#they look like actual children here
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Can't believe Bruce canonically picked up a random 12yo homeless child who had no intent to become a vigilante and suddenly thrust Robin onto him without asking if that's what he wanted because he missed Dick (whom he fired because being Robin was too dangerous) and people still act like any take that's not "all the Batkids became vigilantes on their own completely independent of Bruce (who tried so hard to stop them but sadly just couldn't do it)" is a complete idiotic bad-faith take and that you're crazy if you disagree with people saying that Bruce has never ever absolutely NEVER picked up a kid for the purpose of making them into a vigilante.
#my dc posting#jason todd#dc#batman#bruce wayne#any child would be delighted to be told they could become a superhero#children also aren't known for their ability to make rational and good decisions.#jason did not yearn for the cape and would not have become a vigilante without bruce's interference#you want a character who became a vigilante independently and couldn't (and shouldn't) be stopped by bruce? duke#duke thomas did that#his mentor/mentee relationship with bruce is an actually good example of what a healthy one should look like#teaching someone already in the business but new to it how to do it well and as safe as possible. that's the good shit#''batman needs robin'' mmhm. tell me more about how the relationship of mentorship between an adult and their child needs to be focused#and centered around the needs of the adult. this is such a power fantasy for children; grown men relying on them for their mental wellbeing#(duke&jason are the only ones whose origins i have personally read hence why they are focused on here)#bruce wayne critical#<- for filtering purposes#comics bruce you are a bitch and an asshole#bitter-hibiscus your post abt the nature of the batman&robin relationship even outside the bounds of 'child soldier' still being bad#will always be famous to me
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That middle child feel when you’re the one who successfully gets you and your siblings out of trouble only to immediately get jumped by them afterwards
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#pouring one out for all my fellow middle children 😔#Donnie betraying his fellow middle child like this…even being the one to throw him under the bus first smh#no but like if I was Leo here I’d be like wtf guys#it does make me wonder if Leo constantly was the one who got them all out of messes#and in turn the main one who took the fall if his attempts failed rip#we kinda see this often in the series tbh? where Leo takes point when it comes to talking out a situation#maybe it started very very young as seen in this short#(actually there is no ‘if’ Leo was the one doing this he literally WAS at least twice as tots from what we’re shown)#side eyes Bug Busters where Leo gets his bros out of being turned into clowns and immediately gets blasted 😭#no thanks in sight#can’t even blame him for being a sore winner there I would be too lol#and then he gets thrown off a building like man all around an f tier day for Hamato Leonardo#side note but Leo’s face stripes look especially pink in this lighting and I really like when we can see that pinkness because it looks cute
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Complex feelings about copyright and Disney's appalling ethics aside, it does unsettle me how quickly people jump to make and monetize the most unnerving, depraved content imaginable about characters created for children the second it hits the public domain
#lilac rambles#lilac goes to the movies#look you don't have to defend yourselves to me i don't really care what you do#so please don't flood my inbox with all this stuff about why disney sucks and why gross stuff is good actually#im not here to fight#i get it. they suck and this feels vindicating#i just get unnerved watching people do terrible things to things created for children the second they can#maybe it's bc i don't see anyone making anything...idk...nice? and like...not freaky?#like it really feels like 'haha we're going to defile this creation bc it makes us feel good to destroy something created for families'#bc if it had just been the case with mickey id get it yknow#but people did this with sweet old pooh bear too#but maybe that's bc he's now a disney property idk#like maybe as other famous characters come into the public domain people won't do the same things#and honestly that will make me feel a lot better
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My great-uncle runs grocery stores and he told me about having to close down the one by the university because the students never bought fresh perishable foods there and (though I haven't been a college student these 6 years) I still am very proud of myself whenever my grocery list is just perishables
#today i got kale arugula smoked salmon apple lemon green beans and coconut milk#to be supplemented by chicken pot pie (homemade w homemade broth and chicken fat to make the roux) and butternut squash soup#and chia seed pudding and eggs to feed me for the week#am i like. a healthy eater?? i know i am but the amount of greens i actually want to eat rn is shocking#also hello i'm barely clinging to life and health in the aftermath of 2 trips in 2 weeks but i AM clinging#i am fed i worked out outside i am showing up at work and getting it done#i still have an entire conference paper to write in the next 8 days#and i need to get my car repaired#AND apply for a job (many things have changed in me so fast job-wise#but i can't really post about it til i journal about it but that won't happen for days)#my soul is so full though i got so much physical touch and saw beloved friends and their children#4 parently professors 10 dear friends and 3 children IT WAS THE BEST#and then today i had dinner with my friends here and goofed with the twins so :) all's well :)#i just am on a tight deadline to get my body and life stabilized before next weekend i take another road trip and pms#love you all i hold you dearly i intend to send forth mail. once i'm sane at home again. which may not happen til december#oh! and my copy of deep secret by diana wynne jones came in the mail while i was gone#and! i got to the colorwork part of my sweater and it looks AWESOME
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At this point I don't think Teruki's parents are exceptionally horrible individuals (long-term psychological consequences still happen in cases in which the abuse isn't considered particularly severe + everyone is capable of harm, even "good" people), but they weren't the best, without a doubt.
Okay, they got too busy with their jobs and had to move overseas to progress on their career. External circunstances. Things that happen. They left their son behind, but that could always be justified by hectic schedules of ever-moving businesspeople. How else could he have a stable routine to focus on his future? They're just busy. Teruki hasn't seen them in long but that's not their fault, right?
They cared for Teruki, didn't they? His parents made sure that there was someone home to watch him whenever they were far away. It was inevitable that there would be times he would be with himself, though. But that's not bad! It only became a problem once those strange espers tried to take hold of him on the street. And even then, they were so weak he could barely give them the title of a psychic. It wasn't an issue that it happened more and more and there was no one to intervene. Or that Teruki had to torture descriptions of "Claw organization" and "brainwashed soldiers" out of these grownups to know what they wanted with him. His parents couldn't know. Why should they know? Better put: what could they do?
What could a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
It was Teruki's choice to live by himself. He could manage it all. Contrary to the other kids, he was an independent and responsible young man who could be trusted with a house and money. Such a great boy. His parents were so proud to have someone as competent as him as a son, one which wouldn't mean hard work for them. One who always had the best grades and was the soccer team's best player and was the best student on the town's best middle school.
Of course they would suddenly allow Teruki to live on his own. Any parent with a child like him would, wouldn't they? Anyone on their right mind and who knew the slightlest about him would be sure he could do it.
And even if this "Claw" organization scared him a bit and he felt a bit lonely at times, it wasn't an issue. Issue would mean it was an obstacle - which it wasn't, as Teruki did perfectly on his own. His parents believed on so. That's why he had his own apartment at 12 on the first place. Teruki was so wonderful at this. It wasn't horrible if they didn't answer his calls, because they were so busy and he wasn't a little kid who depends on his mommy. None of this was their fault. He shouldn't bother them or himself over this.
Because they cared, right? On the end, it was only a pile of tragic circunstances and coincidences no normal person could act against. It was part of life as someone special like him. He couldn't expect that his parents could change any of this, and this made his loneliness the best possible choice. It was obvious that they would support such a decision.
What would a normal person do against someone with psychic powers?
#this was supposed to be a short description of how I imagine the Hanazawas but I got carried away with the prose#I suppose I'll leave some of the original idea here on the tags#for some reason Teruki's parents seem to be the type of absent parents who do care about their children#yet they don't have the slightlest ability to provide a happy and healthy life besides the generic ideal of a perfect kid#a kid who has a nice home and money to have fun and is physically healthy and has good grades#and their son is so special. of course they would brag about him at any opportunity to do so because it shows how they're good parents#yet they don't put any extra effort on caring for their kid besides this “minimum”. why would they? isn't he happy enough?#they gave such a damn perfect life for him! look how great he is doing by himself! look how he is an amazing kid!#and they say it like an irritatingly oblivious owner talks about their pet dog who has clear behavior and health issues#and their lack of emotional effort and actual care for teruki's wellbeing is so morbidly comical it warps into not being even funny#its just painful and absurd and they don't have an idea on how their choices are absolutely crazy bad#because there is no way you could be implying they're bad parents. they love teruki so much#mp100#mob psycho 100#teruki hanazawa#lalá rambling...
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every time i see someone make the "trapper didn't leave a note" argument i lose 5 years off my life fr
#you people are willfully misinterpreting that scene to make your ship look better and it's so obvious#HAWKEYE IS THE ONE WHO WAS LATE#radar could not have been clearer that trapper waited until the last possible second#what the fuck was he supposed to do; not go home????#if he was waiting for hawkeye so he could say goodbye in person and hawk didn't show up i'm sorry but that is simply not on trapper#and you're doing both of their characters a huge disservice by taking it that way#and that's not even bringing up the kiss#that doesn't scream 'he never cared about hawkeye in the first place' which is how i see people talk about that scene constantly#do i think hawkeye has 0 right to be upset? no!#but trapper isn't evil for wanting to go home to his wife and children you dense motherfuckers that's what the whole show is about#tumblr users love to find a guy they already don't like and reverse engineer reasons that they're actually morally superior for it#sorry i don't usually get Confrontational on here but i'm so goddamn tired of this#mash#my posts
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I will never make this because it would be for an audience of one (me) but ever since reading "If we Were Villains" (story about serious drama kids in college who perform shakespeare and deal with a murder) I have been entertaining the thought of a crack fic crossover with High School Musical The Musical The Series where the staff decides they will no longer put on shakespeare after the tragic accident that happened at Thanksgiving, because Shakespeare plays would only increase the tension and drama. So they hire Ms. Jen who decides their spring play will actually be High School Musical (which exists in the 90s in this universe) and it ruins the vibe so much that everyone gives up on being dark and mysterious because they're universally pissed at Ms Jen for making them learn choreoraphed basketball dancing.
#if we were villains is actually genuinely good and has actual literary worth and pulls from shakespeare in an intelligent meaningful way#but unfortunately all i can do is comedy so this is the only fan content i have to offer :(#THE THING IS iwwv is just hsmtmts if it hsmtmts was good and also they committed crimes#they utilize the same parallel of casting choices with real life drama which I love#umm so casting: Meredith would be Sharpay Obvi. I think it would be really funny if James was cast as Ryan bc they hate eachother and would#have to pretend to be siblings working together. And I think ashley tisdale and Lucas Gabreel actually didn't get along when filming#also i love the thought of Ms Jen looking at James and going “i know what you are”#HOWEVER it would be more interesting if james was Chad to Oliver's Troy (which is really just reversing their Romeo and Juliet moment)#bc chad is like nooo don't do theater... stick with me and do basketball... but it would be Coded Subtextually#Unfortunately Wren would be typecast as Gabriella and I don't think that would cause drama bc I don't believe James actually liked her!#I think it was comp het bc she was very sweet and nonthreatening as opposed to Meredith's big flirting energy so she would be a “safe” crus#lets lean into that actually. this gives Wren a chance to have a personality (bc I enjoy this book but it is not good at fleshing out women#So oliver and Wren spend more time together and kind of talk about James a little and Wren is like yeah James is very sweet#and I like him but it feels so hard to get him to feel comfortable with me... i guess he's just closed off and doesn't talk much#we also get to see more of her personality and interests maybe she's like I relate to gabriella because I also like to Read :) feminism#and oliver is like Hmm That Is Not My Experience With Him perhaps our bond is deeper and James does like me Hm#And then Meredith can flirt with him as Sharpay and James gets pissed and in character gets very intense about how Troy can't join THEATER#that's why he's upset and sad bc sharpay represents theater and only that reason and nothing else and he isn't in love with oliver At All#Alexander can be Ryan now since James is Chad (and he's also Gay) and Filippa can be Kenzie bc they're both queer coded#Anyway at rehearsal one day Meredith and James and Oliver are having their fighting over troy moment and then Meredith stops and is like#wait guys. This musical is so freaking stupid. why are we even doing this#and their mutual frustration at their art being turned into a farce is enough to bond them together and they're like#we need to focus on our REAL enemy: ms Jen#and then they hatch a scheme and it's probably like. They dump a bucket of fake blood on her at opening night a la carrie#and then put on their own rebellious production... it still has to be a musical because i like musicals#families with children are in the audience and they're like OK FOLKS! HERE'S ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW!#if we were villains#iwwv#hsmtmts#high school musical the musical the series
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nobody fucking touch me rn i went to see tf one in the cinema and im shaking. they actually made a good transformers movie. what the fuck
#time to go home and read the entirety of jro's mtmte and lost light again ig#what the FUCK i was not expecting it to be actually fucking stunning. that's MY loser dumpster fire of a children's toy franchise how did t#ey actually make it . good#really good#five out of five stars. when elita said “you dont have the touch or the power” i fucking choked#obviously it is only going to mire the canon more because of the changes to megatron's backstory (no gladiators 😔) & lack of allspark plot#but i dont even fucking care. dont even touch me rn i cant ever get over this#broken friendships & corruption arcs are THE SHIT and they did this one better than i was expecting#when pax fell like a falling star... primus itself opened to him...#ratchet cameo! arcee cameo! jazz cameo! not to mention ALPHA TRION#i can see the war in this . i can see this . millions of years in the future they will still b fighting. orion mightve been a “pacifist” by#megatron's standards but he knows how to fight. he fights more than he should. and bee.... bee... THATS MY FUCKING NAMESAKE GUYS DONT EVEN#TOUCH ME RN. IM SHAKING. HOLY SHIT#bumblebee you are SUCH a dork. what the FUCK.#and the quintessons!!!!! i am LIVING for the art direction and the organic/inorganic imagery#those quintesson energon-hoover things reminded me of energon eaters too. & in that first shot of them entering the cave w the primes i#originally thought scraplets before i came back to myself. there's something to be said here tho.#they did a good job with the worldbuilding. suitably alien-like. exceeded expectations. that ginormous quintesson ship? i'm going insane#you can SEE the birth of the myth in this stupid fucking movie you can SEE how op becomes who he becomes. the way he grew. the way they bot#grew until they were the only person that could hold the other back . the way he is going to be irreversibly changed. d16's eyes...#that scene w starscream has a chokehold on me. i cant breathe. the way they all looked at megatron when his blaster emerged#the fight scenes#ELITA ONE !!!#AIRACHNID !!!!#honest to god though i must confess that the first coherent thought i had about this movie was “oh they made him so cunty” . abt pax. i#am so sorry#but okay okay okay i . they were amica endura at the beginning. at the least. i'm. AKHRERJGH#tf one#me when megatron ascended out of iacon & he was the only land vehicle amid a swarm of planes. me when the SYMBOLISM#🐝
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I love when he entertains her bullshit lmao
#fast forward 5 years from now#their conversations sound concerning to an outsider ngl#doing flashbacks/time skips is so hard here because valen has looked the same her entire life#gideon you can see his hair is a bit longer and there’s a certain dilfy air to him ksjdkdj#not her tho#she stays looking the same since she was 16#anyways don’t mind me yall distracting myself from their canon#this is where I live now#in this universe where they’re happily married with 6 children#I got very emo drawing this negl#their wedding rings 🥹#valen being pregnant as fuck 😭💀💀#<< happy for her tho she’s living her dreams#her house isn’t sad and empty anymore#she’s just like maddy when she said she’d look so sexy pregnant#I actually have some thoughts on this lol#ok anyways bye im running away don’t perceive me#ocs#artists on tumblr#my ocs#my art#valen x gideon
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these are super, super informal and unorganized thoughts but god these panels are haunting me so:
it’s interesting to finally be reading some of the issues that i assume influence general fanon perception of damian because there’s so much emphasis on the actions against tim (and like yeah fair, fucked up let’s not move past that) but also there’s little moments sprinkled throughout that made me go “…this is a child. This is a whole child.”
like idk man! These two pieces of dialogue are very striking to me! “See? I can be useful!” And “Look at me, Mother!”. Maybe it’s just because I work with kids but i read this and very clearly hear a child’s voice! And sometimes i think because a lot of people get caught up in the “formal” way that damian speaks that people forget he’s a kid. A very competent, highly trained kid. But he’s a kid.
Again, i don’t think Damian’s actions can be brushed off just because he’s a kid, and (within the content of the Morrison run), has had some fucked up shit going on. But like - for fanon, I’m just begging folks to strike the balance between talking about Damian being held accountable for his actions and also understanding that in this point in time he’s like maybe nine or ten-years-old. Idk! I’m tired of reading analysis and fan fiction that absolutely crucifies Damian and doesn’t try to find the nuance at all.
#Ramblings#damian wayne#batman comics#batman#batman and son#i don’t wanna give any flowers to Morrison because these are also the issues with the most insane depictions of talia i’ve ever seen#But like. These moments are in here for a reason okay#I don’t have enough brain cells at the moment to talk about how there like. Might be some adultification bias somewhere in here#From the fandom side#Peace and love i am also a Tim Drake stan but why is he allowed to be a hurt child and not Damian#Examine that perhaps#And I’m so dead serious when you read or re-read damian Wayne’s dialogue#When you read him in fics#Do you actually hear a child’s voice. Im so dead serious#I’m just feeling particularly reflective on how we teach and treat children because I’m in the middle of an intense work week w my own kids#And so. These panels are haunting me#Also like if u made this far into the tags please feel free to correct me on Damian’s age in this particular run#Cause I’ve been hopping around from run to run and so i get confused#Anyways please look at all these characters as humans#Im scared of fandom so I’m dropping this and running away bye#The formatting on this post is so inconsistent sorry if it’s not readable
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"I need to learn how to draw dudes" turned into "I need to draw things for this AU that lives in my head because I have a Tumblr I can post them to now."... But yeah..silly little basically a comfort AU that lives rent-free in my head, and is taking up plenty of space there, in which "Protecting the Travelers of The Night." translates into a completely other thing entirely (One of our moon boys starts what's similar to a group home but..not.) and...now these exist. It's silly and is based off a dream I had while I was..not doing great (hence 'comfort AU') but..eh, it makes me happy. (I won't lie, I'm hesitant to even post this.)
Steven typically fronts when the younger kids want to play, whereas Marc typically fronts when it comes to handling older kids/teenagers - especially those who are a bit more..closed off - and Jake..is here I haven't really figured much out for him yet.
Closing thought, the hardest thing of these to draw was 'someone doing something other than standing' and Jake's flat cap for..some reason.
#fanart#moon knight#marc spector#steven grant#jake lockley#multiple unnamed children#marvel#digital art#unnamed au#feel free to reblog#Can you actually tell who these people are?#Jake is obvious sure but the other two just look like random dudes#actually I think Steven looks a bit like Johnny Gage here#No one knows who that is probably#but seriously if anyone out there who sees this is interested in seeing more for this AU please do tell#or if you have ideas for what to call it#seriously it needs a name
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JoJo Siwa doesn’t deserve all the hate (and homophobia) she’s getting for her style and music; but she does deserve scrutiny for defending Colleen Ballinger and being both active and complicit in abuse that happened on her TV show. Like the girl has been under the public eye in unhealthy environments all her life; cut her some slack — not too much; she’s still a responsible adult — but if you’re going to dogpile her, then at least dogpile her for the right reasons. Jesus Fucking Christ.
#jojo siwa#discourse#Her comment sections are VILE#I actually don’t hate her songs. They’re basically early-2000s new old stock and I like early 2000s music#Is she trying too hard to look like an “adult?” Yes. But that’s understandable.#What isn’t understandable is screaming at children for no fucking reason#and JoJo not helping at all when a girl was hemorrhaging out her belly button#when JoJo’s mother told the girl to “put a pad on it”#I don’t care how afraid you are of your parents; you END that shit the second you see it#I was raised in a cult and I actively sabotaged my parents’ preaching work on multiple occasions#I didn’t know if I’d get kicked out if they found out I did that; the only reason I still have a relationship with them#is because they never found out about my later sabotage#Dad preached to a waitress dangling a cure for her sons’ disorder in front of her nose as incentive to join and gave her literature#So I went to the restaurant with him and insisted I pay for the tip.#I gave her eight dollars and a sticky note with a bunch of keywords about the cult’s abuses to look up#The next time I went there#she said didn’t understand the sticky note and asked me while he was gone what I meant#I hate talking to people especially when I’m under pressure because I trip over my words even when I’m NOT anxious#But her kids’ lives being free of a cult meant more to me than avoiding a momentary discomfort so I gave a quick rundown#She thanked me and heeded my warning basically playing along with me and not saying anything to my dad about it#I was 20; JoJo was about 19 when her show was going on#She had no excuse for allowing her mom to do that.#At the very least she could have said “Oh god I’m so sorry she said that. Please don’t hurt yourself for my show; go to the hospital.”#But no. She didn’t do that. In fact she screamed at children and joked that if they were crying then it was a good show.#Bitch come here and do that in front of me. I double dog dare you. I may only be 5’5” but I fight dirty and I’m angrier than you#Sorry. I guess I do hate her… for THAT specifically.#Like yeah I’ve fucked up with the kids I help and yelled when I didn’t have to but I HATED doing it and tried to do better later#Why someone would SCREAM at kids on purpose for long periods of time for no reason is beyond me
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I have finally emptied the blue bench of all the library books I need to hand back, even though they were terribly photogenic in there, and instead have filled it with all the old children's books I've been keeping around for like fifteen years or more, even though the chances of me ever having children or even passing them on to nieces/nephews/cousins etc is vanishingly small. These are less photogenic but at least it's one way to start clearing the living room of boxes.
Currently strategising how to fit them all in but also wow this is a list of Problematic Children's Authors TM
#I mean#They're all dead and they were probably considered Problematic long before I read them as a kid and I turned out sort of ok-ish#But honestly not a great look and very much proponents of a particular early to mid twentieth century upper class moral system#On the other hand#I do fully believe that the PTSD-addled disaster teenager in a Sopwith Camel that is James Bigglesworth is appropriate reading for kids#The shelf goes 'Snotty boarding school stories; saccharine animal stories; now let's introduce the children to the concept of WW1#Shellshock and alcoholism time for the little ones; on the other hand the racist elements in quite a few of them are going to need reviewin#Not sure the 1970s approach- which was essentially to revere the same authors but delete the racist and sexist language- actually worked#Because it took out the worst words but it didn't actually do anything about the fundamental attitudes of the books#Maybe we should have asked WHY we revere a certain type of children's literature from a certain (colonial; stiff upper-lip; heroic) era#Rather than simply deleting a word here and there and repackaging them as essentially ok for the next generation#Eh#As I say I turned out fine and I think if handled properly it can teach children how to read critically#But if in some miraculous turn of events there ever Real Children in this house that shelf is going to need diversifying#I just can't seem to bring myself to throw them out yet; I know I'm not likely to ever have children so not sure why I keep them really#But I used to think I'd have them for my own kids and that's a hard idea to let go of#And not something I'm willing to unpack right now#On the other hand 'The Adventures of Robin Hood' has to stay even though the spine is falling off#It has been a favourite of two generations because we all love Robin Hood and also Marion is allowed to be kick-ass for thirty seconds#And that tiny scene got me through half my childhood#Earth and stone
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You could stay forever, if you wanted (Patreon)
#Doodles#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#Helix#Coraline#I blame plushy brain lol#I initially wanted this to be a Max-centric Coraline AU but I realized pretty quickly that Max would just straight up get button eyes#Like it would be barely a question he would fall for it hook line and sinker#''The Beldam doesn't go after adults because children's problems and trust in parental figures'' wrong - Max Vyer#He already falls into his own world of dreams and make believe you Cannot look me in the eyes and tell me this man wouldn't get his soul#eaten in exchange for getting to actually experience his fantasies he's so dumb ;;<3#So I had to switch it to Dex because he'd actually be a challenge and the Beldam loves games lol#Okay but also imagine - Max getting duped and Dex coming to rescue him hwehh#Coraline AUs are endlessly fascinating to me because they always cut right to the core of ''This is what you want - right?''#It's that Want Vs. Need babey!!! Gah it's so good <3#Here's another question - you think the Beldam would assume the form of Madame Vyer? 'Cause yes the Matriarch role but#It's hard to argue that Dex and Max aren't the most important figures in each other's lives and her wit would kinda need to be in full focus#But it's Definitely incorrect to limit their relationship to being just guardian/paternal/filial/platonic to really any degree#Would get real awkward real fast - another reason I had to switch to Dex 'cause again he'd Resist just agh how creepy! It'd be really creepy#All that to one side for now tho lol - I really love the twist of the knife option personally ♪#Of ''I see what you want and I can give it to you exactly how it would be in your real old life - don't you want that?''#It's so invasive! So intrusive! The little doll scouting out the disappointments that could be so easily ''corrected'' hwagh#Dex finally getting actually called out for his coddling Max from Max ''himself'' and promised that he could keep doing it#That's where it hurts - to be told that you don't have to change but that this is the way reality would conform around your decisions#Ow <3 I love that#Is it everything you hoped it would be? Are you ready to give in yet? Hhhh ♥
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im also increasingly sure that im autistic but we'll never ever confirm that </3
#i had this in person entry exam to a new university to a course that involves working with people young and old#and Apparently waiting for your turn to speak means you never get a turn to speak which means you're not the right fit to be working with#children. i was polite sorry i didnt get in your face about it. come on. :-/#but ok i shall remain the world's most distraught humanities student for a year more. and im going to complain the whole time#i Was excited about this but i did misjudge what this course would be like. bummer. at least the teachers at btk are sweet and lovely#but god let me out. i dont want to do this. i dont want to do any of this. someone give me a thesis question that can't be dealt with in#two sentences#every time i think of something it's like oh yeah the answer is right here. this is the answer and im not going to make a fool of anyone in#writing 15 pages about it#which is admittedly not a lot but i am a man of succinctness and i want an actual worthy topic#and currently im only thinking about jeeves and wooster. i guess there could be something about societal commentary and everything but thats#not very interesting is it#so hi if anyone has an idea they want a meddling english student to research and write about in some detail chime in in the replies#my post#look how succinct these tags are. proving my point#as to why ill never get diagnosed: i could get into that as well but ive almost run out of tags
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mmm essay about sally and kid gort in the tags (cw for child abuse, mentions of suicide, animal cruelty and a murder attempt. i always hope i don’t have to say this but just in case: i don’t excuse or condone any of her or gort’s behaviour at all.) this is literally not even touching upon everything i have to say because i hit the fucking tag limit lmao. NOBODY READ IT’S BAD BRAINSTORMING I JUST NEEDED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW
#thinkin too much about gortie side characters again.#sally this time and why she specifically talks about him the way she does#like dravo is obviously still shitty but to me he was. ‘just ‘neglectful#while sally actively hated and even felt terrorised by her own child#like. it’s not like i don’t understand her at all.#imagine you and your love don’t have much besides each other and your shop and you get pregnant and ready to raise a child#only for it to not be a child he didn’t and doesn’t cry ever and he learns everything so much sooner than most but then he never calls you#his parents and it’s not just a petty thing kids do sometimes you feel that he doesn’t see you as family and the worst part is that you#agree deep down#and as he gets older he doesn’t have any friends and actively rejects the notion of the entire concept#but then as time passes you hear about how he has entire groups of children following him and then several of them commit suicide#and that thing coming to sit with you and dravo at the dinner table says that he did what you did last week when the axe to chop wood broke#and you discarded it and got a new one#and he has these habits of ripping out flowers and making sure that they don’t regrow#and then you hear rumours about a friend’s daughter’s cat disappearing and think nothing of it#until you visit his tree house a month later and find a declawed cat and birds with clipped wings and crushed bugs that he keeps fondly#and then you see him with other children and they don’t know and his face is different and body language is entirely different#and were it not for the fact that you know better you would never see anything but a normal child#and you know that you are one who painstakingly brought this thing that should not be into the world and so you decide to end it all one da#and go to him as he’s asleep with the knife shaking in your hand#but he cries when you’re above him! screams at the top of his lungs!#so you beg for forgiveness even though you don’t deserve it through tears but as soon as the knife is put away you see the act drop and fee#his clever fingers having twisted your brain inside and out and you know that you can do nothing#and so the opportunity arises to at least remove him out of your life if not everyone’s lives and you take it immediately.#but you heard him talk. how he will close his fist around the world one day. and you know that it is not a matter of if but when.#like. imagine that. jesus dude.#like i hc her as someone that is messy and does not know a lot about life and she certainly wouldn’t have been a good mother but the love#or at least desire to love is there somewhere. and believing that having a child is really the only somewhat meaningful thing she can do#with her life. she’s not some hero or rich or anything of note. so there’s a lot obligation and not genuine desire for family here.#but she never really got the chance to be an actual mother in the first place so. who knows what that might have looked like
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