#this is it this is the last season i need fashion to analyze!!!!!!!!!!

[killadelphias]

i know that behind the scenes vid and most paparazzi photos have been ep1 ep2 i think and theyre all in these same outfits so who knows what else they might wear in the season but they all at least look like something and el just looks bland and sloppy as hell and not interesting. I know she's in hiding but STILL. will looks cute and teen hearthrob protag glow up, mike looks like mike always looks, dustin got a plotline attached to the fit, lucas looks totally 80s. el looks salvo superman bouta rob a burger king. she doesn't look marketable. idk it feels like her story's a bit backburner but maybe i'm just mean i'm a hater, maybe she did piss off the bros lmaoo. js.

[see-arcane]

Our good friend Jonathan Harker is getting ready to leave for his business trip, Mina Murray is picking out a new journal, Lucy Westenra is charming a gaggle of smitten suitors, Abraham van Helsing is wrapping up his lectures, and Castle Dracula is prepping the guest room for a very long stay.

Which must mean that Dracula Season is here again!

 ‘Dracula Season’ being a catchall term for the voracious reading, memeing, writing, illustrating, analyzing, and general fun-having that’s ensued since Matt Kirkland’s project, Dracula Daily, caught on with us back in 2022. The Substack had already been running before then, but it sparked a conflagration as time went on and readers old and new to Bram Stoker’s Dracula—the actual novel, not Coppola’s fanfiction—devoured it in a way that scratched an itch none of us knew we had. Stoker wrote the book in epistolary fashion, clumping sections together as needed for the pacing without perfect adherence to chronological order. Matt went ahead and put all the events in order and proceeded to set up a lovely chain of emails that delivered entries on those correlating dates.

This style of organization and pacing turned out to not only make the virtual book club that much easier to engage with, but left space in-between to stew on the story and relate with the characters themselves. Every day of waiting in the book feels weightier when you have to pace and sweat and worry in tandem with poor Jonathan trapped in the castle or Lucy wasting away or Mina running out the clock before she loses the fight for her own humanity. And while we sat with the story or the lulls between Dracula Seasons, some of us found ourselves craving more of that ghastly gothic horror goodness to the point that we figured:

“Well. Why don’t I make something?”

And then we did! Tons of creative works have been churned out in the wake of Dracula Daily’s high. I figured that while we’ve still got a bit of time to wait for May 3rd, we should check out all this new stuff in the meantime. (Plus a handful of neat stuff that just clicks with the Dracula itch overall.)

So, in the interest of Dracula Season pregaming, let’s take a look at…

FICTION

Blood of My Blood – A recent addition to the Dracula Bad Ending AU pile, and definitely one of the most harrowing and addictive group-produced narratives I’ve ever come across, Blood of My Blood is the dramatically gothic currently-WIP work of @ibrithir-was-here and @animate-mush’s devious design. Give or take a heap of other fascinated folks (hello!) adding ideas to put more Horror into the Horrors that our cast has to face. The premise:

The Transylvanian climax went fatally sour and the Harkers were forced to shelter with Dracula himself, including their half-vampire son, Quincey. Cut to two decades later, and Quincey finds himself out in modern London, smitten with Lu, adopted daughter of Arthur and Jack, and diving into certain bloodstained old documents that detail the real history of how his parents came to live in the castle. Said revelations coming not a moment too soon, as a storm is coming for him straight from the Carpathians…

Dracula Daily Sketch Collection – An array of illustrations that captures every entry beat by beat, the Dracula Daily Sketch Collection by Georgia Cook, alias @georgiacooked was dished out over the course of the last Dracula Season. Some of the most fun character designs out there.

Fanfiction Spotlight: BlueCatWriter – With a whopping 99 works devoted to the novel Dracula (so far, the number may have gone up since I blinked), @bluecatwriter is one of the most prolific and talented fanfiction scribblers out there. Romances, nightmares, and overlaps between the two seem to crop up the most, give or take a crossover. Seems fitting that those blue paw prints have contributed to BoMB too.

The League of Extraordinary Gentlefolk – An ongoing comic in which all your favorite characters from the Classics section get together and tackle some perils ranging from the mundane to the monstrous. Started by the amazing @mayhemchicken and posted on @lxgentlefolkcomic, this series is a love letter to beloved Victorian era lit, with a spotlight on the two couples leading the League. Namely, the Harkers, ala Dracula, and the Nortons, ala Sherlock Holmes,’ “A Scandal in Bohemia.” Mina and Irene are the driving investigative and steering forces here, and still deeply in love with their likewise-infatuated husbands, just like in their canons! What a concept! Alan.

Without spoiling the full character list, just know there are going to be a ton of familiar faces roaming around before you finish reading the first arc. Said arc having conveniently wrapped up just a few days ago! Give the comic and its bonus silliness a look if you’re in the mood for a new comfort-adventure epic.

Re: Dracula – Probably the most well-known and incredible thing to come out of the initial Dracula Daily wave. This podcast is a full audio drama that follows the same format as the Substack, with episodes coming out in time with the entries themselves. And it has an unfairly cool soundtrack. They have a Tumblr with @re-dracula, a site and a Patreon to check out before the series kicks up again on May 3rd. (Also, keep an eye out for their next work, an audio drama in the same style with Carmilla.)

The Soldier and the Solicitor – Another treat from @ibrithir-was-here, this one involves a bit of time travel trouble. Quincey Harker has stumbled out of World War I and into the same dark forest where his father once fled for his life…then runs into the man himself, on that same night. Jonathan Harker, young and starved and lost, who has no choice but to trust this stranger while the Weird Sisters are at his heels…despite said stranger having no shadow. It’s a tasty emotional trek, already complete on Tumblr, but now it’s turning into a Webtoon. While Ibrithir is juggling a number of other stories, she’ll be redrawing spruced up versions of the comic and adding a few new scenes as things unfold.

Substack Stack – You know what’s better than one emailed-out public domain book club? A mountain of them. Just. So, so many of them. You’ll see that a lot of these are finished, but some are still ticking along. Either way, they’re all great picks if you’re craving some more old school lit to fill the void between undead emails.

Frankenstein Weekly – Frankenstein

Jekyll and Hyde Weekly – The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Voyage of the Nautilus – Twenty-Thousand Leagues Under the Sea

Letters from Watson – Sherlock Holmes

The Invisible Mail – The Invisible Man

Letters from Bunny – E.W. Hornung’s short stories of the eponymous Bunny and Raffles

Letters Regarding Jeeves - P. G. Wodehouse’s Bertie Wooster short stories, including the novel, Right Ho, Jeeves

…

……

………

…The Beetle Weekly – The Beetle (NOTE: Do Not Read This.)

The Vampyres – A novella I finally wrenched through the gears of self-publication as of March this year. Starring a petite but powerful paranormal cast, The Vampyres, centers on an unscrupulous undead fellow who finds that the revenants of the world are being mowed down by an entity known only as ‘Quinn Morse.’ Between trying to save his neck and figure out where the shadowy bastard came from, the Vampyre in question crosses paths with a new paramour and handy human shield in the form of a grieving Good Samaritan. He’s even polite enough to invite the Vampyre into his home while he’s in dire straits! Surely this will end well. All the info is available here and a little author site is over here.

What Manner of Man – This is the one made for everyone who started out hoping there’d be a real love story with our good friend Jonathan Harker and the Count when he was at his most charismatic. Where that sea of wonders dried up into a mire of horror, What Manner of Man by @stjohnstarling keeps things firmly on the romantic tracks. This Substack stars the letter-writing priest Father Victor E. Ardelian as he finds himself meeting with one enigmatic Lord Alistair Vane. It isn’t long before interest turns into intrigue and intrigue into undead intimacies.

The entire novel has been completed—along with multiple epilogues in the author’s Patreon, allowing readers to choose for themselves just how the uncanny romance plays out in the end—and the Substack now has a number of other gothic goodies piling up in the meantime.  

NONFICTION

Dracula Daily: A Unique Reading Experience: This one comes courtesy of @realwomenofgaming. It’s a short and sweet piece that amounts to a fun snapshot of the entire Dracula Daily ride. A cozy couple-minute read.

‘Dracula Daily’ is the One Substack You Need a Subscription To: Features my favorite Matt Kirkland interview. @mattkirkland, if you’re still floating around on here, thank you for dispatching our vampire newsletter again this year.

Dracula Daily is Tumblr’s hottest new book club: Alright, the ‘new’ part is worn out by now, but this one is still a delightful article to swing back around to. Two years on, this Polygon piece is a time capsule of those early months when people outside our bookworm bubble realized we were all happily receiving letters from our favorite classic gothic horror blorbos.  

“How Mina Murray Became Dracula’s Girlfriend” – Princess Weekes, if you ever read this, thank you, thank you, thank you. I am sending oceans of love and millions of rewatches to your video essay. If you haven’t seen it yet, “How Mina Murray Became Dracula’s Girlfriend” is one of the most refreshing and well-made breakdowns of both the title subject and numerous other issues that have proliferated in the public view of Dracula’s cast and plot as adaptations endlessly warp or outright bastardize the actual novel. An incredibly cathartic watch.  

Literary play gone viral: delight, intertextuality, and challenges to normative interpretations through the digital serialization of Dracula: A mouthful of a title for an even more elaborate article about the Dracula Daily phenomenon. This one is a full-on study that analyzes just what happened within the big bloodsucker book club surge and how its ‘wandering reading practices’ enriched the experience for participants.

 “The Undying Undead: An analysis of the Dracula Daily community for a theory of online community formation and interaction” – We have a thesis on here! Look at that! @sirangelothebestest’s MA thesis used our vampiric book club as the bones for a massive brick of an academic piece that definitely deserves a look.

…And I think I’ll go ahead and cap things here.

This isn’t everything I got recommended, but if I had squashed all of it in here, I think folks’ eyes would start to fall out of their head. I hope you can find something cool to comb through here. Or, if there’s something great I overlooked, tack it onto the list! We’ve got just two weeks to go until we’re off with Mr. Harker. Let’s enjoy our respite before those castle doors close behind us.

[sgiandubh]

@outlanderskin :"For those who have doubts: just research a little about Caitríona's dating history. See how she treated Dave and James and how she talked about them in interviews. See how she wrote about the Irish boyfriend she had in Paris in that article. Compare all of this to the impersonal way she treats or talks about Tony. Bingo🙃"

Good point 👌

Dear Good Point Anon,

You know, it's really serendipitous, as I have just finished a weeklong deep dive in very, very old press articles on (or at least mentioning) S and C, who clearly had a life before OL, thinking it would be nice to put some of my archive work skills to good service.

I think @outlanderskin was referring to C's New York Times article I reviewed and analyzed last summer, but I just found way better: a very long report in the Irish Independent's Sunday issue of July 11, 2004, focused on the next generation of Irish supermodels. Of which there could be only one, at that time: C, who dominates Roxanne Parker's 'Through Thick and Thin".

I am sorry, there is no link available to my knowledge, so we'll have to work with these very poor xerox scans:

I took the liberty of generously using my dreaded highlighter and, for the people who need to translate this post with Google, I am now taking my time to type what I find damn interesting in this almost twenty-year old article:

'If Ireland ever has a hope of having its own supermodel, then Caitriona Balfe is it. Sitting in the Pink Pony Café on Ludlow Street in New York, Caitriona swirls a wad of bread into her carrot and coriander soup while informing me that her musician boyfriend just brought her a breakfast-in-bed of cream eclairs and coffee a little over an hour ago. But that doesn't stop Caitriona from finishing her lunch and chasing it with a large cocoa-dusted cappuccino. Ebony-tressed and ivory-skinned, Caitriona clip-clops down the cobbled street after we leave the cafe, heading towards her apartment in Chinatown with Dave Mailone (sic!), the boyfriend, in tow.'

This reads, in 2024, like an interview with a more benevolent C clone from a totally different planet, indeed. A young, carefree, in love and hysterically funny C, who apparently had no problem heavily dishing out happy tidbits of her private life to her home country's press. A C also very much reminiscing anyone with a brain of the 2013-2018 bantering C, as this quote shows:

Again, you'll have to indulge me retyping it, Anon (tedious, I know - but helpful). She is remembering her real breakthrough, in November 2002, at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, in New York:

That was the most I've ever been paid for a show. I've got 18,000 euros for one day's work! They made me get a spray tan before the show, and I was still the whitest and the least well-endowed girl in the entire show! So what did she have to wear on the big day? `Not a whole lot! I think I described my outfit on the day as something Wilma Flintstone would wear on her honeymoon night. There wasn't a whole lot to it and it had bits of fur hanging off it.'

And, for good measure, we even have a (admittedly, awful) picture with the season's fiancé, with whom things did not end well:

I know, it looks like a Pravda pic, circa 1957 and I am honestly sorry. But it's still very clear. And, which is more important, very eloquent.

Anon and reader, you draw your own conclusions on this. I know where I stand. The only guy C has similar pics taken with and released in the press or on social media is the peasant some love to bash every single day in here. Their problem, not mine.

Yes, of course Mordor will yell and hiss. Of course they will throw rotten tomatoes at the blunt knife and scream THIS IS OLD. But hey, do you have any better than this poor (but oh, so endearingly authentic) picture or than any given S&C pic before the fucking EFH and IFH, when she gradually started to turn into today's Reclusive, Restrained and Rarefied Greta Garbo wannabe?

Oh, and please: don't give me the 'he's shy' or the paperwork crap again. Her public persona has drastically changed, and not for the better. It's plain to see and there are reasons for this.

Who's to blame? This question is so wrong, in so many ways.

The question should be 'what's to blame?'

I'll stop here, Anon and I hope it was somewhat useful. Thank you for dropping by.

[historicity-was-already-taken]

History Blog recs

One of my Very Specific interests over the last...idk 10 years, has been reading blogs about the A Song of Ice and Fire series, by historians. I'm not sure what it is about those books: the complex, multi-layered narrative, the author's claim to work creatively with real world history, the micro-arguments contained in every arc, or what, but historians have the most FASCINATING shit to say about those books.*

I've learned so much about the logistics of civilization, the intellectual history of leadership theory, the history of subsistence agriculture, the type of agriculture needed to sustain societies of a certain size, the evolution of military theory, etc from this very specific, Historians Engage With ASOIAF and its Television Adaptations genre of blog.

There is, of course, the late great Steven Attewell's @racefortheironthrone, but I recently discovered this gem: A Collection of Unmitigated Pedantry by Dr. Bret C. Devereaux. I just finished his series analyzing, problematizing, and ultimately debunking George RR Martin's claim that the Dothraki "were actually fashioned as an amalgam of a number of steppe and plains cultures… Mongols and Huns, certainly, but also Alans, Sioux, Cheyenne, and various other Amerindian tribes… seasoned with a dash of pure fantasy."

In Part IV, he writes:

... declaring that the Dothraki really do reflect the real world (I cannot stress that enough) cultures of the Plains Native Americans or Eurasian Steppe Nomads is not merely a lie, but it is an irresponsible lie that can do real harm to real people in the real world. And that irresponsible lie has been accepted by Martin’s fans; he has done a grave disservice to his own fans by lying to them in this way. And of course the worst of it is that the lie – backed by the vast apparatus that is HBO prestige television – will have more reach and more enduring influence than this or any number of historical ‘debunking’ essays. It will befuddle the valiant efforts of teachers in their classrooms (and yes, I frequently encounter students hindered by bad pop-pseudo-history they believe to be true; it is often devilishly hard to get students to leave those preconceptions behind), it will plague efforts to educate the public about these cultures of their histories. And it will probably, in the long run, hurt the real descendants of nomads.

Which just. I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT. Y'all know how deeply concerned I am a. with the outsize influence the entertainment industry has on memory; and b. how little that industry gives a shit about responsible use of its own power. So like, this is my shit. I'm still exploring this blog and it is a TREASURE TROVE.

*I do not include myself in that grouping. My thoughts are like: BUT WHICH ONES ARE THE JEWS DANY IS MY UNPROBLEMATIC QWEEN/AZOR AHAI/PRINCE THAT WAS PROMISED/STALLION THAT'S GONNA MOUNT THE WORLD/ETC I CAN'T WAIT TIL SANSA SHOWS HERSELF IS DANY GONNA BURN IT ALL DOWN AND EMERGE FROM THE FLAMES LIKE THAT ELMO GIF IS ARYA GOING TO RIDE A WOLF WOW I DON'T CARE ABOUT BRAN I THINK THE RHOYNAR ARE THE JEWS WHERE IS THE GODDAMN FUCKING WINDS OF WINTER

**Also, I never watched more than 2 episodes of the show. I hated how it added in sexual violence and nudity for no reason when there was already PLENTY of that in the text, most of it with narrative purpose. But then I read the books because it was 2012 and I wanted to keep up with pop culture.

[lady-of-the-silver-lakeatron]

Bridgerton Season 3 Episode 1 Initial Reactions

I didn't get to post these reactions so I'm posting them late as I needed time to edit all my 3am typos (cry) from Thursday.

Bless Francesca for being the funniest lowkey Bridgerton with that piano playing scene.

I swear I paused the Colin glow up reveal scene to analyze everyone's reaction. My top choices are Anthony and Kate and Bennedict.

ABC reunion + Gregory being adorable. I love when they show the sibling interactions.

Backs up, did I just see ASL from a debutant! That is so cool!

Queen Charlotte is having none of these people lmfao

Not Eloise getting dragged by Colin by her fashion choices (peak brother-sister vibes)

Stop- Francesca: “y'all are chaotic yappers the lord cannot present me a harder challenge”

Featherington's! I almost forgot both of Pen's sisters were married here! I keep remembering the book (romancing Mr. Bridgerton) and that the show has arranged things differently.

Prudence's man (I cannot/ do not remember his name) is giving such strong Kenergy.

Would it be the Featherington household without financial drama?

Eloise - Pen meet up, omg the heart break in their eyes!!

Cressida, when I get you!! It has been 0.5 seconds since this girl got to this garden party and she's already bullying Pen. Girl breathe.

Cressida-Eloise is intriguing as a dynamic I’m afraid. Also, Pen’s sad little face (cry)

I'm a bit confused with Francesca's interest in the marriage mart right now as she seems to prefer being around small groups of people and does not have much interest in being around guys. It feels as if this is a chore she must fulfil.

Kate -Violet solidarity is so cute to see after the angst of last season

Lady Danbury in the white ensemble with the top hat is looking magnificent I want her to poke someone with her cane!!

I'm liking the make up on Kate much more this season??? She seems a lot more glowy and rosy, maybe it's the lighting or something but her make up looks different.

I'm so sorry but Colin getting all this attention after having a literal hot girl summer is vv funny. Like he's in his early 20s lmao, but he is not giving confidence he is giving slightly awkward line reading with no chemistry. In the books him being more rakish was believable because it was set 10 years later.

Colin meeting and talking to Pen, side eye my boy. I'm loving the costuming choices to visibly show they are both uncomfortable/ do not fit their clothes well and it’s so starkly done. Poor Pen in this yellow dress makes her look a lot more juvenile (which isn't bad but it is unflattering). And Colin with what I am assuming are Anthony hand me downs since that jacket looks frumpy. The parallels!

Omg "Go home and get to work" Mrs.Featherington is so unserious

One sentence horror story "I take comfort in knowing you will always be there to take care of me". Get out miss Penelope runnn

Colin had one slutty slutty summer and the fact they keep trying to frame it as mostly intellectual is sending me.

Eloise reading Jane Austen! Is this character development?

Every scene so far where Pen and Eloise see each other gives the vibe of two exes meeting after the most devastating break up, I appreciate this framing so much because losing your childhood girl best friend is one of the most painful types of breakups.

ABC hang out?? Bennedict responsibility arc?

"She is colder now I am afraid" is a wild way to say someone is dead.

NEWTON!! BABY!! KANTHONY! IN! BED! BEING ROMANTIC!!

Damn! We're getting steamy af scenes already in the first episode! Anthony needing to go down on his wife to start off the day is certainly something I can get behind.

OOh this outfit reveal! Yessssss bb Pen eat them up! Penelope having a *debut* moment.

Aww the Featherinton spouses are sweet.

I see you Colin with that side eye

Omg Penelope being a bombshell and being socially awkward is so cute. You’ll figure it out soon bb don’t give up, they’re just jelous!

Ooh these girls are not liking Eloise they're sus

I'm a little uninterested in the queen charlotte diamond drama atm

Francesca: Live Laugh Love the piano forte

These guys are being so rude to Fran like let the poor girl speak! You’re traumatizing her.

Kanthony dancing and Kate's dress to reference the Bridgerton blue?? Oh the costume department has served.

Aww walflower solidarity with Francesca and Penelope. They're both the more reserved of their family, it's sweet moment between the two and the encouragement!

I know we won't love lord Debling but he's looking so sweetly at Pen and being so welcoming compared to everyone else.

CRESSIDA they can never make me like you, you little brat.

Yes, Pen eat him up give it to him tell him!!! "You miss me but you would never court me". GET HIS ASSS!!

 I fear our girl will be writing some scathing lady Whistledown.

This man threatening the Featheringtons is a gremlin, and I am getting bad vibes.

This conversation about the pitting of women against each other is valid social commentary but I cannot focus on it as it appears Cressida has murdered a flock of flamingoes to make her outfit.

Self-awareness, Cressida, does not free you from your crimes!

Kanthony is serving this episode. I appreciate this blissfully married life on them! Also Kate’s outfits are so intricate and beautiful. She has come so far.

Francesca so far feels like an external character, and it was similar in the novels until we got to her book. I really hope we get more context for her outlook soon.

Colin, what are YOU doing here. The way that Luke N is serving this season, whew. I really can buy his clueless innocence at his friendship with Pen, but finally the plot is plotting!

I'm very confused by this Baron Kent plot line and its introduction in the first episode.

OOH the drama for Colin's Whistledown dress down.

She really said he ain't shit, it's a facade, a ruse, he's a sad little attention whore

Colin: FUCK lady whistle down all my homies hate lady whistle down.

I'll keep it short. It was simply exhilarating. I love being back it's like slipping into a comfy worn hoodie. It's good to be back!

[misc-obeyme]

lesson 40 had me all over the place when it came out😭 I got the first snippet on my lunch break, was practically vibrating the last two hours of my shift because i wanted to get home and PLAY

And I was keeping up on twitter from following someone who posts snippets of the lesson and I saw the hard mode part, and I was like "ohmygod is MC dreaming? Did the spell not work? Was our magic not enough?" (because i was slightly disappointed lol)

BECAUSE THAT WAS MY FIRST IDEA BEFORE LESSON 40 RELEASED, summoning the white dragon was meant to be practice, but I was afraid it'd drain all our power and we'd end up stuck in the past (and maybe have to make pacts with more demons?)

but then I was thinking during work "oh god what if the spell failed and MC passed out and that's why everyone is so calm, it's a dream" because I didn't have the full context. But MC definitely left the past as far as we can tell (to where? Who knows)

I'm stuck on that idea that hard mode might be a dream. Maybe the spell drained MC and Solomon, BECAUSE WHERE IS HE, HE TRAVELED BACK WITH MC SO THEY SHOULD'VE BEEN TOGETHER?? MAYBE?? Maybe they both returned to the present and are unconscious in the entrance of the HoL. I'm anxious and excited for season three

- ✨

Okay. Okay okay okay. I've been thinking a lot about all of this, too, and I have to say I think all of us are freaking out but it might not be what it seems.

Because this game is notorious for being stupidly vague and at this point, anything could happen.

At the very end, before they do the cast credits, we simply say something like "I'll be back!" before disappearing into the sky. And actually all that really happens is a couple of the bros nod and smile at us before the screen goes white. What does that mean? Did we disappear? Did we make it through the gate? Did Solomon come back with us? None of this is clear from that brief moment.

The hard lesson, then, is confirming that we made it back to somewhere. It doesn't actually say we made it back to the past or even back to the correct timeline. We just show up in the HoL, by ourselves because I don't think Solomon is with us, and the bros are all like oh hey there you are.

BUT. In true weirdo timeline fashion, they have a feeling that they haven't seen us in a while. And Solomon had said previously that the past and the future sort of impact each other.

Time is a soup. Or mud. I think they're trying to tell us that the timelines have been merged all along. Each instance of the boys that we encounter have echoes of the boys we've met before. They get feelings about things related to us, such as the guest room.

Could we have drained all our magic summoning the dragon? Quite possibly! And maybe we did get through the portal, but due to the lack of magic power we only made it partway and ended up in a totally different timeline.

Maybe we did successfully get through the portal as we needed to, but because time is soupy, we ended up in an altered version of the time we left.

I went back and re-read what Solomon told us when we first got to Cocytus Hall. He says

We all kind of assumed that the brothers also experienced our disappearance. Certainly it probably took Solomon some time to analyze the traces of magic left behind, as he stated. But the only being aside from Solomon himself that we can say for certain was aware that something was happening is Barbatos. Solomon never says that he told the brothers or that the brothers were involved at all.

That being said, it seems unlikely to me that the bros and everybody else wouldn't have noticed if MC just up and disappeared.

I think there are a handful of possibilities at this point.

We've been transported to a time just before we disappeared or shortly after, so the brothers are unaware that anything even happened.

We've been transported to a completely different timeline.

Solomon and Barbatos are somehow in cahoots with Nightbringer and none of this actually means anything.

Due to the soup like quality of time, we are in fact back where we left, but the brothers' understanding of our absence was somehow altered, even if they are still aware that something is off.

Something else entirely different and out of left field because this game is whack and comes up with nonsense all the time.

The details of these scenarios are completely up in the air. Lacking magic, magic gone wrong, Solomon not coming with us for some reason, Nightbringer finally getting involved again, maybe even Michael since we all thought something interesting was gonna go down with him... I mean, the possibilities are endless.

But as of right now, we really don't have a lot of information about where MC has ended up. And while this game has been consistent only in letting me down or making me freak the fuck out, I'm still interested to see where they go next. I'm giving them a chance to bring us a beginning to season three that doesn't leave me going ???? and instead gives me some !!!! Maybe that's a silly thing to do, but I am generally a perpetual optimist out of spite.

And you know, if I really hate it all, I can just go back to writing OC content in an OG timeline where I know what's happening. :)

OOF sorry to rant on your ask, ✨ anon! But honestly, I think any of your ideas could be right. It could be that MC used up all their magic, it could be that the hard mode is a dream, it could be that we lost Solomon along the way somewhere, all kinds of things are possible!

If we're unconscious, though, we better wake up in our tree filled guest room. Solomon can be there, too, I wouldn't mind that at all. Cuties waking up together in MC's bed like ?? what happened?? Oh hey, but you're here with me, so it must be okay. Oops getting into fluffy Solomon nonsense again...

[toongrrl-blog]

Pink Power Rankings, Pt. 3

You’ve (hopefully for me) waited, now you have it. The next chapter of Pink Power Rankings! I had a good time doing Parts One and Two and have been wanting to do Part Three for some time and I needed to look for more pop culture sources involving the color pink. Here I look at moments in TV and Film featuring women and girls (and other feminine presenting folks) moments in the color pink and I analyze if this is a case of pink representing feminine power or vulnerability under a Patriarchal structure.

Spoilers Ahead

Pictured above are the many versions of the Pink Ranger from the Power Rangers series.

Mei Lee

We are gonna take a trip into Chinese Culture, early 2000s fashion, adolescence, and the push and pull between family traditions and honoring your own spirit. Buckle up.

First Red: Mei Mei lives in a multitude of cultures. First she is a Millennial who likes boy bands and soda pop who tries to be a straight A student and proper daughter to her (likely) Boomer elders, she is a Chinese Canadian girl who wakes up find herself as a giant fluffy red panda. Chinese Flag, Chinese Culture, Canadian flag, red pandas, anger, passion, menstruation: what do they have in common? The color red. In Chinese culture, red (along with the complementary yet opposite on the color spectrum, green) is a lucky color; it’s a festive color, the color of beauty, good fortune, vitality, and happiness. Mei is an adorable girl who has a bright future ahead of her and she is a energetic, go-getter who hardly lets things get her down. According to Ericksen Translations, Red in the Western World evokes excitement, love, danger, passion, and anger, Indian cultures consider red to be the color of purity, Latin America can pair red with white for religious connotations, and red is infamously used by totalitarian regimes. That last part is important because Mei Mei is butting heads with her green (another lucky color in Chinese culture, unless you are a man wearing a hat) and blue (the color of sadness and motherhood in Western culture) clad mother, who lacked the community of good friends with different perspectives (or any) and was so bound up in duty and guilt/intergenerational trauma to see that her daughter needs to join in the pursuits of her age group. 

This even shows up in how Mei was dressed (and as a testament to the film, showcases the changing seasons in Toronto, coinciding with the themes regarding puberty): she starts the film wearing a red cardigan sweater, a flared skirt, leggings, sneakers, still a hip little girl but cardigans (along with collared shirts) evoke “Classic Fashion”, they evoke an image of British aristocratic women, 1950s housewives and secretaries, D.C. Office Ladies, they transcend time and are safe. TL;DR, they are “Good Girl” clothes, the kind of clothes that don’t make waves (sartorially nor with the status quo). 

On the other hand, polo shirts (especially if they were layered), were the it shirt for the 2000s. After Clueless hit theaters in 1995, there was a resurgence in preppy styles, especially for young women, with palettes becoming brighter and brighter. And when we see Mei Mei at the end of the film: we find her in a light pink polo shirt with the latest in Y2K accessories (spot the hair clips, earrings, and choker), showing that she has embraced her own voice and panda and living openly. It’s a good thing her outlook is so bright, she is gonna be one of  many Millennials likely affected by the 2008 Recession and the now current COVID-19 pandemic.

Power Ranking: A 10, 24/7, 365!

Monica Lewinsky 

Here we will focus on dissecting the serialized interpretation of Monica Lewinsky (as played by exquisite Beanie Feldstein) rather than the real person I simp over; Monica, in real life and in the series based on events in her 20s, is an utterly femme-y woman but pink is not a power color within the series. We see her wear it in loungewear, chatting on the phone with her treacherous friend (the never can be too maligned) Linda Tripp (Sarah Paulson in one of her problematic roles) or in a sleepover scene or as a robe or in a romantic nightie and here, in a scene where she has a tumultuous argument with President Bill Clinton (Clive Owen looking a tad svelte) where they finally break up. One can surmise that Pink is the color of vulnerability for Monica, as it makes her small and easy to take advantage of by an older colleague and lover. 

In short: it’s the color of both femininity and vulnerability and we see Linda and First Lady Hillary Clinton wear it themselves in subdued and pastel versions, nodding to their age. But onto Monica and how she could (or could not) fall into the same subued pastels as these women who are contemporaries of her own more youthful and glamorous mother (played by the uber-talented Mira Sorvino); pink for Monica symbolizes her femininity (which she was lampooned for as a bimbo and valley girl), her warmth (a quality that people are surprised to learn she has once meeting her), her beauty (her blessing and a curse, as she diets like crazy), her sexuality (despite the Sexual Revolution, society is still slut-shamey and hasn’t reformed enough for abuse of power to become a thing of the past), and her romantic nature and sadly due to Bill being the ultimate fuck-boy of the late-20th Century, is likely to become the embittered nag (Hillary) or hag (Linda) that is vilified in the media, or rather her ultimate fate as punching bag and sex object. 

Monica was in soft pastels for her loungewear outfits but this sweater is a bold, saturated coral pink that matches her emotions. After screaming at secretary Betty Currie (the one and only Rae Dawn Chong), which bad move Monica, she gets Bill to lament how horrible she is (really the whole thing is his damn fault), projecting and using Betty’s history of being a Black woman under Jim Crow to manipulate Monica “a fucking 24 year old” and how he thought she was “a good girl” which earns him a hearty “fuck you!” from her and they decide to break off, her even turning down his pleas to resume after his term is over, but he resolves to help her get the job she wants and she quits the Pentagon for the greener pastures (or rather the lipstick) of Revlon where her intelligence and beauty savvy will be put to work. 

Oh girly, you aren’t out of the woods. On a simp-y note: I want to note what costume designer Meredith Markworth-Pollack described Monica as an “innately a sexual woman, she’s flirtatious, she’s sensual, she’s curvy, she’s magnetic”...basically Monica has the same energy as Joan Holloway of Mad Men, another mistreated and sexualized woman who was a victim of her time and place and underestimated as a person and intellect due to her gender. But both women, as Tom and Lorenzo once said: “She took charge of her life and owned her mistakes” when comparing Joan to Liz Taylor (a vivacious dark-haired bombshell who was noted for her sensuality and mocked for her weight) and became producer. *chef’s kiss*

Power Ranking: 5.5 (like a phoenix she will rise out of the ashes).

Eleanor Wong

I love this look, it’s giving Grace Kelly meets Betty Draper Francis’s hidden Italian haute couture side. The chic updo, the jewelry, bejeweled bodice, cinched waistline, full pink tulle skirt, and the long gloves all scream “Mid Century Movie Glamour”. Eleanor showed up with her friend Devi to the Winter Dance stag to support friend Fabiola and her girlfriend Eve’s bid for Winter Dance Royalty. The girls also lament their love life, having broken up with boys before. But Luck be a Lady tonight, for these two ladies in fabulous formal wear. Devi gets to go with her older and popular boyfriend Paxton while Eleanor gets the attentions of Paxton’s dopey friend (they are so cute a couple) and gets to tell Ben, Devi’s entitled ex who always called Devi “David” and competed with her and called the girls the racist, misogynistic moniker of “Unfuckable Nerds” or UN (as Harriyanna Hook once said: “No boy alive who called me ugly was ever hotter than me”). Eleanor gets to tell a heartbroken Ben that Devi did care for him but she and Fabi told him he wasn’t good enough and gave a dismissive apology granted he ends up with Devi but Fab and Eleanor show that if wants her, he gonna have to prove himself.

Good. For. Her.

Power Ranking: 11. 

Joyce Prigger

She emerges in a dusty rose suit and a floral blouse with grey-blue and orchid shades, youthful and ready to make an impression. Perhaps while wearing the colors of the gender binary and of power as defined by a patriarchal culture built on hierarchy. Sadly, this ambitious revolutionary has to kiss corporate ass and is failing. “The Matriarchy Awakens” is a clever tagline, but not a magazine title but there is a need for a matriarchy in an era when men can feel free to comment on other women’s bodies and their presentation with little to no consequence, where women are encouraged to diet but them exercising reproductive choice is taboo, where women are gaslighted into being silent about their concerns or wants. So young, Seven Sisters educated Joyce Prigger goes to a magazine convention to shop around her ideas for a feminist magazine that is sadly drier than the Southern California climate after being harassed by construction workers and to tone-deaf corporate heads who still like the idea of women building their whole lives and self-esteem around them. 

So another man suggests he can sell her magazine with a crispier, tender title for his pornography publishing business: Minx. She is reluctant (she hasn’t made it to sex positive feminism yet) and walks off the convention getting harassed by the same construction worker and telling him to fuck off.

It’s a start, but articles about marital rape are gonna need pics of hot men in the buff.

Power Ranking: 6.

Kamala Nandiawanda

About four decades later and we meet another young woman who is coping with tone-deaf males in a profession she has ambition for, with the added weight of being a non-European woman in a White Supremacist Patriarchy. Kamala does what her aunt (and what nameless women in male-dominated circles) have done, keep her head down and smile while doing work that she is not getting credit for. And submit to their little games where they make her their video game damsel in distress and have her dress up according to their desires. 

At some point she goes to her teenage cousin for help and her teenage cousin Devi (a known hothead) tells her she doesn’t has to take anyone’s shit and that men like her colleagues like seeing Asian Women as submissive and easy to abuse. Kamala eventually threatens her mentor with a lawsuit and going to feminist minded groups and reporting him. 

Power Ranking: 5 (this was one of many straws that broke the camel’s back).

Julia Child

In the HBO Max unofficial sequel to Julie and Julia, a film that partially focused on the beginning of Julia Child’s career as the co-author of a popular cookbook that demystified French cooking to ordinary Americans, we meet Julia Child enjoying her new life in Massachusetts and on the heels of the popularity of Mastering the Art of French Cooking as she works on the 2nd addition. As a promotion on public television, she spontaneously fixes an omelette on air in her folksy and comedic style and is offered the opportunity to host her own cooking show. Not a TV owner (much less viewer), she is somewhat skeptical but becomes increasingly enthused and considers hosting her own show despite the skepticism of a few.

Power Ranking: 10, bon appetit!

Robin Buckley

Here is Robin Buckley: in frills she is not accustomed to nor her preference (foisted on her by the more miniscule Nancy Wheeler) with the highly femme outfits constricting her, especially around her neck. Nancy gives the awkward (honestly likely neurodivergent) Robin a script to follow as they try to glean information from a mental institution about one of their patients. Robin, when the interview goes nowhere, Robin goes off script and talks about how no one takes girls seriously and gets them access to their patient.

Power Ranking: 9.5

Suga Mama

“When I’m an old woman, I shall wear purple, with a red hat that doesn’t quite go...”, welp Suga Mama doesn’t need to dress so garish and formal to command attention as a woman over 50. Ever since The Proud Family premiered in 2001, Suga Mama was a hip granny and a force to be reckoned, no one not even her son, held her back. 

Power Ranking: 10

Heather Chandler

ModernGurlz sussed out Heather so well, so I like to look at the film a bit from her point of view from when she was alive.

Picture it: Ohio 1989. You are the Queen Bee of your high school with three loyal underlings who do your bidding, even humiliating the school fat girl. You act like you are better than everyone else but you deep down feel insecure, nothing impresses you, the boys are either bores or objectify you, so you hit a college party hoping to find a mature option. Big Mistake, as he coerces you into oral sex while you are really wanting to go back to the party. You then stare at your reflection in self-hatred and then the next morning you wake up in a hangover and your friend, who you feel screwed you over for fighting back with her own college hook-up is with the school weirdo. You drink their hangover cure and it’s disgusting and what?

You have entered the afterlife and it’s so boring.

Power Ranking: 0

Louise Belcher

The #girlboss of the Belcher Clan, her late grandmother’s granddaughter, the one who solved a murder and saved everyone from an explosion involving flammable teddy bears in a slow-moving ride. Owner of her grandmother’s pink cap turned bunny hat.

Power Ranking: 10

Lisa Simpson

The long-running The Simpsons is a subversive take on classic family sitcom tropes and American Traditionalist “family values”, where the straight A and principled Lisa Simpson is often clad in a light pink and puff-sleeved dress with a classic party dress design. American Christian Tradition and Values writ in fabric: but Lisa subverts these values by staying true to her moral compass and often that means pissing off the social order. 

In this case it’s clearing her brother Bart’s name after he was framed as a thief during collection, the truth is he fell for the sweet looking and pretty preacher’s daughter’s manipulations who tells him no one will believe him because Springfield is classist and elitist like many small-towns (there I said it). Lisa takes the pulpit to urge people to confess their sins, no takers from Jessica Lovejoy so Lisa points her out and the town sees that Jessica kept several weeks of collection money under her bed, a cry for help to her parents who care more about looking right than being good parents.

Power Ranking: 11

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 3.2 Transcript: Fumbling He/She/They David Tennant

[Garageband Good Omens theme song plays]

C: Hello! My name is Crystal.

G: And my name is Grey.

C: And this is Rubbish and Probably a Podcast, a Good Omens commentary podcast where I, someone who has seen this show too many times…

G: And I, someone who only knows this show through Crystal, discuss every single episode of Good Omens. 

C: For today’s episode, we are discussing the second half of Season 1, Episode 3: “Hard Times.”

G: "Hard Times!" So last week, we discussed-

C: Four days ago or whatever, yeah.

G: Yeah, I guess so. We discussed the cold open, I guess is what you would call it, [C laughs] of Season 1, Episode 3. Now we shall discuss the plot, the present day, one day to the end of the world.

C: I mean, we open with- Basically, what happens is like, we had the cold open for half an hour, we have the title sequence, and then time like, rushes forward. Like, we get like, very rapid shots of like, everything that's happened up until the end of Episode 2, where Aziraphale goes like, "Sorry! Right number." I thank that that's sort of implies that all of that flashback was to sort of explain Aziraphale’s actions upon meeting the- like, knowing the address of the Antichrist, right?

G: I guess so.

C: Like, that is sort of the way that it's being framed to me. And I don't know if I got the takeaways that explain why Aziraphale's doing what he's doing, but like, it's an interesting concept. That all that was just to give context. Or maybe it's not even about explanation. Maybe it's like, "They have all this history, and Aziraphale still won't tell Crowley that he knows where Adam is." Like, it could go many different ways, but it sure does feel like that sometimes.

Before we go back to the scene, there's like, a shot of the outside of Aziraphale’s bookshop where we can finally read clearly the sign in the window. And I would like to read that out loud.

G: [laughs] Okay.

C: It says:

"Book Shop Opening Hours

"I open the shop on most weekdays about 9:30 or perhaps 10am. While occasionally I open the shop as early as 8, I have been known not to open until 1, except on Tuesday I tend to close about... 5:50pm? or earlier if something needs tending to. However, I might occasionally keep the shop open until 8 or 9 at night, you never know when you might need some night reading. On days that I am not in, the shop will remain closed. On weekends, I will open the shop during normal hours unless I am elsewhere. Bank Mondays will be treated in the usual fashion, with early closing on Wednesdays, or sometimes Fridays. (For Sundays see Tuesdays).

"A. Z. Fell, bookseller."

[G laughs] He does not want anyone to come in ever. God bless.

G: Literally, the thing about the 9 to 5 opening hours is that it's so anti-working class, but, you know what? A. Z. Fell, purveyor of books for the gentry, is anti-everyone. [laughing]

C: Exactly.

G: So it's okay. He's anti-working class or any class whatsoever.

C: Inside the shop, he's like, trying to figure out- why isn't any of this scene in the podcast guide, by the way?

G: I'm so sorry. I thought it was short, so I deleted it. [laughing]

C: Everything matters to me so much. Also, this is important! Like, this is like, all we get of his mindset before the bandstand, basically, right? Like, we need to analyze this shit.

G: We get- we get a lot from the Heaven scene.

C: Yes, sure fine. Whatever. Okay. So he knows where the Antichrist is now, right? And he decides that he should probably tell Heaven. Now, in the book we get a passage before this where it goes:

“He ought to tell Crowley.

“No, he didn't. He wanted to tell Crowley. He ought to tell Heaven. He was an angel, after all. You had to do the right thing. It was built-in. You see a wile, you thwart. Crowley had put his finger on it, right enough. He ought to have told Heaven right from the start."

And then, following that, it says:

“But he'd known him for thousands of years. They got along. They nearly understood one another.” "They nearly understood one another" - What a line! - “He sometimes suspected they had far more in common with one another than with their respective superiors. They both liked the world, for one thing, rather than viewing it simply as the board on which the cosmic game of chess was being played.

“Well, of course, that was it. That was the answer, staring him in the face. It'd be true to the spirit of his pact with Crowley if he tipped Heaven the wink, and then they could quietly do something about the child, although nothing too bad of course because we were all God's creatures when you got down to it, even people like Crowley and the Antichrist, and the world would be saved and there wouldn't have to be all that Armageddon business, which would do nobody any good anyway, because everyone knew Heaven would win in the end, and Crowley would be bound to understand.

“Yes. And then everything would be all right.”

God! He's such a silly, goofy guy, but like, I wish that we got more of this in the episode. Like, the idea that, like, that telling Heaven is true to the spirit of like, his pact with Crowley is such an interesting way for him to have spun it. 'Cause it's like, "Okay, I believe Heaven's gonna stop it. I can't tell Crowley, because technically, he's the enemy. But like, this is doing what Crowley would have done. This is like, doing the right thing to prevent the world from being ended."

G: It reminds me so much of what you said, I think in Episode 1 where Aziraphale does things and then, like, justifies those actions to himself to come to the conclusion that they're good. And this one has that vibe of like, him being like, "Oh, but surely it's the right thing to do," blah blah blah. And it's like, aw. You little guy.

C: Yeah. Though, I mean, I think he he does believe it.

G: Of course.

C: Like, he's good at deluding himself. And also, especially in the book, he doesn't have as much contact with Heaven, so he doesn't really know how much they suck as as much as show Aziraphale does, so like, I don't think that his conclusion is that unreasonable. Like, he absolutely should have told Crowley, but like, I get why he did what he did in the book. Why he did what he did in the show, less so!

G: Does the bandstand scene happen in the book?

C: No.

G: Ooh! Then all the- What's all this then? [both laugh]

C: Yeah. What is all this then? [screams] I mean, yeah, Neil Gaiman just said his fucking thing about how like, when he was writing, he was adapting it for TV, he just found that structuring it like a love story helped like, fill it out better and make more sense. God. Literally- like, finally giving into like, 30 years of your fans saying that this is the love story of all time just because you were like, "Well, it made it easier to write." Of course it would make it easier to write because they are in love, and you were stopping that from coming out on the page.

I mean, he also sort of character slanders both of them in the process of making them in love. But, you know, as I stated in our previous episode, I'm taking a new, mature approach where I just view them as completely separate characters.

So Aziraphale’s like, practising how he's gonna tell Heaven about all this. I mean, he's just being a silly goofy guy, honestly. In his practice, he tells them where Adam is, and he says, "I have his address, so we just have to... eliminate him now," and he does little, like, [laughing] punches on "eliminate" to demonstrate. And then he goes, "Then everything could still be okay." which I also really like as just a character moment of like, he views the world in its current state as like, good and fine, which, like, in Good Omens 'verse, it kind of is. And then, like, the point is like, to return to the status quo. And, like, "Everything can still be okay," is like, such a shaky place to be as well, but like, it's what he knows. Like, he can't even imagine like, a better world than this one.

He mentions the hellhound, which is where the scene cuts to the hound itself. And what God Narrator says is that the hellhound is experiencing different things than he thought he would during the last days. And God says, "Form shapes nature. There are certain ways of behavior appropriate to small dogs, which are, in fact, welded into the genes." And then she goes on to talk about like, him, trying to scare the cat and it not working. And I think this idea of form shapes nature is very interesting to me when you apply it to-

G: To Adam, yeah.

C: - Aziraphale and Crowley. [G laughing] And oh, to Adam too, sure. Yeah. I guess that guy's also there. [both laughing]

G: [laughing] I remember when Crystal was fucking making the cover photo for Episode 2,  and they were like, "Ugh, I guess there's other characters in Good Omens as well." [laughs] That's literally what's happening right now.

C: Yeah, I think specifically, I was like, "I just made a stupid boring picture of the Them walking out of the ice cream shop because I feel like sometimes we have to acknowledge that there's other people there, too." [G laughs] And there are, and in the book I would say that I like more of the characters in a more even way, but in the show, they just clearly have made it the Crowley and Aziraphale show.

G: I've heard somebody say in the Good Omens books, Crowley and Aziraphale are just part of the story, as opposed to the TV show, where they are the story.

C: Okay, fine. We can talk about it in terms of Adam. It is interesting, like, you know, he's in the body of a young boy.

G: Like, even the evils that he does are based on-

C: Young boy evils right now, yeah. Back to talking about Aziraphale and Crowley [laughs], I mean, they're in human bodies. They've been in human bodies for 6000 years. They've had the same ones the whole time, because they've never been discorporated before, and like-

G: Is that true? They say that?

C: I think it's definitely heavily impl- At least I think it's heavily implied that Aziraphale’s never been discouraged before in a later scene. But, right, and they're like, the only angel and demon that I feel like have been stationed on Earth for this long and have been in their bodies for this long. I wonder if that has shaped nature. Because, like, there are a lot of times when they're in situations where, like, they could have miracled themselves out, but like, they don't. And like, whenever someone on fucking Tumblr asks fucking Neil Gaiman on fucking Tumblr about it, he always says something like, “Oh, well, they've just been on Earth for so long that they like, sometimes forget that they can do things in like, not the human way,” which I think is sweet.

G: Wow! A rare Neil Gaiman W.

C: [laughs] I mean, I think he is just covering up his plot holes with things that he knows the Tumblrinas will go crazy for. And you know what? It’s working. So that's about habits. But I also wonder if their bodies also shape what they recall themselves as being capable of or are comfortable doing.

So Adam walks by Jasmine Cottage, and he overhears Anathema being really upset about having lost the book. Like, she is picking up pots and smashing them against a bench, and like, yelling, like, "I can't believe it! 350 years, my family kept it safe. 350 years!" and she's crying and yeah. Sorry, girl.

G: Can I say something about Anathema's fashion sense?

C: Yeah.

G: And it's that we saw her as a child. Like, we saw her mom. We saw their house. They didn't dress or like, live in a house of this aesthetic. [C laughs] Which means that she like, chose this. She was like, "Well, I'm an occultist," as she puts it. "Well, I'm an occultist! I'm going to commit to the bit so hard." And she did. I love that.

C: And I love it. She looks great.

G: She does look great. Like, especially like, the dress and the boots combo later on when she's on the street. It's really wonderful.

C: Yeah. Yeah. All of her clothes are like, sort of like. like- she's got like, velvety dresses or like, blouses with skirts that like, have a lot of ruffles, and like, puffed sleeves. And her hair is like, always like, down, but like, part of it's up in a bun. Like, it's great. She looks amazing at all times.

G: And she has those beautiful big glasses.

C: Yeah. Very nice. Good for her.

G: Very nice!

C: Adam comes over to check in on her because he's a nice boy, and she tells him what was up. They have an exchange where he's like, a Charming Young Man in like, title case, in a way that like, verged on annoying for me. Like, his line about how like, "Oh, like, I wrote a book, and it was about a pirate who was a famous detective, and there was part of it in a spaceship where a dinosaur comes out and fights with the cowboys," like, it's too much, Neil Gaiman. It's too much. Like, you can't just cram every single “boy activity” you can think of [G laughs] into two sentences to just be like, "Here is a child. Isn't it funny that he's a child? Look! Cowboys, and detectives, and dinosaurs." Like, when I was 11, I kept my writings a lot more thematically tight than that.

Whatever. Adam can do whatever he wants

They introduce themselves to each other properly. She's, you know, upset about how some men in a car came and stole her book but didn't actually mean to steal her book. And Adam says, when asked if he lives here, he says, "This is my world, from Hogback Wood to the dip, and from the old quarry up to the pond." Which is, I think, is nice. I feel like they do a good job balancing like, Adam uncanny moments with like, Adam normal guy moments. They like, have a silly little misunderstanding about like, "Oh, you're like, in the yard of the cottage owned by the witch?" and she's like, "No, I live here," and he says, [laughing] "Look, excuse me for asking if it's not a personal question. But are you a witch?" And she like, goes like, "No! I'm an occultist." Yeah. they're both having a silly funny time. When they go inside, Dog is commanded by Adam to go inside, but there's a horseshoe over the door that's supposed to prevent like, demons and shit from going in, and Dog eventually acquiesces, which God says means that a little bit more of Hell burns away in the hellhound.

-

G: We are now in Shadwell's place, and Newton is there. He's looking around and sees a bunch of witch torture devices, and also Adultery Pulsifer's hat. Fun! I guess. He brings out a ledger of quote-unquote "members" of Shadwell’s Witchfinder Army. At first, the names in the ledger are completely normal names, like "Commander Williams" or whatever whatever, and as the list goes on it becomes more and more ridiculous. Like, Witchfinder Sergeant Milk Bottle, or like, Table or whatever. 'Cause it's all fake, and it's all fabricated, and Shadwell just invented all this crap. So we go to Shadwell, where Shadwell actually is, and it's in a restaurant where Crowley is meeting with him.

C: Did you notice Crowley's newspaper?

G: What's it say?

C: It's called The Infernal Times, and the stories are like, "Uptick in Exorcisms in blah blah blah City," like, he's reading like, the demon newspaper.

G: Right in front of a witchhunter. Love that for him.

C: Exactly. Love that.

G: I wrote in my notes, "We realize that Shadwell thinks Crowley is the son of the Crowley he met in the 60s." But I think many people have realized that before. But yeah. Crowley sends Shadwell to find Adam in Tadfield, and, you know, his details are quite limited. He just says, "There's a boy there. He's about 11, and he's in Tadfield. Look for anything suspicious." Also, he pays this guy 250 pounds. Is that a lot? Or is that not a lot?

C: I mean, it's not a lot, I think. Also like, later, Shadwell refers to it as annual dues, which like-

G: No, I think that one is different. That one is for- this one is for a job, and I think Aziraphale is just sponsoring this guy for no reason whatsoever. [laughs] Why is that? 'Cause like, we don't see how Aziraphale meets Shadwell. So could it be that the angels are supporting witchhunters? Like, even way back?

C: I think there is a passage in the book about it, but I don't remember.

G: Is Heaven pro hunting witches now? Is that the implication? Or did Aziraphale just hire these people for-

C: Oh, okay, here's the passage in the book. "Neither Aziraphale nor Crowley ran the Witchfinder Army, but they both approved of it, or at least knew that it would be approved of by their superiors. So it appeared on the list of Aziraphale's agencies because it was, well, a witchfinder army, and you had to support anyone calling themselves witchfinders in the same way that the USA had to support anyone calling themselves anti-Communist." [G laughs] That's the line in the book.

G: Shadwell is so annoying. Do you like him? I don't like him.

C: No. No one likes him.

G: I know we're not supposed to like him, but like-

C: We're supposed to find his behavior acceptable and just like, of a funny old man who doesn't know better, I think is sort of the vibe. But, like, I'm annoyed. Like, I don't find it admissible or whatever.

G: Yeah! No, it's just, you asked me if you think Shadwell and Crowley fucked-

C: In 1967.

G: - and I was like, “Well, that's an odd thing to say, isn't it?” Yeah. I mean, he calls Aziraphale a pansy, so maybe not.

C: He sure does. So yeah, probably not. I think this is only because I saw a fic of it once, and I was like, "Huh! What an interesting take. I wonder if anyone else will read that vibe in."

G: Well, I don't.

C: No. I think there's tension in their conversation in Soho, but I don't think that it is at all sexual, but I think it could be construed as such because all tension is made of the same material.

G: I mean, we'll get it- No, we we already got into it [laughs] last episode, but that scene is so- like, the way Shadwell is like, raising his hand and being like, "Oh, a while ago you must have noticed that I did this." And it's like, "Okay." [laughs] You know what I mean? Even then, he was unbearable.

C: Yeah. I appreciate this scene because it's like, "Crowley's not giving up hope" sort of shit. He says that he'll drop the money off for him on Saturday. It's hard for me- I can't tell if it's- It feels like a "Because I believe that we'll still be here on Saturday" sort of thing.

G: No, I think it's more of a-

C: - it doesn't feel like a "Oh, it doesn't matter. I can just promise you that because it won't be here." Or, what do you think?

G: I think it's the second one.

C: Okay. Yeah. Money doesn't mean anything to Crowley, though.

G: Money, yeah. The first miracle we see on screen is in the history of their life-

C: Oh, Aziraphale miracling a coin-

G: - in 1601, yeah.

-

C: We cut back to Anathema and Adam, and she's telling him about, like, her family history with occultism and shit. The camerawork on Anathema right now is quite odd. I feel like, of all the characters, she's the one that they have look directly into the camera like, framed very intensely a lot more often than the others. It's to give some kind of effect. I think the whatever effect works.

G: They're trying to make her, like, look intense. So it works, I guess.

C: Yeah, it works, I guess. She talks about ley lines, she talks about auras, says that she can see them for everyone, but for some reason, she just can't see [both] Adam's. But this doesn't really arouse her suspicion that much 'cause, well, you know, suspicion slides off him like water off a duck. And then she starts getting into- She says that school is an oppressive tool of the state. Real. [laughs]

G: Real.

C: And then she starts talking about like, just like, environmentalism stuff that like, is sort of on the border- or I don't even know exactly.

G: She started with "thing that is happening that is real" and then "thing that's a little bit 'girl, I what you're talking about?'" you know?

C: Yeah. Right. Like, “They're clubbing baby seals. They're cutting down the rainforest so you can get a cheap hamburger,” blah blah, "global warming, nuclear power," etc. And it's like, yeah, some of these things are real issues. And it's kind of weird that they're being lumped in with the other things. But oh well. I mean, I think all the talking points are things that I've seen in organizations that exist. I don't think they're opinions that are like, fringe opinions, necessarily. But like, that is what is up. Adam agrees with her that nuclear power stations suck, but he thinks that that's the case because there was nothing bubbling or green smoke, and no one was wearing a spacesuit. And Anathema's like, "Yeah, we need to get rid of all of them." And Adam's like, "Mm-hm. For not bubbling." And then she sends him off and she gives him, like- she says, "If you're interested in any of this stuff, I have some old magazines here." and she hands him a bunch of like-

G: Old. Old.

C: - copies of- old, old, old copies of The New Aquarian, this magazine. And, like, you see some glimpses of the headlines, and they're not related to this stuff! It's like, "Atlantis Discovered," like, "Kraken in the Ocean." And then, like, you know, my personal favorite, "Secret Tibetan Masters: The Facts From Fiction."

G: Yeah.

C: Which is like, "Okay, so we're just doing [both] Orientalism conspiracy theories here." And that's gonna be like, the same thing as global warming? O-  I mean it's not like- The writer having all these things together isn't necessarily equating them. It's just like, for Anathema, there's a bit of a slippery slope from like, real problems into like, conspiracy theory shit or whatever. But like, I still- upon all my readings and my regards, I'm still just sort of confused about what they're going for here. And maybe they're not going for anything. Maybe they were just like, "This would be fun."

G: Yeah.

C: And sure. Maybe it would be fun. I mean, I have said that I'm kind of aware that Anathema and Newton will get together. I don't know how they would get together, like, to what degree, but damn, would they be an odd, odd couple. [laughs] Like, guy who joins a Witchfinder Army who like, promises to make you feel like a man or whatever and girl who reads all of this shit. Like, okay.

C: This is like, a small thing or whatever, but like, Anathema's race isn't specified in the book. In the show, I think, because of the raceblind casting like, she's Latina, and like, that doesn't change anything about her writing, which is like, how it goes with raceblind casting. You don't change your writing based off of the character's new ethnicity, but it would be nice if that was taken into account at all with like, her witchcraft and her beliefs. But, eh. Whatever. I do not expect such things from Neil Gaiman.

-

G: So we are now in Heaven, and Aziraphale is trying to tell the angels about, well, all of it. But he's having a hard time conveying this situation. 'Cause every time he says anything, it's with an air of, "Well, it's not impossible..." or "It might have..." or "It is a possibility..." Like, he is hedging all of his fucking bets. And yeah, he tells them like, "Oh, you know. I think maybe Hell has lost the boy," and like, they don't believe him, but he is like, "Oh, it's possible that the demon Crowley"--and then he laughs nervously, and he's like. "Oh, he's a wiley adversary. Keeps me on my toes, I tell you." [C laughs] And like, what is going on?

C: [laughing] Literally, friendship is too revealing, because this is how he fucking talks about her.

G: And he's like, "You know, I think that the fact that the ambassador's son is hellspawn may be a ruse, and that the Antichrist might be..." and then he pauses a bit, and you can see gears turn in his head. And instead of saying "Tadfield," he says, "Somewhere else."

C: Yeah. "Where?" is like, demanded of him, and he like, commits. He decides not to tell them. He says that he doesn't know. Which I think is- at what point do you think he decided that he didn't trust Heaven enough to actually say what he was rehearsing in the bookstore?

G: I was gonna say it's after he said that like, Hell has lost the boy, and they like, keep questioning him and being like, "No, no, no, that's not true." But like, even before that, he was already very hesitant and already acting like maybe he shouldn't say all these things, you know? So did he just get up there and immediately was like, "Oh, no, no, no, no!" but like, it's too late, he has to talk to them?

C: I don't think he was like, "I don't want to tell them anything at all." I think he was like. "Okay, I'll tell them, and they'll like, kill the boy or do something, and then we'll be fine." And then, like, he sorta gets up there, and he's like, "Oh, I don't trust these people. But like, I still need to see how I can save the world 'cause I don't want it to end, so like, I'm just gonna like, do all this bets-hedging and like, hypothetical stuff because I want to like, weigh my options. Like, what would Heaven do if I told them? And then I should go back and think about whether or not I should tell them."

G: Eventually, the angels say that like, it doesn't matter whether the Antichrist is somewhere else or not or someone else or not. There was a war before there was Earth, and there will be war again. And, you know, the angels walk out, leaves Aziraphale there. And as they walk towards the endless lobbies of Heaven, Gabriel stops the other angels and goes like, "What do you guys think of that?" And, you know, all of them are like, "We don't trust that guy." And one of them actually says that Aziraphale is an angel that has been down there too long.

I mean, we've seen Crowley talk to Hell, right?

C: Yeah. And like, basically exact same wording and tone of like, "I don't trust him."

G: Yeah. But like, I guess, with the demons, it was easier to like, "Oh, yeah, that's just how it is." Like, it's easier to think that because in your head, you're like, "Oh, they're demons. Well, of course they don't trust each other." But like, this kind of distaste and distrust for Aziraphale feels a lot more poignant and like, "Oh, there must be something up," like that kind of feeling. 'Cause then it's not just like, "Oh, angels are just like this." It's like, he's being treated differently.

C: I guess another- Again, back to trying to make the bandstand scene fit. I guess another way to read this is like, Crowley got Aziraphale to help because she was like, "Well, like, they can't actually be mad at you if you're like, thwarting me. Like, how do you know that thwarting me isn't part of the Divine Plan as well?" And like, every time Aziraphale's reported up there in the past like, it's definitely been heavily implied that they still want the war to go on, and that like, they're happy about it. But like, I feel like he never- They never explicitly say that. But like, here, he finally does it. He finally asks, like, "Well, there doesn't have to be another war, does there?" And they say like, "Yes. We want another war no matter what." And the way that I read it all the first times I watched it is like, "Well, this is like, about Aziraphale’s trust in Heaven being broken," etc, etc. But if I'm trying to fit fucking bandstand scene into here, like, maybe this is his trust that what he was doing was part of The Plan in the first place, like, that's the part that gets broken?

G: Yeah! Yeah. That makes sense.

C: He's like, "Oh, I've been doing the wrong thing this entire time. Like, I can't keep doing this."

G: It's not part of The Plan any more. Aw.

C: Yeah. And I feel that's the best way that I can understand his actions.

G: Yeah. I find it so fascinating also that the way Heaven dictates what needs to be done, it never is like, "You can't do this." Aziraphale is not denied anything. He's not denied food. He's not denied pleasures of the flesh or the whatever. [C laughs] He's not like- nothing is off-limits.

C: He's denying himself the pleasures of the flesh. [G laughs]

G: No, even what you said, right? Like, when he was like, "Oh, yeah, I'm doing all I can to stop the apocalypse," they were like, "Well, okay. It's fine, I guess." You know, like, he's

allowed to do anything. It's just that [laughs] there's one thing that he's not allowed or like, he has convinced himself that he's not allowed. That's the crux of it.

C:  I think, yeah, I feel like for the stopping the apocalypse stuff, it was just like, the angels all believe in the Divine Plan so much and like, also don't believe in Aziraphale at all. So it's just like, "Oh, I mean, like, he can do whatever he wants 'cause like, it doesn't really hurt us in any way."

G: Yeah.

C: But I feel like at this point, they start being a little more wary.

G: Damn. Did they really think Aziraphale is so incompetent it's unreal? I mean, they better do, because he is. [both laughing] He literally is, though.

C: He's not that bad! [laughs] He's not that incompetent. But yeah, okay, for- Yeah. Maybe he is.

G: Maybe he is!

C: But so's Crowley, and that's what's important.

-

C: We go back to Anathema, and she's in town. She's seeing everyone's auras, and it gives me a headache to see through her eyes, so she must have a headache all the time. Maybe that's why she has such an intense gaze.

G: Oh, by the way, did you mention that the reason why-

C: Oh, the fucking- Sorry, I totally forgot the fucking zoom-out. Okay, I forgot. At the end of the Anathema and Adam scene- I actually quite like this scene. I don't know why I forgot it. God Narrator is like, "Anathema didn't really consider the-" sorry, let me find the actual line. Okay. "It might have helped Anathema to understand what was going on. If she understood the very simple reason why she couldn't see Adam's aura." And then it starts like, zooming out from Adam really really fast until we get to like, the entire globe, and she says, "It's for the same reason that people in Times Square can't see America." And we see that his aura is like, a giant red glow that covers, like, at least all of the UK, and then, like, a good amount of-

G: A bit more, yeah.

C: Europe and the ocean around. And I thought that was neat.

G: That was neat!

C: Good job, you did a visual, and it was cool. And it was cool to go to Heaven right after, because it does feel like "We're zooming out of Earth, and now let's go even up higher."

G: Yeah, I did find fascinating- When I first watched this, I didn't really catch the visual. I don't know why. Maybe I wasn't looking. The panning out and the aura being as big as an entire country, like, it didn't sink into me that that was what's happening. So I just didn't know what the fuck, like, Times Square America thing was about. Like, what was that about? And then I was like, "Ah. 'Cause like, America's so big. Whatever."

C: Yeah, I recall also not understanding it first time I watched it, [G laughs] and having to like, go on fucking Reddit and read someone's response about it. So I think this is a pretty common phenomenon, because I feel like the aura is like- I feel like it's hard to see the visual they presented and be like, "Oh, that, specifically, is Adam's aura." 'cause it sort of looks like, a regular glow that you might just put as an effect to be pretty on the Earth or something.

Anathema runs into R. P. Tyler, who is played by...

G: No idea.

C: Fleabag's dad!

G: Man, who give a shit about Fleabag's dad? Get Claire in here or get no one.

C: Fair. I just think every- I think I get excited whenever I see any Fleabag actor anywhere. Like, the rat tooth guy is in The Afterparty Season 1, and that was exciting to see.

He's neighborhood watch. and he's very suspicious, very grumpy. He thinks that Anathema is "casing the joint" for what? Who even knows? And he very much doesn't like that she is American. She asks him to help her find the Antichrist. She goes like, "11 years ago, something came to this village. Some sort of beast or creature. And if you're neighbourhood watch, maybe you noticed." And she does this thing where she like, smiles and like, taps him on the chest at the end of that, which is like, is she like, trying- I mean, it's like, a flattery thing, but it also just looks like flirting or something weird that, like, she's trying on him to get him to answer the question. Like, I found it quite jarring. And like, I don't know. I feel like I've always read an Anathema as an aromantic lesbian, and like, this move really helps solidify that for me. Like, she's like, "I have to ask this man a question. Well, from all my YouTube tutorials that I watched about persuasion and flirting and things like that, I think I should do this." Like, her mannerisms are like, a bit unsettling, or like, just off during this interaction, and I think it's because she's an aromantic lesbian to me.

And he thinks that she's high, so he has a funny little line where he's like, "Tadfield is a perfectly respectable village. If you're coming here to smoke your fatty spliffers and bimble off to woo woo land, then I suggest that you go elsewhere. Like, back to America!" Anathema's not even American in the book.

G: Really?

C: Yeah.

G: What is she?

C: I think she's just like, British.

G: But like, she did move to the village, right? C: Yeah, but from like, elsewhere in the UK.

G: Ah, okay.

-

G: So we go back to Shadwell’s place, and Newton is still there, looking over the paper, cutting out pieces of strange occurrences and whatnot, and the phone in the hall rings, and Madame Tracy is the one who answers it. And it is Aziraphale, but he's looking for Shadwell. He calls himself Shadwell’s "sponsor," which, you know, we've talked about a while ago. And he asks Shadwell to poke around Tadfield, and, you know, Shadwell’s like, “Okay." Aziraphale starts talking to Shadwell about the deceased Major Milk Bottle. And I don't like this in that, like, he's not stupid. Don't do that to him. Or do you think this is in character?

C: I mean, for the show character where he fell for the the 1941 stuff, and he's explicitly called gullible, I feel like Neil is just continuing a thing that he decided.

G: He sends over the name and address, and they hang up, and Shadwell just goes. "Ugh. Great Southern pansy!"

C: Yeah.

G: Wow

C: Wow! I guess a few things- the fact that Aziraphale, like, he went to Heaven, and they were like, "You're going against The Plan," and that he still did this is like, pretty cool of him. Like, I think it's just his thing where it's like, his actions are based off of his feelings, but his words are based off of his thoughts, which are all like, Heaven-poisoned and stuff. He hasn't given up on doing this at all. Like, he's still sending Shadwell there. But also, he's sending Shadwell there just to monitor Adam. Like, this is like a- I guess this is like, an information gathering step for him still. He's like, "I haven't given up yet, but like, I still won't really act." But, you know, good for him for not giving up yet. Second, we also got some more Shadwell and Madam Tracy interactions before he gets on the phone. And it just continues to be annoying. Like, I just don't- I don't like it. I don't like this dynamic. It's just like, we learn now that, like, she like, cooks all his meals for him and like, brings them over to his apartment, and he eats them. And like, he's still just going on like, doing nothing but like, being like, incredibly whorephobic to her at all times? I just- I don't like the idea that this character- I just don't like Shadwell as a concept. As like, the old man who's like, old-fashioned and like, cranky. But, like, you know, everyone around him still tolerates it and thinks it's okay, 'cause he's just silly or whatever. I'm annoyed about it. In the book - like, they take this out - but like, it's like, he has - his landlord are, I think, Bangladeshi, and like, he's like, racist towards them, and stuff like that. And then there's a passage about how like, "You know, despite all of this, people just can't help but like Shadwell." And it's like, no? No!

G: That's so not true. I can help it.

C: No. I don't like him. No one likes him. Stop trying to portray him as likable. It's annoying. I'm annoyed. Sorry, Madame Tracy.

Okay, I guess third thing, this is the first time Aziraphale gets homophobiaed in the show, right? We've talked about his first book homophobia, but, you know, just to note that like, maybe if Neil wanted to clarify that they can never be gay because they're not men - apparently you have to be a man to be gay - he should have taken out all the times that he experiences homophobia that is specific to like, being a gay guy or just a gay person who is masc-leaning. Perhaps that would help your case, Neil Gaiman.

G: Neil really said, like, "Everybody in the world sees him as gay, and he may as well be, but he isn't!" Like, girl, come on.

C: Yeah. It's very important to me that Aziraphale, like, chooses how he looks, he chooses his presentation, and he chooses his voice, 'cause like, these are all things that are not like, really part of Heaven. Like, he decided them. And like, he decided that, like, he was going to present as like, the gayest guy ever.

G: Yeah.

C: So like, he is gay. Like, that's how he self-identifies.

G: And I don't think he's stupid that he doesn't realize how the world sees him.

C: Yeah, he absolutely knows. So what's up?

G: Anyway, Shadwell goes into his flat, and, you know, Newton tells him that like, "Oh, I have some interesting findings. There's a town in Oxfordshire that always has picture perfect weather for the last 11 years," and for some reason Shadwell was like, "I don't give a shit." [C laughs] God. This guy's not only horrible, he's also stupid.

C: That's true. He managed to scam Aziraphale and Crowley for... um, 1967, 2016- I don't know math. 49? 49 years?

G: Hell yeah.

C: Hell yeah.

G: Newton is, you know, trying to get Shadwell to agree, but Shadwell's saying like, "Oh, find some real witch phenomenons, boy." So yeah.

C: Yeah. I'm interested in the fact that it's been happening for the last 11 years. Because the idea about Tadfield and the ways that Adam has changed it is that sort of it's like his unconscious desires coming out and shaping reality. Like, are you telling me that, like, as an infant, he was like, "I really want it to snow on Christmas Eve." How would he know what Christmas is?

G: Yeah, he's already aware. Yeah.

C: But yeah, I also do like the concept. Like, just the ways that, like, you as a young boy who like, reads stories and like, has an idealized view of the world would like, create the weather. Like, that's neat. Some neat detail.

-

C: We cut to a new scene in Des Moines, where we are meeting Famine. So I guess this is like, the point where- two main thoughts about this part. One part, positive, is that our criticism of War the last episode was sort of around, like, "You wrote like, a funny book, and then, like, you were like, 'For this war section, I will just do actual war in like, an area that the West generally views as war-torn and like, removed from itself. And I'm just gonna do that and be like, sort of racist about it.'" And we both were like, "If you're gonna do the Horsemen, get a little jiggy with it." And I think that Famine being portrayed as like, a restaurant owner who like, manufactures diet food or things like that that like, leave people hungry is indeed getting jiggy with it. So I do appreciate that. I think on the negative end, there is just general discomfort around probably, like, any possible casting for any of the Horsemen ever, just because these characters are representative of a concept more than they are people. Like, I feel like every other character on the show, like, I sort of get a personality from them. I feel like War and Famine so far have just been like- they are just representative of the concept that they are. And I think that casting Famine as a Black man can just automatically feel iffy because of the whole like, "There are children starving in Africa," like, thing that I feel like I grew up hearing. I feel like a lot of people in the West grew up hearing.

G: Well, the thing is, you know, this Famine is so far removed from that-

C: Yeah. I agree with that.

G: - so I don't particularly see it in that way. I think, like, the casting is good in that I like the way it's acted. Like, I think this guy does a good job of being like, a sophisticated yet smarmy business guy who is making this diet food that he thinks is so great even though it's so bad.

C: Agreed, yeah. He's a fun time. I guess just at this, I just want to like, briefly mention, like, three moments- Like, now that we're talking about raceblind casting, I want to briefly mention three moments that race is specified in the casting in the scriptbook for this episode. First one, with the angels, it's specified that they're meant to be of multiple races and multiple genders to like, give more that like, universal, they could be anyone, blah blah vibe. Which I think is like, good, and I think, is like not achieved that well, given that it's just like, white people and then Uriel.

G: The two angels we see the most of at this point is, well, Sandalphon and Gabriel, aside from, you know, obviously, Aziraphale. Like, all three of them are white [laughs], so like-

C: White men. Yeah. I don't know how well that was achieved, but I appreciate the sentiment. I appreciate that it was something that was thought about.

The second time that race is mentioned in the scriptbook for this episode is for Rome in the flashback sequence. Specifically, he specifies that the bartender is to be "Female and Black, with attitude." That one I feel a lot less positively about. It feels very much just like, "Let's get a sassy Black woman in here." And I can see why part of it would be about like, showing that there were people of color in ancient Rome, which is a very like, whitewashed part of history that, like, white supremacists, are really into, etc etc. But like, why "with attitude"? Something to ask. And then the third one, I'm not really sure if there's a purpose to it, or like, what the deal is there, but Neil specifies that Spike, who is the man that Crowley is talking to about the Soho heist before Shadwell shows up, is supposed to be Black and also like, wearing fancy clothes. I briefly tried to see if this was like, a reference to an actual historical figure or something, and the words “dangerous spike,” which is what he is called in the script, they don't really show me anything on Google, but it's possible that it's a reference that I'm missing. If anyone knows, let me know.

Back to Famine. The deal here is, you know, he's Famine. He's called Dr. Raven Sable. We first meet him with his assistant in a fancy restaurant where, like, there's no food, it's just like, froth and lavender-scented air and all that. He sort of says, like, excitedly to his assistant, like, "I've never seen a room full of rich people so hungry before." It's fun. He is a fun character. And then we meet his restaurant chain, which is like, some- I think it's like, Burger Lord is what it's called in the book? But they serve CHOW, which is not food. It's an edible substance that is completely artificial and designed so that your digestive enzymes ignore everything that is in them while it continues to taste like food. There's not too much to say. Like, cool concept. I think that in the book, they tie it a little bit closer to diet culture than they do in the show. But like, I'm fine with this scene.

G: Yeah, like, the only tie-in here is really the towards the end when he goes, "It's good for people who are trying to lose weight.Or all their other organ system usage." And I was like, "Oh, that's pretty funny." Like, "Can cause weight loss and kidney failure." So fucking true!

C: Sure can.

Oh, also, there's like, a bit where Elvis is working in the diner and singing along to "Hound Dog."

G: I don't understand that. Like, I understand that like, that's Elvis. Like, that's pretty much the the capacity at which I understand it. What's the bit about?

C: The bit, I think it's supposed to be a reference to the book. Because in the book it talks about the magazine that War is a journalist for, and there's like, a line that was like, "Oh, it like, published like, random bullshit all the time like, it said that something happened with like, Jesus, and something happened with whatever, and that Elvis was working as a fry cook in Des Moines, and only one of those was true." Like, I think it's just a Easter egg for book people. Maybe it's like, an actual Elvis conspiracy that exists, but I don't know. I don't know what people think about that guy.

G: Mm-hm.

C: But yeah, the delivery person, he shows up and he hands Dr. Sable a package, and it is a tiny little set of measuring scales. And Famine's very like, entranced by the whole thing, and he tells his assistant to cancel all of his appointments for the foreseeable future

G: Me after watching Season 1, Episode 3.  [laughs]

C: You did do that.

G: I did do that. You guys will not believe the amount of moving around I did in my calendar to accommodate "thinking about Good Omens" time. [both laughing] It was crazy.

So we're on back to Shadwell's place, and Newton is there, and he has done even more research or whatnot, and he is still trying to convince Shadwell that the weather thing is relevant and important. And he's like, "Maybe I should go to Tadfield. Like, I'll check it out. Just a quick nip, and like, I'll even get my own petrol!" And like, the moment he said that, I was like, "Well, of course Shadwell's sending him. But like, is he gonna make the kid pay for his gas?" Don't do that, Shadwell. But knowing this guy, he probably did.

C: Oh, absolutely.

G: Anyway, Shadwell is like, “Is the place you're talking about Tadfield?” And when Newt was like, "Yeah." he tells, "Okay, you can go, but like, come back tomorrow at 9 so that you can get your armor of righteousness." Wonder what that is.

C: Wonder what that is.

G: Wonder what that is.

C: It's not even important.

G: It's not?

C: I don't even remember. It's that unimportant.

G: Yeah.

C: [laughs] Maybe it is. Who knows? I don't remember other characters in the show?

-

C: So Crowley calls Aziraphale, but in the scriptbook, there is a scene before that that doesn't get put in. And, I mean, it's not very important, but it matters to me. And what happens is just- Is it so obvious that I'm just scrolling really fast trying to find it right now while I'm talking? [both laugh] [groans] Where is it?

It's a brief, no dialogue scene in Crowley's bedroom, and it's a montage of him trying to fall asleep. And he's like, lying on the bed, and then the wall, and then the ceiling.

G: Aww!

C: And then- I know! And then it's- yeah. And then, like, it's them, like, putting on their glasses while hanging off the ceiling, and then like, pacing throughout the flat and watering their plants. And then she calls Aziraphale. Which, I would have liked to see it. It would have been nice. That was cute, and it's also a way of showing the stress that both of them are under because I feel like it's important to remember how stressed they are when you're analyzing the bandstand scene. But oftentimes, I forget how stress they are and how the world is literally going to end, because they're like, too busy being like, silly and funny, you know what I mean?

G: Yeah. Last episode. I said that "Oh, the shouting at the plants scene," blah blah blah. Now I do think that like- no, yeah, he's having a rough time. [both laugh] Like, give him a break.

C: [laughs] Yeah. Yeah, she's having a rough go of it.

G: Literally, she's having a rough time. Give her a break.

C: They call Aziraphale. It's like, Aziraphale POV of getting the call.

G: Yeah. Maybe that is the reason why?

C: Yeah, maybe that's why this scene was removed? 'Cause it's like, "This is our Aziraphale episode." They tell him to meet them at the third alternative rendezvous, and apparently, their third alternative rendezvous- like, their rendezvous include the old bandstand, the #19 bus, which I think is where they met after their Heaven and Hell meetings in Episode 1, and the British Museum cafe, which we haven't seen. And Crowley's like, "Ugh. I'm trying to be like, secretive here. Okay, it's the bandstand. I'll be there in fifteen." And you know what? She sure will be there in fifteen.

So we get, like, this crane shot of like, Aziraphale walking to the bandstand-

G: And Crowley's already there, yeah.

C: And Crowley's already there, which is sort of a reverse of a lot of the flashbacks where Aziraphale’s already there, and then Crowley shows up. I do wonder if the any of the crane shots are supposed to indicate God watching, or if it's just to look cool.

G: I think maybe if they really wanted to indicate that God was watching, they would have thrown a narration line or other.

C: That's true. I mean, there'd be no lines to narrate given that none of this shit is on the book, though.

G: Oh, yeah! Is it implied that it happens in some way in the book? Like does the rest of the story add up?

C: No. No, not really. No. I don't think this happened in the book. I don't think this would happen in the book.

G: They're different people, yeah.

C: Yeah, they're different people. He shows up, and Crowley asks about news. Aziraphale's nervous, lying, etc. Because Crowley's like, "Oh, yeah, so do you have the missing Antichrist's name, address, and shoe size yet?" And Aziraphale's like, "Shoe size. Why would I have his shoe size?"

G: You know, I'm so impressed with you, Crystal, that you don't even attempt to do any of the accents.

C: No, god.

G: Which is- yeah! I mean, Crowley speaks in such a certain way, doesn't he?

C: Yeah. And I'm gonna break my heart by proving to myself that I can't ever be him.

G: [laughs] Ah, okay.

C: But yeah. I will never do a voice, ever ever ever. And Crowley should call me, and I would treat her so much better than Aziraphale ever could. I would never, ever fumble he/she/they goth David Tennant. [G laughs] But anyway, so, Crowley's like, "I was- I was joking. I also have nothing." And at Crowley saying that she's got nothing. Aziraphale says, “It's the Great Plan, Crowley.” Which means, like- First off, Aziraphale has the information. He's choosing not to tell it. And now he's telling Crowley, "God wants you to not know shit."

G: Yeah.

C: [laughs] What a rude thing to do.

G: The discussion we had about what book Aziraphale was thinking was, I think it could be applied here, but I doubt it. Especially later on in this scene, where it's very evident that Crowley really, really, really wants to stop the apocalypse and doesn't seem to be beholden by any obligation to Hell whatsoever anymore.

C: Mm-hm. Yeah.

G: So I have no idea what Aziraphale’s thinking.

C: I mean, I guess, like, what he means is just like, "God doesn't want us to be able to stop it, and maybe we shouldn't." But like, I also don't know if that's what he means.

G: Why does he think that?

C: I mean, I guess he just had a really bad meeting with his boss. I get it. [both laugh] But like, I also don't.

G: Yeah.

C: It's odd. It's very odd. But also, like, I guess I have to remember that this betrayal already happened last episode when he chose not to tell Crowley about the book, and then lied to them on the phone already. Like, it's happened. This is maybe just him sticking to his guns. But then I wonder why it happened last episode as well. Like, why didn't he? I mean, like, was this even- like, was this a fucking longcon? Was it like, "I will work with you, but if I find anything that's like, truly, truly important and confidential. I just won't tell you"? How long did he know that he didn't- that he wouldn't trust Crowley enough? Or that he couldn't trust Crowley enough? 'Cause like, I mean, I think when you go into panic mode like, there are mindsets you can revert to, and one of those is just like, "I don't know anything. Anything I do could fuck everything up forever. So I should just do what I'm told by Heaven."

G: Yeah.

C: So, like, okay. But like, he's also calling Shadwell and telling him to keep an eye on Adam. Like, what's up? I mean, it's fine to have contradictory statements and contradictory actions, 'cause that is-

G: What it's like, yeah.

C: - sort of how one shows, like, your internal strife. And like, maybe he doesn't like, mean anything he's saying right now. 'Cause like, I think he doesn't mean some of it.

G: Of course.

C: But I just find it difficult to understand why. Because I'm not an Aziraphale understander.

G: And I guess neither am I, even though I hesitate to say the words "love" [laughs] when referring to his feelings for Crowley [C laughing] for no fucking reason.

C: Do you feel comfortable saying that Crowley loves Aziraphale?

G: Yeah, I think so. He really does, though, is the thing.

C: Wow, okay. Yeah, he really does.

Yeah, okay, so yeah, you truly are- you can be Aziraphale-coded [G laughs] without understanding everything, I suppose.

G: This well may be.

C: So Crowley sorta shouts toward the sky like, "For the record, great pustulent mangled bollocks to the Great blasted Plan!" in a yeah overhead shot that I think is kind of silly.

G: I think it's fine.

C: She kind of just looks silly to me. But like, maybe it's just about the futility of shouting at God when She don't give a shit. Sorry, when She DGAF.

G: She DGAF. Yeah.

C: And then Aziraphale goes, “May you be forgiven.”

G: What is all this, then? What is all this?

C: What is all this, then? I can understand intellectually that he still loves God and has a strong faith in her, but, like, [laughing] I don't think I've seen anything from him that implies that this is true.

G: Okay. Do you think like, after the conversation with Gabriel, Aziraphale just has lost hope. 'Cause that can be a way to look at it. Like, now, it's like, he just understands that it's going to happen, and this is all gonna end with him and Crowley on opposite sides, so might as well not engage. Might as well not like, hope for anything else. Might as well just tell Crowley, like, "Well, I hope you be forgiven." You know, like-

C: Yeah.

G: 'Cause the thing is, maybe if I see how he acts next episode, I'll understand it more or like, have confirmation or rebuttal over this, but I think that could be a way to look at it right now.

C: I suppose so. Especially 'cause okay, like, where it goes next is Crowley goes, "I won't be forgiven, not ever. That's part of a demon's job description. Unforgivable. That's what I am."

G: He goes, "That's hwhat," and I love it so much. It's completely irrelevant to anything.

C: No, it's cute.

G: I love it when people say the wh, and then they pronounce it-

C: As an hw, yeah. Same. And Aziraphale goes, "You were an angel once." And Crowley goes, "That was a long time ago." So okay, so- is the idea, like- Okay, like, "It's hopeless. We're gonna be fighting on a war on opposite sides... Come back to Heaven?" Is that an interpretation? Like, "Come back to Heaven. We'll win. I'll keep you safe." like, what- Is that it?

G: I don't think it is. It's just an- actually, maybe.

C: There is a fun part in the book where both of them ask the other one, "Hey, do you think your people would give me asylum?" "I was literally just about to ask you the same thing. Probably not." "Okay. Well, we're screwed." But like, the show versions would just like, literally never do that 'cause they're worse. [laughs] I didn't say that. But- "You were an angel." I just don't- I don't like- Okay, what does that mean? Like, "Once you had faith in God and The Great Plan, and like, you would just let things happen"? Or like, "Once, you were a 'good' person," even though, like, she is a good person all the time, and it's like, independent from her nature.

G: I don't know. It's like- it's a response to like, "I won't be forgiven. It's what I am." So maybe it's "Who you are has changed. You were an angel once. It doesn't have to be this way always, and like, I mean, you were an angel. You were not supposed to rebel, or whatever it is you did to Fall, but you did. And you're a demon, you're not supposed to be forgiven, but maybe you will be."

C: Okay. That's a nicer interpretation. I'll let that happen.

G: Okay.

C: Crowley's like, "Okay, like, we can find the boy. My agents can find him." Which, I know that they aren't seeing the signs coming up every time they show up on screen that say "One day before the end of the world," so like, they probably think they have more time than they have. But I do think that this is like, such a recklessly optimistic thing for Crowley to say. And like, I don't know- I don't think that they believe it here necessarily. I think they're like, sort of grasping at straws. But is nice just to see that both of them are still- or at least Crowley is still trying- and Aziraphale is still trying because he called Shadwell- that both of them are still trying, despite all of this.

G: Yeah.

C: Thanks, guys. Aziraphale is like, “Okay. And then what? If we find the boy, like, what? We eliminate him?” which is the same language that he used when he was practicing for Heaven, wherein he seemed a lot more up for that to happen. But I guess just in the time being he's just, I don't know, thought about what it's like to kill an 11-year-old and gone, "Maybe not"? I don't really know what the deal is, necessarily. And then Crowley goes, "Well, somebody does. I'm not personally up for killing kids." [laughs] Which is incredibly funny of her to say, I think. But like, very consistent with like, everything where it's just like, "I don't want to be directly responsible, but I do need the world to be safe." And I spent so much of Episode 1 being like, “Aziraphale’s so nice for never suggesting that Crowley do it!” but unfortunately-

G: [laughs] He does do it, yeah.

C: - Aziraphale's niceness has a- It's over. It's crover, as the kids say. He goes, "You're the demon. I'm the nice one. I don't have to kill children. If you kill him, then the world gets a reprieve, and Heaven does not have blood on its hands." What even goes on?

G: I mean, Heaven is going to allow the world to burn. Obviously, blood in their hands is not a concern.

C: Yeah. He literally like, just talked to Sandalphon, who did Sodom and Gomorrah.

G: Yeah. We just saw Noah's ark.

C: Yeah. I mean, I just- I guess the idea is like, I mean, Aziraphale means like, "I don't want blood on my hands."

G: Yeah, pretty much.

C: But like, he's sort of hiding behind the company label, the "I'm not consulted on policy decisions" label in order to like, bring the focus off of him, I suppose is what's happening. And I understand that, I suppose. But god, don't ask Crowley to do it. That's so mean! [laughing] I know I have literally nothing to say to Crowley telling Aziraphale to do it. Like, I literally don't give a shit that Crowley did that. [both laughing] But Aziraphale, how could you??! That's so mean!

G: [laughs] Yeah.

C: I mean, Aziraphale's not the one who likes children, so.

G: No, but only because when Crowley says it, it's like, "Ah, maybe you should do it." But like, there's no real bite to it.

C: Yeah. And Aziraphale's like, [laughs] "You are broken to your core due to Falling from Heaven. Go kill that child so I don't have to."

G: Yeah.

C: I don't know. I guess panic just does things to you. It simply just does things to you.

And then Crowley goes like, "Oh, no blood on your hands. That's a bit holier than thou, isn't it?" And Aziraphale goes, "I am a great deal holier than thou. That's the whole point." which, I mean, you know, that's just him continuing his thing, but like, boy, does it- boy is it not fun to watch it happen. Crowley is funny again, thank god, by saying, "You should kill the boy yourself. [both] Holily." And, I mean, both of them are like, "Okay, we're at an impasse. Fucking hate talking to you right now. This sucks." Crowley, like, gets like, an insult in, which I feel like is not rare, but like, does hurt a bit more here where they're just like, "This is ridiculous. You're ridiculous. I don't even know why I'm still talking to you."

I mean, this is quite similar to their breakup in St. James's Park, I would say, but it feels so much bigger 'cause we don't know that they'll come back from it, and it's also about something bigger, and it sure is an experience to watch.

Crowley decides that she's leaving. What is Crowley's plan on leaving? Like, do you think they have one at all, or do you think they're just like, "I just can't deal with this emotionally right now."

G: I don't think they have a plan.

C: Yeah. Sorry to these people. And Aziraphale says, "You can't leave, Crowley. [both] There isn't anywhere to go." [laughing] What an insane thing to say! Also, the way that he says Crowley's name, like, I feel like- like, the syllable emphasis is a little different than it usually is, and it makes it sound a lot more defeated than it usually is, and that was a good line delivery. But it's like- I mean, like, clearly, there's somewhere to go. Like, not here. But it's like, in the end, it is all going to be burnt up.

Is this a little bit Aziraphale asking him to stay? What is he trying to achieve with this line?

G: That they die together in this rock? [laughs] I don't know.

C: [groans] Maybe so. Like, yeah, I don't know. Just the idea that, like, this world is like- I mean, like, "the fact that it's about to end makes it small, and there's nowhere for you to be besides here with me" is definitely a thing that Aziraphale could say. And did he say it? Maybe.

G: I think it's a continuation of the whole like, throughout all this, Aziraphale has completely reverted to, "It's The Plan. It's The Plan. It's The Plan." And it's like, "There's nowhere else to go" is like, we'll still have to- we still have to follow The Plan, because The Plan is what it is."

C: Yeah, we still have to play our roles.

G: Yeah, like, "There isn't anywhere to go" is less about like, location or whatever, and it's more about like, fate. We are fated to do this, so let's just not fight it.

C: Yeah. Yeah. This is so miserable!

Okay. And there is a scriptbook direction that I don't think is really played out at all in the show. But I do just wanna read it. After this line, it says, "Crowley looks back. He looks at Aziraphale. Above them, a beautiful starry sky. And Crowley softens." And then that's when the "Let's run away together" line is supposed to happen. [laughs] Anyone feeling crazy today? [G laughs] Anyone feeling really crazy today?

G: It really is a big universe. And we can go off together.

C: That is what he says. And Aziraphale goes, "Go off... together? Listen to yourself."

G: And, wait wait wait. The "Go off together," it was like, he's silent for a while, and he goes, "Go off... together?" and the camera does a zoom-in that, like, we all know. We've all seen this zoom, and it's like, "Oh, they're in love."

C: Mm-hm!

G: Like, that's literally- that's what the zoom is trying to tell us. And it's so fascinating because, like, his face changes, too. You know, he's been very upset this entire time, but there is like, a moment of like, hope a little bit when he says this. Like, "Go off together?" like, he's realizing that, like, that is an option. And the next line is, it pans to Crowley, and Crowley is standing in this, like, position where he's opening his arms and being like, "Eh? Eh?" like, that kind of vibe. And it feels like- like, he looks like, "See? Like, there is a way out of this." Like, he looks so- he looks so happy with himself that he has figured out a way to game the system. And then, Aziraphale goes, "Listen to yourself." Moments in a TV show, I guess. [both laugh]

C: Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if Crowley's happy with himself. I think he's just really desperate. But like, this is, I think- okay, yeah, I think this is a moment of hope for Crowley to like, "Everything's gonna be terrible forever, but like, maybe we'll get this one way out that sucks ass and involves the entire destruction of the earth, but, like, hey. At least we won't lose each other, maybe." But yeah, yeah. God, I love the sentence, "Listen to yourself." 'Cause like, Aziraphale doesn't have a real reason to say no. That's like, the sentence you say when it's like, "This feels wrong and bad, but I don't know why it feels wrong and bad. But surely, you must know that it is wrong and bad because of how I am currently feeling." Like, man. What a guy!

G: And also it recontextualizes it from like, "Crowley wants the world to not end" to "Crowley wants to get out of here with me." Which are very different things.

C: Yeah, though I would say that this is just a last resort thing-

G: Of course.

C: - and that Crowley still wants to save the world. But yeah. But the idea that, like, he can live on without the world, but he can't live on with- [laughing] I don't even- that's too corny, I'm not even gonna say that! I'm gonna die!

G: [laughing] It's so crazy corny, but this is really what happens! Like, this is really what's happening! [C screams]

C: Anyway! So! Honestly, they'd be fucking miserable in space together. Thank god they don't end up in space together.

G: Literally, there won't be any crepes there, and, you know, Aziraphale's gonna get peckish.

C: Yeah. And tetchy, even.

G: And tetchy, even.

C: So Crowley make sort of like, a pleading gesture, and she goes, "How long have we been friends? 6000 years." [screaming]

G: From the very beginning. Crowley thinks they've been friends from the very fucking beginning.

C: Since Eden! She slithered here from Eden just to hide outside his door, and also to go inside his door and drink wine with him and be his best friend forever and ever! Aghhh. God! It's so so so so so so sick. Aziraphale rejects this by like, an obvious lie. And like, it's even obvious to Crowley that it's a lie. Where he goes, "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon. We have nothing whatsoever in common. I don't even like you!" And Crowley goes, "You dooo." Like, man. What is going on in here?

G: "I don't even like you." is truly a line to say there. [both laughing]

C: Like, he's just flopping about for the most puerile, like, insult that he can like, come up with. Like, he's uninviting Crowley from his birthday party! [laughs]

G: Yeah, literally like, [bratty child voice] "I don't even like you! We're not friends anymore!" like a fucking eight-year-old. Like, okay.

C: But like, still, just to say it is still like- it's still something. It's definitely still something. But I'm glad that Crowley, like, is not affected by this obvious lie at all. Like, I'm glad that Crowley has sort of this whole time been the one who has trust in their friendship.

G: Yeah.

C: What with never suspecting Aziraphale lied to them and like, calling him his friend.

G: Also, I like that it's like, "We are not the same," and then the follow-up is, "I don't even like you." as if, like, "We are not the same" can be saved by "Well, but you like me." But like, "No, I don't even like you!" It's so childish, but I get what's going on in his head when he is, I think, trying to convince Crowley and himself that this is how he feels. It's like, in his head, it's like, "We are- friends, we're not friends!" And he's like, "Why are we not friends?" "Because we're an angel and a demon. We have nothing in common." "But you like him!" "I don't even like you!" [both laughing] I can very clearly see the thought process behind this fucking barrage of comments.

C: Yeah, he's just like, desperately trying to burn this bridge in like, the clumsiest way possible, and like, he can't even do it, because, like, he's already like, soaked everything that he's trying to light on fire with, like, the water of how much they are definitely friends who like each other. Also, just the word "friend" in Good Omens in general is so something. 'Cause the thing is, I feel like we didn't even think about it. In Episode 2, like, Aziraphale on the phone calls Crowley his friend. But specifically, he goes like- it's to lie. Like, he goes like, "Oh, I mean, we're friends! Of course if there's anything, I would tell you!" as he like, goes back to perusing Agnes Nutter. And then he wouldn't call Crowley his friend, like, in 1601. So it's just, the way that he- like, they both know it's true, but Aziraphale will just like, add and subtract the label whenever it's the most easy for him. What a guy. What a guy. They're all crazy, I'm crazy, everyone's crazy

Finally, Aziraphale's like, "Also, even if I did know where the Antichrist was, I wouldn't tell you, 'cause [both] we're on opposite sides." And Crowley goes, "We're on our side." And then Aziraphale says, "There isn't an our side, Crowley. [both] Not anymore."

G: Not anymore.

C: "It's over."

G: It's over!

C: This is so Soho where the rejection includes the acknowledgement that something was there at all, you know?

G: Yeah. Like, you can't reject something that wasn't being offered! Like- [pained sounds]

C: Yeah. The scriptbook says, "Crowley takes a deep breath, as if he's going to keep talking, and then he lets it all go." Oh, it's so sad! I'm so sad.

G: Crowley has, you know, the way he says things. He really does like, make a bunch of noises and goes like, "[shaky] Uhh," you know.

C: Yes.

G: Here, he goes like, "Right. Well, then." and then he like, stays there and goes, "Nuh." [laughs] Like, he literally just goes, "Uh." And I love it so much. And he starts walking away.

C: Yeah. He's so clipped on "right" and "well, then." It's like, clearly like, he has to reign himself back at the end of each syllable or else he'll, like, fucking cry or something, or it feels like there's something stuck in her throat. It's very like, agh. God. Like, thank god they have their sunglasses on, [laughs] 'cause like, Jesus fucking Christ. Well, maybe if they didn't have their sunglasses on and Aziraphale could see their big, wet, sad, yellow eyes all the time, this wouldn't have even happened. Have we considered that?

So the first time I watched this scene, I was so confused about Aziraphale's behavior that I went back and rewatched Episodes 1, 2, and then 3  for an Aziraphale-centered rewatch just to try to see if I could understand anything. I think it helped a little bit. But I don't know. Grey, do you feel like you understand what Aziraphale's on about now?

G: Well, I think personally, that, as Will Wood has said, "I've made more mistakes than simple, empty moments / And each one is out of character, as you know I tend to be."

C: You know what? Yeah.

G: I think maybe this is just, when you're in this much distress, the decisions you made that are wrong tend to be so removed from how you would usually act. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. And by him, I mean Neil Gaiman in characterizing Aziraphale. [both laughing]

C: Uh-huh.

-

G: Well, you go to the last scene of this episode, which is, a while ago, we actually see Adam like, reading the magazines, right? And he is talking to his dad about them, but his dad is very dismissive. And he gets quite upset that he's not being taken seriously, so he heads to bed early.

C: There's like, scary music that's like, "Oh, no! What's happening?" music that starts specifically when he says the line about how like, "Oh, there's like, Tibetans in tunnels, and they're spying on everything we do." And his parents suddenly look like, very concerned, and then he goes to bed. [laughing] And they never follow through all this, but it does really feel like a "Oh, no! Is our 11-year-old son going white supremacist mode on YouTube already?"

G: That is- like, that is pretty much the vibe, right?

C: Yeah.

G: It's like, "This kid is being white supremacist," which sure is a way to do it.

G: Anyway, the last magazine he puts down before he goes to actual sleep is one that's about nuclear power. As he goes to sleep, there's very, very ominous music and whispering and all that. And we go to a nuclear power plant, and we find that the nuclear reactor there has stopped working, but the plant is still producing the same amount of power. And, you know, there's like, bureaucracy, blah blah blah, but they eventually open the chamber. And when they do, the nuclear reactor's just not there, and it has been replaced by a lemon drop.

C: Yeah, I will say that on the bureaucracy chain, did you notice the-

G: That's relevant?

C: Well, I mean, yeah. What?

G: That's gonna be relevant, or-

C: Oh, no, it's not gonna be relevant. I just have a comment about the scene where the minister is on the phone, and there's a male sex worker next to him.

G: Oh, yeah.

C: Yeah. I mean, I don't really know what my comment is. I think it's just that- Okay, I mean, okay, like, what happens is like, the people in the nuclear reactor, they're calling up the chain of command for permission to open it up. And it goes to like, a minister, and he's shirtless in bed, and he's like, "You're calling me now?" etc etc, and there is a male sex worker in bed next to him, who's sort of like, tapping his watch with the like, "Hurry up. I'm on the clock." sort of thing. And it is confirmed that this is a sex worker in the script. And okay, like, this is supposed to be like, a funny scene, and I don't think the fact that it's a male sex worker and not like, a female sex worker or whatever is part of the humor. I think the reasoning was probably just like, "Well, we want, like, someone caught in like, an awkward position, and like, doing like, a female sex worker is like, tired. Like, everyone's done it already. So let's just switch it up." But like, I do wish that there were more queer humans in Season 1 or that there were just more people around who were styled the way that this man is. Because, like, he has a very distinctive like, look with like, makeup and hair, and like, cheekbones and things like that- that like, I don't know what my point is. I just wish there were more gay people on the show, and that people on the show looked like, differently rather than just like,

this one person who like, is there to be like, in capital letters, A Gay Person. And Aziraphale and Crowley were canonically queer by this point. and Neil Gaiman was sort of using that label for them a bit after 2019 as well. But, I don't know. It's still a thing to me.

Okay. And then, yeah, we end on like, Adam asleep, and the voices whispering to him are going, "Mend it all, end it all, end it all."

G: Yeah.

-

C: What did we think about this episode?

G: It's fine. [both laughing] Understatement. I mean, I don't- Well, obviously it made me crazy insane. This is for a fact. But many scenes in it- I mean, mostly like, the latter half of the episode, I'm like, "What is going on?" But I don't know. Maybe it will be answered, though, the further we get into the story, but I am very curious about what's gonna happen next.

C: Yeah, yeah. I mean, I also thought, like, first half of this episode, best thing that's ever happened to television. Second half was moving. Had some fun parts. Some of it, quite confusing.

Okay in our wrap-up. First: gayest moment, Grey?

G: I don't even fucking know. [C laughs] Probably the tavern scene. I mean, like, if we're talking like- I don't know. Probably like, the Disney Princess falling in love music scene, right?

C: Yeah. That was that was quite a bit.

G: Truly is.

C: That was Disney Princess falling in love of him.

G: He literally was Disney princess falling in love. Do you have another?

C: I mean, if we're just like, gay moment that resonated with me the most, I think it's the moment that inspired both of our anecdotes-

G: Oh yeah.

C: - where Aziraphale says that Crowley isn't even his friend, he's never even met him. But I don't think that's the gayest moment in my- in my heart I think the gayest moment in my heart is- oh my god.

G: [laughing] It's Shadwell and Crowley. [C laughing]

C: Don't! Ew, god! Sorry forever saying that to you.

C: I was very confused when you did.

C: Yeah, I did notice that you didn't respond to it at all [G laughs], and I was like, "That's fair."

I think that Crowley asking Aziraphale like, "Hey, can I drop you anywhere? Anywhere you like?" was one of the most vulnerable Crowley being in love moments in the flashbacks, like, yeah, he's just- Aziraphale surprised him. And like, he doesn't know how to be her usual cool self. So yeah.

G: Yeah.

C: Okay, transest moment.

G: I mean, Anthony J. Crowley.

C: Yeah, Anthony J. Crowley.

G: Fundamentally, as a person.

C: Yeah. Sorry. I have nothing to say. I'm just staring off into the distance, thinking about them. I mean, I learned how to change your Discord status for the first time ever-

G: Yeah, I know. [laughs]

C: So that I could make it the dialogue, like, "Anthony?" "You don't like it?" "No, no, I didn't say that. I'll get used to it." Like, this is the first time I've ever changed my Discord status, and it is for that. So.

Okay, Grey, hit me with your predictions.

G: Okay. So my predictions are: with the emphasis of not killing Adam, not killing kids situation, I think it's either going to culminate to Aziraphale being just like Heaven and like, giving in to like, killing Adam. And like, by killing, I mean, like, I don't think this kid's gonna die. But like, at least doing something to act on it. And I don't think it will be like, a "Dean Winchester pointing a gun at Jack and not shooting" situation. I think it will be "Sam Winchester pointing that gun at Dean and shooting, but the gun is empty" situation. You know what I mean? Like, I think he will do it, but like, it's not gonna kill the kid.

C: Yeah.

G: Or it may be like, Crowley kills the kid, and again, "kill,: you know. And it's like, you know, it's like a big deal given that he vehemently disagrees with the idea. I think the second one is less likely because the show is very much trying to be like, "But Crowley is good!" you know, and like, killing a kid is is like, gonna throw that off-course. So I'm more leaning into Aziraphale will try to kill this kid, I think.

C: Okay.

G: And my second prediction is- I'm just going to read it. I think maybe they'd meet in the middle eventually and like, leave their alliances and be their own team, but also still attempt to stop the apocalypse. So it's not like they're going to run off together, but they're also gonna stay here and do something, and they're going to be together about it. And like, 'cause, I think like, Aziraphale needs to understand that they are the team, and they are the ones who want the same thing. And Crowley, upon learning about this change, will be like, "Yeah, okay." But also, maybe not. And if maybe not, I think what would happen is Aziraphale just like, wouldn't get that like, this is the thing to do. And in that case, I don't really know how it would go. I have no idea. Like, maybe Crowley would stay and help anyway. 'Cause this situation is really a matter of like, unstoppable force versus immovable object. I think, between them, Aziraphale will be an immovable object, and so Crowley eventually will have to do the stopping. Those are my predictions.

C: Nice. What were your predictions last episode? Did any of them come up?

G: So my predictions at the time were about Anathema like, harming Adam, and then like, Aziraphale and Crowley trying to save this boy. But like, actually, I think it's gonna be the other way around. Like, I think Anathema would take care of this kid. And I talked about like, Anathema and Newton falling in love. Hasn't happened yet. I bet it will. And then, like, I don't know. At some- I said that like, I think Adam wouldn't actually do anything, but like, the apocalypse will still happen, but he won't do anything, which I think has been disproven. Like, maybe he wouldn't do anything, like, do anything, but things are happening directly because of him. So.

C: That's true.

G: Well, rating. Let's rate this episode.

C: First half, 10 out of 10, Second half, 7? 8? Maybe 7.

G: The second half is just so short and so empty of anything that happens.

C: [laughing] It's the same length as the first half.

G: So it's like, it's whatevs,you know what I mean?

C: Mm-hm.

G: I would count them as separate episodes. I think the first half is a 10 out of 10, easily. Like, go higher than 10 kind of rating, you know? But the second half, maybe a 7. It's not that interesting, and the things that are interesting are interesting in that they're very confusing. But they're still interesting, though, so.

C: Yeah, they are still interesting. I guess that would average to me as, like, either an 8 or 9, and I think I'm willing to bump it up to a 9 just because the first half is the most important thing that's ever happened. So yeah.

I guess that is it for this week's episode- second episode. This week's second episode of Rubbish and Probably a Podcast. Next time, we’ll be talking about Season 1, Episode 4: “Saturday Morning Funtime.” Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts.

G: Follow us on social media! We interact through the accounts set up for our Supernatural commentary podcast, Busty Asian Beauties. Catch us on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com and email us at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com.

C: Thanks to everyone who’s donated to our Ko-Fi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod! See you guys next time! [both] Bye!

[theme song]

-

[beep]

C: Yeah.

G: Yeah.

C: Ya.

G: Ya! [laughs]

-

[beep]

G: He's being- I forgot the word. But, you know. They're setting him apart.

C: Ostracized? Or-

G: No.

C: What do you mean? They're being extra surveilly over him, or?

G: I forgot the word!

C: All good.

G: Sad.

C: So, so sad.

G: Saur sad.

C: Saur fucking sad.

-

[beep]

G: Also, I think- fuck! I am so sleepy I'm forgetting everything.

C: Oh no!

G: I was gonna say something that I thought was very poignant. [C laughs]

C: Should I resay all the things I said so you can recreate the thought structure that you had?

G: What was the beginning of the sentence? Of your thing?

C: Blah blah blah, try to fit it into the bandstand, he comes in, the angels never explicitly said that they don't want the war, it's just been heavily implied-

G: Ah, okay!

-

[beep]

C: But how did you feel? [silence] Are you there? Hello?

-

[beep]

C: Hello?

G: Hello? Holy shit.

C: Oh, hi! Where were you?

G: Hi! I'm falling asleep.

C: Oh. Oh. Oh, good.

G: Sorry. How long was I out? Not a lot? A lot?

C: Um, five minutes, not a lot.

G: Okay, that's a lot, though.

[dinitride-art]

I’ve been thinking about rainbows lately. They’re strewn throughout most of Stranger Things, but more so in seasons three and four. We’ve got El’s drawing in Hopper’s cabin, and the Rainbow Room, and Argyle- and so on. Even in Suzie’s house, we have a poster in her room with rainbows on it. These are just off the top of my head, there are a lot more- but that’s not what I’ve been thinking about. It’s been more about rainbows as a symbol. The relevance of rainbows as a symbol for queer identity in Stranger Things is conveyed through it’s genre, the specific time period and our understanding of it, and historical events that occurred after and prior to the show’s setting that have had long-lasting impacts on our society. 

Stranger Things is technically historical fiction. It’s a work of fiction that is set in the past. We have relevant events like the Cold War between the USA and the Soviet Union, the Satanic Panic (D&D and unfounded fear of cults and Satanists), and general exploration of societal values relevant to the 80′s (basically the story is created with the allowed boundaries of normalcy in the time period in mind). This show wasn’t written in the 80′s. That changes how we view and analyze it because while that time period is relevant to the story, the subtext relevant to the viewer will more likely be relevant to our time period. 

Bright colours and questionable fashion choices were very prominent in the 80′s. Rainbows were also wound up in that. If Stranger Things was made in the 80′s, rainbows would be rainbows. But Stranger Things wasn’t made in the 80′s. Readability in visual media is very important. If the audience doesn’t know what’s happening, then something is wrong. Rainbows have come to have an accepted meaning in our current time, that wasn’t really accepted/known outside of queer circles in the 80′s. 

There is a lot of important queer history in the USA in the 80′s. In 1978, “Gilbert Baker, an openly gay man and a drag queen, designed the first rainbow flag. Baker later revealed that he was urged by Harvey Milk, one of the first openly gay elected officials in the U.S., to create a symbol of pride for the gay community,” (Britannica Article). The first gay flag was made right before the 80′s. (There are definitely better sources on this I was just looking for something quickly). However, “It was not until 1994 that the rainbow flag was truly established as the symbol for LGBTQ pride. That year Baker made a mile-long version for the 25th anniversary of the Stonewall riots.” This is after the time that Stranger Things is currently set in. However, Stranger Things is also being written after these events.  

As an audience, we recognize rainbows as a symbol of queer identity in both media and in our actual lives. Stranger Things has to take our current society into account because it has changed since the 80′s and how we interpret certain ideas has changed. The relationship between an audience and a piece of media is interpretation. We need to be able to pick up on what the work is putting down or else it won’t be able to tell a story. 

[danascullyslookbook]

Scully’s Fashion in 1995

Color

The trend that began last year with all of the color draining from Scully’s wardrobe continues in 1995. Thankfully, she is now tending more to ‘traditional business colors’ wearing more navy and black rather than her previous tendencies to beige and tans. Overall, the drain in color can be interpreted in many ways as I have mentioned before such as the loss of innocence and increased experience. One other point that I have yet to mention is her overall look moving more to an executive style of dress, the highest level of business dress. In her experience where the situations she finds herself in becoming increasingly odder, she dresses as professionally as possible to offset the out-there aspects of her cases to ensure people take her seriously.

Fit

This is the first time I have noted a big jump in wardrobe quality. While I analyze style on a year-by-year basis as fashion is typically defined by the year, the beginning of season 3 gives Scully some of the best fitting and well-tailored suits to date.

One trend that has remained from 1994 is the layering. The trench coat became an iconic part of Scully’s wardrobe during this time. It is also most likely a great way to stay warm in the very cold Vancouver DC winters. Scully also is tending more and more toward pantsuits over time, however, some skirts and pencil skirts are occasionally peppered in to keep her wardrobe fresh. The majority of her outfits also include the ever-present ribbed undershirt, however, a few other layered blouses, button-downs, and other shirts are used occasionally.

Casual wear she keeps it comfortable with oversized and soft items. Comfort and functionality above aesthetics here, even though I think all of her casual outfits are amazing.

Accessories

Scully’s most frequent accessories have stayed consistent so much that when accessories such as her necklace are missing, it is usually for a deeper reason. In 1995, we have seen some absolutely iconic extra items such as her fanny pack and the absolutely unit of a bucket of chicken. The accessory with the biggest overall increase in appearances is defiantly her cellphone. No wonder we all know her typical phone greeting by heart, “Mulder it’s me.”

Hair

Scully’s early-season hair is absolutely all over the place. I think this boils down to them not really knowing how to take care of it. Gillian has 2B curly hair. What that means is that while easily straightened or styled, it needs to be treated differently than other hair types, aka don’t brush the heck out of it or use a ton of heat. This leads to the excessive poof that we see frequently throughout. Hot rollers ahoy, defiantly not the best way to keep down the frizz and most likely will absolutely fry out her ends. This is probably why she receives constant haircuts such as the four shown above.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Monday, August 29 - Tuesday, August 30

XANDER: (swallows) People? BUFFY: Xander, you ate the burger?! XANDER: Well, first you say it's cat, then you come in and hand me a burger, blah blah blah, five minutes later 'oh and by the way, it happens to be hot delicious human flesh'! BUFFY: I needed that burger to analyze it. Now I'm gonna have to get another one. XANDER: *That's* your problem with this scenario? You getting seconds?

~~Buffy Season 6 Episode #112: "DoubleMeat Palace"~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Redirected (Buffy, T, SGA xover) by 3am_moonlight

Demonology 101 (Buffy, T, MCU xover) by glitterangelem

Fashion Show & Tell (Dawn, T, LotR xover) by jerseyfabulous

Are These Goons Yours, Mine or Ours? (Buffy, T, SG1 xover) by beri_fanfic

Escape Plan (Joyce, T, Multiple xovers) by acswatwst

Flowers of Life: Valerian (Buffy, T, MCU xover) by mmooch

A Cascade of Echoes: Leaving the Blue Marble (Buffy, T, SG1 xover) by 3am_moonlight

Flying True (Faith, T, Firefly xover) by jedibuttercup

Something Wicked (Buffy, Willow, T, Wandavision xover) by glitterangelem

Mrs. Bruce Wayne (Ensemble, T, DCU xover) by beri_fanfic

The Runaround (Xander, T, Dresden Files xover) by madimpossibledreamer

If it Purrs Like a Kitten (Angel/Spike, M) by Gabriel_Is_My_Guardian_Angel89

An Eye for an Eye Leaves the Whole World Blind (Buffy, Spike, Drusilla, T) by LadyLustful

Season of Rituals (Buffy, unrated, LotR xover) by Liloldme

Buffy Summers and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Cable Bill (Buffy/Spike, T) by ifonlyiwaswittier

Wildfires (Buffy/Spike, E) by cawthraven

Untitled (Buffy, Willow, G) by purrpickle

Untitled (Buffy/Spike, Dawn, unrated) by

Cheese (Buffy/Spike, T) by myrabeth

[Chaptered Fiction]

A Night Without Day - Chapter 10: It’s Got to Be More Than Flesh and Bone (Buffy/Spike, E) by orea_domina

Body Language Chapter 6: Castle (part 1) (Buffy/Faith, E) by explosionshark

Bound Chapter 14 Out For A Walk (Buffy/Spike, M) by spnae

Who Watches the Watchers, Chapter 17-18 (Buffy/Spike, E) by blue_sweater_spike

Willing Slave, Chapter 17 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Sigyn

A Night Without Day, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, E) by HappyWhenItRains

If Only, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, E) by MixSaysRawr

Why Are There 26 Letters?, Chapter 21 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Indi_Shaw

Marriage, Sunnydale-Style, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, M) by scratchmeout

Talkative Minds, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Jws1993

Her Vampire, Chapter 13 (Buffy/Spike, E) by AmyAndrews20

Living is Easy…Being Happy is Hard CH. 20 (Buffy, T, Mercy Thompson xover) by Luna

[Images, Audio & Video]

Manip:Drusilla and Giles () by emmatheslayer

Artwork:Buffy tattoo () by Anya Gladun

Manip:Drusilla and Giles () by emmatheslayer

Artwork:Buffy & Spike () by boopsterliv

Artwork:Spike () by threewordsorless

Artwork:BTVS “Every Outfit” “Angel S1E8 I Will Remember You” Xx () by whatshisfaceblogs

Artwork:Buffy & Faith () by xxacidcloudxx

Artwork:Buffy & Faith (NSFW) by vanitasmorgue

Manip:Cover Art for MEET ME AT MIDNIGHT by Dusty () by l0veisntbrains

[Reviews & Recaps]

We’re Like Sisters, With Really Different Hair (Homecoming) by herinsectreflection

Buffy Rewatch 2k22 3.2 Living Conditions by handsofabitterman

Buffy Rewatch 2k22 4.1 The Freshman by handsofabitterman

[Fandom Discussions]

The insane thing about Buffy confronting Spike as the Buffybot by babygirlgiles

Surprise/Innocence by herinsectreflection

some folks act like tara can do no wrong by buffyandwillow

by

I don’t agree with the idea of The Gift being the last episode by disco-tea

i know crush is supposed to be anti spuffy by smellingwormholes

Top 10 Spuffy fics I’ve read (Aug 2022) by mcgnagallsarmy

a big reason behind my dislike of buffy only saying “i love you” right as spike is sacrificing himself: by silvermars

just thinking about buffy in 2022 by biggestthighestgeminiest

God season 5 is so good by wikiangela

when the monks made Dawn human by simplyaiden-blog

one of the funny similarities between Spike and Dawn by disco-tea

Discussion of 4.21 "Primeval" by TomatoLover97

Fred or Illyria? by Multiple Authors

I’m rewatching Buffy, and I just got back around to What’s My Line. by no-lo-lo

Discussion of The Vampire Slayer #5 - Released 8/31/22 (Boom! Studios) by Buffy Summers

Cliche Arguments by Miss Muffet

Are the comics canon for you? by Joshua

BOOM! The Vampire Slayer # 5 Preview Pages.(spoilers) by BAF

Fic recommendation - In Retrograde by wroth_and-ruin by bespangeled

Angel Season 5 rewatch - #11 Damage continued by Stoney and Nina

Comparing scenes from the unaired pilot with the original Willow (Riff Reagan) against Alyson Hannigan by InfiniteMehdiLove

Why are there only Vampires in sunnydale?(SPOILERS) by Formal_Fix_5190

Upgraded my Buffy model (from Slayerverse animation) - still working out some kinks by tmcarlee

As weak as the initiative plot is, this is one of my favourite moments in the show by tommygun1945

The Pack & Herbert the Pig by nicollexo

Enemies by mushabo0om

I never realized until this moment that Oz's name isn't Oz by Mysterious-Try-4723

"Listening to Fear" is one of the creepiest episodes of the series by jdpm1991

New slayer born as result of previous becoming a slaypire? by Ezekiel_Says_Grace

The Master by chemeli888

Charisma Carpenter! by Formal_Fix_5190

the frat house from “fear itself" by LieTo_me

Theory: Dawn was created by some unknown being as a weapon to destroy all dimensions and existence by iceswordsman

Trying to remember a scene in the later seasons by murdochi

Thoughts On Season 5? by Defvac2

Where can I read or preview the comics? Mainly Season 8 by ginime_

Let's talk about The Master by Mr_McGigglepants

How do you feel about the Angel and Cordy ship? by Almighty_Push91

Soul Searching… by Channon-Yarrow

If they made another Buffy video game by ThatKoffeeBurns

Unpopular opinion: Riley would have been good for Buffy by PecanSama

What would you think about the other male/female friendships if they had become romantic by LightBlueSky55

Commander Buffy and the boycott by icanneverthinkofone1

oldschool fansites? by deadxair

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[jennana501]

A Case for Rexsoka

I’ve been around the block when it comes to ships. I’ve seen people obsess over them, and I too have been driven mad by obsession. I was a hardcore original avatar fan and I was OBSESSED with shipping Toph and Sokka together. Any time they so much as made an interaction I over analyzed it and picked it apart looking for clues that somehow would prove that my hunches were correct. It was because I related with both characters, and I loved their chemistry. I wanted them to have a romantic relationship because it would feel like some sort of personal validation.

I’m an adult now and nothing has changed. But it has been a while since I’ve desperately shipped two characters together that are not obviously romantically involved with one another, or who could be romantic behind the scenes or beyond the story shown.

Until Rex and Ahsoka.

And I’ve seen people be adamantly against it. 

“No no no it’s just a brother/sister relationship.” 

“No it’s gross she is a child”.

And of course being disagreed with on the internet can drive a person crazy, and instead of individually arguing with dozens of people online, I’m making this post once and for all to explain why I think Rex and Ahsoka have romantic feelings for each other. Especially Rex.

The argument I’ve seen, that their deep passion, commitment, love, admiration, and respect for one another (which are all so obvious you’d have to be...silly to not see it) are felt in a platonic fashion. Which, for the first 6 seasons and 8 episodes, I would totally agree.

But then Ahsoka comes back. And let’s face it. She is a woman. Age wise, she’s around 17, but everything from the maturity of her Lekku (which weirdly don’t get all that longer, especially compared to other Tagrutan women) to her poise and confidence, to her prowess as a warrior, a user of the force, and her ability to command soldiers as well as control her emotions points to her being an adult woman. She’s no Snips anymore; she’s no child. She’s grown up. And how her peers react to her illustrates how they now view her as an adult.

First there is Obi-wan. Obi-wan has always been a mentor to her, a sort of second Master. Obi-wan never hesitated to guide and Ahsoka or offer his council. He is proud of her when she succeeds, and will admonish her when she makes mistakes. When she returns and he sees her as a woman, he changes the way he treats her. He acknowledges her maturity by addressing her as an equal. He doesn’t admonish her. Instead he discusses with her, challenging her ideas and letting her offer an argument for them instead of putting them down and telling her how she should think or act. He also comes to her in his time of need, trusting her to help him with Anakin.

Then there is Anakin. We all know of Anisoka shippers, and they are perfectly able to ship and enjoy said ship, but we can all acknowledge that it is a crack pairing with no basis in the canon. Anakin portrays the perfect kind of brotherly love. He is excited to see Ahsoka, and is stunned by her unexpected reappearance. Things are harder for Anakin because he is used to their fun banter and sibling-like companionship. He’s constantly shut down with her business like manner and he struggles with coming to terms with the fact that she isn’t a little kid sister anymore. She is an adult with a mission and a plan. When he looks at her, he is endearing. He loves her. Admires her. And he can’t wait to pick up where they left off. There’s joy and adoration in his face. He is proud of her and what she has become, but he also feels alienated and even hurt because of how her adulthood has changed their dynamic.

Then there is Rex. When he first sees her, he wants nothing more than to reassure her that she still belongs. The clones had accepted her into their family. As far as they were concerned, she was one of them. When he looks at her for the first time, he’s beaming with the same adoration as he had had for her before, but also with a solemn awe at what she has become and what she has grown into. He welcomes her back into his life without hesitation.

But then there is a moment things shift so drastically that I paused the show and re-watched it half a dozen times. We all know it and love it. This face he gives Ahsoka. The Look.

What we see here is something we have never, EVER seen in Rex for 7 whole seasons. And it is my opinion that this is the first time Rex has been able to feel and express that he is attracted to Ahsoka. In other words, Rex has a sexual awakening.

Up until this point, Rex has been a sexless character. Nothing he does is flirtatious, sexy, or at all suggestive that he has those feelings inside him at all. Every sexual being has a moment where they are first animalistically drawn to another being. Characters who have already had this moment are easy to pick out. Obi wan. Anakin. Ventress. These characters have already experienced their sexual awakening. Ahsoka has too. Lux was her first object of attraction.

But Rex has never had this moment. Until this reaction.

I know some of you might be thinking “but Ahsoka gives a very similar look to Anakin, does that mean she is sexually attracted to HIM?” It’s a very good point. Ahsoka and Anakin share some cheeky playful looks during “Old Friends Not Forgotten”. We see many characters give similar looks to other characters, but does this mean it means the same thing as when Rex does it? The short answer is no.

When animators design a character, they establish the “range of emotion” for that character. You can easily see this when you look back at how many times you see Rex break from his stoic, captain’s face. He rarely laughs, smiles, or emotes in any way. This is why when we see him emote it is exciting to us as an audience. A character like Ahsoka or Anakin commonly show a wide variety of expressions. Ahsoka is much more likely to give a cheeky look than Rex is. So “the look” for Rex, means a lot more when he is doing than it does when another character does it, say Fives or even Obi-Wan.

Which means the writers are trying to tell us something about this moment. 

This moment has changed Rex’s and Ahsoka’s relationship. 

Now does this mean that they are going to go bang each other immediately? Does this mean the second they are alone after “Victory and Death” they start an intense, sexual relationship? Of course not. That’s not what this ship is about at this time. But the reason many of us ship it is because suddenly they don’t feel like brother and sister anymore. It isn’t entirely platonic. And the show does a good job to further emphasize this as they come closer and closer both emotionally, and physically during the finale.

Blocking is a huge factor in visual storytelling. During the finale, Rex and Ahsoka are blocked in a way that makes them as close as physically possible on the screen. This communicates to the audience that they are closer now than they have ever been. As Jedi and Clone Trooper. As friends, and as companions, their bond forged in the fires of war, struggling to find meaning in life as soldiers.

In contrast, look how Ahsoka and Anakin are blocked in their scenes. There is nearly always a gap between them, illustrating that they are distanced from each other emotionally. Rex is even visually inserted into the gap between them in several instances. Anakin and Ahsoka are growing apart, but she and Rex are growing closer.

We get to experience Rex and Ahsoka engaging in actions and conversations that we had rarely seen before. From casual banter, to moments of intense intimacy, to emotional peaks, Rex and Ahsoka interact more in these four episodes than in the previous six seasons. Part of this is because their maturity gap has closed. Ahsoka is finally Rex’s equal in experience and maturity. It is also in part because it is a unique dynamic. No Obi-wan. No Anakin. Rex and Ahsoka are equal leaders of the 332nd. There’s also the fact that they are put into life threatening situations and have no one else but each other.

But there is that “look” that is given at the beginning of all this that suggests something else, that as their bond undoubtedly becomes strong as beskar, there is an element of it that takes their relationship from the platonic to the romantic.

I feel every detail, moment, and piece of dialogue in the finale tells the story of this bond. 

Many instances of their strong emotional bond have been spread throughout the internet, with most ready to acknowledge that they have a connection unlike any other, one that may even be described as a “force” connection. These last four episodes are so exciting because we see two friends reunited, but then we get to watch as their relationship transforms.

Even disregarding their implied attraction to each other physically, they dive into each other and hold on tight. Ahsoka shares deep personal worries with Rex, and Rex and her are shown opening up to each other in ways they have never opened up before.

We were all floored and dumbfounded at scenes such as these that show these characters at their most vulnerable. But they decide to be vulnerable together. Is it because they are all that is left of their 501st family? It part, this is definitely true. But by being this vulnerable they transform their relationship into something very different from what they had before. It will never be the same again, and it will be near impossible to back out of the emotional intimacy that these two have participated in. Once you have formed that kind of an attachment with someone, there is no going back, and as is seen in rebels, these two maintain that strong connection even after years of being apart.

This goes beyond their sexual desires or needs. They’ve forged a bond that cannot be broken. They have shared minds, shared pain and agony that only the other can understand. They’ve been isolated from the world, and all they have left is each other.

And at the end of the series, when we have Rex and Ahsoka broken, their world flip upside down and everything they ever valued or cared about lies in ruins before them, the idea that they still have each other is that beautiful seed of hope Star Wars is so good at preserving. Those of us who believe that their relationship could be romantic want good things for Rex and Ahsoka. We want them to have that love and share it with each other. Maybe only for a few moments, but having known it would be better than both of them living and dying without having that experience. 

When we see the two in Rebels, for me it confirms that these two love each other deeply. But their lives can never be lived in a normal fashion. They cannot even be together as partners in life. The Empire has stolen this from them. The tragedy of this ship is that it can never be the way we want it to be. Rex will age and die long before Ahsoka is even halfway through her own life. They cannot live with one another. They cannot wake each morning with each other, at least not at the point we see them in rebels. 

But they continue to love each other. Even over distance, even knowing that mortality will claim them with only a fraction of the memories that they deserve with one another. 

So please, the next time you see some art or a fic, or a post like this, think of what I had to say. Rexsoka is about two adults, their lives destroyed at the hands of Sidious, but in defiance they still forge a bond that he could never break or take from them. And that to me is beautiful and something to celebrate.

Side note: I spent a ton of time making gifs but they never would work and so I had to use screenshots instead :(

EDIT: At the request of the OG poster of a few gifs, I have replaced them have also made some grammatical changes. 

[deans-haunted-baby]

Okay I see there are those who are confused as to why most of us are pissed about 15x19 I will gladly explain in depth:

Let’s start off with our boys Adam Milligan & Michael. These characters have not been seen for 10 fucking years. During that time there were Adam stans like myself campaigning like mad to have him and the infamous archangel return for some much needed closure. We had to content ourselves with headcanons, fanfictions and metas based on what we briefly knew of Adam and Michael as people while they unfairly sat in Hell. You might have seen the “Adam’s Still in Hell” memes that circulated. WE WAITED OVER A DECADE FOR THIS. And finally SPN answers our prayers and returns these boys back into the story for the final season. None of us anticipated what their arc and dynamic would look like. Before we could only imagine who these two characters were/are after having been trapped in a cage so long; what their personalities would be like and if they’d be antagonistic to TFW. 15x08 was a surprise because not only were Adam and Michael likable right out of the gate but the writing for them and their dynamic was damn near flawless! And Jake fucking stole the show he killed it as these two. It’s a crime they were not featured in more episodes because the chemistry between these characters is amazing and they’re played by the same dude.

We were given so much background into both Adam and Michael’s psyches in just a short period of time. Their motivations, interests and how they viewed those that wronged them (like the Winchesters); how Hell affected/changed them both and how they viewed their families. We got to see them banter, cooperate with one another and most importantly their different personalities. With Jake Abel appearing in only a handful of SPN episodes, he still fleshed out Michael and Adam beautifully; giving them layers and complexities that most side-characters (who’ve appeared more times than they have) didn’t. The way Jake played Adam’s anger and resentment towards his brothers was brilliant because it’s more under the surface compared to his angsty teenage self in 5x18. He’d become somewhat restrained, laid-back, gentler and wiser which works because Adam displays traits similar to Sam and Dean. He’s kinder and has a sense of humor but none of that distracts from rational thought as he’s quick to analyze and dissect situations. Man, he would’ve made a great hunter/Men of Letters recruit. We know right off the bat Adam’s pissed at his brothers for abandoning him in a thousand-year-prison-sentence and didn’t lift a finger BUT that ironically doesn’t compromise his willingness to help them unlike his past self in 5x18. Jake gets the point across with this character without saying much and that’s what made him so compelling to watch in this episode.

Now Michael was even more of a mystery onion since he wasn’t onscreen as much as Adam had been in past episodes so Jake got to really build on top of this character. Going from the uptight, cold-blooded merciless celestial warrior/dutiful son of God we saw in 5x22 to someone whom despite his arrogance and regal princely demeanor was very human, intelligent, fair, mindful and compassionate. He trusted Adam and respected his opinions even if he didn’t agree 100%. Whereas most angels take over the vessel completely from their original occupant; Michael chooses to share his vessel with Adam as a mutual agreement which says a lot about who he is. He’s fascinated with humanity and wanted to explore it instead of returning to his throne in the clouds. We know that Michael was created specifically to be Humanity’s protector and guardian of Heaven and Earth so these quirks he’d demonstrated in 15x08 aren’t too far off. He holds a lot of pain inside from his abandonment issues with his father whom he loves to a fault and grief over the death of his brothers. On the surface there’s very much an abused child syndrome thing going on with him though he masks it with a domineering presence. And above all this we saw that he was capable of forgiveness. Whether or not Michael always had these traits inside to begin with, its very evident that his friendship with Adam influenced the person he became post-Hell. And that was someone who, like Castiel, chose to rebel for the sake of free will by aligning himself with the Winchesters after witnessing the evil his father had committed. He actually cared about saving the world. This is what we call character development.

What does 15x19 do? It shits all over that. We don’t get to see Adam and Michael’s dynamic at all; and this was perhaps one of (if not the first) most healthy portrayal of a relationship between an angel and its original vessel occupant in the history of Supernatural. Adam is just killed off-screen Thanos style without so much as one last word and Michael barely reacts like he gives a crap. It was just established to us in 15x08 that he’d developed an emotional bond with Adam through years of inhabiting the same body. He protected Adam while they were trapped together in Hell. They were each other’s only friend and source of comfort. They’d developed a certain co-dependency on each other while respecting one another’s space. They’d both made peace with their joint situation. All they had was each other and the writing in 15x19 basically tells us their relationship meant absolutely NOTHING to Michael based on his OOC actions in this episode. He shows up much darker and shadier now that Adam is gone and its like all those years of friendship, things like that independence, newfound strength and humility he’d gained from living with a human for so long are erased. Michael just reverts back to Chuck’s 5x22 bitchboy persona in the most ridiculous 180 shift I’ve ever seen in my whole damn life. And all because his little brother called him mean names. Pitiful. Just when he lectures Lucifer about standing up for what’s right; he betrays his own words, his allies and the rest of humanity in T-minus 2 minutes. That is total character assassination. Nothing about this motivation makes any sense.

There’s no build up to it, no foreshadowing in 15x08 or throughout 15x19 until they get to the lake. He’s completely deconstructed as a character in this episode and rendered weak. It’s like 15x08 never happened. Stripped of all his development for lousy shock value. Instead utilizing all of what he’d learned through Adam and sticking it to Lucifer by proving he could be more than what Chuck tried to mold him into; Michael becomes just another NPC in the story forfeiting the hero he was. And his reasons for siding with Chuck are never specified. Was it about about saving Adam? Was it about proving something to Lucifer (whom he’d already killed in anti-climatic fashion)? Was it all an act that he was in on with the Winchesters; cause there’s absolutely NO FUCKING WAY they could’ve predicted he’d flip on them like that for their magical plan to work. Not after everything Chuck’s done, killing Adam and Jack and leaving Michael to rot in Hell for eternity. And why would he suddenly go along with destroying the Earth when defeating Chuck would probably get Adam back (if that was his goal) which IT DID not to mention its his sworn duty to freaking protect humanity, hello? So his betrayal meant jack shit in the end as it got him killed by his fucking dad!! He’s brought back into the show only to be ruined forever and killed off in the stupidest fashion.

Moving on.

Jack Kline & Castiel. This iron-clad relationship has been in development for 4 in 1/2 years since before Jack was even born. And next to Adam & Michael its the other most healthy relationship on the show. Castiel, a million year old celestial being, spent the first 9 years of his arc on Supernatural following around the Winchesters, being torn between his loyalty to them and to Heaven. He rebelled when he was supposed to be a straight-by-the-book warrior of God. And he defied every rule in the process even when the odds were stacked against him. There was an endless rinse and repeat cycle of love, loss, betrayal and redemption when it came to his relationship with Sam and Dean. It made his character complex, interesting and layered but it still didn’t give him an arc that was his own. Castiel started out moreso being written as just the Winchester’s angel BFF/side-kick. Until Lucifer got Kelly Kline pregnant in 12x08 then things really took off. Before this, Castiel was a lost soul. His faith was broken, he was depressed, lonely, battered and rundown from years of being conflicted over the other angels and Sam & Dean. He felt he’d lost a sense of self and meaning in his life. And didn’t have a mission. Once he turned on Heaven’s orders, Castiel was a rebel angel without a cause so to speak. But like I said this changes the moment he meets Kelly.

Originally Castiel was suppose to kill Kelly in 12x19 because she was carrying the child of the devil and Nephilim are considered forbidden abominations. Told that if Lucifer’s kid was born he could unleash even more evil into the world. But instead of doing what he thought he should, Castiel decides to runaway with her. Choosing to protect her from all threats (Lucifer, demons, other angels, princes of Hell); this especially included the Winchesters. During this short time-frame the angel develops a strong, emotional bond with Kelly and her unborn son that stretches all the way to the S12 finale; to the point where it actually gave him a power-boost. From the womb, Jack appoints Castiel to be his father and protector and he’s given a glimpse into the child’s destiny that he’ll bring paradise to the world. A prophecy that the writers establish head on. This is an unusual circumstance because right here is where Castiel’s solo arc apart from the Sam & Dean takes shape. The journey of becoming a first time parent and guardian. Its a new kind of independence that for the first time has nothing to do with his friends or his family members/colleagues in the sky. Its his own personal mission that he willingly accepts, the second he connects with Jack from inside Kelly. Castiel immediately falls in love with him, before they even see each other; and adopts the boy devoting himself to keeping him safe. Making a promise to Kelly that would later become a vital plot-point in the seasons to come.  

Castiel literally risks everything (Heaven and Earth) to ensure Jack’s birth and ends up dead by 12x23′s startling conclusion. Leaving the newborn infant Nephilim alone in the care of the Winchesters going into season 13; scared, confused and aged into a seemingly 18 year old boy for his own protection. And Alexander Calvert who is a fantastic addition to the cast really brings something wonderful to this role; he’s like a breath of fresh air and a bright light in the middle of a dark room. Jack’s naïve, innocent and curious about his surroundings but also as Castiel once put it “remarkably intuitive”. Right when he’s introduced his arc is intentionally paralleled with Castiel’s. Their alien-fish-out-of-water beginning is practically identical as is their adorable stoic facial expressions. Like father like son. And this helps because while the angel is currently dead in the beginning of season 13, there’s an empty void he’s left behind. So Jack is kind of his temporary stand-in. Odd enough this type of switcharoo would’ve been considered very controversial but it’s handled quite well. Alex is so likable and charming I almost wish Supernatural had introduced him sooner. I mean I really thought I was looking at Castiel’s actual mini-me and not the son of Satan. But I digress Jack’s story in the first half of this season is pretty much about discovery and reuniting with Castiel. He’s a baby so everything is new to him but he’s also one of the most powerful beings in the universe destined for greatness which makes the Winchesters very nervous.

Jack remembers choosing Castiel as his dad which is why he already feels strongly connected to him. Its a bond so powerful that it actually resurrects Castiel out of the Empty the first time. Something Chuck himself was unable to do (that was until the mess that is 15x19). When they’re finally reunited the payoff comes so naturally. Misha and Alex have such a phenomenal onscreen chemistry starting with that first hug; they really play off one another so well that it doesn’t feel like two angels interacting but a genuine father and son duo. So much of what makes Jack and Castiel’s relationship so relatable, deep and endearing is because of what the actors bring to it. But they’re not just a fascinating relationship, they’re compelling on their own too. Both trying to find their way in the world and within the Winchesters’ lives. Death is no stranger to either of them (tragic being that Jack is only a toddler). They’ve each experienced their own personal pain, traumas, life lessons, mistakes and decisions. The biggest for Castiel would be his deal with the Empty to save Jack in 14x08. While for Jack it was the consequences of said deal that would lose his soul causing him to accidently kill Sam and Dean’s mom in 14x18 as a result (something that Jack struggles with immensely to the brink of depression from so much guilt and regret that he’d rather die). Repercussions that would follow into the shows final season. What’s interesting about this deal though is that Castiel made it on parental instinct alone not as a promise to Kelly. He chose to sacrifice himself for the sake of his son as a selfless act of love and kept it a secret from Sam & Dean until his death in 15x18. That’s the extent how much this child meant to him. The other great thing about their family dynamic is that it parallels nicely with the Winchesters. Castiel and Jack share this unconditional love that can never be broken. its even greater than their ties to the Winchesters themselves just as Sam & Dean’s love for each other is greater than any of their other relationships. They would do anything for each other. Castiel would go to the ends of the earth for the little nougat baby because that’s his son.  

Each time these characters were faced with danger or died, Castiel and Jack were overcome with extreme devastation and distress. That said its not just pain that binds these two its happiness. Jack is the best thing that ever happened to Castiel. Literally becoming a father to that child saved him. It brought him back to life, restored his faith and gave him a sense of self-worth and hope he’d long since abandoned. And for Jack, Castiel is the best dad he’ll ever have! He gave this baby comfort, wisdom, nurturing, strength. Was always there when he needed him whether it was to talk or to have his back. No other person in Jack’s life has ever made such an important impact nor made him feel more safe and loved than Castiel. Even when Jack had done such a horrible thing to Mary alienating himself from his family; it was Castiel’s unyielding devotion to Jack that ended up being his salvation. This was huge because once again he’d chosen over the Winchesters proving that no matter what (whether it be the world ending) his son comes first. So when Castiel’s pact with the Empty finally comes due in 15x18 you’d think it’d have an earth-shattering affect on Jack in 15x19. I mean for the first bit it does...until he becomes God. Then its like to hell with that relationship. Castiel is a complete afterthought to Jack and the rest of TFW in this episode. JACK DOESN’T EVEN GET TO GRIEVE HIM PROPERLY. And he just lost his dad because of a deal he’d made a year ago for him. A DEAL JACK HAS BEEN FUCKING DREADING WHILE HE WAS SOULLESS MIND YOU. And when he finally has the power to bring him back, he doesn’t? Jack just walks around with a conceited smirk on his face, bids Sam and Dean adieu and fucks off. I mean who gives a shit right, its only your dad that you love more than anything. This was extremely OOC given that time in 14x14 Jack nearly lost his shit when Castiel got infected with gorgon poison; the anti-venom wasn’t working so Jack resorts to using his powers putting his soul at risk.

I mean if he was so limited to helping Castiel in the Empty AT LEAST FREAKING CLARIFIY THIS TO THE AUDIENCE. This is not about shipping a certain pairing btw. Jack becoming God is not the issue its his characterization after the fact. His first instinct would’ve been to save his dad above getting in touch with the Earth. Yes we knew this transformation was coming it was foreshowed way back in Season 12. Does that justify bad writing or character assassination?? HELL NO.

This is what I’m talking about, episode 15x19 deliberately butchers these characters and their relationships. It shat all over them. No one is behaving like themselves. The pacing is wonky and inconstant. The script feels like it underwent several rewrites and I swear there were scenes cut out. The acting is off too and maybe the pandemic could be blamed for these things but it ultimately falls on the writer. Buckleming screwed up by showing us they don’t know who the hell these characters are, their motivations nor do they give a rat’s ass. And its noticeable on screen. I’ve known better fanfiction writers for SPN than these guys. It’s like they all came back to work but just didn’t care to put the effort into it. That’s why people like me are upset and we have every freaking right to be. Some of us have been with this series for the entire 15 year run. I at least expect these characters to be handled better and for things to make sense. 15x19 doesn’t and its not satisfying its just a cruel joke. The writers and Dabb should be embarrassed to have put this out there thinking we’d just swallow it and shut up. But far as I’m concerned the only thing this episode serves is to disrespect and ruin everybody while angering long-time fans.

MICHAEL. ADAM MILLIGAN. JACK KLINE AND CASTIEL DESERVED BETTER. And that’s the tea.

[shirophantomvox]

Analyzing Illumi Zoldyck's Character

Chrollo Analysis | Hisoka Analysis | Killua Analysis

What’s up y’all! Sorry for being away for the last few days. I needed a break from social media because I am so tired of seeing toxic, self-righteous people on my TL. Anyway, quite a lot of you liked my posts about analyzing HxH characters and somehow comparing them to VLD characters. Today, I’ll be talking about Illumi Zoldyck and I’ll try to compare him to a Voltron character. I know many people have already analyzed this character before, but it wouldn’t hurt to add to the discussion some years later. If you want me to write about anything else, send me an ask! The formatting of this post may be different than the one I wrote about Hisoka Morrow (click his name to view that post).

HERE WE GO!

In the first season, all of the characters are contestants for the Hunter’s Exam. I say contestants because this is a contest to see who can win without any injuries and can keep up with each host. I forget what number stage they were at, but I do know they were at the stage where each opponent has to fight each other. They are declared the winner if their opponent forfeits or gives up mid-match. (Off-topic, but) I am going, to be honest; Gon was my favorite character but his flaws began to show, annoyed me, and later led to his horrific downfall (based from YouTube clips). He didn’t know when to stop and kept pushing himself over the limit. Anyway, Killua and Gittarackur are set to fight. This is when things take a turn for the worse.

Gittarackur is a form of a disguise for Illumi to mask his identity. His face is long; nearly (and reminds me of) in the shape of a Tiki. His face also reminds me of the Witch Doctor mask from Scooby-Doo and Hell-raiser. He has several pins stuck in his face to maintain the facial features of Gittarackur. On the flip side, if he removes the pins, his biological form is revealed. Once he does this, Killua is nearly paralyzed; he cannot believe his eyes and I’m sure the trauma he endured at home hit him like a sack of rocks. Illumi then tells Killua that he wants him to return home, that he cannot maintain a friendship with Gon, stated that he was going to kill Gon, but realizes that if he does so he will be disqualified and will not obtain his Hunter’s license.

I’m assuming the cops aren’t a thing in this reality and the only way for them to “destroy” under the law is by obtaining the license. What do you think? I rarely see police officers; all I see are the Mafia and every they suck compared to the Zoldyck's and the Phantom Troupe. Shit, it seems like they’re the police but have twisted motives.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a fictional character or not, first impressions matter and he bombed this one...even for a villain.

But you did this for what?

How can you hypnotize (by using Nen) your own brother into killing another opponent because he doesn’t want to become an emotionless zombie like you? At least, that’s my perception. Telling your brother to run every time he faces an opponent that he knows he cannot win against is the sickest shit I’ve ever seen. I know I’m jumping around but another thought popped into my head. As the seasons go on, Illumi expresses an odd way of loving his younger brother and to him, that means to make him suffer in the same way he had to. It seems like Illumi is jealous of Gon in a way. (I’ve seen clips on YouTube) Killua takes Alluka to the hospital to heal Gon. Illumi has stated several times to Hisoka that Killua was hiding rules from him and that he still wanted to get rid of Alluka. Although it is clearly stated why he wanted Alluka gone, I still think that Illumi was jealous of Gon simply because his younger brother preferred to be with a friend instead of him. This is why he emphasizes “You cannot have friends. Either they will betray you or you’ll betray them.”

As I read and watched as the seasons went on, I noticed something about Illumi and his family. We all know that the children were raised by their parents. Specifically, their dad is a trained assassin. I can’t remember but I think Zeno is their grandfather who is also an assassin.

I view him as a character that has suffered from abuse and trauma in order to mold him into an assassin. He is emotionless, doesn’t really care for others, has an odd relationship with Killua that he doesn’t have for his other siblings, and is a hypocrite. Killua can’t be friends with Gon but every time the show cuts to him, he’s with Hisoka? Something is fishy there. Are they more than friends? OK, thanks for coming to my Ted Talk. Here's the physical analysis below.

Face

When masquerading as Gittarackur, his face has several pins in them and his hair is in a rock star form of Mohawk that is purple. I’ll give him 10/10 for uniqueness, yet it still reminded me of Hell Raiser.

I’ve noticed that when he is in public he is in costume. Why doesn’t he reveal himself in public? I’ve researched this and no one could answer this question. My guess is that he is a verified hunter and assassin. How can you carry out your missions if everyone knows what you look like? Without the pins in his face, it reverts back to his natural state. To me, his large eyes and long, shiny black hair are his distinguished features. Although he may be my least favorite character, he does have pretty eyes. Haven’t you all heard of “I got lost in his/her eyes”?

Yeah, that can be said about him. Most definitely. He rarely smiles and when he does, something BAD is going to happen. I saw him laugh crazily once Alluka began the healing process, the Nen (I guess) rose from the hospital and got on him. This scene reminds me of how Haggar reacted once the Komar’s quintessence bounced from Voltron and bounced onto her. Wow, these supernatural abilities make y’all feel that good?

Clothes

Gittarackur and Illumi wear the same clothes, which should be a clear giveaway that they are the same. Illumi wears a neural green short jacket that has yellow pins in them, a light green shirt underneath, and green pants. His shoes remind me of loafers with a heel on them, something my grandmother would wear.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say again, these bad-ass men in this show are very stylish and seem to be in shape more than I am. Although Illumi irks me, his fashion is great and this is why people prefer him to be their favorite character. Shows should always produce characters that are memorable; that is the key to a long-lasting fan base.

In conclusion, this anime (for the most part) has well-rounded characters that make the plot interesting and wanting more.

Illumi and Lotor are somewhat similar. They both grew up in abusive households and lost some sense of sensitivity, common sense, and were often “misguided” by their own selfishness. Illumi wants a better life for Killua by constantly brainwashing him into thinking that he cannot have friends and his can only find happiness through killing. Zarkon raises Lotor to be a prince that shouldn't work with planets and should destroy them. This explains why he used deceased Alteans from the colony, drained their quintessence, and didn't give them a proper burial. Lotor IS just like his father but Killua IS NOT like Illumi. Ironic, huh? As we all know by now, Lotor is the son of Honerva (Haggar) and Zarkon. After the rift accident, he became an emotionless, ruthless monster that colonized and destroyed planets just to gain their quintessence. He taught this to his son and once he was old enough to think for himself, he refused to act in such a way. Although he was exiled and said he wasn’t like Zarkon, he was; but worse. Lotor studied and gained knowledge about Altea and its people while using Allura to gain the secrets of Oriande. I say he used her because he knew from the moment he met her that he was harvesting Altean quintessence. While fighting the white lion, he yelled “Victory or Death” which is a common catchphrase the Galra use when they are in battle. In fact, the Galra have been victims of trauma from Zarkon. Zarkon’s ruthless ways of ruling had no other motive except for obtaining quintessence so he could live forever. Silva’s way of raising his children was done to mold them into assassins. Since he was taught this way he did the same thing to his children. Zarkon, Silva, and Zeno think that their ways of parenting are necessary for survive in life when it doesn’t have to be that way. Illumi and Lotor have experienced this horrific parenting and deal with it in different ways. Illumi is oddly obsessive of his younger brother and Lotor is a fucking liar.

This analysis was fun! Next, I’ll be analyzing Killua and Keith Kogane.

If you’d like to see more posts like this, send me an ASK!

[stellocchia]

Okay, time for another overly long analysis of our favourite green blob with a god complex and traumatized teen!

I will be discussing both the “Trapped in prison with Dream” stream and the “Am I dead?” stream as I think they should be analyzed together, so espect spoilers for those. It also goes without saying that, from here on out, unless stated otherwise, I’ll be talking about the characters and the roleplay only!

So here we go! More under the cut and be advised that this will be a long one!

First of all it’s essential to keep in mind that Dream’s view of his relationship with Tommy is extremely different from Tommy’s. I will be going more into details as the analysis proceeds, but it’s very clear by now that Dream is under the delusion that Tommy’s attachment to him is as strong as his for Tommy. 

We have multiple examples of this, but the strongest one (until the revival stream at least) was back in the season 2 finale when he kept believing that Tommy wouldn’t kill him as he wouldn’t kill Tommy. We also have instances like him saying “exile wasn’t that bad, you had me” and his insistence on them having “so much fun together” that all point to the conclusion of Dream believing their game is played on both side.

Tommy, on the other hand, made it abundantly clear that he despises Dream entirely. He recognizes that Dream actively makes him a worse person when they’re together and he recognizes that he abused and manipulated him along with many others. Tommy doesn’t reciprocate Dream’s obsession in the slightest and actually seems extremely taken aback any time the green man proposes the idea of them being a theme. 

On that last point it’s interesting to notice that the actual idea of them working together (Tommy and Dream vs the world style) is actually something new that Dream introduced with his stay in prison. Proposing they could “escape tigether” when they first ended up stuck there and even more in the two latest streams... Dream’s interpretation of their relationship seems to have shifted from “fated nemesis who have fun together” to “friends”. No, this is not a positive shift, and I’m not framing it as one. Dream’s idea of friendship is as twisted as can be and Tommy has zero say in the matter. 

Now that the introduction is done, let’s get to the actual analysis!

Trapped in prison with Dream

So the stream starts with Tommy trying his best to annoy the Hell out of Dream. Then PussBoy is introduced... 

One thing to point out is that Tommy seems to fear silence and lonliness over everything (as we’ll see proof of later on), so it’s honestly no surprise that he would not be able to bear the silence for too long. 

“The cat is the best thing that’s happened to us” Dream is already sort of shifting from the “me” talk to the “us” talk, which is rather interesting. That also mirrors his “You being stuck here is the best thing that’s happened to me since I got to prison” statement.

Then there is the interaction with Sam where he decided to leave Tommy in there longer in order to solve the issue. We also get a very rare instance of Tommy showing a lot of his vulnerability, talking about exile (though it’s clear he doesn’t know Sam knows as much as he does about exile), which promptly gets ignored in favour of Sam continuing to work on the security issue.

A few seconds after Sam left Dream already burns the new clock. The reason he’s doing it is obviously to keep Tommy in a more vulnerable state of mind by continiously insuring he has no way to tell how much time has passed. All the while acting like it’s no big deal of course. Like his actions aren’t deliberate.

“What if we get out together?” “No, no! Because then you’ll break out with me, I don’t want you to break out with me” Dream already gave a similar proposition when they had just got stuck together and, again, the reason why this is so important, is because it seems to indicate a shift in Dream’s mind between the “me vs you” mentality to the “me and you vs the rest”. 

There is then the whole debacle with PussBoy where he’s killed. There isn’t really much reaction from Dream for it (really, Tommy shows more panic about it then Dream does any emotion. Please people, re-watch that scene and stop using the damn cat as a motivator there). “Look Tommy, I’m gonna get out” is literally his only reaction. That and saying that Tommy is and always has been his motivator: “You motivated me, well, you motivate me all the time”. It really couldn’t be clearer here.

“I’ll get out and, when I do, I’ll get my revenge” (...) “On who” “On everyone who’s wronged me” “Oh on fucking everyone won’t you! You’ll go and you’ll kill fucking... you wouldn’t kill anyone would you? You wouldn’t, you wouldn’t kill someone (long pause)... of course you fucking would...” Now, why did I highlight this whole thing? Well, because there’s a lot to unpack here. 

1) Dream is still fully of the idea that he was in the right, hence his desire to get revenge on “those who wronged him”. His mentality has not shifted at all so we can conclude, once and for all, that his “meek” act during most of the visit was indeed just that: an act. 

2) Callback to Tommy saying he feels like his brain is “wired to be Dream’s friend”, despite having already been killed 2 times by Dream, Tubbo more recently almost dying to him and knowing what he is capable of in general, it still takes him quite a bit to remember that yes, Dream would kill someone, he would hurt people. Tommy still has a hard time admitting to what happened to him and the impact Dream has had on him and he’s not entirely out of Dream’s manipulation (once again, good representation, because you don’t heal from something like that in a month), he is however now better at recognizing it and correcting his own faulty thinking. 

“I have a plan” I did not notice this on first watch, but was Dream’s plan to send Tommy to the afterlife from the start? Or, at least, to send someone there so he could study it? It could very well have been. He’s shown in the next stream that he wanted talk to Schlatt immediately asking Tommy about him once he was back. We can’t however ignore that he mentione that “someone who owes him a favour” may be a part of his escape plan, so that feels rather important for the future once he’ll have brought Willbur back to life. 

So then there is more of fight that start. Dream is getting annoyed at Tommy’s “whining” and tries to make him see things from his perspective (aka “it’s not so bad because we have each other” again with the trying to establish their “friendship”). 

“You don’t have ME, you never have ME, we don’t have each other, alright? I am me and you are this fucking looser who goes around manipulating people and lying to get what he wants” What this is is 2 things: 

1) Tommy recognizing what Dream is trying to do, the subtext of what he’s saying and refuting his claims (hurray for the bit of healing he’s had!)

2) Tommy actually recognizing the possessive side of the claims Dream keeps making. I don’t see this talked about that much, but, to Dream, Tommy is most definitely his propriety, just like Tommy’s disks were Dream’s in his mind (remember that speach? He literally referred to them as “my disks”). I mean, he clearly acts like that’s the case, enphasizing time and time again how he has absolute power over Tommy (I’ll go a bit more into it towards the end of the analysis of the other stream, for now though, keep this in mind)

“Even when I’m in here I’m more powerful then you are when you are outside” back on the theme of Dream’s God Complex I see. He seems to like showing off as often as he can “how powerful he is and how powerless Tommy is” (in Dream’s words from the season 2 finale), though that’s most probably to keep enforcing the dynamic that he already established in exile, the whole thing with Tommy being entirely dependent on Dream. He seems to like that aspect of their dynamic as he has expressed multiple times his appreciation for that specific period of time. 

“If I wanted to, right now, I could just kill you. And the only reason I’m NOT is because of my friends, for Tubbo, because WE need that fucking revive book, alright? That’s the only reason I’m not killing you” well, I mean, we’ve known this for quite a while. The only reason Dream got to keep his last life was because of Tommy’s attachment to his friends. I’ve seen a few people saying that it was specifically to revive Wilbur and, while that may have been an idea at first, by now he had already shown multiple times that that was not the case (even before spending time with him in the afterlife). When he went to “Wilbur’s revival” (the failed one) he showed that he was already incredibly uncertain about wanting Wilbur back (describing him as “not so poggers” in very Tommyinnit fashion). No, the actual reason why he wants the book is most likely because Tubbo is on his last life and we know he can’t live without his best friend. 

“Tommy, I’m never, I am NEVER EVER going to use the revive book to help you or any of your stupid little friends, okay?” So now the question is: was this a lie or a twisted version of the truth?

I’m gonna say the latter and here is why: Dream DID, in fact, revive Tommy. We know this now, it’s canon. But he really didn’t do it FOR Tommy. One thing I want to make clear is this: while Dream may, in fact, consider himself and Tommy “friends” he doesn’t CARE for Tommy himself, not in a way that’s commonly considered as “caring” at the very least. He finds him fun, entertaining and he seems to be rather dependent on him, but NONE of this things equate to caring about HIM. So, now that that’s cleard up, the resons why he revived him in the first place should be rather obvious: 

1) He wanted to see if he could and learn more about his power in general

2) As I said before, there is a degree of dependency Dream has on Tommy. It’s very obvious in the fact that, despite having let go of every other attachment, he doesn’t seem able of letting go of Tommy, not permanently anyway. He seems to actually need to have a degree of control over Tommy at all times

“I will never use the revive book. I will NEVER use it on you, I will never use it on any of your friends, I will never use it to save ANY of you” now THIS one is a straight up lie. What Dream was trying to do here was provoking Tommy enough to see if he’d actually kill Dream or not (which was a useful information for him for later). To see if Tommy could bring himself to do it (he can’t)

“I’ll get out eventually because, either you’ll let me out or... people will be dead” way to be ominous green man! We could assume by this point that his plan to escape may have been along the lines of “getting Techno to repay him by killing one of Tommy’s friends therefore forcing him to let Dream out to bring them back”, or something of the sort.

“This isn’t worse then exile (...) because in exile I thought you had all the power (...) here’s the thing Dream, here’s the thing I know: I don’t think the revive- I- how could I be so fucking...? The revive book Dream, it’s not real is it?” Here is where things start to actually go downhill fast. There is nothing Dream hates more then Tommy questioning his power, there is nothing that makes him angry faster (I’m sure the whole “I don’t give a fuck about Spirit” speach comes to everyone’s mind when I say this, as it should). Dream, as much as he presents himself to be a logical mastermind, is actually very emotional in the way that he is very easily overtaken by anger. He does irrational stuff every time he gets mad, that’s no secret. If he wasn’t already planning to kill Tommy to test his power, this push is what convinced him to do it. Also this is the exact reason why he likes Tommy (weirdly enough, their relationship is so very complicated) in the first place, because he’s the only one who’s constantly questioning him and challenging him. 

As we know the fight escalated and Dream ended up killing Tommy telling him to ask “Schlatt” about the book. Though before that there are quite a few exchanges were Tommy expresses that he thinks Dream is powerless now and was lying about the book all along because that’s generally what he does and Dream keeps insisting that he’s not lying and that Tommy’s life is still in his hands, that he still has all the power (turns out he wasn’t so wrong...). 

Also, last line to analyze from this: “I might as well be a God Tommy! You can’t kill me and I can kill you” pretty sure this is the first time Dream outwardly announces his God Complex and it’s interesting that his idea of power revolves entirely around having power over Tommy specifically. Because, even having power over Tommy’s life he’s still in prison, he stil has no real power of any kind. Everyone on the outside still hates him (aside from the anarchist duo), they still aren’t letting him out. Who comes to see him and what he can keep in his cell is still entirely dependent on Sam and not on him. But the fact that he has power over Tommy is enough to make him a God in Dream’s eyes.

Am I dead?

Fisrst things first, the afterlife part:

It seems that we may be seeing pieces of conversation had at different times. Let me explain myself:

Tommy opens up asking if he’s dead, then he has an interaction with Wilbur that sounds like it could be their first interaction after his Tommy’s death as Wilbur asks how he’s doing. 

We know however that he’s been ther for at least 2 months, probably more considering he seems to have interacted with Schlatt, but Schlatt has been comatose for 3 months. We could then assume that what we see is a sort of very short montage of Tommy’s time in the afterlife.

The next scene we have Tommy asking “How long is left?” (we don’t know what he’s referring to, though it could be to his revival) and Wilbur responds saying that, to the end of the Universe it would be still 8 eons. Then Wilbur asks him to play competitive solitary and they randomly chat for a bit.

New change of topic (probably next scene again) we have Wilbur telling Tommy he’s happy Tommy is there (dead) with him as the tw of them were never good for the server and caused all the problems (which we know to be incorrect, but it was Wilbur’s mentality at the time of his death and it makes sense that he would have kept it). Tommy also has a very clear panic attack which Wilbur generally ignores. Wilbur also says that, if he’s brought back to life, he knows for a fact that the server will be in shambles because, in his words: “I know what I’m like, that’s the issue”. 

Like it or not people Wilbur is most definitely implying that he knows he wasn’t a good person and that he won’t be different when he comes back. Simple as that. It’s also a further confirmation of his self-deprecating nature that brought him to self-destruct in the first place.

There is another pause that we could consider a cut scene and Wilbur is then talking about making a solitaire arena in a couple of months to an exasperated Tommy

Now for the revival itself:

First thing we notice once Tommy is back to life is that he’s most definitely experiencing a sensory overload. He’d gotten used to living in a colorless dimension with almost no sounds (aside from Wilbur’s and Mexican Dream’s voices I’m guessing) and no sense of touch aside from the constant pain that being back on the living plain may be quite ovewhelming for him.

“So what was it like?” Dream doesn’t loose a beat once Tommy is back before starting to ask him questions. He literally sounds like an eager kid who just got a new toy (and I gotta commend cc!Dream for the voice acting here!). The book worked and now he needs to find out exactly to what extent he can use it (the idea of immortality being on his mind as we’ll see later).

“Void, it was dark, it was all dark” “There was Schlatt, there was Mexican Dream” “There’s so many more drugs then just alcohol” “Mexican Dream, he was there, which was confusing, he was loud. And then there was Wilbur...” “(Continuation from below) and then I came out and I was in a long long hole, a tunnel of black and void, not even black just colorless” “When I was there it all felt so real, but so torn apart. It felt like I was in pieces, like I was stomped on” This is our best description of the Afterlife so far. A static void with no colors or viable sensations, with only 3 known residents now that Tommy is not there any longer. A weird reality with a seemingly entirely different set of rules to our own.

“Death felt like my body was taken apart and then put together and then taken apart and put together here. It felt stretched man” “It felt like I was shredded to dust” “No it didn’t feel goo- it felt like I was put through a shredder, but there was no blood, there was no flesh it was just essence, like a powder and I was put through (continues in previous section)” This is Tommy’s complete description of his experience with death and what it felt like. Having to stay for months with this constant sensation it’s really no surprise he would be so hypersensitive to touch.

“Honestly I was kind of scared it wouldn’t work” So, here we got another indication of the fact that, while Dream killed Tommy in rage, having him stay dead was never his intention (despite him claiming he would never use the book on Tommy a couple of days prior). He never intended to severe his last attachment (I’m honestly not sure he even CAN seeing as how dependent he actually seem on Tommy), he literally only killed him because he was mad Tommy would question him and wanted to prove a point, but to prove his point in the first place he needed Tommy back. It’s also probably why he revived him so fast, his weird need to have control over Tommy, which he couldn’t have while Tommy was dead.

Why did he care so much about Tommy not believing him on the book, you may ask? Was it to save his own skin? It’s possible and I think that’s part of it, others being convinced that the only reason they kept Dream alive was a lie could cause his death. The other reason is that he seems, as I said before, to want to shift his and Tommy’s dynamic to an “us vs the world” type of deal, which would require Tommy in particular to believe everything he says.

We can now add being hit at all by Dream to Tommy’s ever growing list of trauma triggers as he seems to have a very vivid recollection of his death by Dream’s hands... also we need to point out their body language in this: Dream is constantly trying to get close to Tommy as much as he’s constantly insisting on getting more information, while Tommy alternates between getting close to Dream and pushing him away (could be he’s both seeking some kind of comfort, but is also very overwhelmed).

“Tell me, one more time: what was it like when you died?” “Did it feel good?” Dream’s insistence and exitment about Tommy’s very obvious extreme distress is honestly concerning, but expected. By now we can safely assume that he doesn’t really have any empathy, I know, bold claim, but is there any evidence to refute it? Any evidence at all? Because, so far, he has shown a distinct lack of empathy in any and all situations...

Another interesting thing was Tommy’s reaction to Dream’s probing questions: while he seemed to get increasingly distressed by them, he kept answering Dream every time with little hesitation only at times adding on things like calling Dream a monster for the way he was treating him. I honestly think this may have been because he was in desperate need of comfort, and having someone to confide into is part of that. And Dream was the only “someone” he had there.

We then get the whole exchange about how time in the Afterlife is different then in the normal plain of existence. I’ve seen people equate 1 day to 1 month, however that’s incorrect. That was Dream’s wrong assumption but, from whet Tommy said, we can guess that it was much more then that. Frist of all, the first month and 18-20 days Schlatt was still awake and he was the one making them keep count. That said, we know Schlatt has been asleep for around 3 months (we don’t know exactly how much as they lost count). Which means that Tommy’s stay in the Afterlife was much more around 5 months then 2, meaning 1 day in the Real World should equate to roughly 2.5 months in the Afterlife give or take. That is, of course, assuming time there moves in a regular way and there is an actual correspondence between Real World time and Afterlife time, which is not a given.

Tommy keeps asking for the people he find reassurance in (at least we can assume so) which, in this case, are: Tubbo, Jack, Phil, Fundy an Sapnap. It’s a pretty weirdly matched group of people but, apparently, they are the ones Tommy seeks out when he’s distressed. It would be interesting to see an analysis of his relationship with each of them, but this one is not about that I’m afraid. 

“Wait shut- shut up! Shut up! Sorry, I’m sorry” Tommy seems to have re-acquired some of his exile mannerism such as being overly apologetic and skittish, together with the lashing out more. None of this are good signs... he had just started healing as well...

“I... I’m a God! I can bring people back to life, I wasn’t even sure that I could, but I can!” Bringing Tommy back to life worsened Dream’s God Complex even further, because now he doesn’t only have power over Tommy, but everyone else as well. And, I mean... at this point he IS basically a God, he’s not even wrong on that. 

“Dream, Dream, listen to me. The things I saw, the things he talked about, the things he said he will and the things he WILL do... do not- promise me, never EVER bring back Wilbur! Please, please, please” In case anyone was wondering this is the exact thing Tommy said on Wilbur. He didn’t say he’s worse then Dream here, but he IS bad news, at least if we trust Tommy on it. Wilbur wasn’t only self-destructive when alive, he was destructive in general. He was dangerous to others as much as he was to himself and he DID hurt people. And this side of him seems to only have been accentuated by death.

 “Do NOT bring back Wilbur. Ever! Promise me you’ll never do that, alright? Dream, Dream, you are nothing, you’re nothing, you’re fine Dream! We can be friends if you don’t bring him back! You’re not even- all the tragedies you’ve done-” and here’s the part that I’m guessing people are interpreting as Tommy saying Wilbur is worst then Dream which is... a fair interpretation actually (considering that Tommy is not a reliable narrator). Now please don’t get me wrong, Alivebur as he was, wasn’t worse then Dream, but he had years in the afterlife to become even more radicalized in his beliefs. There is also the fact that Tommy doesn’t seem to put the harm done against him on the same level as that done against others: Dream has hurt Tommy worse then Wilbur ever did, but Wilbur’s potential harm against others might be greater in Tommy’s mind then Dream’s. That’s the reason why he’s offering something he knows Dream wants, which is his friendship, in order to keep Wilbur from coming back: because he truly doesn’t care about his own wellbeing as long as others are safe. Of course Dream’s response to this is: "It’s not up to you. It’s up to me because I- I have that control” which is very in character for the green blob with a God Complex

“What if, now that we know, we could send you back and you could figure out-” We can see that Dream has an utter fascination with this whole concept and, now that he knows revival works, he has no qualms with sending Tommy back (no matter how obviously traumatic it was for him) to get further information because, guess what? Death is not in any way an escape anymore. He can simply pull Tommy back as he pleases.

There is then the exchange about burning the book, but, as Dream has it memorized, they would need to kill Dream to get rid of the knowledge, but Tommy can’t bring himself to do it because he’s even more terrified of being stuck alone in the cell then he is of Dream bringing Wilbur back. 

“I wanna know about death. We can study it! We can study it together! We can become immortal together!” Again, if there were any doubts on Dream’s constant need of having Tommy under his control, this should dissolve them. There is truly not much more he can do to show how obsessed he is then offering Tommy to be immortals together, especially because we know that the ideal for him would be to have Tommy be completely dependent on him again. To have his favourite puppet under his control for eternity apparently... “I want absolutely fucking nothing to do with you” of course, as we said many times, Tommy doesn’t view their relationship in the same way. Tommy actually hates Dream and truly doesn’t want anything to do with him.

“You owe me your life” “Owe you my life? You beat m-!” Who’d know that Dream had some similar arguments to his apologists huh? But this does show how warped his view of reality is. I mean, he’s fully aware that he beat Tommy to death, but he still think Tommy should be grateful to him for bringing him back. 

“Now you can tell everyone that the book exists, that I'm not a liar!” Dream really went hard with the whole God Complex thing, even going as far as choosing his profet huh? Man’s just on a high horse and will never get down...

“Everyone... is my puppet” Welp, this is the culmination of his God Complex. The realisation that he has absolute power of life and death over everyone else. That he can play with them as he pleases. Also, may I add that, for basically this whole stream, he has used the “soft voice” he tends to do with Tommy whenever he’s trying to get him to comply? Like, I’m mentioining it now because it was particularly obvious in this last exchange, but it’s been there on and off the WHOLE time. 

“You killed me to prove your own point. You could have just showed me! You could have just- this is so evil. This is- this is- this isn’t like before. This isn’t you’ve blown up and- you’ve put me through torture, through pain, to prove a point, that’s fucked! You can’t do that to me... to anyone!” It took almost half an hour but Tommy has finally come to the full realisation of what happened to him, of why it happened and he’s honestly very understandably distraught about it (though it is to be said that it's arguably quite good that he understands that it wasn't okay for him either to be put through that as he tends to downplay his own suffering greatly). He has been through something unimaginable for us because Dream was upset that he didn’t believe him about the book. That’s all there was to it, that’s all the reason for his suffering. Like, he’s not wrong at all when he describes Dream as a monster, that’s literally the only accurate description of him. No normal person would put someone else through this for such a petty reason. 

“You’re soft Dream, you’re soft” Another valid point by Tommy. While Dream IS undoubtedly extremely powerful and extremely clever, he’s also petty, stubborn and childish. He throws violent temper tanrtums every time someone (especially Tommy) disagrees with him and mostly gets away with his bs because he has the power to back them up. That said he hardly ever lost, the only true loss he had was being locked in prison, and he managed to turn even that in his favour! But that’s the think: loosing makes you stronger, it often teaches you a lot and pushes you to get better. He (along with a couple of others) basically never had that. Tommy’s been through literal Hell and he survived that, he knows he can survive that. Dream? He may break at the first real hardship as far as we know!

“I’ll let you free, I’ll let you free alright? We’ll call for Sam, we’ll get him in here, he’ll let you out, but... I’m gonna bring back Wilbur and Wilbur- Wilbur is gonna help me escape” 2 things to unpack here (aside from the fact that he’s using the “soft voice” to say something extremely disturbing again):

1) Dream is, once again asserting his power over Tommy in two ways: by frasing it in a way that implies that it’s up to Dream wether Tommy leaves or not and by confirming again that Wilbur’s resurrection is entirely up to him and that Tommy’s opinion on the matter is utterly worthless

2) He fully intends to use Wilbur as a puppet as well because, as he says a bit later, if he brings him back then Wilbur will be indebted to him

And that’s how it’s concluded! 

My closing thoughts on this are that, generally, Dream’s level of dependence on Tommy seems to worsen as fast as his God Complex. man went from telling him that their story “would never be over” to offering him immortality in the span of little over a month. Tommy is Not Doing Good, AT ALL, but I’m hoping he’ll ask for help this time from other people because he literally cannot deal with this on his own. Wilbur will not be good news, but what he’ll do is still entirely uncertain, it is to be pointed out however that, at the beginning, his frasing at a certain point sounded scarily similar to Dream’s idea of “us vs the world” when he said that him and Tommy specifically are the single cause of conflict. I hope I’m wrong there because the LAST thing Tommy needs is another obsessive God-like individual in his life!

@mysweatymakerstudentworld

[meanautisticenbian]

Lilith Clawthorne has Borderline Personality Disorder: an essay

Content warnings: mentions of abuse, cults, and self harm

I don't have much of an intro but I need to get some things out of the way. 

First off, this is an essay that I made mostly for fun and because I feel like more people need to hear about this. I am not excusing Lilith's actions in any way, though hopefully this may explain some of them. 

Secondly, as you might know I have BPD myself. I'm self diagnosed yes, but I still have enough symptoms. I see a lot of myself in Lilith, as well as several traits, and I hope that this essay will be informative.

With all that being said, let's get into the analysis starting with the symptoms that are only hinted at. One of the hallmarks of Borderline Personality Disorder is an intense fear of abandonment, which Lilith seems to display disgusted as her desire to cure Eda's curse. If it's not clear enough, Eda's really the only thing Lilith cares about, which makes sense since she's clearly the only thing she has. We know that she isn't super close to Amity, despite what fans want to believe, we don't know if she's formed any positive relationships with anyone in the Emperor's Coven and it would say a lot of she didn't. With all that in mind, she is clearly very close to Eda and whenever she tries to get away from her, Lilith is always either pissed off or saddened. Sure, this could just be because she wants to heal Eda's curse and is most likely being punished by Belos, and that's why this is listed as something that's hinted at. Then again, Catra from She Ra is BPD coded as well and she mostly wanted to bring Adora back to the Horde because Shadow Weaver wanted her and was an abusive piece of shit, but it was pretty obvious that she also just wanted her crush and only friend back, so I don't see how this can't be applied to Lilith as well.

Lilith seems to have a black–and–white view on the people around her and maybe even herself. Whenever Eda escapes her, she suddenly flips from being loving and caring to her and really acting like she cares about her to treating her like she just pissed on her waffles. Her way of viewing other people (mostly Eda) is another symptom of BPD, being a black–and–white view on everything and rapid changes in self image and views of everyone else. One moment she views Eda as a beautiful and loving sister, the next she's just an old woman slowing her down. One moment Belos is a trustworthy leader, next he's a monstrous tyrant. One moment Luz is an annoying child she can use as bait, next she's her only hope in saving Eda.

She seems to harbor some of these feelings to herself as well. One moment she acts like she's fully aware of the baddie she is, and next she seems to hate herself. Another valid explanation is that this could also be viewed as her hiding her insecurities since she is clearly one to hold back those emotions and she only ever seems to let Eda see this side of her (save for Luz in the season 1 finale) but this is still a common BPD trait that seems to fit her so it would make sense.

Now let's move on to the more explicit symptoms. If it's not obvious enough, Lilith has some major anger issues. She was ready to kill Eda after she did as much as annoy her in Covention and tell her how worthless her life is after she (actually Luz) escapes her in Once Upon a Swamp. It was certainly reasonable for her to be upset about Luz accidentally blowing up the side of a building, but she had a worse outburst over her sister rhyming.

Now we move on to what I think is her most obvious trait: her impulsiveness. Like I said before, Lilith tends to have sudden violent outbursts and act without thinking. It doesn't excuse anything she's done but it certainly does explain a LOT.

It could be a possible explanation for why her first instinct was to use Luz as a human shield while she was fighting Eda and threw Luz off a cliff in order to get Eda to use all her magic instead of making a new bubble for Luz or doing literally anything that WOULDN'T harm Luz. This could maybe (key word) also provide an explanation for why she cursed Eda instead of going and talking to her (assuming she didn't), but her disorder seems to stem more from trauma than it does genetics, both of which are ways BPD can manifest.

Mood swings are another symptom she definitely has, but that can easily be paired with the point about her changes in self image and how she views others, as well as the points about her anger and impulsivity, so I won't go into detail about that.

Depression, guilt, and ongoing feelings of emptiness are obvious traits that don't need much explaining.

The last major trait wanna bring up is self harm and self destructive and suicidal behavior. I couldn't really find any point in which she showed any suicidal tendencies or urges to hurt herself and it is most likely that she won't be showing those traits at any point in the future, though I do believe it is possible that the show may depict self destructive behaviors in her. Obviously, she wouldn't be shown cutting or burning herself, but maybe it could be displayed in a more PG fashion such as her not taking proper care of herself or having risky behaviors.

There are nine main traits of BPD and one needs to have at least five of them to get a diagnosis. Lilith seems to exhibit six and possibly seven of these traits. I could end it here by saying that Lilith definitely has BPD and needs a hug, but we're not done yet.

Despite what most people might say about borderline people and how we're depicted, we're more likely to be victims of abuse than we are abusers. Most of the time the trauma from the abuse is the cause of the disorder, for those who don't inherit it. Many people with the disorder have claimed to have been physically, sexually, psychologically or emotionally abused or neglected during their lifetime. We don't know the exact details of Lilith's time in the coven or what it was like for her, all we know is that it was basically a cult and she definitely experienced some form of abuse. We know that emotional and psychological abuse were definitely present in her and Belos's relationship, and there is definitely a possibility that there was some physical abuse as well. As for neglect, there isn't really anything that can support the claim even if it seems plausible, and logically speaking, she most likely wasn't sexually abused simply just because this is a family show, so unless Disney is ok with Dana going THERE, that one's a little too far out of the realm of possibility.

So, where does that leave us? Well if I'm being honest, she definitely seems to have a case of untreated and probably undiagnosed BPD caused by a series of traumatic events. And the thing is, she's only in 6/19 episodes in the series so far, and we've probably only really seen the tip of the iceberg. She could have a lot more going on with her that we will definitely see in season 2, I highly doubt she won't.

Lilith is definitely BPD coded, and whether the rep is intentional or not, it's still something I can consider good rep. It's super rare that you find borderline characters in the media that are not abusers, manipulators, or terrible, irredeemable people in general. Lilith is not a bad person whatsoever, and even if she's not much of a good person either, she's not irredeemable. She certainly has a long way to go, but with proper guidance and psychological help, she will get there eventually.

I would like to finish this off by saying I'm not trying to excuse or condone her actions, I am simply addressing how it's possible for her to be borderline, based on what screen time she has and my own experiences. I just want to express my appreciation for what rep we have, as well as analyzing her character a bit.

Thank you all for reading

- Sunny