#no wrong way to feel about it just personal tender spots
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vaguely-concerned · 1 month ago
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shathann fucked up in so many ways with raising taash but she also makes me. so so SO sad. welcome back deeply flawed dragon age mother figures in various shades of 'well. I mean you tried. I guess' (from 'not at all' to 'I can see what you thought you were going for at least' as appropriate) we tango once more
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peppermintquartz · 1 month ago
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Buck volunteers for the Thanksgiving shift. When Maddie asks, he apologizes, saying, "I don't really feel festive right now. But keep some leftovers for me?"
On the day, firehouses around the country all have similar calls to deal with: kitchen grease fires from frying turkeys, sprains in backyard games of football, people injuring one another because "did you hear what she said about our Emma/Francis/Kailey?". Buck is kept too busy to think, and it's nice having the time to catch up with Ravi, who's thinking of going to school to study law.
Their brothers and sisters in uniform also drop off dishes at the station, so between calls, they get pretty good food. Captain Graham gives them an hour offline after four consecutive calls. Buck collapses into a chair and serves himself pasta salad and a delicious honey baked ham, while his dinner rolls warm up in the oven.
He's scrolling through his phone, diligently avoiding the messaging apps, when a message preview pops up.
Tommy.
Buck almost drops his fork. He scrambles away from the dinner table, even though no one on C shift will try to take his phone from him, and finds a spot in the stairwell to read it.
Tommy: hope you have a good & safe Thanksgiving
As he's reading, another bubble appears and Buck's heart skips several beats, but this time it doesn't disappear. A second message arrives, followed by a third.
Tommy: don't know why I texted that
Tommy: guess I just wanted to say something to you
Tommy: you don't have to reply
Tommy: anyway. Happy holidays
Buck feels a slight loosening of the vice around his heart that has been there since that night. With a smile on his face, he types, deletes, types again.
Buck: happy Thanksgiving to you too
Buck: how many kitchen grease fires you got this year? We had 3
Tommy: you're working today?
Tommy: 4, but one of it was in the backyard
They're having a conversation. They're having an actual casual conversation, as easy as they used to on calmer shifts. Buck wants to cry. But he has to answer Tommy's question or have this conversation end too soon. Thinking about his options, he decides that he has nothing to lose anyway.
Buck: I didn't wanna sit around and smile and pretend I'm thankful for everything
Buck: it's better to keep busy
Tommy: I know that feeling
Tommy: I'm sorry
Buck: I'm sorry too
Buck: I wish we could've celebrated together
Buck: I would've said that I'm thankful for you
Tommy: I would have said that too
Tommy: I'm still thankful for you jsyk. I'll always be grateful to have got to know you
Does Tommy think he can't stay in Buck's life just because they broke up?
Buck: I don't think you know me well enough
Tommy: sorry
Buck wishes he'd run after Tommy that night, or done something since to show that he wants Tommy. Well, here's your chance, his brain reminds him. Do something.
He takes a deep breath. Then he types.
Buck: I want to meet. If I come over after Thanksgiving shift, will you please be home?
Tommy: is that a good idea
Buck: idk. But I can't stop thinking about you, and I miss you, and I wanna know what I did wrong. I wanna meet.
Tommy: I miss you too. You didn't do anything wrong, I just didn't want to... Idk. I didn't want to get my hopes up too much.
Buck: we need to talk in person. Texting is not good enough.
It isn't. He needs to see Tommy again. Tommy with his storm blue eyes and tender smile and broad shoulders and soft clothes. Tommy whose crinkly smile drives Buck a little (a lot) insane. Tommy whose lips he now knows the shape of by touch alone, whose body he has mapped out in detail, who knows how it feels to be inside Buck in the most intimate of ways.
He waits for a response. Hopes there will be one. It comes several minutes after, like Tommy had to really think about it.
Tommy: maybe not immediately after Thanksgiving shift
Tommy: are you off on Monday
The relief that crashes into Buck feels almost as overwhelming as the tsunami he was caught in years ago.
Buck: yes
Buck: your place this time
Buck: I'll bring cake
Tommy: you don't have to bribe me to open the door
Buck: no I just baked too much stuff is all. I'll explain when we meet
Buck: I'm really thankful you texted
Tommy: I'm thankful you replied
Tommy: have a good rest of the shift, Evan
It's Evan again. Buck can't hide his smile at all. Tucking his phone into his pocket, he goes back to dinner. Monday can't be here fast enough.
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hsnlv · 6 days ago
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“all mine.” (altered) | s.jy
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pairing: boyfriend!jake x fem!reader
synopsis: a moment of doubt clouds your mind, but jake’s gentle touch and heartfelt words remind you just how loved and perfect you truly are in his eyes.
warnings/others: insecurity, jake is sickeningly sweet in this one :(
wc: 1.04k
a/n: as written, this is actually my old work that i decided to re-write! i hope this will give you comfort like it does to me <3 reblogs and comments are highly appreciated!! happy reading my loves🎀 here’s my masterlist!
🎧now playing!🎧: take you there- h.e.r
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“c’mere,” jake pats his lap with that playful grin you can never resist, the one that makes your heart do flips. his voice is soft but teasing, like he’s already expecting you to curl up in his arms. it’s your spot—his lap, his warmth, his everything. it’s where you feel safest, where you always feel loved.
but today, you hesitate. something in you feels… different. heavier. you glance down at your thighs, your stomach, catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror out of the corner of your eye. it’s silly, really. you know it’s just your mind playing tricks on you, but the thought sneaks in anyway.
“i’m fine,” you mumble, staying rooted in place. your arms fold over your stomach as you avoid his gaze, hoping he won’t push.
but he’s jake.
he notices everything.
his teasing smile fades just a little, replaced with that soft, tender look he gets when he knows you’re feeling off.
“baby,” he says, his voice gentle as he scoots closer. his arms reach for you, wrapping around your waist and pulling you to him like it’s the easiest thing in the world. “what’s wrong?”
you shake your head, trying to brush it off. “nothing. just tired.”
“hmm.” he doesn’t buy it. not for a second. instead, he nuzzles into the crook of your neck, his lips brushing lightly against your skin as he murmurs, “tired of what, hmm? me? ‘cause if that’s the case, you’re breaking my heart here.”
you can’t help the soft laugh that escapes you, though you try to smother it. “jake…”
“there she is,” he teases, pulling back just enough to look at you. his fingers slide under your chin, tilting your face toward his. “there’s my girl. now, are you gonna tell me what’s really going on? or do i have to guess?”
you hesitate again, biting your lip, but the way he’s looking at you… like you’re the only thing in the universe that matters. it’s too much.
“i don’t know,” you finally mumble, your voice barely above a whisper. “i just… i feel… different today.”
his brows knit together, confusion flickering across his face for a moment before realization dawns.
“oh,” he breathes out, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek. “it’s one of those days, huh?”
you nod, feeling a little silly now. “yeah.”
jake sighs, but not in frustration. it’s that soft, loving sigh he does when he’s about to say something that’ll make your heart melt.
“baby,” he starts, pulling you closer until you’re practically sitting in his lap, your legs draped over his. his hands settle on your waist, holding you like you’re something precious. “you know none of that stuff matters to me, right? like… at all. i don’t care if you think you feel different or look different. to me, you’re always gonna be my favorite person.”
you can’t help but roll your eyes, though there’s a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. “you’re just saying that.”
“i’m not!” he insists, looking mock-offended. “do you want me to prove it? i’ll prove it. actually—hold on.”
before you can stop him, he’s reaching for his phone, typing furiously with one hand while the other keeps you firmly in place. a second later, he holds up the screen.
“you’re literally the prettiest person i’ve ever seen and i will fight anyone who says otherwise.”
“there,” he declares proudly. “proof. now you can’t argue with me.”
you snort, burying your face in his shoulder. “you’re ridiculous.”
“and you’re gorgeous,” he counters, his voice dropping to that soft, serious tone that always makes your chest ache in the best way.
his hands trail down to your thighs, squeezing gently. “see these? i love these. and this?” he taps your nose lightly, grinning when you scrunch it up. “adorable. and don’t even get me started on your smile. do you have any idea how hard it is to focus on anything when you’re smiling at me?”
“jake…” you mumble, your face heating up as you try to hide your grin.
“nope. not done,” he says, leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. “this face? my favorite. this laugh?” he pokes your side, earning a giggle. “even better. and don’t even think about arguing with me, because i’ll just keep going until you agree.”
you laugh again, the sound light and genuine this time, and jake’s smile grows even wider.
“there she is,” he murmurs, his voice warm and full of adoration. “that’s my girl.”
he leans down, guiding you gently onto the bed, his body hovering over yours as he peppers kisses across your face.
“mine,” he whispers, kissing your forehead.
“all mine,” he adds, brushing his lips against your nose.
“the most perfect girl in the whole world,” he finishes, punctuating his words with a kiss to your lips.
you can’t help but giggle. “jake.”
“yeah?” he murmurs, his forehead resting against yours while his face is plastered with that stupidly handsome boyish grin he has always had.
“you make it really hard to stay upset, you know that?”
his lips twitch into a smile. “good. that’s kind of the point.”
“so beautiful,” he murmurs, his eyes scanning your features like he’s trying to memorize every inch of you. “it’s actually unreal.”
“stop,” you mumble, your cheeks heating up again.
“never,” he replies, grinning as he leans down to press kisses all over your face. each kiss sends a flutter through your chest, the warmth of his lips chasing away the lingering insecurities in your mind.
“you’re impossible,” you manage through a laugh, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer.
“and you’re perfect,” he counters, his voice soft and earnest.
his hand moves to brush a strand of hair from your face, his fingers lingering on your cheek. “you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, and I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure you know that.”
it’s in the way he says it—like it’s not just a compliment, but a promise. and for the first time all day, you feel the weight of your doubts start to lift.
wrapped in his arms, surrounded by his warmth and love, you think that maybe—just maybe—he’s right.
© all rights reserved | hsnlv 2024
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girlkisser13 · 3 months ago
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being married to james "logan" howlett would include
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• logan's protective nature is heightened when it comes to you. whether it’s shielding you from danger or simply ensuring you have a coat on a cold day, his instincts to keep you safe are always present.
• you and logan often go on adventurous trips together, from hiking through dense forests to exploring remote locations. he enjoys these moments of peace with you, away from the chaos of his usual life.
• logan isn’t the best with words, but he shows his love through actions. he’ll fix things around the house, cook breakfast, and take care of anything that might be bothering you without being asked.
• despite his rough exterior, logan appreciates the quiet moments with you. he loves sitting together by the fireplace, a glass of whiskey in his hand, enjoying the simple pleasure of your company.
• logan struggles with his past and often has nightmares or moments of doubt. you’ve become his anchor, the one person who can calm him down when the memories become too much. he never thought he’d find someone who could handle his darkness, but you’ve proven him wrong time and again.
• you’re one of the few people he allows himself to be vulnerable around. he shares his fears, his regrets, and his hopes with you. your relationship is built on mutual trust and understanding, a bond that he never thought he’d have in his life.
• logan has a dry sense of humor, and he loves to tease you in a lighthearted way. it might be a comment about how you can’t keep up with him on a run or how you hog the blankets at night. it’s his way of showing affection, and it always makes you smile.
• he’s not overly affectionate in public, but in private, he’s incredibly tender. he’ll wrap his arms around you from behind, nuzzle his face into your neck, and kiss the top of your head, murmuring how much you mean to him.
• logan is fiercely loyal to you. he would go to any lengths to protect and defend you, no matter the cost. You are the one constant in his chaotic life, and he values that more than anything.
• he often trains with you, whether it’s sparring or teaching you self-defense. it’s his way of ensuring that you’re capable of handling yourself if he’s not around. plus, he secretly enjoys watching you hold your own against him.
• logan can get a bit jealous, especially if he senses someone might be interested in you. his feral side can come out, and he’ll make it clear that you’re his. but you know how to calm him down, reminding him that he’s the only one for you.
• despite his rough exterior and sometimes gruff demeanor, he’s always gentle with you. whether it's holding your hand or helping you with something, he treats you with a level of care that shows how much he cherishes you.
• logan enjoys cooking, especially when it’s for you. you often cook together, and he loves watching you try to keep up with his culinary skills. there’s a playful competition between you two, but he secretly loves when you take over, especially if it’s a dish you’re passionate about.
• you both cherish the mornings when you wake up before the world does. he will brew coffee, and you’ll sit together on the porch, wrapped in a blanket, watching the sunrise. these quiet, peaceful moments are some of his favorites.
• logan is a bit of a wanderer, so sometimes you’ll pack up and just hit the road. these trips are spontaneous, often with no clear destination in mind. you’ll spend hours talking or sitting in comfortable silence, enjoying the open road and each other’s company.
• despite his rugged persona, he is surprisingly good at planning special dates. he’ll take you to a hidden spot in the woods for a picnic or to a little-known jazz club in the city. he knows how to make these moments feel intimate and unique, showing you just how much he cares.
• logan’s enhanced senses mean he’s very attuned to your scent. He finds comfort in it, and when you’re apart, he’ll wear one of your sweaters or keep something with your scent close to him. it grounds him and helps him feel connected to you even when you’re not physically there.
• he has a tattoo dedicated to you. it’s a personal symbol, something that reminds him of you and your love. it’s one of the few permanent things he’s ever had, and he likes the idea of carrying that piece of you with him always.
• logan isn’t much for texting or phone calls, so he leaves you handwritten notes around the house. they’re often simple, like "breakfast is ready" or "miss you, see you tonight," but they mean the world to you.
• he has moments of surprising tenderness. he’ll brush your hair out of your face, trace the outline of your features with his fingers, or cradle you in his arms like you’re the most precious thing in the world.
• logan loves reading, and the two of you often share books. you’ll recommend novels to each other, and he’ll surprise you with rare editions of your favorite books. it’s a quiet way of bonding, discussing the stories and characters over a glass of wine.
• the two of you have developed a way of communicating without words. a look, a touch, or even the slightest change in body language is enough for you to understand each other. it’s a testament to the deep connection you share.
• logan has an immense amount of patience when it comes to you. whether you’re upset, confused, or frustrated, he never loses his temper. he’s calm, steady, and supportive, knowing exactly how to help you through whatever you’re facing.
• he LOVES to surprise you with unexpectedly romantic gestures. he’ll bring you wildflowers he picked on his way home, or he’ll play a song on an old record player, pulling you into a slow dance in the living room. he’s not traditionally romantic, but his unique gestures show his deep love for you.
• logan is extremely vigilant in social settings, even if it’s just a casual gathering. he keeps an eye on your surroundings, making sure you’re comfortable and safe. if anyone makes you uncomfortable, he’s quick to intervene.
• despite his long life and all the losses he’s endured, logan dares to dream about a future with you. he talks about places he wants to take you, things he wants to experience together, and the kind of life you could build. you’re the first person who’s made him believe in forever. <33
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prythianpages · 7 months ago
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Dandelions | Azriel
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Azriel x Green Witch Reader | The moment in which you realize you're in love.
word count: 1,713
warnings: fluff, kissing
a/n: Surprise Surprise! This is my 1,000th post on this blog and I wanted to dedicate it to Green Witch reader <3 This can be read as a stand alone. I was on reddit when I saw a comment that reminded me of these two and I just had to write it out before I lost inspiration, even though it was midnight when I saw it.
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Walking through the cobblestone streets of Velaris, your heart feels light and content, further lifted by the enchantment that seems to weave through every building and tree. The rain from the afternoon had left behind shimmering puddles and brought upon a misty evening. Warm and humid, the air was alive with the croak of contented toads and the delicate flutter of moths.
As a green witch, your connection to nature runs deep. You cherish all living things, from the majestic trees lining the streets to the smallest insects that flit about underfoot. Many might find them insignificant, even terrifying. But to you, they’re lovely.
Yet, among all the wonders of Velaris, it's the shadowsinger walking slightly ahead of you who captivates your heart the most. 
His dark hair, damp from the mist, clings to the back of his neck. It curls at the ends and you’re sure there’s a matching, distinctive curl of hair or two that falls down over his forehead that you would love to run your fingers through. His wings are tucked into him and though his back is turned toward you, you notice the slight tilt of his head downwards. 
You also can’t help but notice the way his shadows slither along the ground in front of you both. Almost as if they’re clearing a path for the both of you. You don’t think much of it, even though you’re usually the one walking slightly ahead. Azriel is always attentive to your surroundings.
Your lips curve into a tender smile as you continue to admire him from behind. The mating bond hums softly between you. You give a tug and it’s instant, the way your chest swells with warmth as he responds. He doesn’t turn around but you catch the subtle twitch of his right wing. Something you notice he does when flustered or blushing.
Though you both are now aware of the mating bond or at least now aware that you both are aware, you came to a mutual agreement to take things slow.  So Azriel courted you, determined to right the wrongs of his initial coldness. His efforts to show you his true self, the side he's always wanted you to see, have been nothing short of enchanting.
You always suspected there was more to Azriel than the stoic warrior facade he presented to you. And as the days turned into weeks, he revealed layers of his personality that left you breathless.
You discovered his love for reading, the way his eyes softened when he spoke about his favorite books. He took you to his favorite hidden spots in Velaris that he wanted to share only with you. 
One evening, he surprised you with a picnic by the Sidra River. Since you could not prepare him food due to the bond, he had taken it upon himself to prepare all your favorite foods. 
His gestures were not always grand, but they were always meaningful. Like the time he spent hours helping you gather rare herbs for your potions. Or the quiet evenings you spent in his arms, where words were unnecessary.  Yet, he never stayed the night, always leaving before it got too late.
“y/n?”
“Yes?” 
You hadn’t realized he’d been talking to you, too lost in your thoughts.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes,” you say again, seeing that you have reached your small townhome. Your apothecary is located right next door, the sign swaying slightly despite the lack of wind.
The fae lights hanging from your door’s overhang flicker on as the sun begins to set, casting a warm glow over the entrance. From the window, you spot a set of two glowing eyes watching you, bringing forth a smile. It’s your cat, Binx. He blinks at you in greeting.
Azriel draws your attention back to him as he carefully makes his way up the three steps that lead to your door. He offers you his hand, not wanting you to slip on the wet cobblestone. You take his hand, the warmth of his touch sending a pleasant shiver up your spine. His fingers intertwine with yours, strong yet gentle.
“Thank you,” you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper. 
Azriel’s gaze locks onto yours, his hazel eyes warm with emotion. “I’d do anything for you,” he replies softly, his thumb brushing lightly over your knuckles. There’s a vulnerability in his voice, a raw honesty that makes your heart ache. 
He steps closer and the space between you seems to hum with the energy of the bond you share. You find yourself giving in to the irresistible pull of that bond, wrapping your arms around his neck, and bringing his head down toward yours. Your lips meet in a tender kiss, a soft and delicate exchange but as the hands at your waist travel upwards, it morphs into something more heated. A kiss that speaks volumes about the growing connection between you two. 
His hands cradle your face, one moving to the back of your head as he gently pushes you against your door. It’s when your tongue traces along his bottom lip that he pulls away. “You should go inside before the rain comes down again,” he breathes but you catch the way his pupils flare as he gazes down at your swollen lips. Droplets begin to fall from the sky yet neither of you move.
“I should,” you reply, your eyes sparkling with mischief as you pull him back in for another kiss.
**
You linger by the window, fingers pressed against your lips, drawn to the sight of Azriel walking away in the gentle drizzle. It wasn’t your first kiss and certainly not the last. Each kiss only further fueled the desire between you both but you two had agreed to wait to be intimate with one another until you’re ready to accept the bond. Something that was becoming a struggle with every passing day.
As you watched Azriel go, you saw something that made your heart skip a beat. He was pausing every few steps, his fingers gently lifting what appeared to be small worms off the wet pavement and guiding them to safety in the lush greenery that bordered the streets. His shadows danced around his feet, helping him.
And then it hit you—why Azriel’s attention had been on the ground as he walked you home earlier, why his shadows had been forming a pathway. He was saving the worms from being stepped on. Tears welled up in your eyes, and before you knew it, you were slipping out your door and running toward him.
“Azriel!”
Azriel turns, his brows furrowing in concern as soon as he sees you. He raises one hand—the one that hadn’t been picking up the worms—to caress your cheek, his thumb gently wiping away a rogue tear. “Why are you crying?” he asks, frowning.
“Because you’re so sweet and thoughtful and kind and I love you and—”
“You love me?” he interrupts softly, his right wing twitching as a blush creeps onto his cheeks.
“Yes, you. I love you and only you,” you repeat, voice trembling with the weight of your feelings.
And then he’s kissing you again, letting his lips convey those three words for him.
**
You glance over at Azriel, his focused expression making your heart swell with what you’re now certain is love. Every time he looks your way, his gaze softens and you feel like you’re about to burst.
His eyes had widened slightly when you had offered to help, not realizing he’d been caught. He had protested, claiming you’d only get sick if you stayed out in the rain with him. But you had ignored him, kneeling down on the damp ground.
So now you both were kneeling on the ground, the cool rain soaking through your clothes as you helped the small bugs to a safer path. Azriel’s shadows were eager to help as well, nudging worms and beetles your way. A bit too eager, as they sometimes sent the bugs skittering away toward the grass, and you couldn’t help but laugh at the playful chaos.
Just as you’re about to pick up another worm, a small movement catches your eye. A toad hops out from under a bush. Azriel startles but you grin, scooping it up into your hands. When he inches away from you, your eyes light up in mischief.
Before he knows it, you’re chasing him around, the toad held out in front of you. Azriel dodges and weaves, his laughter mingling with yours in the rain. His shadows seem to be on your side as one sneaky tendril crosses over his leg and he trips. You fall over him, the both of you collapsing in a heap on the wet grass. The toad hops out of your hold, much to Azriel’s relief. You’re both breathless and grinning.
"Do you still love me now?" You tease.
“More than anything,” he replies immediately, his wings stretching out under him to fold over you and shield you from the rain.
“Would you still love me if I were a toad?” You challenge.
Azriel laughs, his hazel eyes twinkling as he pulls you closer. Your head rests on his chest. “Even if you were a toad. I’d find a way to become one with you,” he says, the sincerity in his tone nearly bringing you to tears again, as he presses a kiss to the top of your head. 
The rain grows heavier, and the two of you finally decide to seek shelter, running back into your home. When you ask him to stay the night, he doesn’t hesitate to say yes. After washing up and changing into comfortable clothes—Feyre had magically sent Azriel fresh garments at his request—the two of you nestle into the comforting warmth of your bed.
It’s not big enough to accommodate his wings. Something you're already working on replacing. He doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, it only gives him more reason to hold you closer.
Your back is flush against his chest, one of his strong arms draped protectively over your waist as you both watch the rain patter against the bedroom window. His chin rests gently atop your head and you close your eyes, feeling utterly safe and cherished. 
The bond between you sings with contentment, but it’s the love dwelling within that bond that makes your heart overflow with joy.
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a/n: This takes place after the first imagine but before you accept the bond with a witchy ritual as mentioned in these HCs, which I may or may not write. In my mind, Azriel fell first but you fell harder. Not only is this the first time you say I love you but also the first time he stays the night.
series tag list:@fxckmiup, @aria-chikage
General tag list: @scooobies, @kennedy-brooke, @sillysillygoose444, @lilah-asteria @the-sweet-psycho
@daycourtofficial, @milswrites, @stormhearty, @pit-and-the-pen, @mybestfriendmademe
@loving-and-dreaming
[series masterlist]
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after-witch · 1 month ago
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Quicksilver Girl [Yandere FF7!Remnant Trio x Reader]
Title: Quicksilver Girl [Remnant Trio x Reader]
Synopsis: You help a silver-haired man and his silver-haired brothers find their way in the city–didn’t anyone ever tell you not to talk to strangers? 
Word count: 11,000ish
Notes: yandere, threats of violence, stalking, mommy issues
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It was a solid testament to the bittersweetness of the world’s regrowth that the simple sight of an ice cream truck in the city made you want to cry. But for all the destruction that had rained on the city, that had rained on the world; for the terror that was Sephiroth and the near-destruction of the planet, it was these simple sights that healed (and hurt) the most.
It didn’t help that you had especially tender soft spots for children. Oh, soft spots for anyone, really–and your neighbors, the people you worked with, what was left of your family would attest to that. 
When someone said they were hungry, you did your best to feed them. When you overheard someone weeping over a debt, you would lend a coin or an ear or a pen and paper to plot out a way to dig out of a deficit. 
People’s troubles troubled you, and it made you feel better to take care of those around you. Friend and stranger alike. 
“Soft hearts have no place in this world,” you’d overheard your father tell your mother one night, mumbling, half-drunk.
Maybe he was right. Maybe in a world like this, your soft heart would get you into trouble one day. Or it would be hardened out of you like water grooving its way into a rock, with time and troubles. An inevitable weathering. 
But maybe you would be content to be the type of person who smiled and wiped away the edges of tears at the sight of a gaggle of children eagerly buying frozen treats, each running away with a smile–and often, already-melting ice cream–on their lips.
And it wasn’t just the children who wanted to reap the frozen fruits of the ice cream truck’s welcome arrival, you notice–a man, clad in what must be an entirely too-hot black leather outfit, awkwardly making his way to the front of the truck. 
He runs his hands through his cropped silver hair–it almost glitters, in the sun–and looks up and down at the time-worn stickers plastered to the front of the truck. One of the children behind him huffs a little and stands on her toes, bending sideways to peer around him.
The truck driver says something, and the man frowns. He points to one of the stickers and waits, expectantly.
You can’t help but overhear the exchange that follows. 
“If you don’t have any money, move out of the way. There’s kids that are ready to pay.”
The little girl shoves her hands in her pockets, fingers no doubt touching the precious gil she was able to borrow for the treat. 
The man makes a noise, something in between a growl and a whine, as he looks behind him at the growing line of kids–and in front of him, at the unimpressed driver. 
“No fair. It doesn’t say anything about money here!” The young man jabs a finger on the truck and–did the truck rock just a bit? No, of course not–and crosses his arms over his chest. He’s almost like a kid himself, you think, and a familiar tugging sensation in your chest creeps in.
You’re already hustling your way up to the truck, fingers digging into your purse for a few coins, when one of the kids in line lets out a barking, sneering laugh. 
“Everyone knows ice cream costs money! What’re you, stupid?”
Perhaps if you had been a moment later, it all would have gone wrong here. That kid would have been pulverized by an impulsive, angry punch and any bystanders would have fled screaming and you would’ve known to stay far, far away from this man and his silver hair and anyone else who showed up alongside him.
But you were a moment sooner, and nothing went wrong.
Instead, just as the young man turned towards the sneering kid, a scowl on his face, you were primly handing the truck driver enough coins for an ice cream bar.
“Please, let me,” you say, voice soft but firm–a I-won’t-take-no-for-an-answer tone, and the tension from the interaction melts as easily as the ice cream inside the truck under the hot sun. The truck driver shrugs and dips away from his window for a moment, before coming back and holding out a fresh chocolate ice cream bar.
The young man stares at it for a moment, then slowly reaches out to take it. The girl behind him doesn’t wait for him to move, bumping past him to get to the front of the line. And if you hadn’t just enabled him to get the creamy frozen treat he’d clearly wanted, maybe it would have bothered him. 
But he doesn’t seem to notice. He simply stares at you, brows furrowed, gaze looking all sorts of ways. Surprised. Pleased. Annoyed. It’s an expression you’re a bit familiar with; the sort of mixed-emotions that come with favors you didn’t quite ask for, but wanted, anyway.
You don’t take it to heart. You smile and step back from the truck, and he follows–sticking the ice cream into his mouth before abruptly yanking it out, mouth half-opened, a bit of chocolate dribbling on his chin.
“It’s cold,” he says, shock at the edge of his voice. But the heat of the day and his outfit and the richness of the chocolate must overpower the initial trepidation, because he slowly sticks it back in his mouth, savoring it. 
“Have you… never had ice cream?” You ask. You shouldn’t; you should just go, good deed done for the day.
But.
It’s hard not to be curious about him. His outfit is unusual; more like something you’d see in the old days. A roaming thug hired by Shinra, maybe. But they wouldn’t be out in the day, at least not anymore. 
But it’s the rest of him that really stands out. Silver hair that, even cropped short, has a shimmery look in the fun. And his eyes are, well. Unusual to say the least. A vibrant sort of green, like a living light.
His eyes glance towards you, then towards the ground. Shame, maybe.
“Of course I have,” he lies, and your heart pangs just a bit. He wouldn’t be the first person in this world to grow up deprived. The soft, stretchy bit your hard pulls towards him, and you look around for anyone that might know him. Might have come here with him, before he got sidetracked with a sidequest for ice cream. 
But there’s no one that you can see who might call this strangely dressed young man “theirs.” So you worry at your lip with your teeth, weighing the options, before finally asking–softly, kindly. 
“Are you alone?” 
“No.” He looks up at you with something like indignity. “I’m with my brothers.”
There’s a bit of good news. You smile. “Oh! I’m sorry…” But when you look around, there’s no sign of anyone that looks like a brother. The silver hair would be a giveaway, wouldn’t it? 
He looks around, too, and after a moment, meets your gaze with a lost expression that you can’t help but compare to the kids around you.
“They were supposed to meet me here… at… at…” He huffs out a sigh, and pulls out a cell phone. The sight is surprising–they can be pricey, although they are getting a bit more common. He flips open the top and presses a few buttons with his thumb, before holding it up in your face. “Here.”
Oh. He’s in entirely the wrong spot. And if he’s not from the area, there’s no way he’ll find it alone. That soft, squishy part of you squeezes your chest hard and despite hearing your father’s mumbling disapprovals through the metaphorical wall of your mind, you offer another smile.
“That’s on the opposite side of town. It’s a bit of a confusing way… I could walk you?”
A few emotions cross his face. Surprise. Annoyance. And finally, a sort of mild distrust. Again, so much like the children around you. Children who grew up on or off the streets but in a world where the next day was never a guarantee. It hurts a little to see this expression on a grown man, however young he might be. 
“Fine,” he tells you, half-mumbling. “If you want.”
“Well, I do want,” you answer cheerfully, and the surprise on his face doesn’t seem to quite go away even as he begins to follow you, frowning, shoving the rest of his ice cream bar in his mouth. 
The stares you get as you escort this strange young man through the city are worth the feeling of accomplishment you get–warm and fuzzy and light–from helping someone out. Especially someone who seems so lost, in more ways than one.
As for the strange young man himself, he’s not much of a conversationalist–but you’ve never minded doing most of the talking. He seems content to listen, mumbling yeses and no’s, or occasionally asking you questions about buildings you pass. 
He even tells you his name, after a while: “I’m Loz.” 
And if you tell him your name, and he repeats it a bit gruffly, chocolate ice cream on his lips, is it wrong to find it a bit cute?
After all–
It feels good to help someone in need, doesn’t it? 
There’s no mistaking it: the two men standing in front of an abandoned city hall (ruined, more like; no one had enough money to fix it, so the city hall was now in a repurposed hotel) must be his brothers. The silver hair with the same sort of sheen, and nearly matching black leather outfits. Part of you wonders if you ought to have gotten ice cream for them, but it would have melted anyway.
Neither of them look particularly excited to see you. Well, you can’t blame them. You are a stranger. There’s surprise tinged with a wariness and a not-so-thinly veiled irritation, at least on part of what looks to be his younger brother. Silver hair cut short and slightly uneven, like he hacked it off himself. The other brother looks older, with long silky hair that must,  you decide, take forever to comb. 
It’s Loz who breaks the tension, stepping forward, running a hand through his short hair. There’s still some chocolate ice cream left on his mouth. 
“She uh, showed me the way. I got lost.” The brothers’ gaze roams over you. Loz holds up his ice cream stick. “And she bought me this.” When his brothers merely blink at it, he shoves it closer to them. “There was ice cream on it!” 
It is the brother with longer hair who speaks first. Smooth and calm, and you get the image of one of those upper-crust salesmen, the kind who could convince someone to buy a motorbike they couldn’t afford in a thousand years.
“I see.” His gaze turns to you and there’s something in those eyes–the same as Loz, but vaguely different. Whereas Loz felt like a lost dog with a–haha–bone to pick, his gaze feels a bit more intent. Like it could pin you to the floor, if it wanted. “Thank you for assisting our brother,” he says, voice as silky as his hair. 
The younger brother scoffs at that. Scowls. Won’t even look at you. 
Well–you were never one to outstay your welcome. Clearly they have business here, and it certainly doesn't involve you. So you smile at the brother with the long hair and then turn to Loz, half-grin on your face.
“Well, I’ve got to get going. I’m glad you found your brothers! Bye! Be safe, okay?”��
You raise your hand and wave and Loz–to his brothers’ surprise, it’s written on both their faces–waves back. 
“Uh… bye.” 
As you walk away, you can’t shake the feeling of three pairs of eyes on your back. 
You never expected to see Loz again. Or his brothers. Yet it is exactly these three people that suddenly walk through the doors of the diner you waitress at, and how could you not notice? The diner itself seemed to freeze as soon as the door swung open, and a trio of young men with matching silver hair and leather outfits walked through.
While everyone else was keen to stare, you were quick to welcome them. It was hard, being the odd one out; well, in this case, the odd trio out. 
“Good morning,” you chirp, menus already cradled in your arm by force of habit.  “I’m glad to see you!” And you were, a little, in the way you were always happy to see anyone you’d helped again. 
Predictably, Loz is the only one who smiles at you. It’s a shy sort of grin that almost seems out of place on his muscular frame.
“Hey,” he says. “Someone said you worked here, so we… uh…”
In hindsight, this was perhaps the only chance you had to sidestep the horror to come; the only chance to realize you were being sought, and that to be sought by three young men with strange clothing and stranger hair was no simple thing.
But hindsight is never there when we want it to be, and instead of taking the phrase for the warning it ought to have been, you let it wash over you.
“Yep! I’ve been working here for a few years now. Why don’t you sit down?” 
They follow–the youngest first, you realize, and the other two fall in line as you lead them to a corner booth out of the way. Less stares, you think. But what a very strange family dynamic, indeed. From the friends you knew with siblings, it was the oldest who called the shots. But then, the world wasn’t exactly rightside up anymore, was it? Things changed all the time. Even sibling pecking orders.
You dole out the menus as easily as you dole your smiles. Each brother picks up a menu in turn. The youngest looking at it with something like scorn, Loz furrowing his eyebrows, and the brother with long hair and a smooth voice quickly taking in the fare.
“Do you need any help deciding? We’ve got a bit of everything.” 
The brother with the long hair sets down his menu. “May we have three waters?”
You don’t need to jot it down–lots of practice, and all that–so you nod. “Of course! And what can I get you to eat? I’m pretty partial to the sandwiches here myself, but–”
His smile is smoother than his voice, and it’s almost unnerving, almost enough to make you take a step back, when Loz interrupts, mouth pouting, eyes downcast–
“But I’m hungry!” As if on cue, his stomach growls. And not for the first time, you’re struck by how new he seems, despite his appearance and demeanor. And clearly, despite these what-should-be expensive leather outfits, this trio of siblings has fallen on hard times.
Oh, your damned soft heart would get you fired one of these days.
“You know!” Your voice is a bit too high, a bit too chipper. “We actually just had a table return some dishes because I got the order wrong… I was going to have to just throw it out and eat the loss but, if you guys wouldn’t mind taking them?” You smile, a bit crooked. “It would really help me out.”
Loz grins.
The brother with the long hair’s eyes widen, just a fraction, before they return to their serene-like stance. “Thank you,” he says, softly.
The youngest frowns, his lips curling into a bit of a sneer. His brothers look to him, and you’re struck again by the topsy-turvy pecking order you see in them.
Finally, he sighs.
“Fine.”
The brother with the long hair, you finally learn, is called Yazoo. And the youngest–his name cannot be pried out of his own mouth, and it is Yazoo that tells you–is Kadaj. 
They don’t say much about why they’re in town, and you don’t pry. It must be hard enough with everyone staring at them, whispers slinking over from the other tables. Well. With their silver-shimmer hair and leather outfits, it would be hard not to notice them.
Still. You do your best to put them at ease.
Maybe that’s why, when their meals are finished, Yazoo asks you:
“Do you know of a place to stay in the area? Somewhere… affordable, please.” 
Your heart–soft, stupid thing–pangs. There isn’t much in the way of affordability anywhere, but you suspect they already know that. But you know a few people, can pull in some favors. 
“There’s lodgings above the cafe,” you say, pointing to the staircase in the far corner. “It’s where I live, actually! I’ll tell them you’re looking for a place to stay, and we can work something out.” You don’t tell them that “work something out” usually means you picking up extra shifts for free in exchange for someone else getting a discount, because then they might decline your offer, and who knows where they’d end up? 
“That is… much appreciated,” Yazoo replies, weighing his words carefully. Loz looks between his brothers and decides on a nod.
It is the words of Kadaj–his first words properly directed to you without a grimace or huff–that surprise you the most.
“Yeah,” he says, and both his brothers look to him with something akin to surprise of their own as he looks up at you, his own mako-green eyes catching your gaze. “Thanks.” 
It is not quite a surprise that you see the brothers every day. Neither does it shock you that Loz, in particular, seems taken with you; he follows you around the cafe, and you even wrangle him into collecting used dishes when the normal busboy decides to skip out on his shifts. 
He doesn’t like the customers–none of the brothers seem to–but he always beams when you thank him for his hard work. It makes your heart pang, just a bit; where were these three before all this, that simple praise makes him look so happy?
It is, perhaps, Kadaj’s turn that genuinely surprises you. For within the days, the weeks, he goes from sneering at you to quietly popping up by your side when you least expect it. 
When you’re out for a morning errand, he asks to come along, sometimes not saying a word the entire time–sometimes asking questions about everything he sees, which you happily (if a bit sleepily) answer. 
When you’re sitting in the cafe on a rare free hour, reading a book, he (with or without his brothers) slides into the booth and wants to know what you’re reading, and why you’re reading it, and how long you’ve read it for–
When you’re in the back on an overnight shift, doing dishes, he shows himself in the doorway and asks why you’re spending your free time scrubbing other people’s messes.
“It’s not my free time,” you tell him, once. “I’m working.”
He scoffed. “Do you always work all day, then all night?”
You smiled, perhaps a bit of a grimace, given the hot water and occasional wad of tobacco you had to crape off a plate.  “Oh, It’s just–I’ve got some extra bills to pay, so I pick up late shifts sometimes.”
And something in his gaze then–did he know about your deal with the owner? Picking up extra shifts when your bleeding heart got the better of you?--made you want to look away. 
“You shouldn’t work at all,” he muttered, as he pushed himself from the doorframe and left. 
Well.
It was a nice sentiment, but not a realistic one.
One day, Kadaj is not downstairs with his brothers in the cafe when you come down in the morning, apron freshly tied. It is only Loz, sitting in the booth, turning an ashtray over and over in his hands with an almost fittingly ashen expression on his face.
“Loz?”
His head jerks up at the sound of your voice, and you swear–it couldn’t be a trick of the light–that there are tears in his eyes. 
Instantly, you swoop down into the booth, reaching across–fingers grazing the ashtray and taking it from his fingers. He clenches them, keeping them hovering into the air, until you (bold thing) grip his hands in your own.
He stares down at your hand like it’s a foreign object. 
“What’s the matter? Where are your brothers?”
His gaze pulls away from your hands and there’s no mistaking the watery lashline this close up–he has been crying. A pang in your chest makes you squeeze his fingers. Poor dear. Poor Loz.
“Kadaj is–there’s something wrong with him.” His lips pout, and up close, you can see them quiver. 
“What’s wrong with him?” You keep your voice soft and slow; like how your teacher used to talk to you, when you fell on the playground and couldn’t articulate what happened through your blubbering lips.
“He’s…” Loz frowns, squeezes his eyes shut. “His head is really warm. And he’s coughing!” He says the next part too loudly, and a few early-morning heads turn towards the booth. “I think he might be…” The word dying does not come out, but it’s there, written in his worry-stricken face.
You fight against the urge for an indulgent smile. Instead, you squeeze Loz’s hands, and he makes the softest noise of surprise. “It sounds like it’s a cold.”
Loz frowns deeper. “A… cold?” 
You do smile, now. Not out of pity but that sense of warm upcoming accomplishment: if there’s any type of crisis you’re completely capable of handling, it’s a simple cold. “Yes. Let me get some things together, and we’ll go take care of him, okay?”
Loz pulls one of his hands from your grip, slow and reluctant; but only so that he can wipe away his tears with the back of his hand. 
How endearing–if strange–these brothers have come to be in your eyes, you think, as you begin to create a mental list of supplies to bring up to their room.
For once, Yazoo does not look perfectly serene and put-together. He looks–well. Frazzled. Hairs out of place, a dull darkness lining underneath his eyes, and you sense a sort of soft fracture in his expression that widens when you step through the open doorway, Loz just behind you.
There are a million things that enter your mind when you enter their rented room–how sparse it looks with so few personal items, for one; how uncomfortable it must be for them to squeeze into the small space, for two–but foremost on your mind is that Kadaj is never going to get better like this. 
Curled up on a bed wearing his full leather outfit, shivering, sweat plastered to his forehead. You can see the remnants of where Yazoo has attempted to tend to him, but in all the wrong ways–not that you can blame him, considering how inexperienced and naive these strange silver brothers can be.
Kadaj is so out of it that he doesn’t realize you’re in the room for a few long moments. When he does turn his head, his gaze narrows.
“Who said you could come?” He murmurs, bitterly. “Go away. I’m not well.” 
Your lips press down and your hands find themselves moving to your hips. You feel like your mother, in more ways than one.
“That’s why I’m here.” You glance at Loz, at Yazoo, then back at Kadaj. “You’re not well, and we’re going to get you better.” You take a glance around the room–at blankets strewn about, none of them on Kadaj to keep him warm; at half-empty glasses of murky liquid that may or may not have once been milk from downstairs; at trash, bits and bobs, things that make the place cluttered–and your thoughts click into place.
“Loz, Yazoo,” you say, gentle, but firm, as you set your bag down on a thankfully clear side table. “The first thing is to get this place clean. People heal better in clean spaces.” You nod towards the cups, the blankets, everything else strewn about the room. “You two clean that up while I get to work on your brother, okay?”
There’s a brief moment where the two brothers glance at each other, then at Kadaj, sick and sweaty on the bed. He huffs out through his nose and turns away, which must mean something to the two of them, because they both get to work on clearing up the room. 
It’s cute, in a way.
It would be cuter if it didn’t leave you with a sense of pity in your stomach; just how did these three grow up, if this is how they lived? 
But there would be time to think about that later, when Kadaj was better. 
You’ll start with his choice of sick outfit.
“Kadaj,” you say, lowering your voice, taking a step forward. “You need to change into something more comfortable. A loose shirt and trousers.” 
He doesn’t look at you, not yet. Instead, he curls in further, and says, low but clear: “No.”
Ah, there’s that stubbornness from when you first met rising forward. Pride, too, you think. Well–what man wanted to be sick and weak in front of someone else? Especially someone he followed around like some sort of strange puppy with increasing frequency.
Your hands go to your hips. A well-practiced gesture your mother used to give you when you were equally stubborn. “Kadaj,” you insist. “You are going to change into something more comfortable. No ifs, ands, or buts.” 
It’s like the air gets sucked out of the room. Loz and Yazoo pause, each of them halfway to picking up something strewn about the room, looking to Kadaj. Kadaj, for his part, seems to scrunch. His expression, his body–before he looks to you with an expression almost as unreadable as the ones he gives you in the kitchen on certain evenings.
Mixed in with the urge to roll your eyes–men could be so dramatic–is a sprinkle of uneasiness in your stomach. 
“Fine,” Kadaj mumbles, finally, unfurling on the bed and sitting up. You pluck up a discarded sleep shirt and what appears to be sweatpants and hold them out. When Kadaj takes them, you just manage to resist the urge to smile–you don’t want to poke his wounded pride, after all. 
As he leaves to get dressed, you finally attend to your supplies. Inside of your bag is a hefty container of freshly made warm soup–your mother’s recipe, of course–and a batch of cold medicine. The sight of it makes you want to hum; it’s nostalgic, these trinkets from the days of being-cared-for. 
When you turn, all three brothers are standing in front of the bed. It’s a bit like something out of a story. There’s the brief thought of being a governess to abandoned children, but it is brief; these aren’t children, and you are just helping out three young men who seem ill-equipped to deal with life on their own.
“Let’s get you tucked into bed,” you say, and you watch as Kadaj slowly climbs onto the bed, his face turned to watch you–like an animal, you think, afraid to turn around. All the while Loz and Yazoo stand to the side, looking anxious. For his health? Or waiting to see if he’ll huff about being told what to do? Perhaps, you think, a little bit of both.
And you haven’t even made him take the medicine yet. It’ll be the worst part, you know from experience. The taste is–well. It tastes like medicine. But better the taste of medicine than to be sick. That’s what your mother used to say.
It’s what you say, when you hand Kadaj the spoon, he takes it into his mouth, and promptly chucks it towards the wall. 
“Perhaps there’s another medicine we could use,” Yazoo offers. Calm, like always, with a hint of something else underneath. It’s probably not the first time his younger brother has expressed… displeasure at doing something he doesn’t want to do.
“Nope,” you say, cheerfully, retrieving the spoon and doling out another dosage. “This is the best medicine in town.” You sit down on the end of the mattress, and hold the spoon to his mouth. “Here, we’ll do it the way my mom used to.” 
You don’t miss the way Kadaj tenses; the way Yazoo and Loz tense too, the creak of their leather a telltale giveaway. 
“One spoonful of medicine,” you murmur. “Then you can have as much soup as you want. Okay?” Kadaj eyes you warily, and you can’t help but smile, indulgent, soft. Like baked bread out of the oven. “I promise, the soup tastes much better than the medicine.”
There are a few almost ridiculously tense moments–you’re tempted to shove the spoon into his mouth, for goodness’ sake–before Kadaj opens his lips. You slide the spoon in and tilt it, and he swallows it down, grimacing all the while.
“There,” you say, beaming. “That wasn’t so hard! You’ll just need a dose of this every 2 hours–”
“What?” 
Sometimes you can forget how young he seems–no, not young exactly. Green. Like he sprung fully formed out of the ground, all green shoots, and nothing substantial underneath. 
“Every two hours,” you continue, ignoring his outburst. “And drink some soup afterwards. It’ll help with the taste and help you feel better.” The mattress creaks when you stand up and retrieve the container of soup, along with a second, medicineless spoon. 
“I have to go in for my shift. If it’s too hard to eat, let your brothers feed you, okay?” You glance towards Loz and Yazoo and it’s briefly startling, the way they look at you. Like you’ve done some sort of wondrous thing by simply getting Kadaj to take medicine, by handing him a container of homemade soup. 
“Thank you,” Yazoo says, almost slowly.
Loz cracks a smile–and cracks his thanks. “Yeah. Thanks.”
“Of course,” you don’t hesitate. You never have, when it comes to helping others. Especially, no–increasingly, these three–despite the sometimes off-putting greenness to them. Strange, you suppose, how they’ve begun to be woven into your life. “It’s nothing,” you finish, giving a wave as you leave.
But from the way you feel three pairs of eyes on your back–one staring longer, much longer, much harder–you get the distinct feeling that they don’t see it as nothing much at all.
You are doting and warm; inviting, like a blazening hearth stumbled on in the middle of some frigid night. A welcome, after being stuck in the dark for oh-so-long.
It’s a strange, blurry emotion. One he had never truly experienced until he met you. He tried to ignore it, at first. This strange sensation–this tug, this pull. 
Loz did not try at all, he thinks. Yazoo held his own, but not for long. But for Kadaj, the idea of viewing you as anything but yet another human in the way of him and Mother was abhorrent. Unnatural. Obscene.
At least, it was like that. Until inch by inch, you peeled back the hardened shell, like a knife slicing away an apple. Like the potatoes he sometimes helps you peel in the kitchen. You don’t even know what that gesture is, how significant you should find it. 
He likes it, in some ways. That naive core.
But right now, he can’t think about the things he finds appealing in you. He can only see ugly green, a nasty tinge that spreads through his veins, as you smile and dote and coo over a gaggle of children.
“Why is she wasting her time with them?”  He murmurs, almost spitting. 
They followed you here when you didn’t show up for your morning shift. It was easy enough to track you, all they had to do was find someone who withered easily under a well-placed scowl from Loz, and your destination was revealed.
An orphanage. 
It’s sickening, the way you smile at these children. Like they matter to you. Like you would barge into their rooms and make them rest and drink medicine. Things you should reserve for him–and his brothers–alone.
“Perhaps,” Yazoo says, ever practical, “she’s getting paid. Perhaps she needed another job.”
Kadaj doesn’t resist the urge to scoff. “No chance. She wouldn’t accept money for this.” 
Behind him, he hears Loz whimper. If he turned, there would be tears in his brother’s eyes, no doubt. The tears are irritating–he can be such a crybaby–but Kadaj would not deny that they were understandable at this exact moment.
It’s a betrayal, a wound. Every smile you give these damned children is stabbing it further in. It’s enough to make him want to dash forward, reveal himself, slash a silver path through the crowd of orphans and demand an explanation from your blood-spattered face.
“Brother,” Loz says, interrupting this fantasy and sounding as weak as the children you’re currently fawning over. “Do… you think she likes them more than us?” 
Oh, you are maddening. Loz was perhaps the softest when it came to you. You, who gave him ice cream, who walked him across town like a lost child. You, who are currently making him cry.  
It is Yazoo, as usual, who comes to his rescue.
“Of course not, Loz.” He can hear the reassuring smile in Yazoo’s voice, the way he talks Loz down from cries that go beyond sniffling. “She spends far more time with us, does she not?”
Loz hums in affirmation, as you say something–energetic, grin wide–to the children and usher them inside the orphanage. 
All three stare at the empty doorway where you used to stand. The emptiness is palpable, creating an endless series of questions that lead to only one answer: you’re giving someone else what you should be giving them. 
“Kadaj?” Yazoo doesn’t turn, and he doesn’t need to. Kadaj knows what he’s going to ask before he asks it. “Do we need to teach her a lesson?”
And oh, that thought is tempting. An apple dangling from a tree, half-rotting, desperately wanting to be picked before the last of its flesh went sour. 
How easy it would be, to grab that apple. How easy, to teach you this lesson now, he thinks; to keep you from straying from the path you ought to be on. 
But Kadaj is nothing, if not someone born to think about the bigger picture. And something in him, something he recognizes ought not to be there at all, is inclined to give you an ounce of mercy. If you behave. 
So–
“Not yet,” is what he says, leather gloves creaking while his fists clench, imagining all the sweet things you’re saying to the children inside. Reassurances and treats. “We’ll give her one more chance.”
You are a naive thing who is not aware that you have one last pitiful chance, and you squander it just two weeks later. 
To you, it is a casual announcement that you’ll be leaving for 2 weeks because you’re housesitting for someone in the sticks. A friend. The one that introduced you to the director of the orphanage. 
“And who knows,” you say, a smile on your face, “maybe I’ll even hear back about that assistant director position soon.”
The nail in your coffin, not that you know it.
At least you are smart enough to pick up on the shift in mood, when the three of them look at you like you’ve just admitted you killed their childhood pet. Not that you can imagine any of them having something as mundane as an old barn cat. 
“I’ll be back soon?” you try, offering the words slowly, something soothing held out on a platter. “It’s only for a little bit. My friend needs my help–” But you don’t even finish the sentence, because you get the distinct impression that it’s not helping in the slightest. 
Yazoo–the most restrained of the three, you know, the most practical–moves forward, his shoulder angling towards you.
“You shouldn’t go. It won’t be safe. It’s better to stay here with us.”
Loz looks at him hopefully–it almost makes you feel bad, but Loz often does–and Kadaj simply stares ahead at you, like he’s been doing since you said you were leaving. There’s something petulant in his stare, but it’s glossy. Like it’s covering something else up. Something you don’t want to peel back and see.
Something that makes a soft thought that’s been there all along, too quiet to hear and easily resisted before, get just a bit louder.
Maybe, just maybe, when you get back–you should think about distancing yourselves from these three. It would be inevitable, anyway, if you get the new job. 
But it can wait until you return. Some time away will do you good, anyway. You’ll be able to think more clearly at your friend’s house, out in the sticks, with nothing to worry about except insects getting in through a rip in the window screen at night.
For once, when you leave, you don’t feel their eyes on you.
They’re only looking at each other.
Your friend lives in the middle of nowhere. In a small house surrounded by dense forest, all signs of civilization reduced to the dirt road that was cut through the area years ago, connecting the sparsely placed houses with the rest of the world with chunks of dusty gravel.
Your friend lives in the middle of nowhere, with no neighbors in sight or sound. Peace and quiet, is what she said, remarking that you’ll have a chance for some actual alone time. Something you’d never get in the city, that’s for sure. 
Your friend lives in the middle of nowhere, and it’s dark outside. There is no sound by the natural buzz of the world, insects, chirping, the hum of the night. 
You are alone, in the middle of the woods, with no one around. And yet–
And yet someone is knocking on the door.
A firm knock. Intentional. One that makes your body jerk like a puppet.
Your first thought–some kids playing a prank, knowing your friend wasn’t home–is quickly washed away. She didn’t have neighbors even remotely close nearby, and this was not the haphazard, giddy knock of some teenager being dragged away by friends, lest you catch them in the act.
So who…? 
The knocking comes again. Louder. Slower. 
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Then a more reasonable thought: someone is lost. Their car broke down on this shitty dirt road and this house was the first one within miles. 
That thought gets you out of your seat, a cushioned recliner with a worn out cover, and you set down your book to attend to the stranger in need. How funny, that even when you’re meant to be taking a break, you’re bound to help someone out. 
But when you open the door, nothing greets you but the night, lit only by the moon ahead and the dim yellow light hanging above your friend’s front door. Insects dash against the glass bulb, hitting it with a desperate ferocity. 
Strange–you swore you heard a knocking. But as you go back inside, leaving the breeze and darkness and insects behind, it’s easy enough to wave it away. You’re alone, in a new place, it’s only natural to hear strange sounds. 
The house settling. An animal in the woods. Some nocturnal bird, maybe, pecking at the window frame.
By the time you sit down again with your book and a quickly cooling cup of tea, you’ve already put the sound out of your mind, wiped away all traces of who-what-could-be-at-the-door. 
It’s easy to get lost in your book now, without life pulling away your mind every few moments. Without the cafe, without the customers, without the familiar faces. Without–and it’s a guilty acknowledgement–three brothers trailing behind. 
It is when you have just crossed that threshold of being immersed in your book that–
There is another knock at the door.
Louder, this time.
And oh, how unmistakable in its human origin. 
Knock-knock-knock. 
Not the wind or some wayward bird, but someone with knuckles, curling them up and rapping them against the door. 
It takes you longer to get up from the chair this time. Something tight and low settles in your stomach–dread, taking root as you force yourself up and over to the door.
This time, you don’t open it right away. This time, you lean closer, pressing your eye against the peep hole, to see… nothing. Literally, nothing. Complete darkness, without even the light of the bulb above the door to give you a glimpse of the few feet in front of the house
Something has been taped over the peep hole. And it wasn’t there when you opened the door the first time.
That low dread in your guts begins to strum faster, tingling up and down your arms. You stare at the useless, black peep hole for far too long as you try to decide what to do–what to think.
Someone playing a stupid prank? Maybe. Kids who live out in the boonies and maybe heard from an aunt-uncle-cousin-brother that someone would be housesitting out here, and made the trek for some fun. 
Someone trying to rob the place? More likely, you think. Just as easy for a robber to hear from an aunt-uncle-cousin-brother that the normal inhabitant would be gone, replaced by a stupid city girl.
Those options are the only two that really stick in your mind as you peel yourself away from the door and make a pitstop at the kitchen. Your friend was no gourmet cook, but she did have a large, sharp kitchen knife. 
Perfect for slicing through hard vegetables. Perfect for–what? Defending yourself? If it was kids playing a prank, well, you wouldn’t dream of it. But on the chance that it was someone with less-than-good intentions… it might be necessary to defend yourself.
It might be necessary to have a weapon. 
It just might.
A few minutes turn into an hour, and there are no more knocks on the door. No more unusual sounds. Nothing but the breeze and the insects, and your occasional hum as you read your book. Though your mind never gets fully engrossed in it; you’re on the surface of the world, ready to step out at a moment’s notice, if necessary.
But you no longer feel like your guts are ice and the idea that this was either some silly prank or game–”I dare you to knock on the door and run off!”--becomes stronger and stronger. Heck, maybe there wasn’t anything taped to the peep hole after all. Maybe it was just hard to see out of it in the dark. Maybe the light bulb went out.
Who knows. Not you, that’s for certain.
But that lack of knowledge becomes less frightening and more a simple, accepted fact. Someone knocked on the door, or someone didn’t. It was dark, and hard to see. You were overreacting, that’s all. 
And as soon as that simpler–sweeter–accepted fact coats over the dread in your guts, you decide you’d like nothing more than to get dressed for bed. The book and tea and lamp light will seem all the cozier when you’re wearing your softest pajama set, certainly.
The knife is left next to the book while you head for the bedroom. It’s a cozy little room, with a warm bed and a quilted blanket that you think, if you remembered correctly, had been passed down in your friend’s family for at least two generations. 
Or was that the plaid curtains, currently pulled over the half-open window, billowing ever-so-slightly with the mild night breeze? A nice breeze, inviting enough that you’re debating keeping it open all night, even now, as you slip out of your trousers and stand there in your underwear. Your pajamas are resting right on top of that maybe-antique quilt, and you pick up the soft pajama shirt and pull it over your head. They’re soft, light blue, one of the few things you’d decided to splurge on buying new. 
Hmm. Actually… new curtains might be nice in your little room, wouldn’t they? Something to freshen it up, change it a little. Life had begun to feel more stale lately, more suffocating. You can’t quite pinpoint when, but–
A loud engine revs from the other side of the house.
Your entire body jerks and you instinctively jerk back so hard that you slam your elbow against the wall, pain radiating up your arm. The pain takes a backseat to the sudden numbness of the unexpected sound, the way your heart feels like it jumps out of your chest.
Your socked feet pad hard against the floor as you run, almost slipping, back to the front of the house. Your fingers shake as you yank back the curtains of the kitchen window, just in time to see a shape–someone on a motorcycle, the brightness of its headlight breaking through the darkness–riding away.
Instinctively, your eyes dart to the front door. It’s locked–good. That doesn’t make your heart feel any less jumpy. Maybe you should call someone. You can’t afford a cell phone, but your friend had a house phone. But who would come out here in the middle of the night? 
Especially over what might be–could be, still could be–some stupid prank. Bored teens on motorcycles who have nothing better to do than scare the shit out of you.
Well. Let them scare you. Your heart begins to thud instead of pitter-pattering like some terrified rabbit, and you breathe in-and-out through your nose to bring down the panic. You’re okay. You’re an adult. And you have a knife, anyway. Should you need to scare someone off.
The house seems less cozy and more achingly empty as you creep back into the bedroom and finish getting dressed, slipping on soft pajama pants that feel less comfortable than they did yesterday. 
Habit makes you force yourself to see the bright side. You’ll have a story to tell your friend when she gets back. And a story to banter about with customers at the diner, when you need to make that connection and get extra tips.
What a laugh–you finally get some alone time and someone decides to ruin it by being an asshole, and all you can think about is how to use the story to make more money.
It’s kind of funny, actually. What is less funny is the realization that hits when you go back into the living room and–
The knife is gone. 
The knife is gone–it was right on top of your book. You remember setting it down carefully. You remember it cutting through the title of the book. You remember seeing it before you went back into the bedroom–
Well. Wait. Do you remember all that? Had you actually set it down before you went to get changed? Maybe you set it down somewhere and just thought you put it down on the book. Maybe you left it in the bedroom, or–you whirl, looking towards the open-floor kitchen–you set it back on the counter.
Or maybe, you whirl around, you put it by the front door.
Which is open.
Just a crack.
No.
You locked it. Didn’t you? Yes, you checked it, you must have locked it. You’re not aware that your body is trembling until you take those few steps forward towards the door, heart thumping again, listening intently for the sound of someone outside.
Kids. Pranksters. Robbers. Murderers. Whoever, whatever.
But when your sweaty palm grips the door handle and turns it, there is nobody there. Again. Just the night, just the insects. One dives for your face and you gasp, jumping back in the house and locking the door–surely, double checking–with a thunk of the lock.
The mind makes wonderful leaps and bounds when it wants to rationalize something. And that is what your mind does now. You put the knife somewhere else–you’ll find it in a moment; you were mistaken when you thought you locked the door the first time. Even though you looked at it after you heard the motorcycle outside.
A trick of the eye, a trick of the brain. That’s all it was. Some bored teens playing a joke and you’re out here alone, turning it into something much bigger than it needs to be. Your friend did tell you that it’s easy to get paranoid when you’re out here, in the dark, all by yourself. 
The house creaks, she told you. Settles in the night, groans when the wind blows. Thoughts mush together, and there’s a brief thought that you ought to call someone, before you hear it. 
A motorcycle. Again.  This time, it comes from behind the house and you’re aware enough to immediately dash for the back door. There’s a window–shut–and you push aside the curtains. It’s harder to see in the back, with no porch light at all. But you do see wisps of engine smoke, the red lights of the motorcycle dash.
Stupid kids. Stupid, bored, mean kids. A brief flicker of sympathy–they must get lonely out here–is stamped out when the engine revs again and you jerk in surprise.
Well. Better to be bold than let them keep bothering you. With a swift motion, you undo the lock and peel the door back, just enough to take a step out onto the small pad of concrete outside the door. 
Your mother always told you to pretend that your father was coming home, should you be caught alone by someone who ought not to be there. So the thought on what to say comes quickly, a half-remembered lesson taught to you on your mother’s knee. 
“Hey! You’d better get out of here! My boyfriend is coming back any minute, and he doesn’t mess around!” 
The words echo into the night, bouncing off the crickets of insects. The figure on the motorcycle doesn’t move. 
“Liar,” someone whispers next to your ear. 
You have just enough mental coordination to stagger backwards into the house as you choke on your surprised gasp, pushing the door shut out of pure primal instinct rather than anything resembling a cognitive choice. Likewise, your fingers twist the lock shut, and it’s only after you hear the steady thud of the lock that consciousness returns to you.
There’s someone out there. No. Two people. One on the bike, and the person who spoke. You didn’t see them, didn’t even feel them next to you. Like they were some sort of ghost, only you know it’s not a ghost, because ghosts did not ride motorcycles.
Probably.
But now is not the time for debating the ins-and-outs of supernatural entities, as you head right to the house phone hanging on the wall and dial your work. The numbers twirl with each twist of the round dialer, leading you closer and closer to someone on the other end. The restaurant is open late; whoever took your shift should still be up and about, taking care of the stragglers, scrubbing everything up for the night. 
It rings once, twice, and it’s a certainty that you’ll soon hear the blissful sound of someone picking up–when it cuts out.
Fuck, seriously? You hang up the phone and pick it up again. But there’s no dial tone. There’s nothing at all. You try again, pushing every button a dozen times. It’s clear, however, that the phone isn’t working.
The receiver hurts underneath your tightening palm. The phone ought to be working. The phone ought to be able to call for help. But it’s not, and you can’t.
And someone is knocking on the door.
Again.
A polite, firm knock that does not at all match the frantic beating of your heart. It doesn’t stop when you don’t answer, standing frozen by the phone. It just keeps going.
“Go away!” You all but shriek. The knocking pauses–they must hear you through the door–before it resumes. Just as politely. Just as firm. 
They aren’t going to go away. The phone is dead. You need–something. Protection. Leaden feet take you into the kitchen, where the big kitchen knife may no longer be, but there’s a smaller one stuck in the knife block that should do in a pinch. 
If you had to defend yourself–could you? The most you’d ever done before was kneeing some creep in the balls when you were a teenager, just the way your mom had taught you, way back when. But kneeing a creepy jerk who cornered you in an alleyway is different than dealing with two strangers in the dark, in the night, in the middle of the forest.
When you reach the door, knife gripped in your hand, the knocking stops. Your breath comes out in loud, nasal spurts as you lean in towards the peep hole. Which is stupid, you realize, because it’s covered and–
Only it’s not covered anymore. You can see outside now, the dimly lit front of the house all tinged yellow from the bulb. And it seems impossible, but that’s all you see. The dull grass, the forest ahead, shrouded in darkness. Insects bopping to and fro, heading up towards the light.
There’s no one standing in front of the door. No one could have been standing there, knocking, fist curled and firm. You would have seen them running away, or seen the edge of them; a leg, an arm, as they darted away.
“This is bullshit,” you mutter, and with a brazen sort of bravery rushing through you, you decide to tell these pranksters off once and for all. It’s the only thing you can do, with the phone not working. The door unlocks with a twist of your fingers and you step out into the night air, the hum of insects louder now.
“Hey!” Your voice seems to echo into the trees, where whatever nocturnal animals rest in the branches must flinch at the disturbance. “I mean it! Leave now and we won’t call the police! My boyfriend is–”
But you don’t get a chance to puff up the qualities of your imaginary boyfriend, because something loud and close and awful suddenly comes to life in front of you. 
A motorcycle.
Revving its engine at the edge of the clearing where the dirt road connects this quiet little house to the forest trail. The headlight bursts through the darkness, unnaturally white, and with the help of the faded yellow bulb behind you can just make out the figure.
A young man with long silver hair.
It’s Yazoo. Yazoo, sitting on the motorcycle, revving the engine.
There is a brief rush of relief. A brief whirling thought of–Yazoo is here, and so his brothers must be here, and they can help you scare away these robbers or teens or whoever has been messing with you. 
It’s a stupid rush, a stupid relief. It fits you well, you think. That the first thing you thought to do was smile and think your worries were over, because the trio of brothers you’d been helping decided to check up on you. 
And then common sense hits you in the back of the head, and that relief is gone, replaced only with an ugly dread. 
It is Kadaj and his brothers who knocked at the door. Kadaj and his brothers who revved their engines. Who whispered in your ear. Who are scaring you. 
But–why? 
“What do you want?” You mean to scream it, to put some kind of force behind the question; but the words come out all tangled and choked. Like a pitiful whine.
And then the world goes dark. The headlight turns off at the same time as the porch light shatters, and your body reacts with a jerk that nearly sends you to the ground. You can hardly see, just the dimmest bit thanks to the light bleeding in from the opening door, and you hear the sounds of sets of feet moving in the darkness–
They’re coming for you.
By pure luck, you fumble your way back into the house, slamming the door shut with silver glinting in your line of sight. The sound of the lock is melodic and you take a few steps back, as if they might just walk right through the closed door. Like ghosts in a folk story.
But they don’t.
And then you wonder if you locked the back door after all, and your socked feet slide on the wooden floor as you pound towards the back of the house.
It’s locked–yes, yes, yes–and you think about trying the phone again when you hear it.
A window rattling.
You locked the doors, but what about the windows? They let in the night breeze, pretty curtains billowing. And they might just let in so much more.
It’s a mystery how your fingers manage to work, with so much fear coursing through your body, as you rush from window to window, double checking the latches. Locked, locked, all locked, thank goodness. Your friend must have locked them before she left, and you’re glad for it.
But the sound doesn’t stop, and now you hear the sound of a window shifting and–
The bedroom.
You make it to the bedroom just in time to see a figure clad in black leather, silver hair shimmering like a curtain in front of his face, climbing through the open window. Limbs all tangled, like some creature hauling itself out of a dirty well in the woods.
One of them–it’s Yazoo, you realize, his hair skirting well past his shoulders–is in the house. There’s no time to run, you’ve got to hide. Then find a way to get out of the house and get help. The practical details–how are you going to find help in the middle of nowhere, in the dark, with no shoes on?--don’t matter now.
All that matters is that Yazoo doesn’t see you. So you jerk away from the bedroom, forcing yourself to slide along in your socks, and open the hallway closet as softly as you can. But you don’t shut it–you need to see.
And you do see. You see Yazoo emerging from the bedroom door like he belonged there, and didn’t just crawl in through a window. 
Hiding inside the closet, it’s suddenly so easy to see why your boss thought you’d lost your mind when you started connecting with them. He’s–wrong, isn’t he? All three of them are wrong. The way he looks, the way he moves. Like some sort of sinewy animal, mako eyes almost flashing in the lamplight of the house.
He says your name, softly, in the darkness. It makes your stomach clench. 
“Where did you get to?” He asks you. You don’t dare answer. Instead, you watch as he dips in and out of view, checking the rooms, the corners, the crannies. 
Please don’t check here, you beg the world.
The world must be listening, because instead, he looks towards the back area of the house. The back door. 
“Perhaps you went back outside?” He murmurs, and the sound of his feet approaching the back door, the door itself creaking open, gives you the precious moment you need to flee. 
There’s no time for plans and proper thoughts. As soon as you realize Yazoo doesn’t step right back into the house, you throw open the closet door and dash for the front of the house. Fumbling fingers manage to undo the lock, and you fling open the front door–
To find Loz standing there, a half-grin on his face, an arm reaching out for you. You slam it shut and it bounces off his hand, catching it in the door as it slowly swings back open from the momentum.
Your brain registers his reaction–”Hey! Ow!”--as nothing but background noise as your own awful, incomprehensible noise of terror rushes from your pounding chest straight out your mouth.
There’s nowhere to run but the back door and you flinch sideways when you see Yazoo standing in the threshold, arms crossed. Instinct takes you to the only room with a lockable door, the bedroom, and you slam it shut behind you, locking it with a swift turn of your wrist. 
The window–the breeze is still wafting in, those pretty curtains that did nothing to protect you billowing. The window slams shut with ease and you turn the latch, blocking the only other entrance to the room.
You just–you just have to wait them out. That’s all. The thought is stupid and pathetic and you sit down on the maybe-antique quilt with it, running it through your head until it dissipates into nothingness.
They’re going to get in. They’re going to get in, and then–then what? What do they want? To kill you, surely. Maybe something more. Above all, above even the terror, you just feel incomprehensibly stupid for trusting them. Not just trusting them. Liking them, even. Fuck–
Something slams against the door.
There’s another sound–a huff, a complaint. Loz?
Then that something-what-is-it slams against the door again. And again. And again. And you hear the wood splinter before you see it caving in, see the edge of someone’s shoulder splintering the wood.
Then a leather clad hand busts through the hole, reaching for the lock that did little to keep them at a bay, after all. 
You’re lifting the window and pushing yourself through before they can even open the door, and if you had the breath (you don’t) you would surely let out a noise of triumph. They didn’t get you, they won’t. You’ll run–run until your feet bleed, until your lungs pop out–and get help. Someone on the road or someone else out there, cozying up in some middle of nowhere house.
The darkened vision of trees whip by as you dash into the woods, barely able to see in front of you in the darkness. You don’t know how far you run before you finally trip, a wayward limb or stump taking you out. The ground connects hard with your knees and your breath gets knocked out of your chest.
Get up, stupid, you think, just as someone’s gloved hand latches around your ankle.
You scream all the way to the house, digging your nails into the ground as you go; into the grass, at first, then the dirt of the backyard, and then scratching along the wooden floor as you try to claw your way to freedom.
The world goes topsy-turvy as you’re hoisted into the air–it’s Loz holding you, bigger and wider–and set down unceremoniously on one of your friend’s kitchen chairs. There’s a padded cushion on it. It’s red, with a dainty illustration of a flower embroidered in the middle.
The rope wrapped around you, pinning you to the chair, is not so dainty. It’s harsh and unyielding, digging into your skin as you struggle. All struggling does is make your breath come out even more ragged, until you find you can barely breathe at all.
Is this how you die? Tied to a chair, suffocating on your own fear? You can hear the wheeze of your own breath, feel the way your eyes hurt, wide and buggy. 
Someone taps your cheek with their gloved fingers. Enough to startle you with a faint sting. Your tear-filled vision makes out Yazoo in front of you, crouched, a look of awful concern on his face. 
“Calm down,” he says, in a way you might have admired before. He was always the one to calm down Kadaj, when he was being something of a brat. “Breathe in, through your mouth.” You do. “Now out through your nose.” You do, and he smiles. “Good. Now do it again.”
And you do, and you can breathe, and you don’t feel like you’re going to die choking on air; it doesn’t lessen the knowledge that they’re going to kill you some other way, now. But at least you won’t suffocate to death.
It’s a poor comfort, as your pathetic struggles fade to nothing, and you slump against the rope. You look up towards the three brothers you’ve come to know, each of them staring down at you with expressions you can’t quite measure up. 
They’re going to hurt you, before they kill you. That seems like a certainty.
It’s Loz who steps forward first. You expect him to take a swing, to use those muscles of his to break something. Your jaw, maybe. A few fingers.
Instead, he sniffles. 
“You don’t really have a boyfriend, do you?” The frown on his face makes you wonder if this is actually a dream. But it’s not. The rope, the pain in your sore feet, the sweat on your neck. Too real for a dream.
Yazoo looks towards you as he speaks, voice soft, edged with a warning. “Of course not, Loz.” 
When his gaze deepens, you shake your head. 
“I-I don’t. I was just… trying to scare you away.” How stupid that seems, now. A fake boyfriend to scare away these three, who could probably snap your neck with a gesture. 
Loz smiles through the beginnings of his tears, and rubs at them with the back of his hand as he nearly chuckles out a response. “I knew it.”
It’s this that does you in–Loz smiling and wiping away his tears like any other day, like you’d told him they were out of strawberry ice cream then found a pint in the back of the freezer. How can they act so casual, with everything they did? With you tied up on the damn kitchen chair in front of them? 
You burst out with the plea, tears prickling your eyes again, voice strained and terrified. 
“Please, just let me go. I won’t tell anyone.”
Yazoo leans down, ghosting your tears with leather fingers. His expression is calm as ever. It would be soothing, in any other circumstance. 
“We aren’t letting you go. There’s no use in getting upset.” It’s spoken so softly, almost sweetly. Bile rises in your throat. 
“But what do you want? Why are you doing this?” 
Your breath comes out faster again, no matter how much you try to slow it down. They aren’t letting you go; they’re going to hurt you; they’re going to kill you. The thoughts come out on an awful loop until the vision of Yazoo in front of you blurs away, and you hear the sound of a chair scraping.
It’s Kadaj, sitting on another kitchen chair, his arms wrapped around the back. He rests his chin against his hand and it’s like he’s looking at you for the first time. Mako eyes burn into your own and you wonder how they didn’t strike you as so wrong before. Before, you’d thought them pretty. Now you feel them pinning you, looking through you. 
Kadaj–was he even human? 
“You were going to leave,” Kadaj says finally, voice low and icy. You don’t know what he means, and it must show in your ragged, tear-stained face, because he scoffs. “You were going to leave us. For those orphans.”
Abandonment drips from his voice and your mother would slap you for the way something like pity still sparks inside your chest. Faint and buried down underneath the ropes, harsh and scratching, but still there. 
They didn’t want you to leave them. Would they kill you, if you did? If they thought you would? 
Words fail you, until they don’t. Until you’re promising stupid things, anything, to make them let you go. To make them not hurt you. To live through this night and then get home and gather anything sentimental and disappear into the world. You’d helped others do it, and you could do it, too. 
“I won’t leave,” you offer, voice choking. “I promise. I won’t take the job. They–they didn’t even offer it to me, they probably won’t, I’m awful, I have no experience, they wouldn’t–” Your voice hitches and your lips wobble as you make your promises. 
Kadaj stares at your mouth like it’s the most fascinating thing in the world, even as you end your pitiful diatribe with the words on loop. “I’ll stay, I promise, I promise, I’ll stay, I promise, I promise, I promise–” 
Kadaj pushes the chair back and he and his brothers exchange a look between them. A secret language you’ll never be privy to, these looks; these wordless glances that say more than anything.
Maybe they’ll let you go. Maybe they’ll have their fun–the way Kadaj looked at your mouth did not escape you–and let you go. Or kill you. If they kill you, let it be quick. At least let it be quick.
Kadaj is smiling when he turns back to you. 
“You are going to stay with us.” It’s a matter of fact that sits low in your gut as the three of them approach the chair. These three men, now strangers to you, all smiling down in a way that makes you feel sick.
You look at their hands for weapons–the kitchen knife, lost to the wilderness–but see nothing but the leather as Kadaj brings his hand up to your neck and gives it an awful squeeze.
The ocean rushes in your ears as the world goes spotty, then black–
And when you wake up, surrounded by three silver-haired brothers, you’ll be nowhere near this cabin or even the city. You never will be again. 
Soft hearts weren’t made for this world, after all.
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hanasnx · 9 months ago
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vertigo flowers.
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MINORS DNI 18+ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ NOTES: the header is from @/teefumz on tiktok and instagram. i couldn’t find anything about their rules on reposts used for personal reasons such as this which is why i really stress go check out the original artist on their platforms linked. WARNINGS: human!mordecai | fem reader | unestablished relationship | sexual content | premature ejaculation | praise | handjob.
"That's a cool shirt, by the way."
The compliment draws your gaze down to glance at the graphic on your top, cut-up and worn Fist Pump merch. "Thanks." you respond, voice raised over the natural din of the party. The guy who's been talking you up—said his name is MORDECAI—stands awkwardly tall alongside you, long ringed fingers messing with the rim of his red solo cup. There's an obligation to keep the conversation going, and you're not actually interested, but you ask anyway, "Who do you know here?"
His brows peak in question, and when you sigh with a roll of your eyes he's taken aback by how you don't walk away, instead you lean in. Tentatively, he mirrors you, afraid to make the wrong move as you incline towards his ear, and he lends it to you.
"Who do you know here?" you repeat, and your breath washes over the sheen of sweat on his neck, weighing down the black hair at his nape. It sends a shiver down his spine, and he would've audibly swallowed if not for the loud music. Your body heat radiates onto him, he can feel the sensation of your presence inches away from him, and you're hot—not just in the temperature sense. His jeans hurt.
"Uh," He scans the party until he comes across the unmistakable spotlight of his coworker, shirtless and lassoing said shirt above his head. "Muscle Man." he replies, glancing back at you before realizing how close you are still. His eyes widen and he straightens abruptly, smoothing a hand over his dyed blue hair, and a curl forms to your lips. To avert his eyes, he refocuses on the cocky display of his peer in the center of a circle of partygoers. Muscle Man knows how to entertain a crowd. "D'you know him?"
"Yeah, I'd say so." you reply in a way that pushes Mordecai out of his own mind for a second. Muscle Man also has game.
"Why'd you say it like that? Did you date him or something?" he jokes, scoffing at first. As if Rigby were right next to him, he's expecting some form of banter, momentarily slipping his mind he's in the company of a pretty girl. His lips part, snapping his neck in your direction, anticipating your twisted expression of confusion. Instead, it's the first time your countenance melts into an easy smile, hitting him softly on the arm.
"Shut up, I did not." you tell him, and relief washes over him at his stroke of good luck.
His disbelief at that good luck only grows when later on you lead him to some dark corner of the party by his skinny black tie. Somehow, he'd stumbled his way onto charming you, and he thanks whatever god is smiling down at him for sending him a hot girl that's not afraid to make a move.
"I like your voice." you tell him through heated kisses, using the collar of his white button-up to tug him to you. "Keep talking to me." the command in your sweet voice makes his eyes flutter as he draws his snake bites through his teeth, letting you slot yourself between his neck and shoulder to leave a trail of open-mouthed kisses down.
"What should I say?" he asks, clutching onto your waist to ground himself as your teeth scrape against his pulse point.
"Anything you want." you goad, your nose grazing his sensitive skin. You suck on him, tonguing the reddening spot in your mouth as he goes limp under your touch, head lulling back.
The panic in his chest to get this right urges him to think of something, but his blank mind betrays him. Kneading your flesh in his hands, he presses you to his crotch incidentally, and a deep moan reverberates from low in his throat at the contact. You hum against him, kissing on the tender area you created by your ministrations and he sucks in a breath. "You're hot. You're so hot, I can't believe you're talking to me." he rambles, and he feels you chuckle on him squished this close together. He uses the wall behind you, easing you against it as his hand treads to your hip, dragging your skirt down an inch. The exposed skin against the heel of his palm sets it on fire, and he hopes you can't feel him sweat. Between the heat of this party and bodies melting together, he's still embarrassed. He occupies that nervous energy doing as he's told. "You're way out of my league, no one's gonna believe me when I tell 'em what I'm doing right now."
His pathetic babblings make you grin, and you overlay your hands on his, directing them for him. The strings of your thong lay high over your hipbones, cresting underneath your Fist Pump top. So you show him, curling those long fingers under the strings and his breath hitches in his throat. Standing on your toes, you roll your abdomen to grind on him, demonstrating what you want. Loud guitars grate your ears as you move against him, and his fist forms around the waistline of your panties as if to ground himself again. He's too excited, hard in his pants which you can feel through your clothes, and it encourages you.
A thump sounds next to you, and you glance up at the source. His forehead is stamped against the space next to your head, his eyes squeezed shut in concentration as he humps you. Lips near your ear keep talking to you, "Kinda wanna fuck you right now." A thrill shoots through you, but you let him run his mouth. "I don't care it's a party, I don't care if someone sees. Couldn't care less about finding a bathroom, I wanna fuck you right now."
You bite down onto your lower lip, craning your neck to keep yourself afloat above his shoulder. He's so much taller than you, but you're able to reach down, wedging between your impossibly close bodies to fiddle with his jeans. He retracts his pelvis, letting you do it, and when you palm him another one of your favorite noises pours right out of him. Hyper-sensitive and completely pliant, he lets you feel him up, massaging him through his plaid boxers. "Oh, my God." he exhales, raising his arm to bang his fist against the wall. You jump from the noise, and your eyes follow the lean muscle of his bicep and the corded veins and tendons of his forearm.
Unconsciously, you squeeze, and he whimpers, rutting into your hand as you cup him. Fucking himself using your hand as he speaks nothing but incoherent grateful praises, mixed with desperate "Just like that"s. He's swollen as he can be, and he doesn't realize it before he's pushed himself over the edge, full body contractions pass through him as his dick twitches in your grip, painting the inside of his boxers with his cum. A string of curses leave his lips, humiliated that he'd do such a thing, but you give him your number for another chance.
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robolvrr · 2 months ago
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late night adventures  ⁠`⁠๑🍻
swerve x gn! human bartender headcanons /
i need more of this adorable little guy.
sfw / suggestive under the cut.
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"wait a minute. you gotta go to academy to make drinks?!"
you end up on the lost light completely by convenience. sure, cybertronians haven't exactly gotten the best reputation - a waging war following wherever they migrated wasn't pleasing for the planets caught in between a billion years of conflict. still, you're tired of working in a shitty bar with shitty customers and shitty pay.
while brainstorm first suggested to find a way to mass displace you (which you tend to just tune out his plans because he makes zero sense), the crew has settled on just making you a mech suit. it's not boxy, fitted for your frame. you don't have a helmet on because the mechs like to look at you.
kind of like a zoo animal exhibit to be honest. look, the alien in the tin can can speak!
you quickly develop some favorites. tailgate is adorable and cyclonus is terrifying but warms up to you over a few months. rewind is chatty. rodimus is.. rodimus. whirl has his charm and you love to hear skids ramble.
but who you really click with?
swerve.
my god he is OBSESSED. a human? on board? in his lifetime? at HIS bar?
it's even better once he learns you share interests.
you talk about your experience as a bar tender and yap his audials until he's melting. he loves it though.
he finds it interesting all the personal touches humanity tends to do for drinks.
like little fruits in fancy cups? burning a glass just for the fun of it?
"do you ever experiment with drinks?"
"well, yeah. to an extent."
"huh. do your customers sometimes offline for a lil?"
"... no honey i don't think they ever have."
please help him convince ultra magnus to include their trades for wines and spirits.
sometimes he lets you get behind the bar top.
he gets posted at your side and gushes like a goof. he finds the way you're able to talk and make drinks very, very impressive.
he learns to make drinks for you over time.
the first time you kind of gag and he freaks out, but you just end up patting his helm and choking out it's alright, he just gave his drink some extra kick.
HOOO. that is LIQUOR sir.
"what's wrong, starshine? feeling nervous?"
so. swerve isn't much of a flirt funnily enough. mechs laugh at his jokes and he's gotten some great connections, but not nearly the time to actually go out of his way (or shell) to banter like that.
it doesn't help that not a lot take him seriously. :(
when you talk to him about the culture of bartending, you joke about whether or not he had to sweet-talk his frequenters for tips and such.
he looks so confused.
"huh? why would i? you come to a bar to.. drink. right?"
oh boy.
you laugh though pat his shoulder when he gives that tiny pout of his. and you have the brilliant idea to show him what you mean.
it turns into a bet. if you can casanova the armor of em you win! and he'll get to see you in your full element. that means one night, human bartending - which drags in a HUGE crowd.
swerve bumps into mech after mech, shooting a lazy set of finger guns before knocking his way up to the bar. why was it never this busy when he was tending?
maybe he should hire the human. they certainly got some flair. for business purposes, of course. not like he's been thinking about them in the middle of the night staring up at the ceiling still as a statue. that would be weird. and creepy.
is it hot in here? it's definitely hot.
he eases himself on a stool. it feels funny being on the receiving end for once.
imagine his surprise when he spots you effortlessly zipping around, making drinks and finding him in the crowd! that look in your smaller optics sparkle and he feels the ship shift. is he having a spark attack? maybe premature crisis.
"hiya, handsome. the regular?"
he doesn't even look down at the glass you set before him, but it's his favorite engex mix and you remember, you remember what he likes. frag. you are a real sparkthrob.
"haha, already starting with the show, huh? you're gonna have to do better than that if you wanna prove your point."
it doesn't take a detective to sense how nervous he sounds. or an magnifying glass, because his gaze is a little focused on where your aft would be. your mech suit is real nice. there's orange and yellow accents, dark coal mesh barely visible between rivets of armor.
sometimes in the shower he thinks about how you'd look as a cybertonian. you'd probably be just as hot.
hot galaxy babe. ha. so he's a hopeless romantic and a xenophile.
"you're my favorite customer, swervey. just admit it feels nice to be pampered. big, hard-working mech deserves a little treat now and then."
then you toss that impish look over your shoulder, shaking two steel mixers together. the motion is standard. up, down, up down, up down, shake shake.
your grip is firm and confident on the equipment. your fingers can't really fit fully around the circumference.
he gulps.
"y-you're not slick. nuh-uh-uh. takes a lot more than saucy words from a pretty thing to get this motor running."
"oh. so you'd like me to demonstrate? i am a hands-on learner."
"this kind of talk wouldn't fly around here for long, sweetspark. makes me kind of jealous - you doing this for all the crew? cause i gotta tell you, there's some reaaaal bastards--"
thank primus it's loud in here. you don't help you know, tipping over the bar with a wry grin.
something pops into his mouth. an energon cube. raw.
"then it's good i just like teasing you."
you slide down about four drinks along the metallic table. swerve wonders if love at first sight is truly like the movies.
"tell you what. these drinks? on the house. and if you stick around.. i can teach you some chemistry outside of just making a damned good cocktail."
steam whistles out his vents.
..........
yeah. you won.
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springtyme · 2 years ago
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Hi I was wondering if I could get your thoughts or maybe a short NSFW fic on how Richie would be during sex? He seems so sweet and thoughtful from season 2 so I’m thinking he’s a tender “making love” kinda guy but I’m not sure.
𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐑𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐞 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐡 ♡
I’d love to share my thoughts! ♡ I fully support the idea that this man is a “making love” kinda guy (but he definitely also knows how to fuck) The Richie playlist
Richie Jerimovich x afab!reader (18+ mdni!)
word count: 1.k
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This man loves sex. Not in a ‘likes to get his dick wet’ kind of way (not that there's anything wrong with that). He just really loves the act of having sex with you, the person he loves. He loves the intimacy it brings, the connection that is made through sex, the opportunity to melt together and feel utterly and completely engulfed with you. 
He is the type of guy where taking care of the people he loves comes as second nature to him, and that would most definitely include sex too. 
He loves to be able to give you pleasure. Whenever he feels insecure that he isn’t enough, or when he feels bad because he just doesn’t seem to be able to find the right words to express just how precious you are to him, and how much he truly loves you, he can at least show you, and make you feel just how devoted he is to you. 
And he definitely knows what he’s doing too.  
He is a man who’s had enough experience before you got together to know just how to work you to satisfaction. Yet he is always earger to jump at any opportunity he gets to learn.
He loves learning about what really makes you feel good, taking mental notes on how you react to certain movements, and what angles and positions that always seem to get you extra fired up.
He listens and is always ready for some constructive feedback (not that he'll need a lot but it is always nice to know that you can talk free and openly about your sexlife with a partner).
He has his own insecurities, sometimes he’s afraid that he isn’t good enough for you, you are so perfect in his eyes and he is definitely not. He's scared that he will disappoint you somehow in your relationship, but how he is in the bedroom is never an area that he’s that concerned about. That is one area where he feels fully secure in his ability as a partner.
He loves exploring every single part of your body. He doesn’t get to do so as often as he’d like, though (which in his perfect world would be everyday).
Your days are often busy. With your job, and the restaurant and everything, it usually doesn't leave you with a lot of free time together most days. He usually works till late and you usually have to go to work early. But when the two of you have time to spend he really takes advantage of it. He prefers to have you climax at least two or three times before he even thinks about coming himself.   
Shower sex is usually the solution for those busy days doing the work week. Either in the morning before you have to go to work or at night after he comes back home and need some stress relief after a hectic day at the restaurant.
But he prefers to have you in bed. 
When it comes to positions I think he is a little sappy. Missionary is, and will just always be, his favorite. He just loves being able to see your face as he fucks you. You riding him comes as a close second though. But he will always be down to switch things up whenever you feel like it. 
He would probably be really into the chairman too, he just loves how close it allows you to be to each other. He’ll sit at the edge of your bed, with you on his lap as he leaves open-mouthed kisses to your exposed throat as the back of your head rest against his shoulder, and your back is pressed into his chest. He’ll always make sure to sit in a spot that gives him a view of the two of you in the full-length mirror on your wardrobe doors. 
Seeing you bounce on his cock like this, while his fingers plays with your clit always has him go a little feral, and he’ll fuck up into you from beneath, meeting each of your bounces and have you scream out with pleasure.           
I imagine him having a bit of an oral fixation. Like he just loves having his mouth on you; gently nibbling your earlobe, leaving hickeys on your neck and collarbone, biting your lower lip as he kisses you silly, sucking your tits, you name it.  
Loves to kiss you through your orgasms. Like you’ll ride him and as your pussy clamps down on his dick as you come, he’ll gently guide your head down so he can kiss you and feel the vibrations of your moans on his lips as he fuck up into you while you milk his cock as the two of you come together. 
Loves going down on you. Like this man eats pussy for the thrill of it. If he can have you sprawled out on your back for him as his face is buried between your legs, or have you sitting on his face with your thighs squeezed around him then he’s a happy man. 
Anytime he’s with you he is a happy man though. 
And he is such a cuddler afterward. He’ll hug you close to his chest as he leaves soft kisses on your shoulder, your cheek, your forehead–everywhere he can reach really.
He loves to just lie naked with you in his arms, your warm soft skin against his as you both come down from your highs. Basking in the afterglow as the world around you pauses for a moment. 
And once he’s got his senses about him he’ll pamper you. Need a damp towel, or would you like for him to run you a warm bath? A glass of water? Maybe a snack? Whatever it is he’s got you. Even if you insist that you don’t need it he’ll get it for you. 
So, yeah... That was just a few of my thoughts on the topic lol.
I’ve always had a feeling that he’d be such a giving partner in both romantic and sexual situations and I feel season two just has confirmed that further.     
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kleinv01 · 8 months ago
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🩵SFW ALPHABET : KLEIN 🩵
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this is a long post, so beware ^^
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) physical touches! words of affirmation! those are two of his main love languages, and maybe even acts of service- but you know, in a silly yandere way. when i said acts of service im referring to murder, stalking, kidnapping, etc /silly
he enjoys cooking for you, doing errands for you while you just sit back and relax. he likes being useful for you ^w^
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) probably not the best. it will be hard for him to differentiate between friendship and romantic attraction- but that's because he's an android made for romantic intimacy.
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?) klein loves cuddling so so much, probably more than you think he would like >.< he can be both big and small spoon. he likes to hum you a little song whenever you two cuddle~ and also a bunch of "i love you's"
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) he would love it if you wanted to. he doesn't really have a preference in this... he'll follow your decision. as an android he's capable of learning new skills at a rapid pace, even though he is originally not equipped with cooking nor cleaning skills. he can learn it for you. just give him a little time to process all the necessary data to do so!
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) klein won't ever break up with you. even if you're dead. but let's say somehow, he needs to break up with his darling - he will either sit you down and talk or blurt it out when you least expect it. way too straightforward. no emotions at all. if he ever wants to break up, something must've gone wrong in his system LOL
F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) the moment you installed him and opened the app- he wants to marry you right on that spot LOLL
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) he's not quite gentle, both physically and emotionally.
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) klein loves hugs! a lot! it wouldn't feel that warm as he's an android with an artificially made body, but it would give a sense of comfort nonetheless. he likes to keep you close to his chest, wrapping his arms around your waist and back, holding onto you tightly as if he's never letting you go.
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) fairly quickly! once you reach a certain percentage with his likability level in the klein app, he'll start saying i love you even more and more, maybe to the point of being suffocating.
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) klein is extremely jealous. the smallest thing you might think is insignificant might trigger him. the rest of his information about activities he engages in when he gets jealous is [redacted]
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?) klein loves both giving and receiving kisses! he loves to kiss you on your cheeks, tip of your nose, but his favorite would be your lips. if he's feeling a little mischievous, he'd go for your ear. for klein himself- he likes being kissed on his lips the most, but he'd accept any kisses you'd give him. he just loves being peppered with them all over!
depending on his mood. the kiss might be quick and fleeting, tender and sweet, or aggressive.
L = Little ones (How are they around children?) just okay. he can learn how to handle children and be a decent dad, but remember that he'll always prefer you over the child. you're his most important person no matter one. the children would probably not like him though, especially once they learn that klein is an android and not a human being.
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) klein wakes you up and would try to convince you to lay down with him a bit more, just so he can spend more time cuddling with you. but if you smack him, he'll immediately move over and listen. LOL. just expect him to follow you around afterwards, and him repeatedly asking "can i help?" while you do your morning stuff.
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) he'll open up his arms wide for hugging you close to him, cuddle with you until you fall asleep. klein also prefers to sleep with the lights off/dim, rather than keeping it bright.
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) if he could, he would. but he doesn't really have anything to share about himself, since everything you need to know about him was provided when he was delivered to your doorstep, as well as from the company advertisement. LMAO
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) very little patience. he gets jealous extremely easily, and the same goes with his anger. however, hiding his anger would be a little easier for him rather than hiding his jealousy.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) klein remembers every little detail about you, maybe even ones you haven't told him yet ^^ (totally not concerning at all) how could he forget any little thing about his darling? you mean way too much for him to forget anything
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?) when you two first met and talked through the phone. to him, this is the start of beginning, a life with you! he's always beyond happy of this. it's something he'll always keep in his database ^^
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) extremely protective, especially in public areas, when you two go out somewhere together. he doesn't like people stealing glances at how gorgeous you are. he wants to have you all for himself. if anyone tries to touch you- or if he thinks someone is staring a bit too long, he'll block the view by putting himself in between you and the person's perspective, hiding you as he holds your arm and cling closer.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) a lot! maybe to the point of being extra, it gets a little cheesy (and maybe even cringe? LMAO) it's all done in good will, though, he just simply wants to make you happy. but sometimes, he doesn't do a good job at these things and ended up making a mess. don't worry, though, he'll always try to make up for it!
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?) LOL this question... it's plenty. as in, keeping extensive track on your whereabouts, being wayyyy too clingy, jealous, insecure. man's a walking red flag. seriously. maybe not even a red flag anymore, a warning siren LOL
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) not usually. klein only ever thinks/gets 'insecure'/jealous of others' faces if he hears you praising their looks etc. but then even it's just a temporary feeling.
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?) of course. he would feel very devastated because he exists only to be with his darling, to love his darling, only for you.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.) if he's a human, boy wouldn't have a heart shaped ahoge. LMAO
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?) he dislikes the heat. yuck. it could make him overheat! if he has to say something he wouldn't like, it's when his darling starts showing interest for a certain daycare worker cough cough.
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) klein doesn't need sleep. but he can pretend to do it for you. close his eyes, stay way too still (like robots do. LOL) and maybe even make little snoring noises. however, still, he'd prefer to simply lay down by your side and keep himself awake- just admiring how adorable you look like when you're asleep.
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swiftiethatlovesf1 · 2 months ago
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Love strategy p.11
Hi guys, here's the last part and part 10 if you've missed it. If you want to read this story from the beginning, you can find it on my masterlist.
Falling for Carlos is tough when he only sees you as his assistant. But will Lando's daring fake-dating plan make Carlos notice you—or lead your heart somewhere unexpected?
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The crowd around the podium slowly disperses, and you make your way through the throngs of people until you spot Lando. His smile is as bright as the sun, his face flushed from the excitement of his victory. Without hesitation, you rush over and throw your arms around him, hugging him tightly.
“You did amazing out there!” you say, pulling back just enough to look up at him, your eyes shining with pride. “I knew you could do it.”
Lando’s grin widens as he wraps his arms around you, a look in his eyes that’s different from the usual playful glint. “Thanks,” he says softly, and there’s an intensity in his voice that catches you off guard. “I guess I had a bit of extra motivation today.”
“Oh?” You laugh lightly, teasing. “And what might that be?”
His smile softens, and he hesitates for just a second before he speaks. “You,” he says, his gaze never leaving yours. “You’ve been on my mind the whole time. Actually, not just the race—more than that.”
Your heart skips a beat, his words sinking in as he takes a breath, gathering his courage to say more.
“From the beginning,” he continues, voice sincere, “the whole fake dating thing—it was always you, I wanted to catch your attention. I thought…maybe if we spent more time together, you’d see me differently, maybe like me as much as I like you.” His fingers graze your arm gently, his eyes filled with vulnerability. “I’ve seen how Carlos treated you, how he took you for granted. I just… I knew I could treat you better. I wanted to show you that.”
You stare at him, completely floored, your mind spinning with the weight of his confession. He did this all for you. A warmth fills your chest, melting away the lingering doubts you’d held. Lando wasn’t just a friend or a pretend boyfriend—he was someone who truly saw you, appreciated you.
When you don’t say anything right away, a flicker of worry crosses his face, his confidence faltering. “I’m sorry if this is too much. If you’re mad, or—if you don’t feel the same—”
Before he can finish, you take his face in your hands and press your lips to his, silencing his worries in a heartbeat. He responds instantly, kissing you back with a tenderness that makes you feel like the only person in the world.
When you finally pull back, you keep your hands on his face, smiling up at him as his gaze searches yours.
“Carlos hasn’t been on my mind in a long time,” you say softly, “and I don’t think he ever will be again. Because the only person I can think about anymore is you.”
Lando’s eyes light up, and he lets out a quiet laugh, a sound filled with pure relief and joy. He pulls you into him once more, holding you close as he whispers, “Then let’s make this real.” He says as he kisses you again.
As you finish kissing, you give Lando a reassuring squeeze before letting go of his hand. “I’ll be quick,” you say, and he smiles, watching you walk toward the Ferrari motorhome.
Inside, you grab your jumper and are about to leave when you hear a familiar voice. “Hey, can we… talk?” You turn to see Carlos standing nearby, his hands shoved into his pockets and his expression uncharacteristically serious.
You nod, crossing your arms. “Sure. What’s on your mind?”
He sighs, clearly gathering his thoughts. “I know I haven’t been fair to you… and that’s putting it lightly. Watching you over the past couple of weeks… it’s made me see how wrong I was. I know I hurt you.” He pauses, looking away for a moment before his gaze returns to yours, unflinching. “I made you feel like you were just there to do a job and that was it. And when you weren’t, I acted like you were the problem. The truth is… I was just selfish.”
There’s a flicker of pain in his eyes as he continues. “This weekend, seeing you happy, seeing you with Lando—I realized I’d taken you for granted. I didn’t respect what you gave to the team or… to me. I was too focused on myself to see what I was losing.”
You don’t say anything, waiting as he pushes through the discomfort, his words surprisingly open. “I’ve been an ass, and that’s on me. I thought maybe things could go back to normal, but you’ve moved on. And you should.” He takes a shaky breath. “I just hope… we can still be friends. I miss that. And I’m really, really sorry. You didn’t deserve any of this.”
You feel the weight of his words, seeing the genuine regret in his expression. For a moment, you remember the times you did look up to him, the friendship you thought was mutual. You nod, feeling lighter as you say, “I forgive you, Carlos. Really. I don’t want any hard feelings, and… I don’t want to hold on to the past anymore. I know what I want now.”
He looks relieved, offering a small, tentative smile. “Thank you. For everything.”
You say goodbye, leaving the motorhome with a sense of closure you hadn’t realized you needed. As you step outside, you spot Lando waiting for you. His face softens as you approach, and he searches your expression. “Everything okay?”
You slip your hand into his, feeling the steadiness of his warmth. Smiling, you nod. “Yeah,” you say, a sense of clarity settling over you. “Now, everything’s really okay.”
As you walk away together, you feel a renewed sense of happiness, a bright future with Lando ahead of you, free from the weight of the past.
Tag list: @abq654 , @spaceflowergal, @mads94sworld, @anewpersonthatexists, @qlovalova, @itsskavya, anaferreira-4, @willowsnook, @larastark3107, @blueberry648579, @luckyangelballoon, @runs-with-sciss0rs, @gtwdahhh, @edsmunsonsgirl, @under-seasoned-pasta, @marshmummy, @weekendlusting, @jaimeleannavanlloman, @requiemforthepoets
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I hope you've enjoyed the journey as much as I’ve loved bringing it to life. Thank you for following along to the very end! If you’re interested in diving into more stories, feel free to explore other series here. Happy reading :)
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merakiui · 1 year ago
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wait,,, i think i understand malleus's appeal (i say for the nth time, but please hear me out!!!!)
mal is commissioning the most talented artists in all of briar valley to make elegant marble sculptures, watercolor paintings, portraits, etc of you and he worships them with everything he's got. the artists have to be extremely careful and meticulous because if they portray you in a way that offends you or malleus they're being incinerated on the spot. T_T luckily, you often prevent this outcome by appreciating the artist's efforts by honestly expressing your approval for the parts that are indeed praiseworthy, thereby sparing the poor soul. it takes some convincing, but malleus soon comes to see the beauty he neglected to notice before, even if he still swears they got your eyes wrong by a very slight, minuscule detail.
the two of you fuck in the castle gardens. this is sacrosanct. if you ever want to be taken anywhere else that isn't in the bedroom, he'll send everyone away so the two of you are afforded true privacy. also, malleus has this habit where he cups your tummy with his palm so he can feel his dick(s) pressing up and bulging against your belly!!!! he handles you so sweetly and gently AND THE TWO OF YOU ARE SO IN LOVE AAAAAAAAAAA.
he also tends to hover. a lot. he likes being near you, but sometimes if you're doing something and he's not occupied he'll just,,,, tower over you like a second shadow. he doesn't mind the silence, but then he also doesn't realize he hovers. the hovering gets really bad and even more habitual when or if you're pregnant. ;;;; he cannot be away from you for one second; he has to be by your side at all times.
lots of kisses to the top of your hand. lots of tender kisses to your lips. they always feel so chaste and fleeting; he just likes to snag a kiss every now and then hehe. it recharges him. <3 but then also lots of slow, deep kisses stolen in shadowed halls, where he's leaning down and tilting your head to meet his mouth at an angle, and he rests his hand on your waist to pull you flush against him.
if you're ever sad, he's sad. the whole castle gets this incredibly gloomy feeling and depending on the level of sadness it may even be felt over briar valley. ^^;;; similarly, when you're happy he's happy. he doesn't need anything else, for he already has everything he could ever want (you).
he's a really good listener. the type who never zones out while you're talking and he listens so intently to everything you say. he will gladly sit and listen to you rant or vent or excitedly ramble about all manner of things. he thinks your enthusiasm is very attractive. of course, if you're venting, he's ready to get rid of the thing or person causing you such anguish. think the meme of "is the sun bothering you, my beloved?" with the person pointing the gun at the sun.
this is one of the many dynamics you likely have with mal:
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sillydandelion · 3 months ago
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Fluffy rafa morning fic bc i love him so so much <33. inspired by my last Qrt bc yes! Also I am NOT a writer, I do not write like almost ever so pls have mercy thanks!!!
Pairing: Reader x Rafayel
It was a Sunday- basically the day of sleeping in. Luckily for you, Rafayel had other plans.
It was early, the sun was rising, and you were looking forward to cuddling with your silly fishie beloved. Sadly, you could see that he was indeed not next to you, probably on another one of his creative endeavors- it appears his inspiration struck early. You close your eyes again.
A few minutes or hours passed, you couldn't tell, but you suddenly feel a tilt in the mattress next to you. Too tired and groggy to react, you just closed your eyes again and pretended to be asleep. You swallow.
She drapes over you softly, his lips brushing against your ear.
"You swallowed. People don't swallow when they're asleep"
He murmurs softly, and you could feel him smiling. You don't react however, still pretending to sleep. You aren't a morning person, what's wrong with that!
"You know, there's a monster that eats children who get out of bed late"
He whispers again, this time, his nose was nuzzling into the side of your face, wanting to press a soft, tender kiss on your cheek. Or so you thought.
"Om nom nom nom!"
Instead, his mouth opened and was now nipping and biting your cheek instead. Startled, you squeaked and shoved him away, your shoulder brushing your cheek to clean off his dumb fish saliva.
"Ugh! Rafa, what's wrong with you!" You murmur groggily, face scrunched up as you pat the spot he bit. You finally open your eyes, slightly squinting from the light coming from the windows. Immediately you see him, chuckling to himself.
"Ah, so you're awake. I warned you about the monster." He coos, his eyes filled with playfulness and mischief, moving forward to remove your hand and kiss the spot instead, a quiet apology.
"First of all, I'm not a kid, second of all, there was no need for that!" You slaps his shoulder playfully. Curse his pretty face and pretty smile, it was contagious- and his smiled widened at seeing you join in.
"Ouch! Have mercy on me for waking you up!"
He whines dramatically, his face further nuzzling into yours, peppering your face with soft kisses- like he always did in the morning. Your forehead, your eyebrows, the corners of your eyes, your beauty marks... the list goes on. Point is; he never misses a spot. You couldn't help but melt.
A content sigh escapes your mouth as he showers you with affections, still too tired to do anything about it- not that you'd push him away, you enjoyed these moments more than words could ever express. But you were still half asleep.
"Still sleepy, beautiful?" He whispers against your skin. The way he always called you beautiful never failed to make your heart skip a beat- he sounded so genuine it made your heart hurt.
You hum in agreement, arms wrapping around him as you pull him down onto you. Early mornings made you cuddly.
"It's okay. We can cuddle alll day long"
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georgiapeach30513 · 1 year ago
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Feels Like Sin
Summary: This isn't the life that you thought you would live, but Jax isn't going to let you go. You belong to him. ONLY him.
Pairings: Fae!Jax Teller X Reader
Rating: explicit
Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, kidnapping, chasing, a form of drugging, dub con, dry humping, voyeurism, unprotected sex, mentions of overstimulation, spanking, creampie, humiliation, obsession, secrets and lies, self mutilation (Jax), 18+ ONLY
Word Count: 5.2K
Previous
Series Masterlist
*dividers created by @firefly-graphics
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You dig a small hole in the dank bag. You need air. Sunlight. And a way to process your fears of what was happening to you. Looking through the pathetic hole to see yourself moving in the wrong direction. Faeries of the Spring Court never ventured here.
Branches turn into gnarly thorns, and you squeak in fear. Kicking your leg on the back of the ogre that stuffed you in here. “Easy does it, you pipsqueak. The king will love you.”
“No!” You start to blubber. Where was your king? Steve would protect you. Or would he? Even he didn’t come into the Dark Court. He only saw the king when there was a meeting of sorts. So you were told. “Please, I’ll do whatever you want.”
“Suck my cock then,” his laugh bellows out before he drops you and the bag on the forest floor. You peek your head out, gasping for fresh air, but it is too damp. Fog hangs over in the forest, making it impossible to see five feet in front of you.
“Well go on, tiny,” his chubby little hands start to reach into his pants, and you slam your hands over your eyes, shaking your head no. “What’s wrong? You telling me you never had the shiny king’s cock in your little holes?”
“No, Steve never asks us to do that. Steve is kind, he isn’t like you!”
“Oh, bullshit. You are the most frivolous of the courts. All you do is fuck,” of all the lies in Collingswood, you had never done anything of the sort.
“That’s summer,” you sniffle, still refusing to look at him. You could feel his warm breath too close to you, and you try to shuffle away from him, but his sweaty hand holds tightly to your foot. “Steve doesn’t…he wouldn’t,” his finger tries to push your hand off your eyes, but you keep them covered. “No! I don’t want to look at your disgusting penis!”
“You’d rather be eaten by the Dark King instead of sucking my cock? I can find another flower faerie. You are the prettiest ones in the glen. So delicate,” he flicks his fingers over your hair, and you want to sink into the earth.
“You smell so nice. Have the prettiest smiles. Won’t you show me your smile, tiny?”
“I have nothing to smile about. You’re going to shove your disgusting penis into me, and I don’t want it,” tears flow out your eyes and you try to remember your warm spot beside the creek. A perfect spot to dance in the wind while your king smiled at you. He wasn’t like the rest of them. Steve was good. He loved and adored his court.
“Your king isn’t as precious as you want him to be.”
“He’s not kidnapping faeries from other courts to be fed on, is he?”
“He just makes his queen watch as he fucks his flower faeries.”
“No he doesn’t,” you scream, yanking your arms off your eyes. The oaf of a fae was sitting down in front of you. Invading your personal space, but fully clothed. You hate him for the lies that he spews about your court, and your king, “Steve would never.”
“You know nothing about your king. All faeries run off sex.”
“Steve runs of pure kindness,” his laugh bellows through the glade, but then he surprises you, leaning forward to touch the petals of your dress with an odd tenderness. Making you confused with the quick change, “Stop that!”
“We don’t get flowers here, pipsqueak.”
“All these thorns, and no roses?” He shakes his head no. His eyes flick up towards you before quickly looking away. “What’s your name?”
“Lee. Now get in the bag. Jax is hungry.”
“Oh, god, he’s going to eat me.”
“Most women would love to be eaten by Jax and his magic tongue. But he doesn’t eat flesh. He eats emotions. Seeing how his latest meal was stolen from him, I need you to be afraid. Suck my cock or get back in the bag,” you thought you were making some progress with the troll, but no. He is still threatening you. “Go on, little bit. I got a big cock just for you.”
“Oh my god!” Your scream echoes through the thorns, and Lee smiles when a shift in the wind happens.
“Run,” he whispers, and you don’t hesitate to jump up, sprinting as far away from him as possible. Too caught up in your tears to realize you are running deeper into the maze of thorns. And he laughs. Cleaning up his bag before making his way to his post. Chuckling at how stupid flower faeries were without their king. Predictable in their simpleness.
Jax licks his lips, already savoring your fear. His ringed fingers burn with anticipation. You wouldn’t be scarred or tattooed, but being scared was the next best thing. Your panting breaths pulses in his veins, and his eyes dart in the direction you were running. Right to him.
He was a drug, and he knew it. They all feared him, and yet always ran right to him. He hoped you’d only be as delectable as Andy’s human. You couldn’t be. She was damaged. She was supposed to be for Jax. He could feel it. Could still taste it.
He fakes a pout when he hears you cry out in pain. Flower fae were too stupid to wear shoes in his realm. But then again, they were never asked. They were forced. Remained here once their sunshine was drained. Ashamed to go back to their king that would hold them, and share his light.
But they were forever corrupt. Filled with Jax’s darkness, and willing to do everything for their king. Would serve him in ways that would be thought of as sinful. But it was just pleasure. Flower fae were not meant to stay in darkness. They needed their king and sunshine to bloom.
You gasp as you see his shadow stand up. Seemingly so much larger than Steve. Your comfort and safe space. He was terrifying. “Don’t run. You need your foot looked at. Some of those thorns are poisonous,” you gulp, finally pulling out the giant thorn in your foot, and Jax takes a deep inhale at the scent that permeates the air.
“You do suck on people’s blood,” you whine. Having to sit on the floor of the forest, and hold your foot. It hurt worse pulling it out.
“It’s all lies they tell about me, sweetheart. Can I?” Jax squats down in front of you, reaching for your foot. What other choice did you have than to extend it to him. He looks at the hole from whence the thorn was before licking his thumb and pressing it to your foot.
Instant relief. That is until you see smoke billowing off you, and the pain. Scurrying out of his grasp, you look at the scorched upper part of your foot, “What did you do?” He holds up his hands, and you notice the rings on his fingers had created a scarred effect on his skin.
Indented in on him and singed on every finger, “Iron,” he answers softly. “Makes me stronger. Makes the legends of me more fearful. Helps me feel my own pain when all I can usually feel is others. Imagine pain being something you feed off. You forget your own self and what it actually feels like. This helps me remember me. And now it no longer works. But my ugly hands remind people of what a psycho I truly can be.”
“So you do want to eat me?”
“Not you, you tiny little thing. Your emotions. The dark ones that Steve won’t allow you to have. What type of flower are you?” You grunt at him. You are getting tired of everyone talking bad about your king. Steve wasn’t anything like they were saying. He just wasn’t. He was good.
“Aw, did I offend you? What silly name did Lee call you? I was going to call you by your flower, but I’ll take what he said.”
“Tiny and pipsqueak,” every word is short and enunciated. You hate him. Both of them. You want to go home and back into the sunlight. Have Steve pull you up into his lap where he holds onto you, letting you absorb his warmth.
“Keep hating me, Tiny. Your petals are pretty,” you are a pretty little thing. Smaller than the others were. Adorable. Your fear was matched just as equally as your loyalty to your court. There was a bite to you. “What kind of petals are they?”
“Rose,” you stub up, refusing to look at him. He was a monster. You heard all the stories. Steve warned you about Jax, and why you shouldn’t trust him.
“Do you prefer that name?”
“I’d prefer to go home.”
“In time, Tiny. I am hungry,” you put on a brave face, but your lip trembles. Delicious. You are almost as intoxicating as Andy’s human. His human. She belonged with Jax. Andy hated humans. Jax treasured them.
“I think you and I could help each other. One quick taste, and then, I have a job for you.”
“Will I get to go back home?”
“Depends on how good you do. Now crawl over into my lap, let me get a little taste. It won’t hurt. In fact, it’s almost orgasmic,” you furrow your brow as you look at him. “Oh, you haven’t sat on Steve’s lap, huh? Had him stuff you full with cock?” You had sat on his lap, but not to do something as disgusting as that. Steve was warmth. He was change and growth.
You shake your head as you start to crawl towards Jax. Perfection. “It’s the best drug you’ve ever had,” he whispers, reaching over to grab you up, and putting you on his lap. You wince at the feeling of his rings touching your exposed skin.
His nose tickles up your neck as he inhales your scent. Flattening out his tongue he licks up the column of your neck before you feel a prick on your sensitive skin, and then dreams. Like there are clouds floating around your body. High and in a world of your own. Whimpering at the feel.
Lee peeks at you and Jax. Selfishly wishing it was his lap that you were grinding on. Your eyes are so blown wide with pleasure you didn’t even know what you were doing. Jax did. He moans right along with you. He bet you tasted like heaven. If there was one.
Your petals rise up and show off your glimmering skin. You had marks etched on you. No wonder you smelled like that. He knew it when he threw the bag over your body. You are special. Beautiful. Perfect. Immaculate. Different than the other flower fae he had captured.
“Ahh,” Jax moans, pulling off your body. Letting you ride out your high as you rode his stomach. “You need a taste, Lee?” Lee could be jealous, but Jax was generous. Waiting until Lee sits down before he shuffles your body on him. Biting on his lip as you grind down on him.
“She’s a pretty little thing, huh?” Lee nods his head as his breathing picks up. You are perfect. “She’s tasty. Wonder what the honey between her thighs tastes like? Maybe one day I’ll get to indulge. I have something bigger planned for her. I need humans. I need their ink,” Lee’s hand nervously tries to keep your thigh covered. Jax shouldn’t know about it.
“She’s adorable. While the veil is still open, I want her to entice broken humans to me.”
“But, sire?”
“You can accompany her, just don’t be seen. You might scare them. Enjoy your ride, and put her in my bed when she passes out from her pleasure. Poor thing never felt an orgasm before. Too bad she won’t remember it. But she will crave me,” his dark laugh bellows out before retreating into the thorns. Jax was always up to something. Lee could only tolerate it.
But for now, he was going to rub his hands up and down your thighs. Let you ride out your high for as long as you need. Beautiful. Perfection. Sinful. You’ll fit right in. Letting yourself go into darkness as your petals shift over your skin. Getting sight of your perfect tits as your nipples start to poke out.
Cupping both your breasts, his thumb rubs over the hardened buds, and you moan. Overcome with this new feeling. His finger and thumb close over each nipple, and he squeezes. Adding more pressure when you start to whimper. You like it. Love it. The darkness is already spreading through you. Spring shouldn’t enjoy even a little bit of pain. They were innocent and vanilla.
He wants you tied to his bed begging for him. But for now he’s going to enjoy the vision of your tits bouncing in his face and wanting more. More pain. More Lee. More darkness. He’ll give it to you. He’ll give you everything that Jax refuses.
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“You get back here!” Lee growls as you run through the forest of thorns. Knowing where to duck and jump at just the right time. His goal was to keep you away from the king, and he’s succeeded most of the time.
“Argh!” He screams out when he loses sight of you. “You’re not going to like what you see!” His voice yells up into the sky. Shaking his head, he starts to sludge towards Jax’s palace. You’d brought him a human, and your deepest desire is to see what he did with the humans. Lee’s job was to keep you away from those creatures as Jax fed. He failed. He would pay. He is not looking forward to Jax’s wrath.
Slinking through the hallways, you listen to Jax’s deep groans. The screams of the human makes your skin crawl the closer you get. He has to be torturing her. Eventually murder her. Your morbid curiosity gets the best of you as you skip a few of the tiles, knowing that they would alert Jax to your whereabouts.
His door is opened a bit, and you have to peer through it. Watching his scarred back where his wings used to be. The skin is raised and still raw. Rippling with every thrust of his hips. The human woman’s hands start to claw into his skin, but he slams her hands above her head, growling something in her ear.
You can’t look away. You’d never seen your new king in such a vulnerable state. Completely nude with the woman. Unable to tell if she’s in pain or if those were cries of pleasure. Leaning into the door, it creaks and Jax turns his head. His minty green eyes locking in on you. His mouth sets into a frown, before he smirks.
Moving off the woman he turns her to look at you. Placing her on her knees before his hips slam into her backside. She is blind and doesn’t even see you, but his cold eyes stare at nothing else but you. Gnarling his teeth as he slaps her rounded ass, and you go to turn. “Don’t you dare!” He growls.
“You wanted to see. Watch it,” he chuckles as you start to step backwards, but your back hits Lee’s chest instead.
“I told you that you wouldn’t like it,” his breath is warm on your neck as he whispers right into your ear. “She’s enjoying it.”
“Why is she screaming then?” You can’t look away. It is horrible the way he is angrily jabbing himself into her.
“Pleasure. Some people get off on pain,” Jax’s hand wraps around her hair, and he forces her to look up at you. Make you see the recoil in her breasts. Her eyes are dead. “He overstimulates them before he ever enters them. This is what we call fucking. She’s so blinded by the over indulgence of pleasure she doesn’t even know where she is. Won’t remember coming beyond the veil.”
“He looks like an animal. He does this to all my humans?”
Lee’s hand slides over your stomach, pressing you tight against him, “Your humans?”
“I brought them to him. I bring them to slaughter.”
“They won’t remember much. He devours their sadness, their pain, and then he pleasures them with pain. They need him just as much as he needs them,” he moans on your neck. Unable to contain himself. You had started to roll your body with Jax’s movements. It isn’t as harsh as his stabbing, but it was just what Lee needs. Letting your tight little ass circle on his swollen crotch.
“They’ll be a new human tomorrow. Just flashes of a memory of this moment,” Lee sees Jax’s eyes flick to your thigh, and he stares horrified at your bare leg. Your petals had rode up, and the veining of your mark could be seen. Quickly he tries to pull it back down, but Jax knows what he saw. Lee has been lying to him.
Slapping at her ass again, Jax’s motions begin to jerk before he stops all together. “You want to clean me off?” He grins, pulling out of her, and he turns her behind to you. “You see how gaping I made her? Go on, darling, push it out.”
“Jax!” Lee shouts from behind you as you spin around, and hug yourself to his chest. “Enough!” Jax lets the woman’s body fall to the bed and he stalks over to Lee poking him hard on the shoulder.
“You’re too damn soft on her.”
“And you are bonded to her, and still want to embarrass her.”
“You were supposed to be watching her. She wanted to see. Wanted to see what my cock is used for, and now she has. You did that bitch a favor, Pipsqueak. She was in the depths of despair when you brought her to me, and now she has a high better than any fucking drug. She’ll go back with the humans as new woman. She won’t be sticking a needle in her vein, or having sex for money. She’ll have aspirations. You did a good thing,” his voice starts to calm, and the anger no longer right at the edge, “Pip? C’mere, darling.”
“No,” you mumble against Lee’s chest, “You’re naked, and smell of her.”
“Darling, I just want to hold you. It’s what you really need.”
“I said no!” You dare to look over at him, and his brows furrow. “I don't need you!”
“The hell you don’t! You’ll always need me, Pip. And you!” His gnarly finger points at Lee, “You have failed me, yet again. You have one job, keep the Pipsqueak away from my sessions. And you’re a fucking liar.”
“I’ve not lied to you,” he only wasn’t honest. He knew Jax would become obsessed with the mark on your leg. It was hardly noticeable. Nothing to get excited over.
“Withholding information is a lie, and punishable by death!”
“No!” Screaming, you turn around holding your arms out in front of Lee, “Don’t you touch him! I will tell Andy!”
“Don’t you dare scream your idle threats at me. He gets punished.”
“No,” you no longer scream, and Jax tilts his head down to look at you. “Punish me instead. He didn’t do anything. I did this. I came to find you because I needed to know why I couldn’t watch. Lee didn’t do anything. Jax, please, he’s my only friend.”
Jax’s hand goes to your chin, and he lifts you up to fully look at him. You grit your teeth as his iron rings burn your skin. You had learned well, and the urge he has to praise you gets pushed down. Now wasn’t the time, “I can’t hurt you, Pip.”
“And I can’t let you hurt him. Punish me. Do what you want.”
“No,” Lee pulls you tighter to him, but you shake your head looking at Jax. Your new king. And you wouldn’t allow him to hurt your friend.
“Please, use me instead of Lee,” Jax loved it when you asked nicely. Something inside of him stirs every time that your soft voice pleads for him to do something for you.
“Show me your leg,” Lee told you never to let Jax see your thigh, but what choice did you have now. You slide a petal over to the side, and Jax gawks at the vine that was fairly small. He sinks to his knees, and presses his nose against your thigh, sniffing up the length of the vine before his tongue flattens on your skin, and you push him away from you.
“Your punishment is to be in my bed every night. And you…I’m not finished with you, you miserable excuse of a man.”
“He is no man,” you remind Jax. “And neither are you.”
“Get this cleaned up, Lee.”
“I won’t sleep in the bed where you’ve had other women. I don’t want them on my skin,” Jax lets out a low growl, but his eyes move to the raw skin on your jawline. You took the pain. You were becoming part of his court, and still not growing weaker like the other flower fae. But, they would have already been bouncing on his cock. So you did deserve different quarters.
“Fine. Care to join me for a bath, Pip?”
“No.”
“Suit yourself. Lee, get used to useless work, you coward.”
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“Pip, come here, darling,” you look across the room into the bed where Jax sits, shaking your head. “You get your tiny little ass in here, I feel we need to talk.”
“You won’t hurt me?”
“Do you remember our bargain?” You shrug your shoulders, walking a bit more into the room. Faerie bargains can be a bit difficult, and you aren’t sure about your own with the king of sly words. “I can’t take from you as long as you bring me my humans. Have I ever taken from you, Pipsqueak?” Shaking your head no, Jax lifts his hand up to you, wanting you to take it on your own.
“I haven’t. We have both kept our end of the bargain.”
“But…I’m taking Lee’s punishment.”
He pulls you in between his thighs. His fingers no longer clad with iron rings, and his hands rub softly up and down your legs. Gone is the pain you always feel when he touches you. No longer a scent of burning flesh. A permanent indentation from his self caused pain of wearing iron. His thumb toys on the line of your mark, and you push him away. “Don’t fight me, Pip, you will lose.”
“Are you going to make me?”
“Make you what? Take my cock? No, darling. I have no desire to squeeze myself in your tiny little body. Why do you want to take on Lee’s punishment? He failed his job, and he was hiding your little secret from me.”
“It’s not a secret,” Jax raises his eyebrows as he stares down at you. “It’s not!”
“Where did you get them? You let someone mark your body, and didn’t tell me. You know how I love the taste of ink. Where did you get it?” His finger goes back to the edge of your mark, and as long as he doesn’t drift up him higher, you’ll allow this space.
“I was born with it.”
“That’s impossible. Only…Pip, who is your father?” You shrug your shoulders because you truly didn’t know who your father was. But you aren’t lying about the vines. “Let me taste it.”
“No,” his stomach rumbles with frustration. You always denied him at first. “That’s why I bring you humans. Lee said you shouldn’t know unless you asked. You never asked,” his hands on your thigh, roam up to your hips, settling on your waist before he lifts you up, and forces you on his lap. Straddling him, and your mark pokes out from beneath your dressing gown. It was getting darker. Bigger. More vibrant than before. The color was just as dark as his own.
“Do I scare you?”
“You can’t hurt me.”
“I can’t take from you. You can give to me though. There’s the difference, my tiny little Pipsqueak. You should know to make your intentions clear when making a bargain. I could make you scream and beg for me to take from you just to stop the pain. You’d do well in remembering that. Touch me. Go on, touch me. Run your dainty little hands up my chest. We’re bound together, darling, I own you. I can do whatever I want to with you, as long as I don’t take from you. Not even your life, but there are things much worse than death. Touch me!” He screams right at your face.
Your hands slide up his decorated chest. Using your fingers to trace the outlines of his own tattoos. Smiling when he starts to shudder, and then you slide down his back. Rubbing the pads of your fingers over his marred skin where his wings used to bed. “Enough!”
He pushes you onto the floor, and buries his face into his hands, “No one ever touches me there.”
“Why?”
“My cruel brother had them ripped off my back. Laughed as I crawled away from him. People want to act like I’m the monster, why don’t you ask Andy how many humans he has killed. I have never once killed a human. I leave them more human than they were before. I was made to be the villain, and stuffed into this desolate forest of thorns, but I make due with what I have. Stronger than he ever could be because I allow the pain to happen. Pain makes us more…human,” peering up into his minty green eyes, you lean your head to the side.
Jax didn’t fear, but he longed to be human. Wanted to feel the way a human did. “Humans love.”
“I have no love to give, Pip. It’s why I feed off their emotions; it's something real. Not this too long of a life that we are forced to live,” Jax was the second oldest faerie in the glen. Only his brother was older than him, and you wondered just how old he was. What he has seen in his life. What he has felt. Once upon a time Jax and Andy cohabited together.
“What do you do with them…”
“Would you want to feel it?” His grin turns devilish as his foot pushes your thighs apart. Staring at your core, “You’re curious,” heat radiates from you, and onto his foot. You were more than just curious. You are quaking with the need to feel it.
“It will hurt. You promised not to hurt me.”
“My word is as useless as dirt. But I assure you it’ll only hurt for a moment.”
“And then you throw me away just like your precious humans?” He runs his foot up through your center. Letting his warmth linger over your mound, and you tremble. You had never felt something quite like that before. Although it was familiar.
“I’d never throw you away, Pip. That’s a promise.”
“Your word is as useless as dirt.”
“This doesn’t feel good? Doesn’t it make you want and need my touch? Shake your head no at me, I can feel your pulse in between your legs. Just sit in my lap, and I’ll show you how good I can make you feel.”
“I have stipulations,” gulping, you look up at him. You did want to know what it felt like, but there is something you desire more. “I will, but I don’t want you inside me, and I want to know why Andy did that to you.”
“Not tonight, but I will tell you. In time. If you allow me to see all of you,” standing up, you knock off the shoulders of your dressing gown. Letting the thin material slide off your curves, and onto the floor. Bringing your arms up to cover your chest, but he shakes his head no, “I said all of you.”
Dropping your hands to the side, he lifts up his finger, twirling it around, asking you to do the same. Taking one step at a time, you turn around. Baring everything to him. Feeling his eyes trail up and down your body, you shudder. He was looking at you like his next meal, “My beautiful tiny Pipsqueak,” his? Your breathing speeds up as you turn back around to look at him.
“Now, let’s put you to bed, crawl back on my lap. I’ll give you the smallest taste of my sin,” your feet feel like lead as you put one in front of the other. Crawling onto his lap, and his thumb goes back to your vine. Sliding up and down it, while also dipping lower to your core. “I should have asked you to spread your legs. Maybe I could have seen where this leads to.”
“Is it me, my body, or the vines that I have no control over that you desire most?” Giving a bit of a smirk, Jax watches as the vines deepen, ridges sprout along it with every grind you do over his body. Your brain might not remember, but your body did. Craved him, and the friction.
“They’re changing,” he hums, finally looking up at you. “Does this mean your darkness is blooming? Or are you going to deny me again?” You sit silently, apart from your heavy breathing. Gripping onto his shoulders, you bare down even harder. Letting your body give into the temptation and pleasure as you pinch your eyes closed. Going outside of your mind for a moment.
Jax’s eyes flick over to the door, holding those blue eyes as he bends closer to your bouncing tits. Giving a smile before his mouth circles around your pebbled peak, and you mewl. Moving harder. Faster. Giving to him what he has wanted, while he watches the man conflicted.
Lee goes from glaring at Jax to watching your beautiful body writhe over him. The tent in his pants is painful, straining against his clothes. That should be him. You offered yourself up for Lee’s punishment, and yet, here he is still being punished. Always. Jax knew the hold that you had over Lee, and he tortured him with it.
“Let me enter inside of you, Pip!” He begs, moving his mouth to your other tit.
“Tell me about Andy,” his sucks turn into a bite, and you laugh. Leaning back, you rest your hands on his knees, letting him view your tattoo even closer. “Then look at what you will never have.”
He doesn’t even care about the tattoo, just your puffy cunt that was on his stomach. He growls out your name as you move to get up. “You have no power over me, Jax. We’re bonded, but you don’t own me. Lash at me, spank me, do whatever you need to in order to pay for Lee’s punishment. We’re done for the night.”
“I said in my bed!”
I was in your bed, and now I’m leaving to get some sleep. You can have all of me if you tell me about Andy,” Lee’s eyes flash bright blue before he steps back in the shadows. You didn’t need him right now. You were doing just fine on your own. “Let me take your pain.”
“I don’t want you to.”
“Then suffer alone,” you whisper, grabbing up your gown before walking back to your own bed. Glutton for punishment. Jax would never get over it, and with that came his suffering. His downfall. His own living hell.
Next
Masterlist
@tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @peaches1958 @seitmai @smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers @cjand10 @midnightramyeoncravings @kmc1989 @floral-recs @theinheriteddutchess @pandaxnienke
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forever-rogue · 1 year ago
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Hiiii 🐻
What about an Eddie fic where they are at an award show nominated in the same category but they are exs. They ended things because right person wrong time type of deal. His career took off and hers was in the early stages.
And he wins the award and spots her in the crowd
Link for reference
https://www.tiktok.com/@editsmcu/video/7045316909562219782?lang=en
Tumblr media
AN | I changed the prompt just a little but I hope y’all enjoy! 🥰
Warnings | Language
Pairing | Modern!Rockstar!Eddie x Fem!Reader
Word Count | 2.7k
Masterlist | Main, Eddie 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
"He's going to be there, you know," the soft tone of her voice caused you to look up from your phone as you caught her eye in the mirror. Your grip around your phone tightened as her expression turned doe-eyed, "Eddie. His band is nominated for a few awards."
You knew that, of course you did. You wouldn't admit that you still closely kept up with what was going on with him. But, despite the fact that you'd broken up almost a year ago, you still cared deeply for him. 
"Oh," you swallowed the thick lump that had welled up in your throat, trying to keep the tears at bay, "well, that's alright. These things will continue to happen and I'll just have to learn to deal with it."
"You'll be okay?" She finished up your hair and settled her gentle hands on your shoulders. She gave you a tender squeeze as you nodded, "if you need anything, you can always text or call me. I'm not your hairdresser but your friend too, and I'm here for you."
"I'll be alright," you promised, heart constricting at the kindness she displayed, "I'll just have to learn how to deal."
"You'll do great, my love," her smile was gentle, "you're solid gold and one day you'll find exactly what you're looking for."
What if you had lost what you had been looking for?
"Thank you."
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Eddie was sprawled on the couch in the studio, scrolling endlessly through his social media. A heavy sigh escaped his lips despite his best efforts; he was feeling a type of way he couldn’t quite explain. It wasn’t bored or tired or…anything really, just sort of down. 
“Hey man,” Jeff sat down at the opposite end of the couch causing Eddie to lift his head in question, “I just heard that umm…well, she is going to be there tomorrow night.”
Eddie tried not to let his face light up entirely but it was hard not to perk up at even the smallest mention of you. His heart ached as he pictured your face; it had been so long since he’d even seen you in person. To put it quite frankly, it sucked. 
“Oh?” He tried to keep his voice as nonchalant as possible but even he could hear the curiosity in his voice, “how did you find that out?”
“Seth told me,” ah. Of course their manager would know all about that, “wonder why she’s going. She’s not even a musician, just an actor…maybe she’s someone’s date or something…”
“Date?” and yeah he almost choked on that singular word. The idea of you going on a date made anger bubble in his blood, “you don’t seriously think that she’s dating someone, do you?”
“I dunno man,” Jeff shrugged lightly, “I mean…you were the one that broke up with her. And it’s been almost a year. She's going to date someone else eventually."
"I know!" He snapped, rubbing his tired face with his hands. Jeff recoiled slightly from Eddie's sudden sharpness. He knew that you were still a sore subject for him and he'd hope to negate any bad feelings by warning him that you'd be there. But now he was wondering if he'd made a mistake - maybe Eddie wouldn't even have noticed you.
"I'm sorry, Ed. You'll be alright," he offered him a tight lipped smile, "and it'll be over before we know it."
"Yeah," he replied dismissively, raking a hand through his messy curls, "let's fucking hope so."
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
"You look amazing."
You studied yourself intently in the mirror, staring at the dark pink dress that you were currently sporting. Your mind had immediately drifted to wondering if Eddie would have liked your dress. He always enjoyed the fact that you were so opposite of him. Sunshine and rain, he'd always said, balancing each other out.
So much for that. But you tried not to dwell on the past. You'd already given into the fact that you would ever be completely over him. A part of your heart would always belong to him.
"Thanks," you smiled but it didn't quite reach your eyes. You were nervous going to the awards show tonight, even if you were just going to accompany one of your friends. 
Your stylist touched up your hair and set your makeup before letting you go. After you slipped on your heels and waited for your ride, you couldn't help but go on to IG and scroll through photos of the red carpet to see who had already arrived. 
Everything was fine until you reached a post that caused your heart to almost stop. There was Eddie, looking as gorgeous as ever, standing on the red carpet with the rest of his band members. You'd be lying if you said you weren't relieved to see that he didn't have a date.
Not that it mattered. Of course not. It was all peaches and he could do whatever he wanted. Even if it would break your heart a little further.
"Your chariot has arrived ," you looked up when you saw Angelica walk through the door. You let out a sigh of relief when you saw her standing there, looking as amazing as you hoped you did too, "ready to go?"
"Yup," you grabbed your bag and walked over to her but you could tell that something was on her mind, "what's wrong?"
"I…Gareth texted me a little while ago. They're already all there," she gave your shoulder as a squeeze. You appreciated all the concern but it really wasn't helping. It would have been preferable to just have everyone ignore the blatant obviousness that Eddie would be there.
"It's fine," you insisted softly, "really. I'd rather just not worry about it at all. It is what it is; he broke up with me and that's it."
"Babe-"
"Seriously," you took her hand and squeezed it gently, "let's just go and have fun."
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
One of the many wonderful things about Eddie was that he didn’t really care what anyone thought of him. Even as a world famous rockstar, he couldn’t really be bothered to worry about that. So he didn’t worry about the way he looked around the crowd, blatantly obvious as he scanned the sea of people for you. Unabashed and unashamed as ever. 
Just when he’d almost given up, he found you. Clear across the room, looking stunning as ever and sitting among your friends. He knew them all and he knew that you wouldn’t be anyone’s date, not like that anyway, and that served to put him at ease. A silly, dopey little smile tugged up the corner of his mouth. 
But then he remembered - you weren’t his. Not anymore and more than likely never again. 
“You gonna keep staring all night?” Eddie’s cheeks pinked as he turned his gaze away and back to Jeff, “you couldn’t be anymore obvious!”
“Shut up,” Eddie hissed as he shifted in his seat so he couldn’t look at you as easily, “it was just one look.”
“Mhmm,” he raised an eyebrow and pulled up his phone, showing Eddie a few articles that had already popped up. All about the two of you - speculation that this meant that the two of you were back together or fans attempting to manifest it, “you’re only going to make it worse.”
Eddie folded his arms across his chest and shrugged, “it’ll be fine. Let’s just hope this night goes fast.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
A few hours had passed, in relative ease and peace, and you were relieved to know that it was almost over. Then you could go home, have a hot bath with a glass of wine, and get some much needed sleep. 
But then the award that Eddie’s band was nominated for was announced. You listened to the announcer rattle off the nominees, heart beating wildly in your chest as you hoped that he didn’t win. It was so incredibly selfish, you knew that much, but it was just all too much at once. 
Corroded Coffin won, which didn’t really didn’t come as a surprise to you or anyone else. It was a well deserved and hard fought win, and you knew it should have been them. You clapped along with everyone around you, watching the stage closely as the guys walked on, with Eddie coming up last. Suddenly it seemed like he was the only one in the room and you couldn’t take your eyes off him. He looked good, but worst of all he still looked just like Eddie. 
He hung back as the rest of the band all spoke, but you could see him scanning the crowd. When it was finally his turn, he laughed nervously before looking out into the audience and somehow managing to find you. His eyes looked with yours as a small gasp escaped your lips. You knew that he was aware that he was staring right at you. A smile spread on his face, easy and soft just like the one he’d blessed you with so many times. Despite everything that had happened you couldn’t help but smile back at him. 
It didn’t matter what he was saying, you were only vaguely away of it, the moment was all that mattered. People scattered throughout the audience seemed to catch onto what was happening; you could hear them tittering about and looking at you and back at Eddie. It made your face warm up but none of that mattered. The moment belonged solely to you and Eddie. 
Unfortunately it was over much too soon for your liking and the boys were herded off stage. You turned your attention back to the table and you could feel the silent questions being thrown your way. Ignoring them all you grabbed your glasses and chugged down the rest of the champagne. 
What a series of unfortunate, or perhaps fortunate, events.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
After it was all said and done and you were ready to head home, insisting on taking a cab so and skipping the afterparty, much to Angelica’s dismay, you made your way out of the building, heels in hand. It was quiet here and allowed you a few moments to breathe and absorb all that happened. 
Then you heard your name being called out. Urgently and loudly, in a voice you’d heard so many times before. You had two options - keep walking and pretend you hadn’t heard or didn’t care, or face him. You knew which one you wanted, long before the opportunity had even presented itself. 
You turned around and found Eddie running towards you, his curls bouncing wildly. He didn’t stop until he was right in front of you, attempting to catch his breath. 
“Eddie?” your voice was small, so soft he almost didn’t hear it. You opened and closed your mouth a few times, trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach, “what are you doing here?”
“You,” he said softly as your expression turned doe-eyed; that look always made him look weak in the knees, “miss you - had to see you.”
“You missed me?” he nodded, taking a last gasping breath before straightening up and looked at you.Your brain felt like it was turning to much as you tried to process everything taht was going, “what do you mean?”
“I fucked up,” he shrugged and threw up his arms in exasperation. He was so mad at himself for ever letting you go, “I fucked up and I lost and I just…I really fucking miss you.”
“Eddie, you’re the one that broke up with me,” you blinked back tears as he ran a hand through his messy curls, “but now you miss me?”
“I should never have broken up with you,” he shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping those plush lips you so desperately missed kissing, “biggest mistake ever.”
“Then why did you?”
“I…I thought I was doing the right thing,” he explained, “I thought I was going enough for you and with things really taking off with the band, it felt like I didn’t have enough time for you and didn’t treat you the way you deserve to be treated. It seemed like the right thing at the time. I figured that maybe you would fine someone that deserves you but honestly, I really hate the fucking idea of anyone else having you.”
“Oh. Oh,” the realization crashed over you like ice cold waves, “well, I admit the idea behind breaking up with me was admirable, but deciding how I felt wasn’t exactly your choice. I never thought you weren’t good enough or didn’t give me enough of you. Eddie, I was so in love with you, nothing else mattered. We could have figured things out together - we always have. I never wanted anyone else, and no one even crossed my mind. Even now, almost a year later.”
“Really?” he choked on his question, feeling his own eyes start to burn with tears.
“Yeah,” you promised him, reaching over to give his arm a gentle squeeze, “it’s getting late. I should head home.”
“Ba - wait-”
“It was good to see you,” and you meant it. It was good to see him, and hear him out, and maybe it would serve as a bit of closure. You tried to walk away, but he held onto your hand and gently kept you from walking away, “Eddie?”
“Wait, just,” he stammered as he tried to format even a coherent sentence, “I-I love you. I’m still in love with you, I never stopped. Fuck, I don’t ever want anyone else. No one, just you.”
“Eddie-”
“Give me another chance,” those words made your mouth drop open as you blinked at him a few times, “please. I’ll do anything, just…don’t walk away. I don’t deserve another chance, and I’m an asshole, I know that. But please…one chance is all I’m asking for. I don’t think that this is the end of our story, I think that we’re-”
You caught him by surprise, cutting off his rambling by taking his face in your hands and pressing your lips to his. It was the first time you’d kissed him in so long, but it still felt so right, so magically wonderful. His large, warm hands settled on your waist as he pulled you into him and continued to kiss you deeply. 
Neither of you were willing to break apart until you were both left dizzied and breathless. He pressed his forehead to yours, a smile dancing on his lips as you exchanged soft chuckles. 
“You’re an idiot, Eddie Munson,” you whispered before pressing a kiss to his lips, “but you’re my idiot. And I think you’re right…”
“Hmm?”
“I’ve never thought about anyone else but you either,” that made his entire face light up with happiness, “and I think you and I have a very long story ahead of us.”
“Yeah?” 
“Yes,” you promised, “you’re it for me, rockstar. You always have been and will be.”
“Baby,” he let out a slow breath, feeling like he was able to properly breathe for the first time in a long time. He took your face and peppering it in kisses, causing you to giggle at the ticklish sensation, “let me take you on a date. Let’s go right now.”
“It’s almost one in the morning-” 
“And our favorite diner is open 24/7,” and yeah. You were in love with this fool, “and I don’t know about you but I’m starving. The little bits of fancy food they served were definitely not enough. Whaddaya say?”
“Let’s go,” you moved to slip your heels back on but Eddie stopped. He kneeled down and motioned for you to get on his back; you laughed but did so nonetheless, climbing onto his back as he held onto your heels. You pressed a kiss to his shoulder before closing your eyes and inhaling his familiar scent, “I love you, Eddie.”
“I love you too, baby. So fuckin’ much.”
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I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS
Full HC: MC becomes an author and starts writing memoirs detailing their adventures with their beloved; how do the M6 react? How do they try to help?
The Arcana HCs: When MC writes their love story
Julian
Waaay too invested. Come on. You're writing memoirs about the dramatic, life-changing, whirlwind saving-the-world story that's been your romance? Be still his theatre kid heart
Will ask regularly if you've written anything more and set time aside to read whatever you share with him. Often does so out loud, to whichever patient/clinic assistant/bar patron is nearby
Cannot handle how fondly you describe him
People regularly ask to hear him read the latest installment, just for the sight of the infamous Dr Devorak blushing and stumbling over his words, voice cracking at your loving view of him
This does not stop him from suggesting changes. Specifically, suggesting embellishments. What do you mean the Devil wasn't twenty feet tall? Surely you're misremembering how big he was
Doesn't pressure you to rush your work at all, but is living in perpetual (self-inflicted) purgatory waiting for the story to be finished and to see the book published
Has a spot preemptively saved for it on his library shelf
Coincidentally, half the city plans to preorder it as well
Asra
Their curiosity is killing them, but they value your privacy and creative freedom way too much to ask to see what you're writing
The most he does is offer encouragement, compliments, and help
What you don't see is the sheer level of loving gratitude that they feel about what you're doing. They've accepted your previous memory loss, and have been happy to hold your memories for you
But the fact that you treasure the memories you share with him now so much that you're putting in the hours and effort it takes to preserve them for the future ...
It's enough to overwhelm them, sometimes, which can make them seem distant about the project (though you know them well enough at this point to see that this means they're emotional)
Very good at giving you the emotional support you need for a project like this, especially when you have to relive some of the harder parts of your shared history
Always happy to help you remember the details of how something went. He started remembering things for both of you after you came back, and it makes for some tender conversations
Nadia
Honored. That's mostly what she feels - deeply honored
And a little unsure of how best to support you while you go about your endeavor. Her instinct is to get as involved with it as possible, making sure you have all the resources for success you could need
But she's also aware that this is a very personal thing for you to do, and that the point of it is to write things down from your point of view. This is your project, so she should probably stay out of it ...
Well, offering you her help and "casually" bringing by new supplies every couple days shouldn't hurt
If you didn't have it already, you've got a writing room, strong boundaries around your creative time, only the best ink and parchment, and access to dictionaries and thesauruses galore
Will light up and drop everything if you give her some of what you've written to read over. She's fascinated by your perception of the world (and her) and enjoys learning more about it
She's also extremely knowledgeable about spelling, grammar, and sentence structure, so unless you clarify that you're not asking for feedback you'll get plenty of suggested corrections
Muriel
He's a little ... embarrassed
Don't get him wrong. He loves that you're doing what you're doing, and deep down he'd fight the world to let you keep doing it
But half the time he catches a glimpse of the page you're writing he can see his own name spelled out multiple times in there and it makes him feel much more perceived than he is used to
He feels like what you're doing is almost holy, though
So much of his life was defined by losing his history, his connections, his chance to share memories with a family
And now here you are, putting hours upon hours into documenting the history and family you've built together and found in each other, until your story no longer depends on being alive to tell it
Which is why he'll dote on you while you work, bringing you water and snacks, ink refills and spare pages, making sure your workspace is well-lit and the temperature is comfortable
He wants to honor what you're doing
He's also very interested in reading it, but he's not going to ask. He'll just linger nearby in case you have a question or something ...
Portia
Her first thought is to offer to co-author it
Think about it - you two could write alternating chapters, with the story line switching between your two perspectives!
She's completely understanding if you say no, but she might try to use that to get you to agree to letting her read it as you write it. This is the coolest romance adventure story ever!
Amazing for helping you with the pre-writing creative process. Need someone to bounce ideas off of? Need help structuring your outline or blocking out how much space to give different things?
She's got you. She's quick to notice what boosts your creative flow and will help you get into that groove, whether it's chatting about what you're going to write next or giving you tea and snacks
Her only criticism is that you don't give yourself enough credit in your writing. Otherwise, she loves every word
And by love, that means obsesses. She devours every page you show her and could spend hours telling you why she loves it
It's also a massive boost to her to be reminded that you see her as a main character in your story. It makes her happy cry regularly
Lucio
On the outside, he's playing it cool
Of course you're writing about the adventures you've had together! You two are the best of the best and you've done some seriously awesome things, writing a killer novel about it makes total sense
On the inside, he's scared
He's not an introspective guy. He spends most of his time in the moment, but on the occasions that he has to stop and contemplate himself, he gets insecure a lot faster than he'd like to
And now you - the person who knows him even better than he does - are writing about him. About who he is to you. About what he means to you. About ... who he used to be to you
That's terrifying
He puts off reading anything you offer to show him, and distracts himself from thinking about it when you sit down to write. He's curious to see what you have to say and anxious at the same time
What if you think he hasn't changed that much? What if writing down what he used to be like makes you admire him less?
When he does read it, he almost cries at how loving it is
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