#they're thinking they're going to spoil the hell out of him while pretending to be indifferent 🤔

[byanyan]

byan's opinion is that valentine's day is stupid and pointless. unless you're buying stuff for them, of course.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

I remember reading someone say that they hope Seviathan ISN’T a jerk and if/when he comes to the hotel, he actually wants to help Charlie in her mission of redemption…then ends up with a crush on Vaggie, lol.

Mate, how funny would that be? 😂😂😂 You’re here to genuinely help your ex, then end up falling for her girlfriend. While it isn’t socially acceptable or appropriate, I think it’s cute. I guess Vags has that sort of affect on people.

oh man, if we go the absolute CHAD route for Sevi WHILE imagining him getting a crush on Vaggie... like, dude meets scary lady, doesn't notice how scary his EX gets over him staring at HER girlfriend, and maybe it's time for Sev to have some personal epiphanies?

Seviathan: "Knock knock? Yo Charles-a-lot! This really your hotel?"

Angel Dust: "Oh heyyy, look what the undead boy band dragged in..."

Husk: (snorts)

Charlie: "Sev? SEV! Holy shit what are you doing here!?"

Angel Dust: "Wait a sec, Sev? As in-"

Husk: "Oh shit."

Angel Dust: "Ex boyfriend on the hotel premises oh this is gonna get INTERESTIN'. Bet on how quick he gets maimed?"

Husk: "Fuck no. She'd kill us too."

Angel Dust: "Sigh... S'pose so. Spoil sport spear bitch..."

Seviathan: "I heard about your thing! Figured you could use a hand with the whole... uh... Sinner pet project obsession."

Charlie: "But Isn't there a game on right now-"

Seviathan: "Nah, everything's blocked out by replays of your little slap fight with heaven. Which I totally could've helped with too, if you'd given me a heads up first."

Charlie: "I did call? I said goodbye in case I died and-"

Seviathan: "Didn't hear it. You know I don't check voice mail. Everyone's always blowing up my inbox trying to to hit me up."

Angel Dust: "Oh my fucking gay."

Husk: "Would you hit that?"

Angel Dust: "If I did ya'd have to shoot me afterwards."

Seviathan: "Anyway, that's how I found out you'd actually went ahead and tried this thing out for real! And made a real mess of it. You totally cut off the final quarter of the best game of the year with all that live coverage."

Charlie: "Sorry, sorry- we REALLY didn't have say in the timing on that-"

Husk: "No shit."

Seviathan: "Eh. The team's played like shit anyway ever since I left."

Charlie: "Didn't you get kicked off for hogging the ball-"

Angel Dust: "Shocker."

Husk: "Never would have fucking guessed."

Seviathan: "Not dropping the ball isn't the same as hogging it and I never drop the ball on anything. You sure have though!"

Charlie: "I have? Where? Or er with what??"

Seviathan: "This hotel lobby for a start. Where's the billiards table!"

Charlie: "Ohhh. We don't have one."

Seviathan: "Why the hell not???"

Charlie: "No one's asked?"

Seviathan: "Well what the fuck does everyone here DO all day long? You've got actual people staying here, right? You're not still playing pretend hostess to stuffed animals and stuff?"

Angel Dust: "I kinda hope Vaggisaurus kills him."

Husk: "Don't get your hopes up. You know she's whipped and Charlie's a fucking sweetheart."

Angel Dust: "A bestie can dream..."

Charlie: "No I am NOT playing pretend hostess, thanks for mentioning it by the way, in public, in front of my friends- and yes we DO have guests at the hotel! Some of them here of their own free will even!"

Husk: "Not it."

Angel Dust: "Bullshit."

Charlie: "They have lots of fun activity time too! Even when we're not doing talk circles!"

Seviathan: "Uh huh."

Charlie: "Yes! Mostly we all like watching TV- well almost all of us- or listening to the radio to pass the time, or hanging out chatting, or reading-"

Seviathan: "So they're pussies."

Husk: "Hey."

Angel Dust: "Down, pussycat~"

Husk: (HISS)

Charlie: "They are NOT-"

Angel Dust: "Speakin' of pussy...."

Seviathan: "Yeah we're talking about you, what about it? Anyway."

Seviathan: (puts hand on charlie's arm)

Angel Dust: "Here it comes-"

Seviathan: "I've been thinking about us lately, and-" (spear thuds next to his head) "-SHIT!!! HOLY SHIT?!?!"

Husk: "Damn. She missed."

Angel Dust: "Just an openin' shot, Mr. Whiskers." (rubs all four hands together) "Oh this is gonna be goooood~"

Charlie: "Vaggie!" (BEAMING) "I thought we talked about this?"

Vaggie: (swoops down) "He's not a gust yet, babe, so I can greet him spear first if I want to."

Charlie: "Sev's my ex boyfriend though!"

Vaggie: "I know."

Vaggie: (yanks spear out of wall and holds it under his throat) "What the fuck are you doing here."

Seviathan: "I, uhh- is, is that angelic steel..?"

Charlie: (laughing) "Vaggieeee. You're scaring him~"

Angel Dust: "An' turnin' her on."

Husk: (elbows him)

Vaggie: "We said hotel security would be my thing until the threat of random asshole angel attacks went down, remember hun? This is my day job."

Charlie: "I never said I was complaining! Juuuust commentating!"

Vaggie: "Alright then."

Vaggie: (backs Seviathan against wall with her spear)

Vaggie: "Talk. Now."

Seviathan: (swallows hard) "I'm swinging by to help Charlie with the hotel thing-"

Vaggie: "Why."

Seviathan: "She used to be my girl, a guy's got a responsibility-"

Vaggie: "Did she ask you to."

Seviathan: "No? She, she doesn't have to-"

Vaggie: "Did you ask her if you could help."

Seviathan: "It's no trouble, I don't mind a little extra work-"

Vaggie: "Are you here to ask for a room in our hotel."

Seviathan: "In this place? Fuck no, you should see the digs I have, I've got a-"

Vaggie: "So you're trespassing."

Angel Dust: "Ohhh!"

Seviathan: "I'm wha-"

Husk: "Fucking screwed."

Vaggie: "You came here just to swan all over her hard work and stroke your own ego, is what I'm hearing."

Seviathan: "Hey girl, I'm here to he-ULP-!"

Vaggie: "Shut up." (over shoulder) "Charlie?"

Charlie: "Mm....wellllll... Since he's already here, as long he really does help, I'm fine with it. He's harmless. He'd just... um..."

Husk: "A fuckhead."

Angel Dust: "Don't take my fav word in vain, baby."

Charlie: "He's my ex for a reason."

Husk: "Fuck you."

Angel Dust: "Much better."

Vaggie: "He's your ex for an annoying reason, or for being an actual jerk who's earned getting kicked out on his ass for once in his life kinda reason, sweetie?"

Nifty: (popping up from floorboards) "Is he a BAAAAD BOYYYY~?"

Seviathan: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAt-"

Vaggie: "What part of shut up there's a spear at your throat don't you get."

Seviathan: (jaw clicks shut)

Charlie: "Nope! He's not a boy boy! Just annoying! Mostly."

Nifty: "DAMN IT."

Angel Dust: "How's the huntin' goin' today, Nif?"

Nifty: (pouts) "The last baby bug got away... I hadn't even finished ripping it's little legs off while the mother bug watched it squirm..." (slinks back under floor)

Everyone else: "....."

Charlie: "... so! (claps hands)

Charlie: "Sev, if you really wanna help out that's fine, we're still finishing up the last touches on the new hotel if you feel like doing a little paint work and furniture moving!"

Seviathan: "....."

Charlie: "Sev?"

Seviathan: "..."

Angel Dust: "Think we broke him."

Husk: "I think it's the fucking spear pressed up against his fucking windpipe."

Charlie: "Oh! Whoops. Vaggie, please?"

Vaggie: ".... fiiiine."

Vaggie: (steps back) (wipes spear on nearby curtains) "Answer her."

Seviathan: (staring) "What's your name?"

Vaggie: "Hotel manager. Answer her."

Seviathan: "Charlie-" (still staring at vaggie) "-I would LOVE to help set up your pet sinner terrarium thing!"

Vaggie: "Our WHAT."

Husk & Angel Dust: "Hey!"

Charlie: "It's a hotel, Sev."

Seviathan: "Uh huh yeah sure, that thing!"

Vaggie: (lifts spear)

Charlie: (gently pushes gf spear back down) "Oh I'm going to regret this... ok. Let's, get you some gloves and stuff."

Seviathan: "Alright!" (holds hand up to vaggie) "Give me some skin!"

Vaggie: "...." (lifts spear again)

Charlie: "Excuse us Sev just ONE moment!"

Charlie: (pulls gf safe distance away)

Charlie: "Vaggie..? You okay?"

Vaggie: "Fine."

Charlie: "You're eye's, um. Twitching." (tenderly brushes fringe away from gf's eye) "Are you okay with this? He doesn't have to stay."

Vaggie: "No. It's fine." (sighs) "I want to be okay with it."

Charlie: "It's okay if you're not!"

Vaggie: "I will be, sweetie. Just give me a minute." (leans up for kiss) "But. I need to go do a Niffty and stab something. Really hard. Right now. And if I stay here one minute more, it's gonna be him."

Charlie: "Okay." (giggles) "Have fun stabbing things that aren't my ex?"

Vaggie: "I'll try to."

Seviathan: "Oh hey I'm awesome at stabbing! And the thrusting!"

Angel Dust: "PLEASE stick around, toots."

Husk: (mumbling) "Please fucking stick him."

Seviathan: "Long hard things are totally my thing, I could give you a few pointers on handling them no problem!"

Vaggie: "No."

Seviathan: "Oh come on, how about a hands on demonstration-"

Vaggie: (at charlie) "Keep him away from the kitchen knifes. He looks like he'd stab himself showing off and make a mess."

Charlie: "Heheh~ I'll try to."

Vaggie: "Good luck with that babe." (smooches her) (flies off to go stab)

Seviathan: "...."

Seviathan: "She single?"

Charlie: "She- NO? She is not??"

Angel Dust: (whisper hissing) "Is he blind? Didn't they just kiss???"

Seviathan: "We'll she's gonna be single soon, but not for long."

Husk: "He's dead."

Demon Charlie: "Her girlfriend is ME, Seviathan."

Seviathan: "Girlfriend? So she's-"

Demon Charlie: "VERY VERY GAY and TAKEN, YES."

Seviathan: "Wait, with you? Seriously??"

Demon Charlie: "Yes. Me. For s e v e r a l. Happy. Years."

Husk: (lifts bottle) "Cheers motherfuckers."

Seviathan: "Ohhh, so all that making out with you she did, it wasn't just her flirting with m-"

Angel Dust: "Holy. Fuck."

Demon Charlie: "SHE WASN't FLIRTING WITH YOU! SHE LOVES ME- SHE WANTS TO KILL YOU!!!"

Seviathan: "I'd let her, to be honest. She's hot."

Husk: "Let her?"

Angel Dust: "Dude."

Husk: "The fuck does he mean, let her? He wouldn't have a fucking choice-"

Demon Charlie: "On second thought maybe you SHOULD'NT help out with the hotel, actually!"

Demon Charlie: (grabbing him by scruff of the neck and marching towards door) "It was VERY nice of you to drop by, PLEASE go have a good rest of your life, you'll probably have a LONGER one if you live it away from here!"

Seviathan: "Aww Charlie, getting nervous over having competition?"

Husk: (spits out drink)

Demon Charlie: "You are SOOOOOO not competition! You might end up being another hotel fatality though!"

Angel Dust: "Bet on which of 'em kills him first?"

Husk: "Shut up I'm trying to listen."

Seviathan: "I just think a woman like that should have her pick from the best hell can offer!"

Demon Charlie: "I'm the princess of hell???"

Seviathan: "Sure, but you hardly ever act like it."

Demon Charlie: "I...! She, she doesn't mind me being like me. She-"

Seviathan: "What, a commanding woman like that is fine with a spineless partner? No offence. But come on."

Angel Dust: "Alright, now I'm gonna kill him."

Husk: "Let her do it herself."

Angel Dust: "Hmph!"

Seviathan: "She's never asked you to try being more of an actual princess sometimes?"

Demon Charlie: "No, she... Not like, not like that..."

Seviathan: "Not like that, huh?"

Demon Charlie: "No." (yanks open door) "And our relationship has NOTHING to do with you."

Seviathan: (grabbing doorframe) "But you know it could."

Demon Charlie: "NO IT WON'T. COULDN'T! WILL NOT, EVER!!!!"

Seviathan: "So why're you throwing me out of your silly hotel thing, then?"

Demon Charlie: "....."

Seviathan: "Scaaaared...?"

Demon Charlie: (drops him) (shuts door) "I trust her."

Seviathan: "Said like no one who ever got dumped so their girl could be with me."

Demon Charlie: "I trust her not to ACTUALLY kill you, I mean."

Seviathan: "Fuck I hope she tries... Maybe I'll let her pin me again."

Husk: (SNORTS) "'Let her'..."

Angel Dust: "He's gonna earn a fucking Darwin award at this rate."

Seviathan: (dusting ash off himself) "Kinda impressed you got all demon-ed so fast for this though. That's new!"

Charlie: "I've told you, it only happens when I'm PISSED. OFF."

Angel Dust: "YEAH DOLLFACE GET HIS ASS!"

Seviathan: "I know but like, it used to take a lot to get you all riled up. I hardly ever got to see you like this in bed even. Maybe if it'd been easier we'd still be a thing?"

Charlie: "You know I realllly really doubt it since I dumped YOU."

Husk: "HA!"

Angel Dust: "WOOOOO! BURRRRRN!"

Charlie: "And I dumped you partly BECAUSE you kept trying to 'rile me up' so you could try having sexy scary demon sex with me!"

Angel Dust: "OHHHHH!!!!"

Charlie: "Not that you ever even DID!"

Husk: "Fuck yes."

Charlie: "Because I always had waaaaay more fun sleeping on the COUCH!"

Husk & Angel Dust: (high five)

Seviathan: "...."

Seviathan: "So that's a no to having a threesome with us once I'm dating your soon to be ex girlfriend, huh?"

Demon Charlie: "SEV-"

Charlie: (deep breath)

Charlie: "... why do you even think you like her, Seviathan? You don't know her. She doesn't like you. You don't even know her name."

Seviathan: "She's hot."

Charlie: "Can We Try To Be More Specific, Please."

Seviathan: "I don't know? It was cute how she tried bullying me against a wall like that. All snapping orders like she was some kinda drill sergeant, or like a hot coach lady, treating me like some kinda bug crawling by her shoe- Who doesn't think that's hot?"

Charlie: "...."

Charlie: "Ohhhh."

Angel Dust: "Oh FUCK!"

Husk: (laughing) "The motherfucking alpha man-"

Angel Dust: "He's a fucking sub!!!!"

Seviathan: "What, like the sandwich? Shit. Are my pants fitting too tight again-"

Charlie: "Angel Dust."

Angel Dust: "Yesssss oh fearless leader...?

Charlie: (covers eyes) (turns) (escapes)

Charlie: "He's all yours."

Seviathan: "Whoa wait, where're you going-"

Charlie: "I'm gonna go surprise MY longtime girlfriend with kisses!"

Seviathan: "Hold on don't leave me with these two! Charlie!?"

Charlie: (already gone)

Seviathan: "For fuck's sake then I'm outta here too! I didn't come here to hang out with lame guys-"

Angel Dust: "Oh my little baby boy."

Angel Dust: (grins) (leans in) ".....how's the idea of a woman standin' over you with a whip make ya feel?"

Seviathan: "Good?"

Angel Dust: "Mm-hmm. An' if ya was wearing a collar?"

Seviathan: "..." (takes off hat) (holds it over crotch)

Husk: "Great. Another horrible memory to drown away with booze." (swigs)

Angel Dust: (draping arm around seviathan) "C'mon, let's find ya a dom who WON'T for real rail you with her spear~"

Seviathan: "Oh whoa."

Husk: "Oh fucking save me booze..." (down in one)

Niffty: (sobbing under floorboards)

Husk: "What the fuck? What's wrong with you?"

Niffty: "Th-the bad boys..." (sniffling) "... why are so many of them turning out LAME? Even the king of HELL asked me if I was OKAY when he stepped out his door in his ducky slippers and found me lying in front of it like a rug! WHAT IS WRONG WITH BAD MEN THESE DAYS!?"

Husk: "...."

Husk: "Here."

Husk: (hands down drink)

Niffty: (hands popping out to grabby grabby) "IT'S SO SAAAAAD HUSK!" (snatches) (gulps) (gulps) (faint thump and snoring)

Husk: "I can't fucking believe I risked my fucking life for this place."

Husk: (smiles anyway)

[flowersforchoso]

Bi-han as a father.

it takes a while for him to adjust to the concept of fatherhood as a result of the strained relationship he had with his father.

but once he gets the hang of it, he'll be the perfect mix of stern and loving. capable of striking fear in his children's hearts if you threaten to report them, "i'll tell your father" works like a charm to make them act right, but he's welcoming and will never turn his children away or refuse to engage them.

realistically, he would've like 2-3 kids max.

he's a disciplinarian through and through. won't tolerate misbehavior or disrespect, especially if its towards you. he doesn't take kindly to that.

sometimes you feel he's being excessive with it and intervene

"mommy!" your child cries, running to you for protection from their father—a refuge—to which you'd complain that he's being needlessly harsh

"you coddle them too much, that's the problem." he scolds. "no child of mine will be errant"

of course, you get upset at his hard-headedness that barely makes him see from your perspective

and he can tell, because you're no longer receptive to his advances in protest against his behaviour

so he tones down the discipline and tries to be lenient with them. keyword: tries.

nevertheless, he's nurturing and very hands-on. attentive as well. if something is wrong, he notices right away.

will cook for his children because he believes he's the better cook, but they think otherwise, since he just puts lots of vegetables in the food. he wants them to grow healthy and strong

he teaches his children from a tender age to be self-sufficient and trains them to be able to protect themselves and you, if the situation calls for it.

dad time is essential. will take them to exciting places and partake in outdoor activities like gardening, hiking, fishing or simply errands to the marketplace etc. he loves to spend time with them and would crack dad jokes here and there to entertain them. they'll pretend to find it funny.

he's overprotective and strives to be a good role model to his kids.

now if he's a girl dad, there's a slight twist.

his parenting style is much more relaxed due to his mother being the only female presence he had growing up so its a mix of cluelessness and traditional ideals shining through and will mostly take cues from you

training is not mandatory but if they're interested, he would be happy. its not as rigorous and they have the choice to opt out anytime.

he dotes excessively on them that'll make you wonder if this was the same person you married. but it's mainly because he sees them as mini versions of you

at this point, its no surprise he's the preferred parent because of how affectionate he is towards them. and big, strong dad gives the best piggyback rides.

infact, you would have to complain that he's spoiling them too much to which he'd respond

"what's it to you? don't question my parenting" and you leave it at that.

treats them delicately. his paternal instincts go into overdrive everytime and he gets easily worried when it comes to them

when they reach a certain age, he doesn't shy away from topics relating to womanhood. but that doesn't mean he initiates the conversation. he takes on the passive role of listener and further educates himself by asking you questions in private which you tease him for being eager to learn

doesn't joke with his daughters. he's a nightmare of a father nobody would want to deal with because he would raise hell if anyone dares hurt them in any capacity

he's changed so much since having them; has become softened, and is grateful to you for this wonderful gift.

but if he only has sons, its a different story entirely

he's twice as stern and this is because he grew up with brothers so he knows how unruly boys can be

training is mandatory for them, they do not get the luxury to choose. he wants them to be able to protect themselves and you, so he doesn't ever present the opportunity for slacking

in short, he rules with an iron fist. you'd have to remind him that they're his children, not his underlings

struggles with voicing his affection. you'd have to reassure your sons that their father, infact, loves them

and it's only natural they gravitate towards you.

but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for them. because he does. its all about tough love and instilling strong values in them, leaving no room for weakness.

and they constantly want to impress their father. on rare occasions when they do, or bi han is feeling particularly soft, he looks at them with adoration and ruffles their hair or simply utters a "well done" that means the world to them

they look up to their father and are always around him seeking validation

[zoniteillusion-pyritedreams]

Sunghoon as a boyfriend??👹❤️

I feel like I constantly want to be shocked in terms of these readings when it comes to again the 4th / 5th gen boys but like I'm just I'm not. Mainly because again I feel like they're all just a little traumatized and because of that they all happen to be just a little possessive a little obsessive a little if you genuinely want a booktok Wattpad fanfiction ask type of boyfriend. Then baby y'all need to sit there and start using the law of assumption( the law of attractions perfectly fine I personally don't like it but you know whatever we're not talking about spiritual shit technically.) And start trying to manifest yourselves a fourth/5th gen Idol boy.

I personally blame Jackson Wang yeah that man sat there and accidentally became the very thing that fans were unintentionally manifesting him to be and I feel like because of that now the fan energy is so God damn strong in the universe that a bunch of fans have accidentally manifested two entire generations of boy group members that are exactly how the absolute filthiest most unhinged what the fuck was wrong with us slash honestly make sense when you think about it FanFictions that used to be and probably still are written about some of these celebrities and how people would just imagine them to be in a relationships has somehow managed to manifest again into two whole ass generations!

What’s Park Sunghoon Like As a Boyfriend?

First song on the playlist?

“First Guess” by Charli XCX

Translation:

“I knew you were gonna wreck me... and I let you.”

We’re not even five seconds into this and already? CHAOTIC LOVER VIBES.

Sunghoon isn’t the “safe pick” he’s the “I know better but I want it anyway” boy.

You’re not falling in love. You’re getting dragged into (the kinky depths of hell while he rearranges your guts and makes you sit there and cry out in desperation pleading gagging not being able to breathe. All while he has that ridiculous smirk on his face and then act like nothing happened 5 minutes later and that he does not understand why you can't walk straight and instead please the docking oh no are you okay boyfriend while you're sitting there trying not to let everyone else know that he just rearranged your guts dressed you and then offered you out of the house because you had plans and the idea of you possibly turning other men's Head absolutely made him go feral.) it—lip gloss smeared, phone on DND, body aching, soul trembling.

THE ASTRO COCKTAIL:

Neptune Reversed:

Oh babe, he’s hard to read. The man gives illusionist energy one moment he's soft, the next he ghosts you emotionally (not literally, he's too loyal for that).

You think you know him? Plot twist he just shapeshifted into a completely different flavor of boyfriend.

Jupiter Reversed:

He’s slow to open up. Not into big, flashy declarations of love until he’s 110% sure you’re not here to break him. His love language? Earned trust. And once you pass the test?

He spoils you in his own understated, hot-boy-in-love way.( Plan B birth control and condoms are your new best friend.)

Sagittarius:

Don’t get it twisted though he might be cautious emotionally, but this man?

Adventure in the sheets.

( Kelly Rowland Motivation now playing)

Witty, flirtatious, dangerously charming when he’s in his comfort zone. He’ll pull you in with a dry joke and next thing you know your hoodie is off and you’re in a very unholy position, legs in the air head on the ground pretending to be watching the anime playing on the TV.

THE LOVER’S ORACLE SAYS:

“Feel your relationship being healed this very moment…”

This is a man who loves deeply but with scars. He wants to be seen not just for the pretty face and Idol image, but for the quiet, observant, moody boy underneath.

He’s healing.

You’ll feel it when you hold him.

You’ll feel it when he says “thank you” after you kiss his cheek instead of his lips.

(As I had stated and hinted at before homeboy is currently in the middle of healing. 100% still stick by the fact that I don't think you'd be getting into any sort of a serious relationship or ready to be in one for the next few years I'm talking 2029. But he also gives off Slow Burn energy so technically speaking anytime during the next like this year and 3 years following he could still technically meet someone it just will be a slow burn. Unless of course they can like like that fire Underneath Him or they happen to be a spiritual girl eat yourself like I said people need healing and people heal differently all of the time but nothing is set in stone also if you know anything about the laws of the universe you can quit literally manifest shit that you shouldn't be able to. I think I would have to do a story time about like the several times I accidentally manifested going to concerts and then the few times I accidentally manifested having my tickets upgraded because like holy fuck was those experiences. Though I would probably never do standing or VIP pit area unless they're seeing because Ur spiritual bad bitch also happens suddenly be 144 / 145 cm tall for my Americans that don't know how to convert that obituaries only 4 ft 9 1/2 in tall. Even though I tend to wear chunky golf step on me mommy heels two concerts that are comfortable as fuck a bitch is still not seeing over like 5'3.)

ISLAND TIME TEA:

Addiction:

Once he lets you in, he’s OBSESSED. You become his person. His comfort. His addiction. He might get a lil clingy without realizing it (he’ll play it cool, but he checks your texts five times before replying).

Love:

He loves hard. He won’t say it right away... but his eyes will. His actions will. That one late-night “did you eat?” will hit like a sonnet.

Karmic Relationship:

This is not puppy love. It’s "you triggered me and I still want to hold you until I can breathe again” love.

The kind that teaches him things. The kind that hurts a little because it matters a lot.

( all together now. A little traumatized!)

MESSAGE OF LOVE:

Boundaries:

He respects yours but also needs his. If he shuts down? Don’t push. Just hold space. He’ll come back with a softer version of himself and a hoodie for you to steal. Also may end up being slightly clingy for a little bit 48-72 hours of soft boy Hoon.

Vulnerability:

He’s selective. You’ll only see the realest, rawest sides of him if he feels safe. He’s emotionally intelligent under the surface but guarded like Fort Knox.

Support:

The boyfriend who’ll stay up with you when you're anxious. Will never mock your dreams. Will let you lay on his lap while he strokes your hair in silence.

Soft touch. Quiet loyalty. Ride or die in disguise.

SO WHAT’S HE LIKE?

Sunghoon is the “slow-burn, enemies to lovers” main character of your life.

He starts as a mystery,

becomes your warmest blanket,

then surprises you by whispering filth in your ear at 3 a.m. with a smirk that ruins your whole soul.

He’s:

The glacier that turns into lava.

Soft-spoken in public, POSSESSIVE IN PRIVATE.

Quick with a dry joke, slow to say “I love you,”

but when he finally does?

It’s in the form of soft groans, sleepy eye contact, and holding you like his life depends on it.

Aesthetics? Cold prince.

Vibes? Soft dom.

Heart? Hidden in layers, wrapped in silk, pulsing for the one who earns it.

You don’t date Sunghoon.

You UNRAVEL him.

And once you do?

You’re ruined for anyone else.

[clandestineivory]

hey fleurrrrrr

it's me, the demon (you know who)

can I request smth about Shadow Milk's canonical fragile body? Like- what do you think he'd do and stuff idk

(✿ﾟ▽ﾟ)ノ anon btw and you know who I am

okay (my fingers hurt but what the hell it's smc and I'm ready to work)

Shadow Milk Cookie Headcanons: "Fragile."

Summary: I think the crisis of arthritis is affecting me now because oh my lord my hands hurt like hell (it's been happening to my family for so long and I'm next nawww) I had to go do some digging about this and yknow what "(✿ﾟ▽ﾟ)ノ anon"? This is gonna be some extra headcanons because I need a redo and I think he's so wet cat coded with that fuck-ass haircut

Warning: Swearing (i fear it was obvious), bad grammar, possible ooc, lazy. So very lazy. a/n: I'm tired after finishing a sewing project and having to deal with 3 google slide presentations (chat I'm COOKED) I don't wanna talk abt 9/11 and then about Frida Kahlo and THEN about Kaumuali'i like how does this even happen to me

He should've been voiced by a vocaloid but nobody's ready to hear my weird opinion (no hate to the va though i love his talent)

I think he'd put on a front about how he's so strong and mighty and smart (and I can admit that he's smart), but c'mon. Look at him. He uses magic more than he uses his legs to walk.

Do you think he wonders why the Witch baked him like that though- just a fleeting thought that comes up from time to time when he's actually siting on a solid surface. His power lies in intellect, illusion, and psychological manipulation, not brawn. Not like Burning Spice Cookie (who definitely has some smarts of his own, I promise you. ruthless and calculating muscular men my beloved)

He might even tell himself it doesn’t matter, really! That he redefined his own purpose, made him a better version of what he used to be! (But the slight doubt lingers. Of course the Master of Deceit can act and pretend so much so that he forgot what was real behind the glamour and theatricals)

I think he'd use magic to cheat his way out of doing most physical stuff. It's as easy as breathing, so why would he want to take the harder, more taxing way? Sounds boring, doesn't it?

Anyways I think he's allergic to bleach

And honestly, look at him. Does he really look like the typa cookie to be strong (physically)?

He'd probably be wobbly on his legs when he actually has to stand and walk around yknow.

Leans against the wall and pretends to act all mysterious but he's probably SLUMPED against that thing oml get this guy some crutches or make him use his staff RIGHT (or steal GingerBrave's cane idk)

He smells atrocious when left in humid weather for a long time (he becomes like spoiled milk and rotten blueberries. He can't visit Burning Spice for long because of that lmao. keep him away from the deserts PLEASE or else he'll turn into YOGURT)

The type to tolerate 4 bottles of berry juice (or 6 1/2 if he's in a pissy mood) and then go on and on about what it was like being the Fount of Knowledge while trying to crawl into a portal and sleep (or die inside, either one)

Probably the Cookie version of anemic and that's why he hates physical work (literally me)

Music tastes range from a whole orchestra or piano (but I feel as though he'd enjoy opera singing quite a bit. He's over a thousand years old stuck in that body. let the old grandpa in him have some joy that isn't immediately about psychological tormenting others lmao /j I know he has other hobbies I swear)

Calls most of the Ancients 'youngsters' jokingly or 'old' depending on the time of day (peepaw shadow milk go back to bed please and stop calling these guys old)

This headcanon is probably ooc and y'all can beat my ass:

I think he judges whoever he meets and categorizes them as specific chess pieces.

For example -> Black Sapphire and Candy Apple? Rooks. Helpful, ready to serve. Maybe Bishops, but they're being quite genuine when it comes to helping the Master of Deceit. Queens? -> Shadow Milk Cookie himself! (moves in all directions, can easily change the tide of the game when released, quite popular), Burning Spice (same thing but way more destructive...goes off-script sometimes, and the improv is not that good!)...honestly? All of the Beast Cookies. Maybe Mystic Flour is an exception, maybe not.

Pawns? -> Everyone who doesn't seem like a real threat. NPC's, regular Cookies, ect... but they can certainly become something else with enough patience and perseverance. That's the fun part.

and I lowk gave up on this headcanon rn because i typed a whole thing out but my computer got sassy with me and deleted it all (fuck you, man. I ordered you in rose-gold because I thought it would be pretty, not a bitch)

Can I go on to say that milk, ice cream, orange juice, and blue raspberry soda tastes so fucking good like oh my heavens it's like a fizzy ice cream

or milk with frozen blueberries

[brotherwtf]

in a modern au where clegan would be dads, what kind of parents do you think they’d be like?? 💗

omg clegan as dads is gonna make me so soft 🥹

this has definitely been talked about before but they would be SUCH girl dads omg those girls would be spoiled to all hell

John lets them play with his hair and put makeup on him, always plays along with their make believe and just nods and starts serving face when his daughters are like "Daddy's so pretty!!"

Gale would always play pretend with them, making up elaborate stories for them and lifting them up so that they're "flying" omg his tea parties would go OFF

John makes lunch for them every morning while Gale does their hair and gets them ready for the day

John would definitely cry when they go to their first day of kindergarten or smth while Gale is just a nervous wreck the whole time, just hugs and kisses and fancy dinner when they get back from their first day

Gale is technically the stricter parent, but it's literally just bcs he doesn't let the girls have candy for breakfast or do whatever stupid plan John has cooked up with them, usually he just caves when all three of them give him the puppy eyes he can't deny

I imagine one of their daughters is super into sports while the other one is artistic, just like their dads; John drives his kid to soccer practice every day and Gale pays for music lessons or art lessons

They try very hard to make sure their daughters know how much they're loved, repeat it so much every day, go to all events and parties and just spoil them so so much (don't worry, they're not brats, John and Gale still know how to dole out punishment when necessary)

When they get older, maybe middle or high school, Gale still helps them with their hair for dances and dates and things, while John always jokes with them about boys

Gale's the dad that always helps with homework and stuff like that while John is the dad that helps with friend or boy troubles

omg Gale and John would cry so hard at their graduations, their little girls are all grown up and leaving the nest and they just get so soft and weepy at the thought

aww this was very sweet, thank you for the ask anon! lmk if y'all have anymore clegan dad hcs!!

[deconstructthesoup]

Some more thoughts and considerations for the Dead Boy Detectives noir AU (original post here):

-I've decided that this takes place in 1935, which means that Edwin and Charles will both be, well, thirty-five---if we're setting this story in the early twentieth century, it only seems fair that Edwin should still have been born in 1900, and Charles should be around his age. The differences in the way that Edwin and Charles talk come down more to their differences in upbringing, as Edwin grew up in a posh family and Charles's family was more working-class. (I think the girls, by contrast, are probably in their late twenties---less experience than the boys, but with just as much grit.)

-Honestly, the timeline works out perfectly, because it's endlessly easy to replace the "Edwin was in Hell" storyline with a "Edwin was in WWI" storyline. I think he got drafted as soon as he was of age---early in 1918, since he's a January boy---and managed to hold on for those final eleven months before the war finally ended. He still has nightmares and flashbacks from that time, and while he doesn't pretend that he's not affected by it, he doesn't really let people help him through it. (Charles managed to avoid the draft due to running away from home on his eighteenth birthday, and it's pretty difficult to sign up for the military when you're a missing person.)

-Since Edwin and Charles are a) alive, and b) well into their thirties in this story, their agency is simply called "Payne & Rowland Investigations." There was much debate over whose name should go first, but they wound up settling on just going by alphabetical order.

-Tragic Mick runs a pawn shop about a block away from the agency, and while he's very much the kind of guy who likes to keep his head down and stay out of other people's business, he also happens to be kind and calming enough that people wind up telling him their stories anyway, which means that he usually knows a lot of random little secrets. Edwin and Charles tend to visit him whenever they're in need of a lead on a new case, and while Tragic Mick knows better than to give them anything too specific, the little tidbits he offers usually send them in the right direction.

-The Night Nurse is the head editor at Crystal's paper, and the one who keeps her on the society pages instead of letting her take the more investigative side of things. This is mainly because she's very focused on making sure that the paper continues to receive funding and doesn't ruffle any bigwig's feathers, but it's also because the Night Nurse doesn't really take Crystal that seriously---she's got movie stars for parents and still has hints of her "spoiled rich girl" past in the way she interacts with the world, so she genuinely believes that writing about society gossip is where Crystal's talents are best served.

-While Niko's perfectly happy with her job as a secretary, especially since Edwin and Charles have no problem inviting her onto the cases, she dreams of someday becoming a well-known novelist, and is more than a little inspired by her adventures with the detectives when it comes to actually getting her stories down. In fact, I've actually been toying with the idea that that's how she and Crystal met---they were college roommates who had the same writing class, Niko kept on attempting to bond with Crystal despite her very much being in her mean, party-girl era, and after Crystal wound up in an incredibly harmful relationship and realized that she needed to pull the plug, Niko helped her through it, cementing their status as genuine friends. And, well... maybe, throughout the years, they wound up becoming something a little bit more.

-Jenny is the bartender at the Cat King's nightclub---which I'm still debating a name for, though I am leaning towards "Pussycat" because, well, reasons---and she also happens to be his closest friend, in that achellian/sapphic solidarity way where you're bitching at each other constantly but unquestionably have each other's backs. They've known each other for years, they're in business together, she did a lot of the bootlegging during Prohibition... hell, they even got married for tax benefits, even though both of them are very open and honest about their sexualities. And unfortunately for Charles, Jenny is very tight-lipped about the Cat King's secrets.

-Charles was the first person that Edwin came out to, when they were sixteen, and he was also one of the only people in Edwin's life to accept that part of him unconditionally. On the flip side, Charles has always assumed that he was straight, but in the past year or so, he's been questioning his sexuality... and though Edwin knows about this, Charles still hasn't told him that he's part of the reason he had that realization. As it stands, they're only partners in the business sense---though, that'll be changing soon if their secretary and her reporter friend have anything to say about it.

-Anything I tell you about Esther and Monty is a spoiler. I might wind up writing this. You must not know.

-I've been debating whether or not I want to include the original characters I made for Put Your Records On in this story to better flesh out the world---at the very least, include Cecil and their girlfriend Alice, since they seem to have backdoored their way into becoming Dead Boy Detectives OCs---and I'm still not quite sure. I mean, for one, it'd be cool to have, say, Laura as a librarian who helps the detective agency out with research every now and then, but on the other hand, they're all very much tailored to that specific story... so, I guess you'll just have to see. (Though, I have an excellent idea for Arasha that I don't think I can ignore.)

And that's what I got for now!

[artisanoftheredscience]

Hello Fallen London Tumblr. The brainworms got me, so I present to you: my Fallen London PCs as Pokemon trainers and what their teams would be. 

Note that I am categorically not good at Pokemon so if these are terrible teams combat wise... just know that I have struggled to beat Pokemon Black back in the day and I have never gotten any better. 

Here's a cut because I wrote a lot haha. Also, note Light Spoilers for all 4 Ambitions and the Railway Storyline under the cut!

DR. STONE 

Is it cheating to make your thief OC a Dark Type trainer? Yes. I'm doing it anyway though because it fits him. If there was a Pokemon game set in the Neath, I think he'd be a shady npc who gives the players TMs in exchange for help with heists :). He has lots of sneaky pokemon, but also he's got a fairy edge to his team, perfect for a Silverer and a charming but underhanded little guy like him.

TEAM COMP: Zorua, Thievul, Sylveon, Mimikyu, Hatterene, Sneasel. 

That Thievul was his first pokemon for sure. I imagine he got her while on his own for the first time and he loves her so, so much. Thievel's tiny little paws are perfect crime tools. He considers her his 'real family' and the two of them are never far apart. Thievul takes on a leadership role among his pokemon and often picks up the smaller 'mons when they're misbehaving.

Zorua and Sneasel were next; they're a bonded pair and they love pranks and mischief. They were probably pre-Neath, perhaps pokemon he met while running his cons through England and trained for helping him with them.  I think Zorua shapeshifts into more 'respectable' pokemon when they're running the doctor con. Sneasel makes a very cute distraction. When not working, Sneasel naps constantly, usually curled up around Stone's neck. Zorua and Thievul fight all the time but they're best friends.

 He adopted Mimikyu shortly after the end of his adventures in Light Fingers (whatever the hell happens in this version anyways) and is very attached to it. I like to think he sees himself in the little guy. I also think he channels a lot of his grief from [REDACTED FOR SPOILERS] into raising him. Mimikyu loves to jump from hiding spots to scare people. He's also everyone's favorite little guy. Stone's friends spoil him rotten, honestly.

Hatterene + Sylveon arrive probably during the Railway board. I think Hatterene's a post divorce pokemon. The idea of a guy going through a divorce adopting a pokemon who explicitly DESPISES negative emotions is very funny to me. Truly self-sabotaging in every way possible. Although, Hatterene genuinely does care for Stone, and often can be seen dragging him to bed when he's overworking. She and Peculiar's Delphox are good friends and when their trainers are hanging out, they always play together. And lastly, Sylveon was an Eevee Peculiar gifted him, and he was such a doting pokeparent it evolved in like a week. Sylveon loves to give 'gifts' that are usually just dead rats, but everyone pretends to appreciate them anyway. Except for Thievul, who actually does enjoy the gifts and eats them happily. Of all the pokemon, Sylveon is also the one that dotes on Stone's kids the most.

DETECTIVE PECULIAR

If I say that a Nemesis PC would be a Ghost type trainer, you'd probably get it. Peculiar, however, I think would have a fun little character arc, where she'd start off with one Ghost type pokemon, and then slowly over the course of Neathy Pokemon game, end up being a Psychic based trainer. Something about the great game and detective work? Idk it's so important to me. I think she'd act as a friendly rival type npc, battling the trainer every so often and helping them with their quests. 

TEAM COMP: Froslass, Cofagrigus, Gothitelle, Gardevoir, Delphox, Musharna. 

Cofagrigus was her first pokemon. She'd likely only ever had family pokemon beforehand, but while investigating her wife's death... well, this little guy (in his pre-evolution form) started following her around. She was wary of him at first, but the two are close as can be these days. I like to think he's an investigative boon because he can investigate things and places Peculiar can't, being a ghost and all.

She met Gothitelle during the Tomb Colonies arc, and she speaks to her like she's a little person. They drink tea together and everything. She's Peculiar's most sociable pokemon. Delphox is from the Iron Republic! I think he helped keep her emotionally stable during that actual nightmare. Delphox has a 'wise old woman' energy to her, and of Peculiar's pokemon, is definitely the one in charge.

Froslass came during a certain part of Nemesis. If you know you know. I think of all her pokemon, Froslass is the least social, but also *extremely* overprotective. She's given people frostbite for looking at Peculiar or her other pokemon wrong. I also think she absolutely *hates* Liz for some reason. They fight like siblings.

I think Gardevoir came to her as a tiny Ralts, a gift from Stone after he finished his own ambition. She kept Peculiar moving during the torture that was Knifegate, and I think helps manage some of her physical symptoms that develop as a result of all the fucked up things she puts her body through in that ambition. She's also a real clingy 'mon and Peculiar can't leave the house without her. Musharna is her railway pokemon, and I think they're likely from the missing block. They like to eat the dreams of her other pokemon, and hilariously also chases Stone around whenever they see him, because that man is a walking ambient buffet to a dream-eater. 

LIZ O'CONNOR

He's an odd one; I feel like the Monster Hunters in London function as Pokemon Rangers in a sense? I think his theme is less type based and more cool looking pokemon. I think he differs from most Monster Hunters in that he doesn't use a lot of the obvious hunting pokemon, and he's more a fan of personalities than anything else. I think he'd definitely be a rival encounter in any pokemon game.

TEAM COMP: Luxray, Galarian Zigzagoon, Bisharp, Tinkaton, Ceruledge, Lucario. 

The Galarian Zigzagoon is just what they look like in the Neath to me. I think oddly as the only unevolved pokemon, this is also's Liz's oldest; he's had it since he was a small child. It's got the same lovable rogue energy he did growing up. It loves to chew on shoes, though, so it's not allowed to roam unsupervised. Luxray is also a pre-Ambition pokemon. I think Liz found it hiding in a basement while he was rat-catching and it followed him home. It's extremely ill-behaved and temperamental, but Liz fucking loves it to pieces. He is... not a great trainer when it comes to convincing his pokemon to be polite.

Lucario + Bisharp were both obtained during BAL. I think Lucario just showed up while Liz was recovering from the first Vake encounter- he was in his pre-evolved form and just crawled in through the window, drawn in by the Mandrake's  whining and the Smell Of Blood. He's a little gentleman, though- I think of all LIz's pokemon, he's the defacto leader. Bisharp was acquired during the build up to the final confrontation- Liz was working on making his weapon, and found the little guy trying to steal knives. He's a biter, but he's also extremely affectionate. 

Tinkaton came along post-Ambition, as did Ceruledge. Ceruledge was adopted to match a gift pokemon they gave Spring- the two are very close and they often drag their owners to see one another. Ceruledge is one of the more chatty pokemon, and makes constant vocalizaitons. He is not allowed on stealth missions. Tinkaton was wandering near the construction site for the third station and Liz Loved That Thing immediately. It's his baby. It's not allowed near Ellison's Corviknight, though, no matter how much it craves violence. It loves to dismantle furniture to steal metal screws and pieces for its hammer, so it is also not allowed to be unsupervised.

SPRING LOVELACE

This one came to me quite easily. I think she's like, a gym trainer of sorts. She does Pokemon Performances during the day with these fancy plays and all sorts of costuming for them as Lady Lovelace, and that at night runs a game hall as Madame Spring. 

TEAM COMP: Bellosom, Armarouge, Polteageist, Tsareena, Noivern, Bewear 

Tsareena and Bellosom were the first pokemon she trained- they're a bonded pair. I think they were surface pokemon she brings down to the Neath with her. She shows them off when she's Among Society and she's quite proud of them. I think Bellosom is the clingier of the two and demands to be held at all hours. Tsareena is a little more aloof, but she adores Liz and will sit on his shoulders at any opportunity. 

Poltageist became part of her team when she first moved to the Neath. She went into a shop to buy a new tea-set and one of the cups was this little guy. He's great for spywork because she can set him on the table and no one notices as long as he stays still and quiet. Bewear is from the Carnival. She started working there on the weekends and this little one showed up and started doing tricks next to her. She was taken immediately and has raised her into a fine pet. Bewear is a big softie and likes to smother people with affection. Poltageist steals keys when people aren't looking. 

Noivern is a post ambition addition to her crew; she thinks having a bat pokemon is hilarious. Noivern is the most standoffish and ill-tempered, but adores his pokesiblings and will bite anyone who messes with them. And Armarouge was a gift pokemon from Liz- the two of them have a matched set of pokemon. Spring taught it to play cards and it is shockingly good at it. 

ELLISON ARROW 

And here we have our pokemon professor! He's definitely studying some rare Neathy pokemon phenomena. He's got the vibe of like, a secondary professor a la Sonia in Sword and Shield who is more focused on research than giving out pokemon. 

TEAM COMP: Maushold, Corviknight, Heliolisk, Stoutland, Umbreon, Ambipom. 

I think Ambipom's actually his first pokemon, surprisingly. A mischevious little monkey who just wants to pull pranks? That's a kid's first 'mon right there. Probably got a revolutionary bent to them, because this is still London! Imagine a bomb-flinging Ambipom. Pretty sick, right? Ambipom is his rock and closest friend and I think a generally very sweet guy. I think Maushold is his Uni 'I accidentally fed a stray animal too much and now its mine now' moment, and I think he loves them despite pretending otherwise. Maushold is a weird hivemind pokemon but the individual mice do have personalities. The parent is a sweet, affectionate little guy who likes to ride in Ellison's coat-pockets. The two kids are tiny mischeif makers- they're most often found on Ambipom's back, helping it load bombs. The smaller twin likes to chew on shoelaces. 

Heliolisk and Stoutland were both additions to the team during his first few years in the lab. Heliolisk's itty-bitty hands are great for fixing machines. She has a massive sweet-tooth, and his lab assistants and students often bribe her for help on assignments. For some reason Heliolisk can mimic Ellison's handwriting and often is asked to forge his signature. Stoutland is a very loyal and sweet dog. It's great for identifying chemicals and bones because of its sharp nose. It's almost a 'nanny dog' for the other pokemon and often keeps them out of trouble. 

Corviknight came around after his time with the railway, having been acquired during the construction of probably the first or second station. Ellison rides it to work sometimes to the shock of most of his colleagues. He's also taught it to drop bombs and packages for rev work. Its a weirdly smart pokemon.  And Umbreon's a very special pokemon from a certain incident involving a mirror and a sudden addition to the group :) Ellison has mixed feelings about him, but treats him well regardless. He's a very energetic little guy and loves to dance and jump around.

KENDRICK STARLEE 

Kendrick's definitely some sort of Pokemon Competition professional. She just loves cute pokemon and loves dressing them up and teaching them how to perform. But also, she's a train enthusiast and an accomplished mechanic, so that's reflected in her team as well. 

TEAM COMP: Polteageist, Eldegoss, Lurantiss, Klinklang, Magnezone, Goodra. 

Eldegoss is her oldest pokemon! She received her from her parents as a pet as a little girl, and it's been her closest friend ever since. Truly, it's been by her side through *everything*. Her performing days? It was there for every practice and performance. Her studies? It pulled the all-nighters with her. That time her fiance [REDACTED BY THE MINISTRY OF PUBLIC DECENCY] and left her to deal with the fallout? It was there to comfort her. That is her BEST FRIEND baby! They're basically never apart from one another, and Eldegoss also mothers all the other pokemon in the group. 

Lurantiss is a pokemon she recieved in her performing days. She's a very elegant dancer and Kendrick often dresses her up and takes her to pokemon competitions. She's a little darling, and adores people. She gets along very well with the other pokemon on Kendrick's team and often is found 'dressing them up' by putting flowers and mushrooms in their fur/on their heads or trying to put clothes on them. She's a cutie-pie. 

Klinklang and Magnezone were both acquired when she made the switch over to engineering following her performance retiring. Klinklang is a smart guy, with a bright mind. He likes to sit in her lap while she does equations or fixes machinery. Magnezone was adopted after one of her fellow students fucked off to Zee and abandoned her. She took her in and has spent every moment since loving her to bits. Magnezone loves to eat wiring, though, so she has to keep an eye on her while she's doing other work. The pair are very close, and they're always together. 

 I think Polteageist was an 'oopsie' catch- she thought she'd bought a normal tea-set and then woke up to a cute ghost pokemon demanding treats. He's definitely the clingiest of her 'mons. Her Polteageist is best friends with Spring's. I actually think because they recieved their 'mons the same way, that the two of them might have gotten them at the same time. They're cute besties. And Goodra is a railway pokemon! But not in the same way as the others. What *actually* happens is that while the main cast is doing work at Station VII, there's an itty bitty chemical spill. When she goes off to investigate it, she finds Goodra trying to get in there and eat the spilled chemicals. She adopts him almost immediately. Goodra is a silly friend, and enjoys a good meal. It loves helping her in the kitchen, and two cook a lot of meals together. 

SAM 

Sam's a horrible mirror creature, and I imagine there's a sense to them that they are closer to a Pokemon than a human. Like being a therian except that the language for that didn't exist at all. I also think that they're the sort of pokemon trainer to be extremely lax about training, so his pokemon are a lot closer to their wild counterparts. Sam doesn't have a full team because he's much newer to having pokemon than his friends.

TEAM COMP: Espeon, Deino, Impidimp.

Espeon appeared from the mirror at the same time Sam did! It's a fucked up little guy. It and Ellison's Umbreon have a similar weird/strained relationship as Sam and Ellison. Espeon uses its psychic abilities to help Sam with the mirror nightmares/headaches, and Sam rewards it with lots of treats. Espeon is very, very spoiled. It spends a lot of time grooming the other pokemon on the team and takes pride in its appearance.

Deino was found rooting through the garbage outside Liz's place, and Sam adopted him when he bit through his arm. Sam loves his rabid little friend, even if he can't quite get it to stop exploring everything with his teeth. Strangely, other pokemon seem to be drawn to Deino- whenever the gang hangs out, there's always a small clump of 'mons gathered around Deino. Impidimp was an accidental catch. He climbed into some guy's basement to catch him because he was illegally removing endangered species of Pokemon from the Wild and selling them on the Black Market. Most of the pokemon were released back into their natural habitats or sent to people who knew how to handle them if they were unfit to return to nature... but Imipidimp refused to leave Sam. Like they tried and it did not work. So he got a new 'mon! Imipidimp is a little more subdued than one would expect, but he's been taught how to pick locks and he loves to steal watches. 

CAPTAIN BELL 

As the big bad zee captain of the group, I think he's probably the most familiar with the real dangerous sorts of wild 'mons. He loves them though! I think he really stresses to his crew the importance of respecting the zee's pokemon and rails hard against the practices that cause them harm them both from other sailors and the people back on land. Plus, Ellison is his closest confidante, so I imagine he knows a lot. I think a player interacting with him would be able to learn a lot of neat little secrets and tricks for raising their team :)  Bell has only two pokemon- this is because he's always out to Zee, and doesn't have the space or time to care for many 'mons. He's the unofficial second trainer for all of Ellison's pokemon, though, and spends a lot of time caring for them when he's back in London. 

TEAM COMP: Cramorant, Gabite. 

Cramorant was Bell's first ever 'mon. He picked them up while he was at Zee. The tiny little thing landed on his head on his first nightshift and refused to leave. They're best friends. Cramorant often takes to the sky during working hours to keep watch, and Bell talks to them like a little person. Cramorant adores Ellison's Stoutland and when Bell is on land, the two are constantly together. Gabite is a more recent addition. He found it trying to eat supplies in the hull of his ship, and took it in. Gabite loves to be held despite being a huge pokemon, and Bell has gotten used to doing things while carrying a massive guy around in his arms. Forks and Hive love it, and spend a whole lot of time sneaking its snacks no matter how often the adults discourage them from overfeeding it.

[pedrocomicreviews]

Exceptional X-Men #7

"... truest loves."

I miss good X-Men comics too, Emma. You're holding down the fort with your own beautiful hands.

Can I just say, the whole conversation about whether or not this issue's cover and solicit spoils the story is stupid? And I don't mean people are stupid for having the conversation, I mean the idea that this isn't the case is dumb-- this storyline was absolutely fucked over by editorial, the fucking cover spoils the last page twist. It was done because they didn't expect the book to sell by itself and wanted people to look into it by knowing it's the Mister Sinister book.

Which is fine, you do what you gotta do, this is one of the good books and I'm happy to know it's been renewed, but don't piss on me and tell me it's rain, man. Of course it's a spoiler, the story is written assuming I didn't see it coming. Why the hell would you even pretend otherwise?

Anyway, as far as the actual book-- behold! The book that didn't have anyone who likes or hates Xavier enough in it, so they couldn't find a way to add him to the story. This is listed as "Collateral Damage" in the X-Manhunt list and I gotta say, that's generous. It has nothing to do with the plot of that book and it's honestly kind of hilarious how it actually connects-- someone comes in and says "Hey there's a crossover episode happening in every other book!", only for every character to either go "How come they didn't tell us?!" or, hysterically, "Who's Xavier?".

And that's precious, isn't it? I mean, the idea that these children who were absolutely alive when Xavier went into people's minds and said HUMANS OF EARTH, WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING THE WORLD CHANGED don't know who he is is just not possible; it's like not knowing Insert Current President here. But the thought that the world has moved on so far and so fast in about 15 weeks that mutants don't even know who Charles Xavier is has kinda endeared me to this take.

Because it's still mostly a book about the New X-Men (original title of the book, even! But that title doesn't sell, so it's Exceptional now) finding their way and their boundaries, and what they think the world should be. And the idea that they only political north in that journey are Kitty Pryde, Emma Frost and now Mister Sinister is genuinely engaging. I really kind of wish more of the franchise could have been like this, and the post-Krakoa status quo is perfect to raise a generation (even if it's just like, three people) outside of the usual husband dichotomy most mutants were raised in.

Which doesn't quite make it fun when the book, as pleasant as it is, is still not clear on what it's about as far as a plot goes. Mister Sinister is obviously the villain and the new mutants-no-trademark will eventually fight him, and probably a bunch of clones. But they don't really care? They don't really have any relationship to him aside from Alejandro being conned by the guy, and that's like, the normal thing Mister Sinister does.

I do hope Kitty and Emma get big moments with Sinister before #10, and I do hope this means we're starting to get a little more radicalized, a little more serious. Technically speaking, since this isn't New X-Men, we have no idea what an "Exceptional X-Men" book is like, and I'm curious if they actually manage to carve something new with the way they engage with old and new villains. Here's hoping, and here's also hoping we get more new characters to join the main party.

Either that or we're entering a collision course with the Outcasts or whatever they're called over at Uncanny X-Men. Emma perks up when there's horses to be killed, it's comedy gold waiting to happen.

Before I go-- god, I really, really wish the upcoming Emma Frost book was about her as she is right now, and not a Hellfire Club nostalgia mini. Her opening thoughts about how she's always on the side of protecting people, taking them away from harm, only for fascists to burn every single haven she's ever built, is everything I wanted out of Exceptional. I was hoping we were going to explore that much more often, but understood that it's not possible in a team book. Oh well, at least we got a good splash out of it for the previews.

Sigh. Happiness was an island, man.

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

Shuichi & Kaito's fall-out post-game

So Kai talking about his hc is what lead to this

Kai: every once in a while i think about what if Kaito realized he has no actual fucking clue who Shuichi really is. like he considers him his friend and insists he knows alot about him, but one day he realizes that a large chunk of what he "knows" about Shuichi is either assumptions he came up with and forgot were assumptions, or are things Shuichi masks with and aren't really true about him. i just love the idea of Kaito suddenly getting his whole view on Shuichi shattered and having to totally reevaluate how to be his friend

[timeskip]

Hina: Kaito isn't a bad friend but man sjsksksk

in my heart of hearts (in which Kaito goes to hell no matter what) he is tho, I think he'd get in denial about it instead [the convo has been going in the direction of Kaito trying to get to know him for real & prove himself as a friend], and most likely try to instill in Shuichi and everyone that he knows better and Shuichi is the person he made up in his head, just like he did with Maki right after meeting her, with the whole trying to force her to be the girly girl he thinks she should be in canon. Like, Kaito at his core is an only child who was spoiled by his grandparents and never told no, he thinks the world spins which way he'll wish it to

Hina: I think Kaito is a bad friend in canon, 100% but for me personally, I usually pick and choose what parts of Kaito I like to keep lmao This is a postgame headcanon, but after the game I'd like to think he's one of Kokichis biggest advocates, even more so than Shuichi There's a small difference between the moment where Kaito says he's not sure if Kokichi was lying and postgame And it's Kaito actively dying for the rest of the class It's one thing to say you're dying to save everyone, it's another thing to actually commit and do it I think in a postgame scenario, where Kaito actually has had to confront those final moments before his death and realize exactly what a "heroic sacrifice" means, it changes his opinion completely He might not agree with the actions Kokichi took to get there, but the fact that given the choice, he chose to lay down his life to put a stop to the game. He wants to believe that's for everyone else. He can't fathom the idea that anyone who does that could possibly be selfish

oh, if it's post-game it's worse on Shuichi angle tho, I get that he [Kaito] could change his mind about Kokichi after this (he'd have trouble admitting it tho), but for Shuichi it means that the mess of 4th trial and what followed happened between them

you can't tell me he wasn't impacted long-term after, actually they both should feel betrayed, Kaito did openly show that to him this was Shuichi turning against him and was ready to cut him off and lead the group against him, but Shuichi crawled back to him like the wet dog he is, I want post-game Shuichi hesitate before disagreeing with Kaito on something minor and then let himself finally feel hurt over this

when it hits him that he can't pretend it's all fine because they made up and that he has outgrown the need for hero-Kaito and is now letting him stifle him because he got used to being under his shoulder

Sini: Yeah, Kaito did him dirty. I get that Kaito felt betrayed, but Kaito was so pissed at him and for what? For arguing against him when he turned out right? For accusing Gonta even though it was a class trial? Or… Given that Kaito admitted to being jealous of Shuichi…. Was it all because of jealousy? Is he still jealous even now? Kaito apologized yet Shuichi is still playing the sidekick to Kaito’s hero as if everything is still the same

I want the realization that they're not fine to hurt him like a bitch, I want him to be just trying to wish it away, asking for it to go back to the way it was at the start, because he still hates confrontation and is more tired than ever and is still scared of not having a hero, doubting himself per usual, he still needs Kaito, doesn't he? (all he needs is a friend)

Ves: shuuichi just wants ONE thing to stay stable but alas

Sini: He is both angry and wants to lash out yet wants to keep things as is. He’s mad at Kaito but also wants him to still be his friend

and I think Kaito would only double down on being a hero post-game, because surely everyone needs one right now, somebody to still put on the cheerful act and give them something to look forward (he refuses to notice how denying equal ground & mutual support is fucking up everyone in the training trio and honestly anyone who cares about him)

also if he just believes strongly enough he'll be fine eventually

and there's parallel to Kokichi probably also doubling down on his act, hoping they'll leave him to rot (think "I'm damaged, far too damaged"/lyrics)

Ves: the idea of kokichi doubling down on his act postgame makes me ILL get up boy i am outside your door w hot cocoa and a therapy dog

(thinking back to Barely a Planet, Barely Pluto) he can get the dog, but you're not entering his isolation tower, this poisoning attempt has been thwarted

[thegeminisage]

tng update time, brief because i am BUSY. two nights ago we caught "contagion" together, yesterday i watched "the royale" on my own, and just now i finished "time squared."

contagion: don't know why this one was recced by so amny people because it was VERY boring. because it had romulans in it? it's not even unwatchably bad or anything, i just...didn't care

did like that the romulan commander was a woman though. just like the enterprise incident. where's spock when you need him

the archaeology angle was stupid. "oooh i have to go i've been studying them since i was a lad" you literally do not have to go "well china was thought to be only a myth until marco polo traveled there" bitch, not to the fucking chinese. get a grip.

the fakeout data death...girl we know he's going to be fine! i did like him throwing geordi around though he made the little faces <3 and i was very proud of him for continuing to work when he had a little computer virus. aw. maybe less glad that picard didn't give him any extra priase for doing so but whatever we can't have high expectations for this ep

anyway it was all just very overly contrived. and i was bored.

the royale: this had a great setup because i love when star trek talks about nasa. that made me really excited for what turned out to ultimately be a holodeck episode

played this one on 2x speed genuinely (my deepest dishonor - bad ones get 1.25x, really bad ones get 1.5x, and horrible ones alone get 2x speed)

like, if you changed it a little, you could say the holodeck is broken and won't let you out until you pretend to be investors and win big in the casino! it's the same thing. i guess they didn't want people thinking the holodeck was dangerous and unreliable, which it is

anyway, i liked data blowing on the dice. that was all though

time squared: this one blew my tits clean off. amazing. 10/10. it's like the immunity syndrome, enemy within, and doomsday machine had a time traveling baby

there is like a little bit of time travel technobabble that makes no sense whatsoever. and i did get the final twist spoiled for me. but it doesn't MATTER. neither of those things mattered because i was still sitting there with my jaw on the ground after the end

like, one website called this one confusing. sure yeah a little bit. they were playing very fast and loose with both their own rules established in the episode and the greater rules of the franchise as a whole. but the point is the character arc

like. picard sees himself make a decision that will destroy his ship. he sees himself fail utterly to do everything he holds sacred - he did not even GO DOWN with his ship. he is facing a matt decker doomsday machine of a situation. remember when kirk pitied matt decker because he saw his whole crew die and was helpless to stop it but was also a little put off by him because he couldn't possibly imagine himself in that situation? but with picard IT IS himself. it's green shirt john crichton and black shirt john crichton. they're BOTH the real picard but one of them has been through something unimaginably horrible

AND WHEN THAT PICARD. ENDANGERS THE SHIP. like. IN COLD BLOOD our picard chooses to kill him. and in my personal interpretation he thinks of it as mercy. but like he still shot him while looking directly at him and NO ONE knows what he did because he DIDNT TELL THEM except he called the fucking doctor for some reason

like at the end he's just staring out of a window. and riker is like hi im here to let you talk about it! and picard doesn't talk about it and riker goes away and in the end he is just staring out of the fucking window and they just ROLL CREDITS a real "anyway! these are the voyages of the starship enterprise" of a situation aka what i always loved about tos episodes (honorific)

i THINK this is a cross-section of drag me to hell and there was no laugh track but further contemplation required. straight banger i fucking loved it

i still have to do "the icaurs factor" and "pen pals" alone, but then we get to do "q who" together WHICH IS THE BORG EPISODE i cannot wait. nobody tell me ANYTHING.

[castlebyersafterdark]

Especially as a gay guy who with no hesitation crushed on so many straight male celebs without an ounce of whatever the hell this girl's mindset was. They're never going to meet you, let alone propose marriage!!

wow that story about your friend was so interesting! i imagine such a formative part of growing up queer is these 'hopeless' crushes, so why does her (straight) scenario hinge on whether they could actually be together? its as though her fantasy hinged on a glimmer of possibility. on hope. hmmm.

i think when we play pretend, even as kids, there's this impossibly simultaneous belief of two opposite things: that its both real and not real. the key is that they are balanced and both true somehow - so i could daydream about billie joe armstrong from this one magazine poster pasted on my bedroom wall for years but i def knew i wouldnt and probs didnt even want to meet him! i mean, i was like 13 and he was an adult, which kids now are freaking out about, but i didnt think twice about crushing on him because i wasnt hoping to meet or actually marry him lol.

but i guess today with social media where we can glimpse these people's lives, our fantasies become more 'possible' and the real-not real balance gets thrown out of whack. honestly i think it either spoils the fantasy (oh no theyre human after all) or it makes people believe they could actually be friends with celebs (because theyre human! yay!)... and like, yeah, technically, but when i see people saying 'i just need to meet them and we'd be besties' it always makes me cringe, because parasocial relationships make people forget that relationships really really are two-sided. and your fav celeb might just not... like you that much. or they might just be a bit boring irl for more than the length of a tiktok video lol.

idk, i've worked in jobs where i've met a fair share of celebs i admire from many different fields, and its amazing, the difference between idea of them and the presence they have in person. after that i decided i didnt like to meet my heroes because the imbalance felt so weird to me.

so maybe your friend knowing this guy was gay, it ruined her balance of real-not real make believe. whereas i assume you, knowing you were having gay crushes on straight dudes from a young age (</3), probably had this self awareness and so your fantasies hinged on something other than possibility. did you also like any celebs who were rumoured about, like prince or bowie? as i recall there was some ambiguous sexuality in the 00s alt scene, but who knows how much was for show? (mcr springs to mind)

Yeah, I definitely think it's very common across the board for a lot of people that once something interferes with their fantasy, it just breaks them a little. Which I always just find so odd because celebrity crushes are so far from reality so why does it matter so much?? Absolutely different if it's someone you know irl, you're into them, and then you either find out they have a SO, they're not sexually compatible, or they just... don't want you haha. Add a very thick layer of 'they'll never want you' to celebrities because while yes, famous people do get with non famous people, you crushing on someone famous as you go about your day to day normal life is a lot different than a random encounter that is so rare it's not even worth mentioning as logic to this situation. People get upset when they find out the celeb they like is dating someone. Or they come out. Or whatever. The make-believe really warps some people. (This could be a whole discussion on the rabid Mlvn fan issue, as a meltdown on the verge due to their ship sinking and their ideal fantasy world centered on Mike/El crumbling down, breaking their brains)

For example, I've made it pretty clear I have a big gay embarrassing crush on Finn. What does it matter though haha I will never meet that man. Don't want to, and I'm also very happy and smitten and secure in my personal life. It's just normal human attraction. Talent and being hot is appealing. I'm just a random fan. Same as everyone else! I could talk for hours about the parasocial epidemic but you said enough so I'll let that one sit. Also, I don't think I'd like him less if it turns out he's straight. Still follow his career. Still think he's fine as hell. I'll just probably like him more if he's on this side. That's my honest take.

And totally sad for kids that their peers and people older than them are promoting this thought-crime culture that it's weird or wrong to fantasize about other people, especially those older. That's just life!! It doesn't mean anything. It's admiration, it's aspirational, it's learning about yourself.

And to your last point, I can't remember all my crushes when I was young, mostly actors in shows or movies rather than musicians. Bowie and Prince would have been too old for me to even give a second thought about haha but I'm sure they were so validating for people a little further back, unless this just meant like them. I mean there were celebs that were out or who were rumored of course, but the biggest one I can think of was Lee Pace, esp during the height of the Hobbit filming. I was really into those movies in high school. He had rumors, which turned out to be true! So, there's an example that worked out actually.

This is kinda embarrassing now but my dream man growing up was Shaun White. Memory lane stuff right there, goddddd 🫣🤣

[countlessrealities]

So... how does it feel to be so involved with Adam's egg? Motherhood jokes aside. Does Charlie know yet?

Unprompted questions || Accepting !

Oh Lord, here it comes.

Vaggie wants to be mad at Adam for shoving her in the spotlight, but she knows she can't. He has already gotten her out of an awkward position once already, even at the cost of giving people more material to harass him. She feels like she owes him to at least share whatever comes with the whole egg ordeal.

"I...uh, it's not easy to explain it," she starts after a few moments of silence, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. "I mean, I'm really invested in it, I'm not even sure of why, but...I guess I feel protective of Hesta because they're going to be yet another angel to grow up in Hell. I know what that feels like and...it sucks if you don't have the right people around."

If Charlie hadn't found her back then...She doesn't even want to think about what might have happened. What her life could have been like.

"I want them to be safe. To have a good environment to grow up into...as much as that can happen in this literal dumpster on fire. Like...the Hotel. That would be perfect."

However, that means that Adam would have to accept to come live with them too, and that's still one big work-in-progress.

"I never thought about having kids, I never wanted them, but...I'm also glad that this one fell in my lap? 'Cause...it's a chance for me to do something good. Besides, Charlie is amazing aunt material, so she should get the chance to have a niece or a nephew to spoil."

There's also another side to all this, though. Namely, her and Adam. Their carefully mending relationship, the heavy, bitter shadow of how they have parted ways.

"But...It's also weird. Because this isn't just any egg, it's Adam's egg and...He and I have some complicated history." And isn't that the biggest understatement of the century. "We've been getting along lately, but...I'm not sure if..."

Her voice trails off. She doesn't even know what she wants to say. The truth is that she has so many contrasting emotions when it comes to her former best friend and she doesn't know where to start from to process them.

The best thing she can do is leave it as it is. At least while she can afford it.

"I miiiight not have told Charlie about it yet," she starts once again, with a nervous chuckle. "She doesn't know about...well, my plan to bring Adam to live with us. Or about my clashes with Vox. Or whatever he and Alastor are doing with each other."

She means to tell her girlfriend everything at some point, but she still hasn't found the right moment to do it.

Well, almost everything. She won't tell her about that one night she spent at Vox's. Absolutely not. Nope. Never ever. It's too embarrassing. Besides, the two of them have agreed to pretend that it never happened to start with.

"She has so many things to deal with, I don't want to burden her with this too. I'll talk to her when I've made some proper progress. Now...it's still all too uncertain."

{ @creationtainted / @holoharbinger - mentioned }

[ms-cartoon]

Hello There!! :) Sorry to bother you but I just wanted to let you know that some leaks for future episodes of Helluva Boss, for EP 6 And 12 were just leaked on 4Chan and I wanted to know your thoughts if you saw them. I've seen them myself..and I've gotta say, this just made me more annoyed and made me just wanna avoid the show even more, it's so damn predictable and it's just more proof that the show refuses to put Stolas in the wrong and call him out on what he's done and make us feel bad for him, and he's just nothing but this "UWU baby. 😒🤦‍♀️ It's just so frustrating, I REALLY don't see this show getting any better and seeing these animatics for the future episodes of the season just proves my point.

Heck, sometimes I'm even wondering why HB needed to be made, yes it was obviously made to keep fans invested and entertained until Hazbin's arrival but this spinoff has just been a mess and all over the place, and relys on shipping to get the fans entertained + I feel like a spinoff should be able to stand on it's own without connecting to the show it's based on, ya know? It also just feels Viv isn't as passionate about HB as she is with HH, like HB the more I think about it, just feels like nothing but a cash grab and just there to keep fans invested, and it'd working since the fans will eat up anything from Viv. I'm not saying Viv and her team aren't passionate and hard work is shown with the Animation + Voice Acting, but everything else, especially the writing..isn't very good. Idk man, I just feel like HB is just a cash crab and such, at least with HH it has so much potential and something going for it and seems like a story Viv actually WANTS To tell and explore, which I hope it delivers. 🤞💙 But with HB, it's just all over the place and it went from a comedy show about assassin Imps to a romantic yaoi fanfic show, it's facts. I thought this show was called, "Helluva Boss" not "The Stolitz Show"/"The Stolas Show" This show just feels like a fanfiction and all it's emotional scenes feel emotionally manipulative too and just not earned, they're just there to make you feel for the characters. For example, remember how in EP 6 (Truth Seekers) It seems Blitz was gonna change for the better and try treating Moxxie better and stop being an asshole? Well, the next episode just completely throws Blitz "Depth" right out of the window and he goes back to his same ways and WE are apparently supposed to feel back for him, especially at the end of that episode..but I don't, because he did that to himself.

And while yes, it takes time for a character to grow and change, they still try putting effort in the process when it comes to redeeming and trying to better themselves and you slowly see them grow as time goes on, even if they slip up at times and it isn't easy. But with Blitz, it's like Viv and the writers completely forgot about the last episode, and his and Moxxie's so called "heart to heart" moment and just had him to continue being the same unlikeable, loud, annoying, creepy Boss that he's always been since the Pilot, and had him stalk his employees (ON THEIR ANNIVERSARY, BTW) just because it's funny.

(Let's not forget that HB pretty much spoiled HH and it's premise when it comes to Charlie's goal to redeem demons and help them get to Heaven. But it just seems pointless and just reckons HH, since Heaven is revealed to be just as bad Hell and it just makes Charlie's goal useless, tbh. Though, I like to pretend the C.H.E.R.B. EP doesn't exist, Lol.)

(I've mentioned beforehand that I really do use to enjoy and like the show a lot and was a fan, but things started to take a turn sometime after EP 3, where it went downhill for me and I saw a drop in quality. I rewatched the show and saw in-depth posts on here and just realized how bad some things are in the show and just how flawed it really was. I mean, when being a fan, I didn't really pay attention and just saw on flawed it was, plus I also stopped watching and left because of it's toxic and horrible fandom and how they attack and harass you if you say one negative thing on the show or their favorite ships, and say you're homophobic..which is ridiculous and just so sad, especially when some of these fans are adults, almost close to their 30's and yet act like children when not everyone blindly praises the show like they (and the majority of the fandom) do.)

Yes!! I have seen the leaks. Just now after you mentioned them. (I'm surprised it wasn't that hard to find them).

Honestly, Stolas existing as a character hardcore irks me at this point. Not gonna lie, lol! Just knowing this show is going to try its hardest to have us pity him or Blitzo, even when they don't even deserve it, frustrates me. For real!

I'm not gonna spill a drip of tea about the leaks, but from what I've seen so far (in some ways, in these specific scenes), let's just say it's similar to the last few episodes that were released. And if you read my rants, you'll know it'll be the same issues I've mentioned about this piece of crumbled mess we call a web show. At this point, I really am done with this show. Like, I'll still watch the show just to make fun of it, but my ratings for it will stay at an all-time LOW!

Yeah, I can pretty much tell from the first season that Viv's effort and determination for HB faltered completely and will probably never click again. It's no secret she's more invested in HH. I mean, it's fine if you wanna put more of your focus on the MAIN show you really wanted to release. It would actually make sense that her interest and effort for her spinoff fell drastically because she started paying more attention to HH (even if it is the main reason why it's terrible). I can tell at this point that she loves Hazbin Hotel a lot more than Helluva Boss (I mean, I do too. But that's not the point) However if you're going to make a spinoff just to keep your fans entertained enough to have patience for the big thing, at least put more effort in the plot and the potential the show could have. And I'm not just talking about the fans that will go ~~uwu gaga~~ or teary-eyed over everything that occurs in this mess as long as it keeps the ship going. I'm talking about the people that actually expect this show to make sense and have some good plot points!!

Pretty much all that you said is accurate! It can't be any more right than it already is.

For real, where the holy hell did the plot go!!?? What is the point of this show?? What lessons are being learned?? If there are any lessons learned, they should've been learned from the very beginning it became something serious instead of the characters going through the same repetitive sh*t only to not learn a damn thing. If I'm missing something, someone's gonna have to let me know! Cuz, my god! This show IS ALL OVER the place with its plot points! How are you gonna expect me to feel bad about any of these characters if they're never gonna learn their lesson? You can't just make a scene where they start to see the error of their ways and make it seem like they're going to try and change for the better only to completely forget about all that they learned (or are supposed to learn) just to act the same as they always been. Like, what was the point of that build-up? Where did all the potential go?? You mean to tell me all that was just some kind of filler episode that supposedly never happened???? NO! That's not how this works! You can't just do that??

It was supposed to be just a comedy. A sitcom about a bunch of assassins getting their job done. Fulfilling requests from every sinner to kill or get revenge on anybody in the living that did them wrong. We only had very few episodes containing that plot, only for it to turn into a drama and into a rom-com added with pointless drama so suddenly since episode 7.

And you raise a good point about the whole heaven thing. Charlie's goal just seems completely pointless since the cherub episode. In heaven, Angels are supposed to be seen as... well, the complete opposite of what the sinners and demons of hell are. We're supposed to see them as good people ( or angels?). The kind of people that do no wrong. Or probably have done some wrong but begged God for forgiveness so they earn their place in heaven (not really sure if it works like that. That's just based on my assumption and just seems to make sense). They could be considered really nice beings who hate committing felonies and only want to be good. But all we saw was a whole freakin' FACADE from the Cherubs!!! They just seemed sweet while only wanting to keep people alive. But later, they literally try to murder and fight these imps!! Cursing and even calling that old man sh*tty! Umm, WHAT?? Angels using bad words.... Is that even allowed?? Charlie wants to redeem every sinner... Okay, but what would be the point if they're just gonna act the same as they did in hell. They would just be keeping a whole facade to make themselves look good!

(What ever happened to those Cherubs after they got kicked out of heaven anyway?)

Yeah, Helluva Boss was enjoyable for a while. A short while actually. It wasn't perfect, but it was still enjoyable to watch. But unfortunately, it failed to be seen as one of the best shows I've seen. The plot is just not there anymore. The characters are terrible and fail at being characters. The jokes aren't even funny no more. They might as well be jokes for kids under 17 who just laugh at every single f bomb being dropped. The fans that do watch and enjoy this show might as well be a bunch of 12-year-olds if they don't even see one flaw it has. I'm sorry. But considering how toxic fans can get, I have every right to say this.

[m34gs]

What are your top 5 favourite platonic relationships in fiction?

Hi friend!!! Thank you for this ask! I'm so excited for this!!!!!! I had to do some errands earlier so I couldn't answer until now, and then when I had time I got so excited I just had to make myself a cup of tea first! So I shall sip my tea as I answer. Prepare for a Ramble. LOL. As usual, I will be listing this from Fifth to First, with my Top Favourite being last. Also, this list is gonna be HIGHLY subjective. :D Warning for potential spoilers ahead!

5th: Bokuto and Hinata, from Haikyuu!! What I like about this relationship is their dynamic. Hinata is enthusiastic and easily excited and Very Energetic. He's like a mini-Bokuto. And Bokuto loves that. Hinata looks up to him and even decides to become his 'disciple'. I love that Hinata continuously cheers for his senpai, and that Bokuto immediately is like "hell yeah! That's my disciple!!" It's very endearing. It's a very wholesome relationship. The reason it is lower on my list is that while I really love it, I also really really really enjoy the (non-canon) potential darker side of this platonic relationship...I have so far written and posted one fanfic where Bokuto kidnaps Shouyou in a bit of a platonic yandere way, and I really really can't let go of that idea to be honest. It's like an itch in my brain. So, if I get back to feeling like writing and posting more for Haikyuu, I may post more Bokuto tormenting Shouyou. :D

4th: Milly and Meryl from Trigun (1998). I absolutely love these two ladies. They kick ass, support each other, and bring me so much joy. Meryl and Milly work for an insurance company, chasing after Vash the Stampede because of the immense damages he caused in a past fight. They are both strong women, in different ways, and they work so well together. Meryl is the one in charge, but she's very high-strung and sometimes loses sight of things outside of work. Milly comes across as airheaded, and she is physically very strong (her gun is 98kg). She's kind and positive and makes a lot of jokes. Where Meryl gives the orders and keeps them on the right track, Milly is the one who reminds Meryl to stop and smell the flowers once in a while. They're amazing girls and they work very hard. I just really love how they encourage each other, listen to each other, and work together so well.

3rd: In third place is Rin Okumura and Izumo Kamiki, from Blue Exorcist. I actually am fond of most platonic relationships involving Izumo because she is such a tsundere and it's really fun and cute to watch her go through trying to act all prickly when she has become actually fond of her fellow exwires. I chose her and Rin, though, because I think this was one of the bigger turning points for Rin. (Spoilers for Kyoto Arc ahead! If you're caught up on the anime, then no worries!)

On the way to Kyoto, Izumo is the only one who approaches and sits next to Rin. And when he asks if she was afraid, as they now know he is the son of Satan, she responds that shouldn't matter. Sure, he's related to a demon, but Izumo points out that lots of Exorcists are. He just happens to be related to Satan. It's the way she is the first one to treat him as a normal classmate after the reveal...the way she also calls out their other classmates for being cowardly when they found out...it screams Friendship. She may pretend she's aloof most of the time, but she really does care, and this is one of my absolute favourite interactions that shows it. In return, Rin is a very caring and eager person. He definitely appreciates Izumo's actions, and it really shows in parts of the manga (of which I will not speak more since I don't want to spoil things for you!).

2nd: Swindler and Courier from Akudama Drive take the second spot! I think their relationship is really interesting. In my opinion, Courier has a bit of an older brother vibe, which immediately makes me very happy. In the show, I think the scene that cemented their relationship in my eyes was the part where they're trapped in the same scenario replaying over and over in their heads. They're trapped in the same scenario: back at the Takoyaki stand. To me, that emphasizes how much they really impacted each other. I also think by the end of the show they have a lot of trust and loyalty to each other. Swindler and Courier had to know. They Had to know that they weren't making it out alive if they tried to save Brother and Sister. There was no storyline where they would get out of that situation safe and sound. But they still did it, and they did it together. That loyalty and devotion doesn't just happen between everyone. I truly believe they had a special connection and friendship by the end, even if they didn't get to enjoy it for long.

1st: My top favourite is: Natsume and Nyanko-sensei from Natsume Yuujinchou (Natsume's Book of Friends). I just really adore the friendship between these two. Nyanko-sensei, aka Madara, comes across at first as a prickly tsundere with a very proud attitude. He's also a yokai. Natsume is a lonely orphan human who is able to see Yokai. At the start, their relationship is built on a mutually beneficial agreement: Natsume has a Book of Friends from his deceased grandmother which holds the names of yokai she defeated in fights. With their names, he can control them. Madara wants to get his paws on that book. The book makes Natsume a target for yokai who want their names back, or who want to control other yokai, as well as humans who would use the book to control all the yokai in it. Basically, they start as Madara agreeing to be Natsume's body-guard and in exchange Natsume will leave the book to Madara when he passes. But, as Natsume spends more and more time around Madara, they both grow attached. This is how we get lovely lines like "Don't eat my prey" from Madara when rescuing Natsume from other yokai, or situations where Madara is wailing like a child as Natsume returns names from the book to yokai, but actually doing nothing to stop Natsume. I adore them so much, because as Madara softens up, Natsume also opens up and learns how to make and have friends and family. They grow together. It's a really beautiful relationship.

There you have it! My current Top Five Favourite platonic relationships in media! (this is subject to change, of course, as I continue to consume new media, lol). Hope you enjoyed these answers, friend! I had fun writing this for you :D

[wimbledonsoot]

[the fall] - I'M LIKE A RACOON IN A GARAGE (ep. 4)

the plot begins to thicken as you enter the masquerade held by Mr. Jacobs in disguise and try to discover exactly what you need to know to incriminate him. as you attempt to interrogate him however, you see something that makes solving this near-impossible case even more difficult.

trigger warnings for this chapter: canon typical violence, karlnap making out + hints at Karlnapity as a whole canon thingamabob, alchohol drinking, being drunk, mentions of throwing up, implication of sexual thoughts, innuendo, suggestive comments, wolf-whistling

words: 2.4k

You would like to dig yourself a hole and die in it at this point, but instead you've got to pretend to be civil and kind to someone you think is maybe friends with a serial killer.

Which is honestly just not a good situation for you.

Initially, you'd planned to infiltrate Mr. Jacobs' house and then threaten him, but luckily enough, it seemed the man was having a party.

A large one, involving masks.

Which, of course, you were all excellently equipped for, save for your lack of any and all respectable (read: clean) clothing.

Which meant you need to commit some low-level crime (read: breaking and entering, theft, and assault. Just your average everyday shit).

Sneaking in through the window is simple, and the route to the bathrooms is easy enough, because here it is relatively empty. Mr. Jacobs has a large house (and likely a larger stack of money to go with it) and thus you're pretty much invisible. Luckily enough, however, you manage to stumble upon a group of people, and because they're spoiled ass rich ones, they're entirely too easy to knock out.

And then to drag to the bathroom.

You strip them down to their socks and underwear and then observe the clothing colection.

And curse god some more.

Because somehow, you managed to bag the most eclectic, individualistic, batshit crazy dressed people at this entire party, because the amount of furs and shit makes you want to run away and dive into the sea and then just like. drown.

Oh look. Fish scales.

You inhale deeply and bonk your head against the wall, groaning out.

"I'm not fucking wearing fish scales!" You protest.

"I'll wear the scales," Philza says.

Apollon winces, "I'll do the uh... bird costume," he spreads his wings, "these'll fit I think."

Phantom willingly goes for the whole-ass gold suit and stalks into a bathroom, while Dream eyes the lime green suit in distrust before picking it up and discovering the matching shoes, which are (hopefully) fake snakeskin cowboy boots. You can't help but laugh at him, and he sourly points at what they've left you with.

God must hate you.

Because sitting on the ground are two outfits, matching. One has a deadass cape hanging off of it, and the other's a suit with a neckline so daringly wide open that you really can't say you're fully dressed when wearing it.

And oh, lo and behold, they're both red as blood. Kind of fitting, at least in relation to your company.

"I'll do the cape," you say, hurriedly picking it up, "Sorry."

"I'll uh... figure out something with the buttons," The Blood God replies.

You shrug, a smirk on your lips, "Don't. It'll suit you I think." It slips out, you swear it does, but you'd be lying if you said that him blushing underneath his mask doesn't make your smirk grow wider. Seriously? What's wrong with you?

You silently go into the bathroom, but not before you hear Phantom snickering, "Smooth bestie."

Did he just say bestie?

---

Techno is seriously considering his life decisions as well, because the shirt is virtually buttonless and open to such an extent that it's ridiculous.

The buttons are open to as far as his navel (what was up with the guy who was originally wearing this - it's ridiculous?) but even when he does them all up, it still exposes most of his upper pectorals. It mostly lies in the cut, and it's still smaller even when he's shifted back into his human form.

Because there was no way in hell those pants would have been long enough for him.

Now, they fit well enough, albeit a bit loosely, and he'll admit that the outfit does look rather good on him. It's still a tad too revealing, but with the remaining buttons closed, he can live with it.

He still wishes he didn't have to do this in the first place.

Techno isn't super great in social settings. If he's being honest, he never has been, and that's why he's largely avoided undercover missions like this his entire time as a vigilante.

But now, he's got to go into the lion's den.

Fuck.

Plus, the fact that not only you're present, but he just goddamn called you darling and there's that whole cup of tea to deal with? It scares the living daylights out of him, if he's being honest, and it's not without reason that he's pretty determined to avoid you this evening.

He just hopes he can.

Because Phil knows that Techno uh... likes you, and Techno knows that Phil has this strange obsession with matchmaking that did, admittedly, end up with Wilbur dating his high school girlfriend Sally for three years now. So yeah, maybe it works, but Techno has shit to deal with, and he swears that if Phil tries to matchmake he will commit arson.

He can't exactly guess what happens next.

---

When you finally manage to make your way into the cape-adorned outfit and fix up your appearance appropriately, everyone else is already finished.

"That took you a while," says Phantom.

"Fuck you. Now, what's the plan?"

"Straight to the point, as per usual," Dream mutters, before continuing: "We need to infiltrate the the masquerade and find Mr. Jacobs. That means that splitting into groups is really our only option. Me and Phantom will take the top floor, and the rooms up there, Philza and Apollon, you'll take middle floor, and that leaves The Blood God and you, Y/N, to take the bottom floor and with it the ballroom."

Fuck you Dream, is the first thing you think, because why the hell has he decided to play matchmaker? He knows that for the ballroom you'll have to dance, because well, it's a ball, and he was 100% listening in on the conversation.

Prick.

But is there anything you can do? Nope.

Or, at least you think so. The Blood God has other things to say.

"Nope. I'm going with Phantom. You can go with Y/N," he demands, his voice sharp. You glance at him, planning to let him have a piece of your mind, but you stop in your tracks as soon as you see him.

Okay then. You were right about the suit looking good on him.

He's changed to his 'human form', and for a moment you think that the way his jaw curves, sharp and rather attractive, is familiar. But then the thought flits away as you spot the clothes.

Those pants look really good. And that shirt. And the colour matches his pink hair, tied into a ponytail, really well.

Damn.

"Yes?" The very Blood God interrupts your thoughts, and you clamp your mouth shut, blushing, as you quickly look away.

"Nothing."

You spot Dream rolling his eyes and prepare to flash him the finger, but before you can do so, The Blood God sighs and says: "Fine, I'll go with Y/N."

"You don't have to act so unhappy about it," you mutter, crossing your arms. He raises an eyebrow.

"Well with the charming company..."

"Fuck you."

The Blood God smirks, actually smirks as he turns away, stepping towards the door, "I do believe it's time we leave."

Dream grins and Apollon, never one to be outdone, actually wolf-whistles as you reluctantly grip your future dance-partner's hand.

You're about *this* close to saying fuck it and beating them both up, but naturally your inner instincts tell you not to, so you don't (plus, it's not as though you're entirely... reluctant to be dancing with The Blood God).

"Let's do this then, Blood God."

He laughs - actually laughs, "I'm already shaking with anticipation."

How is he so charming?!

---

"You're really sure about this? We're in public... it'd be so easy for us to get-"

Karl clamps a hand over Sapnap's mouth as he speaks, smirking slightly as he glances down, and trails the hand down as soon as he's sure his fiancee will stop.

His fiancee. God.

"Caught? Sapnap, darling, we're engaged now. It's not... it's not bad if we're caught, you know that right?" He doesn't wait for answer, instead hovering his lips over Sapnap's and smiling.

He nods.

---

In between loving kisses, Karl speaks, and it's near impossible for Sapnap's heart not to ache. Karl doesn't remember Quackity. Quackity forced him to forget. Quackity left us.

It's the first time they've been together since it happened. The first time. And Sapnap's heart aches. It aches so badly that he's sure that it'll break. And of course he should be happy; he has to be, he's with his loving fiancee (the one who has no clue about his other true love) and he should be happy.

Instead he's remembering the past and he's crying salty tears into the mess of kisses and scrambling hands.

Fuck.

It was a month ago, when Quackity did fuck-knows-what and suddenly Karl didn't remember him, and then suddenly their perfect relationship was fucked, down the drain.

No more soft touches.

No more cramped film nights on the couch.

No more peaceful, near domestic life.

Karl's finger brushes against the side of his eye, wiping away the tears. Are you okay?

No. He's not. He can't say that though.

"Got something in my eye, Karl," Sapnap pushes him away, "It's nothing bad. Don't... don't worry."

Karl stares at him in worry, but when his gaze flickers up his eyes harden. "Well, Sap. Guess you were right about getting caught."

---

Five minutes earlier, you're honestly having the time of your life.

Whoever this Mr Jacobs guy is, he throws good parties, and you're sure that you've never been served this many flutes of champagne consecutively. The Blood God's already admonished you a few times too many for you to count, but at this point you're just past tipsy and your inhibitions are flowing away like dust on the wind.

Pretty.

Someone's blowing bubbles and you frown as they fly past you, one of them bumping against your nose. You giggle, smiling as the man responsible walks up and smirks. He's dressed strangely; reminiscent of a video game character, but he's not unattractive. And he's got funny powers.

"Hi!" You say, smiling.

He grins, leaning against a counter and acting quite suave, if you're being honest.

"Hi, I'm Connor, and you?"

You blink once or twice, "The Connor? Like ConnorEatsPants? The world famous superhero? The fuck are you doing in L'Manberg?"

"Mr Jacobs is a friend of mine. Why are you here though, especially without a partner? Unless you have one, and they're just off getting you drinks - I'll back off if that's the case."

"I-" wait, speaking of your partner... where is he? And... why is your target dragging someone off to a room somewhere?! "I've got to go. Pleasure meeting you, Connor."

You hurry off, trying to find The Blood God and struggling to keep an eye on your target.

You do end up finding him. Even though it's via you practically crashing into him while he's effectively flirting. Wonderful.

"Fuck!" You shriek as you crash into him, and the woman he's talking to is the one who catches you as he falls (which is embarrassing, because he's pretty, and she's pretty, and you're clumsy as fuck when you're drunk tipsy).

"Thanks," you tap her arm and then focus on the Blood God, "Target's right there, partner. Like literally walking away.

He glances at you, his gaze cold, and you raise an eyebrow, "I thought you were better at this than I was?" He doesn't react, so you sigh loudly, gently remove yourself from the pretty woman's grip and say: "Well, if you're too busy flirting with a woman just as incredibly attractive as yourself - that is in no way shape or form irony - then it seems I must find the culprit myself."

With that you stumble away, seemingly leaving him alone.

You're jealous.

Oof.

Not only are you jealous, you're drunk, which means that focusing exclusively on following your target plus his increasingly willing accompaniment is rather difficult while also focusing on being able to walk properly. It's a curse, being a lightweight. Makes you oh-so-fun at parties.

Eventually, you do develop a sort of rhythm, and as you pick some of the canapés and snacks up along your way, you start to sober up. Which is useful.

Because in your hunt it seems you've entered the bedrooms.

Oof, guess you're getting free porn?

Before you can continue along the hallway in search of your targets, someone grabs your shoulder and tugs you back, spinning you around while gripping your other shoulder so that you're facing you assaulter.

The assaulter going by the name of none other than The Blood God.

---

"Let go of me," you say, but your voice is low and your posture is tense.

Techno grips your shoulders tighter.

Your face is flushed and read, you're barely standing, and the exposed skin of your shoulder he's gripping is clammy and cold. In short: you're drunk.

How. Did. You. Manage. To. Get. Drunk?!

He frowns, thinking of what he can do. You're right about the targets being right around the corner; he saw them entering the bedroom just about a minute ago (he can guess pretty well what they're doing but hey, it's always fun to crash parties). That doesn't mean he can just drag you along though. He doesn't know what mental state you're in, but it doesn't paint a pretty picture if the main member of this interrogative crew is nearly blackout drunk (not that you're at that point yet, but he's reasonably sure you're going to start throwing up soon).

When he tries to ask the voices for help, all they can comment on is how good your bare skin feels under his fingertips (and a whole other train of depraved thoughts that he chooses to ignore out of plain self respect).

Eventually, he decides that he's going to have to take you with him, simply because you'll demand him. After getting you some water, you knock on the door of the room in which your target is an open it.

And find none other than one of your best friends staring right back at you.