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prettieinpink · 21 days ago

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2024 WRAPPED⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

₊˚⊹♡TOP LESSONS LEARNT

Missing out gives you progress on your goals. So many times this year, I didn’t do things that I usually would’ve loved to do to make and maintain progress on my

goals. Simple things like cancelling plans, buying certain things and any other short-term pleasures. Allowing myself to overcome FOMO, and in return, I saw great progress in my goals.

People hating you has nothing to do with you. I dislike a lot of things because it's my personal preference. Someone who decides to hate you is a matter of their preference. However, if they choose to show that hatred to you, it's a matter of projection. People will project onto you as a way to cope with their own life, cause they can’t deal with their own.

Stop letting everything control you. Truly, you’re held back from nothing in life. Your circumstances, identity, environment and more can only hold you back so far. At one point, you’ve gotta start acting and stop blaming everything around you on why you can’t. This one… is still in progress for me. I do feel like my parents are a major factor in me being held back, but deeper down, I also feel that it's an excuse to not work up to my potential.

Trying to fit in is fruitless. I wear and listen to what I want. I decide what kind of content I want to consume, and what food I want to eat. This generation is notorious for tearing down anyone who doesn’t fit in a cookie cutter. Allowing your authenticity to shine through, will guide those who are meant for you, to you!

All problems are temporary. This one does not apply to everything, but it applies to a lot of things. Your issues will not last forever, so don’t let it leave a permanent mark on you. Don’t let your situation deter you from your goals.

₊˚⊹♡ACHIEVEMENTS

It's small, but I feel like I’ve created my room to be fully intentional for me. While it still can be improved, my room is much better in terms of clutter and decor compared to 2023.

Consistent practicing soft social skills like keeping up small chats, giving compliments and handling disagreements gracefully. I ended the year with all B’s! Last semester was a bit of a flunk for me, but I managed to pull it up for the end of the year.

Saved like 500$ for purchasing things off my wishlist.

Read like 12ish books for 2024. Would’ve loved to read more, but I was in a reading slump and also didn’t have enough time to go out to my local library to borrow any books.

₊˚⊹♡HABITS / RITUALS

In bed by 9 pm, up by 6 am. Sleeping early has made me feel a lot more energised in the mornings, and I find that it's easier to get out of bed and continue with my routine. The later I slept will more I felt sluggish for the next day + waking up earlier hay motivated me to stay on top of my routines.

Daily walks after school. It gets my steps in, but it's a nice way to debrief after school and regather myself before heading straight into studying. I sometimes do walk home, and it's great to plug in my earphones and just not think.

Journaling. I preach it for a reason, as journaling helps plenty. It can help you to shift your mindset beliefs, identify self-sabotaging behaviours, allow us to truly reflect on who we are and see progress each day in our lives.

Lighting candles more frequently. It's such a little habit, but it brings me so much joy. Usually, they’re just collecting dust as decor however when I started to use them, I loved the whole experience. The smell and the small warmth that it brings are just perfect for the ambience.

Curating my social media. I have an absolute maximum of 5 hours per day, but I still want those 5 hours to count for something. I’ve redownloaded TikTok earlier this year, and I think it’s a great platform for looking for advice and inspiration. Creating a feed that works for you instead of the other way around, will definitely change how it influences you.

Having alone time in the morning and at night. I need this time to myself to slow myself down and regather my thoughts and it's just what I look forward to, to get through the day. I usually do whatever I like in this time slot, on the condition that I am completely by myself, free from any tasks or distractions.

Cleaning regularly. When I did a deep clean last year, it would just be vacuuming my room and wiping down all visible surfaces. That is good, but there’s a lot more to clean than you realise. One major thing that we forget to clean (yet is probably the dirtiest) is our devices. Wipe down all screens every single day!

₊˚⊹♡BEAUTY / FASHION TIPS

Turn down the toilet seat when you flush. The amount of times I’ve been in public toilets and flushed with the lid up is outrageous, and I just can’t believe that last year I didn’t even consider the bacteria that would fly up on my clothes or even my face. Not a major skincare tip, however, er I think this would affect it.

Know your undertone. I would only use undertones to know what kind of jewellery fits me, but it goes way beyond that. Before I start, I would like to say, don’t buy any more clothes or makeup just because they don’t fit your undertone. If you like your confidence will override any undertone clash. I used to walk around with really yellow makeup, and the difference when I got a foundation that had more of a golden undertone was like day and night. The same applies to your clothes. Warmer clothes will complement me, becausI’m’m warm-toned. So, I tend to stay away from cooler tones. I don’t use colour seasons, Is anyone wondering?

Stick to a palette that you like. Last year, I wasted so much money trying to experiment with new colours in my clothes and makeup, just to end up hating it. It’s also a bad consumerist habit, to buy things for your fantasy self. So today, I only buy clothes it's the colours I like and I only purchase makeup if its shades fit me. I’m not saying buy anything new, but keep it to a minimum to reduce waste and save your money for the things that you like.

Avoid fashion inspiration with faces. Highly attractive people can pull off anything, quite literally. Their face can influence subconsciously them ly to love the outfit, even if the outfit is ‘bad’. So, when saving pictures from Pinterest, TikTok or magazines, avoid any outfits that show their face. I said avoid it as sometimes you just really like an outfit and you know it's nothing to do with their face, which is okay.

₊˚⊹♡YOUTUBERS

JIlLZ GUERIN - Focuses on feminine energy, lifestyle and intellectual habits. I recommend her as many of her videos are new and fresh perspectives.

SANDY DIANA BANG - Mostly productive vlogs that inspire and motivate, with a sprinkle of wellness, health and beauty content. Her channel and vibes are so aesthetic too!

ROSIE GRAHAM & LIDIA MERA - Both are fitness influencers that focus on pilates. Their workouts are so good that they always leave me sweating and strained (which is good!! lmao). If one of your goals for 2025 was to start working out, I would use their videos.

THANK YOU BUBU - Another fitness channel that is one of my time faves, and they have a variety of exercises that target abs, glutes, legs and arms. Another channel I would recommend if I was starting to exercise again.

MINA LE - She does research and creates video essays on various topics, which many videos I feel are relevant in current times. She’s great if you want to expand and explore new perspectives.

HALIEY GAMBA - She’s for a more matured audience, but she’s such a hidden gem. All of her advice ly new things, not just the same things that have been rinsed and repeated.

KELLY GOOCH - She’s a beauYouTuberber who mainly discusses the beauty industry and its products while recommending some. She’s one of the only beauty influencers who I will listen to, as I feel like her opinions aren’t constantly swayed by sponsorships or promotions. Even then I would still take any beauty opinions and advice with two cents.

ELLE CHU - A smaller, but underrated beauty influencer. She discusses a lot of beauty products whether they’re worth it, overhyped or overpriced. She does sometimes talk about the beauty industry, but those videos are infrequent.

₊˚⊹♡BOOKS

(I have read all of them libby- a reading app).

NJUTA by NIKI BRANTMARK. All about the Swedish art of enjoying the present. If you feel like you have a simple and unexciting life, I recommend you read this.

SPARK JOY by Marie Kondo. A popular decluttering book that uses the KonMari method that emphasises items that you want to keep, instead of focusing on what you want to get rid of.

THE HEALTHY MIND TOOLKIT by Dr Alice Boyes. This is the ultimate guide of mindset shifts to target self-sabotaging or destructive beliefs and gives strategies to overcome them.

MINDFULLNESS ON THE GO by Jan Chozen Bays. A collection of little mindfulness practices you can do almost anywhere, almost anytime.

MY WISHES FOR 2025

To join any club at this point. It's hard for me to do anything outside of the house with my parents' schedules, and I do feel like it has eaten at my social life and the experiences, lessons etc I would gain. At first, I originally wanted to join so it's something I could put on my university application, however, I’m entering year 10 with absolutely no extracurriculars since year 7. (for anyone not down under, I'm talking about high school grades.)

Expanding my social circle. I feel like I don’t have a secondary community outside of school, and it's definitely what can amplify my slumps or depression without having that one person I can talk to freely, without the worry of school. I feel like I’m making no sense here.

Moving anywhere. I want to move schools, cities, countries, or whatever. Being in the same school since year 2 (elementary) has taken a toll on me.

A million dollars. Very unrealistic, but I still want it! I feel like money is the only thing that can actively change my life at this point.

thats it for this post! I encourage anyone else to do their own wrapped and tag me!

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jockbroski34 · 6 months ago

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AlterEgo

The last thing I expected on my 20th birthday was to receive a gift from Cody, my roommate. We were never close, and there was no way in hell he actually knew much about me to know it was my birthday without me telling him. Him and I were basically complete opposites. While I was your typical nerd, smart, introverted, and so on, he was basically your typical jock in all the worst ways. He was boisterous, arrogant, and a total meathead. We mostly agreed to stay out of each others’ way, considering our irreconcilable differences, but that didn’t stop him from being a massive pain in the ass. His room was constantly in a state of disarray, with sweaty clothes scattered all over the place. As such, I often avoided being anywhere near his room if necessary since it smelled like a locker room. He often invited over his “bros” who were just as bad. Whether they were hogging the TV to watch whatever game was on, smuggling alcohol into our dorm to get wasted, or playing catch in the fucking living room, they were always a nuisance. And whenever I brought any of that up to him, he would always end up saying something like “It’s not that serious, dude. We were just having a good time.” Yeah, a good time at my expense. Whoever assigned the two of us to live together must’ve thought this was some twisted joke.

I woke up at 9 AM, still a little tired from last night. I hung out at one of my friends’ dorms to celebrate my birthday. I yawned, and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast. I saw Cody was up as well, his legs spread across the couch, to the point that he was taking up two seats, watching something on the TV that was several volume levels too loud for me.

“Hey bro, today’s your birthday right?” Cody asked, as he tilted his head to face me.

“Uhh, yeah. How did you know?” I responded.

“Oh don’t worry about it, bro. Happy birthday!” I saw him get up and run to his disorganized room, likely to grab something for me. I could see a pair of worn gym shorts on the floor through the crack in the door. He pulled out an old Nike shoe box, since he likely had nothing better to put a gift in. “I’ve been saving this for you. I hope you like it!” Is this his way of trying to get on my good side?

I rolled my eyes since I doubt he got me anything I would enjoy. He probably just got me something that he’d enjoy, like some tight-fitting tank top or protein powder or something. Not that I work out or anything. The only gift I’d want from him is for him to stop being a douche. I opened the box and I was surprised about what I saw. It was a video game. Not any that I’d ever heard of. I looked at the box art and the words AlterEgo were written in a wacky, colorful font.

“Yeah, I knew you like video games, so I found this for you. I heard on the internet that it’s pretty nitch…nichy…what’s the word…”

“Niche?” I responded. I had to admit, him struggling to pronounce the word right was a little amusing. As amusing as being with a simpleton like him could be.

“That’s the word! I got it for myself, but I realized like half an hour in that it wasn’t my thing. I’m happy with what I have right now. I figured you’d probably get more out of it than me.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

“No problem, dude. Anyways, I gotta hit the gym. I’m gonna be out all day so you have the PS5 all to yourself. Hope you enjoy it bro!”

I watch him leave, thankful to have some peace and quiet. As I ate breakfast, I read the back of the cover in order to figure out what this game was about.

“Become a new you! In this life simulation adventure, you can become any kind of person you want and live any way you choose. Control your fictional avatar, your AlterEgo, and level up your stats to become closer to your true self.”

The game seemed something like The Sims or Animal Crossing, but with some stat progression system. It was a game that I had never heard of, but it could be some hidden gem. The rest of the back was filled with screenshots from the game with the cartoony characters doing activities such as cooking, jogging, and riding a motorcycle. I figured I might as well try the game since I did get it for free. Even if it was from Cody, I wasn’t one to refuse someone’s generosity.

I put the game in the disk slot and booted it up. The title screen had that same logo and some bubbly background music. I pressed the start button and I was presented with a save selection screen. I noticed that Cody’s save was on there, which was odd because I was playing on my account. I knew I should’ve put a password on it. I wanted to make my own character, but part of me was curious about the character that he made. Knowing him, I can only guess. His game time was less than an hour, as he was only on Day 1, and he likely spent most of that time on the character creation screen.

I started his save and my character was sitting in his room. At this point, it was very bare, with only a bed and a bunch of cardboard boxes scattered around the room. I guess the character starts by moving into their new home? I went into the menu to find more information about the character. The character was named Cody obviously and his AlterEgo somewhat matched him too. I went into the stats screen and I was greeted by a tutorial.

“Here you can check your AlterEgo’s stats. You have already set your initial growth modifiers and assigned your base stats. If you need a refresher, whatever stats you chose your AlterEgo to excel at are highlighted in red and the ones you chose to trade off are highlighted in blue. This means that your AlterEgo will grow in the stats in red much faster and prioritize activities that increase those stats and avoid activities associated with increasing your stats in blue. As you play, your AlterEgo will naturally develop into one of hundreds of potential archetypes based on the activities that they excel at. Experiment and see who you become!”

I looked at the stat screen and saw a list of stats with a bar indicating percentage level. The stats included Strength, Constitution, Dexterity, Intelligence, Wisdom, Courage, Charisma, and Luck. Not too far off from DnD I guess. It seemed like he chose to have Strength and Constitution as his highest stats as their font was colored red and Intelligence and Wisdom as his weakest stats as they were colored in blue. Gee, why am I not surprised… Cody was anything but a genius. It seemed like he had 20 initial points to allocate wherever he chose with a default limit of 5. And I was equally not surprised to find that my meathead roommate chose to put 5 in Strength and Constitution again like a barbarian. It’s like all he cared about was his looks and perceived masculinity, even in game.

Strength (physical strength): 5

Constitution (physical build and stamina): 5

Dexterity (agility and flexibility): 2

Intelligence (knowledge): 0

Wisdom (intuition and discipline): 0

Courage (risk-taking and bravery): 3

Charisma (social skills): 3

Luck (good or bad fortune): 2

After looking through his stats, I decided enough was enough and I didn’t really want to go around pretending I was Cody the whole game. I quit out of his save and went back to the title screen. I was back on the save select screen when I became confused. There was still one save, except the name of the character wasn’t Cody…it was mine? The play time was set to 0 minutes. I don’t know how that happened, but if it saves me the trouble of building a character and reading more tutorials, I’m happy.

To my relief, the avatar representing Cody wasn’t there. Instead, a very generic, average character stood in its place in the same room. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was some placeholder account with everything set to the default. Whatever, I can probably change stuff about him later. I decided to move my AlterEgo outside and I was greeted by a map of a large city. I chose an area of the map to explore at random and controlled my new avatar. On the busy city street, there was a cafe, restaurant, and a gym. It was too early for the cafe and restaurant to open, so I guess my only option here is the gym. I’ve never stepped foot in a gym before, but this character doesn’t have to represent me as a whole. Plus, I’d like my character to be well-rounded unlike Cody’s who would probably spend the whole time grinding here.

I went into the gym and had to perform a set of quick-time events. First, I had to do some bench presses. Then some squats. Then finally, run on a treadmill. At the end of it, my AlterEgo did a cartoony celebration and flexed his arms. A pop-up showing that my Strength, Constitution, and Dexterity went up by 1, followed up by another one saying that my Strength and Constitution will double every time I do activities like go to the gym. So it looks like Cody’s modifiers carried over after all despite everything seeming to be the default. That should’ve been the first thing I checked. I didn’t want my character to be specced to be some lumbering brute. I suppose that if I wanted to get my character’s Intelligence and Wisdom, it’d probably be like playing on Hard mode. Honestly, I was open to the challenge.

I was disappointed to find out that it’d be harder than it seemed. When my character got home in the evening, I went into one of his boxes and I was presented with an option to read. I was presented with several options, ranging from comics to full-on novels. I chose the novel since I figured it would raise my Intelligence the best. I watched my AlterEgo try to read the book, but I saw a look of confusion on his face. Eventually, he grew frustrated and threw the book back into the empty box as if he were shooting through a basketball hoop. I expected my Intelligence to stay the same, but no, it actually dropped!

“Sometimes when your AlterEgo fails to complete an activity, their stats can decrease! These stats can even go into the negative. Make sure to keep your stats high because it can become very difficult to increase your stats if they fall below a certain point.”

I couldn’t believe that my character struggled to even read. This guy was nothing like me at all! I hoped that it would be easier to raise my AlterEgo’s Intelligence because I didn’t want him to be a moron. I watched my character fall asleep and I could see into his dream. Another tutorial popped up.

“Sometimes your character will have dreams! These dreams are mostly random, but will also depend on your character’s stats. Just like other activities, you have a chance to increase your stats.”

I watched my character fight in a zombie apocalypse, but the zombies didn’t even look remotely threatening. I succeeded in the activity and my Courage went up by 2 and my Luck and Strength went up by 1. My character wiped his head of sweat as the zombies turned to dust.

The next day, I learned that my AlterEgo can go to school. That was expected, considering my character’s age, only I didn’t realize how hard it would be for him. He was sitting in a desk trying to write down notes. Eventually, like an idiot, he slammed his thick head on his desk and started snoring. This was honestly getting embarrassing. My Intelligence and Wisdom dropped yet again, not by 1, but by 2. If I didn’t do something different, my AlterEgo would basically be a clone of Cody instead of myself. After class, instead of being given an option to go and do something, my AlterEgo is approached by a group of buff men.

Quarterback: Hey new guy, you’re looking pretty strong. Judging from your Strength and Constitution, I think you’d make a good fit for the football team. Your Dexterity and Courage also seem pretty good. Wanna join, bro?

You know who else played football? Cody. I had to keep being reminded of him even when he wasn’t even around. This was my character and I didn’t care about sports, so I clicked the no option. To my surprise, my AlterEgo nodded instead. It's like this game is going out of its way to spite me at this point. Two tutorials popped up.

“If your Wisdom is too low, your AlterEgo might act on their own desires rather than your command. This means that they can sometimes act on their own or select activities that they are more interested in rather than those they are not. Raise your Wisdom or else you will have less freedom when developing your AlterEgo.”

“You have decided to join a club or organization. This will grant you a passive growth to certain stats every week.”

I watched as my AlterEgo walked away with the group of jocks. A football uniform magically appeared over his normal clothes. For joining the football team, I was granted a point in Strength, Constitution, Courage, and Charisma every week, with the usual double for Strength and Constitution.

I kept playing the game, getting frustrated at my AlterEgo’s reluctance to even try to act smart or reasonable. He frequently avoided or skipped intellectual pursuits to focus on those that made him look or feel good. It honestly just felt random whether he wanted to obey me or not. By the end of Day 7, the first week my stats were looking like this.

Strength: 30

Constitution: 28

Dexterity: 10

Intelligence: -20

Wisdom: -15

Courage: 21

Charisma: 17

Luck: 16

My Intelligence and Wisdom seemed unfixable. My AlterEgo wouldn’t even bother to try to read or pay attention at school and he consistently started to make random choices that satisfied his needs as the week progressed. I grew incredibly frustrated at this, but out of curiosity, I wanted to see if there was an end to this so I could go back and make my own character. Either way, this game was plagued with questionable design choices. It’s like the AlterEgo was already locked into a specific path. I hoped that I had accidentally skipped a tutorial or something and that I hadn’t softlocked myself out of raising certain stats. Unfortunately, my AlterEgo’s stats continued to grow and drop as I hit Day 30.

Strength: 75

Constitution: 69

Dexterity: 44

Intelligence: -66

Wisdom: -49

Courage: 54

Charisma: 37

Luck: 41

I received another tutorial message on Day 31.

“You look like you are on track to evolve into your archetype very soon! By this point, your AlterEgo’s stats will be locked in place. That will be the end of the main story, but there is still so much to enjoy afterwards!”

I figured I might as well see this through to the end. You know, see how much of an idiot my character can become. Despite my efforts, all my AlterEgo does now is work out, practice and go to games, and go to parties, outside of necessities. His Intelligence is so low that he rarely even goes to school anymore and that has caused his intelligence to plummet to the bottom. I played for even longer, eventually hitting Day 60. Turns out that this is the day I would discover my AlterEgo’s archetype.

“Congratulations on making it this far. I hope you are excited to find out your archetype, because I know I am! Remember that these changes are permanent, so there will no longer be ways to increase or decrease your stats.”

I watched my AlterEgo marched onto the stage and I was able to view my final stats and a rating of each of them. The descriptions seemed to be heavily based on my other stats, and trust me, they were very satirical, and in my case, very scathing.

Strength: 100

I’d give this an A+. I’m not even sure if you are human anymore. I’ve seen you lift things that no normal man could, not because you have to, but because you want to. You spend more time at the gym than you do at your own house and you might give The Hulk a run for his money.

Constitution: 100

You also get an A+. Your months of training at the gym have given you a perfect, chiseled body that looks like it could be made out of iron. You have a seemingly endless supply of testosterone and your stamina (in more ways than one, it seems) cannot be beaten.

Dexterity: 75

This gets a B. You are very athletic and quick on your feet despite your appearance. However, your large size means that you can be pretty clumsy and you’ve probably broken more things than you’d like to admit.

Intelligence: -100

I’ll just go along with your teachers and give you a big fat F. Are you even trying? I worry that there’s not a single thought going around in your thick skull. You care very little for anything intellectual or sophisticated, not that you even know what those words mean.

Wisdom: -90

Likewise, you also get another big fat F. Were you dropped on your head when you were a baby or did you take too many tackles to your cranium? You have incredibly poor judgment and you only make decisions that satisfy your brutish desires. In short, you often act before you think. Your lack of discipline is only matched by your lack of brain cells. As long as you’re having fun, should I really care what you do with your life?

Courage: 90

I’d give this an A, but not an A+. Because your brain moves too slow to process any risk, you often think before you act. You often find yourself in the most dangerous of situations and you often perform incredibly stupid stunts. When you’re on the field, you’re a risk taker, and at least it usually pays off. On the bright side, you always come out unscathed, so I can commend that.

Charisma: 70

I’d give this a B-. Being on the football team and being very attractive is going to place a lot of eyes on you, but they are all focused on your body because everything else you have to offer is very superficial. I wonder if you surround yourself with people who think and act the same as you do or if people keep you around to laugh at every stupid word that comes out of your mouth.

Luck: 80

Lastly, you get a B. Your luck genuinely amazes me sometimes. Despite everything, despite your lack of any intellectual thought or reasoning, you have survived long enough to make it this far in life. This alone proves that life favors some over others. If there is room for the concept of a higher power in your shrunken headspace, then they probably feel a sense of amusement at the state of you bumbling around through life with only your good looks and muscles salvaging you.

“What do you think? Are you happy with your results? Anyhow, it’s time to reveal your archetype. It’s who you are and who you will be from now on! Drumroll please… (As if it wasn’t obvious enough…) You, my friend, are…THE JOCK!”

The Jock

You are likely an athlete or bodybuilder and you likely care little for intellectual thought. You enjoy playing and watching sports and working out above anything else. You are hyper-masculine, aggressive, arrogant, and egotistical. However, you are also very muscular, tall, athletic, popular, and handsome. You feel a deep sense of camaraderie with anyone you consider your bro, which mostly includes other jocks like yourself. Your wardrobe mostly consists of tank tops, jerseys, varsity jackets, shorts, sweatpants, jockstraps, baseball caps, sneakers, and everything in between. Because of your high testosterone and your above average genitals, you are viewed as a desirable partner and often partake in sexual activities with members of the opposite sex, and sometimes even other men depending on the person and situation. Your most likely career path is as an athlete or coach, but as long as it doesn’t require too much deep thinking, you could probably find a job anywhere with your connections and attractiveness. Enjoy your new self!

I watched my AlterEgo vanish within a cloud of smoke and come out a cartoonish representation of your average stereotypical jock with blonde hair and a very lunkish, yet admittedly impressive build. He looked around, clearly disoriented, with a dull, confused look on his face before flexing with a cheesy, confident smirk on his face. The audience cheered and clapped at this ridiculous personification of a walking stereotype as if they were watching a magic show. Honestly, it was almost amusing how the description it gave for “me” couldn’t possibly be more wrong. It sounded like everything Cody was, not me. Although I guess I was playing with his settings, not by choice I will add, but I had little control over how my AlterEgo decided to live its life. I just wish I could get him off my mind for just one day. Either way, I found myself incredibly dissatisfied with my new AlterEgo, but I accidentally found out a way to make things even worse for me. I just wanted to scroll through the remaining text to get to the credits, since I have been playing for 8 hours by now, when I saw a selection that would seal my fate.

“Are you satisfied with your result? Now that you’ve discovered who you truly are, are you ready to be The Jock in the real world? WARNING: If you select Yes, your save will be deleted as a result. These changes are permanent. If you click No, you can continue playing after the credits.”

I accidentally clicked Yes as I was mashing through the text. What the hell was I thinking?! I had no idea that this would change the entire trajectory of my life. At first I felt nothing, as the screen faded to black. Then, I saw the credits start to roll, playing a remix of the joyful title screen music, and that’s when I started to feel all warm inside and I felt a painful shock come from my controller.

I felt a sudden wave of pain rush through my body as my bones started to crack and shift in my body and my muscles began to inflate like balloons. I looked at the credits and noticed that the new jock AlterEgo was doing the things he normally enjoyed doing in the background. But I couldn’t really concentrate on it as I found myself focusing down below. My legs stretched and stretched until I was around 6’4. My feet grew to a size 15 and my thick glutes and ass made me sink deeper into the couch from their weight. The fat in my stomach felt like it was melting as it left behind nothing more than a layer of sweat and a firm six pack of abs. My upper chest formed into a round set of bouncy pecs. Likewise, my biceps and triceps were almost the size of my head now and my soft hands became rough and covered in calluses from intense lifting. I felt my clothes cling tightly to my body as if they were two sizes too small, and they’d easily rip if my body grew any more. My shirt fit more like a crop top on me and my clothes were damp from pit and ass sweat.

I felt my long hair recede into my head until it formed into a shorter cut that was much easier to maintain. As it did that, my chestnut-colored locks lightened into a golden blonde. My soft, round eyes became more sharp and masculine and I could feel them turn from a chocolate brown into an icy shade of blue. My youthful face lost most of its baby fat and buried beneath it was nothing more than the chiseled edges of my jawline. The lower half of my face, which used to be soft and hairless, was now covered in a prickly lawn of stubble. Even my pasty skin turned a shade tanner from the years I spent in the sun throwing balls around. I noticed that my entire body started to sweat profusely to the point that I could smell my own musk and I became absorbed by my new-found masculine scent. I could smell the testosterone that was pumping through my veins like a drug. I felt powerful, dominant, virile, and dare I say it, good… Lastly, I found my lips contort into an obnoxious, conceited smirk. Was I…enjoying this? Judging from the growing feeling in my groin, I was led to believe that I was. And it kept growing and growing and growing…

All the while, the credits continued to play and the happy-go-lucky music felt like it was mocking my painful situation. Despite the strange pleasure I felt, it was only a distraction as my body still writhed in pain through the whole process while I changed entirely into a real life manifestation of my AlterEgo. What the hell is this game? I noticed that the jock avatar stared directly towards the screen, as if he was breaking the fourth wall, and started to walk closer and closer before vanishing from his virtual prison for good. The lively credits started to simmer down, giving the screen a more empty and disquieting feeling. That was the last thing I noticed before I felt a sharp headache ring through my head. I am usually fine playing games for a long period of time so why…Why did my roommate buy me this game anyways, bro? If he was gonna buy me any game, he should’ve gotten me the new CoD or Madden game, not this weird shit. I had to admit, it was kinda addicting. I liked being able to work out or play sports even when I’m at home. Wait, what was that? I felt like I just heard another voice in my head, both sounding similar yet different to my own. Eventually he called out directly to me.

“Hey bro, it’s me. Your AlterEgo. You know, the real you. It’s been fun, dude. Now I get to enter the real world, isn’t that sick? So here’s what’s gonna happen, dude. I am currently inside your mind and I’m making the final changes to turn you into the person you were always meant to be. That’s right dude, we are becoming one singular person in both body and mind. Don’t try to struggle or fight back. You know I’m stronger than you. There’s no going back. So, are you ready to become one with your true self?

No…I thought to myself. I wasn’t a jock. I was never a jock. I’m nothing like my AlterEgo. This is a mistake. This was Cody’s AlterEgo, not mine!

“Chill out, bro. I know you read the warning and you clicked Yes, so you obviously knew the risk. Why did you keep playing if you knew you’d become a jock regardless of the decisions you made? Because you are one deep down. Or maybe you secretly wanted to be one. Maybe you wanted to see what life was like on the other side. Maybe this Cody guy wanted you to try out this save, you know, to see what would happen... Whatever reasoning, it really doesn’t matter dude. I know you can feel me taking over your mind. You’re finding it harder to think. Soon you’ll be The Jock, me. I just wish you realized a little sooner who you really were…”

I felt my brain starting to shut off and my vision starting to become blurry as my AlterEgo took it over. I don’t even know how any of this is possible, even by today’s standards. An AI buried deep within the game was taking over my body and mind entirely, reshaping me in his image. But I continued to resist, to cling onto whatever parts of my personality I could. However, as I felt my mind sink deeper and deeper into this mental void, I felt myself slowly becoming more and more like The Jock. The archetype that was decided on, not by me, but for me. Until that’s all I was.

Everything turned black for a few seconds. I slowly regained consciousness as my brain rebooted itself. Wait…what’s a reboot? I sat and watched the credits with a dim look on my face as it finally ended. I was booted back to the title screen and saw that my save was indeed deleted. This was proof that my AlterEgo was now a part of me and that he was finally whole. I pulled out my phone wanting to learn more about this game, because, dude, it was kinda fucking weird. By scrolling, I couldn’t find much, but I did discover a post from not too long ago on some ancient forum site that was probably made in the early 2000s.

“Is The Game AlterEgo Real?”

“I’ve heard rumors about this game called AlterEgo, but I have very little information on it. It’s said to be incredibly dangerous and could lead to permanent bodily and mental changes. Throughout all of my research, I could not find any copy of the game for sale, nor any definitive proof that it’s real or any information on the company that developed it. If you have any information on this game, please let me know.”

I skimmed through the forum page, not that interested in reading what everyone had to say. Who has time for that anyways? But I did find one reply that caught my eye.

“I can confirm with certainty that AlterEgo does exist. My friend received it as a gift for Christmas and he wouldn’t stop talking about it to me. It’s like he was addicted. A week later, when I saw him next, I could barely even recognize him. His body had grown and changed greatly and he didn’t act like his usual self. I even feel like his memories might be a little distorted. I tried checking his house to find the game in order to figure out what it was all about, but I don’t think he has it anymore. He probably sold it or gave it away since he said he finished it. No matter what, he won’t tell me. If there are any other copies of the game left, please let me know.”

Woah, so this game is fucking weird, dude. Wasn’t just me. I just played it right? But I don’t feel any different. You know, I bet these nerds would pay a lot for a chance to find out about this game. Maybe they might come out as different people. I’ll put it up on eBay for a high price. One of those dweebs just has to take the bait. I wouldn’t mind a little cash though. I’d feel bad for selling Cody’s gift, but just imagine what I could get with that much money.

“Hey bro, you still in here dude?” I heard a familiar voice shout as they opened the door.

“Yo Cody, there you are. What’s up dude?” I was happy to see him. Cody was my roommate and my best friend. We were practically inseparable. When he made eye contact with me, his eyes widened. I couldn’t really blame him for being impressed with my awesome body.

“You beat that game I gave you already?” He seemed surprised, yet almost impressed.

“Yeah, it’s not usually my type, but I enjoyed it dude.”

“Do you…feel any different, bro?” Cody sounded kinda hesitant there. Had he read about the rumors too? I don’t see why he’d have to worry. None of those rumors are true anyways.

“Nah, same as I’ve always been.”

“Alright, good. I was just making sure you were down to get some food. You should be out partying and celebrating your birthday, not playing some nerdy video game. And trust me, I know all the good spots.”

“You’re right bro. I haven’t gotten enough exercise in today. Let’s go.”

“Wait, before you go, your clothes are so sweaty dude. You should change.”

“Oh shit, good idea.”

“Y-you can just wear one of my clothes. They’d probably fit you better.” He was right. As I soon realized, someone shrunk all my clothes as part of a prank.

Me and Cody went to a sports bar to watch the game. If I remember correctly, this was our favorite spot to get food, except you know, anywhere that lets me hit my macros. Since it was my birthday, he even paid for the whole meal. I don’t remember how long I’ve known him, but couldn’t ask for a better bro. On the way home, Cody grabbed a six pack of beer from the frat house and brought it to our dorm to drink the night away. I wasn’t old enough to drink, but it’s not like I never had alcohol before. And besides, today was basically my cheat day.

We got wasted while we watched TV, and we did some things that I probably wouldn’t admit to anyone but him. I couldn’t help it though. I hadn’t gotten laid all weekend and it was my birthday. Quite frankly, I deserved it. Thankfully Cody took one for the team. He said it wasn’t weird because we’ve definitely done it before and that it was our secret. I had to give him credit. His tight hole is better than most girls’. I didn’t know he was a bottom until tonight. I also didn’t remember having a dick this big, but you don’t see me complaining. After all was said and done, I passed out drunk next to him in his bed, our bodies drenched in sweat and each other’s fluids, as I enjoyed the bromance I have with my best bro. This was the best birthday ever.

The next day, I got up extra early to go for a run despite my hangover. Afterwards I went to school, but like usual, I struggled to pay attention. It was like my mind was in a constant fog. My grades are slipping and this football scholarship is the only thing keeping me from dropping out entirely. After classes, I joined Cody and the others at practice. Throughout the day, I kept getting this feeling of uh…dayjah voo? That word that means that you feel like you’ve done something before. I wasn’t exactly sure where it was coming from. I shrugged it off. I was just a jock and I didn’t need to worry about stuff like that.

When I got home, I got an offer for the game Cody gave me. You know, AlterEgo. Some nerd seriously offered $1000 for it. I didn’t actually know it was that rare. I hope he enjoys it more than I did. I’ll sure enjoy the 1000 dollars. I bet he’ll love passing it around to all his other geeky friends. I wonder what their AlterEgos might look like…

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chaotickryptonitetree · 1 year ago

Text

grant me easiness and i'll give you everything (it's only fair) | jeremy swayman

what I feel about him is alarming and frighting and yap yap yap. hope you like!

Whoever claimed to enjoy airports had clearly never been an Uber driver.

Sure; the money was significantly better than a normal ride—but the traffic? And the poor temperament? And the confusing lanes? It made you question if it was even worth the money.

But there were bills to pay, so you added tonight to the list of nights you ended up at the rideshare terminal of the airport.

You knew by now that flights usually got in on the 10s (7:10, 8:10, etc), so people would have collected their luggage and made their way to ride shares by the 35s (give or take). Glancing at the dash cam, you read 9:32. As if on cue, your phone pinged with a few alerts.

Typically, you’d choose the one that offered the most money. But it had been a long night, with a lot of rides, and had made enough to finish a bit early. So you picked the one that would put you closest to home. And it happened to be Jeremy, who wanted to end up at a brownstone around 7 minutes from your building.

And you waited.

Just for a minute or two before a knock on the back window stirred you from completely zoning out. Instinctively, you unlocked the car and a body slid into the back seat.

“Jeremy?” You confirmed, not bothering to look back.

“How do you know that?” A cheery voice forced your hand, made you make eye contact with him in the mirror. Mistake.

“Are you Jeremy or not?” You were paid to drive, not indulge lazy jokes. Still, his kind eyes didn’t waver.

“Just messin,” he looked out the window and mockingly placed a light touch to the window. Despite yourself, you tracked the movement, watching his hands (his large, large hands). Mistake. “Driver, take me home.” He sighed a wistful sigh, and even though you didn’t want to, a small smile found its way to your face. Putting on the turn signal, you merged into the departure lane and turned up the stereo.

Checking your blindspot, you pulled onto the freeway—traffic was awful so it would be a long ride despite the short mileage.

“Temperature okay?” You asked politely, following your script.

“Just right!” You could hear the smile in his voice, even though you refused to look at him again.

“Music alright?”

“My favorite!” You raised an eyebrow at his response—top 40 radio was no one’s favorite. But that was your last question that usually made riders feel heard enough to give 5 stars. Slightly relieved (as always), you settled in for the drive.

Usually you spent the time working through a problem in your head, really getting into the whys and hows of something that was bothering you. One of your friends was being distant, so you started there. She had started this behavior about a month ago, so that could mean that—

“I flew in from Alaska,” that cheery voice interrupted your internal monologue completely.

“That’s nice,” your reply was non-committal. You didn’t usually talk to riders that much. Didn’t plan on making it a habit.

“Yup!” He popped the p sound. “I’m from there, and I was visiting my family. It was awesome—I really miss them when I’m here for a long time.”

“Nice.” You were out of practice making small talk with a new person (to put it lightly). He just nodded—the only indication being the sound of fabric moving around his neck as he did so.

“So, where are you from?” He leaned forward in his seat, as if genuinely interested—as if knowing where this stranger grew up was a seriously important part of his night.

“I don’t have to talk to riders just because,” you cringed at how mean you sounded. He didn’t even deflate a little, just leaned back and laughed a slightly weird laugh.

“Fair enough,” his tone made you wonder if he was always this happy, this unphased.

And then the music filled the space as much as your stale air freshener did—even if the air was tinged with a bit of guilt on your part.

“I can feel you looking at me,” your eyes darted to him again in the mirror. Brown eyes forgiving and kind and very, very cute.

“Not tryna hide it.” It could’ve been taken as flirting, but you had the impression that he was just like this with everyone. Still, it warmed your cheeks just a little bit. “I’ve just never had such a pretty Uber driver,” and then a moment later, “well, a pretty one that’s my age, I mean.”

You laughed, despite yourself. “Pining after older women are ya?” He smiled easily, and it definitely was for him—easy.

“Look at this face and tell me I’m not a cougar's dream,” he laughed loudly. You didn’t look back for safety reasons (and convinced yourself that was the only reason). He leaned forward again. “I like it though,” his words felt like an admission, even if he didn’t lower his voice. Everything about him just felt—genuine? In a way that made every breath feel like a secret. “Makes me feel like I have a hot girlfriend who likes me enough to pick me up at the airport.”

You scoffed. If he wanted a hot girlfriend, it definitely wouldn’t be hard—not with his easy charm and pretty face. “I’m only here because I’m being paid.” You hesitated. “And there’s no way you don’t have someone who likes you enough to brave the traffic.”

You could sense his delight through your headrest. “Oh yeah I do,” he looked out the window again, “I have the best friends in the entire world. They were just busy tonight.” He sighed as if the idea of his friends was as good as having them in the seat next to him. It was quiet for a moment. “But no girlfriend, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“I wasn’t asking,” your tone was blunt, but you couldn’t help but smile. He laughed his weird, goofy laugh.

“Call me a romantic,” he addressed you by name—something you typically didn’t like from patrons in your backseat—but it felt different with him. “But I want that—someone who wants to be the first person to see you when you get back, who can’t even wait to kiss you even if it’s in front of a whole terminal.”

“Sounds like you’ve been watching too many rom coms,” but that suddenly felt unkind to such a gentle man, so then a moment later, “I hope you find that.”

“I will,” he seemed absolutely sure. “Oh shoot,” he raised his fists to the sky mockingly. “My phone died. Curses!”

“I have a charger,” you looked around for the cord while still keeping an eye on the road. He stayed quiet for a moment, considering.

“No, I have an android,” he quickly put his phone in his front pocket, eyes squinting with trouble. Trouble that made you think that he definitely didn’t have an android. “Oh wait! I have an idea!” He completely over-sold his facial expressions, making you question where he was going with this little scheme.

“And what would that be?” your tone was dry, eyes still on the road as you took the exit off the freeway, only a few minutes from his destination.

“So I can give you your rightfully earned tip!” He reasoned, “you can give me your phone number so I can send you money once I get my phone charged.” You could feel his hopeful gaze on you, like his plan was the most logical course of action ever spoken.

Logistically, it made no sense. You could tip an Uber days after your ride. “And what—you’ll just remember my number until then?” For some reason that was the first question you asked.

He nodded, serious as you’d seen him. “Of course,” he said incredulously, “I remember important stuff.”

And it didn’t make any sense. And you could’ve said no. And this was probably against some sort of employer code. And he was definitely this charming with everyone. But he looked so endearing and hopeful and there was something very good about him. Something right.

So you rattled off your number, and he mouthed each number after you said it. And you believed him that he would remember it.

And you believed him as he opened the door to leave, wishing you a good night. And you believed him as he waved from the top step. And as he opened the door and turned around for one more look, mouthing goodbye.

Despite yourself, you believed him.

…

Your bed was heaven after a long stint in the car. Practically asleep before your head hit the covers, a notification sounded from your phone.

A message from an unrecognized number was the last thing you saw before sleep.

From: unknown

Sent $50

And then a moment later, after you saved his contact.

From: Jeremy

Any interest in meeting me at Dunkin on Tuesday morning?

You went to sleep smiling. He remembered.

…

You agreed to meet him early—you typically liked to start driving before 11 and he had morning skate.

The sun had just risen as you walked to a Dunkin about halfway between you and him, bundled up in a puffer jacket and a toque. The bell jingled above the door as you entered, blowing warm air into your hands. It was freezing out.

You didn’t even have time to glance around and look for him before a tall, broad body in a black coat walked up to you and held out his arms for a hug. And then you weren’t freezing anymore. Not even a little bit.

He released you with a smile, linking your arms together and pulling you into line. “What do you usually get?” You asked, convincing yourself that you certainly were not leaning into his side. Definitely not.

He peered down at you, tucked into his side, nose red from the cold. “Whatever looks good,” he admitted, “usually the thing with the most cream and sugar.”

You laughed—even if you didn’t really know him, the idea that he didn’t have an order, that he just let himself enjoy whatever he wanted (even if it had a ton of sugar), that seemed very him.

“I’ll get that too,” you definitely snuggled into his side more, but maybe it was so you didn’t have to face his genuine smile so head on. Maybe?

And so he ordered for you both, but not before complimenting the teenage cashier’s pride pin and asking what his favorite donut was.

“Dunno,” the kid had braces and posture that seemed to shrink in on itself, and was clearly not used to anything beyond what can I get for you, “sprinkle looks pretty good today.”

“Then two of those too,” he put the spare change (and a five) in the glass tip jar. “Thanks brother,” he put out his knuckles for a fist bump. The kid tapped his fist lightly to Jeremy’s, completely won over.

Like a puppy, he quickly found something else to entertain himself with while you waited. “We almost have matching jackets!” He gestured to his black north face and your navy one. You pulled a face—how could he find such delight in everything?

“I guess?” You pinched your face together. He didn’t mind.

“Very couple-y of us,” he put his hands up at the look you shot him. “I had to say it,” He shook his head like it was obvious. And it was so cute you didn’t give him a hard time about it.

“Thanks for paying,” you directed the subject elsewhere, “you didn’t have to do that.” He shrugged, eyes fixed on your drinks as the barista (are they called baristas at Dunkin??) set down two identically light and sweet drinks.

“My pleasure,” he grabbed the bag with two sprinkle donuts inside.

“I’ll send you my share,” you made to grab your phone from your pocket. His hand over yours stilled the movement entirely, warmth emanating from his palm.

“You got it next time,” he shrugged—like obviously there would be a next time. And you believed him, hand now interlaced with his.

“I know it’s bad for me,” he groaned as he took a sip, “but it’s actually the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” A completely innocent line, but it felt dirty as he said it. Or maybe you were just losing it over how his thumb moved over yours.

“Oh,” you responded quietly, taking a sip of yours. Total sugar bomb. “Well you’ll work it off anyways in practice I’m sure,” you fumbled over your words just a little bit. He seemed amused. “Like, looking at you, I’d never guess you have a sweet tooth,” you said, even though there was absolutely no reason to keep talking. He titled his head in delight. “Because you look totally in shape—you look, great. Yeah.” A true example of vocal mastery was on display tonight.

He took a bite of donut, his white teeth a sight so intimate it made you blush. He hummed while chewing, nodding. “Oh yeah? I’m not sure why you mean…should we keep talking about how hot I look?” He joked before pulling a very embarrassed you into his side and out into the chilly air. It didn’t feel as cold with his hand around yours though.

You laughed an embarrassed laugh. “Easy, you big dope, I was trying to be nice.” He laughed into your toque, head on top of yours.

“I know, I know.” And then he went into talking about how he wasn’t a fan of Dunkin before moving to New England and now he was addicted. And you just listened, toasty from humiliation and content as he walked you home, hand covering yours.

…

You offered to pick him up from practice later in the week (he had asked you to come to a home game, but you weren’t quite ready for that yet). He was right on time, waving an animated wave as he walked out the door with a few teammates.

You waved back (a bit more timid in the presence of his friends), and turned to que up your next song. He knocked lightly on the window, and you rolled it down. He was bent over, face in the window as he glanced toward the backseat.

“Want to meet my friends?” He asked politely, clearly excited.

You hesitated, which made him continue. “No pressure at all. If you don’t want to, I can hop in the backseat and we can pretend you’re my Uber driver again,” he smiled a grin that was so genuinely happy it made you less nervous. You turned off the engine.

“No way,” you unbuckled your seatbelt. “I wanna meet ‘em.” You opened the door and shut it softly behind you, wrapping your arms around yourself instinctively. He pumped his fist.

“Let’s go!” He seemed overjoyed. It was quite possibly the sweetest reaction to such a nothing event. You rolled your eyes, but let him pull you in front of him, large hands rested on your shoulders, steering you to face his two teammates.

He introduced you to them both (they were sweet, but there was something on their face that made you unsure if they were making fun of you or jeremy–or both–or no one). But listening to them banter back and forth while you stood pressed to the front of him made you realize that they just joked around like that.

Jeremy was usually the punchline–but he didn’t mind. He was easy to laugh, easier to smile, and made a point of pulling you impossibly closer to him. If his friends noticed, they didn’t say anything.

But then the fact that they didn’t say anything made you wonder just how many people he had introduced to his friends. Maybe they were having a non-reaction because they were so used to it? You stiffened slightly under his hands.

And he must’ve felt it, because he placed a feather-light kiss to your hair–which did pull a reaction from his boys.

“If you’re around on new year’s, we’re throwing something and you are obviously invited,” one of them nodded towards you, eyes a little wide.

“Obviously?” You questioned, but felt far more comfortable than a moment ago. The taller one laughed, eyes flickering to Jeremy’s briefly.

“Obviously,” he confirmed. “You think this is our first time hearing about you?” He shook his head, clapping the shorter one on the back. “Sway here wouldn’t shut up about you. If you didn’t respond to his text he was going to make us call every Uber in Boston until one of us got you as a driver.”

You hit his chest as you turned around. “You goof,” you meant to say–but the words died on your tongue when your eyes met his–so full of genuine enjoyment and content that it warmed you from the inside out. You turned toward them again, waving goodbye.

“I’ll see you on new year’s then.”

“Nice to meet you,” they parroted, smirking at Jeremy. “We’ll see ya sway.” He waved and let you pull him into the passenger seat.

“I like your friends,” you rubbed your hands together and blew on them. He smiled a radiant smile.

“You’ll love the rest of the guys,” he pulled your free hand into his lap, both palms wrapped around it, warming you right up. You drove the rest of the way home with one hand so he could keep a grip on you. He gave you a play-by-play of practice (which drills he did best on, what made him laugh the most, what he wanted to focus on for the next game), only coming up for air once.

“I really like you,” he said earnestly, as matter-of-factly as when he spoke about drills. It made you shake your head.

“Obviously I like you too,” the words felt good to be out–like you didn’t realize how true they were until you said them aloud.

He brought your hand to his lips and pressed a chaste kiss to your knuckles. “Obviously?” You could feel his smile on the back of your hand.

“It's, like, impossible not to.” You pulled in front of his building, putting the car in park. Meaning to pull your hand back from him–a little embarrassed–but didn’t even make it over the console before he crushed you in a hug over the center console. The steering wheel dug into your side, nose crushed into his chest, hair static-y all over his puffer. But you couldn’t bring yourself to back out of it–arms rubbing circles against the back of his coat.

You had no idea how much time had passed when he pulled back, grabbed his bag from the trunk, and walked up to the front door. It was probably the longest he had gone without talking around you. But you didn’t mind. You liked him when he talked, when he didn’t, when he smiled, when he breathed.

You smiled all the way home.

…

You agreed to walk to the new year’s eve party together. It was just far enough away for you to prepare to meet more of the people from his world and hear about his last couple road games. Just hearing him talk made your nerves melt away.

He insisted on meeting on your doorstep, however, even though it added 10 minutes to his walk. He texted when he was on his way.

From: J

Be there in a few!

From: you

You need my address?

From: J

Course not.

And then.

I remember important stuff.

You went in for a hug as you opened the door–a new part of your routine.

“Hey,” your greeting was muffled into his puffer. His navy?? Puffer. One identical to your own. You thumbed the material and glanced up at him. “Nice coat?” You raised your eyebrows.

He laughed loudly, tipping his head back. “I wanted to match.” The way he said it made it feel obvious–tone like a noncommittal shrug. Like why wouldn’t he want to match?

The ease of the gesture was lovely. He was lovely. “Well then,” you linked your arm with his, setting off down the stairs and onto the sidewalk, “it is an honor to match with you tonight.”

He let a grin brighten his face. “You smell really good,” he breathed into your hair. “Like you always do. And I like the glitter you have–” He ghosted a thumb over your brow bone, “here.”

And the loveliness haunted you the entire walk over, conversation easy and light. He was so open, so kind, in a way that eased openness and kindness from you as well.

So the night was much better than you had expected. It felt natural to meet his friends, his teammates, their wives, their kids. It didn’t feel like being thrust into a brand new world. It just felt like natural–like getting another piece of Jeremy was a privilege.

And you didn’t feel out of place with how enamored you were with him–everyone here clearly was. He was the heartbeat of this group of people–and you felt lucky to watch him light up the room. And a little part of you felt proud that you were here with him.

The one who everyone wanted to be around–he wanted to be here with you.

“You’re too nice for him,” another new face laughed as he clapped Jeremy on the shoulder, looking down at you.

“Too nice?” You glanced at the palm resting over your stomach. Possibly the most gentle, kind touch you had experienced. How could anyone be too nice for that? “For him?” Your voice raised with confusion.

The young guy in front of you raised his eyebrows at the man behind you. “He didn’t tell you?” His smile was all trouble. “Our boy Sway likes to be a little roughed up,” he laughed at your blush, hidden by you turning around to gape at Jeremy. To wait for a rebuttal.

But it never came. He just laughed good-naturedly and hugged you into his chest. “Hey now, don’t scare her away!” He looked down at you, squeezed tight against his chest. “Lucky to have her here at all.” His smile was just for you.

And so you smiled and let yourself half forget about that comment. Met some more people. Drank some more wine. Smiled a lot.

But you couldn’t forget it entirely.

Some time later, he beckoned you over to where he sat on the couch. You finished up chatting with some of the women and made your way to him.

“Hey,” you stood in between his legs before he pulled you down to sit on one of his thighs with a thud. You felt him sigh into your hair as you leaned back so your head rested on his shoulder, hands reaching around the play with his fingers. He was solid and warm.

“Hey,” if you had to put money on it–you’d bet he was smiling. “Thanks for being a champ about this–they can be a lot.” You traced a nail over the outline of his hand. “But they’re important to me, so it makes me happy that they get to meet you.”

As intimate as a secret, spoken lowly in your ear. As secure as a fact, warming your chest.

“I like them,” you thought for a moment. “Even if they think I’m too nice.”

He rolled his eyes. “They’re just giving you a hard time. It’s a long story.”

You raised your eyebrows. “You can tell me if you want.” You could feel his chest rise and fall under your back.

“When I first signed, I showed up to practice all beat up once. Bruises, all that nonsense.” His eyes shone as he retold the story–like the emotions were just as fresh as they had been. “Told everyone I walked into a doorway–or something stupid like that. In the locker room later, everyone saw the marks this girl had left all over me.” He indicated scratch marks over where you lay on his chest. “All on my back and my neck and stuff. Never heard the end of it–how doors are really fighting back now and all that.” You just listened. “So yeah, they give me a hard time about it. But it’s no big deal–I didn’t want them to scare you or anything. If you’re not into that, don’t worry.”

He ducked his head into the crook of your shoulder, kissing behind your ear. You shivered, trying not to wiggle too much over his lap. Tilting your head towards him, you let your voice drop so only he could hear. “I’m into that.” His eyes went wide. “And I’m into you, so I can still be nice.”

He gulped audibly, making you smirk. “Like, I can be nice and tell you that you’re so good.” His face was as serious as you’d seen him. “Makes me wonder if you’d be so good for me.”

He nodded before he knew what he was nodding at, grip tight around you. “I would be.” His voice was clipped. “I’d be so good for you.”

You nodded back, chest on fire. You believed him.

You let your cheek rest against his sweater, eyes peering up at him–slightly flushed from the party and eyes a little tired. It had to be close to midnight.

As if on cue, the countdown began from the tv. Every voice in the room chanted along…10, 9, 8…but you almost didn’t hear them. Too busy looking at Jeremy. 7, 6, 5. You turned so your legs swung off the couch, sideways in his lap.

“I’ve never had a New Year’s kiss,” he whispered, holding you upright against him. “Like a real one. Not just a friend or something.” 4, 3. You pulled him so close you could see the shine of his lip from his drink, feel the sweat on the back of his neck from his sweater.

2. 1. “Glad to be your first or something,” you grinned into the kiss, teeth knocking against his. He laughed a breathy laugh into your mouth, free hand palming the back of your head. His chest rose and fell next to yours, making you pull back.

“I’m so happy it’s you,” he admitted–probably the most embarrassed you’d seen him. You ran your hands through his hair, settling against his chest so he could put his chin atop your head.

You believed him.

...

happy new year! Love ya

#nhl fic #nhl imagines #jeremy swayman #bruins #boston bruins #david pastrnak #brandon carlo #charlie mcavoy #matt poitras

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stars-and-the-min · 9 months ago

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☆ the wrong way to hard launch (9) | OP81

summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au

pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc

a/n reunions galore!

masterlist | last part | part 9 | next part

INSTAGRAM

chrisyamada

liked by eb_jonno and 482,492 others

chrisyamada was on stage w/ the aussies again 🎸 tagged: emptybottles_official

lukaszhang don't come for my job man ↳ chrisyamada @lukaszhang i can't handle lina for extended periods of time dw about your job security

ceciliapham THEY DID THIS FOR ME AND ME ONLY 😭😭😭

piastri_lina now if i didn't know any better, i'd think this was a soft-launch... ↳ piastri_lina @piastri_lina know ur place christopher yamada

oscarpiastri

liked by selinabui and 213,284 others

oscarpiastri Race week recharge 🔋

pi4str1 convinced that if oscar was to open an oscar.jpg account it would just be all lina

selinabui ur so hot do u have a gf ↳ oscarpiastri @ selinabui yeah sorry 🫤

piastri_lina boyfie looking boyfie, wifey looking wifey, what is a girl to do 😭😭😭

logansargeant ask her if we can talk again ↳ selinabui @ logansargeant U TOOK ME SERIOUSLY??? IS THIS WHY I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM U???

TWITTER

↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h wait i asked a lina question OH MY GOD PLS PLS PLS CHOOSE THE LINA QUESTION ↳ Williams Racing @ WilliamsRacing · 2h Find out when the episode drops 😉 ↳ jess @OPIXSTRI · 1h OH MY GOD I'M GONNA DIE ↳ Williams Racing @ WilliamsRacing · 1h Don't die just yet

YOUTUBE

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selinabui Shenzhen, China

liked by oscarpiastri and 264,938 others

selinabui my own kinda home race? tagged: eb_jonno

eb_jonno *OUR* home town performance ↳ selinabui @eb_jonno my bad bro why did u think i tagged u

oscarpiastri How do you still suck at bowling? ↳ selinabui @ oscarpiastri wdym i won ↳ cameliazzz @ selinabui no you didn't???

pi4str1 same top as the one in oscar's post? ↳ marie_h.sb @pi4str1 pls they think they're so subtle 😭

linasgirl4 SINCE WHEN SELINA. SINCE WHENNNNN ↳ linasgirl4 @linasgirl4 i'm going fucking feral i need to know how long they've been together for my mental health ↳ emptybottlos @linasgirl4 calm the fuck down it's not that serious

MESSAGES

from the phone of selina bui

TWITTER

↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 1d dude are u kidding me? ↳ kay ♡ @ blackcatluna · 4h she still got that :] energy 🥹

camilina gfs fr @ drummergf · 21h I CAN'T BREATHE I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAW JONATHAN SU AND SELINA BUI LIVE IN THE FLESH AT THE SHENZHEN FENDI POP-UP ↳ camilina gfs fr @ drummergf · 21h i'm not alive i have ascended to a higher plane

president linami @ linaminami · 16h try not to say mother challenge failed. she looks so good wtf

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emptybottlesbar

liked by cameliazzz and 332,974 others

emptybottlesbar Jonny and Lina at the Shenzhen FENDI pop-up store. Did you manage to catch them? tagged: emptybottles_official, selinabui and eb_jonno

selinabui wtf are we pokemon or smth??

eb_jonno was i not photogenic enough, i'll work on it ↳ emptybottlesbar @eb_jonno You were very handsome 💚 ↳ eb_jonno @emptybottlesbar well that's a very nice way of saying i look bad in photos

2cami4lina I DID CATCH THEM AND IT WAS SPECTACULAR

TWITTER

lina bui x2 grammy winner @urdaisea · 1h oh ttpd, oh how 2021 lina coded it you are ↳ lina bui x2 grammy winner @urdaisea · 1h i need a lina x i can do it with a broken heart edit STAT

emme @flowersforcami · 42m oomf said i can fix him (no really i can) is super lina in her tommy era coded and i can't unhear it now

↳ kay ♡ @ blackcatluna · 1h @urdaisea baby girl this is for you 😭 ↳ lina bui x2 grammy winner @urdaisea · 44m HOW ARE THEY SO QUICK OH MY GOD IT'S HEARTBREAKING

oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 33m it's only been like a day since it dropped but i've already been blessed with a so high school oscalina edit the lord is good 🙏 ↳ jackpot ☆ @slayridgo · 30m i wanna be on ur fyp bc i've gotten two 'you look like taylor swift' edits of olivia and lina and it's been depressing

piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h lina's stories perfectly encapsulates my april 19 experience, she's the chairman of the swiftie f1 girlie department ↳ piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h side note she used one of those oscar gifs from f2 and it's so endearing

INSTAGRAM

selinabui just posted to their story

trans: brother yu (she uses the fish 'yu' and not zhou guanyu's actual 'yu', again, it's a pun) is awesome!

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit @fionaschicken @namgification @cherry-piee @urfavsgf

#f1 #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x oc #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri smau #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 smau #f1 fic #f1 smau #f1 imagine #f1 social media au

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lostyesterday · 7 months ago

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My top ten favorite B7 scenes

B’Elanna/Seven is my current favorite Star Trek ship, so I wanted to make a list of my personal favorite scenes featuring the two of them in Voyager. These scenes aren’t necessarily good (although I do think some of them are), and they’re not necessarily the scenes that provide the best “evidence” for B7 as a ship (which isn’t something I care about all that much to be honest). These are just the scenes that I personally enjoyed and have thought about the most.

10. Someone to Watch Over Me

This episode is terrible, but given how much I’ve thought about this particular scene, I couldn’t not include it. This is the Voyager scene that most clearly demonstrates how obsessed Seven is with B’Elanna and particularly with her romantic relationships. To me personally, this screams oblivious gay crush taking the form of jealous obsession. Obviously, B’Elanna is right and Seven is stepping way out of line here. This is probably the worst thing Seven ever did to B’Elanna and she’s so justified in being mad about it.

9. Survival Instinct

I really enjoy this scene because it’s an example of both B’Elanna and Seven trying to change the adversarial nature of their relationship. B’Elanna is trying to help Seven here even though she has difficulty with her. Seven immediately regrets her defensive response to B’Elanna’s attempted helpfulness. I think it’s interesting to see how the two of them have fallen into a pattern, responding defensively to each other because they’re used to their dynamic being adversarial, when they both theoretically have the capacity to understand each other better than most other people understand either of them.

8. Infinite Regress

The infamous cheek bite scene. Is this scene good? No, probably not. Has it lived in my head rent free since I originally saw it? Yes, absolutely. Technically, you could call this the only intentionally sexually coded Seven/B’Elanna scene in the show. Mostly, the thing I can’t stop thinking about is the two of them joking about it afterward. B’Elanna jokingly asking if this qualifies as their second date… I will think about that line forever.

7. The Voyager Conspiracy

I love everything about this. Seven immediately calling B’Elanna as soon as she thinks she’s found a problem with the ship’s systems regardless of how early it is in the morning. The tone of B’Elanna’s response implying this probably isn’t the first time this has happened. B’Elanna actually investigating the problem even though she’s rightfully irritated at Seven for being so annoying. I love them.

6. Course: Oblivion

It’s so, so easy to interpret this scene as Seven being jealous of Tom’s relationship with B’Elanna. Me when the person I have a crush on just got married: Monogamy is stupid, and it would make way more sense and be better if everyone (you) would have sex with anyone they want to, whenever (me, right now).

5. Human Error

Ignoring my issues with this episode, it’s so interesting how one of Seven’s major attempts to become “more human” is to try to connect to B’Elanna in this way. I think she chose B’Elanna here because she’s someone Seven genuinely wants to connect with at this point in the series, but she still struggles with how to make that connection. Also, I cannot stop thinking about Seven thinking in detail about how B’Elanna does her hair. Given the rest of the scene, I think it makes sense to say that she didn’t choose this question/compliment/terrible flirtation randomly and has genuinely just admired B’Elanna’s hair a lot. Which sure is something. And of course I love B’Elanna’s confusion here. She can tell Seven’s trying really hard to be nice, which is so not like Seven that she can hardly believe it.

4. Message in a Bottle

I love how these two scenes represent both the adversarial tension between B’Elanna and Seven, and the potential ways they could relate to and understand each other with time. B’Elanna is clearly deeply frustrated with Seven, and yet she still tries to explain to Seven why people (not just B’Elanna) are reacting negatively to her. And B’Elanna can obviously relate to being perceived by others as rude, which makes her statement that she doesn’t expect Seven to change overnight, with the subtext that she understands deeply how difficult this situation is for Seven too, really fascinating. Seven initially appearing to ignore B’Elanna and then later saying thank you to her compliment is also great. Also, B’Elanna’s reaction to Seven shocking that guy is so fun.

3. Extreme Risk

This is a short interaction, but it’s so interesting. Seven initially tries to engage in their ordinary adversarial back and forth, but when B’Elanna doesn’t respond in the typical way, immediately asks if something is wrong. I love that Seven is the first person in the episode to notice that there’s something wrong with B’Elanna. It’s so interesting that Seven seems almost disturbed by the lack of any hostility in B’Elanna��s responses and by B’Elanna immediately putting Seven in charge of something she was going to do. I think that, in a way, Seven has grown comfortable with her adversarial dynamic with B’Elanna because it’s familiar. Maybe B’Elanna has grown comfortable with it to, to a certain extent, and her lack of willingness to engage in the typical verbal sparring of their relationship in this episode comes from the same place as her lack of desire to participate in the normal routines of her other relationships. I guess I’m suggesting here that maybe Seven and B’Elanna are both more important to each other than the show explicitly portrays.

2. Hope and Fear

The iconic “we’ll be outcasts together” scene. This is probably the single scene that best illustrates the parallels between Seven and B’Elanna – how both of them have been treated like outcasts and deep down expect to continue to be outcasts forever. How both of them feel deeply ambivalent about belonging – desiring it desperately and yet pushing away from it because they believe they can never have it. Also, B’Elanna’s defensive excuse that she was “joking” two seconds after she realizes she was accidentally way too vulnerable is so good.

1. Imperfection

Thinking about this scene makes me want to scream incoherently, but I’ll try to summarize my main thoughts concisely and analytically. This is probably the scene where B’Elanna and Seven genuinely connect and relate to each other most strongly. B’Elanna understands better than anyone else in this episode what Seven needs, and Seven trusts B’Elanna of all people to ask these questions to, to be vulnerable with in this way. B’Elanna saying that Seven’s made an impact on every member of the crew is… a lot. B’Elanna truly listening to Seven here and understanding what it is that’s bothering her and saying the exact right thing in response. The whole framing of this scene with the close-up shots on faces, the softness in B’Elanna’s voice. Fuck.

#star trek voy #b'elanna x seven #lane posts #lane's character and relationship meta

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liopleurodean · 3 months ago

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Counter question: What exactly could the Jedi have done that falls under "done more for clone rights"? They're in the middle of fighting a massive war, spread thin as it is. Sad fact is lobbying for policy change, even for important stuff like this, is pretty low on the priority list when Dooku and his ilk are pillaging systems left and right. If Yoda and Mace and the others have choose between discussing military strategy and pushing for legislation in the Senate (which isn't even their job to do), 9 times out of 10 their priority is the former. Not to mention by the time the war had simmered down to a point where they could start advocating for clone rights, Order 66 was literally a phone call away.

hey, thanks for the question! and you're absolutely right, there wasn't a lot the Jedi could do in the realm of politics. in my post I mention the Jedi struggled with "limitations of the war and their contracts with the Senate and Kaminoans" which definitely affected what they were able to do for the clones. however, I was talking less about political value and more about public opinion -- by the end of the war, most civilians resented or even hated the clones and what they represents. while there was some backlash against Jedi, as well, for the most part the Jedi generals were seen as heroes and paraded across the Holonet. the Jedi could have done more using their influence of public opinion toward the clones, especially those more commonly in the spotlight like Obi-Wan and Anakin (both of whom are considered to have the best treatment towards their troops in the first place).

another realm of their influence is the ranking system. take, for instance, Rex and Tarkin: during the Citadel mission both were Captains, but Tarkin automatically held a higher rank by virtue of being nat-born (something Anakin inadvertently encouraged in his encounters with the man). while the Jedi Commanders were better about recognizing their inexperience in battle and letting the clone commanders take the lead, the Generals could have done more to crack down on clone racism (speciesism? clonism?) within the Republic Navy. not only is that their duty as Generals and therefore the top of the command chain regarding their men, but also the Jedi are the legal owners of the clones and are responsible then for their treatment.

which does come to my last point, if we want to talk politically. the Jedi own the clones. legally. (we're not even going to touch the slavery part of this, that's a problem for another day.) the Kaminoans talk big about "their product", but in the end the Jedi (and the Senate) are paying customers and therefore what happens to the clones outside of Tipoca City is none of their concern. yes, there is an existing contract that the Jedi have to honor, but considering that none of the Jedi knew it existed and the Jedi who initiated it is dead, there should have been a reevaluation of the contract terms and what kind of influence Kamino could have. a big part of the issue is that Senator Burtoni, a representative of a Republic system, would speak out to the Senate about clone issues when the clones no longer belonged to Kamino. the Jedi should have done more to crack down on that kind of behavior and reestablish their control over clone treatment. Shaak-Ti obviously did some work in that department during her time on Kamino, but it's truly depressing how much slid by her.

Anyway, I'd love to hear more thoughts on this! this was mostly just me rambling off the top of my head, so if someone has a more clear and concise point that they want to share, I'd love to hear it. I totally agree that the Jedi were cornered into an awful position and were limited in choices, but I do still believe that more could have been done for their men.

#ashla regina astrum #ashla speaks #star wars #the clone wars #jedi #clones #thanks again for the ask anon!#im always down to talk abt star wars

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aspoonofsugar · 2 years ago

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you wrote such a beautiful rwby analysis but unfortunately I think you put more thought into the plot than the entire writers room

Hi!

Thank you, I am happy you found my analysis beautiful!

That said, I am sorry, but I disagree with your statement. It is fine if you dislike the series and even if you criticize it, but as for me, I think the writing is rather strong.

Here are some thoughts, which aren't really directed at you, but rather are born by me seeing a tendency going around where it is somehow "cool" to outloud state RWBY is badly written. I even saw people like... "apologizing" because they enjoy the series. Newsflash...RWBY is good.

RWBY is a series with a writing that goes from decent to very good depending on the moment. I would give it from 7 to 8.5 or even 9 in some scenes. More importantly, it is a story the writers are clearly enjoying writing, as for now. This is why I like watching it. It is genuine, upfront in what it wants to say and it takes risks. Ironically, a series with limited resources shows much more freedom in execution than many other stories, which are economically backed up.

I would also add people keep talking about good writing, but never really elaborate on it... And like, trust me, I do think there is good writing and bad writing. The problem is that people just take examples of "well written series" and decide a series written differently must be bad. This isn't really the case.

First of all, let's focus only on a specific type of story, which is the kind most modern movies, books and series are. This type of story is built on 3 (4) factors:

Plot

Characters

Themes

(Worldbuilding)

I would say the first 3 are more important usually, but there are some stories where the worldbuilding is so strong it becomes its own selling point.

Now, a good story is usually strong in all these departments. The perfect story is top notch in all 3 (4). That is because a good plot usually lets you develop the characters better, which in turns helps exploring the theme.

However, here comes the amazing truth... even the most incredible stories. Even the masterpieces loved by everybody... even them... end up choosing only 1 or 2 of these aspects and sacrifice a little bit of the 3rd (and 4th) one.

Naoki Urasawa's Monster? Its focus is themes. He chooses to go all out on this department, which is why the story is so powerful and resonates so much with people. Still, to do so, he chooses to sacrifice some parts of the plot to the point... some mysteries are not really solved. Some people may be annoyed by it, but I would not call it a flaw. It is a choice. Leaving some things open enriches the themes.

Death Note? If the story has to choose between characters, themes and plot, it goes for plot. This is why despite having so many well liked characters, it is difficult to think of outstanding character arcs in it. The same goes for the themes, which are only touched superficially. This is why btw Death Note is not a fave of mine, really.

Now obviously, many examples can be done and we could discuss forever on some because there is always always always a subjective component. What I am trying to say is... there are different ways to write a story. Not all people would like the same. Luckily, we have tons of stories.

Back to RWBY. I would say RWBY shines when it comes to themes. Characters and plot are good and interesting, but what keeps the story together, despite it playing so much with genre is that it has a very strong thematic core. You can't invent it or fake it btw. See, Death Note's author tries to do it in later works (Platinum End cough cough), but fails. At the same time, there is another department RWBY is top notch and that is symbolism. RWBY has a very rich symbolic system. Again... surely there are coincidences, but like this is a little bit too much...imho.

Now, does it mean, the writers came up with all the patterns I and others find? Probably not, but here is the thing... writing has an unconscious component. If you go earnestly at it, you are bound to unconsciously create patterns. A good writer is able to recognize them (either consciously or unconciously) and to capitalize on them. So far, I think CRWBY has capitalized on the patterns they created. I also think it is clear they are very good at researching and at playing with different sources by going deep into them. Again, you can't come up with the Ever After if you have not read and even studied Alice in Wonderland. It is just impossible. You would end up with a shallow and uninteresting copy cat. The Ever After isn't that because it is used to explore themes, characters and lore in an interesting way. Hence... ladies and gentlemen... it is a fruit of... good writing.

But really, since people are not commenting on it... I would like to point out that in 5 episodes of less than 20 minutes, they have managed to introduce a whole world, with its own lore, set of characters and main story (Alyx's) and to tie it to the protagonists' predicament in a way that hits really hard thematically and psychologically... To do that you need exceptionally thight writing... it is not that simple to do...

Anyway, have a nice day anon and consider watching something else. Thanks God the world is full of stories!

#rwby #asksfullofsugar #anonymous #rwby volume 9 #rwby spoilers #btw obviously the story can still go downhill #this is possible for all stories #but so far i trust the writers #if that changes i'll let you know #i will add that messing up a story doesn't mean some parts of it aren't well written #see tokyo ghoul has still some of my favourite moments ever #but i still think it went downhill

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mayhem-ensues · 2 years ago

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My Top 10 Sulemio moments

It's been a whole week now since our girls' story ended but the brain rot remains, so I'm listing out my favourite Sulemio moments from the show.

List is going under the read more because it is long and has many images.

Number 10 is this small conversation from Episode 9 between Suletta and Shaddiq. The reason I love this so much is that it’s the first time that Suletta really takes pride in the fact that she’s Miorine’s groom. A lot of people are of the belief that Suletta first starts really developing romantic feelings for Miorine after Episode 7, and I think this scene really highlights that change in Suletta’s feelings.

The other noteworthy thing here is that it really illustrates the difference between Suletta and most of the other people in Miorine’s life which is that she actually trusts Miorine to make her own decisions.

Number 9 is the late-night conversation between Suletta and Miorine in Episode 4. I love this scene not just because it’s the first time where they really start to learn more about each other, but also because it does set up the parts of their character that would cause problems for them later. Suletta is proud to carry the expectations of Mercury because she loves the idea that she can be useful to them, whereas Miorine thinks it’s an unfair burden to carry. It’s a nice set-up for the later drama to come when these two aspects of their personalities clash.

And this is something that I really love about Suletta and Miorine’s relationship. When there is friction between them, it always comes from a place that is true to the characters rather than the drama coming from forced “misunderstandings.”

Also, there’s only one bed in Miorine’s living area and Suletta certainly wasn’t leaving to go back to whether she slept before she joined up with Earth House that late at night. They 100% shared that bed.

Speaking of friction between the two characters, here’s Number 8 on the list, the Greenhouse conversation from Episode 16.

I find Miorine’s desperation in this scene to be really heartbreaking, she’s looking for any sign, no matter how small, that Suletta might go against Prospera’s wishes if the circumstances were right, but Suletta’s still in too deep at this point. The fact that Miorine is visibly hurt by the conversation here says so much, considering how far she’s previously gone to maintain her composure. Even during the big emotional moment in Episode 11, she doesn’t want Suletta to see her cry, but here she genuinely breaks emotionally and can’t hold it in at all when Suletta admits that she would kill for her mother.

Number 7 is Suletta reaching Permet Score 5 and it’s a moment I love for more or less the same reason I love the previous scene, any scene where a normally stoic character really shows how much they care is an incredible scene in my opinion.

And of course, everything leading up that is excellent too. Miorine choosing to trust Suletta’s decision to pilot the Calibarn despite the very real dangers, even pushing to activate higher levels of Permet when the others were hesitating is a perfect display of Miorine’s faith in Suletta, and a perfect turnaround from her earlier, misguided attempt to protect Suletta from the Gundam’s Curse.

At Number 6 we have the moment that this show left me with permanent emotional scars.

Miorine forcing herself to abandon Suletta for “her own good” was always going to be heartbreaking, but they really twisted the knife by having Suletta fantasize about their perfect wedding while Miorine’s fingers hovered over the trigger. And then on top of all that, they just had to go and play the damn Happy Birthday song AND have Miorine tossing back cool-san! Like, they really stuck the boot in there.

Like, when I was re-watching the show, I have to admit I found it genuinely difficult to re-watch this scene again and that’s how you know it was really well done. Suletta begging for another chance while her entire life crumbles around her haunts me.

Show of hands, how many people started watching the show because of this exact scene? Cause seeing people talk about this moment was definitely what got me to watch the first episode.

Don’t think I have to elaborate too much on how good this scene is or what it means for their relationship, but I will say that Suletta’s reaction when she finds out she’s engaged is probably still my favourite Suletta face.

Also, Miorine completely sidestepping the potential “but we’re both girls tho?” drama by talking about how common gay marriage is was perfection.

More shows should have that amount of courage.

Number 4 is the happy ending. After everything these two went through over the course of the show and also some of the dumb stuff that was said about their relationship by real people, seeing them end the show married, in love and living their best lives was unbelievably cathartic.

Also, extra bonus points for having Suletta end the show disabled and not having it treated as an awful tragedy that mars the happy ending or having it be something that she can just overcome with sufficient willpower.

While I would have loved to have seen the wedding on-screen, the fact that we ended the show with married sapphic women in as big a franchise as Gundam is already pretty incredible.

Wedding OVA when tho?

At Number 3 we have Suletta and Miorine using healthy communication for the first time!

As I said earlier, one of the things I love about the relationship between Suletta and Miorine is that any drama between them is true to their characters, Suletta is insecure in her relationships and needs to feel “needed” to feel safety in those relationships and Miorine is cold and closed off emotionally since her upbringing makes it hard for her to trust. As such both of them have trouble communicating exactly how they feel.

That being said, in order to be truly great, conflict and drama needs to be followed up with by a satisfying resolution. And in terms of providing a satisfying resolution to all that drama, they absolutely knocked it out of the park in this scene. Miorine explaining to Suletta how much her life has been changed for the better since they met, actively working to accommodate Suletta’s desire to feel useful and asking to be together forever. Like everything here was exactly what it needed to be.

Also, as well-done as the emotions were here, it would be remiss of me not to mention the goofy looney tunes style chase scene that proceeded it was also brilliant.

The number 2 spot on the list goes to the formation of Gund-Arm inc.

When we meet Miorine she is very upfront that her one and only goal is to escape the Benerit Group and go to Earth. Although she passes up on the chance to escape from Earth to save Suletta in Episode 2, she’s still pretty clear about what her ultimate goal is. Although it goes unsaid for several episodes after this, this is the moment that Miorine decides that keeping Suletta safe is more important than making it to Earth by willingly tying herself to a Benerit Group company just to keep Suletta and Aerial safe. Even bowing before her father and begging for his help, probably the last thing that Miorine ever wanted to do, in order to make sure her plan worked. If this scene doesn’t illustrate just how much Miorine was in love with Suletta even at this early stage of the story, I don’t know what will.

In addition to the scene just being completely incredible in every way, the other reason it ends up so high on this list is because this scene marks a pretty clear turning point in Suletta’s feelings for Miorine. I think most people now, generally agree that this scene is probably where Suletta starts falling for Miorine for real, and after rewatching the show I think that idea comes across very clearly. From this point onward, Suletta clearly takes a lot more pride in her title of Groom, she’s a lot more openly affectionate towards Miorine, and also a lot more concerned about how Miorine perceives their relationship.

So yeah, awesome scene, huge turning point in their relationship, Number 2 spot.

And finally, we reach my number one favourite Sulemio scene, their reunion in Episode 22.

Just take everything that I said about the scene from Episode 11 and multiply it by 10. Suletta reappearing in Miorine’s darkest hour to remind her to keep moving forward was everything I needed after a rough couple of episodes for Miorine.

Also, the whole scene is just a perfect show of how Suletta developed over the course of the show. Suletta starts the show shy, insecure in her relationships, not particularly confident in her words, and following orders rather than working toward her own goals.

Here, Suletta is able to speak with complete confidence about how Miorine changed her life, about the things that she’s done wrong and the things she wants do better, and about her desires for the future.

Of all the scenes in this show, this is the one that had me tearing up the most, and for that, it absolutely deserves the number 1 spot on my list.

Also, that handholding. Hoo boy, that is the most emotionally intimate handholding I’ve seen in my life.

So yeah, that's my list of my favourite Sulemio moments. If your favourite scene wasn't one of the ones that made my list, then tell me about what made you love that scene so much because I love this show, and I love these characters and I will read anything about them.

#sulemio #suletta mercury #miorine rembran #gundam witch from mercury #g witch

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msunitedstatesjames · 8 days ago

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Ranking the RPG style games I played in 2024:

Just a note, I'm ranking based mostly on my enjoyment, and this ranking is not meant to be an actual statement of their respective quality. I enjoyed every single one of these games regardless of their ranking, and I played through their complete stories and most or all side quests. Also, as you'll see, this was just a stellar year of RPG gaming for me, so really the worst I can say about any of these games is that they're just good.

9. Greedfall

I made the big mistake of playing this right after finishing Baldur's Gate 3. No RPG was going to compare well to that. Greedfall certainly had an interesting world and story, and I liked the diplomatic aspects of it. Greedfall does attempt to have an interesting companion system by letting you grow your relationship with companions and choose one to romance, though it's really quite a shallow relationship you have even compared to other games from around the same time or earlier. The thing that really bothered me most about the game is the repetition. Environments are almost identical everywhere you go, and the combat gets repetitive after a while too. However, if I remember, this game was made by a fairly small studio with limited resources, so it's actually an impressive achievement in that sense.

8. Mass Effect 1

Don't kill me, internet, but ME1 didn't impress me all that much. I think the best thing about it is the thing that really held the series together from game to game: the characters. The companions are mostly great, even in ME1. It introduces some of the most iconic characters of the series like Garrus (my beloved), Wrex, and Liara. The romances always felt a little lacking and awkward to me in this game, but maybe I was just bitter that you couldn't romance Garrus yet. The combat and leveling up system were still not perfected, and exploring the planets often felt kind of clunky and grindy. But overall, it introduced us to one of the most iconic video game protagonists of modern gaming, and it set the base for the rest of the series, so I can't complain too much.

7. Octopath Traveler II

So, I went into this one with no knowledge of the first one. Now, I fully intend to go back and play it. This game had a lot going for it. You get to know the characters so well through their stories, and somehow the huge variety of tones from story to story made it more engaging instead of jarring. Going from really dark and depressing tales to lighthearted and hopeful ones was actually a lot of fun. I loved the way you got to see where each character was on the map and pick which order to meet them in. The art and visuals were gorgeous, the bosses were awesome, the storytelling was effective, and the different abilities of the characters were fun to use. My only real complaint is that the combat did start to feel repetitive after so many hours of gameplay, often fighting similar enemies. Overall, it was one of my favorite games this year, even if it didn't make it to the top of my RPG list.

6. Sea of Stars

I would die for Garl, that's all that needs to be said, right? I technically played over half of this one in 2023. I put it on pause when BG3 came out and only came back to it months later. I'm glad I did. This was really just a beautiful game. The scenery was beautiful, the attacks and ultimates were beautiful, the character models were beautiful. The story was fun in a classic JRPG style. There were certainly dark moments, but it was overall a hopeful game, which I personally appreciate, and there were several times the humor really knocked it out of the park. The characters certainly could have had more depth, but in this style game I didn't genuinely feel like that was a problem. Like many games in this genre, the combat did become repetitive at times. But this game made me do one thing almost no game does. After finishing the main quest it motivated me to get back in there and finish up the few dangling loose ends that I left behind. And boy was it worth it.

5. Mass Effect 3

Even though I didn't play Mass Effect until this year, I've been a gamer all my life, and I remember the outrage around ME3 when it came out. And some of that I understand. The ending left something to be desired, there were plot holes, many things just felt too convienient, and, of course, Kai Leng. Still, in my opinion, this series has always been built on the back of it's characters, and few if any games have let you build such long lasting and meaningful relationships with the companions. I guess I might have been angry if I romanced someone other than Garrus, but getting to build on that relationship (and the friendships) from game to game was amazing. And I can't discount the fact that ME3 contains perhaps the greatest piece of DLC of all time, The Citadel DLC. So in the end, maybe it all balances out.

4. Dragon Age: The Veilguard

I don't care what anybody says, I loved this game. I genuinely liked all the companions, which (unpopular opinion) is more than I can say for some of the previous Dragon Age games. I found the combat really fun, but I always think playing as a mage is a good time. The Spellblade specialization was a great time, and I liked that mages in this game have the option to get up close and personal, which combats one of the biggest issues with mage gameplay in many RPG games. I didn't think the villains were anything to write home about, but the same could be said for Inquisition. I thought the game made interesting additions to the lore of the world as well. I've seen some complaints about voice acting which is just baffling to me because I thought the acting was stellar. And of course, my beloved Emmrich is going right up there with my favorite Dragon Age companions. He was such a well acted, animated, and written character, and he was a great, fresh take on necromancers. It was interesting playing this in the same year as the ME games because honestly it often played like it was an ME game, but I love them, so no complaints about that here.

3. Mass Effect 2

Most people in the RPG community seem to agree that this is an iconic game. I loved the character focused missions, though at first it took some adjusting. I had to realize that the characters WERE much of the plot. This was perhaps the first game I've played where you get to keep more than just 1 or 2 characters from game to game, and it was probably the only game I'd played where you got to carry over a romantic interest from game to game. Playing the ME games right in a row really allowed me to properly experience the improvements in everything from combat to traversal to character arcs. In any other year, this probably could have been my top game.

2. Disco Elysium

I slept on this game for far too long. I'd heard how weird it was, and while I like a little weird I thought it might be too much for me. But it was on sale and I was still in the post BG3 funk. When I started it, I still didn't think I would like it. But I quickly got invested in the mystery and in the fabulous characters of Harry and Kim, and it was over all too soon. I absolutely loved the attribute/skills system in this game. It genuinely felt like some of the best I've seen, and not only was it a cool and story relevant system, but it legitimately affected the way you played the game and reacted to different situations. The voice acting was equally amazing. The art style worked perfectly with the tone and the setting. It was uncanny and absurd, it was timely and serious, it was heartwarming, it was tense, it was devastating, it did everything so well. Even the music was perfect. My only complaint is that I stupidly played this on Switch, and crashing was a huge issue for me throughout the game. Don't repeat my mistake unless you have no other option.

1.Baldur's Gate 3

Little needs to be said about what makes BG3 great. Sometimes less is more. The character interactions and relationships are among the best I've ever experienced, the acting and animations were top notch, the sheer variety of role playing choices and endings were absolutely the best I've experienced, and this is the rare game that I plan on playing more than once.

Honorable Mentions (Games that are only sort of RPGs)

Stray Gods

If you look at the official title of this game, it has "Roleplaying" right in there. Still, I would say this is RPG-lite. You do make decisions that affect your ending, you do interact with characters, and there are even romance options. On the other hand, you don't really have choices in regards to customization or building your protagonist, there's no skill/level up system that I remember, and there really isn't any fredom of exploration or side quests, so in many ways it didn't feel like a full RPG. More than anything it feels like a visual novel (which is not a complaint). It was a great game. I loved the protagonist. The songs were fun, and getting to change the tone and content of the music was an awesome concept.

Thronebreaker: The Witcher Tales

I loved this game. I don't know why I hear so little about it. Much like the other Witcher games, it forces you to make really difficult choices over and over again, often with no real right answer. Meve was a fantastic protagonist, and most of her companions were memorable and interesting. Your choices do ultimately affect the ending and often have basic resource related consequences, but while the actual combat always felt life and death it pretty much never had real consequences. You're often told, "don't fight these guys, we don't have the troops," but you always win and rarely lose troops anyway. Still, it was a great game, and I played for over 60 hours. This one doesn't fully fit into the RPG category for me just because it's primarily a deck builder, but it does have a lot of other RPG traits. It has world exploration, fun companions, and you can level up your army through building your deck. If you haven't played it and you're a Witcher fan, take this as your cue to remedy that.

#baldurs gate 3 #Mass effect #disco elysium #Mass effect 2 #Mass effect 3 #dragon age the veilguard #Greedfall #Stray gods #thronebreaker #sea of stars #octopath traveler 2 #video games #Rpgs #Bioware

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karnalesbian · 11 days ago

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that status effects post got me thinking about how one of my personal marks for when a game's design specifically catches my attention is when they actually put a little effort into how they implement status effects (i.e. thought is clearly put into player vs enemy balance; standard fights vs boss fights; ease of application/removal vs power of effect)

I will now proceed to yap about this (part 1)

off the top of my head some things that immediately annoy me

all bosses are, as a rule, de facto immune to all status effects just because they're bosses (whether legit immunity or, arguably worse, 'actually we'll let you apply them but at 1% effectiveness'). YOU CAN LITERALLY ALWAYS DO BETTER THAN THIS LAZY COPOUT

powerful status effect that very clearly exists exclusively to hinder the player (either affects stats/abilities that only matter to the player OR nominally affects enemies but at a ludicrously high opportunity cost. these also NEVER work on bosses even if they arent status immune) BUT THEY STILL PUT IT INTO YOUR SKILLSET FOR SOME REASON. it's always a mid-lategame unlock and you will literally never be in a position where it makes sense to use. in 9/10 choose-your-party RPGs the poor fucking Designated Status Effect Character that learns this shit will have a permanent seat on the bench. popular candidates for this one are Petrify/Stop/Confuse equivalents and there will also be one normal encounter enemy that exclusively spams this move and exists purely to piss you off

(some or all) status effects are debilitating to the player, with limited removal options, AND OMNIPRESENT FROM THE BEGINNING. if e.g. poison is going to do 25% of my HP a turn and cost 1/2 to 2/3 of my second party member's early game MP bar to cure every time, then i don't want every fucking early game fight to have some shithead rat or snake enemy that comes in packs of 3 and spams some 'poison bite' equivalent every other turn. I'll shit in your fucking dishwasher what do you think this is accomplishing

IN GENERAL status effects should actually be relevant factors to consider in a fight. meaning you should err on the side of making them more impactful rather than annoyances, but conversely they shouldn't be fucking shoehorned into every other normal encounter or be a side effect of every single move. when a party member gets hit by a status it should immediately become a fairly high priority to cleanse them (unless it's a status that has no impact on that member), which by extension means that probably should not be happening to your entire party every turn/every couple of seconds. you can play around with that by adjusting the ease/cost of cleansing as well though (single vs aoe, proximity limitations, cost of item/ability, cast/recovery duration)

the ubiquitous 'Nullify X status' accessories are included, but it's in a game where status effects are actually just a complete joke and you would never realistically give up any other accessory effect to protect against some absolutely useless shit. have a realistic idea of your own design paradigm please. this one gets A BIT of a pass if the game includes an enemy (typically a one-time midgame boss encounter, it gets tedious as fuck if it's a normal encounter or part of the endgame) that has special gimmicks related to a given status that actually make it worth shielding against.

unfortunately those status gimmick fights almost always have their own corresponding problem in that the specific implementation of the nullify X status item is usually the sole determinant of how the fight goes:

single character rpg: boss is a joke if the gimmick is nullified -> why bother having a checklist boss. boss is hard despite shutting down the gimmick -> why did we bother with the gimmick when it could have been a solid fight as-is without making the player feel boxed in with their build options

multi character rpg: is the status null accessory one of a kind? multiple but limited copies? multiple freely available copies? if every party member can get a copy -> see single character rpg section. if a single character can get a copy -> think very carefully: 'am i absolutely sure i want this to be the fight that every single player complains about for the next fifteen years whenever my game is brought up?'.

to me the only generally forgivable implementation is multiple but not unlimited copies -> e.g. 2/4 party members will get to be gimmick immune and the other 2 will have to cry about it. figure out how you want to go about it within your range of options. even with these there's frequently a broadly 'correct' solution but it's already above and beyond the other options and there's sometimes room for creativity. single copy CAN work but frequently devolves into an absolute slog of healer mass cleansing every turn -> chip damage with the remaining party member's turn -> refill healer's mp periodically -> repeat for an hour

I have more complaining to do later and perhaps even some praising but if I save this as a draft I will not revisit it for 12 years at least so... right

#who knows if ill ever finish putting down the other thoughts #game design

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nowoyas · 3 months ago

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vespertine: evening blooms prologue - nishinoya yuu/cat hybrid!reader

Next - M.list - Ao3

A/N: she's here! housekeeping: right now, I hope to update every other wednesday until I've caught a rhythm with this fic, so we're hoping next update will be 10/9. it may come a week sooner, but shouldn't be any later than that--the next chapter is already written, and the ultimate goal is for this fic to update weekly once I've got a more clear plan set in place for it.

Summary: Yuu feels like he's at a dead-end in his life, despite his many accomplishments ranging from a middle school volleyball award to losing his virginity in high school, the proudest of these being befriending the mother cat in the alleyway beside his apartment. She rewards his friendship by introducing him to the dying hybrid behind the dumpsters.

Warnings: blanket series warnings (see vespertine masterlist for details), implied alcohol abuse, light mentions of blood/hospitals

Words: ~3000

prologue: alley cats

Nishinoya Yuu is on the precipice of a mental break, and no one seems to have noticed.

He's not sure anyone would believe him if he bothered to bring it up. He's Yuu, the bright, unrelenting baby of the Nishinoya family and the single best brother his sisters have ever had. (Unrelated, the only brother they've ever had.) He's that Nishinoya, talents ranging from a middle school "best libero" award (the highlight of his life so far, even though he doesn't really play anymore) to finding the wrong time to be at the wrong place and get blamed for shit he had nothing to do with, all because of his kickass hair and inability to keep to himself. He's Yuta, second most popular host at Nakamoto's and soon to be the first, if he keeps up the good work.

It's funny, really, how easy hosting is. He spent all of high school growing used to a reception anywhere from "total disinterest" to "actively making fun of him" if he dared trying to pursue a girl while being only 159 centimeters tall, and here he is, four nights a week, leaning in with bright eyes and nodding along while some beautiful married woman (Misaki, her name is Misaki) tells him he's so cute over a glass of wine. Yeah, he comes back to the apartment most nights totally exhausted, sleeps until noon, is basically forced to drink for work, and has no idea where he's going in life, but what fun is there in knowing that, anyway?

So he leans in. He smiles. When Misaki or one of his other clients comes in for him, he compliments her hair and asks is that a new dress? and flashes a smile, and on his days off, he does what he can to keep the apartment clean enough that Mei doesn't ask questions and forget the taste of alcohol in his mouth.

"Yuta-kun?" Misaki tilts her head with a pout. "What are you thinking about?"

He blinks. Laughs it off. "Sorry, Misaki-chan. You just look so lovely tonight that I keep getting distracted. I'm really lucky that you choose me, you know?"

"Oh, please," she says, a bubbly laugh leaving her lips. "There isn't anyone else for me. You know, the other day, my husband…"

She launches right into another story. He frowns appropriately, files away the details without really processing them, tops off her glass for her when it starts getting low. He's grown skilled at making the mechanical look fluid.

When he tunes back in, she's talking about that damned hybrid, the one her husband brought home and fell in love with. According to her, the single source of every problem in her life: if not for her, her husband would still be interested in her, but instead, he focuses all his attention on a pretty young thing just because she's got doe eyes and a twitchy tail.

"I mean, we have kids! What, am I supposed to tell them their father's sleeping with a deergirl instead of their mother?" she snaps, then sighs. "I'm sorry. You probably don't want to hear about this."

"No, no, tell me. Is Nara still making trouble?"¹

"You wouldn't believe it." She pauses, takes a dramatic sip of her wine glass. "I'll need another bottle tonight if I'm going to get into the stunt she pulled last night. Any recommendations?"

He flashes another toothy smile, reaches for the menu. "Let's take a look."

The night drags on that way—Misaki for two hours, then another regular, then a new customer who blushes and smiles too sweetly to have ever done anything like this before, who looks at him with hearts in her eyes when she names him her preferred host. It's a victory that feels too, too empty, nearly forgotten by the time he's unlocking the door to his apartment and kicking off his shoes, muttering a quiet tadaima! into the room.

No response comes, not that he expected it. Mei left for another business trip this morning, so it's just him here, and she'd be asleep this late, anyway. No one to talk to when he strips off his suit jacket, or tease him for throwing it on the floor, only to immediately pick it back up and gingerly hang it on the coat rack.

He flicks on the lights in the living room, collapses onto the couch. Mei left a note on the whiteboard, enough words to make his head spin with the last vestiges of alcohol in his system. He'd done good tonight, he thinks, managed to get away with only drinking about two glasses' worth of whatever shit his clients had ordered, managed to come home only a little buzzed.

His alcohol tolerance is basically fucked, he thinks as he stares at the note and doesn't comprehend it.

Right. Focus.

Her handwriting, smooth and font-perfect, fills the board.

Yuu! I had to jet out for another trip! I'll be in Hawaii with a client until 9/22. I wasn't able to take the trash down before I left and trash day's tomorrow, so please run that down so it doesn't start to smell! I'll be 19 hours behind you, but just think of me as 5 hours ahead! Please let Mom + the girls know where I'm at and that I'll bring back souvenirs! I'll call when I've touched down. There's leftovers in the fridge and if you're not gonna cook the chicken tomorrow, you should stick it in the freezer. Be good, okay?

PS. The neighbor in 802 was looking for you. I think he wants to hang out next time you're off work!

He groans. Lets his head drop against the back of the couch.

He'll get to it, all of it, in a minute, once he gets changed out of his work clothes and heats up something to snack on. Gone is his button-down, the silver necklace, the too-nice pants and belt. Before he steps into the shower, his reflection catches his eye, and his stomach turns.

He never recognizes himself after work. The stupid one-day hair dye shit he uses to cover his blond streak is convenient—it lets him walk around on his days off with a certain plausible deniability. Misaki or one of his other clients might recognize his face on its own, but given how much they drink with him, it's doubtful. Still, he covers the blond with black on work nights, runs some product through to make it all… swoopy and dreamy, or whatever, instead of the trademark spikes-and-tuft he wears off the clock. It works well, it washes out easy, and it looks fucking nothing like him.

Nothing like him at all.

"The commission's good," he says out loud. "It's good."

He drops the stupid fucking wristwatch a client gave him into the handmade jewelry dish Mei gave him for his "birthday" earlier this year.² The last work thing weighing him down. It doesn't prevent him from feeling the disconnect when he meets his reflection's eyes.

The commission is good. Good enough that it shouldn't matter how long he has to stand under the running water to wash off the shift, the feeling of the alcohol, the cling of twenty women's perfume on his skin, his clothes, in his hair. It shouldn't matter how his nice, expensive, gift-from-Aya watch feels like a cuff on his wrist by the end of the night, or that he can't skip wearing it even one night for risk of losing a client. It's good.

He doesn't need to worry about affording repairs or maintenance for his bike, can go toe-to-toe with Mei for paying the bills, even with her cushy jetsetting consultant job. His clients bring him gifts and spend money just to spend time with him, and none of them are objectionable-looking in the least. Not that he's ever seen a girl he didn't think was at least a little pretty.

He steps out of the shower, slings a loose towel around his waist. His reflection looks a little better now—still clearly exhausted, but at least he can recognize Yuu looking back at him. He finds basketball shorts, a hoodie. His keys and wallet. Throws a burrito in the microwave, throws his towel on top of the hamper.

While his burrito simultaneously over- and under- cooks, ensuring an ideal 3 AM trash-and-cat-run eating experience, he finds a can of cat food in the pantry and dumps it on a plate. He made good money on commission tonight; Mama Kitty can have some of the top-shelf wet food.

One final pat of his pockets as he kicks into some sandals: wallet so he can open the side door after hours, phone, keys, wrapped burrito. Trash bags in one hand, plate of food for Mama Kitty in the other.

She doesn't greet him right away when he makes it outside. Probably, she's tending the kittens and will be with him soon. He sets down the plate on the stoop, flings the trash bag into the dumpster, takes a seat, and waits. She'll probably come out around the time he burns the ever-loving fuck out of his tongue on his burrito.

It's a balmy night. Quiet, for the city. Quieter in contrast to Nakamura's, to obligate conversation, laughter, serenading women with enough money to afford it, or in contrast still to the roar of his motorcycle carrying him back to the apartment. The trains don't run when he gets off work. More small talk at the end of a shift is the last thing he needs. It's too dark in the alleyway to see whether there's clouds in the peek of sky overhead, but there's definitely the sting of rain amid the smell of garbage. It's just bright enough to see Mama Kitty when she hops up on the stoop beside him with a hoarse nyaugh.

He laughs every time he hears it. She meows like a lifelong smoker, like she pulls eighty hour work weeks at the factory and sleeps ten hours a week, tops. Noya takes another bite of his burrito as she watches him expectantly. "Me too, Mama Kitty, me too. Kittens doing okay?"

Mama Kitty doesn't reply. She's tired, too, at three in the morning, but something feels different tonight; it's in the way she doesn't turn to scarf down the food she's brought, the way she stares him down. Ungrateful, he thinks with a quirk of his lips as she eyes his burrito instead.

"You don't want this, sweetheart. It's somehow the hottest thing I've ever eaten and still frozen in the middle. That food you've got there? It's some fancy American brand. Kaede hand-picked it for you. Said it's good for new mothers. Helps them produce enough milk and rebuild their energy so they can take care of the babies. This cat food will change your life, Mama Kitty. You just gotta eat it instead of my dinner."

Her tail flicks at the air, agitated as she lets out another death rattle of a meow. She's insistent, tail flicking even faster.

He raises a challenging eyebrow. "You're not getting my burrito."

Mama Kitty's eyes focus. Her shoulders drop. Sensing that she's about to pounce, he closes his hand over his burrito protectively, letting his keys rest on his lap.

She lunges, instead, for those keys, and, protective as he was of his shitty 100 yen burrito, he doesn't move quick enough to catch her. He lets out a shout, springing to his feet and narrowly snatching his phone out of the air as it slips out of his pocket with the movement.

"Oi, Mama Kitty! If you don't like the new brand, just say so!" he shouts after her as he chases her further down the alley.

He's never really gone this far down. The one time he tried, Mama Kitty had hissed at him something monstrous, sounding close to a horror movie monster and very visibly prepared to make him find out if he dared fuck around any further. That had been after she had her kittens, so he'd always just assumed that she didn't want him near them. No problem, he just wouldn't go past the dumpsters.

This time, she doesn't hiss, doesn't spit; doesn't turn to him with ears pinned and ratty fur fluffed and perfectly replicate the noise the zombies from one of his shooters make. She drops the keys a few meters ahead of the end of the alley, comes to sit just in front of a lump of something he doesn't recognize. He scarfs down the last of his burrito, proud of how easily he manages to fit half a burrito down his throat without choking, and shoves the trash in his hoodie pocket so he can scoop his keys up.

A noise gives him pause.

It's not one of Mama Kitty's—it's too high and not nearly crunchy enough. It doesn't quite sound like a kitten, either—he's caught the kittens' meows once or twice and they're more like squeaky toys, though they've been growing a bit sweeter lately.

No, this was more like a whimper, like a human whimper, and his blood is tinging cold as he looks for the source.

He stuffs his keys in his pocket with the burrito wrapper. It's dark back here, dark enough that Mama Kitty's all but disappeared except for the white in her tabby coat and the reflection of a distant streetlight off her eyes, so he fumbles for his phone's flashlight.

A chorus of the squeaky meows he'd expected to hear raises in protest as the light shines on them. Later, he'll try to remember back and be sure there was four kittens to report to Kaede, but for now, he's focused on the lump they're curled up with, on not dropping his phone as he takes in the sight.

There's the peek of skin, a tangle of hair. What's not visible, as he tries to make sense of what he's half-convinced is a dead body in the alleyway beside his apartment, is draped in hospital gown blue.

Human. A kid, maybe a teenager.

Then: large ears flicking, almost like Mama Kitty's. One ear torn, though where Mama Kitty's left point is jagged from one fight or another, the lump's ear is torn in a way that looks clean, purposeful. Like someone held it down and just snipped the point off.

Another whimper, or maybe a groan. A tail flicks up, wraps over the human-shaped lump's side.

Not human. Hybrid.

"H-hey," Noya says, clearing his throat. It's coated with cheese—fucking burrito—and that's what he'll tell anyone who might ask why he stammers, why his tone comes out sounding so much like fear when that's not a thing he feels. "Are you—are you alright?"

A flick of the ears greets him, but no other movement. He looks to Mama Kitty, who watches him cautiously. No hostility yet. He crouches, reaches for the hybrid, and when his pinkie brushes one of the kittens, he hears a half-hearted hiss from behind.

Message received.

He swallows thickly. "Alright. Help the hybrid, don't touch the babies. Loud and clear, Mama Kitty."

Nyeeaughh.

A soft huff. He shakes the hybrid's shoulder gently—it doesn't react, except for its tail to flick and drape over his forearm. It shivers under his hand, too violently for the weather.

"Hey, c'mon. You gotta wake up."

No response.

He sets the phone aside, tries his best to sit the hybrid upright without too much force or jostling. The good news is that it's light, concerningly light. Clearly a cat hybrid, which, sure, he thinks he remembers they're supposed to be smaller than your average human, but he'd swear that he's slung around toddlers that were heavier. Makes it easy to lift, even as he wonders whether any hybrid is supposed to be this light.

It's awake, he thinks. It looks at him with bleary eyes, pupils constricting harshly when he raises up the flashlight again. "Hey. Can you hear me?"

No response, except to track his lips with its eyes. It occurs to him, belatedly, that some hybrids never learn to talk, and this one might be one of them.

"Can you, like, blink twice at me if you understand me?"

Two blinks.

He exhales a sigh of relief. "Okay. Alright. I don't know what happened to you, but I'm here to help, okay?"

The hybrid's eyes flick to Mama Kitty, and for a split second, Noya swears she nods back.

The hybrid nods in reply.

"Are you hurt? Can you show me where you're hurt?"

It glances down. Noya follows the eyes to the pricks of red beginning to seep into and stain the hospital blue covering its abdomen, and… well, fuck.

He's gonna have to call Kaede for this one.

Footnotes

1. Nara is a deer hybrid, "adopted" from the Nara prefecture itself. Misaki's husband is not very creative with names.

2. Noya, mostly on Mei's insistence, tells clients his birthday is April 10th, six months before his actual birthday. He maintains it half for privacy (if a client tracks him down they're likely to cause issues for Mei, too) and half because it's sort of nice to have a half-year birthday.

Tags: @deeplightgarden @idonthaveanameideayet @dusstory

#my fics #cat hybrid au #nishinoya yuu/reader #nishinoya yuu x reader #yuu nishinoya/reader #yuu nishinoya x reader #noya x reader #noya/reader

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tiffyfoundsomething · 1 month ago

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A for real review.

I did get that budget book and it's nice enough for my needs.

This is about the mini washer that came in the same order, though.

They were on sale for $20, but I think I got a cheap knockoff of what's actually pictured.

Affiliate link: https://amzn.to/4giL9v9

And it is not inexpensive, it's cheap. There's a difference.

There's lots of flash, the hoses are super thin and fragile, they also came already dented...

The only way to stop the water from draining out is to clip the drain hose up. The clip, the bracket, and the hose are all super cheap and flimsy. Some of the reviewers said their drain hose developed holes at the bottom rendering the whole device useless because there's no way to make it hold water at that point.

I didn't even use the feed hose, I just filled it from the top and ran the whole thing IN the sink on a grate so it could drain without getting the power plug wet.

I had the same issue many had with the drying/spin basket in that it would just pop right off the bracket in the bottom, so I wrung the items out by hand instead of using the spin basket.

I also had to finish the rinse by hand because I had used a little too much soap. I think I put 3 or 4 drops, or a 1/4tsp of soap and needed less.

It sounds horrible and I expect the little motor to burn out pretty quickly.

It would rock less if it were on a flat, stable surface and does come with suction cup feet to help it stay level. They weren't engaged because I was using it on that grate.

The biggest, scariest problem is the plug. The prongs are too long so it can't actually sit flush in the outlet, and it's not grounded, which is concerning with something that uses water.

Anyway, I'd bought this to try using with doll clothes because I thrift stuff all the time and it takes me a while to wash the clothes. The washer is a little too violent for doll clothes because it did cause the Velcro-like strips to open and then they snagged themselves and other garments in the washer. I did think ahead and tried it with clothes that were already in poor condition so I didn't ruin anything nice. Less worn closure tape might stay closed better.

I do like that I can leave the top open and look in while it washes, but that's only because there are no sensors of any type in the machine. There's only go and not go on the button panel on the front, and you can choose 1, 5, or 10 minutes of go.

It... Works. It works ok. It did work to agitate the items I washed (some doll clothes and a couple cleaning cloths), used less water than I usually use to hand wash doll clothes (I usually soak them in a big bin for a while), and, I mean... It works???

I think it would be fine for washing like, one day of underwear or some baby clothes maybe. It does say not to try towels or sheets because it's very small. It does NOT hold 9 liters. It holds maybe 6 but I wouldn't put more than a half to a gallon in there.

It's cheap AF and will likely stop working sooner rather than later. The motor struggled. It's best use would be for soaking things with the benefit of having a drain hose.

#doll care #affiliate links #laundry #household #product review

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sunburnacoustic · 10 days ago

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Muse wow Wembley

18 June 2007 - Emily Wood for BBC Devon

Teignmouth indie band Muse played to a sell-out audience at the new Wembley Stadium on 16 June 2007 - and as our reviewer Emily Wood reports, they put on a spectacular show.

Muse put on a spectacular show

Arms aloft, listening to rocking guitars, with ticker tape falling and a statue of Bobby Moore outside, you can only be in one place - watching Devon band Muse in Wembley Stadium.

With the hype leading up to the occasion - Muse being the first band to sell out the new Wembley - I was a bit worried about being let down by the show, but both the band and the venue easily exceeded all expectations.

Entering the stadium by appearing on a podium in the middle of the crowd to fireworks, glitter, smoke and classical music, the Teignmouth trio left you with no doubt that they were there to put on a show of immense proportions. And they did.

With giant screens behind and to the side of the stage, showing pre-recorded videos and shots of the band; lights fitted in see-through satellites dishes; balls that changed colour in the seats behind the stage; sometimes you didn't know where to look.

But above all that was the music. The performance was spectacular but also had substance, thanks to the impressive back catalogue of songs that Muse have to choose from.

Starting off with the epic Knights of Cydonia, the last track from their latest album, they then played other recent hits including Supermassive Black Hole, before going back to the first song from their first album, Sunburn.

Other huge tracks followed, such as Plug In Baby and Newborn, proving that Muse aren't just a show band, they write high-quality songs as well.

Storm clouds over Wembley for the Muse gig

That being said, lead singer Matt Bellamy is undoubtedly a showman, ably supported by bassist Chris Wolstenholme and drummer Dominic Howard.

Together they put on a performance that not only confirmed their title of one of the best live British bands of the moment, but it will also have to be one of my top three gigs of all time!

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Muse kick off at new Wembley

By Laura Joint, BBC Devon

Devon trio Muse are to play the most prestigious shows of their careers, when they appear at the new Wembley Stadium in the summer of 2007.

Muse at Wembley (Action Images Ltd)

Devon rockers Muse have been booked to play two concerts at the new Wembley Stadium in June 2007.

Muse were initially penciled in for one show on at Wembley on Saturday, 16 June, but it sold out so quickly that they are to play a second gig on Sunday 17 June.

They will play in front of around 70,000 fans.

The Teignmouth indie band are widely acclaimed as the most exciting live act around at the moment - they were named Best Live Act at the 2006 Vodaphone Live Music Awards.

They have also been a big hit at major festivals, including Glastonbury, Reading and Leeds.

And, amid their hectic schedule, they also made time to play for their South West fans, at a sell-out gig at the Eden Sessions in Cornwall in August.

The announcement caps a hugely successful year for the trio - Matt Bellamy, Chris Wolstenholme, and Dominic Howard.

Their album, Black Holes and Revelations, went straight to number one when it was released in July 2006.

Robbie Williams and the Rolling Stones were each due to stage a series of concerts at the new Wembley, but the gigs had to be cancelled because the stadium wasn't ready.

The venue is costing some £757 million to build, but has been dogged with problems and delays.

Wembley Stadium's chief executive, Michael Cunnah, said: "Wembley Stadium is a world class music and sporting venue and we are thrilled that top British rock band Muse is going to be one of the first music acts to play here next June."

George Michael is set to be the first musical act to perform at Wembley - he has two shows on 9 and 10 June.

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jamisonwritestf2trash · 1 year ago

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Hello! I like your TF2 headcannons alot, what kind of song's do you think they would listen to? I have no idea if this has been asked or if there are canon answers, but I'd really like your take on it if ever! <33

What's Songs Do The TF2 Mercs Like?

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LOVE THIS. Thank you for your ask! This hasn't been requested yet, so I'm so excited to write it. I'm not sure if there's canon music taste and favorite songs either, but we can just ignore the Canon lmao. Also, mutual appreciation! Thanks for being a mutual 💖

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Also, it's totally not based on songs I've listened to or like, not at all. Completely unbiased. I'm going to give their top 3 favorite songs and why those are the top 3! I hope you like this, and I didn't go too far of the original ask 😭

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Demo -

1. Escape (The Piña Colada Song) Rupert Holmes. They find it funny in an endearing way. He likes the idea of love fading only to reconnect. (Does he choose to ignore the fact that they were both trying to cheat)

2. First - Cold World Kids. The second he heard this song, it hit him like a ton of bricks. He just thinks about every relationship he's lost and how unfairly he must have treated people and just ugh.

3. Problems - Mother Mother. He feels like a disgrace to people he cares about and people he loves. He listens to this music to make himself feel worse, but don't worry the other mercs always try and turn him to cheerful music when he's like that, but sometimes he genuinely likes Problems and First just from a liking music perspective.

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Engie -

1. 9 to 5 - Dolly Parton. Engie is the number one Dolly Parton fan. He's head of the fan club. Speak ill of her, and you'll never speak again. He can also just relate so well with a girl boss, because he is a girl boss.

2. Black Betty - Ram Jam. He loves uptempo songs to work to. He finds he works faster with them. I just think he thinks this song is so great for work.

3. Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy) - Big & Rich. This man. I wanted to be a cowboy so badly growing up! Let's him feel like a cowboy and just a fun song that he really likes playing. (For a while, he didn't know what the implications were. It was super fun when the other mercs caught him singing it and then having the meaning explained to him.)

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Heavy -

1. You're My Best Friend - Queen. He wants to be everyone's friend so bad! He wants someone to listen to this song and think of him. He just wants to be a good friend above all else. (He is! He just doesn't think so.)

2. Count On Me - Bruno Mars. Much like above, he wants to be a friend. He wants to be seen as dependable and caring. Scared he doesn't come off that way!

3. I'm Still Standing - Elton John. Resilient fighting, man! This is his hype song. It especially helps him after a bad match. It helps him remember that he does a lot to help carry the team and he shouldn't be so hard on himself.

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Medic -

1. Body - Mother Mother.

I never really touched on this in my previous headcanons but I think Medic also has some body dysmorphia. It's just not as bad as spys. I also think this man has vivid intrusive thoughts. I feel like this song for him is most of the things he thinks about put into words he doesn't have.

2. Are You Satisfied - MARINA. This. Man. Has. Never. Felt. Good. Enough. He's always set his own expectations of what he should be so high that he can never do anything but fall short. He also feels a lot of pressure from the other mercs and is always scared of disappointing them. He loves to hear someone else sing of the feelings he has.

3. The Dismemberment Song - Blue Kid. I had to throw this in. It was either of this or The Red Means I Love You. He loves both. He thinks their really good inspiration songs to go into surgery humming. Be afraid if this man comes at you while this tune is playing.

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Scout -

1. Get It Up -Mindless Self Indulgence. I don't know why but this song just feels like Scout is singing it. Like I genuinely think that he fucking wrote this song 😭 Likes the beat and the way the singer sounds more than the lyrics themselves.

2. Everywhere I Go - Hollywood Undead. See above. No, but genuinely he loves this song. Gives him such confidence for no reason. Makes him feel so cool. I do think he hasnt done anything like this. Yeah, he drinks,but he's never acted like the song. He just lives vicariously through it. Likes the lyrics more than the song in this case.

3. Without Me - Eminem. He wanted to be Eminem so bad! He wanted to be that controversial white boy who could rap. I think all of his favorite songs are just any white man's favorite song ever. He actually does good rapping the song without lyrics. You'd think it be embarrassing but it's actually not, somehow.

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Sniper -

1. Read Between The Lines - Tom Cardy. Come on, how is he not supposed to love this song. It fits him so perfectly. I definitely feel like he loves this song because he always feels like people should know how to understand him even though he isn't giving them anything to work with.

2. Ballroom Blitz - Sweet. He likes the beat and tempo of this song more than anything. He also likes the entire vibe of the song if that makes sense. He can also imagine "being the man in the back," an imaginary scenario king if you will.

3. Another One Bites The Dust - Queen. Took all my restraint not to make every song a Queen song. Had to keep reminding myself I could make a post for that on its own lmao. No one can convince me that this song doesn't play in his head when he gets a good kill. One time, just for fun, he tried to sync with the claps and was super successful.

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Spy -

1. Money, Money, Money - ABBA. I know this man is like probably 50 or something and has a son and whatever, but sometimes I forget that and think he's a 30 year old classy woman from the 1920s. So, in my mind, he likes ABBA. Likes Money, Money, Money though because he likes the idea of a rags to riches heist plot (that's what I imagine when I hear this song anyway)

2. Royals- Lorde. This man wants to be royalty so bad. He tries to be so classy and dignified, which is funny because you'd think he'd want to be as mundane as possible, but that's neither here nor there. I definitely feel like this song just makes him feel fancy.

3. Vous Le Voulez - ABBA. Yes, I did hc Spy as having two ABBA songs in his top three. No, I will not apologize. This man has definitely killed this song. And! He also dance fought to this song. (Think that one scene in Jumanji, the one with the Rock.)

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Soilder -

1. Party in The U.S.A - Miley Cyrus. I mean, can you really blame me for adding this one? I already added it to shitpost canon!

2. Cherry Pie - Warrant. Dad song! This is such a dad song, just like he's such a dad! This man just reminds me of any middle-aged white dad who grills and drinks beer. And I get that so much when I hear this song. So I'd think he'd like a dad song:)

3. Dragula- Rob Zombie. THIS MAN CAN YELL. He loves to sing (scream?) this song! It's a good song to start with, and the fact that he can have a fun time yelling and singing makes him happy!

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Pyro -

1. drop pop candy - reol, giga. I have this headcanon I never touched on for some reason. Pyro knows every human language that exists. So they love listening to music in other languages!They actually really like how sweet the music sounds in contrast to the actual lyrics.

2. My Axe - Insane Clown Posse. PYRO. IS. A. JUGGALO. 100%! You can't convince me that they haven't painted their mask to look like juggalo fave paint. Definitely would play this song in their head during a match. They just replace axe with fire or something similar.

3. Buttercup - Jack Stauber. They like most of Jack Staubers' music! They really like the different soft sounds and low tone music.

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Okay. I'm posting this hoping everything works! I've had to start this over 5 times and I am exhausted 😭

I loved this prompt, but I swear to god I got such back writers block halfway through just finding the songs they'd like. I'm really sorry if this turned out to be bad. I'm going to go sleep for the years.

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Soldier headcanons tomorrow!

#tf2 demoman #tf2 engineer #tf2 heavy #tf2 medic #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 headcanons #team fortress headcanons #tf2 soilder #tf2 spy #tf2 pyro

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