#think I got 6 this year alone
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ofc I had to end 2024 with new piercings
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Every once in a while something will happen in naruto that just makes me go,,, Kishimoto,,, have you ever actually interacted with a child,,,
#11 year old Itachi: I must stop this coup and prevent war from overtaking my home. I will risk my life for this.#Me like a week ago watching a group of 10ish year olds try to build up the courage amongst themselves to ask if they can have a second egg:#Kakashi: Graduating from the ninja academy at 6#Me thinking back to the number of times I woke up with my 6 - 8 year old sibling sleeping beside me because they got scared: HM#Naruto and Sasuke: Living by themselves at age like 6/7#Me literally yesterday having to explain that No We Will Not Be Wandering Into The Woods At 11pm Bc You Heard A Dog (/coyote most likely)#Ik these characters are more traumatized shaped by the world around them it's fantasy etc etc#But every time someone's like. Kakashi graduated at 6...itachi at 7...how badass...I'm like...#Those kids couldn't read let alone write not a chance#Naruto is lucky he's durable he 100% tried getting bread out of the toaster with a fork#Don't take this too seriously I'm just saying shit rn
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i keep getting tiktoks of these younger gen z kids referencing a time they did something relating to fandom in public and now they're embarrassed by it and everytime i see one i sit there thinking over all of middle and high school and having genuinely 0 moments that i feel embarrassed by, like i definitely did a lot of shit these kids would be embarrassed by but i think these are all just really fucking funny
also photographic evidence of the kinda kid i was. these are from 2014/15 when i was in 8th grade
-desolation row one shot(still on wattpad gerard way/reader smut)
-twerk it on (mcr crack fanfic no longer on wattpad but i have another fic in my library called twerking in taco bell which definitely ALSO used for my reading log)
-frank iero must die(a serial killer/assassin frerard fic, still on wattpad)
-hair (really vague maybe a phanfic? nowhere in my wattpad library rip)
my binder i used in 7th grade i had a blue one that looked pretty similar to this for 8th grade but idk where it went, also the parts i scribbled out are my full legal name i had written on it. i wrote it normally and then the big spot is where i wrote my name REALLY BIG in elysian code from the vladimir tod books. also the lines are from when i used an exacto knife to cut up some papers and forgot that my binder was underneath
in conclusion yall can now see why im so shameless about talking about shigaraki the way i do
#base line i started sobbing IN THE MIDDLE OF MATH CLASS and had my phone taken away bc i was watching the mv for the ghost of you by mcr#i went to school with cat whiskers#me and my bsf made a presentation about an imaginary trip to the planet uranus and we filled it with so many memes and butt puns she started#laughing so hard she couldn't breathe and i had to do the entire presentation alone and we got a standing ovation#my 8th grade science teacher hated us#another time same class we had an assignment where we had to make a bunch of words with the periodic table and we did shrek and lucifer one#after another and when we turned it in our teacher read it and immediately told us to leave💀💀#same class again different friend we saw NA on the periodic table and started singing nanana by mcr and got sent out of class bc we started#laughing so hard we couldn't breathe#high school i would eddie munson on the lunch tables#found that aspect of eddie so relatable#filmed youtube videos at my old hs that STILL EXIST ON MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL#id honestly have them up for anyone to see but my old bsf found them extremely embarrassing and she thinks i deleted them#i used to go to school with a whole library in my backpack like the entire pjo/hoo series of unfortunate events harry potter etc#my backpack had a bunch of doodles on it and it said battaco big asf and it was an inside joke with my friends for years bc of it#i also used to go to school dressed as frank iero/gerard way/etc#pete wentz eyeliner#larped with the anime club in this little corner outside of the library bc it had a bunch of trees and a 6 ft long stick that we took turns#holding and screaming YOU SHALL NOT PASS‼️‼️#the middle school book club had movies days on fridays and when people tried to vote to watch the lighting thief movie i stood on my chair#and spent so long bitching about how bad it was that we had to do the movie the next monday bc people needed to go home and the librarian#could not stop my righteous fury#a teacher assaulted me trying to get me to stand for the flag so i dead weight dropped on top of him and then ran around the class to stay#away(real hard to do in a small music classroom) and when i got tired of that i beat him up a little and i didnt get in trouble bc he was#really embarrassed i got the drop on him(bc i had tiddies)#that man hated me for being trans#really got mad at me when the pledge started after that and id get up and salute while singing welcome to the black parade#was also genuinely bad at soccer that my teacher sent me off to other teachers when our class did soccer bc the only time i ever got the#ball i kicked it into the wrong goal#i got more stories but i ran out of tags :(
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screaming into the void <3
#my best friends boyfriend (who i’ve also been friends with for years) is just. not himself rn#we think it’s a manic episode but we don’t really know but it’s. terrifying lowkey#he thinks he’s genuinely jesus and that he’s conquered time and that he and my bsf are adam and eve#he’s been sending my bsf liek hundreds of texts per day since tuesday but it got really really bad and incoherent yesterday#and i woke up this morning to see multiple texts from gcs he created w me in them#and he keeps being like ‘because it’s 6:20 this is true’ and like ‘i know that at 9 pm everyone is gonna understand’#and he’ll text like 5 times then send a sc of what he just texted like that proves something but it’s all nonsense#i’m just really really concerned cause he really needs help but i don’t know how to ensure that happens cause he’s 19. not a minor#he’s just. not him rn. he’s called my bsf multiple times yesterday when he HATES calling normally#he had his band and his mom over in his apartment yesterday cause my bsf called his mom and h went to his bands show but was visibly not ok#and he saw nothing weird about it even tho he hates having ppl over normally and never without warning#and you can’t get him to see logic because everything you say he just twists around to work for him#to be clear it was not this bad when it started. when it started it seemed like normally maybe slightly out there conclusions he was drawing#but it just got worse and worse like exponential decay and really bad yesterday#he also didn’t sleep at all yesterday night and idk if he slept tonight#i know his mom took his phone at one point but he texted me and gcs w me in it starting at like 6:20 this morning#and my bsf and i and friends are on a trip out of state rn but we’re leaving today and i don’t wanna wake her up until i have to because#this is literally hell for her. but it’s just. scary. i don’t know what to do. i don’t think there’s any good options really for me rn#i want to warn ppl and try to explain he’s Not Him rn so they don’t get concerned but who knows if they’ll understand what i’m trying to say#i know it’s not the end of the world but it really feels like the end of my world as i know it if that makes sense#and my bsf lives with him in an apartment near their college and they just signed the lease for the next year#but she can’t stay there with him alone. not until he gets help. we’re all too scared it’s going in the directon where he thinks it’s better#for ppl to go to the afterlife. which like he never would normally. but he’s Not Him and so like. who knows#he keeps talking about all these different dimensions and how you need to travel to the 7th dimension to understand#my bsf was crying yesterday and she called her mom to explain and she keeps saying that she just wants her jake back it’s really scary#cause he will probably never be the same again. he’ll be similar but different but she wants his comfort but he’s Not Him. and can’t give it#i just. really want this to get better but it’s so hard to see that happening rn
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me (diagnosed with ADHD): *talks about little funny/annoying things my brain does (because of the ADHD)* my mom (not diagnosed with anything): wow that's so funny, the exact same thing happens to me too! i've never heard anyone else describe that. so random that you get that too. genetics, huh? :))
#sure mom. funny. funny coincidence.#this happens every time i see her#it happened like 6 times today alone#meanwhile my dad and my sister are staring at us like 'your brains do WHAT now???'#she doesn't really know much about adhd#i only got diagnosed a few years ago and she wasn't part of that process at all because she was living in another country back then#and like. i've gently mentioned to her before that genetics seem to play a big role in adhd too#and that actually many people get a late diagnosis when their child gets diagnosed#and it's fine. i won't pressure her to look into it more because she's doing well!#i don't think she needs meds or therapy or whatever at this point#but i just feel like it might help with how she sees herself? because it's so deeply engrained into her that she is Not Smart???#because she flunked out of school as a teenager???#due to bad grades#and like. oh i wish i could talk to that girl#things turned out well for her and she's generally a happy person#but still. i know part of her think she's stupid. and i fucking hate that#anyway i mainly just think this is really funny when it happens#adhd#nd
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old people really were raised on the idea that their descendants were just future caretakers for them and never fucking learned to think otherwise
#sorry grandma thinks i'm her therapist again#grandma takes everything i do for her for granted again#grandma overthinks literally every fucking aspect of her life and confuses the fanfic she made up about her relatives for reality again#like she's dead convinced nobody loves her and nobody does anything for her and nobody visits her and yadda yadda yadda#girl i can't be at your house every fucking day. i don't have a car. my mom's got a fucking job.#literally she never voices her god damn needs. she never says ''hey i need help with this'' or ''i'm not well could you do that for me''#we're just supposed to fucking use our telepathic powers we definitely have to Guess what she wants from us#and then when we don't succeed at that Easy Task it's our fault and she's so alone and nobody cares wah wah boohoo#and if you so much as breathe in a way that might maybe possibly indicate that you're a little bit in disagreement with her#or that you could potentially have some form of criticism or advice about her behavior she doubles the fuck down#you tell her ''calm down'' she hears ''SHUT UP NOBODY CARES YOU SHOULD JUST DIE''. those are definitely the same statement.#she fucking begged me to ask my therapist to start seeing her too. fucking 6-7 months later she's like#nooo i don't want to go anymore what's the poiiiiint#GIRL IVE BEEN GOING FOR 6 GOD DAMN YEARS.#IT TOOK ME 5 OF THOSE YEARS TO EVEN JUST -START- GETTING BETTER AND I WAS LESS DEPRESSED THAN YOU#IT'S NOT GONNA MAGIC AWAY IN 7 MONTHS !!!!#I'LL DRAG YOU THERE KICKING AND SCREAMING IF THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES BUT YOU'RE FUCKING GOING#*through gritted teeth* i love and care about you and want you to be well Stop getting in the way of me doing that
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looking back at this year is funny because i was on a whole different plane of emotional vulnerability and disassociation from reality for most of it from the #grief and now i look back and im like why was i so upset over six litmag rejections
#like the rabbit knows how to bury itself got ten rejections alone LOL#to be fair to me these were stretched over a year and i was scared I wouldn’t get a pub this year#also combining that with doing litmag stuff and exposing myself to the wider community gave me a lot of impostor syndrome#which like why was I comparing myself to people 10+ years older than me who have been writing way longer too ???#but like no story of mine got more than 2 rejections and two of them got acceptance on the first sub LOL i think I’ve just been so out of i#and there was no strategy really!!! just luck#I was rly focused on where I submitted too rather than doing big wide scopes to just get published anywhere#which is slower but feels more intentional and better for me#but also I do want to submit a lot more next year which means I will get rejected way more#I never did rejection goals bc those are out of my control but maybe a sub goal?#like i made 9 subs this year lol. 6 rejected 2 accepted 1 withdrawn
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hiii i want to quit my job <3
#.txt#stressed.#i dont like lights and sound. i dont think that way. cannot tell the different lights apart and programming confuses me#also the catwalks in the theatre we used last sem were good and stable and not too high up so hanging lights was fine#like they're heavy as shit and i am: weak. scared of falling. not very tall.#so leaning out to focus them sucked#but it's fine!#except we're in the other theatre now. and the catwalks are fuckinf high and wobbly and i hate WALKING on them let alone carrying a light#and everything got hung for the current show but strike and on i really dont feel comfy up there#but whay the fuck else can i do#also i'm working one show that's moving into tech. and co-SMing two others this sem. and taking a full load of classes.#and originally i was only allowed 6 hrs/wk which was fine that's doable#but i guess bc i didn’t work january i get eleven now#but consider! i don't WANT eleven hours i want to QUIT#but she really wants to schedule me fridays and things keep complicating it ans i don't know how to say i don't want to work Fridays#and i HAVE to make sure she continues to like me bc shes the person to go to for SM shit. shes in charge and seemingly fickle#i'm already workinf mon-wed and one of those days i literally don't have time to get lunch so i'm not eating til 5#but i really should push thru to the end of the year at least. i need an understanding of this facet of things.#shes put in the work to train me i shouldnt leave after one semester.#UGH#hate this im too tired for negotiations over a job i dont even want
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SO THERE'S THIS GREY WARDEN NAMED ALISTAIR...........
#he's growing on me in such a bizarre wat#*way#he gave me frat boy energy at first so i wasn't interested but after the big fight he sort of turned into a wet sad dog#and THAT i like lmao#also the way morrigan is constantly belittling him is so funny to me#but the part that Got Me was when morrigan was like ''arent YOU the senior grey warden? why are we following someone new''#and he was like ''what do you want me to say? that i prefer to follow? because i do.''#that paired with the bow paired with the templar manners paired with the changed by grief motif was an arrow straight thru me#i still prefer cullen. cullen was whipped in ways alistair is not (at least not yet)#and i also havent met zevran yet and i anticipate i will like him (his type of character can be a toss up tho)#but i can't romance cullen in this game so i will settle for alistair! i hope he gets even more desperate :)#kicking my feet cheerfully i love a man that is so in love he makes a fool of himself#im also AT WORK. AND UNABLE TO KEEP PLAYINH#but the good news is i have 6 (SIX) DAYS OFF SOON IN A ROWWWWWW and thats NOT including the holidays#IM SO EXCITEDDDD i havent had that many days off in a row literally 3 years#im thinking about doing something Different. like last time i had 4 days off in a row i went to the movies by myself#(scary at first but i LOVE it now)#so now i might go to a museum alone? maybe? if i can find a cool one that isnt stupidly far away#and maybe......maybe i might try eating alone at a restaurant#that makes me want to kms though so maybe im not ready for that LMFAO#anyway. i cant believe i didnt play dragon age until just now i am so obssessed#EDIT: I MIGHT BE ABLE TO STOMACH GETTING SUSHI BY MYSELF?? OMG#PLANS MADE.#i want to learn how to eat alone at places people typically go with groups soooo badly#because i dont have a group!! i have friends i could ask but theyre usually busy#and as much as i love them i am still Performing around them and thats not what i want#i want to try new things withiut having to perform in public#and maybe if i learn how to do THAT i can learn how to relax when i AM with other people#plans made. omg
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i hate remembering im going to die one day
#ill just be sitting here and the weight of mortality comes crashing down on me for no reason#ive had these issues since i was like 5 or 6 lol#ive come to terms with it mostly like i dont have these moments of anxiety all the time anymore#growing up it was a looming fear like my entire life lol#anyway i just got that feeling again and im alone so i wanted to talk myself thru it thanks#i think its bc im almost 27 which is almost 30 which is basically dead to people now a days 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#im joking 30 is still insanely young but thats what society thinks 😭😭😭😭😭😭#it sucks tho bc im pretty sure both my nieces have these feelings too#the youngest will call my mom all the time and ask her when shes going to die#like a 5 year old shouldnt be doing that
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as much as i like the idea of it i dont think i could ever handle moving cities long term
#older relative (by marriage) of mine is moving back to america after being in aus for 25 years#i dont think ic ould handle that#i think that like#i belong to adelaide and a little part of adelaide belongs to me#as much as everyone hates on adl its not that bad#i reckon i could last like 6 months in melbourne or soemthig but then there would come the inevitable breakdown from social isolation#and the social isolation would also be inevitable bc im a nightmare at interacting with anyoen let alone strangers#got barely any friends as it is
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Do you ever just get really hung up on small injustices in your past that aren't THAT big of a deal but we're so pivotal to who you are as a person and felt like the end of the world at the time and everything turned out okay but you still get caught up on the what if of it all occasionally and mourn the person you may have been?
#like getting diagnosed as a child my life would have been so much easier#i could have gotten a scholarship and done well in ap classes but instead i trudged through the hardest years of my life on willpower alone#the friend in highschool that made me stop talking to our mutual friend after she cheated on him#and everyone sided with her because girl code or whatever#completely ignoring the fact that she cheated on him and asked me to cover for her when she did#she said we couldnt be friends if i didnt stop talking to him#when i told him he said he didnt want to ruin our friendship and he would understand if i stopped speaking to him#i told him im sorry but i was friends with her first#all this was over kik#and when i showed her the conversation and said i wouldnt talk to him again#she got mad at me because the reason i chose her was because of the length of the friendship#and 'you couldnt come up with a better reason?' and ya know what?#i fuckin apologized for that too!!#but in retrospect#NO I COULDNT COME UP WITH A BETTER REASON BECAUSE SHE WAS BEING TOXIC AS FUCK#and now i wonder all the time if i made the right choice there because we stopped speaking after highschool when we stopped seeing each#other everyday but i talked to him all the time before that and we never went to the same school#we went out of our way to talk to each other and make plans to go see each other#he was such a good friend and sometimes i think about reaching out to him but its been 8 years#and ya know whats ever more wild???#this happened to me again two years after highschool with a different friend!#but this time i chose the guy and now weve been in a relationship for 6 years
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30/01/2024, 16:55pm
Anything I want I never ever get.
#i knew taking on thiw new role wasnt yonna be good#i knew it was juet gonna stress me out and make me do things i dont wanna#i knew nessa would jsut throw my name for things and juet assjme im okay witj anytbiny#all i fuckiny wanted was a goor job witj flexibility and to be content#instwad im dragging mhself in everyday im sad all the tjme#my fuckiny family are pissing me off constantly and work is constantly pulling my laat nerve#im fuckiny done with everything#i got nothing i wanted and im notjing i thought id be#snd now i get to go to a place that triggers my anxiety and negative thinking and i get ti be alone#or wity someone who shows me up#fuckiny hate my life#work2.0#im still fuckiny here 6 years fucking later#miserable more than ever.#mytalks
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You know what hits me hard? When 5 to 6 year old children, all the way in Southeast Asia, knows about what's happening in Palestine right now. That children their age is getting bombed, that they're starving to death, that they're getting shot at, and sniped in the head. Because, just this past 2 or so months, I heard some of the little ones in the Kindergarten classes I'm TAing in as an Intern talk about it. Hell, one of the little boys downright said he didn't like Israel, because Israel is bad, because they do scary things. Another was questioning whether Palestine was bad too, because, "why else would they shooting at them?". A little girl in one of my classes doesn't want to finish her food at all, because she wants to save at least half her meat and rice for kids in Palestine, because she heard that, they don't have food. And that's just the ones I remember. Namely the inciting cases before their classmates slowly follow suit. The littles are fricking SCARED. We had to sit these kids down, and tell them that the topic is too mature for them at the moment, that they shouldn't even be concerned because they're KINDERGARTNERS, they're not even old enough to properly understand. The one teacher I was TAing for had to make a class announcement saying that. What gets me is, these are 5 to 6 year olds, the youngest I've worked with in this specific age group is 4. 5 years old on average, and they've already been exposed to the worst horrors genocide has to offer through the news and snippets of conversation among adults and hell, considering how many of them say they like to play games on Mama's phone, or their IPad, even from fricking social media. And the fact that, these literal babies, from all the way in Cambodia, has more empathy in their entire body and soul, than full grown fricking adults have in the nail of their pinky finger, gets me. FFS we as adults could LEARN from them I feel sometimes. I honestly don't know what to feel about it anymore. On the one hand, this is the next generation I'm working with. And if the next generation's default response to a tragedy such as Palestine, is what I've seen come up on occasion so far? Perhaps there's some bloody hope for this world after all. At least in this country. Especially since a majority of them already come from families who survived a genocide. These are the 3rd - 4th generation descendants of those who survived the Khmer Rouge. They've got grandparents at home, who no doubt are more than intimately familiar with what Palestine is going through right now. And it shows.
But on the other, it makes my heart sink because these are CHILDREN, these are LITTLE KIDS, they should be playing with their toys and watching cartoons and talking to their friends about everything from Spiderman to Speakerman to Kuromi and her friends, and be worried about whether or not they can go to playground that day, guranteed they're well behaved, or if Mama remembered to pack in their costume for swimming lessons that week. NOT JUST MY KIDS. But the little ones in Palestine too. They deserve better. They all deserve, so much better. Hell, it's come to the point that whenever I look at my kiddos right now, whether they'd be working in class, playing, doing something as mundane as eating lunch or getting ready for their nap. I think of the children their age in Palestine that didn't even get the chance to survive. I think of the ones whose memories from this age, is nothing but absolute horror and pain, rather than what has slowly become my normal, who never got to experience what my littles do on a daily basis right now.
Children shouldn't even be concerned about "War", about a Genocide. The last thing that should be on a 5 year old's mind, is pain, and suffering, and the worst horrors imaginable ever to be inflicted on a human being. ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S INFLICTED, ON OTHER CHILDREN THEIR AGE. And for that alone, the world has failed them. Especially the kids in Palestine who didn't ask for any of this. They just wanted to carry on with life as kids do, the same way as my littles do on a daily basis no doubt, learning, playing, chatting with friends over their favourite cartoons and characters, worrying about whether they'd get to go to the playground or not that day.
I apologize for talking about this on this blog. I know my blog tends to be lighter in feel, a lot more unhinged and light hearted typically. I mean, I'm just a fricking nerd who likes to draw and write, and lurk about her favourite fandoms to consume and support what is shared among other nerds who also like to draw and write. But I couldn't stop thinking about it. About contemplating it, especially since I'll be back on a roll tomorrow, working with my kiddos again after not seeing them for 5 days straight because of Holidays. And, I just had to talk about it. This is something I felt I couldn't keep to myself this time, I don't think my soul'd be able to carry it. I had to talk about it.
FREE PALESTINE. Our children deserve better.
#free palestine#gaza#palestine#rafah#israel#current events#gaza strip#human rights#childrens rights#save the children#cease fire in gaza#cease fire now#cease fire permanently#palestinian genocide#support gaza#pray for palestine#ceasfire now
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Pushing aside the fact that I am, quite possibly, a Kendrick fan—disregarding my biases, I think Drake needs to stop. Push Ups was a good diss. Surface level, vapid, but it possessed that mean, petty spirit that carries a diss track all the way. Even bringing up accusations that are, realistically speaking, unlikely still works because a diss is supposed to show just how much you hate a person and how cleverly you can bring it.
Taylor Made was weird. I get that it was a strategy. Drop the main diss first and then drop this one to really prod at Kendrick. Using Pac and Snoop AI voices sucks though. Distilling Kendrick as Taylor's underling also doesn't work because Kendrick only collaborated with her once (twice when they remade Bad Blood) and that's it. Meanwhile Drake is out here always looking for new, up and coming artists to pounce on their trends or cling to established artists. Then it got taken down, because of course it would have been. You used 2Pac's voice. Did you really think his estate, his family, wouldn't do anything?
So he bought Pac's ring and used his voice without permission. More and more we see just how much of a vulture Drake is.
And then Euphoria drops.
Your first diss was met with solid reactions. Your second got taken down. Kendrick drops on a random hot Tuesday, and in a matter of hours surpasses your numbers that took weeks to accumulate. Kendrick did that. Euphoria was also harsh, clever, and sounded so good that people kept replaying it over and over again. Once more, Kendrick schools you.
A few insiders then say that Drake will drop that night. Right after. But he then allegedly gets cold feet. A few hours later from when Drake was supposedly ready to drop but backs out, Kendrick drops 6:16 in LA.
In your previous disses, you begged Kendrick to drop something with quintuple entendres. Euphoria did that. But he took it a step further by naming his second diss 6:16 in LA.
June 16: Father's day. Referencing the fact that Drake has been proven to be a deadbeat father.
June 16, 1971: Tupac's Birthday. Kendrick idolizes him. Drake steals from him.
June 16, 2019: First episode of Euphoria drops. A show Drake is listed as a producer on. A show about underage girls entering a life of sex, substance abuse, and more. Things that Drake has been accused of repeatedly in the past.
June 16, 2011: in June 2, 2011, Kendrick posted on his twitter that there will be a concert at Toronto on 6/16. Allegedly this is where Drake and Kendrick first met.
6:16 AM: The time of release for this track.
6:16: Multiple possible Bible verses, given Kendrick's Christian background.
Other claims felt like reaches though, so I'll stick to that.
The final two lines of 6:16 also reference the Michael Jackson, R. Kelly, and their song "You Are Not Alone". Drake, who has always claimed he is Michael Jackson or at the very least his equal/successor, is now tied to him in a way he does not want. Because we know all of the dirt that came out after MJ's death. We all know what R. Kelly was sent to prison for. And we all know what Drake has been accused of multiple times.
Kendrick also alludes to the fact that you have a leak in your circle, Drake.
So Drake drops Family Matters. A scathing 7 minute song that makes fun of the GKMC van. Saying that Kendrick's daughter isn't his. Saying that his wife cheats on him with security. Saying that he beats his wife.
Now, these are enormous accusations levied. But Kendrick has responded before, years ago, that the DV accusations were false. He has also always been open about his faults. Adultery. Sex addiction. Insecurity. God complex. Kendrick, for better or worse, has always laid out nearly every aspect of his younger life on his songs. This also helped by the fact that in both Euphoria and 6:16, Kendrick says that Drake has spent millions on finding dirt on him but came up with nothing. Again, these accusations can still be proven true and if so, Kendrick needs to be held accountable for them.
But if not? Then Drake just adds another to the pile of "He's a liar and a master manipulator."
Drake also posts a Parody on his Insta that gains little to no attention because 30 minutes after dropping Family Matters and supposedly going on his victory lap, Kendrick drops meet the grahams.
Another thing. 6:16's cover was a glove. That meant nothing to us, the audience. meet the grahams makes it make sense by zooming out of the glove and showing off a shirt and drugs that Drake supposedly uses. Drake has not had any receipts with his accusations against Kendrick. Kendrick puts Drake's supposed prescription, his full name, on a bottle of Ozempic. Kendrick, for now, seems to make good on his threat. OvO, Drake's company, is full of leaks. And they're leaking it straight to Kendrick Lamar.
Nearly 24 hours later, Kendrick drops Not Like Us.
Euphoria was a general character dissection and assassination of Drake: Insecure about his identity as a biracial man. Culture Vulture. Blaccent user. Code switcher. Fake abs. Womanizer. Misogynist. Using black features just to feel black enough. A deadbeat dad that knows nothing of raising a child. And even revokes Drake's ability to use the N-Word (I have no stake in that I am Asian so I will keep my brown mouth shut for that).
6:16 in LA was an ominous threat that slowly reveals that Kendrick has insider information on Drake. That he is ready to leak so much more should Drake continue.
meet the grahams is a brutal open letter to Drake, his parents, and even to Adonis, Drake's son. Saying that Kendrick could be a better mentor to Adonis. Saying that Drake abandoned you and that's not your fault. Don't be like your father—whatever anyone says, for better or worse, you are a black man and don't code switch just to make yourself feel better. He says that Drake failed his mother for what he did to women. Saying that Drake's father is the cause of his gambling issues. Drake is a body shamer. Leaving the mother of his children to rot. And of course, the reveal that Drake has a secret daughter, the same way Pusha T revealed Drake has a son. Adonis.
And of course, now. Not Like Us. Where Kendrick goes all in on one topic that he has alluded to in every diss track before. Drake is a groomer. A pedophile.
I am sick. I should not be tuning into this beef. But my fever can go ahead and end me, I need to know how this ends.
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hi! i was just wondering if you’re getting a piece of this pie. https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/voidrealmminis/rise-of-the-eldertubbies?ref=profile_saved_projects_live
Oh my goodness! Haha thanks for showing me! And no, of course, this guy is still selling my dream while claiming it’s totally nothing to do with me. I hadn’t heard about it so thank you.
For those just joining us, here is the saga of the elder teletubbies:
1. in 2017 I posted a dream I had on Tumblr. In the dream I discovered that the childish teletubbies shown on BBC’s Teletubbies are merely the children of a species that grows up to be forest cryptids as adults. The post contained a detailed character description explaining how the children’s simple antennae become more complex antlers; their coats become thicker hair; their eldritch screens are unknowable; here, look:
The adult Teletubbies have more branching, complex antlers and shaggy coats. They are less brightly coloured. They are terrifyingly large. Their strangely human faces, emerging from the thick fur, are unquestionably adult; remote, serene, reproachful. Their television screens are glitchy, esoteric and unknowable. They are cryptids whose public exploitation has undermined their rarity and their strange, alien dignity.
That’s a pretty clear description.
2. The post quickly gained attention and many people drew art, made sculptures, designed in-depth character concepts, and even made DnD character sheets and entries with detailed notes. It was 2017. The post got over 90k notes. It had an extremely clear description of the cryptid in it. This wasn’t at all obscure.
3. The post and four pieces of the concept art, including the first piece by were screencapped and posted on r/tumblr. The post included this art by the now-deactivated @finoliatav which is, I think, the first piece of art. Most screencaps don’t show that it’s animated! Once you see it you can no longer pretend that any more work needs to be done in designing these characters, really - they’re all variations on a very clear theme.
4. A guy called Jars started drawing the BBC Teletubbies as adult Teletubbies. He noted on Reddit that his inspiration for the first one was the r/tumblr post but after that, he considered it entirely his own creative work. He drew each of the 4 BBC Teletubbies as adults using my character description and wrote a little story about how his character had stumbled upon them in the woods. He’s a good artist and his work went viral on Reddit and instagram. Those places being separate from Tumblr by the walls of the enclosure, they quickly believed the Jars was being highly original and praised him for it.
5. jars got carried away by his fame and started merchandising for all he’s worth. He’s selling elder teletubbies placemats. He got a collaborator to help him make and sell plushies.
6. Plushies of my character design applied to BBC characters. Jars sells them. To people. Who buy them. He sells these.
7. I think this is like… his job.
8. It has been years of this. I don’t think he has actually come up with anything else to sell by himself. But given that he now has millions upon millions of views on platforms I don’t use, let alone dominate (Instagram, YouTube, Reddit, TikTok) he seems to have fully subscribed to the idea that this is his THING.
9. After a while I wrote him a friendly email expressing that since my original dream was very much about discomfort with how the teletubbies were being exploited, I didn’t mind him selling his own art but that I wasn’t happy with him selling plushes based on my writing.
10. He wrote back along the lines of it all being his original intellectual property and absolutely nothing to do with me, etc, so jog on and don’t interfere.
11. I’m not entirely sure where the original intellectual property is when taking BBC characters and drawing them according to someone else’s detailed description of how to “evolve” them (branching antlers, shaggy coats, eldritch screens, serene adult human faces) especially having drawn them after seeing four separate detailed reference photos to base your own drawings on; especially when they’re the existing BBC characters from the show and not even your own. Like, Jars, you were given an entire detailed brief, several sets of references, an entire concept and a television show: the only artistic choices made here were to pick up your own personal pen and do the drawing. You have never deviated from my description, which you did not come up with yourself in any way. But okay Jars. You did some real intellectual heavy lifting here, this is Intellectual Property suddenly, and I guess this is your day job!
12. I myself actually have a day job, am capable of generating lots of other original material just for funsies, have never asked you guys for money, and I’m not generally huge jerk I don’t think. Also, I’m uncomfortable but have never been clear on how to stop him - I don’t think I can. So I don’t do much about this, apart from occasionally scream with hilarity with you guys about it.
13. Like this is the opposite of Goncharov. This is a guy making his wage on a 2017 tumblr collaborative shitpost insisting that this is the beautiful fruit of his only brain. And millions of people believe him.
14. There are now YouTube documentaries with millions of views and TikTok lore about Jars, and his lore, the Elder Teletubbies, which apparently he invented. People are making their wage talking about the history of Jars and his teletubbies lore. These documentaries are, if you can’t tell, not especially well-researched, as it is not difficult to find the original elder teletubbies art on the internet, which is all timestamped. Occasionally hilarious people from Tumblr point this out in the comments (thank you, you guys are hilarious) but the juggernaut is unstoppable!
15. Jars is now, apparently, doing a kickstarter to raise money for some kind of DnD sheets using the grown up BBC teletubbies.
16. I will point out that tumblr made and played with DnD teletubbies in 2017 for free and nobody had to pay $3000, but again. The juggernaut is unstoppable.
I have never, ever known what to do about this guy.
I have always been open to advice but genuinely never been able to articulate how it “damages” me, apart from ethical discomfort about how much I hate my writing being monetised by other people, especially when it was about my discomfort with exploitation. The juggernaut is unstoppable though. He fully intends to get thousands of dollars from this. He almost certainly will!
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