#thinking about it just makes me..hopeless i guess?
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Hey. Just sat down and realized that Endeavor spent 23 years terrorizing his family. Even if you say he was a good person for a good while (which, I mean. He still bought his wife so.) then at least 15 years based on Shouto's age.
15 years spent abusing and terrorizing and hurting and breaking his family and. Nothing. No consequence. He got everything he wanted, being Number 1. He's still a good person in the eyes of everyone. His family are still around him. He is still popular and liked and rich and. The only hitch there is his own son (whom he caused the death of). But that son is considered 'insane' by everyone so no one even deigns to actually listen to him so what's the point? Endeavor got everything he wanted.
Just thinking about it.. it doesn't make me angry per se, but just empty I guess. 15 years. And he just got off scot free.
23 years or 15, does it really matter?
#thinking about it just makes me..hopeless i guess?#idk how to explain it#but it feels like a weight on my heart#i dont think this post accurately expresses how i feel but whatever#anti endeavor#anti enji todoroki#anti todoroki enji#endeavor bashing#look if youre going to defend him dont even bc im not gonna listen to you anyway#bnha critical#mha critical#i laid in bed and thought 23 years. 23 years. what the hell#its just..so unfair
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brothers, sisters, i literally want to turn myself inside out like those octopus plushies like...
i am SO tired
more and more i feel like i'm not even living anymore. i don't even have a sense of time anymore. my brain is either rotating like a turd in aerated water, attached to nothing, or sticks to the most random tasks like a fridge magnet i have no control over
my life feels like that window of time between waking up and 2pm when you have an appointment scheduled and can't do anything. literally waiting for i have absolutely no clue what. waiting for things to return to normal? to feel like myself? idk man. send help
#life#i have therapy tomorrow and i think i'm freaking out a little#last session was in the middle of my proverbial penthouse collapsing#and it just made it worse because i left feeling sort of hopeless?#i'm doing my best trying to manage my own expectations but it's like.. i've been waiting so long to even get there#and i feel like we're making very little progress#so i'm uh... como se dice... a bit scared#because therapy is about the only thing i have going on in terms of trying to crawl out of this hole#and i'm scared that shit's gonna collapse and then i do what?? yaknow#i'd kill to be mid-july mel sipping on my iced drink looking back at all these posts of me whining and going 'damn that was wild lol'#anyway... gonna watch a funny video on the tube to calm down i guess ✌️😗
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My fascination with caretaking and whump definitely spawned from the fact that I’ve always had terrible health and constantly daydream that one day I’ll find a sweetheart that doesn’t mind that I’m far from the manliest thing in the world and will take such good care of me…
Like oh, you care about me so much that you’ll remind me to bundle up and wear a jacket today because it’s cold as hell?
You care about me so much that you ask me if I’ve eaten or drank enough water today because you know I’m not the best with this sort of thing?
You care about me so much that you tell me to relax, that I’ve worked hard enough today and should get some rest because you know I suck at taking care of myself despite knowing how fragile my health is?
We will have a spring wedding~ 🌸
#just being a hopeless romantic over here#you have no idea how much i need this#I’m a simple man#this is all it takes to make me swoon#absolutely melt#and guess what? I’ll do the same for them#my heart pounds just thinking about this#it’s kinda sad and I’m worried I’ll never find the one#yes I am that kiss it better type
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talks about my own damn post in your inbox i guess but i think a good part of the bros' trusting peppino is like. pizzahead can so easily buy out or win over basically anyone who stands against him and peppino is like the ONE guy they knew for sure that wasn't gonna happen with. he might not have cared/known about their plight, but he also didn't seem to have any ulterior motives that would make their lives more hell if he got the treasures, so that was...really as much as they could ask for given the circumstances
I like the idea of this 🤔 Like maybe there were other people theyve seen immediately take the money, like randos but also some of the bosses. So their only hope was someone who wasnt going to be talked or bribed into leaving this tower alone. I can see ph still trying to buy his way into peppinos restaurant, even towards the end…like ouuuh…fat and rude italian man…i dont HAVE to explode this shop, i can just buy it 🥺🥺🥺 please let me buy it 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 pwease…..🥺 and peppino is so fucking determined to just smash everything into oblivion that that simply isnt an acceptable offer. Get ur ass beat. That is the only acceptable offer. And u know what? John will definitely put the small amount of faith he has in this man bc of it.
#answered#chattin#peppino#pillar bros#my thots are like…#gerome has loads more faith and optimism#and whatever hangups he had about peppino is immediately thrown away by the end of the first stage#whereas. i think of john w very little hope. afterall HE is the person falling apart at the seams. not gerome#and he would be a little offput that someone supposedly here to ‘save’ him is in it for his own reasons (reminds him of ph)#hes a lot more hopeful by the vigilante fight#and hes more or less patiently waiting for everything to come down by the final floor#(as opposed to waiting around; extremely hopeless and aimless)#and it is just so funny to me to have peppino be a hero in ANY way#he doesnt think of himself as one; and john certainly doesnt think of him as one#but he is exactly what they needed; a middle aged man swimmin in so much debt#that they would risk going into this fucking tower and kill themselves bc they only have one thing to lose#and its this fucking shop ph is threatening to obliterate#john just sittin there like. huh. i guess it makes sense. who else would be stupid enough to come here??#‘pizzahead.’ ‘well u are not wrong about that’
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glad to see that d3 vid made it to you as well because ohmigosh... i've watched it like 6 times already and it's still just as wild and good as the first time. like the way they all had an answer?? imagining them sitting around having conversations about who they'd like to marry on the team - not to mention the way babies were mentioned more than once. these kids are/have been on tumblr and ao3, they know what's up lol
(also side note one of the guys who said mason, he said it was bc mason was a good cuddler which sent me too - so you guys have cuddled. regularly. like WOW.) not even gonna talk about the one who picked his brother though wanting someone to do your taxes is so real
rotating "hopeless romantic + old school" in my mind, like what does that even mean?? flowers and chocolates and kissing you goodnight at your dorm room? does he pull out a chair for you before you sit down? idk, it was such a sweet and genuine answer
tldr i love them all and can we get more teams doing this please? i've never paid attention to d3 in my life but suddenly i need to know more
- @bondedpairs
every time i watch the video i just start laughing so hard, it brings me so much joy and i cannot thank kasper moregraceful enough for bringing it into all of our lives 🥺 *
AND now i get to pitch that i think everybody should watch more college/local hockey to have that type of joy all the time!!! tickets are usually pretty decently priced, you get your narratives right in front of you (my notes app has some. thoughts) and you get the same emotional attachment and watch your guys develop throughout their careers!!! a lot of the time you can find really fun social media for college teams in particularly because of student media programs but if you are not already an ahl watcher: may i recommend stalking their youtube channels. lehigh valley phantoms spelling bee videos are one of my favorite things in the entire world and the milwaukee ads have a lot of fun content too!!
#it’s called having an emotional support ahl fourth liner for a REASON#and the reasons are a multitude#how are you cole bardreau. i love you baby we can get hors d’oeuvres with dinner#hi bestieeeee 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#anyway lol you caught me after going to said local hockey team and watching them smash god’s favorites 8-3 so i am evangelizing#did i watch them trip and slip slip around the ice yes was it so much fun also yes.#i love my wingies to death and my big teams but there’s also something super nice about being able to go to a game in person (and also saw#a post from the grizzlies [ten out of ten team you should follow them!!! they did a video like this asking who people’s valentines would be#it’s on my blog tagged with the utah grizzlies i think] with one of my guys who just signed there and i was like 🥺🥺 so. in the same vein as#me checking out a book abt minor league baseball that’s gonna break my heart i get really romantic abt semi-pro/pro/college hockey leagues#liv in the replies#ok now to what you actually asked which was like. RPF and to that i say: agreed and i was gonna look up Bryson and the team roster because#i am here for the goalie romanticism plot. i at all times think you should romance your goalie your goalies should be wined and dined#*UPDATE FOR EVERYONE I JUST GOOGLED THE ROSTER AND DO YOU REMEMBER HOW I WASN’T SURE HOW TO SPELL S(H)(E)A(W)N??? YEAH GUESS. G U E S S#I JUST LAUGHED SO HARD TEA CAME OUT OF MY NOSE I CAN’T BREATHE NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME FOR THIS. TRYING NOT TO WHEEZE &FAILING LIKE#SHJON. HIS NAME IS SPELLED SHJON.#also mason does not in fact have a roster photo. rip they were like actually… that’s our polygamous housewife… also mason already KNOWING#the joey voyles sugar daddy checks out btw. ALSO CANNOT BELIEVE THAT SETH SAID HE WANTED SHJON TO DO HIS FINANCES & SHJON’S THE ONE SAYING#YEAH I’D GET A SUGAR DADDY AND THEN THE GOALIE CALLS HIM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC??? WHERE IS *THAT* FIC WITH THE GOALIE SUGAR DADDY#OK DIJON MUSTARD BOY#anyway i want to daydream in the hopeless romantic + old school world with you… chin in hands kicking my feet giggling… making the goalie#take a magazine quiz with us to see if his crush (shjon) likes him back. mcelroy baby so many other guys would marry you didn’t you hear#AND NOW I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRELATION BETWEEN POSITION AND NAMING UR LINEMATES VS YOUR GOALIEEEE#gonna compile a list of facts about Mason that are just: WAIT ALSO NO ONE ELSE KNOWS THIS THERE ARE TWO (2) MASONS ON THE TEAM!!! i assume#they’re all talking about holler but it should be noted. anyway. Mason: can cuddle good personality would make 7ft babies can color good#colorado mesa university
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My ass was trying so hard not to jump up and down with glee playing yttd with my sister and getting to the shin reveal I was like MY GUY MY FUNNY LAD MY SILLY RABBIT
#the klock keeps ticking#yttd#its like i cant get ahead of myself when talking about him cuz theres still a lot not revealed by the end of ch2 but STILLLL#i was keeping my opinions on characters pretty neutral this whole playthrough though my bias towards gin and kai was very apparent lol#and i did start screaming in agony reliving my worst nightmare joe dying#i dont think my sister was nearly as torn up about it as i was though like god ill still never get over it#the first time i played i actually gross sobbed like maybe i was just sleep deprived but i was inconsolable literally never cried that hard#but yeah we did the second main game today and i was like#‘not trying to persuade your vote but heres one million reasons why we should let shin live ahaha’#i dont think she was very happy with her vote aldnks#but yeah i really am gonna be sooo annoying next time we play im literally gonna bring pages of shin analysis with me that i can gush about#it is an interesting thing this character cuz to me like everything about him is so clear like even from the beginning i just didnt buy#the idea that he was genuinely an asshole i knew there had to have been something more going on#and idk if ive made it clear guys…but hes exactly like me guys hes just like me fr#his story hits so hard it feels like my own self insert which is weird cuz obviously thats not true#but like i feel like its either you get it or you dont and if you dont understand exactly what this character feels cuz you feel it yourself#i feel like so much of him just wont make any sense to you#maybe im just being pretentious idk but like if you cant relate to his abuse and just#very blatant bpd then I feel like youll just judge him on how good or badof a person he is#like it just doesnt feel like itd hit in the same way like when i see this character talking about being hopeless and the way his trauma#makes him act irrationally like god it just clicks so hard it makes so much sense and i can physically feel it through the screen#I MAY BE FERAL ABOUT THIS CHARACTER TO AN ABSURD DEGREE SHHH#basically what im getting at is i feel if i dont over explain everything about this character to other people i fear they just Wont Get It#and that they will be judgmental which idk i guess makes me defensive#anyway yeah i just enjoy getting to re experience the spiral this guy has given me and i will be thinking about it a lot tonight
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Ok i really hope this is my period finally approaching because i don't want This depressive state to be my normal everyday state now
#come on#it's been 80 days#i kinda wanted to go another 30 days without it so i wouldn't have to go through the pain of cleaning and sterilizing my cup#here again#but I've been feeling the pinching pain announcing it for a few days now so i guess it's gonna happen soon#(although experience shows it can take up to 2 weeks from then on but oh well#i bet it comes next week when i am away over the weekend again to make everything as insufferable as possible)#and idk it might be me thinking about my life a bit too much which causes this deep dread and hopelessness#but i sure hope there's some relation to some hormonal stuff that makes it wayyy worse than it would normally be#because boy oh boy. not fun#or maybe I'm just regular depressed and this Is in fact my normal state#guess we'll find out in hopefully a few days (or weeks)#void screams
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scrolling through instagram and it's making me want to die
#i know instagram doesn't represent ppls real lives#but that doesnt change the fact that i don't have many friends who care about me#and almost everyone my year is graduating and celebrating#i am so fucking lonely. i don't think any of my school friends miss me#24 days self-harm free but i might say fuck it and relapse tonight#why though? i guess i just need some way to express how im feeling inside. or maybe it's to punish myself or because im feeling worthless#it's been over a year now since i first reached out to professionals for help for this depressive episode#over a year and im still as lost as ever. i know im doing so much better than i was but i still feel so awful every single day#i feel like i still need to be doing a lot better before i can go back to school#i feel so stuck and hopeless. i know I've made so much progress but i don't feel as if ill be able to make anymore progress#i feel like I've hit a wall and ive tried everything#my therapist told me to just keep eating sleeping and getting movement in everyday and be patient#ive been going on walks every day for like 2 weeks now and i dont feel any difference#seeing my psychiatrist wednesday and im hoping she will have an idea of what to do#i hope it's not just slightly adjusting my meds or even just trying a different antidepressant (not many left i haven't tried)#i also worry that im not bad enough for more intensive treatments like ECT or ketamine#if she tells me that i just need more therapy or another group i might just fucking end it#idk like i kinda feel like im fine and there's nothing wrong with me but at the same time i always am feeling so fucking depressed#i have had so much improvement but honestly part of me wishes i was still actively suicidal#idk what to do
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Idk man every morning I wake up to take out and feed and hang out with my dog, and every morning at the same time my roommate wakes up to make tea, and I used to go straight back to my room to keep sleeping and she used to wake up past noon or take her tea back to her room, but now every morning I sit on the couch with the dog and she sits at the table with her tea and we talk about our day, if we're going to work and what we're going to do, what we're reading, and it's amazing. It's a little bit of love I think. At least for me. And I wouldn't mind if, every morning for forever, I could sit on the couch with my dog and she would sit at the table with her tea, and we could talk about our days.
#me? fucked up bad with this crush? its more likely than you think#but the hopeless romantic side of me says... that they used to go back to their room with their tea and we had minimal conversation#or sleep in hella late because they work and stay awake hella late#but now. theyve been waking up st the same time as me. and making their tea. and making conversation#today we talked about my parents and books we like and her manuscript#i really fucking like her#but in six months she's leaving for grad school across the country and i will likely never see her again#and i havent really dealt with that yet#i guess for now im just enjoying our morning conversations
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💜
#I think I’m like almost mourning for the six year ago version of me that had no where to go and felt so hopeless#which seems kind of silly because I’m about to have a place I belong for the first time and no one can kick me out of as long as I pay my#mortgage and everything so I should just be excited and I am excited but it’s also like it feels like if you broke a bone and it didn’t#quite heal and every so often it hurts like it was just broken if that makes sense?#like I’m happy about my home and I’m looking forward to it but hurts a little bit too and I don’t know if I can fully explain why#other than that I guess it reminds me of being homeless even if it’s joyful that I’ve bought a home now#i’m just talking to myself#it’s weird#how is there such a population of people that have been homeless in the world but so little talk about it and how it stays with you
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i have yes! for some reason whenever i get messages i want to respond but i never do! i fear i may be scared of possible commitment or something because i’ve been like this for a while when i used to respond to every single message lol
maybe, it could also be that it gets boring to entertain pointless conversations with people you're not really interested in 🤷♀️ the fear of commitment is also valid tho, especially in this day and age with less and less people valuing loyalty to one person...
#idk i found it exciting at first having a bunch of messages lol#but eventually it becomes less about them being interested in you and more about desperation and boredom 🙃#so i feel you. i also stopped responding after a while it got repetitive and superficial and honestly just draining#you're probably craving something meaningful and more on a friendship level than just vain attraction#which makes dating apps a bad advice aha but i mean ya never know i guess#my friend has been with her bf for a year now and they met on a dating app and he seems to be the one so 🤷♀️#maybe you could just keep looking for a message you actually *want* to respond to - or leave altogether if it's not working for you#tbh i deleted all my accounts and don't think i'm ever going back#again it's not for everyone - some people seem to find their soulmate there and others end up leaving more hopeless than before 🙃#either way let me know how this progresses#answered#🫶🏻
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ok apparently 30 tags is the limit on tumblr and I'm putting it here because I couldn't put it in the tags
for my own curiosity, because my tragedy enjoying boggles the minds of a bunch of my irl social circle.
#poll is over but screw it i wanna rant#4 for me i think???#i don't feel like exposing my tastes too much but i usually need a good ending. or if not straight up good i need hope#like the few stories that made me unable to think about anything else for a while were all really dark#(by my standards i'm sure there's darker stuff out there)#with an ambiguous ending. but like. i prefer some closure. one book i read#it was very good and very famous but i will NOT name it here#had hopelessness as the whole point (specifically going against a system as an individual)#and it made me feel really bad for several weeks. like. i'm not mad about it. i think it was the point to make people uncomfortable#but also i kinda... need to be able to function in day to day life yknow. i can't be just thinking about amazing stories that broke me#i like angst. i'm finally in my emo phase. i want the characters to suffer but also win in the end. and if the suffering is really bad#that's probably the kind of dark fiction i enjoy. they don't even always have to win. i like it when something is basically#lost before you even start fighting#i guess it's about hope again (and having that hope crushed at the end)#but like. i still would prefer if it didn't end there and things slowly got better again#like i would say evangelion is pretty dark. but its ultimate ending was Good (I think. based on what i remember). things got Better#and then. sigh. euphoria is DEFINITELY dark and it ends just after they escape. the world isn't welcoming. they don't#have anywhere to go. but they are out and together. that's honestly one of my favorite endings ever#one of the reasons why i can't shut up about the gamd#game*#and my current favorite fanfiction has many dark elements but overall seems to be following the source material's progression#as in. things are Bad but they're not bad enough to stop trying. also it's set between two of the games#so like... no matter what happens i know how things end. which is comforting#and i guess i have to atleast mention this#kingdom hearts is light (ahahaahhahh) but also... it has a lot of fluff for sure. and i don't really like fluff for the sake of fluff#i honestly really enjoy it only in fanfics for stories where the characters don't get a break and you just want them to be happy for once#one of my guilty pleasures in fanfic is high school aus (i blame snk junior high for that)#it's stupid and the stakes are low but the characters are happy. and sometimes i need stuff like that#so like YEAH i guess i still prefer lighter stuff#but some dark stories are good. and others are good but i can't read them for my sanity's sake
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(piano) keys to your heart | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem fan reader
who knew the fan stages could be so romantic?
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
f1
liked by liamlawson30, yukitsunoda0511 and 1,340,667 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, lewishamilton, oscarpiastri & landonorris
f1: it's always chaos at the fan stages
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user1: what is in the air today?
user2: i think it's so early in the season that they haven't lost the will to live yet
user3: there's still light in their eyes LMAO
lewishamilton: let me just say... that was an experience
georgerussell63: i wish all media commitments were this entertaining
lewishamilton: we can only pray
user4: wait i'm so lost what happened at this damn fan stage
user5: there was a girl with a baby toy piano who played one of charles' songs for him 😭
user6: and he was SO IMPRESSED
user7: he was impressed? I WAS IMPRESSED like it sounded so good and it has five keys that make ANIMAL NOISES
user8: aniMAL NOISES???
pierregasly: i think i watched that man fall in love in real time
charles_leclerc: are you not also enchanted?
pierregasly: by animal sounds? no?
charles_leclerc: so rude! you wouldn't know real art even if it hit you in the face
pierregasly: nuh uh !!!
user9: girlies i do think he might be in love what is going on?
user10: has he even spoken to her other than through hundreds of people on a microphone?
charles_leclerc: can a hopeless romantic live ?
user11: yeah it's terminal people
user12: well i'm not gonna lie if someone learnt my music on such an esteemed instrument i'd also be flattered
charles_leclerc: EXACTLYYYYYY
yourusername
liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc and 12,309 others
yourusername: got to play a pretty boy piano this weekend, what about you?
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user15: PIANO WOMAN MY QUEEN
user16: you have a real piano?
yourusername: where do you think i honed my skills in order to play it on such a crazy model
yourbff: MAMA THERE'S 12,000 PEOPLE ON YOUR POST 💜
yourusername: act natural
yourbff: how can i ACT NATURAL BABE THE HOTTEST MAN IN THE WORLD IS IN YOUR LIKES
yourusername: as he should be
yourbff: i know for a fact you are not that chill rn ... i can hear you screaming from my house
yourusername: *harmonising
user17: we're all stalkers for being here but i'm pleasantly surprised with how funny she is
yourusername: damn ask me out on a date first
user18: so you are single queen?
yourusername: chronically so ...
charles_leclerc: i FOUND YOU
pierregasly: * i found you
oscarpiastri: not that i want the title of chief stalker but it was me (you have very niche mutual friends with my sisters)
yourusername: OMG OSCAR !!!!!!!!!!!! (tell hattie i said hi and take me to the next kpop concert)
charles_leclerc: so fuck me i guess
yourusername: i would love to fuck you, yes
charles_leclerc: oh hehehehehehehehehe
yourbff: for a man who is the sexiest in every room he's in, you're embarrassingly easy to please
lewishamilton: he's not the sexiest in every room, that is lewis hamilton erasure
yourbff: WHAT THE FUCK
user19: so is like all of the current f1 grid here?
maxverstappen1: i'm just here to watch charles embarrass himself
danielricciardo: i am retired but i must be interested in the exploits of my countrymen
pierregasly
liked by yukitsunoda0511, charles_leclerc and 885,489 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & kika.c.gomez
pierregasly: he's making us take a flight on our one week off
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user20: deadass if they're going to australia
user21: these are levels that i would actually completely expect from charles
user22: pierre and kika are better than me because a flight to AUSTRALIA oh no baby
maxverstappen1: well this is an update that SOMEONE (i'm talking about you pierre) forgot to put in the group chat
pierregasly: i'm kind of in the middle of a flight and sat to the nosiest motherfucker in the world
charles_leclerc: what group chat?
georgerussell63: nothing!
oscarpiastri: nothing!
landonorris: nothing!
alexalbon: nothing!
maxverstappen1: we're laughing about how down bad you are behind your back 👍
charles_leclerc: thanks max!
charles_leclerc: WAIT?
user23: oh charles how can you be so smart yet so dumb
user24: all brain power goes to f1 and piano
user25: and piano girl now apparently
yourbff: you're not being serious ....
pierregasly: deadly
yourusername: this is so charming
yourbff: this man is flying 24 HOURS TO SEE HER ???
yourusername: i'm not appreciating your tone rn
yourbff: oh no you're more than worth it pookie but DAMN the air miles
charles_leclerc: i chartered a private jet :D
yourbff: you're crazy
yourusername: i'm in love with you?
user26: guys i think they're just as insane as each other
user27: a match made in heaven i fear
liked by charles_leclerc & yourusername
yourusername
liked by yourbff, charles_leclerc and 41,298 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, pierregasly & kika.c.gomez
yourusername: guys there's a cute guy at my door (and a guy with a bad hairline but he doesn't matter (i love you kika))
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user29: chat - it's never been so over i fear
user30: we've lost him
yourusername: :P
user31: she's so unserious i love her
user32: i know every other wag wants to be this in our face so i respect it
charles_leclerc: i'm very happy to be the cute guy at your door
yourusername: you best be :)
charles_leclerc: i'm here to swipe you off your feet
yourusername: believe me you won't have to do much
charles_leclerc: i saw you have a proper piano ...
yourusername: you don't want to serenade me with my animal noise piano ???
user33: so like this is real? how did this actually happen?
user34: like surely they had met before this - it can't be the animal sounds piano of monaco that did it
user35: have you ever considered that maybe someone doing something as ridiculous but as time consuming as that is incredibly endearing
charles_leclerc: my love language is acts of service :)
pierregasly: i am sat in your living room and you're blasting my hairline on instagram?
yourusername: yes!
pierregasly: you know what? you two are perfect for each other
yourusername: i know :D
user36: oh to be a girl who has charles flying across the world for her
user37: if we get a video of them playing piano it might just kill me
maxverstappen1: interesting.... very interesting....
yourusername: can i help you?
maxverstappen1: just observing ....
yourusername: you're observing very loudly
charles_leclerc
liked by maxverstappen1, alexalbon and 1,894,300 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: obviously we had to take the real piano for a drive
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user38: killing myself <3
user39: the most rational reaction
user40: THEY'RE SO FUCKING CUTE (i want to die)
yourusername: as if you needed to be any more handsome
charles_leclerc: i gotta match your beauty some how
yourusername: SHUT THE FUCK UP
yourusername: YOU'RE SO CUTE
yourusername: and also objectively the most beautiful man in the world
lewishamilton: once again, stop lying to him please 🙏
yourusername: okay queen..... whatever you wanna hear
user41: lewis not being in the GC but always being here to stunt on charles is killing me
user42: getting in the psychological warfare for next year
yourusername: lewis hamilton psychological warfare (immovable object) vs sleep deprived y/n y/ln (unstoppable force)
lewishamilton: YOU'VE KNOWN HIM MAX A WEEK ???
yourusername: there's no set timeline for love girlypop
maxverstappen1: piano? this is boring
yourusername: i would post me treating him the way he should but that would violate instagram's guidelines sorry!
charles_leclerc: no !!! i don't wanna share you with anyone
maxverstappen1: i don't wanna see all that anyway
charles_leclerc: don't lie buddy
yourusername: you're just intimidated :P
user43: couples who bully max together, stay together
maxverstappen1: it seems that way ...
yourusername: omg we're so couple goals
charles_leclerc: we so are <3333
user44: CONFIRMATION???
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yourusername: guess i'm a recording artist now? oh and i have a bf, he's there i guess?
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user46: oh they want me dead
user47: ignoring this for my mental health
user48: they're 😭 so 😭 cute 😭 i'm 😭 so 😭 happy 😭 for 😭 you
charles_leclerc: no one i'd rather work with!! we've been in a whirlwinf but i'm glad i have you
yourusername: you have had the (piano) keys to my heart long before we met
charles_leclerc: i still had to charm you though ;)
yourusername: oh i was smitten straight away i was just trying to play it cool
pierregasly: you weren't very convincing
yourusername: i was ???
yourbff: the day you found out he was flying over to aus you did 20,000 steps just pacing in the living room
yourusername: well...
charles_leclerc: i found it very cute no worries
user49: they're so hilariously embarrassing for each other it's so cute
user50: i mean they're both insanely attractive so yeah i'd be just as nervous around them
user51: everyone is just hating on their whimsical love
arthurleclerc: so you're official and you've still not met us 🤨🤨🤨
yourusername: well............. i'm in aus what do you want me to do about that?
arthurleclerc: charles irresponsibly uses a private jet - i expect to see you for dinner this weekend ! (that's an order from maman)
yourusername: CHARLES I CAN'T LET YOUR MUM DOWN
maxverstappen1: does this mean i might get air max back in europe?
yourusername: you've been hating this whole time but it was YOUR JET THAT GOT CHARLES HERE?
maxverstappen1: and what?
yourusername: i'm just observing, loudly
charles_leclerc: he loves me really <3
yourusername: but not too much 🤨
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charles_leclerc: i am never complaining about media again
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user52: so when i do an interpretative dance as a cat to seduce max then what?
maxverstappen1: if you dare do that anywhere near me i am getting a restraining order
user52: anyone tell you you're no fun?
maxverstappen1: all the time, i'm still not going to fuck someone dressed as a cat 👍
yourusername: loving you is the easiest thing in the world
charles_leclerc: the most natural thing in my life - we were made for each other
yourusername: forged by the gods for each other and they decided to give me the prettiest boy in the world
yourusername: @lewishamilton i dare you to say otherwise
charles_leclerc: she's so protective 🤭🤭🤭
roscoelovescoco: ...
yourusername: i'll still fight your dog i have no shame when it comes to defending my man
user53: see this ^^ is appropriate action for wags i too would fight a bull dog to defend charles' honour
yourusername: it's the least i can do
charles_leclerc: i will literally run someone over with my ferrari
yourusername: considering i've seen your road parking - that's a real threat, so romantic
pierregasly: so i really am stuck with this for the rest of my life?
yourusername: it doesn't have to be a long life
pierregasly: you're breaking up with charles ???
yourusername: i'm threatening your life 👍
pierregasly: oh!
charles_leclerc: so romantic
user54: childhood friends being thrown under the bus? this is real romance
user55: and this all started with an animal sounds piano?
yourusername: i owe my baby cousin everything
charles_leclerc: does she want a ferrari?
fin.
note: HAPPY CHARLES LECLERC BIRTHDAY DAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc smau
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I may never draw again ahahaha it is fine *despair*
#the klock keeps ticking#hmmmm god i am just saur hopeless 😞#i cant even make anything simple without tearing it apart#and its really annoying how you gotta like draw every day or else youll be out of practice#which means that when you do finally draw again itll be shit. which is frustrating and makes you not wanna draw#so then you get even worse#i guess its kinda been like this for over a year honestly like im severely lacking and it feels like shit#cuz i have nothing to show like its all old and bad its not what i want it to be#i just wanna draw my damn blorbos but i cant even draw a face anymore without nitpicking everything about it#and just thinking ‘its not good enough im too mediocre no one should see this’#im kinda withholding everything from myself because of this like im so hard on myself i cant move so i just do nothing#and everything just stays in my head at all times and if you wanna know anything about me or what i love#youll have nothing to see cuz im too damn repressed and insecure to do things and be a person#sighhhhhh
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[song unrelated. it was just what was playing when i got in my car]
today i learned why theres violence prevention information on the back of everyones work id. Something about the environment made my immediate reaction to over hearing someone calling me special to go fucking feral. Which is funny because it was, like, a group of men and im 5'7". Would not have gone down well. not that i would ever actually resort to violence like that, i was just surprised that that was my brains immediate reaction to the issue.
#and like. UHG say it so my face!#but they wouldnt#because that would be rude. like if you asked them thats what yhey would say#because neurotypicals make NO SENSE#like do you SEE#and special isnt. that bad. i fucking guess but UHG i was probably just over thinking it#special is like. at least if someone calls you the r word theres a chance that they still see you as a fully fledged human being#they just are assholes or have like. a fucked sense of humor or something#but special is like 'youve been demoted to something lesser. your so lesser that im not even going to bither trying to offend you'#but i talked it out in my head and it was near the end of my shift.#+ adding on the truman show to everything takes so much energy and makes everything make no fucking sense#its not even frustrating its like. i just feel fucking hopeless lol#ANYWAYS#oh my god and he moved his speaker like RIGHT next to me#and it almost definitely was not about me but im sure that played into the whole 'im going to trample you to death with my hooves' feeling#Spotify
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guess whose therapist thinks she could benefit from inpatient treatment
#got really depressed and a bit suicidal during my session today#im not actively suicidal rn but i feel so hopeless and i just want to give up resulting in some suicidal thoughts#the thoughts of hurting myself are getting louder and more overwhelming#so im not at a point rn where i think i need inpatient but im worried about getting worse#im going to nyc this weekend and seeing 2 shows and some of my favorite broadway actors but i do not feel excited#i want to feel excited but i just dont. i should be excited. if this doesn't make me feel something#then i doubt anything will.#reminds me of late may/early june when i wasnt excited for my birthday or the taylor swift concert because i did not want to live anymore#im worried that this is a warning sign. i feel like ive made so much progress with treatment in the last 10 months#but i feel like i haven't made enough progress and i feel like ive hit a wall and there's no improvement to be made#because I've tried like everything. i feel so hopeless. ive been in treatment for almost a year.#even inpatient i doubt would help me. like ive been there and done that. i spent nearly 20 days in inpatient last summer#only benefit would be seeing my doctor sooner but that's assuming i could even get a bed in the 11 person unit she works inpatient at#what benefit would seeing my doctor even do? we've tried almost everything and im on the max dose of most my meds#idk what to do#i feel like im running out of options. the only depression treatments i havent tried are ketamine and ect#i guess my options are ketamine ect suicide or continuing feeling how i feel now but i dont know how much longer i can live like this
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