#the wife comes first
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manicventures · 16 days ago
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Sevika + dramatic metal arm reveals
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sneakingpasta · 1 month ago
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11 NEW DANMEI LICENSES AND A FINALE!!!! WE FEAST IN 2025
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lrndvs · 3 months ago
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If you're a motorcyclist in LA and you heard barking, that was me, sorry, it will happen again.
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stemmmm · 21 days ago
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if you havent read my wife's gf fanfic WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!
(no sound)
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boarwinds · 2 months ago
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Princess locked away in a tower with the demon she's supposed to be kept from #OshamirWeek Day Four: Free Day
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paperglader · 4 months ago
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they really put alicent in bridgerton blue on the reunion and genuinely expected me to think that she didn’t in fact march all the way to dragonstone to get wifed up? bfr
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#I am only a girl living in a society#I make connections#she looks so pretty in blue though I want more#also you’re telling me that rhaenyra saw her walk in all cute looking to not completely crumble at the sight of her?#like my girl got all dolled up for you do something#rhaenyra IS a puppy dog when it comes to those bambi eyes shut up#Alicent was like you think you want her? I’m the love of your life you moron#and rhaenyra is like I KNOW#like she’s been trying to get the other woman to realize that very thing for the last 15+ years#and alicent’s all heartbroken like oh so you’re taking her to wife#and rhaenyra is like nO? WHAT?? all dumb and speechless cause jealous alicent was definitely not on her bingo card this year#whilst also having her own mental breakdown#because how on earth is she meant to explain this to her councel#or jace for that matter#that sure was goint to be a fun future conversation to have with her heir#but also Alicent just strutted into the room and started acting like a scorned wife?#which left rhaenyra feeling like the asshole parent who stopped paying for child support after the divorce#but also she never wanted a divorce in the first place?? and alicent doesn’t seem to get this?#like she’s already figuring out how to most efficiently empty daemon’s chambers for the woman to move in permanently#but alicent’s still yapping off about not having a place in court anymore and fleeing across the sea#and rhaenyra can’t help the bitter taste in her mouth as she states how that ship came in a little too late for them and it is messyyyy#hotd leaks#house of the dragon leaks#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#rhaenicent#alicent hightower#rhaenyra targaryen#bridgerton
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loserifer · 7 months ago
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i survived another week under capitalism's thumb. w me. anyway, here's some Tension >:)
Page 5/?
First | Previous | Next
reblogs are appreciated!!! 🕺🕺🕺
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in-this-essay-i-wont · 7 months ago
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Look. I know I am overthinking everything ever. I know. But there’s such a big fucking difference between howdys business and how it intertwines with his character and Eddie’s, because like LOOK BRO
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The SMALL ASS TEXT THAT HAS EDDIES NAME???? COMPARED TO THE LARGE EMPHASIS THAT HOWDY HAS FOR HIS BUSINESS AND HIMSLEF???
Like Eddie’s name is so small and insignificant to the post office compared to howdys sign, like Eddie can barely find a place for himself and who he actually is outside of his function as a mailman- where as howdys name is the first thing for his sign! It’s huge! Like it’s a part of who he is, it’s a part of his love for jokes and laughter- compared to Eddie where it seems more of an all consuming way for him to lose himself in what he can function as, and not who he actually is. Which, ya know, kinda explains the whole breakdown before the party for home warming, because taking away his function leaves him with the little part of himself that he always seems too busy to express.
Chat this is devastating I need to be put down
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sillygoofyqueer · 1 month ago
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Hooooold now!!!! you can't just drop in shen qingqiu attic-wifing crow!yuan and then say JUST KIDDING, i want to hear more!!!
i looove the idea of that shen qingqiu is super suspicious and waiting for the other shoe to drop, for shen yuan to finally reveal the knife hidden in his pocket and stab them in the back, only to find out shen yuan is just... actually Silly & Goofy Like That, and not a threat at all, and also shen yuan isn't scared of him, not even a little bit, and not in the way of most stronger cultivators who shove it in his face that they're more powerful than him, but in the way that shen yuan casually relaxes around him and looks at all his shinies without apprehension.
he doesn't care at all about the rumors either (he's done his own research, and why care about things that aren't true?), but he isn't hanging off his robes either like yue qingyuan, making him the only True Neutral presence around him. so well. attic-wifing it is<3
ATTIC WIFE ATTIC WIFE ATTIC WIFE- Listen, I'm always partial to Shen Qingqiu showing feelings and care by just...shoving people into his home and not letting them leave. I think SQQ would be slow about it, casually making Shen Yuan stay longer - "it's far too dark and even an imbecile wouldn't be stupid enough to try and venture out THIS late" - making him share a bed/sleep where the head disciple would usually stay. He would analyse how SY makes mini/temporary nests and then make the comfiest nest possible for the demon. Then he would start distracting SY with shiny things, leaving them out and carelessly saying that SY can keep them - "does it look like it matches my home? No, go put it in your room." (SY doesn't know when it started being referred to as HIS room, but he lets it happen anyway). SQQ is the one that suggests that SY recruits his corvids to deal with any requests or prayers, so he has more time to "read those frivolous books and practice those instruments that you're dreadful at playing", incidentally, inside SQQ's home. Meetings start being held there, instead of anywhere else. By the time the other peak lords figure out what's going on, SY hasn't been seen outside of Qing Jing Peak for weeks. They're petrified about what SQQ - the one most adamantly against SY's existence on the peak - has done to SY, and go rushing to see what's going on in their shixiong's home. When they get there, they find SY comfortable in SQQ's home, letting him preen his wings as he rants relentlessly about a new book he's reading, pausing to greet them with a confused smile as SQQ smirks smugly from where he's perched, wrapping his arms around an oblivious SY.
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puppetmaster13u · 11 months ago
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Prompt 138
Danny squints up at the blurry form cradling him, brain trying to catch up with his situation. He can feel the pulse of his siblings’ cores nearby, gently pulsing contentedly despite the chaos of his last memories. His limbs feel too small and pudgy, too-small fingers gripping onto something as his vision started to clear. 
There was a man, holding him? Cradling his too-small form like he was an infant- was he an infant? He was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to be, he had been older but now he wasn’t. He squinted up at the stranger, green eyes meeting green. Huh. They kind of looked like he could be their dad or something. 
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thechy-fychannel · 4 months ago
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y'all ever think abt how it was julie having the affair and it is even said multiple times that she was the one who left him, yet wilson was still the one who left their home and moved in with house. like. he couldn't bear to stay in their home alone. he immediately ran to house and stayed on his couch for weeks. suffered through his pranks and his laziness and his manipulation. telling him he wants him gone while sabotaging his attempts to leave. and he only left once he got a girlfriend again.
#chyanne speaks#house md#hilson#hate crimes md#gregory house#james wilson#i think his inability to be alone is such an interesting quality of his that isnt touched on enough#like yes we all haha at his long string of unsuccessful relationships but we dont talk abt it all stemming from his inability to be alone#his first wife leaves him and then he remarried quickly#he cheats on the second wife and remarries quickly#the third wife cheats on him and leaves him and he immediately moves in with house#and then starts dating a patient and immediately moves in with her#but!!! then he moves into the hotel and is alone for like almost a year! and honestly he NEEDED IT#bc GROWTH happened in that year and he meets someone who doesn't fit his M.O. who breaks away from the mold#although he does immediately move in with her too but still. amber was different. she was the step in the right direction#and then she dies.#and then wilson throws himself into the left field. everything needs to change. he's spent so long fearing being alone.#so he tries to leave so he is completely and totally alone without house to fall back on#but house needs him. he needs him too much. they need each other too much.#and he falls back to house again. and he's content that way. he's always the most content when he's with house. always feels the least alone#and then sam comes back into his life and ruins e v e r y t h i n g#he falls right back onto those old patterns. kicks house out and moves her in. and then what happens??? of course??? she leaves him. again.#and then he's alone again and it hurts. he gets a cat that we only hear about twice and then never gets brought up again#but wilson has his kitty. he has house. he's not alone. he can be content.#and then house fucks everything up. he goes to prison. wilson is alone again.#im honestly SHOCKED that wilson didnt remarry in that year they were apart but he was rly trying to change!#he was working on himself and trying to make changed he thought would be good for him#and then house comes back. and house won't LET wilson be alone. he wont leave him alone.#and it's exactly what wilson has been yearning for since the day he drove that car into cuddys house#and in the end. as long as he had house that was all that mattered. as long as he had house he wasn't alone.
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yeetushaitus · 3 months ago
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just a little celebratory drawing for the release of the ace attorney investigations collection!! aai2 is one of my favorite games EVER and im so happy that capcom has FINALLY decided to give it an official localization!!!
funny story about aai2 i started watching an lp of it like 3 years ago but was kinda losing interest in aa in general so i dropped it, came back to the exact same lp in like may-ish and then like 2 days before i finished the lp the collection was announced. LIKE U COULDNT HAVE ANNOUCED IT LIKE A MONTH EARLIER SO I COULD PLAY IT FOR MYSELF COME ON CAPCOM
anyways am currently watching like. SO many aai2 lps its not even funny
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zarnzarn · 2 months ago
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(check the tags for more and also the tag for other fics in the story!)
athena, scowling as she gets bullied into marrying the people she pined over for the last 1000 years, suddenly realising something: wait a minute
odysseus: what?
athena, frozen: wait a damn minute you know what this gives me rights to do
penelope, also realising: oh fuck yes
odysseus: I don't like the sound of whatever's happening here what are you two fucking talking about?
athena, grabbing the marriage wine and tossing it back, then kissing her new wife and husband and handing penelope a spear as she picks up a mace: we'll be back shortly, you can start celebrations without us.
penelope: do u have anything that can start a fire
athena, pulling out an old contract and scanning it before throwing it over her shoulder: yes. are you scared of heights or can we fly.
penelope: fucking bring it I've waited years for this moment
zeus: where are they going
hermes, picking up the contract: they're going to... Ogygia? Oh fucking shit they're going to fucking kill Calypso- hey, hello, WAIT-
#odysseus disappears midway because athena plants one on him so hard his soul evaporates#(strategic to make him stop from coming after them and also from passion she forgot to hold back for once)#(and also shes maybe possibly in love and cant wait to get vengeance on Calypsos bitch ass who hurt him so much for so long)#penelope has had to deal with calypos afteraffects for literally the rest of their lives. from flashbacks to odysseus inconsolably crying#at her feet for forgiveness some days even though shes always said frim the first moment that it wasnt his fault#the rest of the gods have to chase them down to prevent them from eternally torturing calypso (goddesses cant die <3)#athenas blazing mad and sick with guilt and horror. she couldn't attack before because it would be seen as an attack from olympus#but as a wife! as two wifes! no political implications there no holds barred calypso gets her ass BEAT#but also pls imagine them chasing her and gods chasing them round and round the island while screaming#odysseus wavered like 17 times on whether to ask hermes for a lift there or not but goes in the end#their honeymoon in truth ends up being on ogygia#athena lovingly and seductively teaching penelope how to fillet a person both of them covered in ichor#odysseus with a hand over his mouth blushing grinning tears in eyes torn between turned on and terrified to be back and crying coz they lov#him that much.#((he goes to her just before they leave in the cave she used to drag him to. she can barely hold herself up and hes shaking to approach))#((but he's stronger now. settled and satisfied and content. he kneels by her and sets down bandages next to her.))#((i told you i was married he says. and because his truest weapon is his tongue- if youd just listened i wouldve found us both a way out))#she sobs and he leaves. the scars will never fade fully but he feels lighter as he steps out into the sun where athene and pen are waiting.#bloodsoaked and being shouted at by hera but smiling at him widely and gleefully as he approaches. takes a hand each and presses him btwn.#he squeezes back with a smile and leans into them. his beautiful horrifying wives#odypenath#odypenetha#odysseus#penelope#athena#odypen#odyath#penath#epic the musical#love in paradise
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cowboycatss · 5 months ago
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Hi cowboycatss how do you feel about cowboys and killjoys
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gosh it’s so crazy you ask anon who is totally not dykobra-kid who sketched out an outfit idea for the venom siblings that i then turned into this
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wordstome · 1 year ago
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kingdom come - i
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king König x princess & assassin reader
2nd person, no y/n, she/her pronouns, afab reader, romance, enemies to lovers, arranged marriage, kind of age gap because König has been king for a good chunk of time but it's not really much of a factor, fantasy/medieval setting, magic exists but it's the creepy kind ordinary people don't fuck with
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tw: swearing and König gets a boner. what's new
[NEXT]
GUESS WHO'S BACK ON HER BULLSHIT HAHAAA IT'S MEEE STARTING A NEW SERIES/AU AGAINNNnnnnn. Don't fret, I'm still working on university au! I just started watching The Great (the tv show) and I was like hmm. I should get back to that one idea I had.
p.s. When I mention a "mask" on König, imagine a sort of phantom of the opera, Brahms kinda thing. He isn't always wearing the hood.
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Outside, the bells are tolling. Back home, you’ve only ever heard church bells ringing to rally the troops. But here, in these foreign lands, they ring for a royal wedding.
You're wearing a truly massive dress shaped like a pastry. It's a work of art, to be sure, but it leaves you feeling restrained and vulnerable. You should be wearing armor into war—hard boiled leather and curtains of steel rings, not delicate lace and silken ribbons. You're walking into a battle: you would have liked to be able to bend forward further than thirty degrees.
You're at least glad you don't have to wear a veil—it would have been borderline unbearable if you had your vision restricted on top of everything else. It does mean, however, that you can see him standing at the end of the aisle, waiting for you.
A gigantic man with a soldier's physique, wearing a mask that covers more than half his face. Just the sight of him sends a a chill down your spine.
The officiant’s voice booms out over the assembly, but you don’t hear any of it. The sound washes over you, distant and echoing, as if your head is underwater. Your whole being is on alert as you tilt your face upwards to look at the only part of your soon-to-be-husband that you can see properly: his eyes.
They bore into you as if they're looking straight into your soul. As if they're revealing all of your secrets. For a moment, you feel disarmed, even though you can still feel the calming, solid presence of your trusty dagger against your thigh.
As the officiant finishes the wedding vows, he offers his hand to you, his touch shockingly gentle.
You steel your resolve and stare resolutely back at him as you place your hand in his, and the officials begin to bind them together with velvet cords. You remind yourself who you are, where you are, and what you must do.
You remind yourself that you have to kill him as they tie the final knot.
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The woods are foreboding, home to a darkness that seems infinite and all-consuming. The heavy old trees that surround the palace grounds shut out most sunlight and all moonlight, and sometimes it feels as if the forest itself is a living, conscious thing brimming with a dangerous unknown. It's proven to be an effective line of defense in the past: citizens don’t dare to trespass on the royal grounds as it is, but an extra deterrent never hurt anybody.
Except perhaps enemy soldiers. But they learn their lesson quickly.
To you, however, the woods are comforting. You’ve spent many lonely nights amongst these trees, training until your body was sore all over. These trunks have withstood many a misplaced blow, these exposed roots have been your downfall many a time, and this mossy undergrowth has cushioned your bruises during many a tumble and fall.
Tonight, however, there is no training. No combat, no groans of pain, no thuds against wood or flesh. You are blanketed in quiet, something sorely needed as you contemplate the days to come.
This is it. The task you’ve trained for all your life is here. Every sore joint and pulled muscle, every tear-soaked pillowcase, every scolding in Father’s office has led to this. Sometimes it seemed as if the day would never come, as if years of reading, shooting, riding and sparring would be for naught. Though your breath rattles the leaves around you, you feel as if you’ve been holding your breath ever since Father broke the news. This is happening.
You leave in a few hours, as soon as the sun comes over the horizon. Your maids have already packed your luggage—you had to enlist their help after it became too difficult to pick what to bring and what not to bring. If all went well, you’d be back in this room in a few weeks. But what could you afford to bring? What did you need for your sanity? What minute details of an object could compromise your position?
Luckily, Calliope, your most trusted lady-in-waiting, was able to step in when she found you sitting on your rug, clutching your set of cloth dolls—the only toys you’d ever owned as a child that weren’t made with murder in mind—and suggest you take a breath of fresh air. You don’t know where you’d be without her, honestly. You may be your father’s pride and joy of a perfectly well-rounded monarch and killing machine, but you would never have gotten here without her by your side.
You sigh and lean your head against the thick limb you’re lying on. If you didn’t already know you’d wake up with a complaining spine that would then have to spend days riding a horse, you’d go to sleep right here, right now. The woods are your home, these trees your solace. You’ll miss it terribly, as the only place you can truly avoid all servants, generals, teachers, and parents.
Well. Parent.
But as with all things—Father’s rare good mood, your training days, peacetime—the sweet, silent embrace of the forest can’t last forever.
Reluctantly, you give the tree one last pat and climb down, making the trudge back to your room so you can at least attempt to catch a few winks of sleep.
It takes quite a few days of travel to get to your destination. You arrive in the empire next door's capital city saddle-sore and on edge. This was the snakes’ nest, the heart of the beast.
And yet…people are happy.
The mood in your hometown is far quieter and more grim—your country has been at war with this one for as long as you can remember, and yet the contrast could not be more vast. Back home, people walk directly from place to place, and don’t make eye contact with each other. Here, children play unsupervised, outdoor markets overflow with people, and windows are thrown wide open as neighbors chat.
You don’t know how to feel. The previous king here was a ruthless conqueror, building an empire by invading neighboring countries and forcing their monarchs to yield—or killing them when they were defiant. Your own land had only escaped being absorbed into the empire by employing rigorous military discipline and strict wartime measures. Yet here, in the heart of the empire, you would never be able to tell it was a nation at war.
And now you’re marrying the king’s son. The current king. The one they call König. So little is known about him that his entire existence is shrouded in rumor: that the hood he wears conceals a monstrous, disfigured face, that he plotted his father’s demise, that his first wife died not of childbirth, but was assassinated in quiet due to being unable to provide an heir.
You don’t plan on sticking around long enough to find out if the rumors are true.
To your surprise, your reception by the people feels more curious than hostile. You’d expected a bit of resistance, or at least a few dirty looks, considering you're the princess of the country they've been at war with for years. But whatever König has told them has been far more charitable than you anticipated.
Your arrival at the palace is greeted by a flurry of activity. Your entourage scatters to put affairs in order, but Calliope and a small contingent of guards follows you into the main hall. Not that you need them—but you need to keep up appearances. No one outside your family’s most tight-knit circle knows you can throw a punch, much less have an assassin’s training.
You don’t feel in the least bit prepared to meet your fiancé—and target—face to face fresh off a days-long journey, but you’re ushered into the main hall anyway. It seems your task has already begun whether you like it or not.
“Ah, princess. Welcome to my humble home.” You hear him before you see him, his voice heavy with an accent. There’s something a bit charming about it, you think—before the sight of him shakes some sense back into you.
He’s huge. He towers over even his own palace guard, broad with muscle, and moves with a deadly raw power even in this nonthreatening setting.
When his father still ruled, before the current peacetime, stories of the empire’s prodigal heir on the frontlines served as frightening bedtime story and a terrifying cautionary tale for the nation’s soldiers. A beast in a hood who fought with the strength of ten men.
You stand your ground as he approaches you. The hood, then, is real—although the stories were so consistent about it that it was never really in question, was it? What the stories had left out were his eyes—striking and green, piercing into your soul as he bends to kiss the back of your hand. It’s an odd sensation that sends shivers racing up your spine.
“The pleasure is mine, your majesty,” you respond, a hint of apprehension in your tone. Of course you had been expecting some form of courtly courtesy, but for some reason you hadn’t expected him to be such a…gentleman. A part of you had been expecting some feral animal, needing to be put down.
"I'm sure you must be exhausted from your journey," he says. "I hope you will find your rooms to your liking." Something about his demeanor is almost...bored? As if greeting his future wife is just another task he's obligated to complete.
He doesn't join you for dinner that night, which is odd. The servants inform you that he's taking care of some urgent business. You hope that your dejection is taken as disappointment that you won't have an opportunity to get to know your fiancé. You are, but not the way people may think.
After all, getting to know your target is half the battle.
You're left to your own devices the next day. König, you're informed, won't be available. That urgent business from last night appears to be an ongoing situation.
Fine by you. You could use some time to prepare.
You spend the day wandering the palace, familiarizing yourself with the grounds and plotting an escape route. You're halted on your brisk survey when you stumble upon a...garden?
Unlike the perfectly manicured hedges outside the palace, or the groomed efficiency of the kitchen gardens, this place is small. Quiet. A little overgrown, but clearly taken care of. The grass is long and soft, dappled in sunshine. Flowers burst forward, crowded around trellises spiraling with vines.
Part of you feels like a trespasser in this private little sanctum, but another part of you is set at ease by the idle tranquility of this place. You pause, feeling a pang of homesickness. It reminds you of the forest: wild in its own way, but gentle and welcoming at the same time.
Something at the corner of your vision catches your eye. A bush bursting forward with round, dark little berries.
Nightshade. Deadly nightshade, in fact. What is this doing in this peaceful little garden? You move forward to examine them closer.
"You shouldn't be here."
You whirl around to find König standing behind you. You had been so absorbed by the garden that you hadn't detected his approach.
Your cheeks burn. You've only been here a day, and already you're letting your guard down. This won't do.
"My apologies, your majesty. I got....lost."
You hold your breath as he draws near. His expression is unreadable—not that you can see most of it, anyway. But when you meet his gaze, you can tell he's sizing you up.
"This is quite a long way to wander."
Shit, is he suspicious? Thinking fast, your brain supplies the best answer you can muster.
"Should a future queen not know the palace she is to live in?"
"Mmm. You make a fair point."
Before you can say or do anything further, he's standing right in front of you. "That's nightshade, you know." You can feel him watching you, assessing your reaction. "Not many can recognize it."
"I..." You can't very well tell him that you know what nightshade looks like because you're an expert in deadly poisons. "I had been wondering what they were."
"I see." He leans forward and plucks a berry off the bush, rolling it between his fingers. "Have you ever tasted one?"
Does he know? Is that a threat? You can't read his expression behind that goddamned mask of his. You stare at him, hoping you look dumbfounded instead of panicked.
"No? They're quite sweet, you know." He holds it out to you. "Care to try one?"
"Your Majesty, I—"
"Don't look so nervous." If you had ever thought he looked frightening before, there's something uncanny about the half-smile that he gives you now. "I didn't expect you to say yes." Before you can say or do anything, he pops the berry in his mouth.
You're too stunned to do anything but watch as he chews for a moment and swallows. One berry won't kill him, but you're more concerned about why he's doing this. Is he trying to intimidate you?
"This was my mother's garden." He gestures to the general surroundings. "I spent a lot of time here as a child. Peaceful, isn't it?"
You let out a tiny sigh of relief now that the conversation appears to be moving on. "Yes. Quite."
"It's always been a place to get away. The first time I ate a nightshade berry was right here, when I was six. I was violently sick for weeks." His tone is a little too light for someone describing being poisoned as a child, and it's unnerving.
"That's when I learned to be careful of things that are too sweet. A good lesson to learn, don't you think?" He walks towards you, and you brace yourself for anything.
He stops next to you, you facing one way and him the other. "Take care then, princess. I will see you tomorrow."
You stare resolutely ahead. "Yes."
And hopefully you won't see him for much longer after that.
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Fuck. You forgot about this part.
You had been prepared for this, of course, but you only realize now that you hadn't been mentally prepared. It wasn't until Calliope was helping you undress that you remembered what usually happens between a man and a woman the night of the wedding.
You pace the room, stewing and plotting, getting increasingly antsy before the door swings open and the man himself comes strutting into the bedroom.
"You look like a cornered deer." You hear König shut the door behind him, but you don't turn around.
"I've never done this before." Mentally, you curse yourself for the quaver in your voice.
"Well. Tonight won't be your first."
"What?" You do turn at that, watching him carelessly shed layers all across the room between swigs of his drink.
"I have no interest in bedding you. We do have to sleep in the same room for appearances, though." He plucks a grape from a cluster sitting on a side table and throws it up in the air, catching it with his mouth.
You haven't been in his presence much in the past few days, but each time you have, something about your encounters with him have shaken you up and set you on edge. Somehow, he's kept you on your toes even with a limited presence. Your meeting in the garden was dizzying and confusing, the ceremony set you on high alert. And now, he's thrown you another curveball.
It feels almost too easy. He's just going to go to sleep in the same room as you? No fanfare? "You don't want to...consummate the marriage?"
"You sound upset." He cocks an eyebrow at you. "Were you hoping to?"
"No!" Your face feels hot as he gives you that lopsided half-smile again, more like a smirk this time.
"That's a shame. I prefer fucking willing participants, you see." He drapes himself over the elaborate chaise lounge opposite the bed.
"Are you usually this vulgar?" you retort.
"I see no reason for pretense. We're married, after all." Curiously, he hasn't taken his mask off. Does he sleep in it? Or is he only keeping it on because you're here?
You feel silly now, dressed in a flimsy little silken thing, wrapped up like a present for a brute who won't even touch you. Considerate of him, you suppose. Not that it will matter for very long.
"Sleep well then, hmm? You should be well rested for your first day as queen tomorrow." There's a dangerous gleam in his eye, but it disappears so quickly you wonder if you had imagined it.
"Yes," you say, sitting on the bed while not taking your eyes off of him. "Sleep well."
You give it a few hours, just to be safe. A few hours of laying awake staring at the ceiling. A few hours of watching as moonlight bathes the room in silver light. A few hours of watching him.
The deepening darkness casts sharp shadows across his face, making him seem even more inhuman. What do bloodthirsty emperors dream of? Dominating the weak? Slaughtering the innocent? Conquering women? You shudder. Best not to know.
It's well past midnight when you slowly, quietly get up and pull your dagger from its hidden holster. One downwards thrust, and you're going home. One quick motion, and all of this is over.
It's a little anticlimactic, you think. But this is for the best. For you. For your people. For your family.
Light as a feather, you straddle him, hovering over him just enough so that your weight doesn't wake him. You try not to think about how intimate this position is, and remind yourself that this is the best way to prevent him from getting up or struggling, should your first strike not end him immediately. Which it will, of course.
You take a deep breath as you position the blade right over his heart, calming the fluttering anxiety in your mind. The beginning of a new chapter of your life begins now.
You plunge the dagger downwards.
In an instant, König's eyes fly open. Before you can react at all, his hand has seized your wrist in an iron grip, the tip of your dagger a hair's length from his chest.
"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" He purrs. "A little assassin?"
You grit your teeth and attempt to overpower him: you're so, so close. But his strength is so overwhelming that you can't even get the tip of the dagger to make contact. Panic starts to set in. This isn't good. This is disastrous, actually. He was supposed to be asleep!
You attempt to pull away, to get away, to do anything, but it's no use. "You don't seem surprised," you spit.
"It's not every day your most bitter enemy offers you his daughter's hand in marriage as a truce," he replies, clear amusement in his voice. Is he enjoying this? "Of course I smelled a rat. You must think me a fool."
"No." Yeah, you kind of had.
"Lying ill suits you, princess." You cry out as he jams his fingers into the tendons in your wrist, forcing you to release the dagger. You watch, helplessly, as he picks it up with his other hand and turns it over, studying it in the moonlight.
"What a delicate little knife," he muses. In your hand, it's a sizeable weapon. But held in his fingers it looks small, harmless. To your dismay, he then proceeds to chuck it at the opposite wall, the blade sticking itself solidly in between two panels.
"You knew?" you ask, a tremor in your traitorous voice.
"Oh, I suspected. You had me disappointed for a while—I thought you would have made an attempt well before this." He lets out a deep chuckle that sends terror through you. "For a moment I even thought that you were as you presented: just some poor little lamb, a peace offering given up to the slaughter." His eyes narrow behind the mask. "I am glad to see that you have proven to be much more interesting than that."
"Interesting?" Out of all the reactions you would have expected him to have, this is not one of them. Fear, anger, even immediate violence. Not...interest.
"You have no idea," he says. Your eyes widen as he you feel his hand run up your thigh.
That's not the only thing you feel, though. He shifts a bit underneath you, and it's then that the earlier flush to your cheeks returns in full force. Is he...hard?!
"If you're going to kill me, then get on with it," you ground out through your teeth.
"Little one, if I had wanted you dead immediately, I would have already pinned you down and snapped your neck. No, you've given me a gift: a gift I intend to cherish." You shiver as he slides a hand up your thigh. "A challenge."
"Is this a game to you?" You're not sure if your breath is running ragged from fear or anger, now.
"I could end this at any time, you know." You gasp involuntarily as a hand closes around your throat. "But that would be no fun, now would it?"
"You are a fool, then." You stare at him defiantly, even as his grip constricts your breathing. "Because I will kill you."
His eyes dance with some mad glee. "That's what I like to hear."
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Hiiiiiiiii besties. I've been chewing on the idea of a medieval royalty sort of au since before Shrike, and I came up with this premise like. At least a year or two ago, before I was even in the COD fandom. So I'm glad to finally be making some real headway on it! I have no idea how many parts this is going to have. I have a lot of plot planned for it, so we're just gonna have to see where the vibes take us!
I'd like to thank @danibee33 my angel as always. I bounced a lot of royal/medieval/king König ideas off of her, some of which I still may use, but I changed the plot drastically when I had an epiphany a week or two ago. Hope you like this one babe <3 Also, thank you @kneelingshadowsalome and @gremlingottoosilly for their historical/time period aus. Your fics gave me a real kick in the ass to finish this.
Also shoutout to Pedro Pascal fans? I stumbled upon some breathtakingly kinky fanfiction on this beloved hellsite featuring the Mandalorian, and thought: you know what? If people can proudly write and publish the nastiest, most shameless smut I've ever read, then I can push through whatever impostor syndrome, perfectionist embarrassment I have with my work and get it done.
As usual, please let me know your feedback! I'm trying out a bit of a different characterization for König (not that much different, he's still our beloved violent horny maniac), and I want to know what people think.
I'm also going to be using my taglist again. If you were tagged here and don't want to be tagged anymore, please let me know! And if you would like to be added to the taglist, drop a reply <3
@crowbird @poohkie90 @cumikering @iytatsworld @papaver-decervicatus @anxietyrain @riotakire @ax0lotly @cookiepie111 @kacchasu @no1runawaymilkdad @chthonian-spectre @backwards-readings @yxllowtxpe @garbau @hexqueensupreme @queenthorin1 @violetstyless @her-majesty-theking @vegan-peppermint @peonytarian @ghostslittlegf @euuuuuuun @e1x03 @kokonoiwife @deaddainish @dragonfang @teehee-47 @catluvwr
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chickenoptyrx · 6 months ago
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Thinkin bout how similar they are
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