#but the other was incredible and so fun toget to

[squeeb100]

Oops i accidentally played totk until midnight again

[mecachrome]

okay but armed with the knowledge that you love pokemon even more than i do...... which pokemon do you think landoscar would be???????????? (or alex for that matter?????? or any of the other drivers you feel like thinking up pokemon versions for????????) 👀👀👀👀👀

omggg first of all i must show you this absolutely incredible fanart from aphrostiel because komala is the most obvious option for oscar!!! but imo there are several ways to approach this... i'm not that big of an astrology guy but the fact that oscar is fire sun / earth moon and lando is water sun / earth moon has had a chokehold on me since forever (read: since i wanted to draw atla au a few months ago) (something something contrasting external characters but identical inner selves?!?!) so following that it'd be fun to give oscar a fire type and lando a water type. but at the same time i like something coastal for oscar... or one that can learn SURF

equally i will never tire of bunnydoling ojp so scorbunny is another option... why do i feel like oscar just fits a lot of starters in general TT__TT also i've already wooper-coded robo because he's Polite Cat but obviously so is oscar so i could give him paldean wooper (< guy who has a huge clodsire plushie) or even DITTO 💜 it's about the adaptability... or dachsbun if you want to lean into the pastryisms LOL. ok sorry i'm losing the plot

for lando i will so generously give him my other fav gen ix and simply one of my fav pokes of all time aka miss TINKATON 💕 (also guy who has a tinkaton plushie) but additionally kind of partial to jolteon & skitty & mawile...???

omfggg just thought of 814 as PLUSLE AND MINUN!!! 💙❤️ give me a second i need to go make something........... ok. do you hate them be honest 🥺

anyway whom else... alex dewgong & togetic & sobble? sharl rapidash? george glaceon perhaps... or polteageist if you want to get a little silly with it. pgasly gastly LOL jkjk it's mf fantominus in french anyway. also just laughed at the thought of sainz jr fuecoco 😭 sorry he can be blaziken... nando sirfetch'd for SURE tho. and i love mantine and dragapult for macks fsr :')

ALSO only marginally related but on the recent topic of twitch streamer aus i feel like we need to branch out in terms of the nerdy shit fictional oscar piastri would get up to... for ex i once watched a multi-hour stream of pkmn vgc legend park sejun shiny hunting pachirisu. that could be you @ oscar piastri!!!

omg actually you know who would be perfect for pachi... YUKI. ok sorry for the long ass answer haksdfh why did i get so into this 😔

[luki-fanfic]

Helluva Boss 5: The Harvest Moon Festival

Huh, Helluva Boss usually drops by mid month. Wonder why this episode is taking so long to put toget-

*Episode airs*

0_0

Oh. That’s why.

I’ll admit it, my interest in HB was waning. Episode 3 and 4 honestly didn’t do much to keep me interested. Spring Broken had a lot of plot and writing issues, and I felt the concept could have been better executed. C.H.E.R.U.B was more solid, but did have some issues, and just wasn’t that fun to watch.

Harvest Moon on the other hand? Oh boy, now there’s an episode. I am, if you’ll pardon the pun, back on this horse. World building, the action scenes, incredible animation, relationship development of the bad kind, more worlds, interesting characters! It gives us so much to work with.

Spoilers abound, so read carefully.

That said, I will start this with my biggest complaint – and it’s one I’ve had for several episodes, but this one really rammed it home due to the ‘sneak peak’ clip we had of the opening. In the black and white boards, the swearing was limited, and honestly the writing was pretty witty. Then we got the finished product – certain lines were missing, and several words had been replaced with random swearing. Considering what the scene was, it felt like the finished product was a step down – I really wish the scriptwriters would realise random swearing isn’t always funny, and they’ve given proof that their writing is snappy as is.

Anyway...onto the actual episode. We learn that I.M.P seems to be building up their business as Blitzø has 15 clients looking for a kill. Considering he had to do a sale to get a multiple kill, and the other episodes show him basically going out straight after getting the job, they’re clearly building up a name for themselves.

This is further shown with the arrival of Striker, who compliments his decision to go into business for himself, since most Imps don’t. This is new information, since we’ve seen Wally attempt to start his own business – although clearly it wasn’t going well – but if Striker is to be believed, most companies in Hell, even Imp City, don’t have Imps as the owners. Maybe it’s a financial capital thing, maybe it’s partially Hell’s racism, or maybe Imps just generally prefer to follow, which Striker seems to allude later. It’s hard to say with the information we’ve got at this point, but it does put I.M.P in a slightly different light – and probably explains why Blitzø is fairly incompetent when it comes to running the whole thing. He has literally no one to ask or use as an example, and the society he lives in generally assumes he’s going to fail by the nature of him being an Imp.

In fact, even though Blitzø owns I.M.P, he is still completely dependent on Stolas and his Grimoire. Without it, I.M.P is screwed – the reason they’re even at the Harvest Festival is because they can’t work. And that’s what Striker tells him in the final act. Their society has made sure that he can never truly be successful on his own merit, no matter how hard he tries.

I’ve seen some debate on whether what Striker told Blitzø was true or just an attempt to let his guard down. It’s hard to say, because Striker says and does some very conflicting things, but I’m going to believe it was genuine. Why?

He lets Millie and Moxxie live to have leverage over him. He does insult Blitzø to their faces, but why would he need leverage once his job was done?

When Moxxie learns the truth, he doesn’t even try to talk him round, just kill him. Millie is also tossed to the side – possibly because neither of them are ‘superior.' Blitzø gets a full on speech about their superiority and how much he respects him, even if he’s hiding a knife in his tail for if he can’t talk him round.

When he has Blitzø on the ground at his mercy, he doesn’t mock him. Instead, he tells him he genuinely thought they’d be a good team. He had the advantage, but doesn’t take the chance to continue the insult.

Like most Imps, Striker seems to dislike the demon royalty, but at the end of the day, is also working for one (and can I say that twist was brilliantly well done? It made SO much sense but I honestly didn’t see it coming). What is his end goal? Is he envious that Blitzø has some kind of power of Stolas while he has to be obedient? Is he aiming to kill Stella once Stolas is down? Maybe opening an assassination business to take out anything Overlord and above? We just don’t know.

And with that, we’ll step off this train of thought to speak about something else very important in this episode. Stolas. Specifically his relationship with Blitzø, and precisely how wrong it is.

I admit it, I future-shipped them, especially thanks to the Instagram (which become a bit of a bait and switch when the insta-accounts were declared ‘non-canon’). I acknowledged that the relationship was problematic and needed some serious work on both sides before it could really be a functioning relationship, but this episode hammered home exactly how much needs to happen in a way the other episodes didn’t. The pilot and Murder Family treated Stolas as a gag, and then Loo Loo Land made us all care about him and his actions. But Harvest Moon showed the other side of it, and I'm not sure the ship can realistically recover.

Stolas considers Imps as inferior, to a ridiculous degree, and Blitzø is no exception. He has absolutely no respect for Blitzø, and holds all the power in the relationship. We saw this a little in the previous episodes, but they were either alone, or Blitzø was working for him, and surrounded by people aware of the relationship. His actions could be somewhat explained away.

In Harvest Moon, Stolas proves he treats Blitzø this way even in public. Blitzø has very obvious issues regarding his name, so Stolas persistently using a nickname and treating him the way he does around people who aren’t aware, says a lot about how much Stolas doesn’t care about Blitzø’s opinions. Even if Blitzø does have some feelings for him – which I do suspect due to his panicked attempt to explain it as transactional. If he didn’t care, he would probably find it easier to explain. At the same time though, he’d be happier if he could get the book without the monthly visits, because what he has with Stolas isn’t a relationship, no matter what Stolas tries to pretend. Any feelings Blitzø develops puts him even further under his control.

Part of me wonders if the relationship evolved between the pilot and the first episode in planning, and that’s why we have such a disconnect between the Insta relationship and the canon one. I’m really hoping the series addresses it in the future.

Finally, lets talk about that final reveal. Stella has hired a hitman to kill Stolas – even armed him with two angel-tech guns.

(Which, also finally gives us confirmation that Imps/Hellhounds/Succubi can die from conventional weapons, but the higher ranked native demons need angel weaponry to off them).

Stella is also confident enough to scream it over the dinner table. Stolas either doesn’t care, or isn’t paying attention – if he doesn’t care, if definitely puts his motives regarding the original invite up in the air, but if he isn’t paying attention? Then it’s another point in the anti-Stolas tab.

That said, this scenario does ask a question. Why don’t these two divorce? Stolas is clearly not in love any more, and living together clearly isn’t doing Octavia’s mental health any favours if she’s literally hiding behind her music rather than interact with her parents. He should be the first to offer a divorce, but he hasn’t brought it up. And if he hasn’t, maybe the reason Stella hasn’t is because they can’t?

It’s generally assumed that the two of them have an arranged marriage, and that Stella’s anger at his relationship with Blitzø is due to his status more than the cheating. But then wouldn’t it make more sense to hire a hitman to kill Blitzø rather than Stolas? Choosing to kill Stolas, even if it would hurt Octavia, suggests it’s the only option left to her.

I’m guessing we’ll (finally) get some Stella development next time Striker appears, and get an idea of what makes her tick. But for now, I suspect the two of them regularly had lovers on the side, but kept it discreet until this point. Stolas refusing to keep his relationship with Blitzø quiet is causing untold damage to their name and status. Stella wants rid of a man who not only doesn’t love her (if he ever did), but is constantly humiliating her for not hiding his much lower class lover (which we know by this episode he doesn’t even attempt), and since the rules of Hell for demons of their status doesn’t allow divorce (or perhaps their arrangement doesn’t), assassination it is.

Hell, maybe the plan was to kill Stolas, and frame Blitzø for it. Striker clearly knew about their relationship before they met (which should have been a red flag now that I thing about it), so Stella probably mentioned him. It would also put the recruiting on another level, if Striker actually did get Blitzø involved at the final moment and teamed up.

Oh, and as a final amendment? If that angel-gun that Striker left behind is not now in the hands of I.M.P and becomes a key piece when Asmodeus, Mammon and the real Fizzarolli show up? I will be very disappointed.

[spine-buster]

The President Wears Prada (William Nylander | Chapter 19

A/N:  IT’S VALENTINE’S DAY BITCHES!!!!!

February 14th, 2020

Aberdeen Bloom was packing her tote bag.  

Thankfully, the team had Valentine’s Day off.  Over the past few weeks she’d heard the guys talking about their plans with their wives or girlfriends.  John and Aryne were getting John’s parents to watch Jace while they went for dinner in Yorkville.  Morgan was bringing Bee to Alo for dinner, in his crutches and all – he wasn’t letting his injury stop him.  Jason was going to buy his girls each a bouquet of flowers and have a special night in with them and Jennifer.  It all sounded very sweet, and she was happy that, after missing New Year’s with their families, they were at least able to have Valentine’s Day together.  

Evan was coming over tonight and Kasha was cooking him a romantic dinner, so Aberdeen had decided she was going to camp out at her local Starbucks with her laptop and notebooks and work on her writing.  It was when she was almost finished packing her tote bag did a text come through on her phone. 

can u be ready in 15 mins?

Between William and Brendan, she’d just about had it with hockey players telling her to get ready in an absurdly short amount of time.

Why?

did u really think we wouldn’t celebrate valentines minskatt?

She almost dropped her phone on the floor.  She had no clue what he was thinking.  Clearly he wasn’t.

I don’t know what the custom in Sweden is, but usually you tell a girl if you’re going out on Valentine’s Day so she can look pretty

what’s the fun in that when i can surprise u with something plus u always look pretty its impossible for u not to

What if I already made plans?

Less than ten seconds later, her phone began ringing.  She snorted before she picked up.  “Hi.”

“You don’t really have plans, do you?” he asked, worry in his voice.

She looked at her notebook sitting on her bed, the one she was supposed to have packed into her tote bag before leaving for Starbucks.  Where she should be drinking coffee and writing.  Exactly like the stereotype.  “Evan’s coming over.  I was supposed to go to Starbucks and write,” she informed him.

William knew how seriously Aberdeen took her writing ever since she’d read a lot of it to him during their days alone during the All-Star Break, so he was genuinely worried.  “Do you think you can spare a few hours for a Valentine’s Day date?  I’m like two minutes from your place,” he said.  “But, uh, no pressure.  I mean if you want to write, you can go write.”

Aberdeen smiled, though she couldn’t see him.  His anxiety was a bit cute, she had to admit.  This was the first time in her life, she thought, that she made a boy nervous.  The last time she’d tried to use writing as an excuse not to go out, Zane got annoyed and pouty and forced her out to his friend’s birthday party where she had the worst time.  “I’ll meet you downstairs,” she said quickly before hanging up.

By the time the elevator took her down to the lobby, she saw William’s Volvo already waiting for her in front of the lobby doors.  She slipped into the passenger’s seat quickly, closing the door and immediately noticing how already hot and cozy it was in the car.  She looked over to William.  “Hi,” she smiled shyly.

“Hi minskatt,” he smiled too, a soft, confident smile on his face.  “You look beautiful.”

“Stop trying to butter me up.”

He leaned over the centre console and placed a kiss on her lips.  It was supposed to be chaste – supposed to be – but he should have known better, because once his lips were on hers it was endgame for him, and he kept kissing her and deepening the kiss for as long as she’d let him.  When she pulled away, she was smiling.  “Where are we going?” she asked.

“It’s a surprise.”

“Willy.”

He reached over and grabbed her hand, pulling it over to his lap.  “You’ll see, minskatt.”

Aberdeen digressed.  He put his car into drive and turned the corner to rejoin Adelaide Street.  He grabbed his phone carefully from the cupholder and handed it to her.  “Want to play some music?” he asked.  

Aberdeen arched her brow.  She took the phone from his hands and began scrolling through his Spotify.  During the All-Star Break, she’d added more songs to his “Minskatt” playlist, and they’d listened it as they sat around the apartment, or cooked, or did whatever it was they did for those three days – which was basically just eat and have sex.  She noticed a couple of songs had been added by him since then, too: ‘Ageless Beauty’ by Stars, ‘Cold Feet’ by Loud Luxury, ‘Honest’ by The Band CAMINO.  They all suited her and her taste in music so well.

But she had ulterior motives.

William waited patiently for a song to begin as he drove through the streets.  Every time he glanced over at Aberdeen, he saw her smirk getting bigger and bigger.  “What are you up to over there?” he asked.  “Are you destroying the playlist again?”

Aberdeen giggled and tapped the screen dramatically.  She waited.

When the opening notes of ‘Passionfruit’ began to play, William’s jaw dropped dramatically as Aberdeen burst into a fit of laughter at his reaction.  “What the hell is this?!” he demanded playfully.  “You roast me about my choice and now you play it?!”

“I never said it was a bad song,” she said through giggles.

“You are something else,” he said, pausing dramatically between the two words as he reached over and tried to pinch her on her thigh playfully.  She yelped but continued to laugh, grabbing his hand and holding it hers, like she was holding a baby bird.  “No extra meatball for you.”

Her eyes lit up at the mention of a meatball.  “Sugo meatballs?”

“No,” he shook his head, bringing his car to a stop at the red light.  He looked over at her.  “San Remo Bakery meatballs.”

She gasped dramatically.  “Willy, we’re going to San Remo?”

“Mhm,” he nodded his head.  The famous bakery in Etobicoke clearly had her heart, and he knew it would.  It was the first thing he thought of when he was planning tonight.  “You’re gonna get us whatever’s good and we’re gonna eat.”

Aberdeen wiggled excitedly in her seat.  She controlled the playlist and songs as William made his way to Etobicoke the long way – aka, not taking the highway.  He was perfectly content with taking King Street and The Queensway the entire way there while maintaining easy, fun, and interesting conversation with Aberdeen, who was suddenly full of stories of other Etobicoke establishments she’d haunt during her high school days.  She told stories of she and her friends packing themselves into a car to drive to San Remo Bakery in grade 12, making it back just in time for their afternoon class but smelling like freshly baked bread in the process.  She told stories of running through the streets of The Kingsway neighbourhood throughout university when she would go on jogs to clear her head.  She told stories of hiking along the Humber Marshes with her dad and traditional afternoon tea at the Old Mill with her mom and taking the subway back home to Royal York station after nights out with her friends in university.  She’d memorized the train schedule and knew that the last train going westbound left at 1:52am.  For all that she went out, she’d only ended up taking a taxi back home three times.

After every story, William would kiss her hand.  

When they were on Royal York Road, Aberdeen became silent as she looked at all the storefronts on the way to the bakery.  The sun was just starting to set, and even though it was the dead of winter in Canada, the night was clear and crisp, the sky starting to light up a mixed shade of orange and pink.  She looked over at William, his eyes illuminated by the setting sun.  For all her thinking half the time that he was so perfect she didn’t think he was real, she was reminded of his status by the beanie he was wearing on top of his head, the Maple Leafs logo glaring back at her.  

He pulled the car over to the curb right in front of the bakery.  Aberdeen could see inside, and it was pretty busy – like it usually was.  She looked at him again.  “Do you get recognized a lot when you’re out and about in the city?” she asked.

William shrugged.  “Enough.”

She looked between him and the busy bakery again, biting her lip.  “Then how about I go in and bring the food back,” she said sheepishly.  “That way it’s not…I mean we’re not seen toget—”

“I understand, Aberdeen.  It’s okay,” he said, kissing her hand.  

“I’m sorry we can’t, like, eat it inside or whatever,” she said sheepishly, knowing that it was because of her anxieties about being caught that they couldn’t be seen in public together.  Sometimes she wondered if he had the same, although she doubted it.  He was an extremely private person and didn’t let the media know about one iota of his life or who he really was as a person, but he was so carefree with her that she wondered if he let his guard down because his love for her blinded him or something.  

“Hey…” he said, leaning over the centre console again so he could give her a soft kiss.  “It’s fine.  I’m just happy to be spending the night with you.  Now go.”

Aberdeen came back with a feast.  A giant slice of lasagna (for him), gnocchi in a rosé sauce (for her, her absolute favourite), and two sfoglio cannolis.  When she got back in the car, bag filled to the brim, William was smiling.  The smell of all the food instantly filled the car and he almost melted right then and there.  “God, that smells fucking incredible,” he said.  “Alright, next stop.”

“What’s the next stop?”

“You’ll see.”

Aberdeen rolled her eyes again.  She didn’t have to wait long, though, because within minutes – seriously, the food was still steaming – they’d arrived at Prince of Wales Park, a small park on the edge of the lake with an amazing and underrated lookout towards the Toronto skyline.  The park was empty, with it being the middle of winter, and so was the small parking lot.  William parked right at the end, facing the skyline as the sun set over the city.  

Aberdeen and William looked at each other at the same time once he put his car in park, turning off the engine but leaving the heating on.  “You were planning to eat in the car anyway, weren’t you?” she asked.  

“Maybe,” he smiled mischievously.  

She took out the food.  William audibly moaned as he took his first bite of lasagna.  Aberdeen lay her back against the door as she forked some gnocchi into her mouth, sighing at the taste.  Between mouthfuls of gnocchi and lasagna and feeding each other little bits to taste, William began to speak, unprompted, just like she had on the way to the bakery.  He spoke about growing up with his big family in Sweden and the United States, going back and forth every year.  He spoke about skating on rollerblades in his backyard and hitting the corner of a barbecue while his dad chased him and needing three stitches.  He spoke about his mom cooking traditional Swedish dishes and his dad being the master of pickled herring.  He spoke about hockey and being drafted and moving to Toronto at eighteen.  He spoke about having to leave his friends in Sweden but being able to see them every summer.  He spoke about how much she would love Sweden, how he wanted to bring her there, how he wanted to show her their family place in Stockholm but also their secluded country house. 

After every subject change, she’d lean in and kiss him, and he’d taste like lasagna and she’d taste like gnocchi and it was all just perfect.  

When they finished the food, and had washed everything down with some water and put the empty containers back in the bag that Aberdeen tied up and placed at her feet, she looked at William once more.  Although everything was sweet, and perfect, and lovely, and everything she would have wanted out of a Valentine’s Day date, the fact of the matter was they’d just had dinner in a car.  Alone.  Because they couldn’t spend it in a restaurant together.  Because they were together, but they couldn’t be together – out in the open, at least.

“Hey Willy?” her voice was sheepish, her mouth speaking before her brain could tell her not to.

“Minskatt?”

“You uh, you know how we’re keeping all this a secret?  Like nobody on the team knows we slept together last June, and nobody in the world knows we’re sleeping together now, and the guys on the team think it’s all like…I don’t know, like you having a harmless crush on me or whatever?” she rambled.

“Yes…” William was unsure of where she was going with this.  

“So, um…what are we, then?”

He stayed quiet for a moment.  “What do you want to be?” he asked.  

“Nuh-uh.  I’m not making the executive decision here,” she shook her head.  “Either we make a decision together or that’s it.  We need to define what this is because right now we’re in this weird friends-with-benefits stage even though we’ve already said I love you—”

“I want you to be my girlfriend,” he blurted out, interrupting her.  “I thought…I mean, I’ve wanted you to be my girlfriend since the elevator.  I thought you knew that.”

She had a hunch, but she needed it confirmed by him out loud so she knew her mind wasn’t playing games with her.  “So…so we’re going to do this, then?” she asked timidly.

“Do you want to do this?” he asked, making sure.  “Because you already know my answer.  I think you’ve known it this whole time, you just hesitate to accept it because your judgement is clouded by the fact that we have to sneak around to love one another and be together.”

For Aberdeen, the answer was easy.  It was wrong, and it was immoral, and it was a blatant disregard of the rules she needed to follow professionally and the rules she should be following societally, but it was easy.  “Yes.  I want to do this.  You’re my boyfriend.”

“Then you’re my girlfriend,” William smiled.

“We have a bit of a problem though.”

“Besides the fact that this is against every company policy known to mankind and completely inappropriate?” he asked.  It made Aberdeen giggle.  “What’s the other problem?”

“Valentine’s Day can’t be our anniversary.  It’s too corny.”

William giggled.  He grabbed her hand and kissed it before he held it in his lap, his thumb gliding over her backhand tenderly.  “When’s our anniversary then, minskatt?”

Aberdeen thought for a few moments before she came to a conclusion.  “January 9th.”

William knew the exact date she was talking about and knew why she would choose that date to be their anniversary.  “Alright then.  January 9th it is.”

Aberdeen smiled, leaning back into the door, satisfied.  They had an anniversary.  They were official.  They were on the same page, regardless of whether or not they liked that page – that page being not being able to share their relationship with anyone or anything.    It wasn’t the best page.  But they both knew there were better pages ahead.  

A secret only they knew.

“What’re you thinking about?” William asked softly.  

“You,” she replied.  He smiled.  “C’mere,” she beckoned.  

“Come where?”

She abruptly opened the door, slipping out of the passenger seat and instead moving to the backseat.  William watched as she did so, slipping out himself when he realized what she was doing.  Once they found each other in the backseat, Aberdeen climbed on top of him and straddled his lap.  “You’re being very bold, minskatt,” William smiled.  

“Count your blessings,” she winked before leaning in and crashing her lips against his.  He reciprocated readily, however ‘shocked’ he was by her bold actions.  He was just as hungry for her as she was for him, and his actions showed that: his hands wandering along her thighs, grabbing at her waist; his tongue down her throat, biting her bottom lip.  They kissed so much their lips were red and swollen; kissed so much they were fogging up the windows.

Layers.  There were too many layers of clothing.  It was winter, so they both knew there would be, but it made things annoying.  They’d taken their jackets off long ago – William had his off when Aberdeen got in the car, and she’d taken hers off soon after, not bothering to put it back on when she ran in and out of San Remo Bakery – but now there was William t-shirt and hoodie to worry about, and Aberdeen’s sweater, and…

Aberdeen felt William’s hands go underneath her sweater and shivered.

“You alright, minskatt?” William asked as he felt her body shake at his touch.  

Aberdeen nodded.  She began kissing him again, grinding her hips against his lap, causing him to groan.  His hands kept traveling higher and higher against her bare skin until he reached her bra.  Aberdeen helped take off her sweater.  William took his off, too.  She could feel how hard she was getting as she grinded more in his lap, pressing her bare skin onto his and feeling his body heat.  Eventually, he pushed her bra straps down, kissing his way down to her breasts before taking a nipple on his mouth.  Aberdeen threw her head back.  “Willy…” she sighed out, the feeling of his tongue flicking against her nipple making her shiver again.  He switched to the other breast.  “Oh, Willy…” she began to pant harder.

She dropped her hands in between them.  

As Aberdeen stuck her hand down his pants, William stopped.  “Ab—Aberdeen—”

“Willy please tell me you have a condom somewhere.”

He huffed, looking nervous.  “I d…I don’t think I do—”

“What?”

“I wasn’t expecting this, minskatt.  I swear.”  Okay, so they couldn’t have sex.  But they could still have fun, she thought immediately, because there was no way she was going to stop now.  She was too far gone.  “If you want to stop I underst—”

“We are not stopping,” Aberdeen said firmly.  “I’m—I—help me pull your pants down.”

She started on her own, eagerly, but William helped.  She saw how hard his member was and grabbed it.  She noticed William’s sharp intake of breath.  She began to stroke him, looking him straight in the eye.  “D’you like that?”

William nodded.  He pulled her pants down, too, and moved her underwear to the side.  “I want to make you feel good,” he whispered.

“You always do,” she smiled.

He smiled back at her.  He began teasing her core before slipping one finger into her.  She gasped in pleasure, biting her lip as she moved her hips slowly.  “That’s good?” William asked quickly, only for Aberdeen to nod her head just as quickly, letting out a sigh.  She tried to steady her breathing as William’s finger began moving in and out of her slowly, curling every so often.  For her part, she kept jerking him off too, his grunts her fuel.

“D’you like when I touch you like this?” she asked, mumbling against his lips, biting down on the bottom one.  

He kissed her in response, sloppy and wet to let her know what he thought.  He used his thumb to start rubbing circles against her hot core, and the sound of her mewling out his name over and over again was driving him absolutely insane.  “More,” she whimpered.  “More, Willy.  One more.”

William slipped another finger into her easily and curled them both.  “Oooooh, fuck,” Aberdeen sighed out, along with every other swear word in the book.  She quickened her strokes of his cock and he grunted again, bucking his hips slightly.  They kissed for a while longer, both their hands working magic on the other, until she felt him buck his hips again.  “Are y’close, Willy?”  He nodded, unable to form words.  “D’you wanna cum in my mouth?”

Willy’s eyes bulged out dramatically.  “You’ve gotta cum first.”

“Willy—”

“You don’t hav—you’ve gotta cum first,” he repeated more definitively, curling his fingers in her again, making her cry out.  

“Don’t stop, then,” she bit her lip.  “I’m so close.”

William leaned forward to kiss Aberdeen, and with a few more curls of his fingers and circles of his thumb, she began writhing and shaking on top of him, moaning his name over and over and over again as she rode out her orgasm for as long as she could.  She buried her head in the crook of his neck as she came down from her orgasm, feeling his fingers slip out of her.  She watched as he brought them up to his mouth and sucked.  She was surprised he’d do something that bold, but then again, he had just fingered her in the backseat of his car after she’d initiated the entire rendezvous.  “Fuck, Willy.”

“Felt good?” he asked quickly.

“Felt fucking amazing,” she responded, trying to suppress her giggle.  With her hand still miraculously on his cock, she continued stroking, slowly at first.  “You ok?”

He nodded his head.  “You look so fucking sexy,” he mumbled, referring to how her bra was still pushed down and the red flush that had taken over her body after her orgasm.  It was his favourite sight to see.  “I love it when I hear you moan my name.  I…fuck Aberdeen.”

“I love how good you are with your hands,” she smiled mischievously.  

“I love how good you are with yours,” he giggled, sighing slightly as her thumb grazed over the tip of his cock.  They kissed for a while as she continued to stroke him.  “God, you’re so fucking good.  I’m not gonna last much longer.”

“D’you want to cum in my mouth?” she asked again.

There was no backing out of the question now, but William didn’t know how to respond.  Of course it would have been nice, but there was so much to consider.  “You don’t have to.  It’s okay.”

“But Willy—”

“—I haven’t even eaten you out yet and I don’t think it’s fair—”

“—But I want to, Willy,” she said, eyes wide and staring at him with a mix of fake innocence and real determination.  “I want to.”

He didn’t say another word.  Aberdeen kissed him a few more times before she shifted her position and took him in her mouth, sucking the tip of his cock.  William leaned his head back and watched through hooded eyes as she continued to stroke and suck, leaving him utterly speechless.  It was only when Aberdeen started to go deeper that he could feel his release coming, and he suddenly found his voice again.  “Aberdeen—” he tried to get out, but couldn’t.  She looked up at him with big eyes and he was ready to die right there.  “Aberdeen, I—”

“Cum in my mouth Willy.”

With one last stroke and a buck of his hips, Aberdeen felt his hot cum in her throat.  William moaned and repeated her name over and over, much like she’d done before, and tried to keep his eyes on her as she took every last bit of him.  His jaw was practically on the floor as he looked down at her, and she up at him, until he couldn’t take it anymore.  “C’mere,” dragged her up, planting a messy, wet kiss on her lips as they moaned together, William wrapping his arms around her protectively as he could feel his cock soften.  

They kissed for what felt like hours again, kiss after kiss after kiss, until their pace slowed down and their breaths returned to normal and they realized what they’d just done, what they’d just participated in together, willingly, in a car sitting in an empty parking lot of a park overlooking the Toronto skyline.  In about twelve hours, they’d be on a plane together en route to Ottawa, solely work acquaintances to everyone around them, keeping their secret close to their hearts.

“I love you, minskatt,” William mumbled, his head still a bit dizzy but his heart still full from what had just happened.  

“I love you too,” she responded, her chest rising and falling with her breath, her head equally as dizzy and her heart equally as full.

***

William couldn’t keep his eyes off of Aberdeen, now that they were back in the driver’s and passenger’s seat, on Islington Road heading north to get on the Gardiner Expressway.  She had a flush on her cheeks and a small smile on her face as she looked out the window.  The night was completely dark now, with only the streetlights illuminating the road for them until they got back into the city.  The playlist was playing in the background, but neither bothered to turn the volume up or change the song yet.

William drove slowly.  To have more time with her.

“Minskatt?” he asked softly as they were stopped at a red light.  Aberdeen turned her head to look at him.  “Being with you feels right,” he told her, his voice firm and with conviction.  

“Even though what we’re doing is wrong?” she asked.

William shook his head.  “That doesn’t matter.  I don’t care about the rules.”  He considered her words – how she admitted it was wrong – for a moment and got nervous.  “Does it feel wrong to you?”

“No,” she replied immediately shaking her head.  “Not at all.  But you have to understand that this…this is simultaneously the most wrong thing I’ve ever done, but also the most right.  I don’t know how to explain it.”

“I get it completely,” William said.  “But I don’t regret any of it.”

“I don’t either.”  Aberdeen surprised herself by saying those words out loud.  But they were true.  She didn’t.  She didn’t feel any regret.  “You…you know that right?”

William smiled softly.  He was very, very well aware how much she was sacrificing to do this – to be sneaking around with him – and he was very well aware of how, for her, everything hung by a thread.  Everything for her was on the line, everything, and she was willing to risk it all for him.  That was why he was so protective.  That was why he was so secretive.  That was why he tried his best to keep everything so low-key, to not have people catch on, and if they did, to not take it too seriously.  “I do.”

When she picked up his phone as he took the on-ramp onto the Gardiner Expressway, she chose another song, ‘In Your Eyes’ by the Weeknd.  William recognized the tempo immediately and smiled.  They moved along to the music, singing the lyrics together as they drove on the highway.  Aberdeen danced in her seat and William grooved from side to side as much as he could while still being alert and paying attention to the road.  Near the song’s end, Aberdeen grabbed his phone again and queued the next song.  

When the familiar chords began to play, the synth coming in and the beat loud and strong, William looked over to her and smiled.  “How did I know?” he asked.

“Did you expect anything less from me?” she asked rhetorically, giggling slightly.  

Midnight… You come and pick me up, no headlights… Long drive could end in burning flames or paradise…

Hearing her sing was one of the best things in the world to him.  Almost as good as hearing her talking about writing.  Almost as good as hearing her read her own writing.  There was such a lack of inhibitions in the way she sang and the way she moved, the way she didn’t care about facades or rules or appropriateness anymore, that made every lyric, ever hand motion, every movement and every head bop so endearing to him.  When she took out her phone and began recording the lights on the horizon, all the skyscrapers lit up in the crisp winter’s night air, he reached across the console and held her hand.  Hands that held the ring he got her on it.

Because he could now.  Without any reservation.  

And when Aberdeen smiled, all was right in the world.  

When they got back to her apartment, Aberdeen was reluctant to leave.  William had put the car in park but neither of them moved to say goodbye or do anything, really.  They were lucky that her street wasn’t a main street; that it was residential and tucked in behind two other, more major streets, so that they wouldn’t be honked at or bothered.  

“Have you packed for tomorrow yet?” Aberdeen asked, her voice quiet.

William shrugged.  “Just gotta choose a suit, really.  There’s nothing to it.  You?”

“Yeah,” she nodded her head.  “My suitcase is pretty much always ready to go nowadays.  I’m uh…Brendan actually gave me lunch time off so I can meet up with Siena.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.  She’s even coming to the game.  Not in the press box or anything but she’ll be in a seat somewhere in the arena.  You might get to see her.”

William stayed silent for a few moments.  “Did you like tonight?” he asked.

Aberdeen smiled.  “Very much so.”

Some more moments of silence.  It wasn’t until William leaned over to give her a kiss that there was another sound.  “I love you, minskatt.”

She smiled into the kiss.  “I love you too, Willy,” she said, for what felt like the tenth time that night.  She put her hand on the door handle and pulled so the door would open.  She knew if she stayed any longer, they’d be there all night, either kissing or just sitting there in silence.  “Get home safe, okay?  Text me.”

He didn’t want her to leave, but he digressed because they both had an early wakeup time tomorrow.  He also knew that he’d be seeing her in a few hours again, anyway.  “I will, minskatt,” he gave her one last kiss before letting her go.

When Aberdeen walked into her condo building, it was like the concierge was waiting for her.  “Ms. Bloom?” he asked as she walked by the desk.

“That’s me…”

“This is for you,” he said, handing her a large manila envelope.  “Courtesy of your friend,” he nodded towards William, still waiting outside in his car until Aberdeen turned the corner to get to the elevator where he wouldn’t be able to see her.  

She furrowed her brows.  When…?  How…?  “Thanks…” she took it from him, thanking him politely before making her way towards the elevator.  Once she was in, she pressed her floor number and tore open the seal.

Inside, there was a valentine.  A poorly made and executed valentine, but a valentine nonetheless.  William had cut out a giant heart out of red construction paper.  He’d glued googly-eyes on it to make a face, glued pipe cleaners and cotton balls and stickers where necessary, and had even used glitter.  She laughed out loud – it honestly looked like a valentine made by one of her mom’s first graders.  When she noticed it was a card, she opened it up.  She saw, in William’s handwriting:

Jag tänker på dig när jag inte ens tanker

It was when she got to her bedroom that she punched in the words, with all their accents, carefully into Google Translate on her phone.  Again.  He was always making her translate things, although she highly doubted there would be a communication error this time around and think he was calling her ‘little shit’.  When the translation came up, her heart skipped a beat.

I think about you when I’m not even thinking.

[hopelessromanticspoonie]

Congrats on 750 and thanks so much for doing this! Can I please request “4. I need to know that you can trust me. Please.” for Tom? Angst to fluff with maybe a dash of smut at the end? I could see either Tom or the OFC say this under different circumstances, but I would leave that choice up to you! Thanks again and also thank you for creating such a wonderful blog:)

Thank you so much for sending this request! I will admit that this is incredibly long at 3.4k words and it 100% got away from me to take on a life of its own. As it stands, I couldn’t make any smut work in it, but I do hope that you enjoy it nonetheless!

Thank you to @vodka-and-some-sass who gave me some very helpful insight on this fic! It wouldn’t be what it is without you!

Warning: language!

Five Stars

“Ben, I can’t. I’m sorry, but I’m swamped working on the cues for-”

“Too busy to pop into our Ugly Sweater party? Nonsense! You must come. It has been ages since we’ve seen you.”

You made a noncommittal grunt, scouring the thoroughly marked script in front of you, ignoring the pixelated face giving you a very stern glare from the screen beside it.

“It starts at eight. Sophie will be so pleased to know you’re coming.”

The screen went blank after his unceremonious goodbye. You rolled your eyes before pulling the pencil from behind your ear to make another note. Ben was a force of nature, had been since you’d met him starting out in theatre, and it was easier just to go along with whatever he wanted whenever he got an idea into his head. Maybe a few hours of fun might do your exhausted mind a bit of good. Clear the clutter and whatnot. What could it hurt?

~

What was the line between a sweater being so ugly it was awesome and just being embarrassingly terrible?

You were sure you had crossed that line with the getup you were wearing, but there wasn’t time to change as you had already knocked on the door to the Cumberbatch house. You were swept inside from the soft snowfall into a pair of long, lanky arms and crushed against an almost skeletal body.

“It’s been so long! Come on, Sophie can open the wine you’ve brought, and then I need to introduce you to some new friends.”

You followed along without getting much of a word in edge-wise, nursing a glass of red wine thrust into your hand by Sophie before you made the rounds at Ben’s side. Names and faces went in one ear and out the other. Hands were shaken, cheeks of old friends were kissed, and small talk was made. The cheery Christmas music in the background and the slight buzz of alcohol in your system helped to loosen you up, and soon you were sitting on the arm of a couch, contentedly people watching when Ben confidently strode up to you, ushering along someone behind him.

“You look positively bored out of your skull, and I have just the solution. I’d like you to meet Tom,” he said with a grin and a flourish, stepping out of the way to present ‘Tom’.

“Tom Hiddleston,” he said, the familiar face sheepish as he held out a hand for you to shake. “Ben has regaled me with great tales of your running around together years and years ago.”

His hand was warm when you took it, smooth and firm and completely enveloping yours with the length of his thin fingers. “I’m sure they’re highly edited versions of what truly happened, all spun to put him in a more attractive light.”

“On the contrary,” he smiled, running his hand through the auburn locks curling behind his ears before shoving his hand into the pocket of his dark jeans, “they were tailored to do so for yourself. Perhaps you can tell enlighten me with your perspective?”

And that was how you spent the evening chatting with Tom Hiddleston. You had known that he and Ben were close friends, he’d been mentioned in passing before, but it was one thing to hear about ‘Tom flying to the States to work on a film’ and another to have the full force of Tom Hiddleston and his breathtaking rapt attention clothed in a gaudy Christmas sweater directed at you from close range. It was secretly thrilling to hold the focus of someone so beautiful, to watch his eyes sparkle and mouth pull back into a grin at your jokes and anecdotes. His hands spun tales in the space between you, as expressive and vibrant as his many impassioned tangents. You couldn’t deny the twist of butterflies in your stomach when his hand settled onto the middle of your back and his head craned down to better hear your point over a sudden burst of laughter from the other party guests.

But the night couldn’t last forever, and the glass of spiked eggnog Ben had slipped into your hand was in cahoots with the late hour to make you drowsy. Your poor attempt at stifling a yawn behind your hand did not go unnoticed by the keen blue eyes that hadn’t left you since you’d been introduced what felt like an eternity ago.

“Perhaps we should call it a night,” Tom offered, standing up and stretching languidly. It was pure force of will that kept your eyes from lingering on the peek of pale skin at his hip revealed by the gaudy red bottom of his sweater riding up from the innocent movement.

You slipped your phone out of your pocket, nodding in agreement. “You’re probably right. I’ve been working myself to the bone. I’ll just call an Uber and then make the rounds.”

His hand closed over your phone, pushing it gently down to your side. “I was about to leave. Allow me to give you a ride, in payment for monopolizing so much of your time?”

How could you say no to such an earnest face? With his brows lifted into a hopeful smile, you were hooked. “Let me say goodbye?”

You left Tom to wind your way through the mingling crowd, the music and murmuring having leveled off to more intimate levels as the evening wore on. It was easy to find Ben stationed in the kitchen, packing away the leftover finger foods.

“Heading out?” he asked when you handed him a cheese platter, glancing around you before turning to the open refrigerator once more. “Sophie wanted to say goodnight before she went up to bed, but she couldn’t find you.”

Their home wasn’t that big, but you let it slide with an exaggerated roll of your eyes. You carefully put your empty glass into the overloaded sink. “Yeah. It’s getting late, and Tom offered to give me a lift back to mine.”

“Oh, Tom?” The interest on his overly expressive face was impossible to miss. “Hit it off, did you?”

You swatted at his chest before pulling him into a quick hug. “Oh hush, you. You’re about as subtle as a slap to the face. He’s nice. Come say goodbye, you meddling fool.”

He acted overly offended, hands clutching his chest as he led you back toward the front door where Tom was waiting, already buttoned into his black pea coat. “Meddle? Me? Never!”

Tom’s answering chuckle was filled with warmth as he pulled your coat from your hands, helping you into it without any fuss. “I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about, but I’m inclined to side with the lady. You are far too meddlesome for your own good, Ben.”

“Would it be considered meddling to inform you both that you’re stationed underneath the mistletoe?” Ben asked, a devious smile on his face as he pointed above your heads.

Sure enough, he had cheekily planted that festive decoration right above the front door. Heat flooded your cheeks when you dropped your gaze down to Tom and shoved your hands into your coat pockets awkwardly. “That bastard.”

He shifted just a breath closer to you, so the masculine scented warmth of his body fought against the chill seeping through the front door at your side. “It is tradition. May I?”

When you quickly nodded your silent reply, his hand came up to cradle your cheek facing the room, permitting you a bit of privacy. As soon as your lashes fluttered against your cheeks did he kiss you, a quick, almost chaste brush of his lips, leaving you with just the barest taste of the chocolate he sampled earlier. It wasn’t enough.

You ignored the inferno set inside of you at the simple action and opened your eyes, startled to see Tom still so close to you. His breath fanned across your face, sweet and quick, and his thumb stroked your cheek softly before he released you from the captivating spell of his blown light-blue eyes.

“Right,” he cleared his throat, adjusting the collar of his jacket up around his neck, shooting Ben one last glance. “Thank you for inviting us to the party this evening. I’ll get in touch soon.”

You waved your goodbye before following him outside, mind trying to wrap around being included in Tom’s farewell to your mutual friend. It was surely nothing, as was the way that his hand lighted on your lower back to assist you into the car. You were exhausted. That had to explain why you were so tongue-tied and nervous for the entire drive back to your home.

“That’s me,” you gestured to the side of the road, sitting up straighter in the soft leather seat.

He pulled to a slow and careful stop on the curb. The tense silence that filled the small space threatened to choke you, but you couldn’t make yourself reach for the door. Doing so would be a definite cap on the evening. The spell would be broken and you would go back to the mundanity of daily life without the captivated ear of a handsome gentleman.

Tom broke your sorrowful train of thought, unbuckling his seatbelt. “Allow me to walk you to the door.”

In the spare seconds that you had to compose yourself, all you managed to do was thoroughly inspect a smudge on his rear-view mirror. Cold rushed into the haven of his car when he opened the door, drawing you out by the guidance of his gentle hand. He followed you to the door, towering above you and ducking his shoulders against the frigid breeze that ruffled your hair.

“Thanks for the ride.” You fidgeted with the keys in your hands, worrying the worn metal. “It was much more pleasant than an Uber ride, that’s for sure.” So smooth.

“Will you give me five stars?”

The joke gave you enough confidence to lift your face to his. You startled slightly at how close he was, the fog from your breath swirling together to mix with the scattered snowfall. The tenderness in his gaze made your heart race in your chest. Your tongue darted out to wet your lips against the wind, and the darkness that flooded his pale blue eyes made your breath catch in your throat. Snowflakes caught on his light lashes and tinted his now rosy cheeks. You heard yourself ask, “What have you done to earn them?”

Uncertainty flashed across his face for the briefest of moments before determination ticked in his temple. He stilled the clink of your keys with his hand over yours, using the contact to shift that much closer to you. Hope and the desire that clenched in your stomach bid you to tilt your pouted mouth up to him in offering. He accepted, giving you a warm, gentle kiss that warmed you from the top of your head to the tips of your curled toes. The sensitive skin around your mouth tickled from the rasp of his short beard, wholly masculine and surprisingly soft.

“Goodnight, darling. I’ll call you in the morning.”

He stayed on your doorstep until you fumbled the keys into the lock with trembling fingers. The last thing visible through the slowly tightening crack in the closing door was his kind smile crinkling around his eyes, bright and full of promise just for you.

If he called the next morning, which would be impossible because you had forgotten to give him your number like a pining idiot, you wouldn’t have been able to tell. You woke to your phone blaring out your ringtone nonstop. It had vibrated itself right off of the bedside table onto the floor so you had to practically fall out of bed to silence it. As soon as you did, another call came through from an unknown number, followed by several texts and emails in quick succession.

“What the?” Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you leaned back against the side of your bed, opening your texts because you were definitely not alert enough to speak to a living person yet.

’ARE YOU DATING TOM HIDDLESTON?!?!’

‘Was that you in the papers with Tom Hiddleston?’

Practically every person under the sun that you had ever come in contact with had sent you a message or called you, flooding your phone with notifications you were instantly too overwhelmed to handle.

You grabbed a change of clothes, answering the phone on the next ring and shoving it into your ear, not even caring who had called as you gathered your things for a shower.

“Are you alright?”

Ben. “What in the ever-loving fuck is going on?”

“I sent you a picture taken by the paparazzi yesterday. It’s all over the gossip magazines and websites. I haven’t been able to get a hold of Tom. I assume he’s been tied up with Luke all morning. Are you alright?”

You didn’t answer him, tossing your clothes onto the bathroom sink so you could flip through your overload of messages to find what Ben was talking about. There, on the front of some tawdry magazine, was a slightly grainy picture of you and Tom from the previous evening. There was no mistaking it. There you were, locking lips with the internet’s perpetually single boyfriend.

Shit. You placed the phone on top of your clothes, hitting the speakerphone so you could turn on the water for the shower. “Nothing happened, Ben.”

“I know that, you know that, and Tom knows that. But the world doesn’t, and several hundred-thousand opinions hold more weight than the truth in this instance.”

Hitting your head repeatedly against the tiled bathroom wall was suddenly far more appealing than the current conversation. “I can’t deal with this right now. I’m going to take a shower. Thanks for checking in, Ben.”

Hair damp and decked out in your softest lounge clothes, you had foolishly expected that the situation would somehow magically improve. But it only seemed to worsen upon leaving the sanctuary of your bedroom. When you peeked out from behind your curtains to see what all the shouting that you heard was about, dozens of men with cameras bigger than your face were visible across the street. They perked up at the movement and their huge black lenses all turned in your direction.

You were trapped. Grumbling, you turned on your heel to retreat to your room when loud knocks pounded straight into your skull, making you practically jump out of your skin with shock.

“Who is it?” you called, pressing your ear against the front door. Who would brave the field of paparazzi to visit you?

“It’s me! Please, let me in,” Tom called.

You hurried over and ushered him in before closing the door against the blinding flashes shot in your direction, blinking the spots from your eyes.

He held his hands out in front of him, palms up. “I apologize for showing up without an invitation, but I didn’t have your number, and I was concerned.”

You crossed your arms over your chest to hide the trembling in your limbs at the sudden spotlight thrust upon you, shrugging your shoulders in what wasn’t exactly a convincing act of nonchalance. Desperate to hide from his earnest, ever-observant stare, you went into the kitchen and set the kettle on the burner. “It’s fine, I’m fine. It’s whatever.”

His heavy footsteps matched the roaring pulse in your ears as his long legs quickly closed the distance between you. He carefully took your hand in between both of his, turning you to face him. “You aren’t fine.”

“No, I’m damn well not fine,” you huffed, pinching your nose with your free hand. You dropped your chin onto your chest, closing your eyes as you fought the anxiety gripping your lungs like a vice. “I woke up this morning to my phone blowing up because of a stolen picture with you. I’m sure half of the internet hates me because they think we’re this serious thing now, and any illusion of privacy that I had is dwindling by the second as they try to figure out who the heck I am to either crucify me or congratulate me. It’s just…”

He released your arm to curl his fingers underneath your jaw, lifting your gaze from the burgundy cable-knit jumper covering his chest. The genuine concern that creased his brow and tugged on the corners of his mouth would be your undoing if you allowed yourself the weakness. “It is quite the ordeal, and you didn’t ask for this aspect of our relationship.”

“There isn’t any relationship at all! It was only a kiss. Well, two, but still. It would be one thing if there was,” you paused, allowing yourself the luxury of fully savoring his electrifying touch before pulling your face out of his featherlight hold, “but there isn’t.”

His hand scrubbed over the whiskers muddying his razor sharp jawline before falling to ghost over the curve of your hip. “If there was, what?”

You didn’t know what you were saying, what you had just said and alluded to. Your thoughts were a blur and you couldn’t discern whether you wanted to hide from him or into him. Quickly replaying what you had blurted out in your distracted state, you sighed heavily, the weight of what could not be dragged down your shoulders. What would it hurt to say what had been lingering on your mind all morning? “If there was something between us, maybe all the scrutiny would be worth it. If we were together, and I didn’t have to face them alone. If there was a reason behind terrifying men shouting awful things at me outside of my home. As it is, I’m a prisoner in my home for no damned good reason.”

He took a step away from you, arms crossing over his chest. “A consolation prize, then?”

You wanted to slam your fists onto the countertop, scream and tear your hair out at the confusion and frustration of it all. Instead, your hands flailed uselessly in between you. “No! No, not that.”

“Then what?” he asked, silken voice as tight and guarded as the rest of him. Steely blue eyes held you captive as he demanded an explanation.

What did it hurt to admit your fledgling feelings at this point? “Being with you, it wouldn’t be some consolation prize. You aren’t a-a prize to be won, Tom. I like you, okay? It was fun to talk with you last night, and you sure are one heck of a kisser. Five stars, for sure. I just…” you waved your arms at the throng of paparazzi you could faintly hear gathered outside. “That’s a lot to take on, especially for someone I hardly know.”

His arms fell to his sides and he took a small step toward you. “If it weren’t for the fame, for the fans and the celebrity and the madness of it all, would you hesitate?”

“Not for a second,” you answered instantly. The answer came from deep within you with no thought.

“Well, then…” His hands came up on either side of your face, cupping your jaw. He moved with absolute care, slow and steady with plenty of time for you to stop him at any point. First his forehead rested lightly against you, then his nose nudged along your cheek, and finally his mouth slanted over yours in a kiss so full of passion and intensity that your knees buckled. He held you upright between his body and the counter behind you, hands splayed over your sides and fingertips molded to the soft flesh of your waist.

He tucked your head beneath his chin, nuzzling his cheek into your damp hair. “Give us a chance? Give this a chance.”

You dug your fingertips into the worn wool of his jumper, inhaling the dark and soothing scent of his cologne from your nose pressed into his chest. “Tom…”

“I will handle this, I promise,” he assured you, reaching up to cup the back of your neck, holding you to him. “I need to know you can trust me. Please.”

The tension slowly left your shoulders at the caress of his hand down your spine. You melted into him. “Ben is going to be insufferable when he hears,” you said, doing your best to keep the happiness from your voice, but you were no award-winning actor.

“Let him,” he growled, hooking his thumbs underneath your chin, tilting your face up to him so he could further prove to you with his pillowy-soft lips and coffee-laced tongue exactly why trusting him would be worth all the sorrow and strife waiting just outside your door.

~~~

Whole Shebang Taglist: @just-the-hiddles @yespolkadotkitty @nonsensicalobsessions @vodka-and-some-sass @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic @myoxisbroken @blah666 @brokenthelovely @myworddump @polireader @wiczer @littleredstarfish @the-broken-angel-13 @arch-venus25 @xxloki81xx @jessiejunebug @tinchentitri @sllooney @devilbat @vikkleinpaul @bouquet-o-undercaffeinated-roses @angelus80 @wolfsmom1 @kthemarsian @toozmanykids @claritastantrum @princerowanwhitethorngalathynius @sabine-leo @lovesmesomehiddles @silverswordthekilljoy

[somedayonbroadway]

Have you ever done oe thought about a Bandstand AU? Because I'm now obsessed.

Okay, so I was obsessed with Bandstand for a good six months after they performed at the Tonys. Kid you not, it was the only thing I listened to. For six months straight. And it still hasn’t gotten old.

Quick rant:

Corey Cott deserves a Tony.

Laura Osnes deserves a Tony.

The show deserved to at least be nominated for best musical, if not win the whole thing.

Dear Evan Hansen is great.

But it is nothing compared to Bandstand.

(Also, DEH won best orchestrations against Great Comet… like… what? Did the judges even see that show? DEH had like… a violin, a piano and a couple guitars. It hardly had orchestrations. Great Comet is a ****ing masterpiece of complex, insane music.)

End rant.

Anyways.

Bandstand AU

Characters

Jack Kelly — Donny Novitski (Piano)

Katherine Plumber — Julia Trojan (Singer)

David Jacobs — Wayne Wright (trombone)

Spot Conlon — Davy Zlatic (bass)

Racetrack Higgins — Jimmy Campbell (saxophone)

Crutchie Morris — Johny Simpson (drums)

Albert DaSilva — Nick Radel (trumpet)

Joseph Pulitzer — June Adams

Medda Larkin — Oliver

Bryan Denton — Jo

Specs — Michael “Rubber” Trojan

Okay, so…

Newly back home, Jack Kelly is having difficulty adjusting to life after the war. After losing his best friend from friendly fire, he’s guilt ridden. The minute Jack gets home, he’s bombarded with propaganda that everything would go back to the way it was before. He doesn’t believe that as he is now jobless, is struggling for money, is struggling hard with insomnia and PTSD.

As a composer, vocalist, accordion player and pianist, Jack begins to go to old clubs he used to perform at, only to find he’d been easily replaced. Finding an old friend, Medda, for whom he’d worked with before, he manages to secure gigs at weddings, getting slim money, just enough to eat and pay rent.

After a few weeks, he finds himself slowly losing it. He hears stories of soldiers’ funerals. Those guys came back fine a while ago.

They needed a way to make it stop.

Jack is on the verge of a breakdown. He can’t go a night without a drink. He can’t stop thinking about the war. About Specs.

He can’t get it out of his head.

He’s a genius and he knows it. He’s been musically inclined his whole life. He started playing when he was seven and he started composing when he was nine. And here he is, fifteen years later, still playing weddings. No one’s giving him a job. No one seems to care that he’s struggling or needs to play because if he can’t play, there’s nothing left for him.

But he hears about a contest on the radio. A contest for a swing band to compete in a contest as a tribute to the troops just back from the war.

In a moment of clarity, Jack decides that he’s going to put together a band made up of his fellow vets to shoot for fame and fortune, to show the vets that made it home that there’s hope for them.

So he takes a name that he remembers his best friend mentioned at one time, and he goes out to find a man about to play a gig at a club named Antonio Higgins who Specs had used to call Racer. Racer is a sax player, now studying to be a lawyer. While Race does try to send him away, he realizes that he might need this as much as Jack did and once he finds out that Specs is dead, he can’t say no. He’s doing this for Specs.

Race leads him to find more musicians who served. Spot, David, Crutchie and Albert.

Race doesn’t trust anyone.

Spot is an alcoholic, cracking jokes to get through the day as best he can.

David is OCD. He has clear schedules and plans out every minute of his day.

Albert is a control freak. He’s constantly irritated and just wants everything to be done the right way and for things to work out.

Crutchie lost a leg in the war as well as receiving brain damage in an accident that sent his vehicle flipping three times while he was in the war

Not all of them get along at first. But, for the sack of all of the vets that are losing hope in a post war world where there’s no place for them, they keep it together.

They get through their first gig together. All is well for about two minutes as Race tells Jack he’s glad he decided to play with him and Spot jokes around with Crutchie after Crutchie tells the guys about his meds and how they slow him down, asking him how much slower he can get without being put in reverse. Crutchie is very slow and goofy most of the time, unable to truly remember the events that occurred overseas, but he is a monster on drums. He doesn’t mind the jokes, in fact, he takes a liking to Spot.

It’s after this that Jack tells Albert he needs to come down off the ceiling while playing his solo, claiming that it’s selfish and out of line. Albert argues with him, sparking a bit of tension between the rest of the group. Albert then announced he has a chance to play with Dwight Anson Orchestra. Davey explains that Jack needs to work around his schedule. Albert says that they need to get paid.

Jack shoots back that the gigs they get are where and when they are going to play and he promises to try and give more of an advance in the future.

Once the others leave, Spot with Crutchie, trying to joke with him as he’s taken a liking to the youngest kid of the group, Race approaches Jack and tries to gently explain to him that he needs to learn how to talk to people if he’s gonna be a band leader. This sparks a small argument, almost leading to Race giving up and leaving, only resulting in Jack admitting that he has to do this for Specs.

He explains that Specs’s death was friendly fire and that he’d promised Specs should anything happen to him, he’d check in on his wife. Race advises Jack not to tell Specs’s wife how he died and tells him not to go to trial unless he was prepared to lose. Then he leaves, promising to see Jack for their next gig on Sunday.

So Jack goes to talk to Specs’s wife.

Katherine Plumber.

He knocks on the door before chickening out and turning to leave.

But he’s not quite fast enough.

Katherine laughs at him, accusing him of being too old for ding dong ditch. Jack laughs and shyly walks back, introducing himself as Spencer’s friend. Katherine’s smile fades and she asks him more questions, resulting in Jack telling her he has some pictures that might be of interest to her. Katherine invites him over for dinner.

Explaining to her father the situation, Joseph Pulitzer (yes, he’s very nice in this one. Deal with it.) he agrees to the dinner, telling Katherine that they won’t be great hosts. He tells Katherine to be careful and not to pry, that if Jack wants to tell her more information about Specs, he would.

So Katherine tries to respect the boundaries.

Katherine explains to her father that she feels selfish because sometimes she wishes she could be the same person she was before and that she doesn’t want to be defined as a Gold Star Wife. She used to have a life and she used to be somebody.

She pulls herself together when the knock on the door comes.

Joe welcomes Jack inside and Jack thanks him for his kindness while Katherine jokes that he works hard at being nice and explains that her mother is away visiting her grandparents.

While getting to know each other a little, Jack learns that Katherine can sing but she only sings a church and jokes that if he wanted to hear her sing, he’d have to go to a service. Katherine learns that Jack lost his parents when he was very young and has fended for himself ever since.

Eventually, they get around to looking at the pictures Jack brought. He tries to make the memories light.

But Katherine can’t help but ask if Jack was there when he’d died.

Jack tells her yes.

And Katherine can’t take it. So she excuses herself before dinner has even begun, leaving Jack and Joe to have dinner alone.

That Sunday, Jack finds himself at church, watching Katherine sing beautifully in front of an entire gathering of people.

He catches her afterwards, asking why she didn’t tell him that she got to perform the big finale. He then asks her if she’d like to see him and his band play that night, eventually convincing her that it might be fun.

Joe encourages her to go, telling her that she hasn’t been out since her husband had died. So she goes.

After watching their set, Katherine is surprised to be invited up onstage to sing a standard. She’s incredibly nervous, forgetting the bridge of the song but finishing strong with some encouragement from Jack. She meets the boys. She takes a liking to all of them, telling Davey that his family should be proud, joking along with Spot, immediately wanting to protect Crutchie, much like Spot does.

Jack tells them that he wants to win for the guys who got nothing.

Katherine asks him if he means Specs. And he tries to take it back but she runs off, upset. And Racer tells the guys that she has every right to be a part of this band as she lost her husband in the war. The guys tell Jack that he should try to get Katherine to sing with them.

So he goes to her work the next day. She tries to send him away, claiming she doesn’t need to be saved. Jack counters. “What if I do?” And then he sings her First Steps First before inviting her to rehearsal that night walking away. Katherine tells him on his way out that she’ll be there, on the condition that Jack tells her more about Specs.

At rehearsal, things are a little tense. Katherine quickly finds that Race tries his best to stay out of confrontation, David is constantly questioning Jack’s harmonies and chord progressions, Spot is always drunk, Crutchie is often confused, and Albert is hard to rely on. Katherine loosens up the tension as much as she can, learning the music and getting to know all the boys. She loves talking to Crutchie. She constantly takes Spot’s drinks from his hands and offers him coffee and water. She tries to get Race to open up and Davey to loosen up, while also somehow getting on Albert’s good side.

She finds that once they’re all playing together, things seem a little easier, like they all get along and work well together.

They play at a club in town called Medda’s, playing a song Jack hopes to be a winning song called “You Deserve It”. It’s snappy and catchy and all the boys really enjoy it. After this, Medda asks the band to play the next night and Jack and Kath celebrate with drinks.

Jack then asks Katherine if she’d be willing to take on a stage name, Kathy Pulitzer, saying it had a better ring to it than Katherine Plumber. Katherine doesn’t like this and leaves, unable to handle the idea of losing another part of Specs.

Jack follows her, apologizing after Katherine breaks, crying about how she’ll never see her husband’s body or get to say goodbye.

Jack promises to give her answers if she comes back to the band. So they go tell the guys they have another gig.

The next night, after escorting a very drunk Spot home, Jack expresses his worries that Spot will be wasted on the night of the competition to which Albert replies he has bigger problems and reveals he’d been rehearsing with Dwight Anson and thinks they might have a better song. He leaves, telling Jack he’d be playing with the band that had the better song.

Jack walks Katherine home, angry and scared and exhausted knowing he can’t sleep. He tells Katherine that if it were Specs, he’d be saying how they’d be winning this thing, on their way to New York in some Pullman cars, living the dream.

Katherine shows Jack a poem she’d written that makes Jack feel better. After promising — mostly — not to tease, Jack asks Katherine if he can look through more of her poems. Reluctantly, Katherine agrees.

The next day, Jack returns Katherine’s book with a new song, word for word lyrics to one of Katherine’s poems. He explains that this is the song they need to win. Katherine is hesitant but agrees to sing it.

Going to the contest, the band wins easily, hitting the judges hard with a song with a true story and one that many were too scared to tell.

Ecstatic, the band has a moment of victory before reality sets in.

They’re told that no one is paying for them to get to New York. They’re responsible for travel and getting there doesn’t guarantee them a spot on the broadcast. Jack and Race try to argue, telling them that they have to help them get there because everyone just heard them win, to which one of the producers replies that hardly anyone was listening.

And if no one saw it, it never happened.

(That moment gets me every ****ing time. The lights go out and a spotlight hits every single one of the boys. It hurts so bad.)

Their arguments get nowhere. And they’re left with this crippling news.

Jack falls to the ground in mental and emotional agony. The guys are arguing and getting worked up but Katherine is holding onto Jack, trying to make sure he’s alright.

Jack finally stands and tells them that they’re going to that contest. They have to make it there anyway they can and they’ll take every gig they can get because they have a right to respect.

And all the guys agree.

They’re done fighting for their country. It’s time to fight for themselves.

They take every gig offered to them, writing new songs and winning the hearts of their hometown (Cleveland). They even write a song about their hometown. Everyone adores it.

Jack and Katherine are closer than ever, Jack telling Katherine all the stories about Specs he can remember. He tells her one of his favorite memories of Specs which was when they were playing with some other cats in the army. Specs was playing the drums so fast, telling everyone to go faster and faster until finally he looked at Jack and just told him to sing. And Jack did. It was less of a song than a battle call.

When they write their new song, they begin to perform it everywhere they can as their town loves the song that’s all about them. While they do this, a certain club owner overheard the band talking about making enough money to get to New York. And Miss Medda hatches a scheme.

She asks the band to play more often for more pay and gets the rest of the town in on the game. Jack doesn’t realize what she’s doing.

Davey admits to Albert that his wife kicked him out. Albert offers up his home, igniting the first selfless act any of the others had ever seen from him.

Katherine tried to get Spot to give up the bottle. He refuses.

Spot starts massaging Crutchie’s back every now and then to help him relax and make him feel better after his injury.

In the midst of all of this, Katherine explains to Jack that she has to quit her job in order to make sure she could be at the contest. She says she’d be taking all the overtime and lipsticks as she could before then. She tells Jack how she lied about her mother being away to visit family and how she walked out on her and her father years ago.

And she says she wants to know what happens to Specs.

Unable to keep dodging the question, Jack breaks. He loses it, telling her that she couldn't understand. He’s crying as he recounts every detail in his brain, telling her how it happened, how it was his fault that his best friend was dead.

And Katherine runs away from him, horrified at what she’d just heard.

She doesn’t show up to the gig the next night.

Jack confides in Race who tells him that he’s letting this girl slip away from him. Jack tries to joke about Race not chasing after any pretty girls even though he has plenty of girls lining up to get a kiss from him after shows. Race says that he thought a smart guy like Jack would’ve had him figured out already.

Race lost his partner in the war.

Suddenly, things make a lot more sense.

Katherine stays home with her father, sobbing, explaining that it was Jack’s fault her husband was dead. But Pulitzer tells her that there aren’t reasons for what happens. Everything just happens. He tells her the only thing that matters is what she does next.

Katherine writes a poem and shows it to Jack the next day, apologizing even though Jack says she has nothing to apologize for. She says the same thing goes to him. She explains that she doesn’t know and cannot understand what happened in the frontlines. And this poem was for Jack and the boys.

Jack sets it to music knowing this song is too real and genuine to be played for an audience. So they change the lyrics.

This is the song Katherine would have sung if Specs had come home.

After performing this song for the first at Medda’s, Jack stands up to tell the audience that they won’t make it to New York, getting emotional and telling them that he was no hero and that the wrong guy made it home from the war. Medda stops him and explains to him he doesn’t need NBC when he has Cleveland. She hands him seven tickets to the Cleveland Limited. Pullman Cars. First class.

Jack literally breaks into tears and hugs Medda as tightly as he possibly can.

The band’s going to New York.

Jack gears up the guys for a successful contest while being awestruck and exploring New York City. Jack walks Katherine back to her room after a night exploring. They stop themselves from going into her room together after they both admit there’s more than just friendship between them.

They part ways that night, promising to see each other in the morning.

The next day, they go through preliminaries and are told they’ll be on the broadcast. Jack and Katherine sign the contract and the whole band celebrates until the next night when no one can seem to find Racer.

When Race arrives, two minutes before they’re on, he explains that Jack and Katherine signed away the rights to their own song and would be no more than walk ons if they won.

This just about breaks Jack.

Spot suggests leaving. The rest of the guys agree.

But Jack asks Katherine if she remembers all the original lyrics to Welcome Home, the poem she’d written for her boys.

She says yes.

And they know what they have to do for the soldiers out there to know they’re not alone.

They get on stage and they blow it up.

Crutchie starts the drums. Jack tells him to go faster. Faster. Faster.

Then he looks at Katherine. And he tells her to sing.

Charlie made it home.

Most of him at least .

Had three operations,

But the pain has not decreased .

Al learned to survive.

Means you never trust .

Once you see the worst in man,

Then how do you adjust?

Sean, he cracks a joke.

Claims to be alright .

Drinks a fifth of vodka

In his kitchen every night

And I stand here trying

Like mother Mary

With my private burden

Of grief to carry  

Welcome home my boys

Welcome home my sons

Welcome home my husband

Welcome home my love  

Welcome home

Welcome home

Welcome home  

David’s never free.

Schedules out his day.

Filling every minute

Just to keep the ghosts away .

He could never get

Back the life he had .

Faced with raising kids

Who did not recognize their dad .

Tony made it back to town

Four months ago

Lives to tell the things

No one could bear to know

Keeps his guard up now

A lot goes undiscussed

Focuses on fighting

What he finds unjust  

Welcome home my boys

Welcome home my sons

Welcome home my husband

Welcome home my love  

Welcome home

Welcome home

Welcome home  

Jack, he does his best,

Trying to pretend

What he doesn't talk about

Won't matter in the end

Jack, he made it home

But thinks it wasn't fair

How he made it out

But left his buddy there

Jack, he doesn't sleep

Because the nightmares come

Jack looks for an answer,

Jack, he looks for absolution,

And I'd give up anything

If I could give him some

And I stand here helpless

My arms extended

Knowing full well, darling,

Your war's not ended

Welcome home

Welcome home my husband

Welcome home my love

Welcome home

Welcome home

Welcome home my boys

Welcome home my sons

Welcome home my husband

Welcome home my love

Welcome home

Welcome home

Welcome home

It’s the most honest performance these men have ever given.

Months later, Jack and the band walk out of a movie theatre, joking about how good Dwight Anson Orchestra looked while Sinatra sang their song.

And some girls run up to them, asking for an autograph.

Jack gives them one, telling them to bring their father who served backstage at their next concert.

And then they leave.

They have a gig to get to.

What do you guys think? Wanna see any specific scenes?

For more Mood Boards and AUs, click here!

[spc4eva]

Mandokar: Chapter Two

Summary: Clan Vizsla returns to the Tribe and Senaar settles into her new life.

Word Count: 15,125

Author Notes: Just some more info about the Anaxian race that I've created!

An offshoot of the Sephi race, removed by generations of evolution based on Anaxes' climate. Appearance: Humanoid, sub-human, differentiated by long pointed ears (longer than most Sephi) which are hyper sensitive to the forests that they dwell in. Skin tends to be tan to dark, though there are a few fairer skinned Anaxians. Sunlight is powerful, despite the forest, which is why the melanin in their skin tends to be strong to act as a buffer when they leave the woods or are in glades. Eye hues range in earth tones, mostly brown, but a few are green. Gold is another color, while a bit rare and considered blessed amongst the people. Royalty almost always has the golden eyes. Hair color is also dark, from jet black to medium brown. Blonde, red, and light brown hair is almost unheard of and incredibly unnatural amongst Anaxians. On average, they get to the same height as humans, but tend to be more slender and willowy. Anaxians eyes work well for the dim lighting of the forest acolves and long nights. They have the ability to see in little to no light, but not utter darkness. Due to their lighter bone structures, Anaxians are quicker and more agile than other races, making for spectacular warriors should they have the inclination. Light footed from years of hunting in their forests, they are exceptionally gifted with stealth and able to fight with acrobatic feats. Despite these abilities, Anaxians have the drawbacks of being more frail than other humanoid races. For their speed and stealth, they are more easily overwhelmed by strength.

Goddess Marks/Tears: markings on the skin of Anaxians which are similar to beauty marks. Rather than be dark, these marks are the size of tears and shaped the same. Sometimes they are also referred to as petals. Each mark is gold, humming with a shimmering iridescence which is contrasted by an Anaxian's dark complexion. Most Anaxians have between 5-10 marks, though those descended of purer bloodline - ie. nobles or royalty - often have more. They are not tattoos and are on an Anaxian from birth. Those that possess a lot of them are considered 'Chosen' by the Goddess, especially if the marks play out in a more purposeful manner than just sporadic petals against the skin, placed randomly. Some Anaxians get more tattooed on them in an attempt to seem more special and it's not uncommon. However, the tattoos don't have the same glow as the natural marks. Often Anaxians will use the tattoos to link their marks together in designs. 

Note: Anaxians are not long lived like Sephis. They live 80-100 standard years on average. Anaxians do not reach sexual maturity until 20 years old, taking a little longer to grow through their adolescence into adult bodies.

Anaxians are also not well traveled. They don't like to leave their home planet often. Pure Sephis often call them forest bumpkins, so there's a little love lost between the similar races.

Most of Anaxian culture was inspired by wood elves from Lord of the Rings with a mixture of Celtic heritage. 

Inspiration photo for Anaxians (and Sena specifically) is  this

Crossposted on AO3

The helmet was more comfortable with the padding, but she wasn't forced to wear it much around the ship with her aliit. Senaar Vizsla. She repeated it numerous times in her head, staring at the ceiling as she cocooned herself in a pile of blankets on the floor. Hux, her buir now, told her not to dwell too deeply on what had happened on Anaxes. He'd said that nothing could be done and carrying that in her heart would just hurt. When she asked about her papa, he explained that he was marching far away, but one day she'd see him again. He taught her the prayer to say every night before bed and that more names would join her papa's, but it was her duty to remember them and love them. Sena was fully committed to becoming Mandalorian, even if she was a bit nervous and frightened by the shock of everything that had happened. Be strong. Papa would be watching and she had to make him proud... buir and ori'vod too.

" Sen'ika ," Paz entreated, drawing her attention as she leered at the ceiling of the ship, hiding in her blankets as if it were a toasty little garrison. Hyperspace was cold, much colder than most of Anaxes' yearly climate. "Come sit over here."

Dragging her blankets with her, helmet nestled against her tummy, she sat beside Paz and eyed what he was working on. Set in front of him was the rifle he had used during their escape from Genmaris. Now, it was in several pieces, he had a cloth and swatches of cotton, many of which were stained with blaster residue. He was cleaning the weapon.

"Have you ever taken one apart before?" Paz inquired lightly, gazing down at her with icy blue eyes. Despite how shockingly pale his eyes were, they were still kind and warm. He had short blonde hair, messy from his helmet, and was probably not much older than her despite his height and fitness.

"I know how to take the slide off of my pistol, but I've never taken it apart like this," Sena admitted, cheeks burning as she wondered if she was severely behind in her knowledge. What if the other children made fun of her? What if she was stupider than kids a lot younger than her? Would her buir disown her? Take the helmet back and tell her to get out?

"Most firearms are the same aside from the coils in buttstocks of rifles and shotguns," Paz eased, sensing the girl's worry. "You will need to know not only how to fire your weapons, but how to clean them and assess any issues you may have while firing. Weapons are our religion, so we must take good care of them to protect our people. Now, let's begin-"

Paz showed her the various pieces of the rifle, the charging handle, the bolt, where cartridges were loading. There were bits of information that were familiar, as there was some overlap from what she knew about her pistol. Having her hands on it, manipulating the pieces, putting them together and taking them apart - everything clicked rather swiftly. The visual and physical method of learning, rather than out of a holobook, took repetition and application. The distraction was greatly appreciated and Sena was keen to prove that she was a quick learner.

They moved onto a blaster, Hux dropping down from the cockpit, cocking his head as Sena cleaned the weapon. "I thought I told you to clean them," he said, directing his attention toward Paz.

"I can help!" Sena insisted quickly, before Paz even had the chance to offer.

"I thought she should begin her lessons," her vod retorted, stiffening under the tart gaze of their buir .

"Teach yes, but don't let her do all the work. I assigned you this task," Hux reminded him duly, looking to Sena next, who jolted erect under his pale gaze. "Let your ori'vod finish the rest. Come along, there are many things you need to learn, ad'ika."

More distractions. Scampering up from her blankets, she followed her buir deeper into the ship and away from Paz as he was left by the armory. This part of the Kote was filled with weights, a pull up bar, a sparring dummy, thick padded mats, and other work out items. " Buyca ." Bucket.

Sena slipped it back on and fiddled with her belt, making certain that her belt was tight enough to keep the extra material from her clothes from tripping her up.

"I am going to test your strength and endurance levels," Hux alerted her. "I know that you had some training in combat."

"A little," Sena confirmed, but knew her knowledge certainly quailed in comparison to Mandalorian standard.

Hux began prattling off exercises. He started with pushups, which weren't too hard. Sena was tiny and her limbs short. She ran around through the woods often and handled her own body weight. Capable of pushups and a few weak pull ups, she hung upside down from the bar like a monkey, braid swaying behind her as her buir remarked quietly to himself. Apparently, she was not too bad off, her excursions outside of the castle leaning well with her heritage as an Anaxian. Small, compact, ready to spring like a viper; she was putty to be molded. Her hands had callouses from where she'd climbed trees, tearing the soft palms and pads. Her feet were rough from trolloping barefoot, which would ease the pain of wearing boots and the callouses that would form on top of her soles.

And the girl could run. Around the drill shed floor, without reprieve, puffing out of her vocoder and using the boxes as obstacles. The original doubt that Hux had about taking a princess in was vanishing. Even if she might feel a little out of place amongst the Mandalorians due to her upbringing, Ardryll had not lied about her being well suited for training. The right disposition could be developed and she still had many years ahead of her before she would become a hunter. Most of all, the girl was eager to prove herself, hanging onto every word that came out of Hux's vocoder, the analyzer picking up the earnesty and excitement in her voice.

They had five more days on the ship before they were to touch down on Vorpa'ya and rejoin the Tribe. Even if the child was tired, she got up early and helped out as much as she could. It was plain she didn't know how to do many mundane tasks, given that servants had done this for her during the course of her short life. The Vizslas were patient with her, having to teach her how to turn a burner on, how to properly fold her clothes, how to wash them, how to tidy up after herself, how to be more considerate of those she was sharing space with. Hux was thankful they had the ship to do this on, glaringly aware that the girl would be tossed right into training with peers of a similar age and set before the Council before the Tribe welcomed her.

Hux's nerves faded, glancing fondly over in the direction of the plum helmet as the child bent over with his son, trying to stitch together where they had cut up her shirt in an attempt to take it in so it wasn't so baggy. Her fingers quaked and she gasped again, pricking her thumb for the umpteenth time. Despite fussing at his son before, Paz took to the girl like a womp rat to filth and was thrilled to have someone to take under his wing. It was difficult not to and Hux grudgingly admitted that to himself often at the kid's heart. She didn't give up. Settling back in his spot by the table, he wondered what Sova would have thought of the girl.

She would have loved her, he reasoned silently. Anaxes was gone. Having turned the news on in the cockpit long enough to hear about the sweeping of the Empire through the galaxy, his insides had gone cold when he saw the information regarding Anaxes. After resisting the Empire, there was a reactor failure in one of the shipyards that detonated a stockpile of hypermatter. Whether this was accidental or the locals had decided that they wouldn't allow for Anaxes to be used as a pivotal anchor point, Hux could only speculate. All that remained of the planet was an asteroid belt, wiping away the beautiful forests that Genmaris had been tucked along. As far as anyone was concerned, the Anaxian princess had been on the planet during the cataclysm.

Her anonymity was more important now. Her long ears and Goddess Tears would be easily recognizable.

Damn Jetii, you knew. You knew all along what was coming and how she'd have to be hidden , Hux cursed. Originally, he had been vexed by the arrangement, held by his debt to the Jedi. Take a princess and make her Mandalorian? He'd scoffed at the idea, but knew in his heart he couldn't abandon a child to an abysmal fate. There had been many others who had likely died on Anaxes, but Hux couldn't have saved them all. At least one would live to have a family and he could have a hand in raising her. Paz had already detailed that the little bird had attacked a trooper like a rabid massiff, flying out from the shadows and puncturing the small exposed bit of his throat. While still clumsy, the girl had managed to buy Paz time and kill the soldier. Potential . The girl had a lot of potential.

That potential was shadowed by her naiveness, but she'd grow wiser with age.

"I look lumpy," Sena had her shirt on, the poor stitching bunching up around her midsection and zigzagging where she'd not kept the line straight.

"Could use some work," Paz admitted honestly, pinching at the fabric to attempt to tug the bundling seams down. "Don't worry, there will be clothes that fit you amongst the Tribe. You'll also get some leather beskar'gam , which we'll put the jai'galaar eyes on."

Jai'galaar eyes or shriek-hawk eyes were the original clan sigil of the Vizslas.  It had been used for the Death Watch in the more recent years, disparaged and spat upon by many other Mandalorians for the Sith that Hux's brother Pre had unleashed on their home world. Originally, Hux had helped try to retake Mandalore, before realizing how wrong he had been about forcing the Resol'nare on people who wanted to live peacefully. His own commitment did not circumvent how sacred he held the lives of Mandalorians, even if they were considered dar'manda . Pre had not agreed, saying that the dar'manda would submit or die.

After being spared by the Jetii , Arydryll, he removed the blue and white paint of the Death Watch and returned home to his son, uprooting their life and moving amongst the Tribe where they were accepted with open arms under the condition that they did not remove their helmets. This dedication to the Resol'nare attracted him; the ideal lifestyle he had hoped for all of Mandalore. Yet, he knew their little covert was one of few and he cherished what they had found. Here, he could live as he wished, but without forcing it on those who did not possess the same dedication to the Resol'nare. Hux did not want glory or to partake in the fight against the Empire, he desperately wanted peace. Here, Paz would be able to learn and supply for his people. There were always threats, as being Mandalorian came with its own clauses, but the covert had escape plans if the need for relocation arose.

" Sen'ika , go work on your combat drills on the practice shed floor," Hux thrummed eventually as the girl continued to fiddle with her awkwardly sewn clothes.

"Yes, buir ," she answered obediently, trotting off without needing to be asked again.

Paz tilted his helmet, staring over at his father. Questioning.

Once the child was safely out of earshot, he let out a low sigh. "We will be landing soon and you know what'll happen. The Council will want to meet her and then introduce her to the Tribe," the man started, earning a nod of comprehension. "We will not be telling them where she is from."

"We are going to lie to the Tribe?" Paz asked, voice hitching in disdain.

"No, we are going to omit information. The less people that know who she was and where she is from means the Tribe shall be safer. Anaxes is nothing but rubble and asteroids. No one shall see her face aside from us until she marries and by that point, no one will be looking for her. Until then, it is for the Tribe's best interest that we are as nondescript as possible in regards to her heritage."

"Understood... Have you discussed this with, vod'ika ?"

"Yes, she fully comprehends the importance of being ambiguous with the Tribe. As far as they know, she's from Naboo."

"A little Naboo child who can jump and do acrobats better than the rest of them?" Paz pointed out, harping upon the natural gifts lended to her from being Anaxian.

"It explains her accent and education. They will not start her training out too difficult, as they'll want to test her to get a better idea of what age group to place her with. She still has a lot to learn in order to be as well prepared as others her age."

"Hm," Paz hummed in disagreement. "Maybe in Mando'a and hand to hand combat, but she knows how to hold her own. The others will come quickly enough."

"Keep a close eye on her. There will be an adjustment period, even if she is doing well with just the both of us," Hux warned. In the privacy of the Kote , she felt comfortable with her new clan. Amongst the Tribe, she'd be faced with unfamiliar helms, various trials, and an entirely new setting. He worried how she would react, that the comforting embrace of the ship being ripped away from her might cause her to falter. It was all she had come to know after leaving her home world and acknowledging her past life was dead. Even the most resilient children needed time to recover and whilst she was putting on a brave face, it would only take one misstep for her emotions to finally catch up with the swift pace she had set. Hux was expecting a breakdown of enormous proportions in the coming days.

"Of course, she's my vod'ika . I'll not let anything happen to her," Paz swore, the oath so deep and intended that Hux smiled. This was the Way.

Vorpa'ya was coated in lolling hills rustling with tall green grass. Not a tree in sight, the plains spreading onward, and the sun pelting down across the landscape to catch the glimmering shift of the wind through the grass. So open and exposed, so strange and unfamiliar as large brown herbivores meandered the grass. They had four pronged horns that cradled their faces, mooing quietly as they gnawed on the vegetation and trotted along. Despite the sun's glare, the temperature was mild and the wind chased away any discomfort the sun's smile might provide.

Dome shaped homes littered the largest hill, cresting upon it like little green dimples. The steel had been thatched with grass, which grew tall and swooned in the wind. From above, the houses would be impossible to discern from the rest of the rolling land of Vorpa'ya. Between the homes, the people milled around - the Tribe. Beskar helmets painted in various hues, visors shifting between T and Y-shaped, and daily life gliding forward, seemingly untouched by the war that ravaged the galaxy. The people were not ignorant to it, as each Mandalorian donned at least three weapons a piece, the hunters even more, but they were careful, meticulous, and on guard. Any day, their little village could be disrupted and they were prepared to fight and escort the children far away to relocate the covert.

Following awkwardly between Paz and Hux, Sena's head swiveled around. Visors tilted toward her, noticing the new bucket amongst their Tribe, and greeted her aliit in kind with, " Su cuy'gar " and " Su'cuy " from a few very small children who did not wear helmets. Even if this was not the comforting forest, Sena's heart burned in her chest, warmed by the atmosphere, and she smiled stupidly beneath her helmet as she offered a few little waves to children running underfoot. Some attacked Paz, forcing the trio to stop as a child collided with her shins.

"Hello," Sena chimed, looking down into the bright blue eyes of a twi'lek boy.

"You're new! Who're you? I like your bucket. It's a pretty color," the boy was no more than five and tugging at her trousers.

"My name is Senaar," she bent down toward the grabby hands and picked him up, a little surprised by how much he weighed. She'd already committed, so she huffed him up onto her hip and let him tug lightly on her long, black braid. "What's your name?"

"Zim!" he squealed, palming her helmet and pushing his brow against hers. Sena knew that this was a keldable kiss and was exchanged between family and lovers, but didn't know what to do when a child was doing that to her. The big blue eyes opened, pinning her reproachfully, and he butted her more forcefully - demanding reciprocation.

"Bonk," Sena muttered, offering him a small headbutt.

Zim giggled delightedly.

"Run along now, ade. Lalli is undoubtedly looking for you little womp rats," Hux scolded, but there was no spice or menace in his voice.

" Sen'ori , come play with us later?" Zim asked quickly, knowing the moments he had with her were numbered to the second.

"Uhm," she was bending down to put Zim back on his feet. "If it's allowed..."

Paz gave her a reassuring pat on the back. "I can show you the town and nursery later," he told her, Zim galloping off with the other younglings before they were allowed to continue their passage amongst the covert. "Do you have a lot of experience with children?"

Her cheeks burned and she shook her head. "Not really. There weren't that many kids around... there. And if there were I wasn't really allowed near them. Not because I'd get in trouble, but mostly just social standards. No little cousins or anything like that."

The nicest thing about this village was that there were so many people to talk to, to not treat her like a princess, and estrange her due to her status. People always dreamed about being a princess, but most of her friends had been written in the pages of books. Everyone in Genmaris had been wary about offending her, even though Sena tried not to come off as rude or cold. Just the brush with the children made her ecstatic, because she'd never experienced anything like it. Little Zim had forced himself into her arms and stolen two keldable kisses and he barely knew her. What would everyone else be like?

"You'll get the hang of it. Zim was rather taken with you," Paz assured her.

"I hope so. If we have time, I think I would like to go to the nursery," Sena insisted, licking her dry lips beneath her helmet as they approached the largest domed structure, which was located at the epicenter of the camp. Two grand doors were propped open, leading into a cavernous room that pelted warmth. Situated in the center was a circular hearth where pale white blue flames lanced up the rim, stabbing up like daggers toward a range hanging from the ceiling that filtered any smoke and helped contain the immense heat that wafted from the fire. Seats were arranged against the wall, curving into the structure in the form of benches, where dozens of adults could sit around the forge.

Dozens were not there now, only a few. Immediately, her eyes sought out the most imposing of the crowd, a broad Mandalorian in soot black painted armor. He had a hammer in his hand, pausing to watch them carefully, his visor framed by white so that it was distinguishable from the darkness of the rest of the armor. On the other side of the forge was a female with a golden helmet, who appeared to be helping him, the crown fringed with short horns.

"I have not seen that helmet in a long time," the black-painted Mandalorian declared in a deep, resonating voice that echoed throughout the hall like ocean waves crashing against a rocky coastline. "A Foundling, Vizsla?"

" Elek , Smith," her buir stepped forward, brushing his hand along her shoulder and bringing her forth with him. "Senaar."

Uncertain of what to do, since she was no longer a princess, she simply stood there stiffly. Her helmet wasn't reading the Smith's voice very well, coming up as unknown.

"She is Mandalorian?" the Smith inquired, cocking his head slightly.

Sena was getting better at reading body language. Despite the fact she had seen Paz and Hux's faces, they tended to still move around as if they were wearing their helmets. Body language spoke volumes and the questioning turn of a helmet was already ingrained in her brain. She still had to learn the other nuances.

" Cin vhetin ," Hux offered simply. "I have renamed her."

"Welcome to the Tribe, Senaar of Clan Vizsla," the Smith greeted, visor skimming over her frame. "It appears you are in dire need of proper attire. Armorer, could you please assist in getting our new vod outfitted?"

The golden helmeted female stepped forward, bending down slightly to lift Sena's arms and take a few measurements. Her fingers picked at the atrocious stitching that Sena had managed and she murmured quietly to herself. "I should have things that fit you, vod . Come along."

Despite the encouragement from the young woman, she threw her head toward her buir , who gave her a nod. Allowed to follow the Armorer, they entered a back room in the hall. Considerably smaller, but chocked full of supplies to include various ingots of steel, most of durasteel, some of beskar, cloaks, boots, trousers, shirts. This was a supply closet, most of the attire dark and earth toned. A warrior's armor was where their personality was displayed in the colors in which they chose to paint it. She noticed that the Armorer's bucket was not painted, but shimmered gold. Sena wondered what color was beneath hers, but hadn't thought to touch the plum paint.

Pulling a few tops out, the Armorer decided which size would work best and began to create a pile for Sena. Boots, socks, underwear, and gloves were added to the ensemble. Finally, she pulled a few leather vests out, tightening it around Sena's frame to make certain it fit.

"This will be your armor until you can hunt and earn your own," the Armorer explained, adding leather vambraces and leg pads. "Get changed up and I will show you how to adorn them."

Sena was worried that the Armorer would wait nearby, but the female was discreet and stepped out of the supply closet to let Sena change in privacy. Discarding her frumpy, borrowed attire, she swapped it for clothing that fit much better. The pants were a little long still, but at least they didn't require a belt to keep up. The fabric was dark brown like dirt, the neckline curving up to hide her throat entirely. With gloves, knee high boots, a belt, with pouches - she stood there awkwardly trying to figure out what to do with the cuirass.

"Armorer?" she called tentatively, the gold helmet popping back in the doorway at the sound of her name.

"See these here?" the Armorer touched her gloves to the loops on the suit she was now wearing. "The armor attached to these points. Let's begin with the cuisse and greaves," sitting her down on the bench, she began strapping up the leather pads over her thighs and against her shins. "The cuirass or heartplate straps in on its own. Since it is not steel, it'll be a little tighter than beskar. Next, we have your vambraces, which will act as a point of defense. This is the first item you should craft of beskar," she tied the laced, the leather polished, but missing any of the tiny buttons that Hux had on his. "And your pauldrons will be where your clan sigil is displayed. For Vizslas, that is the shriek-hawk eyes."

" Ori'vod said he would help me paint it. Am I allowed to paint the leather? I don't want to get in trouble-" Sena's fretfulness caused her to begin babbling much too quickly, earning a light chuckle from the Armorer.

"The armor is yours now. You are allowed to paint it, though leather does not hold the paint as well as steel. During your training is it very likely to chip and peel," the Armorer informed her kindly. "But you should add the shriek-hawk eyes."

Sena wagged her head in agreement, thanking the Armorer before picking up her bundle of clothes and her extra set of boots. Hugging the supplies to her chest, she trundled out of the supply room to see a few other Mandalorians poking around. People had wandered into the hall. Immediately, they looked toward her, causing her to freeze where she stood and drop a boot. The sole colliding with the ground echoed throughout the cavernous hall and interrupted all conversation. Sena wanted to faint, shaking like a leaf.

Bending down, she battled with the edge of the boot before managing to snag it and toss it back on top of her pile. All but running over to Paz, she tucked toward his side and glanced around anxiously. Sena wasn't shy, but she'd also never seen Mandalorians before the Vizslas and now she was in an entire village of them. On top of that, she wanted to impress them and not make them regret taking her in. The sheer weight of wanting to be as good as possible made her quiver anxiously a bit. Being a princess wouldn't win her any brownie points and as far as they knew, she was from Naboo.

"Much better," Paz said, looking down at her new clothes and armor. "A full Mandalorian now, vod'ika -" he elbowed her lightly, nearly sending all her belongings flying from her hands. "The Elders want to meet you. Let me hold these for you and then we'll get the chance to drop them off at home."

Elders? They sounded mighty important. Sena swallowed the impossibly large lump in her throat and gave Paz a mute nod, passing over her supplies.  She gave herself a minor pep talk, rationalizing that this couldn't be anymore intimidating than the vipers in the court. Even if she was unable to see their faces, at least they'd all been rather cordial with her until this point. Direct, straightforward, no beating around the bush. It was so unlike the climate she was accustomed to and while she liked it, she felt woefully ill prepared. Being guarded was so much easier, as was not taking most people at their word.

Arranged in the seats nearest to the forge was a council of seven - to include the Smith who sat amongst them. Most of the members had on armor, though there were two Elders, so old and fragile looking, that they did not don any armor. One was a woman who looked like a shriveled up prune, her skin hanging around her face so loose that it was difficult to tell if there were scars amongst her riddled countenance. Dark brown eyes perceived her, lancing right into her own, despite the visor that obscured Sena's.

The patriarch had a kinder expression, his face not resembling a crinkled up tissue. His skin was dark, sagging pale brows over wise irises. Braids of snow rain down his scalp and around his shoulders, a pink scar dragged along his left cheek like a bolt of lightning on a blackened field.

Four others; a female in cyan armor, a male in orange, a male in crimson, and a male in blue and white. Each one had various markings, designs, and spots differentiating their beskar. From the years of wearing the beskar, there were gouges, scratches, and marks that they wore proudly. Vambraces varied, as did weapons, and despite the fact that people said that all Mandos were the same, modulated bucketheads, Sena saw a huge difference between each of them. Not just because of their varying colors, but the manner in which they had painted designs, or highlighted the scratches with paint to make the scars pop, or the variance in design of the cuirasses as the style had improved over the years.

"Senaar of Clan Vizsla," the patriarch had a husky voice, so deep that it sounded as if it had been dredged out of the depths of Trask's oceans. "The Tribe welcomes you as our newest addition. My name is Rhenx and I am the Alor of the Tribe."

Alor sounded important, but in her nervousness, she couldn't recall if her buir had told her what it meant. "The pleasure is mine, Alor ," she retorted, still a bit too quickly, but was thankful her voice didn't fail her. The least her courtesy training could do for her was not make her sound like an idiot in front of the most important people in the Tribe. They were judging her at that moment, she was certain of it.

Rhenx gave an encouraging smile with pooled heat in her tummy and eased her shoulders. "Polite. Perhaps you could teach your aliit some manners,” he remarked, drawing a few laughs from the Elders flanking him. “Tell me, vod , what is your ambition?”

This was a question she had not been prepped for, the helmet heavy on her head as she tilted slightly to the side and considered him for a moment. Better to think than to spew nonsense. “To have a home and family. To belong ,” the answer was simple and yet it was all she could hope for now that her papa was gone. She’d not have many friends before and she hoped that she could change that here.

“Not of great prowess? To be the best hunter?” Rhenx mused, his questions making her heart thump in her chest as if she were a rabbit being eyed by a wolf.

Had she chosen the wrong words? Shuddering a breath slightly, she knew she couldn’t rescind them without looking stupid. “That too, but those come after,” she retorted, cheeks heated beneath her helmet, thankful for the mask to hide her abysmal expression.

Rhenx bellowed a laugh, making her jump. “Where did you find this one, Vizsla?”

“Naboo.”

Devoting his attention back to her, Rhenx offered another obliging look. “You have had a long journey, vod. We look forward to seeing you excel here. The Tribe is now your family, we take care of one another, protect one another. You will learn our ways and one day provide as your buir provides for you.”

Out of habit and because it felt natural, Sena bowed her head respectfully and took her leave. She couldn’t get beside Paz quickly enough, feet hastened and heart beating erratically until they had left the pressure of the hall. While the meeting with the Elders had gone much more easily than she had been expecting, she had a feeling that they’d be watching for the days to come. Until this point in her life, there had been little expectations of Sena other than to sometimes be at the right place at the right time. Taking advantage as a princess, she’d been able to shirk many duties and get away with mistakes that normal people would have been reprimanded for. There was a tiny bit of regiment in her from the little combat training she did have, but drawing upon her week on the Kote she knew that laziness and indignance would not be tolerated. Even if she was only 13, Sena was not stupid. Her frivolous years until this point were just that; until this point.

Tingling like bad food in the pit of her tummy, she considered what might happen. Part of her was fretful that she wouldn’t fit in and that she’d be detrimentally behind the others. Not in academics, because she’d studied with tutors, but in combat. They literally breathed blaster smoke like oxygen.

“You’re quiet, vod’ika ,” Paz observed as they continued to bask in the glow of the sun, heading to the edge of the town. She saw a few of the cattle grazing in the distance, otherwise just an empty landscape that seemed as if it could fall into the sky. Despite having found it pretty before, Sena was suddenly anxious at how open and scarce it was. Nowhere to hide. No shadows. Just open. “Are you alright?”

“Nervous,” Sena admitted quietly, tearing her eyes away from the moors as they paused in front of a house.

“You did well. If Rhenx likes you then there’s little to worry about,” he assured her, punching the code into the door: 568768. Hissing open, he allowed her in first.

“But I didn’t do or say much,” she pointed out, stepping down into the main dwelling area or karyai . The large chamber was not only the kitchen, but the den, dining area, and communal resting area. She noticed to the flanks of the karyai that there were doors to other rooms, assuming that these were bedrooms and a fresher.

“You weren’t a blubbering mess and you were concise and honest,” Paz countered, shutting the door and ripping his helmet off. Running fingers through his helmet curls, he cocked a smile at her that took the edge off her anxiety. “The rest you’ll have to prove, but you showed tenacity today. Seems your princess training helped a bit.”

“I felt like a blubbering mess.” She still did, clinging desperately to her clothes as if they were her last semblance of sanity. Everything was so glaringly real now. On the ship, she’d been toiling through hyperspace and with the idea of the Tribe. In theory, it all sounded magnificent. In reality, she was terrified of letting the aliit down or the rest of the Tribe. There had been moments in her life where she worried about letting papa down, but she’d never cared much for what others in the court thought of her. They had never been this close of a community. Sena expected if she made one slip up the entire village would know and talk about her behind her back. Call her a dope or an idiot.

“See, this is why I’m glad I only have one brain cell. You’re thinking too much, Sen’ika .”

She jolted, turning her head to look at her vod and let out a pitiful whine. “I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

“Were you ever this worried when you were a princess?”

She shook her head.

“Being a princess seems a lot more difficult. Just be yourself… minus the royalty thing, but you catch my drift,” Paz gave her a small pep talk, bending down to affectionately butt heads with her helmet. “Come around here. The guest room is yours now. There’s not much in it, but you can make it your own-” he pressed a hand into her back and began guiding her across the karyai and toward the first door on the left. “We can set up your own code too. Buir likes to snoop.”

They deliberated quietly on a code for the door before Paz set it. It didn’t strike Sena that he also knew her code, but she didn’t mind either way. What did she really need to lock her door for when she was amongst a village of Mandalorians? Just as he’d claimed, the room was nondescript. Decorated simply with a full bed, a dresser, a single night stand with an alarm clock, and a closet. There was a window which gazed out on the fields. The room itself was the size of a powder room in Genmaris Castle and lacked all the refinement and grace of her old chambers. No wood, no warmth from the shimmersilk drapes, nor the stash of holobooks or paperbacks. Putting her belongings on the quilted comforter, she reached up and pulled her helmet off, thankful to finally be able to smell and feel the atmosphere on her face.

“The windows are shaded, so no one can see in,” Paz gestured to the glass. “Class begins at 0500 every morning except weekends. For you, that’ll be at the Junction House. Physical training starts the day, then academia, followed by a changing schedule of marksmanship, weapons courses, and other specialized courses like reconnaissance, basic medical, starship lessons… There’s a lot to list, but it’ll be handed to you piece by piece. Tomorrow you’ll get a holocard with the schedule as it changes week to week. Days end at 1500, with the exception of specialty lessons you might have once or twice a month. After end of day, you’re allowed to do what you want. Some people continue training, some people slack off, others help around the village… Ah, and there’s a Foundling shift roster. Once a week you’ll be tasked with watching the ade . But you’re always allowed to go more if you want.”

Sena listened, nodding as she thought of the other children she’d known who had gone to boarding school. The regiment and timelines seemed similar to that, though the classes being offered here sounded way more exciting. “What do you do after classes?”

“I don’t have as many classes anymore, since I’m older and just completed my First Trial. When you’re 16 you’ll also attempt your Trial if you’re ready,” Paz revealed.

“ 16 ,” Sena gasped in horror. “That’s only 3 cycles away!”

“The Tribe will not make you do your Trial if you’re not ready,” Paz placated, but it had the opposite effect.

“Then I’ll look like an idiot ,” Sena balked.

“You better train hard then. No more running off in the woods, shirking your duties,” he smarted, making her frown.

“There’s not even any forests to explore,” she pointed out disdainfully.

“Good thing. Less distractions,” he grinned, turning back toward the door. “Put your things away and then we’ll go check out the village. Maybe you’ll even get to meet some of your vod before tomorrow.”

Giving her the first real private moment since leaving Anaxes, she sat on the edge of the bed and palmed her eyes. This was life now. A mundane room, no books, no friends, and no clue on how to do anything. That had been obvious on the ship when she’d not realized that there wasn’t a magical clothing fairy who picks up after her. Or that she actually had to make food when she was hungry and not just ask for it. Or that people didn’t like when you were a little messy. Drawing in a shaky breath, she stood up and began putting her clothes away. A new beginning. She really had to give it a try and put her heart into it, because otherwise she had nothing else. Here, she would learn life skills; how to defend herself, to supply for others, to feel a part of a community, and to build a life. Until this point in her life, Sena had never really thought much of the future aside from what she didn’t want to do, like marry Rathas. Each stride was taken day by day and her ambitions were nothing more than mischievous fun to be had around the castle.

Was she upset by the guidance? No, she wasn’t, but it still made her hands shake. There was no papa to defend her choices, to wash away any bad she might’ve done. Hux had already told her that she had to own up to what she did, even if she made a mistake. Honesty was paramount.

After putting her belongings away, she picked her helmet back up and went out into the karyai . Paz held up a piece of… dessert? She didn’t know what it was other than it was layered densely, flat, and appeared to have nuts and fruit in it. “ Uj’alayi ,” he told her, offering her a piece as he scarfed his own down.

Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she’d not eaten much since getting off the ship and they’d been eating rations. Real food was such a comforting sight that Sena nearly cried. Biting her tongue to keep herself from being dumbly emotional over cake, she picked up the sticky pastry and enjoyed the sweetness, the syrup, and the kick of spices that warmed her palate and hummed in the back of her throat. The uj’alayi was amazing. However, her gloves were now coated in stickiness. Big eyes turned toward Paz, he chortled as he washed down his cake with water.

“Wash your hands,” he reminded her, as if it were so obvious - which it was - but she hadn’t thought of it just standing there like a dope.

Coming around the counter, she scrubbed her gloves free of the syrup and picked her helmet up from where she’d set it down. “Do we get to eat that everyday?”

“Our teeth would rot right out of our heads,” Paz chortled. “ Uj’alayi is a treat. Bhone delivered this to us - the Elder in the cyan armor.”

“Oh, that was very nice,” Sena remarked, slightly disappointed that the cake was not a part of everyday cuisine. If she were still a princess, she could demand that it was. Here, she’d just look like a petulant brat. “How would I say thank you? Do I send a gift back or-”

“You could just thank her next time you see her. You’d really impress her if you said it in Mando’a. ‘ Vor’e’ would work.”

“ Vor’e ,” she repeated quietly, hoping that Paz hadn’t just told her how to say something rude to the Elder, but knew she had to trust in his guidance. He was one of few people she was somewhat familiar with around these parts and one of even fewer whose face she could see. Taking in a deep breath, filling up her diaphragm as much as she could muster, she turned her eyes to Paz. “Alright! Let’s go do things. Now it’s your turn to show me around.”

“The village isn’t half as large as Genmaris and you knew that place better than the back of your hand. Won’t take too long and then we can stop by the Nursery,” Paz picked up his bucket and slid it back on.

Donning hers, they went back out into the village where Paz escorted her past the huts and toward the big hall that they’d entered first. That was the Foundry - the important place where all the Tribe gathered and also where armor was forged. Radiating out in a spiral where the other important buildings, which were larger than the residential homes. These included the Junction House, the School, and the Nursery - where all the children to teenagers would spend their time during typical academic hours. The Den was where the hunters met up, dropped off what they’d earned, and had a few drinks time willing. The Cache was another supply location, but it was mostly groceries and miscellaneous housing items. There was also a small mechanical hut with spare parts for the few ships the Tribe had and Med-Deck where the doctor lived. Otherwise, training that did not occur in any of the aforementioned locations were done out in the fields surrounding the village.  

Circling back around to the Nursery, they spent a little time with the children before dinner, the tykes throwing themselves at her when they found out that Ori’vod Paz now had a sister of his own, leading them to assume that she’d be just as fun and amazing as him. The expectations made her a little dizzy, unable to heft the kids quite like Paz could, but she did manage to tumble on the floor with a few of them. Zim had all but claimed her as his own, demanding headbutts every spare second she had to breathe. So, for those brief couple of hours, she forgot about how nervous she was about her first day of school and meeting the other kids her age. According to Paz, her class was aged from 10-14.

When they returned home, Hux already had food ready on the table, looking at them expectantly as gloves were removed and hands were washed. Plated before her was an orange-red curry, the spices making the hairs in her nose curl. The meat and sauce was piled on top of a grain. Since she was hungry, she began spooning it into her mouth, immediately regretting what she had done as her tongue went taut and began to burn as if both suns of Tatooine were sitting upon it. Eyes watering, it took every ounce of willpower not to spit it back out, the other two Vizslas watching on with absolute mirth and delight as she reached for her drink. That didn’t do any better, because even that was spiced.

Panic began to set in as she panted, blinked over and over again as her chest ached.

“Giving you a heturam? ” Paz grinned to her contempt.

“If you’re hungry, you’ll eat it,” Hux barely looked up from his own food.

She managed to turn over the rice and push some in her mouth which helped with the burn. Neither of her aliit were bothered by how spicy the food was and she wondered if her buir had purposely made hers hotter just to get a kick. By this point, her entire tongue was scorched of any taste buds, allowing her to force down a few more bites as her throat rebelled. How had they gone from uj’cake to this?

Ending the day with a shower, she wandered over to her window, her headband off and her ears finally free. Gazing out, she noticed how the moonlight dappled the grass and turned it blue like back in Genmaris. She thought that it was rather pretty how the wind would tangle its fingers through the tall fronds, scattering them in rippling ethereal waves as the moonlight highlighted them. There were no birds, no songs to look forward to in the morning, but then again… Sena was the bird now. Clinging to the edge of the window, she lingered, wishing to open it but afraid that someone might pass by and see her face.

Papa, I miss you.

---

Bzzt. Bzzt. Bzzt.

It was the most Goddess awful sound she’d ever heard in her life. Rolling over, she eyed the alarm clock which read 0430, blinking its red lights at her, indicating that it was time to get up. Groaning, she slapped it a few times, trying to get the atrocious noise, that sounded akin to a loth-cat being strangled, to stop. Finally, she found the button and clicked it off, rubbing her eyes as they quickly adjusted to the dim light of the room. Dawn was just on the horizon, but it was not time for sunrise for another couple of hours. Sena hadn’t slept well, her anxiety hitching with the hours and when she finally had shut her eyes, she had only gotten a couple hours.

Changing from her pajamas - a simple pair of leggings and a t-shirt - she traded them for her jumpsuit and began fumbling at the armor. Her fingers weren’t dexterous at it yet and she kept eying the clock, realizing she was taking much longer than she should have. Tying her boots too tight, she grabbed her helmet and ran out of the room, forgetting her headband and having to turn back around to get it. Paz was already about to leave and she was frantic, sprinting to the counter to grab a piece of toast before forcing it down her gullet. Some food was better than none.

Oh, Goddess. Only 5 minutes.

She shoved her helmet on her head and ran out of the house. Her brother was already gone. Whipping her head around she started for the Junction House, her stomach balling up, bile rising in the back of her throat as she slipped into the room just as the bell chimed. Sena was momentarily relieved until she realized she was standing by the door while the rest of the class was neatly arranged in a formation on the padded mats. A pair of adults looked her way, her fingers clasping together in front of her to prevent her from shaking.

“Vizsla?” the male adult, in juniper blue armor inquired, his visor accented with holly red.

“Y-yes, sir,” she stammered, stepping forward after counting 10 students sitting on the ground.

“ K’olar! We haven’t got all morning,” the male informed her, gesturing sharply, his voice powerful and commanding.

Sena stumbled forward and waited expectantly.

“At attention,” he sighed, shaking his head at her.

“Att-” she’d seen guards and knights snap to attention when she and papa passed by them. Comprehending what he was asking, she jolted, heels together, spine erect, chin leveled, and shoulders back.

“And here I was thinking Hux would’ve prepared you for this. Not surprised another Vizsla is lacking brain cells.”

“Give the kid a break. It’s her first day,” the other teacher chimed, a female mando in polished sage green armor. Sena decided she liked this mando better.

“Learn fast or fall hard,” the male snipped.

“As long as you get back up,” Sena said in a very, tiny, tiny voice.

“What did you say?”

She stiffened, realizing she couldn’t just speak when she wanted. This was a very strange concept to her. Only speak when asked a question or given permission. Before, she’d been allowed to blabber to her heart’s content. Now she was afraid.

The female mando chuckled. “Relax, adiik. Thak, cut it out with the theatrics unless you want Hux to find you later and beat you into the wall,” she soothed, turning around and tilting her visor toward the rest of the students. “Class, this is our newest Foundling, Senaar of Clan Vizsla. I expect you all to accept your new vod with open arms and help her learn the ropes. Senaar, do you have anything to say?”

Turning around, she glanced out amongst the unreadable visors of her peers. The rest of them were wearing leather armor as well and for once, she wasn’t the smallest one. “I just want to… say hi,” the words came out sheepish and she floundered, having not prepared to be put on the spot like this. So many other children her age. So many chances to create friendships she’d never experienced before. So many chances to kriff it up. A few giggled at her, which did nothing to calm her erratically beating chest. Licking her lips, she clutched her fists and hoped that this would end soon.

“Xivi, I am tasking you with looking after Senaar today and helping explain anything she might not understand during the lessons,” the female teacher declared, giving a meaningful glance toward a girl with a bright yellow bucket.

Sena didn’t have to be a mind reader to see the slight dip in shoulders, the disappointment of having to babysit. They thought she was going to be dead weight for a while.

“Senaar go stand beside Xivi,” the mentor ushered her off.

Joining the other girl, her cheeks burned beneath her helmet as a few watched her step by. The moment she was beside her, Xivi tilted her head slightly. “Where are you from?”

“Naboo.”

The girl sighed .

Kriff. What was wrong with Naboo? Grinding her teeth, Sena waited apprehensively, solid as a statue and absolutely unmoving as the teachers, Thak & Nibak, started morning warm ups. After spreading the kids out, they began with stretches so that they wouldn’t hurt themselves. This was easy enough to follow along, as were the minor exercises that followed after. Lifting her head while doing push ups, Sena was startled to see that she was actually doing quite well. A larger girl, more than a head taller than her, was struggling to get the form down. Sena supposed that her own compact form and being light due to her race assisted in the ease of these body weight workouts. She was able to push out just as many as the boys were.

“Nice form, Vizsla. Go a little lower next time,” Thak paced between the students, giving her a nod of acknowledgement which made her let out a breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding.

“ Elek ,” she huffed, making certain that she addressed the adult properly.

“Aya, go down to your knees and keep pushing if you’re struggling,” Thak moved onto the girl who was just in front of her. “Proper form is more important than doing full push ups.”

Most of the girls were on their knees by now, trying to shove the mats beneath them, as Sena finished off her last 10. Sitting up and tucking her legs beneath her rump, she glanced around.

“Was your weekend too long? Did you eat too much uj’alayi? ” Thak craned down, scrutinizing a boy with a midnight blue helmet. His voice was pensive and sharp, angry almost. “Just because you have days off doesn’t mean you’re allowed to slack! The future of the Tribe is here and you can’t even push out 40? Disappointing. On your feet!”

Sena jetted up, bouncing slightly on her heels as she wondered what was about to happen. By the depressed postures of the other students, she had a feeling that they were about to be punished.

“Seems you all need to run off your sweets from this weekend-” his proclamation was met by numerous groans. “ Uur! I’ll hear none of it. Last one to return after five laps of the covert will be stuck with cleaning duty tonight. Viinir! ”

Buckets swiveled and feet pounded like a stampede of bantha as her peers began rushing out of the entrance. Sena nearly tripped, sputtering after them as she followed the pack, comprehending that the laps were around the village’s perimeter. Filling her lungs with air, she trotted past and set her eyes to the front. Of course she wasn’t going to be last, but she wondered if she could manage to be first. What would happen if she was the best? Did the first place winner get a reward? The loser had to clean, so she supposed at the very least she’d get bragging rights.

Kicking her legs out beneath her, she sailed forward and caught up with a boy with an unpainted helmet, the silver beskar catching in the dull blue morning light. She didn’t speak to him, didn’t greet him, but focused on beating him. That way she could go home and tell Hux what a great job she had done. Running was easy, after all, she’d done it plenty of times in more hazardous landscapes, dodging roots and rocks, hills and nooks. The grass was nothing , nor the little mounds and rises they crested and sloped across.

Five laps ended with her fighting the silver boy for the lead. Her heart burned, soaring high like a bird, her eyes stretched wide as she panted and strained for victory. Thak and Nibak were waiting by the doors, the man having his arms crossed as he tapped his foot. “Hurry up!” he intoned, despite the fact that they were the first ones back. “Djarin. Vizsla. Good job, go get a drink of water and wait for the rest of your vod. ”

She grumbled slightly, disappointed that he’d called the boy’s name first. Heading back inside, she picked up her water bottle and flipped the straw up, shoving it into her mouth and quenching her burning throat with the lukewarm liquid. Her helmet turned toward Djarin, who was also sipping at his water. “Nice job. Next time I’ll beat you,” she said hoarsely, but in good spirits. Running was probably her favorite exercise to do aside from climbing.

“I wasn’t trying,” the boy retorted peevishly.

Sena’s smile wilted on her face. “Neither was I,” she snarked, trying to sound impressive, but her voice squeaked, absolutely betraying her. Cheeks and ears heating, she sat down and muttered to herself. What was his problem? No sense of honest rivalry? She wasn’t given the time to come up with another snide remark, but she was thinking about it - imagining how she could have clapped back at him, all the clever things she could have said in place of the stupid one she’d blurted out.

Other classmates were trailing back in, huffing and puffing, in much worse shape than the victors. Amongst the last to trot in was the girl, Aya - who had a bright hot pink helmet - and a boy called Vowr whose helmet was a splotchy grey, as if the paint had faded and he hadn’t bothered to touch it up. Routines phased into hand to hand combat, which she was quite nervous about.

Paired back up with Xivi, they observed the teachers explaining simple throws and strikes, telling them to draw their punches today and aim for center mass. Eventually, they let the young teens turn back toward each other.

“You’re fast,” Xivi commented as they began going through the palm strikes. Thrust, thrust, parry, turn.

“I like running,” Sena shrugged, catching the strikes on her vambrace as Xivi continued her routine.

“Yeah but no one is Djarin fast. Gave him a run for his credits today,” she snickered, moving into a defensive position so that Sena could start her own offensive turn.

“Really? He said he wasn’t trying,” she smiled a bit at Xivi’s words. Thrust, thrust, parry, turn.

“Course he did,” Xivi snorted, shaking her helmet. “How old are you?”

“13. And you?”

“14,” Xivi answered. “I was a little bit worried about you, but you seem to be in good fitness.”

“Thanks, that means a lot to hear that,” her cheeks flushed at the compliment.

“Little word of advice though. Careful about trying to best Djarin.”

“Why’s that?”

“He’s top of the class and has been for a while. Only Kedth has come close in some aspects and the two have fought over it. Had a few duels to settle the matter-” she cleared her throat, stepping back slightly as Sena’s strike slipped through her guard and hit her chest. “Anyways, unless you want a shebs kicking, I’d advise against it.”

“I don’t think I’m nearly that good, but thanks for the warning. If I can just beat him at running, I think I’ll be pleased,” she admitted, clenching her fist and opening it slightly. Despite being good at physical activities, she doubted she’d come close to any of the other kids in varying subjects. There were too many topics for her to be naturally gifted with them all and she wasn’t an airhead who believed her princess upbringing made her any better. In fact, it should’ve made it worse, but at least Xivi was rather nice now that she’d warmed up to the Anaxian.

Combatives ended and they were given a short recess to get more water, have a snack, and file into the classroom. The topics of the day were geometry, galactic history, and Mando’a. Sena found the academics to be simple enough, though the Mando’a she had to take a considerable amount of notes. Most people in the room could string entire phrases together, even speak it fluently, and she was putzing around in slight confusion. Xivi leaned over a few times to translate. Lunch time came and they were allowed to go back to their homes to eat with their helmets off.

“How’s class?” Paz asked her, their buir not home for lunch.

“Not bad, actually,” Sena revealed, chucking a dopey smile at her vod. “I honestly thought it was going to be worse.”

“It’s only the first day, but try not to lose that shereshoy . You might be chipper today, but you’ll get sore eventually,” Paz reminded her in good nature.

“Sore?” she scoffed. “I’m Anaxian, made entirely of sinew and muscle, wind playing through the trees, and verdant shadows. A little running and push ups isn’t going to break me.”

“ Nayc , you’re Mandalorian now,” Paz disagreed, tossing a look over at the clock on the stove. “A stupid, grinning pointy eared Mandalorian, but one nonetheless. Prove to your aliit that you’ve got a few brain cells. Oya! Don’t want to be late. Thak won’t be so nice to you if you pull that stunt again tomorrow.”

“Nice?” she squeaked in disbelief.

“You don’t want to see Thak when he’s angry.”

“He seems angry all the time!”

Paz chuckled, guiding her back out of the house as they put their buckets on. “He’s aggressive, not angry. See you after class, Sen’ika.” He gave her a slight head bump and they parted ways.

Classes after lunch consisted of marksmanship for the remainder of the day. The others were allowed to go through drills, but Nibak pulled her aside to test where she was. The sage green mando had her disassemble a few different weapons, which Sena was comfortable taking apart and putting back together. She fumbled a little bit with the coil in the buttstock of the rifle, her muscles straining as she shoved it back in, but otherwise thought she moved at a smooth pace. Not too fast, but also not dragging on.

“How well do you know how to shoot?” Nibak inquired after they went through the weapons.

“I know how to shoot a sidearm well enough, but I’m not that familiar with rifles and shotguns,” she answered honestly. There was no point in pretending she was good at it just to eat her words when placed on the range. “My buir showed me how to take them apart.”

“As he should have,” Nibak hummed, picking up the rifle. “We’ll start with this. Come along.”

Following the teacher away from the rest, who were doing dime and washer drills, they left the Junction House and headed out toward the range on the outside of the village and nestled down in a valley. Burms had been created out of soil and dirt, a line of target dummies set at varying distances. She noticed that some of them were droids, which could probably be turned on to move around and simulate live targets. Nibak set the rifle down on the block, muzzle down range, and handed Sena a cartridge.

“Start with prone, which will be down here,” she got down on her belly, propping herself up slightly with her elbows, pretending to have a rifle seated against the pocket of her shoulder.

Sena got down on the grass with her and cocked her right leg, which helped steady her balance and lifted her up. After getting a nod, she picked up the rifle, her arms quivering slightly at the weight.

She found herself struggling to hold the weapon upright, fumbling the cartridge in, before sliding the charging handle forward. Nibak noticed her struggling. "Tuck your elbows in more, you can slide down lower in order to plant more firmly." Following the instructions, Sena found a more comfortable position, her finger flat against the side of the weapon as she waited for more instructions. "Aim for the target at 100 meters and fire."

Switching the safety off with her thumb, Sena set the cheek of her helmet against the buttstock, surprised to find that the curve fit perfectly, locking into place. Her visor adjusted swiftly to the sight picture, listing the muzzle in the direction of the target a medium distance away. Drawing her breath, she squeezed the trigger at the bottom and the weapon kicked with the fire. She blinked a few times, her shoulder absolutely raw from where the high powered rifle sat. Teeth rattled, she licked her lips and glanced at Nibak.

"Good shot. Control the kick more so that you don't lose sight picture," Nibak eased, nodding for her to continue.

Sena fired a few more times before her shoulder began to shake.

"Are you alright?"

Grinding her teeth, she gave a mute nod, not wishing to seem weak, but kriff it hurt. Felt as if she'd been kicked by a bantha. Volleying off a few more shots, they swapped over to the shotgun and Sena felt herself absolutely dreading have to fire it. Leaning into her shot, her grip slipped and she dropped the gun. Nibak darted forward, shoving her back away from the hot weapon, and yanked her by her raw arm. Sena was unable to stop the howl from escaping her mouth.

" Verd'ika ! Dank farrik how much do you weigh?" Nabik hissed, snatching up the shotgun and switching the lever to safe.

Sena's hand palmed her aching muscles. "A normal weight," she muttered, realizing she was a normal weight for an Anaxian. Not a human.

"You can't be more than 30 kilos," Nibak continued to fret, realization dawning on her. "Your shoulder-"

"I'm fine!" Sena spat irritably, upset that her arm hurt and not wishing to be treated differently.

"Are you human?"

She sucked her teeth, having hoped that this wouldn't come up. Until now, everything else had been manageable, even the hand to hand combat. "No." Would Nibak pry?

"That is important information, verd'ika. Will you tell me what race you are?"

She shook her head. "Sephi offshoot," was all she could supply.

"Lighter bone density," Nibak sighed. "This will affect your training."

Her stomach dropped and she pulled her hand down. "I feel fine. I can keep going. I can-"

"Stop lying, verd'ika . Trying to push your body past its breaking point will only get you and your vod killed in the future," Nibak started, her voice hardening and becoming crisp. No longer was it nurturing or warm, Sena quailing and sitting back on her heels as she waited to be yelled at. Instead, Nibak just shook her head. "Every Mandalorian has different strengths. You will need to play to yours. You are quick, verd'ika . You will still need to qualify with a rifle and shotgun, but we will make exceptions to spread your testing out to prevent injury. Come along, we are finished for the day."

Even if Nibak had been reasonable in what she said, Sena's head sagged, trailing behind her teacher as she knew for a fact that others would notice her getting special treatment. She tried to blink back tears, but supposed that the helmet did her a favor in hiding them as they stung down her face. She held her lips to prevent her mouth from sniffling. Her first day and she'd already been sorted out and told she would be inferior in certain aspects.

The class was released for the day and Sena slunk back home, not feeling up to doing anything as her shoulder hurt. Peeling off her bucket and pauldrons, she tugged down her sleeve enough to see that a nasty bruise was spreading along the inside pocket of her shoulder beside her pecs. A frustrated huff parted her lips and she rounded, kicking the frame of her bed as hard as she could. The fit was followed with a lance of pain up her leg, radiating from where her foot connected with the steel. At least it distracted her from the pain on her shoulder.

Moping in her room, she didn't go out for dinner, hearing a knock on her door. How could she face her aliit? Word probably traveled fast and they'd know that she would never be able to wield a rifle or shotgun in an adept manner. That was a huge part of an arsenal. If she couldn't even heft a rifle, it meant she'd never be allowed to touch heavy machinery for fear of it breaking her.

The door puffed open, despite the code she had set on it, recalling duly that Paz knew it. She snatched her blanket up, pulling it up to her chin and keeping her back to the door. "Was the day that long?" he teased. "Sen'ika?"

"I'm just tired," she grumbled, her voice cracking from how parched it was from sniffling like the biggest baby in the galaxy.

"I heard you did pretty well today. Almost beat Din in your morning run-" Paz preened, sitting on the edge of her bed. "But you need to eat to keep up your strength. Even if you're not hungry, you should try to put down some of it. It's not as spicy tonight." He patted her shoulder, making her suck in a sharp breath, her body betraying her before she could purse her lips. "Wha- Are you hurt?"

Her eyes began burning again, her teeth clenched as tight as a vise grip as she tried not to cry. Why was she such a wimp? "I'm fine."

"Senaar, if you have an injury we should put some bacta on it. You still have to go to training tomorrow," Paz was definitely frowning now, but she didn't turn to look at him. "Let me look."

She grumbled petulantly, but her brother didn't move. Instead, he waited until she was done grousing, throwing glares, and then sat up yanking down her shirt to show him the darkening bruise.

"Dank farrik how did you get that?" he cursed, eying the nebula blossom against tanned skin.

"I was testing weapons with Nibak and one was a high caliber rifle. The kick bruised me and then I dropped the shotgun and she asked if I was human. Obviously, I couldn't lie or she'd think I was severely underweight. Now they're going to treat me different. I-I-I just told them I was a Sephi subrace, but now I can't do the same things as the others-" the words splattered out of her mouth ineloquently, absolute word vomit as she felt the bitter tears burn in the corners of her eyes. "I was doing so well today and then this happened."

"So?"

Her mouth dropped open and she glowered at him. "So? What do you mean? I'll never be as good as anyone else if I can only use pistols!"

"You're really worried about that?" Paz was staring at her honestly, his icy eyes snaring her gold. "What good are you broken? Your first day here and the teachers are already talking about your potential. No one is perfect at everything, this is a minor setback. Focus on your strengths. You're fast and can move silently, that's a skill most Mandalorians don't have - at least not naturally, they have to work for years to have that. In the meantime, stop beating yourself up over it. Your teachers are here to help you grow in the right direction and will tailor your training accordingly. Do you want to keep shooting these weapons until you fracture your shoulder?"

She shook her head.

"Then stop worrying," he reached up and ruffled her hair. "Want to know a secret?"

"What?" she muttered.

"I sucked at reconnaissance and stealth. So terribly that I thought they weren't going to let me attempt my Trial. You know that little stunt you pulled back in the castle?" he was alluding to when she'd stabbed the stormtrooper. "I could have never done that. You are as silent as a shadow and jumped several meters like a nexu. Dush'shebs ! You'll make an amazing kyramud one day."

"You think so?"

"I know so. But only if you eat your dinner and keep on top of your studies and practice," Paz reminded her. "Let's get some bacta lotion for that bruise."

"And food," she added, feeling a little better after Paz's pep talk.

Sena's schooling continued and she took what Paz had told her to heart. You couldn't be good at everything and dwelling on her deficiencies would just cause her to get into her own head too much. Didn't help that this Djarin kid seemed to be good at everything, but Sena tried to ignore this fact and focus on her own training. Xivi became a fast friend and her partner for most combat drills. The canary yellow mando swiftly fell in step with her after classes, where they would practice Mando'a, since it was Sena's roughest academic subject. In exchange, she helped Xivi with her running and tried to teach her more acrobatic maneuvers with obstacles. For Sena it was easy to leap, duck, dodge, and adjust on the fly - be that midair or on the ground. This agility was quickly noticed and Xivi yearned to have even a shred of Sena's ability.

It became common knowledge that she was Sephi, which wasn't entirely true, but she didn't discredit it. She couldn't fully participate in some live fire activities, Thak let her fire a few times before putting a pistol in her hand, telling her to sharpen those skills instead. Part of her desperately wanted to be able to saddle up with one of the cool ambien rifles, but her shoulder twinged in memory of how badly the initial kick hurt her. Sidearms didn't bother her and she had a decent shot, increasing her draw and hipfire with the progressing weeks.

Mornings were her favorite, hoping that Thak would make them run so she'd get a chance to try and best Djarin. The silver mando never spared her, or anyone, many words. He kept to himself and Xivi said he'd always been like that. Sena wondered why, since they were all vod and being reclusive did nothing but make the others dislike you. Did she dislike him? She didn't know him. Though the few words she did exchange with him were mostly terse and fuelled by their rivalry in fitness.

But everything wasn't sunshine and rainbows. Falling into step quickly, adjusting with her peers, and finding a niche to occupy, she swiftly saw the weakest links amongst their group. Had she not been Anaxian and a wild spirit who had trolloped through the woods, Sena expected she might've been more ill prepared than she was. The girl who had difficulty with push ups on her first day, Aya, was amongst the struggling. Her magenta bucket was easy to pick out and it was like a beacon for Thak to hone on and chastise. Sena actually felt bad for how much the girl was picked on, told to improve... but that pity quickly faded. She'd caught Nibak offering extra lessons after their final bell, only for Aya to decline and say she was working on her own. Still, there was no improvement and she continued to get reamed out by Thak.

Eventually, about two months since Sena's arrival, Thak began comparing Aya's failures to other students. Particularly her.

"Senaar has been here for two months and she's already outpaced you, Aya," he scolded as she continued to struggle with push ups. "A Sephi Nabooian has outpaced you."

She wondered if she should have been offended by the way he said Sephi, but supposed it didn't matter since that actually wasn't her race. Everyone knew she was featherlight by this point as Nibak had told them that no one was allowed to use full strikes during combatives for fear of someone breaking something. If the teacher's words were meant to be motivating, they weren't, and Sena's cheeks burned with embarrassment for both herself and Aya.

Following class, she found the magenta bucket and tapped the tall girl on the shoulder. "Aya..." she cleared her throat, trying to muster her princess voice so she was as polite and courteous as possible. The girl turned, tilting her helmet down impassively - the telltale taut and bitter line of her shoulders clear. "Xivi and I are going to do some obstacle course runs today if you want to join us. After we practice Mando'a. You're more than welcome to join us today and any other day."

Aya was utterly silent, so silent that Senu realized she'd barely heard the girl speak before. Finally, "Do you think I'm laandur ?" her voice came out hot, Sena's helmet immediately picking up on the fury in the girl's voice.

"What?" Sena squeaked, throwing up her hands in a submissive manner. "N-no, I just thought you might-"

"That I need to run more? That I'm fat and slow? That you, an aruetii , could show me the ropes?"

She had not expected this at all, her jaw dropping at Aya's harsh words. Aruetii ? Aya had called her an outsider. "I'm trying to be nice!" she screeched, her patience vanishing like smoke dissipated by a strong gale. "I never see you practicing after class and Xivi and I are always outside. I thought maybe you wanted other people to work out with."

"Like I'd choose you or Sunshine to help me. You can't even shoot most weapons. You're not exactly the shining example of mandokar . At least I can handle an entire arsenal, vaar'ika ," Aya snapped, jabbing a thick finger into Sena's chest, making her stumble back. "Let's see where all the running gets you when I snipe you across the hill."

"Kriff! Fine, forget I asked," Sena hissed dejectedly, turning away and leaving Aya to her fuming. Her own heart burned, chest heaving as she stomped back home. What the hell was her problem? Did she really think that Sena was being snide? That inviting her out was going to be nothing but a chance for Xivi and her to laugh behind their buckets? Then, on top of that, Aya had gone right for the kill and insulted her. This was the first time in her life that someone had rejected her like that and Sena was trembling with unbridled rage. Had she done the right thing? Could that conversation have gone better?

"Woah look out over here, we've got a wild mythosaur on a rampage," Paz hooted as she opened the door to their karyai and continued to trundle in.

"What do you know about that stupid pink bucket, Aya?"

"Aya?" he arched a brow, setting down his blaster that he had been cleaning. "I heard that she's having some issues with her fitness."

"I invited her to join Xivi and I after classes and she bit my kriffing head off!" She plopped down across the table, removing her own blaster, deciding she should clean it while she was there.

"Hm," Paz hummed, thinking about the subject for a little while before speaking again. "She's sensitive about it. Her buir didn't return from a hunt a few months before you arrived. It's been worse since then."

The blood rushed out of her face and she felt her ears sag slightly beneath her headband. Sighing deeply, she pinched the bridge of her nose. "I was trying to help her," she said quietly. Now Aya's reserved nature, the quiet answers to Thak, and Nibak's offer being turned down were making more sense. "I didn't know."

"How could you, vod'ika ? You did the right thing and tried to help her, but respect her decision to take the time she needs," Paz eased before shifting the subject. "So, I heard from the pipeline that your marks are quite high."

"Well aside from marksmanship since I can only really shoot this thing-" she bared the blaster which was already in three pieces. "Academics aren't that difficult and Xivi has been helping me with Mando'a."

"A humble princess? You surprise me again, vod'ika ."

Humble? Papa had told her that bragging about your accomplishments would just make people dislike you. Plus, Sena knew that school and marks didn't make up for real experiences. The real tests would be the Trials which were a few years off. She could only hope that she'd be prepared enough to make an attempt at 16. Given her comfort with the current regiment, aside from her disappointment in marksmanship, Sena was hopeful that she'd be able to make it there in time. "Not humble, just realistic," she groused, blushing at her brother's words. His praise was hard earned and he always knew the right things to say to brighten her mood even when it was abysmal.

"I wish I had that many brain cells," Paz snorted.

" Gar mirsh solus ," she countered, drawing a guffaw from him.

"Xivi teach you that one?"

"She taught me all the rude things first so that way if someone insults me, I know," she grinned, but sat back and considered what had happened. Even if Aya had lost her buir , she hadn't needed to take it out on her. Sena lost her papa and entire life as she knew it and wasn't ripping people's throats out for offering to help. Whatever. It was over and Sena had done the right thing in being the bigger person.

At least, that's what she thought.

Come morning, after their initial work out, they were paired up for combatives. Partners were switched around, so that people would be on their toes not facing their typical match up. Sena was loomed over by Aya, which was fine, all it was was grappling today. Most would just be mounting, a few tosses, and domination positions and the mats were padded. If Aya was still mad at her, she could vent her frustration and Sena wouldn't blame her. Squaring up with the girl, she knew this wasn't going to go in her favor. This wasn't free fighting where she could try and coil around Aya like a snake to try and win, it was a set of maneuvers and Aya would win because she was bigger and heavier. Heck, nearly everyone in there would be Sena except for 10 year old Terri.

Well, hopefully this goes by fast, she thought tartly, glancing over a Din and Oyiin who flanked them.

Aya lunged first, trading a few weak blows before they toppled to the ground. Sena fought for a dominant position, but was little more than a hissing loth-cat kitten as Aya picked her up by the scruff and flung her against the floor. Air whoosed out of her lungs, but Sena recovered before the girl could mount her. She rolled out of the way, rubbing her neck where she'd collided. Not a big deal. People often forgot how small she was and underestimated their strength. Aya hadn't fought with her before, so it'd be a little touch and go.

Grappling again, Sena swiped her foot under Aya, sending her thumping down and mounted. The girl twirled, asserting dominance and flipping their positions. Sena squirmed, writhing in her grip, managing to slip the hold like an eel and jump to her feet.

Thak and Nibak were across the room, correcting tosses. Back with her boots on the ground, Aya parried again and did something that Sena was not expecting. Her fingers grabbed the front of her cuirass before Aya checked her into the ground. All air was driven from her lungs and her head spun, choking for breath as a sharp whine crackled through her modulator. Aya mounted while she was dazed and pushed harder than she needed too to restrain her collar, air still not pooling in her lungs.

"Hey. Hey !"

Her ears were ringing, each blink hazy and spinning as she registered the magenta bucket casting a shadow over her. Everytime she closed her eyes, the world returned in a slow, foggy shape and Aya almost appeared as if she had two heads.

"Get off of her!"

Aya was shoved off and she was finally able to sputter, greedily sucking at air as she tried to process what had just happened.

"Didn't realize. She's laandur -" Aya was speaking, crossing her arms as if she hadn't just used an illegal toss and choked the air out of her partner.

"She barely weighs 30 kilos. What did you think would happen when you sat your fat shebs on her chest?"

"Watch it Djarin or you'll be next."

"What's going on over here?" Nibak trotted over, glancing between the boys and girls as Sena scrambled, finally able to sit up as the blood rushed back to her face.

"I'm ok!" she squeaked, not wanting to get Aya in trouble. The girl had already been through a lot and tattling on her would just make it worse. "Aya bested me. Knocked the wind out of me, that's all!"

Nibak tilted her visor toward Aya, letting the tension hang in the air, before shrugging slightly. "Be careful, Aya. You know that your vod is smaller than everyone else."

"I know, I'll be careful next time," Aya promised dolefully.

Nibak departed and the pairs split off again, Djarin turning away and grumbling quietly to himself. His wary visor kept glancing back, as if he were expecting Aya to make a second attempt to hurt Sena. With Ninak now watching with a hawk-like gaze, the lesson continued without any further issues. They were allowed their recess before moving onto academics. Whatever frustration Aya had wanted to vent had been allowed and Sena had covered her shebs by not saying anything. Again, she thought it would get better, that the girl had gotten her revenge, but found herself becoming the fixations of microaggressions.

From bumping into her desk, to pushing by her every chance she got, to even yanking on her braid once, Aya did not relent. How in kriff's name was this equal to being insulted? Sena hadn't intended on insulting Aya, so what was her problem? Come the end of the school day, she was grousing to herself, trying to walk it off and be the bigger person. Eventually, Aya would realize that she was being a brat and would leave her alone. If she were back in Genmaris, she would've punched Aya already, but she still felt bad for her. Aya was probably a nice person and was just going through a tough time, Sena could certainly relate.

"Hey," she stopped just a few houses down from the Vizsla home. Turning, she caught the glint of Djarin's silver helmet in the sun. "Why didn't you say anything? Aya has been torturing you all day."

"It's fine," Sena shrugged. "I know she's still echoy'la ."

"She choked you this morning," he reminded her flatly.

"Not difficult seeing how big I am," she brushed it off.

"What did you do?"

"I asked her if she wanted to join Xivi and I for our practice in the evening. She got rather upset, so I dropped it. She must've thought I was being contemptuous, but I just wanted to help her get her fitness up. We're all vod , we've got to help each other out," she explained, taken aback that Djarin was actually interested. This was the most he'd talked to her since she had arrived. Otherwise, they exchanged taunting rebuttals while trying to outpace one another in their exercises.

"And that warrants choking?" Din inquired dryly.

"I'm not upset. Just let it go. It's not a big deal. She'll probably go back to normal tomorrow."

"And if she doesn't?"

Sena paused, having not considered this option. What if she became Aya's punching bag to get out all those frustrations? Pursing her lips she let out a sigh, which crackled through the vocoder. "I'll deal with it. Thanks for the concern, but I'll still kick your shebs in the morning run tomorrow."

"Yeah right."

---

Also here's your translations!

Vod - Sibling/Comrade/Brother/Sister Jai'galaar - shriek hawk Buir - parent Vod'ika - little soldier/private Aliit - clan/family Su cuy'gar - You're still alive; greeting Su'cuy - Hi Sen'ori - big bird; respectful older sibling name for Senaar Elek - Yes Cin vhetin - blank slate Beskar'gam - armor Ori'vod - big sibling Alor - leader Karyai - living area/main area of Mandalorian home for eating and resting Ade - children Uj'alayi - dense, sweet Mandalorian cake Vor'e - Thanks Heturam - mouth burn; highly sought out in Mandalorian food and indicates VERY spicy food K'olar! - Come here! Get over here at once! Uur - Go Viniir - Run Shebs - butt; ass Shereshoy - lust for life that is Mandalorian Nayc - No Oya - Let's go! or lit. Let's Hunt! Dush'sebs - badass Kyramud - Assassin Laandur - weak; highly insulting Auretii - outsider Mandokar - the right stuff; for Mandalorians Vaar'ika - pipsqueak Gar mirsh solus - Your braincell is lonely Echoy'la - grieving, mourning

[glasgowkisschelseasmile]

Scandal

Pairing: Brian X Reader - Taken from @glamrockmonarch - fantastic AU concept - Thank you for letting me finish a half finished story and take a little bit of artistic license over your world! Although, it is an older Brain in the AU,I have written it that you can put him younger or older.

Word Count- 25K

Reformatted because the tumblr app wouldn’t open anything but the first and last couple of paragraphs. 

Still not working? Try this link

Please let me know what you think, feedback and comments are more than welcome! I decided not to break it up as it didn’t seem to flow as chapters or parts. Thank you to my buds who have encouraged and listened to me say for about six weeks tell them that it was nearly finished! @diamondxclawedxglove @disasterdeacy

Smut & Angst under the cut!

Infidelity. One tiny word that had caused hours of heartache for y/n. An act she didn’t commit, yet it followed her around with every step. Everything was tainted from that one moment and everything was wrong since that newspaper flew from her hands and bounced off her husband’s chest, the second he walked through the door from the school run, as screams erupted from her mouth. Four simply words had ripped her world apart.  ’Brian May Affair Exclusive’

Y/n tried to read the article through tear soaked eyes as the words seemed to float and jump along the page in her shaking hands.

‘Despite a wife and two teenage sons at home, it appears the Queen guitarist has been up to his old tricks. It has been reported he was seen leaving a hotel with a female television producer, who’s most recent work was on a documentary featuring the rocker. May was well known to have repeatedly cheated on his first wife but had seemed to calm down in recent years since marring Y/N Y/L/N- May, a popular writer and presenter some years his junior. The pair had kept their family life incredibly private and only confirmed their relationship once she had double barrelled her surname, despite reports they’d wed months before and begun dating when she was only in her early twenties. It is unknown currently how long the affair has been going on behind his wife’s back.  However, friends have commented that the scarlet woman in question had made it well known of her intentions towards the musician as she’d been previously linked to a handful of rockstar men including but, not limited to…’ “How could you!? You fucking bastard!?” She cried out as the newspaper landed open with its slanderous story on full display at his feet. Before, y/n never even contemplated she could feel pain that this; so intense and everlasting. Hours passed, weeks and then months yet those bouts of crippling agony and anger still sat within her. ”It was a mistake one night. I was feeling so bloody terrible. I’d gone just for a night to clear my head and you couldn’t come. I- I’d had a couple of drinks and she came onto me- I did not encourage this in anyway. She just happened to be there and, fuck, yes, we went back to her hotel room but, darling, it did not mean anything. I didn’t even cu-“ The slap across his cheek had burnt for hours after y/n had packed her bag and taken their two very upset teenage boys from their house that night. She was broken but they were inconsolable and furious. Harry and Fred always had been her priority and it really didn’t matter if they missed the last two days of their school term after all the photographers were trying to follow them. They hadn’t known until lunchtime when they’d bunked off school to buy lunch and the newspaper was on full display in the off license for all their peers to see. They’d ask school to call their Mum as soon as the first click of a camera could be heard. “Don’t leave.” Brian teared up at the door as y/n hunted for the dog’s car restraint. It was more autopilot than genuine thought as she walked through various rooms. “We can work this out.” “You’ve broken our family. You and you alone. Those boys have been hounded all day because I could barely get out of my home with those vultures circling to get them. They’re just kids, they aren’t equipped to deal with this. Truthfully, neither am I. Goodbye Brian.” The front door shut with a heavy thud that seemed to shake the old house as y/n listened out for anything that may indicate if it was her husband or someone else. The worst thought was the fleeting one that maybe anyone else would cause less of a sinking feeling of dread in her stomach. She heard the dog give a few barks as she jumped off the couch and then happy jumps of paws on the hard wood as she greeted her owner, unaware of the mess around her. Y/n could hear her husband cooing over their ball of fur before asking quietly where his wife was. “Where’s your mum? Hey? Where’s y/n?” Footsteps neared as his shoes where discarded. Y/n just waited to see if he’d just dropped in or really, she’d lost her precious night alone. “Hello?” Brian’s smooth voice rang through the hallways looking for his wife, but her eyes focused on the TV in-front as-if nothing was wrong. However, her nervous tick of bouncing her knee easily shone through to someone who knew her. “Babe?” Y/n was silently debating if she should answer or if she could somehow escape to take the much wanted night apart to hide. She just wanted to be alone and wallow in self-pity and sadness without worrying about upsetting their children and, truthfully, Brian further despite wanting him to know pain like she felt. She wanted him to feel his soul burn every time their eyes met, or someone patronisingly asked how they were doing. “There you are, my love.” “Hi.” Y/n caught his reflection in the mirror, a gentle smile played on his lips. Just the sight of his wife close by and in their home once more by made his heart flutter still. The three of them hadn’t been gone long but it still felt almost impossible to eat his breakfast or do anything but sob in self-pity in his bed. Just even seeing any of them in the house made his soul seem to glow and swell in adoration and happiness. “Where are the boys?” “Rog was already taking Max so offered to take them all. Harry, Fred and Max are all meeting some friends at the gig and then they asked to stay out the night. I said they could… I hope you don’t mind.” “No, why would I mind. I’m happy the boys are having a good time.” Truthfully, she was; those two had been through so much in the past few months and they deserved to have some fun rather than being self-appointed protectors of the family now. Their lives had changed the same as hers had with the whispering behind their backs and constant advice from other members of their family that hadn’t been asked for. She had watched her sons slowly harden as if the perfect bubble they thought they’d lived in had popped. Brian padded into the room with a tense brow as he lingered around, transferring his weight between his feet, until y/n forced herself to speak. ”What are you doing now with a free night of not being a taxi?” Although Y/n was desperate to get their marriage back on track, it seemed almost impossible. They’d fought for months, attended counselling and yet all y/n could hear was his voice muttering some other woman’s name. Despite how many times her husband had argued it was a stupid one time error of judgement when he was feeling so low. It didn’t take away her pain. The house was somewhere she had once felt so safe and secure. She could crumble within its walls and not need to keep up appearances but now, it felt so cold and lonely. Once where memories of her boys playing or her husband chasing her around in their early years of marriage now replaced in her mind with created visions of whispered conversations behind her back or stolen kisses not pressed to her lips. “I don’t know…” Brian scratched lightly at the back of his neck. “I was hoping to spend some time with you; without work or kids as distractions.” Hazel eyes flitted down to her knee that was jumping at twice the speed now with her lip caught between her teeth. She must really hate him to be this uncomfortable with him alone, Brian thought, and that seeping feeling of self-hatred ran around his body. “I’ve asked Rog to us three rings when they’re all home so, if the phone rings, it’s just that. I know you worry.” Brian tried to raise a smile, but he could see his wife’s gaze shifting to anywhere in the room but him. “Our therapist said we are meant to-“ “-I know what she said, Brian. I was there too.” This was one change that couldn’t seem to dissipate; her mood swings. One minute she could be laughing with her friends and then two minutes later be a crying mess with any passing thought of him or his infidelity. The tears just made the feelings of humiliation even worse; she wondered who saw, who knew what her husband had done? Did they pity her or think she was stupid, blame her even? Did her family, friends or, worse, the boys think she was doormat for coming back. Y/n tried her best not to care and push away those thoughts, but it was impossible not to. Even worse, she wondered why she was the one in tears when Brian seemed to be doing so much better. She currently just felt so alone in the world. Her family weren’t much better than the press when it came to the matter. Her mother and sister constantly reminding her they ’knew this would happen’ and ’well if he got caught once… You’ll have to bet your arse it has happened a thousand times you didn’t see.’ It depleted her energy and shattered her already broken heart into pieces.   However, when face to face with Brian, she was just livid and hurt; she couldn’t let it go that her lovely husband could hurt her so deeply and try to use stupid phrases from the therapist? She wanted to slap the shit out of him and scream in his face. They’d been told to say non accusatory words to not fan argumentative fires, but it was hard to think of it as ‘their affair’ when it was Brian who fucked up. “Can I sit with you? I just want to read a book quietly or watch something together. I just want to spend some time with my wife.” Brian’s soft and calm voice broke her thoughts as her face softened and as quickly as the anger came, it ebbed away to the amount she always carried. Y/n could see how much he was trying to be normal with her and hold himself back from pushing any situation. She’d watched his hands hover her shoulders before he left, watched their boys kiss her cheek goodbye but never pushed as he whispered a declaration of love. “I don’t mind. I’ll go if you want me to but I’d adore to just sit next to you if you allow me.” Y/n gave a slow nod, pulling her legs into her body to make herself as small as possible and adjusted the cushions to build them up around her. It was just every barrier she could possibly make, she did. In bed, once Brian was finally allowed back in that was, y/n had bought the same type of long body pillow, she’d used when pregnant with the twins, as a barrier between the two. Brian knew full well why, they were sharing a bed purely so the boys didn’t know how apart emotionally they’d become. The kids started to forgive him slowly only once they thought their mother had. “I love you.” Brian almost whispered. “I know.” Y/n just couldn’t always bring herself to tell him in the moment even though she felt it so deeply. It hadn’t helped everyone’s judgement. She could feel eyes on her in the supermarket and those hideous TV shows debated if she was stupid for staying.  The feelings of despair and sadness creeping once more into her mind as she scanned his profile; seeing his hands turn over each other with his face pained in thought. How did this happen to them? “Are you hungry? I can make you something to eat if you want.” “You need to eat too. I’m worried about you.” A hand came to rest on her ankle, thumb rubbing the bone as it had done thousands of times before. “Your running on empty. The boys-“ “Do you want a glass of wine instead?” Abruptly, y/n stood up, almost running from the room before Brian could get into any real conversation. “Y/N…” Brian rubbed his eyes in exacerbation. He truly didn’t know how much longer he could go on being rebuffed; just wanting to feel the warmth of skin on his or feel comfort from his wife’s touch. He had no right but mostly he wanted to hold her in these moments of intense suffering and be that sanctuary he used to be. “We’ve got white already open; hope you don’t mind.” Brian was still perched on the edge of the couch. His hands where clasped together and covering his mouth with elbows on his bony knees but offered a tight-lipped smile as the glass was handed to him. Y/n circled her husband almost nervously before forcing herself to sit next to him like their therapist had suggested she needed to slowly begin to let it get better. However, as Brian remained on the cushion edges, she pushed herself as deeply as possible into the fabric. This time last year she’d have probably thrown herself into his arms by leaping off the back of the couch and giggling as she almost knocked Brian off balance in their playfulness at the excitement of a full night unexpectedly to themselves. “I- I do love you, Bri…” Y/n stuttered out, surprising herself at the boldness and the relief that seemed to fizzle in her stomach. “I know.” He sighed, that tight smile still playing on his lips that meant he wasn’t really okay, and his mind was captured in painful thoughts. Long fingers swung his wedding finger around, he’d only taken to wearing it full time since everything had happened as it got caught on his guitar too often on tour and Brian had always maintained he was nervous of losing something so sentimental, of course his wife had since wondered otherwise. With another sigh he turned to y/n pulling her view from his hands to his eyes. “We’re not getting through this, are we?” Once the words where cast he had to turn back around because he simply couldn’t look at y/n anymore when the pain was this sever. Instantly y/n felt shame take over her whole body. It may have been him that had fucked up, but it was her who wouldn’t allow her mind to forget. Anytime it started to lessen, she’d force herself to remember that pain or her anxiety would flood her in droves of ‘what ifs’ and shouting that they couldn’t go through this again. Brian had tried everything; allowing her space, then coming back to trying to be affectionate physically, trying to plan a romantic weekend away, he’d even slept for three nights on the floor when y/n was convinced she could smell another woman on him suddenly but didn’t want to worry the boys with their fights. He’d even held her hand, hanging off the edge of the bed, as her tears flowed quietly. He’d cried with her but never did anything other than silently comfort his wife how she’d asked him too. “We’re trying…” y/n voice broke as she heard her husband trying to sniff back his tears. A delicate hand rested in the centre of his back, rubbing calming circles that made it even harder to speak. “How much longer can we try for?” He turned, looking his wife in the eye once more, both glossy and pained. “I’ll forgive you because I can blame myself because I know you and I know this is not how you act. However, in all seriousness, how much longer can you try for? You’re not eating, not sleeping, you’re not even writing. I know you and I know you haven’t written a single word in months.” Y/n’s eyes gazed into his hazel ones that glistened with tears finally breaking that he quickly wiped away. “I honestly think if we can’t get past this our family would be better in half than walking on eggshells. The boys have never been in trouble before this and Fred’s in and out of detention every other day and Harry? At least Fred’s angry all the time, Harry just has these huge outbursts; sometimes he can barely look at me when he’s not plastered to your side. Then he has no problem staring me down every chance he gets.” “I don’t think he’s exactly to blame for his little pops at you. I’ve always said you weren’t laid back enough with them-“ “-I just want them to do well. I push them because they’re clever lads. Don’t tell me how to parent my boys when you know it’s not about me being strict with them. I want the best for them… which is why, I don’t know if this situation is the best for them. And I’ve done this before, I know how much it rips your soul in two to not wake your kids up for school every morning. I love doing that. I treasure being a dad so much but, we- we need to face facts that it’s not good for them and it’s not good for you… I just want what’s best for you and I want you to be happy and I will just have to accept that it’s not me anymore.” “We’re all really trying, Brian. It’s a hard age for them regardless of what’s going on between us and all their friends know what’s happening. They haven’t really got anyone to talk to; they won’t talk to me at all about their feelings anymore… I don’t like how they’re getting so tall; I can’t hug them like I used to… It’s starting to feel like hugging you when you were all bony and skinny with your ridiculously long limbs…” The circles getting stronger into the tense muscles of his back before slipping under his shirt. Her tears too not quite holding back now. She missed his warmth so deeply but couldn’t bring herself to accept tainted skin against hers anymore. ”You do make me happy. The times we’re good, we’re great. Even since everything. I know how much you try, and I will keep working for you. They don’t want to be split up from you. I know how hurt they felt when we went straight after it happened. I know because they told me. They wanted you there… even I wanted you there sometimes.” Y/n and Brian somehow found the strength to pull themselves together with tears being wiped away. She wasn’t lying, y/n had realised when she’d instinctively turned to roll her eyes at their boy’s antics of trying to wrestle in the surf. Y/n wanted to see her husband smiling at them all, then having to makeshift some clothes for the drive home when they were freezing and wet. That was the night she knew their relationship was worth saving. She’d packed their bags at midnight and driven into the early hours to get home and found her husband, sporting a scruffy peppered beard, crying quietly looking at the array of family photos in the living room. The boys hadn’t ever let anyone, not even admitted to each other, know of the relief of watching from the stairs as their parents sobbed into each other’s arms and a thousand apologies whispered into each other’s shoulders. “I wanted to be with you.” Her fingers found a tight knot at the base of his spine and her thumb began to press harder until she felt it start to come apart. It was natural, something she’d done so often but with being so touch starved it made Brian close his eyes with a gulping sigh of contentment spreading throughout his body, but it just seemed so wrong after all he’d said; he felt unworthy. She dried her cheeks again, even though the tears ceased they still seemed to be pulling at her face still. “Why don’t you take them out for a day? I’ll stay here so it’s just you three. Buy their love and affection if you must, spoil them a little bit. They’re good boys and they deserve some time with just you. They won’t worry so much then. Do whatever weird man things you boys do when I have to stand in a music shop for hours whilst you get hassled, the bit before I give up and look at book shops or anything but people telling you how great you are.” Y/n rolled her eyes in jest but Brian could reel off a handful of occasions that had happened to them both. “You mean the bit where the boys somehow load up a basket of everything they want to try and somehow it goes onto my credit card?” “Yes, the bit when they take advantage of you being forgetful and telling them your pin codes or ability to forge your signature.” They both chuckled as their souls seemed to warm up just a little more. That was part of the reason both Brian and y/n tried so hard to keep things together. Duct tape the cracks till it looked seamless to anyone but them. It was just since that time they’re relationship had become so volatile, both could be prone to the odd flair up or picking a fight but it seemed out of control some days and on the flip side, they could be happy and jovial over dinner until he’d tried to initiate any romantic or such alike. “They’re little buggers sometimes.” He took another sip of his wine and placed the glass on the table. Brian gave a feeble laugh, looking over his shoulder at his wife who was scrunching her nose in that way that was purely her. He winked at her as he spoke. “They get that from you.” “And they get their obsession with collecting from you… I’ve been thinking…” y/n tapped her foot nervously again and picked some nonexistence fluff from her yoga pants. “Maybe we should go away like you’d suggested. A change of scenery might do us some good; just us. R/W/N or my parents would probably look after the kids and the dog.” “I’d love that.” Brian spoke as another wave of relief washed over him as he dared to place his hand over hers on her thigh. He gently squeezed in sincerity as his smile opened for the first time in days. “I’d really love that. You love Paris or is that too cliched?” “I wouldn’t be mad at a weekend in Paris or Florence or even somewhere completely new. Anywhere with you will be lovely.” Desperately they were both trying to have some sort of semblance of normalcy. They’d frequently slip in and out of the state, but it did seem to be getting slightly more often and longer periods. It was okay when life was busy, work, calls and two kids to rush around meant they could at least pretend everything was normal for small periods of time. It was the nights that things got more complicated; when they were forced to be alone together. Y/N would sporadically still touch Brian, but he could feel how forced it was. She’d even occasionally grimace, and they hadn’t had a proper cuddle in bed since that night before the news had broken. Memories of that night sometimes where all that kept him going. The thoughts of soothing touches and kisses had ran around his body as she softly whispered sweet nothings and positivity in his ear all night. When he showed no signs of being able to sleep, even in the small morning hours creeping around them,  she’d taken him between her lips and into her hand and blown him until he was a quaking, sweaty mess under her. y/n realised now Brian’s initial reluctance to do anything physical since that weekend was his overpowering guilt but that night he’d clung to her desperately as he tried to find some hope and solace. He’d rocked his hips into her as one hand roamed his body with soft hums and Brian’s hands tangled in her hair as he whispered, as loud as he dared, about how loved she was. It all seemed so cheap mere hours later. They’d done all the therapist exercises, Brian admitting that it was his fault and his alone, validating her feelings of pain and betrayal and trying to picture a future together. The book said to picture grandkids and enjoying retirement, but all y/n could see was an empty house and loneliness. When she’d told the therapist, she’d simply said to think of next Christmas, what did that look like? Truthfully, y/n had no idea. She wanted to see him, and their boys surrounded by her stepchildren and growing number of grandchildren throughout the years but any time she felt like they were moving forward, another wave of sadness hit her and knocked her down again. Brian shuffled back, relaxing into the cushions with his hand on her thigh still. It was just instinctive impulse that caused her to close the gap and press her lips softly against his temple. “I miss you. I miss your touch. I miss your lips.” He muttered as his eyes fluttered shut but felt his wife edging away from him. “Babe, I’m so-“ “Shush. I know.” He watched her glass be placed next to his before leaning back and tugging a dumbstruck Brian back to her. His back against her chest and her hand holding his and the other coming to pull his forehead back to her lips. “I know. I just… I just look at you and I see- it’s so stupid- but I see marks on your skin. I look at these lips and I see horrible lipstick stains. I look at your beautiful eyes and wonder if you even want to see me or are you imagining someone else. Do you even want me physically anymore or are you here to save face? I see the boys and I think about how you didn’t want more children and I did, so we had them. What if you blame me for trapping you? Are you here because you think you have a duty to us or something silly like that? Do you want to be with someone else? Do you want her?” In one minute she’d said more to Brian than in months. Let him know her worries and concerns and Brian could feel the quick heave of her chest as her leg started bouncing again. This time, however, he reached forward and took her ankle in his hand before pulling it into his lap and wrapping her body around his before turning to look deeply into her eyes. “You are my world with my children; every single one of them. Never, ever doubt that you didn’t give me one of the greatest gifts you ever could. I fell in love a thousand times deeper and more intensely when those little nuggets were placed in my arms. I didn’t even know I could love someone any more than I already loved you. I’m not here because we have children. I woke up one day in how ever many years and made a mistake. I wake up every morning and remind myself what a fucking idiot I was, and I try my damnedest to try and fix the pain I caused you and the kids.” Brian  sighed as he tried to hold himself together and squeezed her calf muscle to centre himself. “I love you. I always have and I always will. Only you will ever be my wife, I promised you that on our wedding day and I hate myself that I broke a vow because I didn’t ever think I would. I was so low, and you were so busy, and I fucked up. The same way you feel like I don’t want you physically; that’s how I felt… fuck, how I feel.” “How could you even think that?” Her brows knitted together in confusion, until the affair she’d always been very affectionate to him. Always peppering kisses and nuzzling into his body when they’d curl up together. “Because look at you and look at me. Maybe when you were in your twenties and I had some semblance of a rockstar-“ y/n quickly cutting off her husband before he went down a rabbit hole. “Hey, I didn’t meet a rockstar though. I met a lovely guy who wanted to talk about animal rights and the night sky, and you duped me with this rock god bollocks.” “I duped you?” He shook his head away from her as he tried to discreetly wipe away the stray tear that fell. “Yes. I didn’t want some rockstar wanker. I wanted some nice absentminded man who knew about interplanetary dust and ate far too many pastries but had no idea where his wallet was and left his house keys on my kitchen table even though I’d reminded him quite literally the second before to take them. I loved that about you when we met. I loved you coming back and convincing you to stay again or the way you’d tell me a million theories by people I had never even heard of; about things I never knew existed. I loved you for you.” That last statement hurt. He’d spent far too many nights with women that wanted him to be who they thought he was and didn’t care how he felt or were willing to spend any time on anything other than just fucking a pop star. Even from their very early relationship, y/n had always taken care of him. He doubted any of his onetime bed partners would even know his middle name or favourite book. ”What a stupid fool you’ve been…” Brian thought to himself. “That’s still me but I’m older to say the least, my hairs turning colour and my body aches in the morning. I’ve seen the way other men look at you; I’ve quite literally been pushed aside by men to talk to you before. How can I compete with guys your age? Look at me.” For the first time in months, she did. Brian carried a little more weight than when they met but he looked healthier to y/n now, not so thin or eating that dreadful diet of whatever someone had left in the fridge or he could get delivered.  He had more wrinkles but so did she, the lack of sleep wasn’t helping either of them and, yes his hair had changed colour multiple times till it faded to grey but his eyes. His eyes were the same hazel with tiny flecks is green that shone in the light or whenever he was excitedly talking about a subject. They still turned deep and self-reflective when he was saddened by something. Whatever had changed physically it hadn’t changed a single thing about how she felt about him. He was still utterly handsome and when he’d wield himself around on stage, he was still sexy to her. How could he not recognise her utter admiration to every part of him? “You’re so very handsome, Bri. How could you even begin to think I didn’t find you attractive or interesting anymore…” Y/n was taken aback as she replayed so many times, she’d brushed him off even before the mistake. The new book had taken nearly all her time and energy and the nights she’d creep off to write in the darkness or when Brian would softly ask her to take a break or just that he was down, and she’d not been there for him. That weekend y/n had blamed Brian for disappearing off but she’d also remembered how the boys had shut their doors and battled each other with loud music and she had sat downstairs with headphones on to drown them out; no wonder he felt his only option was to get some peace and quiet and that bitch had prayed on him. He’d fucked up but the pain and regret was evident in everything he’d done since. She should have marched upstairs and pulled the cables to the twins’ speakers or made Brian stay and take the dog for a walk into the town and have lunch together. He should have stayed, and they should have talked this out months before any issues had arisen. Maybe some of the guilt she felt was internalised, if she’d had taken that Sunday afternoon on Friday, if she’d have baked his favourite treats and wrapped her body around his in the hazy sunlight, maybe, just maybe he wouldn’t have done what he did. Y/n fingers ghosted his cheek, Brian’s eyes locked to hers moving around his face and body. She leaned forward, lips pushing into his ever so softly it almost felt like smoke dancing along his skin soon to slip away. He knew not to push, to relax with a soft hum of appreciation. Her heart seemed to reform slightly as she felt his shoulders relax but could feel his lips just holding back from what he really wanted. With passion and force, their kiss grew. Maybe the words couldn’t express how she needed to be back with him but hopefully some romantic attention could. Y/n caressed his sharp jaw with her thumb and Brian reciprocated. His long and delicate fingertip ran over her pulse point, feeling the strong thud when his hand splayed around her neck with a tender and gentle touch. Brian’s hands relaxed their grip when he reminded himself to slow down. He’d gladly accept anything his wife offered no matter how short. Savouring what he believed to be the last fleeting moments with her lips on his. Y/n’s weight seemed to shift around him, her leg pushing further across his lap and Brian gave a surprised whimper when he felt his wife wrap her arms around his neck and lower herself into his lap. “This okay?” She asked as his hands remained in mid-air but their lips never truly parting. “I just wasn’t prepared.” “Why aren’t you touching me?” She mumbled against his lips as their noses rubbed together in a change of sides. “I didn’t know I was allowed to.” He admitted before taking her hips with a squeeze. The thin T-shirt had ridden up and exposed her lower back which gave Brian an opportunity to touch her skin. She was almost so warm and soft; exactly how home felt. One hand fell lower daring to press under the thin material of her yoga pants and give her ass a playful grasp. She allowed his hands to roam her body feeling wanted and safe in his tight hold. It felt so wonderful to be here once more. They both melted into their lover, moaning into each other as her tongue slipped across his bottom lip to deepen the kiss even further. Her hand draped around his shoulder and into his open shirt to feel the intimate skin of his chest. She’d missed him so dreadfully and it finally felt like they were reclaiming their marriage together. “You really do have a fantastic arse.” And that simple statement of praise and Brian’s attempt to make her feel attractive instantly caused a sink in her gut. Had he said that to someone else? Was he comparing the two women? Had he felt that bitch up like he touched his wife? Then she could feel it; that cheap red lipstick staining her lips from his. A powerful shove from her palms to Brian’s shoulders knocked him back into the cushions. He was shell shocked; how could everything flip so drastically? Change so quickly? He watched his wife begin to pace around the room with wide eyes as she shook her head and once again avoided looking to him directly. “Darling, what’s wrong? You’re worrying me. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you, but I can see how much I have.” He jumped up and tried to place a hand on her chest and back and rub calming circles like before, but it just made it worse. She screamed at him to not touch her and Brian just stood dejected and feeling as if he was taking up far too much space in her world. It was back. The red hotspots as she was calling them. Sometimes when she looked at her husband, she could almost see glowing patches of skin where he’d been unfaithful. Holding someone else’s hand, had she kissed his chest like y/n did, tickled her tongue along his stomach until he squirmed or bit his neck in pleasure as she held his strong hips. “No, no, no, please no.” She crumbled as her knees started to give way and her hands come to wipe the flowing tears. That’s when y/n saw it. The bright red glow on her own skin, could feel the heat they generated, every place his hands or mouth had laid where suddenly burning with memories and created visions of his betrayal. She wiped her lips with the back of her hand as if that would somehow help but her head was spinning. No other thoughts could process in her mind other than Brian’s unfaithfulness and how his skin and soul had been polluted by another. All she could think was how he was transferring everything to her; making her unclean and defiled too. “Why did you do this!? Why did you allow yourself to be tainted like this?! How could you do this to our marriage, Brian?!” “Darling, you’re having a panic attack. Look at me.” Brian was kneeling down next to his wife, eyes of pure concern as her chest shook with deep sobs. He tried to hand her a drink, but she couldn’t bear to place it to her lips. “I just can’t stop thinking about you… doing that- something so personal and private with someone else… with her…” Another fresh set of tears broke down her cheeks as her body screamed for air turning her voice weak. ”You left our home to be with another woman, Brian! Not on tour, not away in the world. You left me… for her.” The guilt was already steadily tightening a knot in his gut. His poor wife was broken, she’d been his greatest support and champion and he’d repaid her by doing this. “I’m so sorry.” Brian sniffled with his cuff pressed to his nose, knowing he had no right to cry and swallowed down his own tears. “I truly am. If I could take this back, I would. If I could do anything to take away your pain, I promise you, darling; I’d do anything. Keep breathing. Place your hands to your face and deep breaths.” Y/n did as he instructed and thankfully the actual attack was relatively short-lived from what she’d been experiencing recently. She hadn’t had anxiety attack’s regularly since she was nineteen. Before this had awful mess had happened, Brian was always there for her. He’d place a hand over the centre of her back and chest and shush her until she felt less claustrophobic and then he’d pull y/n’s body gently to his chest and enclose her in their own little bubble. Brian was y/n’s security blanket, a protector against the world and whatever scared her, but never did she think it would be his actions that could terrify her to the core. “I will never, ever fuck up so fucking badly again. I’ll spent every waking second of my life trying to make this right if you want me too. If you want me, that is. I worship the ground you and our boys walk on already and that will never change. Regardless of your decision. You’d never have to worry about money or anything such as that either. I’d make sure you got what you deserved. I’ll stand aside if you want me to.” Y/n hadn’t seen her husband cry over the situation much since she’d come home, he’d tried to be strong, but she could so often hear small sobs from behind closed doors or see how red his eyes were in the middle of the night. However, as he spoke those words he never imagined having to, he looked like some poor and broken man whose clothes didn’t fit and emotional pain physically manifested in his lithe frame. “Nothing can ever change how much I love you, y/n. You’ll be okay always; I promise you’ll get back to being happy soon.” “Just hold me.” Y/n was still so pained and emotionally raw but just maybe the attack had subsided as soon as Brian was close and calm. The ice-cold burn in her lungs subsiding slowly as her chest still felt like fire to touch. She needed him, as much as she wanted to deny it. Her thoughts from the last hour all swirled in her mind as she tried to focus on Brian in front of her with his soft voice of pure sincerity. Y/n reached out, taking his hand in her own and placing it over her heart. Without having to be asked, he started to rub soothing circles. Brian’s other hand moved to gently encourage her head against his own chest as he peppered kisses to her hair . It could have been minutes or hours, neither would be able to guess a time as Brian continued to whisper comforting words to her. “I want to take a shower… I can still feel everything on me. I just need to be fresh right now. If we’re having that conversation. I need to feel okay at least.” Y/n said as Brian groaned standing up, hissing in pain. “Just my knees. Don’t worry.” “I told you not to kneel so much on the cold floor. You’re too bony for that…” “Don’t worry about me. Y/n… I want to schedule another therapist appointment for us. Set of appointments really. I want to get back to however normal we can become.” “I do too. It’s just this feeling of-“ Y/n began at scratch at her arms to show what she felt. Brian just waved an understanding hand. “I know. Go shower and I’ll see you soon.” Almost on autopilot she went upstairs but began to strip off her clothes in the hallway to rid herself of one layer of bad feelings at a time. Brian sat back down completely unnerved at how bad it had truly gotten. How could he have missed such a thing? Every step forward felt like three back. He’d been so overjoyed just have her and the twins back in the house that everything else just seemed to pass him by. He gave a long sigh that racked his body with exhaustion and began to absentmindedly play with the ring on his finger again. When they’d gotten married it had meant too much to have something on his hand, something so small to show the world that he wasn’t such a mess anymore. Show the world he wasn’t walking alone anymore. Wherever and whoever he was that day, somewhere in the world someone was waiting for him, thinking about him and caring about his despite the distance between them. Gradually they both took their rings off for a plethora of reasons. It caught on his strings or the diamond band flashed the camera strangely when she was presenting a segment. At first, they’d both been unwilling, Brian would slip his on another finger for the tour and y/n would swirl the band around but slowly they both became accustomed to not having that little bit of precious metal on their person more and more. Plodding with leaden steps, he pottered into the kitchen; letting the dog out and then setting on making her a snack, still concerned about the lack of care his wife was taking of herself and it was all his fault. Upstairs y/n was doing almost the same thing as Brian, contemplative and alone in the shower, but eyeing the diamond wedding band sat neatly on the shelf as she washed the shampoo from her hair. She only wore her rings when she went out now, just to not allow any news outlets to try to drag out the already well worked affair. bur Brian had not taken his off for a moment during the recent months, but y/n was still so deep in denial of her feelings that it only served as a reminder of what had happened. When they’d gotten married it seemed so serious and grown up to walk around with a wedding band holding down her engagement ring, she’d play with it all the time and if she was deep in thought she’d tap one ring against the other until her husband would wordlessly press his hand over hers when it had sufficiently irritated him. There was a knock at the ensuite door, shaking her from her thoughts as Brian spoke. “I’ve brought you some toast and a drink up. By the bed. This is fresh out of the dyer.” A pristine towel was unceremoniously dropped through the gap. “I’ll sleep in the guest room.” “It’s not very late, Bri.” She said with a frown hearing the depletion in his voice but getting no response as the bedroom door closed with a small thud of frustration. Brian was stood outside looking at the wall of family pictures and achievements that lined the hallway. The kid’s certificates and his gold discs with their degrees in between previously captured memories. He smiled as he looked between his favourites, only putting them back up when she agreed to come home, their memories far too painful for the month without his wife and younger children especially when his older ones could barely bring themselves to acknowledge that he may be pained too. Lovingly, he stroked his most treasured one; himself, y/n and all five of his children at a after show party. They all looked so happy, Harry just over taking their sisters in height then whereas now the twins where both eye to eye with Brian. His girls had their arms around his wife and Brian pulled both his youngest and eldest son close with Fred kneeling with a cheesy smile plastered across his face and his mother’s hands on his shoulders. If only Brian could go back and tell himself to savour every second and never take them for granted. “What the fuck did you do?” He muttered and turned to go to the guest room far away from the bedroom he wasn’t sure he could still consider his own. Y/n watched as the suds ran over her body, removing all the marks left on her skin from Brian and anyone else. Regardless of how irrational she knew the feelings where they just couldn’t always be shaken away. She knew that nothing of that night would remain anywhere but his mind however, she wasn’t thinking rationally in those moments of utter pain. When they’d first started dating, it seemed a privilege to have Brian’s touch or something of his on her. He’d left his watch on her bedside table and she’d kept it safe on her wrist for two days before he’d come back to retrieve it. She liked being able to see a little reminder of her then boyfriend. Times had changed but still a large collection of random tour hoodies and his vintage T-shirt’s where still her favourite thing to lounge around in and when he was away on tour she’d press her face into the old fabric and breath in that scent that was just him. It wasn’t, however, the same as being able to lay on his chest or nuzzle into his neck from behind whilst he played guitar. That hadn’t happened for months though, hadn’t allowed herself to wrap him in an embrace wholeheartedly but Brian had desperately tried to comfort her or just have that intimacy. He’d try putting his hand on her knee in the car or trying to hook his little finger around hers like they used to when they sat somewhat near each other on the sofa once. Y/n wasn’t to blame for what Brian did, but she also had to saddle the responsibility of getting her marriage back on track if she indeed wanted things to get better. When the therapist had asked about their sex life since, Brian had brushed it off as ‘Fine, all things considering.’ However, she had sat silent; how could see tell the man she loved his touch made her skin crawl because she somehow thought he was covered with his mistress. They’d gone over every detail; she knew what and how it happened but the doubts where still there even after his unbridled honesty. It was now or never. She had to do something before he gave up trying, and y/n feared he was tittering on the edge of the precipice. It was apparently normal to be turned off from sex, but y/n made every effort to avoid even gentle touch and love but when she did accept it. It made everything melt away for those precious few moments before the memories hit like a tidal wave. ”Sometimes it’s just like he’s tainted. I can’t touch him without feeling that way too. I feel dirty and unclean. I instantly want to wash it off.” Y/n said as she sat quietly tucked away with Rogers/w/n in a small wine bar weeks ago, both their eyes scanning the street or bar for cameras or people listening in. “Do you feel he can wash it off? Realistically nothing left now, I know he’s not lying when he said about it being a onetime accident. Roger would know if it happened on tour with him and you know everyone on his solo tours and their families. I don’t think you wouldn’t know if something else had gone off…” “They’re on his payroll. Of course, they’d lie because he’s putting food on their tables. I wouldn’t blame them.” “But if you still see these…. these things… Have you heard of revenge sex? Claiming what’s yours. Make him yours again. I know it’s difficult, but I’ve seen how broken he is, admittedly I’m not talking to him or pitying him in anyway, but I know what he’s telling Rog and he’s devastated. You both need each other to go forward.” “You’re starting to sound like my therapist.” Y/n rolled her eyes as she swirled the wine in her glass. “She thinks that revenge or claiming sex isn’t good to start with, but she thinks I need to make more of an effort, I can tell that’s what she means. We’re going out and when we talk, it’s great, I know he’s honest and I don’t really question his loyalty to the family but the moment he wants to kiss. I just think about the fact he’s kissed someone else. He’s done even bloody more than just a kiss. It wasn’t even like he was on tour and it just happened. He left our house to be with her. He could have said no. A few glasses of wine? Like that’s an excuse, he knows I’d have picked him up if he’d have called.” Y/n’s friend had just sat there and pouted in thought, letting her friend speak. She hadn’t gotten y/n to really open up at all, only flashes of emotion before someone or something would take their attention. “I want to be able to accept him back like before, but I- I just can’t…” She took a large gulp of her drink, avoiding her friends’ sympathetic eyes in a bid to not cry again. “The therapist suggested a spa treatment or showering together because it’s personal and private… relaxing but I don’t know.” “Because you were obviously not freaky before.” R/w/n teased and rolled her eyes which raised a small laugh before her friend covered her hand with her own. “You’re paying a small fortune, try what she’s suggesting if you can. Don’t even say about the boys, you know I’ll have them any time.” Y/n took a deep breath as she stepped out the shower and wrapped the still warm towel around herself. Purposely she walked to the other side of the bathroom. She took her wedding and engagement rings and pushed them onto her finger to where they are meant to sit. It warmed her soul, she’d admit, to feel them again on her own terms. Tenderly she brought them to her lips, kissing them with a thousand resealed promises. “Brian?!” She called for him as she scanned the bedroom and into the hallway but only the dog gave a brief bark from one of the boys’ rooms. Briefly she glimpsed their wedding photos even more determined to somehow make this fade into the distance. Her steps where brisk as she caught the sound of the main shower running and the open guest room door. “Hi.” Y/n breathed into the steamy room, breaking Brian from his thoughts and pulling his head away from the tiles but keeping the soaped wash scrubber in his hand. “Are you okay?” He asked concerned to why she’d come to him. “Is something wrong, love?” Y/n gave a gentle shake of her head, a hint of a smile on her lips. “I love you.” She spoke definitely and honestly. “Can I join you?” Brian was understandably taken aback, he’d only really gotten in the shower as a way to waste some time before the inevitable time he’d have to retire to a bed that wasn’t his own and fight his body’s natural want to be awake but the pain of sitting alone in his home was too great on his heart to bare. “Yeah…” Unashamedly her towel was dropped and kicked to the side of the room with a confidence rooted more in ‘fake it till you make it’ than anything else. However, her husband was wide eyed and breathless as she slipped around the shower screen and pulled him into a chaste kiss. “I want to make this work. I really, really want to get through this rough patch.” “Me too.” He whispered as y/n draped her arms around his neck and pressed their bodies together under the streams of hot water. Brian instantly pushed his face into her shoulder, kissing any wet skin his lips could land on as his arms circled around her waist so tightly. “I love you so much.” Hazel eyes were forced open, gazing at the curves of her hips and dimples on her back; he tried to memorise every dip and sweep of her flesh that he’d taken for granted just in case he didn’t get the chance to do so again. “I know you do… Stay with me tonight.” Y/n turned her face, pressing a long overdue kiss to his jaw. “Stay in our bed. Please?” The thud of her heart was noticeable between their chests as her nerves grew. What if he said no? Brian smiled tight lipped, almost like a nervous teenager, nodding as his cheeks grew pink with a blush of happy energy radiating through his body even though he’d claim it was just the hot water. With a deep breath she reached behind her back, taking his hand and the shower mitt before bringing it up to his face and brushing the soap over his mouth, cheeks and jaw line. The red marks weren’t there but she pictured them fading away like the exercise had said, each one of them being soaped away with each pass of her hand over his neck. Y/n watched the red turn pink and then be washed away as he tilted his head under the water, his usually wild curls somewhat subdued. “Is there a good reason you’re trying to water board me?” Brian teased y/n before she rolled her eyes with a simple nod. She forced her hand lower; looking over his scared stomach before her hands travelled back up his lithe chest. The mixture of soap and water made his skin slick so y/n’s hands could easily spread around and rub at whatever area she wanted to be hers again. “You are mine, aren’t you? Only mine?” Brian nodded; they didn’t need more than necessary words in this situation. His chest was next, running over every bump of his ribs from his sternum to his waist and feeling the rise and fall of his breath from underneath. “Yes. Only yours, my love.” She needed one reassurance and only alone. His stomach was so badly marked from being young, she couldn’t even contemplate having to watch him go through so many seriously illnesses back to back. Y/n always admired his emotional strength and drive to get better in such dire circumstances. Circling his hips before dropping lower to massage the soap around his long legs, kneeling before him as Brian kept much of the water from hitting y/n. Even though his legs carried almost no muscle, he always had these perfect curves and soft lines of definition. Y/n had to say, the blessing of that first hot summer together had caused her so many distractions when they’d laid out in Brian’s garden to escape the heat of the city. It was so perfectly private for their burning passions for each other. They’d barely worn clothes for those days and anything inside seemed an impossible task. He hummed as fingers pressed into and massaged his calves. “That feels really quite nice.”   A gentle kiss fell to his knee, still red from kneeling so long downstairs. She moved to his thighs, looking up at him through wet lashes to see his eyes half closed and his lips holding a smile. Brian took the soap in his palm, sweeping it over her shoulders with so much care and attention. Neither of them had to speak as his slender fingers massaged into her shoulders till, she moaned out and closed her eyes, thumbs digging into his thighs with a gasp. They never felt pressured to always be talking, many years of love and kinship meant they could communicate on so many levels together. Cautiously sweeping quickly over his crotch as she stood, focusing on his reaction, but his soft moans and bite to his lip awaked something almost forgotten within her. The wash cloth was released from her grip as she allowed her hand to dance along the hot skin of his hip bones causing his breath to catch and his eyes to close as the back of her hand brushed against his length before slipping it fully between her palm and instantly feeling pulses of excitement start to throb. “Don’t-“ He pushed her hand away just slightly as his pent-up sexual want bubbled at his surface and fogged his mind. “Kiss me.” It came out as a small, desperate whisper but Brian needed no explanation or further instructions as he dipped his head to connect his lips to his wife’s. The pressure was strong and consistent, but it wasn’t meant to be sexual, any emotion or connection he tried to pour into kissing her and ignore the ghosting touch to his twitching cock. It was y/n who opened her mouth slightly causing a gasp to vibrate through her lips before a long groan. They picked up where they left off downstairs with little gasps and moans and his hands squeezed her hips but as he went to use the path of the water to slide down her to her bum, he remembered and instead just rubbed a small path up to her waist. “No. Touch me.” She murmured before kissing him deeply again as a thousand locked away feelings flooded their minds so almost nothing could come.  “I want you to touch me. Can I touch you?” She asked but Brian just gave a long groan and nodded before kissing her again. Her soaped palm glided over his sensitive weights before taking his semi hard shaft and teasing it with a light and slow jerk of her hand. “Oh god…” Y/n waist was possibly Brian’s favourite part of her body. Hourglass curves where definitely his new weakness for y/n. Brian kissed her again but pulled away, looking deeply into her eyes as his hands stayed situated and hers continued to tease his hardening cock. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” Y/n whispered, pushing onto her tip toes to kiss Brian’s cheek. It just felt so sensual and perfect to have her husband back without the pressure. She needed to go forward and remember why they fell in love, why this all happened and how badly she needed him. His eyes trailed her body, barely speaking as he gave her a gentle squeeze. “You’re so beautiful and, gosh, I love this waist; you’re so perfect. I love being able to hold you by it when we’re out at parties or just getting coffee so everyone knows your mine.” “I’ve always been yours and you’re mine. You are mine regardless of anything else.” Brian kissed her cheeks in return as the emotion almost broke her voice. “When else… I miss your voice. I miss you.” His usually agile mind was clouded and fogged with intense desire. “When I make love to you…” Brian almost blurted out with a long moan but earned himself a reassuring kiss to his jaw. “or when you wrap your body around mine and you make love with me,“ he kissed the shell of her ear. "so I know you’re mine or even when we can’t wait, and I fuck you hard and fast. I’ll lock my hands onto your waist and pull you into me, so you know you’re mine.” Y/n gasped at Brian’s words, so teasing and tempting and yet almost alien from anything she’d heard in the last few months. All she knew was her mind was screaming for everything in that description. She wanted to be around his body as they melted into each other and the rest of the world and the utter bullshit it contained drifted into insignificance. “Make me yours. Remind me who’s I am. I want to be yours again.” Brian’s lips were attacking his wife’s before she’d even finished speaking, his knees dipping to her level. “Come be mine. I want you back.” “You’ve already got me. You’ve got me always.” His mouth left hers with his hands coming to her cheeks and forcing their eyes to lock. “I love you. You know that, don’t you? Forever and a day.” Y/n nodded, pressing three short kisses to his lips as tears threatened to bite at her eyes. ‘Forever and a day’ such a simple statement but to them it held so much. He’d said it when he proposed, when they got married but he’d first said it after a fight shortly after they’d gotten serious. Brian was worried about their age gap and the intense public scrutiny of y/n and their relationship and y/n had taken it so personally about herself because she didn’t see an older man when she looked at Brian. She saw someone on her level. However, to him, in that moment he was trying to save them both time and his heartache when the novelty wore off, pressure became too much, or her parents decided they hated him and eventually she went home with a sob story. “Forever and a day.” He repeated, holding her jaw as if it was delicate glass that could snap at any point and leave his fingers cut to ribbons. Until she too whispered the words just loudly enough to hear over the muffle of the shower water bouncing off the tiles. They were desperate kisses and she willed her mind to keep her focus on her husband not allow anything but excitement to creep into her thoughts. The fear that it would all end with anxiety still weighting at the back of her mind. She prayed to anything or anyone who would listen that the advice would work. Y/n took a hold of her husbands’ thick forearms moving his hands along her waist and hips to her thighs before dragging his palms to her chest.   Brian too had his own nerves about pushing his wife or the ever-creeping doubt she simply didn’t find him attractive anymore. He was so incredibly apprehensive to just be touching his lover as he’d been rejected too many times to the point it felt almost like she hated him. Their old life felt like a distant memory of happier times and burning flames of excitement. “Brian please…” She whined. Calloused hands cupped her breasts with his thumb just brushing her left nipple as y/n squeezed his bicep with a small moan. “This okay?” He muttered against her cheek as his wife’s hands slid up onto his shoulders and pressed them even closer together. “Oh, fuck yes.” A soft mouth attached to hers before moving along her jaw and down her neck. She melted whenever his lips were working the column with soft nips and the effect had most certainly not died. His thumb worked her nipple into a stiff peak as his fingers got involved in pinching and mildly rolling it between his rough fingertips. Her eyes closing involuntarily from the combination of her husband attention and craving to get out of her own mind. Brian’s tongue stiffened and licked along her collar bone before moving down the centre of her chest with a drawn-out gasp of his name. He moved to kiss and lick the underside of her ignored breast with his hand sweeping down her side to gauge her reaction to touching her full arse, Brian’s mouth attached around her nipple with a deep groan that vibrated through his lips. “More.” Y/n gasped as her back arched and pushed her tits out even more. Finally, the apprehension was starting to fade as they fell into step with each other. His fingers knew exactly how to draw on her skin as hers knew the pressure points on his neck to squeeze whenever he hit a perfect spot. Time seemed to slow down as they’re touches sped up with Brian’s mouth crossing to take her other bud between his teeth until his wife was wrapping her thigh around his hips in need some friction with moans that reverberated around the tiles. “Why don’t we take this to bed?” He said, voice deep and dripping with honey.   Without an answer, her mind too full to form words, shaking legs backed her body out of the shower before wrapping herself in the forgotten towel and picking up the warming fresh one from rail before holding out for her husband to step into. For the first time in a while she wanted to take care of him like before, there wasn’t any edge of pain or sadness as he chuckled roughly with the towel stroking over his face and ridding the droplets of water that had fell from his hair. It felt like a dream, like it could all crumble in a second for Brian and into a nightmare. It had done before. Whenever he felt like he was finally getting the light back into her eyes, something would change and then the world would collapse in on her; just leaving two people stood with broken hearts and no way to console each other without further pain. So easily could this feeling of jubilation from just her touching his chin fly into reminders of what he’d done. He let y/n lead the way down the hall and pulling him into their bedroom. She turned to him with a wicked smirk, as she flicked the bedside lamp on, her confidence evidently growing as she threw the last thing covering her naked body to the side. Brian’s jaw dropped once more causing a warming sensation of pride to run through her chest and cheeks. Lips connected back together with smirks and gasps as hands began to roam skin that was untouched for so long. Y/n ran a finger down the centre of his chest to the deep scars on his stomach feeling the muscles of his abdomen tense and shiver under her barely there touch. Nerves and anticipation grew in both their stomachs as a sensual kiss deepened into something far more passionate. Almost silent gasps and moans ran between the two. They could both write a book on the other; for example, all she had to do to get Brian in the mood was softly moan as she kissed his neck and chest whilst he read a book in bed and y/n knees would go weak if Brian pulled her leg around his hip and ran just fingertips along her sensitive inner thigh until a shiver ran down her spine or if his teeth nipped her bottom lip if he’d give her a pseudo innocent kiss and her a teasing slap to her behind; especially effective if it was a routine task she was doing or a seemingly bad time. Namely, either them had to leave the house shortly and she still had about twenty thousand things to do that afternoon. But she loved it, being taken over the sofa or wherever they were in the house, both their clothes just moved up or down enough to get access to their lover. She craved that wanting back; wanting him to take her again and just wanting to be taken. Brian the same, he’d take just being back in the bed for now, but he wanted to complain when he read and reread the same page over and over until he gave in and felt her triumphant smirk all over his body. Y/n gave her husband a gentle and encouraging push towards their bed. They’re lips continued to move together as he pulled y/n with him as he sat on the edge of the bed with his partner falling into his lap with a muffled giggle. Trying to force his back into the sheets, her husband gave a slight shake of his head before roughly yet playfully flipping her onto her back. “Oh, that’s how this is going to go, eh, Mr May?” Y/n was trying to sound teasing, but it just came out as an aching whine when her chest heaved for breath from wild mental overload of the last hour. “I believe I was starting something in the shower and I’d quite like to finish that, Mrs May.” Fingers danced along her ticklish sides as she squirmed under his touch as his mouth dragged and the connected to her hip. He licked, sucked and bit all over her lower stomach and sharp hip bones over her mound and along her thighs. Every minuscule movement caused either a gasp or expletive to leave her lips as her fingers tangled into the sheets to not distract Brian from what he was doing. It wouldn’t have mattered anyways; he was far too lost in teasing her. He needed to feel those little spasms of her muscles or pushing her most private area off the bed as he continued to get closer to actually having his mouth there before kissing back to her neck. Y/n instantly started to try and push his shoulders back down, groaning in his ear quietly about how much she needed her partners touch. Just as her back arched and tried to grind herself against his thigh Brian, shifted to lay next to her and his hand ghosted down her stomach. Long fingers parted her sensitive lips as he groaned and felt the wetness already pooling at her entrance. Holding her apart with his index and ring finger his middle dipped at her entrance and dragged the fluid upwards to gently stroke over the hidden shaft of her clitoris. Brian watched his wife’s eyes close tightly, her back arching at the barely their touch as she pulled his face to hers and began to moan against his lips as her hips rutted and moved his finger along herself. “Don’t tease me. I can’t take it.” Y/n all but whined causing a low rumble with a hint of laugher to rise from Brian. She always was so needy, another day, when they’d reconnected fully, he’d tease her, tie her to the bed and really make it tortuous. “I said I wanted to be yours. Make me yours like you promised. I want it. I need it, Bri.” The smallest and softest kiss was pressed to her lips, barely even any pressure before he was sliding off the bed and onto his knees on the discarded towel. Brian yanked y/n with a surprised squeal towards him with. Strong hands pushed her thighs over his shoulders and massaged the tension he found. “As you wish, my love.” He peppered kisses and soft licks to her inner thigh and y/n pushed onto her elbows to take in the scene before her. He looked absolutely fantastic with his wet hair and eyes blown with lust as he teased his lover. A playful tongue flicked along the tendons were her legs melted into intimate skin before dropping more kisses anywhere but where she craved him. A gasp ran through her throat as she breathlessly begged for more. “Please. Please. Please, baby, please. Baby more.” Brian let the words float for a moment, hearing her almost pathetically mewling for him. He’d craved this for so long and now he wanted to savour every second; memorise every line or movement and taste against his lips. A long stripe was licked along her lips with a flattened tongue, instantly rewarded with a hiss and squeeze of her legs. Y/n looked down to her partner with a moan as she brushed a drying curl out of his eyes. Using a smile of bliss, she gave him a confirmation which made butterflies erupt in his stomach, as their eyes remained locked his tongue pointed and opened her before pushing his face between her legs with a satisfied hum. Hot and wet, his tongue began to tease circles around her pulsing bud. Y/n was in absolute heaven her mind was clear of everything but their little sanctuary and neither her hand nor vibrator had come close to getting her this aroused as he could. She could feel the slickness ever growing and mixing with his saliva as he closed his eyes and head shook as he licked her like the best thing he’d ever tasted. His hand had her locked down across her stomach, gripping her hip so hard it would almost certainly leave bruises as she entangled her fingers into his hair to keep that much needed stimulation. Y/n’s eyes fluttered shut as his tongue hit a partially sensitive spot, but she caught her own scream with her teeth digging into her lower lip. Brian’s keen ears heard the change of tone and he looked up to such a beautiful sight but god he needed to hear her moan his name again. His hand left her hips allowing them to instantly be bucking to his mouth more and pulled her lip free. “I want to hear you. Be as loud as you want, my darling.” He smirked, before pressing back to suck and kiss her clit feverishly. “Inside me. I- I want- holy fuck- your fingers inside me.” Without thought he pulled back earning a long groan of annoyance before he sucked his finger into his mouth and sat back on his heels to see her entrance dripping for him. “Babe?” Y/n asked as she saw his jaw go slack and doubts filled her suddenly. “You’re so unbelievably wet.” Two fingers went between her sensitive inner folds as his fingers coated themselves with the thick arousal and his wife moaned at seeing her husband so deeply engaged with her body. “So wet for me. Your little clitoris is throbbing, darling. Can I put these in you now?” Frantically she nodded with the heel of her foot digging into his back with wordless pleas. Y/n dropped herself back fully into the downy sheets, no longer able to hold her body up with the tension ripping her muscles.   Both of Brian’s fingers circled her hole and his arm slipped back around her hips to hold her in place as the moans grew in volume. He had the best fingers, as if they were made just for y/n. They were slender but so long and his touch could flip from gentle and sweet with whispers of love and admiration falling from his lips to roughly finger fucking her with unmentionable fantasies being grunted in her ear. The two digits began to push inside of y/n each knuckle being squeezed, and his movements held until her opening relaxed around him to take a little more. “Just fuck me.” She groaned trying to flick her hips under his strength. “I don’t want to hurt you. You’re extremely tight… again.” He smirked at the last element to his statement. It did all feel strangely familiar yet new and exciting just as it did when they first met. “I can hear you being a smug bastar-“ Her voice cut off as Brian’s thumb reached out and began to flick her clit when he was fully taken in. “Smug, you say?” He laughed and received a small kick of pleasure or playful annoyance; he wasn’t going to question either way. His mouth connected back to replace his thumb. Y/n instantly began to arch off the bed, her legs tightening around Brian’s still damp hair and locking her ankles in the centre of his shoulders to aid her rocking herself against his tongue. “Fuck! Brian!” Her moans were so loud as she arched for him and his feet shook slightly in pleasure against his back. It didn’t take much of his fingers curling into her tight heat to have her shaking on the edge and with loud moans. Y/n reached one hand above her head to grab the sheets and the other to force her fingers between Brian’s on her hip. Her knuckles where white as his thumb lovingly stroked hers in contrast to the hard and precise flicks of his tongue as he wrote a thousand promises against his wife. He promised to be true, dedicate every moment of his life to her and be on his knees for only her; whatever her needs. “Keep going. I’m close.” Brian’s efforts ramped up. His fingers moving as fast as possible as his chin was cupped in his palm and feeling the deep groans through his jaw as she started to clamp down to almost pain on his fingers. “I’m going to cum… I’m- fuck- I’m-“ A long moan left her mouth as her orgasm took over. Y/n had Brian clamped by her thighs and her nails were surely digging into his hand enough to leave imprints as he tried to keep enough contact to work her through her high and draw it out as much as possible. Long fingers continued to curl inside of her, rubbing the rough area of her gspot, as she spasmed around them and his tongue sucking and licking any bit of wetness he could. “Fuck! Sensitive.” She muttered with her eyes still tightly closed and her lip pouting out as she pushed his mouth away from her. Brian was panting just as hard, not that he realised how he was struggling to breath, until he wiped his face; making his wife cum was far more important than air tonight. He hadn’t had a release yet but his mind had equally blanked on anything except for how her body writhed in ecstasy, how her rib cage exposed itself as she gasped or the pornographic moans falling from those beautiful lips mixed with the sweet taste against his tongue and steady pooling of her down his fingers and into his palm. “Hard one?” He asked, kissing her inner thigh and his fingers softly pumping in and out of her perfectly pink centre. Y/n could only just about muster a nod. “Been a while, hasn’t it, darling?” “Too long.” Y/n said, she didn’t really have much to say for pillow or dirty talk, but she loved to listen to his soft voice asking or saying the most perverse things. “Do you feel like mine again, my love?” A sharp nip to the tender skin making her whimper. “Yes.” She whimpered. “If I could, I’d spend every evening between your legs. You taste so beautiful and feel so incredible. I just love devouring you. I’ve missed doing this to you so badly. I crave you like no other, my love. I love you so much, but no one physically has ever had me like you. You do understand that it’s you for me. Always.” “Forever…” y/n squeezed his hand, their wedding rings knocking together almost symbolically in the moment with no other sound. “I know. I know. I don’t doubt you.” Brian kissed his way back up her body but keeping his fingers inside of her in a want to be one with his wife in every possible way. However, she gently pulled away his wrist and moved further onto the bed, both of them on their knees as they kissed and held each other’s hips. She could taste herself on his lips, but she wasn’t ashamed to moan out. He was finally hers, covered in his wife and no one else. The red spots didn’t concern her anymore because they didn’t exist anymore. He smelt like home; his aftershave, her perfume and fresh country air. The past needed to be put to bed for both of them; they needed each other more than ever before. Y/n let out a small yelp as she pressed her hips into his and felt an already raging erection. “And what would this be?” She grinned, stroking his length ever so slowly. Brian instantly groaned, his lip between his teeth until her index finger pulled it loose. “Ah ah ah. I want to hear you.” Y/n dropped onto her elbows in front of him, moving her body to be across his, allowing him access to spank or touch her, as she took the already red and leaking tip of his cock between her full lips. He tasted as he always did, the sweetest she’d had but easily the biggest, meaning she could never take him close to fully. With innocent eyes she looked up, seeing his expression already tense as she slapped the head of his cock against her tongue before pushing as much as she could between her lips and wantonly moaning. The sadness may have momentarily passed but the situation still felt different to how it once did. Brian’s hands didn’t immediately come down on her or sweep her hair away to up his visual. She wondered how he felt in the moment; he was trying so hard to reassure y/n but it wasn’t lost on either of them the last bit of sexual contact they’d had she’d dragged his orgasm out whilst encouraging him to use her mouth for his own pleasure. Brian’s guilt was ever consuming him to the point he couldn’t allow himself to be sheathed inside of y/n knowing how he’d betrayed her. In her mind, she would do anything and everything she possibly could to help him be happy. She was his wife after all and although she would never describe it as her duty to pleasure him, if she could fuck him into some relief and sleep, she would. “So good… baby, so perfect…” “Bri?” His eyes opened as he helped his wife back to her knees and their arms wrapping around each other. “Yes, my love?” He asked, brushing her now dry waves with creeping concern at his wife’s sudden demeanour change. “What’s wrong?” “I just need you to promise that you mean this? You mean tonight. I know it’s silly, but I just need to hear it.” Her eyes reflected conflict and pain in them both only his where blown dark with arousal. “I love you. I want you. I need you. You’re my wife. You’ll always be the love of my life. It’ll be work but I will do whatever you need… Shall we cuddle for a while?” He was already motioning to lay down but the words of her friend and therapist rang in her ears. “I’d love to cuddle up with you, my darling.” ’Claim him’  “I can just ride you for a while?” Brian didn’t know what to say, his jaw loose as he somehow murmured a confirmation. He didn’t need any help, but she still jerked his cock a few times to take it back to its full hardness. He’d always felt incredible in her hand and the power to make this tall, handsome and strong man crumble to whimpers was joyous. Y/n sat astride her husband’s thin thighs as she moved her hips to brush along his length caused an unbridled hiss from Brian when he felt the first bit of heat. Her confidence was one again starting to reform. Her hands fell onto his chest as the head hit her still sensitive clit. “We don’t have to-“ he whispered, brushing back stray hairs as he watched her face intently. “Yes, we do.” “I’m more than satisfied making you do that. I don’t need-“ “I do. I need to do this. I need to make you…” Slowly y/n sank down onto his length with a long moan. “Inside me. I need you to…” It felt like when they first started dating or he’d go away on tour; that familiar stretch of how well-endowed he really was. “Fuck.” It took all his willpower not to flip the positions and fuck her with every fibre of strength he could find but the tightness, the wetness and the emotions combined. His mind was drowning in overstimulation and he knew he couldn’t possibly last long. Rough hands where like magnets to her waist now, encouraging the slow grind as he focused all of his being into her. “Just like that.” Brian whispered as his wife’s hands clawed lightly at his chest. “You feel so perfect, y/n.” At the utterance of her name, her cunt gave a sharp squeeze to his cock. That’s what was missing, she feared somewhere well-hidden it wasn’t her he pictured when he closed his eyes. Her hips sped up just a little bit, longer strokes as she rode him. “Promise you love me?” Her manicured nails dragged across his chest leaving pink lines on his pale skin as her hips rocked fully at speed now. It broke his heart to have to tell her something she should indefinitely know. “I promise… This is how I love seeing you, y/n. What keeps me going on the road and those dirty videos you send obviously help.” Y/n gave a small smile but closed her eyes in pleasure starting to build again. “I’ve missed you around me so much. You have no idea how wonderful it feels for the one person you love to have you literally inside of them. We’re one, you and I, y/n.“ “I love you. I love you so much, Brian.” Her voice was desperate, broken as she chased her release and tried so hard to claim his body. Their hips rocked together with breathy moans and Brian brushing both their untamed locks from their faces. “God, I can’t wait to feel you cum on my cock. Can’t wait to pound into you and feel you tighten. You say my name prettier than anyone ever could.” Unexpectedly, she moved from his length, on all fours as she waited in the middle of the bed. “I want that. I want you to take me hard. Make me scream your name. Use all your body on mine.” Brian scrambled into his knees with his hands magnetised to her cheeks as he laid out a heavy slap. Her form jolted forward with a moan being dragged across her lips. It wasn’t their usual sex but the freedom to be loud was never something he wanted to let pass them by and in these situations, he couldn’t refrain from doing so. “Sorry.” He muttered, dropping an apologetic kiss on her back. “Don’t be. I liked it.” Lining his already wet cock with her entrance, Brian took a deep breath and reminded himself to take his time knowing how it was all be over far too quickly. He ran himself through her sensitive folds as little whimpers of approval cascaded from y/n. Her face was tightly scrunched and pushed into the duvet as her hips pushed back searching for more stimulation mixed with the incredible feeling of fullness that only Brian could bring her. Another harsh spank came down to her cheek, his fingers rubbed the area; he wanted both to cause it to redden but also caress and tease his lover. “Punish me.” Brian’s ears just about heard the weak murmur. “Why?” “I’ve not been a good wife.” “I’ll punish you for putting yourself down only.” He lent forward dropping a chaste kiss to her shoulder as his hand gave another burning slap to her hot skin which only made her hiss and groan further. Brian’s hard cock slipped back inside of y/n as she pushed herself onto him. He let out a deep groan as he indulged himself by holding her open and watching his glistening cock being bounced on as her lips and opening dragged around his shaft. ”You’re so perfect.” He whispered. “So perfect for me.” “Yeah?” Y/n mumbled and got onto her hands with closed eyes in hopes of freeing her mind again. “Hit me again.” His large hand covered most of her cheek as she groaned from the pain slowly turning into pleasure. “Fuckkkkk…” y/n collapsed forward again but reached her hand behind her, clicking her fingers until she felt his palm against hers. She moved her hair to one side and bit into cover underneath her in pure pleasure. “I love you. Only you.” It felt electric, their bodies crashing into each other’s as Brian didn’t give her a moment to adjust before he was slamming himself deep within her. Y/n could do nothing more than moan and rock in time with his set rhythm, but she could hear his low panting growl and knew he was just as into this as her. He crushed her hand in his and lent forward to use her shoulder as a holding point to use even more force in their desperation. “Feels so good.” She whimpered under her husband’s strong hands. “I want you to cum in me. Do you feel like I do?” “It’s about to feel even better. Come here.” He whispered, pulling y/n’s arm and shoulder until she had her back pressed against his chest whilst he peppered kisses to her shoulder and exposed neck. “I want to be with you. Make love with me, baby. I’ve missed you with me.” Brian’s left hand took a hold of her jutting hip bone and his right looped her body and turned her flushed face to his. He pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of his wife’s mouth. Her husband knew how much she enjoyed positions of this variant, always in the shower, or a quickie when they were on a time schedule. She loved how easily he’d stimulate her g-spot and how deeply his cock would press into her and the intimacy of his hands having the full play of her body. Brian couldn’t lie and say it was fantastic to have his wife whimpering under him as he toyed with her clitoris or breasts and could suck and bite into her neck and feel the incredible tightness around his shaft. Y/n couldn’t wait however, pushing his fingers towards her aching wetness. Brian mewled in her ear as he found his fingertips once again brushing between her soft lips and feeling the hardened nub twitch under his tight circles. “Fuck… just there.” She moaned as their hips met in perfect, rehearsed rhythm. The tightness around his cock was elevating and make it almost impossible for Brian to keep time as he bit into her neck with a groan. ”I’m going to cum… Fuck, Bri, ” she whimpered once again and grabbed onto his hair to pull their cheeks together. Hot breath fanned over her skin as she listened to get husband moan her name as he slammed into her and tried to hold back his own orgasm. Pressing a kiss to his cheek she whispered for only him. “Cum with me.” Both their efforts on each other amplified; her bouncing and arching her back and the sharp snap of Brian’s hips against her backside with his hands pulling her even to him. He groaned and grunted about how much he loved her, and she started to almost scream his name as the tight knots in both their stomachs began to grow and tighten. Y/n kept her head turned to kiss any part of his face she could and give him a show by squeezing her own nipple to intensify her bodies reaction to him. Y/n started to clench around Brian’s cock, seeming to beg for his orgasm. As much as he wanted to hold off, he simply couldn’t as he opened his eyes to the curve of his lovers body, her hand on her own breast and his between her legs with her hand squeezing his wrist and the other tugging deep in his mass of curls. “Yes! I’m so close… Cum with me please!” She moaned breathlessly as she felt his thrusts become erratic and the warmth of relief starting to spread from her centre. Her thighs tingled as her climax fully took over her body, hips spasmed as she loudly moaned. Orgasms halted any thoughts but of them reaching their peaks together. Her cunt claimed his release with every pulsating squeeze of her muscles as her hips took over the movement of sliding up and down his twitching length as Brian moaned quietly and kissed his wife’s neck as she tugged his hair with the last ebbs of her orgasm fleeting through her body. “Done. I’m done, babe.” y/n whispered, kissing his cheek as she pulled away his hand that hadn’t stopped the consistent circles on her clitoris. Usually he’d be far more in tune with her, but y/n could tell her husband was in the final grips of his own pleasure. Brian’s eyes were closed as he felt himself finally stop shooting inside of her walls. They’d both surely be painted by the load he’d fucked deep within her. Both stayed wrapped up and gasping for breath enjoying bathing in the afterglow after so long. Brian loved her how her body felt, all warm and pressed against his chest, her shampoo scent and the taste of her lips in his mouth , how he could feel his seed already dribbling down his shaft with her juices was downright unexplainably incredible. He nuzzled into her shoulder, his arms tightly around her waist with one of hers on his cheek and the other onto of his arms, as he laid gentle kisses anywhere, he could. Part of him never really knew if they’d ever experience this feeling together again. “That was amazing.” He muttered as he smiled softly at his wife’s kisses falling against his cheek bone and tilted his head around to deeply kiss her. “You know, you’re the only thing holding me up right now.” She gave a feeble laugh, but she wasn’t going to do anything to change it. “I feel like jelly.” “You just feel nice to hold.” Brian’s honesty and squeeze made her heart bloom, small, broken pieces gluing back together in her chest. It was slow but it felt like she had gathered each tiny bit in her chest to allow them to come back and each one still had his name stamped on them. “Let’s get cleaned up.” “I can’t stand Brian, let alone shower. That’s what you do to me.” He placed a few kisses to her exposed neck, whispering things she couldn’t make out. Y/n hissed slightly in overstimulation as he pulled himself out, his load already starting to fall as Brian moved away and helped her to lay on weak limbs. Y/n saw her husband open his bedside table, a mystery in recent months, and pull out a set of wipes and turned his body away from her view. Quietly he cleaned his fading erection and wiped down his thighs from her juices. Honestly, he wouldn’t have cared but he knew she would. “Can you just come cuddle with me already?” Y/n whined as her eyelids were already heavy with the want to be embraced and sleep soundly for the first time in months. “Just spread your legs first.” “Kinky.” Brian bit back a laugh with a roll of his own eyes when he went to push open her thighs and take a fresh wipe over her mound. The coolness made her gasp and then Brian couldn’t hold back the groan of watching his wife so exposed and her pussy swollen, pink and covered in him. He certainly did not want to take that little bit of himself from her body and neither did she. He was allowed to clean her ever so gently and lovingly. “That stopped your back chatting pretty quickly.” A hand moved to Brian’s stomach, pushing him away slightly but her thumb caressing along his hip bone. “I’m exhausted stop trying to get me going again. Come be a gentleman and cuddle.” Brian shifted his weight over his wife to ‘his’ side of the bed and yanked the covers out from her legs before draping them over both of their naked bodies. He flicked off the bedside light to blacken the room. “I don’t want to fall asleep yet…” y/n muttered already drowsy, her eyes closing and opening slowly. Fingertips held her chin as he slowly kissed every part of her face before pressing an affectionate kiss to her lips. “Go to sleep. You need your sleep, angel.” He knew neither of them had barely slept in months, so he passively allowed her to manoeuvre his body onto his back and one arm around looping her shoulders and the other clasping their hands together on his abdomen. Her head rested against his chest, occasionally kissing just above his heart as she fought to stay away until she felt Brian’s breathing turn slow and deep. The shrill ring of the telephone on her bedside woke y/n with a jolt. Brian groaned, squeezing his wife’s body currently being spooned against his. “Take it off the hook. It’s bloody late.” Angrily he muttered with a full rasp to his voice. “Hello?” Y/n pressed the phone to her ear without even opening her eyes fully. “Just in bed… Yeah it’s- Jesus- three am. Of course, we’re asleep… One second,” she knocked the phone into Brian’s shoulder. “Roger wants you.” “Seriously, what do you even want at this time?” Brian was certainly not a morning person. “Just letting you know all is well. Back home. Bought your kids a burger rather than that rabbit food you insist on feeding them.” Rogers voice was teasing as he put together the various scenarios in his mind. However, he couldn’t lie and say it wasn’t a weight of his mind for his friend’s happiness. “Thank you…” Brian yawned, rubbing his eyes but also hearing Rogers knowing smirk through the line. “I’ll pick them up tomorrow lunch time, I guess. I’ll do the taxi next time.” “Have fun… Sleep well.” Brian threw the receiver back onto the bedside table. With a long sigh, he wrapped his arms around his dozing wife, but he knew sleep wouldn’t claim him again. Yet he stayed huddled up under soft blankets with naked skin against his pressing a loving kiss to her ear. They lay in each other’s embrace with Brian’s watching the red numbers of the alarm clock change in hopes of falling asleep. “I can hear you not sleeping.” Y/n groaned and rubbed her face into the sheets. “Bloody hell…” “Can’t sleep now either?” “No… but I’m happy just laying here for a while…” Y/n rolled in his arms, her face instantly nuzzling into his slightly stubbled neck with a sigh. “I’ve got to get up.” Brian whispered as he kissed the top of her head but received a needy groan. “I’ll come back soon. Tea and then back to bed.” “Fine, you owe me breakfast in bed.” “Breakfast of champions.” Brian muttered cheekily just loud enough for her to be able to decipher what he meant after a few moments thought. He received back a slap to his shoulder with a giggle as y/n pressed herself deeper under the warm covers of Brian’s side. “Dickhead.” Brian slipped from under the covers, careful to make as little noise as possible until he had the bedroom door shut behind him. He grabbed his plaid pyjama pants and soft sweatshirt from a tour long gone by.  Standing on the landing, his fingers ticked over his chin with a huge grin breaking onto his face. Utter disbelief and over whelming happiness ran through his every fibre as an unusual spring in his step happened as he started to descend the stairs. He couldn’t, however, resist the urge to hop back up and peer into the room. His wife looked ethereal; hair covering their pillows as the sheets tucked around her body but kept her shoulders exposed and one small, purple bruise on display. “Stop watching me sleep, you weirdo.” A breathy laugh fell from his lips, drumming his fingers against the door. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to…” “I’m up now. I couldn’t go back to sleep anyways. Make me a tea to apologise still though?” “Sure thing.” Brian tapped the door one more before flitting to the bed and pressing his body over hers. Y/n’s arms circled her husband’s neck with a contented smile as she pulled him into a long, chaste kiss. Y/n stretched her body, pushing her hands into her now dry hair, delightfully rolling her body against his; he kissed along her now exposed neck as he moved away. “I’m just nipping to the bathroom to brush my teeth.” Y/n shook her head at her husband’s little quirks. Almost instantly when he was out of bed, he had a toothbrush in his mouth. She’d missed those little intricacies so incredibly much, but she hadn’t realised how deeply until now. “My hair is so tangled; do you have a hair tie? Even if you were definitely on my wall at university, I didn’t think I’d marry someone with hair to his shoulders.” “No bobbles in here. Try your dressing table and then try the bedside draw. Might be some kicking around in there.” Brian shouted as he tried to wrestle his own matted curls, before wandering back through the bedroom, throwing her silky grey robe to y/n as he strode confidently to the hallway. “Anyways, would you rather I’d gone bald?” “Oh, certainly not. You’d look so incredibly… weird. You’d look even more ridiculous!” Y/n grimaced at the thought as she heard Brian’s brisk footsteps down the stairs. Herself, she went to use the bathroom, to look around and rinse her mouth with mint mouthwash, she loved Brian but his ability to miss something clearly in front of his face was unprecedented. She had a quick scan around but nothing that would even begin to be able to be repurposed. Back in the bedroom, the nightstand top was fairly clear; his book barely read, the bedside lamp with a small covering of dust, alarm clock and random trinkets Brian played with before sleep that she barely understood what current obsession they were linked too. She pulled open the draw; pushing aside the wipes and could stop the small blush rising through her cheeks at the sight of a new bullet vibrator and small bottle of lubricant. “Well someone had hopeful plans…” y/n muttered to herself with a giggle. Then the box at the back of the draw caught her eyes. An open box of condoms with a strip of foils already hanging out. She clasped a hand to her mouth in shock as her body started to shake in adrenaline, annoyance and furious anger burning in her spine. Y/n yanked the dressing gown belt tight around her waist as she pulled out the box and ran downstairs. Brian was in the kitchen, already lent against the worktop as he waited for the tea to brew. He rubbed his tired eyes with a long yawn before the box flew into the centre of his chest. Brian, looking down at the purple packaging at his feet and then to his wife glaring at him across the kitchen table. “What the fuck are these?!? Why the fuck would you have condoms?! Do I repulse you that much?! You don’t even want to be against me? Are you fucking her still?!” Tears starting to streak down her face as he stood completely immobile. “Did you fuck her in our bed?” “No-“ “How many other people have you fucked whilst we’ve been together? Are you still messing around behind my back? Oh my God, I’m so stupid!” “No.” He sighed in desperation as y/n turned with a frustrated groan towards the door. “Get out.” “No!” In just three strides he was blocking her exit door with his body, hands holding her shoulder as he looked into her eyes. “I didn’t know if you’d want to use them. I was just prepared for every situation.” “Oh really?!? Where the fuck has the first strip gone, Brian? You cheating fucking cunt. Get out of my way.” He held her fast as she tried to squirm from his grip. “I have three sons. Two are teenagers. I watched my best friend waste away and die because he caught something, and I would have a million hideously awkward conversations to make sure they know that no one’s going to panic or berate them for having contraception. I asked their brother to just say that they were there, just in case.” “Where?” Y/n challenged him as the revelation shook her to the core. She couldn’t fully trust her husband yet, but she wanted to believe him but the horror of her babies becoming men was a thought she could not comprehend. “Boys bathroom cabinet. Behind all that crap they put in their hair.” Their eyes remained locked as she searched his for any hint of lies. “Go look if you don’t believe me.” Y/n knew she shouldn’t, it went against everything their therapist and friends would advise but she still found her legs moving her quickly up the stairs and into the bathroom. It was always disgusting with wet towels on every inch of floor but all her eyes, still shivering with anxious tears, could focus on was that horrible mirrored cupboard. In the left-hand lower corner was a jammed section of products all half covered in their contents in a vague attempt to hide the glinting purple behind them. He wasn’t lying. Y/n let out a heavy sigh from a caught breath as her eyes closed in humiliation to how stupid and quick to assume she’d become. Another fleet of autopilot had her legs walking back downstairs. “I couldn’t sit back and, they’re not by the way, but… if they did, god forbid, catch something or got some girl pregnant. I’d barely be able to live with myself. You always thought they were too young, so we just kept it between us four. I’m sorry. It was my mistake to lie by omission.” Y/n turned to see Brian lent against the door frame, his forehead was tense but he had that look in his eye when he was being open and truthful, even if it hurt. He didn’t speak about his son’s namesake, Freddie’s illness almost ever, and y/n trusted he’d never use his friends passing as an excuse. “I’m so sorry.” Y/n slammed her body into his with her arms instantly locking around his neck to keep their embrace. The force took them both back a step into the kitchen.  “I should have thought. I saw the other things in that draw and I put two and two together and got four million. I’m so stupid.” Brian stroked along her hair. It may not be what he’d thought would happen and far from perfect, but he still wanted to try and earn her trust. “No, you’re not, y/n.” His stubble scratched y/n’s forehead as she rocked on her tiptoes trying to be close to Brian’s height. “Shall we write this one down to experience and move on?” Y/n nodded as he squeezed her body with a comforting rock. “How can you be so calm and forgiving all the time, Bri?” “The same way you can; we love each other. I want to be with you.” “I will learn how to trust you again. Until that happens, if we can’t be normal for a while, we can, at least, be a stable relationship. Stability to start with. Build up.” She whispered. A statement made just as much for herself as her husband. Brian held her hand as they walked silently back into their kitchen as he tried to hold a routine domestic conversation about changing the colour of the dining room as they sipped their tea sitting next to each other at the kitchen table. “There’s another in the pot if you want it?” Brian refilled his own with the steaming cup between his fingers. “Finally going to send me to sleep, I hope. Might watch a bit of tv to try and bore myself to into napping until morning.” “Will you take me outside to look at the stars? Use your fancy space vocabulary and romance me like when we were young.” he could tell his wife wasn’t happy, the way her bare foot tapped on the titles with a small slap and the words she did say, rushed from her mouth. However, he’d still do anything to make her happy; if it was possible, he’d find a way to do it. Wordlessly, Brian stood up, holding out his hand for y/n to take. “You have no clue how happy you saying that has made me.” “Promise?” It was barely a whisper as she slipped her hand into his much larger one. “Promise.” He brought her fingers to his lips to seal that promise. Brian pushed his feet into those horrible clogged shoes he insisted on wearing that made him even taller. The next thing on her list was almost certainly to try and buy him some more trainers or something he could slip on and off that wasn’t those bloody awful shoes; god forbid anyone ever introduced him to gardening crocs. “Footwear?” Brian asked, stopping on the patio step as his wife made no attempt to cover her bare feet or grab anything warm. “Jumper? Trousers? Anything?” Y/n shook her head with a low snicker, grabbing two thick blankets and folding them over her arm instead. “You can keep me warm, hot stuff.”  Brian rolled his eyes as y/n pressed herself along his side. “Cheeky lady. One second,” Taking the blankets in one hand, tea in the other, he jogged as quickly as the fast shuffle of his feet would allow with his shoes dragging to place his tea down on the small table next to the hanging bench just on the start of the grass lawn. She didn’t know quite what he had in mind but the way his eyes lit up in the harsh light was utterly beautiful. He wore happiness the best of anyone she’d ever met. “Right, Mrs.” Brian pulled one of his wife’s arms around his neck and then bent his long limbs as one arm circled her torso and the other another the scooped her body from under her knees. Y/n couldn’t hold in her joy filled laughter as strong arms almost effortlessly lifted her bridal style towards the swing. “Was this what you had in mind?” Brian smirked as she attempted to pull the silky gown down in the breeze and his warm hands held tightly onto her thigh. “Not exactly. This is quite a lot better however.” “So, I shouldn’t just drop you then.” Y/n squealed as he threw her slightly in the air just enough to jolt her body and drag her nails across his neck. “Shouldn’t pretend drop you.” They continued with spirited screams and Brian tickling along her covered sides in complete control of his lover dragging every step out to take his time. Her laugh was his favourite record that was rediscovered years after he thought he lost it. “Okay- Okay- stopppppp!” Y/n wiped away a tear of laughter from her cheek.  They were acting like love dumb teenagers, but they took full and intense pleasure in every laugh, touch or jovial squeal. “Brian Harold May, put me down nicely!” Her husband was never one to follow instructions to the letter so instead sat down with his wife still in his lap with her exposed legs laying out against the cool wood. “I love you.” “I love you more.” His hand crept up her thigh but only to caress the soft skin lovingly as he gazed into the night sky and she into his eyes with a thousand tiny reflections of stars. “I am sorry about that whole thing in the kitchen… It was foolish to react like that.” Brian placed a hand over her knee, rubbing the tension away with his delicate touch before moving it silently to cover her hand. “It’s okay. It’s something we can work on. Be ridiculous to not imagine little blips along the way… I’m sorry that upstairs was rough. I didn’t want it to be like that. I just… I sort of had a vision of just worshipping you and it being incredibly romantic and loving; candles and massages. The whole nine yards. Possibly a little bit of forward planning in the way of ‘tonight is the night’. However, I’ve always loved your spontaneous streak and it’s a treasure when you finally let it out. I can’t say it wasn’t incredibly satisfying to be taken with you on that wave.” Brian raises his beverage to just below his lips, pressing into his chin. “I’m also sorry about the love bite on your neck.” Y/n slapped her husband’s chest as she saw his smirk barely hidden behind his cup. “You are not sorry. You loved doing that… However, I will admit I had purchased some lingerie I knew you’d love. When I got this robe actually. Reminded me of the old you bought me from Japan when we first dated. I loved how nice and fancy that felt on my skin. I wasn’t exactly very fancy when we met.” They both in unison allowed the silk seams to run through their fingertips. “So, your initial plan was to spend hours kissing my every inch and if that didn’t work lube and a vibrator?” “Not exactly…” Brian blushed. “I just wanted you to have a nice time and feel really good. I didn’t care how you got there, how involved I would be, so long as you wanted me close in those moments or just moving onto other activities.” He glanced down to y/n, with her pouting bottom lip at his thoughtfulness behind such a simple act. However, as soon as she saw that cheeky expression take over his face, she knew something more was coming. “There’s also an exquisite glass dildo in that draw that you missed. It’s meant to reflect rainbow prisms on your thighs when the light hits it just perfectly.” “Brian!” Y/n gasped, her cheeks instantly burning from the rising blush. “Honestly, the worlds opened up for me now you can get that variety of item delivered to the door.” “You’re so smug.” “I’m sorry but, are you complaining that I want to give you a thousand orgasms every which way I can?” With another roll of her eyes and hands gently cupping his cheek, she pressed their lips together in a lingering kiss. “Talk to me about the stars, horn dog.” “What do you want to know?” He replied and relaxed his neck onto the curve of the bench back and started to gently rock the swing with his leg. “What’s zodiacal dust? What star is the Big Dipper?” “Well it’s a constellation to start with…” Brian launched into his well-rehearsed speech about almost everything he knew about space dust, planets and the stars, pointing every so often to a particular cluster in the sky and naming whatever intricacies they held and only stopping to sip at his rapidly cooling beverage. She just loved to hear him talk about his passions even if she’d consider herself a rival in knowledge after all these years of hanging off his every word. Her painted nails would occasionally scratch his stubble or break his tempo with a stolen kiss. “Anything else you feel the pressing need to know?” Y/n giggled mischievously as a response jumped into her mind. “Ermmmm… have you ever had sex under the stars?” Brian’s lips fought the curl of a youthful smile as he gave a mocked ponderous sigh with the nape of his neck burning red under her gentle massage. “I believe you were present in that particular instance. God bless that hot summer.” He couldn’t help but bite into his lip as almost lost memories flooded his mind. “Apart from that, no, I have not partaken in such an activity.” Hazel eyes dared to meet his wife’s. “Have you?” “Once again, have never had the opportunity arise before to partake in such an activity. Nor anyone else I wanted to. I do remember it being very romantic though… Worshiped by your lover whist star gazing… If only I knew a sexy astronomer who could take me in his big and, incredibly private, garden which he loves because the lack of neighbours means lack of light so his views of the night sky are uninterrupted…Maybe one with a really, really big… knowledge of the universe.” Now it was Brian’s turn to roll his eyes. “You want to have sex in the garden?” He scoffed. “We’re meant to have grown up out of this behaviour.” “Well yeah, I didn’t bring two blankets out in hopes of one for me and one for you.” “I mean… why not?” Brian assumed this was just some silly game to tease him later. Either he’d agree and she’d mock him for entertaining such a ludicrous joke or call him a prude. “Take those bloody clogs off first though. Not a turn on, I’m afraid.” Dramatically, he flung the horrible, scuffed white footwear high into the air as they landed in two separate spots on the manicured lawn.   “Better?” Y/n pulled Brian into a kiss and almost instantly began to deepen it by sucking his lower lip and then softly biting with a moan when his fingers squeezed her flesh. Her fingers deftly working around the hem of his sweatshirt. “Were you not kidding about this?” She shook her head and began to work her lips over his jaw. “Oh…” Brian moaned as she nipped his pulse point with a large palm dancing up to cup her bum. It was messy and giggly as she pulled him to stand, their height difference amplified as Brian’s regal neck bent to chase her kisses when she moved to pull away. She walked backwards with a beckoning finger till she was further into their garden but nowhere near the thick coverage of trees. Y/n laid out the thickest blanket on the ground, it would keep the falling dew and creeping cold from her back at least. “Are you absolutely sure you want to do this? What if someone sees?” His wife gave no real or valid response instead dropping the silk robe down with a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders. It revealed the tops of her breasts, nipples slightly outlined from the evening chill and the neckline now sat halfway down her biceps. “Let them look?” She feigned pulling the robe apart.   “Okay your spontaneous streak is reverting back to about twenty-four.” Brian quickly wrapped his lover into an encompassing hug with a thinly veiled attempt to cover what should be for his eyes only. “Don’t remember you complaining last time or when we fucked across your studio desk.” She said teasingly. “Firstly, last time was one off. Secondly, that was indoors and a soundproofed room.” “It was three thirty in the afternoon and you recorded it.” Brian gave her his own proud but equally disgusted in himself smirk and flick of his eyebrows. “No one can see in. Come on… Make love to me.” Brian sighed, looking around nervously once more. He knew she was right; it had been his intention to make sure their home was fully private. Ensure it was somewhere they could be a normal family without press cameras pointing over hedges or people who wanted to peek over the fence expecting to be able to see some drug fuelled orgy. He lent down, kissing his wife with an elongated moan as large hands roamed the silk once. That was one of y/n favourite things about her husband; she loved his height and his big hands. Brian was quite soft and gentle in his speech and general demeanour, but he excluded a masculinity like no other man she met. One raise of his voice could shock her back down to earth and feeling the lithe muscles that held so much force and power ripple under her touch drove her wild. He’d protect her like no other, vicious in his attack. Yet, he was not one to hold his feelings or refuse admit his mistakes; it had saved his arse so many times, but it was his most endearing quality. “Oh!” Y/n gasped quickly as she brushed his shoulders before dipping her hand into the neck of his jumper. She left his lips and began to kiss along his neck as her other hand slipped under the hem of his sweatshirt. Brian’s adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he tried to hold in a moan when she nipped at the nape of his neck. Her hand was cold against the burning skin of his chest as she caused shivers to run down his spine. Brian cupped y/n’s face as he claimed her kisses once more, his body pressed harder to hers and took a dominant position with his feet either side of hers. “Brian…?” Y/n stepped slightly back from her husband as she broke their kisses. “Did you really think I’d fuck in the garden?” Y/n’s jaw dropped, and her eyes went playfully wide as she gave a hearty laugh. “You… I knew you were up to something! Right, that’s it!” Y/n knew what that meant and set off running along the damp grass with a jovial laugh following behind her. Brian too was chasing her but if he actually wanted to catch her it wouldn’t take much. She darted around, trying her best to elude him as fingertips would sometimes pass over his wife. “You’re such a cheeky little thing! You’re going to pay for this!” “No! I’m sorry! Truce!” She slipped on the damp grass, knees landing hard and with hands outstretched and a breathless laugh from the combination of spirting and laughing. “Truce! Please! Take mercy on your wife!” “Never!” His body crashed around hers somehow wrestling her squirming body onto his shoulder and back onto his feet. “Put me downnnnn!” y/n whined and banged her fists ever so softly against his lower back. The amount she’d missed even these physical moments was incredible. Had someone asked just twenty-four hours ago if they were a playful couple she would have answered with ‘only when we first got together. Admittedly children had slowed that down, but they’d always played around together. In the kitchen some lazy Sunday mornings whilst she was busy dancing to the radio and making pancakes, Brian would usually indulge himself by watching for a few minutes until she’d turn and bashfully pop one leg at the knee, hands locked together on her hip and grin. It would always end up with various sticky creams and jams over the surfaces, in their hair, and fingers covered from smearing across their lovers exposed skin. Brian’s wrists would soon be captured in her hands, the sweet tastes on each other’s lips as they’d whisper silly affectionate phrases. Brian sank to his knees on the blanket, throwing her carefully to her back, landing with splayed arms and a smirk on her lips. Y/n spread her legs around and across her husband’s thighs. “Truce?” She asked, holding out her hand for him to shake. “No.” A rapid shake of his head with a scrunch of his nose and even faster her fingers where digging tickles into his soft sides. Despite his body squirming from her sharp fingers, Brian managed to grab a hold of one of her wrists but her right repeatedly slipped through his hold, in part, due to the silky material. His thumb would surely leave a bruise on the captured wrist, but he’d gladly kiss it better and she could wear a small mark of normalcy; more than normalcy. A mark of happiness and hope. “I would like to accept your truce.” As the words left his mouth, Brian finally ceased her wrist and dragged the digits from his oblique muscle. “Ha-ha! Captured.” Brian’s weight shifted forward pushing her wrists to the ground. Biting into the side of his lower lip and shooting his eyebrows upwards a self-satisfied air fell around them. “So, quite the predicament you find yourself in, y/n…” Y/n shook her head at her husband, leaning up to kiss him but not quite reaching. He looks so perfect with his hair darkened in the night and aquiline features beautifully framed with the small pockets of light. “Not falling for your tricks again, Mrs.” “I mean it’s been a while. I had hope you’d want to kiss me just enough to get my own back.” Brian pushed his hips further onto y/n’s, essentially locking them to the ground as he adjusted each finger on her wrists and lent down to place the most chaste kiss on her lips he could. It was such a simple kiss, yet it left her breathless and chasing his mouth as soon as she felt the pressure float away. “Just kiss me again.” She whispered and wrapped her legs around his hips to hold him close with a gentle sway when they connected again. It just felt incredibly magical, like at any point a spell could lift. And yet here they were, making out like teenagers outdoors. Their kisses deepened but only with passionate and love. Brian released one of her wrists as his mind began to swim so cupped her cheek lovingly with a wanton moan. When he pulled away once more his eyes sparkling in adoration for his wife, perfectly mirroring the starlit sky above him. “I’m just so happy to be with you.” His smile was undeniably honest as he tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear. “I’ve missed you more than I care to admit.” y/n whispered back in turn. “Promise you won’t suddenly hate me when you wake up?” He joked with a hazy smile that spread mainly from his caramel eyes and the small lines appearing around them. “Only if dream you does something unforgivable…” Y/n words hung stagnant between them and Brian’s eyes changed to slightly pained or nervous. She’d known him long enough to know it wasn’t a good sign, he’d could quickly get stuck in his own head and the prolonged emotional absence could last for days. “… like watch a series finale without me or something truly heinous. Don’t do that and you should be okay.” Brian rolled his eyes, his wife bringing him towards her with an encouraging pull on his neck for a kiss. It was slow and languid, matching the sway of their hips. The robe had managed to stay tied but much of her left breast was exposed, her nipple just uncovered as the fabric caressed the curve already stiff from the cool breeze. Brian’s eyes trailed over his wife’s chest bashfully; hope of saying something quick witted or sweet evaporating away as his head dropped and slender nose pushed away the covering silk. Warm lips enclosed around her hardened nipple; his eyes closed as his tongue flicked expertly over her. Y/n kept her eyes firmly on her husband, her face turning from satisfied and relaxed to an unbridled whimper within a split second. “Brian!” She gasped his name so sweetly as he hummed and sucked the bud deeper into his hot mouth and his tongue somehow stimulated her to be even harder. Y/n bucked her hips unexpectedly into his, only making Brian lower more of his body against hers and rub the smooth silk covering her other breast. “We shouldn’t. What if someone- oh god!” Her words turned into a needy whine when teeth scraped along the sensitive flesh and made her head fall back into the blanket as one hand tangled into Brian’s damp curls. “Jesus, Bri, what if someone sees?” No answer came just a gentle hum as he sucked her nipple and raised his head until the flesh fell away from his lips. “They won’t.” His voice deep and gravelly in these moments, just loud enough for her to hear. Kisses were pressed to her exposed sternum until he met the deep V of the neckline, slowly, Brian’s hips slid off hers, but his torso remained covering her stomach. Large hands cupped her waist through the silk and his thighs pushed under hers with his knees bent and folded under him. “What are you doing?” Y/n gasped as Brian lightly pushed her upwards and moved her still wet bud between his lips. The long index finger of his left hand slowly hooking between the gown and the knot keeping it secure. “Worshipping you.” He said quietly between wet kisses to her sensitive breasts. “Under the stars.” “Baby… we can’t… not outside…” her eyes tightened as Brian’s nose ran along the fabric and nuzzled his way under the silk at her stomach. His tongue played around her hip bone as her grip tightened, keeping him in place and betraying the words she spoke. “We’ve already done it… you’ve already- oh- made me…” Brian kissed the small marks his hands had left earlier. “I just want you to relax and know how much you mean to me.” “I know what I mean to you, you’re being silly.” Y/n cupped Brian’s cheek as he continued to gently kiss her stomach. “Physically though. That you do something different too me. I’ve missed your body, your whimpers, the way you say my name… I missed it… I need it. I just want to make love to you. Revisit the past a little in the garden…” A confident smirk came across his mouth, winking to try and cover his bared emotions. Y/n sat up with a smile and a roll of her eyes hooking a hand around the back of his neck and pulling him for a kiss. Brian’s hand swept under her buttocks and encouraged her into his lap as he crossed his long legs. Brian’s bottom lip popped out, perfect hazel eyes glistening with puppy dog energy. It was irresistible. Fingertips played over his jaw as Brian dared to steal another kiss. It wasn’t old time, but the passion still burned for them both, reigniting within them time after time in the last few hours. - shiver ran down her spine as the heat of Brian’s chest only made her back feel colder. “Told you to wear clothes.” Brian reached out for the blanket that was abandoned nearby before draping it around her shoulders. “Where were we?” Y/n rolled her eyes once more with a shake of her head, arms stretching back around his shoulders enveloping them both in the soft fleece. Brian’s mind swirled as he snuck multiple kisses from his wife; he knew he was addicted to her lips, but he had idea how much he truly was. A deft finger hooked behind the loosened knot and tugged it apart. “I’m just keeping you warm.” Brian pursed his lips, but his eyes were sparkling pools of caramel. “Just innocently helping my wife.” “If it was innocent, you’d have your top off. That’s how you share body heat.” Two hands slipped into the collar of Brian’s sweatshirt in pure mischief. “Maybe the house would be warmer than.” “Maybe you should try harder.” Y/n challenged Brian with her fingers tickling his shoulders. ”I’m content to be a little chilly if you make some effort.” “I feel like this is you trying to trick me again… or just use me for my body.” “No, tricks. Just us.” Soft kisses pressed to each other’s mouth, nuzzling and holding each other as the air around them finally seemed to start warming up. His hands moved to from her hips to encircle her in a hug, pressing them together. “You still have that fancy lingerie to show me.” He smiled mischievously “So, Sir, you’d like me go inside and put on clothing so you can take it off.” Brian pursued his lips and drummed the fingers of his left hand against her skin. “No, I don’t think I do. Can I place it on a rain check though?” “Save that for another day? I’ve already got it planned in my mind. Getting an empty house, massage oil and candles and really treating you after a long day.” She giggled as her hands moved down Brian’s chest to the hem of his sweatshirt. “Come on. Get naked with me…” Brian sighed, relenting as he tugged off the jersey but was instantaneously rewarded with his wife’s arms holding the black cover around them both and giggling kisses nuzzled into his neck. Y/n pushed herself harder into his lap, moaning in just the way that always made him melt and do exactly what she wanted. Brian, however, knew her tricks and though eventually she’d get whatever she wanted, he could have some fun teasing aswell and began to softly thumb her nipples once more. “Oh fuck…” y/n biting into his neck unexpectedly. “Maybe we should go inside…?” Y/n didn’t wait for an answer as she stood up, extending a hand out for her husband and leaving everything but themselves and the blanket around her shoulders outdoors. She practically threw herself through the patio doors and into the living room, the dressing soon gone and her back into the cushions of their couch with the blanket under her. Brian clicking the door locked and kicking his reading light to the dullest setting. He simply couldn’t miss the chance to have his wife in sight again. Pausing with a gasp, admiring her body on full display for his eyes only. “You’re beautiful, Y/n.” Chilled skin soon landed on top of her own with Brian between her legs, kisses against her lips as they continued as if nothing had changed. His fingers slid between y/n’s legs causing her breath to catch at the cool feeling at her burning heat. “Oh…!” She pushed her wetness against him with nails scraping along his exposed shoulders. “Your hands are cold.” “They’ll warm up.” he whispered as he slipped his middle and index inside and began to motion back and forth against her front wall. Her body instantly reacted with a loud moan and her toes curling into the muscles of his covered calf. “Too much?” Brian whispered as his wife bit into her lip with a shake of her head. Her fingers pushing into the elasticated band of his pants. “I want you inside me again.” Y/n moaned with a voice dipped in tantalising desire. “Please, Bri?” It was too much to bear and physical actions took the place of any words. Kisses became passionate. Brian shifted himself with her hands delicately pushing his clothing down just enough to pull his erection free as he worked them down his legs. Y/n jerked his already hard member just a few times before beginning to moan into his mouth as she ran the warm tip though her wet folds. It was incredible to feel their bodies completely together. His hand gently supporting her head as they kissed and y/n’s fingertips digging into his cheek with an encouragement for his cock throbbing at her entrance. The soft palm around his shaft slipped over his hip as he pressed slowly inside. Every small amount of him that was taken inside felt white hot and almost as if they were made singularly for each other. Brian didn’t give her much time to accommodate; his thrusts long and languid as he made love with his wife. Y/n tilting her hips in rhythm to take as much as she could. “I love you…” She moaned hotly against his mouth. “I love you too, y/n.” His hips were snapping into hers more and more. Bodies bouncing as they collided together. She clawed at his back, leaving pink lines in his creamy skin as she felt the ever-tightening knot suddenly begging to form in her stomach. They rarely used this position but tonight it was perfect. His pubic bone pressing her clit with every thrust as Brian’s mouth moved to bury himself in her neck. “Oh god… just there… don’t stop… Please don’t-“ She was silenced by a crashing kiss. Brian keened against her lips, moving his weight to his hands at either side of her body. “I’m with you…” They both came undone within moments. Neither could tell if her muscles spasming around him or his cock deeply buried inside her with twitches rubbing her clitoris caused their respective orgasms, but it was utterly perfect. They gripped each other throughout, moaning and gasping only loud enough for their lovers’ ears. Brian’s wiry arm shook as he held himself with hooded eyes over her whilst the last ebbs of his orgasm ran down his legs and up his spine. Y/n recovering quietly panting as she sat up to fully press their bodies together with her legs tangling around his. “Thank you…” she whispered, kissing Brian’s cheek before encouraging his body to lay with hers under him and allowing his softening cock to slip from her with both groaning at the loss. “You feel so strong and big around me like this.” Their skin was tacky as they kept themselves as pressed together as possible. His forehead slowly fell to rest on hers, the tip of his nose nudging her cheek as he licked his lips; dry from the cold outdoor air and his panting and whimpering throughout. “I love you, darling. I love you so much.” She knew he was vulnerable, knew how much they’d both gone through in recent hours and even months. Softly she stroked the scratched areas of his back. “We should get cleaned up and really for bed. Our bed. You and I, I want to have your arms around me all night.” Y/n rolled her body from underneath his. Brian rolled onto his back, one hand covering his eyes as his chest heaved, still having trouble with catching his breath. Quietly, y/n cleaned up in the bathroom downstairs, rinsing her mouth with her cool mint wash in there and trying to somehow calm her ‘just fucked’ hair. She hadn’t heard Brian move and could see his mane of curls. “C’mon, big guy. Bedtime.” Y/n lent over the back of the couch and tickled his sensitive sides until Brian groaned. Their eyes met and both softened as he wordlessly began to pull himself from the couch as y/n pulled on the silk of her dressing gown once more. Ever dutiful, Brian trailed behind his wife, locking the door and checking the front, just once more. “What?” He puzzled with a smile as he saw y/n stood midway up the staircase just watching him. “It’s just nice to have my husband back…” she spoke with a small, happy smile. “Locking up the house? That’s what does it for you?” Brian pulled the handle again as the door banged lightly against the frame, his eyebrows playfully wiggling. “Do the washing and you’ll find yourself irresistible.” He jogged the few steps to his wife’s side, her arm around his waist and his across her shoulders. They settled under the sheets of their bed, still crinkled from their earlier exploits. It felt strange to have someone dozing next to her and poor Brian could barely keep his exhausted eyes open as y/n softly kissed his chest and moved her body around his bit his hand held her close along her back. “Goodnight, handsome.” “Goodnight beautiful.” Brian pipped the horn of his car as he drove along Roger’s ostentatiously long driveway. The sun was bright, a burningly hot day, usually would mean the kids would all be lazing around outside as Roger and his wife would sip their coffee in the sun. Tucked in the boot of the car, y/n had already gotten Brian to buy the largest pop up pool the shop had in store for their boys’ summer parties after hearing all about the Taylor’s having their own pool. It wouldn’t be quite as good, but it would do, and they already had arranged for a hot tub to be installed next week. A treat to themselves but mainly Brian just wanting to give his wife the world. “I’ll go around the back. Are you staying?” Brian asked calmly. “Christ, no. Far too hot without the air con.” They let the dog free, the wild thing obviously already sensing the way to her favourite family members as a screech and a blasting splash came into ear. “I knew you were here. That bloody wild dog of yours. You know you shouldn’t adopt the ones they tell you can’t find a home.” Roger joked as he rounded the corner of the house but softened as he saw Brian’s arm draped around his wife for the first time in months. It wasn’t forced. They looked just like themselves, but he could see the happiness literally radiating from both of them. “I know but that’s the pity streak that kept you in the band of all those years.” Brian mocked back before hugging his best friends’ wife and thanking her quietly for sending him home last night.  “We owe you one.” Roger winked to y/n with a discreet nod. “You know it was the name that got me. Maggie May. It made sense at the time.” “Do you want to stay for lunch?” R/w/n asked. “No, Brian’s got a pool to assemble. Thank you though.” He rolled his eyes as Roger let out a chuckle. “How in the world did you get him to agree to that? He’s spent the last twenty years worrying about his bloody grass.” “Ha ha. Very funny.” He rolled his eyes, watching his teenage boys dragging their feet up the stone steps with Rogers own children following behind. “How was the concert?” He got no response but a series of mumbled grunts as they trailed wet bodies inside. Brian wouldn’t change it for the world. “That told me then.” “They do my bloody head in dripping on the floor. It’s fine but I’ve gone flying across the hallway more than once this week already. I don’t understand why they can’t just use towels!” “Mrs Taylor, you are getting grumpy in your old age.” Rogers voice gave a raspy chuckle as the still damp kids appeared with their backpacks and dry clothes. “See you again, micro Brian’s.” “Thanks for last night uncle Rog.” Freddie said, as he hugged his aunt. “Thanks for the chat.” “Go on bugger off, messing up the place with your long legs. Get outta here.” Roger kicking at Harry’s thigh to shove him into walking. The boys had a mini breakdown in the middle of the night when something had come on the radio about their parents, the whole Taylor family had instantly closed around them and comforted the twins as best they could. Harry and Freddie both admitting to each other how much they missed their parents. “Take your bloody wet dog with you! I’ll have to clean that pool now!” “So,” y/n turned in her front seat as the boys got in, damp dog on her cover between them. She started to speak as Brian threw the backpacks in the boot, keeping the pool and the various floats a surprise just for a few more minutes. “Me and daddy were thinking we should all head out to lunch. We’ve got a table outside so Maggie can come.” “Were not little kids. Can’t you just tell us at home if you’re getting a divorce.” Harry had unexpectedly exploded. Brian’s hazel pools flicking to meet his dumbstruck wife’s. “What’s brought this on…” Y/n just about managed to muster. “That’s what the radio said last night. You’d announced and Dad was moving out that night.” Freddie muttered. “That is categorically not true.” Brian spoke up when words had failed y/n. “We respect you far more than to pull a stunt like that.” “Baby boys. We’d never do that to you. Last night, we had a really good chat actually and worked out a lot of things. We wanted to treat you both today because you deserve it.” Harry looked for support from his twin, but Freddie’s own hazel eyes were locked on his clasped hands in his lap. “The corners turned. We’re getting back to normal. I love you both.” Brian hopped in his driver’s seat but turned on his knees to grip one of each of their shoulders. “I love her. We’re a family unit, seven, when you count the big ones.” “Eight.” Harry said just loud enough for everyone to hear. He was fed up of serious conversation after serious conversation. “Can’t leave out Maggie.” “Yeah, dad, why so cruel to Maggie.” “You’re impossible.” Brian gave a laugh, mock choking each of them in turn before driving away, his hand on his wife's knee absentmindedly before her own covered it, as the two boys looked between themselves. “Lunch or no? Your shout?” “Can we visit the music store? I need new strings.” “You’re trying to tell me in our entire house, Harry May, you cannot find one set of guitar strings.” Brian heard his wife chuckle as she rolled her eyes. “Go on then. What about you, Freddie? What’s your plan to milk me of?” “I was thinking about some trainers… I’ve seen these rainbow ones…” he gave a shaking sigh. “I’d like to wear them to pride.” “Can I get a matching pair?” Brian laughed, not quite registering that something more was happening, but the atmosphere thickened again. “I’m gay.” He stated but the words rushed from his mouth as Harry held his breath looking ahead to see their parents’ reactions. “Okay… That doesn’t answer if I can get matching trainers though.” Two sets of caramel eyes meeting in the rear-view mirror. “You don’t care?” Freddie wiped a tear of relief as he felt his mums’ hand over his cheek, fully turned in her seat. “No baby… We love you for you.” “I’ll go to pride with you…” Harry offered his support, working out his brother was gay had taken place months ago but neither had the guts to flat out tell the other. “Me too, if your old mum isn’t too uncool. What do you say? Can we have matching rainbow family trainers.” “I guess so…” Freddie smiled, overjoyed but rolling his eyes at the ludicrous nature of this all.

”I did say this would happen… We did name him Freddie.” Brian smiled with a wink to his family. Brian May looked happy yesterday as he and his wife, Y/n May, took a spot of retail therapy with their twin sons and rescue dog. The family are pictured with a guitar case and multiple bags from a trendy clothing store. Brian kept his wife close as the pair have seemingly put the past behind them as they were pictured together for the first time in months. Our sources said they looked comfortable and content as they shopped around and took in lunch. The rocker happily signed a couple of autographs for staff before they left.

[cafeshiawase]

Wallace Cup 2k19 Interview

“Before we start, I want to make one thing clear: I’m not here for rumor mills or sensationalism. I want my article to be a proper reflection of what’s going on. So please don’t try to feed me rumors as truth, alright?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll only be telling the truth. As an idol, I know how much damage the rumour mill can do.”

“Tell me a bit about yourself, mon ami(e). Is this your first competition, or if it’s not, how long have you been participating? Have you participated, specifically, in a Contest Spectacular before?”

“Hmmm...now that I think about it, I haven’t participated in anything like this before. It’s an entirely new experience for me, so I’m really looking forward to it!”

“What sort of background do you come from-are you a trainer, a breeder, a coordinator, or perhaps something else? Do you see this giving you any advantage in the competition/as a judge/ect.?”

“Well, I’m an idol! I perform alongside my friends—that is, my fellow idols and my Pokémon—with the goal of making people smile. And I guess in that respect I do have a bit of an advantage, my Pokémon and I know what works to impress the crowd, but...our lives are nothing like contests. There’s going to be a lot to learn!”

“What are your thoughts on the competition here today? It looks like we have quite a diverse cast of Pokémon fans present. Anyone you know? Rivals, perhaps?”

“Actually, I don’t think I recognise anyone which is a shame. But an opportunity to meet new people is never a bad thing; I can’t wait to get to know everyone.”

“How are you feeling about this event in general? Are you nervous at all?”

“Big events are always nerve-wracking, and especially so when it’s something new like this. But...I have my Pokémon here to support me, and I have Café Parade and my fans cheering me on as well, so I’ll do my best to make all of them proud!”

* “Wallace seems to have devised quite an interesting challenge, what with the tag team appeal. What are your thoughts on this curve ball? Any plans you can share with us?”

“Indeed. I must admit stepping into something brand new like this and then having a curveball like this thrown into the mix has me even more nervous than I already was. I enjoy working in a team with other people, though, so perhaps this will give me the upper hand!”

* “Have you already selected a partner? If not, what are some things you’re prioritizing both in a partner and for your appeal in general?”

“Ehehe, not quite yet. What do I want in a partner...just someone I can easily get along with and someone my Pokémon like? I’m not a picky person.”

* “What about the second round? It sounds like you won’t have much time to prepare, so are you working out your ideas now? Is there are certain aspect of your personality you want to highlight in your performance?”

“I do have a few little ideas, I guess, but I don’t think I should give away all my secrets so early! I just want to put on a show that makes the whole world smile. So many people will be watching it, after all! It’s a great opportunity to spread happiness!”

“Which round do you feel more confident about and why?”

“Maybe the first one, since I get to work with another person? You can pull off more the more people and Pokémon are involved, I think.”

“Can you give us any hints about either of your performances? Without spoiling it, what do you think will make your entries stand out?”

“Hints...hmmm...well, I think people will really like what Togetic and I have to offer up. That’s not too much of a giveaway, is it?”

* “So I hear the first round preparations will broadcasted this year. What do you think of that? Are you the type of person that enjoys being in front of a camera, or do you think it might to too distracting and troublesome?“

“I’m used to that sort of thing thanks to being an idol. It doesn’t bother me too much, but I guess having your blunders put on display is a little embarrassing...”

“How did you chose the Pokémon partners you’ll be using in this competition? Are you trying to stick to a theme, or going with Pokémon that have experience competing?”

“I don’t think I have a particular theme or anything, I just brought out those that enjoy performances the most. For example, Eevee is quite a little show off—I mean that in the nicest possible way!—so I couldn’t in good conscious leave it behind!”

* What are your opinions on Wallace as a judge? I don’t mean to compare anyone, of course, but just out of curiosity.

“I-I must admit, I don’t really keep up with contests and such myself, but...well, everyone knows Wallace is an incredibly talented man. I think it’s an honour to be present at an event hosted by him.”

“Is there anything else you’d like to say about this competition? I’m admittedly going to leave soon to get this article going, but I hope everything goes smoothly for you!”

“I don’t think so! I just hope to have fun and make a lot of new friends and, of course, make everyone watching smile! Thank you very much—we’ll all do our best!”

(Off the record) “Do you have any other thoughts about this event, or any suspicions? I’m not going to publish them since, like I said, I’m not one for rumors. But I personally want to know what I might want to be keeping an eye on in case things do happen. Have you seen or heard anything suspicious?”

“Ehh? Suspicions? I haven’t seen anything I’d call suspicious...hmm, I hope nothing bad happens. I want this to be a fun and stress-free event for everyone...”

[redvsvblue]

Your writing is awesome. Any fun shipping involving Michael and Ryan in an Airport related AU? (Based off that list you reblogged)

Hey, anon, anon, you’re awesome. :-P. That being said, uh, this…became less of a prompt and more of an entire fic. I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted! (I chose ‘we have the same luggage and didn’t check the tags before we left so i’m calling you to exchange suitcases (and you also had some interesting things in your bag so i’m excited to meet you) au’ from the list!) 

Thank you for prompting, though! I do hope you like it! 

The phone rings awayand Michael holds it between ear and shoulder as he scratches hischin with a yawn. Late morning sunlight splashes over his livingroom, over the plush rug and the stale sofas he hasn’t sat on in aweek.

Michael lowers hisbowl of cereal to the table to flip over the rubbery luggage tagagain, rubbing his thumb over the brand name and drifting over thename messily scrawled in under the plastic covering.

The phone connectsand Michael snaps to attention, listening carefully to the silence onthe other end.

“Hello?”

“…Yeah?” Ascratchy voice replies, thick with sleep. And probably jetlag,whoops.

“Ryan?”

“…Is this Jack?”

“Uh, no, this is –I’m Michael. We, uh, we seem to have the wrong luggage.”

“Yeah, I figuredthat out when I saw the Amiibos. Give me a second.”

– 

“So, you livein Austin too. Thank god you weren’t connecting.”

“Yeah,thankfully.”  

“…I gottaask, what’s with the knives?”

“They’re –for a friend.”

“A friend?”

“Shut up.”

“And what’swith the makeup?”

“Okay, that’sdefinitely for afriend.”

Michael waitspatiently in the window seat at Starbucks, scrolling idly through hisphone as he waits for this Ryanto show up with his luggage.

“GavinDipshit Free?” Someone asks, tearing Michael from his screen as helooks up to see – well, who must presumably be Ryan,a charming smile and a polite hand extended and Michael’s suitcaseby his legs.

“It’sfor his birthday,” Michael says, grinning back as he shakes Ryan’shand and gestures for him to sit across. Ryanlaughs lightly and rolls his suitcase over under the table –Michael pushes Ryan’s over, and with their own luggage safelytucked next to their legs, they start up a mild conversation. Afterall, Michael does have somequestions.

“Thepotpourri was a nice touch,” Ryan says.

“Yeah,well, I’m not gonna let my dirty socks stink it up, that’s justgross.”

“Iappreciated it. Sorry I couldn’t return the favour.”

“Nah,you were fine. The body glitter is a little questionable, though, Imean, what are you, a stripper? Entertainer?”

Michaelshoots him a teasing little smile and Ryan laughs, shaking his head.

“No,uh, I was at a – convention. With a friend.” Ryan’s eyes driftover to Michael’s forearm and seem to light up a touch, his smilegrowing wider when he speaks. “The one over in Vegas? Theypremiered Far - “

“FarCry, yeah!” Michael says at the same time. “So, cosplayer?”

Ryanlifts one shoulder in a lazy shrug.

“Myfriend’s more into it than me,” he says. “At least, she putsway more effort in. The glitter was for her Overwatch day.”

“Whatwas yours?”

“Booker.From – Bioshock - “ Ryan grins when Michael starts eagerlynodding along, leaning forward on his elbows.

“Well,you gotta show me pictures now,” he says.

“I– eh, they’re not great,”Ryan says, pulling out his phone nonetheless. “Although Meg did doa pretty great Elizabeth.” He leans in a little to whisperdramatically as he opens his phone. “The photographer, however, alittle overpriced,I think.”

“Aw,dude, I know photography people!” Michael exclaims, hunching overRyan’s phone when he brings up the photos to show him. “Oh, thoseare good, yeah, shereally is a great Elizabeth.” He glances up at Ryan a little slyly.“And you’re a great Booker.”

Ryanclears his throat and flushes the faintest pink, murmuring his thanksas Michael zooms in on details.

“Didyou make the costumes?” He asks.

“Ah,no, that’s more Meg’s deal.”

“Dude,listen, next time you need a photographer, hit me up, I know a fewpeople,” Michael says, turning the phone back around. “I mean,Gavin’s all over that shit.”

“GavinDipshit Free?”

“Theone and only.”

Michaelbreaks into friendly laughter and Ryan shares it, pocketing his phoneand shifting a little in his seat.

“Hey,uh, listen, let me get you coffee and you can tell me more about yourcrushed snowglobes?” Ryan asks, something hesitant in his tone.

“Yeah,yeah, that’d be – great,” Michael says, and Ryan’s pleasedlittle smile is incrediblyendearing. God, it’s only been half an hour and Michael’s alreadythoroughly impressed with the man.

“Hey,wait,” Michael says, catching Ryan’s arm before he walks past. “Idon’t know your last name.”

“Haywood,”Ryan says, turning to shake Michael’s hand again. “Ryan Haywood.”

“Jones.Michael Jones,” Michaelreplies, clasping his hand to Ryan’s and grinning at the littlefirm shake Ryan gives.

– 

“Ithought you weren’t supposed to be back until tomorrow,” Ryansays as he pulls his bag off the carousel – checks the tag andshows Michael to prove it.

“Eh,there was a snowstorm comin’,” Michael says, shoving his hands inhis pockets and shivering a little in the chill of the airport.“Bumped all our flights either earlier or later. Figured I’drather lose a day on hotel fees than getting stuck in Jersey foranother week.”

Ryanhums in agreement and pushes his beanie up out of his eyes, pullingup the handleon his suitcase to lean against it as he waits with Michael.

“Convention?”Michael asks. Ryan nods.

“Meetanyone interesting?” Michael teases, has done ever since he foundout Ryan has a penchant – ormore of a habit - ofaccidentally flirtingwith people.

“…notthere,” Ryan says, giving him a strange glance. Michaelignores the little skip in his heartbeat and nods, carefully watchingthe conveyor belt for his bag.

Itrattles up to them and Michael lunges for it, wrestling it off thebelt with exaggerated grunts as Ryan laughs behind him, steadying himwith a hand on his shoulder asMichael yanks the handleup.

They’reonly barely out of customs when something jumps Michael from behind,sending him stumbling forward a few steps and shouting an irritated“Gavin!” when he identifies who exactly is squeaking in his ear.

“Gavin,you fuck, I just got off a plane!” Michael yells, laughing anywaywhen Gavin slides off his back to come around his front, practicallybouncing on his feet in excitement.

“Michaelboi!” He exclaims, fiddling with a slim, wrapped gift in his handsand ecstatically presenting it to Michael. “Happy birthday!”

“It’syour birthday?” Ryan asks as Michael accepts the gift.

“Isthis Ryan? LovelyRyan?” Gavin asks cheekily – Michael hisses out a noand Gavin only grins wider, giving Ryan a quick once-over and holdinghis hand out to shake.

“I’veheard a lot about you,” Gavin says calmly. Michael glares at him.

Heknows too much. Michael’s going to have to snap his neck.

“Anyway,boi, didn’t want you to miss out on your birthday!” Gavin says.Michael smiles and tears openthe paper – and his jaw drops open, much to Gavin’s cleardelight.

“Holyshit, Gav!” Hebreathes, ripping the rest of the paper away and stuffing itcarelessly into his pocket as he flips over the copy of Far Cry, thenew one that came out only a month ago, just before he met Ryan. “Ican’t believe you got this for me!”

“Yeah,well, Jeremy can’t, either,” Gavin replies, tapping the cover.“It’s from him as well, but only if you let him play with you.”

“JesusChrist, thanks, Gavin,” Michael says, staring at the cover indisbelief. “…feel kinda bad for ruining your snowglobes now.”

“Nah,it’s fine! They were top! Worked great in the hammer smashin’video.”

“The– hammer…smashing?” Ryan asks, and Gavin turns to tell him allabout his slo-mo channel andMichael drools over the game.

Ryanends up sharing their taxi home, deep in a playful argument withGavin that only gets more ridiculous the longer the night goes on.

– 

“’ello?”

“Ryan?”

“Michael,”Ryan says cheerfully, something rustling in his background. “What’sup?”

“I– think I have something of yours,” Michael says, slowly turningthe envelope over in his hand. “It’sa – con ticket?”

“Nope,that’s yours,” Ryan says. He briefly pulls the phone away tocroon something to his dog.

“Mine?”

“Meghad an extra,” Ryan says lightly. “Said I could give it towhoever I wanted.”

“Areyou – serious?” Michael asks. Ryan goes silent for a moment.

“Thoughtit would be a good first date,” Ryan says. “If you – wanted itto be that. We can just go as friends, it’s okay - “

“Thecoffee wasn’t our first?” Michael jokes, his heart squeezing upin his chest and Ryan’s bright, happy laugh doesn’t help.

“Seconddate, then,” Ryan concedes. “Youin?”

“I– yeah, yeah, I’m in.”

– 

Michaelcurses loudly when he reads the tag on the bag he picked up andglances sadly back at the customs gate, at the strict security guardskeeping a rigid eye on the people. Ryan’sstill in the air right now, a fuck-up with the seating chart andoverbooking meaning he got the next flight but his luggage got thisone – and Michael’s a tired, travel-weary idiot who forgot tocheck the tag.

Atleast this time it’s not as bad – Ryan should be over in a fewhours, but until then Michael’s stuck with his stuff inan unfamiliar hotel in an unfamiliar city with no more clothes thanthe ones on his back.

Michael’sphone rings hours later, while he’s flipping carelessly through TVchannels and seriouslyconsidering raiding the con snacks he knows Ryan has in his bag.

“Hey,”he says, putting it on speakerphone and muting the TV.

“Propertyof Michael Jones,” Ryan reads out. “Austin, Texas.”

“Yeah,shut up, okay, so I got the wrong bag,” Michael grumbles. Ryanlaughs and car horns honk behind him.

“Youshould really be more careful about this,” Ryan teases. “Or get adifferent bag.”

“Youget a different bag!”

– 

Michael’scostume is only loosely a cosplay, some scraps he put together tomake a semi-decent modern Link sort of thing – Ryan assures himit’s plenty fine, but when Michael sees Meg’s Zelda heimmediately realises he’s way out of his depth.

Still,he walks into that damn convention centre with a BJ Blazkowicz Ryanon his right and an Ocarina Zelda on his left, and determinednot to fuck up their costumes somehow.

It’samazing. It’s goddamn amazing and Ryan and Meg hit up all the gamebooths with him and the overpriced stalls – they split up for a fewpanels, Meg finds her other friends and splits for lunch while Ryanleads Michael outside to get some air and refuel, pulling snacks outof his hefty jacket with a grin and setting his guns aside to pullout some bottles of water.

“Ohgod thank you,”Michael gasps, cracking one open and downing half of it in one go asRyan chuckles beside him, tearing open the fruit snacks and tippingthem into his mouth without touching his grimed-up gloves.

Theyconverse quietly against the warm railing, basking in the sun andsharing snacks as they laugh and talk – at one point Michael inchescloser and Ryan twists a little to face him better and Michael’sheart does backflipswhen Ryan smiles at him.

“What’veyou got planned next, big guy?” Michael asks, a bottle danglingfrom his fingers as Ryan shrugs and looks him over.

“Inthe next hour or in the next minute?” He asks.

“Youplan to the minute?”

“Somethings.” Ryan’s eyes drop to Michael’s lips and – oh– oh, that’s whathe means. Michael nervously licks his lips and Ryan’s cheeks flushthat familiar faint pink again when Michael steps even closer, barelyany space between them.

“Sowhat is your plan for the next minute?” Michael asks, tilting hishead.

Inresponse, Ryan simply cups his jaw and leans in for a gentle kiss,softly pressing their lips together and then a little harder whenMichael sighs against him, butterflies dancing in his chest at thesimple, electric touchof Ryan’s mouth.

Ryanhums contentedly and Michael places a hand on his neck to encouragehim closer, captivated by theslow way Ryan sinks into him, the easy way his lips move andMichael’s just aboutto open his mouth -

Acamera shutter goes off and startles them into each other, Ryan’sforehead bashing against Michael’s and Michael’s nose rubbed inthe makeupped grime on Ryan’s cheek.

Michaelsprings apart to snap at the assholephotographer and finds it none other than hisasshole photographer, with that stupid happy grin and that stupidexpensive camera and –

“Gavinwhat the fuck are you doing here?!”

“Meginvited me,” he says simply, tongue poking out between his lips.

“Didyou know about this?” Michael asks, whirling on an awfullysheepish Ryan.

“Maybe,”he allows. “He was –going to take pictures later, for us.”

Michaelsquints at him.

“Ididn’t know he’d do this!”Ryan protests, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“It’sa good photo, though,” Gavin adds, stepping forward to showMichael. “’S sweet.”

“Youasshole,” Michaelmutters, grabbing the camera to turn the screen towards him. Fuck,it is a good photo.Fuck Gavin and his fuckingamazing photography skills.

“Asshole,”Michael murmurs again, more reluctantly, and Ryan peers over hisshoulder to study the picture.

“It’sgood,” Ryan says, glancing up at Gavin. “Great shot.”

“Thanks,Ryan,” Gavin chirps, grinningsmugly at Michael. “See? He’snice.”

“HeyRyan, stop encouraging dipshit.”

“Oi!”

– 

“Hey.”

“Hey,what’s up?”

“Eh,nothing much, just callin’. How’reyou?”

“Yeah,yeah, I’m okay. Thanks for Friday, by the way, it was really fun.”

“Yeah,it was for – me, too. Thanks for letting me stay over.”

“I,uh – of course. Yeah.”

“SorryI stole your shirt.”

“Bringit back next time and we’re even.”

“…justbring it back?”

“Wearit.”

“Thatsounds like the Ryan I know.” A pause. “Oh, yeah, actually, I didcall to say something.”

“Hm?”

“Igot a new bag.”

“I– really?”

“Yeah,it’s bright fuckin’ red, can’t be missed.”

“I,uh, I got a new one, too.”

“Ohyeah? What colour?”

“…red.”

“Ryan.”

“No,wait, wait – what brand is yours?”

“It’sAL, it’s the, uh, the AL All-day large - “

“ -large compartment storage case?”

“Michael?”

“…”

“Michael?”

“Areyou telling me we got the same fucking bag,Ryan goddamn Haywood?!”

“Greatminds think alike?”

“Thesame fucking bag?!”

[wannawrite]

Are You Jealous?

Wanna One’s Lai Guanlin X Reader

Fluff, angst 

TW: use of explicit language 

Word count: 3062

• you’re jealous

• boyfriend! Guanlin 

• ft. created solo idol, Hung Aeri  

• ft. mY CUBE CHICKS DEBUTING TOGETER 

hEeyy tiME TO TAKE ON MY BIAS AGAIN i love soft guanlin, thERE’S A LACK OF GUANLIN IN MY LIFE Fun fact: Guanlin has wrecked Sanggyun and Justin for the place of bias when it was still broduce 101 days….actually I was inCreDIBLY JUSTIN AND YUEHUA OBSESSED IN GENERAL pls stan them and go support my TOPPDOGG sons ;) 

__________ 

Hung Aeri. 

You’ve known her for majority of your life, being classmates in high school and even sharing the same lunch table. It didn’t come as a shock when you found out she had debuted under Cube Entertainment as a solo idol, the whole school knew just how talented she was. She could sing and dance well and her bubbly and kind personality was incredibly attractive, it was the icing on the cake. 

Aeri never forgot her friends even though she had the busiest schedule, the two of you had gone out to try a new waffle bar recently. She even invited you over to her house, just for old times’ sake. You often found yourself waiting outside Cube’s studio in the evening for her and you would go out for dinner together. On occasion, Aeri would invite other trainees or artists. 

She practically introduced you to your current boyfriend, Lai Guanlin. He was a tad bit shy and awkward at your first dinner out as friends, Aeri only made the situation worse as she kept winking and sending sending suggestive looks but he warmed up to you and grew to love you. You owed Aeri so much, she pretty much got your life plan on track. 

So why were you feeling so bitter when Guanlin told you he would be working on a track with her? 

 It hurt, deep down inside. 

As much as you wanted to be happy and as excited as they were, you couldn’t bring yourself to, yet you still faked a smile and congratulated your friends. Guanlin was anticipating the song so much, his debut with Seonho would be happening soon and this would definitely give them a boost as Aeri was a well known singer already. 

“Jagi, why the sad face?” Guanlin poked the sides of your face, grinning. You were curled up on his couch in his living room…in his huge castle-like house. He had invited you over to hangout, nothing much. 

Your mind drifted to how many times he had brought Aeri over. 

Snap out of it Y/N, you scolded yourself. Let’s not think about that. 

You smiled back at Guanlin and reached for his hand. “Nothing, just a bit busy with school, that’s all. Final years are tougher than they look.” Your eyes caught a peep of something that was well hidden by his sweater sleeve, it seemed like ink. Tentatively, you pushed the material back to reveal a realistic looking tattoo. You gasped, glaring at Guanlin. He only chuckled, “Y/N, calm down. It’s only a temporary one. Aeri noona and I got bored and stuck on one part of the song so we looked temporary tattoos up and ordered some ink. Do you like it? Aeri noona did this one for me!” His smile only seemed to widen the more he talked about Aeri. 

Ahhh, the multi talented Hung Aeri. You remembered the times when the teacher caught her doodling in her sketchpad during classes and since you sat next to her, your hand often became a drawing block. She was very quick with small scribbles but the one she did on Guanlin’s arm was intricate and clearly took quite some time. 

The jealously monster in you was being fed very well today. “Ahh, Aeri unnie is good at these kind of things. Yes, it’s very pretty,” you praised, and it was the first truth in awhile. 

Guanlin tucked a stray lock of hair behind your ear. “Never as gorgeous as you,” he declared. “Nothing will ever compare.“ 

You blushed at his cheesy words but that didn’t help the guilt and envy bubbling inside of you.

… 

"Hi! I’m a friend of Hung Aeri and Lai Guanlin. I brought them some cupcakes, could you pass them-”

“Just go in. They’re in studio four.” The annoyed staff who sat behind the counter typing absolutely nothing on her laptop said, dismissing you without a reply.

You rolled your eyes once you were pass the counter, what great security they have here. Or…it could be that you’ve visited too many times everyone here knows you by name. Still, shouldn’t they at least check my ID or get me to sign in? Nevermind. 

“Huh? Y/N!" 

You nearly jumped at the loud exclamation that was made, then realised who it was. 

It was your other good friend, Yoo Seonho. 

"Hello Y/N! You look very pretty today,” Seonho complimented, nearly knocking you over with his famous bear hugs. 

“Aye, you’re only complimenting me because I have cupcakes with me but thank you,” you replied, but softly because Seonho was squeezing the life out of you.

“I missed you Y/N! I’ve been working hard on our debut song! Do you want to hear it?” Seonho offered, taking your arm and strolling to his workroom anyway. 

You laughed and agreed to listen to the song. Knowing how much effort the boys put into it, it was bound to be worth it. Just as you predicted, the music was melodious, it was perfect. “It’s amazing! You will do so well! I’m so proud of you, Seonho,” you praised. “I’ll buy you another box of cupcakes!" 

Seonho perked up at this. "Really? You will?" 

You nodded your head with vigour. "Let’s go right now!”

… 

You felt a sharp nudge in the ribs as you were paying for the cupcakes, you opened your mouth to reprimand Seonho but he put a finger over his lips and bobbed his head to the left. You took a glance at whatever he was looking at.

Aeri. 

Guanlin. 

The two walked close together, giggling and whispering to each other with coffees in hand and her bag in Guanlin’s. They walked pass the cupcake shop Seonho and you were in but barely looked away from each other to take note of their surroundings. 

Your eyes nearly turned green with envy, it took a lot of effort to play it cool.

They’re just friends, Y/N. you reminded yourself. It’s nothing you should be worried about. 

You took Seonho’s arm and walked out of the shop. Guanlin and Aeri had disappeared long ago and you guessed it was back to Cube. 

Whatever. 

“Y/N…” Seonho began in a small voice. When he had caught your attention, he continued. “Are-are you jealous of Aeri noona?" 

The response was immediate, you shot him an ‘oh, c'mon’ look. "What? No way. They’re friends too and I’m super excited for their track! My best friends are working on it together! It really couldn’t be any better. I’m not.” You said it loudly in an attempted to convince yourself too. 

Seonho eyed you, slightly alarmed by your outburst but he shook it off. 

It was a silent journey back to the Cube building - minus Seonho already ripping open his box of cupcakes and devouring them. 

You were refreshing your message inbox, hoping for a message from Guanlin but of course, there was none. 

“You shouldn’t lie to yourself Y/N. I know you are not okay with it.” Seonho’s words cut through the quietness like a knife. 

The both of you reached Cube’s front door, Seonho pushed it open. 

Your jaw dropped. Was I that transparent? But I’m really okay with it. You twiddled your thumbs together. 

“Y/N….you can never lie to me,” Seonho said. 

“Am I that bad?” You asked, ashamed. 

Seonho shook his head and smiled. “No, I’m just one very observant friend. Have you gotten past Guanlin hyung or Aeri noona with your lies?" 

You had to think hard about that one. 

"I think they knew but let it drop. This isn’t something you can let go easily. It’s hard but trust me, Guanlin wouldn’t cheat on you. Believe that." 

Then Seonho spun away and vanished into his workroom with his box of cupcakes like he was never standing in front of you. 

Your mind wandered to what your good friend had said. 

Am I jealous? 

… 

The answer to your question came on Thursday night when Guanlin called you just before you fell asleep. 

You had answered in delight, wanting to talk to him too and it was a rare moment for his busy schedule kept him occupied every minute. You didn’t understand how he could balance so well, it was a blessing. 

However, your happiness was short lived and so was the call. 

Your boyfriend had only called to tell you that he wouldn’t be able to make it for Friday’s date night. He sounded regretful, apologetic and exhuasted so you let it go and told him to rest. Guanlin told you he was still in the studio, still working on the track. You asked about Aeri as you hadn’t talked to her in a long time too. Guanlin replied with a simple ‘she’s tired too but we’re happy to be working together. We’re more than just colleagues now. She misses you as well,”. 

He ended the call and you couldn’t help but have a restless night, knowing that both your friends were beyond bone-tired but still worked so hard. Unable to sleep, you checked Guanlin’s Snapchat story at 1.43 am and found that they were recording, it made you smile. But you couldn’t help but feel you were left out, Aeri had brought along tons of fantastic snacks that seemed to vanish quickly. 

You aren’t an artist Y/N, you’re just a college student. Sigh, look at Aeri unnie, so perfect, so slim and pretty. She can sing and dance well too, what are you? Guanlin probably deserves someone better… someone like Aeri. He’s probably happier with her. 

Aeri’s story was updated at 3.27 am with a picture that made your stomach churn and heart crack. 

It appeared they were spending the night at the studio, she and Guanlin had built a pillow fort and were cuddling inside of it. 

You had never done that with Guanlin. 

There was a video uploaded fifteen minutes later. You tapped on it. 

“Sigh, Guanlin offered to crash at his house since my apartment would be locked by now but I can’t do that to him,” she said and you couldn’t help but notice the terrible eye bags under her eyes and the close proximity between them. She zoomed in on Guanlin’s face, he held up a peace sign. “Goodnight Snapchat." 

It wasn’t a good night for you. You could feel the bitterness bubbling and threatening to spill.

…

Guanlin’s parents ushered you into the house, they were apologetic that they had to leave for a wedding dinner soon but promised to talk another time. 

You loved his parents. 

And so did they. 

You waited for Guanlin to come home, he had left for the studio again in the morning but today was one of the last days so he would be returning early. You texted him to say that you were in his room. 

Saturdays passed by lazily, all you wanted to do was cuddle with Guanlin so he would get some sleep. 

He probably has Aeri for that. 

No, stop it Y/N.

It was around 6 pm when he arrived home, you heard the opening and closing sound of the gate and doors. 

Something puzzled you, Guanlin seemed to be talking to someone. He pushed open the door and spotted you sitting at his desk, his eyes widened in surprise. "Y/N?" 

"Hey, how have you been?” You approached him for a hug which he gave half heartedly. 

“Uh, good. Why are you here? When did you get here?” He looked just as confused as you were. 

“I sent you a text? Did you not get it?” Guanlin scrolled through his phone and nodded. “No, sorry. I did. Aeri noona was playing with my phone just now. I’m sorry Y/N." 

You dismissed it with a wave of your hand and wished all that pent up jealously and guilt would too. "Is she downstairs?” You asked. 

Guanlin nodded, “But not for long. She just wanted to drop a gift off then she’s leaving. You should go say hi,” he added. 

Your 'hi’ wouldn’t be so friendly and you really didn’t want to hurt her.

Thankfully, Aeri yelled a cheerful goodbye and slammed the door shut just as you were halfway down the stairs. 

Guanlin had changed out into a more comfortable set of clothes, grey sweatpants and a black sweater. He sat on his bed and pat the space next to him, inviting you to join him.

A comfortable yet constrained silence settled between you and him. 

“Y/N? Are you angry with me?” He sounded so nervous and guarded you nearly burst into tears. “I’m sorry I haven’t spent as much time with you as I normally do." 

"It’s okay, I bet you enjoy it more with Aeri unnie,” you snapped, then a huge bulk of unease and guilt washed over you. 

You knew Guanlin was unpredictable and wasn’t exactly the best at managing his emotions, you understood, both of you were young. Your face changes as fast as you change outfits. 

Guanlin scoffed. “Are you seriously being like is? We’re friends!" 

"Well, it sure didn’t seem like it. I didn’t know you liked noonas more.” You were upset and angry…and acting purely on emotions. 

“If I did, I’d be dating her by now. Do you not trust me?” Guanlin yelled, jumping off his bed. “Do you trust me Y/N?" 

Your mouth was clamped shut. 

Guanlin chuckled and shook his head. "I knew it. I knew you couldn’t trust me. Do you think i’m so dumb to chase after noonas even when I have a girlfriend? Thanks Y/N. I get it, Aeri noona is gorgeous, she’s talented, she’s all every man wants but guess what, I thought I was doing the right thing by turning her down and being loyal to you. Turns out, you don’t trust me at all. That’s a key point in a relationship but now that I know ours doesn’t have one…I don’t know if I want to keep it,” he growled. 

“Guanlin, wait! I’m sorr-" 

"Save it! I don’t want to hear your damn excuses.”

“It’s not completely my fault! The nights spent together in the studio, cuddling! The tattoo! All those times you went out together looking like a couple! How can you think for a minute that I wouldn’t feel jealous!” You screamed, causing Guanlin to recoil in shock for you had never raised your voice at anyone, especially him. “Lai Guanlin. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you, but it isn’t my fault that I naturally felt envious because my boyfriend was constantly with another woman!" 

"So you’re going to blame me for how you feel? Is that so? Well, Y/N…I’m sorry about that but I’m sure you’re old enough to control your own emotions! God! Who knew I would be dating an emotional bitch?” He spat, running a hand through his hair and huffing in annoyance. 

You were stunned beyond words. Guanlin had never called anyone such a derogatory term. He realised what he had said and immediately, his posture changed. His face fell. “Y/N, I didn’t-" 

"I don’t care! I never thought I’d date an insensitive prick like you!” You pointed a an accusing finger at him, tears already streaming down your cheeks. “To think I wasted all my time and love on you." 

With that, you grabbed your bag and stormed out of his house, ignoring his desperate calls. 

… 

The night reflected how you felt, it was dark and stormy, rain fell from the skies endlessly. All you had been doing was laying face down on your bed, sobbing until your eyes hurt. You were grateful your parents hadn’t posed any questions, your mother had called you out to eat but left quickly when you ignored her. 

You curled up under your blankets, wearing Guanlin’s old sweater. It swamped you but it provided warmth and comfort. The fact that you might never see him again because of a stupid fight made you feel like the worst person in the whole world. You just hoped his friendship with Aeri wouldn’t be affected. 

Knock, knock. 

You refused to answer, pulling your blanket over your head and pretending to be fast asleep despite the rebellious tears that still rolled down your face. Wait, those footsteps are too heavy to be my mum’s…or dad’s. 

Guanlin. 

You kept your mask on even as Guanlin sat next to your bed, he was pretty tall so his face was right next to yours. You felt him lean his head against your bed, his hair nearly tickling your nose. 

"Ahhh Y/N, I was hoping you wouldn’t be asleep but I suppose today’s been really rough for you,” he muttered, not knowing you were listening. “It’s really all my fault. I never meant to yell at you or cause you heartache but I suppose I did and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I called you a bitch, you really aren’t. You’re the best, most awesome and swag girlfriend I could ever ask for. You always know how to handle situations well, I must have pushed you over the edge for you to yell at me like that.” He chuckled softly. 

More tears dampened your pillow. 

“Look at my jagi, crying even as you sleep. Please stop. I hope you aren’t dreaming of what happened today but you probably are and I regret it." 

You felt his fingers brush over your face as he wiped away your tears. 

"There’s a lot I wish I could say when you’re awake but I don’t have the courage to at all. Let’s talk more in the morning. Goodnight Y/N, I love you. Please don’t break up with me,” Guanlin whispered before pressing a soft kiss to your cheek and slumping down beside your bed. 

You were sure he was knocked out cold before you declared, “I would never dream of it." 

Guanlin awoke to you peppering tender kisses all over his face and running your hands through his fluffy hair. He was shocked but pleasantly surprised. 

"Y/N-" 

"I love you too. Let’s not break up." 

He beamed brightly despite how sleepy he was and pulled you in for a tight hug, rubbing circles on the small of your back.

"Goodnight jagi, sweet dreams." 

And in Guanlin’s arms, under your duvet, you sure did.

[stereksummerexchange]

Stiles The Pirate

@eternalsterek-broughttolife​ | AO3 - A back-up gift specifically requested by me, and seeing how everyone was able to get their gifts in, I’m going to gift it to myself haha (especially since this is the sweetest little fic).

by @poetry-protest-pornography

Stiles works at a water park, one day he finds a little girl with dark hair and intense eyes crying and has to help her find her family.

The familiar chlorine-sunscreen-warm pavement smell of Riverwood Water Park is a strange comfort as Stiles walks toward the staff locker room; nostalgia and fond memories always rushed through Stiles when he was at the park. The fact that this would–hopefully–be his last summer working there was both sad and exciting. 

It wouldn’t be easy saying goodbye to the place he’d visited so often with his mom and dad as a kid, the place where he had worked every summer since he was sixteen. Manning Pirate Cove, a scale model of a pirate ship designed for younger children, with slides where canons would be found and a swirling sprayer that moved with the ship’s wheel, had become his favorite summertime distraction. The enthusiasm and joy that little kids unabashedly threw into splashing each other and climbing and fun made Stiles feel joyous by proxy.

Closing his locker in the staff showers, he allowed himself to feel a little melancholy. Graduating and moving on to grad school that was no closer to his dad or his friends was hard. He’d always half planned on coming back to California, but he’d had to wave adios to that plan when a full scholarship offer came in for a program in Colorado.

It was going to be hard to have say goodbye to his coworkers, too. Some of them had been working with him since he started, and they’d grown up together, one summer at a time. They’d shared cookouts and after work meals, then after work drinks and dancing as they became old enough for it. End of season parties, bonfire hookups, summer flings. 

The thought of leaving Erica and Boyd especially filled him with disappointment; they’d been spending their summers together for the last five seasons, and they’d had more than a handful of those s’mores and summer heat-flavored nights. Now, they were the best of friends, speaking often even when Stiles was on the other side of the country and longing for summer and open-skied nights in his adequate but lonely student apartment.

That he would not miss. Even with the personal touches he’d managed to add, a half-sized kitchen, a shower with the water pressure of a jammed squirt gun, and barely enough room for a two-seater couch and a desk with a rolling chair never felt much like home.

Summers at Riverwood, though, that was definitely part of home for him. Permanent chlorine scent, shrieking kids, and all.

What wasn’t normal though, was a crying child. Yet, just inside the gate where he entered Pirate Cove, there was a young girl–around five if Stiles had to guess–rubbing the back of her hand over her eyes, fruitlessly trying to stop the tears spilling from her green and gold eyes. Her long dark hair was escaping from the tight braid she wore, and she clutched at her brightly striped towel like a lifeline.

Stiles pasted on his friendliest, most reassuring smile and stooped down so he was at her eye level. “Hi, sweetheart, my name is Stiles. Is there something that I can help you with? I work here, so if you’re lost, or if something happened that upset you, I can help.”

When she looked up at him, her lip was wobbling and she was taking big, shuddering breaths, but she was obviously trying to get herself to calm down; Stiles was impressed with her control.

“I was pl-playing in the wave pool, an’ then I thought I saw a bunny by the fe-fence, so I went t’ see it, but it was go-one!” she sobbed, getting more upset as she went on. “Then I got lost, and now I can’t find my-my-m-” she started crying again, too much now to finish her sentence, so Stiles put a cautious hand on her shoulder.

“Hey, that is something I can definitely fix,” he said, letting a little enthusiasm into his voice in the hopes that his confidence would reassure her. “Can you tell me your name?”

She sniffed, but gave him a wobbly smile and answered “Tali.” 

“Well, Tali,” he said, returning her smile, “Do you think you could hold my hand so we can stick together on the way back to the wave pool?” At her nod, he stood up, and offered his hand. Hers felt so small in his that he had a moment of panic at being responsible for someone so little. Then reality settled over him and his years of experience with kids kicked in as he rolled his eyes at himself. 

On the way past Pirate Cove, Stiles waved to get Boyd’s attention, glad it was his friend in the lifeguard seat so he could be assured that the kids playing in the Cove would be safe for a few minutes while he returned Tali to her family (the new kid, Liam, he wasn’t so sure about yet; he barely looked old enough to drive, let alone be responsible for children). “Hey, Boyd! I just have to take my friend Tali back to the wave pool. Be right back!”

Boyd waved back, nodding that he’d heard him, and Stiles turned back to Tali, looking down at her with another smile as they restarted their short trek to the wave pool. “Okay, kiddo?” he asks gently. 

“Yeah. But. Did you mean it when you said we were friends?” The sincerity in her voice makes Stiles heart break a little. This kid is just too… something.

“Of course I did! As long as you’re okay with having a friend who still reads comic books and believes in magic,” he replied with just as much sincerity. Those things were true, but in his experience, kids are more comfortable with adults they can relate to a little.

Tali’s eyes go wide and she smiles brightly. “You like comics! Who’s your favorite superhero? Do you like Spider-Man? Do you like werewolves?! How about fairies, do you believe in fairies? I like Tinkerbell, ’cause she builds cool stuff, but she’s a pixie, which is only kind of a fairy.”

Stiles couldn’t help but chuckle; it wasn’t often that he met someone who could talk as much as he did. They were almost to the wave pool, and Stiles started looking for a family with dark hair and a frantic expressions.

“Spider-Man is pretty great, but Batman is my favorite, and he’s kinda like Tinkerbell, right? He invents lots of stuff. Though he’s definitely not a pixie! I think werewolves are awesome, though, it’d be so cool to meet a werewolf, don’t ya think?”

Tali laughed, and it was the best thing Stiles had heard all morning; he couldn’t stand to see kids crying. “Batman would look silly dressed like Tinkerbell!”

“Ha! Yeah he would! Hey Tali? Do you remember where you were-” before Stiles could finish asking, the most attractive man Stiles had ever seen was rushing towards them, calling Tali’s name.

Tali let go of his hand and launched herself into the man’s open arms, a muffled cry of “Da-” disappearing into a strong shoulder. Stiles couldn’t help but notice the flex of the muscles in the guy’s tanned arms, or the dusting of dark hair that seemed to have been placed just-so by an artist on every perfect inch of him.

“Where have you been, peanut? I was so scared when I couldn’t find you!” The man’s voice is surprisingly soft, and he’s rocking Tali back and forth slightly as he cradles her against him. It’s almost too much for Stiles to bear watching, and it makes his heart beat out of sync; a strange and overwhelming sense of want settles in his belly, but he isn’t sure what it is for.

Tali begins to explain about the bunny again, a slight tremble in her voice as she pulls away from the man’s shoulder, small hands resting on either side of the guy’s neck. Her voice gets less wobbly and more animated as she continues “…An’ then my friend Stiles found me, and he brought me back! He works on a pirate ship, and he likes comic books, and he thinks werewolves are the coolest.”

The man looks up then, as if he’d only just realized he was standing there, his face doing something complicated as his (incredibly beautiful) eyes trace Stiles’ shape quickly. “Sorry, I- Thank you so much. I don’t know what happened–one minute she was right there–I must seem like a terrible-”

Stiles can’t let the poor guy continue to beat himself up. “Hey, no, it happens all the time, there’s a lot going on here, kids get distracted.”

“I really can’t thank you enough, uh, Stiles, right?” he asks as though uncertain he’d heard Tali correctly.

Stiles laughs lightly, “It’s a lot easier to say than what’s on my driver’s licence.”

“Stiles the pirate,” he says with a smile that makes Stiles’ heart and his breath speed up. He offers his hand and introduces himself with “I’m Derek.”

Taking a deep breath to make sure his voice is steady, Stiles takes Derek’s hand, mildly shocked at the electric feeling that rushes through him at the contact. “Nice to meet you, Derek.” Stiles feels Tali watching him, and he glances at her to find her head tilted and her eyes moving between him and Derek thoughtfully. He reluctantly slides his hand from Derek’s, vaguely aware he’s been holding it for longer than strictly necessary, and turns toward Tali. “And you, Ms. Tali, it was great to have someone to talk to about superheroes; most of my other friends don’t like them much. 

Tali beams at him and sticks out her arm to shake Stiles’ hand, which he takes with a dramatic bow that makes her giggle. When he straightens up, Derek is looking at him with a softly awed smile and eyes that are positively sparkling. “You’re silly,” Tali teases, “Can you play with us a while?”

She’s looking at him pleadingly, a slight pout and eyebrows pushed up high on her forehead for maximum cuteness. Her brows aren’t newly as impressive as her dad’s, but it’s enough to make him want to skip work. Derek’s face is doing a pretty decent job of mirroring Tali’s, and that is just wholly unfair.

If Stiles is looking at Derek more than Tali when he says “I really wish I could,” he can’t really be blamed. He manages to get it together to direct “I have to get to work now, kiddo,” at Tali. Both Derek and Tali seem to deflate a little, and Stiles feels strangely guilty. He blames the eyebrows. 

Derek rubs the back of his neck, balancing Tali in one arm, his eyes looking down at their feet for a moment before catching Stiles’ eye. “Maybe, uh. Maybe we can come and get a tour of your ship?” he asks hopefully, his ears turning a pleasing pink that has nothing to do with the afternoon sun. Stiles wants to taste the blush, see what else he can do to make it happen.

Tali excitedly asks, “Oh! Can we, can we, pleeease!” and Stiles feels his own face heat–thinking about what Derek’s skin feels like while he’s holding his kid, while he’s at work and surrounded by kids, is beyond inappropriate. Get it together, Stilinski he mentally chastises himself. Getting caught up in Tali’s wiggly excitement lets the heated mental images dissolve, and he can’t do anything but answer honestly, “I’d like that very much.”

Derek thanks him again as they part, and Tali calls “See you soon!” over Derek’s shoulder as they walk away. Stiles waves back, then has to actually shake his head to clear it before he heads back to Pirate Cove.

Boyd waves at him when he gets back, and Stiles goes to update his friend on what happened with Tali–and to talk about Derek a little. It’s a relatively quiet time at the Cove, lunch time usually is, as most families take the time to eat their picnic lunches or brave the lines at the food stands. Stiles is grateful for the fact that they only have half a dozen or so kids, instead of the twenty-five or so that they usually have, which is the upper limit on the number of kids allowed–and a lot to handle all at once. Stiles loved it though.

As he and Boyd caught up, pausing occasionally to warn kids about running, help fill buckets under the plank’s water spouts, or check in with the attendants on the other side of the shallow pool surrounding the ship, Stiles found his mind wandering back to Tali and Derek.

Was it ridiculous for him to hope for what could only be a summer fling with a guy who has a kid? Was it irresponsible to start something, if it was even an option? He’s pretty sure Derek was flirting with him, or at least was interested in flirting with him. And when they had touched, it was like every romance novel cliche about ‘electric contact’ suddenly made sense.

“Oh man, Stiles, you got it bad my friend,” Boyd teases in his quiet way. 

“You know me, when I fall, I fall… Only. He’s got a kid, and she’s amazing! Funny, and bright, I think she might talk even more than me! But she’s like, five. It’s not fair to just jump into a kid’s life like that. I’m leaving for Denver in two months. Plus, it’s not like I’m great with not getting emotionally attached; it’s not good for me to jump into something that can’t last either.”

Boyd hums his agreement, being well acquainted with Stiles’ tendency to dive in head first. “Sometimes, things work out,” he says sagely, looking slightly over Stiles’ shoulder with a wide grin.

Stiles turns around and finds himself flailing to stay on his feet as his legs are tackled by all forty pounds of Tali. Luckily, Derek was right behind her, and then he was right next to Stiles, catching him before he could wipe out and end up ass first on the unforgiving concrete. Stiles feels hot where they’re touching, his back half pressed against Derek’s very firm chest, Derek’s arm wrapped low around his waist. Stiles feels like he’s burning up. He might need to have Tali hose him down with one of the water canons…

Thankfully, Tali giggles then, again pulling him out of his thoughts. “Oops! Sorry, Stiles!”

“No problem, kiddo,” Stiles laughs, patting her hair and stepping away from Derek, missing his heat despite the warmth of the sun.

“It’s a good thing Uncle Derek caught you, or you coulda fallen down!”

“Yeah it’s a very good thi- Uncle Derek? I thought-” Stiles looked back and forth between Tali and Derek rapidly, processing the new information.

Derek huffs out an apologetic “Yeah, Tali’s my older sister’s kid. I love her lots,” he says, ruffling Tali’s hair and pulling her against his side, “But her mom’d be pretty mad at me if I tried to take her back to Boulder with me.”

“I bet. Though, it’s probably hard to say goodbye, right? I mean, Tali is probably the coolest kid I’ve ever met.” Stiles grins at Tali, gratified to see that she’s positively beaming at him.

Boyd clears his throat loudly, and Stiles hears the unspoken “You missed something, pal” in the sound. Stiles thinks back a couple seconds to find what it might be, and “Oh! You live in Boulder?”

“Yeah, I’m just here for the summer, visiting Tali,” Derek smiles, looking slightly confused about why Stiles is excited about where he lives, eyebrows quirked in amused concern.

Stiles can’t believe his luck! Two out of three of the obstacles in the way of a potential relationship with Derek are not, in fact, in the way at all! “That’s funny, I’m moving to Denver for my Masters in Criminal Psych in August.”

Derek smiles one of those eyes-scrunched-and-sparkling smiles that Stiles thinks he might become addicted to. “I’m at UC Boulder for my PhD in History, we’re practically neighbors.” Stiles is pretty sure he imagines the flirtatious tone in Derek’s voice, but he doesn’t care.

Tali pulls on Stiles’ arm, forcing him to tear his eyes away from Derek. Again. “Can you show us the pirate ship now?” At a look from Derek, she adds “Please?” and Stiles can’t help but laugh. He and Tali are going to get along just fine.

“Yeah, let’s go see the ship,” Derek starts before Stiles can answer. “Then later, maybe Stiles would like to have dinner?” Derek looks at Stiles hopefully, and if he had even been entertaining turning Derek down, that face would’ve changed his mind.

“That sounds great, I’m done at 5 o’clock” 

Derek smiles again, or his smile grows, really, and Tali adds “We can get hot dogs!” 

“I love hot dogs,” Stiles says, because he really does, but also, if he and Tali are going to be buds, he should remind her of the things they have in common. If he and Derek make it to an actual date, he thinks having someone with such good puppy dog eyes will be very handy.

Derek laughs, and it’s a great sound. “Sorry kiddo, I promised your mom I’d have you back by four.”

Tali pouts and looks so put out that Stiles stifles a laugh. Instead, he says “Hey, Tali, next time, we’ll totally go for hot dogs, okay?” 

She looks contemplative for a moment before nodding her agreement and taking him and Derek both by the hand, marching them toward the pirate ship. Derek looks at him over Tali’s head with an amused smirk “Next time, huh?”

Stiles lets a grin spread across his face. “Yep.”

“Good,” is all Derek says, but it sounds like a promise.

[survivor-rebelsvsroyals]

RITES OF PASSAGE

BACKGROUND MUSIC!!

Before we move into the final phases of the game, it’s time for a look back at the players who have fallen.

Asya - This is not the first game we’ve played together and I doubt it’ll be the last. Because you were one of the few people I knew coming into this, I was hoping that you and I might be able to work together. Sadly, I know you were really busy during the first round and there was really nothing I could’ve done to turn that train around without risking my own neck.

Dan - I was so sad we lost that first challenge because I would have loved to work with you. This is a classic “just submit SOMETHING” scenario and I’m so sorry you were the first to go. 

Dane - You were crazy but cool 

Lachie - sorry you couldn’t submit a puzzle, better luck next time 

Asya - So, from the start you were one of the people I had the weakest relationships with. It wasn’t anything personal, but we just didn’t have a close game relationship. Then I heard that you were throwing my name out - which may or may not have been true, that whole situation was very unclear because for the first half of that day I thought it was Raffy who’d been saying my name - and so when I heard you were the counter vote, I immediately jumped on board. If I was wrong, then I’m sorry, but with how high tensions were on that tribe, I really just had to go with my gut.

Dan - I’m not gonna lie, I really loved the OG tumblr vibe of seeing you, and then I remembered just how persistent you are. It’s so intimidating and that’s why voting you out was the best for my personal game. I feel like you were well connected and keeping you may have led to my downfall. 

Dane - Whew 

Lachie - It was nice getting to know you, I actually enjoyed chatting with you and you seemed like a v cool person. Sadly you had crackhead tendencies and you had to leave early :((

Asya - Brien, gone too soon. I wanted to work with you, because you expressed a lot of interest in working with me. However, I never really trusted Nic and Trace, so that made working with you incredibly difficult. Then you started throwing Dan under the bus and I couldn’t have that, so it had to be you at that point.

Dan - You’re such a sweetheart, even if you tried to VOTE ME OUT!!!! I really enjoyed getting to know you and you have a huge heart. Thanks for being awesome! 

Dane - Sorry for attacking you so much in paintball 

Lachie - no shade but don’t really remember you, sure your a babe tho xx

Asya - Hi Trace! You and were never super close in the game. Your vote out was super unfortunate because I know you saw it coming and I really appreciated your pitch to stay, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t go out on a limb for something I wasn’t 100% sure on, and I needed to stick with the people who I had full trust in. 

Dan - Your vote hurt me the most. I loved being hosted by you previously and I really enjoyed getting to know you this game on a personal level. The way things landed, I needed to remain loyal to my group and unfortunately we just didn’t talk to the same people.

Dane - :((( I’m so sad you weren’t able to vote me out again 

Lachie - I love u Trace!! I was so happy to see you were in this season because I loved you sm in I Love Money, ngl I was ready to work with you for the long haul but you are too good and had to die ://

Asya - Chloe, my love, I was seriously heartbroken when I saw the way the swap turned out. I truly meant what I said when I told you I wanted to stick together day one. If I had my way, it would’ve been you me and Dan going into the merge together, but I figured it was pretty much curtains when I saw the way you got fucked over numbers wise. You deserved to go farther and I’m sad our dream of losing together in FTC again died so soon. 

Dan - ROBBBBBBBBBT. Why do you always get robbed in games we play together??? You were definitely one of my closest allies in the early game and I would love to have continued our working relationship. Getting swap fucked sucks, but I’m sure you went down swinging ❤️

Dane - sorry you got the boot early you seemed fun 

Lachie - I was worried about playing with you again ngl because I’m BBUK our relationship was a MESS! We kinda just assumed we still didn’t really like eachother but I’m glad we spoke and actually sorted things out and got to know each other more. Sadly the tribe swap fucked you, really thought you were gunna go all the way tbh babe xx

Asya - Okay, so, Raffy. First impression of you was that you were the loud type who was gonna get himself into trouble. I liked you so much on a personal level, but I wasn’t sure how well that was gonna mesh with my game. In the second round when I was told you were throwing me UTB I had no reason not to believe it. In hindsight, though, I really do believe you were being honest with me, and I’m glad I didn’t vote you out. Would’ve loved to have had you in the merge because I really think you would’ve made it more exciting, but I hope me and the rest of the rebel squad made you proud.

Dan - YOU CRACKHEAD. I was so sad to see you go on one hand, but on the other I was ready to not have you delegate every single task! You have a heart of gold and you always do your best. Sorry you got swap fucked too. 

Dane - damn I’m lowkey surprised you got that far 

Lachie - you were a lot ngl

Asya - Hi Glo! So, firstly, I meant what I said when I told you I was really happy to be meeting you. I’ve only ever heard really nice things about you from my time in the community so I was really excited to play with you. Unfortunately, I was put in a really bad position in the swap and when it came down to it, I was gonna do whatever I had to do to save my own neck. Hope you understand and I still think you’re a legend.

Dan - Lying to you about the vote was one of the hardest things I had to do. It wasn’t easy because you’re truly the heart of the community. Know that you are loved and that we love you. Nothing personal, only game, and if you hadn’t gone, who knows what placement I would have gotten. 

Dane - I’m so sorry I had to lie to you and vote you out! I assumed you had the idol and you were working with the royal majority alliance, when in reality it was the person that helped me take you out. 

Lachie - sadly didn’t get to have a alola reunion with you :(

Asya - Okay so the fact that we didn’t get to interact in this game is SO ugly. I really didn’t expect to see you go so soon, though I get why you did, coming hot off Indonesia. Still sad we came that short of playing together again. Either way, I’ll talk to you soon. Hopefully not too soon but beggars can’t be choosers.

Dan - Hey! We never met so I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I was hoping we would be on the same tribe at some point. I’ve heard many great things about you, and even if we wouldn’t have worked together it would have been at least nice to meet! Hopefully I’ll see you in the reunion chat! 

Dane - ROBBED QUEEN JFCCCCCC I’m so upset that they snaked you but I hope you’re living your life to the fullest bc you deserve it <3

Lachie - hope your drawing skills have improved x

Asya - Alright, here’s where things get tough. Amanda, I really had every intention of trying to play with you in the merge. Obviously I knew you and Dan were close and since I’d been working with him all game, you’re someone I also wanted a game relationship with. The second I heard my name, I knew I was gonna play one of my idols. Who I was gonna idol out, I wasn’t really sure. I talked in circles before coming to the conclusion that you were the one pushing so heavily for me to go, so I knew that long term, you leaving was what needed to be done. Hope you understand it was all self preservation. 

Dan - I love you so much. You’ve been one of my best friends for over a decade now. You mean the absolute world for me and these games are the WORST possible thing for in real life relationships. I hope you know that you going was not ideal, but it did allow me to really establish an individual game. One of us was probably going to be booted early just because of our relationship and I’m so sorry it was you. ❤️

Dane Slightly upset you didn’t want to work with me after we worked well together in HoS but I understand since I’m a crackhead. Literally had no clue you were being idol’d out I just wanted to show loyalty to Asya but WHEW a moment ....

Lachie - never really spoke to you but I’m sure ur a star. Sorry Asya killed you

Asya - Well.

Here’s the skinny, Seamus. From the second I saw you in the cast I knew it was bad news for me. You know I think you’re great, but you’re also a crackhead, and I just couldn’t see a scenario where you and I worked together successfully. That alone wasn’t a reason to vote you out, because I was notoriously planning to vote out John that round, but a lot changed after that. Firstly, on the call I had with RTP, he more or less said that you and Linus were the kingpins on old Arioi and that was something I found easy to believe. Secondly, I heard you were the one pushing for Dane to go, which you then confirmed to me when we talked about it. Thirdly, after dropping some hints in her pms, Pippa said to me “I wish there was a way we could take Seamus out.” I knew I was gonna play my idol either way, but I wanted to have four solid votes just in case the majority split between Dane and Dan or Dane and John. In your words “I’m not gonna say I’m sorry for voting for you but good game,” because I’m not sorry, but only because I really believe you would’ve kicked my ass if I left you in the game any longer.

Dan - SKSKSKSKSKSK. Your blindside was satisfying for a lot of us. You’re just a good ass player and honestly we were all a little shook. I’m pretty sure you were way better connected than you led on, so getting you out early merge I think advanced my personal game pretty far. We’d always be crass and inappropriate in PMs and I thank you for making me laugh, and being such a dynamic character in this game, even if we didn’t work together. 

Dane - GOD you were the second biggest crackhead this game and I’m truly surprised people went along with your plans as far as you got!  All you did was take information from others and never create a mutual trust and that’s why you got idol’d out.

Lachie - a legend ugh the flavour. Actually really liked speaking to you for the short time we did, wish you could’ve gone further because I was excited to work with you.

Asya - So, I feel like coming into this game I had this super weird perception of you from like community lore and whatever, and it had me on my guard in basically every conversation we ever had. That started to melt away a bit after that one phone call we had, and I fully thought that was gonna be the start of a really strong alliance, but we both know how that ended. In general, you were just always a very scary player to me, and I really expected to be voted out the round you left. As a person, I think you’re awesome, but I’d be happy to never play a game with you again. All love <3

Dan - I love that we both fangirled a little bit at merge when we finally got to say hi to one another. Your old series really got me into games so I was so excited to see you. I am sad that we didn’t start on the same tribe because I think we would have definitely been working together. The numbers weren’t there for us and I’m so sorry that we couldn’t make more work! 

Dane - Sorry for blowing up your game HNNNNNN. Asya said before Seamus’s tribal “I have no more idols so we have to come up with something,” and I did fkfkfkfmf. You were truly a huge social threat in this game and I had to expose it. It was very nice to play with you again!

Lachie - I love you I was excited to be reunited with you again 🥺 sadly your just too good and ya had to go. Mwah 💖💖

Asya - The amount of stress I was under trying to keep you in this game Miss Pippa. Whew. When I told you I was gonna die in the sword for you as my ally I meant it, I really did. I didn’t expect you to become the majority’s target so fast, then all of a sudden there were rumors flying about god knows what, and you were busy that night, and I really tried up to the Very last second, but ultimately there was nothing I could do. It sucks, and I thought that it was gonna be the end of my game, but I had to lose big at some point. You know I adore you outside the game and I’m really glad you (probably) don’t hate me.

Dan - You’re such a crackhead and I love that about you. Whether you were going around trying to stir up trouble, or just talking to me about how busy our lives were, I appreciate you as a player. This isn’t a suck up, but honestly you’re so funny and keep people on their toes. You’re gonna be forward and blunt, and working with you, albeit, for only like one and a half rounds, really showed me how you can play and be a little snake. Loved playing with you! 

Dane - THE BIGGEST CRACKHEAD OF THE SEASON! A QUEEEEEEEEN! You were a HOT mess and I lived for every second of it. Literally you were SET and then you started spreading lies to your allies and it got so messy fkfkfkfkfkf. I’m truly sorry you had to leave the game but it was so much fun working with you for the short time

Lachie - sorry you couldn’t get me out babe x

Asya - I’m very grateful you voted to keep me on NuArioi, but after that… I really don’t know what happened. You said you were worried about me flipping once we got to the merge, then you flipped on me without a word. I tried to work with you after that too, but despite you saying you didn’t wanna hurt mine or Dane’s game, we never saw eye to eye. I’m sorry our needs never aligned, and I’m sorry things went the way that they did in the end.

Dan - Linusssssss. I was so happy when we swapped together and started working together. You’re somebody that I knew I could and  would work with if given the opportunity. I think a combination of you going when you did was partial bitterness from our old alliance, and a real fear of your ability to socially and strategically work people. You were sitting pretty and that was super threatening. It was only a compliment to your game, going when you did. 

Dane - whew the biggest snake in the mf game. I truly don’t know what to say except I’m glad I got Nigel out xoxoxo BAAAAAAAAAH 

Lachie - legend status. Another robbed king that had to leave because of and idol. You got done dirty and I was excited to play this game with you. Something about speaking to a non US player just hits different

Asya - Ryan, you and I didn’t have that much of a relationship at all. We might’ve spoken the least of everyone, which is on me as much as on you, but it meant it was very easy for us. I think we probably spoke the most the night you were voted out which is unfortunate, and essentially why I wanted you out for such a long time. That and I’m pretty sure you had a way better relationship with most of the jury than I did. I think you’re a super cool guy though and I’m glad we got at least one ½ tribals together before you left. 

Dan - Thank you for putting the past in the past for us. And most importantly, thank you for holding me accountable for when I say stupid heat of the moment shit. I need more people to do that for me. You showed me that regardless of what the past is, you can only change the future. I hope you know that I appreciated it so much and it meant the world to me to just have a normal convo with you. 

Dane - You’re the only one who truly appreciated my memes this game ty king xo glad to have played another game with you! 

Lachie - an evil slut that I adore. Can’t help it that ur popular and people felt intimidated by that :((

Asya - John, I’m honestly surprised that you and I both made it as far as we did. It seemed like we were totally on the same page all of the first phase of the game, then come the swap we just were fully out of sync. We finally came together again on the RTP vote, but sadly, that was the end of our individual interests aligning I think you’re such a good and kind person, and I hope we can be cool after the game because I’m really happy that I got to meet you.

Dan - Legend. I feel like we were so awkward in this game for now reason!!! I got the vibe that we wanted to work together we just didn’t know how. We were trusting different people, Amanda went early, and we just lost what we had going. Socially you’re an incredible player and you leaving was a huge jury threat out for everyone, which only speaks to your personality and gameplay. 

Dane - Joe my man in every game we truly never end up on the same side and it sucked to have to go against you again. I do commend you though for starting a Snapchat streak with me after you realized you weren’t with the numbers and then ending it after you got voted out ckfkfkfkfk 

Lachie - another BBUK legend, another robbed legend. I really wanted you to stay but sadly nobody wanted to risk rocks. I really didn’t think you’d be the rebel I ended up being closest to but ummm it happened lmao. Ur a sweetheart and I enjoyed every sec of play with ya again xx

Asya - Ruthie, I’m so glad I got to meet you in this game. I think you’re one of the sweetest people I’ve ever played with. I enjoyed talking to you when we did, and I’m sorry we never seemed to click on a game level. I never fully felt like you and I were able to be completely honest with one another, and so it was hard to strategize or anything like that, especially in the late game. I wish you all the best and I hope you’re not too upset.

Dan - OOOOOOOF. Girl, voting you out was hands down the hardest thing I’ve done this whole game. You’re so kind and I enjoyed getting to know you better. Loyalty to the people I’m with the earliest in the game unfortunately superseded what we had. I hope that you’re not upset with me or bitter about it. I just thank you for helping me get to this point and I definitely need you to know that given different circumstances, you’d be going all the way to the end with me. 

Dane - god talking to you was so hard this game because Dan would tell Asya and I what you were saying but when I’d ask you you’d just straight up lie to me fkfkfkfkgkgkg there were so many times that I just wanted to call you out but I needed you to not COMPLETELY despise me and be helpful in a couple votes. On the other hand though it was very refreshing to talk to you since you were actually nice to people in this game. Sorry we had to vote you out ! 

Lachie - ROBBED!! Wish you were still here, i was SO excited to finally play a game with you after seeing you around for ages. And you sure did live up to the hype, you’re just so nice and real ugh a breath of fresh air in these games tbh. Sorry people felt the need to lie right up until the end :(( luv ya 

[kaywritesthings]

Handsome Moxi

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack was pissed off and had a screamng new siren to deal with. He wasnt as 'nice' to her as he was to his daughter. She lived in a safe palace. She lived in a cyclinder. Handsome Jack was done being nice and having fun. He kind of enjoed the vault hunters running around doing pointless missions and trying to get him down. Handsome Jack found amusement in it. Surely, everyone would move on, but then Roland and his dumb ass troops and his dumb ass city couldnt leave it alone. So what if he controlle a monster. It wasnt to kill everyone, probably. It was to find vaults, and more vaults. To make a better pandora. Fucking judge him, no one was good here.   If they could control the monster they would. For fun, jack put lilth in a electrotic vase type prision, she touch the wall it would hurt like hell. Fuck all. Fuck her. She was the whole reason he had to wear a mask anyway. He did mourn his little girl. Even if she did hate him. He held her in his chair and just looked over her dead bodie for hours. Telling her he was sorry and he would defend her like the hero he is.

Moxxi: Moxxi figured there was something incredibly naive about her expecting everything to just turn out okay.  She'd always played both sides of the field, and there had always been collateral damage, but it had never been anyone Moxxi was close too.  She was close to the superstars, the big time hitters, and they never died.  Not really.  And Moxxi always imagined a world were she could do that for the rest of her life.  Play both sides and win.  But now she was standing outside, ignoring the drops of rain piddling down onto her umbrella while they buried Roland into Sanctuary's dirt.  That coupled with Jack's screams of vengance, and the last sad sweet ECHO she'd gotten from Angel (I want this, I want to be free, stop him) made it very clear to her that there was no picking a middle ground anymore.  One side or the other was going to be obliterated, and there was nothing Moxxi could do to stop it.  Things had gone to far, and it wasn't fun anymore.  This wasn't random bandits or psychos, or people that wouldn't be missed.  Not anymore.  Moxxi carefully dabbed a few tears away before it started to fuck up her makeup.

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack had to bury her alone. After two days of her dead body just laying across a chair. He decided it was time. He put her in a casket and buried her the wall of one helios. He couldnt put her in the ground. She was better than that. He put her name on the stone wall piece. She may have hated him, but he didnt hate her. He loved her, that's why his password was I love you.   He felt so angry after he ran his hand over her name. He went on his echo and yelled at any bandit who wanted to kill the child killer to leave that for himHe wanted that for himself. He looked at his echo for moxxi, she probably hated him too. He knew in the end, she'd pick their side. He picked up his echo and called the sheriif who said she would be right over

Moxxi: Moxxi never anticipated her bar turning into the place for a wake, but that seemed to be what happened afterward.  The newbies were running around still carrying on the good fight or however they wanted to characterize it, but everyone else was here, sidled up to her bar and Moxxi just poored the drinks and refused the cash, for once, and looked at the dark sea of people in their finiest black.  As fine as it could be, anyway.  Scooter looked uncomfortable, and Moxxi reached over to touch his hand lightly.  "Scooter, you can go back to the garage, honey," she murmured, and he seemed relieved to get away from it and back to a place he understood.  Moxxi wanted to ask everyone what actually happened, but then she wasn't sure she wanted to know.  Many people could take her as someone who didn't love anyone, but the truth was she loved everyone, in her way.  She could very easily imagine what Jack was feeling right now, because she'd know how she'd feel if someone even touched her children, but then she'd replay Angel's voice in her head and feel caught in the middle again.  She wanted to call him, but she didn't know what she could say.  Or if he'd even want to hear from her.  Eventualy, much later, she sent him a small message with just a few words.  "I'm sorry, Jack."

Handsome Jack: Handome Jack sat in his bed, the sheriff naked beside him asleep. Even sex didnt cure anything. He just wish shed leave now and he could go back to making the bandits lives misrable. He was shocked to see Moxxi message and sat up. He slipped out of bed and went to the next room "For which part? My little girl being murdered or that no ones killed me yet for killing a grown man who was weak ?"

Moxxi: Moxxi felt her lips purse into a careful frown when she did get a reply from Jack and Moxxi made sure her door was locked up tight before sitting down to really reply.  "I think you're an evil bastard Jack, but I don't want you to die," she said carefully.  "I am sorry your little girl died, but I spoke to her-" Moxxi said and then stopped, swallowing hard.  "You can go blaming everyone else, but part if the blame is on you, and you know that."  Moxxi didn't want this to turn into what it was turning into and sighed.  "I'm sorry about Angel.  That's what I'm sorry about."

Handsome Jack: "HA!" He said when she started to scroll him. "Thanks mother." He rolled his eyes and sat back. "She was like Ellie. She thoughtYOU guys were her best friends forever. She was like thi as a kid, always mad at me for killing her mother or for not letting her play with other kids. You have NO idea what she did to other kids. " He told Moxxi. "So maybe rewind that judgement, I dont see Ellie wanting to be anywhere near you " He bit back. "I had to bury her by myself.. whiel none of you cared."

Moxxi: "Ellie might hate me but I didn't keep her locked up in a cage and make her a junkie on that eridum like you did," Moxxi replied her voice breaking just a little bit.  "Jack, you don't want any of us to care.   If any of us showed our face and tried to help you, you'd just kill us."  Moxxi wiped her eyes again.  "Well, that's all I wanted to say. I do care about you Jack.  And her.  More than you know."

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack wasnt sure what her definitiion of caring was. She didnt care. No one did. No one ever did. It was lonely road being the hero. "Dont. Just dont." He said. He heard someone run into moxxi room and yell. "WE GOT A HANDSOME JACK PINATA! we all think you should hit it first, because you are hot and because mordecai said you two did it, and then he got drunk and now is passed out." He said. Handsome jack rolled his eyes. "A pinata?" He said. The man paused at the door. "Whoa moxi, you sounded just like him!"

Moxxi: Moxxi was damn sure she'd locked the door, she'd made doubly sure and she was so annoyed that someone had managed to burst in without her asking she lifted a pistol and shot him in the chest.  "Does no one resepct a woman's privacy!" she cried, and kicked his bleeding body out of the door, slamming it and locking it again.  "Fine.  Goodbye Jack," Moxxi said and cut off the communication.

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack heard a shot and lifted a brow. He sighed and rubbed his head. "Bye Moxxi. " He sighed. He tossed his echo at his feet. He felt the sheriff arms wrap around his neck and he held her hands. "You ... want to do this? Married thing?" he asked. She laughed out loud. "Seriously?" He sighed "Yeah.. maybe not... " He stood up. He went to the window and looked out it. "I should go." She said. "Call me later?"

Moxxi: Moxxi wanted someone to ask her if she was okay, but doing that she'd have to admit to some things that she didn't want to admit to.  And admit how deeply fucked up everything was.  Moxxi was used to that, but not when it pertained to her.  Not like this.  She felt like she was trapped.  She was indebted to these people, not just because they made a safe place for her and always looked the other way when she played for the other team when it behooved her, but they protected Scooter and gave him a place and a status that he'd never have anywhere else.  Not back where he'd grown up at least.  They could give it to Ellie too, if she'd just want it...  Moxxi sighed and closed her eyes, feeling a few more tears linger on her eyelashes. But she still loved Jack.  No matter what. That was the worst part.  He could do anything up to kill everyone she knew and make her watch and she'd still probably love him.  That scared he rmost of all.

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack didnt go down to angel's place. He kept lilth there, the bitch had got them vault hunters safely somewhere. So they were probably plotting his death He saw Rolands death as an eye for an eye. Handsome jack warned them so many fucking times to leave things alone. He did that. They didnt warn him about anything, and angel. She believed in them. She was brained washed into thinking THEY were the good guys. He sat in his office and played around with his echo watching for moxxi to call, but she didnt. He mumbled to himself and turned on her echo "Hey balloon tits... you ever want toget out of there an race cars around in circles until you black out. I got a place to go for that."

Moxxi: Moxxi slept a little bit, but not much.  The whole town seemed to have a dark cloud over it, though people were working hard to pretend like there wasn't.  It was depressing and Moxxi went down to the bar and served drinks and flirted and danced around, while not really feeling it deep down like she used to.  It seemed that false cheer was even coming from Jack too, when he decided to call in with his idea of a pet name. "Is that really what you want to do right now, sugar?  Race some damn cars?  Because I don't.  And I don't think that's what you really want either."

Handsome Jack: "What's wrong with racing cars? " He rolled his eyes. "Fine, to be honest. I want to tit fuck my pain away. I doubt that's what you want to do, with all those girl feeling you have going on right now." He said. "Tell you what, toots. You let me tit fuck you and I will take some of the pain off lilth, maybe, probably. fun fact. This is how she sounds to me. Please get these restrains off me so I can kick you ass you son of a bitch." He mocked. "Some people you know? "

Moxxi: Moxxi scoffed and felt her fists clench up just a little bit.  "When have I ever had girl feelings, Jack? I think you're projecting."  She sighed.  "You can fuck my tits all you want, but you better get me off too, because I'm not doing it out of charity." She felt herself stiffen when he started mentioning Lilth, and swallowed.  "I know stunning how people reject being caged up like an animal.  Where do you want to meet."

Handsome Jack: "Common, that's fun. I'd like to cage you." He teased. He was trying to feel normal, wahtever that meant. "Opportunity. You can see the new statues I'm bulding of me putting a giant size dildo up zeros ass. It's the best statue ever. " He said. "And the one where axton is naked, but has a grape dick. oh man.' He laughed. "you'll get off. I never ignore your needs, pumpkin."

Moxxi: "You could try, sugar," Moxxi replied, giving into the urge to pretend like nothing had changed, if that was what Jack wanted.  "Do you even know if Zero has an ass?" she said politely and then laughed lightly.   "I'm starting to think he really is a robot, I can't get him to have sex with me, and no living human could resist."  Moxxi hummed.  "You're really going to make them all stars, aren't you? I can't wait to see what you have planned for the others."  Moxxi sighed.  "I can get away in a couple of hours, Jack.  It's harder now.  People are asking more questions."

Handsome Jack: "So what, let them ask. Why are you so ashamed of me? You've always been that way, havent you?" He huffed. "Whatever babe, tits,fucking.. less whatever this is." He said. "Come to the north gate, wear a blonde man or woman skin, I dunno. Tell me when you are at the door. I will have to scan you throughly.. so no fucking funny business. "

Moxxi: "You call it being ashamed, I call it survival, sweetie.  If I didn't tell everyone we'd broken up, I wouldn't have a place here right now."   Moxxi pursed her lips.  "You act like it's not a bigger risk for me than it is for you.  I'm not out to kill you Jack, and you just promised to kill everyone I know. Inculding me, if you think about it."

Handsome Jack: "It's called survival. And whoa whoa, wait. You wanted to fuck  Zero? What the hell moxxi?" He recalled. "In the end, when the gun is pointed to my face. You will be the one to call them to pull the trigger. I'm a very intelligent man, Moxxi... "

Moxxi: Moxxi rolled her eyes. "I want to fuck everyone, Jack, isn't that what you're always saying?" Moxxi replied.  "And aren't you even a little curious? He's got that deep voice but hips like a woman."  Moxxi huffed.  "And you won't be the same for me?"

Handsome Jack: "I dont think I can titty fuck you knowing you wnt to fuck, waht's probably slim and a voice box, or a robot. I have some robots you can ride if you want though.. by all means, make a loaderbots life." He teased. "And arent I the guy you tell everyone you let go, was too clingy... ?" He said. "Would I tell people to kill you? Why on earth would I do that? I rather keep you here in a box forever and fuck you when I need to. It's not right fucking a corspe... Although, knowing your team... they probably all do."

Moxxi: "Please, Jack," Moxxi said, letting her voice turn into a purr.  "You know that tits better than mine don't exist.  You can't resist them, no matter how much you try."  Moxxi laughed, in a sultry way.  "Oh Jack, honey, you need to relax. Every man is clingy, with your jealousies and wanting to be the only man, like one dick can satisfy a girls every need.  If you really put me in a cage, you wouldn't be as excited by me and you know it. Just sit tight and I'll be there soon."

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack rolled his eyes and took a shot. "Except my cock is actually everything you want and need, or you wouldnt come back. See you soon, princess. " He said as he went down to the gate and leaned agaist the wall outside his protective walls. Bring on a vault hunter, he was ready to take them out. He saw Moxxi come up (idk if shes in a skin) "Hey.. Put your hands over your head, and let me do a body ... search." He ran his hands down her waist and up herto her breast

Moxxi: That was true enough, but Moxxi didn't like revealing everything.  She couldn't do that.  It would be like letting Jack win over her completely and Moxxi didn't like being the one that lost.  She busied herself getting things in order so she could leave and slipped out while no one was paying too much attention.  She came alone and under cover as she usually did, but didn't bother dressing like anything but herself, though she did wear a cloak that covered her face until she got close enough.  "Jack, do you really think I'm stupid enough to try something on your own terf?" Moxxi said with a pout, lifting her hands above her head and crossing her wrists, tilting her hips to give Jack a good visual while he ran his hands over her.

Handsome Jack: Handsome Jack slid his hands under her breast. He pressed his chin between her breast. He licked her neck, and lifted her boobs and dropped them to see them bounce. He really needed this right now. He slid his hand between her legs and cupped her sex. He removed her panties to the side with her middle finger, he slid his finger inside her and pressed against her clit. "Ok, you seem.. fine." He removed his hands fro her and turned. "Welcome to opportunity."