#He’s a older secretly insecure character

[yuripira4e]

I want to preface this post by saying that I love the cat king as a character, especially one that has such a major impact on Edwin and his relationship with his queerness and learning to be okay with it; HOWEVER, I also believe that everyone that genuinely believes he should be a love interest for Edwin should read this. (Also if you just like the cat king as a character and want to understand his character better and why his and Edwin’s relationship is not something that would be healthy or “real” for either)

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

On David Tennant and Aging

So, I’ve seen a lot of posts in response to Tumblr users’ habit of affectionately calling their favorite middle aged dudes “old men”, David Tennant in particular, saying things like “clearly you’ve never met an actual old person”, “omg you talk about these guys like they’re 80”, “please be normal about people aging”, etc. And on one hand, all of these statements are objectively right and true! But as someone who’s always been really fascinated by and found a lot of beauty in getting older (which I’ve explored in some of my writing on A03 because nobody else is going to do it for me), I’d like to provide a bit more nuance on how I think this label applies to David in particular.

David, obviously, in literal terms, is not “old”, at least not to me- I don’t personally consider people old until they get past 60. 52 is middle aged, simple as that. And yet, when I see David stuck with the “old man” label, it still somehow feels weirdly right, for a number of reasons.

It annoys me so much when people say David “hasn’t aged a day since Doctor Who”, because, well…

He clearly has. A lot. He’s got forehead creases, deep crows’ feet and eyebags, and I think that post-Fourteen we’re gonna see him rocking the grey temples a LOT more. He also has the voice of an older man now, his upper range is still there but the default is much more deep and rich, with a gravelly, rumbling quality that just goes straight through you. I personally think Broadchurch was when David finally started to embrace looking his age- Alec Hardy just wouldn’t have been served by Ten’s fresh-faced boyishness.

Obviously, these are the kinds of changes you’d expect any 52-year-old man to have, but something about David just makes it all seem a bit more… intense? The expressiveness of his face combined with his almost gaunt frame makes his wrinkles very prominent, and when he works his voice to its emotional extremes, his lower register can sound positively ancient, to devastating effect.

David, I think, is someone with an old soul- I don’t think he could be as good as he is at playing ancient characters like Crowley and The Doctor if he weren’t. He has lived so many lives, given so much of himself to so many characters, often incredibly tragic ones, and I think it wears on him. David also has five kids. FIVE. Do you know how exhausting it is to be one of the hardest working actors alive and be a present, loving father to even ONE child? But David somehow does it anyway! Nowadays I see him and my heart breaks because he looks so tired, so weary and fragile. But he’s all the more beautiful for it to me because I know that that is because he is kind. He’s a deeply empathetic person who feels and lives to the absolute fullest, and that story is written so clearly on his face, along with every other story he has ever been a part of.

There’s other things about David that make the label endearingly fitting- his utter hopelessness when it comes to technology, for instance. And he’s just got that warm, wise, grandpa energy too sometimes- look at that above Fourteen picture and tell me I’m wrong!

I once showed my friend who’d only seen David in Doctor Who and Harry Potter a picture of David from Around The World in 80 Days. It was a particularly emotional scene, and his face had just the most beautiful expression of compassion and sadness, every wrinkle on full display. And she said, in a less than complimentary fashion, “he looks so old!” Which, of course, offended me quite a bit at first. But to me, referring to David as old almost feels like a badge of honor, something he’s earned by living fully and selflessly, working hard and being wise and compassionate beyond his years. I think David himself is secretly more than a little insecure about the fact that he’s getting older. There’s sadness behind every jovially self-depreciating remark he’s made about his age in the past year, particularly in comparing himself to Ncuti Gatwa. I know how much David struggles with his impostor syndrome and how people perceive him, and I can clearly see in his eyes the fear of being discarded, the anxiety he feels about if he’ll still be as loved as he was back in 2007 now that he’s closer in age to King Lear than he is to Romeo. So I hope David knows it’s a privilege to watch him grow older, to watch his soul and talents deepen with the crinkles around his eyes. If I, in my silly goofy tumblr girl-ness, call David Tennant an old man, it’s because it’s a label that suits him beautifully- even if it isn’t TECHNICALLY an accurate one yet.

[rnn11203]

I really love Sebastian. I think hes a great character and im sad that hes often brushed off as just some emo boy. Im sure a lot of what i think can be said as headcanons but i feel like if needed i could really have a convincing argument for why i think all of this.

But anyways, Sebastian is very anti social. He says so himself that he doesnt really enjoy the company of others, but i dont really think that he views other people as bothersome or annoying or like a hassle. I think hes afraid of being vulnerable, his inferiority complex doesnt allow him to be open or honest with others because hes afraid of what they’d think about him. I think his relationship with Sam and Abigail is very surface level, i dont view their relationships as very deep or intimate. I think Sebastian could be seen as a chill but solemn guy by the rest of the community but its really cute that he’s secretly very nerdy. He likes comics, dnd, and web design.

I really love that hes a bad older brother, i too am an older brother who feels like ive disappointed my younger siblings, i was supposed to be there for them but instead i let my insecurity, my jealousy of our parents affection, and ultimately my feelings of inferiority get in the way. Is it selfish to want to be loved? I dont think so, but it is selfish to let it get in the way of loving others. I think Sebastian feels guilty over the way he behaved towards Maru, im not sure if i think they’d ever reconnect.

I headcanon their ages as 22 and 18, it must’ve been difficult for Sebastian to cope with his father’s absence and such a sudden change. I think he wouldve felt casted aside, almost like he was being replaced. I think Sebastian grew up in pelican town, that the house was built prior to his parents split, i like to think that him and maru shared a room up until he was 12? Maybe 13? And insisted to live in the basement instead. I think he wouldve been satisfied with that but slowly he realized that no one was really interested in checking on him, instead of communicating it he’d internalize it, lash out by spending even more time alone. I think both Robin and Demetrius love him, but excuse it as personality differences. However Sebastian in game seems kinda prone to emotional outbursts, instead of acknowledging something is wrong his parents just think hes just the more difficult sibling. I also think that he had loose contact with his bio dad, but the bastard suddenly stopped responding at all so he further convinces himself that he is unwanted. “Would it really matter, if I just disappeared?”

It’s really interesting that in his 2heart event he says “They’re engaging, straightforward, and unselfish. Quite the opposite of a lot of people I know." I wonder who that refers to? Is Demetrius boring? Sam a bit scrambled? Abigail selfish? (I say Abigail is the selfish one bc he expresses discontent about her coming over and disregarding his work in the same scene).

But really, i think Sebastian just wants to feel like he belongs. I think the farmer makes him feel comfortable, valued, and understood. I really like that about him.

[decadentworld]

Rebirth.

Billy’s first time with you.

※ Bottom Billy Hargrove/Top Male Reader

※ 11,270 words

※ Personal work (not request).

※ Content & warnings: First time bottoming. Crying during sex. Angst. Light D/s dynamics (Sub Billy Hargrove/Dom Male Reader). Emotional sex. Vulnerability. Praise kink. Sort of PWP. Overstimulation.

※ Both characters are 18 or older.

※ Work available only on Tumblr and under ArchiveOfOurOwn pseud of the same name (DecadentWorld). Do not repost, edit, or redistribute. Do not use for TikTok videos.

※ Warning: this gets real sad, real fast.

“Hey…”, you ask the man after you’ve paused your kissing. “…you okay?”

Currently, you have Billy pressed against the wall next to your bedroom door. Your house’s dim lighting puts this very moment into focus, as though time is concentrated into a needlepoint. There is not a single thing you’d rather be doing than this. Him. The sole fact that he’s yours is already enough to keep you up at night.

His gaze lowers and he looks elsewhere, not at you, never at you at this time. That’s one of the things that drew you in to him like a moth to a flame. That little detail, the fact that, out there, he has to be so very him: boisterous, dangerous, loud, bigger than life… but in this pocket of space you both call home, that he tentatively calls his safe space, he can finally be him: vulnerable, insecure, shy, small.

So he does not look at you, never at you, and rather lowers his head to a side as he nods as a response to your question. There’s a pinched expression in his face that does not go unnoticed by you.

“Y’sure?” Your lips find the left side of his forehead. “You still wanna…?”

Because this is a huge step, isn’t it? It’s what you’ve both been discussing for some time now. He wants to go further. And hell, it wasn’t easy for him to say it at all. Said it somewhat similarly to the way he’s looking right now. Quiet. Meek. Looking elsewhere.

But your boy is so brave. Secretly trembles in the adversity of society’s opinion on people like him and you and still pushes forward with a bold front, told you he wants you to be his first in this aspect.

“Mmm-hmm,” is his answer. He doesn’t notice, of course, but his hands, the ones holding your own arms, which at this time are around his waist, start trembling more and more, a minute thing that only you can perceive.

“Okay.” An easy answer, because you can’t make this complicated to him, not when he’s like this. “We can still stop anytime—”

“Don’t wanna fuckin’ stop.” And, oh, he’s grunting it out now. Now, he’s turned into the spitting image of a cornered animal, and you have to tread carefully. When he’s like this it’s because his emotions are getting the best of him. You know he’s nervous.

Your right hand finds its way to his chin. You lift his face up, until he’s facing you, though his eyes are not quite there yet. Still pointedly looking to his right, to the floor, even as he’s under your intense gaze and visibly getting hotter under the collar, more flustered, his breathing heavier.

“Look at me, Blue.” It’s not quite an order. It will not be unless you both discuss it in depth first.

The few inches you have on him mean he has to —slowly, painstakingly— look up at you, and isn’t that a heady feel? To have such a beautiful man look up in wonder at someone or something bigger than him? Someone who can envelop him completely and seal him away from the world’s horrors?

“This is your call, yeah? I want what you want.” The knuckles of your right hand brush against his pink cheek. He traces the movement with something akin to uncertainty. “And if you, right now, want to flee this house, I won’t stop you.”

“Then why did you stop?” There’s a croak in his voice. His eyes fight to stay on yours, and there’s a shine on them that wasn’t there before. “Why d’you think I wanna stop? Huh?”

You give him a small rueful smile he watches perplexed. “Babe… you haven’t stopped shaking like a leaf since we set foot in my room—”

“No I’m n— I’m not. Shaking.” And his head is back in that position. Not looking at you in any way.

You purse your lips. Your arms that were around his waist again untangle some, until your hands are pressed against the low of his back. His hands, that were holding onto your arms, move with the jostling. At the same time you rub against his back, feeling the littlest squirm against them, you lower your mouth to his cheek.

The gentle treatment compels him to press more of himself against you, still not looking at you properly, but wondering what got into you to hold him like this.

“It’s okay to be nervous.”

“I’m not.”

A gentle kiss on the cheek. A trembling sigh in response. “I know you are, and I’m not judging you for it.” Another kiss, this time lower, on the jaw. “I just want you to know…” A kiss on the jugular, like an animal playing with its prey, and Billy feels as if he were right into the wolf’s fauces with how fast that same vein is beating against your mouth. “…that you don’t have to pretend with me.” One on the juncture of his neck and shoulder and the trembling he’s trying to deny so indubitably only worsens. Then, a series of kisses, tracing that same path backwards, as you punctuate each with a word: “I. Will. Take. Care. Of. You.”

A last kiss on the corner of his mouth, and you have his full attention. Your faces are so close that you could just close your eyes and still feel the heat coming off his.

And his eyes. It’s almost an obsession now. You thought they were blue before, like the gentle waves he could relax on during the quietest pockets of his life before coming to this city. But now. Now they’re somehow accentuated. No longer calm, but the imposing waves during a thunderstorm in the middle of the ocean.

Because the white of his eyes has progressively turned more red and the lighter blue of his eyes could save any lost man at sea.

You don’t comment on this as of now. Just the fact that he’s already like this, and you haven’t done much yet, speaks volumes about how much trust he’s putting into you. The subtle tremble in the space between his eyebrows, the much more visible one of his chin, right under his drooping lips…

You nuzzle your noses together and that somehow seems to be his breaking point. He heaves, blinks in rapid succession, and looks like he’s having a battle with himself, head turning to the side again but coming back, always coming back to you. Then, decided, tilts his head up more, directing those stormy eyes on yours and then your lips.

“You’ll… You’ll take care of me?” His voice is no more than a croak.

In response, your hands seek his. Once they find them, you guide them towards his chest and towards themselves, something that confuses him at first. His arms are now fully folded against himself. Then, your arms encircle his body. You make sure there’s not a breath of space between you.

This is how you envelop him completely. You are his shield, and nothing can get to him.

His heavy breathing is shaky as well. You nuzzle the side of his face and that draws him in.

“Always.”

It seems the waterworks are about to start for him, so he quickly hides it by kissing you, full on the mouth this time.

This is not nervousness over the sex as a physical act, you realize. This is something bigger. You leave this thought aside for a second as you return the kiss with all the affection you can muster. Your arms that are encircling his body start lowering as you leave soft smacks of your lips on his, until they’re only around his waist. But his own arms are still where you left them; he’s afraid of breaking this bubble you created.

Finally, your hands set on his hips. They start caressing the clothed skin there, and, in this moment of catharsis you’ve bestowed upon him you can feel him writhe against your hands, a small, happy thing you notice is grounding him.

His arms are still in the same position when you withdraw. When you do, he chases after you, but quickly retracts in shame.

“Oh, sweetness, you want more?”, you mumble close to his lips, noticing how he sighs in pleasure at this.

So you give him more. One short kiss against his lips, two more, loud smacking noises in the silent room, and then a small bite on his lower lip that makes his body vibrate.

He withdraws with a loud gasp but does not stop looking at you in yearning. His hands finally lower to find yours and he guides them to his heaving chest. His chest, the most of which is uncovered, since the man can absolutely not wear a shirt without undoing at least three of its buttons.

Billy is so brave, so good to you, he made the first move to let you know it’s okay to have this, to have him. Your hands find the hairless skin and the contact is electric. He heaves heavy breath after breath and can’t seem to decide whether to look at you or at the point of contact, because your hands feel so good on him, on his chest, such an unassuming place that would bring him so much pleasure. And his chest is so warm, too. Your fingers splay over the upper part of it, and you can’t believe how much heat irradiates off him. The tips of your fingers manage to touch his clavicles while the lowest parts of your palms press softly lower down his chest. And —this is what gets you the most— Billy blushes everywhere. The center of his chest is such a beautiful shade of pink, the same or similar to the one on his freckled face, that you just can’t help but rub both hands on the expanse of his pectorals. You feverishly wonder if your hands can leave a brand on his skin, because it seems to be turning an ever darkening shade, and you realize it’s only your own effect on Billy’s sensitive skin.

His hands have been holding onto your wrists, directing only at first but now just resting there, or holding on for dear life, you can’t tell. The only thing you understand is that you have to get your hands —and your mouth, dear god. Your mouth— on those pretty pink nipples, so you start a slow, sinful massage of your fingertips over the meat of his pecs, something that seems to agitate him even more with how heavy he’s breathing now. His mouth is open, he’s fully looking at you now, like he can’t believe his life has finally lead to this point.

And then, the palms of your hands graze across his nipples, and his body seizes. He makes this small, broken noise that catches your attention, and he doesn’t want you to look at him, he seems so embarrassed, as if he doesn’t want you to see how affected he is with just this. But you’re ruthless in your mercy, and bring your face closer to his, nuzzling close to his nose again, and he’s wordless as you begin a sensual massage from the center of those two pleasure points outwards, the entirety of your hands on him.

Another broken noise, this time more choked off than the first one. Your faces are so close together that it would only take a small push to kiss again, but you don’t. Your lips are right there, barely coming in contact with his, not kissing while you continue this erotic touch, and you’re now basically breathing the same air. You have an exhilarating thought: maybe he’s more pent up about the fact that you won’t close the distance between your lips than about the fact that you’re outright feeling up his chest. Because, truly, his desire only grows bigger when it’s not acted upon.

Your hands lower to the sides of his chest, underneath his shirt. Your thumbs press against his nipples.

His body curls into you, and then his head knocks against the wall behind him, and you can perfectly see the expression he makes and hear the song he sings for you and you just…

You’re the one to cave in. This kiss is a masterpiece of a choreography: the force of it almost knocks him back against the wall. His hands hold onto your wrists for dear life as he feels his body move on its own, a writhing of his spine against those burning points of contact on his nipples. Then, for the next dance steps: your thumbs start rubbing circles on those pretty pinks. At the same, he, as if synchronized, opens his mouth just in time for you to push your tongue into it, rubbing circles against his own tongue in a similar fashion to the way you’re touching him below. And doesn’t this rush the grand finale? Small sounds start filtering off the closed space you’ve created with the cavern of your mouth. A mix of his own choked off moans, smacking noises of your lips each time they withdraw only to come back to him again, slick sounds of your tongues circling each other. The perfect musical score for your magnum opus, because you did this. You have set off these reactions and you have stored this fragile boy’s trust in you, and have seen it come to fruition like this.

It’s all carefully synchronized. You bite his lower lip and pinch the now erect peaks, gentle roughness matching both places and he gasps, pressing his chest more against you, like he craves that tender kind of pain. And, oh, he’s losing himself to you. Now he moves and is the one to initiate a rougher kiss, and you lose yourself to him as well, because you answer back in kind, the kiss now with exhilarating hints of teeth from both parts. But you have plans for him. Of course, he will get nothing but the best from this treatment, this particular type of roughness you can give him that will not have him running for the hills. So you detach your lips from his, though it’s an intermittent thing, because his lips were made to be kissed, and you can’t help yourself with a few more noisy smacks against them, but when you’re finally done, you attach these same lips to his neck, a quick, sharp point of contact when you show the slightest hint of teeth, to which in turn he exhales heavily, and your mouth just keeps going down, on his clavicle, then on a meaty part of his upper pec, and then…!

And then your mouth is on his left nipple, and he shouts, and he tries to keep it down, and then you start sucking and your left hand is fondling his right pectoral, and his hands hold onto the back of your head and you do something with your tongue that has him trembling and moaning outloud this time, and he crosses his legs and isn’t that a sight, he’s fully hard beneath his jeans, and he’s so needy and your right arm surrounds him and your right hand gropes his ass and his hips are pushed forward and he sobs as your own hips meet his and you grunt against his chest and the vibrations are too much for him and your mouth never leaves him as you lick a trail all the way to his right nipple and he blubbers and the heat of his chest feels like home to you and you bite his nipple and—

“Fuck me!”

You withdraw quickly to witness the spectacle: his hands are to the sides of his head against the wall. His almost fully open shirt, all rumpled, the crimson of its color and the pink of his chest a perfect palette. Below, the tent of his erection against the front of his jeans is enhanced by the small wet spot, right where the tip should be. Above, his face turns out to be the real zenith of the play. Mouth open as he draws in breaths, eyebrows pinched, eyes brimming with unshed tears.

‘I surrender’ would be the perfect title for this masterpiece of a performance.

You get close to him again and he rushes to hold onto your shoulders, like he cannot stand to be unmoored for one second. You encircle his waist, and your hands lay on his ass, and it’s a perfect fit. The comedown has to be gentler, this time. You give him a short, soft kiss on his lips that he chases after you’re done.

“So good for me, Bill. Telling me what you want.” The mumbled praise next to his ear has such an effect on him, you still can’t believe he could actually blush more. “Where do you want it?”

He takes a couple of deep breaths, calming himself down before he blows too soon. “Uh… the b-bed, I guess.” He tries to look to the side, embarrassed that he, he of all people could stutter at a time like this, but you don’t let him, left hand on his chin gently forcing him to keep his eyes on you.

“Yeah?” Your hands fondle that firm ass of his, still clothed, but he feels it as though he had nothing on, and he fights to keep his eyes open and on you, stubborn to give into his desire to close them and just feel.

Though it’s a reluctant move —because it is a tragedy, that you can’t multitask— your hands leave their place and set themselves on the few done buttons of his shirt.

He nods, and it almost gives you whiplash, how shy he’s looking right now, as if he didn’t shout out how he wanted you to fuck him some seconds ago.

You start unbuttoning the remaining part of his shirt before he loses his courage, and when you’re done, you hold his gaze intensely for one second as your hands find their way to his belt. He has to look down at what you’re doing because he needs to check that this is real, and because he just can’t with he way you’re looking at him. You keep looking at him even as he can’t decide between looking down or up, even as you undo his belt and his jeans, and then pull the tails of his shirt out of his jeans.

It seems like he braves through it and decides to face you in the end. Your hands stroke a sensual path up his bare chest until they’re underneath the fabric on his shoulders. You slowly push his shirt off him, not leaving his eyes for one second as the shirt falls to the floor. His body is so very perfectly sculpted, and you can’t wait to see more of him. Never leaving his skin, your hands lower down his body in a sensual caress, so low you have to bend over a bit, until your right hand is tracing his left leg, lower and lower. He looks confused for a slight moment until a gentle firmness tells him you want him to flex his leg. He does, and you use the momentum to lay his foot on your own folded leg. You start undoing his shoe.

This is the part where he looks at you like he can’t believe you exist. To be able to just stand there, against the wall, while someone else pauses their foreplay to simply take the time to undress him, or like the undressing is part of the foreplay too, maybe… he doesn’t think he can describe this moment. Not now, not ever. The only thing he knows is that he can’t think this over too much or he’ll start crying for sure this time, even before the sex begins.

Once his shoes are done, you rise and come back to his mouth, your home, and after a soft peck your hands find their way to the front of his pants. You hook two fingers of both hands beneath his underwear right away, and with a long heated look on his behalf, you slowly lower both jeans and underwear down his legs.

It’s so exhilarating when his hard cock springs free. You don’t know who’s the more excited of the two.

You use the excuse of lowering his lower garments to crouch before him, until you get to your prize, and exhale a hot breath right over his hard and leaking cock as you’re lowering them down his knees, and he almost keels over at the feel. Then, as if too stupefied from that simple action, he takes several seconds before remembering to lift his feet so that you can fully take his pants off and away. As you rise up again, you do the same thing, this time a quick brush of your lips against the head of his cock almost his ruin.

He’s on you the moment your faces are close again. You can’t tell whether it is because he truly can’t stand to be far from you for a second or because he’s feeling embarrassed again, but you return the messy kiss until he’s almost out of air. You notice this but he doesn’t stop, somehow. There’s a notable shaking of his hands on the back of your head as you lay your hands on his bare body.

You pull back because you simply have to look at him. He chases after you with a gasp but stops himself at the last moment, and you know he’s mortified, if the strong blush on his face is indicative enough. And now, he’s fully bare for you to feast on. Your eyes trace heated paths across his body, and your hands follow those same paths. He beckons you, just by being himself. He can’t seem to choose between looking at you or at what you’re doing to him, but Billy’s equally pleased with the way you’re touching him and the way you’re looking at him, like you want to commit every single detail to memory.

You can’t help yourself and grope at his pecs once more, the view so much better now that you can see his chest, unhindered. Rough, calloused fingertips play with his nipples and the sides of his torso, and he lays himself onto you, ripe for the taking.

“God, Billy. Your fucking body…” Your left hand rubs down his navel, feeling him squirm at the sensation. Your right hand goes around his body and slowly, painstakingly approaches the lower part of his back.

He almost jumps a foot in the air and moans when your hand is suddenly there, groping the swell of his ass. He can’t look at you. God, he can’t. The way you’re spreading him with one hand is too much for him and he has to hide his face in the crook of your neck as he tries to muffle his moans.

“Sensitive there?” Your right hand traces the inner part of his cheek, and one of his feet kicks against the wall as a reflex. His face is radiating so much heat right now, because you’re so close to touching his hole.

But Billy can’t handle you laying it all on him at once, so he instead withdraws —with such a red face you can’t believe it’s not feverish— and says, “You too. T-Take off your clothes.”

Sweet boy. It truly takes a lot for him to not want the attention on him anymore, and this seems to be it, the way you’re this close to consuming him entirely and the way he would terrifyingly let you. But doesn’t he know that tonight is all about him? He will receive as much attention as he needs to and he will burst at the seams with it. So, instead of taking your time, you quickly start undressing before him as he watches almost in foreboding, understanding that this is about him. But he tries to prolong this, lays his hands on the front of your pants, looking at you with shyness, then, at his own hands, trying to open your button and zipper, but his hands are trembling too much for it.

You chuckle against his lips, receiving a meek sigh in response. “My good boy. Trying to help me.”

It’s the first time you say it loud and clear. He’s your good boy. And your good boy looks faint from it. He’s trying to blubber something out but he can’t seem to form the words, so your mercy comes in the form of a slow, forceful kiss, in which he can’t keep himself quiet. It’s as if the floodgates have been opened with these two simple words. The only reason his moans aren’t that loud is because you’re not giving his mouth a second of respite. Meanwhile, your hands find his, and you finally withdraw from his lips and watch, exhilarated, as he chases after you. It’s becoming tradition now, and it’s probably one of your newest favorite things about Billy.

“It goes like this,” you say, and your fingers guide his in undoing your pants. After it’s done, you hold his gaze as you lead his hands to the sides of you, slowly beginning to push down your lower garments all at once. He bends forward some, similar to what you did with him, but doesn’t go down all the way and seems to lose his courage in the middle of it, because you’re the one who ends up taking off the rest of your own clothes as he pointedly looks at your eyes only, as if he already knew what he was going to encounter and was terrified and thrilled at the same time.

The last of your clothes is now away from you, and you both stare down at each other, with nothing blocking the way.

Your right hand finds its way under his chin. You rub your thumb across and under his lips, and feel his hot, heavy exhale against it.

He blinks quickly in succession. His eyes do this funny thing where they want to look down but end up looking at you and then elsewhere, like he’s embarrassed again and doesn’t know where to look. You think he deserves some encouragement, and lower your mouth to his for a quick peck. Then, your right hand, still holding his chin, starts tilting his head down, slowly enough that he can push you off if he wants to, but he doesn’t want that. No, he does not. As he’s being lead down, his eyes quickly find yours once more in a slight… panic? Excitement?, before he’s facing down and has nothing more to look at but you.

And you can hear and feel his reaction. Because that’s the thing. You’re big, bigger than he was possibly expecting, and a small croak of a moan confirms this same thought he’s currently having. He swallows down and looks you in the eye, from under his lashes, and does he have any idea of what that does to you?

He wants to put his hands on you this time. He doesn’t even know where to start so he settles on your navel. He briefly looks up at you again, but then down, like he’s quickly becoming obsessed with the sight of you. Your hands, in turn, find his hips and lower still. They come to rest right on the sides of his erect, flushed cock, and he does this little jump, and you’re quickly realizing that he’s a lot more sensitive that you initially thought. Hmm…

Billy can’t hide the trembling in his hands anymore, but you’re going to trust him on this, trust that he knows what he’s doing and that he wants it. His nervous hands hover around your cock and it’s like he’s having an internal battle with himself over something, or maybe he truly can’t believe he gets to look at another naked male in a sexual situation and is still getting acclimated to it, so perhaps a little incentive will work.

“Touch all you want, sweetness. It’s all yours.”

He gets this little nervous look on his eye that’s somehow eclipsed by the thrill he’s feeling and showing. So, he obeys. The first contact on your cock is warm, timid, rough from the dryness. Billy has his full attention on your member now. Now, this here is something that would make any man in the world preen: the way Billy’s looking at your cock is comparable to that of someone witnessing a wonder. He’s just holding it, feeling the heavy weight of it on his right hand as his nervous left hand can’t decide if it wants to feel out your testes. You notice this and you gently lead that hand down, showing him he can unequivocally feel to his heart’s desires. The contact on both points feels nice, though clearly insecure on his behalf. And his face. You could’ve never pictured anyone looking at someone else’s sex the way he is. His mouth opens and closes like he can’t find the words, some quiet gasps resounding in the otherwise quiet room.

This leaves you with that same question from before, when he looked ready to weep just from being treated nicely. What is it about this situation that has him so agitated?

“Okay?”, you just have to ask. “Does it feel nice?”

You expect him to snark, but you surprisingly get a somewhat enthusiastic nod in response. Only now you realize that you haven’t touched his cock still, and yet he’s been hard from your foreplay all this time. Well. You obviously have to fix that.

Only that before you can lay a hand on his cock, he shocks you by leaning into you, and then going down, down, down…

“Oh, honey…”

The vision of a bare Billy Hargrove kneeling at your feet is something that’ll haunt your dreams forever, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Of course, you didn’t expect anything from Billy because he doesn’t owe you anything, and this is about him tonight, but if this is what he wants to do then by all means you will make it unforgettable for him, because this is probably his first time giving head to a man, isn’t it?

He’s gaping at the heavy cock in front of him, holding it in both hands, and then at you.

You run the fingers of your right hand through his soft hair. “Need me to guide you?”

He’s doing that thing again, where he’s opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water, can’t decide what he wants to say, and to you this is a clear visage of a boy who needs a nurturing hand.

“S’alright, gorgeous. I’ll tell you what to do. Yeah?”

Billy heaves a heavy breath and nods. So it seems like he’s going non-verbal for the moment. It doesn’t concern you right now, but you’ll keep an eye out in case anything goes wrong. You feel the slightest hint of guilt for thinking he’s so fucking hot like this, not being able to even speak out from lust.

“Open your mouth.” He does. “Pull out your tongue for me, handsome.” He does, too, though slowly, like he’s embarrassed. “Now, just start like this,” and you run your finger across your cock in random strokes, showing him how he’s to lick you, get you wet. “You told me girls sometimes did this to you, yeah? Just do what you’d like to get done on you.”

But, there’s a problem with that. Billy has been with girls before, has had sex with them, but never out of real desire. It has always been a carefully crafted mask for him, the fact that he has to be seen with a girl just to fend off his piece of shit father’s heavy suspicions of him being queer. So, the entirety of his sexual experiences can be summarized into forced orgasm after forced orgasm, doing the most to seem interested enough. So he cannot possibly ‘do what he’d like to get done on himself’ because no situation where a girl was sucking him off could count as genuinely pleasurable for him.

The pause he makes as he’s processing these thoughts and this gentle encouragement of yours tells you all you need to know. “Just start with this pretty pink of yours, yeah?” The tip of your index finger strokes across the expanse of his tongue.

He pulls it back in to swallow, because the way you’re treating him will be his ruin someday, and pulls it back out. There’s a hot blush on his cheeks and the bridge of his nose.

And then, he begins. Nervous, but braving through it, always your boy, he starts with a small kitten lick on the underside of your head. His tongue is like velvet, so hot and alive under you. There’s no words to describe this masterpiece of a vision. He swipes his tongue a little lower, going down to the base and then returning to his first spot. The hot breath he heaves as he pulls his tongue back in to wet it gives you a little thrill. Then, his tongue sweeps all the way up and against the front of your cockhead, and you know he’s now got the taste of your pre-cum, if the short-lived pursing of his lips is any indicator. You know it can’t taste that good, but your boy is full of surprises. After a quick closing of his lips, and a muffled smacking of them, as if he’s savoring the taste and trying to get to a conclusion, he goes back for another taste. And another. He’s holding your gaze, daringly, as he keeps tasting the few drops that keep coming out of you.

Your right hand has a life of its own, finding his soft locks like they’re its home. “Such a good boy for me, Blue.”

Billy always gets a bit more flustered with each time you say that to him. Right now, he’s breathing heavily, only now remembering to use his hands as well. He starts a slow, soft stroke of his hands near the base of your cock while he keeps using his tongue under your head. It’s a nice form of gentle stimulation.

Your finger cards through his curls. “Look at yourself, Billy. Doing so good.” It’s the start of something raunchy, what you’re about to do, but your left hand finds its way to his lips. Your thumb hooks down against the inner part of his cheek and pulls outwards. It’s an obscene image, the beginning of a very obscene expression on him, him with his tongue on a man’s cock, his cheek bulging out.

And yet. The small gasp that resounds in the room does not sound as if he dislikes it.

You end it as quickly as your started it. You get your thumb out and rub it against his lower lip, effectively wetting it. He looks at you with something that looks very much like excitement.

“Try using your lips now, gorgeous.”

He puts his tongue back in his mouth and he swallows and he licks his lips. He briefly looks down in embarrassment and then back at you. He nods. He gets his lips closer to the head of your cock, but he pauses for some seconds here. He pointedly looks at your member now, like he’s gearing up for something. He bites his lower lip. Billy quickly looks up at you and then down again. Then, closes the distance and puts his closed lips to the tip of your cock. The contact is shy, clearly new to him, but what he lacks in experience he makes up for in enthusiasm. Immediately, his lips open, and he starts a gentle suckling on the tip. His eyes are glazed, continuously switching between looking at what he’s doing and looking up at you.

“That’s it…”

Encouraged, he opens his jaw, only to pause for a second and remember to cover his teeth with his lips.

He looks obscene.

“God, Bill, look at you.”

He goes down on you for the first time. The praise on your behalf is taking effect on him: his breathing goes heavier, and he seems to start drooling even though he hasn’t gone so far down yet. His mouth —it’s so open. No doubt his jaw might be sore afterwards— lowers around your cock down to the frenulum, and then lower still.

A small hum from him reverberates on your head. It feels delicious.

“Only what you can, baby. Don’t force yourself.”

His hands on your cock tremble a bit more, but it’s nothing concerning as of right now, because what’s a little bit more of it already? But, you should pay attention to him. As he’s withdrawing and going back down, just a hair’s width further each time, his breathing turns erratic. He quickly looks at you and back down just because he wants to check that’s he’s doing good, that he’s being good, your angel. Even then, that doesn’t seem to compose him at all anymore. The room is filling with the soft sounds of his suckling and his noisy breathing. There’s one or two faint moans in the mix. And that trembling… it’s the subtle shaking of his body this time that tells you something else is up.

Billy starts crying well before he chokes.

“Oh, Billy…”

It’s too late for him to cover it up, but he still tries. Tears are rolling down his cheek first, and then he lowers himself as far as he can, effectively choking this time. He starts a quicker pace, down to that same point that has him gagging every time.

Your hand is soft but firm in his hair as you stop him and pull him off. “You’re hurting yourself.”

Billy doesn’t even look at your eyes after he’s been caught. He uses the back of a hand to wipe at the tears that won’t stop spilling from his eyes, as if you can’t see his pinched eyebrows, the downturn of his lips, the shuddering of his torso drawing in trembling breaths.

The hand you have in his hair goes under his chin. You tilt his head up but he won’t look at you yet. “Talk to me, babe.” Even more tears roll down his cheeks while he shakes his head. “Please?”

This treatment he’s receiving, like he’s a fragile thing not to be messed with, is what does him in. His face turns heartbreaking to look at right now. It’s the grimace a person makes when they’re about to break down.

“It’s so f-fucking— I’m s-so fucking stupid—”

“You’re not.” It’s a commandment, a key principle, something to not be refuted, because it is true. The intensity with which you enunciate it gives him pause and has him staring up at you, vision blurry from the tears. “Tell me what’s wrong?”

The soft caressing under his jaw breaks him a little more. He has to look down for this, otherwise he’ll be a blubbering mess before he even starts speaking. “I… It’s just…” His hands leave your cock for the moment, going to rest on the front of your thighs. “I just— can’t believe I’m finally…”

Oh, baby. “With a man?”

His quick nodding is followed by more tears.

It dawns on you like the biggest epiphany. Of course. He’s never had the chance to be himself, not until he met you and until you could present him with this safe space. This is something so important to him, so much so that he’s been carrying this hurt and this burden his entire life, and now, it all comes out in a steady torrent he can’t seem to shut off.

Everything you want to convey can’t possibly be said in this position, him on his knees in front of your erect cock; this is supposed to be special for him. So, both of your hands go under his jaw and you try to pull him up, to bring him up to his feet and in front of you. But.

He whines. He presses his face to your thigh, adamant about not getting up, like the only way he’ll be able to stay calm is on his knees.

Well. You’re not going to refuse him.

“Baby, look at me.” He does. Billy’s eye peeks from beneath you, and this vision is sure to stay with you for a good while. He hasn’t stopped shedding tears, albeit silently now, and with how fragile he is right now you know it’ll only get more intense starting from now. “You are so brave by telling me this. You were so alone, and now you don’t have to be. And the fact that you chose me of all people?” Your right hand goes to his soft curls and he’s already on his way to weeping again. You lean down until your faces are in front of each other. “I feel so fucking honored.” A kiss on his lips. “I will do everything in my power to make you feel safe at all times.” Another kiss, and he’s blubbering something that vaguely sounds like ‘but you already do!’. You smile at him. “And you’ll always come back to me when anything’s wrong and I’ll make it better, because it’s my duty, because you’re mine, and I’m yours. Okay?”

And everything comes out now. He’s full-on bawling at this point. You kneel down and he throws himself around your shoulders. You’ll hold him for as long as he’ll crying, and he’ll be alright, because he is safe in your arms. Because right now he’s a broken little thing, so beautiful still, the shards from his soul scattered all around, and you are his mender. Your kisses against the side of his head are the liquid gold that will glue the pieces back together.

This is his moment of catharsis.

It’s a surprisingly short-lived affair. After some few thirty seconds, he composes himself enough to gradually stop sobbing. Only trembling breaths reverberating throughout your own body are the indicator that tears are still rolling down, but he’s miles more settled than before.

You caress thoughout the length of his hair. He finally withdraws from the spot in your neck and valiantly tries to look at you. Your hand on his hair goes under his jaw, strokes the chiseled relief. “Better?”

His expression is so soft. You barely remember the last time he looked so calm. “Yeah,” is the hoarse whisper next to your soothing hand.

You lean forward and kiss the few droplets that are still going down. He closes his eyes and sighs, conquered. Turns his head as you’re kissing him and meets your lips, one, two, three times. Gives you the smallest of smiles.

Then he surprises you. His arms untangle from around your shoulders and his hands come to rest on your navel. “C’mon,” he murmurs. “I still want you to— to fuck me.”

Your arms tighten around his waist. “Yeah? You sure?”

Billy gives you a meek little nod.

You both get up. It’s a bit tricky; both of you have been on the hard floor for a while and your legs hurt. You begin to slowly walk the very few steps leading towards the bed, and even that takes a while, since he can’t seem to help himself and stop a few times to kiss you again and again. And it’s not like you’d complain. This is heaven to you.

You reach the foot of your bed. Now, this part is very special, and you have to be able to convey it to him, because he might have settled for the moment, but you suspect that the second you lay him on your bed he might start breaking again a little. So, your arms find their way around his waist. Billy’s arms go around your shoulders once again, like he knows what’s up. And then, slowly, you start tipping him over backwards, feeling a pang of affection with how he’s trusting you with his whole weight, until his back softly hits the bed, so silently the sheets barely rustle.

You settle between his legs.

“Still okay?”

He nods. You lean down, arms still around his waist between him and the mattress, and kiss him long and languidly for good measure. After you separate, there’s a few brief seconds where you just look each other in the eye. He seems to shy away after a while. A couple of tears roll down the sides of his head, and you begin to think it’s something he can’t control, like years of repressed emotions are just leaking out of him absent-mindedly.

You mumble against his lips, quietly, so that you won’t break this bubble: “Okay, gorgeous. Gonna need some lube and a rubber.”

Billy’s gaze turns heated, even as the tears are still rolling out of him. He bites his lower lip and nods.

With the grip on his waist, you push him further up the bed until you’re both comfortably positioned. Your hands fondle the sides of him, up and down his torso, and you feel the tiniest squirm against them. Hm. He’s probably ticklish after all. You give him a small smile and close the distance between your lips. He responds in kind and deepens the kiss. A short groan comes out of his mouth, muffled by your mouth.

While you’ve got him busy, feeling his nervous hands tracing random patterns on your back, you reach out with your right hand until you can open your nightstand’s drawer. Billy hears what you’re doing, but tries not to mind you too much or he’ll lose his nerve, so he keeps on opening his mouth for you, letting you caress his tongue with yours. Without looking, you pull out the objects and close it with the same hand. You lay the tube of lube and the unopened packet on the bed, next to his left hip.

Not wanting to withdraw yet, you start a sensual stroke of your right hand across his torso. His small breakdown just moments earlier have obviously made him flag. Your fingertips press firmly against the juncture of his neck and shoulder, starting a soft massage that leaves him boneless close to you. Then, those same fingers continue their way down his chest. One thing that’ll never stop exciting you is how sensitive his pecs seem to be, so you decide to exploit this fact to the maximum. You grope and rub the meat of his left pectoral in circles. He arches up into you, looking for more of that feel. The thumb of your right hand starts stroking his nipple, and he moans into the kiss. You take advantage of this and bite his lower lip. He shakes against you.

You reluctantly remove yourself from his lips and immediatly attach them to his neck. Without the barrier of your own mouth on his now, he makes small, choked off noises. While he’s distracted, you leave the warm skin of his chest and use that hand to open the lube, pouring some in that same hand single-handedly. You leave it to the side for the moment. Your tongue comes out. It starts tracing a path from the fluttering underneath his jaw and down to the place where your thumb is, and once you’re there, simultaneously, you suck on his pink nipple and enclose his now semi-hard cock with your lubed hand.

The reaction is priceless. He shocks himself with how loud he moans, almost to the point of shouting. He can’t even get on his elbows to watch you as you stimulate him; his arms feel like jelly. Billy can only hold tight against the bedsheet next to the sides of his head. He can’t help but thrust his hips repeatedly against the tunnel of your fingers.

“Needy boy.” He whimpers at that. Your hand moves very slowly up and down his member. “I’ll give you everything you want, and more.”

You move your mouth to his other nipple and do the same, this time with the tiniest, most delicious hint of teeth. He sobs. His cock has gotten fully hard in record time, and is steadily leaking pre-cum now.

“Can you open your legs for me, gorgeous?”

Billy covers his mouth with his right hand, somehow embarrassed at the obscene moan that almost comes out of him. He nods. You remove your hand from his sex, and he whines, even as he watches you lean back to witness him.

The way he flexes his legs, until his feet are against the mattress, and begins parting them, is shy, inexperienced, nervous. It does nothing to quell the pure feel of arousal you get when you finally see the most intimate part of him.

He chews on his fingertips, like he’s so nervous he can’t control his reactions.

“Billy…” You hook your hands under the back of his knees and pull his legs up more, almost bending him in half, wanting to look at him better. He shrieks and rushes to hide his face with his hands. His face is so pink behind them, no doubt. “Fucking perfect. Like you were made for me.” A muffled whine is all you get in response. But, how is he so ashamed of this right now? You are right. He is perfect. And so pink. And tender? And… open… Wait.

Your hands automatically stroke along his thighs until you take hold of his cheeks; he gasps and looks at what you’re doing from between his fingers. Your thumbs open him up.

 “Oh my God,” is all he can whimper.

Huh.

You’re positive you might start drooling any point from now. He totally opened himself up for you before coming here. You’re absolutely sure you could fit two of your fingers in him right away.

In fact. Why not?

Your middle and ring finger start rubbing circles against his asshole. He has such a visceral reaction to this that you’re worried he might break down again. Billy uncovers his face and howls; grabs at both of your wrists, the one near his knee and the one close to his entrance. You watch him just in case he wants to stop, but the way he’s holding onto you lets you know he’s doing just that: holding on for dear life, not calling everything off.

“Good?”

He nods, almost enthusiastically, and you’re again hit with a rush of affection for him.

Slowly, as to not spook him too much, the tip of your middle finger starts pushing against his entrance, not forcefully enough to breach him yet. You were right. You could totally sink two fingers in him easily.

Meanwhile, he has started breathing more frantically, expectant of your next moves.

He looks at you. His pupils are so wide that the gorgeous ocean of his irises almost can’t be seen anymore.

You push your middle and ring finger in him, easily, and it’s like sinking into hot velvet.

The look on his face. God. He exhales a moaning breath and his eyes almost cross. You’re sure he’s started tearing up again. His head leans backwards against the bed. His spine sinfully arches up.

You begin a slow, leisured massage in and out of his entrance, index and pinky fingers to the sides of it. He sounds so breathless. His moans are so obscene already, and you’ve barely even started.

“Feels better when someone else does it, hm?”

You believe he didn’t even register that you’ve said something, if the way he keeps on moaning is indicator enough. Not a problem. The answer is clearly yes. Your thick fingers feel like heaven and hell at the same time in him, stretch him so much more than what he’s worked himself with —two fingers, as well— and send currents of pleasure throughout his body.

Your fingers part, effectively stretching him open further, and he makes a noise that sounds a lot like a purr. You lean forwards to look at his face better; his head was tilted back before, too caught in the throes of pleasure to understand anything else.

Billy catches your eye. He looks like a wreck. There are tear trails going up his forehead and now down the sides of his temples.

“Hey, gorgeous. Having fun?”

Your fingers thrust in and out of him a bit faster, and he covers his mouth with his right hand before nodding.

“It’s so hot that you played with yourself before coming here.”

Billy chokes on a moan. “Wh-What?! No— I—” His face gets so pink and he covers his face with his hands.

You smile fondly at him. He still gets so embarrassed at times. Your left hand leaves his leg and pulls at one of his hands, uncovering his face with not much resistance. “Such a good boy for doing that, Bill. Getting ready for me.”

And, as you say this, your fingers press against that bundle of nerves and that has him screaming so loud he can’t stop himself. He covers his mouth with his right hand, and even then he can’t stop the obscene moans filtering through.

But you don’t stop there. Your fingers focus solely against that place, and you begin a circular massage that has him seeing stars and start sobbing against his own hand. Such a perfect picture he paints for you. His hips are shaking, his feet are kicking against the bed. Billy uses his free hand to hold onto the wrist of the hand that’s making him feel in cloud nine, and he pushes with his hips against it.

“Oh, Billy. So good for me. Let me hear you, baby.” Your left hand grabs at his right wrist and pulls his hand away from his mouth. He complies without problem because he’s so out of it. Your fingertips press hard against his prostate, stroke around it, tap against it in random patterns. He’s trembling like a leaf by this point.

His eyes are clenched. He’s biting his lip so hard you’re afraid he might draw blood. You realize he’s trying to say something.

“F— Fast-ter—”

Your fingers start a quicker rhythm. “Yeah?” They thrust in and out of his hole with force now. He wails. He sobs even harder, well on his way to fully crying, but he doesn’t tell you to stop. His left arm goes around your shoulders to hold on for dear life. “Feels good?”

“Ye— Yeah.”

Your fingers are almost vibrating against him with how fast you’re going. His breathing is mostly composed of moans rather than breaths by this point. “You look so gorgeous like this. So perfect for me.”

Billy presses his tearful, agonic face against the side of yours. “Fuck me. Please! Please.”

“In a moment, gorgeous. I have to stretch you more.” He whines so loudly and prolonged it amuses you. He sounds so pouty about it. “Trust me on this one, okay? I can kind of be… well. A lot.”

He whines a bit more but complies, because it’s true. He’s going to need at least four fingers before you can enter him without causing him pain.

You kiss him languidly, trying to calm him down some before proceeding. As he’s distracted within the kiss, you slip your index finger under —or above, more specifically, since your hand is facing up— your middle and ring finger. It’s a tighter fit now. Your fingers are thick and unforgiving inside him, and his whining turns into a more choked off whimpering.

You withdraw your mouth. “Hurts?”

He shakes his head. You don’t think he’s being untruthful, even as he grimaces, because he’s pushing his hips onto your hand. After some seconds of stillness, you move your fingers in and out of him, slowly at first, but quicken the pace right away. He moans right into your mouth. You’re not kissing him, only sharing the same breath, which to him feels somehow more intimate.

He looks at you pointedly from beneath his tears. “Put another.”

You do, and this time, it’s a bit tricky to ease him into it. The fit is too tight as of right now, and he doesn’t realize he’s clenching down on the three fingers you already have in him. You can’t possibly enter him like this.

“Can you relax for me, baby? Be good for me and unclench?”

Billy exhales so loudly it can be taken for a moan. He bites his lip and tries to do as he’s told. Your last finger slips in, only up to the first joint. But your angel is being so good for you, and he deserves a reward that’ll surely give him a bit more encouragement.

“That’s a good boy.” You lower your face down his body, and before he can ready himself for it, your tongue licks a stripe up his cock.

He yells. His legs quiver next to your head, like he wants to trap your head in them but stops himself at the last moment. You give him too little of this, of this oral stimulation, because you can tell it won’t take too much for him now. Only a few swirls of your tongue around his head have him sobbing desperately, but it lands its intended purpose. His hole is lax around your fingers, and you manage to penetrate him with the entirety of your four fingers now.

You grab the backside of his right leg. You kiss a trail from his groin to his knee. “Perfect. I knew you could do it.” Your fingers thrust in and out quickly now.

Billy’s body is shaking and he’s making the most erotic noises now. He’s so out of it that he doesn’t realize that he’s whimpering, “Thank you. Thank you.”

“Oh, Billy.” Your fingers are ruthless against his entrance. “Such a polite boy, thanking me. I should be thanking you for letting me see you like this. If only you could see yourself right now.”

He’s a blubbering mess. He grabs the wrist of the hand that’s pleasuring him. “Now. Now. Please.”

You get your fingers out of him, slowly, though he still whimpers when you’re finally out. You quickly find the package and tear it open. Billy clings onto your shoulders and presses his tearful face against the junction of your shoulder and neck.

“Baby. It’s okay be nervous,” you start, as you roll on the condom and grab the lube bottle. “I’m here. Nothing bad’s ever gonna happen to you here.” You pour lube on your sheathed cock and stroke yourself a couple of times. Your arms go around his waist, and his legs find their way around your hips, like they’re their designated place by default. “I’ll take care of you. Can I take care of you? Please?”

“Please.” His whine resounds wetly, a tremble present in his voice.

This moment is everything for him. The moment when you push forward, slowly, though even then the head of your cock slips in completely, fluidly, and he looks a little bit like he’s dying, and he’s even quieted down, almost to the point of silence, like he needs to watch this part of his life as though he were witnessing a spectacle.

Billy looks at you, and his mouth does that thing where he can’t seem to get the words out, opening and closing on its own. You push your mouth onto him but don’t kiss him, only let him breath against yours, as if you’re his lifeline, his breathing source.

Your hips push forward a bit more, and all of a sudden you’re bottoming out.

He does this noise now, like that of a dying animal. His face is undescribable. He’s in the biggest agony, and yet he looks like he’s having the silent Rapture. Both emotions are strangely accompanied by complete silence. He can’t begin to process this. One thing that’s for sure is that he needs to be treated delicately for a while now, or he’ll truly break.

You kiss the side of his face. He turns his head, not really seeking your lips but just wanting you to be in his field of vision. “Talk to me, babe? Everything okay?”

He breaths heavily. Erratically. The tears are a steady companion now, will be for a good while. Billy looks at you like he hasn’t processed what you’ve said.

“Babe. Okay?”, you repeat, just in case.

The noise starts coming back. He’s moaning lowly without noticing. He shifts his arms around your shoulders, wanting you even closer to him. God. The light blue of his irises is so intense now, made even more so with how red his eyes have gotten.

He finally nods. Slowly at first, but then turning more frantic, pawing at your back, flexing his legs around your hips, urging you to move.

You chuckle a bit and that almost makes his eyes roll back in his skull. “Tell me how it feels?”

He exhales shakily a few times, like he can’t get enough air in to tell you his answer. “G-Good. So good. So full.”

“Yeah?” You knew he would. Your big cock is stretching him so much, you’re surprised he doesn’t look like he’s in pain. “Doesn’t hurt?”

He shakes his head. That makes this easier.

“Good boy.” He whines against your lips at this. “You were made for me. Taking me in so easily. Look so good split on my cock.”

He’s weeping, but he feels so accomplished now. Fulfilled. So wanted.

Billy closes the short distance and you do, too. The kiss is long and steamy. Half of it is just you giving his lips little bites that he can’t get enough of. A quarter of it is him inviting you into his mouth, licking inside yours and you responding in kind. Through all of it, his moaning gets louder, more whiny, more needy.

You bite his lower lip and drag it backwards, ending a kiss that he chases, again, so predictable and delectable. Sufficiently stimulated, Billy caresses your hips with his legs, whining a bit more. He’s so ready.

Your arms, hooked around his waist, work as an anchor as you begin pulling out of him, almost to the tip, something that has him shaking and whimpering already. Then, you push forward in the same leisured pace until you bottom out again.

His moans get desperate, even though you haven’t done much yet. “Go faster. Faster.”

You give him a steamy kiss and do as you’re told, pulling out and then giving a forceful thrust that has him wailing into your mouth. Then, you do it again. And then you start a steady rhythm that sends a current of pure unadulterated pleasure through his body. It’s not strong enough for him to feel it through his bones, but it still has Billy grasping at your back like you’re his only anchor. The way he’s moaning now leaves you wondering what he’ll sound like when you really start pounding into him. The image concerns you and leaves you breathless at the same time.

Billy’s legs are quivering around your hips already. You’re sure his hands are leaving scratch marks down your back, and the simple thought is delicious. His moans are breathy against your mouth. And the way he clenches around your cock is undescribable. He feels so hot, so tight, even through the condom.

He paints the prettiest picture. His face reflects how much he’s feeling right now, the steady stream of tears down his temples having never stopped. You don’t think you’ll ever see anything more beautiful.

“Is this how you’d thought it would feel?”, you ask, breathless as well, because no one who looks at this masterpiece can remain unmoved.

He shakes his head and tries to quiet his moans. “N-No. This is— ah— s-so much better. Never thought I would— oh— earn this!”

You press him tighter against you within the shield of your arms while you quicken your pace. “You never had to earn this. This —I— was always yours.” You press heavy kisses on his neck while he sobs. “I want to get this through to you.” Your hips slap against his skin, turning this moment into something so sensual and intimate at the same time. “You deserve to be happy.”

Billy begins crying in earnest. It almost makes you slow down before he tightens his legs around your waist, clearly indicating that he wants you to go faster. You comply, anything for your boy, and pound into him so hard that you feel it vibrate around him.

Your arms untangle from his waist and your hands grab at the back of his knees, bending him in half while you keep a fast pace.

“Yes! Yes!”

“I need you to believe it,” you say while you piston in and out of him. “You have to understand how much you mean. Not only to me, but by yourself.”

“Thank you! Thank you s-so mu-uch!” He looks almost overwhelmed with pleasure and emotions. He can barely keep his eyes open.

“You are enough, and more. I love you, Blue. Love you so fucking much.”

That’s Billy’s breaking point. It’s the first time either of you has said it, and he can’t take it. He starts coming untouched, shocked by himself, but pushes on around his pleasure. “L-Love you. I love you. I love you!” He repeats it like a mantra, in a moan, in a sob, defeated by this feel, so intense that he truly breaks down.

This is the strongest orgasm he’s ever had, and he can’t get enough of it. Tries to prolong it, doesn’t want it to ever end, even as he feels almost faint from it, his walls clenching down on you almost painfully.

Before it starts ebbing away, he tries to clamp his legs around you, both still in your grip. “Keep going. Keep going. Please.”

You curse and keep your quick pace. You know he’s finished when he starts moving against you almost erratically, overstimulated, his moans almost screams now. But he doesn’t tell you to stop. “Yeah? You’re gonna let me in you? Let me love you?” Your thrusts turn erratic as well.

“Yes! Yes! Please!” He’s shaking his head, so overwhelmed by the onslaught of your hips, now almost painful with how stimulated he is. His legs quake in your strong grip.

“I’m going to. You’re gonna get so much love, Billy.” You feel a pull at your gut. “So much and even more.”

“Please!”

You grunt next to his ear, and his moans turn airy and high-pitched, barely holding himself together. A few frantic thrusts more, and you’re releasing into the condom, grunting out your pleasure to him. He answers with loud moans, so overwhelmed, almost to the point of blacking out when he feels the warmth of your cum within the condom in him.

He’s still sobbing loudly as you slow down, but there’s a small, dopey smile on his face now.

You pull out and lie next to him, and he immediately attaches himself to you. Billy cries so loudly. He holds you around the shoulders and you hold him close to you, letting him vent all of his remaining emotions to you. But this is the beginning of something new, something different.

Those are happy tears now.

Oops. I didn’t mean for this to get so poetic and long. Lol

Edit: Yes, I changed the header for this work. I hope I’m not being too exaggerated.

[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

Hi! I love your headcanons! Do you have any for Peh-yan and Yasuda? I secretly think they love each other, but won't admit it? Thank you!

Ok spoilers for the ending and 4th character book but yeah they're actually canon! They get married in the end, so they definitely do love each other. Anyway here are my hc's for them!

Yasuda confessed first, but she did it while being annoyed at him for something, just blurted it out.

However Peh was the one who fell for her first. He started seeing her in a different light as they got older and thought she was actually very pretty. Then he realised he didn't mind her telling him off so much. 

Peh still feels guilty about making her cry when they were kids.

The other handcraft club members tried to get them together for years

They go on double dates with Pah and Yumi often

Yasuda was nervous to meet Peh's other friends

One year Yasuda made Peh some chocolates for valentines day, she wanted to gift some to Mitsuya but knew Peh was going to be around that day so she made some for him too (at least that's what she told herself). Peh was actually speechless with this but never forgot about it and returned the favour on white day.

Peh thinks Yasuda's laugh is the best sound he's ever heard

Yasuda tried to coach Peh a bit before she first introduced him to her parents (it didn't go great but everything ended up being ok)

On their first date, Peh tried to put his arm around Yasuda and tried to hold her hand a bunch of times but he always chickened out before actually doing this. Yasuda eventually noticed and was the one to grab his hand first.

They were both blushing like crazy the first time they kissed.

Yasuda still has to chase Peh away from her and Mitsuya while they work sometimes. He's just too distracting and they have deadlines to meet (she promises to spend time with him after)

Yasuda was actually a bit insecure about her crush on Peh, she assumed he wouldn't be interested in her.

They're both ride or die for each other, will get in a dangerous delinquent's face if they dare to hurt or say something bad about the other. 

Yasuda taught Peh to cook and bake

[sailorkamino]

Hi! Could you write some headcannons for tbb x body insecure or plus sized reader?

body insecurities [bad batch]

relationships: gn!reader x bad batch

warnings: weight insecurities, echo has body dysmorphia, diet culture, an older sibling being a parental figure, autistic tech struggling w/ emotions, past body shaming

a/n: i love writing for tech but i struggle with his dialogue, if you're a bad batch writer pls send me some tips to making him sound in character <3

crosshair

• great at reading body language so he can tell when you need comfort even if you don't verbalize it

• he might seem annoyed but that's just his rbf, if he didn't care he wouldn't ask

• the type to be angry when he's worried

• it's eaiser to threaten you then admit he cares

• he'll say stuff like "take a risk like that again and i'll shoot you" or "drink some water dumb ass, i'm not your baby sitter"

• his first reaction is to fight the problem

• "did someone tell you that shit?"

• once he realizes he doesn't need to commit murder he's not leaving you along until you talk

• cross is the best listener and i will die on this hill

• he can seem dismissive of your insecurities but he does care, he just thinks you're wrong lmao

• brutally honest so any praise from him means a lot

echo

• the most empathetic boyfriend part 1

• def has suffered from body dysmorphia so he understands

• but also baffled cuz you're perfect to him

• he's very serious about your mental health so he wants to his a conversation about this

• the most genleman to ever gentleman, he will shower you in love!!

• lots of cuddling and sweet words

• hope you don't have any plans cuz you're not allowed to leave his arms until you feel better

• if you want to eat better that's great! but none of these unhealthy diets you see on the holonet

• no he'll research the best diet/exercise plan for you personally to make sure you're safe <3

• you've helped so much with his confidence he's determined to return the favor

hunter

• instantly knows when something's bothering you

• as the oldest he was forced into a parental role at a young age so he has a lot of expierence with comforting

• will give you a worried dad look until you tell him what's wrong

• he might get a little pushy if you aren't opening up

• he doesn't mean to but worrying about his loved ones is like his default setting

• [protective mode activated] did someone say something? cross will probably help get rid of a body if he asks-

• blames himself for your doubt

• secretly reads/watches romance stories so he'll probably drop some cheesy lines from them

• shows your tummy lots of love, like using it as a pillow while you stroke his hair or sneaking a hand under your top, lulled by your breaths

• cuddles with skin to skin contact are very intimate to hunter cuz of his higtened senses so this is very special privilege

• if it'll give you confidence he offers to work out with you, using the holonet he tries to find 'fun' exercises you can both enjoy (yoga, zumba, etc.)

tech

• he'll get frustrated because he doesn't understand your pov

• he's told you that you're attractive and healthy, why are you still upset?

• hunter has always told him "you can't make others see things the way you do" and it's infuriating for him

• tech is a fixer so he feels helpless when he can't just fix your insecurities

• he'll encourage you to talk to one of his more emotionally intelligent brothers which you take as rejection

• when your eyes fill with tears he panics even more

• "perhaps i should get hunter-" "i don't want your brothers, i want you tech"

• he's quiet for a moment before awkwardly opening his arms, "physical touch causes the brain to release oxytocin, a bonding hormone that strengthens social bonds in mammals. would you like a hug?"

• he's always found you attractive but never voiced it, now he makes sure to tell you every time

• get ready for blunt but 100% genuine compliments like "your chest is distracting in that shirt"

wrecker

• the most empathetic boyfriend part 2

• king of emotional intelligence

• will pick you up and hold you like you're a doll, laughs if you call yourself 'heavy'

• everyone is kind of small to wrecker (even his brothers) so to him you're practically a baby tooka

• but still he takes your feelings seriously

• cadet wrecker was definitely body shamed by regs so he knows how it feels

• showers you with affection 24/7 so it's hard to feel insecure around this guy

• will fight anyone who makes you feel bad >:(

• like hunter, he also offers to work out with you (not just cuz he loves showing off-)

• loves active games, like just dance or wii sports

• is up for any activity has long as you're involved tbh

[mynameisnotsoda]

NOW INTRODUCING.... THE CRITTERS !!!

Technically Corvid is still a part of an au, i really like everyone's designs so i guess its just like a weird little au that are also kinda ocs?? Idk. Im still tagging it as the animatronicfication au and using the other ccs names but im completely separating wilbur from Corvid.

The one that probably changed the most is simp LMAO i just went back to his old design that was inspired by Luna (@starrixle's transfem simpbur turned oc) and Spencer is such a fitting name in my mind i literally can not imagine him with a different name *bwomp*

Also I'm working on refs for the other characters associated with the respective critters! I wanna finish them all and dump them into one post and I'll link it here when I'm done.

ANYWAY INFODUMP TIME

Before we go into individual characters i want to say that this is absolutely Minecraft. Like. The world is built off of Minecraft lore yk !!!! The overworld will still be called the overworld but it's basically just earth, with more magic and humanoid species! Along with supernatural creatures and cryptids n stuff :D also with more advanced tech considering Corvid exists pFF

Spencer for the most part kinda was like he is in canon or whatever. She used to lean more towards incel ideology because she was REALLY insecure and uncomfortable with herself for the longest time. Despite that, Spencer and Adrianne (egirl) started dating when they were 17, his unhealthy obsession with her was only fueled by her unhealthy attachment to him. They needed each other and it wasn't good for either of them. Spencer had developed horrible separation anxiety which only made things worse. Over time Adrianne became suffocated by his constant neediness, overwhelming insecurity, short temper and lack of contribution to household chores. It pained her to leave, but things needed to change. It wasn't until the breakup that Spencer met Shepard, who was his first irl friend in a long time. They met when they were around 22/23, at first Spencer just used Shepard as a distraction from Adrianne, especially since he was surprised that they wanted to even be his friend in the first place. But after a while he genuinely started to enjoy their company, plus they offered him really good advice and helped him through a gender/sexuality crisis. Eventually they became partners! Maybe not romantically, as they're both aromantic, but life partners nonetheless.

OH and i did make Spencer white/Salvadoran. Her mom is the first generation from immigrant parents while her dad is British; And her dad's younger brother is Adam's dad! He's also an ex-christian, he left due to religious trauma and moved to America to escape his family hA

Spencer's also a no sabo kid LMAO (he knows some words/phrases but other than that he cant speak Spanish to save his life)

ALSO ALSO. Oh my god i could talk about Spence all day LMAO but i made him a werewolf !!!! Hes SOO jealous of Adam because she wanted the cat genes but instead got bitten and turned into a werewolf as a teenager. She's done a pretty good job at hiding it from her family so Shepard's the only one who knows.

I already dumped everything about Adam into that other post, so I don't really have much else to add. HOWEVER !! Him and Spence are cousins now :3 Adam doesn't get to meet Spencer in person until he moves to America with Charlie & co, but he does follow her socials with his secret accounts that his parents don't know about. The only reason they know they're cousins is because Spencer's dad told her so and she reached out! Much to the dismay of Adam's parents but they've secretly kept in touch online.

Keith's pretty much stayed the same apart from a slight design revamp. Although I've made him a little older since originally i made him look young. But then I decided hes a dad so i started drawing him older for the asks pFF he also has a hooked nose now! In case it's not obvious. Keith got married to Jean VERY young, they were maybe 17/18 in human years. It was an arranged marriage and their only goal was to have an heir to the throne. Well they did, they had two kids, the eldest being a boy named Lune and the youngest being a girl named Sunny, who's the would be heir. Until Jean took both the kids and left. It was completely unprompted and left everyone in the kingdom confused, especially Keith. Sure, they had a loveless marriage and maybe he was insufferable at times, but he wanted to make it work if not for the kids then for the kingdom! But its been almost a year since she left, he's lost hope in ever finding her. Keith desperately wants his kids back, not because Sunny is the rightful heir— though that is part of it—but he loves them both dearly. He misses them the most.

Wilfred has pretty much stayed the same as well! I did give him a grey tshirt and darker hair to further distance his design from wilbur though. Hes just as unhinged and immoral as he used to be !!!! Nothing has changed aside from appearance actually.

Tobi also pretty much stayed the same except for its now got an orange jumper and lighter brown hair pFF although i do now have a story for him! Tobi was found by Alejandro in a storage auction, he managed to sell a lot of pretty valuable things from there but Tobi stood out, obviously, so he kept it. Alejandro is a travel vlogger and lives in an RV with his friends: Tomas, Philip and Charles. His friends just call him Alex. Anyway, they go from town to town trying local food, visiting tourists traps and vlogging the journey! While doing that they also try to find out how to get Tobi's memories back and possibly turn him human again, if they even can. So far they haven't had much luck but maybe one day...

Corvid was created as the backup singer and lead guitarist of the first all animatronic band! Brought to you by Beloved Entertainment! The other members include lead singer Ranboo Beloved, keytarist Tommy Raccoon, and bassist James Tomcat. Located in Ranboo's Mega Pizzaplex, the only location in the world (so far). Corvid adopts a showman personality while on stage, hes charismatic and such a heartthrob, very popular with the ladies. Off stage he's very calm and soft spoken, he's rather shy but still manages to be a flirt and a tease. Lightly poking fun at his bandmates, coworkers and even guests at times. He's definitely a fan favorite for a reason!

This was so fun to write and i cant wait to share more !!!! Stay tuned !!!!!!

[esperfruit]

TTTE Human AU Character Bonus facts Part 2

Darius Diesel:

Owns a black motorcycle

German + Iranian

BPD

Bisexual disaster 

D10, Arry, Bert and Sonny are the only ones that call him Darius

Has a strong fondness for cute animals, especially ducklings

Currently works on smoking less

Built up an unhealthy tough guy persona over the years, tries to let go of it

Got his scar over his eye in a fight with D10

Does struggle a lot with understanding his own emotions and thus expressing them

Self-conscious about his cackling after Donald made fun of it once  

His parents named him after the Persian king Darius III

Is crazy good at magic tricks ( thank you Full of Surprises)

Fluent in English, German and Persian

His relations to Duck are currently described as “complicated”

Scott “Flying Scotsman” Gresley:

Wanted to be a skateboarder as a teen but his family disapproved 

British

Insomnia

Pansexual

Still holds many regrets for being a very neglectful older brother for so many years

Best social skills out of all Gresleys

Secretly has a drinking problem

Cares about his model engines as if they were his own children

Went missing for a while when he was on a trip to America

Loves PDA, disappointed he can’t show it with Truro in public

Keeps all his influential relatives close to keep an eye on them to avoid more conspiracies 

Likes giving public interviews except when it’s about Gresley family matters

Often played harmless pranks on his younger siblings as a teen

Spencer Gresley:

Has an eye for jewelry and knows what looks good one someone

British

NPD 

Bisexual

Unironically calls himself “Spencer the Grand”

Barely had any freedom as a child because of his controlling parents

He's very insecure and gets easily defensive

Does shady underground businesses 

Caused several assassinations to eliminate competition 

Stole, broke or hid Gordon’s belongings as a child

Incapable of introspection, never sees any flaw in himself

If you offended him once, he will be your biggest hater forever

Will brag about his wealth and fame at any given opportunity 

Loves spoiling his romantic partners with his riches 

Ryan Gresley:

Very fast runner, won multiple competitions and is considered an olympia candidate

British + Moroccan

ADD + dyslexia + dyscalculia

Straight ally

Early bird, goes jogging every day at 5 AM as a warm-up 

Very uncomfortable in growing up in a strict and stuck-up Gresley household

His family only started supporting his running career after he gathered fame for it

Huge fan of sci-fi books even if he can only finish two per year 

An extrovert but also very shy

Sneaks into arcades when he takes a day-off from  training

Is used to receiving a lot of love letters but is too shy to even open them

A bit oblivious to when he’s being teased or when someone is annoyed with him without openly showing it

Often helps Daisy out at taking care of the apartment complex

Sonny Evans:

Has barely any recollection of his childhood, only remembers his time at the smuggling ring

British + Korean

Autism

Gay

Low blood pressure, struggles waking up in the morning

Apologized to Rosie for being so rude to her at the start

Enjoys rides around the island with Diesel on Diesel’s motorcycle

While way more accepted now, many still avoid him

Became friends with Paxton, Sidney, Norman, Den and Dart over time

Has a dry sense of humor and says things very deadpanned, Diesel loves it

Sonny and Diesel secretly investigate the island for traces of D10 

Bad at arguing, usually walks off when frustrated

Subconscious resting intimidating glare

Hiro Kawasaki:

A pacifist, only uses his strength to help others

Japanese

Bisexual + demi + non-binary

Never used a single swear word in his life

Has mastered the ability of making a good first impression

Suffers from frequent homesickness

Despite his missing sense of touch making him feel uneasy, he takes full advantage of it

His determination can easily become stubborn and lead him into endangering himself

Perfectionist and prioritizes getting a job done over his own needs

Great interest in the evolution of global architecture and wants to learn about the current era as possible since he missed out on so much 

Bill and Ben Bagnall:

Constantly try to trick Donald and Douglas and fail miserably every time

British

ADHD (both)

Have been in detention more than every other student

Know every trick in the book on how to cheat on tests

Often do the opposite of what they’re ordered to out of spite

Saved a group of workers from a landslide once and Thomas at a second time and have been bragging about it since then

Bill loves teasing Ben over being the older twin

Get very upset when they are accused of things so bad not even they would do and are very vocal about it

Boris “BoCo” Bagnall:

Got his nickname for his interest in the CoBo diesel engine

British

Neurotypical

Straight ally

Has a very distinct way of saying “do you mind?”

Calls his sons “little bees”

Old friend of Edward since university and stayed in contact even before he moved to Sodor

Gordon sees him as a good friend after he thought BoCo saved his life even if it was just a misunderstanding

[maries-tales]

BROKEN WINGS CHARACTERS

ADAM BELLEMONT:

appearance: brown wavy hair, warm brown eyes, tanned skin, muscular and fairly tall

personality:

qualities: friendly, caring, carefree, outgoing, extroverted, talented, kind hearted

flaws: oblivious, delusional, violent, impulsive, obsessive, overprotective

backstory: Adam is the son of Bellemont's Academy headmaster and founder. His parents were both dancers at the Opera de Paris and he's been brought up for greatness since his youngest years. However with his mother's death, his passion for ballet soon turned into a heavy load on his shoulders due to the pressure his father puts on him. When he meets (Y/n) whose passion bleeds through her every gesture he soon finds himself falling for her and rekindling with his own love for dance.

AARON HOWARD:

appearance: soft blonde hair that's always perfectly in place, dark grey eyes, pale skin, toned and a tad shorter than Adam.

personality:

qualities: caring, perfectionist, determined, ambitious, hard working, secretly kind hearted and thoughtful, honest

flaws: cold, socially awkward, arrogant, overprotective, obsessive, possessive

backstory: Aaron, much like Adam, is the son of two former Opera de Paris dancers and Adam's best friend. The two of them grew up together thanks to their parents' close friendship. He grew up a relatively happy kid, with loving parents and a warm home, but everything came crashing down after his mother's death due to a car crash his father caused whilst being drunk. Since then Aaron's father has been drowning his sorrows and grief in alcohol, leaving Aaron to care for himself. At first he resents (Y/n) for bumping into him on their first day and for nearly everything she does, but he soon falls for her and lets his cold exterior melt away.

JULIAN GREY:

appearance: black hair, chocolate brown eyes, tall and toned, warm ivory skin

personality:

qualities: intelligent, hard working, thoughtful, observant, caring, determined, goal oriented

flaws: stalker, obsessive, manipulative, morally corrupted, possessive

backstory: Julian's the son of a policeman and an attorney. He's been stalking (Y/n) for a year and a half when he found out about her case through his father. His own older sister was a victim of (Y/n)'s abuser and killed herself after not being listened to by the police. Julian originally started stalking (Y/n) to make sure she didn't know the same fate as his sibling, but his intentions soon turned more egotistic.

ESME YOUNG:

appearance: long black hair, fierce blue almond eyes, porcelain skin, fairly petite and delicate

personality:

qualities: determined, caring, ambitious, honest, elegant, goal oriented, soft hearted

flaws: jealous, envious, self conscious, insecure, competitive

backstory: Esme is Aaron and Adam's best friend since kindergarten. She's been in love with Adam for as long as she can remember but have had to endure watching him falling for other people for just as long. She was originally jealous of (Y/n) when Adam fell for her, but she soon comes to worry for her when she sees just how much of a psycho Adam truly is (her words, not mine).

STELLA BRIGHT:

appearance: short pink dyed hair, bright brown eyes, pale skin, short and curvy

personality:

qualities: bubbly, kind hearted, friendly, outgoing, extroverted, party girl, creative and a fashionista

flaws: a bit too honest and impulsive, short attention span and tends to get distracted easily, forgetful

backstory: Stella is Julian's best friend and Julian's and (Y/n)'s flatmate. She's a fashion student and is nothing short of a sweetie who wants to have fun and make friends. She's always been there for Julian but starts to be warry of him as she realises he might not be who she thinks he is.

[gender-machine-broke]

Okay fuck it, some other things about euphoria

1. Being a virgin in high school is considered freakish and something that you need to immediately remedy with some casual sex. As if it’s not actually very common for girls in high school (and college even!) to be virgins. Jules at one point says “bitch you need to catch a dick!” After finding out Kat is still a virgin

2. Jules goes on grindr to meet older men. One of them being Nate Jacobs’ dad. They show the whole sex them between them, which is disturbing and degrading. There’s a whole other thing where Cal Jacobs films all of his sexual encounters (which were exposed to Nate at a young age and deeply screwed him up)

3. There is a 23 year old at a high school party that Maddy is portrayed as pursuing so she can get back at Nate for his many indiscretions. They have sex in the pool. Then when she gets back together with Nate, she tells Nate that this guy raped her when she was blackout drunk. Basically showing her as a manipulative, capricious girl who decided to destroy a man’s life for the sake of a high school relationship

4. Maddy lies to Nate about being a virgin, because her first time was a 40 year old man she met on vacation when she was 14. And “she was the one in control” is a direct quote

5. Kat’s whole character arc revolves around her going from being fat and insecure and not feeling as pretty as her friends, to her being confident and empowered after realizing strangers on the internet “want to fuck her.” Yes, really. There’s a very disturbing scene of a middle aged man who watches her camgirl stuff begging her to degrade him while he masturbates

6. Kat is secretly filmed when she loses her virginity. Which happens because she was alone at a high school party. And some teenage boys she barely knew asked her if she was a prude or a slut and pressured her into sex. All of this is glorified and portrayed as her rise to the top through internet porn

5. Kat’s parents never once question her sudden choice to abandon regular teenage girl clothes in favor of actual BDSM gear, where she got the money for all that, or what she is doing alone in her room all day

[thegayhimbo]

Stranger Things Lucas on the Line Review

If you haven’t yet, be sure to check out my other Stranger Things Reviews. Like, Reblog, and let me know what your thoughts are regarding the show or the upcoming season! :)

Stranger Things Comics/Graphic Novels:

Stranger Things Six

Stranger Things Halloween Special

Stranger Things The Other Side

Stranger Things Zombie Boys

Stranger Things The Bully

Stranger Things Winter Special

Stranger Things Tomb of Ybwen

Stranger Things Into The Fire

Stranger Things Science Camp

Stranger Things “The Game Master” and “Erica’s Quest”

Stranger Things and Dungeons and Dragons

Stranger Things Kamchatka

Stranger Things Erica The Great

Stranger Things “Creature Feature” and “Summer Special”

Stranger Things Tie-In Books:

Stranger Things Suspicious Minds

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 1 of 3)

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 2 of 3)

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 3 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 1 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 2 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 3 of 3)

Stranger Things Rebel Robin Book and Podcast (Part 1 of 2)

Stranger Things Rebel Robin Book and Podcast (Part 2 of 2)

Stranger Things Hawkins Horrors Review

Stranger Things Flight Of Icarus

Stranger Things Episode Reviews:

The Vanishing of Will Byers (Part 1 of 2)

The Vanishing of Will Byers (Part 2 of 2)

Synopsis: Set between the events of seasons 3 and 4, the book follows Lucas during his freshman year of high school as he attempts to chart a different course for his life, taking up basketball as a means of trying new things and getting out of his comfort zone. However, Lucas soon realizes this won't be as easy as he initially thinks: His attempts to blend in with the popular crowd put him at odds with Mike and Dustin, his relationship with Max is deteriorating, and Lucas is forced to face hard truths about how insidiously racism is woven into Hawkins and what it means to be one of the few black kids in a mostly white town......

Observations:

Lucas on the Line acts as a conclusion to what I call "The Outcasts Trilogy," which began with Rebel Robin, followed by Flight of Icarus, and ending with this book. All these Tie-In novels center around three characters (Robin, Eddie, Lucas) who are considered outcasts in Hawkins: Robin is secretly a lesbian in a homophobic culture, Eddie is the town freak due to his interest in D&D, guitar, his low socioeconomic status, and his family's reputation because of his dad's criminal past, and Lucas is a black kid in a society where racism and prejudice are still prevalent. All 3 characters deal with feeling inadequate and unwanted, and attempt to cope with their situations by either blending into the crowd, or else attempting to escape Hawkins. All 3 of them eventually face hard truths and learn to stop denying the aspects of themselves that make them unique.

In Lucas's case, now that he's older and in high school, not only is he beginning to realize the implications of what it means to be black in a neighborhood where racism still lurks, but he's also beginning to understand his family's history, as well as coming to terms with an uncomfortable truth: As much as his friends care about him, they will never truly understand the bigotry and micro-aggressions Lucas is forced to endure as a person of color.

The show has touched on themes of bigotry and racism before, both in Lucas's interracial relationship with Max (which makes him a target for Billy) and the type of bullying he experienced from Troy and James. However, this book expands on those themes by going more into Lucas's fears and insecurities at being discriminated against for being a nerd AND being black, as well as finding someone who understands what he's going through. It also, IMO, deconstructs the "token minority" trope by showing what it's like to be considered that in a group of white friends from the perspective of said minority character, and how dehumanizing it feels.

This book left a lot to ponder. It's not perfect, and there are some flaws in its structure (mostly relating to continuity errors and missed opportunities), but it does inspire discussion, and gives a solid point-of-view to Lucas's character.

Part 1: Lucas's Journey

For as much as this fandom talks about Steve's character development (not that the discussion is unwarranted), Lucas is also another character (next to his sister Erica) who's had subtle but notable growth over the course of the show.

Season 1 had Lucas start out as a loyal member of the Party who was invested in finding Will, but also at odds with Mike and Dustin over El due to his distrust of her (something which got him a lot of flak from fans at the time). All of this came to a head in the junkyard when Lucas realized El was deliberately misleading them so they wouldn't find the Gate, leading to an ugly fight within the group. However, once things settled down, and Lucas realized El's misdirection was her attempting to keep them safe and not an act of maliciousness, he apologized for how he acted (with El also apologizing for lying) and welcomed her into the group, formally accepting her as a friend and member of the Party. Notably, in spite of his misgivings, he never betrayed El to the authorities, demonstrating that his heart was in the right place.

Season 2 continued on with this development. Contrast Lucas's acceptance of Max into the Party and his willingness to reach out to her vs how he initially acted with El in S1. It's notable since, at the time, Mike was hostile towards the idea of Max becoming part of the group. While Lucas had a crush on Max (which is normal for a boy his age), what separated him from the others was his willingness to listen to Max, who had always felt unheard in her house. That conversation on the bus rooftop in S2, where she opens up to Lucas about her home life and how she fears she's becoming like Billy, was meaningful to both of them, not just in Lucas reassuring Max she was a good person, but also Lucas really seeing Max for who she was and loving her for it. And in spite of the threat Billy posed, Lucas refused to be scared off by him (even kneeing Billy in the groin when he pinned him to the wall), and that willingness for Lucas to fight for Max was one of the many reasons Max finally stood up to Billy and made it clear to him that she was done with his abuse.

Season 3 showed Lucas was still navigating his relationship with Max (after getting dumped 5 times), as well as doing his best to advise Mike about his relationship with El. He also got some cool moments, from saving El from the Meat Flayer by chopping off its tendril, to gathering the fireworks to use against the Meat Flayer at the Battle of Starcourt. In spite of this, I remember at the time some fans (including me) wished Lucas had a bigger role in the story. The Duffer Brothers must have heard those criticisms because Lucas ended up getting his own arc in the next season.

There were a lot of great moments in season 4, but Lucas's story was a favorite for me because of how relatable it was. He was in high school trying for a fresh start. He still participated in D&D (Hellfire Club) but also joining basketball because he wanted to break out from being the nerd who was picked on all the time, and because he enjoyed the sport and wanted to give it a shot. He was discovering his identity, which is a big part of the high school experience. Adding onto this, a part of him wanted to achieve popularity as a way of being recognized instead of constantly looked down upon. He got what he wanted when he won the basketball championship............and then experienced firsthand the darker side of popularity, which forced Lucas to ask himself if this is what he really wanted.

Lucas on the Line expands more on the S4 arc by showing the events that led to Lucas doing basketball, and how that put him at odds with Mike and Dustin for a while. We also get to see the circumstances behind his breakup with Max, as well as her spiral into depression following Billy's death.

Something I appreciate is the book doesn't shy away from the trauma and PTSD Lucas is dealing with. The show usually gives that focus to characters like El, Max, Will, Joyce, Hopper, and Nancy, so it's refreshing to see how Lucas has processed everything since Will's disappearance in 1983. The answer is not well. It's even gotten worse since the Battle of Starcourt:

Similar to the way Robin in her novel talks about Hawkins High as a metaphorical monster, there are multiple instances where Lucas makes comparisons between his living situation in Hawkins and the Upside Down:

Granted, this is a metaphor that anyone who's watched the show enough times can pick up on: For as much as Hawkins presents itself as an idyllic neighborhood, there is rot within it, and NOT just from the Upside Down. The town has deeply rooted bigotry entrenched in its structure that takes on many forms (racism, homophobia, bullying, fear-mongering, forced conformity, etc) which the characters are forced to endure on a daily basis. From a symbolic standpoint, the Upside Down is all the nastiness within Hawkins that's covered up with a pretty surface. It may be a town that presents itself as perfect, but the moment you actually take a closer look at your surroundings, you realize that "perfectness" isn't genuine, and that people who present themselves as friendly can reveal just how awful they are in the right circumstances.

I live in a neighborhood like this, and I've been forced to learn time and again that some people in my town (though not all of them) have deeply rooted prejudices and will normalize being cruel because they can get away with it, all the while justifying their behavior as normal. Becoming cynical and cautious is how I've survived it. It reminds me of how Max thinks about her abusive situation with Billy: If you keep the monsters close to you, you're never caught by surprise.

Getting back to Lucas, he's painfully aware of this. Part of his PTSD and trauma isn't just from encountering the horrors of the Upside Down, but also from all the years he was bullied in school:

Lucas explains this to Mike and Dustin on the show, but part of his reasons for joining the basketball team is because he thinks it'll get him in with the popular crowd, and people will stop harassing him. What he doesn't understand (and what Mike and Dustin pick up on pretty quickly) is that even if Lucas changed everything about himself to fit in, he will always be walking on eggshells with that group. If he does everything right, he'll be tenuously accepted, but if he gets one thing wrong, or makes the team look bad in any way (even unintentionally), they will rip him to shreds. I even question what would've happened if Lucas failed to make the winning shot at the championship game: Would the team and the crowd have been as accepting of Lucas for that, or would he have been ostracized on the spot?

I know there are people in this fandom who vilify Mike and Dustin for going to Hellfire Club over Lucas's basketball games. As time has passed, I maintain they made the right call. Not only were they bullied by the basketball jocks way before they joined Hellfire Club (with Jason doing nothing to stop it), but they could see Lucas was deluding himself, and that these were not the kind of people they wanted to be friends with. At least with Eddie, they were accepted for who they were without having to make major changes to their identities to fit in. Even with Lucas, Eddie still welcomed him into the Hellfire Club despite his initial reluctance and the fact Lucas was on the basketball team. He didn't care that Lucas was black (which was a problem for several white basketball jocks like Lee Garroway) or that Lucas had extracurricular activities outside of Hellfire. He just cared that Lucas wanted to be there and was willing to invest in their D&D Campaign.

(SIDE NOTE: This is a big reason I roll my eyes hard at Billy stans who whine about Eddie being a similar replacement for Billy. The major differences between Eddie and Billy is a.) Eddie wasn't a bully, b.) Eddie didn't care about becoming Kings of Hawkins High like Billy did, and c.) Eddie could afford to be in the same room with Lucas for more than 30 seconds without being racist towards him or wanting to attack him. Enough said.)

And it should be noted that while Mike and Dustin are skeptical about Lucas doing basketball, they eventually accept it and even show up to one of his basketball practices (along with Erica) where Lucas does his best and still gets shit from his teammates for how he played.

Both Mike and Dustin saw how Lucas was being treated, as well as the fact Lucas was benched up until the championship, and they rightfully concluded that even if Lucas became popular, a.) It wouldn't change how THEY were being treated (no matter what Lucas told them), and b.) Lucas would forever be trying to live up to expectations from others until he became a shell of his former self. It's a lot like what Chrissy Cunningham went through where she maintained the perfect popular image as the Queen Bee of Hawkins High at the cost of her mental health and well being.

To Lucas's credit, he eventually realizes this at the end. As angry as he was at Dustin and Mike for skipping the Championship, he came to understand why they made that decision. When the time came between choosing Jason and the basketball team vs his friends, he chose his friends:

Caleb McLaughlin even noted this in an interview post S4: Lucas wanted to find acceptance, but the problem is you can't force other people to accept you. Mike and Dustin, in spite of their flaws, accepted Lucas for who he was. Jason and the other basketball players (with the exception of Jay) only accepted Lucas when he either made the team look good, or when they wanted something from him.

This doesn't necessarily mean the book (or even the show) paints Lucas wanting to do basketball as a wrong thing. It was a choice like everything else. Lucas's reasons for wanting to do basketball went beyond just wanting to be popular: He wanted to try something new. He wanted something he was passionate about. Not only did he find that, but he also got to share it with another teammate who understood him: Jermaine "Jay" Demario.

Part 2: Lucas's Relationships with other characters

Jay is a new character from the book who's not only one of the few black kids in Hawkins, but also one of the only basketball players who treats Lucas decently and takes him under his wing. He's the one who encourages Lucas to step out of his comfort zone and try out basketball. He's also one of the few jocks (though he doesn't consider himself a jock in the traditional sense) who's a decent person, and Lucas looks up to him as a mentor the same way Dustin does with Steve. Jay gives Lucas useful advice about balancing his extracurricular activities with other aspects of his life, and he's the one who trains Lucas to do well at basketball, from practicing after school with him, to having Lucas check out videos of NBA playoffs and finals to improve his skills. He also accepts Lucas wanting to do Hellfire Club, and tells him there's nothing wrong with being both a jock and a nerd.

Speaking as someone who made Varsity for cross-country and track & field AND took AP classes during high school, I can relate to that last bit! 🙂

Jay was a cool character, and I'm sad he wasn't in the show. It's nice Lucas was able to have a friend, however briefly, whom he could confide in, and who understood the issues Lucas dealt with because of who he was and where he lived (more on that in a minute).

Erica's relationship with Lucas also gets a bit more time here. She's still snarky towards Lucas, but there are moments demonstrating she cares for him. For instance, despite initially criticizing how Lucas played during a practice, she is pissed when Lee and some other basketball players call Lucas a racist slur:

Later on, after Lucas becomes the target of a bomb threat, there's a quiet scene where Erica comes in to hang out with Lucas. Even though she doesn't verbally say it, it's clear from her demeanor she's genuinely worried for Lucas's safety:

She may exchange barbs with him, but she knows where to draw the line. The fact she also showed up for all of Lucas's basketball games on her own accord (minus the championship) despite Lucas being benched conveys she supports her brother in her own way. I liked the evolution of Lucas and Erica's relationship in S4, and I'm hoping that continues into S5. If the final scenes of S4 are any indication of foreshadowing, they'll likely be working together, so we'll probably get to see more of their sibling dynamic.

Max's relationship with Lucas also gets focus. For the most part, they are not in a good place. Ever since Billy's death at Starcourt Mall, Max has fallen into a deep depression and become withdrawn from everyone, including Lucas. A good chunk of the story is Lucas trying to reach out to Max and make it clear to Max that he's there for her. The problem is he doesn't know how since Max keeps rejecting any attempts to hang out with him, or for him to help her. The dynamic is sadly realistic for anyone who's had friends or family who suffer from chronic depression and feel frustrated or helpless when they try to help that person recover. Lucas does everything he can for Max in the book, from giving her the space she needs, to offering to listen to her. We also get to see Lucas's perspective on why he cares so much for Max (just like Max's novel showed us why she was attracted to Lucas):

What's sad is Max does understand what Lucas is trying to do. She knows he cares about her. At the same time though, she can't pretend things are normal anymore, or that she doesn't feel immense guilt over how she wished something horrible would happen to Billy and got her wish granted (as she admits to Vecna in the S4 finale), or that her life hasn't changed for the worse:

BTW, the breakup between Max and Lucas that's alluded to in S4 happens in the book. It's during Thanksgiving when Lucas sneaks out of his house to give Max some Thanksgiving dinner while she's at the skating park. It's also the first time Lucas hears Max play "Running Up That Hill" by Kate Bush and truly understands the meaning of that song........and what it means for their relationship:

What's admirable about Lucas is that, in spite of what's going on with Max and her attempts to distance herself from him, he still keeps fighting for her any way he can, right up to the end of the book when Vecna tries to kill Max the first time in the graveyard. And it pays off. Those memories she has of her time with Lucas, combined with the moments she shared with her friends, allow her to break free from Vecna, to remember she has something to live for, that she has people who care about her, and that she doesn't have to be consumed by guilt over what happened to Billy.

Speaking of Billy, the few times Lucas brings him up, he does NOT talk about Billy in a positive light. If there was any doubt about whether Lucas hated Billy, this book puts that to rest. One passage in particular stuck out:

I know Lucas is projecting his anger towards Billy in this moment (not that I blame him), but the idea that Vecna/The Mind Flayer was drawn to Billy because of the darkness in his heart is an interesting idea. We know Vecna initially spared El at Hawkins Lab while killing the other kids because he saw a lot of himself in El (both with her struggles developing her powers, and her treatment under Brenner and her "brothers/sisters") and believed El would be grateful to him for "saving her." It's also implied on the show (and by Vecna's actor, Jamie Campbell Bower) that Vecna feels the same way about Will, which is why he has a creepy interest in him. Billy in many ways resembles Vecna in his rage and sadistic desire to hurt everything and everyone around him, and that aspect may have attracted Vecna to Billy. Granted, it's hard to know if that's the case since Billy was initially driving that night to hook up with Karen before crashing by the warehouse where that piece of the Mind Flayer was nesting, but it's also possible Vecna could have sensed Billy before then, and thought he'd make a great candidate to put his plan into motion.

Then there's Lucas's relationship with Jason: Lucas picks up pretty quickly that something's off about Jason, particularly when he's preparing for the prep-rally speech by slamming his hands in the lockers hard enough to leave dents. Lucas also isn't impressed with Jason's speech, and rightfully notes that Jason invokes the Starcourt tragedy for "cheap audience reactions" (which is why Max looks hurt in the scene when Jason brings up Billy). There's also a scene after Jason's confrontation with Eddie in the cafeteria where he and Andy make disparaging remarks about people who live in trailer parks. When Lucas speaks out against that (because Max was forced to move into a trailer park after Neil left Susan), Jason loses his shit:

By the time of Chrissy's death when Jason's organized the basketball team into hunting down Eddie and tortures Gareth for information, Lucas finally understands just how unhinged Jason is, and even compares Jason to Billy:

I know some people defend Jason on the grounds that Chrissy's death impacted him in a negative way, and that Patrick's later death made things worse because it happened under circumstances that couldn't be explained, which is why Jason jumped on the "Hellfire Club is a Satanic cult" bandwagon. While there is some truth to this, it ignores how Jason already had negative qualities brewing underneath, and that Chrissy's death didn't create these issues, but instead brought them to the surface in the worst way possible. Jason already had inherent prejudices against D&D and anyone he deemed as a "freak" (as depicted in the Flight of Icarus book) and the show established that he had a very self-absorbed, hot-headed, entitled attitude even before things got bad. Maybe he was initially able to keep these negative qualities under control, but they didn't magically manifest out of thin air just because Chrissy died.

Regardless of whether we chose to admit it, we all have a dark side. We all have aspects of our personality we're not proud of. Jason is no different in that regard. The problem is the lack of self-awareness on his part about those flaws, combined with his self-righteous belief that he was doing the right thing even though his actions put innocent people in danger.

I could sympathize with Jason over the deaths of Chrissy and Patrick, but my sympathy ended when he organized a Witch Hunt against the Hellfire Club (who had NOTHING to do with Chrissy and Patrick's deaths) and not-so-subtly threatened Nancy at the gun store and made it clear he intended to go after Mike. At that point, I was done with him. Judging by the final conversation between Lucas and Jason, where Jason refuses to hear Lucas's explanations about what's going on because it doesn't fit with his preconceived notions, Lucas was done with him as well:

Jason: "I never should have let you in the door."

Lucas (coldly): "And I never should have knocked. I thought I wanted to be like you. Popular. Normal. But it turns out normal's just a raging psychopath."

Truer words have never been spoken.

Part 3: Lucas's Experiences with Racism and Bigotry

Lucas has been made the target of racism by characters like Troy, James, and Billy on the show, but this book is where Lucas begins to understand the full ramifications of what it means to be black in a world where racism is ingrained into society. We also get to see how it psychologically impacts Lucas and feeds into his worst insecurities.

Take Lucas's introduction to the basketball team for instance: For the most part, his tryout is average (not awful, but not spectacular), but Jason still allows him on the team for one particular reason:

There's always been a question in the fandom about whether Jason was racist in the same way Billy was. I know Caleb doesn't think so, and argued Billy was worse (and given the the amount of mental gymnastics certain fans have done to pretend Billy wasn't racist, as well as Caleb's experiences with racism in the fandom, I get where his position is coming from), but this book suggests otherwise. Jason may not have been as overtly racist as Billy was, but there is a soft bigotry at play here in Jason allowing Lucas on the team BECAUSE he was black as opposed to Lucas's actual skills. Some people will probably argue against Jason being racist because of his friendship with Patrick, but that's basically the "I can't be racist because I have a black friend" argument.

What's depressing is this haunts Lucas for the remainder of the book. In spite of how hard he practices to get better, he can't shake off the idea that he was only let on the team because of his skin color (and because of the stereotypical idea that all black people do basketball), and not because he earned it. This is reinforced by other members of the basketball team, led by Lee Garroway, who not-so-subtly takes every opportunity to remind Lucas of this:

Speaking of which, this book introduces another bully in the form of Lee Garroway, and he's a loathsome piece of work. Like Billy, he is outwardly racist towards Lucas, but he takes it a step further in targeting both Lucas and Jay because he, along with several other members of the team, are pissed that they made it to the subs roster (thinking Lucas and Jay only got that position because they're both black) and could potentially make Varsity, which is a position they all want. This all culminates in Lee rigging both Jay and Lucas's lockers to spray them with glitter, and then later rigs Lucas's locker again with a bomb that almost kills a janitor working at the school. Lucas manages to catch Lee in the act by planting a camera in his locker after the first attack, and even though the footage gets Lee's friends expelled, Lee is still let off the hook because his father is a donor to the school and bribes Mr. Higgins into covering it up. It's similar to what happened in Flight of Icarus when Eddie accuses Mr. Higgins of looking the other way when it came to athletic players like Tommy and Jason who bully other students and are allowed to get away with it because their fathers have the principal in their pockets.

Remember that profoundly stupid comment from the Angela apologist I talked about in my review of Darkness on the Edge of Town?

This is why that comment struck a nerve: Putting aside how this take is completely devoid of critical thought, it misses the fact that the reason bullies like Angela, Jason, Tommy, and Lee feel justified in their behavior is BECAUSE most of the adults enable them. At best, they do the bare minimum in disciplining these teens, and at worst, they look the other way and punish people like El and Eddie who try to stand up for themselves and others.

And I'm sorry, but the "They are children, none of them are responsible for what they do" excuse can take a flying leap into a volcano for all I care. If you deliberately make a bomb that you know will put someone in the hospital (or even get them killed), you are responsible for your behavior. This isn't like Lee was incapable of understanding what he was doing was wrong. To imply otherwise is stupid beyond belief. 🙄

What's infuriating is not only does Lee barely get a slap on the wrist for what he did, but the bomb threat was enough to cause Jay and his family to move, meaning Lucas lost one of the few friends he could depend on.

On top of that, this isn't even unique to Jay's situation. Both of Lucas's parents also have history which involved moving around to find a place where they could, at the very least, be tolerated in their community. All the while, they knew on some level they'd never truly be accepted:

Lucas's parents did the best they could in trying to protect Lucas and Erica and raise them so they wouldn't have to go through the same circumstances they did. The problem though is that racism has become normalized to such an extent that there isn't a way to escape it.

On a related note, this is why I find the current attempts by Conservatives to stop Critical Race Theory from being taught in schools to be vile: These people want to pretend racism is a thing of the past, like it isn't still impacting people of color in the United States to this day, and are perfectly okay trying to whitewash history and limit any attempts at discussion to achieve that goal. It's been an ongoing issue where I live (to the point that last year, three new members were elected to the school district so they could push their agendas and prevent CRT and other "undesired talking points" in schools), and I know it's been an ongoing issue elsewhere in the United States (*cough* Florida *cough*). John Oliver did a brilliant breakdown of this last year, and I highly recommend watching it:

Just like with many of the other books in this series (Darkness on the Edge of Town, Rebel Robin, Flight of Icarus, etc) Lucas on the Line illustrates that many of the social issues these characters experienced in the 80s continue to be a problem today. Very little has changed, and while people might be more willing to hide their bigotry, or pretend it's something else, that doesn't mean it's gone.

Part 4: Missed Opportunities and Continuity Errors

Like I said before, this book isn't perfect, and has its flaws. I can't speak for what notes Suyi Davies, the author of the book, got from the Duffer Brothers and Netflix, but there were some major contradictions that were hard to ignore.

For instance, there's a flashback where Lucas is supposed to be in third grade and first experiences discrimination against him when the other kids are afraid of swimming with him because they think his "blackness" will rub off on them. While the flashback is effective in showing the insidiousness of how kids can be bigoted at a young age, it's undermined by the date this flashback is supposed to take place in: June 6, 1981. At this point, Lucas would have finished fourth grade, not third grade. On top of that, it's mentioned that Lucas wasn't friends with Mike, Will, and Dustin yet, but that's not only contradicted by other tie-in materials, but also by Dustin's claim on the show that he didn't join the Party until he was in 4th grade, which would have been around 1980. For Lucas to be in third grade in 1981 and not know any of his friends at this point makes no sense.

Then there's the third act of the book, which takes place within the first four episodes of S4: The show establishes the events in those episodes takes place between March 21st-24th, 1986. However, the book changes this so it takes place between April 4th-7th, 1986. The reasons for this are unclear, especially since this book came out AFTER S4 premiered, but I suspect it may have something to do with "Birtdaygate" (i.e. the Duffer Brothers forgetting Will's Birthday was supposed to be on March 22nd). I can't tell if Netflix was trying to retcon the dates because they were embarrassed by "Birthdaygate," or if S4 was originally supposed to be set in April before they changed it to March at the last minute (which begs the question of why they did that), but it is something that's been on my mind for a while now.

Moving past these errors, I was disappointed the book didn't expand more on Patrick's character despite having the opportunity to do so. In the show, Patrick demonstrates a friendlier side to Lucas during their time together, and I know it was speculated at the time that there was more to his interactions with Lucas. However the book doesn't explore that angle, and we don't get a lot of information about Patrick. It's frustrating because, out of all of Vecna's victims, Patrick is the only one that doesn't get his backstory fully fleshed out. We see why and how Chrissy, Fred, and Max were targeted, but it's only implied in Patrick's case. Lucas speculates Patrick had an abusive father, but neither the book nor the show elaborate on this, which makes Patrick come off as a wasted character, especially when his death could have had a bigger impact on Lucas.

Finally, this is just a minor nitpick, but I was unhappy that the book didn't seize on the opportunity of Lucas and Steve playing at least one game of basketball. There's a scene in the book when Steve offers to go one-on-one with Lucas, and Lucas turns him down:

For the story's sake, I get why they had Jay be the one to practice with Lucas as opposed to Steve, but it still feels like a missed opportunity, especially when it was implied on the show that Lucas and Steve's had a better relationship after S2 following Steve protecting them from the demodogs.

Final Thoughts:

Overall, I would recommend this book. It's interesting seeing things from Lucas's perspective, as well as how he views his relationship with others, and how he copes with his trauma. The book does a stellar job exploring how the racism inherent in Hawkins has impacted Lucas's life and well-being, and it's also a relatable journey of finding your identity and rising above the stereotypes people place around you and your community.

As for where Lucas goes from here, I'm wagering that he'll have a role in bringing Max back from the coma Vecna's placed her in, and that they'll finally get that date night at the theaters.

[yuripira4e]

i already posted this in some tags but I want to be more insane acryally. This is kind of just my opinion on Edwin and The Cat Kings relationship n why I don’t think fans should try and push their relationship.

Their relationship is starts off and is mostly the cat kings own narcissism and predatory (not age wise; I mean literally) behavior towards Edwin and Edwin's need for someone to push him into understanding that his queerness doesn't have to be torture and can be something giddy (even if he doesn't return those feelings). This is super important to Edwin but his rejection of TCK is also as he immediately recognizes his lack of feelings and actual literal discomfort at the moves placed on him. TCK is good about boundaries and consent sexually wise but that doesn’t stop their relationship from progressing from there.

At first, the cat king does like Edwin but he doesn’t know anything about him. He sees their relationship as a game and Edwin simply as someone he wants to have simply because he can’t. He continues to torment Edwin (showing up as people he does like, propositioning him still, being threatening when his control is questioned) through out the show but starts to feel that “romanticism” towards him because hes infatuated by the kindness he's shown despite the cruelty he's presented to Edwin. Queerness and performance always go hand in hand and Edwin’s lack of it entices the Cat King.

The show runners and Lukas, the actor, have said themselves that the cat king is an older secretly insecure character. He’s jaded by heartbreak the the world’s condemnation of everything he is. Edwin is this younger, genuinely kind character that shows him that projecting his hurt on others and romanticizing it only hurts both people in that relationship. Their relationship is about the isolation of queerness and the walls put up to protect yourself and the coping mechanism used to not be hurt again; even at the risk of hurting those just like you- or those who used to be (cough cough the show runners saying that TCK represented the older men with bad intentions that every young gay man has met that welcomes them into the space and makes them feel loved to use them). The Cat King uses Edwin and Edwin knows this. That kiss from edwin was not a reciprocation of feelings; it was to say "I'm sorry your loneliness had caused you to think you have to use your power to control those weaker than you. (Naive, young, and someone he can literally trap) It's the easiest way to feel. And while I cannot and will not give you what you want or need, you deserve to feel happy and not like you have to gain attention of those uninterested to feel good enough.”

I just can't even explain all my thoughts about their dynamic it's just so much about the predation from older queers because of the trauma they've endured from their elders and the cycle of hurt and abuse that is passed down and the way we can break the cycle with kindness. The way we can protect our youths by healing those traumas.

Something the cat king learns and accepts because he can like Edwin. He can show Edwin the sweetness and beauty of being queer while also not being the one that should hold his hand through it. Edwin cannot be a romanticized replacement for the pain others have caused him and trying to force him to be so, continuing to treat him like prey to catch, will only continue the cycle.

tdlr: their relationship is super important for both of their relationships with queerness and trauma and becoming more aware of their identities but their relationship is not romantic- it’s simply an attempt to romanticize Edwin into someone he could love (hurt and control) in place of the people who’s actually hurt him and is supposed to be a parallel of real life predation in the queer community but the realization of this created an amazing acceptance and new bond I do hope they explore without TCK trying to force a non-platonic relationship

Off topic but I don't like people defending their age gap because, yes, Edwin is 86, but he died with a teenage boy brain and then spent 70 of those years in hell where he certainly was not getting his brain developed while TCK has possibly hundreds of years of sentience and experience. The power imbalance is not it y'all and that’s like super clear in the show

[cosmical-flowers]

Sakura Nakamura (my s/i) lore 🎉🎉🎉

Early life / Elementary School:

- Parents are Actors / Models, very busy life and both are emotionally absent. Aunt stepped in as a role model

- As she continued elementary school, she ended up being a child actor for commercials and a model too

- Many people thought she was cool at first, but when they realized she was really into magical girl shows they thought she was weird. Not many friends because of this, yet still shares about it.

- Very cheery child!!! Is very sweet as well! Also regarded as a very cute kid!

- During a photoshoot, she met a girl who was helping out with the outfits. As she learned more about her, she realized that she wants to be a seamstress when she gets older. She thought this was cool and they become friends! (Met Kokoto Hiramatsu)

- Another photoshoot, she met a girl who was being broody in a corner. As she talked with her more, she figured out she was upset because her dad left her family for someone else. Sakura comforted her a lot, and they quickly became friends. (Met Ayaka Mochizuki)

Middle school:

- Her parents got her a manager (Referred to as Manager R)

- Manager R began to get extremely concerned with the quality of her work, so she made her re-do assignments until they were “perfect” (Perfectionistic habits mold from this, also makes her think the only way she’ll be loved if she is perfect)

- Got a major role on a TV Show, played an important side character. Many people shipped her character with another character in the show. This lead for both of their managers to meet and agree for them to fake date for popularity and profit.

- The other actor didn’t like being in a relationship at all. Began to secretly insult her behind the cameras and manipulated her. Made her purposefully stop eating as much and made her insecure about her body. She begun to hate herself for what she was, and fell into a dark period of her life.

- Ayaka and Kokoro tried their best to make her feel better. They then decided together that they should just leave the country entirely for the benefit of all of them. Ayaka’s mom lives in Japan and Kokoro’s parents didn’t care about her so they could easily move there, it’s only Sakura’s manager that they have to remove.

- For about 5 months, the trio tries their best to remove Sakura’s manager from her life. The breaking straw is when she protested during a photoshoot snd left immediately. Manager R immediately cut off contact with her and she was free.

- Moved to Japan during her 8th grade year under the supervision of Ayaka’s mom. She temporarily enrolled in a school and was slowly reviving her old personality.

- During finals season, Sakura decided that they should all become idols at Yumenosaki. Ayaka and Kokoro also agree to this plan. With Kokoro’s connections with the Tenshouin family, they finally get a chance to enroll at Yumenosaki academy.

Summer before 1st year:

- Went to a festival with Ayaka and Kokoro. They ended up getting lost and Sakura decided to wander around. Accidentally stumbled upon Shinobu (he was lost too) and they began talking. They realize that even though they dont have much in common, they were very similar. They became friends for the day and they help each other get prizes and stuff. (Key moment is when Sakura guessed how many marbles were in a jar and won a plushie of a frog and a fox. She ended up giving the frog plushie to Shinobu.)

- Didn’t get each other contact info, ended up loosing contact sadly. Sakura still remembers him as “The boy with pretty hair.” Keeps the plushie she won dear to her heart.

Basically it for main lore before yumenosaki 🎉 another post will be made about 1st - 3rd year lore in the future 🎊

[Also some @‘s for mutuals who might be interested : @aroace-poly-show , @transgender-eichi , @maoisarap , @mutsuowo , @eekykins ]

[i-promise-im-not-a-murderer]

Even more Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji headcannons because I can't stop thinking about these characters for two seconds!!!!

- Grell's multilingual (English, Russian, French, Japanese, BSL, and Morse Code)

- William has at the very least a basic understanding of most languages that Grell speaks

- Grell and Ronald talk shit about people in the office and gossip in BSL so most people don't understand what they're saying

- Undertaker visited the Phantomhive manor almost daily before the tragedy. He misses sitting around with his family while watching the twins play

- Two of the lockets on Undertaker's belt are dedicated to Vincent and Rachel

- Lizzy remembers that Undertaker is hers and Ciel's grandfather and she doesn't understand why he pretends to not be related to him

- Lizzy cries a lot at night because she misses how her family was before the tragedy, she's so childish because she misses when she was a child and everything was alright

- Ciel's actually quite close with Finny, as he's his main caretaker when Ciel's having an episode. Finny knows more about Ciel's backstory than any other mortal and Ciel has grown to see Finny as a kind of older brother

-Bard treats the other servants like his children, even though Mey-Rin is old enough to have been his younger sister. Bard finds comfort in the family he has and he loves them all deeply

-Alois made Claude start killing people at the manor so that he could take to Grell more. Over time, she became somewhat of a mother to Alois and visited without him having to kill people to see her. She eventually helped Alois realize that he deserves people around him who care more than Claude and they go on little mother/son dates. The two love their bond because Grell gets the child she's always wanted and Alois gets the parent he's always needed

- Grell occasionally brings Alois to work. William hates this, but he secretly admires how good of a mother Grell is. He sometimes catches himself thinking about raising Alois with her

- Ronald moved in with Grell to spend more time together and they have to constantly dismiss dating rumors

- The reapers all have mourning lockets dedicated to Eric and Alan, none of them have ever really recovered from their deaths

- Grell's family was originally from Russia, that's why she's fluent in Russian, William learned so that he could talk to her properly when Grell first arrived in dispatch

- (Tw) Grell dealt with csa in her time as a human to "fix her". Whenever she has a hard time with her body because of this or dysphoria, Ronald will get William to go with him and help Grell distract herself from the problem or let her cry with someone. Grell always feels a lot better after her crying sessions with them

- Othello has experimented with a lot of things in order to help Grell feminize herself

- Snake gets really insecure about his scales. Whenever Grell is over at the manor, she sneaks off with him to about their struggles with fitting in, the two are actually really close because of their shared experiences with poor treatment from others

- William is really good at baking and often bribes Grell into work with the sweets he makes. He actually gives them to her as a way to show affection, hence why almost everything is heart shaped, Grell's starting to catch on

- William has to be physically forced to stay home when he's sick because he's so dedicated to his work

[grilde1chesse]

ODDLY SPECiFiC RESiDENT EViL HEAD CANONS

characters i’ll include

jack krauser

leon kennedy

ada wong

albert wesker

luis sera

jill valentine

chris redfield

claire redfield

WARNING: childhood trauma/abuse, implied/referenced violence, mental health

JACK KRAUSER

she jack on my krauser till i major

transgender and mlm. no room for argument. it’s canon, i’m capcom

was the youngest of 3 brothers

grew up on the country side with traditional parents

his parents were physically abusive to both each other and the kids, meaning he grew up with out a healthy understanding of love. he doesn’t know how to express affection or love outside of violence because of this

ran away and joined the army at 18 and didn’t leave until operation javier. the army became a second home and he never learned how to function in society outside combat.

he hates that he’s gay and because of this he resents anyone he falls for (also partially because of how he communicates affection). liking boys not only insults his masculinity, but also makes him dysphoric, as he sees that aspect of himself as the remaining female side of him that he’ll never be able to get rid of

building off of the last bullet, this is why he’s so hard on leon. i’ll probably make another post diving deeper into their dynamic so i’ll leave it at that

he doesn’t listen to music often, but when he does it’s metal

LEON KENNEDY

he was the first protag i ever played as so i’m biased😞 ik i’m a basic fan i’m sorry gang

he’s more of a dog person and probably had one as a childhood pet, but has been scared of them ever since raccoon city

bisexual

was an amateur guitar player for some time but dropped it once becoming an agent

mamas boy

had a bit of chub before becoming an agent

older!leon has a dad bod & beer belly. i don’t make the rules it’s canon, trust

not even a ship really (maybe it is idk) but i feel like him and chris experimented with their sexuality together? idk take that how you will

i feel like he’s got facial or body dysmorphia and is extremely insecure about how he looks / talks, or at least used to be

bleaches his hair

building off the last bullet again, Leon was blonde when he was younger, but his hair gradually got darker as he grew up. eventually he started bleaching it because he didn’t want to have brown hair. his natural hair color from re2-re4 is dirty blonde. he stopped dying it as he got older

no matter how badly he wants a normal domestic life (to settle down, start a family, and give his kids the childhood he never had) he’s secretly terrified of the idea. he doesn’t know how to function outside of work, even when on vacation he can’t seem to relax

speaking of a domestic life, he’d name his kids some stupid shit like hunter or something

autistic. he has trouble decoding social cues (like when ashley jokes with him) and is fairly awkward. was definitely the “weird kid” in middle school

played hockey as a kid

i feel like he comes from somewhere cold, and because of that is fairly adapted to cooler temps but also can’t stand heat (like at all)

sleeps with a billion pillows

chronic gum chewer. it’s a comforting, absent minded movement that keeps him grounded on the job. i wanna say his favorite flavor is just regular bubble gum but maybe that’s just because i hate mint idk

has sensitive skin and eczema

ADA WONG

ada’s hard because she has no canon backstory or even personality really💔

has cherry blossom lip gloss and re-applies it religiously

has drop foot (i genuinely can’t think of any other reason she’d always been wearing high heels 😞)

mommy issues

was in and out of foster care her entire childhood only to end up back with her mom everytime

because she was so heavily neglected as a kid & basically raised herself, ada’s become extremely self sufficient and refuses to rely or depend on anyone

she has issues identifying her feelings and honestly doesn’t care enough to work through them. because of this she isn’t sure if she even likes leon at all. she can’t tell if she loves him or just finds him useful, ether way she wants him around/safe and she isn’t sure why

she smokes sometimes but hates it, so she only falls back on nicotine when doing horribly. she carries cigarettes around with her on missions

ALBERT WESKER

kitty meow meow

on the aro/ase spec

has autism, ASPD (psychopath), and a god complex (obviously)

sees himself as better than average people because he doesn’t experience sexual attraction (no hate to ppl who think otherwise, i just really can’t see him any sort of sexual context). he views sexuality as a weakness and looks down on it

mlm

i feel like him and chris have somewhat of a krauser/leon dynamic if that makes sense. he sees chris as an almost equal, but also as a threat because of it. he respects him to a degree. again, i’m probably going to make a post on them later so i’ll leave it at that

i haven’t finished 6 yet so correct me if this has been disproven in canon, but i like to think he had jake on purpose. while yes, he didn’t know about jake, i like to think he hooked up with ms muller with the goal of having a child. he probably deemed her as suitable, and had desirable traits that he wanted to carry on, but never knew she actually got pregnant

listens to classical music & maybe 80s as well?

not a head canon, but the band she wants revenge reminds me of him a lot

insane skincare routine

sensory issues & sensitive eyes because of uroboros (leads to overstimulation sometimes which makes him even more of a grumpy bitch)

loves flowers

doesn’t smoke often but when he does he prefers camels or marlboro blues (i don’t smoke (except for when i’m missing you) so idrk what i’m talking about)

LUiS SERA

inclusivity win! the scientist that helped make the tyrant actively chasing you down is gay!

mlm

grew up in a casually christian household & still holds onto some core ideologies, though in a more superstitious way than religious

holds onto a cross necklace from his childhood & prays when in tight situations

his parents smoked and that’s how he picked it up

speaking of, he’s extremely picky when it comes to what cigarettes he smokes. he prefers marlboro reds (again idfk what im talking about)

his jacket is custom tailored

he came from a poor household

probably wears eyeliner

has been to a gay bar

very physically affectionate & probably kisses people when drunk (platonically)

JiLL VALENTiNE

her name is jill sandwich!!!!!

lesbian. sorry i don’t make the rules. she’s gay. sorry chris & carlos

i mean just look at her she’s lesbian

has a little sister

can speak some french, though not too well due to lack of use

still has blonde hair from re6, but dyes it. (wesker absolutely killed the melanin in her skin and hair.) because she doesn’t have time to be constantly re-dying her hair so she has blonde streaks & roots.

has a cat

her favorite fruit is a pear. idk why she just seems the type

CHRiS REDFiELD

something about a boulder

bisexual

has been horribly down bad for jill for years (she sees him as a brother ;-( tough luck big guy)

was the stereotypical overprotective brother when him and claire were younger, always scaring the shit out of anyone she brought home

extremely good with dogs - actually considered being a dog trainer when he was younger

god knows that man RARELY does laundry - if at all. probably smells like a dog & uses 4 in 1 shampoo. stinky vermin

speaking of laundry, he probably wears swim trunks on the regular bc all his clothes are dirty

terrified of commitment

total adrenaline junkie with a savior complex (then again, doesn’t every resident evil protagonist?)

would be an amazing dad but is terrified of the idea of settling down. no matter how badly he wants to have a domestic life he doesn’t know how to adapt to it

has a german shepherd

can’t cook for the life of him; lives off microwaveable meals

literally the definition of “damn girl, you live like this???”

insanely high pain tolerance

CLAiRE REDFiELD

thinking about how she was 19 during raccoon city (making her you her than ashley was during re4)

dyes her hair auburn

bisexual

has probably punched at least one person for saying some stupid bigoted shit

she’s 100% messy, brash, and assertive, & i’m sick of pretending she’s not. she was raised by chris, the boulder punching fist for brains? no way is her room organized

has kissed jill before

her and chris used 2 do target practice in junk yards together & she once accidentally shot herself in the leg after shooting at metal

has always had crazy high pain tolerance, it runs in the family

because of her high pain tolerance she used to get hurt a lot on accident as a kid (doing stupid shit like messing around with fire or blades)

hates wearing her hair down

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

Request Statuses

Okay, said I’d do this yesterday, so here it is. I’m not naming who made what specific request here, whether anonymous or not. Just dropping them here so everyone can check on the status of their request.

If you don’t see your request here for whatever reason, please let me know!! I haven’t deleted any since I joined Tumblr, so there is always a chance that it didn’t go through.

I will update this regularly as statuses change; and when I update it, I will update the date next to the link in my Masterpost.

Created 30 Oct 2023

Updated 2 Dec 2023

Tongue Ring (Sanji x Reader)

Status: Accepted, actively in-progress

Only One Bed (Mihawk x Reader)

Status: Accepted, outlining, definitely NSFW and it’s also going to be hilarious

Marine!Reader x whomever of your favorite pirates would be more likely to seduce her to the dark-side.

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, definitely going to be Shanks because he absolutely would a thousand times over.

Sanji x picky eater!reader x (possibly) Zoro

Status: Accepted, brainstorming may be more than one part but probably no more than three, definitely going the love triange route and including Zoro.

“Tell them you’re pregnant” story with Ace and/or Sabo

Status: Accepted, but delayed until I get further in the manga, bear with me on that. I will definitely be writing Ace once I re-familiarize with him. This is the first time I’ve reread the manga in probably ten years. I barely scratched the surface with Sabo last time I read, mostly only flashbacks, so I’m not yet familiar with him at ALL.

Headcanons: How the Straw Hats (East Blue crew in particular help each individual member cope/recover when something triggers them.

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, may be a few

Sanji x secretly-a-princess!Reader

Status: Accepted, outlining, in development, will be multi-chapter, and there’s going to be a puppy for some reason.

Sanji x curvy!Reader headcanon

Status: Accepted, not yet in development

Too small, oneshot fic(s), Shanks x Reader and possibly others, NSFW

Status: Accepted, in development for Shanks, may or may not do Mihawk as well

Sanji x Reader with eating disorder

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, also researching because it's a subject that deserves to be depicted realistically

OPLA character x S/O!Reader who looks cute and bubbly but is actually quite strong.

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, leaning strongly toward Zoro because I love the idea of him with a bubbly lil s/o

Headcanons (inspo from Because I Got High) where reader either gets too messed up from smoke/alcohol or side effects from something like anxiety meds, and character has to comfort/calm them down

Status: Accepted, planning to do Sanji, Zoro, Shanks, Mihawk, and Buggy, got a little of it drafted out for Zoro, Shanks, and Mihawk

OPLA!Sanji and/or Zoro x Reader; drabble on a reader who is older than them (mid 30s), who thinks she is “too old”

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, I’m in my early 30s so heavy relate

Mihawk x Reader; he meets a singer at Baratie and falls for her (likely being in denial over it)

Status: Accepted, not yet in development. Probably going to be a two parter at least, and also shamelessly throwing my own flair in because I sing/play guitar, so reader’s probably going to be a guitarist as well, as long as that’s cool.

General Mishanks request:

Status: Tentatively accepted, probably going to aim toward younger Mishanks (early 20s). I’ve only done one Mishanks headcanon re:how they first met/became rivals, so this is a little out of my ballpark, but I’m willing to give it a try. If I feel I can’t write it in a way that I’m satisfied with, I will let you know.

Comedic NSFW, Mihawk x Reader

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, already cackling like a witch standing over a cauldron over this one

IMihawk x Reader request, fluffy, Mihawk needing a bit of reassurance because he's a bit insecure of how tight Reader's friendship with shanks is becoming

Status: Accepted, brainstorming, will probably start outlining soon. Actually going have something akin to this a bit in my Mihawk x OC fic, Hearing Problems, but it's still going to be a couple chapters down the road before I get there, so this would be a good way to explore the idea.

Headcanons request for Shanks, Zoro, Sanji, Mihawk and Buggy taking Reader to a masquerade ball

Status: Accepted, going to have to study the fundamentals of masquerade balls a lil and decide how I want to go about this exactly. If it's okay a couple of the scenarios may be them meeting Reader AT the ball. Because I feel like Shanks would probably just gatecrash for the hell of it (he heard there was an open bar and just went for it); and the thought of Zoro getting lost and accidentally stumbling into a masquerade ball with no idea what's going on has got me 🤭

Shanks x Reader x Buggy, age gap, Shanks and Buggy get isekai'd into our world, Halloween vibes, further details here

Status: Accepted, early brainstorming stages, this just seems like it would be so much fun thank you 🙏

Mihawk x Reader, proposal

Status: Accepted, will be treated as a sequel to YSAM and Ten Years, details here