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Episode 109 Transcript: It’s Okay To Be Gay As Long As You’re Straight

[intro guitar music]

G: Hello, it's Grey.

C: Hello, it's Crystal.

G: And this is Busty Asian Beauties, a Supernatural commentary podcast where I, someone who has seen this show many times...

C: And I, somebody who only knows about the show through social media, discuss every single episode of Supernatural from start to finish. Also, we are both Asian.

G: Both Asian! For today's episode, we will be discussing Season 6, Episode 5: "Live Free or Twi-hard," written by Brett Matthews [C: New writer.], directed by Rod Hardy [both] new director. Yes, I think so, unless that's not true. Yeah, Rod Hardy only directed this.

C: Does he have any history with vampire media? Did they bring him on specifically for that?

G: Okay, let's actually check. Brett Matthews wrote three episodes, all in Season 6.

C: Yeah, and then he was gone forever. Thank god!

G: Unless he died.

C: Oh, well.

G: Rod Hardy [C: Also gone forever] was born in 1949. This dude's old as fuck. Is he dead? I'm so sorry if you are, bro.

C: His last work was in 2019. It's possible.

G: Yeah, okay. He had two wins and one nomination. [C: For?] He won the Grand Prize for Thirst in the Avoriaz Fantastic film festival. No, he was a nominee for the Grand Prize. Which seems vampirey.

C: Yeah, I believe it.

G: "The descendant of Elizabeth Bathory is abducted by a cult of blood-drinking, self-proclaimed supermen who want her to join them."

C: Slay? Not really.

G: That's it. [laughs] [both] For this episode-

C: - of Busty Asian Beauties. Next week, we'll be discussing something that hopefully doesn't have teenage sex slaves?

G: Yeah, well, this episode does have teenage sex slaves.

C: Lovely. Well, what did I know?

G: Okay, yeah, let's start with, what did you know about this episode?

C: That Dean gets bitten by a vampire, and then at some point, he almost bites Ben. That's about it.

G: Yeah. Did you know about the Twilight shit?

C: I mean, I knew that there would be Twilight parody content, but I didn't really know what direction it would take.

G: I'm actually quite impressed that they namedropped like, everything and everyone.

C: Kristen, Robert...

G: I remembered the Slenderman episode of Supernatural is called "Thinman," and this one is literally just, they just say "Lautner" at some point. That's fun! The rest of the episode is not particularly fun.

C: Oh, wait! "Thinman" is a Slenderman parody?

G: I think so!

C: I never put that together. There is a hashtag. That makes sense.

G: Yeah, #THINMAN. Well, yeah, I suppose we should start this damn episode. But before we do, I have a promotion to make!

C: [laughs] Yay!

G: So I have started a- No, the thing is, it is colloquially called "knitting podcast," but that does, I feel, send the wrong message when you say it like that to people who are not aware of what a knitting podcast is. But I have a YouTube channel where I talk about my knitting. If you want to listen to me- Oh, god! This is so embarrassing! [laughs]

C: No! It's good! I mean, I wouldn't know because I haven't watched any of it, [G: Literally.] but it's good! You should promote it.

G: Oh, Danica, our past guest, has watched some of it, I think, like the two episodes that are out. And she did say that they're not particularly like friendly if you don't know anything about knitting. [C: Glowing review.] She said she understood nothing from it, so like, yeah. [both laugh]

C: If you want to watch something that's not particularly friendly to people who don't understand knitting so that you won't understand any of it, go to greyknits!

G: Oh, yeah, we're gonna put the link in the description or something. It's called greyknits, I think. It is. It's called greyknits. I think it's @greyknits on YouTube. [C: Hell yeah!] Also, it's called a podcast. But like, basically, it's a vlog where I sit down and talk about what I have made the past two weeks or something. My face is gonna be on it, so I don't know, heads up. Don't click on the link if you don't want to see my face. I know I personally don't like knowing what the podcasters I listen to, what they look like. I don't like that.

C: Like, they're ugly?

G: I mean, yeah, but I'm handsome, so you don't need to worry about that. [C laughs] But also, I just personally don't like having a face associated with the voice. So if you are like that, don't click on it. Don't listen to it. I'll survive. [C laughs] But if you want to see my beautiful face, well, you will.

C: Yeah, and your beautiful knits. [G: Yeah!] The reason I haven't watched any of it is because the two videos are things that are meant for me as a surprise, so-

G: Yeah, Crystal is not allowed.

C: - I can't watch, not because I'm not interested.

G: And Crystal saw it anyway, due to-

C: Yeah, it showed up on my YouTube recommendeds, even though it has like, 3 views or something? [G laughs] How many does it have?

G: It doesn't have 3 views. You're so mean to me. It has like, 26.

C: I'm sorry! It has a million.

C: Okay, well, that's it. This is like a passion project for me. Like, I love to do it, and I love knitting. I think, as is obvious from previous times I've talked about it in this podcast, and I'm really glad to be doing it! And I wanted to do it for a long time. It's just that I didn't have a phone before. I don't have any camera to speak of, so like, I was just like, I couldn't do it. I don't even have pictures of my past knits. Isn't that so sad? [C: That is sad.] Yeah, now I have an iPhone 13, and I'm living my best life. [C: So true.] Yay! Okay, well, let's start doing the episode, I guess.

C: Okay.

-

G: We start the "Then" sequence. Vampires. We're doing vampires. We see some of Gordon. I think we start with Gordon. [C: We do.] Gordon turning, and like, I think it's because we see Dean turn and how that affects his body. It is quite frustrating that when Dean turns, it's like, they do it for like half a second, and then for the rest of the episode, they were like, "We don't give a shit about like, how Dean is tempted to feed."

C: Yeah, the sensory stuff. And also, yeah, how Dean was tempted to feed.

G: I do think it's fascinating that what they do is like, when he's "outside," quote-unquote, with like, Sam and Lisa, they really make a point to make it like, "Oh, he's like a fucking monster now" or whatever. And then he goes into the monster lair, like the place where the vampires are in, and then suddenly, he's just regular schmegular hunter with no vampire instincts whatsoever. We don't even get a point where he's like, "Ugh, they're offering me blood, and I want it so bad. But I'm going to control myself."

C: We do.

G: We don't. He just stands there, and he's like, "No, I already fed."

C: I think he has some lingering looks at the blood bag. I think that you're right that they could have played it up some more.

G: Yeah, it's just, I think, frustrating that they really toned it down for that part. And it's like, it was obvious because they're trying to differentiate Dean from the actual monsters. But it's still annoying. Annoying me. [C: Yeah.] It's just all this vampire stuff, and then we go to a bar, and it's like a place where goths are hanging out, I suppose.

C: Yeah. It's called The Black Rose.

G: Yeah. And we have, like, a bartender asking someone for their ID, and the ID that is shown is this person called Emily Fang, and it's like, obviously not her. [both] And she's Asian! [C: Yay!] Yeah, but this is just for the ID. When the ID is put down, you see that it's like a completely different girl that is showing this ID.

C: Yeah, and white.

G: Yeah. I'm not sure she's white. Is she white? Her dad is white.

C: Yeah, that's true. I guess the actress might not be white, but she looks pretty white.

G: Yeah, she looks not like the ID photo.

C: Yeah, I mean, she looks like Bella Twilight. She's wearing flannel.

G: Oh, yeah. And they do the thing where like, she's named Kristen, like Kristen Stewart. And anyway, she's looking around, and she's like, super anxious, or whatever. And then she stumbles- like she tries- She's like, "Ugh, this guy's not gonna show up." She heads out. And then she stumbles upon a guy, and we realize that this is like the guy that she was supposed to meet all along, and his name is Robert. [laughs] Corny as fuck! It's so corny. Hate them. Anyway, they're really playing up the like, "Oh, you wrote poems for me, and that really showed me who you are. I know you, Kristen." Like, it's a whole fucking thing. And then Kristen gets a paper cut, and then that sends Robert into a haze where he's like, "I can't do this. I need to be away from you!" But then he comes back, and he's like, "Wow. I can't stop myself, whatever. I want you to know who I really am." And then he lifts his gums, and we see his fang.

C: Yeah, I mean, it's also at this point where Kristen reveals that she's 17 years old. [G: Oh, yeah.] She says, you know, "I can make my own decisions. I'm 17!" Ugh.

G: They start heading out because Robert is going to show her where he's from or whatever, his place.

C: I mean, she know that he's going to turn her into a vampire, but she asks if it's going to hurt. That's the plan, where they're going.

G: So they start heading out, and I do think it is a fun directorial choice to have it that the bar is like this, intense, whatever situation, and then they head out, and it's literally just a street in a Supernatural episode. [laughs] And yeah, Robert- like, at some point, Kristen asked like, "Oh, is this the place? Why does it smell like piss?" And then she gets jumped by some other guy, and then we don't know what happens to her until later.

C: Yeah. The other guy's also a vampire, to be clear.

G: Yeah.

-

C: Dean's now on the phone with Lisa, and we do see a bit of her, but I guess not too much about how she's feeling.

G: Yeah. She looks good. [laughs] [C: Yes.] Love her little flannel situation. She looks great in it!

C: So Dean's about a night's drive away from her, and he's gonna wrap things up and then maybe go home. And Lisa's really happy about it. She says that she can't wait to see him, and this phone thing's getting old, be careful. And Sam comes up to Dean and is like, "Wow! Why are you so happy? Boo! And also, here's our case, which is that there have been six girls missing in seven days, and they're all about the same age." And he's showing Dean pictures, and pedophilia Dean is back, everybody! [G: Ugh.] 'Cause he goes, "And cute!" And Sam scoffs, and Dean says, "Ice cream comes in a lot of flavors." What does that mean?

G: I don't know. I truly have no idea.

C: Okay. 'Cause I think what Sam says later is like, "These girls are-" well, what Sam says is, "Sure. Half a dozen girls, late teens, a shower away from greatness." So is Sam's scoff just like, "They're not that hot 'cause their hair is greasy"? [laughs] And Dean's like, "It's okay to like girls with greasy hair, Sam." and neither of them are engaging with the pedophilia thing?

G: Wait! I- [laughs] I did not even realize that that's what he meant by a shower away from greatness.

C: I think it's because they're like, emo/goth girls, right? And that subculture has an idea where people's hair is greasy? So I think that's what he meant.

G: Or like, maybe, perhaps that they're wearing eyeliner.

C: Maybe? Sure.

G: I don't know. Something. I didn't really think about it. I was just like, "Ugh!"

C: I guess his soul prevents him thinking pedophilia is okay. Good to know. Sam says that a seventh girl went missing today, so they go over to Kristen's house to talk to her dad, who's a single father just like Bella from Twilight's father. He just says that he tried to be a good parent, but girls specifically are hard to raise, I guess. And they go and inspect her room, and it's like, a whole thing. Dean turns on the light, and then the camera just- I don't know. It just goes around, showing various aspects of the room where the walls are blood-red, and there's like, hot vampire posters on every single surface, and like, goth accessories, and all of that.

C: People who are comfortable being in a room that their parents can see and having people that are the objects of their affection up on the walls are so brave and not Catholic. Like, good for them! [laughs]

C: Yeah, no, truly, good for them. And good for her for having a themed bedroom in general. [G: Honestly.] I feel like every kid wants a themed bedroom.

G: You need to put an effort to paint those goddamn walls. You need to do things for that to happen.

C: Yeah, yeah, it was definitely a whole project, and I'm sure she was really happy at the end of it. And Dean goes, "Oh. This is like, horrible! I fucking hate this. This sucks!"

G: They are- the haterism is like- Where is it coming from? At some point, Dean says, "Oh, these are not vampires. These are like, heart-throb [both] douchebags" or whatever. So like, is the point that it they're romanticizing an inaccurate version of the vampire? [laughs]

C: Yeah, they're like, "They're romanticizing an evil monster that we love killing." It's like, I don't know, how in Season 1 or something, he was like, really mean to some teens who watched horror movies and were in a situation because of it or something, right?

G: That one, actually, he was like, "Didn't you watch a horror movie? [C: Oh.] If they say turn around, then turn around." So he's actually on this side of the horror movie.

C: So he's on the side of horror movies for men-

G: But not on the side of horror movies for the girlies, yeah. I mean, I don't like Twilight, so I don't really feel obliged to-

C: Yeah, defend it or its fans.

G: Yeah. But like, I do understand that the hatred in this episode, specifically, towards it, is like, rooted in misogyny, [laughs] so like, I feel a little bit uneasy about it.

C: Yeah, they're not like, "The portrayal of werewolves is racist!" Yeah. They're like, "Teenage girls having sexual desires is stupid-"

G: "Girls like it!"

C: "- and it's their fault that they're in this situation now." And like, I don't think they're like a hundred percent on the victim-blaming train or whatever, but there is like a bit of like, "And this is what happens when you romanticize monsters." [G: Yeah.] Which, yeah, seems pretty gross to me as a way to approach this storyline.

G: And I think that that kind of perspective that this episode is peddling is a lot obvious in the line earlier when the girl goes- when Kristen goes, like, "I can make my own decisions. I'm 17!" Because you're supposed to go, "Oh, she's so stupid!" in that part. [C: Right.] And like, I don't know. I don't know. Supernatural hates women. [laughs] [C: Yeah.] And they hate girls, too. Who would have thunk?

C: Yeah. 'Cause this is directly an episode about sexual predation. [G: Yeah.] And they spend, I'd say, equal amounts of time mocking the girls as they do going, "These guys are kind of mean!" So. [laughs]

G: I would say they spend more time going, "Oh, these girls are so stupid for going to these bars and being turned into vampire sex slaves at 17 years old!" than they do being like, "Oh, yeah, these vampires that are doing this are evil."

C: Yeah, I mean, Dean kills all of them indiscriminately. [G: Yeah.] Kills the girls first! [both laugh]

C: They're laid out for Sam and Samuel to find like a fucking- those boxes that you open before Christmas. [C: What are you talking about?] Advent calendars.

C: Oh, yeah. Those. Sam finds a red laptop under a pillow, and when he opens it makes a screaming noise, and a picture of a brooding vampire pops up, like, staring at them. [G: Love it.] I love it! Yeah, I love people who customize little things like that. Like, it takes work. [G: Yeah.] Later, when he gets the password in, there's a scream every time. [G: Where it's wrong, yeah.] She has to learn a good amount about like computer settings or programming to do that, and I love it.

G: Yeah. It's the same way that a lot of people, their first endeavor into coding is like, customizing their Tumblr account. [laughs]

C: Yeah, no, that was me. I had a fucking playlist that would just automatically go on whenever someone went on the blog. I think I tried to change what people's mouse cursors looked like. [G: Literally.] Annoying as fuck.

G: And that's so important.

C: Dean goes, "What's he so bummed out about?" even though that vampire is making Dean's resting face. [both laugh]

G: Literally! That's literally his face. Dean, that's your face!

C: It really, really is. Sam's testing a bunch of passwords, all of them titlecase.

G: Sam is like, "I'm gonna figure out the password of this thing," and then [laughs] he looks at the laptop, and he does his face where he's like, in deep concentration. [laughs] And then he types "Dracula," capital D, and it's wrong, [both laughing] and it's the funniest fucking thing in the world. God, love it!

C: Yeah. And also, Dracula is not a particularly sexy vampire in his portrayal, so no wonder it didn't work.

G: Sam is so far away from what the perception of vampire is by this teenage girl.

C: Dean saves a poster of a vampire watching some girls sleep, and he calls it rapey, which, yeah.

G: It's a book cover, yeah.

C: And then he starts reading a passage from the book, mocking it. So yeah, again, it's like, "It's so stupid that this girl is into this book where the guy is rapey" instead of like, "Well, this is concerning that like, this has like, made her easier to prey upon" or whatever. I don't know. It's just the direction they go.

G: "It's so stupid that she likes it!" Like, okay, Dean, you're also, number one, a creep. Like, let's be completely fucking honest.

C: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah. So Sam is failing at passwords. Dean tells him to try "Lautner" and then "Pattinson," and that last one works.

G: Sam's like, "How do you know that guy? I can't believe you know that guy, and he's a werewolf, Dean!" [C laughs] And it's like, what were you doing at the devil's sacrament? [C laughing]

C: Yeah. But also, I think this is the thing where like, if you're parodying something, don't have the actual property exist in the universe.

G: Yeah, but it's like the actual property for here. Or I mean, it's not because the book is a different name, but like, you know what I mean?

C: Yeah, but the vampire's name is Robert. Maybe the Pattinson in My Summer Blood is named George Pattinson, I guess. [laughs] We don't know.

G: Literally.

C: Sam starts looking through a forum that Kristen posts on, and her inbox has some guy who claims to be a real vampire. And he's just saying stuff about how he doesn't trust himself with her, but she should meet him at night at The Black Rose. And they just discuss like, is it just a pervert, or is it a fucking real vampire? And Sam's like, "Well, probably a real vampire. And like, these people are pretty easy prey." And yeah, so they decide to head there. Meanwhile, there's a very brief scene where a bunch of vampires in a van jump out and mug the driver of a- I don't know.

G: Blood bag?

C: Blood donation drive van, and then they take all the blood in the back. And they pan over the van in case we don't know what the fuck this van is. We do. Later, when Benny comes back from purgatory, he says that he tried just going off of blood donation bags, but then, he eventually ended up feeding on a person. In a cut scene, right? [G: Yeah.] Was he doing it like this, or did he just steal directly from the hospital or-? Well, I don't know. We'll get to it in Season 8. I just think it's fun that Supernatural was like, "We're gonna make sure they kill a guy while doing it so you really know it's bad." [laughs]

-

G: Well, Sam calls Samuel, and he's like, "Oh, Samuel, what is all this, then?" And Samuel says, "We are sure that it's vampires because the blood van and also the everything." And Sam says like, "Why are they still getting people if they're already getting the blood from the blood bank?" And Samuel just goes like, "Well, that's what you're here to figure out." Sam and Dean go to the bar, and they're sitting around watching all these people getting it on, and they kind of see that there's some people who look younger, so they're keeping their eyes on them, and then one of them is a straight couple, and they're like, "Oh, that one, that they look suspicious." And then they're like, keeping their eye on these people, and then another guy comes in and then goes up to the guy, and then he turns around and gives the guy a kiss, and Sam and Dean [C: Yay!] go, "[gasp]" I mean, they don't. They really-

C: Dean looks disgusted. [both laugh]

G: Well, homophobia win!

C: Homophobia win

G: We haven't had a homophobia point in a while, I think. [C: Yeah.] And now we do. Actually, that's a lie. We did have a homophobia point last week, and the week before, and the week before.

C: I don't think that's true. Is that true?

G: I think just last week and 6.01.

C: Maybe. I haven't tried transcribed 6.04 yet, so.

G: It's because they kept on going, "I'm baring my feelings like a girl in here!"

C: Yeah, and because Crowley was made fun of for wearing a kilt.

G: Sam and Dean are like, "Okay, well, that's not what we're looking for, I guess." How do they know that?

C: Yeah. Why can't vampires be luring men?

G: Be gay? They say it's you either be gay or a straight vampire. That's the only options.

C: I see. Well, I guess I'll never be turned, then.

G: Yeah. I mean, there is Louis de Pointe du Lac, so you never know.

C: That's true. And the two other gay- the three other gay vampires. The four other gay vampires? I don't know what's going on with Daniel yet.

G: Who are they?

C: I mean, Lestat, Armand, and Claudia! [G: Oh my god!] So there's our fourth gay vampire, and then we might have a fifth gay vampire in Daniel.

G: Anyway, so they decide to follow the two other couples that they've been eyeing instead. Sam follows his assignment, and that turned out to be like a vampire for real, and he cuts off the head. Meanwhile, the couple that Dean follows get it on on an alley, and Dean literally shoves the guy off the girl and then tells the girl to run, and then he's cornering the guy, going like, "Let me see your fangs!" and then he does, but it's fake fangs, and Dean's mad at him. And then he has glitter on his face, and Dean goes, “Ugh, you have glitter on your face!” and the guy goes, “It's just to pick up girls, man!” And Dean asks if it works, and the kid goes, “Yeah,” so.

C: Supernatural really said "It's okay to be gay as long as you're straight." [both laugh]

G: That is the Supernatural philosophy, it feels like. [C: Yeah.] Yeah. But they also said, "It's not okay to be gay, even if it's because you're straight, like if you're in love with your girl." [C laughs] So I don't know. They go back and forth.

C: Yeah, it's real confusing. I think the difference is that Dean's being gay for Lisa is out of love, and this guy's being gay for this girl is out of lust, and lust is fine, but love is ewww, disgusting! So yeah. [C: Yeah.] What a fascinating mindset to have. [C: Yeah.] Yeah, anyway, as Dean is walking, there's a voice that goes, "You're pretty." And then Dean turns around, and it's the same guy that jumped Kristen earlier.

C: Yeah, not Robert, the other vampire.

G: No, yeah, the other guy. And Dean goes like, “Oh, I don't swing that way." Or no, he says, "I don't play for your team." Straight Dean truthing! Love it. [both laugh] And the guy goes like, “Okay.” And then he starts attacking Dean, and he gets Dean pinned against a dumpster, and then he cuts open his hand and smears blood over Dean's face. But as this is happening, Sam rounds the corner.

C: Yeah. Quite before this is happening.

G: Yeah, he notices that this vampire is just about to cut open his arm. So it's not happening yet at all. He could have stopped it immediately. But he lets Dean get turned, and then he's just standing in the corner like, chest puffed out-

C: He makes a little sicko smirk.

G: Yeah, [laughs] he's doing his sicko face. And yeah. And then as he's sure that Dean is getting turned, he goes, "No!" [both laugh] and then he starts attacking the vampire. Yeah. Later on, we realize that the reason why this vampire said "You're pretty" is because he's specifically targeting attractive people so that he can send them to bars to recruit.

C: And the thing is, Dean might be into 17-year-old goth girls because he's a horrible person, but like, have you- I don't know if they'd be into him back. He doesn't have the look.

G: Yeah, I mean, specifically not with their modus operandi of “We're sending skinny boys into bars to attract teenagers."

C: Yeah, with like, dark hair. [G: Yeah.] And very, very, even paler than Dean's, skin.

G: Paler than the foccacia you made, yeah.

C: Yeah. He doesn't quite have the look, but yeah. I don't know.

G: Yeah. Like, Dean isn't Twilight handsome. [C: Mm.] He's- I don't know.

C: Supernatural handsome.

G: You know what, later on in this episode, Dean comes out of the shower or something wearing a Henley, and I was like, "That's the guy who's hot. Good for him." [silence] Sorry, is that weird?

C: I'm happy for you. [both laugh]

I've heard people liken Dean's turning to sexual assault-

G: Well, yeah.

C: Which, yeah. That is sorta the idea of the entire episode.

G: I mean, it's pretty obvious that that's the line that they're making. They literally do keep those girls in cages later, and specifically, Boris, the vampire that's like old as fuck-

C: But like, Dean's turning specifically?

G: No, but what I mean is the turning of those girls are perceived as sexual in nature, and so for Dean, I don't think it's such a far line to be like, he turned Dean also, so you can interpret that as like that also. And also, it is very much a they're pimping these people out, and so with Dean specifically, that's explicitly what they're gonna do with him. That's why they turned him.

C: Yeah, that's what they're gonna do with the teenage girls, too.

G: Yeah.

-

C: They're in a motel room, and we get a bit of Dean POV, and apparently, being a vampire, a lot of sensory overload, which we also saw with Gordon. But yeah, he can hear everything way louder. All the lights are way too bright. [G: Yeah.] Dean's like, "Man, this sucks. I can't believe I'm gonna die. You called Samuel, and he's gonna kill me when he gets here, and I'm gonna ask him to do it because you won't do it." And Sam's like, “No, no, no, we can figure this out!” And then Dean starts hearing Sam's heartbeat, and it's completely steady, like he's not at all panicked, which I think was a fun little detail to throw in.

G: Yeah, the heartbeat? It's so cool. It's so cool.

C: Sam says, “That's 'cause I'm trying to stay calm, Dean! 'Cause I care about you!” [G laughs] Sam asks how it feels, and Dean goes, "You want to talk about my feelings?" and Sam says, "No, I mean physically." And he's just generally very curious about a lot of aspects of vampirehood throughout the episode in a "he doesn't really care!" way. He looks in the mirror, and there's like a little baby fang coming in on the top part of his gum.

G: Love it. Love it!

C: Very cute. And then we cut back to Sam POV. He hears some sounds from the bathroom. He goes inside. Dean has escaped through the window, and now he's in Lisa's house, and he's mimicking the book cover.

G: You know what? [C: Yeah.] Now that I think about it, Sam and Dean in their childhood, or at the very least, Sam in his childhood, must never had pretended to be a vampire at any point in his life, and that makes me so sad. [C: Yeah.] He's never done a "Mwahahahaha!" and that makes me- Maybe that explains Sam's psychology entirely. I think Dean- Do you think Dean, before he was 4, would have done that shit, or would Mary have been like, "No." [C laughs]

C: Huh! I don't know. Are kids into vampires before age 4? Some of them. I guess they see them in Sesame Street.

G: [overlapping] No, because they see them in Sesame Street. There's Count Dracula.

C: Yeah. Sure, maybe Dean had his vampire phrase.

G: Do you think Dean ever did Count Dracula's accent, and Mary was like, "Dean. [both laugh] This is not who you are!"

C: Yes. I do.

G: Maybe when Sam was a kid, he watched an episode of Sesame Street, and he did Count Dracula's accent, and John wrote in his journal, like, [C laughing] "Sam is evil. He's on the way to being a monster."

C: "He wants to be a vampire." [G: Literally.] Dean's mimicking the My Summer Blood book cover because Lisa's sleeping, and he's standing over her, watching.

G: [laughing] Oh, that's what they're doing! [C: Yeah.] I completely missed that!

C: Lisa wakes up and sees him. Dean's like, "Hi, I wanted to see you." And Lisa's like, "What's going on? What's wrong?" And I don't understand why Dean won't just tell her. [G: Yeah.] I don't get it.

G: Dean also did this in Season... 5! I was gonna say 4, that's why I said it like that.

C: Yeah, showing up, being ominous like, "I'm gonna die soon. But I love you." Like, what is this for?

G: It sucks! It's a horrible thing to do. It's a horrible thing to do. Just write a goddamn letter.

C: Yeah. And like, if he's being selfish, and he really needs this kind of closure, well, don't be. And I don't know. Call? Leave a voicemail? Yeah, letter works too. It seems out of character for him to be putting Lisa and Ben at risk like this.

G: I mean, he also literally did do it in Season 5, but like, at least that one, it's not like he's putting them in explicit risk, although I suppose he was, because it's like the angels were monitoring him or something. But he was already gonna say yes, so I suppose there's like less of a-

C: Yeah. He won't tell her anything, which I think just makes all of this worse. If she knew he was a vampire then like, they could actually talk after this instead of being like, "Oh. This guy was on his path to domestically abusing me."

G: "And my kid," yeah.

C: And my kid! Anyway, he goes like, "I just need you to know... you and Ben, thanks for everything."

G: So fucking corny.

C: She's like, "Dean, you're scaring me." I don't know. I just thought they had a better communication thing set up. [G: Yeah.] Like, I liked their relationship, partly because I thought that they- yeah- would actually be honest about each things with each other about hunting, yeah.

G: The thing with the Apocalypse is like, Lisa did not know that the Apocalypse was happening. This one, she is aware that Dean's going hunting. She's aware that there's dangers to that. And so like, not communicating it to her is not sparing her anything. She knows that this is a possibility. So why not just tell her that it's what happened?

C: Yeah. I don't get it. So in this world where he says goodbye and then leaves forever, she's just like, "Wow." He already tells her that he's going to die. So like, yeah, what is being gained here? Just being like, "I don't want her to think about me in my last moments like that. I want her to think me as a human." Whatever, Dean! Whatever.

G: Yeah. I mean, Dean has so many hangups about everything. Honestly, when he was like, "And Samuel's gonna kill me because I'm going to ask him to," I was like Jesus Christ, dude. Like, calm down. [C laughing]

C: Yeah. I guess it's just hard to machete off your own head.

G: Yeah, I suppose it is hard. Or is it?

C: Pretty sure it is.

G: He can just look at a barn, see if there's any- What is that thing called? I don't even know what it's called until the Supernatural episode aired. T-bar?

C: Oh, rebar!

G: Rebar? Rebar. [laughs] What is a T-bar? I don't know, but a rebar. But he can just look at a barn and see if there's any rebar there and run towards it.

C: Would that work? I thought it had to be decapitation.

G: Oh, yeah, you're right. I mean, if he's stuck on a fucking rebar, it's not like he can go anywhere. [C laughs] What needs to be done is, Sam needs to pick him up by the shoulder and then impale him on a rebar, and then his feet are like dangling the whole time. He's like, "I can't jump off this thing because my feet is like above the floor!" [C: Yeah.] Yeah, that's what needs to happen.

C: So true. And yeah, he just won't tell her anything, and she's like, "No, you can't just do this. Explain what's going on." And Dean's just like, "I can't bring this shit home to you. My life is ugly and violent, and I'm gonna die soon!" He literally just brought this home to her!

G: He literally brought it home already. [C: Ugh!] It's hilarious that it's vampires that killed Sam and- Well, Dean. [C: Yeah.] Many things wrong with the finale, but the right thing is that a vampire killed Dean. [laughs] I think also, they just got lazy. That's why they did a vampire. Don't you feel like? They just got lazy? That's why a vampire killed him?

C: Maybe.

G: Like they were like, "It doesn't matter who does it as long as it happens" is the vibe, pretty much, and a vampire is the closest thing to like a menacing human being that we can put here.

C: Sure. Everyone's a human being-looking thing in Supernatural, though.

G: Yeah, but a vampire only- what? Bears his fangs? Everyone else turns into a- They have a stick up their arm or whatever. [both laugh] I don't know.

C: Sure. So Lisa comes in closer, demanding he tell her what's going on, and he shoves her against the wall.

G: And they linger on it. Dean leans in-

C: Right. It seems like he might feed.

G: [laughing] And then Dean turns around, and it's the funniest fucking shot in all of Supernatural. [C: Is it? Oh!] Where he's looking over- The window is ajar, so the moonlight is pale across his skin, and he's slowly opening his mouth, and the fangs are coming in. Baby's first teething!

C: He goes into the hallway, and Ben has woken up and is like, saying hi to him, and Dean tells him to stay back, but Ben doesn't, so then Dean also shoves him into a wall and then runs out. And Lisa comes out, and she's like, "Jesus fuck," and she pulls Ben to her. [G: Yeah.] And that's for that scene.

G: Yeah.

-

G: Anyway, Samuel arrives in the motel. Sam opens the door for him, and Samuel's like, "I can't believe you lost Dean," blah blah blah, and Sam was like, "It's not my fault, Samuel. I can't believe you're blaming me!" [C laughs] Anyway, Samuel says, "He's a monster now. You've gotta be prepared to do the right thing." And Dean, very ominously standing on the side, goes, "I told you he'd kill me when he showed up." [C laughs] And yeah, he- like, Sam and Samuel- Is there a better way to say Sam and Samuel that isn't "Sam and Samuel"?

C: We can just give him a completely different name. We just call him "Mary's dad" the whole time.

G: Sam and Samuel Campbell. Literally. So they grab their machetes and hold it ominously as Dean, also equally ominously, turns the corner and shows himself. And Samuel asked if he fed, and Dean is like, "Close. I was close, but I didn't. I went to say goodbye. And that was a bad idea!" He literally is speaking like this for some reason. I mean, I get that the reason is that he's upset because, you know, he's a vampire and he's gonna be dead soon. But as we have established before, I don't like brooding characters. [both laugh] Dean tells him like, "Okay, just, you know, cut my head off now or whatever." But Samuel says, "I didn't come here to kill you, Dean. I came here to save you." And then Samuel starts talking about how he has a recipe for a vampire curing thing, "But it's important that you haven't fed yet."

C: Yeah. Also, Sam acts really shocked when he mentions this, which later, Samuel brings up, "You already knew about the cure, Sam. Why did you say 'what?' back then?"

G: Yeah. And it is actually funny. [laughs] You can see the moment Sam realizes that he needs to act surprised. Like when Dean goes, "What?" And Sam goes, "Whaat?" immediately after. [laughs] So real! You know what? Is Sam the worst actor in the world? Maybe that's the reason why he's a tree in the fucking play that he was in when he was a kid. [C: Yeah.] Anyway, what they need is like a bunch of stuff, but the most important part is that they need a fang from the vampire that turned Dean.

C: No, they just need blood from him.

G: No, they need a fang, right? Or they need blood-

C: It says "blood of the fang that turned you," and "the fang" just refers to the vampire.

G: Ahh. That's interesting! The whole time, I thought they were gonna get his fang!

C: No.

G: Horrible! Well, [laughs] Sam goes, "That guy was huge." Sam, you're literally 6 fucking 4 and a giant! So yeah. Dean volunteers to get it, because he said he can just go into their nest because he's one of them now and get the fucking thing. So their plan is that Dean shoots this guy up with dead man's blood. I forget. Dead man's blood is literally just blood you get from a dead guy?

C: Yeah. [G laughs]

G: Iconic. Anyway, Sam volunteers to come with Dean, but Dean says, "You smell like a hamburger." And so Dean goes alone, and he brings some dead man's blood with him in a syringe, and it's one singular syringe for this whole entire endeavor.

C: Hell yeah!

G: He's going to a nest, by the way. He's going to a place where there are many vampires, and he beought one fucking syringe.

Dean heads out, and Sam and Samuel start like planning to head out to get the other ingredients. But Samuel starts getting suspicious, and he goes, "What the hell's wrong with you, Sam?" And Sam pretends that he doesn't know what Samuel's talking about, and Samuel's like, "You know about the cure. I told you about it months ago!" And Sam was like, "No, you didn't. You must have told somebody else, like Christian or something." [C laughs] And Samuel says like, "That's weird, because if you had known, like I think you had, it's almost like you let him get turned so that you can go into that lair or something and find things out."

C: Yeah, "and find the alpha vamp that we've been chasing."

G: Yeah. And Sam just goes like, "I can't believe you'd think that of me! You think I'm evil? Well, maybe you think that because you're evil!" [C laughing] Honestly, Sam is like- It is kind of a nightmare situation that Dean is in, if we're being completely honest. It's a fucking nightmare to be in this kind of situation, [laughing] but Sam is the funniest guy in the world.

C: Yeah. Absolutely.

-

C: Dean has gone to the vampire nest, and, you know, he sneaks into the building, and then he runs into Robert from earlier, and Robert's just very friendly and bro-y with him. He's like, “Oh my god! Hi! Sup? Glad you made it, man!” and fist bumps him. And he brings Dean over to a fridge full of blood bags and is like, "You must be so starving. Like, here's some food." And Dean goes, “I'm okay. Um, I killed so many people on the way over here, so."

G: [laughs] And the vampire is like, “Whoa, man. I mean, we're not supposed to do that, but that's soo cool." Good for him.

C: Yeah. [laughs] Dean has his ominous line about "First chance I get, I'll show you myself" because he's gonna kill Robert. I am curious about why they're not supposed to kill anyone. Why can't that go hand-in-hand with recruitment?

G: Well, because if they kill someone, that's someone that they didn't recruit.

C: Yeah, but it seems like they only need to recruit hot people, so. Most people are-

G: What?

C: They're only trying to recruit attractive people to like, continue this pyramid scheme, so.

G: Oh, and most people are ugly as fuck.

C: Yeah, so other people are up for grabs. And also, all blonds.

G: Is it like, "Don't put in the energy to do that"? If you are killing someone, then you're putting in the work to kill someone, so might as well just put in the work to recruit someone and drink from a blood bag.

C: I guess so. I guess like a truck of blood is like a lot of people's worth of blood. [G: Yeah.] Dean passes by some other vampires who are sort of glaring at him, and Robert says, "Don't worry about them. They're jealous. The recruiters get to bang all the chicks."

G: Yeah.

C: Yeah. So- I guess I wasn't entirely sure. Okay, so like, part of it is during the recruitment process, you might have sex with a teenage girl. And is the other part like, once they're turned into vampires, they remain specifically sex slaves for the recruiters? Or like-

G: I'm not sure, actually. Also, I don't think they only recruit good-looking people. Because this vampire did say that like, "All these people, they're just jealous of you because they're ugly as fuck, and you're not."

C: Yeah. They also look basically the same level of track of attractive as Robert and Dean.

We see Kristen in front of a laptop, sitting on- not sitting on Boris's left, but he's like, looming over her. And yeah, so he's telling her what to type on the computer in order to catfish another girl, and yeah, he's like, creeping on her. He's sniffing her hair and all of that, and she's very uncomfortable with it. And there's some other teen girls in cages, who are drinking blood from bags, and Boris has some line to Kristen where he calls her "sweetheart" and tells her to "Go to the cage and then march that little ass right back here." So yeah, I mean, it's bad. Don't like it. [laughs] [G: Yeah.] And there's like a moment where she like, locks eyes with Dean. And like I was like, "Is he gonna help her?" No.

G: He's going to murder this girl!

C: Yeah. Nothing. Yeah, Boris is like, "I thought that hunter killed you," and Dean's like, "What's a hunter?" [laughing] That's actually also a regular word in the English language that you could understand from context clues, Dean.

G: Literally.

C: Yeah. And Boris is like, "Don't worry. I'll kill him."

G: Do you think all monsters think of hunters as like, that's the word they use? Some sects of monsterhood must call them different names.

C: Other words, yeah. I guess not vampires. Boris says that he's like, 600 years old, and now it's a great time to be a vampire "because these stupid little brats are so horny, they've reinvented us as Prince Charming with a Volvo. You're like, gonna be the hot vampire of their dreams and then bring them home to me."

G: Honestly, Dean looks more like he would be a werewolf in a vampire/werewolf book.

C: Yes, I agree. And he's saying all of this while he's pulling the hair of one of the girls in a cage. And Dean asks about the cages, and he says, "That's just till they're compliant." So why isn't Dean in a cage? Why aren't any of the guys in cages, if they also have the same job?

G: Yeah.

C: There's just sort of this underlying thing that like, if a man gets turned into a vampire and is told that his job is going to be to prey on teenage girls to turn them into sex slaves, that he'll just be down for it?

G: I don't even know, man.

C: Like, he'd just immediately be down for it, so there's no need to like, break him?

G: You know what I solemnly think? I think they think it's going to be gay to have men in there. [C snorts]

C: Yeah, you know what? [laughs] Yeah. [laughs] I believe it. I think what I was more thinking was just they're partly doing this for sexual gratification, so what's the point of having men in there?

G: I mean, what it is is they're trying to evoke a visual. This episode is trying to evoke a visual. Whatever the fuck the actual vampire lair is doing, I don't know. But like, what the show is doing is, I think, they're trying to evoke a greater sense of horror by the fact that it's women who are in there. [C: Yeah.] Or, I don't know. Like, not greater sense of horror. I think there is an aspect of it that if you put men in there, that it's more real.

C: Hm. Yeah.

G: Yeah. And because Supernatural-

C: Because that's what Dean's role is. He could be in a cage! Oh, no! How horrible!

G: Yeah, but like, because Supernatural is the way it is, women can be just part of the accessories in the general horror of a place, and that's how they do it.

C: Yeah, they're just sort of background eyecandy/whatever. They just make hissing noises.

G: Or horror, yeah.

C: The idea is that like they're acting very animalistic. And the idea is just because they're newly turned, they're like so hungry for blood, so then-

G: No no no, they're like- There's like, a thing that they're drinking, right?

C: Blood.

G: They're being given- is that blood?

C: Yeah.

G: I thought they were being drugged.

C: No, he tells her to go back to the cage and have some blood. It's just blood.

G: Oh. Okay.

C: Yeah. So the idea is like they're just newly turned, so they're like so hungry for blood that they're so animalistic that Dean doesn't need to engage with them on a person-to-person basis. But Dean is also newly turned, and he's not like that. So what's up? But yeah, I think that is just back to the Supernatural deciding who is a person based off of like- Well, they're deciding who's a person first, and then through that, they're deciding what character can be related to Sam and Dean's predicaments in a way. And like, they've decided that because these are girls, that they're completely other from Dean, and that he has no sympathy for them, or any sort of whatever.

G: And like, all the guys in the lair are like, like Dean. Somehow- and Dean is also- has not fed, is newly turned, as you've said, and he's not acting like these girls in cages. [C: Yeah.] So like, yeah. It is just to provide horror for the setting without addressing or engaging with the idea that Dean is one of these people, and it's supposed to be- It's the same reason why he was a monster outside, but here, he's like, completely clearheaded.

C: Yeah. Why aren't the lights in here making everybody really upset?

G: Yeah, literally. It's bright. They have a fucking cathedral ceiling. [C: Yeah.] And the fucking light cathedral, too, not the baroque kind. [C laughs]

C: Mm-hm. Yeah, so basically, after these girls are quote-unquote "compliant," they're gonna go out and fetch Boris boys like Dean, and it's just gonna be all the way down. And Dean asks if Boris came up with the system, and he says, "No, I just implement it. It's our father's." And he points to like this stained glass ceiling. [G: Yeah.] And Dean's curious about this, so Boris is like, "Ooh, okay, I'll give you a private tour." And he starts walking to lead Dean, so his back is turned, and he's so far away, but Dean already pulls out the syringe.

G: Yeah. And he makes a whole thing about it, too. He's like-

C: Your arm is not that long! [G: Yeah.] But when he pulls it out, a drop of it falls to the floor, which Boris hears because of vampire superhearing, and he whips around, and he makes Dean drop the syringe, and he's gonna attack, but then he starts to hear whispers from the ceiling, and then he kind of just collapses, and this happens little by little with each vampire in there. And Dean collapses last. I think it's like his connection to the alpha vampire's weaker because he's the newest one.

He has a vision, and so there's like, a creepy little girl- a little Victorian girl or whatever. I don't actually know what time period this is from. But I feel like that's sort of the image they're trying to evoke.

G: It's like, so wait. This is visions from the alpha vampire, right?

C: I think so.

G: But it's not supposed to be like the vampires first turn. This is just some fuck-all turn he does.

C: I feel like it might be. I think it's his first turn because-

G: But it's like, way too recent for that to be the case.

C: - there's like, an image of a cell dividing, which makes it seem like, "Oh, this is science! This is the start of it."

G: No, but like, it's like way too recent. The visuals are way too recent. This vampire that Dean is talking to, 600 years ago. So when was that?

C: That's true. The 1400s. And this dress, yeah.

G: They're supposed to be in a fucking cellar in like, Bavaria or something.

C: They're supposed to be dying of the plague! [both laugh]

G: Literally.

C: No, you're right. 'Cause this is they make this seem like this is the first turning because of all the science imagery.

G: Yeah, and it's The Shining, is what they're doing.

C: Yeah, but it can't be if Boris is 600 years old because he's- unless, like, yeah, because this is more recent than that.

G: He's not even the alpha, yeah.

C: Yeah. And he's not even the alpha.

G: So it must be older than that. Is this vampire turning cavemen?

C: Yeah, no, that's so weird. Like, did they just fuck up?

G: Will we find a Neanderthal with vampire DNA?

C: Don't know.

G: Would be pretty cool if we do.

C: Would be. I don't know. This is confusing. I didn't realize this until you said it. But yeah, I have no clue. Yeah. But there's a creepy little Victorian girl who should be in rags on a dirt floor dying of the plague but isn't. [G: Literally.] And there's an image of a cell dividing. There's a graveyard. And then there's a Black man, who is the alpha vampire, and I remember hearing about how the alpha vampire is Black man, and people talking about that being a racist portrayal, which I think is true, nonetheless. But I am curious about if we see more of him later or if this is sort of it.

G: I don't know. I truly don't know. We'll see, I guess. [C: Yeah.] I'm not doing well in the "have seen this show many times" department. [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] Or am I?

C: You're really not.

G: I have historically not done well on it. You have always known more about this damn show than I have when we talk about it [C laughing] in the episode-per-episode, so like, who even knows?

C: Yeah. And we're both- I feel like during our Supernatural Tumblr days, we were both logged on for about the same amount of time.

G: No, literally. [laughs] We were both logged on in the same hours, which is quite frankly impressive, even.

C: [laughing] Due to the time difference, yeah.

G: Yeah.

C: Right, graveyard classroom, little girl. He's beckoning towards her. There's like, twins. Both little girls. Their teeth are showing. There's like, a line of blood that he smears down both their faces or something. Blah blah blah. But yeah. Should we discuss the alpha vampire being Black? This feels like a bad choice. [laughs] I think it's a bad choice.

G: Why? What are the reasonings that you would put out for that?

C: I think, just, I don't know. I guess vampirism is like, sort of like a blood disease. I feel like the main allegory is either to addiction or HIV.

G: Okay, let's talk about that. Yeah, let's talk about that part first. This episode did make me wonder about like, the rise in the concept of vampires, it must be coming from something. It must be coming from a social anxiety of some kind. And yeah, I do think there is a line between those ideas and the fact that the alpha that the Supernatural is doing is Black. But yeah, go on.

C: Yeah. So yeah. Okay, I think this episode of vampires are mostly sexual predation. [G: Yeah.] And then I think addiction and like, bloodborne diseases, especially like maybe HIV or whatever are also things that have sort of created the vampire as we know it. And then Dracula originally was about like, fear of the foreigner mostly. And I feel like all of those things are things that can be related to like, negative ideas around Black men, so I think that's iffy. I think the fact that this is happening in the Sera Gamble-

G: Also, yeah. I don't know. I'm just uncomfortable again, because you said the Sera Gamble, and like the last Black vampire we got from Sera Gamble is, in fact, Gordon, and like, I don't know. Sera Gamble did not write this episode, and like we don't know if it's part of the script, like if they wrote that in. [laughs] I think it would be weirder if they did. [C: Yeah.] But I don't know. That is a choice that you make as a casting- If you look at the casting, if you look at the edit. You know, those are choices that you make. And like, we have talked about how this season, with the fact that with Raphael and like, just the regular episode-per-episode beat, [C: Yeah.] it's not looking good. [both laugh] And so it's not like a benefit of the- Again, I always say it like this, but it's not like a situation where you'll be like, "Okay, I'll give it the benefit of the doubt."

C: Yeah, yeah. Season 6 has a lot more Black characters, and most of them are villains. Yeah. It's just odd. It's just odd

G: And you have this episode that's running on the idea of- There's no like black vampire that we see this episode, aside from the alpha.

C: We see one in the lair. [G: Really?] He's not a recruiter. He's in the crowd of people who are jealous Dean's a recruiter, and then Dean kills him at some point later.

G: Ah. Yeah. I do feel like some- This episode specifically, the vision of a vampire that we were supposed to see is like, a young white person who's like, banking on the idea of being pale and white. [laughs] You know what I mean? And so I don't know. Etc, etc.

C: Yeah. And it's the fact that the alpha vampire is also like giving Boris instructions on what to do. So like, you have this Black man who's saying like, "Send out all your pretty white boys to like, turn teenage girls into sex slaves." I just don't think that's like, the look you want for this episode. [laughs] It's the sexual predation episode. And like, in these visions, like, I guess the people that he's turning are like, these little white girls in like, Victorian England or some shit, [laughs] and I feel like there's like a lot of fears about black men raping white women and white girls, as we've mentioned before, and like, that sort of plays into that, too. And I think the fear of the foreigner plays into this, too. So yeah.

G: It still bothers me so much the way they do the Gordon episode. 'Cause they play up that visual. They really do. [C: Yeah.] The idea of Gordon preying on innocent white women. [C: Yeah.] And so, yeah.

C: Yeah. Yeah.

G: You think it's Sera Gamble's fault? [laughs] I mean, yes, I think it is.

C: Yeah. I mean, I think, right, because Gordon is based off of another character in a different franchise who's Black, so she did specifically make him Black. Like, that was on purpose. And then she wrote the episodes with him in it?

G: Yes!

C: So yeah, that's all on her, baby. But are you talking about is it her fault in this season if she didn't write it? Not sure. I don't know what the showrunner's role is regarding mapping out things and casting, but I think she at least had the power to like, I think if she's overseeing this to go, "Huh. I don't know about this one, guys." And she didn't, and I think that means something as well.

The vision also shows a red circle on a map around Aurora, Illinois, apparently, so I guess that's where he is. So Dean wakes up, and everyone else has already gotten up, and Boris is releasing the girls from the cage to attack Dean.

G: The sic on Dean.

C: Yeah. Why would they do that?

G: Because they're animals, Crystal! [C laughs]

C: Yeah. Yeah, that is what the episode is saying.

G: Yeah. They're attack dogs, is what they're doing.

C: Logically, they're not compliant yet, which means that they don't really have any loyalty to Boris, and Dean doesn't have human blood, so it's not hunger. So there's no actual reason, if you thought of them as people with thoughts and feelings, for them to go after him, but because they're being portrayed as attack dogs-

G: That's why I thought they were being drugged! I thought they were being drugged, that's why they were doing all this.

C: Yeah, no, I'm pretty sure it's just blood.

G: But like, Kristen isn't.

C: She isn't what? Like, animalistic? [G: Yeah.] Yeah. He sent her back to the cage to drink the same thing as them, though. So it's just that we saw her earlier, so they're like, "Well, we'll let her be portrayed as a person." [G: Yeah.] But yeah, I think there's no real logic to it. It's, as you said, just sort of the horror aesthetic of these hissing women.

G: It is fascinating that Supernatural shows that like, the turning can only be reversed if you haven't drank blood yet. [C: Yes.] I think they use it as a way to excuse this massacre that happens.

C: Yes, I agree, because or else, it's like, "Why wouldn't you just fix everybody?" [laughs]

G: Yeah. "You can only be fixed from monsterhood if you remain pure!" [C: Yeah.] I hate Supernatural. [laughs]

C: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. So it's just a fight scene where a bunch of vampires are going at Dean, and he injects one with dead man's blood. He's going around with his machete, etc. And yeah, they do explicitly show him killing those teenage girls. Yay.

G: Yay. And then, like, I don't know. Sam and Samuel show up outside, they get attacked. We go back to Dean, and like, Boris says, "This doesn't end with us," or something like that. "This is bigger than the both of us." So more ominous stuff for the future of Season 6, I guess. And then, yeah. Eventually, Sam and Samuel come in, and, as you said earlier, dead girls strewn everywhere to greet them by the door. And then they head into the center of the place, and Dean is sitting with the head of the vampire underneath his foot. I find it so annoying. For some reason, I found this so- I just- I find it so annoying. And you know, Dean is like, he's clenching his jaw, and he's like, "I got him" or whatever.  Or like, he says, like, "I'm good." Yeah. So fucking annoying. Hate it. I can't even articulate why. I just- I dislike it.

C: It's the specific brand of like, action hero, grim anti-hero trope.

G: Yeah, like, "He didn't want to be a killer, and he's damn good at it," [both laugh] you know?

C: Yeah. I think he wanted to be a killer, though. I think he did want to do that.

G: Literally.

-

G: Sam, Dean, Samuel are now in a fucking shed or whatever, and Samuel is preparing the cure, and it's like just a mug of like, very red tea. And there's like, bits and pieces of twigs and leaves in there, which I thought was pretty fun. And he warns Dean like, "Oh, just so you know, this is gonna be- it's not gonna be easy what you're about to do." And I was like, "Dude, what? You're gonna make him stay a vampire? What the fuck is this?" [both laugh] So Dean just drinks the potion, and at first, nothing happens.

C: But before he does that-

G: Oh, yeah, before he does this.

C: Sam just goes, "What did you see in there?"

G: Yeah. Sam's fucking interrogating him. And Dean was like, "Dude, I cannot fucking hear you because your blood is too loud, so let me drink this first." And at first, nothing happens, but then he vomits everything out, and Samuel says that like, "Yeah, he's like, vomiting out the bad" or whatever.

C: He draws out his machete, which I think makes no sense to me. [both laugh] [G: Yeah.] 'Cause he says, "Either the cure's working or Dean is dying." What's the machete for then? [both laugh]

G: To make it quicker! [C laughs]

C: Yeah, how nice.

G: What happens is Dean starts getting visions, and he starts going back through the time where he was a vampire, and then noticing things from a different perspective than he would have or something. And a part of it was the last thing that he sees is Sam standing in the alley right before he gets turned. And it's like, the Sam smirk. [laughs] So wonderful. It's the Sam smirk. And I do think this scene is shot well, and like, edited well and directed well, that it really does evoke in you the dread of the situation as we go to like, Dean's eye as he's completely still on the ground, and then it slowly pans up to show his face. And yeah. It's great. Especially because it's like, loud loud loud loud loud, and then the realization happens, and then it just goes completely quiet. It's pretty cool. I really like this scene. I thought it was like, well done. Anyway, he's back in real life. He's just reeling from what he found out. Man, what a horrible situation! I feel so bad for Dean, honestly! It sucks. And it's like it's the fact that even if he catches Sam in the lie, Sam just straight up goes, "No. You're wrong." [C: Yeah.] Yeah. [both laugh] Which is like, a different kind of bad. It's layers.

C: Yeah. It's 'cause Sam doesn't feel bad about it, so there's nothing that Dean can really hold on to regarding like, "Hey, stop that."

G: Yeah. And like, Sam doesn't even like acknowledge that it is something that happened or it is something that's done. And you know, it's such a huge- Even without the subtext of the episode where it's sexual assault, right? Like it is still a physical change that was imposed on him that is terrifying [C: Yeah.] and massive. And Sam literally just stood in the corner and gave a fun little smirk about it. Like, it's terrifying to think like, "I'm going to be in this in a car with this guy for like, forever." It's such a creepy situation, and I do enjoy it.

-

G: Yeah, anyway, so they're back at their motel, and Sam and Samuel, they're packing up. Dean goes out of the bathroom, and I also like the shot they do here. I like the directing of this episode. The shot they do is like, it's the door opening, and you see the room from Dean's perspective, and like, you know, Sam and Samuel in there. And I don't know, I think it just really evokes the unsettledness that Dean is feeling. [C: Right.] Anyway, so Sam starts interviewing Dean about what happened in the nest.

C: Yeah, he says the exact sentence that he said before Dean drank the thing. It was literally like, "Ugh, you were being so dramatic earlier, but I can ask again. So what'd you see?"

G: Yeah, literally. And Dean relays that they're getting orders via hallucination or whatever from their alpha. Oh, "a psychic thing" is what he calls it, from their alpha, and that he's recruiting, and that's what they're doing. They're recruiting people. They're building an army, just like BTS. And yeah. And Dean says also that, "Oh, we hunters, we don't scare them anymore."

C: I didn't- from where did he decide that that was the case?

G: I don't know. I truly don't know, honestly.

C: Boris is like, "I'll kill Sam if he comes here." But like, yeah, okay, you wouldn't be scared of one hunter if you had an entire nest. Like, is that new?

G: I don't know. Are they really banking on them- on like, monsters and vampires specifically being afraid of them?

C: Yeah, I didn't know that was part of their main strat.

G: Yeah. Well, anyway. They head out. I don't know. Samuel goes whatever the fuck he goes, and Dean is by the Impala, trying to call Lisa, but it's going to voicemail, but he doesn't leave one. He just hangs up. And Sam comes in and he's like, "Okay, how did it go with Lisa?" And Dean's like, "It didn't." And then Sam just goes, "Oh. Sorry!" [both laughing] He's kinda iconic. I keep on reiterating that this is such a terrible situation, but Sam is literally fucking iconic. [C: He is.] Dean goes, "Well, I mean, I've lost life as I know it, but you know, at least I always know that you're always gonna be on my side, and I can always count on you, no matter what. Right, Sam?" And Sam puts on his most fakeass smile that the world has ever seen. [C laughs] And he goes, "Yeah. Of course, Dean." And then he does a reassuring smile that is the creepiest thing in the world. I love it. I enjoy it so much.

C: Yeah, I love it when men lie.

-

G: Well, what did we think about this episode?

C: Um, nah. I would rather not have it. Yeah. [laughs]

G: The thing is like, it's unfortunate because- knowing like, if you remove all the parts of the episode that are well, fundamental to it, [C laughs] it is a pretty good concept. It's an amazing concept of like, the main concept of "Sam lets Dean get turned," and it's like, creepy and nefarious. That's such a fun thing in the episode, and I greatly enjoyed all the parts that are about that. But yeah, the rest of it is- Well. [laughs] Yeah. I don't know. I just wonder, like, what is Supernatural trying to do? And the thing is like, a part of me, I've mentioned it in the past, but like, a part of me does feel sometimes, like, "Am I just a complainer who loves to complain?" Just because Supernatural is doing something that is like they're trying to portray something that is bad doesn't mean that they agree with it or whatever. And obviously, they don't agree with all this.

C: Yeah, they're anti-sex slave. Or anti-sex slavery, but.

G: The aspects in which they approach this are like, wrong. [laughs] But like, I don't know. I don't agree with it, and that's the problem. The victim-blaming part of it, the way that they portray it in specific ways wherein you're not supposed to empathize with these girls. Like, yeah, their thesis is “Sex slavery is wrong. You can't just kidnap girls and turn them into prostitutes.” [C laughs]

C: They're so brave for saying that.

G: And like, yeah, well, I agree. And then also, you put these girls in cages and specifically delineate between the girls in this place and the men in this place- because that is the delineation. It's girls and men. And the men in the situation, I don't know- not even that they have agency or anything, but they're just like, human beings that you're supposed to look at- well, "human." They're vampires that you're supposed to look at and think of as people and capable of intellect and capable of thought and capable of blah blah blah, but the girls do not get any of that at all. And it's just, I don't know. It's just a fascinating example of trying to say something and then just like, falling face flat in a pile of shit. [C laughs] Like, what is this?

C: Yeah. I don't know, man. Brett Matthews, explain to me. Please.

G: And this is not new for Supernatural. This is literally our complaint about 6.03, right? That’s the one where Cas goes like- What's that? “The Third Man.” [C: Yeah, Aaron Birch.] Yeah. That is our complaint about how they handled the police brutality thing that they were trying to address in that episode. Like, yeah, they tried to do it, and it's not an inherently bad thing to talk about these things. It's just that the way they talk about it completely lacks, I don't know, like, anything. No nuance, no substance, nothing new to say, nothing- you know. It's just, what are they doing?

C: The idea that the victims are just like, well, it happened to them. That's bad. We're now done with them. Like, yeah, there's no idea of humanity or a future for these people.

G: “These girls are so stupid and horny, and that's why they're now in cages!” Like, fuck off. [C: Yeah.] Yeah, anyway. [laughs] Best Line/Worst Line? [both laugh]

C: Best line. Was there a line where I was like, “yippee!” at any point?

G: Well, I'm not sure. Best line. I do enjoy the part with Lisa in the beginning, like, when Dean was calling Lisa, [C: Yeah.] and Lisa's enthusiasm to see Dean. Wait, I'm going to look up actually, what she says. Because at some point, Dean is trying to say, “Oh, yeah, I'll do this first, I'll do this first, yeah.” And then the entire time, Lisa is like, “Yeah, okay, yeah, okay.” And then at some point, she just goes, “Okay, Dean, whatever! I understand that you have to do all these things, but can you just like, get your ass here?” And I thought that was so cute that like, you know, they have all of these logistics to get through, but the fundamental of it is that Lisa is just so excited that Dean’s gonna be there.

C: Yeah, I also liked that scene. I liked the affection we got to see in their relationship, so I'll just go with that one too. Or Sam's, “What?” [both laugh]

G: Literally. His very theater kid who is so bad at it, has no future in this career whatsoever, "What?" So important. We've talked in the past that Dean and Lisa don't really have a lot of affectionate scenes together, and the one time they have sex, it's a dream. [both laugh] So like, I don't know. It is fun to see all this, I think. Just, they like each other! And now Dean is going to be so miserable forever because Lisa is not answering his calls because he went there as a vampire and then pushed her in the wall and then pushed Ben in the wall. [both laugh]

C: Yeah, kind of on him with that one. [G: So yeah.] Yeah. And then Cas is gonna wipe her memory at some point. [G: Yeah.] Yeah, where is Lisa's role in the rest of this season? Do they make up after this? Or is it fully just like, she's just there as someone that monsters put in danger to motivate Dean to do things now?

G: I don't know. [laughs]

C: Yeah. Well.

G: A surprise to no one. Yeah. Well, worst line.

C: A lot of them.

G: I think I just hate all of the lines when they were in that damn room of the girl, and they kept on- [C: Yeah.] I just thought the making fun of Twilight thing is corny, tired, and played out for Supernatural.

C: Yeah, and how that plays into the victim-blaming of it all. [G: Yeah.] Yeah, I agree.

G: Well, spreadsheet. Spread those sheets.

C: Yeah. I think there's misogyny that's inherent to the episode. [G: Yeah.] How high?

G: Okay. Misogyny? 4, I would say. [C: Mm-hm.] Racism-

C: I think the alpha vampire being Black is an issue. It's hard to know what number of points it is until- Are we gonna see him more?

G: Who knows? I mean, I could probably look it up. I think we will! Let's see. We will.

C: Okay, yeah.

G: Oh, yeah! We will definitely!

C: Okay.

G: That's so weird! Because like, when I was watching this episode, I didn't really see it clearly, so I didn't recognize him. But yeah, I recognize this guy completely! [C: Okay.] I didn't recognize him this episode. He's gonna be here a lot. [C: Oh, okay.] Yeah, we can reserve our other complaints, perhaps, in later episodes where he's prominent.

C: Yeah, once we have more of him. But yeah, I think there's still an amount of points to be assigned just to the mere fact.

G: 1? 2.

C: I was thinking 2, yeah. [G: Okay.] And then we'll get more as we go. Homophobia, there was the scene in the bar of the guys kissing and Dean looking disgusted, [laughs] and then the glitter line, so that probably totals to like, a 1. Is that a 1 or more?

G: Yeah, I think it's a 1. [C: Yeah.] I think, you know what? The fact that they had two guys kiss, maybe that cancels out the 1. No, it doesn't.

C: It cancels out Dean looking disgusted at it?

G: No, it cancels out the 1 in the 2, so there's still the 1, yeah.

C: I see. Yeah.

G: Yeah. Well.

C: Alright. IM that Db.

G: I can't believe they gave Jensen Ackles a good episode for his debut directing. Like, of course it’s gonna be highly rated, and it's gonna get good reviews. [C: Yeah.] Like, it's a fucking gimmick episode. Fuck off. [C: Yeah.] Sorry! I mean, it's fine. Jensen Ackles can direct if he so desires. Okay, IMDb. I would say this one is low. Okay. Do you guess, or am I first?

C: I'm odd.

G: You are!

C: Yeah, okay. I agree that this is low. I think this is going to be a sort of polarizing episode. I don't know. Um... 7.8. 7? 7.7.

G: Yeah. 7.7. [C: You?] Me? I'm going to go 7.9.

C: Okay. You're gonna be right. You've been right every time so far, right?

G: Have I been?

C: The closest every time.

G: Oh, well, I have been closer every time, but I've only been right once, I think. Okay. Let's see.

C: Watch it be so high.

G: Oh. It's an 8.3.

C: I fucking hate everybody. Is everyone like, "It's soo funny!"

G: "Nice parody and mythos?" Not true.

C: What?

G: It says it's a "nice blend of parody and mythos." [C: Hm.] It says, “surprisingly atmospheric and completely intriguing.” I do think, as I've said, I do love the bare concept of it. It's just what they do with it is- And by bare concept, I mean not the Twilight part. The Sam and Dean and Sam being a horrible person part of it.

C: Yeah. This person says for the parody that the jokes mostly land without them being too mean-spirited or sour. I don't know about that.

G: Oh, this one says, "I never watched any show that left me with that much horror before as this episode did. What started out to be a casual vampire hunt, turned out very shocking, disturbing and catastrophic. The season started out with the amazing 'Beautiful loser' track [C laughs] and it is indeed Dean that is loosing every thing. Didn't only loose his family but also his trust for his younger brother." [laughs] Love it! Love losing trust for your younger brother. "We all know something is very wrong with Sam this season, but seeing him watching his brother turned into a monster, not stepping in to help him and only watching with a smirk was very disturbing." Oh, these people are saying that Samuel is getting more interesting. "first he knew a cure for Djinn poison now for a vampire's, but still that most troubling question: who does he work for and who brought him and Sam back?" So true. [C: Yeah.] You know what? This one says,Kudos to Jared Padalecki for pulling out such an interesting character change on our beloved Sam and turn him into that cold uncaring dick masterfully." I do agree. I think it is pretty cool the way Sam is acted. [C: Yeah.] Oh, this one brings up the part where Samuel goes, "turns out there's a Campbell in him" or something about Dean, which is, I think that is interesting. I just fail to find Samuel interesting in any regard whatsoever.

C: Yeah. [laughing] Sorry, this last 1 out of 10 review, [G: "Gross!"] "I don't know what was more disgusting of this episode, [G laughs] Samuel's bald head or fat stinky vampire's face"?

G: There are more disgusting things this episode, I assure you!

C: "I wonder do producers choose the most disgusting actors and more them even less bearable in purpose"? So, okay, yeah, I think there are worse things in this episode than people you consider ugly being in it? [laughs] What does this mean? Yeah, and then they said that what's dead must stay dead.

G: This has 26 downvotes, and I support that. [laughs] [C: Yeah.] 0 upvotes, 26 downvotes. Love it.

C: I think they didn't want them to do any new vampire episodes after “Dead Man's Blood” 'cause that was like, the peak or whatever.

G: I do think there is an aspect to like- I've said this earlier, but just to reiterate, or I don't know, approach it from a different way, there is like an aspect to vampire that is close enough to human that they can just portray it as like a bunch of people that are menacing, which is what they do in “Dead Man's Blood,” I think. They had that group of vampires that were just like hanging out on the side of the road, threatening Dean or coming up to him. Is that the one where John says that “We should send Dean out as bait” or something? [C: Yeah.] Well, yeah. And I do think with Supernatural, they tend to approach the vampire in that regard. That is how they do it, as creepy humans who are sex traffickers or whatever. [C: Right.] I don't know. I just think that's something to think about. I wonder what other- can you think of other monsters that they do that with?

C: Crossroads demons?

G: Yeah, but they treat crossroads demons, at the very least, having some sort of keeping to their word or whatever. You know what I mean? And because they don't come in a group, there's no power in number that they do with the crossroad demon as well, which is a lot of the vampire thing that they do. The point of a vampire is the nest. Yeah, I just find it interesting, the social dynamics of the monsters in Supernatural. [laughs]

Well, that’s it for this episode of Busty Asian Beauties. Next week, we will be discussing 6.06, "You Can’t Handle the Truth." Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts, and yes, we are trying to release every week now, [both laugh] something we’ve never done before.

C: Is the next one the aliens one? The fairies one?

G: Yes.

C: Hell yeah. Follow us on social media! I love when Dean's homophobic. We are on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com. Our official tag is #BABPod, B-A-B-POD. Thanks to everyone who's donated to our Ko-Fi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod, which is where our outtakes live, and check out our merch at babpod.redbubble.com.

G: You can email us any feedback, comments, or inquiries at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com. See you guys next time! [both] Bye!

[guitar music]

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 108 Transcript: Hello, It’s Allergies. Hello, It’s Rhinitis. And this is Stuffy Asian Beauties.

[intro guitar music]

G: Hello, it's Grey.

C: Hello, it's Crystal.

G: And this is Busty Asian Beauties, a Supernatural commentary podcast where I, someone who has seen the show many times...

C: And I, someone who only knows the show through social media, discuss every single episode of Supernatural from start to finish. Also, we are both Asian.

G: Both Asian! For today's episode, we are discussing Season 6, Episode 4: "Weekend at Bobby’s," written by Andrew Dabb and Daniel Loflin, directed by Jensen Ackles.

C: Ugh. I couldn't really tell that there was anything special, director-ing-wise, so.

G: Which is probably a good thing, yeah.

C: Yeah. It means he wasn't noticeably bad at it.

G: Yeah. And this is like a gimmick episode. Like, there's a gimmick. I suppose every episode supposedly has a gimmick, though. [C: Yeah.] Yeah, but this one, it's a gimmick episode. Okay, let's start with, did you like it?

C: Yes, but I don't think the writers like women.

G: Well, that's obvious fro everything that Supernatural has done.

C: Yeah. And every time they brought out the damn cobbler, I started booing and throwing tomatoes at my screen. I think that was stupid.

G: Didn't they just do it one time?

C: No, there's several times where Bobby brings it out, and he is like about to take a bite or whatever, and then somebody calls, and he's like, "Oh my god! I never will have rest in order to like indulge in the domestic life provided to me by women, which could comfort me. This is so sad!" [G laughs]

G: Yeah. And I think me asking, "Does it ever come up?" is proof that I did knit while watching this episode. So sorry.

C: Yeah. Hmm.

G: No, not "hmm." [both laughing]

C: What's the right sound? "Yayy!"

G: You're supposed to say, "So true!" Like that.

C: Okay. So true!

G: I do like this episode, I would say. Like, if I was a person who liked Bobby- [C laughs] It is incredibly hilarious to me that Dean was like, "Wow! Some things are more important than Sam, aren't they?" And it's like, dude, you're talking to Bobby. [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] Everything's more important than Sam, it seems like.

C: For real.

G: What did you know about this episode before going in?

C: I knew that people liked it, and that's about it.

G: Or did they? They did, yeah. I mean, this is a beloved episode, and allegedly, Bobby is a beloved character, so that's not really a surprise. [C: Yeah.] Yeah. Do you think watching this, you understand better the people who are like, "My favorite Supernatural character is Bobby"?

C: Um, no. I mean, he's fun this episode, I suppose, but he's just sort of a POV character. [G: Yeah.] I feel like I don't know him or like him better in the episode. I think it's just like, "Oh, it's interesting to have an episode to think about all the effort that goes behind these sort of phone calls that come up sort of deus ex machina during a case episode for the Winchesters." That was what this episode added for me.

G: I think the Bobby aspects of characterization that we're supposed to learn is that he doesn't know what to ask for help, and he neeeeeds to! or something.

C: Yeah. I guess so. Who cares? [G: Yeah.] Bufus are in love, though.

G: I do think it's incredibly fun- Okay, let's start with the "Then" sequence. I do think it's incredibly fun that we start in like a "triumphs of Bobby's bisexual history." [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] Good for him. Like, we meet Crowley, we meet Rufus, and we see Kim Rhodes. [C: Jody.] What is her character's name? [C: Jody.] Jody, yeah. We see Jody. And it's like, is Bobby involved with these people in different manners that are similar? Yes, is the answer. [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] I am so happy to see Rufus again. [C: Oh, absolutely!] He is incredibly fun, as always. And we get Jewish Rufus confirmation this episode, [C: Yeah.] which is also fun. I do think because Bobby's character type is grumpy old man, they play into that quite a bit, and I think it's the first time I realized that they do actually- like, that is Bobby's archetype. For some reason, I never really realized that before, that they're doing an archetype with him. And they are. He's the grumpy old man! [C: Yeah.] And he is so grumpy and so old, and he has never been so cold [C laughs] or something.

C: He's not that old, but yeah.

G: He's like 61 at this age.

C: Is that so old?

G: No, that's like normal.

C: Well, I guess Penelope Scott wasn't that old when she sang that song. She was younger than 61.

G: Yeah, allegedly. It's about feeling old. Do you think Bobby feels old?

C: Yeah.

G: I think he feels tired. I think he's going to say "estoy cansado" next episode.

-

C: Alright, we start the episode, and we're in Bobby's house, and he's working on some kind of summoning ritual. When it succeeds, Crowley shows up in his house, and Crowley's, you know, being a flippant, silly guy or whatever, and Bobby's quite antagonistic.

G: And this was like, a year ago, so this was like, pretty much immediately after the Apocalypse shit went down.

C: Yes. They have an exchange where Bobby offers Crowley a drink, and Crowley's like, "Ewww!"

G: "I only drink alcohol that is Scottish" or whatever.

C: Yeah, something called Craig that has reached at least 30 years.

G: Okay, I have a question. Do you think they use the Scottish accent to make fun of that guy later? [laughs] I think they do!

C: I don't think so. Really?

G: I think I think they make the whole Scottish thing a way to make fun of Crowley, or something that Crowley should be embarrassed of, or something. [C: Really?] They asked him if he wears a skirt, and he's like, "It's a kilt." [C: No, that's true.] Bobby's like, "What's his name? That's not true. That's Scottish." And Bobby-

C: Well, that's just because he has a British accent.

G: I know, but they make it a reveal and everything [laughs] [C: Yeah.] that Crowley is Scottish, and it's like a whole thing. It really is a whole thing, seems like.

C: Yeah, I guess so.

G: And I do think an aspect of it is like, because it's funny or it's supposed to be. [C: Huh.] Like, it's supposed to be funny that he's pretending to be British, and he's actually Scottish.

C: Yeah, I think it's funny that he's pretending to be British and he's actually Scottish.

G: "It is funny." [laughs]

C: But like, I don't think that the fact that he is Scottish alone would be played for laughs. It's the fact that he's ashamed of it.

G: He's hiding it. [C: Or hiding it.] No, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it. But like, I don't know. Don't you think the fact that he is hiding it is something that is like, whatever? Are they trying to say something? What are they trying to say?

C: I mean, within the UK, there is accent discrimination [G: Oh, yeah. Of course.] So, just, I don't know. He's just trying to seem what other people would perceive as more fancy and sophisticated. But yeah, I think they they just put it in with his whole like, "He's a fake!" stuff along with his selling his soul for an extra three inches on his dick.

G: Yeah, I do think it's a fascinating choice to have him be a tailor in his life, which is something they mention later, [C: Yeah.] and then one of the things that he was like, upset about because he was like-

C: "They ate my tailor."

G: Yeah, they ate his tailor, and that's like a sign of him not living the fancy life that he wants because he's being, you know, Apocalypsed. [C: Yeah.] And like, yeah, I do think I get what you're trying to say, and I think that's true.

C: I guess it's the- [laughs] were you asking if it's bad that they're doing it?

G: No no no, I'm asking, what is the intentionality behind it?

C: Yeah. I do think people in general take Scots less seriously than Brits, though. [G: Yeah.] So that's part of it.

G: My baby sister did say when we were listening to the David Tennant How to Train Your Dragon audiobook that she can't understand his accent, and "Can we just watch the movie instead?" [both laugh] So yeah, it very well may be.

C: Yeah. Well, your little sister is the arbiter of the greater social opinion.

Bobby tells Crowley, "We put Lucifer in the cage, so you promised that you would give me my soul back." Crowley does this thing where he snaps, and all the writing on the contract appears on Bobby's arms.

G: Yeah. Pretty fun! Later on in the show, they would just have a scroll.

C: But he says, "You didn't read the little paragraph that I added in the contract particularly closely. That part of it is on your crotch, that might be why. But anyway, it says that I only have to make the best efforts to give you back your soul, so, um, you know, I tried. But I can't!" So Bobby's stuck with the usual demon deal thing of he lives for ten years and then he goes to Hell. Bobby's like, "I hate you and want you to die. And also, you're standing inside a devil's trap painted with invisible ink or whatever the fuck. So I'm gonna keep you here until you give me my soul back." But Crowley is just like, "Whatever." and summons a hellhound to threaten Bobby with. So that's our cold open.

-

G: So we go to modern day, and the situation is that Sam and Dean are looking at a case, and they realize that they don't know what the fuck is going on, and so they ring up Bobby. At this point, Bobby's outside, and the phone rings a lot. And then when he comes in, Dean is being like a fucking horrible guy. He's like, "Ah, I can't believe you didn't answer me within two rings, Bobby! I can't believe it! Do you have better things to do? Did you have a fall and you can't get up?" which is very rude of Dean. And yeah, he delivers the news of they can't figure this thing out. "Can you figure it out for us?" Bobby goes, "Okay, whatever." And so Bobby starts his investigation. His research, even. And he like, starts reading books from his house. And this is all set in a soundtrack. A song I don't recognize. He's like, "Oh, damn it! I can't find anything!" He goes out. He goes to the Sioux Falls University Library. Very fun.

C: He passes his neighbor-

G: Yeah. On his way there, he's driving. There's this lady who he smiles at, and the lady smiles back and waves. And yeah, I do think there is like, a fun aspect of this where he seems familiar with like, the people and the place, and, you know. That is fun to think about with the respect of Sam and Dean, especially Dean this season, thinking of hunting as something that has no roots, and that that is fundamental to the hunter experience. And then you see Bobby, and he has roots!

C: He says that he's done a lot for the town. I guess in "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid," we learn that he has a reputation as the town drunk, but that's still a role in the community, I guess. [both laugh]

G: No, I mean, he does save people and stuff, but I mean, the only reason why those bad things happen to this town is because he's in it, so like, really, [C: True.] what is he doing for this town? A lot, allegedly.

C: I'm sure he's hunted other things before that weren't after him specifically.

G: Stuff is happening. His car won't start, you know, and a door is locked. He breaks in to get inside, and he does say "Balls!" throughout this montage. Before this, was it ever like, a Bobby tagline? I don't think it was.

C: He'd said it before, and nobody else had said it, so.

G: Yeah. But like, was it a thing already? Perhaps it was. I just didn't care about Bobby. It's a very distinct possibility.

C: It's possible, indeed.

G: There's like, you know, more of the montage, and then he figures it out. He calls Dean. Bobby is about to deliver his lore speech, and he says, "You're hunting a lamia," which is a Greek monster that they've only seen in Greece, and it's weird that it's not there, it's outside. Anyway, Dean asked, like, "How are we gonna kill it?" And Bobby just goes, "Well, the easiest way is silver knife blessed-" blah blah blah, and then Dean just goes, "Okay, whatever!" and then hangs up immediately. And Bobby doesn't get-

C: He told Bobby, "I only love you like a coworker."

G: Literally. Bobby's kind of upset because Dean didn't let him finish his lore montage.

C: And it's 5AM for him.

G: Yeah. What time was it for Dean? Where are they? They're in Wisconsin.

C: Well, I think it's about the same time for Dean, but-

G: Well, it's also 5AM.

C: - they make a big point of the clock changing [G: Oh, yeah, showing the clock, yeah.] while he's doing research to show how he never gets any rest because he's working for Sam and Dean and all these other people.

G: Yeah, he's working for the knife that is Sam and Dean. He goes, "You're welcome," reinstating to us that Dean didn't even say, "Thank you"!

C: Wow. So at this, there's a call from the basement where some woman yells, "Hey, I'm still here!" And Bobby goes downstairs, and he has a crossroads demon tied up in his panic room. And he's been questioning her, trying to get her to tell him Crowley's real name, his human name, so that he can threaten him into giving him his soul back. And this demon is a hot woman in a little black dress, like every crossroads demon we've seen, and she's doing the whole thing where she's crossing and uncrossing her legs and all that stuff because nobody knows [G: Yeah.] how to write evil women on Supernatural.

G: And she's being sexual, and she's saying sexual innuendo. And you know what? A part of me was like, "Wow! I thought the demons were just into Sam and Dean because they thought Sam and Dean were hot, and the show is trying to tell us that Sam and Dean are soo hot [C: That's true.], but no! They also do it to Bobby, who is just fine!" [laughs]

C: Well, they also have Bobby have a love interest this episode, so maybe [G: Ugh. So true.] their point isn't that all demons are sexual, but that Bobby is so hot!

G: Yeah. Is Bobby hot? A question we will never answer. [laughs]

C: Yeah, I mean, I can answer it. [G: Okay, answer it.] No. I don't know. I'm sure Bobby has appeal to some people.

G: You know, people say that the older you get, older people are more attractive to you. [C: Yeah.] And that lady later is, I think, younger than him.

C: I don't know. We'll be able to look up the actress later.

G: Are we?

C: We will. [laughs]

G: Yeah. Or will we? [laughs]

C: What do you think is gonna happen that we won't be able to? We might forget.

G: Yes, I think the main thing would be forgetting. [C: Yeah.] I think the second main thing is [C: Uh-huh?] life in the world as we know it collapsing entirely and IMDb being inaccessible.

C: Okay, you know what? I'm just gonna look up "Marcy Supernatural." She's gonna have a Wiki page where she has the actress's name.

G: [laughs] Okay.

C: The actress is Jennifer Aspen. [G: Hell yeah.] I'm going to find the birth year of Jennifer Aspen. [typing] She was born in 1970, so she is younger than whatever this guy's name is. Jim?

G: Beaver.

C: What's his name?

G: Beaver. [C: Yeah.] That is a fun surname.

C: He was born in 1950, so she is 20 years younger than him.

G: If you're 40 years old, would you want to date a 60-year-old? Question of all time.

C: I'm not 40 years old, so I wouldn't know.

G: Yeah. But at 20 years old, you do want to date a 30 years-old. So it's possible.

C: I don't wanna date a 30-year-old.

G: Yeah, that is true. Well, I want to date a 50-year-old, but let's not talk about it. [both laugh]

C: She'll notice you one day.

-

C: She starts trying to provoke him by bringing up how he killed his wife again and again, and Bobby's just like, "No, I just want to torture you by taking something that's yours"--they don't tell you what it is until the end of the episode--"and lighting it on fire." And she tells him that it's a myth, but he lights the things on fire, and little patches of fire show up on her skin, and she's screaming in pain, etc, etc. And she tells Bobby that Crowley is the king, not of the crossroads, but of all of Hell.

G: Hell, baby! Good for him. Very fun.

C: Then the bell rings, and he goes up, he looks through the peephole of the door, and his neighbor is there, and she-

G: And she's fixing her hair.

C: - and she's arranging her hair to look nicer, [G: Yeah.] and Bobby checks that his breath doesn't smell bad and straightens his clothes a little before he opens the door.

G: Which is fun, yeah.

C: Yeah, I think it's a nice, cute way to show that two people are mutually interested in each other.

G: Yeah. Is this the equivalent of having a crush on your coworker? [C: How so?] No, this is the equivalent of having a crush on your neighbor, which allegedly happens.

C: Yes, which is what's happening.

G: Yeah. She brought a peach cobbler. What is the thing that Karen was into making? It was pie, right?

C: Yeah, it was pie. [G: Yeah.] And Marcy says it isn't just a peach cobbler. It's a ginger peach cobbler.

G: Which sounds wonderful!

C: It does sound fun and good.

G: Yeah, anyway, she brings it over, and, you know, she's like, "Oh, it's really good. It's my specialty!" And she tells Bobby to like, smell it, and then he does, and he's so awkward. But he does give a smile, and he's like, "Mm, very fun." There is screaming in the back [laughs], and he goes, "Oh, yeah, I'm so sorry. I love horror. It's a guilty pleasure of mine." And she's like, "Love it! Love horror! Have you seen Drag Me to Hell?" [both laugh] and he's like, "Well, I'm trying to avoid it," which is also funny. Anyway, she goes, "Well, you know, over the weekend, you can come over to my place. We'll have dinner, and we can watch a movie, and I can whip up my batch of famous white chocolate popcorn!" She's really trying.

C: Yeah, "I'm gonna cook so much 'cause I'm a woman!"

G: Ugh, this is true. But like, how do you invite people to your house? "Have a drink." Don't have drinks. Don't like drinking. "Have some coffee." Hate coffee, more than alcohol! [C: Yeah.] "Have some tea," I guess.

C: Sure, yeah, or it could just be a chips and salsa situation.

G: I don't like salsa. I also don't like chips.

C: You're not Bobby Singer! [both laughing] Why are you talking about this like this?

G: No, this is true. She should have just invited Bobby for some nice whiskey or something.

C: Yeah, I mean, I'm fine with- well, I'm not blaming her as a character. I'm blaming the writers.

G: No, no, yeah. No, but like, this is like that situation where it's like, "Oh, Jimmy was having a crisis, but he's not gay. So how do straight people have crisises?" You know?

C: Ah, yeah. How do women invite people over without cooking? [laughs]

G: No, how do people in general? Like, how do you do it? [C: Yeah.] "Let's watch a movie," I guess, is something.

C: Yeah, I think that's enough. You can just have it during not meal hours, like 2PM, so they have lunch beforehand by themselves.

G: Yeah, this is true. Or you can go out somewhere else that isn't the house. Allegedly people do this.

C: Yeah, I don't think there's that many restaurants in Sioux Falls.

G: Yeah. But he's done so much for the community! Maybe even established a barbecue joint. [C laughs]

C: So true. That's one of his other jobs. We just didn't see it because it wasn't important to his journey?

G: Yeah, it's like, you know, it's like automatic to him. [C: Yeah.] It doesn't even register anymore that he's absolutely killing it at the grill. [C: Yeah.] That is a thing that he does. He grills stuff, right? [C: Yes.] So true. Go Bobby. Anyway, Bobby kind of hesitates, and Marcy's like, "Okay, yeah, well, that's fine. But I also have a woodchipper that's broken, and if you would like, you can come over and look at it, because people say that you're like, handy and stuff," [C laughs] which is very fun. Yeah, and Bobby's like, "Okay, let me see!" Before she leaves, she extends a hand for Bobby to shake, and they're a bit awkward about it.

C: Yeah, 'cause he's holding the cobbler with both hands. [G: Yeah.] So he has to maneuver it.

G: Yeah. As she goes, Bobby closes the door in this like stance, like, thinking about it a little bit. And then he's like, "Okay!" He puts down the cobbler, he heads downstairs, [laughs] he starts screaming, "What's his name?!!" to the demon while blasting it with a flamethrower. We are again faced with the question of all time. What is Supernatural's deal with torture?

C: I mean, didn't we already answer this question? [G: Yeah.] It's that they don't think monsters can be convinced or reasoned with, so the only language that they can understand is pain.

G: I mean, this is a rhetorical question. It's a rhetorical question.

C: Yeah, okay. [laughs]

G: But they really do have a deal with fucking torture is what I'm trying to bring up. [C: Yeah.] She finally reveals that Crowley's name is Fergus MacLeod. The name has been revealed, and the crossroads demon was like, "Okay, well, now, you gotta send me back. It's our deal." But Bobby just holds up the bag. Of what? We'll figure out later. And he's like, "You know what? I gave it my best effort, and I'm still going to burn you alive." And so he does by torching the thing in the thing.

C: Are we supposed to think he was cool for that, or is it like a, "Wow, he's really gone off the rails."

G: The thing is, I think we're supposed to think he's cool because it's not like they make any effort to show us that, like, Bobby's losing it or whatever the fuck. [C: Yeah.] And the thing is, I think we're also supposed to think Sam is cool later for going, "You know what, Dean? We had a deal." So like, what's the situation?

C: That they hate women, maybe?

G: Yeah, I mean, that is the situation. Very obviously this situation. [both laugh] It is fascinating that like, "Oh, we had a deal. But you know what? I'm not gonna respect it." is a sign of strength, but also, "We had a deal, and I will respect it" [C laughs] is also a sign of strength. [laughs] [C: Yeah.] So it's not about the respecting of the deal. It's about the existence of a deal itself, I think, is the thing. I think also-

C: That you're the one with power?

G: Yeah, it's the power of like- But like, you also have the power if you let the deal hold by itself, right? Or I think the point is that with Crowley, I honestly thought this is what Sam was gonna say later. With Crowley, Crowley can do things for them, [C: Yeah.] but this demon is dispensable, I think, is the situation. So it's like, why would I- With Crowley, if we let him go now then, it's like, he owes us. Versus this demon, yeah, she owes us. But like, who the fuck cares because we don't need her? I think, is the vibe. [C: Uh-huh.] Horrible!

C: Bobby is doing some research on Scotland in general.

G: Literally just Scotland. [laughs]

C: He picks up a call from Garth! [G: Yeah.] Who we haven't met yet.

G: Yeah, it's Garth reveal. Hi, Garth! Love Garth.

C: Yeah, and it's a fun little bit where he's like, "This doesn't sound like a vampire. You should call the FBI." And then [laughs] he immediately gets a call on his fake FBI phone and it's Garth. [G laughs]

G: And Bobby goes, "Not me, idjit, like the real FBI! I wonder how you're still alive by now!" [C: Yeah.] I do love that he was just researching Scotland. It's like when Sam looked up vampires. So real.

C: Yeah, so real. [laughs] It's where to start. Yeah, he's picking up a bunch of different phones where he's being an FBI guy, a CDC guy. [G: Yeah.] Female hunter mention where, at some point, while picking up a phone, he goes, "Of course she's one of ours, and if she says she's gotta dig that grave up, you better damn well let her."

G: Feminism. [C: Slay.] I do love this scene, and I think it's quite evocative. The visual of having all the phones there. I am a bit sad that Jensen Ackles, the director of this episode, did not linger on the visual of it because it's good. It's a good look. Maybe it did linger on it, and I just wasn't looking. That is also a possibility.

C: No, but you mean sort of a wide shot [G: Yes.] with the montage where he's moving around, hitting different phones at different times. That would be fun.

G: Yeah, like, have like a shot that is the phones that is not focusing on Bobby, but focusing on the phones, I would have enjoyed. And they do do that later in the show when it's Sam and Dean's turn to be those people, where it's like just a bunch of flip phones, and it's like, "Oh, yeah, FBI," which is very fun. And like, that is- I mean, this scene, like, it's fun, but the value of it for me is it showcases what Bobby's role is in the community. He really is a pillar in the hunting community, which is very fun, and also, the fact that they bring up this virtual again later on with Sam and Dean as they now become a pillar of the hunting community, now that Bobby is gone. [C: Yeah.] It is like, fascinating to think about the fact that Sam and Dean have this such loyalty to the hunter brand when they have like, actually quite little connections in the hunting life. Like, you know. I think it is telling that John brought them up in this lifestyle or culture and environment but also made them pretty much not intermingle with anyone who is also that lifestyle and environment. You know what I mean? [C: Uh-huh.] And I do think if they had more hunter friends, they would ease up a bit. [laughs] Like, maybe they'd calm down, you know?

C: Yeah, they would unclench.

G: Yeah, unclench a bit. And I think the times in the show where we have seen the concept of a bigger hunter commune is with Ellen and Jo's bar-

C: The Roadhouse, yeah.

G: The Roadhouse. I'm so sorry. I completely forgot the word for it! That's so sad!

C: Yeah. Do you hate women?

G: [sadly] No. [both laugh] I don't. But yeah, so we have the Roadhouse, we have this Bobby thing, and I suppose we'll see it later on in the show.

C: Someone starts pounding on the door, and it's Rufus! [G: Yeah!] Iconic scene, I think we've all seen it, where he's like, leaning on the doorframe, out of breath, and he goes, "Oh, good. You're home. Listen! You gotta help me bury a body."

G: And Bobby's just staring at him like, "What the fuck is up with this guy?" Yeah. This scene is wonderful. It is iconic. And yeah, love Rufus! It's the first time we're seeing him since the beginning of Season 5 if I'm correct, right? I am correct. [C: Yeah.] 5.02? [C: Stupid-ass episode.] I think, because in the past, we have established that Rufus and Bobby are kind of like a- they're mad at each other, but jokingly, but also not jokingly, which is a fun dynamic. [C: Yeah.] And you know, what we've seen of Rufus and Bobby- Okay, let's do a like, timeline of Rufus and Bobby from what we've seen in the show so far. We have, like, Bobby telling Dean, "Go to Rufus. He'll help you."

C: Yeah, Season 3.

G: Yeah. And Dean being like, "Hi, Bobby sent me" and Rufus being like, "Okay, well, then, fuck off," which is very fun. [C: Yeah.] We have "If you call again, I'll kill you." [laughs] [C: Aww.] and then Rufus calling again immediately. [C: Yeah.] We have, "And Rufus? Take care of yourself." Ah! Love it. [C: Yes.] And then we have this. And I do think, like, it is a consistent-

C: Was there anything else? I think throughout Season 4 or 5, Bobby was like talking to Rufus about apocalyptic signs a few times.

G: Yeah, but I don't think we actively would see it, right? A lot of the times, it's Bobby saying, "Yeah, Rufus said." But I think the phone calls I mentioned and you mentioned are the ones that we really see them talking. [C: Right.]  don't know. I think it is an interesting dynamic of like, antagonistic friends. So important. [C: Yeah.] And they are friends! Look at them!

-

C: In Bobby's scrapyard- and yeah, so Rufus brought some body over because police were chasing him, and they rib each other about like, "Oh, you're getting slow!" "Oh, I'm getting slow? All you do is sit on your ass all day taking calls." And we see the body, and she's Asian!

G: It's an Asian woman! She's literally Asian, and it's because she's a Japanese monster. It's literally the reason. [C: Yes.] And I mean, I do find it hilarious that they were like, "Oh, we need-" I mean, it's better than having a white woman play it, I guess. [laughs]

C: Yeah, which they've done a lot of times.

G: But also, like, again, we come up to the whole thing where it's like, you only have an Asian person to be an Asian monster or whatever. Or like, you know, having the-

C: Yeah, this monster is an okami, which I think is just "wolf" in Japanese and not like, a creature. So yeah, she has these sharp teeth or whatever. They're both surprised at this because the only time Bobby has ever seen an okami was in Japan, and that also tracks with Sam and Dean hunting something that's usually only in Greece in Wisconsin. So Bobby has a mechanical digger, which can dig a hole for the okami very easily. [G: Love it.] And we get Jewish Rufus confirmation where he's looking at it, and he goes, "Man, I know what I want for Hanukkah." Love it! They bury the body, and they're chatting about the whole Crowley situation. [G: Yeah.] And Bobby says that what he's gonna pursue is that Crowley said in the beginning that he liked Craig, and that he'd been drinking it since he was in grade school, which means that he probably grew up where Craig was made. And Rufus immediately is like, "Oh my god! I know everything about Craig. It's only made and sold in a tiny area on the north tip of Caithness County," and he starts going into like, you know, wine tasting people's descriptions [G: The notes, yeah.] of what alcohol tastes like. And he's like, "I'm not a heathen. I obviously know what Craig is, you dumbass!"

G: So true. [C: So true.] Rufus- when Bobby sent Dean to Rufus, he told him to get a Blue Label, right? [C: Yeah.] That already happened, right? That was in Season 3. [C: Yeah.] And also, when he dies, they pour a whole bottle- whole bottle?! Dude. [laughs] Give a half to yourself, is my opinion. Does Sam and Dean have like, hobbies similar to this? Well, I suppose Sam has serial killers.

C: Cars? One car.

G: Car. Serial killers. [C laughs] What else?

C: I mean, Dean's music is sort of a hobby, [G: Oh, yeah.] especially the fact that he knows trivia about Led Zep.

G: I think pop culture is Dean's hobby. He loves a TV show, movie, a song. [C: Yeah.] A book. He reads. [laughs] Aesop, etc.

C: Yeah, The Odyssey too.

G: What are Sam's interests? He loves serial killers. [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] He loves being vegan, but they never say it. He loves being secretive about the fact that he's vegan, but also very explicitly open about it, just never saying the word, that's a hobby.

C: Uh-huh. He loves doing it, so much. Sam doesn't have a lot of-

G: He loves lore.

C: Yeah, I guess that's a hobby.

G: Yeah. What else are Sam's hobbies?

C: Nothing.

G: He loves a Dewey decimal system, but that's just us projecting.

C: Yeah. Projecting? I don't love the Dewey decimal system.

G: Well, I do love to do a decimal system.

C: You're projecting on Sam and me.

G: Well, he would grow plants after Dean dies, but also again, that's just us, I think. [laughs] Is that true? Or do we see him grow plants when Dean is dead?

C: I don't rember. Well, I haven't seen it also.

G: You haven't seen. [laughs] I was viciously reminded of Jared Padalecki's wig at the finale of Supernatural recently. [C: Yeah.] What a horrible thing they do to Sam Winchester, even. [C laughs] Maybe he's into bag wigs. yeah.

C: Rufus tells Bobby, "You know I have contacts over there in Scotland. I can make a few calls." And Bobby says, "I ain't asking for no help." And Rufus says, "I ain't asking for your permission." They're in wuv!

-

G: Bobby is allegedly about to eat a piece of his cobbler, but then he is stopped by Dean calling him. And Dean's like, "Okay, well, what's the other way to kill a lamia?" And Bobby's like, "Well, did the first one not work?" And Dean's like, "Well, no. So what do we do?" And then Bobby says what they should do, but as he's saying it, there's a massive knock on the door, and Bobby's trying to hold him off, but eventually he had to let them in because it's the cops, including Jody. Well, it's Jody and some other guy. Bobby does this thing where he's like, "Oh, I'm talking to my mom," which is very fun. [C: Yeah.] "Just wait a minute. I'm guiding my mom through cooking." And then he goes back to the phone and he's like, "Okay, well find salt and rosemary, and really cook it well-done" or something. [C laughs] Yeah. And then he goes, "Is it okay now? Okay, well, have a have a fun roast, mom!" [laughs] Would Bobby's mom still be alive? I think so, yeah.

C: Yeah. Well, I don't know. He's 61.

G: In her 80s, probably.

C: She's be 90 or in her 80s, yeah.

G: I mean, allegedly. She's probably dead.

C: Yeah, she's probably dead. I thought it was sweet that he stayed on the phone until he knew for sure [G: Yeah, it was done.] that the lamia was dead.

G: Well, the last time Dean hung up on him, it didn't work, [C: True.] so by the process of elimination, it is Bobby that killed that thing.

C: Yeah. I can't believe that he said the easiest way was a silver knife blessed by a priest when like, you can just get salt and rosemary from the grocery store!

G: How do you get a priest who is maybe not aware of what that silver knife is supposed to do to bless your silver knife?

C: Just be like, "This was my dad's favorite knife, and he died recently" or some shit?

G: Do you think that's gonna work?

C: I don't know. You're the Catholic.

G: My first idea was that they would have- They have a car, so they'll be like, "Oh, our car is new. It's vintage. We just bought it. We want it blessed," which is something people do. People get car blessings. And so they have the car there, and then they put the knife in the car, and then the priest blesses the car, and it will in turn bless the knife.

C: Will it?

G: I don't know. The intentionality is, in fact- [C: Yeah.] But you know, when you bless a car, you open everything.

C: So he sees the one million guns they have.

G: No, I'm assuming they would put that compartment down. But if they put the knife somewhere that a bit of it is peeking out like of the seat or something, but it's still obstructed, and the priest does the holy water, it will touch the knife, and will therefore bless it. What do you think?

C: Sure, why not? [both laugh]

G: Honestly, I don't think it works like that. I think there needs to be an intentionality behind blessing this specific thing. But you know what? It could be possible.

C: Yeah, I guess it was the flamethrower aspect of it that was harder, but they just had one.

G: Yeah. Do you think they do mass blessing to weapons? At this point, just have every weapon blessed, right?

C: True. Does it ever wear off?

G: I don't know. I mean, does holy water wear off?

C: Yeah. It evaporates.

G: Not if you bottle it. Oh, this is true. But would the vapor be holy? [laughs]

C: Well, the vapor would be in the air and not on the weapon.

G: Would the particles itself- This is a separate conversation.

C: Oh, like, do demons walk through the world, and occasionally they go, "Ow!"

G: "Ow! Owie!" Yeah, because there's a concentration of holy vapor.

C: Yeah. Probably.

G: So fun! Love it. Anyway, that's all said and done. Bobby greets these cops and what they're saying is, they put up a sketch of Rufus, and they're like, "Okay, well, did you see this guy? His name is Rufus Turner, aka Luther Vandros, aka Ruben Studdard." And Bobby's like, "Nah, I've never seen that dick." [laughs]

C: Love is real!

G: The cop is like, "How do you know he's a dick, then?" and Bobby goes, "I don't know. I just think maybe he is." [C laughs] And the guy cop is like, "Well, people saw him carrying a body over here. So what's that about?" And Bobby's like, "Look, man, that's soo ridiculous!" And Jody steps in, and she's like, "You know what? Me and this guy, we have a relationship." And she says she's been arresting him for ten years now, so why don't we just separate, and you investigate outside, and I investigate inside. And the cop's like, "Okay, fine." And as soon as the cop goes out, Bobby goes, "Why did you let him go out there?" And Jody says, "Well, I think it would be better if he was out there than in here. I don't think you want him in here." And Bobby goes, "Well, yeah, because I have a body in the basement. But I also have a body in the yard!" [C laughs] Jody is like, "Oh, fuck! Damn it!" And so they go out and they pace about, and they see the guy, and the guy's like, "Bobby, there's a giant fucking hole [C laughs] in the yard. What's that about?" And Bobby's like-

C: But it's empty.

G: Yeah, it is empty. I actually couldn't figure out what they were trying to tell me until later. The hole is empty. I thought they just did a bad job of like, putting the dirt back in the hole.

C: But we saw it completely smooth over it earlier?

G: Is that true?

C: Yeah.

G: Okay, well, that's my fault. My bad, even.

G: Bobby's like, "Oh, yeah, I did a septic tank thing, so watch where you step!" He calls Rufus like, "Rufus, this thing is dead!" Or, well, "This thing is not dead!" [C laughs] Rufus is-they start going back and forth on if Rufus did the proper methods of killing so that this thing will actually be dead. And Bobby's like, "Did you use a bamboo dagger?" Rufus goes, "Yes." "Blessed by a Shinto priest?" And Rufus is like, "I'm not fucking stupid, Bobby!" And Bobby goes, "Did you stab it seven times?" And Rufus goes, "Well, I stabbed it five times." And Bobby's like, "It's supposed to be seven!" And Rufus is like, "No, it's supposed to be five." But anyway, this thing is alive because Rufus forgot two stabs. [C: Yeah.] [C laughs] Bobby asks, "When you found it, what was it doing?" And Rufus said it was feeding on, you know, single white females, usually while they sleep.

C: [laughing] Incredibly funny, incredibly funny. They're usually in Japan. How do they survive off of this diet?

G: No. What Bobby is saying is like, what were they doing when you found it? Not necessarily like, "This is their diet. What's their diet?"

C: Okay, yeah, this is a special one, and it had to come here all the way from Japan because it wanted to eat white women so bad.

G: No, the point is like, "What is the modus operandi of this specific thing?"

C: Yeah! [G: Yeah.] Which I think it's funny that they wrote it to be this.

G: I mean, it is hilarious that they wrote it this way specifically so Bobby can go to his girlfriend's house.

C: Yeah, like, I feel like she doesn't need to be specifically into single white females. Like, I think just the fact that this is your neighbor and it escaped from your property is enough. You could be like, "I saw some tracks" or whatever.

G: Yeah, like, Bobby could be like walking around, looking for a clue to where this went off, and he sees that like, there's a track going to the house or something. [C: Yeah.] Well, that's how it happens.

C: Have we ever had a monster who was only after, like- besides the racist truck [both laugh]- a specific racial or gender group?

G: Well, there's the gay gorgon who was going after gay men.

C: Well, we haven't had him yet.

G: Yeah, but he's iconic, so I thought I should mention him.

C: Alright. Thank you for mentioning him because he's iconic. I just feel like they really went out of their way to do this, and it's silly to me.

G: No, I mean, yeah, they did go out of their way to do this, and it is silly to you and me.

-

C: So we're now in Marcy's house, and she's preparing to go to sleep, but there's like a shadow crossing the window, and then Bobby fucking kicks in her door. He says that she needs to show him where her bedroom is, and he's swinging around a gun and checking everywhere, and she's like, "I'm trying to be chill about this, but what the fuck is going on?" And Bobby asks if she's seen anything weird, and then she notices the okami on the ceiling about to jump at her. And there's a whole fight thing where Bobby's wrestling with the okami a bunch and crashes out of a window into the outside, and they're still fighting, etc, etc. And then they're at the woodchipper, and he accidentally hits the power button, and it turns on, working completely fine, and during the fight, he is able to shove the okami into the woodchipper, and she gets destroyed.

G: Yeah, and Bobby gets sprayed with blood, but then we go to Marcy, and she's completely drenched. It is a fun look, and she's in a white nightgown.

C: She sure is. They're both a little bit in shock, and Bobby goes, "I thought your chipper was broken." And Marcy goes, "I just said that to get you over here." And Bobby says, "I guess I could come over for dinner some night. It might be fun." [laughs] And Marcy just goes, "I don't think so."

G: You know what who would have said yes? [C: Who?] The woman from "Dead Pig Collector," a very fun short story. You guys should check it out. [laughs]

C: From what?

G: No, I'm just promoting it. What? What do you mean?

C: Oh, who wrote it?

G: Warren Ellis, I think. Wait, let's see.

C: It's called "Dead Pig Collector"? [G: Yes.] Okay. Yeah, I see.

G: By Warren Ellis. Very fun!

C: Yeah, and Bobby says, "Story of my life," which did annoy me.

-

G: Bobby calls Rufus now, and Rufus is like, "Wow, I can't believe you're still alive." And Bobby's like, "Yeah, well, I killed it. So fuck you." And Rufus asks-

C: Yeah, he also calls the okami "Godzilla."

G: Is that supposed to be a thing?

C: Well, I guess it's a Japanese monster.

G: Do people think of Godzilla as a Japanese monster?

C: It's a kaiju, isn't it?

G: Yeah, but then like, that's just some guy at this point. Is Godzilla so tied to culture? [laughs]

C: Well, to Rufus, it is.

G: Yeah. Isn't there Godzilla vs. King Kong? Isn't that a thing? [C: Probably.] Yeah, what the fuck is that about? [laughs]

C: I think Godzilla probably fights King Kong.

G: No, but like, is it an underdog story? Like, King Kong is the underdog?

C: I don't know what King Kong is like.

G: King Kong's a giant gorilla.

C: What's Godzilla then? Oh, it's a lizard thing! Godzilla is sort of a dinosaur-looking thing?

G: Yeah, like a giant lizard that is a dinosaur. Yeah, love it. Do you love Godzilla? Yes or no. 5. 4. 3. 2-

C: I've never seen anything. I mean, I didn't even know who Godzilla was briefly.

G: I do think he's removed enough from the concept of being Japanese for this joke to be a thing. Although now that I think about it, why else would they make it?

C: Yeah. [both laugh]

G: And also, this was in 2010, so maybe the concept of Godzilla is less pronounced in pop culture. Anyway, Rufus asked, "Oh, so you just happened to have a bamboo dagger blessed by a Shinto priest?" And Bobby goes, "No, I shoved her through a woodchipper." And Rufus goes, "Oh, okey-dokey! Well, woodchipper, that trumps everything," which is pretty fun, and does remind me of when Rufus was like, "I'm gonna blow their legs off!" and Dean or something was like, "That's not gonna kill them," and he goes, "Well, they can't run if they don't have legs." Rufus thanks Bobby and apologizes. He says, "I screwed up."

C: Okay, Bobby says, "Forget it. I figure I still owe you more than you owe me," which is a reference to a thing we never learn in canon, which is that Bobby is partly responsible for Rufus's daughter's death. Right?

G: Is that true?

C: Yeah, there's a bonus content thing where-

G: I mean, I know that. But like, is that really what this statement means?

C: I think so. I think it's about their past. It felt loaded.

G: Yeah, Rufus does do a "Hm." about it, so maybe.

C: Yeah. It's so sad that that never makes its way into the show in actuality. And they kill him. So it's not like they were like, "We'll reveal this later down the line in the Bobby/Rufus story" and then they forgot. Rufus takes a moment to process those words, and then he goes, "Okay. Well, you owe me another thing because I have a lead on Crowley. His full name is Fergus Roderick MacLeod. He was born in Canisbay, Scotland in 1661, and he had a son named Gavin."

G: After Caravaggio and Shakespeare. So true.

C: So true. The son was the captain of a trading ship that sank in 1723 off the coast of Massachusetts, so he has a ring that is inside a maritime museum of Andover, and Bobby says, "I need that ring." and Rufus goes, "Are you asking for my help, Bob?" Very cute. [G: So true.] And Bobby very reluctantly says, "I'm asking for a ring, and I'd appreciate your help getting it." The world's best proposal.

G: They're engaged! They're about to get married! So true. [C: So true.] Bobby said, "Marry me a little." Is that a funny joke, or is it so corny? [laughs]

C: I don't know.

G: I think if I committed to saying it, it would be.

C: I think Dean and Lisa are sort of the "Marry Me a Little" relationship.

G: No, because his name is Bobby, and he's saying, "I'm asking for a ring."

C: Okay, I see, I see. Yeah, okay, yeah. It's a funny joke. I'm sorry I didn't get it. That's on me.

G: Thank you. You were too invested in the plot of Company to realize the incredibly shallow joke I made.

C: Silly me.

-

C: Rufus is already heading to Andover to get this ring, and Supernatural thinks we're stupid, so he has him exposit to Bobby that "Oh, so your plan is to get the ring and summon Gavin's ghost in order to exchange hostages with Crowley, so that you can have your soul back!" Bobby says, "Yeah, something like that." He is trying to eat the cobbler again, where he takes it out of the fridge, but then the phone rings, and he's so sad. And Dean called-

G: Just eat it while the call is happening, just like me in the podcast and you in the podcast.

C: I don't get it. And me in the podcast! I love to snack during the podcast.

G: No, yeah, it is incredibly funny when I'm editing the podcast, and I start speaking in a way that will imply that I will speak for a long time, and then I hear a crinkle of snacks from your end. [both laugh]

C: Yeah, I mean, it's always first thing in the morning for me, so I usually haven't eaten before. [G: So true.] I got hungry during. But yeah, so Dean's like, "Yeah, the case is fine, Bobby. But it's Saaam!" [both laugh] And Bobby looks up, kind of annoyed. [G: So true.] And he's like, "Something's different about Sam, he's not right-"

G: Honestly, this is a hilarious scene. I mean, it is a hilarious scene. I don't think it's supposed to be funny. It is funny, though.

C: I think it's supposed to be a little bit funny with the whole Sam looking at Dean being like, "Ugh. Okay!" during Bobby yelling at them.

G: I do find it so amusing that like, if you're not like fully invested in the Sam and Dean story, and you're just like, a bypasser in a way- Like, Bobby is invested, but also, he's not like in the day-to-day like we are as an audience, how ridiculous it all sounds. [C: Yeah.] [laughs] Like all their drama? So fucking true. Now, I'm thinking about like when Ellen was like, "Okay, so what's up with you two?" and being like, "Okay, fine, here we go again."

C: Yeah, yeah. I mean, she thought that they were both fighting for the same woman or something, so yeah, to her, whatever their drama is, it seems very frivolous to her.

G: Yeah. Literally. And it probably is. [C: Yeah.] What was happening when she said that? Sam just-

C: Sam's demon blood thing.

G: Oh, yeah and opening the gates or whatever.

C: Dean wouldn't let him hunt.

G: Not the gate, the Cage.

C: That was in Season 2. They didn't know about the Cage yet. This was specifically in 5.02, right? So it was that Dean wouldn't let Sam go outside to hunt on his own.

G: Oh yeah, because of the demon blood. [C: Yeah.] So true.

C: So it was about that.

G: It was about Ruby. Oh, that is the implication that they're doing. Like, they're fighting over a woman-

C: Yeah, but in a different way than Ellen thinks. [G: Yeah.] Dean's like, "Ugh, I know he's been through so much, and he changed, but like, something's wrong, Bobby!" And someone starts calling Bobby, specifically Rufus, and Bobby's trying to cut this short. But Dean's all like, "Can you tell me everything about what Sam was like during the year while he was away?" [G laughs] And Bobby is just like, "Dean, no. I have another call." And he goes, "You what??"

G: Yeah, he puts Dean on hold, and Dean is so bitter, upset, sad, crying, throwing up.

C: Bobby says, "I have to take this. It's important." And Dean scoffingly laughs and goes, "More important than Sam???"

G: It's literally Bobby, Dean. Bobby doesn't give a fuck. [C laughs] And the thing is like, it is not urgent. It is a conversation that can have a pause, you know?

C: It can happen at any time.

G: This is not something that is- The thing is, to be perfectly clear, Bobby didn't hang up. He put Dean on hold, which means that he is committing to going back to this conversation. And if Dean later on wasn't like, "Oh, yeah, Bobby. Never mind, then. Fuck you!" like, Bobby would have continued that fucking call.

C: Yeah, I mean, Dean's just meant to be extremely selfish right now in order to cause Bobby to snap, so these are all things that the writers agree with. It's about how Dean doesn't think about how Bobby has other hunters that he's in contact with. He thinks that he's so special, so he can't imagine that anything could be time-sensitive for him, etc.

G: Yeah. You know what should have happened at some point in Supernatural? [C: Yeah.] While Sam and Dean are visiting Bobby, there happens to be two other hunters that are visiting Bobby that are around their age, [C laughs] and they realize that Bobby has so many like, "like a kid to me" people in his life. [C laughs] It will be hilarious. Dean would literally cry and throw up.

C: Oh, absolutely. In "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid," he was like, "Karen, I hate you, and Bobby's like a father to me! [G laughs] So I don't know why you're up in my business trying to control his life." even though she was like a wife to him, so this is a pretty consistent characterization.

G: So true. Hilarious.

C: So it's Rufus on the phone, and he's driving very fast. There are police chasing him because he stole that ring from the museum, and he's like, "I have to hide this ring!" and Bobby says, "Don't swallow it!" and he says, "I'm swallowing it!" And he does.

G: And it's so cute because it's not like he didn't hear Bobby well. It was more like Bobby going, "Don't swallow it" gave him the idea that he can swallow it, and so he does! [C laughs] So true and so important.

C: Yeah, they are in wuv. And the rest of this, we only hear from Bobby's perspective, they didn't shoot this, but the police catch up to Rufus, and he says something about how the police are using unnecessary force, and that he knows his rights. And Bobby hangs up and goes back to Dean.

G: I did wonder here about like the concept of a, you know, a Black hunter like Rufus, [C: Yeah.] and the types of leeways that Sam and Dean get for being white men. [C: Yeah.] I mean, Rufus was retired for a long time, or at least retired on the hunting side of hunting. He was on the research, as he said.

C: Yes. I have also wondered this, but I don't think I really have anything to say. [G: Yeah.] Except that I do think that him like pointing out the force, and that he knows his rights is something that I hadn't heard Sam and Dean say, and it seems like something that he did like, I don't know. You know-

G: This is more conscious thought about it, yeah.

C: Yeah. Yeah, I guess these weren't the same people who wrote last episode, or are they? Who wrote last episode? Bedlund. [G: Bedlund.] I don't know how much they coordinate, but this is two police brutality against Black people mentions [G: Yeah, they're back-to-back.] back-to-back in this season, so yeah. I wonder if they talked about this amongst themselves at all while writing.

G: If I were to place a bet, I would say no. [laughs]

C: Yeah. Yeah. Just a coinkydink.

G: Bobby is like, "Okay, well, Rufus is being arrested." He goes back to Dean, and Dean is like, "Bobby, what the hell??" [both laugh] That is what he sounded like. And he's like, "You know what? You're the one person I can talk to about this stuff. I'm so stressed out about everything. There's Sam, and there's Lisa and Ben. I don't even know what to do anymore! And you won't even listen to me?"

C: He says that he's the only person he can talk to about leaving Lisa and Ben, which is also the language [G: Not true.] I think Sam used last episode about Dean joining him on hunting. Like, did I totally misunderstand 6.02? Isn't he literally just on a business trip?

G: I think- you know what? When you were saying that, halfway through, I thought what you were gonna say is "Has Sam convinced Dean that this is, in fact, leaving Lisa and Ben?"

C: Or, I don't know. I guess I was more wondering if Dean told Sam that it- phrased it in a way that made it seem like it was more permanent.

G: No, but like, if you remember, the start of that scene is Dean-

C: He is on the phone with Ben, yeah.

G: - telling Ben off in a way that is very much like he is still solidly a part of Ben's life. So like, I think it was explained well to Sam.

C: Yeah. So like, why are they saying leaving?

G: Well, Sam got into Dean's head. [both laugh]

C: So true. He's not coming back anymore. [G: Yeah.] Except when he's a vampire. I know that happens.

G: Only when he's a vampire. Any other situation, he's not coming back. [C: Yeah.]

As Dean is going on this retort, Bobby just does the Kubrick stare, and like, you know, he goes, "Okay, well, I hear you, Dean, but now, it's not a good time." And Dean just goes, "Yeah? You know what? Forget it. I mean, I'm baring my soul like a freaking girl here! [laughs] And you've got stuff to do, so that's fine. But seriously, a little selfish. It's not all about you, Bobby." [both laugh] He's hilarious.

C: They really ham it up here.

G: In fairness, he is incredibly funny.

C: I don't think Dean would say this. [laughs]

G: Yeah. Anyway, Bobby just goes like, "Okay, well, where's your brother?" And then they put him on speaker, Dean calls Sam, and now they're listening to Bobby deliver his angry monologue. He goes, "Well, I love you both like you're my own, I do. But sometimes, you two are the whiniest, most self-absorbed sons of bitches I've ever met!" And you know, he's like, "I can't believe you call me selfish when you two are so fucking annoying." True. "I dig up so much lore for you two, and I pulled you out of fires, and when you need someone to bitch about about each other"--[both laugh] and then Sam hears this and looks up at Dean like, "The fuck? That's what you were doing?" [C laughs] And Bobby is like, "You call me, and I come through, and just for this once, you won't even give me whatever. Anything." And he says, "You guys are not the center of the universe," which will be disproven by the show, [C: Yeah.] "But in case it slipped your mind, Crowley has my soul, and time is running out, and I will be damned if I'm going to sit around and be damned." And he goes, "Well, how about you two help me for once?" And Sam goes, "Bobby, all you gotta do is ask." [both laugh] I can't believe Sam is being included in this! He did nothing wrong. [C: Yeah.] This is Dean's fault.

C: Yeah, I don't know, man. Maybe Sam was really annoying during that year, and Bobby's just been building up to this for him, too.

G: Literally. Do you remember that one time when Sam was drinking, and he was like, "Bobby, I think I'm gonna throw myself into the pit."

C: Yeah. [laughs]

G: Bobby has resented him ever since that conversation.

C: So true. Dean says, "Anything you need, we're there."

G: Yeah, which is how Bobby manages to guilt Dean into going to Scotland via plane.

C: Yeah. Hell yeah. So the next day, he meets up with Jody, and yeah, she says that Marcy called the police and she told her that she'd look into the home invasion but didn't file a report. That seems quite mean. Like, Marcy saw the okapi. Or sorry, the okami? Yeah. Marcy saw the okami. [G: Yeah.] I feel like Jody should probably just explain it to her.

G: I mean, not only saw the okami, saw the okami go through a fucking woodchipper. Like, what's going on?

C: I don't know. But yeah, they don't care. 'Cause what Bobby needs is a favor for his boy best friend!

G: He did not let go.

C: Rufus is being held in Massachusetts on a burglary charge, and he needs Jody to extradite him for a murder charge. And this is, you know, Bobby, reaching out and asking for help more, that's his arc, as you've mentioned, and Jody's like, "That is not going to happen. It's so hard. I would have to call in all my favors. And how are you going to help him escape from being here under a murder charge? This is going to ruin my career." And Bobby's like, "Pwease?? Yeah, I've done a lot for this town, including things you don't know about, and I'm not good at this asking for help thing, but pwease?" And Jody says, "Sorry. I can't." And he's very sad in his house, and then there's a knock, and Jody's there, with Rufus! And Rufus goes, "Miss me?" Ah! I love love. [G: Love it.] Jody says that they have one hour, and then she's going to call the Feds and say that Rufus escaped. And Bobby goes, "Thank you." And Rufus produces the ring, which I guess he shat out at some point, and Bobby is off to clean it.

-

G: Bobby summons the son of Crowley, and this dude's name is Gavin. But later on, and honestly, until now, I mean, honestly, I thought his name was Kevin. [both laugh] Because the entire time, I thought Crowley was calling him Kevin. But no, his name is, in fact, Gavin. It would be incredibly funny to be a guy from the 1660s or whatever- well, I suppose 1670s?- and be named Kevin. Bobby starts talking to this guy, but we don't hear what's happening, and it's like, ominous on what's going on. But then we go to Bobby summoning Crowley. And Crowley allegedly looks bad, but I think he looks completely fine. And Bobby goes, "Well, you look like hammer crap," and Crowley goes, "And you're a vision as always." Love is real! [C: Yeah.] They do this with Dean and Cas, too, in a way that I find completely amusing. I think it was Season 10 after Dean goes back to human from being a demon. Cas goes in, he's like, "Well, you look like crap." And Dean goes, "You, on the other hand, looking good!" or whatever. Incredibly funny.

C: Yeah, I've seen this.

G: Yeah. Are they gay? Question of all time.

C: Yeah. [laughs]

G: They are? Or it's a question of all time?

C: Well, I don't know. That's for you to find out.

G: Yeah. Well, happy November 5 to everyone who celebrated, including meee! Crowley is like, right under a devil's trap, and basically, Crowley talks about how he has trouble in paradise because it's so difficult to run Hell. Crowley goes, "You know what the problem with demons is? They're demons. Evil, lying rats, the whole lot of them. And stupid. You try to show them a new, better way, and they don't want it!" So, you know, etc. He says that maybe Lucifer was right when he wanted to kill every demon in the world. Bobby shows like, the kid. Gavin. [laughs] The kid is a grown man. He's just Gavin to Crowley. And then Crowley goes, "Kevin?" [both laugh] He goes, "Kevin, is that you?" And he starts putting on the dramatics like, "Oh, I love you so much! I miss you! I can't believe it!" but then he laughs, and he's like, "Well, sorry, Bobby. I don't actually give a shit about this kid." I think he says "I loathe the little bastard." So true and so fun. What if the kid has bad vibes?

C: - was had out of wedlock?

G: Yeah. He says, "You picked the wrong bargaining chip, Bobby." But Bobby goes, "Well, what I actually did was that I digged up some dirt on you, and your kid, Gavin, really helped me out with this one because he loathes you more than you loathe him." And you know, Crowley goes, "What did you tell him?" Kevin goes, "Everything!" Bobby says that Crowley was, as you said, a tailor who sold his soul for an extra three inches on his dick. And Crowley goes, "Well, I'm just trying to hit double digits." So true! [C: Real.] Bobby also says, "And I know where you're buried." And he calls Dean, and Dean's like, "Hi, Crowley! We're in Scotland right now." And we pan over to Sam and Dean, who are in Scotland right now, and there's a castle behind them so you know they're in Scotland right now, and they're digging up a grave, and they go, "Oh, we've gone international. In fact, we're in your neck of the woods." Do you need a visa to go to the UK?

C: I don't know. [muttering, typing] No.

G: No?

C: No.

G: Oh, you are permitted to go without a visa! That's cool as hell! Dean asks like, "Did you really used to wear a skirt?" Crowley goes, "I had very athletic calves." Anyway, they explain that what they're doing is they're digging up his bones, and they're going to burn that thing. And Crowley says, "Well, it's a myth. You can't kill me by burning my bones." But Bobby goes, "I know an employee of yours that would disagree," and then we flash back to the demon and realize that what's inside those bag? Human bones, and they're her bones, and Bobby burned them to kill her. RIP! Bobby has this speech about how like, "You think you're so special? You're just a ghost, but worse!" Anyway, Dean [laughs] does this thing where he's like, flicking the lighter over and over again. And then he goes, "You hear that, Crowley? That's me flicking my BIC for you." And I went, "Ew!" [C: Yeah.] Kind of disgusting. But okay. Eventually, Crowley accepts his fate, and he lets Bobby go from his contract. And Bobby makes a comment about leaving the thing with the legs in, and he does. "Pleasure doing business with you."

C: Sam and Dean are still in Scotland, and Crowley has teleported towards them. Dean's like, "Maybe I'll just light your bones on fire anyway!" But Sam closed the lighter, and he goes, "Dean, he's a dick, but a deal's a deal." And Crowley tells Sam like, "Fuck you. I don't need you to fight my battles for me." I think that's supposed to be another hint that Sam is soulless, because his whole thing before was that he hates Crowley so much and wants to kill him every second they're together. Crowley disappears, and they do a shot of Scotland, where they pan out to the castle and like, the woods and shit. [laughs] [G: So true.] Don't know why.

G: I mean, they don't know how to show anything. [laughs] I do think the bit where Dean is driving on the other side is very fun.

C: Right. So Dean's driving on the wrong side of the road. He's on the phone with Bobby, and Bobby says, "Thank you for doing that, especially because I know you hate flying." Dean's like, "No, it's cool. I love riling up Crowley and shit." And Sam says that Dean was so nervous and puked four times, and Dean says that if some nut job decided to try something, he was going to attack them with a fork. [laughs] So Dean's afraid of flying because he thinks 9/11 is going to happen again? It's not because it's just like, it's really high up in the air??

G: Is that what it implies?

C: He says that what he was afraid of was like, somebody trying to attack him, right?

G: Yeah.

C: So I thought 1.04, he was just saying that humans aren't supposed to be that high up or something.

G: Yeah. But now they're like, "He's afraid because he's afraid that someone's going to be a terrorist in the plane"?

C: Yeah.

G: I thought what they were doing here was that, "Oh, yeah, Dean's afraid of flying, and it's made him paranoid in all other aspects."

C: That could be it.

G: Yeah. Just like when you were flying, and I was like, "What if the plane crashes or Crystal chokes on a cracker or something?" [C laughing] So true.

C: Those Biscoffs are really dry, and I don't like them. I know that's not a popular opinion, but I don't like Biscoffs. I think they're bad.

G: I like them. I'll eat them.

C: Okay. I'll bring them all to you.

G: Thank you.

C: Bobby's like, "I'm sorry for what I said earlier," and Sam's like, "No, you're right! We take you for granted!" Dean's like, "You've been helping us for so long, and we would be dead without you!" And then Bobby says, "Okay, then. Let's roll credits on this chick flick." And I guess I was literally just making fun of them for having emotions earlier, too, but it wasn't gendered, and that's why I'm better. [laughs]

G: Or is it?

C: Or is it?

G: When were we making fun of them having emotions?

C: By saying it in a silly voice. [both laugh]

G: Oh, okay.

C: I think maybe my silly voice is gendered, though. Like, it's higher pitched than my regular voice. Maybe I am the same.

G: I think it's supposed to show childishness. A child would have a higher voice.

C: That's true. Okay, but when we do valley girl accents when we're making fun of them, I think that is gendered.

G: What is a valley girl accent?

C: Like, "[honestly sounds more New York than valley girl] Oh my god!" or whatever. No, not that.

G: This is the first time I've heard you use that voice.

C: Not exactly that, but like, I don't think that was a valley girl accent. I need to review what a valley girl accent is.

G: I think you have a valley girl accent just fundamentally.

C: In general?

G: Yeah? You think that's not true?

C: I don't think that's true. [G: Okay.] Maybe it's true. Yeah, so Bobby says that- No, you're right. They are weird about Scotland because he says, "Try some of the local grub. I hear it's exotic." What does that mean?

G: Yeah. They have that sausage thing, right? It's blood or something? Which is normal schnormal in many places.

C: Yeah, I don't know. Something. Dean's just going to Olive Garden. Good call. Their all you can eat deal is good.

G: You know what? They should have said they should try the whiskey there, which they should have. They're whiskey enthusiasts!

C: That's true. The thing is, they just drink to have alcohol. I don't think they're that into having like good stuff. [G: Fancy stuff.] After finally hanging up, Bobby has cut out a piece of the cobbler. He's sat down with his fork. He's ready to eat it, but the phone rings. And he answers it, and it's back to same old, same old, pretending to be the FBI. And it's so sad that he'll never be able to eat the cobbler because he never learned how to fucking multitask. [G: Yeah.] The end!

G: I mean it also- I think it's supposed to be like, "Yeah, same old, same old, but he doesn't have this burden burdening him anymore." [C: That's true.] Which is nice.

C: He doesn't have this burden burdening him anymore, but he'll also never have a normal life where he gets to eat a cobbler! And that woman won't go out with him because he's a hunter, and he sprayed her all with blood.

G: I mean, I think no, the point is that, you know, you can have this life-changing thing happen to you, and you just go back to your life, and it's still your life, which is pretty nice, I think.

C: Yeah. But the fact that he's like, "Oh, of course this is how it turns out" when she turns down his "I'll come over for dinner" thing.

G: But he's not like, upset. He's not upset at this point in this episode.

C: He's not upset, but I think that the general whole thing is like, you're supposed to feel bad for him because he can't have a normal life, and that normal life by woman thing, you know?

G: Are you? I think it's excellent when someone is pursuing you, or you're pursuing someone, and it falls apart, and you're like, "Now it's done, and I can go back to my life." [laughs] which is what's happening to Bobby.

C: So you think he was really, really happy about it?

G: Well, I mean, he was- I think there is a feeling of like, "Oh, new thing, new thing, new thing. My new thing's over. I can go back to my life."

C: But he's not happy about it.

G: Is he not? He looks fine.

C: [laughing] He's upset during the episode. He's often upset.

G: No, he's upset because there's this fucking time that's ticking for him, and his soul is gonna be taken to Hell and tortured forever, and now that's done, and he's fine.

C: Yeah, no, it's done, it's fine, but he also can't eat a cobbler, and he's been trying to for many times throughout the episode.

G: This is true. But I thought it was like, you know, like at the end of a sitcom, and you're like, "Silly me!" Like that kind of thing. [laughs]

C: I think we're supposed to be sad about it.

G: Really? Who even likes a peach cobbler?

C: Because he tries so much to eat the cobbler. It's a real storyline.

G: Just take a bite while you answer the phone.

C: I agree, and I think that they could have done that as like a, "He's still able to have joys and little things in life while pursuing this life," but like, they don't have him do that to be like, "His life is so hard."

G: I think it would be fine if he delivers a sentence and then takes a bite, which I think will be fun!

C: I agree, but they didn't, because they were trying to say something else.

G: Yeah. Well, that's it for this episode. [both laugh]

-

G: Best Line/Worst Line?

C: It's- yeah. God! There were lines? I'm sure I laughed at points.

G: I do love Rufus this episode, so I think my best line should go to him.

C: Oh yeah!

G: I would say I love when Bobby goes, "Woodchipper," and Rufus takes a pause and goes, "Okey-dokey. Woodchipper. That can do it." They're very cute.

C: He's so charming! [G: Yeah.] I like when Bobby says that he's not asking for Rufus's help, and Rufus says, "I ain't asking for your permission."

G: Yeah, that is good. And you know what? I do think it's fascinating that both of them play the role of like, grumpy old guy, but Rufus is charming and charismatic, and Bobby's just there. [both laugh] I'm so sorry. It's true, though.

G: Yeah. It's because Rufus smiles, and Bobby doesn't.

G: Yeah, Rufus is like, he's more expressive, I suppose, [C: Yeah.] in both the bad and the good aspects of his feelings.

C: And Rufus is also hot, and Bobby isn't. [both laugh]

G: Yeah, well, worst line. I don't like when the demon is flirting with Bobby, 'cause Bobby's not hot. [both laugh]

C: [laughing] And that's the only reason. I think there's like- When Dean says that- well, that's in character, but when he says he's "baring his soul like a frigging girl" in combination with Bobby bringing out the chick flick line at the end.

G: Yeah, they do love to do that. [C: Yeah.] Spreadsheets?

C: Yeah. Alright. Misogyny? It's there.

G: It's there. Two? I do think Dean and Bobby's girl comments and then the portrayal of the demon, so.

C: And also Marcy.

G: Oh, yeah! I suppose Marcy, the thing that they do with Marcy is fundamental to the episode. [C: Yeah. 3?] So I would say a 3.

C: Yeah. Racism?

G: I don't think so.

C: I don't think so. Well, was the okami a little bit? I don't know.

G: Oh. Yes, I would say 1 point.

C: Alright, 1 point.

G: We're allowed. We're Busty Asian Beauties: A Supernatural Commentary Podcast.

C: Yeah. [both laugh] We're allowed to overweight things that happen with Asian people. Just like our breasts.

G: Just like our what?

C: I said our breasts.

G: Ugh!

C: We can cut that. Homophobia. Is the making fun of Crowley for wearing a skirt thing- I don't know. Homophobia and transmisogyny is always pretty combined in Supernatural.

G: I'll give it a 1.

C: IMDb. People like this episode. I know that people like this episode. Do they like it enough to stop hating Season 6 so much? It's like, back to regular Supernatural rating.

G: Well, I'm the first one who's going to guess, and I would say yes. I'm giving this an 8.6.

C: Okay. I was thinking 8.5, but also, that might be, I don't know, I think I want to go higher, because I feel like I know this episode's really liked. But also, every time we've gone high, it's been wrong 'cause people hate Season 6. I'll just go with my initial instinct of 8.5.

G: Okay, let's see. Ha.

C: Watch it be a fucking 9.

G: It's a 9.1.

C: We're so wrong about everything, always.

G: Well, I'm righter, so.

C: Yeah. [laughs] Okay, people really love this episode. People do like it when you go outside of the typical format.

G: Yeah. "Absolute gem of Season 6. The second best episode overall."

C: What's the first?

G: Overall what? Over all of the show? [C: Maybe.] They said that gag with Garth is wonderful. So true. I do love it. I suppose that is also a favorite line of mine if I were to choose two.

C: Yeah, that was fun. Yeah. "Bobby and Crowley were such a good break from the boys. I love them, but sometimes it's a bit much." Real. "There are some very disturbing scenes (the demon execution in Bobby's basement) and some very funny scenes (the woman)."

G: What the fuck is the woman?

C: Marcy? Do they mean Marcy? [G laughs]

G: They love the movie Drag Me to Hell and is very glad that it was mentioned.

G: "The only thing I'm asking myself: Does this episode solve the problem Dean and Sam had all Season 2 in just one Episode?" What the fuck was your problem in Season 2?

C: Like they could burn Azazel’s bones?

G: Oh. Hell yeah. They could. But isn't Azazel a Prince of Hell?

C: Crowley is the king of Hell.

G: No, but like, a Prince of Hell means you're old as fuck.

C: Oh, maybe.

G: Yeah. They were going international.

C: Oh my god, wait! This is so fun! Someone rated this 10 out of 10, said "I'd been waiting for this and didn't know it," and then at the end, they say, "Now can someone tell me if there's one like it for Castiel? That would be worth continuing to watch..." I can't wait for this person to have probably already gone to "Man Who Would Be King."

G: Yeah. Let's give it a like. I'll make it helpful. Oh, no, it's asking me to sign up for an account! [C: You need an account.] Fuck off!

C: Oh my god, this is their only review on IMDb.

G: Oh my god, they reviewed "We Go Together." "We Go Together"? They review- [C: What?] No, sorry. I thought they reviewed Much Ado About Nothing [both laughing], but I'm just looking at my recently viewed.

C: Incredibly funny. My last ones before the last two Supernatural episodes are Crazy Rich Asians, Jimmy O. Yang, and Love Hard. [both laugh]

G: No, yeah. We can see the journey and the destination.

That’s it for this episode of Busty Asian Beauties. Next week, we will be discussing Season 6, Episode 5: "Live Free or Twihard." [C: Hell yeah.] Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts.

C: Follow us on social media! We are on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com. And... wait, I didn't open our sticky note for what this last part is. I thought I knew it. I don't. Our official tag is #BABPod, B-A-B-POD. Thanks to everyone who's donated to our Ko-Fi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod, which is where our outtakes live, and check out our merch at babpod.redbubble.com.

G: You can email us any feedback, comments, or inquiries at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com. See you guys next time! [both] Bye!

[guitar music]

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

hello babpals no episode this week due to being so sleepy sleepy tired during our supposed recording schedule. see you all next week for the one about aliens! (for real this time)

-grey <3

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 112: Why Did Lucky The Dog Cross the Road? To Get to Purgatory

Today, Crystal & Grey discuss Supernatural 6.08 - All Dogs Go To Heaven. We talk about: Adventures in Leather Jacket-ing, if you can leave a sick child to walk a dog, and Crowley being a little bit mean :(

Ko-fi

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[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 111: Soulless Sam is Literally Fine

Today, Crystal & Grey discuss Supernatural 6.07 - Family Matters. We talk about: Dean Winchester's attack dog, incessantly talking about Sam's potential hotness, and whether Samuel and Castiel is the new Sastiel.

Episode 111 Outtakes: Sherlock's Daddy

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[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Our yearly tradition of discussing our Spotify Wrapped for a shockingly long time....... is OUT!*

Thank you so much to everyone who has us in their top 5 and especially their top 1 listened podcasts this year. Much much love as always, and kudos for sticking around!

*Yes as a lesbian!! which she's always been!

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

just wanted to say that you were in the top 5 podcasts on my spotify wrapped! thank you for all the laughs 🫶 i’ve really enjoyed reliving the epic highs and lows of supernatural through your podcast without having to actually watch all the shitty episodes lol

omg yayyyy thank you for listening!!! we will always be here to protect you from the shitty episodes by saying everything that happens in them beat by beat

- Crystal :)

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

WE WILL BE BACK

episode this week is late but WILL be released.... we are NOT taking an extended break we are just committing acts of suspense entirely precedented by our podcast history

-grey

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

just listened to the SPN 6x06 not-aliens episode and never watched tori & dean but it's the same vibes as a lot of E! reality shows popular in the 2000s where the premise is "see the inner lives of one vapid, famous rich blonde couple". like kardashians, but just one crumbling marriage instead of a whole family and usually one of them was a singer or actor. jessica simpson and her husband had one, britney spears and kevin federline, kristin cavallari, etc. tori was the famous one who used to act in a WB show called 90210. 

anyways, almost every marriage that had a tv show about them has divorced though because why would you put your lives on camera if there wasn't conflict or drama? looks like tori & dean lasted long enough to have a few spinoffs before they called it quits though I guess so good for them, get that bag, etc.

besides the few memes that some of them generated most of them were seen as pretty lowbrow unintelligent TV in addition being generally something only for women (and if you watched those as a man you had to be gay, because real men watched other trash reality TV like mtv's jackass or something.) a little silly for sure, reality TV is just reality TV at the end of the day and those shows wouldn't have been popular if some straight men weren't watching too.

all that said the fact that known bisexual old man bobby singer canonically binged the show is so important to me. rip bobby, you would have loved the real housewives.

tysm for this explanation and your expertise! in the world where he and rufus both grow to be even older men they should've taken opposite sides in the tori and dean divorce and slept on separate couches about it

- Crystal :)

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

hiiiiiiiiii sorry folks no episode this week due to scheduling conflicts and whatnot! - Crystal :)

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

killed in bed, brother mad at him for going to a thanksgiving dinner, brother mad at him for hanging out with a dog, brother mad at him for going to college, resurrected, brother throws away the present he gave him for christmas when they were kids...he came into the apocalypse mad as hell

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 110: Cunty Diva Voice

Today, Crystal & Grey discuss Supernatural 6.06 - You Can't Handle The Truth. We talk about: Jim Beaver's wikifeet, Sam's sicko face, and realizing why Thelma and Louise were wearing hair scarfs.

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[bustyasianbeautiespod]

I think you may have been asked this before, but what later seasons characters are y'all most excited to get to?

Hello!! Personally when I first watched Supernatural, Charlie held the specialest place in my heart as I'm sure is true for the wide array of 13 year old lesbians who watched Supernatural. I am also a massive fan of Rowena, and later seasons Rowena even more so, so that one feels like I'm excited for two characters in one.

I think bringing back Claire is one of the best things Supernatural ever did. Alongside this is bringing back Mary. I am also excited for these two.

And of course, Jack truly is wonderful and an incredible addition to Supernatural. My attachment to him (and by extension I think Mary also) is less nostalgia driven given how I watched Supernatural the first go around (quit after s12 due to the Miseries) and I am interested in how revisiting them would differ from revisiting Charlie and Co.

I think overall many of the recurring characters of Supernatural are quite fun and interesting. Even the ones I don't have a strong attachment to and/or don't feel is a particularly great storyline addition (garth, kevin, metatron the most hilarious guy in the world, hannah, billie) are still pretty fun and lovable or at least enjoyable. It may actually be easier to list the ones I don't like, I feel. (benny (I'm a hater), more of meg 2.0 (but I'm willing to change my mind), the bmol (lets kill them), donatello (you will never be kevin), asmodeous (but he was admittedly very funny for calling dean with cas' voice))

-Grey :}}}

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 109: It's Okay To Be Gay As Long As You're Straight

Today, Crystal & Grey discuss Supernatural 6.05 - Live Free or Twihard. We talk about: how you either be gay or a straight vampire, Sam's Count Dracula Impression, and Dean being more of a werewolf looking kind of guy.

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[bustyasianbeautiespod]

You guys were wondering on a recent ep why people decided that The Night We Met was a destiel song, and then I forgot about it until I heard my sister listen to that song just now, but. I think it was specifically a combination of, yes, the fact that it was the song of the day in the writers room and the fact that we knew there was going to be a scene in a barn in the finale, and people assumed it was going to be the barn from Lazarus Rising. People undoubtedly would have assumed the song was about destiel anyway, but I think the barn thing is why it got so big. Well, that and the indescribable mental state of Nov 5-19 2020 in which everything was about destiel

oh my fucking god i have completely forgotten about that damn barn. what a time in our collective lives.

- Grey

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 107 Transcript: Supernatural - We Will Find A Way

[intro guitar music]

G: Hello, it's Grey.

C: Hello, it's Crystal.

G: And this is Busty Asian Beauties, a Supernatural commentary podcast where I, someone who has seen this show many, many times...

C: And I, someone who only knows the show through social media, discuss every single episode of Supernatural from start to finish. Also, we are both Asian.

G: Both Asian! For today's episode, we are discussing Season 6, Episode 3: "The Third Man," written by Ben Edlund [C: Boo.] and directed by Robert Singer. This episode is horrible! [laughs] No, this episode is very racist. [C: Yeah.] Yeah. Last episode, Crystal was like, "I think Cas is like, racist next episode." And I was like, "Hmm. I wonder what that means." And then I watched this episode, and as every single piece slowly fell into place like a Tetris game, [C laughs] I was like, "Oh, no!" [laughs] This episode is egregiously racist! Ben Edlund, I'll kill you! [C laughs] Sorry. I probably shouldn't say stuff like that, again, because of everything.

C: In case he dies of suspicious circumstances?

G: Yeah. And they track down this episode.

C: You'll have an alibi. You'll be out of the country.

G: I will have never stepped foot to the United States. But what if he dies during a vacation to the Philippines, Crystal? Let's consider all of our fucking situations.

C: When Ben Edlund goes to the Philippines, I'll buy you a plane ticket to come to the US to visit me. [G laughs]

G: Yeah, we have to plan it very early on because the visa applications is going to be one hell of a thing. Like, they'll interview me, and I'll go, "Oh, it's because Ben Edlund is going to the Philippines, [C laughs] and I'm afraid that people will think I'll kill him if he dies here." And they'd be like, "What the fuck?"

C: Yeah, or they'll be like, "I completely understand. I hate that guy, too. Go to the US."

G: No, but he's always going to have the benefit of the doubt for being a US citizen! [C: Mm. True.] Unfortunate. [C: Unfortunate.] Well, he's extending his repertoire this episode from good old-fashioned misogyny to good old-fashioned racism. [both laugh]

C: What's neo-racism?

G: I think- You know what? I think all of it is good old-fashioned. They haven't invented new ones. They're just repurposing old ones over and over again.

C: Yeah, that seems to be the case.

G: Yeah, so that's kind of our content warning for this episode. There's going to be discussions of police brutality, but also specifically discussions of how Supernatural used this storyline in ways that are completely insensitive and also egregious. [C: Yeah.] And also specifically, it's like, antiblack racism, just to be clear. [C: Yeah.] What did you know about this episode before going in, by the way?

C: I knew about the shot where Cas falls out of a window [G: Of course.] onto Sam's car while fighting an angel because it's in the-

G: While biting?

C: While fighting an angel. [laughs]

G: Ah, okay. Well, he should have bit him. Yeah.

C: Because it's in the Cas "What the Hell" AMV.

G: Of course. [C: Of course.] I do love that shot so much when like, it goes down, like, the camera's above, and then it it pulls back up to be behind Sam and Dean. It's pretty fun!

C: Yeah. They paid a lot of money to make that shot happen, I feel.

G: Yeah. Do you think it's more or less money than the crane shot with Cas in Season 4, "When the Levee Breaks"?

C: Probably more. [G: Probably more.] I don't know how showbiz works. Somebody let us know. [both] Robert Singer- [laughs]

G: No, yeah. That was a Robert Singer episode, yeah.

C: - if you're listening to this, let us know.

G: There was a reverse Robert Singer zoom this episode, and I did find it incredibly amusing. When Cas would transfer places [C: True.], the one specifically where he kidnaps that kid and takes his body to the motel room to torture. Dean is like, "Wait, why are you taking that kid?" And Cas goes, "Portability." And then it's like so close to his face, and then it zooms out, and they're back in the motel. Yeah. [C: Yeah.] So Robert Singer’s playing with his stuff. Good for him.

C: Yeah. Good for him. And then the other thing is that there's a young Black kid who- I thought he got possessed by an angel, but no, he was just spoken to by an angel, and I knew that Cas would leave him somewhere for the cops to find in a way that would not be pleasant for this child.

G: Yeah. Have you- what do you know about Balthazar? I did not expect that he was gonna be here. I knew the moment they mentioned the staff of Moses, but like, here, before watching the episode, I didn't know he was gonna be here already. I didn't know he comes in that early.

C: Well, he's Cas's ex-boyfriend in a lot of human AUs. [laughs]

G: Yeah. That's true.

C: I knew that he was British. I knew that he would be the one who sends them to the show in "The French Mistake" and that, at some point, Cas is gonna say that someone has an oak tree up their ass and "bite me," and that he learned that from his friend, and that friend was Balthazar.

G: Yeah, this is true. I don't like Balthazar. I don't like his British accent. I'm Anglophobic.

C: What about Crowley?

G: Well, I love Crowley, so, you know, he transcends that. [C: Mm-hm.] And he hates Celine Dion? Fuck that guy. Those are all my- I always forget that his name is Balthazar. The actor's name is Sebastian Roche, and I always think that Balthazar's name is Sebastian.

C: He does look like a Sebastian.

G: He does look like a Sebastian. Is he actually British? Did I just insult his real accent? Probably.

C: Oh, probably. Like, why would they make him put on a fake British accent? [both laugh] Wait, he's French-American?

G: He's French American?

C: [laughing] Why did they make him put on a fake British accent? [both laughing]

G: Does he have a fake British accent, or does he have a French-American accent?

C: Does he have a different accent that I don't know? [G: I don't know.] "Balthazar Supernatural..." maybe I just completely forgot! Somebody says he has a Scottish-French accent. Is that true?

G: Does the Scottish-French accent just go directly to British? Is that what the result of those two accents is?

C: IMDb says he's Scottish-French, but Wikipedia says he's American-French. Maybe this is his real accent.

G: Yeah, probably. It is a possibility.

C: Sorry.

G: Sorry, Sebastian. I also have to try very hard to not call your character Sebastian for this entire season, probably.

C: I don't think I was paying enough attention when he spoke to remember what his accent was. I'm sorry to all the people of Scotland for calling that accent British unless it sounded British, in which case I'm not sorry.

G: Yeah. Should we stop making fun of people's accents, just like Supernatural does and then also did with that German guy? [C laughs]

C: Yeah, I guess.

G: There's a possibility that we should, yeah. Unfortunate. I love doing it!

C: Who else have we made fun of the accent of? [both laugh]

G: [laughs] Sorry! I think at some point, we called for racism against Irish people by making fun of their accent.

C: [laughs] Yeah, I did call for hibernophobia. [G: Yeah.] [laughing] I'm gonna renounce my formerly hibernophobic ways.

G: Yeah. Also, it's rich coming from me. So we really should stop doing- [laughs]

C: Well, your accent is beautiful, so.

G: I know! That's the main difference between me and the French-American-Scottish accent. [both laugh] Sorry!

C: Did he roll an r once, though?

G: It was definitely not a Scottish accent. [C laughs] We have heard David Tennant talk enough in YouTube videos, TV shows, and our dreams [C: There are different parts of Scotland.] to know that that's not a Scottish accent!

C: Maybe in your dreams. [laughs]

G: No, yeah, he was in my dream, and it was pretty bad. [C: Yeah, well.] He was a gym teacher, and we made out. [laughing]

C: You're not keeping this in, are you?

G: No, I'm keeping that one in. [C laughing] The people should know. [C: Okay!] And even in the dream, I was like, "Ugh! Yucky!" [both laughing]

-

C: There's a "Road So Far."

G: I enjoyed the "Road So Far" for this episode. The first few seconds is recapping the first ep and the second ep, and then once they have finally established that, we go to Cas, and like, the voice clip they use for Cas is in 4.18, “Monster at the End of This Book,” if I'm correct. When he's telling Dean like, "Monsters are fierce. [C: Archangels.] They're absolute. They're Heaven's most terrifying weapon." What did I say?

C: You said monsters.

G: [laughs] Well, monsters are fierce. But yeah, he's saying, "Archangels are fierce. They're absolute." I think, even in 4.18, I have already said that I absolutely love this delivery. Yeah. And then they show a little bit of Raphael. They show the part where Raphael goes, "Castiel, I'm warning you. Do not leave me here. I will find you," and I am once again reminded of how fucking cool the voicing that the actor did for Raphael is. [C: He's so good.] I think, if I'm not mistaken, this is the last time we will see this specific actor for Raphael.

C: Yeah, 'cause this vessel is fucked.

G: His next vessel is gonna be a woman, I'm pretty sure.

C: No, but we see him in flashbacks in "Man Who Would Be King."

G: Oh, this is true! That's why I was like, "I think we still have Raphael scenes with this guy as the vessel." But yeah, you're right. There's going to be flashback scenes. But like, I think in his current scenes, he's going to be in a female vessel. And then, you know, Cas goes up to Heaven, and then he- like, the last line is about how he wants to go back up because it's going to be total anarchy up there. We start the episode- This scene, okay, just to preface, I'm trying to live my life better. I watched this episode, no knitting. I literally put my knitting physically away so that I can focus on watching the episode. Congratulations to me, and you're welcome to everyone. I was shrieking when this scene was happening. It's very well done in terms of like, the makeup and prop and everything. I think it's excellent.

C: Yes. They did a really good job.

G: I mean, last episode, they also did a very good job with the horror aspect of the episode, and I am enjoying this portion that Supernatural is doing where they're trying to recover themselves as a good old-fashioned monster hunting show. Maybe that's why the racism is back. [both laugh] No, but what is with the racism this season? We're like, 3 episodes in.

C: Well, Sera Gamble has a pretty bad rap.

G: Yeah, this is true. Is it Sera Gamble’s fault? [C: Maybe.] It probably is. Anyway, the scene is, there's this police officer, he's like, in the locker room, and he is washing his face, and he's patting his face dry, and then there's like a little nick on the side of his face, and he's like, "Oh, I nicked myself shaving or whatever." And then as he keeps on going, he notices that even more of his skin is red and bleeding, so he touches it, and then, like the skin just sloughs off. How is that pronounced? [both] Sloffs? Sloughs off. And there's just this giant patch that literally falls on the fucking sink. And he just has a giant red hole on his face. Not hole, like, it's his skin, but like, below it. Like, the muscular part of his face. And then he starts freaking out. He takes a step back, and like, the skin of his foot is like, left on the floor. It's wonderful! It's like, wonderful to look at. It's completely fucking horrifying. And then he starts bleeding through his shirt, just like me for real. There's blood in his mouth, blood in his face, everything. And then he turns around, and he sees- there's a police officer. He's gonna be relevant later. His name's Ed. And he just goes, "Ed, I think I'm bleeding." He tries to take a step forward, and the camera is now just like, on Ed, and then we see a splatter of blood, like, a fine mist of blood go to his face. And then we go to his feet, and it's like, it's bloody, and then it pans slowly towards where the body is, or the quote-unquote "body," because it's just a pile of clothes and disintegrated flesh. It's just all blood. [C: Hell yeah.] Very fun. Wonderful! It really is amazing to look at. They did a really good job with this one. I like that they have consistently been doing good teaser- or, what's that called? The cold open. It's been consistently good. So that's fun.

C: It is.

-

C: So Dean wakes up in Lisa's house, and they're spooning or whatever, and then they start making out, and maybe having sex. But then Dean wakes up. He was, in fact, [G: It wasn't real!] having a sex dream, and he's sleeping in the Impala.

G: Every time there's a sex scene in Supernatural- because this one, it is a sex scene. They make a point of like showing the like, hands and whatever, which is, of course, what makes a sex scene a sex scene. [C: Yeah. #Lesbianism.] Yeah, but like, they do that, [laughs] and I always think about that one IMDb review that was like, "Oh, yeah, your wife says that Sam Winchester is her favorite character. Yeah, I bet, after this sex scene where he fucks this woman so good." [both laughing] And like, I can't help but think like, "Oh, this is like some sort of pandering to someone who wants to fuck Dean Winchester."

C: Yeah. Or who wants to fuck Cindy Sampson.

G: This is true. Why not Lisa, Crystal?

C: You're right. 'Cause you said the character name, and I said the actress name. You're right. I'm so sorry. [G: Boo!] Who wants to fuck Lisa or Cindy Sampson, or Jensen Ackles, or Dean Winchester. A lot of options here. Meanwhile, what else is happening in the world of sex is-

G: [laughs] No, this is hilarious! The cut to Sam working out? I did scream. I was like, "Love it!" Good for him.

C: Yeah, he's sweating a lot, but I think in the world of the making of Supernatural, they probably just dumped a bunch of lube on Jared Padalecki.

G: Is that the case? You can just do oil. [C: True.] I feel like lube, what it is and how it works, it's probably just going to look goopy on the skin. That's why they use it for holy water because it like, beads up. So this is probably baby oil.

C: No, that's true. You're right. I'm so sorry. Look at me, making blunder after blunder today!

G: Maybe it's macadamia nut oil, Crystal. [C laughs]

C: Maybe so. And he's doing push-ups, sit-ups. Later, he's doing chin-ups, which must be hard if his hands are all oiled up.

G: I think there was a time in my life where I was disgusted by Sam Winchester's half-naked body [C laughs] because there is this implication that I should be attracted to it, and I'm like, "Ugh!" [C: Yeah.] But now, I think I'm able to appreciate a muscular male figure for what it is, which is a fun, interesting thing to look at. [C: Huh.] It is very interesting. He has like a vee. You know the vee. You know what I'm talking about.

C: Like, below his neck?

G: No! Like, near his crotch. What is that called? The vee line in his like, hips?

C: [laughing] Why do I only know them as cum gutters? [both laugh] [G: What?] [laughing] I only know them as- Are you talking about the cum gutters?

G: It's called the gutter?

C: [laughing] It's called the cum gutter. [G: No!] I'm sure there's another term for it.

G: I refuse. I steadily refuse to accept this saying.

C: I'm sure there's another. Okay. The iliac furrows.

G: Do you ever think about the fact that that area is called the love handles? What the fuck [laughs] is that about?

C: Well, you grab onto them when you have sex.

G: When you make love, Crystal. [C laughs]

C: You're right. So sorry. Third apology of the night.

G: I think it would be terrifying to see a 6 foot 4 man in the wild. Do you think that's true? You have seen, probably, a 6 foot 4 man. [C: Probably. I don't remember.] I don't think I have. Yeah. Oh, so it didn't leave an impression?

C: Yeah. I mean, currently, Grant O'Brien is now my idea of what a really really tall guy is, so Sam Winchester is whatever.

G: What is Grant? He's 6'7?

C: He's 6'9.

G: Holy shit. [C laughs] [C: Yes.] He's the guy who makes the cocktails, right? [C: Yes.] Oh, god! Well, good for him! [C: Good for him.] I'm sure he's not terrifying in any way whatsoever.

G: Yeah, I mean, people mock him for his height every time he's on a video, so.

G: Yeah. Rhett McLaughlin is 6'7, I think. [C: Who?] The guy from Good Mythical Morning. Keep up, Crystal.

C: Oh. I thought you said "Reth"! I didn't know who that was.

G: Yeah, no, I have trouble pronouncing his name at all times. [laughs] [C: I understand.] No, you see, I was specifically talking about people who are 6'4. So Jared Padalecki, nobody else. He's working out. It's very fun. He's really working those muscles. Apparently, after you work out, your muscles are like, extra like big. Like, they look like, big. So like this is a convenient thing way to do it, I suppose. Like, just have him do chin-ups before he has his scene where he's showing off his body.

C: A hot woman comes out of the bathroom, and she's like, "Oh my god! You're so hot, and you're so good at sex! You're the best at sex I've ever ever ever had!"

G: "Do you want to hang out again later?" And Sam's just completely silent.

C: Yeah. He's making a sicko mode face or something. [both laugh] He's not answering any of her questions. He has like this slight smirk/glare combination, but it's so slight that it has no energy or emotion behind it. Yeah, so she heads out, and then Sam clears his throat [G: Sam ahems.], still not saying anything, and then hands her some cash. And this is how you know Sam is soulless because he paid for a sex worker, and that's evil! [both laugh]

G: Literally!

C: God. Yeah. And then the woman says, like, "Oh, and by the way, hey, here's my phone number. You're so hot and good at sex that the next time, we can just have sex without any money being involved." And Sam goes, "Okay." And then as soon as she leaves, he throws her phone number into the trash. [G: Love that.] What is that?

G: What is Supernatural thinking?

C: Yeah, what are they saying? [laughs]

G: No, yeah. What are they saying?

C: If the point is like, Sam's not interested in romance, you can have one-night stands without romance.

G: She was not offering romance.

C: And she was also not offering romance. She was just like, "That was a good enough time that I wouldn't need you to pay."

G: Maybe it's just he moves around a lot. It's still the same logic in Season 2. "Oh, I move around a lot!" But now, he also is soulless, so he's like, "And I don't give a fuck about you, specifically."

C: Yeah. But I mean, Supernatural has established that it's icky for Sam or Dean to pay for sex because they're so good and hot that they can just get it by themselves. But like, in this one, it's still like, "He's so good at sex and hot."

G: Yeah, so he can get a sex worker's sex for freeeeee! Which is what they're doing, yeah.

C: Yeah. But also, yeah, I don't know. It's just like, I guess he just doesn't want to put the effort in to chat anybody up, whatever whatever.

G: Yeah. Literally no chatting.

C: Yeah. Not a word except for "okay" at the end once.

G: Yeah. He should have said, "Okey-dokey!" and the woman would've been like, "Hell yeah."

C: Yeah, she would have taken her number back. [G laughs] The phone rings. It's Dean, who's like- I think he's swinging by the Campbells, but Sam says that he's in Easter, Pennsylvania, doing a case because all he does is work. He doesn't take breaks in between anymore. And he just seems really impatient with Dean on the phone, too.

G: Yeah. And also, he's hiding the fact that he doesn't sleep.

C: Does he not sleep?

G: Yeah. I'm sorry. You didn't know that? That's like, one of the hallmarks of being soulless.

C: But- wait! What does this mean physiologically?

G: No idea.

C: I don't get it. [laughs]

G: Is it the soul that needs sleep? That is a good question. It's excellent.

C: Yeah, I think it's the body! I guess not in Supernatural.

G: Yeah. It could be the soul. Have you ever tried being soulless, Crystal?

C: I guess not. I'm so sorry. [G: Yeah.] I shouldn't speak on- You have, I presume?

G: Tried being soulless? [C: Yeah.] You know what? It is a possibility that I have tried it, so ask away.

C: Well, did you have to sleep?

G: No. [both laughing]

C: Well, I'm glad we hashed that out.

G: To be fair, you don't have to sleep in general. You can just not sleep, and then you'll die, but like, you know. [C laughs]

C: Yeah. He's very curt with Dean, very just like, "I've delivered you your location. Just go there," etc. And like, it's so weird, because when he's in person with Dean, he's like, normal, right? So like, what- what is this?

G: I don't know. I think they're trying to put a thing where, when he is in front of Dean, he's pretending or whatever. But this is also technically in front of Dean, so like, what's that about?

C: Yeah. I don't know. Is it pretending? Is it like some sort of muscle memory when Dean's here that like, reminds him of the way that they usually interact?

G: That's probably maybe the case, yeah. Do you notice the end of the episode has a "Coming Soon"? [C: Yeah.] And the last scene of that sequence is like, Dean finding out that Sam is soulless-

C: I didn't watch it, but yeah.

G: Oh, okay. Well, towards the end, Dean already knows what's happening, or Dean has evidence that this is not true. But he turns towards Sam and asks, "But Sam, you'll always have my back, right?" And Sam does his Sam smile, and he goes, "[scoffs] Yeah, of course, Dean." [C laughs] And Dean looks at him angry, like, "I'm angy! And mad at you!" [C laughs] So like, I don't know.

C: [laughing] Thank you for the description.

G: Well, it is accurate! If you watch it again, you'll know for a fact that I was correct in my description. Yeah, anyway, so I think there is a sense of having to pretend in front of Dean more so when you're in person than in a call, because in a call, at least you can hide your physicality, you can hide your like body language or whatever. When you're with him in real life, you have to do the Sam Winchester smile. [C: It's true.] And Sam seems to be only capable of doing the Sam Winchester smirk nowadays.

-

G: So we go to one of those backroads- Is this a backroad?

C: Well, it says he's parked on the side of the road.

G: Well, yeah, not on the back of the road. [laughs] But like, what do you call the specific look of a road in the United States? Looks like a road, but like, it's like, weird. [laughs] I don't-

C: It's like, dirt?

G: It's not a dirt road. It's like, "Oh, yesterday, this was a dirt road, but they paved it today." [C laughs] That's what it looks like. [C: I don't know what the term is.] It's that kind of road. This cop is in a police car on the side, slightly obstructed by the leaves. Definitely obstructed if you're in a car and you're driving towards it. And he is doing the speed gun, and there's a car that passes by pretty quickly, and it's 70 miles per hour. How much is that? [C: It's not too fast.] Oh, it's 112. I think that is pretty fast. [C: Really?] Yeah. When my dad gets to 70 kilometers per hour, I'm like, "We're going to die." That's why I don't drive, by the way. Which is 43 miles per hour.

C: That's like, the local roads in my neighborhood are like, 55 miles. [laughs]

G: Yeah. A lot of the roads here are at 60, 60 kilometers per hour or 70, max speed, yeah. That's why, like, what is the point of buying a sports car in the Philippines? The roads are bad, you can't speed anywhere, you're always caught up in traffic, so. [C: Yeah.] Just buy a Dodge Charger just like Sam Winchester. [C laughs] I think a Dodge Charger is also expensive, but that's fine to buy. Anyway, this cop, I don't know. He receives a phone call. Later, we find out that this is the cop that saw the other cop die earlier. And what this cop was saying is like, "Oh, why are you calling me? He's dead. Whatever. It's not about us. We do what we do. We go to work. We go to the funeral!" And then, you know, he's just like, "It's not about us. Don't call me anymore," blah blah blah. And then we start seeing this like, point of view shot from the woods, just towards the side of the car. And later on, we realize that this is a kid sneaking about. I think, in this scene, you're supposed to think it's a monster who's going to attack, and we're finally going to see the monster physically. So it is fun when what happens next is there's this camera that zooms into the cop, and it like, instead of being bitten or whatever, attacked, he starts growing boils on his skin. Later on, we see him with no hair, no eyebrows, no nothing, and I was a bit disappointed. I was like, "You should have put in the hair." [C laughs] But yeah. He dies from that. Apparently, there's so many inside his throat as well, he tries to call emergency, but he couldn't speak, blah blah blah, and then he's dead.

C: Yippee!

G: Yoo-hoo!

-

C: Sam and Dean meet up, and when Dean leaves the Impala, he's in the middle of a phone call to Ben where he tells him like, "I know you're lying. Because I lie professionally, that's how." Which I think is a nice continuation of the "Dean actually does tell Ben most things, it seems." Yeah, he just says that he should tell Lisa that he broke this thing that he's lying about breaking, [laughs] and then he tells him to "take it like a man," which is also a phrase that he employed on Bobby John last episode. [G: This is true.] So I guess this is one of Dean Winchester's main parenting tools, giving people ideas of gender norms that are inaccurate. No, I mean, that's not the right way to phrase it. But who cares? Anyway, Sam's sort of laughing at him about this. They move on to talking about Dean and Lisa, and Dean's like, "Oh, Lisa is really cool about me going." And Sam just says, "Better for everybody." [laughs] It's true! And then Dean makes fun of Sam for his car a bit, [G: Yeah.] and they're being smiley and laugh-y, and just really very normal.

C: What do you think about the car?

C: Sam's car? [G: Yeah.] It's fine. It's a car. It drives. It's got wheels.

G: It is very rounded, which is, I think you notice it very distinctly when it's beside the Impala. [C: Yeah, it's cute.] And it has this little vent in the front. So fun.

C: Just like Sam in his crotch area.

G: ... Crystal. [both laugh]

C: They go to the morgue. They learn about both of these cops. They decide there's definitely a connection between them. The only witness is Officer Ed Colfax, who's the cop we saw in the cold open, so they decide to go and talk to him. He's the partner of the cop who turned into blood. [G: Yeah.] As they're driving there, [G laughs] Sam turns a corner, and then Dean immediately like, swerves, tires screeching, cuts him off to park in front of him. When they get out, Sam goes, "Were you racing me?" and Dean goes, "No, I was kicking your ass"

G: Dean does look incredibly amused by this, so good for him.

C: Yeah. [laughs] I'll allow this. He can be happy sometimes.

G: So they like, knock on the house, and the cop answers. He goes out. His name's Ed, and he is in full uniform, with the cap and everything. And Sam introduces himself as like, the fed. And, you know, "We're just going to ask questions about your guy." And Ed is very visibly in distress, and he basically does a like, "No, fuck off." And he closes the door, and Sam's like, "Mm, okay," and then he kicks the door in, and Dean is like, "Whoa, Sam, I can't believe you've done this." Inside, there's like, family photos and like, photos of him. It's just like usual family on the wall-type photos. Ed is like on the corner, on a table. He is using, I think, a knife to scratch out his face on a picture of him in uniform. And Dean is like, "Okay, weird. Well, we think your partner has been involved in foul play. Do you know any enemies of his?" And Ed says, "Well, yes." And "They both had it coming. I'll be the next to go, and then it will be over, and God will be satisfied." Yeah, he says, "God wants us all dead because of Christopher Birch." There is a thing that they do in this scene where he knocks over, I think, a whiskey bottle, and then he just lets it pour and pour and pour, which I did enjoy the visuals of. Because this scene, if they didn't do that, would be incredibly boring. [both laugh] So they were like, "Let's knock over a bottle of whiskey." And he describes Christopher Birch as having no face and a planted gun. Yeah, "a kid with no face and a planted gun." Yeah. He like, starts bleeding from under his cap, and he's like, "Oh, yeah, I've been itching a lot," and he collapses, and when Dean takes out his cap, there's cicadas inside.

C: Locusts.

G: Locusts? Are those different? I think locust is a general term.

C: They're different.

G: So Sam and Dean figure out that this is like, the fucking Egyptian plagues, but like, in small quantities, which is very fun. And also, they took one of the fucking locusts and put it in a jar. [C laughs] Would you have done that? I would definitely not.

C: No, I was like, "That thing can eat through a skull. It can definitely eat through this glass."

G: Yeah, I don't think that's true. I'm so sorry.

C: I don't think cicadas generally can do that. Most cicadas can't eat through a skull or glass, but these are clearly special cicadas.

G: Yeah. But like, even still, a skull is organic matter. [laughs] Let's not do this. It literally doesn't matter.

C: Is there like a Mohs hardness scale measurement for a skull?

G: Okay, let's look it up. [typing] "Skull in..." 5 on the Mohs hardness scale.

C: Yeah, and then glass. Glass, okay, is a 5.5 to a 6. So it depends on how strong those cicadas are, but yeah, it's not an automatic assumption that it's true, but it could happen. It's not too far off. Unless Mohs is- Is it exponential or logarithmic or however you call it?

G: It's close to being exponential.

C: Okay, then yeah, probably. Yeah, there's no real reason to think they can get through glass, then. You're right, Grey.

G: Yay! And you were able to find this truth via evidence-based reasoning. Good for us.

C: What they find out is that Christopher Birch, who the cop named was talking about earlier, was a child who was shot in the head last month during a vehicle pursuit, and all three of the cops who died were involved. And all of them filed a police report saying that they had to fire because Christopher Birch was brandishing a firearm. So yeah, they planted the gun and lied about it. I mean, Sam and Dean are both like, "Wow, that's bad." [laughs] Correct!

C: The way they do it is Dean just goes, "Oh, well, that's bad." [both laugh] He goes, "Bunch of dicks. Okay."

C: Yeah. And Sam thinks maybe really this is God or Heaven acting against these cops, which I think an interesting follow-through from like, "Houses of the Holy."

G: Yeah. And like, his reasoning is that now that the Apocalypse is done, the angels have better things to do, like kill cops.

C: Yeah. I wish. Unfortunately, our main angel of the show loves cops. Dean says, "Let's call the main angel of the show who loves cops!"

G: "And meee!" [laughs] [C: What?] No, he says, "Who loves cops, and meee!" [C laughs]

C: Yeah, he says all of that, just like that. Sam says, "Uh, he's not gonna come because I already tried."

G: "He hates me!"

C: "He only hates me!" Dean gives it a shot. He's not like, reverent about it or anything, you know. It's "Now, I lay me down to sleep. I pray to Castiel to get his feathery ass down here." And then, "Don't be a dick." But I guess what works is that he tells Cas that there's something happening down here that's like the Egyptian plagues. And Sam says, "Like I said, the son of a bitch doesn't answer." And then, "He's right behind me, isn't he?"

G: Yeah. We hear the whoosh-whoosh sound of the wings, and Sam's face changes from bemusement to anger and confusion.

C: Yeah. So Cas says, "Hello." [G: Hello!] in his Cas words, and Sam's pissed. He goes, "Hello?" and Cas goes, "Yes?" [laughs] And then Sam imitates Cas! [both] "Hello?" [laughing] And then he goes, "Hello?" And Cas goes, "That is still the term." [laughs]

G: Love him. He spent a quote-unquote "year" as a celestial- What does he call himself? A multi-dimensional wavelength of celestial intent, and his people skills are rusty!

C: Yeah. Yeah. He's very charming during this first scene. Sam goes, "So what? You like Dean better or something?" And Cas is like, "Yeah." [both laugh] [G: He's hilarious!] He goes, "Dean and I do share a more profound bond," and then turns to Dean and goes, "What? I wasn't gonna mention it," which sounds like they fucked.

G: Yeah, which sounds like they have talked about this very much so before. [C: Yeah.] It is funny that the way he poses it, it's like, "We all know this is true, but like, I wasn't gonna say it because it's impolite to say it! I was trying to be polite!" [C laughs]

C: Yeah. "You saw me. You saw me trying, Dean." [G: Yeah.] Yeah, this is a bit of a Sastiel loss, but I would say Sam imitating his voice is a Sastiel win, so really, where do we lie here?

G: I think we lie very solidly on the "They have started queerbaiting with Destiel" side.

C: Yeah. [laughs] I think that's what that is. [G: Yeah.] "Started"?

G: I mean, I would argue that Season 5, they haven't done it yet fully, but also, I argued in Season 5 that in Season 4, they haven't done it yet fully, in Season 5, they're actually doing it. And I suppose I will continue arguing that until time immemorial.

C: Yeah, until 15.18, and you're like, "It's so great how Supernatural never queerbaited once [both laugh] 'cause it's real here!"

G: No, but you think they started in Season 5.

C: Yeah.

G: I probably also think that. I'm just in denial.

C: Yeah. You remember "Cas, not for nothing, but the last time someone looked at me like that, I got laid."

G: Oh yeah, you're right! But that isn't queerbaiting. Cas really is just gay and wants to fuck Dean. [C laughs] And Dean is using it to his advantage.

C: That's true. I guess since Cas is canonically queer, anything that's just about Cas wanting to fuck Dean isn't queerbaiting, so then this isn't queerbaiting, either.

G: No, that's not-

G: The "I wasn't gonna mention it" was like, they've both talked about it.

G: No, that's not how we would define queerbaiting. As you said, right, just because Cas turned out to be gay doesn't mean that blah blah blah.

C: I agree, but you just said that [both laugh] it wasn't queerbaiting because Cas is really gay and wants to fuck Dean.

G: No, but like, Dean is trying to get something that is actually true about their dynamic, which is that Cas likes him better, and then he's just exaggerating it in a way that will make Cas feel ashamed for his attachment to Dean and where his dedication lies in the Heaven/Apocalypse situation. [C: Okay.] Like, I don't think he's saying "Cas wants to fuck me." I think he's saying that "I think Cas likes me more than is appropriate, and I'm gonna make fun of him for it and use it to my advantage."

C: Okay. The "personal space" thing in 5.03, and "My Bloody Valentine"?

G: No, yeah, that's queerbaiting. [laughs]

C: Cool. So anyway, Dean, instead of being like, "Cas, that's mean." or "Cas, you're friends with Sam." He goes, "No, but okay, I know you fucking hate Sam, and honestly, so do I, [G laughs] but remember how he went to Hell for us? You gotta answer his questions!"

G: We didn't even acknowledge that he calls it a profound bond, which ends up being the Destiel name of the-

C: The trailer.

G: Well, not just the trailer. It's a prominent thing that people say about Destiel.

C: So Cas says that he doesn't have any answers because he doesn't know who brought Sam back from the Cage. Why is he lying about this? Is it because he knows that he's soulless, so he's like, "When Dean finds out, I do not want him to blame me!" [laughs]

G: I don't think he knows that Sam is soulless. Maybe he knows something is wrong?

C: Yeah. Maybe he didn't even bring him back. He did, though.

G: He did bring him back. I think he's just trying to hide the fact that he brought him back because he's too busy to like, deal with it.

C: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah, that's fair. I do enjoy a white lie or two. Sam goes, "So it wasn't God?" Aww. [G: Mm.] And Cas is just like, "I don't know. I don't know. And also, I don't know." And then Dean goes, "Okay. If Sam is asking you a question, you just come down and tell him 'I don't know.' Just because we have a bond doesn't mean that you should only listen to me!"

G: No, this is crazy. [both laugh] Hilarious. [C: Literally.] He literally does say, "Just because we have some sort of a... a bond or something." [laughs] He says, "A bond or whatever." So true!

C: So true. He's almost as emotionally repressed as we are. [both laugh]

G: Perhaps so, yeah. We did learn it from Supernatural, allegedly. [C laughs]

C: And Cas says, "You think I came because you called?" which means that whole thing of telling Sam that he likes Deam better was completely unnecessary, [both laugh] and all he had to do was say, "No, I came down because of like the case situation."

G: "Of this thing." Yeah, he's hilarious. [C: So funny.] He was like, "Even if I didn't necessarily come down because I like Dean better, I need Sam to know that I do like Dean better. Like, that is something we need to confirm, even though that's not the reason why I'm here."

C: Yeah, he doesn't have time to do many things, such as protect a child from potential future police brutality, but he does have time for this. Alright.

So he tells Sam that Heaven didn't directly cause these killings, but the staff of Moses did, and it's gone missing. It's not being used at full capacity. He says, "I think we can rule Moses out as a suspect." Slaycay. And Sam and Dean look like he's so stupid for saying that, but when you meet real, actual, Biblical Adam in Season 15, who's going to be laughing?Nobody, because Jack is having a really bad time and gonna die.

G: Jack has a fun time with Serafina.

C: Yeah, yeah, but it's for the sake of him doing his self-sacrifice thing.

G: Yeah, this is true.

C: Yeah. Dean calls Moses's staff "Chuck Heston's disco stick." Why is Dean like, an opposite translator? He's the opposite of the Wikipedia Simple English. [both laugh]

G: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah.

C: So basically, in the chaos of the war in Heaven, a lot of powerful weapons were stolen. He needs Sam and Dean's help. And Sam's like, "Why should we do that when you won't even answer my caaaalls?" And this is when Cas does the, "Sam. Dean. My quote 'people skills' unquote are quote 'rusty,' unquote." He's doing finger quotes. It's great. "Pardon me, but I've spent the last 'year' as a multi-dimensional wavelength of celestial intent!" He's my fave, except he's not this episode. [G: Yeah.] He tells them that they should just help him to prevent people's deaths. Dean says, "Okay, let's think about motive." And they have a newspaper clipping of Christopher Birch's father calling for an investigation into his son's death.

G: Yeah, speaking of Cas being my favorite but not this episode, it is actually so fascinating, like, the entirety of my life- or not the entirety of my life, [C laughs] but when I think back to Season 6, I think, "Yeah, Cas was like in the right," because in my head, I was like, "When Dean is like in the right, that's just the show talking. That's not true." And now, like, I'm like, "No, yeah, Cas did fuck up this season." [laughs] Just from this one episode, we can fully surmise that he did fuck up this season. And later on, Dean does ask Cas pretty straightforwardly like, "Why didn't you tell us? Why didn't you call us?" which is the same question he asks at the end in "The Man Who Would Be King." Like, "You should have fucking told us." [C: Yeah.] And Cas says, "That's very nice, Dean. Where were you when I needed to hear it?" And Dean goes, "I was there! Where were you?" And then it cuts back and forth to like- Do you know that? [C: Yeah.] When Dean goes, "I was there. Where were you?" And it cuts to Cas watching him rake leaves. [C: Yeah.] Because Supernatural doesn't trust us to connect the dots in any way, shape, or form.

C: They just wanted Cas to have a gay little moment.

G: They wanted him to kiss a hundred boys in bars or something.

C: Exactly. [laughs]

G: What I'm trying to say here is I think I may have had a more benevolent look into Cas in Season 6 just because of the distance from the season. I think I've mentioned this maybe with Episode 1 of the season, but this is probably the season I remember the least about. I don't really remember much about Season 6, and I think I have colored Cas Season 6 in rose paint. That's not how that saying goes. I have put on my rose-colored glasses to look at Cas.

C: All of the red flags just look like flags.

-

G: We go to the Birches, and this one man, Darryl Birch. Also, did we mention that like, this family is Black? They don't mention it, like, Sam and Dean. You get the confirmation here, I guess, because this is a Black family. Daryl Birch is the dad, and he's like, sitting there, and he's looking at newspaper clippings, or just newspaper of like, the deaths, and then he starts cutting up the newspaper, putting it like- I don't know. He's putting it somewhere. He's getting the clippings. And then there's this kid who comes in. The kid is like, "Hey, Dad, how many times are you going to read that clipping? Like, let's just throw it out." But the dad tells him to go away. And so he does, and Sam and Dean and Cas just immediately show up in the living room. Like, literally teleport there. And then, Darryl is like, "What the fuck is this?" [laughs] and Sam goes, "We're FBI agents," which is hilarious. They immediately lead with like, "Yeah, those cops killed your kid. He didn't have a gun." And the dad says, like, "Yeah, they're all getting theirs." And Sam goes, "[aggressive] And who's giving it to them, Darryl?" [laughs] What's wrong with him?

C: [sighs] I don't know.

G: Dean goes, "Did you kill the cops?" And he goes, "No, I didn't. Look at how they died. How could I possibly kill them?" And then the kid shows up.

C: [laughs] No, first Cas says, "You smote them with the staff of Moses!"

G: Oh, yeah. He did do that. And then he goes, "Okay, let's just look for the staff. We don't need to question this guy." Then the kid shows up, and he's holding this staff like it was a gun, and then he goes, "Leave my dad alone." Later on, we'll discuss it, because Cas does leave this kid to the cops. Like, that is something that actually happens in this episode that is so egregiously bad. But like, I don't know, like this whole thing where they're like- They're also cops! Like, feds are also cops, right?

C: Yeah, they're also cops. They teleported into his house and yeah, were generally just very aggressive in their interrogation. And yeah, there's just no real sensitivity given to the fact that his son was murdered by cops, and maybe you should be a bit chiller.

G: Yeah. Internally, in the story, there's no sensitivity. Externally, in the writing of the story, they also seem to not give a fuck? Which is what's so mind-boggling to me. Because you chose to wrote this. Like, you chose to wrote this storyline. You chose to write this storyline. And so I feel like there's no reason to then be like, "I don't know." Like, [laughs] what do mean you don't know? You chose to write it! You're a show that only writes to people of color when you think it will serve your plot, and specifically because they're people of color! And so like, I don't know. There's so many- It would also be probably bad, just because this is Supernatural, if they tried to address the police brutality and specifically the antiblack brutality in in this show because of the way Supernatural is, but like, to bring it up and then do nothing with it other than to go, "We're also the bad guys, by the way. [C laughs] Like, don't worry about it." Like, what the fuck? [C laughs] What the fuck is this? And like, yeah, okay. Let's go on with what the fuck they do with this kid first before we get into the weeds of it. [C: Yeah.] Cas realizes that the staff is- it's sawed off. It's cut into pieces, and only a piece is given to Aaron, which is why, like, earlier, Sam goes like, "Wait. Isn't it supposed to turn the entire sea into blood? Why is it only turning [both] one guy into blood?" And this is why. It's because it's cut up into pieces. The dad screams at Aaron to get the fuck out of there, and Cas boops his head, and then, you know, he collapses. He goes to the kid, takes the fucking staff. Dean starts interrogating the kid. And he goes like, "We're not gonna hurt you. We just need to know where you got this." And the kid is just going, "Please don't kill my dad. It was me." And yeah. What they gather is that the kid got it from an angel. He said, "Those bastards, they killed my brother, and nothing bad even happened to them. So I prayed to God, and God didn't answer, but this angel did, and he said that I could have justice, but I have to take it myself." And then the angel gave him the staff of Moses. And Dean is like, "Well, what did you give in exchange?" And he says, "I bought it with my soul." And Cas is like, "Okay, well, nobody has ever sold a soul to an angel before, but I suppose it can happen." And they realize that the staff is cut into pieces so that the angel can buy even more souls.

C: We never learn what it means to sell your soul to an angel. It sounds fine to me! Guaranteed to get into Heaven?

G: Yeah, what is the logic behind it?

C: What is it?

G: Because later on, in Season 8, I believe, or maybe Season 9, we do get verification that what is running Heaven is the souls. Like, the souls are keeping the lights on. And so it's not like it's a fucking imposition to having to have souls. Like, they also need it. [C: Right.] And so buying a soul is like- It's probably fine. I don't know. What the fuck is going on? I think maybe they will clarify it later.

C: If it's the ten years thing like with the demon deal, then I guess it'd be bad that the kid has to die within ten years. [G: Ah, this is true.] Like, that would be the negative part of it. But yeah, it's not made clear.

G: If that was the case, they should have clarified that, I believe.

C: Yeah, they really really should have clarified.

G: Cas boops this kid asleep and then puts him over his shoulder.

C: And that kid never talks again. That is the end of Aaron being conscious and speaking and having a personality and story.

G: And Dean goes, "Well, what the fuck?" And then they go back to the motel room, and he lies the kid down on the bed. And then he goes like, "Yeah, I need to read the mark that the angel left in the soul." He says that it will be extremely painful for the kid. And Dean is the only one who protests. Like, Sam just stands in the corner like, "Mm, okay." And Dean is like, "No, no, no, wait, wait! Why? You can't do that!" And Sam just goes, "Is there any permanent damage?" And Cas goes, "Well, physically, minimal." Dean protests and protests. And Cas just goes, "There is no other way, and I will have to torture this kid, because I don't have the privilege not to!" [C sighs] No, he says, "I don't have the luxury not to" or something.

C: Yeah, "I can't wake him up and ask if that angel spoke with a stupid Scottish-French accent that sounds British!"

G: I specifically hate that like, in this scene, they like, linger on Cas's sad face [C laughs] when he goes, "I don't have the luxury." And then we go to Dean's face in like, shock but also a bit of understanding, and it's like fuck off! [C: Yeah.] Fuck off! Pissing me off.

C: Yeah. Supernatural has a thing where there's points where they're like, "I'm putting my foot down, something crosses a line regarding what my morals are," and there's other times when they're like, "It's difficult for me, emotionally, and only me, but it has to be done." And it's interesting where this one falls regarding that dichotomy.

G: I think Supernatural has always done this thing, and we have always pointed it out. But to them, it's not about the thing. It's not about doing the thing. It's about how you feel about doing the thing. [C: Yes.] So it's fine if you do a bad thing as long as you feel bad about it. [C: Yeah.] As long as you feel guilty, as long as it's the only choice, then it's completely fine that you do a horrible thing, as long as you have nightmares about it after. Fuck off! [C: Yeah. Yeah.] Pissing me off.

C: So Dean's good, because he went, "Nooo! Okay, though." about it.

G: "Noo!" And he's going to be sad about this for the rest of the day! [C laughs] And Sam, like, both of them allowed it to happen. Just to be completely clear, both Sam and Dean allowed it to happen. But because Dean protested and went, "Nooo! Oh, okay, you're sad? Oh, fine, but I'm still sad about it!" And Sam just went, "No, it's wrong. Oh, okay. Yeah. Go ahead," that makes Sam like, more egregious than Dean because- And I mean, Sam is more egregious than Dean because if both of them protested, maybe they would have had a chance. But like, [C: Yeah.] Dean also allowed it to happen, you know? [C: Yeah.] And the morality of Supernatural really shines through this episode. There's also the whole conversation about like, what does being a hunter mean.

C: Yeah, I mean, regarding like what it means to be a hunter, the reason that they're going after the staff, Cas is like, "Oh, so many more people are going to die." Why? I mean, it seems like, when they thought it was the dad, it seemed like he had three specific people he wanted to die, rightfully so. They're dead!

G: And this kid also had three specific people that they wanted to die. [C: Yeah.] And even the cop said like, "After us, it's probably done."

C: Yeah. So there's no further harm being prevented here. But it's just like, "Noo, they can't have this power, because maybe they'll be bad. Why? I don't know. Just give it to Heaven! We'll be good with the staff of Moses." So like, that doesn't make any sense. And then, what they do later for Aaron is that they force Balthazar to let go of his claim on his soul. And like, that's like, "Okay, this is within the realm of a hunter. This is a supernatural thing that's happening to the kid that's bad, so we're gonna make it stop." But like, they don't think about being sensitive when they're approaching the family for questioning. They don't think about doing anything other than torture to get the answer of which angel sold this to him. Like, they fucking leave him there for the cops because time is of the essence to get to Balthazar, but they don't think about like the emotional toll that, like, the cops getting him-

G: Having to wake up to the institution that killed your brother. Yeah.

C: Yeah, after remembering being tortured and in horrible pain, and then going home to your dad, who an angel knocked out just now.

G: And also, let's play out the situation, right? The cops come to him. They take him home. They go in. The dad has clippings of the dead police officers on the table. [C: Yes.] You think they're going to be benevolent to this guy who has been actively seeking out justice against them? Like, fuck off! I do think it really showcases the fundamental missteps in like, the philosophy of the show. Yeah. We have always said that Supernatural exists within a framework that is inherently racist. And like, I don't know. Supernatural has always played it out in a fantasy racism, always.

C: Yeah. And also, sometimes, real racism.

G: And then when they do the- This is something that we also said about Gordon, right? Like, they would try to attempt to do this thing where it's like, "No, but like, the monsters! The monsters!" You have an actual Black character on screen [C laughs] that you are mistreating to hell and back.

C: Yeah. And you also left him to the cops in Season 2, right?

G: Yeah. Yeah. And like, I don't even think the fucking race allegory that they're doing is good, like, number one. I don't think it's particularly good to go, "No, but the vampires are the equivalent of people of color!" [C laughs]

C: Yeah, you know how people of color, in order to live, they have to suck white people's blood?

G: Yeah, but like, that is what Supernatural is doing, like, in that episode, that was explicitly pretty much what they were doing, like, pretty explicitly. And so to want to do that, and then to turn around and go, "But we don't have to treat any of the actual Black characters that we have on the show with any dignity whatsoever. Don't worry about it," like, okay. Fuck off.

C: I guess another thing I was thinking about is that, you know, Aaron's a kid who's taking revenge on cops who murdered his brother in like, the show that's about brothers [G: Taking revenge, yeah.] who love each other who take revenge on other people because of their brothers and also like, make pretty much every character a mirror to one of the brothers because the way for you to feel compassion for a character in Supernatural is by going, [both] "They're just like Sam and Dean for real!" And obviously, I don't think that doing a direct one-to-one of like, being killed by demons and being killed by racist cops is like, a good move for Supernatural, but I think there's also a way for them to connect with Aaron and like, talk to him more in a way that it's like, "I fully understand what you did, and like, you also love your brother, I also love my brother," etc etc as a way of like, I don't know, just making him a character that the audience connects to more and all of that, and they just skip over it. Like, it seems like they don't even consider doing any kind of parallels, and that's-

G: The thing is is that is Supernatural's language. It sounds like, yeah, they probably shouldn't do this fucking parallel thing, but that is what they do. That is how the show communicates it, to its audience that like, this is a character that we're supposed to care about or this is a storyline we're supposed to connect to. That is how they do it. And so the fact that they don't do it at all, they don't extend that familiarity, or that- they don't extend that like, generosity in terms of thought towards this kid. Also, this kid is like, 14! [laughs] Like, it's a kid for real. They don't extend that to this kid and this family, I do think, as you said, like, speaks to what Supernatural thinks you the audience should feel about this. Like, "No, they're other." [C: Yeah.] Is Season 6 going to be like this? Is Sera Gamble- What's gonna happen? I mean, time is progressing.

C: Ugh. I don't know. Right. Last episode Bobby John, not good.

G: Yeah. Like, time is progressing in Supernatural, the show, and also the writer's room. It's progressing. And so at some point it should be- It should get better. Like, at least? [C laughs] You know?

C: I don't know. Progress isn't linear.

G: But they find new ways. Supernatural: We Will Find a Way. [both laugh] That's their tagline.

C: Yeah, Supernatural is progressing in the ways that it will put racism in its show.

G: Yeah. They do end up torturing this kid. And the way they do it is like, while the kid is screaming, it goes to Dean, making a sad face. And yeah, Cas is done. We never pan to this kid ever again. I don't think we ever see him on camera ever again, except accidentally when Cas is having that fight scene.

C: Some peripheral shots lying on the bed at points.

G: Cas is like, "Oh, yeah, I had a good friend, and it's this good friend who is doing all this. I thought he died." Dean is asking questions. Cas just goes, "Balthazar. I wonder." And then an angel like, appears in the room and goes, "Oh, yeah, Balthazar. You finally said it. Thanks, Cas. Now I have a name." And then the angel starts attacking Cas, and they start having a fight scene, and the angel goes, "Oh, by the way, Raphael says, hello." It's a fight scene. The setting of this room is like, it's in a high-rise building, and they must be in the seventh floor or something. Cas throws him and the angel out of the window. They both end up landing on Sam's car, the other angel on Sam's hood and Cas like, right in the middle, and it is pretty cool because like, Sam and Dean look down, and Cas is like, embedded into he car, and he like, gets himself out of there, and as he does, the metal squishes further. Very fun. And the angel disappears, and then, you know, there's the loud, blaring alarm of Sam's car. It's completely fucking totaled.

C: Sam goes, "My car!" [laughs]

G: And Dean just smirks and goes, "Okay, silver lining." Also, not to be, you know, a Destiel shipper, but I do find it completely amusing when Cas throws himself down, and then Sam and Dean both peek the first time- like, Sam, of course, has a distressed face because of his car, and Dean is doing like a little gasp, like a [gasps], which is very fun. An impressed little face.

C: Yeah. RIP to Sam's car.

G: Yeah. RIP to this Dodge Charger from 2006.

C: Yeah. Does he ever get a new car?

G: Well in Season 7, they change cars always. They have to hide the Impala.

C: Oh, but like, he and Dean aren't like, living and working together anymore. He needs a car to go on his solo hunts. I'd assume he'd get a new one.

G: Maybe he will. Yeah.

C: Okay, I hope he does. You know I'm a big proponent of the Sam Driving League.

-

C: Cas teleports back into the room and tells them that the angel he fought was a soldier of Raphael. Cas starts setting up the ritual to find Balthazar, but Dean's like, "No no no. Answer questions like, right now. Cas, what is up?" And he explains that there's a civil war going on in Heaven where Raphael and his followers want to rule Heaven, but "many other people" don't. And he doesn't say who that other camp wants to take over, but I guess it's him. [laughs] Everyone hates him and wants him to die, though.

G: Yeah, exactly.

C: Yeah, he goes, "I and many others, the last thing we want is to let him take over," and [laughs] many others is like one or two other people.

G: One guy. [C laughs] "Many others" is him and then half of Balthazar’s heart. Like, Balthazar don't even give a fuck! [both laugh]

C: Yeah, yeah, it's just Castiel, Cas, Cass with 2 S's.

G: It is hilarious, later on, he kills that angel, and then he goes, "Why won't any of you listen to me?" [both laughing] "Why won't any of you listen to meee? Now I have to kill you!"

C: Yeah, and I know he's having his emotional, mournful moment or whatever, but I don't care! [both laugh]

G: Yeah, that guy sucks! Go back to being eye candy, Cas. [C laughs]

C: He says that whoever has all these powerful, Heavenly weapons is going to win the war, so that's why he finds the staff of Moses so important. And what Raphael wants to continue and end the- or to continue the Apocalypse to its end because he's a "traditionalist." And Dean goes like, "Cas. Why didn't you tell us?" And Cas says that he was ashamed and expected more from his brothers. Why would he? They were all for the apocalypse!

G: Well, first of all, I just find it hilarious that it's like, "Why didn't you tell me?" "I was ashamed because my brother sucks so bad." If you truly were ashamed, you would have kept that to yourself, Cas. [C laughs] I'm gatekeeping shame.

C: Not even a top 15 Mitski song, I would say. It's not bad, but.

G: To be clear, my complaint is that they deliver it with no subtlety, and I wish it was something that was went through more- Like, they don't just say it in here, we see it in actuality, that's how we figure it out kind of deal. Yeah.

C: Yeah, I did write down, "I think Misha Collins is a bad actor" [laughs] when this line came up.

G: Yeah. I thought he was a bad actor in, "You think I came because you called?" But also, to be fair, that's just a bad line to give to Cas, I feel. [C: Yeah.] Cas would say, "I did not come here because you called me, Dean." Like, that's a Cas line. [C: Yeah.] "You think I came here because you called?" Fuck off. [C laughs] Who the fuck is writing this? Ben Edlund! ... I will not threaten you in any way, shape, or form. [C laughs]

C: Ben Edlund, I hope you live a long life, and that when you die, it's not in my country. [both laugh] [G: Yeah.] But yeah, I think the fact that there's no pause before he says, "I was ashamed." I think that was the acting choice that I thought was quite bad. But it's also not a very well-written line.

G: It's like they forgot how to write Cas or something. I think because they were leaning- I think with the Cas scenes this episode, they were really leaning a lot into the comedy of him, just the absurdity of his character, that I don't think they really did well with the like, more emotional parts or whatever. [C: Yeah.] Not some of the comedy also, but like, there are scenes that are funny with him. Like, I found him amusing in like, "Sam, Dean, I spent the last year-" like, that was funny. The "I wasn't gonna mention it" was funny. When he said, "That is still the saying," [C laughs] like, that is pretty funny. But like, there's just, you know, some lines here and there and the more emotional lines that are like, yeah, I think they're still feeling this character out.

C: Raphael wants the apocalypse because he's quote-unquote "a traditionalist"? The last time Raphael talked about why or just his general thoughts about God and the Apocalypse was 5.03, right? [G: Yeah.] I didn't review that scene before this episode. I should do it now. Do you recall what his deal was?

G: Well, his deal was predominantly "God is not here."

C: So yeah, right, it was "God's not here." "So you think you can do whatever you want?" He's upset that God ran off and disappeared, left no instructions and a world to run. "We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want Paradise." I don't know. Is that super traditionalist? Like, part of traditionalist stuff is thinking that it's God's will and all of that, right? For the Apocalypse to happen? But like, in 5.03, it seems very clearly like-

G: "We're tired."

C: "I'm upset at being abandoned, and if we just go through with this apocalypse thing, and if Michael wins in some way, then we'll like end up in the good universe where there's paradise on Earth because of all the suffering that I saw on Earth in the last century."

G: I suppose it is his enemy, Castiel, who's characterizing him right now.

C: [laughs] Yes.

G: It is a possibility that his philosophy is different. I'm not holding out my breath for it, because it's Supernatural, but I do think- I don't think Raphael really is the person to have made into a villain of Season 6, which seems to be what they're doing.

C: I guess Michael's in the cage. They already established Gabriel as a little scamp, and Lucifer's Lucifer. But yeah, I don't- I feel like Gabriel had villain potential.

G: Yeah, but you see, Gabriel is lovable, and Raphael is stern, and so we know how it goes.

C: I don't know. Isn't there also this super monster thing going on anyway? That could have just been the conflict.

G: Um, yeah, we'll figure that out as we go. [C: Okay.] I think you would be surprised by how related they are. [both laugh]

C: Thank you for your subtlety, Grey.

G: Again, I don't really remember the intricacies of the plot of Season 6. But like, those are a thing that are together. Forevah, even. Or something.

C: Got it. I mean, yeah, I think Cas is just being flattening in his characterization. But, as you said, [G: Yeah, but also Supernatural.] I don't really think that Raphael will have a chance to really explain himself at any point during the season. [G: Yeah.]

G: And like, I don't know. It does make me sad that they're like really intent on making Raphael like, evil or whatever. [C: Mm.] I don't know. I feel like there is value to- Because like, if you look at the four archangels, you know, you have Lucifer who hates God, and his response is to like, hate God. You have Michael, who still believes in his dad, and then you have Gabriel, who hates his dad and the response- or he doesn't seem to hate his dad. [C: Yeah, he's swad.] He seems to be mad at his brothers. His anger is externalized towards his brothers or something. You have Raphael, who's like, mad at God. His response is to feel defeated. And like, you know, we have talked about how having all these four archangels who are like the brothers of the show- not, you know what I mean. [C laughs] They are portrayed as brothers with brother dynamics, with a dad who is absent and harsh. I don't think it's productive to have yet another brother be the villain. [C: Yeah.] And like, I don't know. I think it does speak to something about Supernatural that they were like, "And Gabriel is going to be the one who we love. We wuv him. Wuv him!" Like, fuck off.

C: Yeah. And he has multiple episodes where all he does is antagonize and torture Sam and Dean, but he still gets his little redemption moment.

G: Yeah. And Raphael gets nothing?

C: So what's that about? And stern characters, Cas started as a stern character, and [G: Yeah.] you know, they kept running with him, and now everybody wuvs him, etc etc. So it's not just that they were like, "Raphael's no fun." They've shown that they can make a stern character fun. Cas is mostly there for comic relief, in fact. But like-

G: And I do think there was a time when the general fandom consensus and also you and I, I feel, we brought this to the podcast as well is the idea that the fans don't react to certain characters well, so the show doesn't develop them. I think more and more, I'm like, "That's just bullshit, man." If the show wants to do it, they can. [C: Yeah.] If they wanted to commit to Cas not being here anymore, they could have done that. [C: Yeah.] Like yeah, people are gonna complain and gonna stop watching and gonna send feathers to your office where you have workers that are allergic, but like, [both laugh] you know, you could have committed to it. And like, that's an extreme case. The Cas thing is an extreme case because it's like, you killed a character that they want to be in the show. But, for example, in situations where it's like, you have a character in the show, and the audience is not reacting to that character well, it's not like it's automatically like, "Ugh, damn it! Now we have to kill them." [C: Yeah.] That's not like your only option. You can do other thing!

C: Yeah, have you considered writing good? [G laughs]

G: Have you considered considering your writing options? [C laughs] Yeah, like, there is a point where it's like, yeah, I think the show just doesn't give a fuck to do it.

C: They came in with Gordon knowing that he was going to be a villain, so they didn't bother. [G: Yeah.] They did the same thing with Uriel, and now the same thing with Raphael.

G: And they can go like, "Oh, but you see, we tried," and it's like, well, maybe if you tried harder, [laughs] you could have done something with it!

C: So Cas takes some of Dean's blood for the ritual because Dean is his favowite. The police are showing up because of like, the whole car alarm, two people crashing on top of a car situation. Cas has tracked down Balthazar's location and says, "Let's go." And Dean goes, "Wait, wait, wait! What about Aaron?" And Cas goes, “Don't you think the police will take him home?” And it just cuts.

G: You can just teleport him like that! Like, you can just literally go [C: Yeah, it's very fast.]- you can just snap, and you're back there.

C: Yeah, and I don't- I was thinking about the purpose of this line. And I think it's for Supernatural to reiterate that not all cops are bad. Because, like, it cuts after that. There's no Dean face reaction shot. It cuts like what Cas says is obvious. Of course they'll take him home, it'll be fine.

G: I thought the intention was to show that Cas is heartless now and doesn't give a fuck.

C: I think that that is possible, but I feel like the way that they've done that is like, Dean face reaction shots.

G: Have Dean react, yeah.

C: And there was no Dean face reaction shot. This was just like, Cas saying a statement and then it cutting, so to me, it read as like a "Well duh, they will." And just as like a "So don't worry! Not all cops are bad. These ones will take him home, and he'll be real happy about it." But it could also be what you said.

G: I think it could also be the whole, like, what is the role of a hunter? "Oh, this is out of our bounds. We don't have to take this kid home. It's not our responsibility."

C: Yeah, "We kidnapped him, but we don't have to take him home."

-

G: Yeah. Now they're in a fucking- in the lawn of a mansion. Sam and Dean basically stay outside, and it's just Cas who comes in, and there's this scene where there's like- you know those fancy stairs in fancy houses? And there's a giant fucking frog sitting on the railing, right in the middle. And Cas looks at it, and the frog looks at him and croaks, and there's like, close-ups of both of them. And then, like, you know, he goes up. He follows where the music is. What is with the gag with the frogs? Balthazar says it later. I still don't understand it. Am I missing something?

C: I don't know. It's a plague, and he was turning some angels into frogs?

G: So that frog was an angel.

C: Or they were jumping out of the throat of the dead body of the angel that attacked Cas earlier.

G: Balthazar is there, and he has a ambiguous accent. I'm pretty sure it's British. I think we can just say it's a British accent.

C: But is it?

G: Listeners, if you think this accent is a British accent, send us an ask saying that Cas should go into heat. Thank you! Nobody, absolutely nobody has done it still.

C: Yeah, I think we're supposed to take that as a message. [G laughs]

G: Anyway, the angel that Cas duked it out with earlier is now dead on the floor, and there's like, a frog coming out of his mouth. And Castiel is like, "Balthazar, this is serious shit. I thought you were dead. I grieved you." And Balthazar’s like, "Yeah, no. I needed to die so that I can live!" Cas asked, like, "You stole the staff of Moses?" And Balthazar says he stole a lot of things and that he needed to do it because nothing's ever going to change in Heaven, and so like, just get a weapon, get out of there, and run and like, live your life! And Balthazar is like, "Whatever you need, Cas. Just ask. I'll give it to you." And Cas goes like, "I need the weapons." And Balthazar's like, "Oh, noo!" And Balthazar actually says that "The reason why I've done all this is because you tore up the script. I'm just following your footsteps. It's a new era of no rules, no destiny, just utter and complete freedom." And Cas is upset that this is what he did with that freedom. And Cas finally mentions that like, it's a civil war up there. "If we can beat Raphael, we can end this. Just give me the weapons!" And Balthazar says, "You know what's so funny about you. You actually believe you can stop the fighting. Just leave, Cas. Just fake your own death and go." Cas says, "Well, Raphael now knows that you're alive, so tough luck!" And Balthazar's like, "Well, whatever. I'm just going to leave, and I really am happy to see you, even if you still have that stick up your ass." He leaves- Well, first, there's like, big thunder, and he's like, "Oh, yeah, Raphael's coming. Well, tell him to bite me!" and then he leaves, and it's just Cas now. Raphael and I think two other angels come in. Sam and Dean are like, downstairs, and then an angel shows up, and Sam goes like, "Hey, I'm here, and I have an angel blade." And then another angel shows up beside Sam, and it's like, "Well, you think you can knife fight an angel?" And we go to Dean, who's like, "Who said anything about knife fights?" and then he does the sigil, and it expels the angels out of there. You know what? I do love when they do this shit. I love when they like bluff things out, and it's like, "Oh, no, Sam's in danger! But only because they planned it! And Dean has an even bigger gun!" [C laughs] Like, love it.

C: It's pretty fun.

G: And Cas is inside, and there's another angel that's coming on to him, and the angel's like walking and walking towards him. [laughs] And Cas is going, "Nooo! Don't do this, pwease!" [C laughs] And then he's like just saying, "No, I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you." And literally, the angel is like five feet away from him, [both laugh] and he throws a fucking angel blade into his chest. And the angel dies, collapses on the ground, [C: Do we even see the wings?] and Cas just goes, "Why won't any of you listen?" What?

C: Did we even get wings on this guy?

G: No, I don't think so. I think they DGAF. [C: Boo!] I don't think we see the body fall to the ground with the angel wings. And then Raphael shows up. They're like fighting, I suppose. And Raphael is about to fucking kill this guy when suddenly, Balthazar shows up, and he has a like, a giant rock of salt, I would assume. And it starts glowing. Raphael turns into a pillar of salt. It is so fucking corny that Balthazar has to go, "Oh, yeah, same thing happened to Lot's wife." [C: Yeah.] Like, fuck off! We all read Slaughterhouse-Five!

C: I know already. We all fucking know about Lot's wife. We've read the poetry and the Bible.

G: Cas goes, "You came back!" Balthazar's like, "Yeah, no. Raphael's gonna need to find a new body, so like, it's fine." And Dean shows up and drops a lighter onto a ring of holy oil. [C: Somehow.] How did they ever plan this shit? How do they ever plan this shit?

C: I don't know. Well, you know, we were only getting like, I think, shots of like, Balthazar and Cas's faces during that conversation. [both laugh] Maybe Dean was crawling around on the floor in a circle around him with holy oil, we just didn't see it in the shot!

G: Yeah, he was actually Naruto running around Balthazar this whole time. It just wasn't relevant to our journey. [C: Exactly.] Balthazar calls Dean a hairless ape. He seems to have some hair.

C: Yeah. And is it blond or brown?

G: Let's not get into it. [both laugh] And Dean is like, "Okay, what you're going to do is you're going to remove the marker off Aaron Birch's soul." And Balthazar is like, "Wow! You're going to let this fucking hairless ape talk to me like this, Castiel?" And Cas goes, "Yes." And Balthazar's like, "Okay, fine." And then he clears the boy's debt. "His soul is his own." We, of course, never see this, never see a follow-up, never see anything. [C: Yeah.] They don't even seem to give a fuck about the like- Again, the soul thing is probably fine. They did just torture this kid, though. Are we not gonna acknowledge that? Did he also remove the torture? Like- [laughs] What's happening?

C: Yeah, we know that Cas can remove memories. I feel like it would be a kindness to remove the memory of the torture, but he doesn't have the luxury!

G: Dean asks, "Why are you buying souls, anyway?" And Balthazar goes, "Well, in this economy, it's probably the only thing worth buying."

C: Okay, sure, Balthazar. I know that Cas has-

G: Is he a crypto bro? [both laugh] Maybe he is a crypto bro. [C: Maybe.] Maybe if we stink of souls as some sort of cryptocurrency, then everything makes sense.

C: Well, Cas swallows all the souls in Purgatory in order to have enough power to defeat Raphael, so is this a similar situation? But okay, why does Balthazar need all that shit if all he wants to do is have twelvesomes and hang out, as he said he was doing on Earth?

G: Have what? Souls? You'll figure that out next time.

C: Okay, cool. [laughs]

G: Balthazar is like, "Okay, well, now, you gotta release me." And Dean's like, "No, we don't!" but Cas does.

C: Wait wait wait, okay. So if an angel has the power to reduce the flames of holy fire [G: But only if they're outside.], why don't the angels in the circle do it and then leave?

G: Because they're like, powered down on the inside.

C: Okay. Is that real?

G: No. [C laughs] But I assume it is. [C: Okay.] How else are you gonna explain this?

C: That they just didn't think about it too hard?

G: Cas tells Balthazar like, "My debt to you is cleared." So they're equal now, because, you know, Balthazar turned Raphael to a pillar of salt and Cas let him go! And Dean, as Balthazar leaves, Dean shouts at Cas, "Are you out of your mind?!" But as he turns around, Cas is also gone. [C: Yay!] And he's like, "Oh, fucking angels!" Well, he says, "Frigging angels. Come on!"

C: "Come on!"

-

C: You know, we're post-case, and Sam and Dean are trying to cram all the stuff in Sam's car trunk into the Impala now.

G: There's a scene where they pick up like- Sam finds a Halloween costume! [C: Yeah.] - just like me with Dean Winchester - in the like far end of the trunk, and he takes it out, and it's a mask of the monster from Season 1, Episode 2. [C: Yeah.] But they don't say it like that. [laughs] They don't say, "Oh, this is the monster from Season 1, Episode 2!" They just say it straight up. And like, yeah, Dean is like, "Oh, yeah, that's for Ben's Halloween costume." with the implication that he made it because it's an accurate representation, apparently. [C: Right.] Which is pretty fun.

C: So they have a convo where Dean's asking Sam like, "Are you okay? You've been kind of sus. Why weren't you against Cas torturing a child?"

G: "Are you a child torturer, Sam?" [C laughs] And Sam basically goes, "Well, you are. But like, I don't have to be. But I am, so who give a fuck?"

C: Dean says, "It just seems like you didn't care," and Sam goes, "You're wrong!" Dean says that something's up with him, and "I feel like something happened to you in Hell. I understand that it really fucks somebody up." He says, "Believe me, I know what that does to a guy," and Sam says, "To you."

G: "To you." To one guy.

C: So funny! So fucking funny!

G: No, this is hilarious.

C: And Dean's like, "What?" And Sam goes, "You know what it does to you. It tortured you, you know. I think it still does. But I'm okay." [both laugh] He's soo funny. [G: He's so funny!] He said, "RIP to you, but I'm different."

G: Literally, and he is.

C: He is! Dean's like, "What, you’re saying you’re stronger than me?" And Sam says, "No, I'm just saying, RIP to you, but we're different."

G: Yeah. "I'm built different, Dean."

C: And they drive off.

G: That's it. What did we think about this episode? [C: Ugh.] I think they're building up to like- In terms of what it contributes to the show, they are building up to something. [C: Yeah.] I wish they didn't use antiblack police brutality as a way to build up that Sam and Cas are slowly turning evil or whatever the fuck.

C: [laughs] Yeah. I agree with that statement.

G: Also, just like that IMDb user once said, what is up with Supernatural and torture? What  the fuck is their deal with torture?

C: Maybe if Sam and Dean learned some people skills. Crowley is supposed to be the negotiator, and like, he doesn't even-

G: His negotiation is just torture. [laughs]

C: Yeah, just torture and then killing some other people and being like, "You'll die if you don't tell me!" [both laugh] Like, what is this? It's like these writers don't even believe in the power of the word!

G: Yeah! Best Line/Worst Line?

C: Uh... "To you." [laughs] is my best line.

G: Is your best line? No, yeah, that's pretty fun.

C: Yeah. The people skills rusty multi-dimensional intent is good, too.

G: I think on the sequence of funny Cas lines, I do find the "That is still the saying, yes?" [C laughs] quite hilarious. And I mean, offshoot of it, "Why would any of you listen to me?" [both laugh] is also really fucking funny if I'm being for real.

C: I don't think it was intended to be.

G: I mean, I know, but it is.

C: And is it the best line?

G: I would say it's pretty hilarious.

C: Yeah, worst line, "Don't you think the police will take him home?"

G: I think Cas saying, "I don't have the privilege." and the way they frame that as like, a reveal to Dean or whatever [C: Yeah.] that allows him to accept the fate of this kid who is not his to accept.

C: Don't like it!

G: Okay. What's our next one? Spread those sheets?

C: Yeah. There is racism.

G: I do think it's a 4 or 5. I think it's fundamental to the episode, [C: Yeah, I agree.] and I think it's really bad.

C: Yeah. Well, which which of the two are we going for?

G: What do you think about it?

C: I don't know.

G: Have we ever done a 5?

C: We did a 5 for "Hammer of the Gods," but I don't think everything needs to be "Hammer of the Gods" to be a 5.

G: So let's go 5.

C: Yeah, I think 5 is reasonable. Misogyny, I think a bit with the sex worker at the beginning.

G: 1?

C: Yeah, 1 makes sense. I don't remember any homophobia. We did say there was queerbaiting but like-

G: I don't think that's a point, yeah. [C: Yeah.] What's our next one. Ratings.

C: IMDb. If I had to guess, I'd say this is the highest of- Oh, wait! Who's- I'm odd. Yeah, okay. I'd say this is the highest of Season 6 so far in terms of what I think people would enjoy.

G: We have two 7.8s.

C: We have a 7.6 and a 7.8. So yeah, I don't know.

G: The trajectory says that this would be higher.

C: Yeah, but I don't know how much higher because I don't know what the new standards of Season 6 are. So I'm just gonna say an 8.0?

G: Oh, me too!

C: Sad!

G: 8.0. Okay, let's see.

C: Are we diversifying our portfolio? No, you're just going to go with it?

G: Okay, I'm gonna go 8.1, then. [C: Okay.] Okay, let's see. Ha! It's an 8.1!

C: Oh! Congratulations!

G: Thank you.

C: What are people saying?

G: "I really enjoyed this episode. Castiel is back." "The way he and the brothers communicate is just great. I really enjoyed their reunion," blah blah blah.

C: [laughs] "This is not our Sam. Sam would never hire a prostitute."

G: Noo, is this something they really said?

C: [laughs] Yeah.

G: This one says, "Something is still off with Sam...and his new shiny car just had to go :), so at least that part will be right now :)" "Balthazar is pretty darn hot and interesting"? [C laughs] Has anyone ever felt that way apart from this person? "Cas is back!"

C: I think it's because people like British accents, which may or may not be his accent. [both laugh]

G: "The gore level moved way up this episode."

C: Yeah, this person thinks that the gore level is up because Sera Gamble likes more gruesome scenes. I believe it. You've mentioned this as a bit of a Season 6 staple.

G: Yeah. Many people love Cas.

C: Yeah, okay, this episode mentions that it "apes Black Lives Matter for social color, and it all feels cheap and ill-planned."

G: Yeah, it does. Okay, this one. I'm gonna read this whole thing. This one is 2/10, "Awful second half." "So here's what's wrong with this episode, and what will eventually kill the series." [C laughs] Written in October 9, 2010, by the way, so they don't know anything. "We start off with a bang as three police officers die incredibly gory deaths. Turns out someone has put a hex on the three, and Sam and Dean are in town to check things out. So far, so good. The hex is caused by misuse of Moses' staff, which has been stolen by an angel, and Sam and Dean must retrieve the staff just as if they were in an episode of Warehouse 13 or Friday the 13th - The TV series." [both laugh] Evocative. "From there, it's all downhill, as we find out is heaven is still at war. The rest of the episode is dull stuff with Castiel (who was OK for a story arc but not as a recurring character) [C laughs] has words with some other angels, and fights breakout. Dull, dull, dull. The thing that killed GHOST WHISPERER"--[C: Your favorite!] A TV show I love, by the way.--"was an increasingly maudlin tone and the overuse of Hewitt's real-life beau in a recurring role as a college prof. The poor guy couldn't act his way out of a paper bag, [laughs] and this plus the maudlin stuff eventually did in GW. The overuse of heavenly wars, and Castiel himself will kill SUPERNATURAL. [both laugh] But then, the show has been on for six seasons. And as much as I'd like to see it go another six, the writers have hit bottom for plots. [C: So true.] We watched THE X-FILEs die a painful death in its last two or three seasons. Now we apparently have to witness the same for SUPERNATURAL. It is a real shame." [C laughs]

C: It is. A real shame.

G: It's literally fine!

C: This person has 700 reviews.

G: I don't know. I'm holding out hope that Season 6 may not be that bad, but given the trajectory of where we are right now as people and as a podcast, probably not. [laughs] And the TV show Supernatural.

G: That’s it for this episode of Busty Asian Beauties. [C laughs] Next week, we will be discussing Season 6, Episode 4: "Weekend at Bobby’s"! [C: Nice.] Nice. Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts.

C: Follow us on social media! We are on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com. Our official tag is #BABPod, B-A-B-POD. Thanks to everyone who's donated to our Ko-Fi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod, which is where our outtakes live, and check out our merch at babpod.redbubble.com.

G: You can email us your feedback, comments, or inquiries at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com. See you guys next time! [both] Bye!

[guitar music]

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 108: Hello, It's Allergies. Hello, It's Rhinitis. And this is Stuffy Asian Beauties.

Today, Crystal & Grey discuss Supernatural 6.04 - Weekend at Bobby's. We talk about: Bobby absolutely killing it at the grill, the process of tricking a priest into blessing your weapons, and Sam and Dean meeting their rivals, another hunter duo that is like a kid to Bobby.

Episode 108 Outtakes: Traipse through the Scottish Culinary Scene

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