#the stupidity is off the charts with this one

[loverslantern]

The Hunter and The Witch~ Dean Winchester x f!reader

Description: John realises where the demon will strike next so they head there to stop the next killing.

Warnings: Cannon violence

Word Count: 4.6k

Salvation

(Masterlist, Previous chapter, Outfit Board)

  The room is filled with John’s research. The walls are covered with post-its, pictures, newspaper articles, weather charts, and hieroglyphics all about the yellow-eyed demon. There are papers strewn across the desk with the Colt and shelves of hefty books lining the walls. “You know to anyone else this would look like a psychotic break,” I think aloud, examining the wall of information. “Well—”

  “Whatever stupid comment you’re going to make, don’t,” John cuts me off. I make a face he cannot see, mocking him.

  “This is it,” he continues. “This is everything I know. Look, our whole lives we’ve been searching for this demon right? Not a trace, just…nothing. Until about a year ago. For the first time, I picked up a trail.”

  “And that’s when you took off,” Dean concludes. He hasn’t stopped pacing since we got here.

  “Yeah, that’s right. The demon must have come out of hiding, or hibernation.”

  “Alright so what’s this trail you found?” he asks.

  “It starts in Arizona, then New Jersey, California. Houses burned down to the ground,” he explains. “It's going after families, just like it went after us.”   “Families with infants?” Sam asks, leaning against a counter.   “Yeah. The night of the kid's six-month birthday.”   “I was six months old that night?”   “Exactly six months,” John echoes.   “So basically, this demon is going after these kids for some reason. The same way it came for me? So Mom's death...Jessica. It's all because of me?”   “We don't know that Sam,” Dean defends.   “Oh really? Cause I'd say we're pretty damn sure Dean,” he bites back.   “For the last time, what happened to them was not your fault,” Dean says, his voice lined with frustration.   “Right. It's not my fault but it's my problem,” he shouts.   “No, it's not your problem it's our problem!”

  “Okay. That's enough,” John commands, standing abruptly. Immediately they stop, backing down as they take breaths. 

  Sam breaks the momentary silence. “So why's he doing it? What does he want?” It’s an almost impossible question especially when one will never be good enough, it doesn’t bring people back nor make you understand. The most it can give is a direction on how to stop it if that. “The answer can range from chaos junky to wanting an army,” I answer.

  “I wish I had more answers, I do,” John adds. “I’ve always been one step behind it. Look, I’ve never gotten there in time to save…” He looks down with a frown on his face.   “Alright, so how do we find it..before it hits again?” Dean asks.   “There are signs. It took me a while to see the pattern but it's there in the days before these fires; signs crop up in an area. Cattle deaths, temperature fluctuations, electrical storms. And then I went back and checked...and…”   “These things happened in Lawrence,” Dean finished.

  John nods, “A week before your mother died. And in Palo Alto...before Jessica. And these signs, they're starting again.”   “Where?” Sam asks   “Salvation, Iowa.”

********

  The roads seem endless as we head to Iowa; land stretching for miles. John's black truck leads the way through countless hours and misty roads until he suddenly pulls off onto the shoulder. Call it a learned habit or whatever else; either way we exit the Impala with haste, meeting a distressed John outside his vehicle. “God damn it!” he curses, kicking the dirt by his tires.

  “What is it?” Dean asks.

  “Son of a bitch!” he curses again instead of answering.

  “What is it?!” he tries again.

  “I just got a call from Caleb,” he explains.

  “Is he okay?” Dean asks, worry on his face.

  “He’s fine. Jim Murphy’s dead.”

  “Who’s Jim?” I ask. I know the Winchesters have many connections, yet it still surprises me how many they do have, especially when my father had little to none. I think he only had John by the time he married Mom, and that was really only an ‘I owe you.’ Turns out no one wants to keep in touch or be friends with the guy who married a Witch. “He’s a Pastor that would look after us sometimes,” Dean explains. It comes back to me a little: Sam mentioned calling Pastor Jim for information on their father months ago, and Dean telling me memories long ago in the faint autumn sun.

  “How?” Sam asks.

  “His throat was slashed. He bled out,” John answers. “Caleb said they found traces of sulfur at Jim's place.”

  “A demon,” Dean concludes. His father nods. “The Demon?”

  “I don't know. ‘Could be he just got careless, he slipped up. Maybe the demon knows we're getting close.”

  “That doesn’t sound like something he would do though,” I chime in. “Why suddenly change the pattern even if he does think you’re getting close?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “What do we do?” Dean asks.   “Now we act like every second counts. There are two hospitals and a health center in this county. We split up, cover more ground. I want records. I want a list of every infant that's going to be six months old in the next week,” John orders.   “Dad that could be dozens of kids. How do we know which one's the right one?” Sam points out.   “We check ���em all that's how. ‘You got any better ideas?”   “No sir.”  John nods, satisfied with that response. He turns to his truck and stops, his head hanging low. The last few days might be the most I’ve seen him upset. “Dad?” Dean says softly.   “Yeah. It's Jim. You know, I can't....” His face hardens, ridding his voice and face of sadness. “This ends now. I'm ending it. I don't care what it takes.”

  I tug on the bottom of my blouse, adjusting how it sits on my chest before walking through the door Dean holds open. He’d been quiet the entire way to the hospital, even when we dropped off Sam at the medical center, I worry it might be about Pastor Jim’s death or the weight of the whole yellow-eyed situation but I’m not sure.

  We walk over to the receptionist's desk, a pretty brunette sitting behind it. He doesn’t make a face or remark about her looks which is even more concerning. “Hi. Is there anything I can do for you?” she asks, shining a perfect smile. 

  “Hello,” I smile back, feeling a burning gaze on me. “I’m Agent Spears and this is my partner, Agent Taylor,” I pull out my ID from my pocket, showing proof of my lie. I look at Dean, his eyes shooting up to my face from wherever they were, his eyebrows raised and eyes a little wide. My eyebrows furrow and my nose scrunches a little with my confusion. He looks at my ID and then at the woman in front of us. “Right,” he mumbles, fumbling with the pocket of his suit jacket for his ID. He pulls it out, flipping it open quickly with a boyish smile. “We…” I look back at the woman. “We were hoping to look at some files…”

********

  Our file reading had been cut short when we received a worrying call from Sam informing us of his vision. It hadn’t taken us long to get to the motel room to regroup and talk; Sam sitting with his head in his hands at the table while his father sat on the end of one of the queen beds. Dean sits on the edge of the other bed, the sleeves of his white button-down rolled up to his elbows; we didn’t have time to change into normal clothes when we essentially rushed over here. And I stand a little awkwardly by Dean, arms crossed against my chest after hearing everything Sam has to say. 

  “A vision,” John repeats flatly.

  “Yes. I saw the demon burning a woman on the ceiling,” Sam explains through gritted teeth, messaging his temples.

  “And you think this is going to happen to this woman you met because…”

  “Because these things happen exactly the way I see them,” Sam finishes.

  “It’s almost like he already explained that,” I remark, earning a sharp glare from John. But, it’s not my fault he’s not getting with the program.

  “It started out as nightmares. Then it started happening while he was awake,” Dean elaborates, rising from the bed and crossing to the counter behind his brother to get more coffee.   Sam winces. “Yeah. It's like the closer I get to anything to do with the demon the stronger the visions get.”

  “Alright. When were you going to tell me about this?” John asks, his words directed at his eldest son. Both boys pause, looking at their father.

  “We didn’t know what it meant,” Dean answers.   “Alright, something like this starts happening to your brother, you pick up the phone and you call me,” John replies firmly.

  The coffee pot and mug slam back onto the counter, discarded as Dean strides towards his father. “Call you? Are you kidding me? Dad, I called you from Lawrence alright? Sam called you when I was dying. I mean, getting you on the phone? I got a better chance of winning the lottery.”   “You're right. Although I'm not too crazy about this new tone of yours, you're right. I'm sorry.”

  “I’m sure you can watch your own tone Johnny Boy,” I interject, an unamused smile on my face. I’ll give it to him, I never thought I’d hear him say he was wrong ever let alone multiple times in the last couple of days. But, I’m also not fond of his accusatory tone as if this was the boy's fault.   “Look guys, visions or no visions, ‘fact is, we know the demon is coming tonight,” Sam cuts in. “And this family's gonna go through the same hell we went through.”   “No, they're not. No one is, ever again,” John reaffirms. Then, the ringing of a phone cuts through the atmosphere. “Hello?” Sam answers.

  “Who is this?”

…

 “Meg,” he states. The name is like a knife being plunged into my gut. It is a reminder of the cruelty I put her through, how it was my fault she died as she did. The boys tried to convince me that it wasn’t my fault but they were wrong. Her death may not have been on purpose but it was certainly my fault. And now she’s back. That night is a reminder of what I am and all that I’m capable of. No matter how much I try to hold back and no matter how good I am I can never get rid of what is in my blood.

  “Last time I saw you you fell out of a window,” Sam answers. Again there is no blame put on anyone, it’s framed as an accident or something that happened and yet it does not feel that way to me. “...Just your feelings? That was a seven-story drop.” She should be dead and yet she isn’t. Maybe this should feel like a second chance or rid me of some guilt, but it doesn’t. Sam looks over to his Dad before he answers whatever question he was asked. “My Dad. I don't know where my Dad is.”

  He hesitates and then the phone is put into his father's hands. “This is John…I'm here”   There’s a long pause before he speaks again. “Caleb? You listen to me. He's got nothing to do with anything. You let him go.”

  It doesn’t take a genius to figure out she’s torturing this man. 

  “…I don't know what you're talking about,” He answers steadily. “…Caleb. Caleb!... I'm gonna kill you, you know that?” The boys step closer to him. “Okay…I said okay, I'll bring you the colt.”

  My eyes widen.   “It's gonna take me about a day's drive to get there…That's impossible. I can't get there in time and I can't just carry a gun on the plane.” There’s a silence and a grim look on his face before John hands back Sam’s phone. He runs a hand down his face as he paces, explaining that Meg demanded he bring the Colt to a warehouse in Lincoln alone otherwise everyone they’ve ever known, every hunter friend, every loved one will die.   “So you think Meg is a demon?” Sam questions.   “Either that, or she's possessed by one. It doesn't really matter,” John replies.

  “‘How else could she have…um… survived,” I mumble.   “What do we do?” Dean asks.   “I’m going to Lincoln,” John declares.

  “What?” Dean exclaims.   “It doesn't look like we have a choice. If I don't go, a lot of people die, our friends die.”   “Dad, the demon is coming tonight. For Monica and her family. That gun is all we got, you can't just hand it over,” Sam points out.   “Who said anything about handing it over? Look, besides us and a coupla of vampires no ones really seen the gun, no one knows what it looks like.”   “So what, you're just going to pick up a ringer at a pawn shop?” Dean asks.   “Antique store,” John clarifies.   “Cause that’s so different,” I remark. I mean, it is but in this instance, there might as well not be a difference. 

  “You're going to hand Meg a fake gun and hope she doesn't notice?” Dean interjects.   “Look, as long as it's close, she shouldn't be able to tell the difference,” he reasons.   “Yeah but for how long? What happens when she figures it out?” Dean points out, his voice firm.

  “I just...I just need to buy a few hours, that's all.”

  “I know you’re supposed to go alone but I can go with you and offer assistance from afar,” I offer.

  “No,” he says firmly. “You need to be with the boys.” I never thought I’d hear him say those words but with the way he directs them at me so sharply I know what he means. I can offer a level of protection against the yellow-eyed demon that wouldn’t be there otherwise.

  “You want us to stay here, and kill this demon by ourselves?” Sam asks, figuring out what his father meant as well.   “No Sam. I want to stop losing people we love. I want you to go to school, I want Dean to have a home. I want...I want Mary alive. It's just...I just want this to be over.”

********

  I can’t stop my leg from bouncing as we sit in the Impala, watching the house where the demon will strike next. The boys are better at hiding their nervousness, which may only be good in this instance, but I’m unsure. 

  John was long gone by now. His truck was packed with a fake gun and an arsenal of weapons. The real gun sitting between Sam and Dean in the front seat with only four bullets. Promises of “don’t die” and “finish this fight” were shared before he left. 

  Maybe I shouldn’t be nervous or maybe that’s a stupid remark. There’s a whole powerful and methodical demon to take down and a handful of people to protect in the process. I can’t mess up and I certainly can’t falter. I won’t. This is also why, for once, I chose simple clothing, opting for an all-black outfit that would be easy to move in. This had to go right.

  And no offense to the boys but I’ve been tuning out most of their conversations. I don’t need “what ifs” I just need focus, my ears tuned to the radio playing music quietly and my eyes trained on the house, waiting for the telltale signs.

  “You doin’ okay back there, sweetheart? You’re awfully quiet.”

  My eyes immediately follow the voice; so much for tuning them out. “I’m always quiet,” I defend.

  He smirks, somehow able to even at a time like this, “That’s not true.”

  “Hey,” I frown.

  “Didn’t say it was a bad thing,” he adds. “‘You nervous?” It’s a question, yet the way he looks at me through the rearview mirror makes me feel like he already knows the answer and is just asking out of courtesy. 

  “‘Course I am,” I answer. “And I know you guys are too…Which is fine! Nervous is good…probably.”

  “Well, don’t worry that pretty head of yours, we’ll be just fine. I’ll protect you,” he declares, winking. He’s all smug in the way he says it and the way he smiles. Yet, I’m sure he’s just trying to get me to smile. And it works. I smile, scuffing and shaking my head even though I know for a fact that he wasn’t joking about protecting me. “There she is,” he drawls, eyes dipping down. My nervousness does ease, which should be stupid when all he did was talk to me. Maybe that’s pathetic and maybe I don’t care if it is. 

  “Dean...ah...I wanna thank you,” Sam says, joining in on whatever this is.   “For what?” He responds, eyes breaking from the rearview mirror to look at his brother.   “For everything. You've always had my back you know? Even when I couldn't count on anyone I could always count on you. And uh...I don't know I just wanted to let you know, just in case.”   “Whoa whoa whoa, are you kidding me?”   “What?”   “Don't say just in case something happens to you. I don't wanna hear that fucking speech man. Nobody's dying tonight. Not us, not that family, nobody. Except for that demon. That evil son of a bitch ain't getting any older than tonight, you understand me?” Any softness Dean had moments ago seemed gone now. The light not-joking-joke was serious and ever so evident. This is a serious situation and I almost feel guilty for feeling a moment of ease, especially when the real fear of death lingers over all of us. Things can go wrong here really quickly; the Demon might not die tonight. The only thing I can promise and ensure, above all else, is that my boys aren’t dying.

********

  “Dad’s not answering,” Dean announces, his phone held to his ear. 

  “Maybe Meg was late,” Sam suggests. “Maybe cell reception’s bad.” 

  Of course, he may be right, there's always the possibility; yet it feels like nothing more than an attempt to be positive, to see things optimistically. 

  “Yeah, well—”

  “Wait. Listen,” Sam cuts Dean off. He rolls the dial on the radio, the breaking static getting louder.

  “The lights are flickering,” I add, eyes trained on the house. My heart hammers in my chest at the knowledge of what lurks ahead.

  “It’s coming,” Sam concludes.

  Nothing more needs to be said and no more evidence needs to be presented for us to haul it out of the car. I beeline it to the front door, my hand on the handle and the lock undone before my body is fully near it. The boys take the lead, taking careful steps down the hallway. Then, a man lunges forward swinging a bat into a lamp. It shatters to the floor with a resounding clash.

  “Get out of my house!” He yells, positioning himself to swing again. He has poor aim, a goatee, and a green sweater over a button-down, which doesn’t make for the most intimidating combination. 

  Dean surges forward, grappling with the man and the bat while Sam pleads for him to calm down. He fights against Dean who easily takes control, swinging him against the wall with a thud, the bat pressed across his throat. “Be quiet and listen to me,” Dean orders sharply. “Be quiet and listen. We are trying to help you.”

  God, that was kind of hot—Wait. Priorities, I remind myself. “Come on, Sam,” I nod, moving to the stairs. Dean can take care of himself and we had other things to worry about.

  “Charlie? Is everything okay?” A woman's voice cuts in just as I put one foot on the bottom step.

  “Monica get the baby!” Charlie yells frantically. 

  “Don’t go in the nursery!” The Winchesters yell at the same time. 

  I rush up the stairs, taking two at a time, throwing back another, “Sam!” In an attempt to urge him along. I hear a faint threat from Charlie and some light commotion as I move down the long corridor, seeing a flash of white rush into a room at the far end. I push my legs forward, breaking into a run. I skid into the bedroom, catching only the syllables of a sentence before I throw myself in front of the dark-haired woman clad in a white nightgown. Immediately, I launch a burst of energy toward the dark figure sending it back into the wall. I don’t have the gun, all I can do is keep it busy. 

  “Get out of here!” I yell, looking back only briefly. But, suddenly I’m flung sideways, my shoulder hitting the wall hard before I fall to the floor, picture frames rattling above me. “Go!” I order, pain erupting in my shoulder and down my arm as I pick myself up.

  “But my–”

  Yellow eyes shine as it raises its hand.

  “I’ll get your baby, just go!” 

  I intercept it again, throwing another blast that doesn’t seem to do anything more than halt and irritate it. Monica leaves the room. The baby erupts into tears, the commotion certainly startling it. The Demon tries to move me again with a flick of a wrist but I brace myself, using my powers to hold me in place as I lift my own hands and attempt to move it away from the crib. But, it barely shifts. And yet it feels like I’m fighting against gravity, a heavy invisible force trying to force me back as if weights were tied to my limbs. Even so, I push more of my powers forward, harsher and faster yet it still doesn’t budge even if it feels like a house was being thrown on top of me. 

  Then, Sam bursts through the doorway, freezing as he takes in the Demon. It seems to react to him, turning to him slightly. The Colt is raised and the shot rings in the air. The baby’s wailing becomes just as piercing as the gun. The Demon disappears into smoke, the bullet landing in the wall behind it, marking the wall. 

  I nearly collapse as the invisible weight is lifted off of me, my bones feel like jello–almost as if they too were giving up on me. I slump forward slightly, pulling myself toward the crib.

  “Where the hell did it go!” Sam yells.

  I ignore him, focusing on getting the kid out first. Before my hands even touch the wooden sides I can feel what is to come, the fire licking at my hands before there's one at all. I don’t know whether it's some sort of intuition or what Missouri had shown me all those months ago, either way, I quickly and carefully scoop up the crying baby, the crib exploding into flames as I step back and shield the child from it. The windows explode, flames crawling outwards—feeding on the oxygen.

  The moment I step into the hallway strong arms encircle me. He’s behind me, urging me forward with a hand on my middle back as we race out of the house, smoke filling the place rapidly. Sam and Monica aren’t that far in front of us, I guess she only left the room before and not the house itself.

  My lungs greedily take in clean air as we make it outside. The baby is taken from my arms and into the rightful one of her mothers. Charlie puts his arm around his wife’s, eyes scanning both his girls. “Thank you,” Monica says with tear-filled eyes. 

  I’m glad everyone was safe and yet I feel almost defeated, like there was more that could’ve been done. And I’m sure that same thought is going through the boy's heads too. All that we can do is watch as the house is consumed in flames, harsh oranges and reds licking at what is meant to be a place of safety. But, there in the burning nursery, through shattered windows, is a mocking dark silhouette that can only be one being.

  “It’s still in there!” Sam yells, starting for the front door.

  Dean grabs him quickly, holding him back, “Sam. Sam, no.”

  “Dean let me go, it’s still in there,” he argues, struggling against his hold.

  “No. It’s burning to the ground, it’s suicide.”

  “I don’t care,” Sam yells.

  “I do!’

  And just like that, something changes. I can’t explain what it is exactly, but it’s heavy and it’s real. Once more, all we can do is watch as the flames rise again, the Demon disappearing. 

********

  Dean paces the motel room, his phone to his ear as it rings for the umpteenth time. “Come on Dad, answer your phone damn it,” he grumbles. Given the last year his disappearance doesn’t seem out of character but because he was on this whole mission his lack of contact is worrisome. He hangs up with a huff, “Somethings wrong.”

  “Okay,” I sigh from my chair, “We’ll find him…again.” Whatever is wrong we can fix, or at the very least handle it better than the yellow-eyed demon (hopefully.) 

  Dean nods silently, stress and frustration clear in his features. Then, his attention goes to Sam who instead of answering stares at the wall with his classic bitchface. Dean tilts his head down, trying to get his brother's attention. “‘You hear me? Somethings wrong.”

  “If you had just let me go in there, I coulda ended all this.”

  “Sam, the only thing you would have ended was your life,” Dean counters.

  “You don’t know that,” Sam answers firmly.

  “The building was going down you wouldn’t be able to see let alone breathe long enough to even get to it or do anything,” I add.

  He shakes his head, “‘Doesn’t matter.”

  Dean walks towards where Sam sits on the end of one of the beds. “So what, you’re just willing to sacrifice yourself, is that it?”

  He stands up abruptly, towering over his brother. “Yeah. Yeah, you’re damn right I am.”

  “Well, that’s not going to happen, not as long as I’m around.”

  “What the hell are you talking about Dean? We’ve been searching for this demon our whole lives. It’s the only thing we’ve ever cared about.”

  “Sam, I wanna waste it. I do. Okay? But it’s not worth dying over.”

  “What?”

  “I mean it. If hunting this demon means getting yourself killed then I hope we never find the damn thing,” he doubles down.   “That thing killed Jess. That thing killed Mom,” Sam argues.   “You said it yourself once, that no matter what we do, they're gone, and they're never coming back.”

  Sam snaps. He grabs Dean by the collar of his shirt and shoves him hard against the wall. I stand quickly, ready to intervene but Dean throws me a quick look that tells me to not. 

  “Don't you say that, not you!” Sam yells, his voice breaking a little. “Not after all this don’t you say that.”   Despite the anger thrown at him Dean answers with soft, quiet words, “Sam look. The three of us...that's all we have...and it's all I have. Sometimes I feel like I'm barely holding it together man...and without you…or Y/N, or Dad…”

  “Dad,” Sam slumps, letting go and turning away. He runs a hand down his face as he walks across the room. “He should have called by now. Try him again.”   Dean presses a couple of buttons, then raises his phone to his ear again. It’s quiet for two beats before his face contorts in anger. “Where is he?” He spits.

                                     ......TO BE CONTINUED......

(Next Chapter)

Tag List: @jesllianaquilesrolonsworld @okayiamkassandra @fablesrose @ada--44 @bonkydarnes @star-yawnznn @crazyunsexycool @onlyangel-444 @seninjakitey @mystic-mara @mxltifxndom @stilesxreid @chaotic-luvrs @tiggytaylor @deanwasscaredbyacat @imaginexred @daisychaingirl @yasmin12312 @squishytap @i-am-fckn-sleep-deprived @wecangetlostinthepurplerain

[hehehereliesmysanity]

Champagne

Wille and Simon are best friends and Wille comes up with the brilliant idea to do a fake proposal for free champagne served for the newly-engaged couples in fancy restaurants. Wille gets up from the table and gets down on one knee with the cheap prop ring he got from the dollar store and proposes to his best friend Simon and every customer erupts with joy, cheering for them. Simon theatrically gasps with one hand over his mouth for the dramatic effect and says yes. Of course he does because that's the ruse. And then they share a brief close-mouthed kiss just like they agreed before. The waiter comes back with the free champagne and everybody is happy.

Except Wille feels different than a few minutes ago. Different than the reality where he didn't kiss his best friend and felt Simon's warm lips on his. He feels the electricity coursing through in his veins but that's probably because he is straight and he has never kissed a man before.

They keep doing the ruse a couple of times more. Each time something is different. Each time the kiss is getting longer. And one time there was tongue. And the other times after that. It is for free champagne and nothing more.

A year later, Wille gets down on one knee and produces a ring box in a crowded fancy restaurant. Simon laughs heartily at him.

"Baby, I think we are already past that point." he chuckles. "We don't have to fake propose to find an excuse to kiss each other now."

"This is not fake." Wille says instead.

That is when they get free champagne for the last time.

[sanzodaily]

day 6 | its the thought that counts.

[cobaltfluff]

happy april fools' from your big brothers, dumbass (affectionate)

[crustycrackhead]

Heights for my Dungeon Meshi AU Life Series + Stampy Cat cuz why not

(Niche shit that I enjoy)

[ducktollers]

every time i see someone online say they want mary jane watson in spiderman 4 even though michelle jones watson already exists i get so mad that i cook enough of my neurons to lose a year off my life

[californiaquail]

the other day we had a dog come in that very clearly did not want to be alive anymore and was completely checked out of existence and wouldn't even walk we had to stretcher it in and out on a towel. anyway the owners main concern was its arthritis ? but he thought carprofen had made the dog "crazy" before....so boss took some rads and labs and said ok you can try librela if you want....coworker and i both felt he did not impress strongly enough upon this man that his dog was literally and obviously dying. so he gave the librela and then the dog died the next day. so then i was overhearing today how he had to report it to the relevant authorities as a possible librela reaction. bad timing as everyone is currently freaking out about librela killing their dogs (btw boss opinion on that is basically that it's been given to so many thousands of animals that there's bound to be such cases where correlation ≠ causation). anyway the moral of the story is please do not force your animals to die of natural causes it is almost never anything but awful.

[closedrop]

I drew this with a mouse, be amazed tumblr users!

As a nice bonus I shall also include some goofy Vash images

[davy-zeppeli]

back at it again with my better half x

[squeeb100]

Oops i accidentally played totk until midnight again

[vampiiric]

i think skwisgaar experimented with gender but never unlocked cis+. nathan is cis but comfortable in it and willing to call out bullshit. murderface is nonbinary but hasnt realized it yet. pickles and toki are both FTM and only charles knows. neither of them knows the other is.

[synthetic-sonata]

its awesome being into a thing with a small cult(??? ig) following but it also means if you dont like someone's characterization you can outright talk about it or else youll be a dick . Except almost everyone has bad characterization of your favorite character and you're about to kill someone

[missdynamighttt]

↳ ❝ THERE'S NO ONE LIKE YOU, SWEETS. ❞

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ synopsis: in which, you make what feels like the worst decision of your life—getting into a hot tub with your fake boyfriend, katsuki bakugou.

starring: fake boyfriend! katsuki bakugou x oblivious! reader ⍣ ೋ

disclaimers!: fake established relationship, prefers ass, humping/ grinding, a little degradation, fingering, oral sex (f! receiving), sexual stuff in water

note: pro hero! katsuki drabble, usage of "woman", "sweets" "baby", "slut", fem reader, fake relationship trope, inspired by to all the boys ive loved before hot tub/ jacuzzi scene. I KNOW I HAVE A POLL, I PROMISE ILL GET TO THAT, JUST NEEDED TO GET THIS OFF OF MY CHEST💜💜

╰┈➤ ❝ [this is so stupid...] ❞ you mumble, walking down the hallway to the pool area, your arms crossed as the cold winter breeze hits your skin.

somehow, kirishima talked you into confronting your 'boyfriend', katsuki bakugou, after he started ignoring you in the class 1A ski-trip/christmas party this year.

"c'mon, girl, hes probably waiting for you in the hot tub 'nyway. get in there, and get him!"

it was only supposed to be a fake arrangement between you two. to be honest, you're not even sure why hes mad. but he was.

the hand-holding, hugs and kisses started to feel too real, the closeness felt too intimate. it was all getting in your head so you distanced yourself from him, sitting next to ochako in the bus instead of katsuki.

katsuki needed to get his ranks up in the charts and you needed publicity. that was all there was to it. supposed to be, anyway.

you reach the pool area and thats when you see him. katsuki bakugo. in the hot tub. shirtless. and in swimming trunks. he's lounging with his eyes shut and eyebrows furrowed, letting the heat and jets of the tub ease his muscles.

you catch your bottom lip between your teeth. you draw closer to the hot tub, perching yourself on the ledge across from katsuki, not getting in the water because you had a night gown on. for now.

though his eyes are closed, a slight shift in his demeanor reveals that he's aware of your presence. even in his attempt to maintain a façade of calm, the subtle tension in his shoulders and the tightening of his jaw betray his awareness of you.

"katsuki?" you tilt your head, trying to get his attention.

when he doesn't respond, you scoff, crossing your arms.

"wow, katsuki, real mature."

his eyebrow twitches at the comment on his maturity, his eyes flutter open. he looks at you with an unimpressed stare, his expression a mix of annoyance and... something else.

"oh, because you're a real shinin' example of maturity," he retorts, his voice tinged with sarcasm.

you frown at him. "seriously, why are you mad at me? and don't go yappin' about how you're not mad, i can tell."

"why do you think?" he grumbles, unable to meet your eyes as his cheeks tinged pink.

"...you've been hangin' around with round cheeks all fuckin' day."

that was all he was mad about? is he.. no. he couldn't be jealous. he had no reason to.

"that... that shouldn't matter."

"well, it does matter, goddamn it," he mutters angrily as his scowl deepens, his jaw clenching in frustration.

"you don't get it, do you? you're my girlfriend, you were supposed to sit with me."

"fake girlfriend-"

"i don't give a flyin' fuck. you're still my girlfriend, woman, fake or not. i expected you to sit with me. and instead, what do i see? you hangin' out with fuckin..."

he lets out an exasperated sigh, raking a hand through his wet hair. he looks like he's trying to find the right words to express his feelings without coming across as too jealous or vulnerable.

"fuck. fuck, i'm... i'm not tryna control you, okay? but it bugs the shit out of me. it bugs me that you were hanging with round face. it bugs me that you sat next to her instead of me."

katsuki's gaze softens at your quiet, conflicted expression. he sighs again, his eyes briefly darting away from you before he continues.

"i... i even brought your damn favorite snacks in case you got hungry," he mutters, his voice tinged with embarrassment. "i thought, we could have sat together and, you know..."

you look up at him, a hint of surprise widening your eyes. you contemplate how to continue, trying to lighten the mood with a soft smile. "do you... still have some left over?"

katsuki scoffs at the attempt to change the mood, but can't help the brief spark of amusement that flickers in his eyes.

"no, obviously," he replies with a roll of his eyes. "i ate some and gave kirishima the rest after you decided to ditch me."

"rude."

"damn right, it was rude. tch, ditchin' me like that."

you let out a soft chuckle, shaking your head, looking at him with a soft gaze. "i'm.. i'm sorry i didn't sit next to you."

katsuki's ears turned slightly pink as he hears your apology. he glances at you hesitantly before looking away again, trying to maintain his aloof demeanor.

"yeah, well, apology accepted, i guess," he mutters, his voice lacking its usual sharpness.

you nod, feeling a mix of nervousness and excitement. after a brief moment of silence, you gather your courage and shed your nightgown, revealing your bare skin as you slowly step into the warm embrace of the hot tub.

katsuki's eyes widen as you stripped, his heart rate speeding up at the sight of you in just a pair of black bra and panties. his eyes roam over your body greedily, taking in every curve and contour.

he clears his throat, his gaze is fixed on your figure as you step into the hot tub, the warm water enveloping you. he tries to keep his thoughts in check, but the sight of you like this, almost naked, is making it incredibly hard (like his dick).

"damn..." he mutters, his voice barely above a whisper. "what are you doing to me, sweets?"

you look at him with eyebrows raised, a soft smile formed on your lips. "hm?"

he takes a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. the water laps around you two, creating a sense of intimacy, and it only adds to the tension.

"seriously, do you have to look like that right now?"

"like what?"

"like... that," his voice is hoarse, gesturing vaguely at your form. "like you're tryna drive me crazy."

katsuki reaches out, his hand hovering just above your torso before finally making contact, his fingers gently carressing the curve of your waist. his hand felt so warm, almost competing with the heat in his eyes now mixed with his raw desire for you.

"damn it, woman. you're killin' me here..."

"can i apologize for that too?"

"i'll forgive you... under one condition," he murmurs, his voice a low, gravelly rumble. his hand slowly roams over your bare skin, exploring your body with a newfound confidence.

he pulls you closer, the water sloshing around you as he guides you onto his lap. his arms encircle your waist firmly, every contour and dip of your bodies fitting perfectly against each other. the corners of his mouth tug to a grin."sit here for me."

your eyes widen in surprise as you feel a rush of heat across your cheeks. you could feel his hot, raging boner, pressing up against your cunt through the thin, pathetic fabric you call panties.

a cheeky grin spreads across your face. "katsuki, is that...?"

he groans, his voice low and gruff with frustrated desire. "just shut the fuck up, sweets."

his hands grip your hips, fingers digging into your skin as he pulls you nearer, his lips crashing against yours in a heated, hungry kiss. his tongue dances with yours, greedy and demanding.

the kiss was intense, filled with pent-up longing and need and so much words both of you couldn't say.

he keeps you trapped against his body with his arms in the hot tub, his touch both tender and possessive.

"such a nice fuckin' ass.." he whispers, groping and massaging your doughy ass before pulling you back in for a deeper kiss.

your arms are wrapped around his neck, your fingers tangled in his hair as you grind on his hard-on, a little embarassed as you feel your panties dampen more from the water and your slick but can't help but want him. need him.

"fuck," he groans, feeling his cock get so painfully hard just from you humping him. "you little.."

your breath hitches when you felt his hand slide down your inner thigh, tugging the pathetic g-string to the side. he enters a finger inside of you, seperating your folds, feeling your warm pussy and your wet slick in the midst of the water. "k-katsuki-"

"aww, this all for me, sweets?" he coos, watching you whimper as he rubs your aching clit.

you pout as you grind against his hand, desperate for friction. your teeth sink into your lip as he put a second finger, your eyes glistening with a mixture of desire and greed. "so what if it is..?"

"that fucking eager for me, huh?" he chuckles darkly, his fingers enveloped by the warmth of your pussy as he curls them inside of you. "gonna take it all for me, yeah?"

you nodded, clinging onto him like a lifeline, whimpering and mewling choked versions of his name. "fuck, fuck.. kat- katsu.. katsuki..."

katsuki groans at the sound of his name on your lips, his hand your hips grip you tighter, pulling you closer, while curling his thick digits against your sensitive spots, the sound of your lewd noises music to his ears.

"see my fingers fuckin' you, baby?" he mutters, his lips find your neck, trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses along your tender skin. "only i can make your pretty pussy feel this good, yeah?"

"mhm," you manage. despite the embarrassment, you can't help but give in to the heat building between you.

his eyes lock onto yours, his voice sultry and mean. "you know, you're such a fuckin' slut. lettin' me finger you like this where anyone can see us."

a loud moan escapes your lips as your pussy clenches around his fingers at the name. you couldn't help it. fuck, he was so, so mean. and you fucking loved it.

a cocky grin spreads across his face, letting out a low chuckle. "oh? you like it when i call you a slut?" he taunts, bringing a grin to his face at your reaction. "can't believe you're into that shit, sweets."

"it's your fault- fuck.."

"oh? blamin' me now?" he taunts, a cocky expression on his face. "thought you were more.. mature than that."

katsuki flaps his fingers faster inside of you, abandoning the slow, careful pace of curling he did earlier. your slick and the hot tub water moistens his fingers, yet you can still smell the faint hit of your cunt.

"katsukiii! fuck, fuck, fuck. too much, too much..."

"just look at you, sweets. takin' my fingers like a champ, such a good fuckin' girl," he coos, his filthy praises making your pussy clench around his fingers.

"bet you wanted this as much as i did, did you?"

"n-no-"

"bullshit. if you don't, tell me to stop right now."

"sh-shit, no.. don't stop, please.. please, i need you.."

"that's what i thought," his grin widens, his hand that had been resting on your hip moves lower, tapping your leg gently. "lift your hips up for me."

with a nod, you comply, the water rippling around you as it drips out of your legs, katsuki finally seeing your sweet little cunt without the transluscent filter of the water. his grip on your thigh tightens slightly, letting out a shaky exhale as he rubs your clit.

"you close, sweets?" he glances up at you, his eyes meeting yours, feeling you nod before he leans in for a long, lingering kiss.

"cum on my face, 'kay?" he utters softly after pulling away, leaning down on your sweet cunt before lapping his tongue away at your aching slit while still pumping his fingers full of you.

his tongue felt so good. he felt so good, it hurts. all you could smell was the intoxicating scent of your cunt and katsuki's saliva sloshed together.

"katsuki..." you can't help but let out a lewd mewl, whimpering as wave after wave of pleasure courses through your body.

"there's no one like you, sweets," katsuki groans into your pussy, the loud sounds he was making as he ate you out while he fucked his fingers into you was just so lewd. when it felt so good. when anyone could catch you doing this. "cum on my face, baby, c'mon.."

you shudder from the pleasure from his touch as you feel your release, chest heaving up and down as you catch your breath. though, his tongue kept flicking at your clit, pumping his fingers in and out of you as you ride your high.

your post-nut clarity kicks in. fuck, you just.. let katsuki bakugo, your fake boyfriend, not only finger you but you let him eat you out. it doesn't matter you were into him. he was still your fake boyfriend.

and not just anywhere, no. but in the damn hot tub. where anyone could've seen you. the worst part? you enjoyed it to your core.

before you can think loudly again, you feel his lips brush gently against your cheek. you turn to look at him, a little surprised at the sudden show of tenderness after the heated moment as your eyes meet. you take in the disheveled sight of him, his hair damp and wet as he catches his breath, your mind still trying to catch up to the events of tonight.

"sweets... my room. now. please."

‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia! ]✧˚₊‧ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧

⋆˚࿔ kia's note ˚⋆ should i do part 2 guys lmaolmao hope you enjoyed 💜💜

[timmydraker]

Tim creating his own quiz that is painstakingly detailed on each member of the family with several different answers for each question.

It’s called:

What Gotham Cryptid Are you?

He publishes it under a name he got from a random username generator and then sends it to his family, telling them he found it and thought it would be funny to see who got what.

Bruce actually gets Batman, which isn’t that shocking when thought about.

Dick also gets himself but they’re the only ones.

Barbara gets BatWoman and immediately text Kate to show her with genuine pride.

Jason gets Damian and is pissed about it until he finds out people see Damian as super cool cause he has a sword, so it’s not too bad and better than getting sick or Bruce.

Tim gets himself but only because it’s literally rigged, so he doesn’t count it in his accuracy chart.

Steph gets Orphan/Batgirl and is estatic to tell her best friend as such.

Cass gets Nightwing to everyone surprise but the woman herself just smiles happily.

Kate gets Batman and throws a fit because Batwoman is better in every way and ‘obviously the stupid quiz is wrong’.

Duke gets a strange one that is called ‘OG Robin’s’ and seemingly describes both Dick and Jason in it but shrugs it off and is instead happy he got such a positive answer.

Damian genuinely starts tweaking when he gets Red Robin, throwing a fit and saying it’s stupid and wrong.

It’s then that Tim confesses he made it and that they themselves contributed to most of the choices in it. There’s some outrage, but most of them find it either amusing or enlightening.

Damian of course claims that Tim had just proven he rigged it so that he would get ‘the worst Robin’.

Alfred would later see him staring at the screenshot of the quiz result with a look of disbelieving pride on his face.

Bonus:

Alfred got Bat Cow and told absolutely nobody because it never happened.

Got it?

Never happened.

[hhoonii]

⋅˚₊‧ ଳ WHEN + WHY ENHYPEN STARTED LIKING THEIR IDOL! S/O

pairing: idol!enhypen x fem idol!reader, genre: fluff, requested!! enha realizing they're down bad

— heeseung

when he saw you perform

he was absolutely stunned by your stage presence. you carried yourself with so much confidence that it was hard to not notice you. the way your hair swayed in the air whenever you moved and the way your lips curved into a smile did things to him more than he liked to admit. after finding out your name, he was guilty of looking you up on google and stalking your instagram. the members would hear him giggling, and they would instantly know it was because he was watching videos of you.

— jay

when both of you appeared on a variety show together

it just so happened that you two had to be paired up for the whole episode. literally. connected by a bracelet, you had to walk, eat, do missions— everything together. he didn’t think much about it at first, but he found himself smiling when he saw you skip so excitedly, dragging him with you. and when you wiped the bit of pasta sauce off his lips, his heart started beating a little faster. your chemistry with him was off the charts, and all he wished was for your on-screen romance to become a reality.

— jake

when you filmed a tiktok together

he thought you were cute trying to learn the choreo for “XO”. you couldn’t quite get the hand movements right, prompting him to gently touch and guide your hands. maybe it was the close proximity, the warmth of your hands, or the way your eyes met, but there was this unexplainable tension that filled the room. he quickly looked away, hoping you didn’t see the creeping blush on his face. although the filming went smoothly, he kept replaying those moments with you in his head.

— sunghoon

when both of you were special mcs

seeing how pretty you are up close made something spark in his heart. he kept stealing glances at you while you were practicing your lines. he chuckled at the slight pout you would make when you made a mistake, which you playfully glared at him for. the first thing he did after the show was look on social media to see if fans captured any cute moments between you two. normally idols want to avoid being shipped with other idols, but the idea didn't sound too bad to him if it was with you.

— sunoo

when he saw you with another male idol

you two have been close friends since childhood. your friendship was well known in the industry, and strictly platonic. it wasn’t until he saw you talking and laughing with another male idol that he started to feel a little jealous. that guy didn’t know what makes you laugh most, nor your deepest secrets like he did. and why was he leaning so close to you? he wanted to brush his feelings aside, but imagining you with someone else didn’t sit right with him...

— jungwon

when he saw you practicing

back in his pre-debut days, you were his sworn enemy. you two competed for the top trainee spot, always trying to one up each other. after both of you debuted, one day he peered into your practice room window, but something felt wrong. watching you as an idol made him suddenly see you in a different light. your messy hair no longer looked stupid, but rather hot. your annoying voice was now something that made him feel giddy just hearing it. he could deny it as much as he wanted to, but the heart never lies.

— ni-ki

when you did a collab stage together

he was already aware you were one of the best dancers in the idol industry, so he looked forward to working with you. but what impressed him was how you were so kind to him, always looking after him and complimenting him. he remained calm up until the choreography that required your faces to be mere centimeters apart. you had to be in his arms, maintaining eye contact, but he couldn’t look at you without internally panicking. you were attractive, and he wondered how one could be so perfect inside and out.

[elssero]

bakugo would be the type of dad who for the life of him cannot say no to his little girl.

k.bakugo

♰ girldad ! bakugo fluff <333

he never imagined himself as a family man, he’d always had the idea that he’d work his ass off for number one and just.. do that forever?

he kept that mindset right up until he met you. pretty little thing with a mouth just as snappy as his and that was all it took for him to be whipped.

to say you swept him of his feet would be an understatement. he physically bumped into you in his agency building and in return you raised your voice at him and told him to watch where the fuck he’s going.

the rest is certainly history, he chases after you and you let him. much to his delight your married a mere 3 years later, laughing at the stupidity of your first meeting.

when discussing children you decide on one for now, bakugo grew up and only child and he quite enjoyed being the center of his parents attention, he only wishes the same for his own.

your pregnant in no time, thanks to his… persistent efforts and he can’t contain the love he has for you as you begin to swell. he completely dotes on you.

your hungry? a three course meal is on its way. your sleepy? he’s carrying you bridal style, laying you down in bed and tucking you in. you deserve only best in his eyes, just as his little girl will.

he doesn’t leave you or the baby’s side for weeks after the birth, your begging him to go back to work at this point because kirishima cannot work another 16 hour shift to cover for him.

he hates every minute he spends away from you, it’s spent grumbling about how he’d much rather be curled up in bed with you. he drops in the charts the first year the child is born but he doesn’t care, he can’t care, not when he’s coming home to you- his beautiful wife and his pride and joy of a baby girl.

as the kid gets older he starts working full time again, you too go back to work a couple days a week while your child’s at school, he insists that you don’t- he takes good enough care of you right?? but you do it anyway, it’s more for something to do rather than for the income.

now spending more time away from his kid- the time he does spend with her he cherishes every minute, they’re baking cookies, he’s taking her shopping, he’s spoiling her rotten :(.

she feels a little sick and wants to stay off school? suddenly they’re both begging you to let her stay off and when you finally agree- he’s calling into work saying he can’t make it so they can spend the day together.

he helps her with quirk training when she insists she wants to be a hero just like daddy. he cries the first time he hears it, unable to control the surge of joy he feels seeing his kids face looking up at him with admiration.

he takes her into the agency to meet all her favorite pro heros- he sets up play dates with his friends kids so his little angel can grow up around kids her age.

as she grows he makes sure that they never lose their closeness- he promises her that she can tell him anything and she does, she truely the light of his life.

it’s the last year of middle school for his girl when he gets the phone call he’s been dreading for years- she got into a fight today in school, a serious one too it seems and he’s rushing as fast as he possibly can, he doesn’t even take the time to phone you because he’s so worried, he makes a mental note to call you the second he’s out of the place.

he bursts through the door and he can’t help the sigh of relief he lets out when he sees that she’s okay, infact she’s not ruffed up at all- which only makes him more worried. had his kid been the one to start the fight? his little angel?

the principal explains the situation pretty clearly, the other kid involved admitted that they had been purposely attempting to get under her skin- using his name to do it.

he’s furious of course- but he can’t help overwhelming happiness that bubbles in his throat when he realises this is your first fight- a fight that you had only started to protect his name.

he thanks the principal for his time and escorts his kid out, she’s silent the entire walk back to the car while he fights back a smirk- “are you mad at me?” she looks up at him from her place in the passenger seat and he just bursts into a smile-

“let’s go get some ice cream kid- just don’t tell your mother about this alright?”