#their designs are inaccurate but oh well

[actualori]

in honour of flower husbands winning i drew my favourite fh au created by @thetomorrowshow

[free-moon-delivery]

firefly doodle

[stanpinesfan0410]

forgor to post some of these on here,..,,,,

eat up, barely-existant tuyy fandom 😋

[goldsainz]

# DREW STARKEY — ACTORS ON ACTORS !

MASTERLIST !

001. SUMMARY !

✯ drew and you participate in variety’s “actors on actors” series.

002. WARNINGS !

✯ cursing, talking about nude scenes, probably inaccurate acting experiences.

003. NOTE !

✯ sorry to all the actors i stole roles from😭 also zendaya is used as a face claim for the social media but the writing is inclusive and has no descriptors of physical appearance… or at least i hope so.

word count : 5,4k (chat i got carried away)

The cozy studio was bathed in warm light, designed almost as if to feel like a welcoming living room. Two plush chairs faced each other, separated by a low coffee table adorned with a few carefully placed books and a small vase of fresh flowers. Everything about the space was crafted to exude intimacy and warmth, inviting open conversation.

Drew Starkey entered the room first, his usual calm confidence mingled with a tinge of nervous energy. He smoothed his shirt absentmindedly and scanned the setup, trying to ground himself in the moment. He was used to being in front of cameras, but this felt different. This wasn’t just about promoting a project or answering rapid-fire questions on a press junket. This was you.

“Hello,” Drew started, a smile gracing his features as he took in the fact that he was sitting right in front of his number one celebrity crush. His hand hovered awkwardly in a small wave, as if he couldn’t believe this was real.

“Hi,” you said back, a giggle falling past your lips when you noticed his sheepish look. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” he said, his voice just a little higher than usual. Drew cleared his throat, laughing at himself, which made you laugh too. “Sorry, I’m… a little nervous.”

“Oh, don’t be,” you reassured him with a warm smile. “I promise, I don’t bite.”

“Good to know.” He chuckled, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “How are you doing?”

“I’m great, thank you. What about you?”

“Pretty good, can’t complain.” A laugh bubbled out of him, and subsequently, you. The way he rubbed the back of his neck made you think he was still pinching himself that this was happening.

The cameras rolled, capturing the easy charm and immediate chemistry between the two of you. 

Drew’s grin widened as he began. “First of all, let me just say—I’m completely starstruck right now. I mean, the way you completely own every role you take on... it’s incredible.”

Your eyes widened in surprise, a bashful laugh escaping as you waved off the compliment. “Oh, stop it. You’re making me blush!”

“I’m serious,” he pressed, leaning forward slightly. “You’re like… the blueprint. If I ever get even halfway to where you are, I’ll consider myself lucky.”

“Well, now you’re just flattering me,” you said, your voice teasing but your cheeks undeniably warm. “But thank you, that’s so sweet. And honestly, you’re being way too hard on yourself. You’re incredible in Queer. You’ve got this natural charm that just lights up the screen.”

“Natural charm, huh?” He smirked, pretending to preen, which made you laugh again. “I’ll take that.”

“Good,” you replied, smiling. “You should, because it’s true.”

Drew’s gaze softened, the teasing giving way to something more earnest. “That means a lot, really. Especially coming from you. You’re like… Hollywood royalty to many.”

You tilted your head, a playful smirk tugging at your lips. “To many, huh? And are you part of this many?”

Drew’s eyes widened, and he laughed, a little caught off guard. “Oh, absolutely. I’ve got a lifetime membership to the fan club.”

“Good to know,” you teased, crossing your legs and leaning back in your chair with an air of mock superiority. “I’ll have to start charging you membership fees.”

“Totally worth it,” he shot back, his grin widening.

“Well, thank you,” you said with a soft laugh, “So, we’ve both got some things in common, which I think is pretty cool.”

“Like working with Daniel Craig?” he asked.

“Yes! Honestly, I still reminisce about our time on set… he’s genuinely incredible, isn’t he?”

“He is, yeah. I found myself just admiring him and sort of forgetting I had to act too. He’s just… he’s on another level, for sure.”

“Daniel’s a master of his craft… Most of my scenes as Paloma in No Time To Die were with him, and at first I was so nervous because, like, what if I messed up in front of the Daniel Craig?” Drew let out a laugh at your words, and you couldn’t help but laugh too. “But when he noticed I was nervous he reassured me that it was all good. He’s just the best.”

“You’ve worked with so many high-profile actors.” You nod slightly at his words, as if it were the most common thing in the world. “Are you always nervous when meeting them, or was it just a Daniel thing?”

“It wasn’t just Daniel, no, but I think it depends. For example, when I did Oppenheimer with Cillian Murphy, for some reason I felt more relaxed… even though I had some nude scenes with him.”

“Nude scenes just make you connect, don’t they?” he joked, leaning back with a sly grin.

“They do, actually,” you replied, leaning into the banter. “You’d think they’d be worse, but honestly, with the amount of seriousness and concentration they take, it’s like you don’t have time to be nervous.”

“You clearly pulled it off flawlessly,” Drew said with mock solemnity. 

“You did too in Queer.” You compliment him, “I watched it a few days ago, and the chemistry you had with Daniel was just off the charts.”

Drew’s face lit up, a mix of pride and bashfulness crossing his features. “Daniel’s an amazing scene partner. He really made it easy for me to tap into everything.”

“Well, it shows,” you said. “It was such a raw and beautiful performance. I might’ve shed a tear or two.”

“Okay, now you’re just trying to make me blush,” Drew teased, pointing at you with a playful squint. “But seriously, that means a lot coming from you.”

“Hey, give credit where it’s due,” you shot back with a grin. “You’ve got this way of making everything feel so real. Like when you’re in pain, we’re in pain. When you’re in love, we’re falling right alongside you.”

“Wow,” he said, shaking his head as if to clear it. “I don’t know what to do with all these compliments. This is the best therapy session I’ve ever had.”

You laughed, crossing your legs and leaning forward slightly. “Well, I’m glad I could help. But now I’m curious—how did you prepare for a role like that? I mean, it’s so emotionally intense, no?.”

“It was a lot of journaling, a lot of talking with Luca about backstory and motivations,” Drew explained, his tone more thoughtful. “And honestly, I kind of drew from real-life experiences. Not the exact ones, obviously, but just feelings of vulnerability and… wanting to be understood.”

“That’s beautiful,” you said softly, your smile turning tender. “It’s amazing how much of ourselves we pour into these characters.”

“Exactly,” Drew agreed. “And sometimes it’s terrifying, but when it resonates with people, it feels worth it.”

“It definitely resonated with me,” you assured him. “And I’m sure with countless others too.”

“That’s really nice to hear,” he said with a soft smile.

“How was it for you to work with Luca? Because I remember it being one of the highlights of my career.”

Drew’s eyes lit up at the mention of Luca Guadagnino, and he leaned forward slightly, as if the memory itself was a magnet pulling him closer. “Oh, working with Luca was… incredible,” he said, his voice laced with awe. “He’s got this way of creating such a safe, open space on set. It’s almost like he’s not just directing—he’s inviting you into this world he’s building in his head.”

You nodded eagerly, your own memories of working with Luca bringing a nostalgic smile to your face. “I know exactly what you mean. He makes it feel like you’re collaborating on this deeply personal piece of art, rather than just executing someone else’s vision.”

“Exactly!” Drew said, gesturing animatedly. “And he has this way of pulling things out of you that you didn’t even know you had. Like, he’ll ask you one simple question, and suddenly you’re diving into this emotional rabbit hole.”

You laughed, tilting your head in agreement. “He asked me once, ‘What would this character, Maren in my case, dream about?’ and it completely changed how I approached the next scene.”

Drew’s mouth dropped open in mock surprise. “He asked me the exact same question!”

“No way!” you exclaimed, your laughter spilling out in disbelief. “I love that! It’s honestly such a deceptively simple question, but it opens up so many layers.”

“It really does,” Drew said, chuckling. “And then you’re sitting there like, ‘Okay, now I have to rethink everything I thought I knew about this character.’”

“It’s kind of genius, though,” you added. “He makes you work harder, but not in a way that feels forced. It’s like… he trusts you to figure it out, but he gives you these breadcrumbs to follow.”

“Exactly,” Drew said again, his tone growing softer. “I think that’s why his films feel so intimate, he gets the human part so right.”

You smiled, letting his words settle in the air for a moment. “I think that’s what makes working with him feel like such a privilege. It’s not just about telling a story—it’s about feeling it.”

Drew nodded, his gaze thoughtful. “And those are the moments that stick with you, you know? The ones where you felt something real, even if it was just for a moment.”

“Completely,” you agreed, your voice soft with sincerity. “Those moments are why we do this.”

For a moment, the two of you sat in companionable silence, the weight of the conversation settling in the cozy studio. Then, Drew broke the quiet with a grin. “Okay, but did Luca make you do those impromptu rehearsals at, like, the crack of dawn?”

“Oh my God, yes!” you burst out, your eyes widening. “I’d just roll out of bed with zero coffee and somehow be expected to pour my soul into a scene.”

Drew laughed, his face lighting up. “Right? It’s like, ‘Good morning, here’s your emotional breakdown for the day.’”

You laughed along with him, the shared experience adding another thread to the easy camaraderie forming between you. “But honestly, I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.”

“Same,” Drew said, his expression softening again. “For Luca? Anytime.”

“Absolutely,” you agreed, your eyes locking with his for a moment before the warmth of the studio light reminded you both that the cameras were still rolling.

Drew shifted in his seat slightly, his expression thoughtful. “You know, it’s kind of wild—hearing you talk about all these incredible experiences. You’ve been doing this for so long, and yet it’s like you’re just getting started.”

You tilted your head with a small smile. “That’s sweet of you to say. But yeah, I guess I have been in this industry for most of my life. It’s all I’ve ever really known.”

Drew’s eyebrows lifted. “That’s crazy to think about. I didn’t even consider acting until after college. You must’ve been, what, ten? Eleven?”

“Eight, actually,” you corrected with a chuckle. “My first role was in this little indie film. I was basically just the kid who ran around in the background eating ice cream, but I thought it was the coolest thing ever.”

He laughed, clearly amused. “That’s adorable. And now you’re the Hollywood It Girl. No big deal.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, your laughter light. “Oh, stop it. But yeah, it’s been a journey. Growing up on sets definitely shaped me, for better or worse. Sometimes I wonder what it would’ve been like to have a more ‘normal’ childhood.”

Drew’s smile softened. “That must’ve been such a whirlwind. I can’t even imagine starting that young. I didn’t even think about acting seriously until high school.”

“Oh, I’ve read about that!” You said, your voice lighting up. “You were all about sports growing up, right?”

“Yeah,” Drew admitted with a chuckle. “I was your typical small-town kid—baseball, basketball, you name it. I was convinced I was going to go pro in something, but clearly, that didn’t pan out.”

“Well, I think acting suits you pretty well.” 

“Thank you,” he says with a soft laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “But yeah, the real shift happened in high school when I joined a drama class. It was all Samuel Beckett and absurdist plays, which at the time I thought was the coolest thing ever.”

You leaned forward, intrigued. “So that’s what pulled you in? Drama class?”

“Pretty much,” he said with a nod. “And then I went to Western Carolina for college. I double-majored in English and theater, thinking, ‘If this acting thing doesn’t work out, I’ll at least have a backup plan.’”

“That’s so realistic of you,” you said with a laugh. “Meanwhile, I was ten, telling anyone who’d listen that I was going to win an Oscar one day.”

“And look at you now,” Drew said, gesturing to you with an almost reverent smile. “You made it happen.”

You chuckled, a bit flustered by his admiration. “Well, not quite, just an Oscar nominee for now. But thank you. You know, I think your journey’s pretty incredible too. A double major? That’s no joke. And starting later in the game like you did… it must have felt like a slow burn, but it’s clearly paid off.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Drew said thoughtfully. “It was definitely a slower burn for me. I didn’t land my first real gig until I’d been auditioning for what felt like forever.”

“I think that makes your journey even more special,” you said, your tone sincere. “You came into it with all this life experience and maturity. It shows in your work, you know? There’s this depth to your performances that’s just… rare.”

Drew’s ears turned a little pink, and he laughed softly, glancing down at his hands. “Wow, you’re gonna make me blush over here.”

“Good,” you said with a teasing smile. “It’s only fair after all the compliments you’ve been throwing my way.”

He looked up, his grin sheepish but warm. “Touché. But seriously, hearing that from someone like you—someone who’s been at this for so long and is so insanely talented—it means a lot.”

“Well,” you replied with a playful tilt of your head, “I think it’s safe to say we’re officially mutual fans.”

Drew laughed at that, the sound easy and genuine. “I can live with that.”

The conversation shifted into more comfortable territory as the two of you shared experiences, trading stories about acting and the film industry. Drew, now feeling at ease, leaned forward with renewed interest.

“You know,” he began, a thoughtful expression crossing his face, “I've been thinking about how different TV shows and movies are, especially when it comes to the pacing and character development. Like, in a show, we have to maintain this ongoing energy for the characters over multiple seasons. But with movies, it’s a totally different vibe, right?”

You nodded, understanding immediately where he was going. “It’s definitely a huge shift. With TV, you’re given time to build on a character slowly. Every episode is another chapter, so you can explore new facets of them and keep the audience hooked for longer periods of time. But movies, they’re this intense sprint. You have to get everything across in just two hours or so, but in a way that feels just as layered and satisfying.”

Drew's eyes lit up with excitement, clearly passionate about the topic. "Exactly! You have to balance the action and suspense while still giving the characters these moments of vulnerability. Over multiple seasons, you can really let them grow and change. It's like a slow burn. But when you're doing a movie, you don’t have the luxury of that buildup. It has to be this concentrated emotional punch right from the start.”

“That’s one of the biggest challenges of film, for sure," you agreed. "In a film, every second counts. You can’t afford to waste a moment. But I think what’s also interesting is how both mediums can explore a character’s journey from different angles. TV shows can dive into their backstory in more detail, but movies... they really need to hit those emotional beats and leave an impact without dragging it out."

Drew smiled, clearly engaged in the discussion. “In TV shows you need that perfect balance of suspense, character development, and personal growth. And then, at the end of the season, you drop a huge bombshell that leaves people wanting more.”

You laughed, raising an eyebrow playfully. “Sounds like you’ve been doing some serious thinking about it. What’s the secret to keeping the audience hooked without losing the depth of your character?”

He leaned back, his expression thoughtful. “Well, I think it’s about letting the characters evolve with the story. You need to make sure the audience sees the human side of your character, even when they're in these crazy situations. It’s what keeps people invested in the long run.”

“You’ve really got the process figured out,” you said with a smile. “But you’re right—it’s a different rhythm for TV. With a movie, you get to go deep quickly, but with a show, you have to keep it dynamic and varied. And let’s not forget, you need that cliffhanger at the end to make people binge-watch the next season.”

Drew’s eyes twinkled with mischief. “You’re giving away all the secrets! Next thing you know, people will be expecting a cliffhanger every time they watch a movie."

“Well, movies and TV are both art, but they demand different approaches,” you said, “and you’re doing an amazing job balancing both. I’m honestly so excited to see where your career goes next. Both worlds are lucky to have you.”

He chuckled softly, clearly humbled. “Thanks. I think I’m just lucky to be a part of both. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be in a show that gets people talking for days?”

“Right? You’ve got Outer Banks, which has such a dedicated fanbase, and then movies like Queer that touch people in such a different way. It’s amazing to watch your versatility.”

He leaned in slightly, a playful glint in his eyes. “I’m just trying to keep up with you. Honestly, your transition from action to more emotional roles is inspiring. I hope I can pull off something even close to what you’ve done with your career.”

Your smile softened, your voice sincere. “Well, you’re already doing it, Drew. You’re already there. It’s not just about the roles—it’s about the heart you put into them. And you’ve definitely got that.”

Drew’s smile faltered for a moment, the weight of your words sinking in. His gaze softened, as if he were truly reflecting on what you’d said. He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms but keeping his eyes on you, his expression thoughtful.

“It's crazy, isn't it?” He began, his voice a little quieter now, “The idea of giving so much of yourself to something that feels so... intimate. But when it works, when the audience feels it too, there's nothing like it.”

“Exactly,” you agreed, your voice a little quieter now. “That's the real magic, when the audience feels like they know the characters, like they're right there with them. It’s not about the plot twists or the fancy sets—it’s about the emotions that we build and share with them.”

Drew nodded thoughtfully, his gaze drifting away for a moment before returning to you. “Speaking of emotions, I just saw your new movie, We Live In Time,” he said, his voice taking on a softer tone. “It’s one of those films that stays with you, you know? It’s raw in a way that makes you uncomfortable, but it’s also beautiful. How did you tap into that for Almut?”

Your expression softened as you thought back on the experience. We Live In Time had been a journey—a raw, almost therapeutic one. “It was an emotional rollercoaster, honestly,” you said, leaning back slightly, letting the memory settle in. “I think the hardest part was showing that moment where her whole world shifts. It was such a raw, profound type of emotion I had to channel in order to do justice to the character and her experiences.”

Drew sat back, letting the weight of the conversation settle. “I think that's what makes your career so incredible. You never just play a character. You become them. And you take us with you. Every heartbreak, every triumph, every moment of doubt... we feel it all with you. That's what makes your work so powerful.”

You met his gaze, feeling the depth of the conversation linger between you both. “It’s all about connection, right? Connecting with the character, with the audience, and with the emotions that we all share as humans. Because at the end of the day, we’re all just trying to make sense of time, love, and the moments we get.”

Drew smiled, his expression genuine and soft. “Well, you’ve definitely made sense of it for me. We Live In Time—it’s not just a movie. It’s a reminder to cherish what we have. And that, in itself, is something special.”

You smiled back, your heart full as you let the words sink in. “Thank you, Drew. That’s really sweet of you.”

You both shared a comfortable silence for a moment, before Drew broke it with a playful grin. “You know, it’s clear you’ve mastered the art of vulnerability on screen, but I can’t help but wonder—did you ever have moments on set where it was just... impossible to take things seriously?”

You laughed, the sound light and genuine. “Oh, absolutely. In fact, as a kid, it was all impossible to be serious,” you admitted, shaking your head at the memory. “I remember this one time during a scene on set when I was probably around 9 or 10. We were supposed to be doing this emotional scene, and I had to cry on cue. But instead of crying, I couldn’t stop giggling. It was a dramatic moment, and my co-star was all serious and trying to get through the scene, but I just... lost it.”

Drew raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. “Giggling during a dramatic scene? What happened?”

“Well, my director, bless her heart, kept trying to give me these 'serious actor' looks. She was this no-nonsense kind of woman, and she had this way of narrowing her eyes when things weren’t going well. I tried my best to hold it together, but then my co-star—who was way too good at being serious—looked at me and just gave this super intense stare, and that was it. I burst out laughing right in the middle of the take.”

Drew chuckled, shaking his head. “I can just picture that. You were probably trying to hold it together, but it must have been so hard with all that tension in the air.”

“I swear, the more I tried not to laugh, the harder it became,” you continued, grinning at the memory. “It was one of those moments where you’re like, 'Why am I even here? I can’t do this.' But somehow, I got through it. The director had to take a deep breath, and we did a few more takes. Eventually, we got it done, but I think we all were on the verge of cracking up the whole time.”

Drew let out a laugh, clearly imagining the scene. “I can’t blame you. I feel like as a kid, you have no filter. Everything feels like a joke, and it’s so hard to be serious when everyone else is trying so hard.”

“You have no idea,” you said, your voice still light. “There were so many times I’d be doing a serious scene, and I’d start thinking about something random, like a certain meme or a funny sound someone made on set—and then, bam, it was game over. I’d be holding in a laugh like my life depended on it.”

Drew smirked, leaning in a little. “I totally feel that. I mean, as an adult, I still have moments where I struggle to keep a straight face. I once had a scene where I was supposed to be super intense, but the prop guy was standing just out of frame, and he made this ridiculous face at me—completely threw me off. I couldn’t stop laughing, and it ended up taking hours to finish the scene because we kept cracking up. Honestly, I think the crew started to get annoyed with us after a while.”

“See?” you said with a grin. “It never really changes. Truthfully, the older you get, the harder it becomes to hold it in. But then you look at the footage and realize how much fun you actually had, and that makes it all worth it.”

Drew nodded thoughtfully, a playful twinkle in his eyes. “Yeah, that’s the thing. Sometimes it’s the moments you didn’t plan for that end up being the most memorable. Like when you have a laugh on set, and suddenly you feel closer to everyone, even though you’re supposed to be in character.”

“Exactly,” you said, your smile widening. “There’s something so beautiful about those unscripted moments. It reminds you that acting is, at its core, about connecting—whether that’s through laughter or the heavy stuff. And even though I had my fair share of giggling fits as a kid, I think those moments taught me just as much as the serious ones. Maybe more.”

Drew leaned back in his chair, a thoughtful look crossing his face. “It's funny how those little moments—like a laugh in the middle of a serious scene—can end up being the ones you remember the most. I think those are the ones that make the work feel real, you know?”

You smiled, your gaze distant as you reflected on the years of working on sets. “I know exactly what you mean.”

“Yeah, like those unscripted moments,” Drew added, his voice quieter now, as if the weight of the sentiment lingered in the air. “They give the performance an authenticity that you can’t get from just following the script to a tee.”

You nodded, the words hanging between you like a shared understanding. “Exactly. And as a kid, I was so focused on getting it ‘right’—on being perfect—that I missed the beauty of just being in the moment. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized how important it is to let go of the idea of perfection. It's in those mistakes, the wrong takes, the bloopers—that's where you find the truth.”

Drew's expression softened, his eyes meeting yours with a sincerity that made your chest tighten. “I think it’s key not to be afraid to show the mess, the imperfect parts of a character, because that’s what makes them human.”

A small chuckle escaped you, the warmth of the moment filling the studio. “Right? We’re all just a little bit of a mess, trying to figure it out, but that’s what makes the journey worth it. We’re constantly learning, constantly evolving, and we bring that to our work. The growth, the mistakes—it all shapes us.”

Drew nodded, his gaze shifting as if reflecting on those same ideas. “Yeah, and the growth never stops, does it? Just when you think you’ve figured it out, something new happens, and it challenges you again.”

“That's the beauty of it,” you said, your voice quieter now, the bond between you both deepening. “The challenge is what keeps it exciting, keeps you moving forward.”

Drew grinned, a playful spark lighting his eyes once more. “Well, I guess we’re both lifelong students of this thing called acting, huh?”

“Absolutely,” you said with a laugh, the lightness returning. “And just like any good student, we’ll always be learning. Who knows, maybe we'll even get better at not laughing in the middle of dramatic scenes.”

Drew let out a hearty laugh, nodding enthusiastically. “I think that’s going to take years of practice, honestly.”

You both shared a moment of genuine laughter, the warmth of your conversation filling the space around you. You leaned back into the chairs, the laughter still lingering in the air, a sense of camaraderie that made the space between you feel comfortable and open. You continued sharing stories, moving seamlessly from one experience to the next.

The conversation began to slow, the easy flow of stories fading into a comfortable silence, as you both shared an unspoken understanding. The light laughter that had filled the room now felt like a warm, lingering hum between you.

Drew shifted slightly in his chair, his gaze turning toward you with a subtle, thoughtful expression. “You know,” he began, his voice softer now, “I really hope we get to work together sometime. I think it’d be incredible. It’s the kind of thing where I can already imagine what it’d be like. Just... easy, real. Like this.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his words, but you kept your composure, offering a smile that spoke volumes. “I’d love that. If you receive a call from your manager these days… maybe I had something to do with it, so be prepared.”

The air between you both was charged, the quiet intensity of the moment not lost on either of you. There was something unspoken, something deeper that neither of you addressed outright but that seemed to hang there all the same. The connection was undeniable, yet it lingered in the silence, unspoken, but clear.

Drew finally broke the spell with a playful grin, his eyes flicking back to yours. “Oh, I’ll be ready. Can’t wait to see what magic we create together.”

You returned his smile, your heart racing ever so slightly, though you kept it hidden behind the ease of your words. “I’m sure it’ll be something incredible.”

As the interview wrapped up, there was a lingering sense of something unspoken between you both, an attraction that neither of you had to mention but was so clearly felt. The kind of connection that could only be hinted at, but would never truly fade. It was the kind of moment that would stay with both of you long after the cameras stopped rolling.

“Thank you,” you said softly as the final moments of the interview started to loom, your voice carrying a depth that reflected everything unsaid between you. “This has been amazing. Honestly, it feels like we’ve been talking for hours, and yet it still doesn’t feel like enough.”

He nodded, his expression soft but genuine. “I feel the same way. This has been one of the most honest and open conversations I’ve had in a long time.”

The crew began to pack up, signaling that the interview was at its end, but neither of you seemed in any hurry to break the moment. The usual chatter and movement around you felt distant, as if the two of you were in your own world for just a little longer.

“You know,” Drew said, his voice quieter now, a hint of sincerity threading through, “I think we make a pretty good team even just sitting here talking. Imagine what we could do with a whole script.”

Your smile softened, and you nodded, the words feeling right, but the undertone of something more—something unsaid—hung in the air. “Yeah, I think we’d be unstoppable.”

The moment stretched between you both, filled with the kind of comfortable tension that comes when you realize you’ve shared something real. Something that felt like it could turn into something more.

You both stood up, a final, lingering moment before the usual goodbye. Drew extended a hand, his gaze holding yours a beat longer than necessary.

“Take care, okay?” he said, his voice warm, like the words carried more than just a polite farewell.

You shook his hand, the warmth of his touch lingering just a moment longer than expected. “You too, Drew,” you replied, your voice soft yet carrying an undercurrent of meaning that mirrored his own.

As you turned to gather your things, you couldn’t help but glance back over your shoulder. He was still standing there, watching you with that same thoughtful expression, his hands casually tucked into his pockets. The faintest smile curved his lips, as if he were replaying the conversation in his mind.

“See you around,” he called out, the words simple but loaded with promise.

“Yeah,” you said, meeting his gaze one last time. “See you around.”

Walking away, you felt a peculiar lightness, as though something intangible had shifted, leaving you both exhilarated and curious. It wasn’t every day you met someone who made you feel seen in such a profound way, and as you left the studio, you found yourself smiling, a quiet hope blooming in your chest.

And for a fleeting second, you allowed yourself to wonder what could come next.

[realcube]

oh and similarly, pro hero!tenya iida is THE dilf

the hot single dad you see at kids' baseball game and ballet recitals, always cheering and clapping the loudest. sporting cargo shorts, running shoes, and polo shirt that accentuates his buff arms.. who is also a bit too overly competitive/involved in a children's activity: consantly berating the referee for their lack of attentiveness to clear foul-play, or debating with the dance contest judges about inaccurate scores. but it's okay because he's cute hence he is allowed to #pretty privilege

i just know he is raising the most well-behaved kids too. when one of them accidentally bumps into to because they were goofing off in the supermarket, he'll stand over them and demand they say sorry. which they timidly do, and it was uncomfortable to be in that position, but it's worth it for the apologetic smile tenya flashes you, before ushering his kid away.

and pls don't get me started on an au where you are his kids' elementary school teacher. he firmly believes educating is one of the most important, diginified and unappreciated careers there is, so he was already buying gifts for the staff throughout his kids' pre-school. however, after the first parent-teacher meeting and he sees you're their new teacher, the gifts that were previous things like candles and mugs, quickly turn into designer perfumes and luxury chocolate. (none of the chocolate ever sees the inside of your mouth though bc ppl steal it in the staff room 😔). and the gifts become far more frequent too: he used to only buy them at christmas, but you receive presents from the iida kids on new years, teachers' day, easter, your birthday, valentines in addition to chistmas.

you better believe he is signing up to be an assistant for all the extra-curriculars too. under the guise of wanting to contribute to the school, but really because he wants to spend time with you. need a parent-helper for a class field trip? iida volunteers expeditiously. looking for donations for the bake sale? iida brings in six trays of home-made cupcakes (and one for you too). struggling to direct the school play on your own? iida comes in and runs that stage like it's the goddamn military. pro-heroing essentially becomes a side hustle, while he's your full-time assistant. (and he's definitely parent council president too. and if the school doesn't have a parent council, he'll create one.)

[kaiser-s-bitch]

Can everyone PLEASE stfu about video game characters’ skin tones??

I would like to remind everyone that just because Hoyo is taking INSPO from irl regions and cultures, it absolutely does not mean that they’re trying to be "historically accurate" in any way.

I would personally also enjoy seeing certain characters with a lot more melanin, I also enjoy the edits of people making that happen. But I don’t go around hating and shitting on an otherwise perfectly fine character designs JUST because of the skin tone.

Of course I generally do understand that some people would prefer more "diversity" and would like for Hoyo to be more "accurate in their representations". But then again: they’re NOT TRYING to accurately represent anything!!

Just look at the Liyue characters, the region clearly referencing the Chinese culture: No Chinese person naturally has pale blue hair and eyes (Chongyun). No Chinese person has platinum blond hair and red eyes (Ningguang) (edit: YES except for people with albinism but that’s beside the point here). Even Yun Jin, arguably the most "Chinese" character is not ACCURATELY Chinese. Know any Chinese person with bright red eyes? No? Thought so. And no one’s been hating on/complaining about that.

Same goes for all other characters: they’re not meant to be REALISTIC. No one is talking about their "inaccurate" eye colors, body types etc, everyone is focusing on and getting worked up over SKIN TONES, of all things. It doesn’t make any sense.

Hoyoverse is a Chinese company, and it’s no secret that the Chinese are generally fond of paler skin tones, and therefore paler characters sell well. That alone doesn’t make them racist, and it does not warrant the amount of hate their newer characters are getting all around (atm Ororon specifically).

It’s giving: "I like pizza!" -"Oh, so you hate pasta".

The worst part about this is the fact that most of the people hating the most insistently are WHITE, trying to be self-important. It’s embarrassing tbh.

———

Sorry for this little outburst, I just had to get this off my chest. I might be missing some pieces to the puzzle that some of you might be aware of, but I’m just sick and tired of people hating all around bc of this.

[yagiichan]

cod x fem!reader EDC Week

cod x fem!reader

cod members reaction to you when they first see you out of your tactical gear, and you’re actually dressed up for EDC.

Warning: mentions of smut, 18+ Minors DNI, language. Mentions of breeding.

A/N: EDC literally just happened in my city, and I’ve been into the COD x reader stories recently. It’s not going to be anything impressive, but I hope ya’ll like it. Again, this is my HC for whatever reason. IDK, I don’t really make sense to myself neither, so don’t @ me. :3 This is also my first time posting on tumblr, so please be nice.

FYI I do not know a whole lot of lore, I’m just here for the fun of it, so please do not flame me for any inaccurate/unplausible storytelling I am about to convey.

P.S. I drew the design of the dress, but I referenced an image on pinterest. I apologize as I do not know the original artist for the figure.

----------------------------

Chatter amongst the operatives broke out, as everyone began filing out of the room, from another long debriefing. You were new to the squad, and just barely began speaking to anyone. Layered in heavy combat armor, and face covered with a balaclava and dark round shades every time you’re on base. You don’t like it when people gawk at you, especially when conducting professional business.

You find it easier when you’re covered up. People treated you like a normal soldier, rather than a piece of meat. Though, doesn’t really stop the flirtatious comments coming from your companions.

Soap would linger sometimes, making fun little passes, “What’ve you got hidin’ under there, bird?” You’d laugh him off and just tell him nothing he’d be interested in. He’d quip back “Bet there’s loads I can find interesting, dove…” You continue to laugh, making your way down the dim hallway. The other members, following behind. Gaz would chime in with a “knock-it-off” comment every now and then, but he was just as curious how you’d look too.

Pretty much, everyone has seen one another, considering how long they’ve been enlisted together, so it’s no surprise that fresh meat would immediately attract the attention of wolves.

Ghost, Konig, and Horangi followed from behind, watching you laugh.

“What’s the fresh meat good at anyways?” Ghost asked nonchalantly. Horangi shrugged his shoulders, with a soft “mm-mm”. Konig shook his head at the both of them “Hand-to-hand combat and reconnaissance. Apparently, she’s managed to close the distance on the Captain and threw him straight into the wall.” Ghost scoffed, attempting to burn a hole in the back of your skull. “She is? Look at her” he pointed with his chin, “A literal fuckin’ gnome is what she is.” Horangi chortled a little bit, Konig staying silent.

Price picking up on their conversation, cleared his throat, “You’ll see in due time lads. Someone like that can be the least expected.”

“So, since it’s the start of the weekend why don’t we start with a bang and head down to the pub for a fill?”

 Soap suggested eagerly. The week prior had been incredibly taxing, so everyone was privy to the idea, besides you.

“Oh, no, I’m sorry. I’ve actually got plans this weekend,” you sheepishly laughed. Soap whined, prodding you on what your plans are. You didn’t budge, only that it was already planned some time ago and you can’t miss you. Despite the constant badgering, Soap deflated in defeat, as Gaz patted his back. Despite the initial rejection, Soap bounced back almost immediately.

Chatting away with you, talking about coming out with them another time. You laughed along, apologizing that you couldn’t attend now, but promised to meet in the future.

Making your way towards your apartment complex on base, you noticed everyone else also shuttling into the freight elevator with you. You tilted your head in confusion, queueing Price,

“Well, we all share the same apartment complex. Compliment of the base we currently reside on. Wants to make sure we’re on the ready for when things go down.”

 You slowly nodded in understanding. You clicked your floor number, 10 and noticed that nobody else clicked a floor number besides 14. You looked at Price again, who sheepishly explained that squads are assigned to their own floors. That, since you’re now part of their operation, you’ll probably need to get the changes made soon.

“S’pparently supposed to bring us ‘closer’, build a bond with one another?”

You hummed in acknowledgement, thinking it was cute, “Yeah, I suppose it makes sense.” Chatter continued, until you reached your floor. Getting off, you said your goodnights to everyone. Soap continued to moan, hoping to get a glimpse of you at some point. Gaz agreeing, and Price chuckling at them.

The brooding bunch discussed themselves the best bar to pick from for the night. As the elevator finally reached their floor Soap clapped his hands together “Welp! How’s bout we all meet up again in an hour aye? Freshen up a lil bit. Maybe catch us a pretty bird tonight,” wiggling his eyebrows with the suggestion.

Sighing at Soap’s obvious desperation everyone agreed to meet in the hallway before heading down to the pub.

“Right! Now, let’s get this party started!” Soap howled, looking like he pregame’d before meeting up with the crew.

Everyone had transferred themselves into fresher clothing, finally peeling away the grime of the week. Excitement slowly brews in the group as they can finally wind down for the weekend. Although everyone had changed into more comfortable attire, the three brooding bunch kept their visages concealed.  All members shuffling into the freight elevator, chattering happily amongst themselves.

As the freight elevator begins its slow descent towards the ground floor, it suddenly stops at floor 10. Voices begin to hush as the door slowly slides open, revealing a woman with a high slit dress, stopping at the waist. Four thin black bands wrapped around strong thighs.

Her upper torso covered with black cloth besides the diamond cut pattern, exposing her breasts with dangerous allure. Her lower face covered by a black cloth that looked infused with the rest of the dress, leaving only her eyes visible, and hair to flow freely.

The unknown woman continued to adjust herself, before looking up into the elevator, capturing the eyes of every man on board.

----

Your eyes gleamed with happiness, pulling your mask down, smiling brightly at the lot.

“Hey team!” You chirped.

Silence.

“Heading out to the pub now?”

More silence. Eyes continued to stare you down. Not sure what to make of who you are. You started to feel awkward. Not realizing that this is their first time seeing you, especially like this.

“Erm… well then, off we go…? Heh…” you laughed nervously, with the door sliding closed once more, and the lift beginning its descent once more.

The ride down was silent and awkward, at least for the men. You just continued to tap away at your phone, not a care in the world, making plans to meet your friend at the festival entrance.

“(Y/N)?? Is that you?” Gaz piped up, still inspecting you from head to toe. You turned towards Gaz, nodding your head and smiling.

“Suppose this is the first time you guys have seen me outside of my Michelin Man outfit huh?”

You laughed at your own joke, not ever noticing the way their eyes grew hungrier by the second.

You never noticed the way Price stood just a little bit closer, in hopes of accidentally bumping into you. He’d blame it on how crowded the elevator was.

You never noticed the way Soap suddenly started spilling all over his words. His face slowly heating up with every time you laughed at his silly antics.

You never noticed the way Gaz was literally, so star struck, only nodding and laughing at whatever you were saying.

You never noticed the way Ghost suddenly stood up a little straighter, rather than leaning towards the rail of the elevator, trying to make himself look taller. More attractive for you.

Or the way Horangi adjusted his glasses every now and then to make sure you don’t catch him staring at you.

Or the way Konig began to fidget anxiously, staring intently at your being, hands held together to hide something that slowly began to rage in his pants. He was sweating profusely.

“Konig?” you questioned, staring up at the hulking 6’10” man.

Shit.

“Are you alright? You’re sweating up a storm.” Everyone began to turn towards him, suddenly finding himself embarrassed. With a few ‘legit’ coughs Konig spoke.

“Just need some air s’all.” He played it off way too cool. The others glared at him with jealousy when you showed concern for him. Konig, though his face not visible to others, smiled a triumphant smile under his facemask.

You smiled brightly at him, breathing a sigh of relief, tugging at his heartstrings even more. Glances were stolen every now and then by your team members. Assessing your body, and trying to determine if it’s the trick of the light, or your thighs are just that delicious. Toned, large, and ready to crush heads.

Oh, how they wished to have their heads between your legs. To have that pretty black dress lifted over their heads, and to hear your sweet voice calling out their names in ecstasy. Your hair sticking to your skin, drenched in the sweat and tears of your pheromones.

To watch the rise and fall of your heaving chest, as your honey coats their face and tongues. Once you’ve had your high, the dress comes off and you smile that bright smile at them, hands cupping their faces whisper-begging.

“Come here, darling… Come to me. I need you, so badly.” You’d pant out, with tears in your eyes, and a wobbly smile on your face, just begging to be ravaged by them. To be pumped with their loads.

Oh, they all wanted you, and you didn’t even know it.

The ride down felt like forever, until the soft ding of elevator is heard throughout, indicating your destination of the ground floor.

----

“So, where are you heading, dressed up like this?” Price inquired.

“EDC. It’s going on for 3 days, but I’ll only be going for two.” You stated excitedly.

“EDC? Wassall that then hen?” Now Soap asking the questions.

“It’s just a music festival. Electric Dance Carnival. Been dying to go, and since we’re out here I wanted to take the chance.” You informed the bunch. They all walked along side you, the rest in silence as Soap continued his barrage of questions.

“Oh, but I won’t be getting insanely lit or anything like that! It’s just an opportunity is all! I’m meeting some friends.” You corrected yourself, not wanting to have your team think you’re some sort of degenerate (hehe).

As you continued to happily chat away, your taxi pulled up. Bounding towards the door you turn back towards your fellow soldiers, not missing a beat.

“Ay, be safe, okay? If you need anything, don’t hesitate to phone me.” You chirped once more.

“Anyways, I’m off then! Be seeing you around!” You waved as you got into your taxi, driving away into the city.

----

Sitting around a table, with a dimly lit light hanging above them, Ghost groaned at the thought of phoning you to let you know that he isn’t feeling well. That he might need some of that ‘comfort’ you were giving to Konig earlier. Felt kind of sweaty. Might need you to take care of him, if you get what I’m laying down.

Price, Konig, and Horangi sat around the table, watching Gaz and Soap playing rounds of pool, but not really committing to it. Something on their mind, pretty sure knowing what, or who, it could be.

“If I died tomorrow, I’d want it to be those thighs wrapped around my head.” Soap dreamt, leaning on his pole.

“Yeah, no shit. Wasn’t expecting any of that. Reckon I’d begin howling at the moon just to have a bite.” Gaz chuckled.

Eyes snapped up at the duo, and then at each other.

Price laid a hefty pat on Ghosts shoulder, reminding him of his comment earlier.

“Still not what you were expecting, weren’t you lad?”  laughing heartily. Ghost grunted at his comment, as did Horangi and Konig.

“I… must admit… I too, was not expecting such a treat tonight.” Horangi shuttered with each word. Konig nodded vigorously.

Still fantasizing about your worry over him. Fretting over his comfort. He was already fantasizing about your wedding. The life you’ll lead together. Breeding you up with his young, having you cry under his weight, with your legs wrapped tightly around him as he drilled his throbbing member deep into your core. Konig shuttered at the thought.

“I’m going to make her mind” Konig stated out of the blue. Suddenly, all eyes snapped at him. Flashes of competitiveness and want evident on everyone’s face. Now, everyone was vying for your affection. And you didn’t even have an inkling of an idea that any of this was going down.

----

I hope ya’ll liked my story. It’s probably all over the place, and that’s okay. It was something I’ve been needing to get out of my system. Something I can go back to when I’m feeling that little itch.  I may build on this for our individual heroes. IDK.

[chaifootsteps]

One last thing (apologies!), but I just wanted to say, that as someone who loves all things vintage from the 20’s and 30’s, it really bothers me already how inaccurate Alastor’s microphone setup in the leaks seems to be, among other things. Radio setups were in their infancy at the time, and microphones were big, wire-heavy things. If this time period is going to be referenced, they should have at least done some research beyond general ‘visual aesthetics’. So lazy.

I’ve been saying for a while now that pilot Alastor lost all his sense of setting in the final series, and this is further taking the biscuit. No more references like the stock market crash, picture shows or period-appropriate quips? Oh well, at least he had a diddy little moustache in life. I suppose that makes him slightly less generic amongst Viv’s generic humans (she has NEVER been able to draw/design human characters very well).

- Taxidermy Anon 🦌

Oh, 100%. They were these big, heavy things and so cool looking. I'll never understand why Viv didn't give him that much, or why she doesn't seem to hold even the slightest bit of actual love for the period Alastor came from -- why she has so little love that she stripped that pilot trait from him -- I'll never understand.

[p0rk-guts]

He's finally done I think. WOAW! Radio demon time!!!

Okay time for comparison + breakdown rant ^ - ^ another SUPER long one I had a lot to say about this silly guy

ALRIGHT. So. Atp all that can be said has been said about Alastor but I'll gloss over it anyhow. Grossly historically inaccurate hair and clothing. Invisible deer theming. One of the main reasons he's got one of the most clowned on designs in the show is bc he's a pretty good representation of the worst it has to offer. He's absurdly red and has the waspiest waist in town. Also gotta zero in on the coat for a second bc I find it incredibly stupid that he went to that tailor bc of his coat being ripped and then left the shop with the exact same torn coat on oh goddd that felt like a complete joke who wrote this

Also his "redesign" was pointless. He stayed pretty much entirely the same except his colors got pinker and grosser and now he has this?? White trim on his lapels??? Even less 1930's accurate and it only serves to hurt the pallate in my eyes. It's the only spot of white on his entire design, it doesn't appear anywhere else so it throws it all off. And it's so bright. Is it supposed to be a focal point?? His tits????

Anyways onto my guy who I love so very deeply. I'm pretty sure sepia film was outdated by the 1930s but I gave him a palette inspired by it to emphasize how dated and stuck in old ways he is. Added blood red accents bc. Well. Cannibal murderer. Also bc I redid the sin colors so red is wrath and it seems like a fitting sin to pair him with.

After looking into 1930's men's fashion a tiny bit (thanks anon, this video was helpful!) and gave him a double breasted coat but wider and pointier so he looks a little less like just some normal guy and really emphasize how prideful and egotistical he is. "Ooo look at me I'm super big and imposing and powerfulll". I think it's a fun character trait of his. Definitely keeping it.

I liked him wearing gloves bc I feel like he wouldn't like getting his hands directly dirty and would always be covered when committing his murders. Maybe he's a germaphobe even. "I can excuse murder but I draw the line at dried blood on my skin". Also the gloves being white would contrast really well with blood so. Love that

I gave him a long tie to free him from the Vivziepop bow tie uniform and a fedora to add to the 1930's vibe and serve as something that can occasionally obscure his face in shadow. His glasses are also opaque and I imagine his eyes would rarely be shown if ever to make him seem more inhuman and off-putting, disconnecting him from personhood a bit. Wanted to add to that with his smiling mouth never opening and just being a static grin that can only occasionally widen or lessen, his voice cracking out of his "speaker" with fuzzy radio static. Seen multiple ppl use that idea and it always eats

I love Alastor's silly theatric nature (primarily in the pilot) and I'd probably keep it, but I'd add a layer of uncanny-ness to him where when he's not putting on his silly jovial facade, he gives off an unnerving vibe. Trying to appear approachable and charming and pleasant to lure people in before he's revealed to be less than human. Loveee thattt

I love Alastor being a deer. Predator becoming prey (animal) + "prey animal" lulling people into a false sense of security before striking. Love it. We should be CAPITALIZING ON IT❗So I gave him deer like legs, visible deer hooves, and more readable deer ears + the ham radio tower antenna antlers (sorry 4 calling them horns 💀)

Tried to make it a little more obvious that he's a mixed man of color by giving him dark wavy hair and the faintest hint of lip definition Viv uses in her style. I think it works. He's still not dark skinned tho

LASTLY the mic. Also not an original idea as I've seen tons of others turn it into a carbon mic but turned into a pentagram shape and I love the idea a lotttt so I joined the crew.

AND THAT DOES IT!!!! hope u like him as much as I do hehe. Just 1 supplemental doodle this time sorry :/ showing off how his face is probably obscured most of the time. He's. So hard to draw. I'm just bad at men but I'm tryinggggg guys

Alsoooo I've already finished the drawings for Niffty, Angel, and Husk! Once I've finished their breakdowns I'll add em right to the queue, and then I'll make a post with all of the main 6 together :3

[filthgarbage86]

The List: Dominant!Eddie

(this is part of a series that I've been writing but the general idea is that you're trying to figure out which nickname makes Eddie go crazy for and in that attempt, you prove how naive you still are as well)

Part 1

Part 2

CW: daddy kink, daddy!eddie munson, bunny!reader, dom!eddie, submissive!reader, smut smut smut and did I mention smut, trying out different nicknames, dirty talk, fingering, pentration, rough but caring? squirting, etc.

Name 1

You were so nervous to start but you were too excited not to start as soon as the first bell rang and you were going though the hallway at the high school getting to your locker. He was already there, waiting for you like he does everyday. He does a "morning check in" which is seeing how you slept, seeing what you've got going on today, and getting one more kiss before going to his English Class. It was one of the many things that he did that made your heart melt.

"Good morning princess, how my sweet bunny doing?" He immediately has his hands on your waist and is greeting you with those kisses.

"I'm good, sir, and how are you?" "Sir? What am I, a warden?" "Yeah, you're right, not a good match" "What?" "nothing, don't worry about it" Okay, not the reaction you were hoping for. Noted. Moving on. To be fair, you weren't a big fan of it either. Eddie is looking down at you with a quirked eyebrow and then a sudden realization, and his eyes squint down into a knowing grin. You were going to be such trouble for him. Name 2

It was lunch time and you were all sitting together at your table, listening to the freshmen talk at length about some alien in one of the new horror movies you're assuming and how "inaccurate" they are as if they've ever seen them. You soon figure out that they were talking about a part of the campaign that you missed out on while you were talking to a teacher. While they continue talking in length, Eddie is paying close attention to everything they're saying, taking mental notes. He's definitely trying to figure out how to control the game from this naïve information they're giving. He does look like he is in his element. Fully scheming, knowing exactly every move that they could make and how it would impact the players and the game as a whole. He really was the...

"Well it is up to our generous dungeon master, isn't it?" you pipe in, last minute, emphasizing master. You look Eddie directly in the eye as you say it almost as a challenge. Eddie looks at you again, daring you to try that again. It's finally his turn to blush, cough in attempt to hide his face. He focused back on the table, every now and then glancing at you. Okay we're getting closer.

Name 3:

The last one, you didn't even really fully mean to do it. it was like your name all over again, a slip of the tongue and a moment of realization. You were at his trailer, it was after hellfire again but this time, you're both a little high and listening to music.

You're sat on his couch, already curled up into him, and he just looks delectable. Delicious even. He is a little blissed out, head back on the couch back, and nodding along to the song. His haze is a beauty to you and you just want to be so good for him again.

"you're so pretty" "Thank you bunny, I think you're stunning" you whine. you wish it was easy for you, that you were some sexy vixen that he seemed to take you for but the truth is that you don't know how to do this. it makes you a bit sad honestly.

"Where are you baby? What's that pretty head thinking about?" "You" "Oh? In what way?" He turns towards you, propping his head on his hand and propping himself up. "You make sexy look so easy" He lets out a laugh "Sweetheart, I'm flattered but you are just by design" "Not really though" "What on Earth do you mean?" "It's just... you were able to figure out what name I liked so easily. You knew exactly what you were doing and everything you do just makes me go crazy like a puddle-" Oh no, you're rambling. You tend to get like this when you're high and sensitive. It makes it all the more embarrassing and arousing, it's very confusing.

"I just want to be good to you too, I just want to be good for you. I want to be able to say something and it makes you really excited and flips that switch for you but I don't know how to figure it out. I went through like 20 different videos trying to find suggestions-"

"Wait a second, videos? What kind of videos are you watching, princess?"

Shit. You spoke too much.

"You know... videos that could give me ideas of what to call.. you.. in a.. hot, sexy way.."

Eddie is trying so hard not to crack a smile. He is actively fighting down a little laugh, not in a mean way, of course. His sweet, kind, caring, very literal girlfriend had decided to research how to dirty talk in an attempt to please him too. He was just teasing her by saying she needed to try his way. In reality, he had no idea what he was doing either, he was just trying shit. His heart melts at the idea of how much effort you were putting in for his benefit. He really didn't know what he was going to do with you so he just smiled and leaned in giving you a warm, long, deep kiss.

He's holding the side of your face/head and just leaning in ever so slightly. He made you melt in a moments notice. "You mean to tell me..." he starts kissing you gently all around your face and you're blushing from the tenderness of it all. "That you went out of your way to go rent some half-assed, fake-orgasming porn just to try to figure out how to dirty talk to me?" it sounded so silly when he said it like that. You were so embarrassed. Fuck, of course this wouldn't work.

"Bunny, that is the cutest and hottest thing I've ever thought of, you're going to kill me"

"Wh.. What?" You're on the brink of tears, you're so sensitive and so high and you're recognizing so, SO needy.

"There's no right or wrong way to do this as long as we're talking to each other about it. I can teach you things that you don't know yet, don't be embarrassed about it."

"Really?" "Yes baby, of course. It's not an issue or turn off in any way, in fact its literally the opposite. Just let me teach you and let me help you out okay?" You were blushing, you felt hot with want. You were steaming already and all he had done was tell you how much he cared about you. In that moment, it made sense to you. It wasn't the words, or the names, it was feeling and desire. And the way he made you feel was so cared for, so loved, so dominant and strong, and so... daddy.

Eddie breathed in and dropped down to a low whisper "What did you just say?"

The cassette player started to rewind itself, whirling as you started spiraling. You are zoned out enough to where you perk up a big at his acknowledgement and you realized you must have spoken aloud what you were thinking.

And it seemed to have worked, but you weren't sure how yet.

"I didn't mean to say that, Eddie" "No nono no. You said something that definitely was meant for me to hear." "I don't know what I said, I just said it and I'm just a little buzzed babe-"

He straddles you on either side of your cushion, leans in slightly, and gentle grasps onto your throat. He applies a light, barely-there amount of pressure on the sides "Now bunny, you and I both know that's not what you just called me, so I will ask for the final time, what. did. you say?"

Your eyes are glazed over and your breathing goes shallow "um.. I.. I.. said.. daddy.. BUT I don't know why and it was just a thought in my head and-" You're cut off when he squeezes a bit more and your airway is blocked. His strong hand chokes you upwards and he takes another draw from his joint he had been holding. He blows the smoke into your face and smirks "that's about to be the only thought in your head."

He sits right down on you and you immediately feel the bulge that's already formed. This was just from calling him daddy? You were definitely going to play with this later. He starts by motioning you to take off your shirt and you quickly comply. Since it was Friday night and you were in for movies and joints, you didn't have a bra on, meaning Eddie instantly was greeted by your sensitive tits from sudden exposure. You both gasp, you from the temperature change and speed, him from want.

He looks down at you and grabs the right one and holds it all in his hand, while his mouth is latched and sucking on your left tit. You're creening at this, just choking down moans before he moves his hand back onto you throat and you exhale the noises you were trying to hold down

"Don't you dare hold back those sounds, you filthy, dirty, needy bunny. You take that pleasure away from me and I'll leave you here high and dry until you're screaming and begging me to finish you off"

"PLEASE"

"Please what?" He's stood up long enough to slide your sweatpants off and everything off, leaving you completely exposed to him, while he's still completely dressed. You have never felt more naked than in this moment.

"Please daddy"

He growls "good bunny. Now stay still, I need teach you how to say my name properly".

He hoists your legs up and over his shoulders. He places his fingers in front of your mouth, "suck. Make them as wet as you bunny." so you take them into your mouth and start giving him a show. You're sucking, swirling your tongue, and at one point even deepthroating his fingers until he's taking them out of your mouth and into your pussy. The squelching sound that followed had you both moaning again.

"Fuck meeee"

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear that, did you say something? Address me when you're talking to me"

"fuck me pleaaasseee daddy please finger me, get me ready"

He does, he starts moving his fingers at a consistent pace, one that starts to bang out a rhythm, and has you groaning. He starts to do the 'come here' motion to start hitting that gummy part inside you that makes you see stars. Your eyes go glossy.

"yes yes yes fuck me daddy, yes, thank you thank you, wanna cum-"

"don't you fucking dare, you will cum on my cock and when I say, you've got that?"

You're nodding, too fucked out to fully listen to him until he's pulling his fingers out and you whine at the lost of sensation. He stands up to undress himself and boy it's like a show for you. Seeing him with such a radiant energy to him, all his tattoos on display, his hair as frazzled as he was and his cock, oh my gods, it's just as pretty as it always is. It's already leaking and begging to be touched. You sit up a bit, just about to give it some attention when your legs are being hooked around Eddie's waist and he's giving it a few strokes

"Not today princess, we got other things we need to focus on first" He starts sliding into you and inch by inch just groaning as it goes. He leans down to offer more kisses along your jaw and neck line, as well as playing with your nipples to try to relax you. Eventually, once he bottoms out, he all but grinds into you. His crotch is robbing up into your clit, while his cock is deeper than you could ever imagine it. You almost wonder if you're drooling over his cock right now and just as you start to imagine that, he pulls back just enough to where just the tip is there and re-enters you with a bit of force.

He starts a slow, steady, pace that is highlighting how deep he can go. It doesn't take long until your cunt is so wet for him that he's sliding in and out with ease and you're both making sounds that if the neighbors could hear, they would be blushing too.

"Who makes you feel this good? Who's the one that can fuck you this dumb?"

"You daddy! Always you! You!"

"That's right, because you're mine. You are my girl, my little fuck toy, my good, needy, perfect bunny. This is my pussy, you are my girl, and nothing. is going. to change that."

Your head is going all the way back into the cushions, you are so far in the clouds, he's fucked you beyond well, he's fucked you dumb

"My dumb little bunny, my good bunny"

He doesn't show signs of giving up when he's puncturing every thrust with a whispered chant of mine. mine. mine.

You're whining, you're so close and he can feel it

"Just a little longer bunny, you can do it, hold it.. hold it for me, don't you dare cum, I'm almost there."

You're holding on so hard, the knot in your stomach seeming to be climbing more and more and more until you can barely hear when he finally does give you the confirmation "cum for me, bunny, cum all over me. Take it. Take it really good." and you're just a string of daddy daddy daddy daddy until you're both limb from each other. You're both cumming harder than ever before and wetter than ever before when you realize you're squirting all over Eddie's cock and over the couch.

He gasps and chuckles at it before falling forward and turning over to the side so you can curl into his chest and he can slip out of you slowly.

You're both out of breathe, sweaty, and covered in marks and different bodily fluids. You're disgusting and you've never been more starstruck than you were right now.

"Thank you daddy"

"Anytime bunny"

He holds you for a little longer until you both go shower each other off and start trying to figure out how you're going to clean off your couch. So incredibly worth it though.

-----------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Ahhh this is already so long so I'm going to cut it off here but if you want more daddy!Eddie or dominant Eddie just make sure to leave a comment or to ask in my ask box! I'll be looking for writing inspo through those two ways! I hope you liked this!

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} OFC x Harvey Specter {Pt.2}

Helllloooooooo. This is probably the filthiest thing I've written in a long time so I hope you enjoy it as much as I have. As I've been writing this part, I've tortured @rosedpetal to no end with a few teasers and I cannot wait for her reaction. As always, if anyone wants to be tagged in the next part lmk in the comments!!! I love seeing your guys' reactions it makes my day. enjoy loves <3 p.s. this is my birthday gift to you guys (even though it was two days ago it still counts)

Pt. 1 Character Playlist

Word count: 13,156 (holy shit)

Warnings: age gap, smut (18+), degration, exhibitionism, dom/sub vibes, language, anxiety/anxious thoughts, angst, a touch of fluff, more inaccurate lawyer shit

Summary: After Claudia and Harvey win their first case, the week and a half that follows is filled with more of Harvey's 'confidence boosters' and valuable lessons ;). But when they hit a snag in the case, Harvey can't keep the one promise he made to Claudia.

Tagging: @rosedpetal @maxdamax @ashcosmo

~~~~~

When I woke up the morning after, I didn’t know what to think. And I surely didn’t know what to do the next day. Or the day after that. Even a week later, mostly consumed with thoughts of Harvey and how to avoid him, I couldn’t shake the feeling that what we were doing was wrong. 

I mean, in ways it was. For starters, he was a name partner and I was a first year associate. He was at least ten years older than I was. Probably more. What would my parents think? My brothers? 

Hell, what do I think? 

It’s no secret that Harvey is a good looking guy; his sharp jaw, his cunning eyes and fierce smirk that always appeared whenever our eyes would meet. Just because I said I tried to avoid him, doesn’t mean my evasions worked. Nine times out of ten it always fails. Miserably. 

By the time the elevator chimed, the doors whisked open and I immediately looked to his office. Good, he wasn’t there. He always seemed to be waiting for me in his office, just watching. It was like he was stalking his prey. Which, in a way, always sent my skin burning and my mind running. Running right back to his tongue on mine, his hand in my hair… my hand wrapped around-

“Good morning, Claudia,” Donna’s perky voice nearly sent me to the hospital. She was already sitting in my cubicle. When did I end up in the bullpen?

“Jesus, don’t you know how to not give a girl a heart attack?”

She chuckled, “I like to start every day off with a surprise.” In her hand was another blue file. Labeled Friddle vs. Gustoson. It was a corporate case, something about some patent being violated and a stolen technology design.

“What is this for?” 

“Harvey wants to work with you on another case. He has not shut up about how well you did on the last one and knows you’ll bring this home too,” she was grinning. A look that meant trouble.

“Is that… all he’s talked about?” I had to be cautious. If she knew about what happened, I knew she’d tell me. But if she didn’t I certainly didn’t want her to find out. 

“I mean, he raved about that cross examination you gave. And about how nervous you were, but that he’s gonna keep working with you to help build that up because we all know you are the best damn associate this firm has to offer.”

Holy shit she didn’t know. She had no idea. Keep it cool, Claudia, don’t let your face give it all away.

“Oh,” I tried not to sigh in relief. “Yeah I was shitting bricks before the trial. But I did it, I guess.”

“You’re goddamn right you did,” she stood up, taking my hands in hers. “And you’re gonna kick ass again. And, since I know Harvey won’t say it to you, I’m proud of you. Good work, Claudia. Keep it up and Junior partner might be here sooner than you think.”

Donna’s ginger hair swayed back and forth as she waltzed away. That was a perfect way to describe her walk, a dance. I should learn how to walk like that.

I sat, firing up my computer and sorting through the motions and other filing work on my desk. It seemed like this part of the job never ended. We had to single-handedly be the reason twenty percent of the Amazon was gone. 

Other associates around me were gathered at Griffin's desk, chatting about whatever they did over the weekend. I had never, not once, been invited out for drinks or to lunch by any of the associates. Not that I expected to be, I never really made an effort. Not that I wanted to befriend any of these assholes. 

After I won the case, instead of congratulating me on keeping Harvey’s client with the firm and sending the losers running with their tail between their legs, all I got were dirty looks and hushed whispers behind closed doors. 

It made me feel nauseous. What if they knew? What if they found out about Harvey and I’s… whatever it was, and were spreading it through the office? Soon it would reach him. And if Harvey hear rumors then Donna would, and then Louis and Jessica and god knows who else-

“Griffin, Harvey wants to see you in his office,” Donna’s voice rang through the bullpen. Him and his group of dogs were not shy with the looks they gave me. My heart sank in my chest. At the same time I was relieved that it wasn’t me; at least then I wouldn’t have to deal with the hateful, resentful looks. Those were even worse than the ones of triumph. 

I occupied my ever anxious mind by burying my nose in the legal book next to my keyboard, highlighting rapidly to find the errors of some of the other associates' mistakes. Louis always had me check the others' work. He knew– either because Donna vouched for me, or he just saw that I was half competent– that I wouldn’t let careless mistakes slip through. So I always got them.

Lucky me. 

From grammatical errors to punctuation, it was endless. I wasn’t sure who this was, but they clearly have never taken an English class because they used ‘affect’ wrong. It needed to be ‘effect’. Within the same brief, they used ‘to’ instead of ‘too’, and ‘accept’ instead of ‘except’. I wanted to find whoever this was and smack them across the face because this was completely unacceptable for a Harvard graduate. 

I mean, how does one spend well over a hundred thousand dollars and not know the difference between their, there, and they’re? It pisses me off. If Louis ever saw these things before they were edited he’d have a coronary. 

A hand slammed down on my desk. I jumped halfway out of my skin and bit down on the cap of the highlighter, hard enough to have it crack and pinch my tongue. 

“Harvey wanted you instead,” Griffin bit out. His face was twisted and contorted. Obviously pissed. 

Why did he want me? 

I scrambled a little, careful to put all my papers away so we wouldn’t have another incident like I did with my first case. And I made sure to bring it with me this time, basically implanted it in my hand, just to be safe. 

“Mr. Specter, you wanted to see me?” He was looking out the window at the view below. Sometimes it made me lightheaded to think about how high up we were. I’ve never been good with heights. 

“Yes, I did.”

“Can I ask why you called Griffin in first instead of just coming to me?”

Harvey turned around, fussing with his cufflink before sitting down on the corner of his desk. “I just thought you’d like to have the satisfaction of Griffin being turned away.”

I blinked, “Satisfaction? I don’t understand, you did that on purpose?”

“Yeah, I guess I did,” Harvey’s smirk was evil. 

“Why?” I still didn’t get it. Why bring Griffin in and then tell him ‘sorry, I actually meant the first year, not you’. It seemed kind of pointless when he could’ve just… “Oh…”

“Now you understand?”

“You wanted Griffin to know that he is still not the first choice, and that that first choice is me.” “It has been, and it will continue to be. If he can’t see that, then I’ll make him,” Harvey stood, coming to stand in front of me. Almost too close; we were not in the safety of an empty office, I couldn’t let him get too close.

“Why not just come to the bullpen and do it yourself?”

“Because,” he squared his shoulders, “I wanted to knock him down a peg. When I call someone into my office, or have Donna do it, it means I need them for something. I just wanted Griffin to tell you that I needed you for the sole reason of getting under his skin.”

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “Mr. Specter-” “Harvey.” He corrected. 

I swallowed. “Harvey, I appreciate it. Well, in theory I do, but that is besides the point. Ever since we won-”

“You won,” he corrected again. I see what he’s doing. 

“I won,” I huffed, “ever since, I have had a target on my back. People are whispering about me and I don’t need you to escalate the situation. Especially with someone who already hates me.”

Harvey cast his eyes away from mine. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have put unnecessary pressure on your shoulders.”

My lips pressed in a line, arms crossing over my chest. I knew what this would do, what it would look like from outside eyes: that Harvey was doing me a favor. Giving me special treatment. In a way I guess he was, but it was because I earned it. Right? I had earned this? My place by his side as an associate? Not by his side, at his side. I worked with Harvey side-by-side. And you’re goddamn right I earned it. 

Maybe Harvey’s weird Jedi mind tricks are working. As weird as they are. 

“You’ve got that look in your eye,” Harvey spoke softly. 

“What look?” He smiled, “The one where you’re having some internal conflict. Battling it out in your head like Rocky and Apollo, two greats against each other. Claudia, you’re doing great here. And I know you believe it, but you’ve gotta learn to not spiral out of control when something comes up. You can handle it.”

He’s right, Harvey’s always right. Most of the time. 

I followed his eyes to the corner of my mouth. He furrowed his brows, bringing his hand up. His thumb brushed against my skin and I froze. Spine cemented in place. What is he doing? Doesn’t he know how many people could be-

“Just some highlighter,” he reassured. I must’ve missed the cap once or twice. “Have you had a chance to look at the case?”

My brain was half melted. “Sort of, I glanced at it when Donna gave it to me. Seem’s… ballsy.”

“It certainly isn’t gonna be a walk-off,” he sighed. “Which is why I want you to come with me to the meeting with Jay Friddle. He wants to settle with Gustoson.”

“And you don’t want him to?”

“You’re goddamn right I don’t,” Harvey snapped. Not really at me, but at me. I couldn’t help the flinch, and I could see the hurt in his eyes. “Sorry. No, I don’t want him to settle. I think there is some shady shit going on, and I think he’s being framed. I’ve known Jay for five years and I know he didn’t steal their design. Whoever is behind this set him up and made this whole thing look like his fault.”

“When is the meeting?”

“Later today, two-forty.”

“Okay, give me some time to review and do some research on the employees. If he’s being framed, maybe it was an inside job. There could be someone who is from Gustoson’s posing as a loyal employee, or maybe someone cut a deal with them for a pretty penny.”

Harvey gave a firm nod, and I turned to leave. His hand wrapped around my arm and kept me from going. 

“That’s my girl,” he moved a piece of my hair from my forehead. “Always so eager to get to work.”

“Harvey,” I warned. “N-Not here.”

“No one is watching.” “How can you be so sure?” I felt that tingling feeling prick my fingers. The kind of numbness you get when something unexplainable happens and you’re not sure if it’s real. Or when your life flashes before your eyes. 

“Look around?”

I gently turned away from his touch, looking around at the weirdly empty office. All those around were occupied, engaged in conversation and not paying attention. Even Donna was nowhere to be found.   

“I can see that our first… session,” he decided on. His front was pressed close to my back, lips right against the shell of my ear. “Has started to work. You took precedent and responsibility without a second thought. But, you were still wary when I called you in here. I think I need to weed it out of you. Give you something to be in control of.”

A single finger trailed the length of my spine. I could barely breathe. My body, which was not helping me in any way, leaned back into him. 

“How about this, while you’re doing your research, you think of what you want. Of how I can please you, of how you can take control of me. Then whenever we get back, meet me in the file room on the fiftieth floor. How does that sound, sweetheart?”

He was a twisted son of a bitch, that's for sure. 

“Yeah,” I nearly choked on my own tongue when his hand wrapped around the back of my neck. “Yeah I’ll think about it, Harvey.”

“Good girl, Claudia.”

_____

Focus? What was that? How does one simply focus after they’re told they’re gonna have their deepest fantasies lived out in just a few hours? All I could do was think about Harvey between my legs. His fingers wrapped around my neck. 

Of course I knew what I’d ask him to do, but physically saying the words out loud was a whole other thing. That’s what I'm not sure I can do. And I know he’ll make me say it before he’ll even think about giving me what I want.

God damn Harvey Specter. 

At first it had been anxiety that consumed me about him; wondering when he was gonna pop by and request, demanding rather, that I help him with something. But now it was different. I craved him. His mouth on mine, his scent. Harvey always smelled so good. It was calm and didn’t give me a headache like most of them do. Definitely not a cedar or pine or some other woodsy bullshit. Mellow is a great way to put it. 

His hands certainly won’t be mellow when they’re working in and out of- okay Claudia that’s enough. My computer is spinning spinning spinning in circles as I wait for some files to be uploaded. 

When Harvey had me leave his office, not without pressing his obvious need into my ass, I went straight to looking into those employees. About four hours of searching through employee records and cross checking them with ex-employees of Gustosons. Most of them were clean, a few that had a past, but nothing in relation to what we needed. 

That was until I stumbled across one of the hiring managers. His name was Nelson and he seemed like a grade A asshole. He had worked with Gustoson for ten years before leaving and making his way to our client. And he brought over some of the IT department. 

Bingo. 

“Hey Claudia, Harvey wants to know if you’re ready to go for the meeting?” Donna paused by my desk. 

“Yes, I just need to run to the printer and then I will be right in,” I smiled up at her, tucking my file under my arm and grabbing my keys. “Tell him I’ll be right there.”

She hummed and waltzed off. If I had been alone in the bullpen I’d one hundred percent be trying to copy her movements. I mean, how was it possible that she moved so smoothly in a pair of stilettos? I could barely walk in a straight line with flats or a wedge. 

Donna was mind blowing. Donna was Donna. 

By the time I made it to the printer, my papers were there and I just skimmed over them just to make sure I wasn’t taking anyone else's. I had done that before; one of the first weeks I had been working here. I sent my papers to a printer three floors below ours and accidentally grabbed another associate’s. I was mortified, but the girl, Kathrine Bennett? Kaitlyn? Something like that, but she was really nice. She had done the same thing once. I think she got fired and was now at a rival firm. A shame, I wish I got the chance to know her. 

This might seem kind of weird, but I oddly loved the feeling of freshly printed paper. It was always kind of warm and had this very light scent. And it was smooth and easy to flip through. One of those things that brings me a little bit of joy in this hellscape. 

“Hi, sweetheart,” I damn near buckled to the floor. Harvey’s voice was right against the back of my neck, and the presence around me suddenly felt all too warm.

“Jesus Harvey,” I chuckled, trying not to let my fingers tremble. “Maybe don’t sneak up behind me like that?” “I said your name, but you obviously didn’t hear me.”

No. I didn’t. But I did feel his hand slip up the back of my thigh. I went motionless. My breath came out in stutters as he dragged it across my ass, up and around my hip, palm flat against the space right below my belly button. Harvey pulled me back into him, his earlier arousal still there. 

Had it gone away at all? Or did he walk in here just now and get another? No, that couldn’t be. I mean, it wasn’t like I was trying to get a reaction out of him or anything. 

“Harvey I-”

“I locked the door.”

That settled me instantly. I let my hand find the back of his head, letting his lips brush over my neck and shoulder. “Seems like you’re the one who couldn’t wait.”

“Not when you look like that, no. I can’t resist you when you taunt me like this. With a skirt this short, those buttons undone a few more than they had been earlier.”

“I was just hot,” I explained. 

“Oh trust me, I know how hot you are.” Harvey must’ve seen my eye roll at his terrible joke. “You’re right, I couldn’t wait until after our meeting. I needed to have something to hold me over.”

His hands crept around to my chest, fingers ever so gentle as they skimmed over my shirt. As if Harvey’s hands commanded my will, there was nothing I could do to keep from sighing out when he pinched my nipples. It forced me to arch back into him. 

“You’re sensitive, aren’t you? That is very good to know. Where else are you so sensitive? Here?” He kissed right below my ear, then nipped at it. Another spine bending shudder. God damn that laugh of his. “What about here, hmm?” He tugged up the edge of my skirt, toying with the waistband of my underwear, letting it snap back against my skin. “Aww, look at how much you want me to touch you. You’re a writhing mess aren’t you?”

“Harvey,” I pleaded. 

“Harvey what?”

That son of a bitch. I knew he was going to do it and yet I still wasn’t prepared. 

“Harvey, we're gonna be late for the meeting.”

“It’s at three.” 

He turned me around, hand on my neck, so fast I almost went dizzy. He backed me up against the wall and had this devious look on his face. Harvey crushed his mouth to mine and wasted no time sweeping his tongue into my mouth.

I sure as hell wasn’t going to stop him. He was such a good kisser, so dominant and reactive to my endless noises. And he was really good at pulling them from me. 

Harvey lifted under my thighs and pushed my skirt back in the same motion, planting me against the wall, legs wrapped around his waist. It was hard to remember what happened next, but he was quick to pluck open a few more buttons of my shirt and pull my bra down.

If I thought his tongue felt good on mine…

I had to put my own hand over my mouth so I wouldn’t make any noise. Well, I did a shit job, but it wasn’t too loud. 

His mouth was hot on my skin, leaving behind small bruises and wet marks. He bit down, and I hissed, and he grinned before letting up. He slowly set me down, not breaking eye contact as he seamlessly fixed my bra and shirt, reshuffling my skirt back to where it was before. 

“If you liked that, just wait till I get my tongue between those legs of yours. And don’t you worry, sweetheart, I promise I will be far less controlled when I taste you for the first time.”

And then he was gone. He left me there. 

I ran my fingers through my hair, schooled my face into the best neutral one I could and followed him out. Not too close, I didn’t need anyone speculating. 

How Harvey managed to keep his face unreadable was unbeknownst to me. It seemed impossible, I’d need a cold shower and at least seventy-two hours notice to get my head back on. But there he was in the lobby. Totally stoic. Totally unphased. Totally not looking like he had his teeth leaving marks on my chest and making wetness pool between my legs. 

“Oh, there she is,” Donna sighed in relief. “We were starting to think you ran away. Get going you two, you’re gonna be late. Go kick their ass in that depo.”

“Seems like that's all Claudia knows how to do,” Harvey said, giving me a wink when Donna walked off after wishing us good luck.

“You really do not know how to keep it in your pants,” I led the way to the elevator. 

“Why would I want to when I have you to take care of it?”

I just stared blankly at him, his grin spreading wider and wider. God damn Harvey Specter. 

When we slid in the backseat of the car, his hand immediately went to my thigh and it was all I could think about. It was so warm, and so deceptively big. Long fingers brushed over my skin, leaving goosebumps behind.

I had a feeling he was doing all of this on purpose, trying to get me riled up for after this meeting. Since I can’t get away from him, especially right now, all I could do was think about what I wanted most from him. 

To see him smirking between my legs while he made me come undone has got to be at the top of the list. I wonder if he’ll like the way I taste. Shit I haven’t shaved in for-fucking-ever. Is he gonna be disgusted? What if he thinks I’m unhygienic for not taking care of it?

I mean… it hasn’t been that long, a month or two? But I wish I would’ve thought about it. It never occurred to me, even after the endless daydreams, that we’d actually continue all of this. Especially to this much. 

By no means was I a virgin, but I haven’t been in a serious relationship in well over a year, so why did I need to keep things neat down there?  I do not do hookups. Never had, never thought I would. But this technically also wasn’t a hookup? 

What the hell would you even call this? 

My mind was rampant at this point. Going in a billion different directions, all delusional thinking. It was irrational. Not true. And I knew that, but that didn’t stop me from thinking about them. I couldn’t steer my mind away from one in particular: did Harvey even think I was attractive? 

It might seem like a silly question when, about twenty minutes ago, he had me moaning his name in the file room. But it still crossed my mind. Maybe he just thought I was naive and easily manipulatable. That he could have me just because he could, you know? 

It made me feel sick to my stomach. 

Why are you torturing yourself, Claudia? Obviously Harvey finds you attractive. He straight up left bruises on your skin with how eager he was to get at your tits, give yourself a little grace for once.

Why was my inner conscience now sounding like Harvey? I never told myself to ‘give a little grace’. He’s getting in my head. Changing the way I think and talk about myself. Then again I guess that was his whole reason for doing this in the first place-

“Hey pretty girl,” Harvey tapped my leg. “What are you thinking about so hard? You’re white-knuckling your seatbelt.”

Pretty girl pretty girl pretty girl…

I broke out into a huge smile. “Nothing, nothing at all.”

_____

My grin was permanently plastered on my face. We absolutely blew their fucking heads off in that depo. They had no idea what hit them.

“And when you threatened to put Nelson on the stand? Ugh, perfection, the look on their face was priceless. I’ll be replaying it all night and into tomorrow. That shit was awesome,” I couldn’t help the giddy squeal I let out either.

Harvey smiled brightly, a fondness to his face that I hadn’t ever seen before when our eyes met in the elevator on the way back to the firm. 

“Now do you see why I like winning so much?”

I nodded, “Yeah, I can definitely see how it gets addicting. That was… wow. That was amazing. You were amazing, we were amazing.”

“...And?” He pressed. I flushed, I couldn’t fucking help it. 

“And I was… amazing.”

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you. What did you say?”

“You’re one cruel son of a bitch you know that right?” I rolled my eyes. “I was amazing.”

“There you go,” that same fond smile from before showing again. “Now say it again like you actually believe it.”

“I do actually believe it-”

“Say it again.” The smile was gone. 

My throat worked down and I shifted on my feet, clutching my purse in my hands. Just do it and get it over with.

“I did fucking amazing,” I said with a little more umph. It worked, Harvey grinned like the Devil and caught my mouth with his right before the door chimed open. 

“Oh, and before you go and spend all night replaying it over and over, there’s something else I’d like to have you remembering more.”

When I glanced up, I saw that it wasn’t the firm, but the fiftieth floor. The goddamn file room… I had forgotten. How could I have forgotten? I trailed behind him as he led the way, anxiety swirling so violently in my stomach I wasn’t entirely sure that I wasn’t gonna vomit. 

My brain immediately kept trying to think of ways out of it. But my stupid fucking feet kept moving. Why did they keep moving? I didn’t want them to move-

“Claudia, is everything okay? You look… really pale,” Harvey asked once he shut the door and locked it. He looked incredibly concerned, which really only made it worse. “If you don’t want to do this right now we don’t have to.”

“It’s not that,” I shook my head, plastering a smile on my face. Don’t let some god damn hair ruin this, Claudia. You’re gonna be fine. Deep breaths. “Well?”

“Well… what?” He took a step closer, taking my purse from me and setting it on a cabinet. 

“Aren’t you going to ask what I’ve been thinking about? What I’ve been wanting all day?”

“Oh I already know,” he said. “I just want to see if you’re going to tell me or not.”

Touche.

“I don’t need to ask you,” I felt my anxiety melt away, and that surge of power rush in my veins. The same way it did Harvey and I’s first night. “You said you wanted to please me, and if you already know what I want, why aren’t you already between my legs giving it to me?”

His hand on my neck was the only validation he gave me before lifting me up onto a counter, or a cabinet, I didn’t really care.

Wow I can’t believe that actually worked. We’re getting the hang of this, bitch. Keep it up.

Harvey’s tongue tangled with mine, pulling strings of pleas and moans from me. He unbuttoned my shirt yet again, adding to the marks he left earlier. I laid down; thankfully whatever I was on was long enough. Being tall has its perks for sure, but doesn’t necessarily work for these particular scenarios. 

As he bent over me, I let my shoes slide off, wrapping a leg around his hip so my front melted with his. I ground against him, and he wasn’t shy about what it did to him. He pushed back, hand palming at my chest, the other pinning my other thigh to the surface. 

It was so hard to breathe with him over me. But in the most pleasurable way possible. An intoxing sort of suffocation of having his mouth on mine, his chest pressed close, his very obvious arousal doing wonders for my own. 

The second his hands began to push up my skirt, those thoughts came with it. I felt the panic rise in my chest, and the confidence I had built up crumbled to the floor. 

“H-Harvey-”

“Yes, sweetheart?” His voice was sickly sweet and it almost made all those thoughts go away. 

“I umm- I just don’t want you to be- I haven’t… god I am so sorry.”

“You’ve never had someone go down on you?” Harvey asked, eyes wide. “Who the hell have you been with in the past cause they were obviously assholes and I’ll-”

“No no Harvey,” I couldn’t help but laugh a little. “That’s not what I was talking about.”

“Then what, Claudia.”

“Nothing nothing, it’s fine, just go back to-”

“Not until you tell me everything's okay. Just tell me, it’s alright, sweetheart,” his voice was so tender. And his eyes, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say that they were loving in a way. But that was most certainly an irrational thought. 

I blushed, so much felt it go down my neck and light up my chest. 

“Claudia-” “I haven’t shaved,” I blurted out. “I didn’t know this was happening and if I did I would’ve cleaned up for you so if you don’t want to I understand and we can do this another time but I don’t want you to be disappointed and grossed out and-” I actually yelped. He forced my skirt off, pulling off my stockings and tossing them over his shoulder. Then slid my underwear down my legs, not before he made fun of the little pink bow that was on the front. 

He splayed my legs wide, throwing one over his shoulder, pinning the other down. The first touch of his tongue nearly made me tear up. His mouth was so hot. So warm and it felt so good as it curved in and out of me. 

Bliss. Pure, raw, satisfying bliss encased me. I jolted when he flicked over my clit, sending a very much welcome tremble down my spine. I arched up and couldn’t help but grind against his face.

Harveys nails left dents in my skin. I hoped that they would bruise. He was not shy about how good I tasted. He had such a filthy way of describing what I did to him, and he knew that every word would get an even more filthy noise from my chest. 

I could see my wetness smeared on his cheeks; I was a mess since the car on the way to the meeting. Which was well over two hours ago now. It made everything feel that much better. 

Harvey took my leg off his shoulder, pushing it flat to the counter. He then took my chest between his fingers, definitely not careful with how hard he pinched and pulled. My legs quivered, clamping against his head, only for him to force them back down. 

“Keep them there,” he stood, wrapping his palm across my throat. “I’m gonna make you cum on my tongue, but you’re not going to do it until I say, understand?”

“Yes, Harvey.” I thought about calling him sir, but I wasn’t sure what it would do. I really really really wanted to know, but it was more than likely something we should save for the privacy outside of the office because I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep my screams at bay.

I could barely do it right now. 

He brought me in for a possessive kiss before laying me back down and settling between my legs. His fingers scratched and marked the insides of my thighs. I could feel my release building, and how on earth he knew I’ll never know, but every time I got relatively close, he slowed down, sending me right back to the start. It was infuriating, and I almost said something, but then he kept going. 

And kept going and going and going-

“Harvey,” I sighed, breathless and airy. I had to bite on my fingers to keep from making too much noise. Again, I was doing a really shit job. 

“Not yet,” he ordered. “Harvey I can’t…”

“Yes, you can, sweetheart. And you will because you love doing what I tell you, don’t you? You love being on display for me while I have my way with you.” I did. “You don’t even need to say it, I can taste how much you want it. Such a good girl for me, now be good and take it just a little longer and I promise I’ll make it worth it.”

I had no doubt that he would, so I nodded. I bit my lip and nodded. His smirk was devastating as he swiped his thumb through my folds and pressed it to my lips. I sucked urgently, showing him just how good I wanted to be. 

Something changed in his eyes then. It wasn’t just dominance that resonated behind his shaded eyes. It was a look of possession, of ownership. There was definitely a whole other side to Harvey I hadn’t seen yet, but I’d be damned if I didn’t do anything to see it. 

So I placed my foot on his shoulder and pushed until he knelt back on the ground. His grin was wild, purely animalistic and feral in a way. 

Harvey Specter, aka the best damn attorney in the state of New York just knelt to the ground because you told him to. This man is bent to your will, you can make him do anything.

He resumed his mostions, taking the time to mark my thighs even more. I couldn’t think straight anymore. I don’t know how long it's been since we started, but I was quivering, begging for a release. It was right there, so close and so far away at the same time but if I could just get a little more…

“You taste so fucking good, Claudia. I want you to cum on my tongue and don’t you dare be fucking shy with those pretty little noises of yours. I want to know exactly how my tongue is making you feel, just how good you feel. You want to be good, don’t you?”

I nodded rapidly, saying just as much. “Yes, Harvey, yes I want to be good for you.”

“You’re learning so well,” he looked like he was in a daze. “Cum for me, sweetheart. Be my good girl and give me what I want. I know just how much you need it.”

It came so fast it caught me off guard. His fingers… his tongue… it was otherworldly. I haven’t ever felt this euphoric. I kept my noises down, but my breath was out of control, and I had to squeeze my eyes shut and grit my teeth. 

Harvey didn’t let up even with my release, he kept going going going even well after I began to settle back down. I tried to get him to let up; I couldn’t speak so I pushed against his shoulder but he pinned my ankle down.

He wasn’t done with me. 

He licked me dry, gently kissing my skin when he was done. Sweat lined my hair and back, but he was done. And I was limp and thoroughly worked over. 

“I knew you could be good,” he cooed. His hand brushed over my exposed chest, toying with me a little before helping me sit up. He carefully helped dress me again, letting my head come back before kissing me again. Not only did he taste like me, he smelled like it too. 

But his kiss was soft. Softer than it had been before. 

“Feel alright?” he asked, and all I could do was nod. He chuckled, motioning for me to hop down. Harvey’s hand steadied me as he picked up a foot and placed my shoe one, doing the same for the other. This… fizzy feeling bubbled in my chest as I watched him. 

It made me smile uncontrollably. 

“What are you so smiley about?” He asked, welcoming me when I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. 

“Nothing,” I sighed, a content sigh and let my chest rest against his, chin on his shoulder. “I just feel… nice. Really really nice.”

Harvey laughed, “Well I’m glad you feel really really nice. You tasted really really good.”

I swatted at his chest. When we were this close, it was easy to forget all the complex things about our situation: the fact that he was my boss, or how much older he was than me. That he just ate me out like a god in our file room after a huge step in our case. There were so many risks in all of this, but right here none of them seemed that big. A swirling thought in the back of my head wouldn’t let them go, but they could be tamed in this moment.

“Oh, don’t you ever feel embarrassed about not being ‘cleaned up’ for me. I don’t care. Getting to be between your legs is an experience I am beyond privileged to get. You don’t ever have to worry about me being disgusted by you or your body. It’ll never happen, never gonna be possible, Claudia.”

For a long time, I had always thought that Harvey was kind of a dick. They he never gave a shit about anyone other than himself and his reputation. Clearly that wasn’t the case. He, very obviously, cared a whole hell of a lot more than I thought. 

Clearly Harvey cared for me beyond the idea of our sexual desires. I genuinely believe that he wants me to have more confidence in myself. This is just killing two birds with one stone. And I certainly didn’t mind having Harvey Specter between my legs.

“Would you like to-”

“Oh, Harvey what are you- oh, hi Claudia. What are you guys doing in here?” Louis asked. I instantly detached myself from Harvey and took a huge step back. “Is everything alright? Claudia you look really flushed, are you not feeling well? Do you need to go home?”

“No, no Louis I’m alright,” I could feel my skin ignite. “We were just… looking for old files for our case. I just needed a hug. Stress is a bitch.”

How did you manage to pull that outta your ass? 

“Well, you’ve come to the right place. I give the best hugs on earth. Get over here,” Louis insisted. 

“Thank you Louis, but I’m-”

“It’s non negotiable,” he nodded. “Come on, bring it in my dazzling little friend.”

I looked at Harvey who was clearly trying not to burst out in hysterical laughter. I hugged Louis, and it was surprisingly good. Not as good as Harvey, but then again maybe I was just a bit biased. 

“You know my door is always open to you, Claudia,” Louis reassured before he grabbed a box, the one right where I had just been laid out, and practically skipped away. 

When the door shut, I covered my face and Harvey nearly fell over. I wanted the ground to swallow me whole. I wanted to evaporate and never be seen again. There was no way that Louis just… I appreciated his complete obliviousness. More so than ever.

“Okay, that might’ve been more entertaining than sticking it to Gustoson.”

“Not a word, Specter,” I warned. 

“Specter, huh? Well, Martin, you’re lucky I’m in such a good mood because I would really love to go tell Donna about this little interaction.”

My heart sank. “Does she know?”

“No,” my heart began to beat again. “Which baffles me. You are really terrible at wearing your emotions on your face, by the way."

“I don’t understand how you can be so calm, it makes no sense. My brain scrambles and my mouth disconnects from it. I couldn’t believe I managed to spit out something coherent when Louis walked in.”

“It’s cute watching you stutter.”

I blushed.

“That's cute, too.”

“Shut up.” Harvey smiled. “Would you teach me? How to have some sort of a poker face?”

“You want me to?” I nodded, and he looked off behind me, obviously thinking of something. “Okay, stay after everyone has gone home tomorrow, I have an idea.”

“Uh oh, don’t hurt yourself.” He grabbed my arm, laying a firm hand on my ass. I yelped at the smack, eyes going wide.

“Wanna try that again?”

“If we weren’t in an un-sound-proofed office I’d say yes.” That didn’t stop him from doing it again, only this time spinning me around and pushing me down on the counter, fisting my hair and yanking hard enough to bring a tear to my eye. 

“Two strikes, Caudia. Be careful how you read the next pitch.” I really wanted to make an awful sports joke, but I didn’t need to risk someone else walking in and seeing this. There would be no way to explain around it. 

I’d have to move to Antarctica and become a penguin. 

“Okay okay,” I mumbled out. He released me and I turned around. Not without feeling how hard he was. I pulsed between my legs again. Man, did I want to feel that between my legs. I already had a good idea of what he looked like, and god damn did I want it. 

“I’ll be in my office if you need me,” Harvey said, playing with my hair. “Try not to think of me too much, my Claudia.”

My Claudia…

My mouth was dry. “You know I will.”

“Of course you will,” he winked before turning.

I was certainly not going to let him have the last laugh. 

I’d wait a couple hours and then attack. I had a plan, surely one he’d never see coming. It was almost six now and I couldn’t think of anything work related. Just Harvey. I had that sore, sweet burn of an overstimulated release still, and couldn’t feel more content.

But I wasn’t satisfied by any means. 

I waited a little longer before printing out the transcription from our depo to go over. Yes, we had boxed Gustoson in and backed him into a corner, but like Harvey always said, when there was a gun pointed to your head there were seventy-five other ways out. We had to be prepared for every single one. 

When I picked them up, I swung by Donna’s desk.

“Hey hot shot,” she cheered. “Heard about the depo, you really are one hell of a lawyer, aren’t you?”

“Well, what can I say? I’m just awesome at what I do,” I beamed. “Do you know where Harvey went? He wanted to go over it so we can get a clear idea of what their next move will be. I think they’re all out of cards to deal, but you never know.”

“Harvey really is rubbing off on you,” she looked me head to toe. Hide the face, hide the face. “Did something happen between you two? You’re like- glowing.”

Shit shit shit shit shit-

“No- well, no not really.”

“What do you mean ‘not really’?” She joined me on the other side of her desk. “Claudia, did he yell at you cause if he did I can-”

“No no, Donna. Everythings fine, more than fine actually. I am just… starting to feel more comfortable around him, is all. I don’t feel so nervous to be around him.”

“That’s fantastic,” Donna smiled, bringing me in for a hug. I prayed she didn’t feel my sweat back. “Good for you, Claudia. I knew it would happen sooner or later. I know he can be a hardass, but there is a method to his madness.”

“You don’t say,” she had no fucking idea. This was great. “Let me find him, I’ll be back before you leave to let you know how the depo really went.”

She just raised her eyebrows before I walked away.

Time for some real fun.

I pushed open the bathroom door, someone on their way out giving me a weird look. Harvey was at the sink washing his hands when he saw me.

“Claudia, what are you-”

I looked under the stalls and thankfully no one was in here. I locked the door. As I planted myself in front of him, I spoke so coolly it didn’t even sound like my voice. “You didn’t think I could leave you high and dry, did you? What kind of good girl would I be if I didn’t return the favor.”

“Claudia, sweetheart you don’t have to-”

“I want to. And I’m going to.”

I slipped to my knees, my eyes never leaving his. Even as I popped open the button of his trousers and untucked his shirt. They fell to his ankles and I let his briefs join them. He was hard and waiting for me so I didn’t waste time to build the confidence.

It was already there. 

Harvey braced against the sink when my tongue ran up the backside of his shaft, slowly starting to take him into my mouth. I worked it all the way in, earning a deep, guttural noise from him. 

“Jesus fucking… Claudia…”

I felt a rush of pride run through me at the thought of him not even being able to speak. It only motivated me that much more. 

I worked up and down, pausing every now and then to focus on the tip, ever so gently letting my teeth graze for a little extra pleasure. I wasn’t sure if he was going to like it, but he shivered. And when I did it again, he did it again. He was under my control.

I couldn’t help the spit that collected and fell down my chin, or the tears that fell from my eyes and smeared some of my mascara. I knew he didn’t mind because when he looked down, he swore and bucked his hips.

“God you look so hot stuffed full of my cock,” he put his hand on my head and pushed me all the way down. “And you know how to take it all the way, I didn’t even have to teach you. Such a good fucking girl, Claudia. If your throat feels this good I can’t fucking wait to be inside that pretty pink pussy of yours. I know it’ll be a tight fit but you’ll take it like such a good girl won’t you?”

I nodded, humming around him as he began to fuck my mouth. 

“Yeah, you love this, don’t you? Being full of my cock. I just know you were dying to taste it, huh? Go on then, open really fucking wide for me.”

His hips were brutal, pushing more tears out with every thrust. Harvey let the praises and moans fall from his mouth like the sweetest candy. I had to brace my hands on his thighs so he wouldn’t break my nose. That’s how hard he was going. 

“Gonna cum, sweetheart. You're gonna take it all down, aren’t you? Just wait until I get you on your hands and knees so I can fill you up and have you begging for it.”

I couldn’t help the whine that came out. Granted it was broken up by his thrusts, but that somehow made it dirtier. 

Harvey released, stilling his hips, pushing deep until his body lay flush with my face. He pulled out, cum coating his skin. I was more than happy to clean it off for him. 

“Awww look at you, Claudia. Being such a sweet girl and cleaning me up. God you are such a funcking slut for me. Show me.”

I opened my mouth and stuck out my tongue, presenting it to him. Again, that dark, feral look was in his eyes. He grabbed me by my neck and pulled me to my feet. His eyes never left my tongue.

“Swallow.”

I did. Harvey’s laugh was cruel. His thumb was pressed right up against my esophagus, and I knew he felt it go down.

“I am going to fucking ruin you for anyone else, Claudia. I am going to take you apart and put you back together over and over again until all you’ll know is my name and how to breathe.”

I clenched my legs together, already feeling my desire come back. He let go and I bent to put him back together this time. When I put the button back through the slit, I made sure to keep my eyes on him. I gave a pat to his chest before turning for the door.

Before I left, I looked over my shoulder, swiping my thumb across the corner of my mouth to get a remaining drop of him. I dragged it over my tongue, giving my own devastating wink before leaving him alone.

_____

There were plenty of ways I could’ve spent the next twenty-four hours. Were any of them productive? Absolutely not. No matter how much water or tea I drank, I could still taste him on my tongue, and it only made me that much more distracted every time I remembered it.

I loved it when he told me how good I felt. 

Not only was Harvey incredibly good at being a lawyer, he was very diligent with his body. So responsive to every touch and noise I made. He made doing all of this feel not so intimidating.

Whether I wanted to admit it or not, I did feel like it was working. never in a million years would I have the balls to initiate an intimate moment with him, let alone any type of moment.

His madness was working. A little too well.

What he had planned next was beyond me. Apparently he went out for the day, according to Donna, who also told me he cleared the rest of his schedule for the night and asked if I knew anything about it. I felt bad lying to her, but I didn’t really know what else to do. She couldn’t know yet, I needed to wait. 

But when she came to check on me, eyes a little bloodshot from staring at this damn computer all day, she wished me good luck tonight and headed home. She hoped that Harvey wouldn’t run me into the ground.

I knew we weren’t going to get any work done. 

And I was so excited. 

I waited. And waited. And waited for Harvey to come find me. Maybe he was still out? I had no idea. I was about to call him when he walked into the bullpen.

“Oh, hey I was just looking for you.”

“Good,” the corners of his mouth curled up. “Come on, let's go to my office.”

I was more than eager to follow. When I got there, there was a bag on the corner of his desk, a note pad and a pen. “What’s all this?” “You asked me to help you with keeping your face unfazed. Well, I’m gonna help you. You’re going to sit in my lap while I’m inside you and we’re going to sit on this conference call with one of my clients in California. You’re gonna learn how to keep your voice steady while taking notes for me or everyone's gonna know what we’re doing. Are we clear?”

My whole world was tilted on its axes. This could go wrong on so many levels. My mouth voided any saliva and I couldn't process this idea.

“Harvey is this really a good idea when-” “You always do this, Claudia. We do something, you question it, and then you realize afterwards that I was right. When are you going to start trusting my ideas and just do what I say?”

I just rolled my eyes, “Fine. You’re right, and I do trust you."

“Of course I am, I’m Harvey Specter.” I really wanted to smack him, but he moved away before I could. He opened the bag and pulled out three boxes of condoms. “I wasn’t sure which kind you preferred so I grabbed a few options.”

That was, weirdly enough, one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me. I know, it seems kind of lame, but it was incredibly thoughtful. I read the back of the boxes, settling on one and putting the others back in the bag. 

Everything’s gonna be fine, Claudia. He’s right, he knows what he’s doing. We’ve got this, just breathe and everything is gonna go great… holy shit you’re about to fuck Harvey. This is really about to fucking happen holy fucking fuck-

His presence in front of me took my rushing thoughts away. I smiled up at him before kissing him a few times. No turning back now. 

We didn’t dare fully undress, but I slipped down my bottoms and hiked up my skirt, Harvey doing more or less the same. Harvey brought my back to his front and gently swept my hair over my shoulders to help soothe me. I was shaking a little. 

“Relax, sweetheart. You’re gonna feel so good, I promise you.” Chills. All over my body. 

I eased down onto him, with his help, and settled into his lap. It burned and stretched so well. It took a good few steady breaths to adjust and let myself loosen up. 

“Good girl, Claudia,” he praised, that sickly sweet tone back once again. “That’s it, just lean back and let me do the rest.”

Harvey trailed his hands over my thighs, pulling my knees open so they fell over his own. I sighed out when his finger dragged around where we connected and up up up to where I was still so sensitive. I jolted, and he turned his face into my neck.

“Ready?” He asked, and I nodded. He dialed a number on the phone and it rang a few times before a voice came through the other line. “Brian Fergison, how is the West Coast treating you?” “Oh it’s a dream, Harvey. An absolute dream, you gotta come out here one of these days,” Brian said enthusiastically. “I have my insurance broker, CEO, accountant and consultant on here as well. Thomas, Daniel, Michael and Henry.”

A collection of hello’s and hey’s came through. “Nice to speak with you gentlemen. I have my personal associate, Claudia with me here. She’s been helping me out on a few cases recently and I thought I’d show her more of the big leagues.”

“It’s a pleasure to have you, Claudia. If you’re Harvey’s personal associate, you must be one hell of a lawyer,” Brian boasted and I could feel my flush. 

“Lets just say that I can give one hell of a nasty cross examination,” I said, voice calm and collected despite Harvey's fingers between my legs. “Most first years don’t get an opportunity like this so I appreciate it.”

“Wow, Harvey, where do you keep finding all these kick ass young stars?” “Harvard,” I answered for him, earning an array of laughs through the phone. I looked over at Harvey who had a devious grin plastered on his face. He thrusted up particularly hard, almost making me gasp out loud.

So that's how it's going to be?

I clenched hard, making him flinch. He dug in his nails as a warning. I listened.

“Alright, let’s get to the business at hand. I was hoping we could all discuss what is at stake for my company with the new rules and regulations…”

The conversation faded out for me. I half paid attention to what they were saying, but focused mostly on Harvey. And these stupid notes he had me taking. It was a steady pace, not fast at all, leisurely. He hit deep inside me, and it was incredibly difficult to not make any noise. I did my best to keep my face neutral, even though we weren’t on camera or anything. 

His hands crept up my shirt and played with my chest, making it even harder. I throbbed around him, hissing slightly. His grip shifted my hips, rocking me back and forth to grind even deeper. 

My wetness stuck to him and made noises I thought only we could hear.

“Is someone eating or something? What is that noise?” Brian asked. I went frozen, but Harvey pinched my nipple again as if to say ‘go on, answer him’.

“Sorry, Brian,” I responded, voice still together. “Harvey is a bit of a hardass and hasn’t let me have a break all day to eat. I’ll put us on mute and we can chime in if need be.”

“All good, and make sure Harvey hears that he needs to take it easy on you over there. Give that poor girl some time to breathe, man.”

“Don’t worry, Brian, she can handle that and a whole lot more.” Even I could hear the grin in Harvey's voice. I reached around me and hit the mute button, then sat up so abruptly I nearly smacked into the table. He placed one hand on the center of my back, holding me there, the other fisting my hair and pulling. Hard.

“You’re asking for it, aren’t you?” “And if I am?” I said, my breath stilling in my chest. 

“This is not how this call is going to go. It’s forty minutes long, so I hope you’re ready for that. Be careful how you speak about me because I can make this really fun for me and miserable for you.”

“I thought this was your idea in the first place,” I wasn’t going to be bullied by him. I wasn’t afraid when we were like this. “Bring it on.”

We were up so fast and I was chest down on the desk. Bent over me, cock still shoved all the way in, he whispered, “I am gonna take that phone off of mute, and when I do, you’re gonna say you’re going to the bathroom and I am gonna fuck those bratty words right out of your head. If you make one fucking sound I will make you cum. And if you make a sound when you do, I’ll do it again and again until you learn.”

My toes barely touched the floor. Harvey hit the button and nodded for me to speak. I waited a moment until there was a lull in the conversation. “Hey, I’ll be right back. Don’t rip on Harvey without me.”

“You got it, Claudia, I’ll save all his embarrassing college stories for the end.” I was going to get it for sure after that comment.

Harvey started a more than brutal pace. Thankfully I was adjusted to him so it wasn’t as bad, but with the force of his thrusts… gods help me. 

I bit down on my lip, fingers clenching the edge of the desk as he rammed into me. It was so hard to keep from crying out, to keep my knees from hitting the desk. 

“Harvey, I was wondering if there was anything I needed to do to get my patent’s turned over? Or if there is something extra I need to get to make them usable in California?” I knew Harvey spoke, but I didn’t understand. I was far too focused on him pulsing in and out and in and out of me to care. It felt so fucking good. With one particularly hard push of his hips, the whole desk shifted and I clamped a hand over my mouth to keep from screaming. 

Then my hand was gone. His hand was big enough to wrap around both of my wrists and force them behind my back. 

God fucking dammit-

“Is Claudia back? I had a question for her,” Henry, the consultant, asked. Shit shit shit shit shit.

“Yeah she just walked back in,” Harvey said, dragging me back into his lap as he sat, fingers immediately playing with my exposed chest. 

“Hey, what did you want to ask?” Still ice cold. 

“I was just wondering what your thoughts were on the idea of handling a personal case for me. My lawyer just retired and obviously you seem more than qualified, even if you are a first year associate.”

I was genuinely shocked. “Oh, sure. I’ll get your number and email at the end and I’ll make sure to reach out about the details.”

“Sounds good,” he said, switching to ask Harvey something. A brush of his finger between my legs told me I did a good job. 

Soon enough, we were back on mute while Brian took a moment to get his kids settled for bed. Harvey was quick to start talking.

“Look at you, taking me so good. I wasn’t sure how well I’d fit but you’re just such a good girl, Claudia. I bet you love this, being split open while others are just one moan away from knowing what I’m doing to you.”

“I can’t take it much longer,” my voice was trembling. 

“You’re gonna take it as long as I say. We’re over halfway, my pretty little toy. You can stay seated on my dick for a little while, can’t you?” I nodded, my brains almost gone. “See, still such a desire to please me. I think you’ve earned a little reward, no?”

His fingers circled around my clit, sending waves of pleasure and hurt through my body. I let the noises built up in my chest slip through, trying to shift away from his touch when it became too much. 

“I will put you back on that desk and tie your hands behind your back if you don’t stop moving. Sit here, be still, and take my cock like you should. Do not make me tell you again.”

I shut my mouth quickly, occupying my hands in his hair. With one hand between my legs, the other on my throat, his lips trailed over my neck. I did my absolute best not to move, but it wasn’t easy. I writhed and whined and begged for him to let me reach my high. 

“You wanna cum on my cock? Is that what you want? Go on then, make a mess all over me.”

It wasn’t even pleasurable at this point. It hurt in the most amazing way possible, but I was to the point of numbness. He quickly hit the unmute button and I bit my lip so hard I knew it’d bruise. He drew lazy circles through my slick and I was on the verge of tears.

Guess he wasn’t kidding when he said he’d break me down and build me back up over and over again.

Harvey’s hand came and clamped over my mouth when I shuddered around him. His whole body tensed and clung to me, forcing me to still even though I wanted to fall onto the floor with the strength of my release. 

Stars danced the backs of my eyelids. My voice would be rubbed raw tomorrow for sure. I’d be more sore than I had ever been. 

My chest rose and fell quickly as I came down from my high, legs and arms tingling. I don’t think I made any noise, if I did, they’d surely know and we’d be in some deep shit. But when I looked at the phone, they were still carrying on with their conversation. 

“I’m thinking of having a company party. And Harvey I’d be thrilled if you could make it out, even bring Claudia if you want. I’m sure Henry would love to meet her, as would I,” Brian spoke.

“That sounds good, Brian,” Harvey’s voice was thick, very clearly too turned on for his own good. 

“I’d be honored to come out,” I said, voice wavering just a tad. “When are you thinking of having it?”

“Not until we get everything squared away on the legal side of things. Then I’ll worry about all that stuff,” he gave a big sigh. “Man there is a lot that comes with running a business.”

We all have a laugh, Harvey starting up my hips again. I didn’t even feel it, couldn’t rather. He was content using me to get off and I was content to let him. I stayed quiet, using my legs to push up and down, rock back and forth, anything I could think of to make him miserable. 

His fingers were locked onto my sides, thrusting up into my down strokes. The noise was minimal, but still sounded around us. Hopefully just us. 

I felt his teeth lock onto the back of my shoulder and yelped. 

“You alright, Claudia?” Brian asked. 

Yeah it’s just Harvey fucking bit me, I almost said. “Yup, just stabbed myself with my pen.” Nice cover, idiot. 

Harvey let up then, kissing over the indentations. His hips stuttered, and his breath was hot and fast on the back of my neck. I leaned forward and hit the mute button. 

“You close?” I got a grumbled string of pleas. “Come on Harvey, you know how much you’ve been waiting for this, don’t be shy now. I want it, sir-”

The words weren’t even out of my mouth before I was gagging on his fingers. I struggled to breathe, eyes watering with the force of it. He fucked up into me so hard I had to brace on the desk and the chair. A noise tore from his chest, so deep it sent goosebumps scattering across my body. His hips were flush with mine, his hands forcing my hips flat, taking taking taking all of him at once. 

“Say it again, Claudia,” he commanded. 

“S-Sir?” I hadn’t even realized I said it. Now or never, I guess.

“Fuck,” he swore. Harvey pulled me off his lap and stood, dragging me over to the window. Don’t look down don’t look down- “Want it, sweetheart? You want my cum, huh?”

“Yes sir,” my voice was barely there. I gasped when he lifted me into the air, pressing my back to the window. Holy shit I hope this fucking glass doesn’t break.

Harvey damn near made me see stars when his hand wrapped around my throat. Between that and his tongue on mine, his cock shoved all the way in, so deep it was painful, I was in the most glorious twilight state I’ve ever been. 

He had his way with me, brutal and erotic and of pure primal instinct. It was clear he didn’t give a shit about if he was hurting me or not. He wanted one thing. And I was gonna let him have it. 

The release caught us both off guard, nearly sending us both to the ground. I clawed up his back and his fingers tightened on my neck. His hips were flush with mine again, jerking in and out at random convulsions. His forehead was damp against my chest.

When he eased me down, my legs were shaking so bad I couldn’t stand. I tripped over my feet trying to sit down. Harvey was far steadier, handing me a bottle of water from a drawer in his desk. While I sipped, he tucked himself back into his pants, and we gave our final goodbyes and email exchanges to Brian’s team. 

It wasn’t until a few minutes after the call ended that we looked at each other. 

“You uhh… you alright?” He asked. 

I was a little stunned, did he just stutter? “Oh, yeah Harvey I’m fine. Are you?”

“Yeah yeah I’m good.”

“Good.”

Silence. I tapped my thumbs on the plastic bottle, combing my fingers through my hair. Our eyes met again and we both broke out into wild smiles. 

“So 'sir' really does it for you?”

“I wasn’t exactly expecting to hear you say that,” he looked mildly embarrassed. “It just- it’s a power move, for sure.”

“I’ll have to keep that in mind.” He shrugged, “I am far less forgiving when I am in that state of mine. I am not nice and don’t necessarily give a-”

“Harvey,” I stopped him, standing. I took his outstretched hand and let his hands land back on my hips. “If it was too much, I would’ve told you. And besides, I’ve been dying to see that side of you ever since you first mentioned it.”

“You have?”

I nodded, humming and nodding my head. “Just like you I have my secrets. One of those is my undying desire to please. I’d find a way to get it one way or another.”

His smile was devastating. He swooped down to pick me up in his arms and gently spun me around. “God Claudia you have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear someone say that.”

My heart clenched and my stomach dropped at the same time. I didn’t want to read too far into his words but how could I not when he said things like that and placed gentle kisses along my collar bone? 

We grabbed our belongings and headed for the elevator, it was well past eleven now and we both wanted to go home. Harvey insisted he drop me off, and I wasn’t in the position to say no. my feet were killing me, and so was pretty much every other inch of my body. 

The car was warm despite the bitter February wind. The city lights were as bright as ever as we raced down the street, just a couple of city blocks, to my apartment. 

It took every bit of my willpower to not ask him to stay over. That wasn’t part of the deal, I kept telling myself. He wasn’t obligated to comfort me afterwards. And I wasn’t obligated to do the same. 

“Have a good night, Claudia,” Harvey said, brushing his thumb across my cheek.

It was really fucking hard to not melt into him.

“Good night, Harvey.”

______

The next day I didn’t see Harvey at all. When I asked Donna where he was she said he had to take a trip upstate to see his family. I didn’t want to pry, it certainly wasn’t my business, and if he wanted to tell me he would. 

But I got concerned when I didn’t see him the rest of the week. Well, I saw him, just could never catch him at the right time. He stops by my cubicle for two seconds, dumps a stack of papers and says ‘have these organized and on my desk ready to go for tomorrow’, and then disappears. 

What in the hell was going on? “Donna, I really need to talk to Harvey,” I stood my ground. He was in his office, sitting at his desk, the desk that held more than a few intimate memories.

“Claudia, now is really not a good time,” she insisted. I rolled my eyes, huffing and turning away. I’ll catch him before he leaves.

I didn’t catch him before he left. Or when he showed up the next day, or the next. A goddamn week went by and I could barely get two words in. I was getting a little pissed off. And of course my mind had been running rampant with anxious thoughts: he got what he wanted, now he didn’t need you anymore; he was just using you to get the job done and he’ll move on to the next associate. And in big bold letters: Harvey fucking used you.

I could feel the tears welling in my eyes, pricking my nose and burning my throat. 

I can’t take this torture any longer. I need to find him. Now.

I marched right past Donna and into Harvey’s office. I did have our complete case file in hand as an excuse, but I wasn’t really planning on talking about the case. My brain was on fucking fire at this point, I didn’t know what I was going to say, if anything at all, or if I was just going to break down like a pathetic little girl who couldn’t take it.

“Claudia, now is really not a good-” “It never seems to be a good time, Harvey,” I cut him off, watching his mouth snap shut at my harsh tone. “I have been trying to get this to you for four days now, you gonna take the five minutes it takes to go over it or do I need to FedEx it to your apartment so you can get to it in two to three business days?”

His eyes were wide. He stood up from his desk and took the file, but set it on the table. 

“Harvey just take one fucking look at it-”

“I’m sorry,” he said, voice calm and steady.

“You’re sorry? For what, ignoring me the past week?”

“Claudia I wasn’t-”

“Are you sure because it seems like ever since after that conference call you’ve been actively avoiding me like a fucking disease. I-I-I don’t understand what I did, Harvey. Was I not good enough for you? Did I make too much noise or-or did I say something wrong when you dropped me off?”

“No, Claudia I have just been-” “Using me? Leveraging me to climb the corporate ladder?”

“How dare you accuse me of that bullshit,” Harvey bit out, a venom laced in his words. “I can’t believe this, after everything I’ve been trying to help you with, you’re gonna look me in the eyes and say I’m using you?”

“It sure seems like it to me because I can’t think of another goddamn reason why you would go through all that trouble just to practically ghost me.”

“I have been trying to tell you that I’m not avoiding you, but you cannot take down your alligator filled moat for two fucking seconds to let me explain what the hell I’ve been doing.” 

“What the fuck is going on in here?” Donna shouted over both of us. I snapped towards her, flushing a deep shade of red. 

“Nothing, Donna,” Harvey pressed his lips in a flat line. “We don’t need you to intervene-” “Well it sure as hell sounds like you do,” she came and stood at my side. “What’s going on?” “I was just trying to tell Claudia that I haven’t been avoiding her, that I have been busy being a goddamn name partner and trying to keep this firm above water. In fact, I’ve wanted nothing more than to just put everything else on pause and actually get to sit down for half an hour and discuss what we’re gonna do in court because I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention, Claudia, but we are in some deep shit with this Gustoson case.”

“Which is why I have been doing everything in my power to hunt you down and give you that file.”

All eyes landed on it, it’s tan envelope. Harvey flipped it open and scanned the document.

He ripped it up and threw it in the trash. 

I stopped moving, I stopped breathing. 

“Are you out of your goddamn mind, Claudia?” 

“Harvey,” Donna was baffled at his tone. 

“You seriously want to file a motion to dismiss? In what way would that benefit us? Cause it seems like all you want to do is throw this case away and let Gustoson win.”

“No, I want to get their lawyer off the case so that way we can go after him, because he’s in on it and-” “We have no proof of that.” I wanted to rip out my fucking hair. “I was working on getting it.”

“Claudia, we don’t have time for you to just stumble upon evidence and hope it works,” Harvey let his hands slap against his thighs, eyebrows knitted together. “I needed an idea last night, and since you clearly can’t get the job done, maybe it’s you who should be thrown off the case because you clearly have no idea what the hell it is that you’re doing.”

There was nothing I could do to keep the tears from burning tracks in my skin. He promised… Harvey promised…

“Okay, let’s just take this down a few notches,” Donna stood between us.

“No,” Harvey shook his head. “Claudia, you’re going to learn real fast that just because you’re my associate, that doesn’t mean you get your ass kissed. I am not gonna sit here and baby you on every case. If you can’t come up with a different idea by the end of the day, I’m gonna put Griffin on this case and you’ll never get the chance to work with me ever again. I don’t lose, and I’m sure as hell not gonna risk that just because you don’t know how to do your goddamn job.”

All I could do was stare at him. Stare and stare and stare. 

My hands didn’t even shake. My breath didn’t pick up, and my tears didn’t fall. I was utterly tranquill, like a certain part of me was expecting this to happen, and here it was. Served to me on a silver platter. 

I hiccuped a sob. It hit me out of nowhere. I couldn’t do anything to control it. 

“You promised…” I wasn’t even sure I actually spoke the words, I may have just mouthed them, be he understood. I watched him snap out of his heated daze and take a jarring step back. But I wasn't going to sit around and wait for him to give a fake apology.

His intentions, from the very beginning, were blindingly clear. Harvey didn’t want to work with me, he didn’t think I was a good lawyer, he just wanted to get in my pants. 

I was disgusted by him, my stomach churned and I knew I was going to vomit. 

“Claudia-” Harvey gasped, like had been punched in the stomach; I wished it was Donna who socked him.

“You’ve done enough,” she said, and placed her hands on my shoulders. She steered me out of his office and my vision blurred. 

I was one sorry son of a bitch to believe that Harvey actually gave a shit about me. Why would I ever fucking believe that? I should’ve seen it coming. I should’ve known it from the start. A man like him does not fall for a woman like me, they only pretend to when they need something. 

“Claudia I am so sorry about-” “I wanna go home.”

She was quiet for a long moment. “I’ll tell Louis you had something come up.”

I just nodded, grabbing my purse and jacket, heading for the elevator. 

He promised… he promised… he promised…

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 51 Lateposting

Greetings, dear void. It's time to delve into Samura's character this chapter!

This is some Buddhist crack cocaine. No wonder he's at the temple!

His given name is Seiichi (清市)- not very unusual in of itself. 清 (sei) means pure, clear, or clean and has tons of related implications like invigorating, peaceful, vibrant, being free from impurity, so on and so forth. 市 (ichi) means city/market could be chosen for abundance, prosperity, or influence. [pure city]... Hm. Kind of amusing that both his family and given names include kanji for locations. I don't know enough about Japanese naming conventions to say if this is weird or not though.

It's funny to watch him struggle with his sincere beliefs that conflict with his worldly desires (like porn mags and cigarettes), but it also adds a very compelling layer to his character that instantly rocketed him near the top of the "Please Don't Die" list. The gag at the start of the chapter is designed to hint at his deeper character conflict in an amusing way before demonstrating the seriousness of it. I'll say more about that later.

Also, I'm going to keel over and die if we keep getting spoiled with so many names, Hokazono-sensei! Tobimune 飛宗 is our fifth enchanted blade. 飛 (tobi) means fly/leap for freedom, ambition, and being able to stand up for one's beliefs. 宗 (mune) means ancestor or respect (for elders/tradition/religious teachings). It can be chosen to symbolize respect for legacy, admiration for those who have come before, and an expression of the family's faith. Hmm, where have I seen this kanji before...? Anyway, I choose to believe that the name is [flying ancestor] because of the hilarious mental imagery it invokes. This is almost certainly inaccurate though, so believe at your own risk.

Unexpected Connections

No escaping yaoibachi even during a kick-ass fight chapter! I'm not a fan of the mentor/mentee ship dynamic, but that sort of thing is hugely popular in certain spaces over in Japan. Expect a sharp rise in SaUru stocks going forward (the JP tag is 座漆, for those who want to know).

Uruha and Samura use the venerable art of 居合術 (iaijutsu), a staple of many an action series featuring samurai-esque characters fighting with katana. I was hype for Samura cleaning house and boy was I not disappointed! He's so freakin' cool, man!

Where did he learn to succ like that, though...?

I'm a huge fan of the decision to give the bearers ties to each other outside of being acknowledged by Kunishige as well. It adds depth to the story and characters without requiring Chihiro's presence, making the world feel more natural. I'm excited to see what relationships we can compare to Samura and Uruha's instructor-student dynamic!

It's a bit funny that both of them use the same technique, have the same connection to Kunishige, and possess similar war hero status but have vastly different outcomes. Samura seems to have reached some kind of inner peace with himself- just like a samurai near the end of his story (oh no, death flags). On the other hand, Uruha is more like a ronin in the way he mourns the death of his master (Kunishige) and remains listless until he can fight again for Chihiro's sake. How much more has Samura experienced in life to be where he's at vs. Uruha? Official age reveals when?!

And this...! Chihiro lore tidbits!

So Chihiro DID get to go out in the world away from home, at least a little bit.

This probably took place shortly before Kunishige was murdered since Samura was still at his own home instead of the temple (Chihiro was 14~15 during the attack -> is 18 when the story starts 38 months later). And now we know how he learned to use a sword- Samura showed him a few things! I mean Kunishige probably did too since he demonstrated to Chihiro by slicing through as single bamboo shoot in Ch. 1, but Samura had a few things to teach as well. And he still has at least one more lesson for Chihiro before this arc finishes.

Samura, Chihiro, Life, and Death

Very interesting how Samura accepts that he's "going to hell" for killing obvious bad guys we're not supposed to feel sorry for. Contrast that with Chihiro, who believes he's justified in pursuing vengeance and killing "scum" who hurt others along the way. Both of these mindsets are valid and sympathetic! But it's notable to me that the adults in this manga are the ones who have more reservations and moral hangups about risking and taking lives compared to their younger companions. Usually it's the cool older adults telling the kids to keep an open mind and do what must be done, you know? At least in the shounen series I read. And they still do it here! I haven't forgotten the gut-punch flashbacks of Kunishige being a goof while telling Chihiro to "keep a cool head". It's just that the messaging from the adult cast of Kagurabachi is quite somber compared to how it usually goes in shounen. There's something heavy weighing on all of them that compels them to interact with the younger characters like they do. Ch. 1

Kunishige's reaction to Shiba's praise of him as a war hero.

Ch.8

Why wouldn't you know about being able to change before it's too late, Shiba? What's your story?

Ch. 29

A war veteran's outlook versus a young colleague's idealism.

A lot of these adults -especially Kunishige, Shiba, Uruha, and Samura- also refuse to be seen as heroes and pass the buck on to someone else. Their exact reasons are still hidden from us, but it's not hard to see that life has tempered them and given them nuanced takes on the significance of death. So their advice and wisdom come across as something somber and painfully realized.

Then you've got young characters like Chihiro and Hiyuki who have a strong sense of justice and don't mind killing "scum". We've been cheering Chihiro as he murders random mobs in cold blood since chapter 1 because we know he's only killing "bad guys", in fact. They're quick to judge and condemn and to their credit, pretty much everyone who's gone down to them directly has been framed as irredeemable (or at least deserving by association). Yakuza who kill and torture innocent townspeople, amoral mobsters that participate in slave auctions, mooks who want to kill Chihiro on sight for a bounty- it's never been in doubt that Chihiro is morally justified for killing the people he does.

But what is the weight of a life? Can Chihiro truly call himself a good guy after staining his hands with so much blood? Is he correct to condemn and snuff out so many evildoers? Samura brought up these questions. And there aren't any easy answers here- hopefully.

I think we can all agree that anime protag speeches containing pearls of wisdom like "killing [super evil villain] would make me just as bad as him" are eye-rolling in most superficial contexts. Many people find Chihiro appealing because he is the antithesis of this trope. But I believe the lackluster reasoning that comes across on-screen has a deeper logic behind it that often isn't built up or conveyed well.

In Buddhism, every single life is precious- no matter what. All of us are here for a purpose and it is not our place to judge how others spend their time. Instead, we should be pursuing our own peace and helping others along the path. We can choose to find or create value from even the most awful situations. We can and should choose to help someone turn away from causing harm to become a companion on the long road to enlightenment. So choosing to end a life instead is robbing someone of their essential right to exist. Killing a killer is a terrible act even if it saves other lives. So while it doesn't stop Samura from taking action, he acknowledges that he won't fare well in whatever judgement comes after death; he's no more worthy of living than the assassins he's killing. But he understands that his life is essential to the stability of the nation, so he fights to save himself despite believing what he's doing is wrong. Samura is cast in complex shades of grey compared to Chihiro's stark black vengeance born of grief.

If you thought direct references to Buddhist concepts were leaving WSJ with JJK ending this week, you were WRONG. I'm not gonna try to figure out what the flowers are right now but I might make a separate post if it eats away at me enough.

I think this is the burden that lays on most of the adults we've met. Killing might be morally justified in many cases, but it shouldn't be the first course of action, much less celebrated. Hence why Shiba tries to reform Madoka and the living Tou sibliings, why Samura has his bit here, and why Kunishige seems to hate being called a hero for creating weapons of mass destruction.

Death is part of the burdensome legacy that Chihiro's carrying- Kunishige was very clear about that in Chapter 1, so it's not a surprise that it might come up. I hope if it's explored we get a lot of nuanced takes, just like how familial duty was looked at in the Rakuzaichi arc.

There's another comparison I want to touch on...

Despite all of his resolve and intention to see the mission through, Chihiro isn't built for murder; if he can sympathize with the opponent, he instantly loses the will to fight. We've known this since Hakuri pulled Chihiro along with him to kill Kyora in the the Rakuzaichi arc. And Chihiro's still hesitating thanks to his compassionate heart: Uruha had to remind him to focus on the fight after they saw the gruesome display at the station. And we are reminded again this chapter in a very pointed fashion through Samura, but this time with a bit of potential foreshadowing disguised as a flashback:

I have no doubts that Samura will be the one to get Chihiro to stop wavering in the face of overwhelming cruelty this arc. Despite his sincerely held Buddhist beliefs, he accepts his role and what it means to be a Bearer. He sucks in the toxin of his worldly desires and commits seeing his job through. That will be the most important lesson he can teach. Hopefully not through death or betrayal, but... well, we've got a while to go so buckle up and settle in for the ride.

Hakuri, Samura, Uruha, and "Worth"

Sorry for the pseudo-philosophical rant there. Best boy is here again!

Cute hair clip and radiation therapy face marking, bro. Interesting smell lore too- apparently Samura can only recognize "old friends".

Hakuri's relegated to being an exposition device while on forced bed rest, but at least he still gets to do something in the narrative (I will yap about this guy no matter how small his appearances are).

In line with my borderline headcanon ramble above, I think "worth of self" might be examined this arc through Hakuri. I don't want to beat a dead horse over Hakuri's issues each post, so basically: knowing one's own worth and acting accordingly is A Thing now. Hakuri, Uruha, and Samura all have different takes on the concept that will hopefully get developed.

Hakuri: thinks he needs to be useful to have "worth" (re: is completely unable to make an accurate self-assessment). Throws himself in harm's way with no self-preservation instincts evident despite being the key to Chihiro's plan working.

Uruha: despondent without someone to fight for until he meets Chihiro. Correctly assesses his own worth and refuses to take Hiruhiko's bait and rush headlong into danger.

Samura: at peace with fighting and killing even though he considers it to be a wrongful act. Knows his own worth and fights to preserve himself.

They sorta read as being in different stages of a self-actualization journey, don't they? Hakuri is at the start, Uruha's somewhere in the middle, and Samura's near the end. Maybe I'm just bonkers and making connections I shouldn't- wouldn't be the first time!

Crackpot Conspiracy Theory Time

This is just a silly series of observations. I have lots of tinfoil to make hats with if anyone wants to join me though!

市 (ichi) from Seiichi is the same kanji that was used in Rakuzaichi (楽座市). 100% coincidence, yes. But what if I point out that 座 (za) is ALSO the sa in Samura (座村)? It's not like there's a dearth of "sa" or "ichi" kanji to choose from to make a person's name, you know. Especially if it lets you avoid an overlap of concepts -like location-related kanji- being used in both the family and given names. What's up with that?

2. And then there's Tobimune. 宗 (mune) is the same character used in Soya's name, just with it's more typical reading. I pointed out a bit ago that the so reading of 宗 added to the oddities of Worst Big Bro's name- he's got some weird stuff going on (as does Hakuri).

3. We're not actually sure if Soya is dead. I want him to be rotting in hell for all eternity, but he could be alive and resting up somewhere offscreen. It's actually a semi-popular theory in the fandom since he didn't explode or become fertilizer at the end of the previous arc.

4. Samura's already raised a few traitor flags by being one of the handful of people to know about Chihiro and Kunishige's circumstances, and he found out by accident in a somewhat suspicious way.

Basically, I'm saying that this could be a hint that Samura will be tied to Soya's comeback. Possibly even be the traitor himself! I know, I know, I'm a genius. I accept kudos in the form of likes, cheese platters, and licensed professional mental health services.

Thank you if you made it this far into my delusional ramblings, kind void. Let's hope we see some Chihiro action next week and that no one raises any more death flags! Except for Hiruhiko. He can die any time, thanks.

[anglercrit]

Antis can't accept Viv's take on the Sins daring to be inaccurate to demonology. No, they need to be child of the real Sins because creative interpretation needs to die.

oh wow, my first hate mail! I know I should be ignoring this, but screw it, lemme explain my thoughts:

I don’t mind that Viv is trying new things with her sins. Beelzebub and Belphegor being female? Beelzebub drawing from bees instead of flies? The circus theme (at least in theory)? Those are all cool! I actually kinda like her Lucifer leaning onto the apple motif, that’s fun and something you don’t see a lot!

My issue is that she’s inconsistent on what’s accurate and what isn’t, as well as a lot of her original designs being explained poorly. Yknow how I said I like the circus theme in theory? Beelzebub being an animal tamer is BARELY an aspect of her character, and I’m still not sure WHAT Asmodeus is supposed to be- a magician maybe? Lucifer and Mammon get their theme across fine, but those two are baffling and I assume it’s gonna get worse with how she’d described Leviathan as “a surfer dude”.

A lot of the motifs she picks also just don’t really make sense- why is Beelzebub a fox? Why is Mammon a spider? Who knows! We have some ideas, but none of them are concrete for now and her explanations tend to be weak when we do get them.

[bruisedboys]

congrats on 4k mal!!!! so so deserved ily!!!! for HONEYBODY can i request a meet cute moment with mechanic!eddie <3

omg hi anna babe! I’m so sorry this took me so long, it’s also really short and kind of awful but. I tried <33

super embarrassing but I don’t know a thing about cars so I’m sorry if this is vague or inaccurate

mechanic!eddie munson x gn!reader

The walk back to your car from the telephone box feels dehumanising. You’re embarrassed, you’re frustrated, you’re hot. Your car refuses to start and you’ve had to call the local mechanics to come and pick up you and your useless hunk of metal with wheels. As if you weren’t embarrassed enough, stuck on the side of the road while cars whiz past you in both directions.

By the time you get back to your car you’re sweating and irritated. The guy on the phone said his coworker would be here in five minutes so you get back in the drivers seat in search of some shade. It’s warm and sticky inside the car but at least the sun isn’t taunting you anymore.

A few minutes later a truck pulls up next to you. A younger guy with a head full of wild curls and tattoos all up the arm that’s draped over the car door sticks his head out.

“You’re Y/N?”

You nod. “Yeah.”

“‘Kay.” He flashes you a grin, pearly whites blinding in the bright sun. “Lemme park and I’ll get to checking out your car.”

You get out of your car while he parks in front of you and then you watch him get out of his truck. He’s in a graphic tank with grease stains all over it and dark grey coveralls tied around his waist. His curly, wild hair is tied back in a messy knot at the back of his head. He’s wearing more jewellery than you are, a big chunky necklace and a cool spiky earring, a dangly silver earring on the other ear. He’s really quite handsome, and you don’t have time to process this information before he’s standing right in front of you.

“Hey,” he says, toolbox clanging where it dangles from his hand. He smiles at you warmly. “I’m Eddie. Wayne sent me to come check your car.”

Wayne, the guy you’d talked to on the phone. You nod and try not to stare at Eddie’s arm as he sets the toolbox on the hood of your car. It’s covered top to bottom in black tattoos, inky designs stretched across his pale skin. You swallow.

“Uh— yeah. Yeah, it stopped and then wouldn’t start,” you explain, a bit uselessly but it’s hard to think when your mechanic is so wildly attractive. “I tried everything, but it’s kind of a piece of junk so I’m not surprised.”

Eddie grins at you lopsidedly. “Right. Well, let me have a look at it and see if I can figure out the problem. If not, we’ll tow it back to the shop. Sound okay?”

You nod. Anything would sound okay coming out of his mouth, you think.

Eddie pops the hood of your car while you stand to the side, unsure what to do. You could stand here and watch him, his arms as he turns knobs and screws, tattoos stretched taut across his bicep muscles. But you’re melting in the hot sun, and you think you might pass out from reasons other than the sun if you watch him any longer.

Eddie must sense your awkwardness. Or at least, see the sweat collecting on your forehead.

“Do you want to go sit in my truck?” He asks you, emerging from under the hood sweaty and grinning. “Y’can put the air conditioning on, it’s hot as balls out here.”

“Oh, um. No, that’s okay. I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?” Eddie looks at you from under his lashes, concerned. “You look like you’re melting, sweetheart.”

Sweetheart. Your heart does a funny jump to your throat that makes it difficult to speak. To breathe, even. You find yourself being led over to the truck by Eddie, his hand on your wrist, thumb at your pulse point. He opens the passenger door and lets you climb in, then rounds to the driver’s side. There’s a miniature red guitar keyring dangling from the rear view mirror. Eddie sticks his keys in the ignition and hits the aircon button, humming to himself all the while.

Immediately you’re hit with a cool wave of air and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“Feels good, right?” Eddie asks, grinning.

It’s impossible to miss the implication, even though you know he didn’t mean it to be there at all. Your chest goes tight and his ears go bright red. It’s kind of adorable.

“I mean the aircon,” he says quickly. “It’s nice. I just got it installed last weekend, Wayne made me pay for it myself, but, um …” He trails off, ears a hot red and his cheeks dusted pink. He meets your eyes and grimaces. “You don’t care. I’ll be out here, if you need anything.”

He gives you an awkward two fingered salute and then disappears. You hear him groan to himself as he walks away.

You laugh to yourself, totally charmed. For once, you’re glad your car is such a nuisance.

[regretavator-redraws]

Hello !!

I’m Indigo, and as obvious I’ll be doing regretavator screenshot redraws :3

I will be taking requests for anyone who wants to send their own screenshots or just their Roblox avatar.

And if anyone wants, I’ll do other Roblox games as well by request!! Orrrrr just any game in general :DD But anything done by me without request will most likely be Regretavator.

Oh ! And I’ll also just take doodle requests in general or pictures of characters that simply aren’t screenshots.

Just keep in reminder I may not know the lore behind the character and therefore the design may be a little inaccurate if it’s a random game.

And no, I will not do anything suggestive or NSFW related.

Here’s some examples of my style below !!

And here’s what I can do digitally :3

[irisintheafterglow]

More Than It Seams (Chapter 4)

summary: you're a hero costume tech working for one of the biggest fashion companies in quirk society, and the days until the most important fashion event of the year are dwindling fast. if you weren't stressed enough, a certain half-and-half hero keeps appearing with rips in his suit. (pro!todoroki x reader)

word count: 2.8k

cw/tags: swearing, mentions of needles, probably inaccurate fashion design vocabulary, strangers to lovers, no specified pronouns for reader, mentions of food/eating, mention of character death/disappearance, descriptions of wounds and blood, grief with happy ending

note: second to last chapter let's gooooo !!! in theory this could be considered the "last chapter," but don't you wanna know how the ball goes??? and maybe shoto and reader have their first kiss ;). thank you for all the support you've given this series!!

likes/reblogs/feedback are appreciated :)

New Voicemail Message [11:32 A.M]

“Hey! Just checking in; I just finished the whole flame side and I’m about to start the shading for the ice side. If you’re able, I’d love for you to come see it and maybe I can buy you lunch this time. No pressure, just let me know. Alright, bye!” 

New Voicemail Message [5:36 P.M] 

“Hi, hi, hi. I picked up Soba takeout for dinner if you’re free. I have both of our usuals, and I can drop them at your agency too if you’re busy. Oh, also, the lady behind the counter was so confused that it was me by myself; you should’ve seen her face. Anyway, just wanna make sure you’re doing okay. Bye!” 

New Voicemail Message [8:24 P.M] 

“Hey Shoto, it’s me, again. I’m sorry for spamming you with voicemails and shit. I just, honestly? I’m kinda worried, haha. I know it’s dumb. Like, I know you can handle yourself and everything, but part of me still wants to make sure you’re good, you know? Just, uh, let me know. If–when you’re home. I miss your stupid voice. Okay, bye.” 

New Voicemail Message [11:56 P.M] 

“Hey. I’m aware that I keep bothering you. If I did something to make you upset, I’m really sorry…I’m about to go to bed, but I’ll see you tomorrow? Obviously, you can’t see it, but uh, I’m sticking my thumb up, haha. Call me when you can, please.”

[2] Missed Calls: Big D(esigner)🧵👑💖 

New Messages: Big D(esigner)🧵👑💖 

12:00 A.M hey  12:00 A.M idk if you’re awake 12:00 A.M but if you are 12:01 A.M please check the news 

The incessant buzzing phone in your hand woke you from your position on the couch. You don’t remember falling asleep, but you assume you passed out after eating a late dinner, waiting for Shoto to call. His food was in the fridge, untouched, while yours was only half-eaten, plastic bowls and utensils messily scattered across your coffee table. The notifications at the top of your phone made your heart drop into your stomach, and you prayed that the thought hiding in the back of your mind wasn’t true. 

You stood as the TV clicked on, only for your legs to give out beneath you as the reporter detailed where he was last seen, what he was wearing, possible suspects, and the statement from his manager. There was no substance in the public statement, only reassurances that efforts are being made to find him. You shut down the TV after they got into the part of the statement that sounded like a fucking eulogy, talking about how he was a loyal friend, devoted hero, and embodiment of a good person. You didn’t need to be told that. You’d seen it firsthand for the past two weeks. Anger, confusion, worry, and grief came in waves, crashing against each other as you curled into yourself. Your eyes welled to alleviate the burn after staring at the screen, your forehead throbbing from the flashing reds and whites of the “BREAKING NEWS” title screen. Your lungs and throat felt empty, consciousness detached from the body. 

No sobs rang out in the darkness of your apartment that night, and it terrified you how silent you were. There was no crying, no convulsing, no thrown objects across the room to create dents in the walls. It was just…silence. You couldn’t tell if you’d slept or not, hours passing as you stared wide-eyed at the ceiling after dragging yourself back onto the couch. It was an effort to breathe, to force yourself to inhale and exhale like it was opening and closing your fists. 

As sunlight permeated through the lightly swinging shades, your phone alarm went off. You stared at it, the musical sound seeming to be coming from underwater. The notifications at the top of your phone once you finally turned it off were like reading in a dream, with letters blurring and rearranging until you didn’t know what the original message was. Hey, thinking about you, they said. We understand if you can’t make it in today, they promised. Hello, you were one of the people last seen with Todoroki Shoto. Our news outlet would like to interview you. Fingers gripping the phone so hard you wanted to snap it, you slammed it onto the coffee table. Flashes of white-hot rage took over your body, directed at no one in particular. You pulled a pillow into your chest, fighting back the impulse to scream, scream, scream until either your voice or your lungs give out. 

“Hey.” It was your roommate, and she held her cat in her arms like a newborn baby. Your empty eyes stared back at them. “I won’t ask if you’re doing okay because that’s a bullshit question. I just wanted to tell you that I’m here for you if you need anything. Just call me, yeah?” You barely nod your assent, and her gentle fingers brush away the tears that had broken through your resolve. “I know it’s hard, and I know you’re grieving,” she said as she rose from the crouch she took to be eye-level with you. She takes your hand, giving it a squeeze. “But I also know that you’re one of the strongest people I know. We both know it’s Friday, and we both know those assholes in the commission aren’t going to postpone the one event that brings them money.” She doesn’t say it, but you know what she means. You need to get up and finish your pieces. “Do your best, okay?” 

Just do your best. 

It’s what you repeated to yourself as you struggled from the couch to your bedroom, then to the bathroom, then finally out the door and through the gate in your office. Your other designer, the one who had told you to check the news, runs over from his station. Shaking your head decisively before he could speak, you brush past him with an understanding hand on his shoulder. Your aching throat didn’t have the voice to give one last round of encouragement to your staff, but they looked to you anyway as you took your spot at the front of the room. 

“Just do your best,” you said before turning to the embroidery thread shelves and picking out the most vibrant shades of blue and light purple you could find. The rest of the office worked with a fervor you’d never seen before, and you gave them a sad smile whenever they’d glance up to check on you. All the other heroes’ ball looks were finalized, ready to be handed off to their stylists who would do the final dressing and accessorizing. Seven mannequins lined up in front of a window: Cellophane’s intricately beaded suit, Momo’s sweeping velvet ball gown, Deku’s sleek three-piece, Red Riot’s fiery matching set, Pinky’s princess-like mermaid dress, and Bakugo’s sheer-paneled, explosive applique-covered denim jacket. 

Everyone’s looks were finished, except one. His tailored leather pants were complete as well as the simple white button-up, and the silver pocket chain rested around the headless neck of the mannequin. All that was left to do was finish the design covering the back of the coat, which you worked on tirelessly far past when your staff had left the building. It should have been a day of celebration with champagne, balloons, and cake to commemorate another successful Hero Ball; but, 11:30 and 5:00 passed with no trace of him, and you couldn’t find it in your mind to participate in festivities. Whispered goodbyes and “see you tomorrow” floated around you, and it took more energy than it should have to smile and nod. 

Time ran away from you again, and the coat was finished at midnight on the dot, embellished with small buckles, two rows of buttons, shoulder pads, pockets, and the stunning ice and flame embroidery on the back panel. It truly was the greatest piece you had imagined and created, your quirk allowing the thread to almost act like paint as you added subtle nuance to the two opposing cranes. The fire crane rose from the bottom corner of one of the front panels, forming a circle with the ice crane that descended from the shoulder pad of the opposite front panel. Draping the finished piece on the mannequin and attaching the pocket chain for good measure, you stepped back with your hands on your hips to admire your work. He was gonna love it, when he saw it. If he saw it, the pessimistic demon in your mind whispered. With a deep breath that you didn’t know you needed, you turned to pack your stuff and head home. 

And that’s when something large slammed into M’s office window. 

The thud startled you, the dull noise of something hitting the glass bouncing off the empty cavern of the room. Your fingers wrapped around a pair of scissors as you approached the half-open door, cautiously guiding it open and squinting at the distorted figure behind the dark glass. Your eyes widened when you realized the object was huge, the size of at least two very tall people. One hand tightly gripping the scissors, the other slowly slid into your pocket to call the police when you heard a voice call from the other side. 

“Needle! Needle…wait, what? Needle, uh, sprouting from…Needle sprouting from thumb? Jesus, Todoroki, who would ever say such a thing–” You threw the window open, sending it flying upward as you took in the people set precariously on the ledge. You recognized one as Deku, the number one hero who sometimes visited your office to implement support tech into his costume. His gloved hand grabbed the edge of the window, easing him and the person he was carrying into M’s office and collapsing onto the couch. Deku quickly stood, closing the window and scanning the surroundings for threats. Your hand unconsciously rose to brush the matted red hair from the other person’s face, and the oxygen left your lungs as you zeroed in on the scar barely visible around the blood splattered on the person’s left eye.

Shoto. 

His body was in tatters, with scrapes and cuts and punctures covering his body like some zombie Halloween. The white of his hair was covered in so much blood that his entire head was red. His suit had burnt off on his fire side, and his ice side was nearly blue from discoloration. Your body moved on its own when you took in the most significant wound, a large gash cutting diagonally across his abdomen. Mind empty except for the battered man on M’s couch, you shoved your hands into the fabric scraps box and brought them back to Deku, who pressed them against Shoto’s gash to stop the bleeding. Fingers pressed under his chin, you felt a faint heartbeat and could see his chest rising and falling in shallow breaths. He was dying, and you needed to do something to stop the blood loss. 

“I tried to get him to go to a hospital, but he said it wasn’t safe,” Deku said to you, eyes clouded with concern. “He was barely able to tell me your building’s address before he passed out. I trust his judgment, but I really need you to know that, if Todoroki doesn’t get stitches, he will die. Do you have some way of stitching this up?” The fabric in his hands was soaked a dark red and the realization of what Shoto wanted you to do hit you like a train. 

He wanted you to give him stitches. 

You’d never tried your quirk on any actual humans, only textiles. Your parents had suggested becoming a medic because of your quirk, but the idea of manipulating something to enter a human body was an idea that you couldn’t stomach. There were others with more efficient quirks who could do that, but none of them were with you now. An idea dawned on you, and you reminded yourself to applaud your planning skills later. 

“Deku?”

“Yeah?”

“I need the sutures from your toolbelt.” His eyes widened in understanding, and he frantically pushed aside objects in his belt to find the roll of medical-grade nylon you’d placed there as a part of upgrading his first-aid kit. “Sorry, I added…more items,” he muttered apologetically, finally handing you the unused spool and the box containing the sterilized needle. Like clockwork, you threaded the needle just as you had millions of times before. Averting your gaze as Shoto groaned in pain from Deku cleaning the wound with alcohol pads that you’d also put in his belt, your hand soon hovered over Shoto’s wound in preparation to close it. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, ignoring the image of the sewing machine and instead opting for a simple knot at select intervals. Fighting down the bile in your throat as the needle pinched Shoto’s skin together, you shakily guided the thread through the skin layers and tied it into a tight knot. You felt Deku’s eyes watch you in amazement as you worked, delicately patching Shoto back together as you had with his suit the first day he’d walked through your elevator doors. Slowly but steadily, you moved your hand and the thread across the wound, sewing it shut like you’d attached his trenchcoat panels. They were, by no means, medical-grade stitches, but you believed they got the job done as the color slowly returned to Shoto’s face. When you finished stitching the large wound, you helped Deku wrap the lower half of his chest and his arms with gauze. With more scraps of fabric, you gently scrubbed off the blood and dirt, combing through his tangled hair with wet fingers. 

“Thank you, Deku,” you said quietly to him as you threw used fabric scraps into a trash bag. “For bringing Shoto to me. I was really worried.” 

“Of course,” he replied, smiling warmly. “I only wish that I’d met Todoroki’s partner under different circumstances.”

“Partner? I mean, yeah, we’re business partners, but–”

“Oh, no. I’m so sorry, then. I, uh, meant romantically.” Your face began to burn from Deku’s assumption. “He just talked about you a lot, you know. How much he liked being around you, how you seemed to know exactly what he was thinking. He told me about all your soba dates and how he didn’t want them to be considered dates since he wants to take you somewhere much nicer when you’re done with all the ball stuff, but I still think they’re dates.” Holy shit, Deku was rambling. “I teased him about it since I don’t think he’s ever been in love before, but–” 

“Midoriya, I implore you to stop talking.” You both gasped, turning to look at a barely-conscious Shoto, who was trying to sit up from the couch. 

“Todoroki, you’re awake! Wait, no, no–you can’t sit up yet,” Deku stutters out as he rushes over to carefully push Shoto’s shoulders back down, moving the hair from his forehead as his head falls back against the armrest. You feel out of your body again as you kneel next to him, fingers brushing his cheek in relief. “I’ll uh, give you two some space,” Deku declares as he scrambles to pick up the trash bags and exit M’s office, leaving you alone with Shoto. 

His gentle eyes find yours. “Hey, pretty.”

“Hi, handsome,” you whisper, reciprocating the weak smile he gives you as he takes in your exhausted face. “What the hell were you thinking, coming here? You needed a hospital. It wasn’t safe risking your life to come here, Sho,” the shortened version of his name slips from your mouth before you could stop it, but the even softer look he gives you sends any regret or embarrassment running. “What would you have done if I wasn’t in the office?”

“I just knew you would be.” 

“That’s a terrible plan.” 

“But it worked out.”

“That it did.” You press your lips to his forehead and relish in the way his eyes shut in contentment. “I finished your coat.”

“You did?” 

“I did, but you can’t see it right now. If you lift a single finger off that couch, I’m going to reopen your stitches.” He lets out a pained laugh, wincing at the pain shooting across his chest. A thoughtful look crosses his face again, and you adore the way you could see him working things out in his mind. What those things are, you’d never know, but his pure intellect was enough to admire. 

“Do you still plan on attending the ball tomorrow?”

“Not if you’re still hurt.”

“In that case, I am no longer hurt.” He smirks at you, with an immature, boyish, attractive smile. “And I still haven’t…chosen a plus one.” 

You feel your heart cease racing in your chest. “Yeah? And who’s the lucky winner?” Your voice shakes slightly as you attempt to relieve the tension with a joke. 

He looks at you again with that expression that makes you want to kiss him. 

“It’s you. It’s always been you.” 

As you finally drift off to sleep slumped against the couch, your face close enough to his to feel him breathe, you know in your mind that it’d always been him, too.

[1] Missed Call - Midoriya Izuku

New Voicemail Message [2:04 A.M]

"Hi Yaomomo! Hope you're doing well. I need a favor..."