#they can do it under their own power
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If it's true that one of the mods left kudos on your nsfw fic that is so fucking funny 😭
sorry this whole situation happened to you and I support you!
Ask received on Jul 02, 2024 – 8:39 AM. Context: 1, 2.
I wish it wasn't true... 'Cause that's definitely one of the things that made it worse for me. What kind of moral integrity do you have if you think it's okay to enjoy something a person made and condemn it in the same breath? Wild to me.
The whole story is slightly longer tbh. I was re-reading one of my server members' Explicit Sonadow story, and I don't remember why I looked at Kudos, maybe it was an accidental glance even, but I saw a familiar nickname. "No," I thought. "It can't be them, can it?" So, I go to their profile, and there's a fic (non-Sonic) which title I copy and search up on that mod's blog. Boom. It's them. My initial reaction was "What a hypocrite 🙄", but ultimately I decided to ignore this.
That is, until I was editing End Notes on one of my Mature fics and absent-mindedly looked through the Kudos... And who do I see? Them. I'll admit, this time my first reaction was to go straight to the Headmod Chaz and be like "is this your mod" asdfghjk One of my besties though told me that would be dishonourable and do I really want to stoop to their level, etc. Instead, I went on that mod's blog, asked anonymously if they're okay with non-followers PMing them, PMed them if they participated in the vetting process and the desicions concerning members' bans... and they told me they did all of it together as a team. I confirmed with them if they'll be okay with me asking more questions and then the conversation I describe in [context link 1] happened. They backpedaled quick about their actual extent of participating in vetting process during it 😅 They also tried to imply both of my artists were uncomfortable with me which I knew from [artist 1] isn't true. (At least they apologised and claimed that one was a mistake on their part).
Anyway, new fun fact: Since I made a post about my experience, this mod also blocked me. And another mod unblocked me and blocked me again in the span of 24 hours, so I will go update the og post with new numbers XD
#Thank you for your support 🥹#Anonymous#asks#Sonic Big Bang 2024#Sonic Big Bang#sthbigbang#fandom event#Still not gonna name the mod#If the other mods want to figure out who their wolf in sheep's clothing is#they can do it under their own power#Unless they already know and all of them are just a bunch of huge hypocrites 🤔#I wanted to ask this mod if the others know because at this point I started to feel pity for them#like 'hey blink twice if the others are keeping you hostage'#But that's when they decided to start ignoring me lol
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A lil guy !
#honkai star rail#dan heng#genuinely have a million things i wanna draw and then zero energy#so dan heng in a hoodie#now i gotta go get dinner sooooo maybe that will give energy and then i can draw more of what i actually wanna draw#but i kinda spent like ... hours ? talking to my mom earlier today#since shes been in the hospital for many many days#so i was catching her up on whats been goin on and showed her silly lil videos#and telling her how hyped i was for summer hrid and she (very patient with my fe talk)#was like you always tell me about banners being bad so it must have made you REALLY happy to say the whole banner is good#and im like yeah and i had multiple people on multiple sites like hey salmon/moeblob did ya see the banner#and she was like thats so cool that people acknowledge who you like and im like yeah it is p cool#and then i told her how mad i was at the absolutely criminal act of limiting how you can watch clue (1985 hit movie)#like i told her yeah sure i own it twice on dvd and once on itunes and that the only way to watch those#are either desktop or ps2 and how i dont have access to my itunes email#and i dont have it on my laptop so i sadly would have to rebuy the movie on itunes under a new acct#then i said how i loved that it was free to watch with ads on yt and id watched it twice that way#but then recently wanted to watch it on there but laptop and hoo boy you have to buy or rent it now#so i v angrily was like fine whatever ill do the thing and leave my room and go watch it on my moms tv#while she isnt around and use her amazon prime where it should be included except ! IT WASNT!#YOU HAVE TO HAVE PRIME TO BUY OR RENT IT NOW TOO!#HOW ARE THEY DOING THIS AND WHY ! who in the world is watching this movie so much that isnt me that they have to charge for it now#on all platforms unless you straight up pirate it#and hey why would i of all people be needing to pirate a movie i own physically two times and digitally once#this is literally a personalized attack to me#and my mom was like i understand how you feel cause yeah thats really weird to do to a 1985 movie#and im like yes exactly i have morals and principles that make me opposed to this and its v maddening#and she said she understood and its ok next time we are having power issues and i have to shut down#that if i really wanna watch it i can rent it on her amazon account and i looked at her and shes like oh you feel v strongly about this#and i do! I HAVE HAD IT GIFTED TO ME TWICE ! I BOUGHT IT ONCE! WHY DO I HAVE TO RENT IT FOR MORE MONEY!
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DPxDC Headcanon: the title "King of the Infinite Realms" is misleading
Sure, there are indeed an infinite amount of worlds and dimensions across the multiverse. However, the name "Infinite Realms" is actually referring to the space in between said realms. The malleable borders that act as cushions to prevent all these realities from constantly colliding with each other. If you compare the worlds themselves to bones, then the Infinite Realms would be the cartilage preventing friction whenever they move.
So if Danny ever became the king of the Infinite Realms, he wouldn't actually have authority over whatever goes on within said realms. After all, each world has their own set(s) of afterlives and deities already taking care of that. No, Danny would only be in charge of that squishy, ectoplasmic stretch of space that portals need to punch holes through in order to cross over.
#dpxdc#headcanon#infinite realms#This could also factor into why Pariah Dark had to be stopped by the other ancients#He overstepped important dimensional boundaries and upset the balance of several worlds binding them together under his ownership#Those ectoplasm borders eroding away until whole dimensions almost collapsed into each other#Long story short tho#While the IR can be a useful way to connect the living realms to various afterlives#I don't think being in charge of the IR automatically makes you in charge of every realm adjacent to it#That'd be like saying owning a street automatically grants you ownership of the buildings connected to it#Oh yeah I tagged this as DPxDC because I was getting a smidge bored of those crossover fics where Danny overpowers the JL without a sweat#Like yes our boy is very powerful#but for fics where he's still a teen I think he should still have some growing to do on the combat side of things#Even with him as an adult I'm worried about turning him into this ultra unfair mary sue with full control of all existence
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what if i put my life in your hands? what if i took your life in mine?
#okay look there's a reason i've been obsessed with this scene for 21 slutty slutty years#imagine for a second you're yue#your master—whom you loved more than your own existence—decided his work was finished and didn't need you anymore#and he pushed you into the dark where you slept for centuries until a little girl woke you up by sheer dumb luck#you now are trapped in this horrible new era where everything is too loud and too fast and too bright#you're also trapped in a body that isn't yours jockeying for room with a completely separate soul that you don't know or particularly like#and you're draining your meager stores of magic to the dregs in order to keep the two of you alive#under the surface of tsukishiro yukito you're drowning—and the both of you are fading away entirely#and then this boy#pulls you to the surface of yourself#and says with his whole heart 'i won't let you disappear'#he smiles at you and teases you and then pours his not inconsiderable power into you#and you take and you take and you take and he never says stop#he never says only a little but no more#he holds you close and lets you sup on the very marrow of his magic until there's nothing left and he's simply an ordinary human#and for the first time in centuries—perhaps ever—you feel full#when you finally step away and ease his unconscious body onto the bed as gently as you can manage#you murmur that you ought to thank him#but it's such an inadequate way to convey your gratitude#how do you give thanks for what you've made him lose?#you put your life in his hands and he cradled it as if it were precious... and then he gave you his own in return#in the world before this one you would have been as good as wed#you thumb the swell of his cheek and allow yourself one last look at your would-be husband#and then turn around to face the threat behind the door#as it creaks open to reveal a little body wracked with sobs you think you would face anything that would dare come for him or his sister#not because it is your duty as the guardian of the cards#but because you love them#touya/yue#ccs#yue
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(It’s time for a 4halo ramble and analysis into their current relationship! Everything that follows is about the characters, I’m not using the q! because I’m lazy. I also want to repeat that while I am a 4halo shipper this entire rant is me explaining why I don’t want them to get together right now or anywhere in the near future. I don’t really consider this 4halo neg but let me know if you want me to tag it as such - they have the chemistry and in a distant future I could see it - but the fluffy 4halo that everyone seems to be imagining right now? I can’t see it happening. Toxic 4halo is another story entirely though and not what this ramble is about)
Okay you have been warned (THIS IS LONG):
not saying I’m not a huge 4halo enjoyer because. I am. But I do hope they don’t actually “become canon” or get into a relationship for the foreseeable future. Because the only realistic way that will end is in a giant, heart-wrenching break-up after like. 2 weeks. And I don’t see the ship recovering from that I’m gonna be honest.
Look. They can barely communicate as they are right now, any kind of committed relationship between them would end in fire and brimstone - especially when you take into account the power imbalance that is already causing problems.
Forever has not apologized for jailing Bad, even though Bad has asked for it (a rare show of communication on his part) and he might not apologize ever because he thinks he’s in the right. Somehow Cellbit is the only one to have apologized despite being the one calling for Bad’s head the most during the actual furniture incident. Anyway, Bad knows Forever thinks he’s in the right. And Bad also knows Forever wielded his presidential power to keep him jailed - so if Forever’s not sorry and he believes he was right, what’s to stop him from doing it again - in Bad’s mind, that is. There are actually quite a few things keeping him from doing it again, chief among them being that he doesn’t want to lmao. But Bad wouldn’t know that, would he?
I just- The imprisonment hurt Bad’s trust in everyone so badly that he destroyed every waystone in his base - and he when he found out Pac had someone gotten in anyway, he destroyed the waystone again. I don’t think people understand how long he’s been contemplating doing that. I don’t think people understand how many times he’s decided against destroying his waystones. It takes a pretty big fuck up to get him to do that. It takes a fuck-up of pretty tremendous proportions. And he did that last bit with Pac extremely recently too, which means he hasn’t forgotten.
And that - the whole furniture fiasco - that’s not a misstep that will just smooth over if Bad and Forever just care about each other hard enough. They already care about each other deeply - it didn’t stop the conflict. It’s not something everyone can just sweep under the rug with the power of love and no actual communication. Or at least I hope it’s not. It shouldn’t be. Any relationship the two get into right now will be steeped in distrust and wariness on Bad’s part due to the amount of power Forever can choose to use against him at any moment. And even if Forever hadn’t imprisoned him, that would still probably be the case, albeit to a much lesser extent. But Forever did imprison him, so now Bad’s not only wary of Forever turning on him in a hypothetical sense - he has past experience with that exact scenario. He has reason to distrust. It’s not paranoia in this instance; it’s genuine, rational distrust, which is even harder to alleviate.
By the way, that’s not even taking into account that Bad now knows of the existence of a drug that can brainwash Forever into potentially abusing his power against his own will. Think about how scary we all thought the drug-induced marriage proposals were. Think about how much scarier it would’ve been if Bad and Forever had actually been dating at the time. I’m not going to get into the risus potion here, or what implications it has for Bad’s trust in Forever - or more accurately, the trust he has in Forever’s position of power - because that’s too fucking complicated for my silly brain right now and this is long enough.
So basically: how is a relationship between a president and an anarchist supposed to work? Is Bad supposed to shut up, abandon his core principles, and do whatever Forever wants? When he opposes/attempts to help Forever improve the voting system he’s not being ‘immature’ - he’s acting in perfect accordance with his own belief system. There are points where he does act antagonist in an immature manner but in those instances he is very obviously being dramatic on purpose (and Forever does it as well). Him thinking Forever’s voting system isn’t fair isn’t him being immature, it’s just him being politically opposed. And Forever - what about Forever? Is Forever supposed to throw away his entire presidency? Oh, Bad’s an anarchist so that means Forever has to give up everything he’s worked so hard to accomplish, all the plans he has, all the good he’s desperately trying to do despite the fact that the nature of his position is scaring his loved ones away? He’s supposed to let everyone boss him around? Just because his crush hates government? Really? See, none of these options sounds particularly healthy, but their friendship isn’t even healthy right now so I can’t see them somehow reaching a better alternative.
Idk if you couldn’t tell I don’t like it when people non-jokingly boil down Bad and Forever’s political arguments as something that’ll be solved if one of them gives in or apologizes. Because they won’t. Because neither of them is wrong. Forever was partially right when he told Bagi that nothing he does as president will ever satisfy Bad - Bad is an anarchist, the fact that a government has been forced on him in the first place is already a fundamental problem - and that’s not wrong of him! It’s a genuine difference in beliefs and neither of them is wrong! Bad is not somehow automatically wrong because he’s an anarchist, and Forever is not somehow automatically wrong because he’s the president. Grrr bark woof grr bark, etc… you get what I mean.
(TLDR; if 4halo becomes canon right now it’ll crash and burn instantly and kill everyone on board which I don’t want to happen. Therefore I don’t wish for it to be canon.)
#please remember that while forever has the title of president the position is actually comparable in power to that of a king#he can actually do whatever he wants the only thing stopping him is his morals and the federation#and while q!forever himself may not realize that#q!Bad definitely. DEFINITELY does#and he’s behaving under the assumption that ‘morals and the federation’ is not a very strong power balancing system#partially because of his own moral code and what he would do in that position but even still he Knows what ‘president’ actually means#qsmp#qsmp analysis#4halo#taking minecraft political relationship drama WAY too seriously#q!badboyhalo#q!forever#neither of my perfect boys have ever done anything wrong ever and I refuse to accept otherwise
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Is this fanfic friendly? I feel like an outlier.
I guess this is my sign it's time to throw together a FAQ post to link to lol.
Yes, every event for this blog is fanfic friendly :D
Though as I mentioned on my Ominous October post, for events that include multiple short stories, I encourage everyone to flex their creativity and take one of their planned short story fanfics, and at least *attempt* to turn one of them into something entirely original; rebuilding a character and story from the ground up to stand on its own two legs is no easy feat, and that is what makes it so fun!
It really gets your creative gears turning, to make an "au of an existing material" to be something entirely original, and you can be pleasantly surprised about the things you come up with!
As a few people say, its not just a matter of "filing the serial numbers off" -- you have to add in just as much *or more* as what you take out when you are turning a fanfiction into something that is original and completely divorced from its original source material / inspiration, and that is a hard, but very rewarding challenge!
Obviously, this is not a requirement (there's no hard requirements for any of the challenges, other than no cheating, including no using AI),
but if you would like an extra challenge for the short story events and you're planning on doing entirely fan-fiction, I highly recommend trying it out at least once, and seeing where it leads you--
you may find yourself pleasantly surprised by what you find down that rabbit hole!
#replies#novella november#long rambly tags to follow lol#including anti royalist / anti billionaire shit#ominous october#this is what my novella november is going to be#something that WAS a huge earth-shattering fanfic AU#but before I even got past a WIP Oneshot I'd already realized that what I was planning was going to turn canon so far on its head it would#be unrecognizable and it would be much better off and more coherent if I made it entirely original#so now it is!#not only does this involve changing every single characters name#everyone is now a completely different species other than human because thats always fun#and of course we're also tackling all the issues that had annoyed me in omega verse fics since I was like 14 and liked the#creature aspects but hated the biological essentialism and misogny / caste systems#if your fantasy people have an enforced caste system you gotta actually treat that like the horror and systemic oppression it is#not just say 'biological = right' like dude what do you think people have been saying about real women this whole time????#people literally insist women are biologically inferior to men do you really think supporting that idea is going to make you sound#progressive just because your main character is a tomboy independant woman?#also like she lost all her independence as soon as she found a man to marry so uhhhhh#what happened to being ready and willing to hit the bricks if people kept talking down to you and condescending you for being a woman????#why did you go from independant badass tomboy to fainting damsel who spends all her time worrying about failing to produce an heir#so her husband can take power#instead of just straight up telling your husband#'hey I don't want to deal with the bullshit from your father how about we do the-#- socially acceptable thing and just go off to make our own independant settlement with some of the villagers who are on your side'#like your husband would literally be escstatic about this idea of finally getting out from under his dad's tyrannical thumb#and its more like way more than half the villagers would go with you not just a handful#theyve been sick of the kings shit for years and only your husband's potential rise to rule kept them in check#cus he actually cares about the villagers and goes among them#while still clearly having some biases to work through when it comes to class and gender equality
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“average marine endangers 100 civilians per year” actualy just statistical error. average marine endangers 0 civilians per year. the admirals, who are sent in to deal with the navy’s most destructive problems and love using scorched earth policies as a second resort, are outliers adn should not have been counted.
#riko.txt#i love them. i do. but 😭#do you think the grunts make shirts like I SURVIVED BEING UNDER FUJITORA’S COMMAND AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TSHIRT#i love fujitora. but he loves making his haters become craters when he hits them with his meteor and it does NOT matter who’s with him#maybe his men make him a shirt too. his says MOTHER FUCKER I WILL KILL US BOTH#like out of all of them fujitora and borsalino (and arguably aokiji) probably care about civilian casualties the most#bc to his credit fujitora can usually control his powers before anything real bad happens#and i’m not unconvinced that it’s not a practical joke. but still#and borsalino’s good at precision#they are better than akainu and ryokugyu who willfully and unhesitatingly kill their own#yet they remain Endangerment Georgs
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I want to preface this post by saying that I love the cat king as a character, especially one that has such a major impact on Edwin and his relationship with his queerness and learning to be okay with it; HOWEVER, I also believe that everyone that genuinely believes he should be a love interest for Edwin should read this. (Also if you just like the cat king as a character and want to understand his character better and why his and Edwin’s relationship is not something that would be healthy or “real” for either)
#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#the cat king#i do not ship them but I don’t want to hate on those who do (mostly) I just want to kind of inform people of the creators meaning for their#Relationship because I keep seeing people saying they hope they get together in s2 and it’s really confusing to me#Their relationship stems from the cat kings own narcissism and predatory behavior and Edwin’s need for someone to push him into under#Standing that his queerness doesn’t have to be torture and can be something giddy#even if he doesn’t return those feelings#The cat king does like Edwin but he doesn’t know anything about him. He likes the game and then he likes the kindness he’s shown despite#Knowing the cruelty he’s presented to Edwin#Queerness and preformance always go hand in hand#He’s a older secretly insecure character#Edwin is the younger#genuinely kind character that shows him that projecting his hurt will never get him what he wants#It’s about the isolation of queerness and the walls put up and the coping mechanism used to protect yourself even at the risk of hurting#Those just like you. That kiss from edwin was to say “I’m sorry your loneliness had caused you to be cruel. It’s the easiest way to feel.#And while I cannot and will not give you what you want or need#you deserve to feel happy and not like you have to gain the attention of uninterested people#I can’t even explain all my thoughts about their dynamic it’s just so much it’s just about the predadation from older queers because of#The trauma they’ve endured and the cycle of hurt and the way we can break the cycle with kindness while also protecting our youths by#Healing those traumas#Something the cat king learns and accepts#Off topic but I don’t like people defending their age gap because#Yes; Edwin is 86#but he died with a teenage boy brain and then spent 70 of those years in hell where he certainly was not getting his brain developed while#The cat king has possibly hundreds of years of sentience and experience. The power imbalance is not if y’all. And that part of their dynami#Is actually very clear I think but some people didn’t catch it?? Or didn’t care??? Idk man
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tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"
#bakuspeech#number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u#he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up#(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out)#we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment#and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here#but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something#but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku#but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this#this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and#that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing#but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it#its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with#and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually#I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay#but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol#not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real#and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself#and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god#that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao#but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them#have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway
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Hi, I was the anon that had brought up the high seas adventure!! I'm glad you took interest in it, and hearing your ramblings to add onto it just made me imagine so many fun things! (Poor Eddie, haha. With your description, I just imagine a dog trying to stand up in a moving car.) Ohh, now I imagine a case where the ship wrecks and their stranded for a few days until another rescue ship comes! Perhaps on an island?? I hope some of them know how to hunt!
the very first thing that came to mind was Eddie sobbing while pointing one of Howdy's guns at a crab. Sally just comes up & stabs it through the shell before taking it back to the fire for eating. Eddie collapses to his knees, wracked with guilt-
#frank & sally arguing over how to build the S.O.S signal#frank wants to be tactical. sally wants to go full Elizabeth in potc - giant bonfire#frank wins the argument due to popular vote#hard cut to everyone standing in the water staring at the Very On Fire island#anyway eddie's 'i wouldnt hurt a fly' statement makes me think that he would not be able to kill anything on purpose#hunt? nah hes just gonna forage. crack open a coconut on a rock. try that weird mushroom#meanwhile wally & howdy are chatting about the weather while spearfishing#for some reason im imagining an almost entirely barren island#like theres five trees & a nice patch of vegetation#but the rest is barren sand w/ the shipwreck on a nearby sandbar#hm yes thats where their camp is. huddled under the half overturned ship <3#the water between the bar & the island is shallow enough for the big neighbors to wade through#lots of fish for dinner!#rambles from the bog#wh fantasy au#lmao wait ok so wally has this ability where he can turn abandoned doors into portals#(it takes a lot of energy & power so its a last resort trick)#so im imagining that a week or so into this impromptu banishment#frank goes 'wait. wally you can do the door portal thing'#and they all go OHHHH SHIT and start building their own door out of the ship's wood#oh hey... what if that island becomes an emergency escape / stash for the neighborhood...#tight spot? no where else to go? they have a remote island camp!
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I feel like the post I just reblogged pointing out the all-or-nothing in how many people interact with their deconstruction of systems of oppression is resonating for me right now with so many different moments in my life where someone decides that because some part of myself has access to some of the levers of control/influence/etc that come with the relationship to power, and decides what that must mean about all the other parts of me that might be explicitly refused access to those same levers.
It has happened in so many spaces/aspects of my life, and it can be so hard to feel safe and seen and trusting of others when that's my chronic relationship to being perceived - half truths and obfuscation.
It doesn't really change regardless of who's doing the assuming either. Like, where they land in relation to systems of power may influence which direction they lean in their assumptions about me, but even that is often inconsistent. Both sides of the equation (those who share my marginalizations and those who exist in spaces of closer proximity to power) will still do it nonetheless.
When I was doing my liminal social identities work in undergrad, this was actually a big part of the conceptualization we explored of traumtic alienation of self as individual from self as collective, and what it can do to people to exist in this liminal relationship with your environment and the people in it. As I'm starting to gather my thoughts about my stress modeling, this conceptualization is bubbling back to the surface. I'm finding myself meandering through it on both a path specifically my own, and in an effort to better understand what other paths may be available to people during their version of the process/experience.
Selfhood is so fragile, and so in need of balance between self-construction and co-construction for us humans, and that gives us so many beautiful, even spiritual, experiences of meaning making and generativity of self. It also createa many pivot points where we may find room in our path for vulnerability or blurring of self. As much as these pivot points can be distressing, I think they also sometimes become our foundations of change/personal evolution, when we find that through the distress of existing in shift, something meaningful is occurring or observable in our experience of self-in-transition.
I think something I've valued especially about my own relationship with self is its transience. It doesn't always end up somewhere I would be happy to sustain, but it always allows me a degree of comfort in complexity that I think has made my body-mind a safer place for me overall.
#one day i will understand how to convey self in a way that is Mine and also Effective Communication#but lord knows it ain't today#it's always so interesting to me the way people decide to position me in their social/power schema#the funny thing i think is that even as a toddler people seemed to assign me a seriousness and gravity of social value that was both#irrational and inexplicable and in many cases wildly inappropriate#apparently one of my auntie's got in a bad way of 'consulting' me like her personal spiritual guide when I was like#two years old????#and she had to be like#you can't keep talking to my toddler about this stuff#that's an extreme one but like#it's also in line with the trend#i don't think people realize how dehumanizing it feels to be Assigned Moral and Social Weight and Value like that#it makes it so painfully clear to me that i am expected to manage to accommodate everyone's needs while never having#or at least never expressing or acknowledging in the presence of others#any needs of my own regardless of their impact on me#sometimes I think people assume that I went into the fields I did as like. a white knight type motivation#or like#that going into the field is what's made me the way I am#and like.#not really. it's more that I knew my role in life was 'other people's emotional regulation/go-to anchor' as long as I've had self-concept#and at a certain point you've been playing that role long enough that your options are either#become a subject matter expert and contributer to the field#or fucking kill yourself#because you certainly can't keep doing what you're doing#i dunno. i guess i just wished there was anyone in my life i trusted to see me as the fully complexified and messy human I am#i might feel a little less like i'm the only real thing in my life#anyway i think i'm gonna go. dissociate out of existence for a while before i get the kind of suicidal that's going to worry wifey#i don't think i can cope with needing to regulate her out of an anxiety response right now and i understand that means i can't need care atm#you ever just get the feeling that you're drowning under the weight of the needs you just can never seem to meet? i do.
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i'm the antonymph of the internet
#how many tributes to this song will i make in my life#MANY ! it literally changed my life and means a lot to me. i love antonymph and vylet pony's music is worth checking out - please do.#unsupervised internet access as a queer neurodivergent kid anthem !!#i chose to do misty since we all know i like drawing her in experimental pieces and putting her in outfits. she also has art in a gir hoodi#from the clash team in treasure trove!! :D#this is also experimental/stylistic as well!! had fun!! nice to just draw something in one day and not worry. leaves me tired but...#haven't done a nice piece like so in one day in a while!!! i'm very proud :] it's a fun one#anyways... both a little tribute to the song and misty as a character#ihave so many thoughts about misty even if i dont talk publicly on them. shes a very interesting character to me and i care about her so#much. i compared her to fluttershy in the past - and realized that if i liked ttcc as a kid she would've been my favorite.#fluttershy on her own meant a lot to me as a child. including mlp itself as it's one of the core things that got me into drawing art online#a lot of my analysis on misty and headcanons at least on the more emotional scale do come from a bit of projecting but...it makes it more#fun to me when i can put myself into the shoes of a character like her who i already relate to. rrghh too bad im scared to talk about her#too much in nuanced detail in public since some people are... not so nice about her. though i know the tumblr audience is nice and unders#standing!!#anyways from me just having fun being me#i let misty have a little bit of fun... something i think she would possibly enjoy? i do see her as someone who gets nostalgic#and is stuck in more childish things and matters. she wants to play ip dip with you...its very sweet to me. letting myself and her be#confident through a song that means so much to me is kind of powerful to me. i had a lot of fun making this drawing.#anyways. love this song. love ttcc. love mity /p. be swag and be self indulgent and have fun. you can do anything u want forevah#toontown#toontown corporate clash#antonymph#guz art#rainmaker
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Can I know more about the mafia highschool au? Like is it a normal school with just a bunch of mafia kids or is there an actual mafia curriculum? What was Momo's reaction when she found out she was pregnant? Is Mimi still the Rat King? Curious minds would like to know 🥺💜✨
Djkdkd it piqued your interest, huh? x'D
It's an actual mafia hs! 90% of the people there are mafia affiliated, and in order for outsiders to be brought into the school, they have to be sponsored by a current student! The current student has to vouch for the outsider's capabilities and also take responsibility for them. For example, Reborn sponsored Miruku! He is now a mentor figure to him and is guiding him to be what he feels is a splendid mafia member. [The thing is, everyone here are teens, so while the arcobaleno are still powerful, they aren't as experienced or cool headed as their adult counterparts! Reborn, in this au, isn't as gentlemanly towards femme presenting people! It's something he works more towards later. He still treats them better than male presenters but thats because he is a misandrist. Another example: Fon has a temper!!!]
The one who sponsored Momina is actually Luce! Luce is a great help to Momina due to both of them being spiritually inclined. However, with how Colonello [and Lal] are... they, of course, decided to snatch Momina away and also force teachings onto her. Luce is still Momina's actual mentor, though!
The blood, sex and violence are ramped up in this school. It's normal for students to be killed by other students [Squalo just murdering Dino's bullies because they were in the way, for example...] so this kind of pushes people into confessing, having sex, etc. They feel they can die any time so YOLO!!!
I like to think there is actually a mafia curriculum on top of the normal curriculum. "All the ways you can poison someone", "espionage", etc. They get sent on missions...
Momina has major brainrot!!! She was so happy to be a mother while married to Hayato. [Yeah... they got married while underage. Yeah, Hayato forced religious leaders to allow the marriage to happen... Momina thought it was so sweet! She just said don't threaten them in the house of God!! Him complying was endearing! :) ]
It's so funny because Jojo was like "Luce does not approve of them moving so fast while so young" LIKE SHE WASN'T ALSO PREGNANT DJDJDJD difference is Luce claimed her husband Roberto as her husband when they were 5 so it's Totally Different. [Luce's reasoning, probably!]
LET THE RAT KING MIMI GO
Mimi is kind of one?? He was wandering the sewers for Cavallone lost treasure, and Dino went with him...he complained every step of the way until Mimi actually found it. Dino is now convinced Mimi is a lucky charm and brings him places, btw.
I could keep going, but let me stop here!!! 😭✋🏾
#nimo's fantastical replies#lili#lixenn#this au is so CHAOTIC#Jojo and I are still coming up with their uniforms#other things bc its in the tags so its fine to go on#Dino/Enma and Tsuna are the Loser Trio#Dino runs his mouth the most so he gets his ass beat the most#things change as Dino grows taller and bigger and he starts encouraging Enma and Tsuna to#also kick these ppls teeth in!!!#all this + Dino's father dying and him having to take on a lot of responsibility#the ecosystem goes crazy bc the arcobaleno have a lot of power and sway#Kyoya allows it for the most part bc they keep the school strong#but to be frank if they clash it gets ugly bc they all rather do their own thing AND NOT FOLLOW ANYONE ELSE#when Byakuran shows up he kind of forces everyone under his thumb#we imagined this was after the arcobaleno graduate!#Mimi is kind of an honorary arco member#not really but also he says he is a pet#they gave him a bean bag and he has a mini fridge full of soda#skull complains!!! why does he get all this!?!?#they tell him to stfu and fill the fridge up#Skull is the arco gopher#no one else can mistreat skull tho fjdjjd bc#reborn would say that was mistreating HIM so its personal#ok I'll stop lol#sorry for errors bc I am sneezing coughing so bad rn
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character who is so powerful that their presence itself overgoes all consent, where the other characters exist below their desires and are made to please them, regardless of whether they want to or not.
esp when the character isn't even relatively domineering or authoritative during it. instead they're completely passive. whimpering and twitching and overall being so lost in pleasure that leaves no space for action, much less coercion. they're a passive receiver of pleasure.
except they, as an existence, cannot be passive. they're mingling with godhood, they're bigger than themselves, than their body, their pleasure holy and divine and all-encompassing. their touch a religious experience.
to have them, a compulsion, more than an action born of actual personal desire
#f.txt#this is pretty much what's at the core of how i see gojo and anakin#i see them both very similarly#chosen one and honored one#presences that altered the trajectory of the world#the similarities between the force and infinity#also they're both bottoms <3#like. just. they're too powerful. a vergence in the force. someone who was so powerful he started spawning stronger curses.#being in the vicinity of either of them could kill a normal person#HOW can u ever even THINK of denying them#it's just wrong. u can't#ur own will is nothing under theirs. their whims and desires. u're going to give them what they want whether u like it or not#i just love them a lot. i love my powerful godlike boys so much#gojo#anakin#BUT ALSO. at a certain point.#it all blurs together doesn't it?#bc the other character DOES want the god-like character. but how much of it is actually desire born from themselves?#is their desire not born of the other's stifling desire?#if a god wants to be loved. do u have any say in loving them?#i do not ever shut up about this im sorry it is my SHIT
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love watching weather science videos but like. why am i 1000x more interested in tornadoes over hurricanes. they're both spinning air
#we wanted to be a stormchaser when we were younger#nowadays we have to worry about our health too much to have such a risky high-stress high reaction time job#been watching nothing but tornado history videos for days it's one of our intermittent special interests#stemming from the weather science workbook we OBSESSED over as a kid#would read that thing cover to cover multiple times a week. i was the kind of autistic who would read the Encyclopedia for fun#i actually had a fave encyclopedia entry as a kid and now i cannot fucking remember it 😭#i also learned what sex was through the encyclopedia 😭😭😭😭 was legit my first exposure to the concept#but like even though we watch A TON of weather videos including tons of stuff about thunderstorms and blizzards#(thunderstorms my fucking beloved. favourite weather pattern ever. cumulonimbus my bestest friend <3)#most of the videos we watch are mostly tornado videos. and hurricane videos feel boring to us#even though hurricanes are wayyy more powerful#tornadoes are still fucking powerful it's just more. concentrated#tornadoes to me feel Targeted like. that's weather that says Fuck YOU in particular actually#especially multivortex tornadoes where you can literally have two houses both in the middle of the storm at once#and still only one of them gets destroyed#or like pictures you can see of demolished houses with their mailbox in the yard simply untouched#i like to watch tornado videos bc they help me. prepare. just in case#our state gets hit with tornadoes pretty frequently though not as much as tornado alley#and i like to know all the information for sheltering and what to do in the event of a collapsed building and such#i have a little survival kit in the bathroom just in case with like basic first aid and a radio and bottled water#bc thats probably the safest room for me to be in since it's not near any external walls and also hiding in the tub is usually good#also in the event you're caught on the road during a tornado#DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE shelter under a bridge or overpass#those work basically like straws where as the air gets pushed through it goes MUCH faster and gets dangerous way easier#as far as im aware the best place to be is in a ditch or hole if you absolutely cannot find a shelter in time#if you do not have a car with roll protection then being in your car will probably be worse#NOT AN EXPERT THO pls verify this information on your own if you think it is relevant or necessary i have poor memory and can be stupid#i just know that overpasses are dangerous as hell
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VAMP ROGER AU QUESTION! how would he and barnabas interact together (if they ever interact)? :3 💜
tagging @tortoisesshells because she's my co-conspirator <3
excellent question! this family and their sharp-toothed men will be the death of ... well, several community members of Collinsport, i suppose.
to start — Barnabas gets out of the box slightly differently than in canon, which colors his relationship to Roger and the rest of the household. Roger kills Willie after his attempted assault on Carolyn and Vicki (who is, by that point, his wife); Willie's mysterious disappearance and Roger's suspected involvement makes Jason that much more panicked, desperate, and correspondingly aggressive. Liz goes searching for the lost family jewels in a last-ditch attempt to buy Jason off, and, inadvertently, lets their ancient family sin out of the tomb.
ergo she's made Barnabas' thrall instead of Willie, but this goes unnoticed for a while — even though her brother would, in theory, recognize the signs, and his suspicions are raised, but she's already acting so much unlike herself with Jason around that he doesn't suspect anyone else of doing her harm. yet.
at the start, he and Barnabas get along very well, even before they discover their shared affliction: they're both relatively sophisticated, well-traveled, intelligent people, and for all that Roger decries Liz's emphasis on the Collins name, he leans towards familial connections instinctively (Roger hasn't got much in the way of friends outside of the house even in canon, and he's even more isolated as a vampire).
after he finds out Barnabas is also a vampire, things get a little more complicated, but overall, they're still friendly. Roger doesn't have much sympathy for Barnabas' relentless self-pity and decrying his doomed fate to live as a monster, because Roger on the whole enjoys his vampirism and has made a decent un-life for himself out of it (thanks in no small part to Vicki). but having someone like him around is a comfort in ways he wouldn't have expected, he's no longer solitary or uniquely monstrous out of the Collins family, he has someone else around through the night, and someone who understands the sufferings of bloodthirst and being shut out of the sun.
furthermore, Roger's very much interested in his family history and stories of the past, the building of Collinwood, Jeremiah's ships – and Barnabas was there. there's potential for some very interesting conversations about the past, and the arc of the Collins family history to the present, not to mention literature, travel, fashion, politics and the rest. Roger's his cousin's mirror in modernity in many ways, and that's something potentially interesting to explore: the world changes around them, but Collinses do not.
as an aside, they both have a funny sort of relationship to Burke. Barnabas hates him for his resemblance to Jeremiah and envies his friendship with Vicki and thinks he's crude, and Roger ... well. it's complicated. it's closer to antagonism than not, and Burke has tried to kill him once in this au, and Roger resents his flirting with Vicki, but then there's everything else with their past. so I don't think Barnabas' treatment of him would sit particularly well with Roger, he'd take the attitude of hey, only I can be a dick to Burke >:(
the definite fracture point is Barnabas imprinting on Vicki. Roger's already jealous and possessive by nature, and it's amplified by the supernatural nature of his relationship to Vicki (being closer, bodily and mentally; being necessary to each other; being, quite literally, sustenance) so he's already a little on edge when Barnabas starts paying attention to her, giving her presents, and appreciating the scenery — Barnabas doesn't, exactly, tend to have much in the way of moral inclination to leaving women alone when they have prior engagements, but it's fair to point out the irony of everything Roger was doing with his bloodbag governess when he was still very much a married man.
anyway: Roger finds foreign bite marks on his wife's neck, and he's understandably immensely upset by this. partially out of territorial sentiment, but he also knows Vicki, and he knows that she wouldn't have invited another vampire willingly — which means that she was forced, or hypnotized, or attacked in secret, and there's only the one potential suspect. this is already enough to lose his good will, but he might have been willing to let Barnabas go with a "hands off," had this discovery not lead to finding out what he'd also been doing to Liz. the combination of the two is unforgivable, and it's Barnabas' error to have made an enemy who is very personally aware of all his vampiric weaknesses, and Burke's already carved a stake.
#THANK YOUUUU for the question :D i love talking about this au kskfgd#devilagent#vamp roger au tbt#➤ answered. ┊ Collinsport 4099.#i do think the barnabas and roger relationship is an interesting one even though there's not much going on there in canon.#(canonically speaking roger is just sort of... there? even during cassandra he doesn't ever pity him for being a victim in the scheme;#it's grrr angelique is here messing with *Me* again. who cares about my oblivious dumb blonde cousin)#but there's a lot of parallels going on there which I never shut up about: the way that roger will drain life from a man#to preserve his own; or manipulate and throw others (vicki) under the bus;#or makes david (not biologically in human reproduction) into a monster just like him — forming him and burke in his image.#roger is Modern in ways that barnabas is not — the sports cars; the en vogue suits and turtlenecks; his flippant relationship with his vows#and his (relatively speaking) more-or-less open queerness.#but he's also a creature out of the past; an antiquated speaking pattern; an embrace of old family stories (particularly tragedies);#not to mention he plays the role of a byronic hero practically straight out of the novel just without any sideburns.#roger simultaneously wishes to be free of that family root system; but falls back on it in desperation because it's only because his#ancestry and family wealth and power exists that *he* exists at all.#and in the same way that joshua cannot shoot barnabas for becoming a monster; neither can liz condemn her brother for his manslaughter#(or david for patricide)#but even though they don't die; they are exiled — to the tomb; to augusta — and return as mere shadowed and monstrous versions#of their former selves.#many of the differences between vamp roger and barnabas I think can be partially explained by: roger did not have the 150 year gap between#being turned and coming back; he returns to essentially the same world he knew just ten years ago#and; two; that roger has his great yearning love *after* he's turned; and not before.#there's nothing about his life with laura and david that he particularly mourns or wishes to recreate.#and; as already noted; roger has vicki — who serves as necromancer;#which... I suppose parallels julia; in an odd way.
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