#thinking about them again i fear
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look we as a society moved on from this too fast... fr could you imagine next year if a driver is getting bad treatment and their ex-teammate walks into the garage with them to defend them... like lewis comes back into mercedes with george in ferrari overalls to show support for him, or charles and carlos... everyone would lose their MINDS and yet nigel mansell was doing this casually in 1985 for elio de angelis... much to think about...
#thinking about them again i fear#f1#classic f1#formula 1#f1 1980s#elio de angelis#nigel mansell#nigelio
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legend has it that the young witch circe and the once beautiful nymph scylla shared a complicated past...
#art#cirscylla#that's the ship name i like for them best anyway#circe#scylla#greek mythology#welcome to my greek mythos yuri#DOOMED YURI#circylla#epic the musical#do i even tag it as that? i think i should cuz epic is the reason im so into greek mythos#jorge said we might get a spinoff about their backstory and im insane over that#i know it's probably going to be about how circe loved that one guy but still a girl can dream#this is them but younger! before circe turns scylla into the horrific man-eating monster that even poseiden fears#there's just so much potential here#consider a younger and much warier circe landing on the island for the first time after being outcasted by her family for her magic#and she meets scylla there who back then is a much happier and playful person#enemies to lovers to enemies again#i don't know if they ever make it to lovers or if they were only an almost#they're about to have the worst breakup in greek history#im rambling in tags MY BAD
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"Bill... Can I call you that?" / "You can call me whatever you want except 'My Love'!"
"Ha ha! That's a joke! Everybody loves me!"
Y yo a ti Ford, or whatever. @fearoftriangles pointed out that in the Spanish version of The Book of Bill: Bill says Ford can call him anything but "Mi Amor" instead of anything but "Late for Dinner" and-
...I swear, Spanish translators cannot keep getting away with this
#Its been 4 years and i still regularly think about 'Y yo a ti Cas' you can't do this to me AGAIN#joke is that this is the format of the Destiel y yo a ti cas / dont do this cas meme but i fear by making them look happy i lost the vibe#I will redraw them with the og crying meme someday tho i think it'd be funny#Gravity falls#Billford#Stanford Pines#Bill Cipher#Ford Pines#young stanford pines#bill/ford#Bill x ford#Destiel meme#Fan art#Fanart#GF fanart#Artists on tumblr#My art#The book of bill#Tbob#Love them they are the worst and apparently even more worse in spanish <333#I hope i got the words right i do not speak spanish and i know google translate is the source of all evil 😅
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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Really fucked up that, when they’re young, Patrick and Art are SO tactile with each other, so comfortable sharing the same space. Art lets Patrick touch him and move him and physically overwhelm him and easily acquiesces to it, if not outright enjoys it.
Then in the present, they’ve been so far out of each other’s orbit for so long, held such animosity that when they have their moment alone in the sauna, Art physically recoils from Patrick’s close proximity! It’s so painful to watch because even as Patrick’s goading him, it’s so obvious he wants to be able to get back into Art’s space. But Art has erected all these walls around himself, he refuses to give Patrick an inch or even admit to missing how close they used to be!
AND THEN we see Art and Tashi later and he wants her to hold him, to be gentle with him, and just TOUCH him. Like, he does miss that kind of close physical contact! He either doesn’t know how to ask for it or is uncomfortable being that openly vulnerable. Worth noting that he pretty much always defers to Tashi in regard to initiating physical intimacy (with their first kiss, though he does state his desire, SHE has to be the one to make the first move). And it seems pretty obvious that Tashi herself isn’t comfortable providing that intimacy, whereas Patrick actively seeks to provide it (the hug/forehead kiss after their win together in the early years, dragging the stool closer to him).
Art has tried very hard to act like he doesn’t need physical affection and even though his discipline and devotion to Tashi has made him a stronger tennis player, it’s made him a hollow person, which, in turn, has kept him from becoming a GREAT tennis player.
All of this, of course, is why the ending hits so damn hard.
#challengers#challengers spoilers#art donaldson#unfortunately i have once again zeroed in on the most repressed character and made them my favorite#lol @ all the people saying he’s a manipulative snake: that’s part of what makes him great!#i think a fair amount of that manipulation or attempts at it come from a fear of loss and being alone#if he has to lose one to keep the other he’ll do it because it’s better than being left behind#hoo boy yet another character trait my fucked up faves have in common 😬#let’s not even get into how tashi AND patrick are trying to do right by him#tashi by making it so he can retire with a career to be proud of#patrick (who was pissed on art’s behalf wrt throwing the match) by laying all his cards on the table (court)#and giving art what he needed to play a great fucking game#there’s a whole other post to be written about how tashi and patrick handle art in similar ways#specifically that he submits to them so easily they take charge of him manipulate him the ways they want#good lord i need to see this movie again#or not might not be conducive to keeping my brain from melting out my ears lol
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things didn’t work out with the Mothman
I don’t think the siren mentioned in Lost Legends that Ford had dated ever had a name, so I’ve decided to call her Penelope because silly Epic reference
I found those deleted storyboards from A Tale of Two Stans where it showed the siren and so I’ve decided to draw her my way based on those boards and do some sillies (5th drawing features my friend @pinkhibiscustea ‘s mermaid OC)
#doctorsiren#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanley pines#penelope the siren#not my oc#gravity falls fanart#monster hunter pines au#digital art#my art#procreate#I want to tag a ship name for them but I fear calling it sirenford would sound like I’m talking about myself HAHA#penford#??#maybe?#anyways yeah I’m calling her Penelope 🤪#I drew kid stan and ford wearing mismatching tennis shoes and I think they’d do it again in MHP AU#those boards showed that ‘the siren’ he dated was an actual mermaid and not just bill cipher haha#bc when dipper says the thing about the siren. he’s clearly reading the bill cipher page????#Mabel and Ford have so many parallels to each other tbh and like they both had a mermaid love interest
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I love Raph and haven’t said that enough so to be more specific I love that Raph is a soft boy who loves bear plushies, a gross boy who eats an assortment of things that are definitely better left alone, a smart boy who is more than capable of taking down villains through planning and fortitude alike, a strong boy who is dedicated to training his muscles and fighting prowess, a teenage boy who loves his brothers but is more than happy to tease and roughhouse with them, an angry boy who sometimes lets his anger take a hold of him to cover the fear, a gentle boy who is generous with hugs and affirmations to those he loves, a capable boy who takes on more than should ever be expected of a teenager, a good boy who just wants to be a hero and slowly comes to realize the cost of that duty, a good boy who has no reservations about putting himself in the way of harm coming to his family, a good boy who’s a great brother and son and person and deserves only the best the world has to offer.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt raph#rise raph#he’s so wonderful frfr#my poor boy is traumatized but still so proud of what they accomplished because they’re HEROES#what started as something fun - Saturday morning cartoon-like heroes vs villains esque - soon becomes his calling#and he loses himself a little along the way#because the world is TERRIFYING now#if they don’t do something about the bad things in the world then worse things will come#and Raph CARES too much to let it happen#even at the expense of his own happiness and youth#and he luckily reigns back that fear - knowing his family is there to keep an eye out with him#and he finally lets himself be a kid again#he’s very well rounded and his flaws are so good because (like the others) they are ALSO his strengths#I like how it’s softly implied that bears are his fav animal too bc that’s cute af#headcanon that he likes them so much because a stuffed bear was the first toy splinter managed to get Raph#but yeah one of my favorite things about tmnt is that the characters are well rounded and rottmnt exemplifies that immensely#with raph being no exception!!#amazing big brother and character#there’s a REASON in my tmnt main character tierlist he’s S tier!!!!#hot take but in terms of who should be leader I think it should be less who’s the better leader-#-and more who’s the better leader FOR THIS SPECIFIC MISSION#bc all four can be great leaders fight me on that#APRIL can as well 100%#doesn’t need a designated leader for them to succeed#they just need ~communication~#one of my favorite things tying Raph and Leo together is that they both *hide*#I’ve talked about Leo’s many masks a lot but Raph has one too#and it’s the mask of a hero - the mask of the protector
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#mrs flood who are you: time lord edition
#dwedit#doctor who#mrs flood#fifteenth doctor#the master#jacobi!master#tenth doctor#jack harkness#martha jones#twelfth doctor#ninth doctor#*#okay here is my argument: mrs flood IS a time lord but her presence here has nothing to do with the doctor#instead she's here because of ruby. she's seemingly part of/related to the pantheon of discord & we know that ruby is connected to them too#so i think that she was deliberately placed as ruby's neighbor by the pantheon/oldest one/ruby's mom/? in order to watch over her#it also explains why she was there to check on ruby in 1.04. once she realizes she's on the phone w carla she says 'nothing to do with me'#and she leaves. which implies that it COULD have had something to do with her. if it had been something else going on#ANYWAY. to get to the time lordness of it all. rn i personally believe that she's a time lord that's been hiding on earth for 50+ years#bc i don't think she recognized the police box as a tardis initially. that first quote should be taken at face value.#instead picture this: she's watching over ruby as per usual. a police box is there - weird but nbd. then it dematerializes in front of her.#she drops her groceries. she's shocked. she kinda looks scared. if she already knew it was a tardis why would she react like that?#so imo she knows OF tardises. she DIDN'T know the police box was one. and she's worried the time lords have found her hence the fear.#but when nothing happens and nobody comes at her she realizes she's still safe#later when she sees the doctor she realizes the tardis is his/he must be a time lord. he doesn't identify her but that's happened before#so then when she asks him who he is i think what she's actually asking for is his title. WHICH time lord are you.#bc lbr if she knows abt tardises then she knows about time lords and if she knows abt time lords she knows what it means for ruby#to be joining him - and that's why she wishes ruby good luck. meanwhile this is clearly the outcome she WANTS (them to be together)#bc she gets visibly upset when the doctor seems to decide to leave without ruby.#and for once i'm not master clowning bc the list of names the doctor gives out is VERY interesting. some of them we've never heard before:#the bishop; the conquistador; later he adds the pedant and sagi-shi and reiterates the bishop AGAIN. so i wonder if she's the bishop.....
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Hmmm just gonna spit this headcanon out in text post form since A. I don't think I could exposit it well enough in image form and B. It's not actually textually/thematically substantiated and I don't like actually staking my stuff on just vibes alone*
But anyway. I'd say it's pretty evident that all the islanders forgot their names, right? King obviously. Because why the hell else would he do that, but also Siffrin No Middle Names No Last Name.
They're 'pretty sure' they've 'always' been 'Just Siffrin' 'as long as they can remember'. It's a pretty cruel twist of the knife to say that they don't even get to keep their birth name as a memento, which is why I'm saying as such.
My utterly unsubstantiated claim is I think it'd be cute to say that Sisyphus *is* the name Siffrin initially picked, assuming the myth of King Sisyphus is recontextualised as idk, just a play or something in the setting. But I like the idea of Siffrin going 'oh shit 🫵 he's just like me fr' at a tortured fictional character long before the irony kicks in.
As for how Sisyphus -> Siffrin. I think that chronic mumbler and emotional doormat Sif just did not correct people who misheard the name during their time travelling, and went through enough places with incompatible phonologies (pronounceable sounds in the language) without ever really writing it down that it just got kinda. Changed until it was unrecognisable, and Siffrin just went with it until the earlier pronunciations slipped out of their swiss-cheese brain. And they just kinda don't remember any of that.
Also, something something the horrid realisation that Siffrin also named themselves after a King. Just not as blatantly.
*(though I think there's something here about Siffrin, a guy from a belief system that seems to thoroughly disincentivise autonomy and self-motivated choice continuously having their hand forced to make changes/choices they don't want but have no choice but to... It's not solid enough to really back this up tbh, but it informs it.)
Anyway.
#theres also something one of my french-speaker friends said about siffrin's official pronounciation being the feminine way to pronounce -in?#which i dont know enough about to really corroborate and theyre busyyyy and havent started the game yet so i cant really ask#im sure someone else has already voiced this easy-to-come-up-with headcanon anyway but just in case nobody has i decided to post it#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time#isat siffrin#isat loop#i also personally picture sif (and loop especially) being more hostile to the concept of changing themselves after The Encounter#both of them being big grudge-holders and that 'want' to control your own destiny being clearly against how they interpret the universe#as for whether they should be so hostile? probably not! but they appear to be anxious in fear of some kind of divine retribution should#they like. ever even dare to Want. and uh. well. that certainly went well for Loop. not sure they'd be gung-ho to do it again#so Loop being able to go 'oh well it wasn't my REAL name' as a salve for having to make a new identity AGAIN....#while sif is explicitly clinging to it as an anchor for Who They Are If Nothing Else.. they can upset each other and also mirabelle i think#lucabytetalks
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Huzzah! It's birthday time! I'm slowly accumulating more and more things I like (latest additions this vest I made and a travel typewriter! Still need to fix the latter one though)
Sure has been a year.
#terri#niart#got my wisdom toofies out#well 2 out of 4#still got stitches#idk if this removal lowkey fixed my fear of the dentist?#it was so easy and painless#also finally i'm on anxiety meds jkahsdjash#i also got depression meds but i haven't tested them yet#I'm going to see the love of my life soon again!!!#only 2 more months to go....#i've also finally found awesome friends who don't make me feel like i'm insane for wanting to be cared for#the difference is like night and day#old friends saying hey let's surprise another friend of ours oh also i think it's your birthday on that day#new friends reminding me to pick a brunch place for us to go on my special day#i am sobbing#the right people are out there#don't lose hope#i've never felt this platonically loved honestly#also yes i'm working on the next dragon's lair aksjdhasjkd#just#a lot of things happening and i'm sooo burnt out#this piece was such a strain and i just#don't have patience for art rn#this is photobashed btw there's an actual photo of my typewriter under all those layers#i'm not about to spend 300 hours just to draw a typewriter from this angle kajshdjkasdh#ALSO ONE MORE THING CAN I JUST GUSH ABOUT THE ANASTASIA BROADWAY OKAY?!?!?!#I didn't realise until now that they made it way more historically inspired and i mean bruh BRUH#i have been having a recording of it playing on the background nonstop for like 3 days now#Vladimir Popov I want to inject you straight into my veins holy shit he is a perfect man
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Thinking about vampires, death, life, and the space they occupy in between
#to be or not to be. that is the question#ty adam for being my model for dramatic vampire moment#musings on the thinkings about:#when to live you are required to hurt others. you must repeatedly ask yourself what the value of your life is#To sleep... perchance to dream...#ah. THERES THE RUB.#ok I actually couldnt come up with too many thoughts. I had a lot more while I was drawing this but I guess I put them in the painting LOL#reading that soliloquy and being like damn this is just like vampires#the reality of course is that the soliloquy is a debate over suicide and ultimately making the choice to live#even if just out of fear of the unknown#and vampires are about dying and then in undeath choosing to continue to live#despite the fear of eternity and loneliness and hurting others#theyre not the same. but like let me thiiink come onnnn I'm allowed to thiiink and have incomplete thoughts#I would have to write like a proper essay about this to organize my thoughts. this is the tags on a tumblr post.#anyways finished episode 79#working on patreon stickers for this month (and next month soon)#and working on book 4. taking a pause from episodes cause I've got 3 weeks of buffer now... UGH#I'm so mad that they changed it. it would have been 5 weeks before but it's fine it's whatever#anyways yeah taking a break from episodes to make my book now!#its good stuff.#and this painting is good stuff#banger after banger from me tbh#this was a little relaxing giving myself a couple hours to muse#it's necessary for my health and I always forget that til I do a painting...#I loved doing the little landscape in the background too I should do that more! I love how plants are just like whatever shape you want#like you can make up any plant you want and not only does that plant PROBABLY exist somewhere#a weirder plant exists somewhere too. so. literally whatever you want#ok bye again for a few days while I get back to work
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rewatched madoka magica again today bc i fucking hate myself and to absolutely no one’s surprise i went through all five stages of grief in a single evening
#let’s talk about sayaka miki for a second#genuinely the fact that her whole character is centered around tragedy almost to a shakespearean extent#she’s selfless and brave and values her justice and righteousness above all. calls herself an ally of justice#in fact i think it’s rather intriguing how her whole character is centered around “justice”#her story being a more twisted retelling of the original little mermaid#how she is initially portrayed as a very heroic and confident character even before becoming a magical girl. always shielding madoka#selling her soul to heal the boy she loved out of a selfless desire to see him well again#her being absolutely distraught abt being robbed of her humanity and betrayed by kyubey#she combats this harrowing realization by immersing herself in her duties not caring that she is slowly deteriorating in the process#becoming numb with pain and fighting recklessly and psychotically trying to drown out the pain#finally coming to the sickening conclusion that humanity doesn’t deserve her saving and she succumbs to a fate of her making#last words being “i was so stupid” which trumps her previous statement of “there’s no way i’d regret this”#ALSO? the fact that her costume and weapon are symbolic of a knight. she rly portrays this hero of justice who will protect and defend ☹️#i think abt the fact that homura said that sayaka’s wish was so selfless it was only a matter of time before she died#sayaka being the example of what happens to magical girls who go through the entire cycle and eventually become witches is so sad to me#genuinely just like. sick and twisted#very very fucked up.#characters who have their own misconstrued interpretation of “justice” or who are centered around justice in general.#you will always be dear to me.#sayaka reminds me a lot of akechi in some ways ngl#harboring an almost idealized vision of justice but it slowly rots and festers and corrupts their hearts the more immersed w it they become#actually losing their sanity when they fight bc of how much pain they’re in but refuse to acknowledge it until they break#refusing any help and wallowing in misery despite having ppl who love them and want to save them#last words are those expressing regret for being such a fool. for being ignoring#being used by yhe main villain as a stepping stone towards their true goal. they were merely a pawn#also doomed in every version of their reality. always doomed by the narrative no matter what choices they make#i have a type i fear#HAHAHAH ALSO the fact that they’re both dressed so regally compared to everyone else in their respective series#meant to portray them in a virtuous and princely light. only made more apparent by the sword being their weapon of choice#i’m gonna shut up now but they’re soo eerily similar its unnerving tbh 💀
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i think that if they reunited again luffy would crash into sabo so hard that there's an impact frame and in the next frame they're just gone
#one piece#sabo#luffy#monkey d luffy#revolutionary sabo#flame emperor sabo#sketch#they deserve to meet again please#Please.#literally my top 2 OP favs i cannot shut up about them i fear#nor do i stop thinking about them... they drive me insane get them out of my head
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Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!
I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.
#fe three houses#ferdinand von aegir#discord emotes#i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but#i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share#since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself#the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but#some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts#so those im gonna skip on lol#whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em#i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones#if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use#i used concernednand (the upper one) so much#the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time#debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love#fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist#someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet#and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art#and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet#and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote#and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server#some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me#cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog#and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog#so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here#so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao#anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server#i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away
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shathann fucked up in so many ways with raising taash but she also makes me. so so SO sad. welcome back deeply flawed dragon age mother figures in various shades of 'well. I mean you tried. I guess' (from 'not at all' to 'I can see what you thought you were going for at least' as appropriate) we tango once more
#american masc rook's delivery of 'then why did you leave?' is so fucking good. felt that right down to my toes.#I personally find shathann much more sympathetic than leandra hawke because I do think she really is doing the very best she knew how#with the extremely limited resources and background she'd been given. learning a bit too late that raising a kid isn't an academic debate#where like. I think leandra frequently fails to do parenting stuff just as much because it's easier/more comfortable for her to not do it#and I find sheer emotional laziness being allowed to do that kind of harm just. infuriating!!!!!! maddening!!!#but I think this is uh. one of those that's probably going to depend on your own personal history and experiences big time haha.#no wrong way to feel about it just personal tender spots#caterina just fucking sucks tho she keeps burning these kids up basically for financial reasons lmao#(it's more complicated than that and I think she probably also *did* genuinely fear for their survival if she let them be 'soft'#I mean. how couldn't she be afraid after all that shit. but that does not make it better or less fucked up what she did. and keeps doing)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#shathann#every time taash calls shathann 'tama' I curl up in physical pain for a while before I can be functional again
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So I play Dislyte pretty regularly and the design for the Poseidon character is just so... IHAD to do it!
The Hades one had to go through a more extreme makeover to make it feel more Nico-esque though (it has a couple subtle design nods to Velinxi's Young Gods AU too!)
This was supposed to be a take on @percico-nicercy-events 's fest btw, Day 5: Undersea Prince Percy and Underworld Prince Nico but yeah, I'm way behind;;
Next up is a 14 panel comic!
#percico#nicercy#pjo#percy jackson#nico di angelo#man this took so much time and effort#I'm n e v e r attempting the lineless/vectorial style of that game again#it looks really good but my entire body hurts holy shit#also giving Nico oranges and reds instead of purples and greens ended up looking super interesting and contrasting#I feared both color schemes would be too diametrically opposed to each other... and they kinda are but still look nice#I think#I wanted to make them complement each other <3#yapping about character design and color schemes and symbolism again
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