#this first

[humanityinahandbag]

I desperately want to see Ed and Stede roleplaying

And it's not even because I want them to have sex (and I do). But let's be honest. These two would embrace their roles like they were auditioning for a community theater play.

Lucius or Frenchie or even Olu might mention off hand how much roleplaying spiced up their love lives before explaining to their very confused captains exactly what it is.

"You play a character," Lucius would explain. "Something sexy. To spice up the moment, yunno?"

And these two would hear play a character and run an entire fucking 5k with it.

It would take them a solid 2 hours to even get to the sexy stuff, because Ed was so invested in running a professional bed and breakfast and Stede would be so enamored by Ed (Jeff) explaining why he chose lavender soap for the rooms instead of jasmine and they'd recruit some of the crew members to pretend to be guests, which ends up being really fucking awkward because Lucius expected it to be like a freaky orgy thing, but these two just genuinely wanted them to rate the services provided by Jeff's Inn by the Sea and give their opinions on whether or not they should put out orange marmalade for breakfast or raspberry jam.

"I really don't think you're understanding roleplay," Lucius will try and say.

"Hey!" Stede would snap. "Ed's doing a lovely job. You're a top rate innkeeper, darling!"

"But I think the point is like... what would happen if you showed up without money or something like that. Yunno? Like... how would you pay for the room...?"

"If he can't pay, he can't stay, man," says Ed, like it's obvious.

"Uh huh. But... you wouldn't let him offer to pay it some other way...?"

"Bro!" Ed has the audacity to look horrified. "I can't just go ahead letting people stay in rooms for a handy! I'd never make any money that way! I've got a business to run here!"

"Yeah, Lucius," says Stede. "He's got a business to run!"

"Right then," says Lucius. "My mistake."

(they get to the sexy times eventually. mostly because Ed is so incredibly turned on when Stede shows him how to fold napkins into swans, and nothing is hotter than stellar customer service.)

[ntamed]

any mutuals want a starter ? 🥺

[hauntingrabbits]

comic

[asoftspotforangels]

some of my favorite woven tapestries, by Cecilia Blomberg:

Point Defiance Steps

Mates

Rising Tides

Vashon Steps

[goldensunset]

can you reblog a two-part post in the correct order?

[andisupreme]

At the company retreat, one extremely drunk girl asked what my pronouns were. (Eventually, it took her a while to word the question.) After the whole conversation was done, she goes- "YEAHHH GURL, Get on with--with THY bad self! See what I did?? They/them/thy."

I was almost holding back tears from trying not to laugh as I told her yes that's great you nailed it honey. Thank you very much I am feeling the love.

Anyway I've been assigned Thee/Thine at Supportive Drunk Girl

[skipppppy]

I was cooking on twitter today

[mudwisard]

my trick for getting through grad school is learning to navigate the quadrants with all their nuances

[puppyeared]

filipina miku!! my mom helped me with her outfit ^_^

[koobiie]

shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

[scumbagsblog]

where's that masterpost of quotes that have no right going as hard as they do. I'd like to submit "Protagonism is best left to teens and the insane"

[ladyshinga]

[inkskinned]

please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!

do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!

[dredsina]

Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than "Sorry I'm not interested." No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I'm not interested. Don't answer their questions. Don't give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I'm not interested.

[muffinlevelchicanery]