#the food is not dangerous to humans

[illya-roma]

Jazz, holding a mushroom stake she made for damian as gift at gun point: any last words?

Ectocontaminated mushroom stake : you mere mortal can not kill me in a way that matters.

Jazz, cocking the gun: try me

----

Jazz: Here, I made this for you

Tiny damian vibrating with excitement because his favourite chef made more food: Give me!

Jazz raises an eyebrow:...

Damian stops stuffing his mouth: Thank you, Jazlyn.

-----

Jazz, fist fighting a whole undead turkey: And always make sure to wear your gloves, we don't want a speck of ow dirt on it.

The turkey: * curses in turkey*

The chefs who's numbers are dwindling because Thalia hates that their food is not as delicious as the new cook's:

----

Ra's al ghoul forcing a blush down: *slowly takes a bit out of his food*

Ra's: ...

Ra's: DAMMIT Thalia the spaghetti is mine!

Thalia hiding in the walls:

-------

Thalia ogling at the new chefs muscles:

Jazz stabbing a screaming octopus: Hi! Can I help you?

Thaila an assassin, who's sitting on the counter right infront of Jazz, shamelessly staring at her: You could take of your chef jacket. I know blood can be hard to clean.

Jazz breaking it's spine: Good idea!

@phantom00maverick @jackpoompkin

[canisalbus]

For your gay little dogs

.

[taitavva]

NEVER GO HOME, DON'T SLEEP, DON'T EAT JUST DO IT ON REPEAT, KEEP?

[365 - Charli XCX / alt vers under cut]

[celestialbruise]

PIDW time travel fic where after dying Shen Jiu wakes up in the past, after the ling xi caves and his subsequent qi deviation, with a chance to change his fate. Bingge also wakes up in his fourteen year old body, memories fully intact. Now, instead of actually changing their ways Bingjiu just try to kill each other in increasingly violent, hilarious ways

[awesomecooperlove]

🧬💉⚰️

[potatoplace]

Rewatching some older wendigoon videos tonight and had a thought-

Backrooms x acotar

Reader falls through into the backrooms and is stalked for days by the entities, and is caught once she is weakened enough by the atmosphere of the backrooms.

It's Rhys and Feyre

She's their wifey now

Yes pls

Maybe becomes the group wifey with Cassian and Azriel too

Idk my brain is rotted today, I can come up with ideas but not string a sentence together for actual writing 😫

[bonefall]

Thinking about that one post about the 5000 year old teenager girl found buried with her collection of 180 sheep ankle bones but specifically the addition of how ankle bones were used as dice back then and she was a gamer.. what I'm getting at is: would clan cats make bone dice and Are They Gaming

First let me teach you a little bit about Knucklebones: The Game.

You probably know one of its variants better as Jacks, that game you play with a rubber ball and little metal spikes. There's a version of Knucklebones in nearly every culture, where the basic idea is to throw an object up in the air, pick up as many of the smaller objects as possible, and then catch the larger object before it hits the ground.

In cultures with a lot of access to livestock, usually the hand and ankle bones of sheep would be used. Places that don't have them might use rocks, seeds, shells, whatever. It was Ancient Greece that had such an extreme take on the game that it eventually evolved into dice-throwing-- a totally chance-based game where you would just throw the biggest foot bone of a sheep (the astralagus; equivalent to the talus in a human) and see how they landed.

So the girl they uncovered in Kazakhstan with the 180 sheep bones wasn't really buried "with dice," make sense? It's more like being buried with jacks. Central Asia is actually jam-packed with knucklebones-types games. Mongolian Shagai is recognized by UNESCO.

And it makes a TON of sense, because those regions are grasslands absolutely ideal for raising sheep.

SO. CLAN CATS.

There's two major considerations here;

ONE: The access to, and size of, sheep bones.

Clan cats don't kill sheep. TRIBE cats actually have access to sheep and kill one or two a year! I would actually like to give them a bunch of special uses for various parts of the sheep. I think the eagle-killing thing in canon is actually pretty ridiculous for several reasons

BUT THAT SAID, an astralagus is the size of a cat's paw.

[ID: A human holding an astralagus in the tips of its fingers.]

You'd need to play a different sort of game with this. It's more like a square softball to a cat than a little rubber ball.

Boar also have bones like this, though. A muntjac probably produces bones that are sized properly for a cat. Hares and rabbits are probably the BEST bet here though, which, somehow feels right. I'm not sure why, but WindClan seems like the gamerclan Clan that would think up these sorts of cute games.

Something about it fits their whole savvy culture, tunneling, emphasis on trade and invention pre-Heatherstar. ShadowClan and WindClan share a cultural value of innovation, but ShadowClan seems more... chemical and competitive.

Hard to explain it. ShadowClan invents flax retting and WindClan invents the drop spindle. There's overlap but it has a bit of a different flavor between them.

TWO: Range of motion

I've made BB!Cats have the same range of motion as the cats in canon, which is higher than a real cat. They're able to WEAVE, you can't do that without a basic pincher grasp. They're also able to mix herbs, wrap things up in leaves, and apply bandages.

I haven't actually given my reworked cats much more ability than they already had, I just codified rules based on what we already see.

But that said, they DO have less range of motion in their hands than humans. They have little thumbs and a better ability to grab, but can't twist their paws completely upwards. There's no way they can toss an object straight up, then catch it again.

So any games they do play would need to accommodate that. So far I've got Scratchstone, Teeterstrike, and an unnamed rhyme game. The bone game would need to look more like a game of marbles than jacks. Or, maybe more modified to accommodate swipes and strikes, somehow? Or a two-person game of catch?

Gotta think about it.

[chaosduckies]

Writing update hopefully later today!

Let’s just say for this one you never really realize just how much borrowers rely on humans… (Just to let you know that I have been writing and not dead)

[vullcanica]

Characters baring a mouth full of sharp fangs as show of aggression is top tier but can we talk about how sinister a flash of smooth square omnivore teeth can be. The implications therein? The difference between facing a carnivore vs a member of the terrifyingly, aptly named 'opportunistic eaters'? The fear of being on one's menu, the knowledge that you are on the other's - no matter what you are. The inherent danger of a threat display where there are set rules to avoiding harm turning into a hunt on a dime.

Anyway, thinking about Nikodemus and how beautifully all of this translates into his supernatural setting...

[gravityfalls4life]

July 14, 2024 (insert address here)

Dear Jesus "Soos" Ramirez,

theres a pond in the backyard of the shack

this is where i reside

please, if you choose to make this an attraction, let tourists throw in people food

i love people food

thank you

your friend the fish

Of course dude! I'll set it up right now if you like!

But... isn't human food bad for fish?

Meh. You win some you lose some.

[simultaneously]

STAN-!!

ALRIGHT- JEEZ.

[awesomecooperlove]

⚰️🌭🧛🏿‍♂️

[snakeeyesandangelfeathers]

...did God orchestrate the whole Job thing just to give Aziraphale and Crowley an opportunity to get closer

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads

The Last

slow building apocalyptic thriller

an american academic is at a conference in a remote Swiss hotel when a nuclear apocalypse strands him with just 20 others

50 days in, a body is found in a watertank and he becomes obsessed with investigating to find out who did it

even though the remaining people are just trying to quietly survive as supplies slowly dwindle and the winter approaches

[byanyan]

fledgling verse byan having an inherent distrust toward other vampires because they know a lot of them will automatically think less of them not only for being a fledgling (and one abandoned by their sire at that), but for being thinblooded as well. —and even that's assuming that they aren't seen as better off dead because of the latter point. like, they got enough of that as a human, dude, they don't need it from self-important kindred too.

just!!! baby vamp byan feeling like they don't fit in anywhere in this way that somehow manages to be even more miserable than it was in life!!!! and feeling that much more like they can't trust anyone because of it!!!!!

[akkivee]

is this what kuukou and jiro meant by the summer’s scorching heat

[hartxstarr-art]

ophelia doodle page