#there's a bunch there obviously not featuring rogue as well

[theheroheart]

All 20 released Doctor Who stills featuring Rogue.

Source: The Black Archive.

[childofaura]

Ok... I swore to myself I wasn't gonna make another negative MAWS post, that I was just gonna leave it at the Twink Slade disappointment post.

But apparently there's this trend that's been happening on Twitter, where people are trying to bring up the 2004 "The Batman" designs to try and defend the designs of the MAWS rogue gallery. And that was the territory I CANNOT let go, as someone who is a fan of Jeff Matsuda and his character designs.

SO FIRST, LET ME CLARIFY: I'm simply making ONE post about ONE factor of MAWS that irritates me. I'm not here to just sit and constantly bash on the show. I wouldn't do that, I have a personal close friend of mine who enjoys the show and I'm happy for her and I want her to enjoy the show. I have SO many gripes and reservations but I recognize those are personal.

I'll be putting this under a Read More and tagging it as Anti-MAWS so MAWS fans don't have to read/deal with this post. Probably just don't read my tags as well.

So if there's one thing that has irked me the most about MAWS, it's the redesigns and rewrites of Supes' rogue galleries. Mostly the redesigns though. MAWS took a bunch of colorful, diverse, and fantastical designs and made them monotonous, bland, and simply not fun at all. And yes, while the in-universe explanation (Being that they're all mechanically enhanced rather than freak accidents or born that way) makes sense, it still makes the villains incredibly un-appealing. EVERYONE is in boring black, white, and gray armor (aside from Parasite and while I think his physical design is neat I have issues with his character rewrite too, I'm just not here to discuss that). Everyone who had incredibly fun or creative designs was horribly washed out. Silver Banshee went from being a literal ghostly wraith to a boring motorcycle-looking chick. Livewire went from a vibrant blue lightning motif (that SHE herself created) to boring merc armor. And yes, I have issues with Slade's armor, the head was promising but the overall design has color-balancing issues.

Now let's look at the redesigns of the rogue gallery for the 2004 "The Batman" show. These are mostly drastically different from their original design counterparts, just like MAWS. But the massive difference is that most of these designs are still colorful (where it applies, obviously not to Penguin), recognizable, and push the borders of imagination; They're so ludicrous and exaggerated in their design and their physical features. Even if I was disappointed in some of the character rewrites (Like Mr. Freeze having only a small cameo to Nora in the flashback, but mainly being another selfish thug), the designs are still great. You can look at The Batman villain designs and easily recognize them because they follow the basic structure of their original designs.

Joker:

Is still in his green, purple, and orange color palette, with his trademark freakish grin. The design takes creative liberties with the spiked hair, the more athletic physique, and the actual clothing style of his outfit, but this is clearly meant to be Joker.

Mr. Freeze:

Is now essentially a cryomancer thanks to his mutation, but this is still obviously Mr. Freeze. Some kind of helmet (in this case encased in his own ice) wearing a thermal freeze suit, and his red eyes invoking the red goggles he wore in his original iteration.

Catwoman:

The design exaggerates a lot of features of the OG outfit, like the ears and the goggles (though the OG design really just has eye spaces), and uses shades of crimson and purple, but you look at the black bodysuit and the whip around her waist and she can clearly be identified.

The main argument I'm making with the 2004 Batman designs is that they're A) recognizable to their original counterparts by invoking the same color scheme and basic design points, B) Colorful and pushing the lunacy of a world full of supervillains, and C) Completely stand out from each other, no two villains look as though they're of similar origins (besides obvious pairs like Joker/Harley Quinn and the two Clayfaces, the latter which was a guy who took concentrated serum made from Ethan Bennett's Clayface DNA). The Batman designs are good because while they ARE drastically different from their original counterparts, they honor the original designs.

Whereas in the MAWS redesigns, none of the redesigns are reminiscent of their original counterparts (besides the obvious Brain and Monsieur Mallah, kind of hard to fuck that up), and lack the fantastical element that The Batman redesigns (And the original Superman show, where it applies) had.

Livewire:

Looks nothing like her original counterpart. The armored clothes, the lack of lightning motif, lack of color to her outfit (I'm not here to talk about the race-swapping), none of it is supposed to tip you off to being Livewire, especially when her character is written so drastically different. You should be able to tell who Livewire is BEFORE you see her powers.

When OG Livewire looks like this:

Silver Banshee:

Is just a regular human in drab clothing. There's some kind of attempt to give her the hint of a ghost motif with the bone legs, but then that disappears in her later costume design. Same later costume that tries to half-ass a skull motif on the helmet but it doesn't work with the helmet's angles.

When this is Silver Banshee's original design (going with a still from Batman Unlimited)

And if they wanted to stray from the whole "supernatural" aspect, they could have compromised like they did in Suicide Squad: Hell to Pay:

Which I mean I still don't like that redesign as much as Silver Banshee's OG design, but it's still recognizable and it's still cool.

The bottom line is basically this: You don't have to justify liking this new Superman show and its take on new characters. But to try and say the character designs on MAWS are like the 2004 "The Batman" cartoon redesigns is such an unequal and imbalanced comparison. The thought process for the character designs in these shows are so drastically different from each other, and the execution of said character designs aren't comparable.

[anglers1mp]

Boo! Small part of Chapter one

… here’s my AO3 account I’m working on a bunch of crossovers at once and haven’t published them yet but be sure to look into if you want or message me about it on tumblr! I NEED A BETA READER GOD HELP ME

Blood was rushing out of Danny at a fast pace, his face contorted in agony. A scowl wrapped around his eyes, leaning the eyelids drooping as he struggled to run anymore. God it felt like he was running for days.. He was FINALLY 18 and decided to get his ghostly secret off his chest and get on with it. Now in all the versions where he does tell his parents they take it well! So why not now? The gods hate him Danny had decided. At least he had a ghost friend. Key word: Had. One very nice Jason Todd, whom was a very nice guy even helped him steal Johnny’s bike for about 13 minutes before the older ghost noticed. Fun times- and shit. A blast of green energy blasted against buildings beside him, sparking a massive blaze of green fire and smoke. A frown creeped onto his pale features. Eyes burning neon green in his human form. His breathes were coming in erratic, burning his throat with green sour bile as it almost creeped out, but he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t handle them without becoming tired. Curse his stupid rogues and Vlad-all attacking in the same night. He was dead tired. Pun intended. They had obviously waited and now they knew about Halfas! God fucking damn it.

“Oh. Oh God.” He gasped pulling at his stained green shirt and deep brown pants. Both stained with his blood and ectoplasm. Gross. His breathing was racked with pain and another blast hit beside him. …He groaned heavily in pain as he ran head first into a behemoth of a person..

[practically-an-x-man]

2, 6, 12, 19, 25 for the End of Year asks!

Thank you!

End of Year Asks

2. Album of the year?

So Much (for) Stardust by Fall Out Boy! I've got it on vinyl and I have been listening to it basically nonstop (some exaggeration... but not much) since it came out

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

Oooh, that's tough. I think I'm gonna go with Collectors from season one of the Sandman - I watched the show early this year (that one was my favorite episode) and promptly fell headfirst into a Sandman hyperfixation. I read the comics, wrote some fanfics, did SFX makeup of the Corinthian, and even got to meet one of the artists at a convention (did the SFX makeup again and HE asked ME for a photo when I showed him, so that was really cool)

It's obviously not any internal shift or revelation, not really an episode that defines my life or anything, but it's probably had the most tangible ripple effect of any TV show I watched this year.

12. Talk about a new friend you made this year

Well, I don't know if you know him... he writes angst really well, and he's got a bunch of really interesting and complex OCs. We mainly got in touch at the end of the year, with this Secret Santa game he created? Anyway, they're pretty neat and really helped me explore some cool ideas with my OCs. ;)

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

Later this year, I'll be moving away from home and attempting to get a start in my full SFX career. To be honest, I am TERRIFIED (yes, I have cried myself to sleep some nights bc I'm so stressed about rent and finances)... but if I get past that, I'm really excited to take that leap and dive into my passion. Hopefully someday you'll see my work on the big screen!

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one

Well, I've already talked about my headfirst slide into Cooperstown on a bad bet the Sandman fandom this year, so I'll talk about Prometheus. They're a rogue dream, formerly one of Morpheus' first creations (the Fear of the Dark, AKA Nyx). They carry a torch and wander the dreamscape by night, fighting off the nightmares of other dreamers to help them find peaceful sleep. They were originally created as a reader-insert, so I've intentionally avoided describing any physical features - they've since grown a lot as a character, but I keep that lack of physical features because I think it's a fun writing exercise and really works for the nonhuman eternal being side of things. I've technically written four fics for them (Secret Worlds, (Farewell) Wanderlust, The Calling, and a crossover gift fic called King), but I plan to write another fic called Ruin to finish out their story. I really do enjoy writing for them, though, and I doubt Ruin will be the end of it.

[thevindicativevordan]

Since you mentioned that Williamson would probably launch a Superman ongoing. How do you imagine his run would look like?

Well I called it, not that it was a hard thing to predict:

Looks pretty much exactly what I expected. All the classic elements get plenty of focus, Lois is back at the Daily Planet, Clark will be going up against a bunch of classic villains - Parasite is the villain of the first arc, seems Livewire, Bizarro, and Silver Banshee won't be far behind - classic supporting cast members like Jimmy Olsen will be getting used, and there may be either some new faces or revamps of old ones. That cop with the pony tail in the upper right might be a new take on Inspector (Commissioner?) Henderson. Williamson is at his best when he's focused on one character and just doing fun superhero adventures instead of trying to write big events or copy Morrison. Robin and Flash delivered that for me and were enjoyable, he should bring a similar level of quality here. If nothing else the use of classic Superman Rogues who haven't gotten attention in a while like Livewire, Silver Banshee, and Bizarro get points with me, I don't expect him to write the definitive Parasite arc, but if he can at least provide entertaining Superman stories featuring classic Superman Rogues I'll be happy.

Kaminski (head editor for the Superbooks) hinted on Twitter that Zod was going to play an important role in the Superbooks next year. Given Williamson already used him once for Batman/Superman - his use there of Zod was good - I wouldn't be surprised if he uses him again here. Perhaps Zod is the figure in shadow if it isn't teasing a new Superman Rogue. I've long wanted Zod to fill the Ra's role in Superman's Rogues Gallery and Williamson did position him as that, if he is writing Zod I hope he continues to develop that characterization for him.

Obviously Campbell's art is gorgeous, but does anyone really think he's going to last long on a monthly ongoing? Naomi and Far Sector really struggled to come out on time, if Campbell can do just one arc I'll be happy. Dragotta is a good artist too, but I don't know if he's fast enough to do a monthly these days. I'll enjoy their time on Superman regardless, can't wait to see them draw the villains!

Now for the rest...

Anonymous asked:

New Superbook lineup?

First DC panel thus far to actually talk about the big plans for 2023. Honestly I'm pleased overall with the news that was shared.

Action is becoming a Superfamily book with PKJ continuing to write the main feature, which will still be standard issue length. Lineup is Clark, Kara, Conner, Kenan, Jon, Natasha, and the two Phaelosians from Warworld that Superman adopted: Osul and Othul. Ever since Detective Comics became a Batfamily book during Rebirth I've been wanting to see someone try and do the same for the Superfamily. Metallo is going to be the main villain for the first arc starting in Action 1051, and seeing Metallo be a threat strong enough to challenge the entire Superfamily has me hyped. Loved how PKJ has written the book up till now, hopefully this switch doesn't cause him to struggle. If he does a good job he'll be delivering sorely needed development to Superman's Rogues and his Family, two areas I've long been begging to see more attention given.

It's a small detail but I love that Kenan still has his white and black yin-yang s-shield underneath his jacket. Everyone looks good to me, although perhaps Nat should just change the color of her armor rather than wear a hoodie. And PKJ finally gets an artist who is both good and fast! Sandoval hasn't had trouble meeting a monthly schedule so Action should finally have an artist who can draw consecutive issues. Just need DC not to poach another artist from PKJ for their events, first Sampere then Federeci, go find another book to swipe artists from!

Two backups are being added, Jurgens writing kid Jon stories set in the past and Leah Williams writing Power Girl. Jurgens Lois and Clark was my favorite thing he's done since the Triangle Era, but this sounds boring. Doombreaker (aka Doomsday with four arms instead of two) is not a villain who is attracting my interest, PKJ already brought back Conduit Jurgens, you've said repeatedly you were going to tell a Conduit story after Action 1000 if you got to stay. Go tell that story instead of something conceptually dull as Doomsday 2.0. No opinion on Williams, her Trial of Magneto was terrible but her Mary Jane series was entertaining, I think PG will be a good fit for her, and there's always Johns' JSA if not.

Superman: Son of Kal-El is ending with issue 18 and DC is launching a new Adventures of Superman: Jon Kent 6-issue miniseries where Jon will fight Ultraman and meet Val-Zod. Taylor was claiming he was writing post-Kal-El Returns SSOKE issues a while back on Twitter, so I assume that DC is taking what he had planned for future issues and just doing it as a mini in hopes of increasing sales. My hunch is that this mini will mark the end of Taylor's time with Jon, and he'll either depart the Superman sphere entirely or go do a Val-Zod mini, since all he really cares about is using Jon's book to spotlight his OCs. I want it to flop so he'll be done for good, he's done jack shit to establish Jon outside of his bisexuality, countless other more pressing developments need to be done for Jon to really stand on his own as a hero, but of course Taylor would rather bring in his successor to Superman and try to push Val one last time over actually developing Jon as a character.

Saw that yet again you have people theorizing this is going to end with a version of kid Jon returning or Jon being deaged and at this point I don't even care if that happens. Taylor completely squandered the opportunity Jon represented, long as Val-Zod fucks off back home to Earth 2 and Taylor doesn't try to keep him on the main Earth then fine, whatever, you lot can have your kid Jon back. Completely wasted the potential he offered, might as well reset him back to default. I don't think that's happening, Othul and Osul are filling the kid role for Clark and Lois, plus there might be that Legacy League book coming yet. If it does I don't even care anymore. There's one ray of hope for me even now: Waid, Yang, Watters and PKJ might be writing him soon.

Coming up after Dark Crisis, we have the Lazarus Planet event. Waid has a good track record with weekly events - 52, the No Surrender trilogy - and the supporting writing lineup looks great: Yang, PKJ, Watters, and more. No Multiverse bullshit and any of those guys writing Jon will be an improvement over Taylor. Given this is where Jon is getting his electric blue powers, which will still be a thing over in Action and AoS, this event is going to be important for his direction as a character. Obviously this is me projecting, but I want to believe that one of the writers here is going to end up taking over control of Jon after Taylor's finishes his mini, ideally Yang or Watters. Hey Yang if you can bring Kenan into this event, do it. Taylor keeps trying to make his Superman stick, might as well assert yourself and use your Superman too where you can.

Good lineup generally. That's not counting other projects we know are coming such as Porter's Superboy mini, Waid's Superman: Testament book with Hitch, or Venditti's Superman '78 Season 2. Taylor hinted on Twitter that there are more announcements coming too after Action 1050, and PKJ hinted that something might be coming with Lana. Praying that a Steel miniseries with Lana in there as secondary protagonist/love interest is coming, written by Greg Pak, is in the works. Steel isn't in Action or advertised as being anywhere else, but he had a badass Action 1050 variant and it would be weird for him to just disappear. Irons is being positioned as a key player for PKJ Action, for him not to be with the Superfamily post 1050 must mean he's getting a book of his own. That's how I'm coping anyway.

Anonymous asked:

Thoughts on the NYCC announcements? Personally I'm afraid the Authority will go into the background if Action is becoming the Superfamily book, but I still trust PKJ to introduce interesting concepts.

Yeah I'm resigning myself to the Authority crew getting dropped. PKJ was asking on Twitter if people thought there was any interest in an Authority book not by him, and saying he'd want to get an LGBT+ writer for them. Later said that DC was trying to find a place for those characters, so maybe we'll get a new Superman & the Authority book down the road. I wish they'd induct Apollo into the Superfamily, getting him away from Midnighter who always overshadows him (heh remind you of another duo?) would be good for him. Let him play off of other flying bricks and show how he's similar and how he's different. Let him bond with Jon over being a queer hero and the difficulties that come with that, of trying to establish a place for yourself in the shadow of one of the greatest heroes of all time. I want Apollo so badly to be inducted into the Superfamily but I don't think it's happening. Can always dream though!

[shelby-love]

SIRIUS BLACK

A little Bit of Amortentia

Requested: yes

Prompts: none

Warning(s): none this is a certified fluff piece (2.3K words)

Author’s note: I had so much fun writing this! Harry Potter is such a great world, and I’d love to explore more of it. Requests for HP are OPEN!!

P.S for everyone wondering Remus is actually my favorite out of the Marauders

~

"Well I still think you're missing out," Lilly stated after a long rant and because of how sweet she was, she had decided to stop her mouth right at that sentence.

You only laughed lightly, pushing through the student body with Lily Evans hot on your robe. "Sneaking out to Hogsmeade is something I'm fine with missing out on."

She shook her head, determination settling hard in her brow. "That's beside the point."

"Then what is the point?" You asked, hugging your textbook closer to your chest. When you noticed that the auburn-haired girl was no longer by your side you bunched your brows together and turned around. "Lily? Lily, what are you doing?"

Her eyes were wide, bright green eyes blazing at you. "You seriously have no idea?"

You had idea of course. So much so that you felt embarrassed by the mere thought of it…

Him.

"Come Lily. We're late for Potions."

She shook her head and followed you reluctantly, only because she knew that your professor would surely be disappointed if you two showed up late. Lily and you were after all, Horace Slughorn's favorite students.

"This isn't over," She mumbled.

Perhaps for her it wasn't. Lily Evans tended to see the best in all people. It was the good in her that made her give in to James Potter little after Christmas this year after hating him her entire schooling at Hogwarts.

"He matured a lot," she would tell you, and while that might have been true for James it surely wasn't true for the boy you laid your desires upon.

Sirius Black.

Either he was purposely ignoring you, or he really was a dimwit.

***

"Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world. It is distinctive for its mother-of-pearl sheen, and steam rises from the potion in spirals." Horace Slughorn informed, keeping a safe distance from the steaming love potion. The rest of the girls in the class not so much. Each of them neared the potion little by little with a boy in mind. Lily and you both shared the same thoughts as those love-obsessed girls – only you didn't show it. Despite having boys in mind, Lily and you stood put.

"Lily, dear, how about you come here and tell us what you smell?"

You hard-pressed your shoulder against hers as she smiled shyly, obvious to what she was going to smell. James Potter stood at the other end of the assembly of students, looking at his lovely girlfriend with pure adornment.

For a second, they had you wondering if you could ever find love like that.

"Do you know why I asked Lily to tell us what she smells?" Horace asked, sending you a look that had a simple meaning.

"Because the potion is supposed to smell differently to each of us, according to what attracts us…" You answered quickly, just like he wanted you to.

"Marvelous Y/N. Good job," Slughorn praised you whilst ushering Lily to tell you all what she smelt. From the corner of your eye you managed to catch James' sly smirk as his eyes darted from you, to his very uninterested friend.

Sirius Black.

You swallowed, focusing your eyes on your best friend that stood in front of the potion, holding her hair so it doesn’t fall into the potion with a face as red as a tomato. "Vanilla, freshly cut oranges and –"

He cheeks flamed even more if that was even possible. She dashed away from the love potion and stood back next to you without revealing the third thing, although everyone knew already. James was grinning like an idiot. "What was the third smell?"

She shyly turned her mouth to your ear, "James' quidditch uniform."

You laughed out loud before Lily shushed you down frantically.

It was all fun and games until Horace called out for you, "Y/N would you mind telling us what you smell? Don't be shy now, come."  

A part of you wanted to say "Yes, professor I would mind." but the other more rational, and smarter part of you had tied your hands behind your back in defeat. Lily gave you a push and sooner than later you found yourself standing over the love potion.

"I-I smell…" You inhaled slowly, the potion's fumes filling you up. Several different scents found their way into your nostrils, making you have a hard time deciphering them because of the sensual overdrive they gave you. "Roses…the smell of sea and-"

"Oh no," you mumbled, barely audible for everyone but yourself.

"Was there something you wanted to say dear?" Horace asked, having heard your mumbling barely.

"No…I um, smell petrichor," You stated somewhat awkwardly but very, very quickly. "You know, um, when the r-rain hits the ground…"

"Ah, yes," realization dawned upon your professor. "A lovely smell. A lovely smell indeed. Very well, miss Y/LN thank you. You may go back to your place."

Lily Evans waited for you, beaming, "Mind telling me what the third smell was?"

"Shut it Lily."

"But I told you mine!"

***

You glanced at the sign above the pink looking door and sighed. Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, it said. You had known about this small tea shop that was located on a side road off the High Street in Hogsmeade Village even before you had arrived at Hogwarts. A boy from Hufflepuff had taken you there on a date once, sometime during your fifth year. It wasn't an especially pleasant memory, being cramped and surrounded by snogging couples at only 15 with a boy you didn't particularly like that way. Nevertheless, it had happened, and there was nothing you could do about the lingering memory.

The overall cute place was owned by Madam Puddifoot; the same woman who dearly welcomed you in the moment you stepped through the door.

You hoped to spot Lily there, after all that's why you were there. When the front of your little notebook changed under the influence of the Protean charm, you knew it was Lily instantly. While the Marauders had their own tricks, maps and such, Lily and you had thought of something far more practical. It would do you good, the charm, as it was expected to be known by every student that wants to take the N.E.W.T.

A win-win situation that was.

But although Lily Evans was nowhere to be seen, you still decided to sit down, trusting her not to pull any tricks on you. Save for the snowy weather, your day has been good so far and you didn’t want anyone to disrupt it.

Cautiously, you sat down and leaned against the plush sofa, discarding your scarf and coat along the way.

"What can I get ya lovely?" A sweet woman asked, hearts practically swimming within her irises. A pale pink apron with daisies was secured tightly around her waist, dolling her up prettily.

"I actually won't be staying, I'm waiting for-" You started, although you were sure in the fact you were going to have to buy gilly water at the very least. Even waiting comes at a price here.

But that didn't seem to be the case as the bells jingle and a dark figure waltzes through. The ladies' man, a member of the Marauders that had the most beautiful features pursued by impeccable dark hair and grey eyes walked in without a care in the world. Sirius didn't know it, but he had your toes curling every time.

You immidiately glanced around the cute shop, seeing nothing but loving couples.

No lone girl in the shop save for you.

Realization struck you in the gut and you swallowed, wanting now more than ever to disappear into a hole…or turn into a little bird and fly away.

His eyes swept across the stuffed shop, getting attention of several girls who were obviously there on a date. Boys exchanged distasteful glances between themselves, sensing Sirius to be an equal competitor that could easily give them a run for their money. "Y/N?"

You dared to say his voice softened upon seeing you. "Sirius."

Sirius' smile widened teasingly. It looked like the smile he would give his best of friends.

But you didn't want that. Not that you would tell him that.

He glanced around the shop once again before slipping into the free chair opposite of you. Without a care in the world, he stripped his snowy coat off his shoulders, his muscles tensing under the movements.

You swallowed.

"I'll have some butterbeer thank you," Sirius said, pulling out a generous amount of sickles for the waiting waitress you forgot was even standing there.

"And the lovely lady?" She mused, giving you a wink.

"Pumkin juice." You choke out.

Like a real gentleman, Sirius halted your attempt to pay for your drink with a raised hand and a wink.

Why does everyone keep winking?

You shook your head at the rogue thought.

"4 sickles young lad."

Sirius handed her the coins and she disappeared, leaving a trail of literal hearts whisking underneath her steps. "Talk about exaggeration."

Sirius' low chuckle at your random comment had you flustered immediately.

"So –" You both voiced at the same time.

"No, you first." You said quickly, brushing some misplaced strands of hair out of the way.

"You can go fi-"

You gave Serius the look you would usually give Remus and James many times on many different occasions; the one that said not to argue with you. Only this time it felt like a completely different look. It intrigued the stubborn boy even more; dragging him deeper into the pit of feelings he had for you.

"Fine," he said, casually twining his fingers atop the table. "I have a question."

"Um…o-kay."

He smiled at your nervousness and decided at that moment to just blurt out the question that's been nagging him since it happened. "What did you smell during potions yesterday?"

"Y-you mean when I smelled the Amortentia?" The strongest love potion ever created that had the ability to reveal ones biggest attractions with a simple sniff. “That potion?”

"Mhmm," he said. "If you tell me what you smelled, I'll tell you what I smelled."

"You must be bloody joking," You exclaimed. Almost everyone knew that you smelled someone. Not just the rain and roses. Someone.

Unlike with Lily, they had no idea who it was.

No one knew save for Lily who probably told James.

Who probably told Remus?

Remus, Peter…

Sirius.

A million thoughts raced through your head. What at first was a blind date will turn out to be the biggest prank the Marauders ever pulled on someone. The biggest prank in Marauders history. You were sure of it.

"I-I should go," you muttered, grabbing your bag and coat in a haste to get out.

Sirius' eyes went wide in alarm, "What are you doing, Y/N? Where are you going?"

"Away from you," You said sternly. "I don't plan on being your new plaything so just leave me alone."

"Woah, woah, woah. Why would you think that?" He asked with what looked like genuine confusion as he held your hands in a vise grip to stop you from leaving.

"B-because…" Words stopped coming once you realized.

Telling him the reason behind it would ruin everything.

"Because you like me?"

You stared at him in shock, eyes widened to the size of a quidditch snitch. No, a bludger. "I don't know what to say to that."

Sirius outright laughed at you and your attempt to conceal what you both already knew, "Look…"

You swallowed.

"I like you too Y/N."

"I know, so let's just forget this ever happen- Wait what did you just say?"

The two of you were, unbeknownst to you in that moment, holding hands atop the cute table, looking like a real couple at that moment to anyone who walked into the shop.

"I like you," He repeated slowly, more audibly for you to comprehend this time. "I know I've been a…"

"Bully," You butted in quickly.

"No I wasn't!"

"Severus begs to differ," You reminded.

"Whatever," Sirius brushed you off, tightening his hold on your two hands. Warmth seemed to come off him in waves, making it all the more comfortable to be in his hold. No wonder girls fawned around him. "What I'm trying to say is – the four of us were idiots, and you were the girl I thought I didn't deserve."

You almost melted.

"So, when I saw what James has with Lily," He confessed. "I wanted that…but with you."

"So why didn't you come up to me?"

"Thought you'd reject me," He said quickly.

"True."

The way he looked at you had you tumbling down your brain for word, "B-but you've changed… And I like you too Sirius."

"I'd like to take you out somewhere else," Sirius proposed. "If you'd have me."

"Of course," You smiled, for the first time freely. "I'd like that very much."

Never in a million years would you have guessed this would be happening; Sirius standing behind you, helping you with your coat…

And holding your hand on the way out.

"You still didn't tell me."

“Tell you what?”

"What you smelled in the Amortentia."

The question didn't sound so attacking as it did 10 minutes ago, and you felt like you could answer it with more ease. "You really want to know?"

"Yes, I would like that very much."

"Fine," You stopped somewhere in the middle of the square, feeling quite brave and bold. "You."

He didn't look surprised, maybe relieved more than surprised. The relief shone in his grey eyes, you could see it. His long black hair blew against the wind that swept through Hogsmeade in a wildly matter. Sirius seemed closer now more than ever as he gazed into your eyes. Whilst you probably looked crazy in the cold wind, the weather only seemed to compliment the once a big troublemaker before you.

"Good."

You creased your brows, "You didn't tell me what you smelled."

Sirius chuckled, "You of course."

Pleased with his answer, you let him do something you've been dreaming about for quite some time.

He kissed you.

The kiss felt electrical, making your body go haywire. Sparks, as cliché as they sound, they were there, present from the moment the kiss started and until it ended. Sirius had his warm hand against your cold cheek, bringing you closer than ever before.

You hadn't shared this with any other boy save for the one you were with right now.

You didn't have what Lily and James did because their love was theirs and theirs only.

Sirius and you will build a love of your own. Something characteristic to you two only. Here in Hogsmeade, or wherever in the world. A long life was ahead of you and you, now more than ever, felt like you could do anything.

Even pass the N.E.W.T.

~

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MASTERLIST

[wiypt-writes]

Stark Spangled Banner

Ch23: In The Flesh Part 2: Unwelcome Distractions

Summary: The Avengers are hot on the trail of Ultron...but once again, things don’t go according to plan and a tangle with the Maximoff twins leaves the team shaken.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Warnings: Bad language, violence and crazy assed robots.

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

A/N: Huge credit to @angrybirdcr​ for these stunning edits which perfectly capture Steve and Katie’s visions...

Chapter 23 Part 1

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

The normal schedule at the tower was utterly disrupted the next morning. Maria had come to Katie and Steve’s floor to inform them the team was assembling in the lab and had given them both a quick briefing. The previous night they had been able to reboot most of the servers, and the environmental controls of the tower were finally online again, but there was still no trace of the sceptre or the robots. Thor was busy trying to get help from someone on Asgard, Clint was working with some old contacts to see if he could get anything, whilst Tony and Bruce were trying to track him from the lab where Katie had a suspicion they would probably had been all night

The elevator doors opened with a ding; Steve, Katie and Maria exiting and she continued her report on what she had found out about Ultron so far, following them up the stairs as she did.

“He’s all over the globe. Robotics labs, weapons facilities, jet propulsion labs. Reports of a metal man, or men, coming in and emptying the place,”

“Fatalities?” asked Steve.

“Only when engaged,” replied Hill, beginning to type on her tablet while she continued to talk. “Mostly guys left in a fugue state going on about old memories, worst fears, things moving on their own, and 'something too fast to see���.”

“Maximoffs.” Katie concluded.

“That makes sense he’d go to them. They have someone in common,” Steve said nodding as they reached the top of the stairs.

“Not anymore.” Maria replied handing the tablet over to Steve. On it was a picture of Strucker lying on his bed in his cell; dead. On the wall behind him, the word 'peace’ was painted in blood.

“Bit of a mixed message don’t you think?” Steve asked.

“Is it? I mean if it were my mission, world peace, I’d probably take out Strucker too.” Katie shrugged as Steve looked at her, before glancing back down at the tablet in my hands. “Ultron could be in any system, he could be pulling planes down out of the sky if he wanted.” she sighed, “What if he’s just doing what he’s supposed to?”

"If I thought Ultron was bringing peace I’d hang up my shield.” He shook his head, leaning against the banister.

“Would you?” Maria questioned curiously. Steve looked at her, taking a deep breath and cocking his head slightly to the right.

“Let me know if he leaves any more messages.” he said simply, ending the conversation.

Katie shot Maria a look, mouthed thanks at her and then headed after him.

As they walked towards the lab they both heard Clint talking on the phone to someone, apparently someone with authority.

“I answer to you. Yes Ma’am.”

He looked over, saw the Captain and ended the call. “I gotta go…” He looked at Katie, then Steve, waved the phone and said “Girlfriend.”

“Any of your old contacts come through?” Steve asked, seemingly on the outside accepting his explanation, although they both knew full well he had been talking to his wife. Only Steve wasn’t supposed to know that.

“Still waiting.”

“Wait faster.” Steve said simply, turning and heading off down towards the lab. Clint shot Katie a look before he glanced down his phone and headed off in the opposite direction. Katie caught up with Steve who cast a glance over his shoulder at Barton.

“Girlfriend.” He quipped and she laughed

“I know, as far as cover stories go, explaining away your wife as a girlfriend is pretty lame.” They entered the lab and immediately could her a gabble of voices as Rhodey was talking to Natasha and Tony through one of the screens.

“If you hear something we need to hear it too.” Nat said as Steve strode past towards Thor who was pacing behind where Banner sat at a computer.

“That goes for you too, watch your six.” Rhodey replied.

“Any help from on high?” Steve asked, as Thor walked down the few steps into the lower part of the lab. He shook his head.

“He’s either away from his post or he’s been ordered not to answer” Thor said, striding across the floor as they both turned to walk back towards Katie “Ultron can’t hide forever”

“He’s not exactly hiding.” Katie said, handing Thor the tablet. He glared down at the offending item and the picture it was displaying.

“What’s this?” Tony asked moving to get a closer look only to have the tablet slapped into his chest by the obviously still annoyed God.

“It’s a message,” Steve replied. “Ultron killed Strucker.”

“And he did a Banksy at the crime scene, just for us,” Tony said sarcastically waving the tablet.

“This is good…” Nat glanced at the picture, her brows knitting together.

“No, it’s not good!” Banner shook his head as he rounded her chair

“No, Nat’s right, he’s showing us his hand, this isn’t his pattern” Katie nodded down to the tablet on the desk. “I mean why send a message when you’ve already given a speech?“ 

"Strucker knew something that Ultron wanted us to miss” Steve concluded.

“I bet he-” Natasha mumbled searching something on the computers. “Yeah, everything we had on Strucker’s been wiped.”

“And that’s good?” Banner asked, as everyone looked at him.

“Yes because he didn’t wipe everything” Tony said suddenly.

Moments later they were all in a room where a bunch of paper files were kept, files that had been rescued from SHIELD. They pulled the boxes containing information on Strucker and it seemed from most of them that he had gone rogue long before the events a few months prior.

“Strucker had a lot of friends.” Katie mumbled as besides her Thor was throwing random files across the room after deciding they were of no use.

“Well these people are all horrible.” Bruce commented digging through his own box.

“Wait,” Tony said pointing to the file Thor was flipping through. “I know that guy. From back in the day. He operates off the African coast. Black market arms.”

Steve stopped what he was doing to shoot Tony with a glare

“There are conventions. Alright?” Tony explained “You meet people. I didn’t sell him anything. He was talking about finding something new, a game-changer. It was all very Ahab”

“What’s this?” Thor questioned, pointing towards one of the pictures of the man Tony had found. I peered over at it too.

“Uh, it’s a tattoo, I don’t think he had it,” Tony said

“No, those are tattoos, this is a brand,” Thor corrected, pointing towards a spot on the man’s neck right underneath of his left ear which obviously was a mark that had been burned there as it still looked red and raw in the picture.

“Yeah,” said Bruce as he placed himself in front of the computer, quickly searching what the mark meant. “It’s a word in an African dialect meaning 'thief’. In a much less friendly way.”

“What dialect?” Steve asked.

“Uh, Wak- wakanada – Wakandan,” Bruce said jumbling the pronunciation a few times before getting it right.

Katie swallowed and looked at Tony. “Tony, if this guy got out of Wakanda with some of their trace goods…"

“I thought your father said he got the last of it,” Steve said, cottoning on.

“I don’t follow,” Bruce interjected. “What comes out of Wakanda?”

Steve, Katie and Tony all shared a look before Steve looked back at Bruce and stood to the side gesturing to his shield.

“The strongest metal on Earth”

*****

Ulysses Klaue’s warehouse was located in an old ship in a Salvage Yard off the African coast. Unfortunately Ultron, fresh from the murder of Strucker, had gotten there first, along with the Maximoffs

The fight had started, Katie and Tony both tangling in the air with Iron Legion bots and Ultron himself as everyone else took them out on the ground also trying to deal with the Maximoff twins, which was proving easier said than done.

"The girl tried to warp my mind,” Thor grunted, over the comms,“Take special care I doubt a human can keep her at bay, fortunately I am mighty.”

“Where is she?” Katie asked, looking round, her heat scanners showing her nothing.

“Thor?” Steve bellowed into his earpiece “Thor, do you read me?”

Thor didn’t answer.

Taking down another bot, Katie flew off down the hallway, in search of the god, but was knocked sideways by something into a pile of scrap metal. She stood up and prepared to take off again but, the world became dark, dim and gloomy. She paused, suddenly wary, trying to remember why she had come here in the first place.

She was in a church, at the end of the aisle. Steve was stood at the front, Bucky next to him. Both in smart suits. She frowned as she started to walk towards them when music started and everyone stood up. Katie was beyond confused, and she turned in the direction everyone was looking at to see Peggy Carter walking down the Aisle, in a beautiful white gown. She looked just as she did in the 40s photos Katie had seen.

But she didn’t belong like this, in the time. As Peggy glided past her, she turned to see Steve looking at the woman, his face smiling, features soft. And Katie felt he entire world collapse around her as Peggy reached the front of the aisle and Steve took her hands in his.

“Steve…” she managed to croak out. The Soldier looked at her from where he was stood and he smiled kindly at her.

“I hope you understand…”

“You love me.”  Katie choked out and Steve shook his head.

“You could never be enough.” He said, shrugging “I’m sorry. It’s her, it’s always been her. You were merely a welcome distraction”

“No, no…that’s not fair, you said I was, you said I was yours…” she cried, dropping to her knees as the world shook around her.

Steve had seen Katie get knocked sideways out of the air, and was heading down to help when suddenly, he felt cold. Everything in front of his eyes seemed so far away, and a wave of calm spread over him. There was no rush, was there?

He was in a ballroom in the 1940s, loud jazz music hit his ears and the sounds of people laughing and joking. He tentatively stepped forward through the crowd but flinched when an explosion flashed near him. No, not an explosion, a camera. Then there was a gunshot. No, not a gunshot, a bottle being uncorked. Confused he looked around and saw a man lying on the ground, his friend dabbing at blood on his shirt, but it wasn’t blood. Steve looked again and he saw it was red wine.

All around him, people were celebrating, but all he saw was war and death.

Then, a very familiar laugh made him turn and he saw his girl in a gorgeous pink dress and she was being spun round the dance floor by Bucky. His face was creased into a wide smile, both his arms intact as he whirled Katie around the floor. She looked the same as she always had, but…she didn’t belong in this time of his life.

“Are you ready for our dance?” another familiar voice spoke as a hand tapped his shoulder. He spun round to find Peggy stood there, in a blue dress, her outfit and hair and make-up belonged here, in the 40s, in his past, but Katie didn’t. His eyes turned back to Bucky and Katie who were now swaying slowly, foreheads pressed together and he could do nothing but stare as Bucky dropped a kiss to his girl’s lips.

Then he was dancing with Peggy, but he had to stop, this wasn’t right.

She was his girl, not Bucky’s. He was with her, not Peggy. He needed to get to Katie…

“What’s wrong?” Peggy asked him. “The war’s over Steve,“ she told him smiling, "all of them.” She added. “We can go home. Imagine it.”

The party in the ballroom stopped. Everyone disappeared and the room went deathly silent.

He gave a loud gasp, it felt like he had plunged into an icy lake. He blinked, resisting the urge to vomit, taking deep breaths and slowly everything came back into focus and then he remembered where he was and why. The fight, Ultron, the warning from Thor….and Katie, where was she? He staggered to his feet, and stumbling slightly set off to find her.

She wasn’t far away, she was knelt on a walkway just below him suffering the effects of her own vision. Steve swung down a level, gently landing in front of her and knelt down on all fours.

“Katie…”

She could hear a familiar voice talking, through the fog and suddenly it cleared as if someone had poured a bucket of iced water over her head. She blinked, before she let out a groan of pain and dropped forward, grasping at the rough metal of the walkway beneath her palms- somehow and for a reason she didn’t know, she was knelt on the floor on all fours, and no longer in her suit. Every inch of her body was aching and her head felt like it was full of cotton wool and horrible lights were flashing behind her eyeballs, like she had had the worst migraine ever.

“Hey, you’re alright…” Steve said as she sat back on her heels, his hands either side of her face as she drew her eyes up to look at us.

“You’re …” she reached out to touch his chest, feeling the roughness of his uniform under my skin. “You’re still with me?”

“Yeah, baby course I am.” He said, frowning slightly, wondering what the hell the Maximoff kid had forced her to see. Deciding there was plenty of time to discuss that later he waited with her quietly whilst her breathing began to even out. She let out another groan, scrunching her eyes shut as the pain behind her eyes became too much and she lurched sharply to the left, throwing up all over the metal walk way.

Steve gently rubbed her back as she retched again, groaning in pain.

“It’s ok…” he soothed gently “I got you…” Eventually she stopped and the throbbing in her temple subsided somewhat and she wiped my mouth, sitting back down on the floor harshly. “What happened?” she whispered.

“The Maximoff girl.” Steve said gently by means of an explanation, his hand reached round to gently stroke her hair.

“It was… it was so real.” She mumbled, glancing around.

“I know, tell me about It.” Steve swallowed, kissing her clammy forehead. Katie was surprised to find he was shaking slightly as well, drops of cold sweat were beaded across his brow “We need to get back to the ship. Can you stand?”

“Yeah” she said, and together they stood. Katie was a little bit shaky at first but Steve held her up and took a deep breath, shooting a furtive glance around.

“Clint?” Steve spoke in to the coms as Katie got back into her suit.

“Cap, you back with us?”

“Yeah, how is everyone?” He asked as they made their way slowly up the stairs. Katie didn’t trust herself to fly. Instead she kept the face plate open, needing the fresh air.

“Nat’s in a bad way, she’s still not out of it.”  Clint replied. “What about Nova?”

“I’m alright.” She said, shakily as they left the warehouse, blinking in the light of the sun, the light making her heave again and she bent over, emptying what little was left in her stomach on the floor. “Sorry…” she mumbled as she straightened up and turned to Steve who shook his head.

“Nothing to be sorry for, Doll.” He assured, looking at her, hands reaching out to gently stroke her face. He looked around and spoke, mopping at his brow. “Thor?”

“I’m here.” the God’s voice came, he also sounded shaky. “That witch, she warped my mind after all. Her power… I’ve never seen or felt anything like it.”

“Tony?” Steve asked as we set off walking, slowly, across the sandy stretch to where the jet was parked.

“She got to Banner.” Tony said over the coms. “And whatever she showed him… well, Hulk just levelled a local town…”

“Casualties?” Steve sighed, looking at Katie.

“I dare say a fair few.” Tony replied. “Veronica and I did our best.”

As they reached the jet Thor landed next to them bringing Clint who in turn was carrying Nat. It was clear to see that everybody, bar Clint was severely shaken. It was a blessing that at least one of them had presence of mind. Clint got the jet off the ground, tracked Tony’s whereabouts and helped get a semi-conscious Bruce settled while Tony took off the suit. It all seemed very distant to Katie and Steve, who both felt like they were watching the interior of the jet through a fog.

“It was always her,” Steve’s voice echoed in Katie’s ears, and it hurt, a deathly pain deep in her being. She tried to swallow, tried to breathe, but the sickening panic she had felt during her vision threatened to wash over her again. Besides her Steve wasn’t faring much better. Bucky dropped a kiss to his girl’s lips. He moved slightly in his seat. It was an involuntary move, almost like he had been startled by something, which he had been, and Katie spotted it. She unclipped her belt, stood up and gently sat on his lap, pressing her head into the crook of his neck, shivering. He pulled her closer, kissed the top of her head and the pair of them just stayed there, not a word uttered between them.

Katie fell asleep, and when she woke up it was dark through the front of the window, showing they’d crossed time-zones. She was still on Steve’s lap, his head was lolling against the head-rest of the chair, his arms still around her whilst he also slept. Gently she untangled herself from him, and stood up, stretching. Clint was still piloting the jet to wherever it was they were headed and Tony was looking at something on a tablet a few seats away.

“Hey kiddo.” He placed his arm round her as he settled into the seat next to him. “Feel better?”

She shrugged.

“Well you’re doing better than Nat” he said, and Katie looked over. She was sat, staring at the floor. Her eyes darting to the sides every so often.

“She still not come round?” Katie asked, laying her head on her brother’s shoulder.

“She’s with us. But she’s really shaken…hasn’t said a word.”

“Seems I got off relatively lightly” Katie mumbled as she glanced over at Steve who was still asleep.  

“Wanna talk about it?” Tony asked, his chin resting on her head.

“Erm… I saw Steve and Peggy” she muttered, looking down at her engagement ring, twirling it round her finger “it sounds silly but… they were getting married and I couldn’t understand why he wasn’t with me. Then he told me…” She trailed off, swallowing, she felt sick again.

“You know none of its true, right?” Tony said, his eyes locking onto hers “He loves you, not Peggy. The Maximoff brat is messing with your head.

 “I know…” The tears sprang forth into her eyes. “ But it was so real, physical, I could touch things and people. I can’t explain it.”

“You don’t need to…” Tony shook his head, gently reaching out and wiping her tears away with his thumb. “I had one, at Strucker’s base when we got the Sceptre.”

“I knew something else had happened to you” Katie sighed “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I thought it was just a funny turn but now I know it was her. I saw you all dead. I felt it. The whole world too. Because of me. I didn’t do enough.”

Katie slid her arms around him, pulling him into a hug.

“So that’s why you restarted the Ultron thing again” she said gently

“Yeah… really worked out that didn’t it.” He sighed.

“We’ll fix it.” Katie replied softly, shrugging as she sat up.

“How do you know?” Tony looked at her with eyes that were so like her father’s. She could do nothing but shrug back.

“Because we have to.”

*****

It was dawn as they all stepped off the jet and followed Clint as he confidently led them up to the porch of a large farmhouse, literally in the middle of a field. The sleep seemed to have done most people good, although Natasha was still not quite right, so Clint supported her as they walked up the path. Steve had his arm round Katie’s shoulder; hers in turn was round his waist, but not for support, for comfort.

“What is this place?” Thor asked looking around at the farmhouse and its surroundings.  

“A safe house?” Tony responded unsure.

“Let’s hope.” Clint opened the door and stepped inside, with everyone else curiously following close behind. “Honey? I’m home.”

To nearly everyone’s surprise, a woman, who Katie figured was Clint’s wife, walked out from the kitchen and into the living room. She had long brown hair and was holding a bunch of colouring books in one hand, but one thing that was hard to miss was that she was very pregnant.

“I brought company. Sorry I didn’t call ahead.” Clint told the woman as he walked up to her and gave her a kiss.

“This is an agent of some kind.” Tony muttered pointing at the couple.

“Guys, this is Laura.”

“Hi,” she greeted awkwardly, “I know all of your names.”

Tony not knowing how else to react just gave a small wave that was just as awkward.

“Oh, incoming!” Clint warned as the thudding of feet and loud voices of young children hit their ears. A boy and a girl hurried into the living room, both running over to Clint as they yelled “daddy”.

Steve’s face was a picture, despite herself Katie almost laughed at the genuine-fake shock he wore across his features.

“Hi sweetheart! Hey buddy!” exclaimed Clint while kissing the top of their heads. “How are you guys doing?”

“These are smaller agents.” Tony said, adding to his previous statement.

“Did you bring Aunty Nat?” the little girl questioned.

Nat stepped forward, suddenly finding her feet. “Why don’t you hug her and find out?”

“Sorry for barging in on you.” Steve said, always one for keeping his manners.

“Yeah we would have called ahead, but we were too busy having no idea you existed.” Tony remarked with his usual sarcasm. Katie shot him a look.

“Yeah well Fury helped me set this up when I joined.” Clint explained, his arm around his wife. “Kept it off SHIELD’s files and I’d like to keep it that way. I figured it’s a good place to lay low.”

Thor, who had been extremely quiet since arriving, made to step closer to the group but a loud crunching noise stopped him. Katie and Steve looked down and he raised his boot seeing the lego house he had just crushed. He glanced upwards and caught Steve’s eye, then Katie’s as he kicked the broken pieces underneath the table. Then a toaster popped and all 3 of them glanced at it, before Thor turned and hastily left the room. Katie looked at Steve and the pair of them followed Thor out.

“Thor,” Steve said, and he stopped dead.  

“I saw something, in that dream.” he explained. “I need answers, I won’t find them here.”

“Be careful” Katie said to him, he nodded and then with a whirl of his hammer he was gone.

They both turned to go back into the house when Steve stopped dead, the image of that damned vision flashing in front of his eyes.

“We can go home…imagine that”

He was home, with Katie, there was no home without her…

Katie, who had been heading back into the house, noticed Steve had stopped. She turned to look at him, his face was glazed slightly, a look on his face she knew extremely well, the one he got whenever he was thinking about his past.

“It’s always been her.”

Katie tried to ignore the flash back and gently spoke to him, her voice shaky.

“Steve?”

He suddenly focussed and looked at her, smiling softly.

“Walk with me?” he said, inclining his head away from the house.

Katie nodded with a swallow, taking his outstretched hand, the pair of them heading down a worn path through the field outside the house. Neither of them said a word for a while, they just walked taking in the large fields and the various trees and shrubs and they reached a clearing which was clearly where the family spent a lot of time. There was a picnic bench to the right of a large oak tree which sported an archery target, 3 arrows currently protruding from the middle circle. 2 bikes lay propped the trunk under the target and a baseball glove lay discarded on the floor.

Frankly Katie loved the levelheadedness of it. Steve loved the normality of it.

“You know, all I ever wanted was to join the army, hold down a good job, have a wife and a family…” Steve broke the silence as they both walked towards the bench. Katie looked up at him as he glanced around. “I mean a farm was never really what I imagined but…”

“A town house in Brooklyn?” She smiled softly as she took a seat.

Steve shrugged. “It doesn’t matter where, I just want to build a life with you, whatever madness that brings with it.”

Katie turned her face away, blinking away the tears. She knew her vision hadn’t been real, she knew it was all a dream but there was part of her that would never stop wondering, whether given the chance he would go back and live his life over with Peggy. Was he settling here for second best?

“Sweetheart?” Steve asked, his voice cracking slightly.

“I’m sorry just, she really did a number on me and now my head is all over and…” she looked at him as he moved so that he had one leg either side of the seat and he was turned side on to face her.

“What did she make you see?”

She took a deep breath and told him, by the time she got to the part about him saying she wasn’t enough and was a mere distraction, she was really biting back the sobs as Steve reached out and pulled her to him. She pressed her face into his chest, breathing him in, relishing his touch and the fact he was real, and there with her.

“Seems like she got us all pretty bad.” Steve said, his voice thick.

“What did you see?” Katie asked quietly.

“She showed me a dance.” He took a deep breath his arms still around her “But it was back in the 1940s. You, me, Peggy and Bucky were there.”

“Dancing?” she frowned “In the 1940s?”

“Yeah, I know. For once you were the one out of time.” He mused gently, looking at her for a second before he carried on “But you were dancing with Bucky, you were with Bucky, and I was with Peggy and she was telling me the war was over and that I could go home…”

“Maybe my vision wasn’t that far off after all.” Katie sniffed gently.

He pulled back from her slightly, and frowned. “What do you mean?”

“No matter how much I try to ignore it, how much I love you there’s always going to be part of you that’s back there, and a wishing you and Peggy had gotten your dance…”

Steve blew out a breath through his nose, shaking his head. She’d got this all wrong “Baby that’s not what I saw, at all…”

“You know sometimes I notice that look in your eyes, that haunted look like you’re somewhere else…” she continued, looking at her hands “I convince myself I’m seeing things because the thought that you might be wishing you could be elsewhere breaks my heart…”

“Baby, I-“

“If I am second best then, fine, I get it but I need to know….” she looked at him through her tears. “If you knew then, what you know now, and had the chance to… would you do things differently?”

He took a deep breath and moved slightly, reaching into his pocket for something. When he turned round Katie noticed he had the compass with Peggy’s photo inside it in his hands.

“You will never be second best.” He shook his head as he turned the compass over, in his hand. “That dream I had was awful.” He sighed “Not because Peggy was with me but because you weren’t.”

He clicked open his compass and passed it to her. The black and white picture of Peggy was gone, and inside was a photo she instantly recognised as one they’d gotten from a photo booth in Coney Island on her birthday last year. They were both looking cross eyed into the camera, happy and carefree, joking and playing. An hour or so post the photo being taken, he’d asked her to marry him.

“I changed it over the moment we got back that day.” He said gently, “I love that photo, it reminds me of just how much you make me smile and that I can just be me around you. I don’t have to be Cap or anyone else, just Steve.” HE reached out with his still gloved hand to brush her hair behind her ear. “You wanna know what my biggest fear is? Losing you.”

She glanced up at him, her eyes searching his but even as she did she knew he was telling the truth. Steve didn’t lie.

”That part of my life with Peggy is over, and it’s okay. I can live without it, but I cannot live without you.” He sighed, his voice slightly choked and he moved his hands up to wipe the tears off her cheeks that she wasn’t even aware she had shed. “So would I do things differently? Not one fucking second.” He gently pulled her face to meet his in a soft kiss and whispered. “Please believe me, kitten.”

“I do.” She nodded as her lips met his again, melting into his hold. She kissed him back, urgently, needy and he was happy to oblige, his arms wrapping round her, pulling her into him.

“Bet I look a right state.” She pulled away, her head resting against his. He chuckled slightly.

“Well we could both probably do with a shower.” HE nodded, looking up over at the house, “Why don’t you go back in? I’ll grab us some stuff from the jet.”

She nodded and he kissed her forehead once more as the two of them headed in opposite directions.  Steve watched her go heaving out another sigh as he stood up. Frankly it said something about their deep rooted issues that their visions took them both to losing one another to other people and not death. Especially after everything that had happed the last year and what was going on right around them now with Ultron. But it also made perfect sense, neither of them could face being without the other. They’d fallen in deep, real deep, and whilst in some ways it was frightening in others it was so, so right.

There was absolutely no doubt in his heart at all where Katie sat in his life. And that was forefront and centre. He just hope she realised that too.

By the time Steve had made it back she was already asleep on the bed in the spare room Clint had directed him to. Dropping the bag gently to the floor so as not to disturb her he headed into the bathroom and stripped off out of his suit. He lay his forehead against the cool tiles, the warm water was soothing as he washed away the grime of the fight. He dried off, changed into a pair of jeans and an under-armour shirt and headed back into the bedroom. Katie was still out of it, and deciding that a nap seemed like a damned good idea he slipped onto the bed besides her. Sliding one arm underneath her he pulled her back so her back was pressed into his chest, his other arm gently draped over her, his hand tangling with hers.

“I love you so fucking much.” He mumbled into her neck as he closed his eyes “So much.”

***** Chapter 24 Part 1

**Original Posting**

[scottspack]

SO YOU JUST FINISHED THE UNTAMED AND YOU WANT TO READ SOME FIC

Congratulations Jen @jlf23tumble on finishing The Untamed (tomorrow)! Now that you’re done with the show (tomorrow), you can finally dive into the wide and wonderful world of untamed fic!!! I’m ecstatic to be personally curating your reading experience! LET’S BEGIN!

I’ve started off with a list of 5 fics I think you should read in this specific order to 1. get some resolution from the end of the show and 2. get you acclimated to untamed fics! Then, I’ve listed a bunch of fics in different categories for your perusal to read at your leisure! This is an unbelievably long post holy shit brace yourself.

I’m like fairly certain that all of these follow the tv show canon BUT also its very typical for authors to combine many aspects of all of the different forms of canons to their liking. Therefore, I feel like I need to give a quick explanation of a couple things from the novel that show up frequently in fics that idk if you know already or not:

In the book, when Wei Wuxian is resurrected, he is brought back in Mo Xuanyu’s actual body and has his face and everything. Mo Xuanyu was pretty young when he died, I wanna say maybe 17 or 18??? and he was also short and pretty and flamboyantly gay. This is where the references to their crazy height difference come from, but again, I think I tried to include mostly fics that skew more heavily to the tv version where WWX keeps his same body and he and LWJ are more evenly matched physically.

Its novel canon that LWJ smells like sandalwood incense and has golden colored eyes. This is mentioned in like almost every single wangxian fic ive ever read, even if the author said they were strictly adhering to show canon lol

At the end of the novel wangxian run away together and elope! Obviously in the show that’s not how it goes down, but I think a couple of the fics I’ve recced might mention it in passing. (Oh also when they elope they make a pact to fuck “everyday,” a concept that might be mentioned as well.

Obviously, we have to kick it off with some fics that both reunite wangxian and give more resolution to the actual show. If you’re like me, it both took you a while to get all the way through the show AND took 100% of your brain power to remember all of the characters and plot lines. If that’s that case: these fics should be helpful in serving as a kind of emotional refresher for the show to wrap up some loose ends and to dive deeper into some of the things the show glosses over for one reason or another!

1. A Lot of Edges Called Perhaps by hansbekhart (Wangxian, E, 21k) 

The funny part is - and it is a little funny, even if Wei Wuxian has no one left to share the joke with - they never have. Not anything. He has never kissed any part of Lan Zhan besides his slim hands; never been even partially undressed with him anywhere besides a miserable, xuanwu-infested cave. It’s always been like this between them, this simmering need, this desperate understanding: a knowledge so deep that it lives somewhere in his bones, that if he wanted to have Lan Zhan he could have him, and if Lan Zhan wanted Wei Wuxian he could have that too. But they never have.

I found this fic on someone’s blog when they said that it was the definitive fic to read directly after finishing the series so i saved it, read it directly after finishing the series, and felt COMPLETE. Beautifully written, seamlessly fits with canon, and has a super fulfilling resolution. The perfect way to kick off reading untamed fic!

2. One Rogue Spark In My Direction by hansbekhart (Lan Wangji/Xiao Xingchen/Song Lan, E, 5k)

He’d thought, in Yueyang, that they’d seen something in each other, something familiar. That maybe they’d recognized something in him. But it’s been many years, and many things have happened since, and he’s guessed wrongly at other people’s hearts before. Lan Wangji looks back down at the table, at his steaming, bitter tea. He’ll beg if he has to.

In “A Lot Of Edges Called Perhaps” Wangji mentions that he has had sex before and this is the in-universe story of that time and WHEW BABY!!!! AHHHHHH!!! While this fic is like, almost pure smut, I think there is a ton of value to it in terms of emotional perspective on how fucked up LWJ was after WWX’s death. Also, it’s very hot.

3. Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Laz Sizhui & Lan Wangji, G, 19k)

Later, when he’s older, it’s this that A-Yuan will remember most: the stretch of silence, the two of them both dirty and shaking with fever, as he looked at Brother Rich, and Brother Rich looked back at him.

This is a fic about Lan Wangji raising Sizhui from when he rescues Sizhui from the Burial Mounds until they bring WWX back to the Cloud Recesses after he’s resurrected. It made me cry about 18 times and I consider it fully canon in relation to the show. I think this gives a lot of emotional depth to the Wangji/Sizhui family relationship that is very important in most fics, so this acts as a good base since the show doesn’t really talk about it too much.

4. Your Name, Safe In Their Mouth by astrolesbian (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, G, 10k)

“You’ve got a fever,” Wei Wuxian says soothingly. “You just keep still as well as you can. We’ll have you fixed up soon.”

Lan Sizhui recognizes his tone—this is the voice that Wei Wuxian uses on hurt people and young children, a very calm and no-nonsense voice that has none of the mischief and cheer of the way he sounds the rest of the time. Lan Sizhui looks up and meets his eyes, and they are dark, stormy gray, muddled and concerned.

“I’m all right,” he croaks.

“Hush,” Wei Wuxian says, in a low croon, like someone quieting a baby. Then he blinks, and looks away, awkward. “I mean—you shouldn’t speak. You’re tired. Rest if you need to.”

or: lan sizhui gets sick on a night hunt. wei wuxian comforts him. they both have a lot of feelings about it.

The Wei Wuxian and Sizhui bonding fic that I so desperately desperately needed to read. Since we got the emotional depth to Wangji/Sizhui in the last fic, here’s some emotional resolution for Sizhui and his other dad!!!!!!!!!! Scratched the very particular itch of “but have they REALLY talked about what it means that they’re reunited after 16 years???”

5. climbing up that coastal shelf by Sour_Idealist (Jin Ling, Jiang Cheng, & Wei Wuxian, T, 15k)

Jin Ling had begun to suspect years ago that there were parts of his family history that had been crossed out; long streaks of black where Wei Wuxian had been. The truth is more like whole books being brought up from their hiding places again.

Or: Jin Ling tries to figure out what family means, now.

OKAY!!!! Last emotional resolution before I send you on your way to explore! This is the emotional resolution for the other half of WWX’s family. Featuring just a FUCK TON of family feels and a lot of TALKING that this fucked up family needs so damn bad. *chefs kiss* muy delicioso! ALSO i think this is a good introduction to a lot of the naming conventions that are used frequently in untamed fic that took me a while to pick up on!

WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now that you’ve gotten some post-show catharsis in the form of a few extremely well-written fics, it’s time for a full rec! I’ve divided it up into seven categories: long fics, smutty one-shots, 3zun (lan xichen/nie mingjue/meng yao) fics, fics about the juniors, family fun fics, some miscellaneous fics, and then some yizhan RPF! I wouldn’t have put any of these fics on here if I didn’t think they were worth reading, BUT! I did mark my particular favorites with asterisks to demark the crème de la crème of the bunch. SO! LET’S DIVE IN!

EPIC TALES (LONG AND/OR IMMERSIVE)

My Age Has Never Made Me Wise by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 63k) ***

“We hear that His Excellency might be married by summer’s end,” the merchant’s wife says and Wei Wuxian freezes, his heart in his throat. “The Gusu Lan sect has been buying enough red silk and brocade that the merchants in Caiyi can’t satisfy the demand.”

He feels himself grow brittle inside, like a flick of a finger to his temple might make him shatter. His ears are ringing.

“Who’s the lucky bride?” he asks despite himself. His tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth.

Or: The story of a marriage.

I LOVE THIS FIC. YOU MUST PROMISE ME YOU’LL READ THIS FIC. The absolute best kind of slow burn and I think such an extremely accurate representation of the canon material. I’m always surprised by the authors in this fandom’s ability to write shit that is so concretely grounded in the universe. This could and should be a real companion novel. Amazing. I love it. (Also I know you said you’re not into fics that are long just to be long and I think this fic is the exact opposite of that, it’s long but for good reason and has such an insanely satisfying payoff that it’s completely worth dedicating a few hours to!)

The Year of Drought by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 24k)

Wei Ying could not be contained by the walls of the Cloud Recesses, alive again and overflowing with it, bursting like a dam in spring with the force of two lives unspent. And so he had to go. Lan Wangji understands that—he understood it when Wei Ying told him of his plans, looking at Lan Wangji above the rim of his cup with an apologetic smile, like craving freedom was something to apologize for.

Wei Ying would go, and Lan Wangji would see him off; this has always been the only way it could be.

Or: In the absence of Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji waits.

The previous fic but from Wangji’s perspective. Absolutely required reading if you read the other one. Wangji baby.......i love you.....

further than the grave by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 32k)

There is something about grief that turns Lan Wangji numb. He cannot be certain if it is not some kind of defect inside him that makes him so. But just as he grieved his mother’s passing with dry eyes and a stone in his chest, so he grieves Wei Ying: quietly, frozen inside, without tears. Beyond the Jingshi window it might be spring, but Lan Wangji’s body and mind are still held within the winter’s grasp.

As the anniversary of his leaving seclusion approaches, Lan Wangji ponders the nature of grief and healing.

One last fic from the same verse as the previous two, this talks about Wangji post-WWX’s death and then them dealing with the past post-marriage. Its just as good and immersive and amazing as the previous two parts, but this is the only untamed fic that actually made me gasp out loud and if you read this and can guess what it was we will be best friends forever. (There are two other fics in this verse that are also good but these three in particular are god-tier in my eyes.)

Vagabond by xantissa (Wangxian, E, 66k)

Wei Wuxian comes back to Cloud Recesses after a year of wandering the world, hoping to start a relationship with Lan Zhan. He doesn’t expect to come into the middle of a case of sleeping sickness mysteriously killing people, nor does he expect what follows, putting everything he holds dear on the line once again.

OOOWEE CASE FIC! CASE FIC! This is truly the twisty turny intense and INTERESTING type of fic from this fandom that blows my mind. This could fully be a stand alone novel its that good and there’s that much to it. Another one that isn’t long just to be long, it has so much PLOT!!!!! REAL GOOD SHIT!

Seldom All They Seem by Fahye (Wangxian, E, 25k)

or, one hundred and thirty-three principles of the Gusu Lan, pertaining to the state of marriage

***

He bows to Wei Wuxian, sword in hand, sleeves falling properly. Wei Wuxian bows in return, and the sect leaders begin the opening courtesies, and for all of ten minutes Lan Wangji is under the impression that he is betrothed to a boy who is perfectly normal and acceptable apart from an unfortunate tendency to fidget with his clothes.

That impression does not last.

A canon-divergent fic exploring “what if Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian were betrothed from when they were young like Yanli and Jin Zixuan?” It’s extremely good and very compelling and also made me cry multiple times. (The confrontation in the rain doesn’t get any easier even if they’re betrothed!)

Half Cloak & Half Dagger by Fahye (Lan Xichen/Meng Yao, E, 13k)

Jin Guangyao lifts his head and smiles. "I'm considering a problem."

"Can I be of any assistance with it?"

He drops a kiss on Lan Xichen's chest. With the nail of one finger he lightly traces the characters for irony on Lan Xichen's side. "Not this one, er-ge."

A follow-up fic set in the “Seldom All They Seem” universe but focused on xiyao. Has hands down the best written characterization of meng yao in any fic ive read so far. I continuously come back to this fic just to read the absolutely genius way this author writes the Head Bitch In Control of the cultivation world.

The Absolutely True Story of the Yiling Patriarch: A Manifesto in Many Parts by aubreyli (Wangxian, T, 20k)

Wei Wuxian’s hand jolts, spilling a drop of wine onto the tabletop. “Love?” he croaks, then clears his throat and tries again. “Lan Zh— uh, Hanguang-jun, in love?”

“Have you not heard the story?” the other young woman asks, looking pitying. “You must, it is a truly heartrending tale of star-crossed romance and mutual pining — go to any storyhouse in town, everyone has been requesting a reading of this book.”

“There’s a book?” Wei Wuxian says blankly.

In which the junior disciples (namely, Lan Jingyi, Ouyang Zizhen, and a reluctant Lan Sizhui) turn to RPF in an attempt to rehabilitate Wei Wuxian's reputation so that he and Hanguang-jun can get together and get married and live happily ever after. It's... surprisingly effective.

I kept avoiding this fic, even though it was really high up on the list of most popular fics in the fandom, bc the premise sounded pretty goofy BUT I finally bit the bullet one day and AHHHHHHHH!!!!! Very very very cute and fun, made me smile like an idiot throughout the entire thing. Heartwarming and very well written!!!

never let me go by yiqie (Wangxian, E, 69k)

Wei Wuxian has certainly hoped so ardently in his two lifetimes, for so many different things, in so many different ways, that he could have summoned the demon to his front door with his bare hands. His eyes wander to Lan Zhan, settle on the back of his head, the blue-black curtain of his hair. Oh, how he has hoped.

Another extremely good and super immersive case fic. If you ever just want to sink really deep into an untamed fic, this is a great one for it.

hunters seeking solid ground by Attila (Wangxian, E, 24k)

“Hanguang-jun,” Wei Wuxian repeats. His heart clenches. He wants—but he’d really meant to have this nightmare stuff down before they met again, so he wouldn’t find himself relying on Lan Wangji’s nearness. He’s not supposed to go back yet. But he’s so tired, and his will crumbles. “Yeah,” he says. “All right. Take me back to Gusu with you.”

You want hurt/comfort? I gotcha hurt/comfort RIGHT HERE!

shadows in the sun rise by Yuu_chi (Wangxian, E, 25k) ***

“Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji says, voice slow and a pitch too quiet. A second later Wei Wuxian understands why. “I cannot hear.”

Or; Lan Wangji is cursed into internal isolation. Their ability to understand one another remains as unwavering as ever.

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD. I have been thinking about this fic nonstop since I read it. It is…..fucking incredible. One of the best qualities of wangxian is that they’re so in tune with each other and able to work so cohesively with little communication and this fic is like “what if we take that and DIAL IT UP TO ELEVEN” and i was like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I hope that you will come and meet me by feyburner (Wangxian, M, 28k) ***

The second time Lan Zhan said Wei Ying, come back, Wei Wuxian did.

okay so this is literally getting added to the fic rec one day before i send it to you because i just finished it and WHEW BABY!!!!! YES it is just another wangxian post-canon reunion get-together fic, BUT 1. i cant get enough of that specific brand of fic and 2. ITS SO GOOD. ITS. SO. GOOD. achingly tender and incredibly soft but also funny and sweet and very in-character! i love it!

THE BONE ZONE (WANGXIAN SMUT)

Sweet Night by corteae (Wangxian, E, 10k)

It was like coming back to life again, like being restitched into existence, cell by cell, nerve by nerve. From the surface of his skin to the marrow of his bones, everything new and purposeful. Like being pulled back from oblivion into an embrace of pure light. A feeling of absolute asylum.

That’s what it felt like, to realize Lan Wangji was in love with him.

An in-show au of “what if they just admitted they’re in love and fucked during episode 43?” Soft and romantic and hot!

the crucial point by dissembler (Wangxian, E, 7k) ***

Months after parting on the mountain, Lan Wangji makes up his mind, plots his course on a map, and has faith.

I LOVE THIS FIC! Very realistic and sweet wangxian reunion fic from wangji’s perspective. Has so many good little details and is very true to their characters. Good shit. Great.

Stainless by Fahye (Wangxian, E, 6k)

"I'm starting to feel," says Lan Xichen, "that this was a counterproductive suggestion."

Wei Wuxian looks down onto the pristine, tranquil cold springs of the Cloud Recesses. Sitting in the water, their bare shoulders rising like dumplings carefully spaced in a steaming-basket, are a large number of Lan disciples.

"They seem to be doing better," he says, encouragingly. "If they--oh, no, I see what you mean."

At the near bank, someone has pressed someone else against the rocks and is kissing them frantically.

What is getting into a new pairing if not an excuse to read sex pollen in new and exciting ways!

To Recklessly Confess by la_dissonance (Wangxian, E, 8k)

Lan Wangji has a fantasy. Wei Wuxian gets several clues.

The “what if they just fucked in episode 43” au but from a different angle.

all the depths of me, real by northofallmusic (Wangxian, E, 15k)

Wei Wuxian is dealing with a curse a little worse than he'd like to let on, and Lan Zhan is a little less than willing to let it slide.

Another “what if they just fucked in the show” fic, this time set when WWX has the curse on his leg and Wangji has to carry him back to the inn. 

Every Day, Learning More by phnelt (Wangxian, E, 6k)

The pink was high on Wei Wuxian’s cheeks. “I mean I haven’t been able to… that I can’t. Not without you.”

Lan Wangji stared. “In this body, the whole time you’ve had it -- you’ve never…”

Wei Wuxian kicked his heels into Lan Wangji’s back. “I just said that!”

I knew at least one of these was more book verse than show! WWX hasn’t been able to jerk off in his new body, LWJ helps him out :-)

the meaning of the ritual by newamsterdam (Wangxian, E, 8k)

“Lan Zhan… wants to bed me?”

The hand on his chest is shaking, slightly. “Mn.”

“Oh,” Wei Wuxian breaths out.

There’s something— something powerful, about that. Lan Wangji wants to bed him. Lan Wangji wants to sleep with him. Lan Wangji wants to touch him, and kiss him. The immovable, implacable Second Master of Lan, with a face and principles both carved from jade, wants him.

“Is this a fantasy of yours?” Wei Wuxian asks. “Forcing all the demonic energy out of me with your—”

Lan Wangji claps a hand over his mouth. “Silence, now.”

When the entire cultivation world turns against the Yiling Patriarch, Wei Wuxian makes a risky gamble— he'll agree to participate in an ancient ritual for cleansing the spirit, so that his character can no longer be called into question. The catch? He has no idea who his partner for the ritual will be.

This is also book-verse! As the tag says “Let Lan Wangji Fuck the Yiling Patriarch”!!!!!!!!!!!

Hurricane by gdgdbaby (Wangxian, E, 6k) ***

"Haven't you heard?" Nie Huaisang replied, clicking his tongue, though he was clearly pleased that he could be the one to break the news. He leaned in to announce with a dramatic flourish: "Lan Wangji just took emergency family leave this past weekend."

WANGXIAN AS SPIRK STAR TREK PON FAR AU!!!!!!!!!!!!! WEEWOO WEEWOO WEEWOO!!!!!!!! This was actually recced to ME by CHI and I have not stopped thinking about this fic for a full month. It’s like author gdgdbaby sat down one day and was like “Tumblr user Liv Scottspack deserves everything she wants in this life.” and then wrote this fic. Thank you author gdgdbaby, I love you.

WORLD’S WORST THROUPLE (3ZUN)

The body is a blade by rheawrites (3zun, E, 2k) ***

In which Lan Xichen is taken by surprise, Nie Mingjue takes what he can get, and Meng Yao gets what he wants.

This was the first 3zun fic I ever read and whew baby, got it in one! It’s actually a slight AU but it gets their characterization so right and is a very fun read. One of those fics I go back to frequently because it does so much with so few words.

shang tiantang by fuckwarlock (3zun, E, 4k)

They wanted so much, and with the way A-Yao gasps at the saber-calloused hand unfastening his belts, he does, too. The night air twirls with the scents of osmanthus and cinnamon and melon. Lan Xichen smiles, leans in, and ghosts his lips over the crook of A-Yao’s neck. What kind of brother would he be if he didn’t give A-Yao what he wanted? “I think it’s your turn to ascend, A-Yao.”

The Venerated Triad celebrates the Mid-Autumn Festival the best way they know how.

Truly the only way the venerated triad works is if meng yao gets Destroyed :-)

Favour and Fate by soulgusttheguardian (3zun, E, 8k)

There have been times in Meng Yao’s life when he couldn’t help but wonder how he came to be in his current situation. Found himself reflecting on the choices leading up to whatever misfortune had befallen him that day, and pondering why fate hated him so.

Granted, there had also been times when he couldn't help but wonder just what he had done to earn the favour necessary to be rewarded with certain things...

The current situation he found himself to be in, however, was definitely the latter.

More of the same! Truly I personally can never get enough of the 3zun dynamic in smut fics its just too goddamn motherfucking GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

the stars do not take sides by everyearning (3zun, E, 4k)

Mingjue isn’t sure he’s ever seen Xichen do anything other than treat the boy like a porcelain doll and it’s laughable to him, to think of Meng Yao as something breakable, instead of the sharp, deadly object he is.

Okay one last “Destroy Meng Yao” 3zun fic! Enjoy!

never as alive as we are right now by ThirtySixSaveFiles (3zun, E, 12k)

Three perspectives on three sworn brothers, at three different times in their relationship.

(Or, three times 3zun got it on and some of the feelings they had along the way.)

Wait actually I want to end the 3zun fics on this one because it has true Emotional Resolution at the end and I think they deserve a little healing.

BABY BOYS. BABIES. (THE JUNIORS)

A Civil Combpaign by Ariaste (Jin Ling/Lan Sizhui, T, 20k) ***

“And,” said one of the pompous ministers, “there’s the matter of a marriage to consider as well!”

Jin Ling, who at the beginning of that sentence had expected to slam into the very last wall of his patience and lose his temper entirely, paused. “A what?”

Thing was… it wasn’t such a bad idea.

A MUST-FUCKING-READ!!! Jin Ling gets it in his head that as sect leader he should get married and sets his sights on Lan Sizhui. I cannot stress enough how FUCKING CUTE this fic is!!! Sizhui being the best boy! Jin Ling having more uncles than he knows what to do with! Jiang Cheng being the worst at relationship advice! It’s so fucking good it love it so much.

Anyway, Here’s Wuji by kakikaeru (Lan Jingyi/Lan Sizhui, T, 18k)

The melody gets a little clearer when he breaks out of the trees, and Jingyi changes course with certainty, barreling down the back hill and through the Cloud Recesses, dodging scandalized disciples left and right. He throws open the doors to the Receiving Hall without announcement and bows nearly double, eyes on the floor instead of on the shocked faces of the Mei delegation and the impenetrable gaze of the Chief Cultivator.

"Forgive this disciple," Jingyi shouts, because he's going to get punished for rule breaking regardless. "From the back hill, Hanguang-jun, there is a song in the wind!"

Lan Jingyi comes of age.

A Jingyi-central fic about Jingyi growing up and falling in love and being a hero and being the second best boy of my heart right after Sizhui. Not only is this fic sweet and romantic but it’s another one that explores a lot of interesting things within canon and all of the supporting characters are written very well and are just as interesting as second best boy Jingyi.

Ok, JiuJiu by kakikaeru (Jin Ling/Ouyang Zizhen, T, 16k)

Uncle's jaw works in the way that suggests he's about to say something irredeemable. Jin Ling, in a move of diplomacy he hopes the Chief Cultivator appreciates, distracts him with spicy food and his favourite subject: the incompetence of his own officials.

"I hear the lakes in the south east are having drainage problems?" he asks nonchalantly, sticking three big slices of braised pork belly into his Uncle's bowl.

Jin Ling just wants to get through the Discussion Conference with his Sect, his dignity, and his heart intact.

A follow up fic to “Anyways, Here’s Wuji.” I LOVE the Jin Ling/Ouyang Zizhen dynamic of Jin Ling having been raised by Jiang “I keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die” Cheng AND being hopelessly charmed and smitten with Ouyang “President of the I Love Love Romance Novel Book Club” Zizhen! I LOVE IT! EXTREMELY CUTE!

Lan Sizhui's Guide to Courtship by Kimblydot (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, T, 23k)

In which Jingyi is a little oblivious, Sizhui is patient (and should have said something in the beginning), and everyone else is resigned to watching them dance around each other for far longer than necessary.

(Or: five things Sizhui tries to do in his courtship, and the one time Jingyi realizes there was one happening in the first place.)

I’ll stop describing fics about the juniors as being “cute” when they stop being SO FUCKING CUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

His Merit All My Fear by violettressed (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, G, 16k)

It’s too late for any of Hanguang-Jun’s rabbits to be awake -- one of the sundown chores for young disciples is to herd them back into their hutch -- but the rabbit field is as good a spot as any for quality sulking, so Lan Jingyi makes his way there.

Someone has beat him to it.

Lan Jingyi stares at Hanguang-Jun. Hanguang-Jun stares passively back.

When Lan Sizhui is swept away with the Ghost General, off on a new adventure, Lan Jingyi is the one who returns to Cloud Recesses alone.

Not only another extremely cute Sizhui/Jingyi fic BUT one that includes a Wangji/Jingyi friendship??? Incroyable! *chefs kiss*

spirit running wild by idrilka (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, E, 17k)

He doesn’t know, exactly, when the friendship he shared with Sizhui over the years has changed into something that’s made Jingyi finally understand why Hanguang-Jun always wears that expression whenever he looks at Senior Wei. There hasn’t been one single moment that he can point to and say, yes, this is where it started, because the thing about falling in love with your best friend is that it happens gradually, until it’s impossible to tell which step has been the deciding one.

Jingyi goes to Baling with a crush.

Written by the same genius that wrote the first three fics I made you read so you know it’s good. Its truly the childhood best friends to lovers of it all! Sizhui is adorable and Jingyi is a mess! *muah!*

FAMILY FUN TIME (NO ROMANCE, JUST FEELS)

Grow by cafecliche (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, T, 14k)

“Okay,” Jingyi says, as Sizhui puzzles this out aloud. “Okay! So the demon has been turning its victims into children.”

“I think so,” Sizhui says.

“To make them easier prey,” Jingyi says.

“Yes,” Sizhui says.

“So—” Jingyi’s voice cracks here, “this kid is Senior Wei.”

Wei Wuxian, still tangled in his own massive robes, blinks politely at them.

(Or: Wei Wuxian is cursed on a night-hunt, and the junior quartet rapidly finds themselves in over their heads.)

What I expected to be a goofy, silly fic turned out to be extremely emotional and made me FULLY CRY! It’s a very moving fic about Sizhui coming to understand himself and Wei Wuxian a lot better AND features all of the juniors arguing over who’s turn it is to hold 6 year old Wei Wuxian. A true win/win of a fic.

To The Act of Making Noise by words-writ-in-starlight (Lan Sizhui & Lan Wangji, G, 19k)

His father in white plays the song late into the night, and when A-Yuan wakes up confused and afraid, the guqin lulls him back to sleep.

Lan Sizhui hears his father play the same song every night for his whole life, and never, ever get an answer.

Another very moving and heartwarming fic about Lan Wangji raising Sizhui and Sizhui figuring out Wangji’s past and then eventually reconnecting with Wei Wuxian. It’s cute and soft and Sizhui is my best boy!

History (Proud To Call Your Own) by words-writ-in-starlight (Wen Ning, G, 5k)

“A-Yuan? Um—Lan-gongzi,” Wen Ning corrects, trying to set a good example. The children are young, seven and eight, exactly a dozen of them lined up in two crisp lines of tiny blue and white robes. Wen Ning can feel them staring at him, even though most of them have already mastered that Lan trick of neutrality. The smallest, a little girl with liquid dark eyes, is clinging to her nearest shijie’s sleeve and half-hiding. “Can I—what can I do for you?”

Wen Ning gets himself recruited for services, while he and Sizhui are visiting Cloud Recesses. Wei Wuxian gets a fan club.

Set in the same universe as “To The Act of Making Noise,” a very cute fic about Wen Ning finding his place in the post-canon world and being proud of Sizhui and being the world’s best substitute teacher. As the official Wen Ning Fan Club President, I had to include this.

the stone-filled sea by yukla (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, T, 9k) ***

He forgets how quickly Wei-qianbei changes faces, sometimes. Like pulling a theater mask over a bruise—color over color, a diversion with the swipe of his hand.

Lan Sizhui navigates a world that hates his father, one endless wave at a time.

Oh man oh man. I will never get enough of the fics where Sizhui (and the rest of the juniors) get ANGRY on Wei Wuxian’s behalf!! That’s their dad and their teacher and their friend and they will DEFEND HIM!!! YEAH BAYBEEEEEEEEEE!!!

PICK & MIX (MISCELLANEOUS)

This Side of Paradise by greenfionn (Wei Wuxian/Wen Qing, E, 3k)

Wei Wuxian does some very quick math in his head that goes something like this: He is pretty sure he’s in love with Lan Zhan - Lan Zhan is not here and likely never will be here - Wen Qing is here, not to mention very hot and let us not forget, actually interested in sex with him - there’s a solid chance he goes genuinely crazy or dies, or both, in the next few months and really, who wants to die a virgin?

Listen.......the fic premise is “Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing, noted bisexuals, figure life sucks enough at the Burial Mounds, they might as well have any fun they can before they die” and........I Am Looking Directly At It. It features Wen Qing bossing Wei Wuxian around and Wei Wuxian’s canon he-wants-to-be-pregnant kink. It’s........I liked it.

palm to palm is holy palmers’ kiss by iodhadh (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, M, 15k) ***

The realization strikes Song Lan like a bolt of lightning: Xiao Xingchen laughs, and he wants with a sudden, stunning desperation to kiss the mirth from his beautiful mouth. How, precisely, he is meant to manage that—that, he has no idea at all.

Or: introspective meditations on touch, trust, and the problem of desire.

I Am Baby and for some reason cannot handle how sad the entire Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen storyline ended up so I rarely read songchen fics, and when I do they’re always soft pre-canon fics like this one. Luckily there are some very beautiful and moving pre-canon songchen fics!!! I love you fandom!!

purpose and ritual by iodhadh (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, E, 8k)

Song Zichen has beautiful hands. He's a powerful swordsman, strong and skilled, unfairly impressive and unreasonably handsome. He is devoted and self-disciplined and he takes direction like a dream. And he doesn't touch people—no one at all, if he can help it, except for Xiao Xingchen.

The poets might call him a saint, but Xiao Xingchen is so very, very human.

More of the same :-)

born to sweet delight by la_dissonance (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, E, 10k)

Xiao Xingchen lightly jumps into the center of the pool, the water a shock that cools his sticky, heated skin, and does nothing for the heat building inside him. When he surfaces, pushing the hair out of his face, he finds Song Lan's gaze and meets it. Between them, everything goes both ways. What Song Lan will offer, Xiao Xingchen will freely give too.

Or, Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan meet, pledge their lives to each other, and then fall in love.

This is about the angstiest I will go for songchen and its still absolutely Baby Soft lmfao!!!!!!

Pin it down by rheawrites (Jiang Yanli/Jin Zixuan, Jin Zixuan/Nie Mingjue, E, 2k)

“Yanli, I did not lie on our wedding night. You are the only woman I have gone to bed with. But… there was a man.”

“Oh?” Yanli blinks up at him. She does not appear horrified, or betrayed, which is surely a good sign.

Jin Zixuan swallows. “It was Sect Leader Nie,” he says quickly, as though that will make it easier.

“…Oh,” says Yanli, and her eyes are dark.

-

Jin Zixuan tells his wife a war story. Or, two thousand words of Jin Zixuan getting railed.

Have you ever looked at Jin Zixuan and been like “I bet that mf likes getting PEGGED!!!!!!!!” Well here’s the fic for you. 

*YIBO VOICE* DIDI LOVES YOU! (YIZHAN RPF)

never really over by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 10k)

The thing is: it would be good to see Xiao Zhan again — if Yibo could just trust himself to be normal.

Author gdgdbaby is the yizhan master, so here are five of my personal favorites of their fics, starting with this post-filming reunion fic that was the first yizhan fic I ever read and HIT real good after having just finished the show myself.

pedagogy by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 17k) ***

Yibo opens his mouth and says, "I want to learn," barreling past the rapid rise of Xiao Zhan's eyebrows. "To last longer. Will you teach me?"

Quick-fire Yibo comes too easily and Xiao Zhan helps train him to last longer :-)

you’re the reason that i just can’t concentrate by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 10k)

Xiao Zhan hears about it from Yu Bin, which probably should've been the first warning sign.

Yibo was only 20 when they filmed the untamed, which lends itself perfectly to fics like this.

a truth so loud you can’t ignore by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 5k)

It's their last day of filming in Hengdian when the secret comes out.

If yibo has to be a fictional virgin than SO DOES XIAO ZHAN!

if you would only let you by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 32k) ***

"Well?" Yibo demands. Past the severe frown tugging at the corners of his mouth, a flicker of the old him slips through, the persistent boy who shoved his way into Xiao Zhan's space without a second thought and made a home for himself there. "Are you coming or not?"

Xiao Zhan's heart twists. He forcibly settles it back in his chest. He's only told Yibo no once in his entire life, and it was already the hardest thing he's ever had to do. "Okay," Xiao Zhan murmurs, quiet but decisive, and thumbs his phone off. "Let's go."

Like I said, all gdgdbaby fics are incredibly good, super well written, and very hot, but this one does stand out from the bunch for being a Full Epic Romance! This is one of Chi’s favorite fics so that should speak to it’s quality!

baby, who’s counting by nobirdstofly (Yizhan, E, 12k)

Xiao Zhan gasps, trying to rein in another peal of giggles. “What do I owe you anyway?”

Yibo shrugs one shoulder, and his smirk deepens. “Haven’t decided.”

Xiao Zhan’s still staring at him, laughter gone in his dry throat, when he hears someone yell for a reset. Yibo’s eyes are so, so dark, and he hasn’t stopped watching Xiao Zhan this whole time. Xiao Zhan swallows, nods, and pushes every dirty thought out of his head.

(Or: Yibo bets Xiao Zhan he'll break first during a take, Xiao Zhan loses, and it's all downhill from there.)

Ah sex bets, who doesn’t love sex bets!

Mystery Dance by mrsronweasley (Yizhan, E, 16k)

"That? That's your confession?" Yibo's toppled onto Xiao Zhan's side and is clutching his shoulder, trying not to fall over. "That's pathetic!"

"Oh, what, you can do better?" Zhuocheng is pretty flushed and there's a challenge in his voice that Yibo just can't walk away from.

"Hell yeah, I can. Hit me, Yu Bin." Yu Bin cheers and refills Yibo's shot glass. "All right!" Yibo downs the shot, gags only slightly, and says, "Everyone! I'm a fucking virgin!"

WHAT’S better than a Yibo virgin fic? A SECOND YIBO VIRGIN FIC!

This author also writes extremely good yizhan threesomes so here’s three of them!

Some Nights by mrsronweasley (Yizhan/Xuan Lu (Jiang Yanli), E, 2k)

Xuan Lu opened her legs to him and Xiao Zhan wasted no time diving in. He pressed his mouth against her pussy, licking her out steadily as her thighs trembled around him. She was nestled between Yibo's legs and if Xiao Zhan looked up, not only could he see the planes of her body, her small breasts going up and down with her breathing, ribs expanding, her tipped back head and open mouth, but Yibo, gaze boring into Xiao Zhan's as he ate Xuan Lu out.

The entire cast is hot and there is no reason they shouldn’t ALL fuck! Not one reason!!!!!!

gege loves you by mrsronweasley (Yizhan/Wang Zhuocheng (Jiang Cheng)), E, 7k)

"We are very sorry," Xiao Zhan murmured as he unbuttoned Zhuocheng's jeans while Yibo kissed his ear, "for how we've been acting."

"Is this how you apologize to everyone," Zhuocheng panted, hands already going for his zipper to help Xiao Zhan along, "or am I special?"

WHEW LORD!!!!!!!!! WHEW!!!!!!!

Talking in the Dark by mrsronweasley (Yizhan (Side Xiao Zhan/M/F), E, 14k)

Xiao Zhan has a light-hearted romp of a threeway with some friends, then makes the mistake of telling Yibo. It goes down.

A non-yizhan threesome BUT features jealous!yibo which is a ton of fun.

Finally, a couple AUs!

With Joy and Purpose by feenwitch (Yizhan, E, 30k) ***

Yibo has been alone for approximately five Earth years when Xiao Zhan crash lands on his planet.

YIZHAN ANDROID AU!!!!!!!! This is a very star trek-esque universe which is fun, but the fic itself is also CRAZY interesting and moving and beautiful!!!!!!!!! It’s A LOT! This was a rec from Nina, so thank you Nina!

Bound With a Same-Heart Knot by mrsronweasley (Yizhan, E, 59k)

London, 1892. Xiao Zhan, a promising young attache at the Chinese embassy is tasked with showing the new ambassador's son Wang Yibo around London. The inevitable happens.

Victorian AU! I actually think you already read this, but included for posterity.

AND SCENE! This is the result of two months of daily fic reading, having 50 tabs of fic open at any given time, reading truly anything and everything, and Loving The Untamed. I’m SO EXCITED you’re diving into fic for this show and I can’t wait to talk to you about all of them and to have someone to scream with! WOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

[theradioghost]

So I’ve realized recently that I actually really really like podcasts when my audio processing isn’t acting up (thanks tma!) and was wondering what recs you have for completed podcasts. I’m cool with basically any genre and theme, though I would appreciate a warning for tragedy. Thanks for your time!

Of course! I’ll put this one under a cut just so the length is a bit less ridiculous.

Some of my favorite completed shows are

Wolf 359 – a scifi comedy about four squabbling coworkers on a malfunctioning, isolated space station which then takes a hard right into a spectacular, heartwrenching drama. Not a tragedy, but many tears are shed when listening. Probably one of the best podcasts out there tbqh.

Ars Paradoxica – a modern physicist accidentally invents time travel, landing her back at the start of the Cold War and changing the course of history forever. The creators literally described it as “a tragedy” and they weren’t lying, although the finale is sort of hopefully bittersweet.

The Hidden Almanac – a grouchy professor in a plague doctor mask offers bite-sized pieces of history and hagiography from his fantastical world as well as gardening advice, occasionally interrupted and/or dragged off on unwilling shenanigans by his tequila-loving accidental necromancer best friend coworker. Fantasy writer/artist Ursula Vernon and her husband put this 4-minute show out three times a week for SEVEN YEARS, and it’s funny and cozy and poetic and can be found in full here, as there are too many episodes for most podcatchers to display.

Alice Isn’t Dead – lesbian Americana road-trip horror. A cross-country trucker searches for her missing wife while monsters and conspiracies pursue her across the vast empty and abandoned spaces of America. Actually also exists in novel form.

The Bright Sessions – records from the office of Dr. Bright, a therapist who specializes in people with strange and secret abilities. However, her patients aren’t the only ones with secrets. Personally this show never completely absorbed me like some others did, but the character writing is genuinely amazing. The story obviously also deals a lot with mental illness and some other difficult topics and content.

Our Fair City – the eight-season saga of the inhabitants of a post-apocalyptic underground city ruled over by the remnants of an insurance company, featuring mole people, lightning-harvesting sky sailors, giant ants, and a found family of mad scientists among others. Part comedy, part drama, all anticapitalist satire. You kind of have to give it a couple of seasons to find its stride (this was one of the very first shows in the podcast-based audio drama revival) but it is absolutely worth it. Disclaimer that while I am on the final season of the show I have not quite finished it yet.

Jarnsaxa Rising – a unique scifi-fantasy hybrid, in which a vengeful Norse giantess escapes imprisonment with the goal of destroying the gods and bringing about Ragnarok, only to find herself in a post-climate-change dystopian future.

Glasgow Ghost Stories – a Scottish woman begins noticing the many ghosts inhabiting the streets of her city; but the ghosts have begun to notice her too, and not all of them are friendly. Pigeons are involved.

Big Data – an odd little heist comedy about a rogue journalist investigating a spectacular crime in which the “seven keys to the internet” are stolen, leading to a story about hacking in which no actual hacking is involved. There are two fun side notes to it: one, everything that happens in it could technically happen in real life. Two, it involves an absurd amount of cameos from other well-known podcasts (and also Taika Waititi?), which you don’t need to get to follow the story but which make it kind of hilarious on a whole other level when you listen to those shows.

I Am In Eskew – a surreal, intense, disturbingly poetic horror about a man trapped in a shifting, malevolent, impossible city, and a woman on the outside trying to find him. Extremely good but I do recommend thoroughly checking the trigger warnings on this one. (Surprisingly non-tragic finale, although not a typical “happy ending.”)

The Alexandria Archives – half comedy and half horror, in the form of a late-night radio show at Alexandria University, on the edge of North Carolina’s Great Dismal Swamp. Half of each episode is a standalone cosmic horror story set in and around the town of Alexandria. The other half features the antics of the university’s students, including the host MW and her friends who are definitely Canadian exchange students, and not a vampire hiding from his ex and a bunch of stranded space pirates. (A little goofy? Yes, but I love it a ton for all its faults anyway. Also, some of the short stories are genuinely terrifying.)

and also, some completed miniseries!!

The Tower – a gorgeous experimental audio drama in which a young woman decides to climb the mysterious Tower, from which no one ever returns.

Time:Bombs – a comedy by the folks who made Wolf 359 about a bomb disposal squad on New Year’s Eve, trying to survive their leader’s obsession with breaking a record.

They Say a Lot of Things – upon discovering that she can interact with a dropped tape recorder, the ghost of a young girl tells her story, interwoven with the stories of those who have passed through the abandoned house that she cannot leave over the years that she’s haunted it.

Podcaster A. R. Olivieri specializes in microfiction miniseries, ranging from scifi to experimental to fantasy. (Side note, a lot of his work crosses over with the still-running scifi podcast Girl In Space, but you don’t need to have listened to GIS to understand what’s going on in his shows.)

Nym’s Nebulous Notions – a self-declared investigative journalist decides to check out a mysterious SOS signal and finds herself on a mysteriously abandoned ship – or so she thinks. Arguably a tragedy, although not necessarily in the way you might think.

Palimpsest – technically not finished, but each season of this anthology makes up a complete 10-part story, and seasons 1 and 2 are complete. Season 1 is a ghost story about a woman who is suspicious about strange happenings in her new home and her odd new neighbors. Season 2 is a turn-of-the-century dark urban fantasy about a girl who escapes her career criminal mother’s house, taking a job as the companion to what her new employer claims is an imprisoned faerie princess. (Season 3 is ongoing and is about a codebreaker who begins seeing ghosts on London’s streets during the Blitz.) It’s a heartbreaking sort of show, albeit in a very beautiful and moving way.

The Details is a short piece about an office worker who goes in to negotiate for a promotion and finds himself negotiating with the devil himself instead. The number of genuinely surprising and excellent twists it packs into just 45 minutes is really fun.

The London Necropolis Railway – a really underappreciated little fantasy-mystery about a recently-dead detective who refuses to board the train scheduled to take her to the afterlife until one of its hapless employees helps her solve her supernatural murder.

Janus Descending – a scifi horror told in two intertwining perspectives, one in reverse order and one in chronological order, about two scientists who land on a remote planet to investigate the ruins of its lost civilization, only to encounter the thing that killed the former inhabitants. A fantastic story told in a really clever and unique way, but stamp a big old tragedy warning all OVER this one, although because of the structure you technically know how it’s going to end right from the start – what makes this show so good is how you get there. It will make you cry, though.

… and also my show, Midnight Radio, which is about lesbian romance, small towns, old radio shows, the good and bad sides of nostalgia, and ghost stories.

[softboywriting]

At First Sight | Part One| Werewolf AU | Shawn Mendes

Summary: You move to a werewolf community with your mom to start a new life. You’ve always dreamed of finding a mate and having a fairy tale romance like your parents once had, and maybe this place is where it’s finally going to happen. [fluff] [mates] [werewolf au] [half-blood au]

Word Count: 3.4k

|Masterlist In Bio|

The second you stepped in to the Lunacasa community you knew you were home. It had been so long since you felt safe anywhere and to be in a place where werewolves were the only ones allowed was something else.

When you were a child your parents home schooled you until you were about fifteen, when your dad passed away unexpectedly in a car accident. After that you went to a local high school because your mom simply couldn't work and teach you anymore. High school was a nightmare, as it was for many young teens. However your case was different. You didn't blend in so well. Werewolves were known to humans and most of them looked like humans with little to no defining features. Your problem is that you look human, ninety nine percent human, until you get to your ears.

Unfortunately you had gotten unlucky in the gene pool. Your mother, a werewolf and your father, a human, happened to result in you having small wolf like ears that stick out from the sides of your head where your normal human ears should be. It's as if you're mid transformation all the time and your ears just got stuck halfway between human and wolf.

It wasn't unheard of that werewolves and humans intermixed, but most often it was uncommon that they successfully had a child. When they did, well, usually it turned out human looking but without the ability to shape shift and maybe some weakened senses if it survived at all. You were...well to put it plainly, one in a million. The doctors think you tried to shift in the womb and things got a little messed up. Your hearing isn't too badly affected thankfully, it's not the best but it's alright. The doctors said its a result of the deformity.

Going to a public high school was torture. People didn’t want to be your friend, they picked on you relentlessly and you weren't allowed to cover your ears with a hat or any head wear, per school policy. Every week without fail, someone pulled your ears and or howled at you. Not even any of your werewolf peers would stand up for you. It was hell.

Graduation came soon enough and then you were free to be yourself in the real world. In theory anyways. Companies don't want to hire a girl with wolf ears. They don't even finish interviews with girls with wolf ears, no matter how much experience you put on your resume, they didn't care.

Thankfully you managed to get into the call center your mom worked part time at, and because it was dealing with customers over the phone only, they hired you. The job was a blessing. You were able to help your mom make the bills and put food on the table. Things were looking up for you...until more werewolves moved into your area. Male werewolves in particular.

The first night two wolves followed you home you knew you were in trouble. After that you refused to go out alone, anytime or any place, someone had to go with you.

For two years you lived like this, hiding in your house or making sure that you were never alone in fear a rogue wolf would take you. You always covered your ears when you went out. Scarves, hats, headbands and hoods, all of them worked and did wonders when you went shopping with your mom.

It wasn't until your mom heard about a community upstate that was hiring a teacher for onsite kindergarten and preschool grade wolves that you realized you had a chance to escape the hell you had been living in.

A community with Werewolves where humans wouldn't judge you and you would be accepted how you were and not tailed by wolves looking for a cute wolf to fuck and forget. It was a dream and you knew your mom had to get this job. For weeks your mom applied and interviewed for the position, often driving several hours to the community for them after work. The job was a golden opportunity. It would mean rent free living because she would be an employee within the community. Combine that with safety and security within the area and you were set for life.

Weeks went by without a word and then one day a woman called and said your mom got the job. A few days later and you are well on your way to the Lunacasa community.

_____________________

You stand in a grand hall that's beautifully decorated with hanging chandeliers and art between every window. It looks almost like a high end art gallery of some sort. To be honest, when you heard the word community you figured it would be just like a gated neighborhood or something. Needless to say your expectations have been blown out of the water.

This community is huge. Driving into the place was like driving through a small town. You passed shops and homes as you drove down the main street toward the massive building you’re in now. It is supposedly the community building but it looks more like a giant mansion and you wouldn’t be surprised to find out it was once a mansion that has been converted.

"Maybe you'll find a nice boy here." Your mom says, elbowing you encouragingly as she takes in the main hall. 

"I'd love to Mom. You've always told me how you and Dad fell for each other, it makes me want to have something like that."

"I know honey." She wraps her arm around you and lays her head on your shoulder. "I promise you'll find that special someone."

The sound of heels clicking on the wood floor snaps you out of your thoughts. A short curvy middle aged woman with long black hair is approaching followed by a very young, tall and handsome well dressed man behind her.

“Hello! Welcome! You must be Maria!” The woman says excitedly, extending her hand as she clicks closer. Your mom takes it, introduces the two of you and the woman says her name is Nancy and she is the Community Resources Director.

“This is Sha-” Nancy turns to introduce the young man who had been walking with her, only to find he has stopped a few feet back.

You look past Nancy and you can see he is staring at you. A flush rises on your cheeks. Surely he's spotted your ears. Great.

“Shawn? Are you alright?” Nancy asks, frowning.

“Yeah,” Shawn growls, clearing his throat and walking forward to meet you. “I'm fine. I've just got something...stuck, ahem!”

Nancy looks him over curiously. His behavior is obviously alarming her. “This is Shawn, he's the head alpha here. He oversees the pack, community, I'm sorry. If you ever have an issue don't be afraid to talk to him or myself.”

Your mom smiles and nods, continuing her conversation with Nancy but you don't hear a word. All you can focus on is Shawn. There's something about him that makes you want him. His presence is so inviting, warm and familiar. Never before have you felt so interested in someone. You've met other wolves of course but none that have made you feel like this.

Nancy, your mom and Shawn talk a while longer. Just some basic chit chat about Lunacasa and every few seconds Shawn looks at you, eyes on your face and other times sweeping over your body. His gaze didn't make you uncomfortable, and it holds no ill intent, like that of so many wolves that have ogled you before.

The three of them finish talking and Shawn extends his hand out to you as Nancy says she has some papers for your mom to sign for the new position.

“I can show you around while Nancy gets your mom set up for work.”

“Oh, um...” You look down and bite the inside of your cheek. You're sure it would be rude to refuse him without a legitimate reason. You didn't think you'd be alone with him so soon.

“Please?”

You place your hand on Shawn's and he curls his much larger fingers around yours. You look up and his eyes are alight in a golden amber hue. It takes your breath away. You have never seen golden eyes on a wolf before, its stunning in contrast to his dark hair and lightly tanned skin.

“I promise I don't bite.” He says playfully with a half chuckle.

“What if I like biting?” You cover your mouth, shocked at your own words. Where had that come from? That was not you. No way. 

Shawn smirks, and he leans in close. “If you like biting, you'd best let me know.”

"I-I'm so sorry. That was so rude."

He chuckles, a warm smile on his lips. He's clearly brushed it off, or he's just playing along with your outburst as to not make you feel so embarrassed. "No worries. Come on, I'll show you where you'll be staying."

"I hope it's not too far away, I didn’t wear walking shoes." You look down at your slip on flats and back up to Shawn.

Shawn rubs his thumb over the back of your hand in his and suddenly you realize he hasn't let go of it yet. "Most of the housing isn't too far from the main building. Everything is in walking distance currently, but no, your place isn’t far."

You walk with Shawn through the building until you reach a large set of double doors. "Can I ask you something?" You ask as Shawn pushes open the doors to a big garden enclosed by the building and several small homes.

"Anything."

You look around at the garden you've walked into. There are a bunch of kids running around and giggling, running along the stone paths and playing catch with a ball. "How are you the alpha in charge?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're fairly young right? You don't look much older than me."

Shawn hums and leads you to a path that goes toward the back of a small brick house. "If you had to guess, how old do you think I am?"

"Um, well, I'm twenty one. So...maybe twenty three?"

"Close. I'm twenty five. My turn to ask a question."

"Okay?" You stop outside the front door to the house and Shawn runs his hand over your left ear, taking the tip between his fingers to rub gently.

"How did this happen?"

"My ears?"

"Mmmhmm."

You reach up and cover them with your hands. The familiar feeling of insecurity creeps up your spine and your heart sinks, this place isn't going to be different is it. "I was born like this, it’s a defect of being a half blood. Is that a problem?"

Shawn laughs, out right laughs. Not a response you expected. "Absolutely its not a problem. I think they're very cute and definitely unique. I’ve never seen ears like this. Are you a half-blood?"

"Y-yeah."

"That's incredible." He reaches for your hands and pulls them away from your head. "They’re beautiful. Don't hide your ears, they're part of you."

"It's a habit. Having ears like this isn't easy."

"We're going to change that." He puts his fingers under your chin and lifts your head to look at him. Your heartbeat skyrockets. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to find me. I'm always around."

"O-oh okay. So this is my place then?"

"Mmm." Shawn hands you a small key and you close your hand around it. "I'll let you explore on your own now. Remember, I'm always available."

_____________________

"What do you think?" Your mom asks you a few days later after you've gotten everything moved into the house. It's a small place, only slightly bigger than your apartment in the city but just right for the two of you.

You turn to look at her from the kitchen where you're unpacking a box of pans and utensils. "About what?"

"This place. What's your first impression?"

"It's nice. Everyone has been really friendly so far. The grounds look well kept up." You stack pans in the cupboard under the sink. You can't help but think about Shawn. The way he made you feel all warm and cozy with just a look was unlike anything you've felt before. You wonder if he could be your mate.

"How about Shawn?" Your mom says in that teasing, 'I know something you don't' type of voice.

You stand and look at her, wondering if she was somehow a mind reader now. Sure enough she's got a little grin on her face. "Mom, he's the alpha. He's nice I guess."

"Do you like him?"

"Of course. He is very polite."

"Polite hmm?"

"Mom!"

"Oh come on! That boy had eyes for your across the room! Anyone could see he was flirting with you. What did you talk about after I left the first day? Does he like your ears? I heard he likes them."

You flush and you can feel the heat creep down your neck. "Who said he likes them?"

"He did." Your mom walks over and leans against the counter, smirking triumphantly. "He said he thinks you're a lovely young lady and that he thinks your ears unique. We talked a little about how I got pregnant and stuff and how rare it is to have a half blood."

"You talked about me?!"

"Well, not like you specifically! We just talked about how rare it is to find someone like you."

You cover your face and groan. "Mom, I don't want everything to be about my ears here. I want to be me, to be accepted as a normal person and not defined by my stupid ears."

"I'm sorry baby." She lays her hand on your back. "I promise I won't talk to anyone about you anymore. I didn't want to be rude and Shawn was curious. I promise, no more. You're just you, okay?"

"Thanks Mom." A knock on the back door to the garden gets your attention and you look to your mom. "Did you invite someone over?"

"No?" She goes to the door and opens it to find Shawn standing there with a little box. "Shawn, hello. What brings you here?"

Shawn steps in at your mom's invitation and he looks around with a soft smile. "The place looks cozy "

"Thank you."

He extends the box in his hands to your mom. "This is a welcoming gift from Nancy and I. We made them last night."

You walk into the living room as your mom takes the top off the box. Inside is a bunch of mini muffins. "You made these?"

"Mmhmm. I wanted to do something special for the two of you to welcome you to Lunacasa. I know it's not much, and I hope they're good."

You smile at Shawn and he gives a warm smile right back. Your mom says she's going to take them to the kitchen and you step forward so she can go around you.

"How are things going?" Shawn asks softly, looking around the house once more. "You've unpacked a lot."

"It's going alright. We have a lot to work through, boxes and stuff. My bed is still against the wall in my room. It'll be another long night on the couch probably."

"Do you need help?"

"Um..." You look around. You want to say no, but you actually would love some help. It's Shawn and you definitely have a crush on him, so you kind of don't want him to help. "I-"

"Honey, I think I left some stuff in the trailer." Your mom says, grabbing her keys off the table in the dining area. "I'll be right back." She gives you a look as she slips out the door, one that you know means she didn't actually forget anything. She's just giving you space with Shawn.

Shawn chuckles and raises his eyebrows. "So? Can I help?"

"Y-yeah. Can you move a bed?"

"Definitely."

Shawn follows you into your bedroom. Your bed is propped up against the far wall with your box spring beside it. The frame is put together already since it's just a quick slide and bolt together set up. You go to one side of the box spring and Shawn goes to the other.  

"Have you lived with wolves before?" Shawn asks as you tip the box spring onto its side and slide it onto the frame. "Or is this your first time?"

"This is my first time living with other wolves. There were some in my neighborhood but they weren't exactly a great crowd."

The two of you flip the mattress onto the box spring and shift it into place. You fall onto it, losing your footing on accident and Shawn sits down beside you as the two of you laugh. "You never answered my question by the way." You say, realizing that the other day when you asked him how he became the one in charge of the community, he didn't actually answer you.

"What's that?"

"How did you come to be in charge of this place?"

"Oh, right." Shawn lays back and his head is touching yours. "My dad founded this place as a safe haven for wolves when I was a kid. He got sick a few years back when I was eighteen. He didn't seem to get any better, he said he was, but I could tell. He taught me everything I needed to know. How to be kind and compassionate, and how to be the support people needed. He taught me, this isn't just a pack, it's a community. He was gone a few weeks later."

"I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, it's been a while now." Shawn looks over at you as you look at him. "Sorry I kind of dumped that on you. I didn't mean to put that kind of weight on your shoulders"

"No, I asked."

Shawn reaches up and runs his fingers over your ear causing you to shiver. "Do you mind if touch them?"

"Not really. Just be careful."

He sits up and you go to sit up too but he stops you, a hand on your shoulder. He moves around behind you on the mattress and sits so you can put your head in his lap. It's intimate, so much so that you're not sure what to do besides stare up at the man before you. Things are happening fast and you aren't sure how to feel. You're not uncomfortable, but you don't think you should be as comfortable as you are.

"Is this okay?"

"Y-yeah. Should we be doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"My head is in your lap. You're petting my ears. We've only just met a few days ago. I shouldn't be so comfortable with you should I?"

Shawn chuckles softly. "I can definitely tell you haven't been around wolves. This is normal for wolves who have an attraction to each other. For humans it might seem a little fast, but with wolves, the sooner we can be physically affectionate the better."

"Is that why you feel so familiar, like I've known you forever?"

"Mmmhmm." He runs his hand over your left ear. 

“I wonder if this is what my mom means when she tells me about how her and my dad fell in love at first sight.”

Shawn stops touching your ears and takes a deep breath. "Can I tell you something?"

"Sure?"

"Since I saw you I’ve wanted nothing more than to hold you against my chest and fall asleep with you in my arms. Sleeping with someone, being close and vulnerable is my biggest weakness." He's flushed, as if embarrassed to admit this. "I haven't felt this way for someone before, and I just don’t want it to stop.

"What if you don't really like me?"

"What?"

"I mean, what if we get to know each other and we aren't compatible. What if this is just a honeymoon phase?"

He grins and shakes his head. "Wolves don't have that. When we connect with someone, it's not like having a crush and then you find out maybe that person isn't all you thought they were. Wolves are drawn to each other, pulled together by forces unknown. We are connected deeper than surface emotions."

"Like magic? Or fate?"

"Magic, fate, love at first sight, you can call it anything you like." He grabs your hand and brings it up to his to press his palm to yours. His hand is much bigger and it's so warm you can't help but thread your fingers between his. "The bond is unbreakable. We're part of each other's lives now that we've met."

"I think this is definitely what my parents had." You smile, looking up at him. "I've always wanted to-"

"Honey, I'm back, are you-" you look over at your mom standing in the doorway. "Here?"

You sit up, flushed hot head to toe and you scoot away from Shawn. How embarrassing. Shawn stands and offers his hand to help you up. He can tell you're not comfortable with your mom seeing the two of you together.

"I'll see you around then?"

"Yeah."

"Ma'am," he smiles, nodding at your mom as he passes to see himself out.

"Please don't say anything." You mumble, staring at the floor.

You mom is quiet for a second. "I ordered dinner."

"Okay." You turn and busy yourself with a box of clothes. "Thanks Mom."

"No problem honey."

End part one

-------------

I know this is a cheesy and dorky and so cliche soulmate-y au but it was what I wanted to write at the time. I’ll probably post another part soon. 

Please Reblog if you read, enjoyed, or just want to save for later!

Thank you again. You’re all amazing and supportive!! - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

[masterweaverx]

Tyrian Callows. I gave a vague, offhand description of what I thought he was in an earlier post, but now I guess it’s time to explain my reasoning. Strap in, we’re getting into the gear of this guy.

Obviously the first thing we want for this build is to incorporate the scorpion tail somehow, both in stabbing and in poison. We’re also going to want a way for Tyrian to manipulate his opponents around the battlefield for his own twisted amusement. And of course he needs to match that with the ability to pit people against each other with just a few well-placed words.

To point an Array, we’re actually opening up this build with 15 points in Wisdom. I know I do that a lot, but a lot of the RWBY characters are very perceptive and Tyrian knows just what to say to frighten anybody. 14 points in Dexterity after that, because he’s a very capable fighter, followed by 13 points in Strength for purposes of multiclassing. 12 points in Constitution after that, Tyrian’s a very durable chap, followed by 10 points in Charisma for that incredible laugh, and let’s leave his Intelligence at 8--who needs booksmarts when you have faith in the dark goddess?

Now in my earlier reblog I said Tyrian would be a wildhunt shifter, but rethinking things a bit I think the better choice would be a Simic Hybrid. Simic Hybrids get +2 to their Constitution and +1 to one other ability of their choice, and I’m going to go with Wisdom to even that out. They have 60 feet of Darkvision, and can choose two Animal Enhancements--Nimble Climber gives Tyrian a climbing speed equal to his walking speed, and Carapace gives him +1 to his AC while he’s unarmored. Technically he doesn’t get the benefits of Carapace till level five, but you know, we’re doing a total twenty-level build here so that’s a bit of a semantic complaint.

I still think Tyrian would have the Acolyte background, though, for some fairly obvious reasons, and that gives him proficiency in Insight and Religion, as well as a couple bonus languages. Do the Grimm have a language? Did I just make Tyrian even more terrifying? I dunno. He also technically gets the Shelter of the Faithful feature, so if there’s a church of Salem he can head over there for free healing. Do the Grimm have a religion? Would they worship Salem? These are very important questions we’re just going to ignore.

Tyrian’s getting 4 levels as an Assassin Rogue, 6 levels as a Drunken Master Monk, and 10 levels as a Beast Barbarian. Ordinarily I wouldn’t care about the order of how he gets these, but because of a few multiclassing oddities we need to take the Rogue class first and the Monk class before the Barbarian class. And just to get it out of the way, we get four Ability Score Improvements; I’m going to burn one to get the Resilient feat, giving Tyrian +1 Strength and proficiency in Strength saves, and spend the six points left to get Wisdom and Dexterity both up to 18. So that’s 18 Wisdom and Dexterity, 14 Strength and Constitution, 10 Charisma, and 8 Intelligence, all things told.

Rogues get proficiency with Light Armor, Simple Weapons, and a bunch of specific weapons I’m going to gloss over because multiclassing into Barbarian just gives us proficiency with Martial Weapons and Shields anyway. They also get proficiency in Thieves’ Tools and Dexterity and Intelligence saving throws, and four skill proficiencies; Acrobatics, Athletics, Intimidation, and Stealth are must-haves for Tyrian.

Tyrian’s Rogue levels give him a few noncombat benefits, such as knowing Thieves’ Cant (the secret language of criminals) and Expertise in two skills (I’d go with Intimidation and Acrobatics). Mostly, though, it just gives him a bit of an edge--he can deal 2d6 extra damage with a Sneak Attack, so long as he has advantage on the attack or is flanking the target, and his Cunning Action lets him Dash, Disengage, or Hide as a bonus action. And being an Assassin not only gives him proficiency with Disguise and Poisoner’s Kits, it also means he has advantage on attack rolls against creatures that haven’t taken a turn and that he’s guaranteed a critical hit on any target who’s surprised.

With six levels as a Monk, Tyrian has a base AC equal to 10+his Dexterity modifier+his Wisdom modifier (+1 for his racial Carapace feature) while not wearing armor, and a movement speed of 45 feet at the same time, and he can reduce falling damage by 30 HP. He also gets martial arts, letting him use his Dexterity for attack and damage rolls and rolling 1d6 for his damage rolls with unarmed or monk weapons (which handaxes count as), as well as make an unarmed strike as a bonus action when he takes the attack action. He can make an Extra Attack per every attack action, and his Ki-Empowered strikes count as magical for purposes of resistance. And speaking of Ki, Tyrian has a pool of six Ki points that regenerate on a rest, which he can spend to make a Flurry of Blows, engage in Patient Defense, take a Step of the Wind, Deflect Missles some girl is shooting at him, or make a Stunning Strike.

Of course, as a Drunken Master Monk (or more accurately a Complete Nutjob Monk), Tyrian gets a few more perks. Whenever he makes a Flurry of Blows, he can Disengage for free and gets +10 to his speed. He can Leap To His Feet from a prone position using only 5 feet of movement, and he can spend a Ki point to redirect a failed Melee attack to somebody next to him, which with his absolutely ridiculous AC is likely to happen. And of course, Tyrian gains proficiency with Brewer’s Supplies, which means he can make you a drink and poison it too! No wonder he’s Qrow’s nemesis...

Ten levels in Barbarian just makes a terrifying man that much more terrifying. Tyrian can enter a Rage as a bonus action, though maybe it’s better to call it a Fervor for him. This gives him advantage on Strength checks and Strength saving throws, +3 damage to any Strength-based melee attack, and resistance to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage. A Rage can last for one minute, but it ends early if Tyrian doesn’t attack anybody by the end of his turn. Luckily he can Rage four times per long rest. He can also make a Reckless Attack, giving him advantage on Strength-based melee attack rolls for a turn at the cost of giving others advantage against him. And a Brutal Crutical lets him add one extra damage die to a critical hit.

Tyrian also gets a Danger Sense, giving him advantage on dexterity saving throws against anything he can see, and Feral Instinct, granting him advantage on initiative rolls and the ability to act while Surprised if the first action he takes is to enter a Rage. Finally, we’re swapping out Fast Movement for the alternate feature Instinctive Pounce; this means Tyrian can lunge up to a creature that ends their turn within fifteen feet of him as a reaction, without provoking attacks of oppurtunity.

Of course the big reason we’re taking so many levels in Barbarian is to get the Beast Primal Path, which will finally give Tyrian his signature tail. Granted, he only gets it when he Rages because of how the game mechanics work, but his tail deals 1d12 piercing damage on a hit and has the reach property. The Beastial Soul feature lets him swap between being a fast swimmer, powerful jumper, and ridiculous climber every rest; honestly, he’s got good jumps, so that’s probably his default. And of course there’s Infectious Fury, which forces a Wisdom Save on anybody he hits with his tail; if they fail, they either have to make a melee attack against another creature Tyrian picks, or they take 2d12 psychic damage.

All this combined makes Tyrian hard to hit and gives him loads of ways to hit hard, as well as granting him options to make people hit other people and get in and out of fights as he so pleases.

So yeah, that’s Tyrian.

[gorogues]

Spoilers for Flash #750!

You can see a few preview pages here, here, and here.  There are so many pages in the issue that it’s tough to choose which ones to include here.

This was definitely worthy of a milestone issue.  There are multiple stories: one set in the present, a Len solo story which is sort of set in the Johns era, a pre-Crisis Sam story, a New 52-esque Speed Mind story, a Golden Age Jay story, and one about Wally's new role.  Plus, of course, a bunch of gorgeous pinups.

To get things out of the way, unfortunately it is definitely confirmed that Commander Cold is dead.  Steadfast and Fuerza are alive but off to do other things, James is locked up in a cell again, and the other Rogues are loose.  David Singh appears and is surprisingly nice to Barry, and it's confirmed that he and Hartley are still together and doing well.  Roy appears briefly and is now 100% confirmed to be in current continuity (technically his previous appearances were in a holiday issue, which are often of dubious canonicity, and he'd seemingly appeared twice in Zandia but at least one of his 'appearances' there was a Psych illusion).  And Iris is working on a story about how the Flash has helped people and inspired them, so we see flashbacks of Barry saving the day from various Rogues and Grodd.

Then Godspeed shows up, and lures Barry to the Flash Museum so Paradox can confront him.  Paradox airs his grievances, and tells Barry to give up being the Flash or see everything he cares about destroyed.  Paradox sics August on Barry, and the story ends in a cliffhanger, undoubtedly to be continued next issue.  It's notable that August is surprised to learn of the future Flash who was killed by Paradox, and perhaps that'll play into him turning on his boss in the story to come...at least if his desire for atonement is real, and he's actually upset to see any version of Barry killed.  It's possible that he thinks he can play along and save Barry from Paradox even if he has to beat him up a bit.

Then we've got the Len solo story by Johns and Kolins, which is shown above.  As always, Kolins is great with the little details which don't even figure into the story but add a lot.  We see the Stanley Cup stashed in Len's filthy apartment, as is tradition.  And Len's got a computer now, which is interesting.  Some of Lisa's stuff is stored in his closet, and he's got a yearbook photo of the Rogues.  And later in the story Jai is wearing a turtle shirt, which must be a nod to the long-rumoured plan that he was supposed to become the new Turtle before Flashpoint (you may recall that he was depowered in Flash: Rebirth and resentful about it, and Eobard claimed that one of Wally's kids would ruin his life).  Jai and Irey's appearance tells us that this isn't quite in proper continuity or is set during the Brightest Day era -- but if it was set during Brightest Day, Wally wouldn't necessarily think Len's actions were directed specifically at him, since Barry would be around too.  And even the yearbook photo fudges things a bit, since we wouldn't have a costumed Lisa and a youthful Roscoe around at the same time, barring a retcon.  Though Johns does love his retcons, so you never know.

The Len story is great and a lot of fun, and shows much of what we love and maybe also dislike about that era of Len.  As always, he over-indulges on the beer even as he otherwise decries drug use (although in fairness, he doesn't say anything about drugs in this story), but that is one of his flaws and probably one of the remnants of an abusive upbringing steeped in booze.  Johns seems to be throwing a little shade at the New 52 Rogues with the line "Guys who can snap their fingers and make a snowstorm because of some meta gene, how do you respect that?  When I hold that gadget in my hand, it means something."  Agree or disagree with that statement -- I don't think it's necessarily right or wrong -- there's no question that the meta Rogues were very much at odds with the Rogues of the Johns era.  And you may recall that Johns depowered New 52 Len as soon as he got a chance to; it's pretty clear he didn't like that development.

Wally's interpretation of Len's actions is very interesting and completely understandable from his POV, but of course he's misread the situation entirely.  Obviously he doesn't know Len as well as he thinks he does.  He'd be correct if it was quite a few other Flash villains (including some of the other Rogues), but he assumes the worst of all of them and we've seen before that sometimes he's wrong.  But the Len of that era deliberately cultivated misperceptions of himself and the other Rogues to get people to underestimate him or keep them off-balance, and ultimately he's probably got himself to blame for Wally's misunderstanding.  I don't think Len would mind Wally misunderstanding him for the reasons mentioned above, but maybe Wally would treat him better if he truly understood Len's motivations.  Food for thought.

It's also nice to see Chyre and Morillo too, who are very much missed.  Chyre's been name-dropped in the Rebirth era, but I'd like to see him and Morillo actually appearing again, even if just occasionally.

The Sam story is pretty cool and has a lot of Silver/Bronze Age simplicity and weirdness to it, and wouldn't be out of place in the published stories of that era.  So I admire that Wolfman and Rossmo were able to capture those aspects in it.  The issue doesn't contain something from every era of the Flash, but this story covers the Silver/Bronze Age era wonderfully.

The Jay story is really interesting; it's otherwise a very Golden Age-inspired story with the Thinker, but then Eobard puts in a surprise appearance, taunting Jay that he'll be forgotten in the future.  It's a very Eobard thing to do, although unusual to see him taking an interest in Jay.  And obviously it foreshadows Jay's disappearance from this Earth/continuity from the New 52 until recently.  I'm very much looking forward to seeing how Jay is used now that he and the JSA seem to be back, and wonder if Eobard will continue bothering him.  Obviously Eobard's primary grudge is with Barry, but of course he's messed with other members of the Flash Family as well.  And messing with the Flash Family in general may become a hobby of his with the [spoilers for comics in May] development that he's creating his own Reverse Flash Family.

The Wally story is partly an epilogue to the Flash Forward series and partly a prologue to the upcoming Generation Zero issue on Free Comic Book Day.  In it, Wally observes different versions of continuity: the pre-Flashpoint history and the post-Flashpoint history, side by side and seemingly both still in continuity.  Or, if not still in continuity, then still existing together.  Presumably he (or someone else) will deal with that to streamline continuity, but the question is, will both versions still remain, get merged into one, or will something else happen entirely?  We may not find out until FCBD and beyond.

So all in all, this was a great issue, and fitting for a milestone.  It was great fun to see the various stories, pinups, and variant covers, and so nice to see a classic Johns-Kolins story about Len, a spotlight on Jay, and an era-appropriate story featuring classic Sam.  It's also good to finally get some answers about lingering questions in current continuity like the fate of James and Commander Cold and the missing Forces users, even if we're not always happy about the developments.  I do think Henry's killing was weirdly abrupt and has been handled as something of an afterthought so I'm not thrilled about that, but it is good to get confirmation and some finality to it.  Hopefully he isn't completely forgotten after this.

[utilitycaster]

Session Zero: why tho

So here’s my take on why one does a session zero, since it’s not universal (but you should do it for a long term campaign unless you know your players super well already)

One part is to get some logistical stuff out of the way - when to meet and how often, virtual meeting tools if applicable (hint: currently applicable), if anyone needs to borrow the books/get a PDF copy, and so on. But that could have been an email. Why a session?

1. Figure out what your players want.

I don’t think this is a very spicy take but it might be new to some people; not all players are down for “hey here’s my cool campaign idea meet me at 2 pm on Saturday, bring dice”. The DM is not the storyteller. Or rather, you’re not the only storyteller. If you don’t want the players to break your cool premise, write a novel, but if you want to build something together, have a session zero. That doesn’t mean you can’t put in some restrictions, and you shouldn’t run something you’re not excited about because the DM is going to be working hard, but this is a shared world and your players will be more invested if it’s theirs, too. Do they want dungeon crawling? monster hunting? political intrigue?

This is also a good time to cover no-go topics (triggers or just things people don’t vibe with) and things people really want (sometimes someone really wants there to be a dungeon. or a dragon), and to talk about structure. Do you want a sort of sitcom structure of “problem arises at beginning of session, is resolved by end” or do you want something more overarching, or a mix? All these approaches are valid, so it’s a matter of being on the same page.

2. Party balance and also a note on what you want.

I am opposed on a philosophical level to that tweet about how an a party of all tiefling bards is not unrealistic because it misses the point to the extreme. It’s not unrealistic for a friend group to share a lot of similarities. A D&D party, however is not a friend group. It becomes a friend group, and even a family, but it starts as a group of people with some kind of shared motivation, which may be as tenuous as “a troll attacked the tavern we were all in”. It’s less a friend group and more putting a heist team together (either on purpose or by accident); the uniting feature is not “we’re all the hacker” because that would be a really bad heist.

What I’m saying is balance is subjective, and the DM is allowed to say “that won’t work.” Don’t force anyone to play something they hate, and give people room to play a character they’re enthusiastic about, but if everyone’s first idea is a rogue and that’s not the premise you want to run, you don’t have to. And also, from limited experienced I’ve found that most people either are open to suggestion because they don’t have a specific character in mind and just meant that rogue might be cool, or on the flip side have like ten PCs they’re itching to run and will happily switch to a different one.

3. Other restrictions

This can be practical/mechanical (I asked players to run any unearthed arcana subclasses past me before committing in case they seem super broken), making the DM’s job easier (I asked for no evil characters on the grounds that I don’t know if I can run a mixed evil and good party yet), or just personal preference within reason. I decided to let the players choose their deities if applicable, but I am not going to have all several-hundred deities listed in the D&D published material play major roles so I figure those who are linked to a god can pick theirs and then I’ll come up with a smaller pantheon; someone else might have an idea in mind (eg: the Norse gods) and tell their players they need to pick from that list.

4. Come up with the premise/setting

Once you have some idea of what the players want, there’s your premise.

Things players had brought up: two expressed interest in clerics or multiclassing into cleric. One couldn’t make it but had floated a few suggestions including a rogue. One had an idea for a druid, and one is relatively new to D&D and wasn’t sure. We also talked about settings; I expressed my concerns about running a modern setting but said gaslamp fantasy works okay, and people were generally into something other than Generic High Medieval. Between all of that we settled on a world in the early stages of an industrial revolution that the druid opposes, and full of the social upheavals this kind of economic change causes (it makes the noble background super interesting; it provides some hooks for the religious establishment to get involved; it opens up a lot of room for social encounters which people stressed they wanted a lot of rather than Kill These Rats, You Murderhobo). That’s about all I have now; once the players have their backstory I’ll flesh it out more.

------------------------------------

Obviously you can do what you want, but I will say for session zero a lot of internet advice seemed to trend towards this weird combination of “tell your characters your setting...and then let them create whatever characters they want with no input from each other” when the opposite approach makes way more sense to me!

It’s actually funny: the only reasonably fleshed out campaign premise I’ve ever come up with was a world that had been on the brink of a major industrial revolution that was foiled by unknown seemingly extraplanar forces, went into a relative dark age, and is slowly emerging a few hundred years later and the campaign is to figure out what happened and prevent a relapse into the dark ages (definitely influenced by me taking a walk in a public green space while thinking about D&D and seeing a bunch of lampposts overgrown with vines; probably influenced by my general love of planar stuff and The Vorkosigan Saga and some other sci fi works). Based on what my players were interested in...they might not have enjoyed that, and it’s also great because I get to see the opposite perspective of the players perhaps being the ones doing the foiling, and why they do it! It’s really exciting and it’s going to push me in an interesting way. I had previously toyed with just trying to write stories set in that campaign premise universe, and this will again force me to see multiple perspectives.

[thestarkalypse]

I need to post this.

I wrote the following for Facebook but I don’t want it to live there so congrats, Tumblr! You are the recipient of one Cheetah hot take.

I will preface this by saying that I do not have my comic books with me, specifically the ones by George Perez that feature Cheetah’s origin story (sheltering in place 5 hours away from my comics collection). I am trying my best from memory and I beg ignorance for any holes in my arguments that could otherwise be explained by citing a specific issue or arc.

In Justice League Doom, Batman’s contingency plans for checking the power of every other super in the Justice League are revealed. (The following are not spoilers, go watch JL Doom it’s really good)

Superman, meet Kryptonite

Flash must maintain his tremendous and mighty speed lest he harm himself and those around him.

Green Lantern is tortured by a morbid alternate future he cannot tear himself away from.

Martian Manhunter’s physicality is threatened, both his treasured and necessary ability to hold human form and his actual flesh by an elemental enemy.

Batman, tricked by the League of Doom, his plans stolen from him, falls prey to a spectre from his past.

Wonder Woman fights a bunch of cat women she hallucinates. 

No, not Catwoman in plural, Wonder Woman fights a bunch of women covered in fur with sharp claws and teeth. While the other members of the JL face existential threats, Wonder Woman fights overgrown fucking cats.

And not just any cats, copies of one in particular: her archnemesis Cheetah.

I hereby posit that Cheetah is a lame supervillain archnemesis, potentially one of if not the lamest of the Justice League.

From the outset to a casual observer, Cheetah seems to have been created so that fanboys could watch a literal catfight between two well-toned heteronormative females. She has “womanly” curves, long, flowing hair and feline features in the human sense: sharp and beautiful. The shading of her fur slopes back and forth, sculpting a visually pleasing shape, and her physique is taut and muscular.

Barbara Minerva (Cheetah’s alter ego) in the comics employs a blood curse to take the form of a cheetah lady, aided by a kinda racist attendant who reveres her and serves her in all her physical forms. She is brilliant, incisive and driven, but also exploits a developing culture to help her gain her own ends, usually ending in theft and brutal murder. Minerva doesn’t give a shit about the sanctity of human life. She is personified greed; even if her quest is only for knowledge, she will use blood and force to achieve it. You could say that she loses her humanity in Cheetah, but she never really had it to begin with.

So yeah, she is a foil for Diana, who is all things moral and empathetic. But Diana deserves better. In Perez’s first major arc of the comics, she has the God of War Ares, who spars with her mentally and physically as he threatens Man’s World. In War of the Gods, she has the nefarious sorceress Circe. Wonder Woman faces the pantheon of the Greek gods, Medusa and the brilliant, rich yet bitter Veronica Cale in Greg Rucka’s run (in some way Wonder Woman’s Lex Luthor, though I do not pretend to be a major scholar of Superman). In the sublime Hiketeia, Wonder Woman squares off against Batman himself and trust that it is a MUST READ.

And yet we are told that it is an overgrown cat who is her archnemesis. Does that say something about Cheetah? About Wonder Woman? About us? About George Perez, artists and writers who followed him in comics and animation and now feature film?

So why did I begin by talking about the other supers of the Justice League? Because they get cool ass archnemeses. Not all of them are cool, obviously, but the Joker? The Gotham rogues gallery in general? Lex Luthor? Vandal Savage? Sinestro? Maxwell Lord? Big Bad Darkseid? I like to make fun of Oceanmaster but he wields incredible power and has designs of domination. Barbara Minerva is a small woman, a mortal, who may have an intellectual capacity rivaling Lex Luthor but basically does petty crime that enriches her secret, secluded life. Where is the grandiosity? Where is the imagination? Not here, not with Cheetah.

I could sit here and refute my own points with some deeper thought and contemplation but I want everyone who is only marginally interested in or familiar with Wonder Woman to know that Cheetah is not the evil answer to Wonder Woman’s goodness. She should not be elevated to or be considered as Diana’s equal. She is a Big Bad and a boss, sure, but she is not Diana’s evil OTP. I really hope the movie makes them friends so that Wonder Woman witnesses her downfall and has to HELP her, not just defeat her. That would draw out Diana’s empathy which I believe is one of her greatest assets as a super and is something that Gal Gadot was able to convey in the first film.

That’s all I have off the top of my head in about 15 minutes of writing. Fully welcoming any arguments or discussion!

[mysterylover123]

My Top 10 Christmas Episodes

mysterylover123

Everyone has a favorite Christmas Episode. That time of year from your favorite shows where the characters celebrate the holidays along with you, usually accompanied by big changes in their lives, gaudy decorations, and creative traditions. I’ve included my top 10 here, along with some honorable mentions. I’ve excluded Christmases I liked from book/film/comic book series, thought I think in 2 years time there will be a grand new edition to the list (aka My Hero Academia). Hope you all like them and have a Merry Christmas! 

#10. Futurama “Xmas Story” Airdate: 12/19/1999

I don’t broadcast it much, but I love classic Futurama. This little gem of a Christmas episode - sorry, X-mas episode - is a common staple of “Best Christmas Episode” lists, and for good reason. It’s one of those “dark” Christmas stories, featuring a murderous Santa Claus robot, Fry dealing with being 1000 years in the future where his old traditions have died, and some good bonding moments among the cast of Planet Express. I particularly like the “gift of the Magi” joke with Amy and Hermes, and the Harold Lloyd reference with Fry on the clock tower.  

#9. X-Men Evolution “On Angel’s Wings” Airdate: 12/15/2001

X-Men Evolution is a nostalgic favorite of mine - my introduction to the X-men in high school, the first show I ever read fanfiction for, etc. It’s Christmas episode has a very warm feeling to it, a rare dip into sentimentality for the show. It deals with Scott and Rogue going to recruit Angel for the X-Men while the others are home for the holidays, and clashing with Magneto in their attempts to do so. I’m always down for an episode focused on Rogue, and her bond with Scott over being the X-Men without families to go home to is great. The little montage that ends the episode always puts a smile on my face.

#8. The Simpsons “Holidays of Future Passed”  Airdate: 12/11/2011

I heard this one was thought of as a potential series finale for The Simpsons, as a bit of closure for their premiere (another christmas Episode, “Simpsons Roasting on an Open fire”, which I like but find a little too ‘early Simpsons’ to make the list.). Honestly, I wish it had been. Modern Simpsons is generally such a mess, it would’ve been nice to see it get such a dignified end in Season 23. This one is a great little trip to the future of the family, and it really feels like a nice vision of what could become of them somewhere down the line. I like that this one gives Homer a chance to be a good grandad, and a bonding moment between Lisa and Bart. I hope this is where they really do end up.

#7. Frasier “Frasier Grinch” Airdate: 12/19/1995

Frasier is the only show that ended up landing 2 Christmas episodes in my Top 10. And I felt I still had to cut a few of them that could’ve made the list easily. This series really had a knack for the Christmas episode. My 2nd favorite, obviously, is this little offering from Season 3, which deals with Frasier trying to get Freddy gifts in time for the holiday when the ones he ordered got misdirected. It ends up touching on an aspect of the holidays I wish would get covered a little more often: when you buy others Christmas gifts, are you getting them what they actually want, or just what you think they should want? Overbearing Frasier has made this blunder, and the episode helps him learn that lesson. Though as usual Niles steals the show. Niles in a toy store trying out a doofy hat is more than worth the #7 spot.

#6. Friends “The One with the Christmas in Tulsa” Airdate: 12/12/2002

Friends has a lot of Christmastime episodes, but most of them are just kinda coincidentally set around the holidays. Only a few stand out as actual “Christmas Episodes”. While I enjoy “Holiday Armadillo”’s comedy and “Creepy Holiday card”’s sentimentality, my standout favorite is this one, the last Christmas episode they did, perhaps because Chandler and Monica are my favorites on the show and their romance is the OTP. This one deals with Chandler away from home, working on Christmas at a job he hates and being separated from Monica. Through some clips and a bit of soul searching, he decides to finally quit the job he hates and pursue something he wants to do. It’s a great example of how to do a clip show/Christmas episode well, move characters forward, and remind us of why we love these two together.

#5. Buffy “Amends” Airdate: 12/15/1998

This one would probably be higher if there wasn’t so much Bangel melodrama in the last 10 minutes (sorry fans, I really hate Bangel). But the rest of it is more than good enough to put Buffy’s sole Christmas episode at #5 for me. What I love the most about this one is, well, the ‘amends’ of the title. Xander starts making up for 3 seasons of douchebaggery by being a good friend. Willow makes up with Oz. Buffy makes up with Faith. That latter one puts the biggest smile on my face of the bunch; it’s bittersweet, given what happens, but when Faith shows up on Buffy’s doorstep with presents for her and Joyce, my small Grinch heart grows three sizes each time. Definitely a must-watch.

#4. Parks and Recreation “Christmas Scandal” Airdate: 12/10/2009

Parks and Rec has 3 Christmas episodes and they’re all pretty good. I debated between this one and “Ron and Diane”, but since that one is more about Ron’s award ceremony, I decided to go with Season 2′s. This one is a very “Parks and Rec” kinda Christmas, dealing with Leslie getting involved in a dumb sex scandal, the Parks department putting on a “Winter wonderland” on Lot 48, some dating drama about Ann and Leslie and their boyfriends (At this point, since Ben and Chris weren’t around yet, Mark and Dave), and a very cute hug between a pre-marriage April and Andy. The biggest win in this one is the sheer Christmas atmosphere. It practically glows off the screen.

#3. How I Met Your Mother “False Positive” Airdate: 12/13/2010

HIMYM is another one with a lot of candidates, but “False Positive” really stands out to me as something special. It’s essentially an “It’s a wonderful life”-style story (as they’re going to see the movie) where Lily’s false positive pregnancy test inspires the friend group to each choose the more responsible path in life of their two choices, only to chicken out when the false part of the title is revealed. The way the episode ends is absolutely spectacular, a standout moment to me among the series’ many strong character moments, and leads to strong development for all around going forward. Definitely a highlight of HIMYM’s 6th season, and an episode full of  Christmas imagery, soul-searching, and classic plotlines.

#2. Frasier “The Fight Before Christmas” Airdate: 12/16/1999

My favorite Frasier Christmas episode feels like it combines a little bit of everything that makes the other ones good: a KACL office Christmas party with a whacky theme (we finally see it instead of having it going on in the background!), Frasier being pompous about Christmas celebrations and ending up karmically punished for it, a comedic scenario which crafts a comedy of errors, Martin’s decorating. In many ways though, the highlight of this one is how deftly it handles the romance reveal from the previous episode between Niles and Daphne. in the midst of all the crappy Christmas rom coms, it’s easy to forget how strong a good Christmas set romance can be, and the moment of tension as Daphne tries to reject Niles but just can’t quite do it is a standout for me. Definitely my favorite of Frasier’s 8 xmas episodes.

Hon. Mentions: Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire, Batman Christmas with the Joker and Holiday Knights, Frasier Perspectives on Christmas, Parks and Rec Ron and Diane, HIMYM How Lily Stole Christmas.

#1. Smallville “Lexmas” Airdate: 12/8/2005

This one isn’t just a Christmas episode. It’s pretty much the Ultimate Christmas episode. Where to begin? A fancy Christmas party jam-packed with colorful decor. Superman - Clark - delivering presents as Santa for the Daily Planet. Clark talking/saving a depressed mall Santa (or is he real?) from committing suicide with an emotional heart to heart. Sweet family Christmas  celebrations (right before tragedy strike in the next episode). But of course, the real highlight of this one is Lex’s Alternate Reality fantasy. After getting shot, the titular Luthor has a vision of what his life could be like if he did the right thing, essentially an “It’s a Wonderful Life” style alternate reality. However, that reality ends in tragedy, and the tragic twist of the episode is that instead of leading the Grinch’s heart to grow, the Christmas dream only serves to help solidify Luthor’s fall to the dark side. It is certainly juxtaposed with enough holiday magic and hope to offset that depressing ending, but I will admit to liking a bit of subversion in my stories now and then. Everything Christmas episodes could have is jam-packed into this episode. 

[asterythm]

A is for Amour || The Way The Cookie Crumbles (8)

Pairings: Slow burn Logicality, endgame Prinxiety Word Count: 8k Chapter Summary: Logan tries some sweet treats, which uncovers some truths that taste just a little more bitter. Chapter Warnings: food, and... thaaaat’s about it. Think of this chapter as a nice, long reprieve from all the angst I’ve been putting you through :)

<< First Chapter || < Previous Chapter || Read this chapter on AO3

For all the comfort it offered Logan, the predictable routine of school could get awfully dull sometimes. 

The first half of the day had looked exactly like any other. He’d arrived precisely ten minutes before the bell. Attended two hour-long classes, but between the two of them spent less than half an hour actually listening (he knew all the material already, why bother?). 

Now, he was on his way to the most predictable part of the day yet: lunch, which he typically spent in the library studying instead of eating (Logan was a firm believer in the superiority of several small meals rather than three big ones). With a worn Science textbook in one hand, his sleek laptop in the other, and a dark blue water bottle clamped securely against his side, Logan could not have been following his mundane script more closely if he’d tried.

Until he turned the corner, that is, and almost ran straight into a boy coming out of the Tech and Home Ec hall.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!” 

All too quickly, Logan recognized the speaker. He fought the urge to roll his eyes. “That’s quite alright, Patton.”

“Huh…? Oh, hey, Logan!” As Patton spoke, a slight flush began to spread across his cheeks. Logan noted the colouration with curiosity; had he been running in the halls, or was there some other force at work here that Logan was somehow oblivious to? “Fancy seeing you here! I mean, what a surprise, am I right?”

“I don’t know if I would call it a surprise , per say, considering I do attend this school and all,” was Logan’s dry response. “That said, although I was expecting for the two of us to eventually run into each other here, I never thought that it would be in quite so literal a fashion.”

Logan didn’t realize his mistake until he saw Patton’s entire face immediately lit up with delight. 

Oh sh— 

“Did you just make a dad joke?”

“Never! ...Intentionally,“ Logan begrudgingly amended, cursing his sorry mouth. What had he been thinking, letting slip such foolishness as that? He was going to lose his student’s respect! 

He made a mental note to confront his own dad about this later. The prolonged exposure to bad jokes must have finally begun contaminating his cognition; a hypothesis evidenced by, say, the strange way his student seemed to be vibrating before his very eyes.

Wait, no. Pushing his glasses up on his nose, Logan did a double take. That was no illusion. Patton was literally vibrating. What — how is that even physically possible?

While Logan puzzled over this new development, Patton continued to talk, and his words only confirmed Logan’s fears. “Man, this is so weird.” A good-natured laugh. “I mean, I knew that you had to have a sense of humour somewhere in there, obviously, but still. Hearing you make a joke in person like this? I never thought I’d see the day!”

The situation was not looking good. Logan could almost see his dignity disappearing, figurative grains of fine sand on a figurative beach, running through his figurative fingers at an alarming rate as he fumbled for a way to excuse himself from the conversation.

Or at least change the subject. It was with that thought that his eyes fell, for the first time, onto the plate in Patton’s hands.

Logan wasn’t sure how he hadn’t seen — or, more importantly, smelled — it any earlier. Covering nearly the entire surface of the ceramic plate was a variety of freshly baked, delicious-looking thumbprint cookies, arranged artfully to resemble petals on a flower of some sort. In the centre of each cookie was a spoonful or so of what was undeniably Crofter’s. And judging by the richness of their aroma, these cookies had probably only just come out of the oven a few minutes ago. 

Had Logan been years younger, he likely would have been salivating at the very smell. But of course, he was too mature to submit to such temptations now. Obviously.

With considerable effort, Logan tore his gaze away from the plate.

“I see you have still more cookies today,” he observed out loud. “Tell me, do you make it a habit to always carry baked goods with you?”

“Ah — yeah, heh, I just came from Home Ec,” replied the younger boy, almost sheepish as he followed Logan’s gaze. “Today was a baking day, and I got a little carried away and accidentally made too many, so I got Mx. Harper’s permission to borrow a plate and pass them out around the school.” 

“Fascinating. I didn’t realize you enjoyed baking.” Logan’s eyebrows raised, genuine interest animating his features. “Is that a hobby that you often engage in?”

“Yeah, I think it’s really amazing what baking can do! Like, I wanna meet the guy who looked at a loaf of bread and thought — ” Patton adopted a gruff tone — “Ya know what this needs? More sugar and eggs!” He giggled, dropping the voice. “I mean, the ingredients are so plain on their own. Sugar, butter, flour… who woulda thought that they could work together to come up with something oodles better than what you started with? And then you get to eat it! Or else you get to brighten up someone else’s day with it, which is somehow even better. Who doesn’t like eating a whole bunch of sweet stuff, am I right?

“It’s a funny thing, really. You’d think that with all the measuring and stuff, I’d be nervous about getting numbers mixed up, but… it’s actually kind of the opposite. All the numbers that I need to see are marked up on the measuring cups or spoons, so I don’t have to worry about getting them wrong. I don’t even have to think of them as numbers! I just imagine I’m playing one of those memory games where you have to match — um, match cards with...” 

Abruptly, Patton stopped, seeming to have suddenly become aware of himself. Eye contact broke as he cleared his throat. “Sorry, I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

“No, no! Well, yes, a little bit, but it’s quite alright. Truth be told, I don’t mind,” said Logan, surprising both Patton and himself with his sincerity. He was actually enjoying Patton’s chatter today; he’d never before heard the simple act of baking described so vividly. And, if he was being completely honest — Patton’s passion was invigorating after such a monotonous day.

“Wait, really?” Patton cocked his head to the side, appearing as if he could hardly believe his ears. “I’m… not annoying you?”

“Not in the slightest.”

Logan watched as the hopeful gleam slowly returned to Patton’s blue eyes. ( Huh. Blue. Logan hadn’t even noticed how bright those eyes were until now; they were always obscured behind Patton’s glasses, he supposed.) The freckled boy opened his mouth. Closed it. Then, hurriedly, he opened it again and spoke up.

“If that’s the case, then...” Patton raised the plate slightly. “I was about to head into the foyer to hand these out, but since you’re already here, would you maybe want to be the first to give one of these a try?”

Why, Patton, how charitable of you to extend such an offer! Yes, I most certainly would like a thumbprint cookie, thank you very much. How did you know these are my favourite? Truly, what a kind and generous soul you are.

 …is exactly what Logan did not say. 

Though his immediate instinct was to say yes and grab one of the buttery, jam-filled sweets (it was Crofter’s, after all!), Logan was also acutely aware that he was very much not where he should be at the moment; he should have been seated in one of the library’s quiet work cubicles long ago, chipping away at a decently sizable pile of homework. But no — instead, he was here, chatting up a storm with this bouncing-energy-ball of a boy and throwing down dad jokes like there was no tomorrow. Taking a cookie would mean even less time spent being productive, especially since no food was allowed in the library. And hadn’t Logan already wasted enough time today? 

Then again…

Logan supposed there was another way of looking at the situation, and that was this: seeing as Logan was already behind schedule, he might as well forget all about schedules and routines and so forth, if only for one day. Let himself take a breather. Enjoy a cookie for a change. In light of all the time he had already wasted today, taking off one or two minutes more to have a quick snack could hardly make that much of a difference, could it?

Still Logan hesitated in his deliberation over the age-old question: punctuality… or Crofter’s? It could go either way, really; Logan held both options in an equally high regard. Whatever decision he made, though, he’d have to make it fast — going back and forth like this was the least effective time usage of them all. 

A tiebreaker, then, Logan finally decided. Pointing to one of the cookies, he asked Patton, “What kind of jam is that in the centre there?”

“That one, I think, is… hmm. Let me see.” Patton squinted. “I’m pretty sure that that one is blackberry and pomegranate.”

“Well then!” That settled it — knowing now that his favourite flavour was among the many types of jam, Logan couldn’t not take one. Passing up blackberry-pomegranate Crofter’s was simply not an option. “That’s very kind of you, Patton. I can assure you I’d appreciate nothing more.” So saying, Logan moved to snag a cookie off the plate.

…Before realizing, a little too late, that both his hands were full. Awkwardly, Logan tried to bend down so he could gently drop his textbook on the floor, but fumbled it in midair so it hit the ground with a heavy thump instead. As he reflexively reached for it, his water bottle slipped out from underneath his arm. Logan watched in exasperation as the rogue bottle rolled down the hall, carrying the rest of Logan’s dignity with it, before finally bumping to a stop several feet away.

Well, at least his hands were free. 

Though his cheeks were burning, Logan was able to take comfort in the delicious-smelling plate of baked goods being presented to him. “Thank you very much, Patton, for your generosity,” Logan said, grabbing the cookie he’d wanted off the plate and trying hard to pretend that he hadn’t just made an utter fool of himself (again).

Patton, to his credit, had the good grace not to comment on Logan’s embarrassing moment. The younger boy beamed as he replied, “It’s no problem at all! I love sharing the food I make.” 

That seemed to be the end of the conversation. With a nod, Logan went to scoop up his belongings, then turned to leave, eager to get out of there and put all of his recent buffoonery behind him. 

He could feel Patton’s eyes following him as he went. 

Sure enough, just before he turned the next corner to draw himself out of sight, Logan was stopped in his tracks by the sound of Patton crying out: “Wait! Wait, Logan, don’t go!”

Ugh, so close, Logan thought, debating whether he should pretend as if he hadn’t heard Patton or not. But he was starting to find that the boy was cleverer than he looked, and most likely wouldn’t be fooled — only hurt. 

Logan turned to see Patton staring after him, one hand stretched out in his direction, mouth hanging slightly ajar. “I’m sorry, do you need something else from me, Patton?”

He was trying to keep the irritation out of his voice — he really was! But judging by the way Patton’s reaching fingers drooped, Logan couldn’t have been too successful. 

“I just, uh…” Patton fumbled, seeming uncertain, as if even he didn’t know what had compelled him to call out like that. After a moment of stammering, he gestured vaguely at the cookie Logan now held. “I was... hoping that you could maybe take a bite of that right now. So I could get your feedback, you know? Because, um, I’m always looking for new ways to improve my baking, and… stuff. No pressure or anything, but I would —” In his doubt, Patton’s voice cracked. He coughed, then took a deep breath before completing his thought all in a rush of words: “I would really, really love to see what you think right as you’re taking the first bite, because that’s always the most genuine reaction. If that makes sense. I’m sorry, does that make any sense? Sorry.” As he finished speaking, Patton looked away with a slight cringe, as if already expecting a ‘no’.

Oh. That’s it? Logan’s shoulders lifted in an indifferent shrug — it was a simple enough request, after all — as he laid his belongings back down, save for the small thumbprint cookie at the core of all of this fuss and nonsense. “Very well.” 

(The surprised smile he received in response was almost blinding in its brightness. Which seemed to Logan a disproportionate amount of excitement, but who was he to judge?)

With practiced precision, Logan bit the sweet treat almost perfectly in half to ensure the optimal jam-to-cookie ratio. Then, thoughtfully, he began to chew. 

Understand, now: Logan was no food critic. But the young man had eaten enough thumbprint cookies in his life to know what he liked and what he disliked. And, well… 

Patton’s baking, suffice it to say, easily fell on the “liking” side.

From what little Logan knew about the crumbly confection, thumbprint cookies were a relatively simple recipe to prepare. He’d even tried to bake a few of his own once. He’d set off the smoke alarm and startled his fathers half to death in the process, sure, yet still they had come out of the oven edible enough. The ingredients were simple, too: some butter. Brown sugar. Eggs. All-purpose flour, half a teaspoon of vanilla extract, a pinch of salt, a couple of walnuts for garnish, and of course, a spoonful (sometimes more) of Crofter’s jam in the middle of it all. Mix it all together, and bam! He had himself a delectable (albeit slightly burnt) dessert.

Patton’s cookies, though… they were on a whole other level. Objectively speaking, Logan wasn’t sure if it would be fair to call this ‘the best thumbprint cookie he’d ever had in his entire life’, but only because it was quite an impossible judgement to make; there were too many factors he’d have to take into consideration and at the moment, Logan cared to consider nothing more than the flavours of butter and vanilla and Crofter’s-blackberry-and-pomegranate jam exploding across his tongue. 

The cookie was soft and powdery, but not so much so that there was no texture to it. The sugar levels were perfect — neither too sweet nor too bland. The vanilla extract underscored all the other flavours with a richness that was noticeable but not overpowering. 

And the Crofter’s. 

Good gracious, the Crofter’s. 

Logan didn’t even remember putting the other half of the cookie in his mouth until he was already swallowing. 

“So?” Patton’s voice, equal parts flustered, agitated, and excited, snapped Logan back to reality. “Is it — is it okay? Did I do good? Oh, no, wait, did I overdo the butter? I was worried about that but by the time I realized that I might have put in too much it was already mixed in and I couldn’t exactly reach in and pull it out of the batter anym—”

“Patton,” Logan broke in softly.

The boy seemed to choke. “Um. Yes?”

“I… That was…” 

For the first time in forever, Logan found himself at a loss for words. Praise never really had been his strong suit to begin with; now, the ever-logical boy wasn’t even certain he possessed the vocabulary to describe what he was feeling inside. He cast about for adjectives, eventually landing on the first one to come to mind:

“... adequate. Thank you.”

For some reason, no sooner than the words left his mouth, Patton visibly deflated. Huh? Logan had given a compliment, hadn’t he? So why did the person on the receiving end appear so upset?

“Oh. ‘Adequate.’ Okay… There’s, um, there’s some room for improvement there, huh?” Patton said, managing a weak laugh.

Logan’s eyebrows shot up at the sound of it. “Ah, no — no no no. You misunderstand, Patton, I didn’t mean to imply your baking to somehow be ‘barely enough’. I thought it was delicious, actually. Very impressive.” 

"Do you really mean that, though?” 

“Do you think I would lie to you?” replied Logan. “I meant what I said, and I said what I meant. You have a remarkably high degree of skill. The jam-to-cookie ratio? Simply divine! And don’t even get me started on...” As Logan continued to speak, matter-of-factly listing off the good things he’d noticed as he ate, he gestured with his free hand to help articulate his points. And with every wave of his wrist, the dejected boy before him seemed to perk up a little more. Patton was positively glowing by the time Logan finished.

It took him a moment to find his voice, though. “Logan, I can’t believe…” And when he did, it was barely above a whisper. “That’s — that was so nice.”

Logan began to reply before stopping and squinting carefully. Were those tears in Patton’s eyes? “Patton, are you okay?”

“More than okay. I just…” Patton paused, composed himself. “You just caught me off guard; no one’s ever said so much about my baking. Or anything I do, really. So, it — um, it means a lot. Especially coming from someone like you.”

Logan wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Was he supposed to apologise? No, Patton appeared to be happy, if a little overwhelmed. So… what, did that mean, then? Should he try to come up with something else to talk about? Or perhaps he was supposed to exit the conversation now. He’d done what Patton had requested, after all, and Patton seemed to be satisfied with the results. Plus, if he wanted to get any work done this period, now was probably the time to do so.

(Ugh, Logan thinks. This is exactly why I try to avoid social interaction.)

Luckily, he was spared from having to make the decision when Patton went ahead and made it for him. Whether or not that was because Patton had taken notice of Logan’s unease, the older boy wasn’t certain, but he was grateful nonetheless. 

The boy with the cookies gave Logan a crooked smile as he said, “I won’t hold you up any longer. You’ve probably got somewhere to be right now. You were on your way to the library when I interrupted you, right?” 

Logan’s surprise must have shown on his face, because Patton chuckled. Balancing the plate of cookies on one hand, he pointed at Logan’s laptop and Science textbook with the other. 

“I noticed you had a bunch of homework-related stuff with you, and since the library is really close to the Home Ec corridor, I thought…” He shrugged.

“I — well, you thought right. Quite an astute observation, Patton.”

“Didn’t think I was capable of drawing inferences like that, did ya?”

Logan blinked. “I’m almost even more surprised that you knew and accurately utilised the word inferences,” he confessed.

“I know big words too! Sssssaxophone…” Patton began to number off items on his fingers before seeming to remember what he’d been saying. “Anyway, I’ll let you go now, Logan. These cookies aren’t gonna hand themselves out.”

Logan nodded. A quick glance at his watch told him that if he left for the library now, he’d have just enough time to finish reading the textbook pages he needed to go over, and perhaps if he really hurried he would be able to get started on the review questions as well. “I suppose I’ll see you around then.”

“Yep! Uh, before you leave, though, did you maybe want to grab another cookie?” asked Patton. “Help yourself, I’ve got plenty. Enough that I probably won’t even be able to get rid of all of these by the end of the break, and I don’t think that Mrs. Lauren would like it very much if I showed up to Math class with a whole bunch of leftovers and nowhere to put them.” Patton held out the plate again as he spoke, genuinely hopeful. He wasn’t just offering out of courtesy, apparently; for whatever reason, Patton really did want Logan to have another one (or two or four).

And, looking at the wonderful variety of Crofter’s jam still on display and free for the taking, Logan would have hated to disappoint.

“If you insist…”

***

Silverware clinked against silverware in the Berrys’ dining room that evening, softly punctuating the amicable chatter drifting back and forth between bites of their meal. Well, it was mostly Logan’s dad who was doing the chatting, to be fair; his pop always had been the quieter of the pair.

That wasn’t to say that Logan and his pop never spoke, of course. In fact, every night, without fail, his pop would ask the same thing: “Anything interesting happen at school today?” 

An invitation to talk. Not a command. His pop always gave him a choice, a fact which Logan was not ungrateful for; the amount of mutual respect between father and son in his family wasn’t exactly the norm, he knew, and he loved them dearly for it. 

Most nights, Logan’s choice was to politely decline with a vague statement — no no, nothing much, same old same old... Neither Logan’s pop nor his dad would push for any more details after that; their teen kid needed his privacy, after all. The conversation would quickly return to Seth and Toby’s comfortable back-and-forth, with Logan occasionally jumping in where he saw fit, all the way until their plates were empty and their stomachs full. One of them would bring the dishes to the sink and wash them. Someone else would wipe the table. The last person remaining packed up the leftovers, and life went on as normal.

Not tonight, though. 

At first, Logan hadn’t considered his lunch-hour conversation with Patton to be anything really worth noting; it was a break from his regular schedule, for sure, but the strange, stammering exchange didn’t exactly count as life-changing (although the cookies might have been). Yet as the day dragged on, he found his thoughts drifting back to that same conversation over and over and over again. It was only after the final bell of the day had already sounded that Logan understood why.

As gratifying as it had been to see Patton so pleased after receiving Logan’s feedback, the logical-minded boy couldn’t help but feel like Patton had responded with a disproportionate amount of enthusiasm when he took into consideration the minimal amount of praise he’d actually given. Patton may not have cried, but Logan could recall seeing tears brimming in Patton’s eyes and knew that the boy had definitely come close! 

That said, though… just as he’d previously acknowledged, emotions were definitely not Logan’s strong suit. So had Patton’s reaction truly been an overreaction, or — as could very well be the case — was Logan just even less skilled at reading people than he thought? 

In order to properly figure out what had happened at lunch, Logan would need a second opinion. 

He could think of no better candidates than his fathers. 

Logan trusted his dad and pop more than anyone else in the world. Both were incredibly clever people — not to mention compassionate, kind, and patient. If anyone could help him work this question of his out, it would be them.

So when pop asked Logan the usual question, anything interesting happen at school today?, Logan gathered his thoughts and responded, “Actually, yes.”

His parents hadn't been expecting that — Logan could tell from the way that the two of them paused, his dad’s fork still halfway to his open mouth and a stalk of celery speared on its tongs. Toby ignored it in favour of making eye contact with his husband. As something unspoken passed between them, Logan watched on in… not quite amusement, but something like that. 

He’d always thought it curious that his fathers shared a strong enough bond to be able to hold full conversations using only facial expressions. In fact, had Logan not so often seen these conversations in action first-hand, he likely wouldn’t have believed it possible. With the English language — and indeed, any other language in the world — as intricately put together as it was, the idea that one might need no language at all to communicate seemed almost fantastical in nature.

And yet...

The first time that Logan had noticed his fathers staring silently at each other across the room like this, the then-much-younger boy had put down his toy train immediately and wandered over to tug on his pop’s sleeve. Pop, he'd asked, why are you looking at dad all weird? 

To which Seth had scooped the boy up onto his lap, replying with an affectionate smile: Oh, we’re just having a little chat, little Lo.

No you’re not! You're not talking at all! Logan had insisted with a surprising amount of vehemence. If you're talking, how come your mouths aren’t moving, huh? You’re just making silly faces at each other, and that's that. He had sat up straight on his father’s lap as he finished talking, proud of his amazing powers of observation.

On the other side of the room, Dad chuckled. Well, yes, it’s true that usually people talk with their mouths, but your pop and I are special. You know why, Logan?

Curiosity piqued at the sly expression on his father’s face, Logan had asked, Why?

A conspiratorial whisper: Because we’ve got superpowers!

What? No way, those aren't real! ...Are they?

Are too. Your pop and I, we can talk to each other by using our brainwaves to send these, uh.... these super-special, super-secret mental messages. But don’t tell anyone, okay?

Dad, that’s so cool! I wanna learn how to do men… mint tall… minty messages, too! Logan had slid right off of his pop’s legs and bounded over to the other side of the living room as fast as his chubby little legs could carry him. Eyes wide and shining as he looked up at his dad, Logan had asked, Can you teach me how to do the minty messages?

In answer, Toby had reached out and hoisted his young son up to sit on the couch next to him, fondly mussing up Logan's hair a little before looking him very seriously in the eye. Are you sure you’re ready to learn, Logan? The ancient art of my minty messages is a very important practice that goes way back, all the way to your great, great, great, many-greats grandmother… Darth Vader.

He'd puffed out his cheeks. Come on, dad, be serious! he scoffed (as well as a four-year-old boy could scoff, anyway). You can't trick me — Darth Vader's not my granny. Or else we'd all have lightsabers and live on the moon. The boy nodded to himself, completely satisfied with his irrefutable logic.

You’re right, you’re right. Always keeping me in check, aren't you, pipsqueak? A loving pinch caused Logan to dissolve into a fit of giggles. When he calmed down, dad told him, Okay, you passed my test. I’m going to tell you the secret to sending my minty messages ... 

Logan had held his breath as his dad bent down to whisper. The secret , he confessed, is love.

The young analyst’s face had instantly scrunched up in confusion. Love? How does that work?

Well, you see, piped up pop, jumping back into the conversation as he saw where his husband was taking it, your dad and I love each other very much — more than we love anything else in the entire world!

(Except maybe Halloween, Toby said under his breath.)

So we have a very special connection that lets us talk to each other even when we’re not saying anything. This is very serious magic, Logan. It doesn’t just instantly appear at first sight; it takes time, and it takes work. And it might be a long time before you meet someone willing to work for it with you, but don’t worry if that’s the case, kiddo — I promise that one day, you will meet someone who loves and understands you so much that you can talk to them with just one look. 

Every connection looks different, by the way, added Toby. Your pop and I share one kind of love, but there’s a whole bunch of different types out there that are all just as good! Maybe the person who you grow close to will be a really, really good friend. Maybe they’ll be something a little different than friends. Maybe they won’t just be one person, but lots! Whoever they might be, though, your whole life is gonna change when you find ‘em.

And then I’ll be able to make the minty messages?

A fond chuckle. And then you’ll be able to make the minty messages. I promise.  

Though Logan typically did his best to forget about how badly he’d butchered the word ‘mental’, those last sentences had stuck with the boy as he grew older. Through the years, he would find comfort in the promise of someday having someone by his side who he could talk to without struggle — who’d take the time to listen to him — who’d take the time to understand him. 

Recently, though, he’d been wondering if maybe it was too good to be true… as someone inexperienced both in giving and receiving love, it was difficult to imagine any reason that anyone should put up with Logan for even a second longer than they needed to.

And yet in spite of it all, Logan knew he’d never stop hoping to meet someone who would care for him as deeply as his fathers cared for each other. Though he had long since stopped actively searching for a friend as true as the one his dad had described, he doubted he’d ever be able to shake the idea for good (so deep did Logan’s trust in his fathers run, he’d believe blindly and without hesitation even the most outlandish of promises coming from one of them).

In the meantime, though, Logan had someone else on his mind: not the best friend of his dreams, perhaps, but considering how glad they’d seemed to see him, they might as well have been. Logan waited for his fathers to finish their silent discussion so he could continue. 

He didn’t need to wait much. With both dad and pop beyond thrilled to be granted this rare glimpse into their son’s thoughts, it wasn’t long before both sets of eyes turned to face him. “Well, go right ahead then. Tell us what’s on your mind,” Logan’s dad said, trying to conceal his eagerness by keeping his tone even. 

It didn’t quite work, but Logan appreciated the effort.

“I saw my student Patton Foley at school for the first time today. During lunch hour. It… well, suffice it to say, it was an interesting encounter. And admittedly a little confusing.” Logan paused.

“Mhm?” Resting his chin in the palm of his hand, Seth’s thoughtful nodding prompted his son to go on. “And why’s that, huh?”

“Because it seems that each time I see Patton, he becomes a completely different person,” Logan began. “The way his personality just keeps rapidly developing so unpredictably, well… I can’t say it’s bad, but odd is a good word for it. The first time I met him at the library, for example, he was — how do I describe this?”

“With adjectives,” Toby supplied helpfully. 

“Ah. Well then: disorganised, bothersome, and incompliant , to name a few. He had trouble focusing and listening, and was apparently unaware of what a nuisance his obnoxiously cheerful chatter must have been to everyone around us. It was only after I gave him a stern talking to that he managed to stay quiet for long enough that I could get out full sentences without being interrupted.”

His dad grimaced. “Sounds like a real piece of work.”

“Yes, that’s what I thought too. But you see, during our second session it was like he did a complete one-eighty. He listened attentively, but I barely heard his voice even once, besides right at the beginning of our session when he was apologising for being late. Which was nice at first, until it became apparent we’d wasted half the session because he was too shy to ask questions. I don’t think I saw him smile a single time either.”

“Huh… how about the third session?”

“Well, I didn’t get a headache for once, so interpret that how you’d like?” Logan shrugged. “I mean, he was very polite, which of course was an improvement. And he somehow managed to show up at the library even earlier than I did. His focus once we got down to business was unprecedented, he asked questions when he was confused just like I’d told him to do, he was… to put it simply, I don’t think it would be much of a stretch to call that specific version of Patton a ‘model student’. Where it came from, I haven’t the foggiest. I can only hope I’ll get to see it again.

“Then finally, there was today. I… still haven’t quite wrapped my head around today’s Patton, to be frank. He laughed freely, he seemed comfortable to just chat, and he even offered me some delicious thumbprint cookies that he had just finished baking! There were still moments where he appeared to be nervous, yes, but they were few and far between, and somehow felt different — like a completely separate kind of nervous. Mostly, he seemed to simply be… happy.”

At the last word, Logan’s pop perked up hopefully. “Well, that’s good, right?”

"Too happy,” amended Logan. “I mean falling-all-over-himself-with-glee kind of happy. I complimented his baking, sure, but hardly sugarcoated anything, so it seemed odd that he would take it to heart so much. That’s why I’m telling you all this, I guess — I’m hoping that you can help me figure the boy out!”

As Logan finished his explanation, he suddenly became aware his food must be growing cold. He hadn’t been expecting to talk so much, or for so long, but Logan supposed his words had gotten away from him and he’d begun… 

Rambling. 

Perhaps all of the prolonged Patton-exposure was having more of an impact on his behaviour than Logan had thought. 

The good news was, neither of his fathers minded his long-windedness very much. Or at all, in fact. It wasn’t often that they had their son open up to them so thoroughly, and with so little prompting to boot. Seth and Toby intended to make the most of every second of this little advice session.

The bad news? Neither had any idea where to start.

Nevertheless, Logan’s fathers were determined to try. Toby began by asking for more details. “So… freshly baked cookies, huh?” he started, trying for a conversational tone (with dubious results). “Could I hear a little more about that? I mean, I kind of know what structure you guys like to follow during your tutoring sessions, but at lunch anything goes, so the only way I’m going to get an idea of what happened today is if you tell me directly.” Logan’s dad was careful to use phrases like could I and if you as he spoke, subtle reminders that Logan was under no kind of obligation to share any of these details if he didn’t want to. Sure, they would be helpful in ‘figuring out’ Patton, but Logan’s privacy and comfort was the priority here. 

It turned out that Toby really had no need to be so careful with his word choice, though; amazingly, Logan didn’t hesitate before blazing right on ahead. He must be really determined to work this thing out, marvelled Toby. He couldn’t for the life of him remember the last time that Logan had spoken so freely about personal matters like this.

“Of course — today, during lunch, I was on my way to the library like usual to get some work finished early, but I had taken a detour and so I was a few minutes delayed.” Logan recounted the events of the afternoon so methodically, his dad couldn’t help but wonder if he’d been rehearsing this. “During this time, I assume, Patton was in his Home Economics classroom loading up a plate full of extra cookies he had just finished baking. I just happened to be passing by the Tech and Home Ec wing when Patton came out as well. We narrowly avoided collision, then naturally got to chatting as he recognized me, and I, him. It was then that I accidentally made a p—”

Logan’s eyes widened. 

“I mean, uh…”

“Sorry, you accidentally made a what?” His pop’s head was tilted at a slight angle, the very image of innocence and curiosity. “I didn’t quite catch that last bit, you kind of trailed off.” 

Oh my goodness, he’s really going to make me say it, isn’t he. Logan pressed his lips together, staring up at the ceiling as if it might provide some sort of escape from the hole he’d accidentally dug himself into, before ducking his head and shamefully finishing his sentence. “I accidentally made a… pun.”

The delighted gasp that followed, Logan couldn’t say he wasn’t expecting, but it certainly didn’t sting any less for it.

“You made a — Logan! That’s my boy!” On the other side of the table, Logan heard rather than saw his dad light up. “Grab the camera, Seth, this is a moment for the scrapbook. No, forget the scrapbook, I’m going to carve a plaque to commemorate this day! I’ll do it, I swear. Just watch me!”

“Yep, okay, thanks dad,” Logan sighed, very much wishing he could bury his head in the floorboards. “More to the point, that’s, uh, that’s pretty much how Patton reacted. He noticed it right away, even before I did, and just started laughing and laughing — but not in a mean-spirited sort of way. As if he was laughing with me, not at me, if that makes sense. Except I wasn’t laughing. But that’s not important.” Logan gave his wrist a flick, as if batting away the irrelevant dialogue. “Anyway, I wanted to change the subject after that. For obvious reasons. So I asked him about the thumbprint cookies on his plate, and he offered me one. And I was going to say no, really, since I had work to do, but — well, by then a pretty decent amount of time had already passed us by.” A brief pause. “Not to mention... they were baked with Crofter’s. So, you know, I could hardly say no.”

Both fathers nodded knowingly at that. (The fondness for the fruit spread ran in the family; had either of them been in Logan’s shoes, they would have done the same.) “Go on.”

Logan obliged, walking his fathers through the rest of the lunch period in a similarly systematic fashion. “...so there you have it,” he finally concluded. “I made some humiliating mistakes and gave him a compliment or two; in return, Patton very nearly cried with joy. I mean, who knew that such buffoonery would bear fruit so — so divine?”

“Bear fruit , huh?” His pop pointed a cheeky finger. ”Dad joke?”

“Never mind, this was a mistake.”

"Wait, no! I’ll be serious, I swear. Look, maybe, uh...” Seth trailed off as he realized he didn’t know what he was getting at. “Maybe —“

“Maybe the poor kid’s just so used to hearing you lecture him like a mean old teacher that a handful of nice words were enough to make his day,” supplied Toby, not too seriously. “Back off a little bit, eh? Else, he’s gonna start thinking you hate him, and you’ll have no one but yourself to blame...”

“Wh — Toby!”

“I’m joking, relax! Logan, you know I’m just joking, right?”

No answer.

“Lo?”

“Actually...” Logan began. 

Because joking or not, there was a ring of truth to his dad’s words. 

Maybe he was being too hard on Patton. It made sense: earlier today, Patton had said that Logan’s compliment meant a lot ‘coming from someone like you’. Logan hadn’t quite understood the implications at the time, but… 

Someone cold. Someone distant. Someone unfriendly, someone who never even gave friendship a thought, someone who spat in the very face of it. Someone like me. That was how he was perceived by most people, wasn’t it? Which, up until now, had been all well and good with him.

So why did the thought that Patton might share the same sentiments make him feel so bad?

Before Logan could answer that question, his dad’s concerned voice broke into his thoughts. “Logan? Logan, bud, please don’t be mad, I really was just messing with you! I didn’t mean to imply I know how to do your job better than —”

“What I was going to say was, I think you might be onto something, dad,” Logan interrupted.

“I... huh? What do you mean?”

But once again, there was no answer. Logan was already deep in thought as he picked up his fork to resume eating, effectively ending the conversation — much to the very vocal confusion of his dad.

(His husband eventually quieted his loud protests when he laid a hand on his shoulder, quietly murmuring, “Give it up, love, you won’t get through to him like this. Look.” Seth nodded to their son. “See? He’s already tuned you out. You know what happens when Logan gets an idea in his head; he just takes it and runs with it, that boy does, and…”)

Something in his mind clearly set Patton apart from others, Logan knew; now, if he could only figure out what , perhaps he’d have his answer. 

Well, he knew who he was in Patton’s eyes, at least. Maybe it was time to reflect on the reverse.

Where Logan was cold, Patton was warm. Logan was distant; Patton, approachable. Kind. Willing to change. Friendly, and really genuinely interested in making friends, it seemed. In other words, Patton was — 

Everything I wish to be —

— everything Logan was not, that is. And wasn’t that just something strange?

(Nodding, Toby finished his husband’s sentence: “…once he’s in the zone, there’s hardly anything that can get him out,” he said, laughing a little at himself. “You’re right. As always. How do you do that?”)

This could nicely explain why Logan felt he wasn’t being as effective as possible in his teaching, as well. He’d been approaching these sessions all wrong; he’d been teaching based on how he’d like to learn, rather than what Patton actually needed.

Logan was a student of measurements, after all — of facts, and figures, and careful calculations. But when it came to Patton, he could only guess. And guess what?... Logan did not like guessing games.

He’d need to, though. He’d need to figure out Patton’s own learning style, instead of trying to force the boy to conform to his own, if he ever wanted this tutoring arrangement to work. 

(Seth shrugged. “It’s pretty simple, hon, I just spend less time talking and more time watching. I mean, how lucky am I to have a husband who can take care of the chatter for me?”)

And to do that, Logan would need to step way out of his own comfort zone. How could he ever properly understand his student if he wasn’t willing to contribute a little companionship himself? 

Efficiency be damned — Logan was going to do his job, and he was going to do it properly. And if that meant he’d need to put in a little extra work to figure out how to achieve a healthy balance between both schooling and sympathy, then so be it!

(“Goodness gracious me, you really are perfect,” sighed Toby. “Promise me you’ll never change.”)

To be quite frank, Logan probably should have drawn this conclusion a lot sooner. Had he not only recently been reading those fascinating articles about positive and negative reinforcement? 

In Patton’s specific case, yes, achieving a close and intimate emotional connection was without a doubt the best way to create an ideal learning environment because of how emotional the boy was — but the strict and unkind way that Logan had been approaching his sessions wouldn’t have worked even if he had been paired with someone much less touchy-feely, he realized now. 

Time and time and time again it had been proven that when it came to motivation via either offering a reward for good behaviour and threatening a punishment for undesirable behaviour, the reward almost always worked out better for the subject in the long run. Didn’t that mean that praising a student when they did well would be ultimately much more effective than scolding the same student for failing to understand a concept? 

(Seth scoffed in disbelief. “Me? Perfect? Ha!” He leaned in as if sharing a sensitive secret. “Have you even looked at yourself?”)

It was all so clear. The conversation that he’d had with Patton during lunch today only served as further proof that — 

(“Don’t be ridiculous, you’re clearly the superior one here.” Toby and Seth’s faces were very close together now. “And I’ll bet you anything that you’re the better kisser, too.”)

Ahem. Further proof that Logan’s teaching methods were —

(“Oh, is that right. That’s an awfully bold claim, you know… are you sure it’ll be able to follow through?”) 

Were — were due for some — 

(“Why don’t we put it to the test and find out —?”)

Unable to stand it any longer, Logan suddenly slammed his fork down. “Dad! Pop!” His parents pulled apart with a jolt. “Can’t you at least wait for me to leave the table? Your son is right here, you know.” 

Toby rubbed his knee, which had smacked against the bottom of the table in his surprise, while Seth gave their son a guilty smile. “Right. Sorry, Logan. I, uh, guess we forgot ourselves for a second there?”

Rolling his eyes at his fathers’ antics, Logan scraped the last bit of food off of his plate to ensure that nothing was wasted. “May I be excused? Immediately.”

“Of… of course,” responded Logan’s pop, still a little sheepish. “Don’t worry about the dishes; your dad and I are going to stay here and finish eating at our own pace, so you can just wash your own plate and we’ll take care of the rest.”

Translation: Your dad and I are going to stay here and probably make out with each other over the table as soon as there’s a wall safely separating us from you. Logan made a face — how shameless they are, he thought — but did what he was told without complaint.

Later, once he’d found a seat on one of the many beanbag chairs in his bedroom, Logan returned his focus to the topic he’d been reflecting on before his fathers’ antics had distracted him. Positive and negative reinforcement… Ah, yes. 

The conversation that he’d had with Patton during lunch today only served as further proof that Logan’s teaching methods were due for some change. After having seen firsthand how positively Patton reacted to praise, perhaps Logan ought to give a little more of it during his next session. It couldn’t hurt, right?

Wrong, Logan realized. The increased effectiveness of his teaching was going to come at a price, and a hefty one at that: in order to achieve all that he was setting out to do, he would need to come face-to-face with — ugh — 

"Feelings, the bane of my existence,” Logan grumbled.

***

[next chapter]

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