instant-forgiveness, get-away-with-everything card. Some of us, especially on the autism spectrum and/or with ADHD, have rejection sensitive dysphoria, and to have an apology rejected, especially by a parent, can truly feel like the end of the world.

But maybe that's the point. It's supposed to hurt. It's supposed to be devastating, because that's what inspires change.

Still, might there be some different way to approach it? Instead of "I don't want you to be sorry..." would it be so bad to say "I accept your apology, but I also want your behavior to change"? Isn't it possible to teach kids that just saying "I'm sorry" doesn't fix everything without rejecting their apologies?

I'm curious what other people think.

329 notes · View notes