#there are so many people im stoked to hang out with

[a9saga]

im so fucking burnt out and exhausted and i still have so much work to do and i want to do absolutely none of it anymore. i wanna fast forward through this next month so my semester can just be over already but i’d skip over my birthday which is a week from tomorrow, and i am going to have to be grinding my ass off still, as well as the weekends before and after it i have so much work it’s like i don’t have time for it, i don’t have time for any of it, but all i really want right now is to just chill out and spend some time with my good friends whom i miss amongst my hours of daily math homework that still isnt enough. i really hope someone cheers me up because i can’t even hide how stressed out i am for the life of me.

[solar-sunnyside-up]

hey, something i've been struggling with recently is i've been struggling with "finding my people" because i'm a minority in my hometown, and a lot of people... aren't. they don't understand me, and often when i try to get them to understand they seem like they fall back into the old systems they were traumatized with (elitism, classism ect.,). 1/2 -solidarity anon

Im gunna say this at the top, this is so rough and im so sorry you gotta go through this sweetie. We are so isolated and filtered into categories within our current system in order to keep that isolation and to fight solidarity and unity. Now I cannot know for 100% sure what your going through or the extend your suffering. But will say I am from and currently still live in a oil loving, god fearing, anti-LGBT, and very racist city while i was raised wiccan by a poly core family and all my gay aunts/uncles and have been dreaming of an earthship my whole life plus every summer id be stuck in an even more harsh farming community that was so small they gotntheir first street light when i was 9 and the chruch is also town hall (mayor works in a wing off of the building). So there is at least some overlap in the experiences your having.

But that being said, how I got weirdly connected to people and involved in so many projects and stuff might not work for you.

Personally? I just yelled and yelled about the injustice of the system at work, about cool forestry projects and people buying ghost towns to start up Co-loving villages. Sharing discworld and different philosophers with coworkers backed up by their fave hobby. About how terrible the conservative politics are. About how cool transit could be if we funded it. About community art projects and how cool solar glass would make things look. About drags shows and events and did you know there is A SOUP FESTIVAL? I'm autistic and have only really interacted my whole childhood with friends with ADHD so my brain is weird and won't shut up once it starts going.

As a result of my ramblings, I have gotten a lot of responses mostly ones that are positive since if they didn't agree with my absurdist philosophy ramblings or solar project ideas they'd just leave the coffee shop. If they enjoyed it, say they want to join a community garden/event or if someone was as stoked as I was about again UNLIMITED TASTINGS SOUP FESTIVAL than we'd chat about that. The thing is a lot of these things have overlap. Someone who wants to convert their lawn into a pollinators habitate prob also likes little libraries and as a result prob also likes the idea of dark sky street lights. And down the rabbit hole you go.

That being said... my best actual advice is 2 pronged.

RESEARCH and REACH OUT

I personally have done years worth of research on my city. What local events and politics are happening? Even in rural places there is at least garderns, there's engineers, there's usually a LGBT focused club. And from these spaces, you can build a network. Doing research I found out about 5 different organizations in my city (most of which was founded 40 yrs ago??) That where sustainability focused. Doing research made me realize how cool community associations could be and how I could help mine out. It also gives you all those ideas for convos.

Second, I reached out to those groups about weird ideas I had, about if I could hang up posters for them in my local area, if I could buy groups worth of tickets in advance, and than also reaching out to the ppl I already talked to and had these ppl interact. My fave example of this is T. T is an engineer who built a fully functioning solar car during his degree program but specializes in hydroponics (how we ended up talking was over plants) he than gets shown my fave farm near by and now he's building the farms hydro system and Seedling house. Writing in to newsletter ppl and showing off weird layout design. This is ultimately very anxiety indusing. What if I'm bothering them? Why should I be spamming them like this? But the secret here is-

No one will ever be mad about you showing interest in their interest once you find those ppl. They want the interaction just as much as you do.

[thestudentfarmer]

Garden update today :)

We had some more gloomy wet weather so unfortunatly some chores and errands fell through and I'm a little behind on some maintenance as well as seed uppotting

Sadly I don't think any of my peppers are going to grow. A few of the tomatoes have sprouted so there is at least that. Unfortunatly i dont think they will be ready for transplanting by valentines day. They'll be a little behind anyways.

Here's the cabbages now~

I'm very excited to see these growing so well this season :D they are transplanted and these 4 are the survivers so far.

The carrots (don't mind the weeds, I'll be yanking them as soon as I catch up, as long as I get them before seed they make excellent salads for the chickens)

The nasturtium, there's some flowers tucked up inside them, a few yellows this season, not to many red or orange so far.

The broccoli and a close up of one that seems to be growing multiple little florets now :D

The lentils I put in the L bed are starting to sprout now too :) I think this upcoming season I may plant cucumbers or melons of some sort.

And a bit excited, a lil garlic peice is starting to peek through!!

Oh! I also saw 2 of the wild love parrots this morning in one of the neighbors' trees!!! I have no choice but to always have sunflowers growing and will need to accommodate some grow space for them now 😂 their pretty rarely sighted in the area im at so I am super stoked to see them.

hopefully, they are able to find enough food to hang out for more than flying through, and that people get to see why having green spaces in cities is important to more than just human benefit.

That's it for now :)

🌱🌻Happy homesteading and gardening 🌻🌱

1 26 2024

[kilibaggins]

Rough Day? | Gabriel Stokes

gabriel stokes x reader

Request From @kittennonbinary: hey, i'm wondering if you could write something cute about gabriel stokes, where his s/o had a terrible day and need cuddles, kisses, words of affirmation and being hold while sleep, please make it cute as possible, i really need cute gabe

A/N: EEEE this is my first time writing gabriel even though i literally love him so so much! hes one of my favorites and i dont see that much content for him anywhere so im happy to add to it! thank you so much for the request!!! feel free to request more if you want for gabe or other characters! i hope i did it justice!

Warnings: crying, mentions of death, fighting, stress, and i think that's it? none of the death or fighting is specifically about anyone it's just mentioned as a stresser. gabriel hums a christian song but its not really that prominent in the story.

Word Count: 979

You walk through the door, quickly taking off your coat and hanging up with a huff. You pull off your weapons and put them next to the door. Each time you put something down it makes a loud noise because of how hard you do it. When that's done you walk into the kitchen and grab a glass. You fill it up and take a big drink before putting it back down and leaning against the counter, sighing softly. Today's been… A rough day. Every day in the apocalypse is a rough day, but sometimes it just gets unbearable.

You have to take a deep breath to stop yourself from crying. Crying isn't going to fix your issues even if it'll make you feel better. The constant struggles, the death, and the fights between your own people, it's weighing on you constantly. Not many people have died lately, thankfully, but even so, it feels so suffocating knowing that it's a possibility. You can't stop it as a few tears flow down your face and you groan, annoyed. Annoyed with your feelings, with yourself, with everything.

"Rough day, huh?"

You look up to see Gabriel, who looks more relaxed than he normally does in a white T-Shirt and black pants. He walks towards you slowly, smiling gently at you. His smile always makes you relax a bit.

"Yeah," You say simply. He steps up to you and gently lays his hands on your waist. You lean forward and rest your head on his chest.

"You're okay now, Y/N," Gabriel says, bringing his arms up and around you. He gently squeezes you and you try to hold back your emotions but can't. He softly hums to you, some church hymn he knows from before the apocalypse, and it calms you down. His singing, his humming, it always calms you no matter what it is. Even if you don't believe in whatever he's singing or humming about. "Come on, you need some rest."

You let him slowly walk with you to the bedroom, his arm around your shoulder. When you get in the room he gently sits you down on a chair before searching through his own clothes to get you something to wear. You smile when he pulls out the pair that he knows you like to wear when you're having a tough time. He's so gentle with you as he takes your shirt and pulls it off and puts on the fresh one. You smile when his eyes linger slightly.

"You like what you see?" You tease, and he smiles.

"Always. You're beautiful." He says, and he helps you pull off your shoes and pants as well. "You're wonderful."

You smile and watch him as he takes your dirty clothes and puts them in the hamper. He walks back over and gently runs his fingers down your face.

"Thank you." You say, thanking him for everything. He takes your hand and pulls you up off the chair and over to the bed.

"Of course, Y/N." He gently lays you down and steps away. You reach out and grab his hand.

"Wait!" You say, and he looks back at you, "Stay."

Gabriel smiles and leans down to kiss your forehead.

"Always, my love. I'll be back shortly. I'm getting you some water and fruit." Gabriel says, and you relax. "I'll be back soon."

Gabriel keeps to his word and in no time he's back in the room, a large glass of water and a small bowl of fruit in his hands. He comes over and sits on the bed, putting the bowl of fruit between the two of you. You sit up and he hands you the water.

"Where'd you get the fruit?" You ask, and Gabriel smiles jokingly.

"A magician never tells his secrets," Gabriel says, laughing. You laugh and shake your head.

"Is it magic or awesome priest-talking skills?" You tease, taking a fruit and eating it. Gabriel shakes his head and laughs.

"No, no, a few people owed me," Gabriel says, nodding. You laugh softly and lean against him, your head on his shoulder.

"Everyone owes you." You say earnestly and he smiles and kisses your head.

"I love you." He says, grabbing a piece of fruit and eating it. You smile and hum happily.

"I love you too…" You say, closing your eyes.

A few moments later, Gabriel holds out the bowl to you and bumps your hand with it. You open your eyes and take the last pieces of fruit out and put them in your mouth. Gabriel puts the bowl to the side and gives you your water again.

"Gabe, you don't have to mother-hen me." You tease and he brings his hand up to your face and gently traces the side of it.

"You deserve this. You deserve to be taken care of. You're worthy of every good thing… And right now life is hard and you might be having a difficult time, and maybe you've even made a few mistakes that you have a hard time forgiving yourself for… But we're human. And you? You're flawless in my eyes." Gabriel says, gently pulling you close. He lays the both of you down and pulls you to his chest. "I love you. You're the most important thing in this world."

You bury your face in his chest to hide how emotional his words have made you. Sometimes you really need to hear these things and Gabriel always knows when and how to say them. He's always there for you and he's always willing to listen and comfort you.

"I love you too, Gabriel." You say, wrapping your arm around his torso. "Thank you."

"For what, Y/N?" He asks, rubbing his hand up and down your back.

"For this. For being here for me, for everything… For loving me."

"Y/N, love, You make it easy."

You fall asleep in his arms feeling safe and loved.

[dirt-grub]

my gender is male but like specifically a nasty horrid little guy

[purple-worm]

Ahhhhhh thank you for your thoughts on my post!!! I'm honestly stoked that people want to talk about these characters, since I feel like I'm a bit late to the party. I do agree with your points. Gram does come across as a bad friend, and it ends up looking like he was only close to Black to be near Eugene. I mostly feel meh about his actions because I was so uninvested in the whole dynamic. I agree that the situation could've been salvaged if Black and Gram had talked to each other more or if Black had been angrier with Gram. And I would have believed in GramEugene more if they had had more meaningful conversations.

If you ever want to yell about these characters feel free to message me!

Oh my thank you for reading it all, you’re too kind😭

You’re right about it feeling a little meh bc it looks like gram was just hanging out w black for eugene. honestly, i didnt feel as strongly as i wanted to about all the platonic friendships in the show? I still call it found family, and that’s mostly because of the ending. but a few incidents (not sympathizing with sean enough, or even wondering where black was) don’t help sell the found family dynamic as much as they could have, unfortunately :(

i think all that is mostly to do with the timing issues they had. they wanted to prioritize the pacing of the romantic relationships within the main Tawi related plot points they had chosen (which is fair), it didn’t leave time for a lot of things. But they also prioritized throwing us off w GramEugene which was eeehhh?? Again, im convinced they couldn’t put much thought into it bc of logistical reasons so who knowss :((

They were shooting as it aired which is,,, super difficult bc you dont get to see the fully edited show start to finish before putting it out in the world. and it is bound to have errors especially w the way pnuchy works bc she improvises and keeps trying to improve it as they go. Gun even mentioned that she added dialogue in post production, which he had to record separately. if you see the full picture once, we can scrutinize and improve it, but yeahh. i partially blame gmmtv, not hating them, but a show w this degree of depth required better scheduling and idek if it was in their hands to provide that, or that they expected it.

BUT! Im super glad that you are still talking about it! i joined just before ep 9 aired, and while the hype was high while it aired, it quickly died down once the it ended which surprised me. there’s lottttssss to go over, bc the themes are complex. it was basically, all my favorite things served on a platter. it changed me forever, and it’s staying this way. And im sorry if this initially came off as picking on the show😭😭 i promise im not, im willing to go on forever about what the MANY GOOD things show did.

so right back at ya @lelephantsnail ! feel free to yell at me about it, whenever!

[thiccbuckybarnesfic]

Hello! I think you've said before that you're ok with people asking about your WIPs but if that's wrong please ignore me but if not would you like to talk about any of them? 👉👈What's your favorite one you're currently working on?

😭❤️😭❤️😭❤️ omg anon yes you are more than welcome to ask me about my wips anytime sweetheart thank you for your interest!!!

i have a ridiculous amount of wips because i took on the drabble event (which i promise im working on i just hit major writers burnout and needed to take a few weeks away) but right noooooow im working on a few top secret projects. one is a gift, one is a co-write, and another is a collab with an amazing artist and friend!! and im doing two works for the Stucky Big Bang that i am stoked for but those won't be posted until i believe november❤️ since those are all secret projects i can't share much about them for now 🤫

as for my favorite independent wip im working on (slowly but surely) id have to say my lil monsterfucker heart is especially excited for my tentacle steve sequel if that's you're thing! i love them and i really love the sequel im working on that shows the after with lots of monster romancing and filthy bits. i had so many comments from lovely readers who said that they dont normally read monster fic but they liked my tentacle steve so exploring that more in the sequel is SO fun i cant wait so here's a snippet

warnings for: consentacles, tentacle monster steve/human bucky, sequel to this 🐙

Bucky takes the opportunity to seek Steve, who is still in the bathroom. He knocks on the door and steps in to find Steve back in his true form, lounging back in the bathtub that’s full to the brim, with several of his tentacles hanging over the edge. It should be an odd sight, if Bucky is honest with himself. The tentacles are inky-black but have a blue shine to them. They move and coil lazily, clearly indicating how tired Steve is. Bucky wants nothing more than to be wrapped up in them, and perhaps that is the oddest of it all; how deeply he desires Steve, how carnal his wants are but also how his heart threatens to shatter at the thought of Steve leaving him alone again. “Long morning?” Bucky asks him quietly as he comes to sit on the edge of the claw-foot tub. Steve blinks up at him from under his long lashes, a tired look on his face. His wet hand reaches out to hold Bucky’s, his thumb swiping over his knuckles and leaving a trail of water. The thin tip of a tentacle wraps around Bucky’s wrist and it makes his heart settle at the contact. “It is hard to maintain a human form for long,” he murmurs, lips ticking up into a smile. Bucky’s heart flutters in his chest from the sight of him. Steve stares at him with heavy eyes. The faucet dripping is the only noise for a long moment, and Bucky is not sure what the heavy look means. He opens his mouth to voice his concerns, to tell Steve to rest, but Steve beats him to it. “I will not pretend that I am not putting you in danger, little one. One word from your lips and I will be gone.” The words catch Bucky off balance. His eyes widen, and stomach plummets. He slides off the ledge of the bathtub and eases his knees on the floor, gripping Steve’s hand in his. The thought of sending Steve away makes his chest ache fiercely. “Please, no. I waited so long for you, I don't want you to leave me so soon. Please stay with me for as long as you desire me,” Bucky begs, pulling Steve’s hand in to kiss his fingers. Steve watches him with those mysterious blue eyes; eyes that have seen decades of life that Bucky likely can’t imagine. Steve’s hand reaches forward to cup the side of his face, and Bucky leans into it, feeling like he is on the precipice of having his heart broken again. “That is the problem, little one. I desire you so much and so deeply, I fear I will never want to let you go,” Steve whispers, gaze not leaving his own. It's intense and heady, almost impossible to look away but Bucky turns his head to kiss Steve’s palm, lips feeling how warm he is. “Then don’t. Don’t let me go again.”

[dammarchy211]

1. do u mind if ppl make ur art their icons? Just curious!!

2. I love your cryptid kidz take!! Im curious if youre planning on including any other fandoms, and the age differences between the kids (I HOPE THIS DOESNT COME OFF IN A WEIRD WAY i was wondering bc dibs so tall in comparison to the other kids)?? Im so curious about ur thoughts on their individual dynamics with one another!! Or what the gals think of each other :3!! or if tak will show up..

SORRY FOR THE BIG BLOCK OD QUESTIONS I LOVE STUFF LIKE THIS IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY... Ur art style is really cool so it really caught my attention!!

(I had a big paragraph written and tumblr crashed while I was writing it :,,-) )

It’s ok I love questions!!!

1. No I don’t mind! Just credit me in ur bio or smth

2. I probably won’t be including any other fandoms as to not clutter it, as well as the fact I was kind going off a formula of nerd kid + his sister. No particular reason, just for a pattern ig?

The age differences between the kids r Raz- 10, Jude- like 12 (I say like as he doesn’t actually have a canon age lol), Dib- 12 like in the iz movie, and Dipper- 13. I made Dib taller to add variety to their designs when put next to each other and also because all of the kids in iz are basically the same height I thought I’d say fuck it and have some fun with it lol

(For simplicity, Ford will refer to Ford pines, and Cruller will refer to Ford Cruller lol)

As for dynamics, Jude and Dib would get along Rlly well, just kinda as an instant click type thing since they have so many similarities. They’re all definitely friends but I feel like Dipper and Jude would but heads the most. Dipper tends to be really cautious, and while Jude does exercise caution, it’s usually for more ‘nonsensical’ reasons. Jude has a more reckless idea of problem solving (ie wanting to just shoot the cultists and burn down their hideout in act 1) and that wouldn’t really sit well with Dipper lmao. Dipper also would try to like, assert himself as letter with all of his planning shit but it probably wouldn’t work that well. Jude and Dib are also the most unhinged out of the 4 so Dipper and Raz are like 🤨 a lot. Raz would get along with all of them very well, however there’d definitely be at least a little bit of “you’re like 10 how come you get to be able to do all of this cool stuff???” And the other 3 would ask him a bunch of questions constantly because “omg you’re really psychic???? Lemme take notes.” Dammek would try to lead them around or “supervise” them as like the “cool older teen friend” but he has even less common sense then the 4 of them and the worst advice— Dammek high school bullies Zim. Gaz, Frazie, and Joey would kinda just be like “ew it’s my nerd brother and his nerd friends.” But still hang out with them, Mabel on the other hand just regular hangs out with them bc she doesn’t want Dipper to go on adventures without her! The girls would get along pretty good as well, however I feel like Joey would be Kinda cold to Mabel bc she has a tendency to be a little mean to people when they’re more social or optimistic than her, but she would get over it eventually and they can talk about animals or sparkly stickers or something jfhdjdjd. Xefros is a little upset that Raz is psychic because telekinesis used to be his thing and now there’s a kid that’s like 4/5 years younger than him and better at it 😔 the 4 boys would probably follow Roxy, Ford, Sasha, and Cruller around a lot because they wanna! Do science stuff n go on adventures and missions! Stan would also try to have fun with the kids but in a Stan sorta way. Sasha would so get into an Argument w/ Prof. Membrane they would hate eachother— Any of the alien enjoyers would be SO STOKED about Dammek, Xefros, and Zim (even tho zim keeps insisting that he is, In fact, not an alien). Tbh Dammek n Xef probably already know what Irkens are and Zim probably already knows what trolls are (and would probably freak out if he found out the condensce/Betty Crocker was on earth lol) Raz and Zim also get “huh u guys sound similar” a lot (I wonder why D-: /s).

OK THATS ENOUGH RAMBLING!! I just have so many thoughts for this flghdkgfisheudd

[robert-de-niro-only-fans]

HI ILY UHH HERES MY DESCRIPTION FOR THE SHIP THING ILY!! So I’m 5’4 (how Pesci type beat) I have blue eyes, long blondeish hair, and im kinda chubby (my chest causes so much back pain LMAO JEJDJDJ) I am an 🔆artist🔅 i just like to create in general, and i love to give art to people. Also extremely touch starved ( as you know JSJSJSJKD) my personality is all over the place, but I mosey people say I’m eccentric :)) also my clothing style is WACK anyways THANK YOU SO MUCH ILY SO MUCH ASH❤️❤️❤️❤️❤

Don Lino

Jk April Fools 😭😭

Okay okay but 🙇 hear! me! out!

💖 Captain Shakespeare 💖

I know you came here for a boyfriend, but I'm instead giving you a bestie for life! You would totally be hanging out in the captain's quarters dancing and playing dress up with this old man, and all of the pirates on his ship would ask you to draw things from the regular world. Like picture them all being fuckin STOKED over a drawing of a cat 🐈

Like you already have so many men (Tommy, Sonny, Jimmy, etc.) so I think my bestie needs a bestie who will treat her right, and Captain Shakespeare would treat you like a queen, and he would help you develop your fashion sense however you would like to! He would have a little trunk that he keeps all of your little art projects in ❤️ as if it were his treasure!

[marauder-exe]

Couch- Sirius Black x Reader

Request: Hi sweets! I was wondering I could make a request for Sirius with the prompts 2, 9, 59, 71? Sorry if it's too many! Also, if the reader could be in Ravenclaw please? Thanks anyway 💓

Prompts: 2.“I love him/her, and I know that I shouldn���t.”

9.“You’re safe here, I got you.”

59.“You are very endearing when you are half-asleep.”

71.“Are you really flirting with me right now?”

Word Count: 1.3k

A/N: i know sirius’ speech is very long and dramatic, but so is sirius so it fits :)

You and Sirius both realised you loved each other around a similar time, there was that defining moment, between you two, that really set it all into perspective, about how much you cared for each other. You two where sat in the Ravenclaw common room, Sirius having snook into the common room earlier that evening. You had threatened to hex any of your classmates, who found out you where sneaking Sirius in, if they where to tell on you two. You two where just lay on the couch, midnight quickly approaching, the common room was desolate and quiet. You where asleep sound, looking perfect to Sirius, but he had no idea of the fears that where plaguing your dreams. You twitched. Sirius tried stroking your hair, knowing that always calmed you down, but right now, you weren't convinced anything could calm you down.

You rounded the corner of Grimmuald Place, looking for Sirius. He had always said you two would fight this battle together. You spent 6 years side by side, and you where going out together. A flash of light came from the hallway, followed by a strained scream. You immediately ran to the source of the chaos. What you saw was something you never wanted to see. Sirius. Dead. It wasn't possible. It-it couldn't be. He was right there just a minute ago. Why? Why was this happening? Why was this happening to you guys of all people? You just screamed. Screamed louder than you ever had in your life. Screamed so loud, your throat burned and your lungs ached. You grabbed Sirius collar and cried.

“(Y/N)”

“SIRIUS!”

“(Y/N)! Wake up!”. Your eyes shot open and you bolted upright, almost knocking Sirius in the face. Tears had flooded your face during your nightmare. You didn't realise yo had been screaming during your sleep. Your breaths where shallow and your eyes are wide. You turned toward Sirius. Sirius. He was still alive. He was still here. He was still your Siri. You clung onto him, sobbing into his white shirt, leaving mascara stains.

“You’re safe here, I got you.” He whispered as he stoked your hair. “Its Sirius, im still here, your not getting rid of me that easy, just take deep breaths” He smiled, breathing in and out deeply, asking you to follow him. It took around 20 minutes for you to calm down and your heart rate to return to normal. During that time, Sirius had sprinted down to the kitchens, even though it was close to midnight, to get you two some hot chocolate. You where worried he was gonna get caught, but he didn't mind. Hell, that boy would go to the ends of the earth for you, even the ends of the galaxy. He had returned a few minutes later and you two got cuddled up on the couch, one arm around your waist and the other under your head. You where facing him, half asleep, a peaceful look on your face.

“Darling, ya know you are very endearing when you are half-asleep.” He gave a lopsided smile and tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“Are you really flirting with me right now?” You giggled. “ive, not even half an hour ago, had a nightmare about you kicking the bucket, and now your flirting with me?” You broke out into fierce laughter.

“What? I took the opportunity” He also broke into laughter. The laughing died down after a few minutes, and you stared into Sirius eyes until you drifted off to sleep.

Around an hour later, Sirius still hadn't fallen asleep. He wanted to be awake in case you had another nightmare. Well that's what he told himself anyway. He also really needed to use the bathroom, but he had absolutely no clue where it was. He slowly got up from the couch, trying not to disturb you, and wandered up the stairs to see if he could locate a bathroom anywhere. What he didn't expect to see however was a boy, stood leaning against the top of the stairs, right by the bathroom. Sirius had seen him before, he hung around with you a lot. But what was he doing, stood near the stairs at 1 in the morning.

“Blake.” He greeted.

“Its Black.” Sirius corrected. Wow this was tense.

“Whatever anyway, Bloom” Sirius grumbled at the repeated misuse of his name. “Why are you hanging around with (Y/N) so much?” Was this man stupid, Sirius thought.

“What do you mean? We've been friends for the last 6 years? Any of that ring a bell?” Sirius was absolutely baffled, what was he trying to insinuate?

“Right. Are you sure your not just using her? She's not another one of your little toys is she?” The Cheek on this man.

“Im not like that any more.” Sirius stated holding his ground.

“right, so all the flirting? You mean that?” He challenged.

“Of course I do, you babbling idiot.” Sirius was getting heated, how dare this bozo insinuate that he was just using you, the woman he loved.

“Well you shouldn't, she's not the one for you. She is the Ravenclaw princess, she's never done anything wrong a day in her life. Straight A’s, tutoring students, prefect, on her way to head girl. And you. Renowned Gryffindor Playboy. Never had a day without a detention, go through girls like their pieces of paper. Its a pity she fell for you in the first place. As his speech halted, Sirius’ heart sped up, she felt the same? That couldn't be true, no way. Everything her friend said was true, why would the Ravenclaw princess want to be with him?

“ Look, I love her, and I know that I shouldn’t.” He huffed as her friends face. “She's the Ravenclaw princess and im just Sirius, I get it.”

“Sirius” Her friend chimed in a warning tone but he didn't listen.

“i get it. But I cant stop im addicted to that girl, she's like a drug and I really cant get enough.” Her friend let out another whisper of ‘Sirius!’ but again he didn't listen. He just kept rambling. “ Ever since the day I met her I was enchanted, but I couldn't have her, so I used people. And that made me a horrible person. And I realised I needed to stop, so I did. Listen, I love every single little thing about her. And im not someone who says that lightly. I love when she twitches in her sleep, when she takes endless amounts of photos, and has worn odd socks every single day since I met her. That woman has a hold on my heart that I could not break even if I wanted to. And there have been times ive wanted it. Its been crazy, its been painful, but I don't think I could stop loving her any more than I could stop breathing. I am hopelessly, irrevocably, in love with her. More than she knows”

“That was cute and all but are you gonna listen to me know?” He questioned and raised an eyebrow, looking behind Sirius. He spun round, and there he saw you. More tears rolling down your cheeks than he had ever seen in his life. Even more than the first time you saw your puppy. He swallowed hard.

“Did you hear all that?” My god he prayed you didn't. You just nodded. He just rushed to you and started babbling.

“Do you want me to pretend like this never happened?” He questioned, although he wasn't sure he wanted to hear.

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 65 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 98 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

--

RATE THE EPISODE 94 Responses

Although a bit muted compared to last week, the response to this episode was still overwhelmingly positive, with 96.8% of people giving it a rating of 3 and higher. MAPPA’s on a roll!

Amazing!!!!

i just wanna see more!! 20 minutes is not enough. its too good

Awesome episode! Great pacing and the cgi was not too noticeable.

WAAAAYYYYY TOO HYPE

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 93 Responses

Mikasa and Levi took the spotlight this week! 30.1% of viewers felt most hyped up by Mikasa’s “explosive” reintroduction to the anime, while 22.6% were stoked to see Levi take on Porco to save Eren. 18.3% were most hyped by the Survey Corps taking on the Jaw Titan and the subsequent cliffhanger.

THE CGI CONTINUES TO BE A POINT OF CONTENTION. BE HONEST, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE EXECUTION OF CGI SO FAR THIS SEASON? 93 Responses

Just under 50% of responses seemed to indicate that they thought MAPPA was doing very well with the CGI utilized. A little over 15% stated that although it was not their favorite, they understood that it could be a lot worse. Other responses (in order) were being neutral about the CGI, not liking it, but understanding the need for its usage and folks who adamantly rejected 3D animation. 

I actually prefer CGI titans because of the way their movements looks, it looks almost slower, to me it fits very well with how the big titans are. Im not an anime guy at all so ive never seen cgi in other anime but i really like the way Mappa's CGI looks, it blends in very well. I dont like CGI people though, the shot with Jean throwing the marly soldier off the rooftop i didn't like very much.

I feel horrible saying this believe me... but I really vibed with the CGI up until this episode. I think maybe because it's the first time its been used on humans (OPM) rather then titans. I'm not massively put off though, I really apreciate the efforts this episode must have taken. TY Mappa

The episode is great no doubt, my only concern is the CG personally, as a 3D artist myself, I think I would prefer an all 2D medium like the battle at Stohess. Using 3D is fine as long as it blends seamlessly to the background, like kengan ashura, it's not perfect but bearable.

I honestly think that 2D will always 100% be better than cgi but I can understand why mappa is using cgi

It was fine in the other episodes, but in this episode, it looked overused and bit bad

HOW WAS EREN’S ROOFTOP SWAN DIVE? 94 Responses

When it came down to Eren’s swan rooftop dive (“Like a fallennn angel…”), the majority seemed to be impressed, with 68% giving it a score of 4 or higher. It was not a monolithic opinion however and many seemed also rated it poorly. Do better, Eren!

WHICH RETURNING CHARACTER’S ENTRANCE WAS YOUR FAVORITE IN THIS EPISODE? 94 Responses

The Survey Corps has returned! Of these reappearances, viewers most enjoyed Mikasa’s (48.9%), Levi’s (31.9%) and Sasha’s (14.9%) the most. Jean and Connie got a little less love, though we’re sure people were still happy to see them!

WHICH RETURNING CHARACTERS HAS THE BEST GLOW UP? 93 Responses

It would appear that the slight plurality sees Mikasa as having the best glow up out of the cast, followed by (in order) Eren, Sasha, Connie, Jean, Floch and Levi. The Old Captain doesn’t like to change up his style, we suppose. 

Eren didn't have a glow up- he had a glow down.

Mikasa can stomp on me please god

OF ALL THE ORIGINAL CAST, WE STILL HAVE NOT SEEM ARMIN, HANGE OR HISTORIA YET. WHICH OF THE THREE ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING NEXT? 93 Responses

In relation to the previous question, we still haven’t seen 3 major members of the cast. Armin, Hange and Historia. When we asked which of the three you were most looking forward to seeing next, the slight majority (52.7%) expressed their excitement for seeing Armin again, followed by 11.8% wanting to see Hange most. Some others have also expressed their desire to see Historia again. 17.2% simply could not choose and 10.8% stated that they simply didn’t care about the 3 characters.

WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE WARHAMMER TITAN? 90 Responses

The Warhammer received an overwhelmingly positive response, with the majority expressing much excitement over both its design and powers. 15.6% noted that the design was a bit too creepy for their liking, but the powers were awesome. And on the flip side, 10% noted the Titan’s design was rather cool, in contrast to its rather OP ability. A select few did not enjoy either aspect. 

Would probably enjoy it more if it belonged to someone that likely is not going to be just cannon fodder

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE NEW UNIFORMS? 92 Responses

The Survey Corps returned sporting new uniforms to much fanfare. 30.4% of respondents really enjoy the upgrade, finding the suits to be badass. 23.9% couldn’t find the words and just settled for pure hype. 20.7% enjoy the new uniforms just as much as they enjoy the classic uniforms. 12% felt it was a much needed upgrade, though 10.9% don’t care at all about the uniform change.

I like both but I prefer the old design

EREN SAYS TO MIKASA, “YOU GUYS ACTUALLY CAME.” THIS IS FOLLOWED UP BY MIKASA ASKING EREN TO COME HOME. DOES THIS INSINUATE THAT EREN WENT TO THE MAINLAND ON HIS OWN? 90 Responses

The circumstances of the Survey Corps’ presence on the mainland continues to be a mystery. When we asked about whether Eren was there alone or not a few episodes ago, the majority believed that he was either there alongside the Survey Corps or was sent there by them. Overall, the feelings seem to be the same (that Eren came alongside the Survey Corps). 45.6% think that Mikasa’s words may have some other meaning and that things are way too planned out to be coincidence. 18.9% believe that Eren did go rogue, while 15.6% think that Eren didn’t necessarily go rogue, but wasn’t working with them for a while either. The remaining 20% have already been spoiled on this particular plot point.

THE ATTACK ON LIBERIO SEEMS TO PARALLEL THE BREACH OF SHIGANSHINA. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS EVENT IN COMPARISON? 92 Responses

Now that both sides of the conflict have had their rude awakening, we asked how you guys felt about the two events comparatively. 33.7% feel that both attacks were tragic, but still feel more empathy toward the Eldians on Paradis than they do toward those who were raised on Marley. At a tie, 22.8% of respondents felt that the victims of the Liberio attack got what was coming with them, while another 22.8% felt about the same amount of sympathy for the victims on both sides. 10.9% feel this is way worse than what happened in Shiganshina and feel more sympathy for the victims in Liberio. 

I am yet to know the goals behind this attack.

Marley did this countless times so I don’t feel bad for them. I kind of feel for eldians tho bc they are brainwashed from a young age to give up their lives for a country who doesn’t give a shit about them. 

Honestly they deserve what Eren is doing to them. Excluding Falco, no one outside of Paradis has earned my sympathy, even with the additional context.

SADLY, UDO AND ZOFIA DID NOT SURVIVE THE ATTACK ON LIBERIO. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THEIR DEATHS? 91 Responses

Udo and Zofia have joined the ranks of characters who tagged along with the main cast for a while only to be killed off for character development. 25.3% anticipated at least one of them to die, but not both. Another tie on this poll, 24.2% stated that they were disappointed and was hoping to see more of them, while another 24.2% didn’t care about them at all. 14.3% are happy to ditch the focus on them in favor of more familiar characters, and 8.8% feel pure and utter devastation. 

Good riddance Warrior scum

Sad but allows for Gabi’s development 

sad but okay. death is common in this anime.

EREN AND FLOCH’S LAST INTERACTION IN S3 WAS A VERY TENSE ARGUMENT. NOW IT SEEMS FLOCH IS DEDICATED TO EREN’S CALL TO ACTION, SHIFTING THE “NECESSARY DEVIL” STATUS FROM ERWIN ONTO HIM. WHAT DO YOU THINK THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS LIKE NOW? 91 Responses

Eren and Floch were anything but BFF’s at the closing of season 3. Now Floch seems to be wholly devoted to Eren’s cause… What changed? 28.6% believe that nothing has actually changed in terms of their relationship, but that Floch simply just latched onto Eren’s fight in need of a new devil. 23.1% feel that they still aren’t friends, but are in more comfortable “ally” territory. 15.4% aren’t sure what to make of it. Smaller handfuls feel that they either grew to become friends and/or co-conspired to attack Liberio together. 22% are already spoiled on the details. 

Floch is easily persuaded...and annoying 🤷‍♀️

WE SEE GABI GRAB THE GUARD’S FUN AFTER WITNESSING SASHA KILL HIM. WHAT DO YOU THINK MIGHT HAPPEN? 90 Responses

Gabi moves headstrong into the fight, wanting to play her part in defending her hometown. A large chunk of anime only viewers have been spoiled on future developments for her character. But for those still in the dark - 24.4% feel that she will successfully kill a member of the Survey Corps. 21.1% aren’t sure what to expect, while 10% think she will only manage to injure someone in the Survey Corps. Smaller amounts feel she won’t be successful in any capacity or may even die herself.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Epic episode, survey corps come back, OH YEAH, but I wished they didn’t use CGI on humans and bettered the CGI on Titans.

It really makes me sad how Eren is continuing the cycle of revenge by killing innocent Marleyan civilians, but it makes sense for his character. 

Real cool ep but w h e r e a r m i n

It sucks that I like the warriors and the Corp bc both of them are victims in different way so seeing them have to go head to head sucks. They all deserve better

SO great I loved it! However, I missed Reiner, Falco, and Zeke. I hope they're okay :-) RIP Udo and Zofia :-(

I think I need more dialogue between the old crew to really settle back in with them. I kinda believe that Mappa's still trying to 'click', they obviously can't just get it right immediately. Other then that I loved the titan scenes, more than ODM scenes 😔

This was a great episode and I was literally vibrating in my seat from excitement! I think MAPPA is doing a great job with the animation and the music works really well with the action. Can’t wait for the rest of the season!

I miss wit studio

Willy seems to have his first daughter really early, he looks like 30 !

I’d say the episode as a whole is a solid 8-9/10, the cgi in some parts really ruins the moment for me

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 88 Responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated!

[lunchador]

so when do we get the long post about your feelings about dragon age inquisition!!! i dunno if u wanna wait until dlc or not! i am i n t e r e s t e d (also its ok if u dont feel up to it im just!!!! again, interested in ur opinions/feelings)

kajsldkjf PLEASE I HAVE SO MANY DA FEELINGS ALL THE TIME and Inquisition was twice as long as the others so might as well do a word vomit now and I can always do another after the dlc (which several people have assured me are worth playing )

SO

Yeah so inquisition is long. I dislike open world games so a lot of the (super repetitive!!) side quests did grate on my nerves and that docks this game a few points but over all the LORE IS SO GOOD, and it tying in so many choices in from 1+2 is the greatest butterfly effect I ever experienced in video games. I thought telltale + Until dawn were fun for that but good LORD bioware has showed up all of those games and I am really stoked to try mass effect when its out later and play more bw games. I only played Anthem before this and that game seemed...idk, gutted against BW’s wishes.

ANYWAY

Yeah, I managed to go into the whole DA series knowing very, very little, despite how many artists I followed did fanart for it. Once I started playing, I added all the words I could think of to my blacklist but a lot of untagged stuff came through (fair, series is 10+ years old and inq is like what 4-5?). I allowed my friends to pressure me into playing an elf mage for the lore and to romance solas cuz they said he was as important to the story as alistair was. A lot of online followers said I should play how I wanted, which I def would recommend to anyone else, but honestly I can see where they came from and while he never would have been my first choice, I think he actually paired REALLY well with my Inq and how I was playing her. I put her as sensitive but trying to put her responsibility above herself, she was definitely the least funny of my 3 characters, but not incredibly serious. A bit reserved? Just more mature. She’s got faith but she didn’t think she was the chosen one but she’ll do her role the best of her ability. She makes hard decisions and then sobs her chest empty over them because how is one to ever feel like its the right one? I really like how the game lets you choose how you wanna approach the responsibility. Like i said, I wasn’t a reluctant chosen one, but she will do what she can. Versus my friend playing at the same time as me said he played as the second coming of jesus essentially lmfao Having so many characters come back for different roles was so GOOD!!! Like everyone told me Varric was in this one but were like ‘teehee you still cant romance him though’ but you how you play drastically changes your relationships with each person. Tons of characters I met I knew would be personal favorites but I ended up interacting way less because others were more fitting to my inquisitor. So i.e while I love Varric and would’ve smooched him a heartbeat with Hawke, I didn’t get that vibe with Clover. They were really good friends, he was a grounded friend with a sense of humor that was a good escape from everyone else and the ~inquisition~. At least, until the Beyond the Abyss quest. That obviously heavily fractured their friendship and hurt them both :( And i felt that for a long time, until the end. He looked tired. Poor guy is gonna be borderline dead in 4 at this point. But so many side characters you talk to coming back like Dagna and Samson??? Speaking of that quest, I got Stroud because, yeah...Alistair was dead for me and APPARENTLY IT COULD ALSO BE LOGHAIN??? If he stays a grey warden??  wish I did that so def would’ve preferred to save Hawke even if I think the wardens are more important as a concept but like.......i wanted to behead him, so....But yes even tiny details like..Varric wrote home to kirkwall to Carver for me because the rest of my family was dead and I never completed a full romance in 2 lkajslkdjf but the fact that changes based on your play through. BUT YEAH THE way this game weaves all your decisions in and how yeah, overall the story is the same but it makes it so personal to YOU and so different from everyone else ;w;

But I could see my Inq genuinely falling for Solas, and I see her best friends as Cassandra and Blackwall/Thom. Really close to Leliana and the Iron Bull as well. I just loved all their interactions. All the characters were so cool to get to know?? Like I thought I would’ve hated Cullen (hes a dick in O) and tbh I just got into the series as the VA was being a complete shit. But I liked him a lot!! I love the work buddies vibes between the Inq and the advisors. I thought I was going to love Sera!! And like, I did, but she hated my Inquisitor and their personalities clashed a lot. Shes the only one i didn’t get a cut scene for in the end :’) I loved coming back from story quests and having to take like 20 minutes to go around skyhold and make sure I talked to /everyone/ for their new dialogue. You genuinely feel connected to all these wonderful npcs ljkasljdf

I wanted to make Cassandra the new divine but I made leliana on accident and kinda dug it so I stuck with it. VARRIC IS THE NEW VISCOUNT??? h i l a r i o u s.

One of the things I loved the most in this game in particular, and while this is something in all of them it just really struck me in this one, was....everyone gave up so so much to devote themselves to the cause, y’know?? Like, it’s almost heartbreaking how much everyone loses and they’re still looking towards you with their belief and willingness to follow you to the end ;-;

The final fight almost felt, Idk, underwhelming? Dude dragons are way tougher than him asdkjhfkhjd. I even went up a difficulty in this game after feeling like I got the hang of the series. But at the same time, we just spend how many hours knocking down each and one of his advantages so fuck him lol.

But yeah there are so many things I wanted to do but I felt so worn out by mindless sidequests and story being level locked in comparison to the previous games. askdjhflkd

One of the things that blows my mind is so so many people were stoked i was playing DA and they couldn’t wait til I got to Inq, and so I find out most people I know only ever played Inquisition? TBH if I didn’t play O+2 I think I would’ve dropped inquisition and never finished it *shrug* all of the build up just means SO MUCH!!! Everyones argument seems to be the older games are ugly and yeah O has rough battle system but its easy to get over imo. Like, you need the chaos of 2 to get the real weight of the mage/templar stuff?? Theres so many characters and story and dialogue that go over your head without Origins?? Like yes inq can stand alone pretty well but, idk, I’m in love with this entire series and the world building and THE!! WAY!!! IT!!! ALL!!! CONNECTS!!!!!!!!!!!

I love how a quest can go differently by whos in your party, I love you can have more dialogue based on lore you’ve managed to pick up around, I love HOW COMPANIONS BICKERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! The lore of these games are so good. It’s like playing an epic line of novels. It’s so immersive and I don’t think I’ve played too many games to this level.

I didn’t like the skill trees to being a mage in this one, Idk why. It wasn’t nearly as fun for me as 2, but then  again I really fucking liked being a force mage haha. I wanted to be a rogue to complete a diff class per game but everyone said mage brings a lot more interesting story/lore stuff so

but yeah I love having the full context now and seeing other peoples Wardens/Hawkes/Inquisitors and asking people how they played and how their options differed from mine and THERES JUST SO MANY POSSIBLE DECISION TREES!!!!! No wonder the fans play over and over.

but yeah ultimately so much fucking happened?? I’m probably missing a lot of key points.

[lesless]

It has been a while since I did a good ol fashioned ramble hmmmm? hello internet. Things are pretty chill on my end, I have a lot of fun with the roomie & BF & working remotely is honestly nice. There’s a little here n there left to do on settling into the house, like hanging pictures & rearranging the shed. My roomie has a lot to unpack but isn’t in a particular hurry. He’s been inspired by the organizing I think & has tackled his mail & other things. It���s hard work so I’m proud! Babe has been whipping up some spectacular food. He’s kept busy with his own projects which are always fruitful. We ate pineapple today & soaked some tequila & vodka in the leftovers for infused drinks we will enjoy in ~10 days. We have had a lot of fun together, laughing up a storm at stupid shit.

I’ve video chatted or texted with so many friends I adore. Jenny, Ryoko, Krystal, Barb, Roxie, Rich, Julian, Gma, uncle Kent, man’s mom, etc. it’s good to stay connected. Everyone is well if not a bit bored. Everyone has their own little rituals to stay sane. I started doing my hair & wearing jeans during the week to feel a bit more normal. I’ve done a lot of drawing & writing, aside from organizing the casa.

There’s a lot going on in the bg right now. Some trauma surfaced & paperwork filed on my dads side of the family. I hope the fucker burns. The man in question always made me uncomfortable & called me a slut the first time I wore a dress, to prom. He is an unquestionable monster. On my moms side of things, family suing family. People who should see justice are being called out. I can’t get in touch with my mom aside from a text back, but that’s pretty normal. My dad made me the coffee table, & that’s more connection than we’ve had for most of my life so far. So I’m grateful. I’ve lived a very independent existence from my parents, but I’m trying & I think they are, too. They’re trying as best they can, I think.

My bfs parents are stuck in Asia somewhere, but seem to be making the most of it. Our DnD group might be down a few, as one member feels uncomfortable speaking their 3rd(?) language to play, & the other wants more strict adherence to rules. It’s whatever. My cousins character died during the last round which was a bummer. It happens.

All around, things are as well as I could hope for & im grateful. I’m getting better at multitasking, having to work around people. I think it’s a really good thing. Lana is happy that we are home all the time & is snoring away. The roomie loves her & it makes me smile. Babe made us popcorn which is dog drugs & she was stoked. Terry the lizard is indifferent & about to shed. Had a bit of a fever today but it has passed & we had some wine & binged Ozark. I reorganized new markers from Julian & smooched my man. Overall, content.

[likeadrug-fanfic]

T H R E E : T W O

K A I D E N 

I had just found a parking space when my brother shot me a text. Looking over I replied in my head and proceeded to park before getting out and making my way inside the airport. I was more than geeked about having my baby brother here with me. He was just like me, hotheaded, horrible attitude and a nasty mouth with no filter. 

I looked around for a good minute but then I saw that damn beard. My phone went off again and I could see him getting frustrated. “Yo Karter!” His head snapped back so fast I thought the shit was gon’ break off. “MY NIGGA!” We exclaimed together as we dapped and pulled each other in for a hug. 

I stepped back and crossed my arms observing him. “Bruh you done grew the fuck up on me.” He stroked his beard cheesing. “Shit it has been a while since we’ve seen each other,” I felt bad about that shit. “but fuck it. Im just stoked to be here man. I missed you.” He dapped me again laughing. I grabbed one of his suitcases and led the way out. 

Packing his shit in the trunk, we got in and you know I had to roll a fat wood. “Still in that shit huh?” I sighed and shook my head. “Not for long.” That was one thing he hated the most. Best believe he’s a pothead but dealing? You can kiss that goodbye. Soon as I mentioned something about it he turned and walked away from me. 

He would try and be funny sometimes paying me when he wanted weed but of course I slipped the shit back to him. Thats my bro so he always get free shit. “Londyn finally gave me chance.” I spoke out hoping to shift the topic and mood. “No shit! You bagged the baddest in the city. I follow her on instagram nshit and boooooy! She still fine.” 

My face flattened as I sealed the wood and mugged his ass. “Shut the fuck up nigga.” He held his hands up in surrender and leaned his seat back. I backed out of the parking space and lit the wood. “But it happened on some wild shit. Some drunk shit actually,” he chuckled, “took her on a nice little date nshit.” I puffed on the blunt before passing.

“Its shocking but not really ‘cause it was bound to happen. Everybody knew yall was gon’ end up together sooner than later.” He shrugged taking a hit. He did have a point though. When I say everybody and their mama knew, I meant that. “Oh shit before I forget, we going out tonight for her sisters shop opening. So I hope you’on got plans.” Karter scrunched his face. “Nigga what plans would I have?” I busted out laughing and snatched my blunt from him. 

L O L A N I 

I groaned and pushed my head into the pillow as loud music blared through the house. “Get the fuck up! Get ready!” I popped up and seen Loryn standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips. “You over slept Lani.” She walked over to my closet and placed my makeup box on the vanity. “Oh shit. I wanted to flat iron my hair.”

I sat at the edge of the bed. I still had to find something to wear. “You look beautiful with curly hair. Chop chop! Lets move.” She walked out closing the door behind her. I really didnt mean to over sleep but shit I was tired. After my bubble bath I smoked a blunt and watched movies on Netflix until I fell asleep.

I was still distraught about earlier today. I felt so stupid for wanting to text Omari. I wanted answers but then again I didnt. Shaking it off, I went to the closet and picked through my clothes. I could either go classy or simple but still fashionable. I decided on simple.

Once I got dressed I brushed my teeth then started on this lion mane of mine. All I had to was wet it a little and apply moisturizer. I needed my curls to pop tonight. Checking myself out in the mirror I blew a kiss then turned out the light before returning to the closet. “Have you heard from mama?” Loryn busted in my room once again. “No. Call her.” I said in duh tone. “You call her.”

She rolled her eyes and sat on my bed. “You look cute by the way.” I waved her off and continued to dial my mom. When she answered she said, “yes Lani? Make it quick.” I placed her on speaker phone and handed the phone to Loryn. “Ma? You cant miss this night. I need you there!” She expressed. “MA! You hear you?”

“I hear you baby. Oh shit, Im on the way home now.” You could her rushing off to somewhere and slamming a door closed. “Im grabbing my things now and leaving. I wont miss it. I promise.” She said her goodbyes and explained to someone what was going on. Lordyn didnt hang up until she heard the car start up. “Shes gonna miss it.” She whispered looking like she wanted to cry.

“Stay positive. Let go get a drink.” I grabbed her hand and dragged her to the kitchen yelling out for my other two sister. “C’mon girls!” Londyn and Leilani walked into the kitchen looking fly as fuck. I swear my mama made some fine ass twins. I took the bottle of Hennessy out the freezer and grabbed some shit glasses.

I poured shots for us and motioned for them to pick one. “I just wanna toast to my bad ass sissy Loryn. I couldn’t be more proud of you!” We clinked our glasses together chanting, “congrats suh!” before throwing the shot back. I heard the door open and my mom walked in. “Oh fuck im late.” My sisters and I fell out laughing. She threw her purse and bag on the couch shrugging her jacket off. “Ima throw something on then join in.”

I got another glass and poured us another shot. We waited for my mom to come out, and five minutes later she came out looking flawless as always. “Ok Ok,” my mom grabbed her glass and looked over at Loryn. “to my precious Ruby, Im more than proud to be your mother. Im more than proud about you opening up your own business. I pray for positive vibes and many more blessings to come your way.”

She raised her glass and we followed. “Mommy loves you baby.” We clung glasses again and down the liquor. “Kaiden is here. Lets roll.” Londyn announced and I instantly got nervous. We grabbed everything we needed before leaving out and locking the house. “Hey mama Loraine.” Kaiden, who had flowers in his hands, walked up to her giving her hug and kissing her cheek. “And congrats to the Ms. Loryn.” He handed her the flowers and kissed her forehead.

“Wassup Lei, Lil Lo?” Kaiden proceeded to kiss our foreheads leaving Londyn for last. He wrapped her in a bear hug placing a fat kiss on her lips. “This my lil brotha Karter, Kater this is Mama Loraine and the the twins.” He did a quick introduction. I was definitely checking out Karter. His beard. Those lips. Thats damn smile! Calm down Lani.. I coached myself.

“Yall look beautiful,” he complimented once he took his attention off of Londyn. “whats the riding plans?” He continued. “I’ll drive. And mama and the twins can ride with me.” Loryn spoke up. Kaiden looked back at me. “Wanna ride wit us Lil Lo?” I looked around before nodding my head. Londyn squinted her eyes and walked to the car.

“Follow me Kaiden.” “Already.” We parted ways and hopped in the car. “What you call yourself doing Kai?” He cocked his head to the side and cranked the car. “Fuck you talkin bout princess?” We had to wait for Loryn to back out of the driveway before we could move. As always, Kaiden pulled out a wood that was already rolled. “Ima wait til mama and them pass to light it.” He looked at me and Karter in the backseat.

“You know exactly what Im talking about. Dont play stupid.” She looked back at us and squinted her eyes again. “Girl mind ya business.” Kaiden turned her around and took off behind Loryn.

Not even thirty minutes later, we pulled to Loryns shop, Naturals. She had her own lot and plenty of space for clients. There was close to a hundred people waiting outside. I was shocked. Kaiden cut the engine and we got out at the same time. As we got closer to the door Loryn got teary eyed. “Wow! First and foremost, thank you all for coming out and celebrating with me. Im beyond grateful.” Everyone cheered clapping their hands.

“I would like to thank my family for motivating me and keeping me focused. Next, much much love to my wonderful working staff. Im more than excited for yall to see everything so, lets get it!” She slapped her hands together smiling hard and taking a pair of scissors. I watched on, with my cheeks damn near hurting and tears in my eyes, as Loryn cut the rope. “YES LORYN!” I yelled out clapping and whooping! Soon after everyone else joined in. 

L O R Y N

“Welcome to Naturals.” I hugged and welcomed everyone in. I was amazed by the crowd and was filled with joy. I couldn’t do anything but thank the Lord. My shop came out looking beautiful. Each hair dresser had their own personal space. I sat the flowers Kaiden got me on the receptionist desk and walked around. 

Seeing everyone smiling and enjoying their selves made my heart smile. “Congratulations beautiful.” Turning around I came face to face with Ace. “What are you doing here?” I haven’t heard from him in a while and now he decided to pop up. “I couldnt miss my girls day.” I leaned my head to the side and started to walk away. But then I thought, what good would that do? Knowing I was gonna end up in his bed later on. 

“Now Im your girl? I havent seen or heard from you in weeks. Whats that about?” I placed one hand on my hip and looked up at him. Ace sighed and stepped closer to me. “I had a drop to make out of town. Came back this morning and been resting up since then.” His hands were in his pockets. “And you couldnt let me know that?”

“So you could come up with every reason in the book to keep me from going?” He fired back. I had to give him that so I stayed quiet. “I gotta lil gift for you. You’ll get it later on tonight. “ He leaned down, kissed my lips and made his way over to my mom to greet her. I swear I couldn’t stand him at times but he made me happy. Looking around again, I stopped when I seen Lolani and Kaidens brother chalking it up the bar. 

He had to be saying some funny shit ‘cause she was smiling and laughing hard. Fuck they got going on? Deciding to leave it alone and ask later, I spotted Leilani and Londyn with Kaiden right behind her. “Hey yall.” I laughed a little approaching them. “Im loving the shop, its so spacious and classy.” I loved my twin. 

“I love the colors. I even took this bomb ass picture in the bathroom.” Leilani showed me the picture and I instantly gassed her. “You so fuckin fine.” One of the caterers walked around us a glass of champagne. “Congrats again sus!” I could get use to hearing that. 

—-

It was close to midnight when my guest left. I cleaned up with the help of my family, which only took half an hour. “Thank yall again, I cant express how much I love yall.” I handed my mom the keys and told her that I was riding home with Ace. She kissed my cheek and led them out the shop. “Im proud of you.” My dimples sunk in as my I looked down smiling. “Ready for ya gift?”

“More than ready.” I grabbed my belongings, grabbed his hand and waked out locking up behind us. He opened the car door for me and then made his way to driver seat. One settled into the car he reached in the back and pulled out a duffel bag along with small gift bags. He sat the duffel in my lap and opened it. When I say my mouth dropped. 

It was neatly stacked bills filled to the top. “Thats for emergencies. Put in somewhere safe.” Next he handed me the small bags and I went searching. The bag held an iced Pandora bracelet. “Damn,” was the only thing I could say. In the next bag was a gold Cuban link chain. “Ice me out then!” We laughed and he took the jewelry to place them on me. 

“Dont get fucked up out here Loryn, remember who ya man is.” I smacked my teeth and pushed his hand. “I dont need no reminder nigga.” He pulled me in for a kiss and pushed my seat back. “Now sit back and shut up while I enjoy myself.” Ace took my thighs and made me spread eagle. “Why you free ballin’?” 

I looked down as he placed small wet kisses on my second lips. “Stop teasing me and get to it.” He slid two fingers inside of my mouth and flicked my clit. “I didnt tell you to talk so shut up?” He drug his tongue from the top the of my clit down to my opening. I grabbed onto his head shoving pushing him further into my pussy. “Fuck yeah baby!” I gyrated my hips and leaned my head back enjoying the moment. This was definitely the best way to end the night.   

[absolutiions]

´   ･   .   ✶   ⧼    madchen   amick,   non   binary,   she   &   they   /   fucked   my   way   to   the   top   by   lana   del   rey   +   eyes   the   color   crimson   and   hands   stained   in   crimson,   too.   victim   of   the   underworld,   you   are   not.   you   came,   not   to   sit   silent   at   his   side   as   dutiful   wives   do,   but   to   whisper   in   his   ear.   pouted   lips   smeared   ruby   stoke   the   flames   of   his   darkest   impulses   and   his   deepest   desires.   you   are   the   conqueror.   you   are   the   queen.   and   may   god   have   mercy   upon   anyone   who   underestimates   this   :   because   you   will   not.    ⧽   ━━   don’t   look   now,   but   that’s   ATHENODORA.   the   TWO   THOUSAND,   FIVE   HUNDRED   &   TWENTY   TWO  (   varying   physical   )   year   old   GIFTED   VAMPIRE   has   been   here   in   seattle   for   three   minutes,   and   is   considered   a   member   of   the   VOLTURI.   they’ve   always   been   MACHIAVELLIAN   &   INDOMITABLE,   but   i   guess   this   town   just   brings   out   the   worst   in people   ;   apparently,   they’ve   been   way   more  INSOUCIANT   &   SUPERCILIOUS   than   usual.   it   wouldn’t   surprise   me   if   they   knew   what   was   going   on.   click   HERE   to   check   out   her   stats.

they   told   you   that   you   were   a   nobody,      so   you   became   the   QUEEN.   (   now   everybody   knows   your   name   )

SECTION ONE OF THREE : background / human era. trigger warnings for talk of pregnancy, death, abuse

born circa 502 bc, in a little village that has no lasting name nor impact in ancient greece. 

five of the children born to her parents survived to adulthood, and since she was the last one... it is almost like, her whole life, she has been suffering from younger child syndrome. who knew !

she very literally grew up in a diff time, so when i say she wasn’t rly close to any of her siblings, i don’t mean it in a like... horrible way. it’s not a reflection of character. they just didn’t have a tight sibling bond, though she loved them greatly. 

same w her parents. they were unexceptional people who lived unexceptional lives, and though she was grateful for, u know... their creation of her - they were not close. they did not, in laymans terms, have the lorelai and rory gilmore dynamic. 

her whole family were content to live their dismal lives, and... tho athenodora did not vibe, she, again - grew up in a diff time. of course she dreamt of more. of course she prayed to the gods for something better. but she was achingly aware of the fact that no such future would ever exist for her. such is life in 400 whatever bc, bumfuck, greece.

she was just barely eighteen when she was married to athanasios, to secure land, or smth, because those were the times. of course it was something like that. 

he was... fine, at first. a little small minded ( that wasn’t the ONLY thing that was small, haha ). he, like everyone, was content to live the same old life, and athenodora just... wasn’t. she had been raised on stories of grandeur, and her parents had thought she would settle for the regular - it should not have been a surprise that she didn’t want to, but gods, did she try.

she never loved him, she can safely say ; but she wished that she did. for a long while, athenodora thought it would be easier, and thought that she could do a lot worse. unfortunately... she cld not.

their lives were meant to follow a certain pattern. they had gotten married, and now he would work all day, make them money, tend their land. she would stay home. cook. clean. raise the children that they were sure to have. athenodora was capable of almost everything expected of her, except for the most important part - she couldn’t seem to give him children. not strong sons. not beautiful daughters. 

at first, he told her that it was fine. 

after a year or so, he still told her that it was fine, but she could see in his eyes that it wasn’t.

two years after this, he called her the ancient greek version of defective for the very first time - and things only got worse from there.

he had always been a perfectly fine husband, until he was not, and athenodora had always wanted to love him, until she did not. she prayed to the gods every morning and night, to give her what her husband so desired. to give her that which would make her life better, even if she knew it would not heal the wounds already caused.

sometimes the gods r not dicks. a miracle! she becomes pregnant, aged twenty four ( i kno it sounded like she was a crone but again please remember the times ). she always thought it was just what was best n only athanasios would care, but , wow... suddenly. she cares. she has never felt this level of love with anything, until now.

but, tragedy :// straight white men ( idk, i just feel like her husband was the root of all evil ) are not so easily satisfied. who wld have guessed he wld continue to be an abusive asshole even after his wife succeeded in getting pregnant? i bet i shocked u all. who wld have guessed that a huge part of his problem wld end up being that suddenly, athenodora clearly cares abt something - and it isn’t him. again. got you all!

over the course of her pregnancy, he becomes, for the first time, a real threat to her - or maybe, athenodora simply never took him seriously until there is another person to think of. either way, she TRULY fears him and what he’s capable of by the time she gives birth, and after he makes some passing remark abt their baby, she yeets the FUCK out of there in the middle of the night, eirene ( baby ) only a handful of days old. she takes what she can carry and nothing more, and she... makes it pretty far, thanks to the kindness of strangers. you love to see it.

she settles somewhere ( she considers to be ) far away, and she makes up a good story : her husband died in a war ( there were probably a lot of time, i dont know ) and she was widowed, left to care for their young daughter alone. i know. its really original. they didnt have tv shows back then to rip stories from though.

stays in a hovel on the edge of their village. think the shittiest home you’ve ever seen and then make it shittier. there are rumors about her being a witch, and she kind of appreciates them, because it keeps kids out of her yard. and shock of all shock : in spite of being... u know. a woman. and not very skilled. she finds a very hot ticket job - working for the very wealthy volturi family who live on the other ( opposite ) outside of town, but like, in a considerably better home, obviously. 

honestly, i don’t kno what the ancient greek equivalent of that secretary in new moon is, but that’s the vibe we’re going for, here. she’s like, a chambermaid or smth. and she makes a tidy little sum. doesn’t question her weirdo bosses that much. doesn’t know what anemia is because im p sure it wasnt discovered by then, but presumes they have it.

and maybe, just maybe, it’s the finesse of the century : or maybe, just maybe, it is destiny. in no time at all, she has caught the eye of the volturi’s most eligible bachelor(tm) : caius volturi. many another worker is made upset by this fact, as athenodora is very quickly alotted VERY special treatment as the apple of his eye, which includes, i don’t know... hand delivered baskets of pomegranates, a nicer home and in due time, the simple pleasures of the flesh.

so that’s pretty neat. and life’s pretty fine. she feels like an ancient greek sugar baby, and honestly, isn’t that all she’s ever deserved? she’s got some nice digs ( i don’t think she’d have called them that ) and a man who worships the ground she walks on and who spoils her with pretty things, and most importantly : she is taking care of her daughter, who i absolutely didn’t forget about. eirene is the literal light of athenodora’s life, and everybody knows it. if i say jean valjean and cosette vibes, can we all pretend we get it?

and then it goes to shit. as things do.

her daughter is fourteen years old, when her father finds them ; and she doesn’t know, she never knows, if he was seeking them out or whether it was all DUMB luck. regardless of it all, he is stood inside her home, his breath coming in angry half pants, and athenodora is convinced that this is it. that her end has come. that her freedom is over. she dies, she thinks, or she returns back to the house that was not her home with him. these are her options. 

she tells her daughter to leave. she stops him from following. when she is shoved and her head hits the table, she is aware of the option he has chosen for them more than all else - but the gods, or perhaps, just one - intervenes.

until this night, athenodora had never known the truth of the volturi. but when her beloved saves her from athanasios, she sees him for what he is. she UNDERSTANDS. and she isn’t frightened. she should be, for sure, she should be running as fast as she can - but all she can think in that moment is that she is free now in all the ways she has never been... and caius, her love, is something so much larger than this life. 

for the first time, the godhood that athenodora has always dreamt of is within her grasp. she makes him promise that once eirene comes of age, he will make her into the same creature that he IS. she makes him swear a solemn oath, and he who has been so infatuated by her for so long cannot argue.

four years. this is all it takes, and then eirene is eighteen - capable of standing upon her own two feet. athenodora leaves her everything - all the gifts she has ever been given, all the wealth accumulated, the home. everything she will not need, once she is gone. and she says a final goodbye.

caius turns her himself. the greatest gift he could ever give her.

and reborn, athenodora is MORE than everyone in her life could ever dream of being. she is the queen of the underworld, the goddess of death. she is all of this, and more. at his side, she finds GREATNESS. and once she had it, athenodora decided she would never again be without. 

SECTION TWO OF THREE : volturi era.

became cool. became powerful. very emma frost of her, rly 

didnt rly care for the rest of the coven outside of caius but sometimes u gotta hang w scrubs 

didyme dies sometime after her turning, and that kind of fucks everybody up

not so much her bc like i said she didnt rly care but... caius b frightened of losing her, i guess

kind of throws a spanner in the works 

she spends a lot of time ‘locked away’. not , like, literally ( bc that’s gross! ) but... caius takes over protective to the extreme

uses this time to harness her power and fuck

not always in that order

also spends a lot of time telling him he deserves to b leader

deserves to b the new aro

who needs powers?

not u, caius

go kick their ass baby i got ur flower-

( he doesn’t go kick their ass but man she wishes he wld )

she’s genuinely devoted to him, however, as much as it sometimes seems as if she’s using him as a means to an end

she DOES do that with a LOT of people, but caius... that’s her baby! her darling! her sweetie pie! fuck everybody else in this house caius, she respects YOU ! 

she jus wants to see him be the best there ever was, and he’s.... p... happy to giv her everything she wants, so their dynamic is actually p equal 

we love to see it

anyway lots of years happened and now she’s here

seattle sucks -athenodora’s official review

but she’s fucking SICK of aro’s shit and thinks her 2020 birthday wld be the best time for an official change of pace

obviously aro can read minds so he knows athenodora has high aspirations but he has learned his fucking lesson w killing ppls mates, i guess

lucky for her!

that’s all i got

hehe

SECTION THREE OF THREE : power.

athenodora is an ungifted vampire in twilight canon, but to that i say : fuck ya chicken strips. in equinox, she be special. her power is life force manipulation, in a pretty unique ( and dare i say ) way.

she was a forty two year old woman, when she was turned. she had lived a life, and she had the MARKS to show for it. but the very first time that she drank human blood from the vein, athenodora realized that she was not as unexceptional as she had always been lead to believe she was. vampires do not change. they’re frozen in time, like statues, portraits, photographs... and yet, before caius’ very eyes - athenodora did what no other vampire could. mere seconds passed, and suddenly ; she was stood before her beloved, decades younger. it lasted as long as her thirst was sated, with her age returning to her as her eyes darkened once more. and it happened all over again, when next she fed. 

over time, she’s come to understand it well enough. she has a particular love of younger humans ; those in their twenties, and thus, physical primes. she thinks that is, in part, down to her gift ; she seeks these out to drink from because when she feeds, she’s not simply drinking their blood, but also, their life force. she’s taking theirs to add to her own.

like many gifted vampires, she has spent time learning what she can of her gift, and learning whether there is some other way to apply it. it took almost two thousand years, but eventually - athenodora discovered that with a touch, her fingertips to their skin ( and a great deal of focus ), she could render another changed, also. it lasts for only a short amount of time - an hour, maybe a little longer, depending on how strong she is. but it works. and it makes her think that, in all her unlimited time : she might just be able to do even more. be a danger. manipulate life force in a way that can DESTROY. she’ll keep on working on that for as long as she lives. 

[plounce]

god ik its a wm au but I would Love to hear more about beauyasha in this au.. also like what has yasha been up to on earth? how does she interact with beau and caleb before molly arrives? 💜🕊

>:)))! i can absolutely do so!!

so in the first two or so seasons before all the heaven/apocalypse stuff, beau and caleb met yasha in an episode. she never SAID she was a valkyrie but that’s what they assumed she was, since she had a lot of viking stuff on her and the accent and she sort of implied that. it’s what made sense at the time, especially because they had no signs that angels are a real thing.

then molly happens, and then when yasha shows back up again they recognize each other and WHAT! YASHA’S AN ANGEL ACTUALLY?? crazy.

basically what happened is that at around 200 bce or so, yasha fell in love. i’m gonna say that zuala was another angel in her garrison, and angels aren’t supposed to fall in love. they’re supposed to be conforming divine warriors who don’t have all the flaws (or strengths, or texture, or spark) that humans do.

zuala was painted as the main culprit in this transgression. rather than making her Fall (les mis voice) as lucifer fell (because by that point they didn’t want to add any more True demons to hell’s side) for punishment, they decide to just obliterate her a la the hellfire in the last scene of the good omens tv show. it isn’t pretty. yasha is made to watch. she screams, and it makes the sun flare.

the rest of the angels are going to have their memories wiped of her - including yasha - but she learns of this in time and breaks through the floor of heaven and plummets to earth. molly helps her escape, but manages to avoid getting caught doing so.

molly was in the same garrison as them, and his memory of zuala was wiped with the rest of them. he remembers yasha, remembers being fond of her, remembers that she left heaven voluntarily and that he helped her, but there’s so many blank spots. they have him move garrisons to the tomb-takers after that, who are very elite and militant, and he becomes a demon-killing expert. it’s meant to drown out all that. and it kind of works; molly remembers more of yasha when he sees her again on earth.

yasha falls and falls and her angel blade slips from her hand as she dematerializes. it plummets and falls deep into some wilderness. a glint streaking down from the shooting star in the sky that night.

what happens next is the thing that happened with anna - yasha has no vessel lined up and she wasn’t given permission to leave, and is swiftly getting her grace cut off by heaven, and her being is transformed into a human baby. she is born, and grows up in a little scandinavian village a little bit strange. her parents tell her how there was a huge shooting star the night she was born, how they think it’s a good omen form the gods, and she has a sense that she’s different - special. she’s strong and naturally gifted with the club and the axe and especially the sword - anything they put in her hands.

when she’s old enough, she’s chosen to go on their clan’s raids. she excels at getting the resources her village needs from the southern peoples. she’s a terror, and everyone knows that she’s blessed from above.

then one year, she gets separated from the raiding party and is making her way through the forest trying to make it back to the coast so she can find their boat. and out of the corner of her eye she sees a strange glint, and something in her pulls her to go to it. it’s a strange sword embedded in the rock, and she puts her hand on it, and pulls –

and memories and power flood into her. memories of zuala, of creation, of molly, of heaven’s gleaming pathways, of zuala, of the first things that crawled on land, of zuala, of the face of god, of zuala, zuala, zuala. smiling, flying, fighting, touching, burning. she screams. her howl echoes through the woods.

her people have been waiting for her back at the boat, because they can’t leave their best warrior behind. when she strides out of the woods, she’s different. she walks different, and has this power radiating from her. she climbs on the boat, tells them to go. she’s almost glowing a little bit. they row away, and yasha spends the entire journey staring up at the sky, out at the horizon.

after that day she’s different. even quieter. everyone assumes she had a holy experience that day, and she doesn’t disagree, because, well. after that day she’s keenly aware of the norse gods’ presences, and doesn’t age. when she realizes that everyone is moving forward towards death without her (humans seem so small now - she loves her human parents, she does, but remembering what the sun looked like in its infancy changes a viking), she leaves, and goes to asgard, and pledges herself to the ranks of valkyries. she’s not nearly as strong as she once was, but she’s strong enough to fit in with her new people, so she finds herself a place there among the aesir.

(side note im keeping my distance from how this world interacts with non-abrahamic religions - thats SO not my business - just know theyve got their own power and their own places that aren’t like. Beneath that of abrahamic god. because iirc spn was terrible about that) (also i say abrahamic bc iirc islam has a lot of angels and demonology in its culture but thats all im gonna say bc again: i am not a theology major, and this au is much more about the surface fun of it all rather than making any statements or assertions about ACTUAL religions (past or present) obviously) (also i’m never gonna mention jesus or the antichrist or whatever)

the angel blade is tied to her grace. her grace still exists up in heaven, locked away in the archives, so the blade still has its source. it also contains her love for zuala and molly and - and all that she loved before she was torn apart - and that fuels it, connects it to her. gives her access to its power. she’s mostly just sort of supernaturally stronger and can take more of a beating than a normal human, and on certain days/times of year she can fly short distances. days that were holy to her. she carves norse runes on her blade, because it’s hers now. she can’t age or die of old age, but she still does have human needs - food, water, sleep. she’s tough, but if she’s unlucky then she can be killed. luckily, she’s very good at fighting.

her wings… they’re not like they once were. being with the valkyries makes humans see them like other valkyries’, but the aesir can see them for what they are - decayed, fragile, skeletal things, with what remaining feathers there are barely hanging on. like her feathers in cr proper.

after ragnarok, when the surviving aesir meet in the fields of asgard, yasha thanks them for their hospitality, and returns to midgard. she wanders for a while, mostly by herself. she helps when she sees people who need her help, but mostly she just keeps herself alive and moving. quiet, contemplative. loving god’s creation even though heaven hurt her deeply. she spends years not speaking to anyone. what happened to the aesir was traumatizing to her, and she’s secure enough that she doesn’t need what they gave her when she was “younger.”

at some point she makes her way to north america. she wanders, builds cabins, and when she stumbles upon the opportunity she watches over what she once watched over. she’s aware of Hunters but is uninterested in them - they’re not hunting for food and while they help widows and the grieving that’s not their Business. not her business.

flash forward to early season 2. we know beau and caleb by this point and the basic premise of the show and the world. on a hunt in montana beau and caleb take shelter in a cabin during a snowstorm, and in the middle of the night the door opens. beau is taking watch and shoves a gun up in the intruder’s face - but it’s just yasha, holding a deer carcass and looking distinctly unimpressed. “you’re in my house.”

beau stutters an apology, caught entirely off guard by the 6′5″ mountain of a woman, and yasha shoulders past her to the table to stoke the fire and clean her kill. it’s her dinner for next month, yasha gruffly explains when beau asks what she’s doing. don’t like supermarkets.

caleb wakes up to beau helping yasha cut away the entrails. he is very frightened and confused, but when beau gives the all-clear he calms down a little. not entirely, because he knows this woman is beau’s type, and they’re still on a hunt.

they explain what they’re up to to yasha, who nods. says she’s noticed things have been strange. and beau helped her, so. she’ll help them. she’s also bored, and has a good feeling about these two.

so she helps out with the hunt, and throughout the episode beau clumsily flirts with her and yasha never turns her down but also never Flirts back. there’s a tension that’s mostly powered by beau but isn’t shut down by yasha (yasha thinks beau’s sweet and attractive, and she’s taken some human lovers over the last two millennia, but is still devoted to the memory of zuala. the audience doesn’t know that thought). she and caleb connect on a We Are Both Quiet Introverts level, like they do in actual cr (reminiscent of the shaving scene after bowlgate).

it isn’t until the end that caleb and beau think she’s anything but a mountain lady. then she pulls out a HUGE GLOWING SWORD carved with RUNES and THERE’S SOMETHING BEHIND HER THAT LOOKS LIKE WINGS? and then she nods, says goodbye, and walks away into the woods before caleb and beau can pepper her with questions about what the fuck just happened.

they run after her, but can’t find her or the cabin again. in the car ride back to civilization, caleb theorizes that she might be a valkyrie, and beau’s like yeah that sounds appropriately sexy.

yasha is a fan favorite. she had a whole focus episode and she was so mysterious and cool! the audience clamors for her to be brought back, and are sad when she doesn’t show up for the rest of season 2. beau and caleb mention her a couple times, so it’s made plain that she isn’t TOTALLY a one-off, but… hm!

beaujester shippers already existed by this point (jester was in season 1 and again in season 2), and beauyasha gains some popularity. beau having attractions to both of them is present in the show, but she isn’t dating either of them. there’s significance to both of them - they’re both people beau thinks of when she thinks of having Somebody.

a lot of fic about yasha is written between seasons 2 and 4, theorizing about her life as a valkyrie and what her and beau meeting up would be like… which is all then jossed when angels happen in season 4.

caleb gets taken to hell at the end of season 3 because of ikithon and for beau. during his last couple days on earth, he begs beau to find jester. or hell, yasha. don’t be alone, please. live and be happy. go get - go get powerlifted by one or both of them. i heard you sleeptalk enough about that. and beau tells him to shut up, don’t talk like that, i’ll - i’ll find a way to bring you back. and then you can see me get gay married or whatever it is you want me to do. because i’m gonna get you out of there. and caleb smiles, and his eyes say we both know you won’t.

there’s a whole genre of fic about jester or yasha (or both) comforting beau and settling into hunting/domesticity with her or helping her rescue caleb after caleb gets dragged away btw. idk why im making up fake fic about this au but you know what. i deserve this.

yasha is sort of put out of mind in the heaven excitement of season 4 and the arrival of molly as a third companion, turning their duo into a trio half the time. the apocalypse stuff isn’t quite happening yet btw (this is where i start diverging from the seasonal structure of spn), it’s just angels being real and caleb and beau being mysteriously important to them.

there is one point where during the beginning of an episode about halfway through the season where they’re regaling molly with a story of one of their hunts - beau is trying to embarrass caleb with a time he got enthralled by a siren, and caleb bats back with well, at least i didn’t let a giant woman with a dead deer push my gun aside so she could skin the thing with no enchantments on me at all. and beau’s like AW CMON DUDE DONT BRING YASH INTO THIS.

then there’s a shot where their bickering dialogue continues but the camera is focused on molly, who tilts his head a little, considering, then takes a sip of his orange juice (he hates coffee - too bitter! if he’s going to consume something to keep up the idea that he’s human, it’ll be something that tastes good!). then it cuts to the car.

it’s intentionally ambiguous if that’s about caleb getting seduced by a siren, beau being embarrassed, or whatever - it’s just an odd little moment. which is significant when they’re up north again, four episodes later, in a little restaurant off the highway, and they’ve just finished their meal and talk about the season plotline is happening when the door SLAMS open, and booted feet stomp across the dirty tile, strong legs in worn jeans, a huge backpack - beau’s eyes widen - and there’s yasha, striding directly to their table with a look of utmost focus and determination.

beau goes to stand, caleb’s brow furrows - yasha, what are you doing here - what’s going on - when, before they can act, molly stands up, causing the table to rock and their cups to slosh over. yashael! he exclaims, his face split in incredulous delight. you’re alive! you survived! you’re okay - it’s been millennia! what are you doing here?! oh, i don’t care, get over here. and he goes to her, and she hugs him, and beau and caleb are standing there, slack-jawed, as stony stoic yasha cracks a wide smile and hugs molly and lifts him off the ground.

did… did mollymauk just say ‘yashael?’ caleb says, stunned. molly is cradling yasha’s face in his hands, and her cheeks are round with joy. beau’s imagination could never have given her this smile, and she’s jealous a little bit, but also in awe, but mostly also trying to process the two puzzle pieces that just locked themselves together that she thought were totally separate from each other.

(relevant posts to their reunion: art, text, text)

from then on yasha is part of their group, at least for that season. there’s a lot of caleb and beau commiserating over their attraction to two LITERAL ANGELS - especially when the truth of yasha’s fall is revealed. beau is torn up inside about all of it - an ANGEL, for the first part, and her dead angel lover (how could beau ever compete with an ANGEL) and, oh christ, molly’s odd humoring of her crush on yasha is cast in a new light now.

and then jester comes back and… well, now beau’s torn between two hot girls who are both important in the grand scheme of things! yipes!

it takes a long time and there’s probably also some romantic drama in that triangle etc, but beauyaster is endgame. because i have a huge fucking brain.