#the dang size difference on these two

[shiveagit]

Buggy ♥ Corazon

[lemon-lime-behavior]

Do you have any tips for drawing noses? Sorry this is out of nowhere but I'm wanting to improve on my art, specifically the faces, and it's always the nose I find myself struggling most with.

I really struggle w making it fit the face if that makes sense? Every time I try to add it it just throws the whole face off, especially the eyes, not to mention how to make different nose types and the angles </33

I love your art style so bad, it's so smooth and satisfying to look at and the way you draw noses like it's nbd (and anatomy in general like damn) baffles me so I was just wondering if you maybe had any tricks or not, Ty either way for sharing your art in the first place <33

@extravagav Well I can try! First off thank you very much, I often feel like I still have a very long way to go in regards to proportions and anatomy so I really appreciate your kind words <3

Hokay, so, noses. I do love noses. To start off when it comes to drawing noses I'm afraid I'm going to have to give you the most annoying advice in the world which is just to practice a lot. Find a lot of pictures of noses in a bunch of different shapes from a bunch of different angles and just draw them until your brain melts out of your ears. Pay particular attention though to the nose as a 3D object!

It's of course trickier to do than I'm making it out to be but the more you practice at imagining the nose as a 3d physical form the easier it becomes to make a nose model in your mind that you can rotate like a microwave.

This is my personal very very basic understanding of the nose's construction:

it's like three circles and a taco shell.

Okay so now that you've got a basic understanding of the nose's construction, how to put it in the middle of the god-dang face??

So the funky thing about noses is that they tend to change shape the least out of all our facial features when we're making expressions. Our eyes change shape, our mouths move, our eyebrows, our cheeks, our jaws, they all go all over the place. the nose, however, tends to be pretty stationary and doesn't deform much (save in one important way I'll get to later). So because of all this, and here's my biggest piece of advice when it comes to making the nose fit in the face, I like to draw the nose first! I do a very loose head construction, draw the nose, and then sort of "hang" the rest of the features off of it:

Two very different expressions, same nose!

Now when it comes to noses interacting specifically with the eyes the greatest thing to remember is that the part of the nose that sits between the eyes sticks out farther than you might think, and will likely be obscuring one of them, the extent of which depending a lot on the angle and how pronounced the nose bridge is.

for someone with a pretty flat nose bridge you'll be able to see most of the eye except in a more extreme angle, while someone with a protruding ridge might obscure the eye entirely. but the nose will likely be interacting with at least one eye if we're not facing the character head on. Really making your brain think in 3d is gonna most helpful here.

Finally! The nose being expressive! So the main way the nose plays in to expression is by wrinkling. the muscles that pull up your top lip and the muscles that pull down the middle of your forehead are almost all connected to the nose, so the nose tends to develop a lot of wrinkles whenever brows are furrowed or teeth are bared.

Adding those wrinkles can add a lot of impact in the expression! And not just angry ones neither:

Sooooooooooooooo yeah! noses! They're weird and they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and they can do a lot to add character to a face and they can also make you want to tear your hair out in big clumps! I'm still learning myself when it comes to noses (and most other things) and I'm faaaar from a master at it, but I hope I've been able to provide at least a little bit of help. If you do use my advice going forward please let me know! Good luck!!!!! (And here's all my nose "headcanons" for the strawhats. The ones who actually have human noses, anyway):

[ataraxiaspainting]

Blue Crow.

Yan Nobunaga x F Reader x Yan Uvogin. (College AU.)

Synopsis: Uvogin hates taking buses, but he enjoys seeing you one seat ahead of him.

Warnings: Yandere themes, non-con, the reader is described as AFAB and she/her pronouns are used, unhealthy relationships, brief mentions of drug/alcohol usage, victim blaming, oral (female receiving), oral (male receiving), sexual blackmail, and implied stalking.

Word Count: 5k.

somewhat inspired by the game classmates! check it out here if you'd like. <3

also inspired by @uvobreakmylegs's digging deeper! it's amazing! <3

*~*~*~*

The 5A station was the closest one to your dorm. It had no seats or shelter of any kind in case of bad weather, only a large blue sign that said Yorknew University, Nursing Program in white bold letters – because it didn’t say anything else about the buses that stopped by and because this stop is surrounded by old rotting trees, the drivers sometimes fail to notice you.

It’s raining now, and everything here is so dark – your clothes, your umbrella, the night sky, and your bag.

Your phone says the bus will be here any minute now, but will it even see you?

If not, you’ll have to find a different way to make it to Nobunaga’s place.

He seemed friendly enough. If you were a few minutes late, surely he’d understand. You were not close enough to invite him over, go inside his home, or let him drive you anywhere, though that is just how you are with all males you casually know. It’s nothing personal.

There are two bright lights a small distance away, and at the sight you raise your hand and wave.

By some miracle, the bus stops and opens its automatic doors.

You take a few steps as you close your umbrella and make your way up the stairs, being careful not to slip. You slip a few quarters into the little slot beside the driver and sit down on a seat near the window.

Taking off your hood, you ruffle your wet bangs out of your face, using your reflection to attempt to get them back to looking presentable. It doesn’t really work, but what does it matter? You’re just there to give Nobunaga some notes his friends wanted to give to him and leave. 

*~*~*~*

“You’re [First], correct?” Chrollo asks, putting his right hand out towards you.

You take out your earbuds, fixing your posture as you nod. A blonde man sits next to you on the bench before Chrollo could, smiling and giggling like he is some gossiping schoolgirl.

“Dang, you’re cute!” Shalnark exclaims. 

“Shal, what the hell are you doing?” Uvogin had started to stomp over. His mere size was enough to keep your eyes on him and not the others. Even the one girl who was with them didn’t draw your attention, despite her hair being unnaturally bright pink.

“Saying hi!” Shalnark put an arm around you. On instinct, you squirm a little bit, not noticing how Uvogin rolled his eyes in response to how Shalnark smirked at him. Once you were out of his loose grip, Chrollo politely cleared his throat.

“I was wondering if you could do something for us, Miss [First]. For the gang, I mean.” 

The gang? From what you knew, Chrollo’s group was always causing some sort of rule-breaking but Chrollo himself stayed at the top of the class with superb grades and plenty of attention from girls. It is like no one knew they were connected. They seemed like bad news, but all of your interactions with them had been positive thus far. Did Nobunaga put in the good word for you?

“Um… sure?” As long as it was something that didn’t land you in prison or the hospital, you decide to go along with what Nobunaga’s leader asks of you. It is probably a bad idea to reject, and maybe you’ll get something good out of it in exchange.

“I’d like you to give Nobunaga some notes he missed. He’s been out. Sick, most likely.” You didn’t notice the small piles of books he was carrying until he made them closer to you, wanting you to take them. “Surely you have noticed? He talks to you a lot, I hear.”

“Yeah.” You decide to put them on your lap for the time being. The notes weren’t as heavy as they would have been if you were carrying them. “Is… he doing better?”

“Not sure,” Uvogin says, attempting to pry Shalnark off the bench. “He hasn’t been answering his phone, you see.”

“I don’t wanna!” Shalnark whines.

“Shut up, Shal. You’re gonna make us look bad in front of Nobu’s girlfriend.”

Girlfriend?

“I’m… not his girlfriend…”

They don’t seem to hear you. You’re not exactly the loudest person, after all. You have been teased for having a soft voice and having to speak up. These people wouldn’t ignore you, you think. Shalnark and Uvogin are play fighting, and Chrollo is talking to that magenta-haired woman. They wouldn’t ignore you, you’re just being too shy. They wouldn’t ignore you, they are Nobunaga’s friends. Nobunaga wouldn’t ignore you, why would they?

“I’m… not his girlfriend.”

Uvogin is the only one to give you a response after hearing it. He shoots you a confused look before continuing to tickle Shalnark. No one else seems to notice your words.

After a few more tries, you decide to give up for now. Looking at the notebooks in front of you, you decide to open the top one up. There are just standard mathematical problems as well as some doodles and words of encouragement in the vacant spaces of the looseleaf. 

‘Go get them, tiger!’

‘Don’t die on me now!’

‘Remember one plus one?’

‘♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡’

At first, you think that it is Nobunaga’s girlfriend, but you shake your head to erase it. No. The gang thinks you are his girlfriend. 

Perhaps Shalnark then? From the times you sat near him in your chemistry classes, his handwriting was a mess. It took some effort to realize that he was simply drawing and not paying attention to the professor in the slightest. However, his favorite things to draw were bats and computers. Would he really draw hearts and not those things so Nobunaga could know it was him? 

Maybe it was an inside joke. You’re not going to ask because you don’t want your question to come off as disrespectful, though you were slightly curious.

You’ll just do what you were told and go right back home.

*~*~*~*

Shalnark texted you the address of Nobunaga’s place a few hours ago, but if you were being honest it took a while to decipher what he was saying. In between every five or so memes or videos he sent you there was a number or letter, maybe three at most if you were lucky.

You sat there with your phone in your hands for what felt like forever, not having the guts to ask Shalnark to just tell you straight up – because he wouldn’t, you know that.

From what you managed to gather from your online map, it seemed that Nobunaga’s place and Uvogin’s place were near each other, no more than a fifteen-minute walk at most. If they lived so close to each other, why didn’t one of them just visit the other? That was the third red flag you didn’t say anything about… and came to regret only half an hour later.

The electric sign attached to the entrance of the bus flickered from time to time with varying degrees of brightness. One person complained openly to the driver that the screen was so dark they did not know that they had missed their dormitory’s building. He didn’t care, only shrugging his shoulders and telling the student that ‘that’s life’. They got off murmuring curses you could hear from the middle part of the bus. Once again, he didn’t care. Like Shalnark, the driver wouldn’t take anything you say seriously; so you just used your online map to count the stops ahead.

“Hey.”

“Next stop: Aster Road, Thirds Street.” The automated message from the bus speakers loudly said, glitching a little after the word ‘Road’.

“Hey.” 

You failed to notice who was behind you as you were too busy counting the stops ahead on your phone.

“Hey.”

“Next stop: Ritas Street, Wilds Complex.”

“Hey.”

“Next stop: Neo Road, Neon Green.”

“Hey.”

“Next stop: Romeos Road, Kiki Terrace.”

“Hey.”

“Next stop-”

You failed to hear the name of the stop because the hand that tapped your shoulder startled you and made you turn your neck around to the seat behind you.

You see a familiar face despite the fading light – or should you say, a familiar body.

“O-Oh… hi… Uvogin.”

Satisfied you had finally noticed him, Uvogin puts his hands behind his head as he smirks. 

“Fancy seeing you so late,” he begins, looking down at your black bag. “Going to Nobu’s place, ain’tcha?”

“Yeah… you?”

“Basketball.”

Was Uvogin on the team too? If you remember correctly it was only Phinks, Feitan, and Nobunaga who were on it. Perhaps he just wanted to watch? Oh well. It’s not any of your business.

After remembering your last conversation with him yesterday, you decide to ask him why everyone thinks you are Nobunaga’s girlfriend – you only talked to him when necessary, in the classes you shared with him, but to be fair he also escorted you around the building most days.

“Listen… about that time…”

“What?” Uvogin turns his head, cupping his ear with his hand. “Speak up.”

“About Nobunaga and me…” You look down – at the books, at your cold wet hands, at the heels of your feet bouncing up and down. Your gut tells you that you’re making a mistake if you talk to him about you and Nobunaga’s relationship, or lack thereof. Your brain goes against it, saying that clearing things up will lead to less trouble down the line. 

Your heart is beating too fast to accept or reject the possibility. 

“Nobunaga and me…”

“You’re still talking too low,” Uvogin interrupts, his stare near-lethal to you. When you flinch at his words, his annoyance seems to disappear. “Hey, you can tell me. We’re friends, aren’t we?”

Yeah. Yeah, you’re friends or at least acquaintances. Saying the truth won’t hurt him and won’t hurt you. Maybe Shalnark’s teasing will go away. Maybe Chrollo won’t give you a task again. Maybe Nobunaga won’t be confused when he comes back to school.

“Nobunaga and me… aren’t dating-”

Uvogin’s expression changing wasn’t as fast as before, but his glare intensified as he stood up.

“Next stop: Nightstar Avenue, Owl’s Place.”

Your ears felt numb after you heard the ‘beep’ sound of someone pressing the stop button. Your eyes felt numb as you tried to see the details of Uvogin’s scowl in the dark.

It was Uvogin. He made the bus stop. But why?

It then hits you; this is the closest stop to Nobunaga’s place.

“Stop requested.” The speaker stated. The bus started to pull over next to a tall blue sign.

“Woah, the bus got here so quickly,” Uvogin says, going to the exit doors. When he didn’t hear you stand up too, he turned in your direction. “Don’t tell me you don’t know the directions to your boyfriend’s house?”

“Please exit through the rear door.” Another automated message. Uvogin presses on the door and it lets him out. After a few more seconds you follow him – your gut tells you that you must.

He helps you down with his much larger hands despite you not really needing it – there are handrails on the doors for that.

“What were you saying?” Uvogin asks. “Something about Nobunaga?”

There is a lit street lamp above the sign. It doesn’t flash like the ones near your dormitory and is much brighter. Despite the weather still being stormy, you can see houses a small distance away – not just the street. 

You can see that Uvogin is smiling again.

“Nothing… It’s nothing.”

“Oh?” He sneers, his smirk getting even bigger. “You didn’t want relationship advice?”

“No…” You reply, your hands going to your backpack’s zipper to make sure the notes don’t get too wet.

“Nobunaga likes mochi. Maybe you can get some for him next time. Daifuku especially. He’d be so happy, maybe he’ll stop skipping class with me.” 

A sigh comes out of both of you at the same time for much different reasons. 

“But I don’t want that to happen… hmm.”

*~*~*~*

The outside of Nobunaga’s house wasn’t the house that stood out the most in this neighborhood. It had rather small walls that had peeling white paint in places closer to the ground, and cigarettes and used needles were thrown all over his dead lawn. The only thing you somewhat liked was the rusty gold sign beside the front door that read 251 – and only for the styling of the numbers.

“Here’s the place,” Uvogin says, patting your back as a way to gently push you forward. “Go on, doorbell's right there.”

You were forced up the steps with a force you knew was gentle for Uvogin but not for you. A trembling finger approaches the button slowly – as if using it would make you lose it via a guillotine’s blade.

Doing so didn’t because this is reality, but the pain in your heart feels similar to such a fate anyway. After a few more seconds and the door still being closed, Uvogin knocks loudly.

“[First]’s here!” His yell almost made you cry.

Your name may as well have been the password because Nobunaga opens the door right away. He pants a little like he was running to greet you two.

“Oh fuck, you made it! I thought the storm woulda scared you away.”

Nobunaga didn’t look very sick; he wasn’t wearing a shirt, had his hair down, and only his boxers covered his lower half. He didn’t look very sick; he actually looked quite well. Those signs scared you more than Uvogin’s subtle threat – if his glaring was intended to be such, that is. You don’t step past the doorway, leaving Uvogin to stand in the rain as you take off your backpack. But when you try to undo the zipper, you feel both of their hands touching you up and down as their grins widen.

“Stop that,” You murmur, attempting to step back. Your spine was greeted by Uvogin’s front half. You feel something pressing into you. Once you figured out what it was, you started to go under one of Uvogin’s arms. His leg caged you in then.

“She’s cute, Nobu.”

Nobunaga doesn’t answer in words – he only chuckles and continues to have his hands resting on your hips.

“Listen. Your notes are here, Hazama.” You say, making an effort to still be nice, to still be understanding. You don’t want to scream because what if you’re misreading something? You don’t want anyone to… be framed for something they didn’t do, right?

“It’s Nobunaga.”

“Huh?”

“Call me Nobunaga,” You’re pushed and pulled more. Before you can blink, you’re thrown on the couch’s back. Uvogin is the one who lets go of you and the one who locks the front door, Nobunaga is too busy feeling the back of your thighs. “I’m your boyfriend – it’s normal to call each other by our first names, right?”

Boyfriend?

Was… Was he…

Was he the one who told his gang you’re dating?

“I missed you, baby.” He murmurs, leaning down and pecking your neck. 

He doesn’t seem to note how you’re trembling now.

“Stop.” 

Uvogin simply gets closer. He doesn’t touch you, but he crosses his arms smirking as he leans against the sofa’s frame.

“Stop,” You repeat, trying to push Nobunaga harder off of you.

It’s not an order either of them recognize, so Uvogin continues to stare and Nobunaga continues to kiss your body.

“Stop!” Your tone makes Uvogin slightly shift. He frowns and his arms uncross. 

He takes a few steps towards you. 

“Nobunaga.” Uvogin’s voice is cold now, like how it was when you were about to get off the bus. You freeze. Nobunaga doesn’t stop – he doesn’t even look at Uvogin. “Nobunaga.”

“Stop, Haz-”

“Watch it.” Uvogin glares at you. “It’s ‘Nobunaga’ for you.”

He’s not… He’s not going to help you?

“Yeah.” Nobunaga agrees, pulling you further into his embrace.

“Let go of me!” You snap and push harder than you did before – and manage to finally ply him off of you.

Nobunaga stares down at you. He is now still. He doesn’t blink. His smile has slightly faded, but it is still there. There are subtle movements in his hands. His fingers are curled up. They want to grab something again.

They want to grab you.

“Don’t joke around like that, princess,” Nobunaga finally says, taking a few steps too close to you. “Not many guys are willing to forgive their girl for pushing them away like that. You almost screamed my ears off.”

“I’m not joking!”

“You are.” Uvogin interrupts, stomping his feet. “You are and I am starting to get annoyed. What about you, Nobu?”

“I’m just here to give notes Lucilfer told me to give to Hazama! I’m not here for anything else.”

Nobunaga’s gaze lingers on your backpack for a few silent moments after you say that. “Really… nothing else?” 

“No, she’s here to cheer you up, Nobu,” Uvogin says, attempting to give a warm smile to his best friend. “She’s… just shy.”

The glare he gives you when Nobunaga’s eyes aren’t on him makes you feel like you are about to see God.

“...Right, [First]?”

You don’t respond right away, but Nobunaga does. He giddily smiles like a child on Christmas morning.

“Oh, you!”

He hugs you – his skin feels akin to slime and his hair clings onto your neck in little bunches. You feel unbrushed knots and his heart beating fast with adrenaline. When your own heart mimics the motion, Nobunaga thinks you are simply being shy – Uvogin had once again fed his delusions.

“She brought you the notes you missed. Even wrote a few cute lines in the blank spots.” Uvogin smirks as you look at him in horror. “She wanted me to come with her. Was anxious about missing your bus stop, sweet thing.”

He walks over to your backpack and grips onto the zipper. You attempt to stop him, walking a bit forward and trying to raise your hand, but Nobunaga’s grip is too strong. Within only a few seconds, the stack of notebooks Chrollo had given you is in Uvogin’s hands. He opens a page and starts reading aloud the cute notes someone else had written.

“Go get them, tiger.” 

He turns to another page. 

“Don’t die on me now.”

Then another.

“Remember one plus one?”

Then another.

“A whole bunch of hearts here…”

He then turns to a section you hadn’t looked at before – the back page.

“With lots of love, your one and only girlfriend [First].”

Oh shit. Oh shit.

Did his gang set you up?

…They did. They did.

This is bad. So very bad.

“I never-”

“Stop being so shy with your boyfriend, [First].”

“Why are you being so difficult?” Nobunaga asks, slightly frowning as you protest.

You have to get out of here – fast. If you distract them enough, maybe you’ll be able to make it outside. But they’re faster than you, just better overall when it comes to physicality-

Uvogin’s hand rests on your shoulder, silencing any thoughts or ideas he does not approve of.

“I know what she wants.”

“Huh?” You and Nobunaga ask simultaneously with two distinctly different tones.

It then dawns on both of you what he means – because his shirt is tossed on the couch before you can even take a step toward the front door.

“I know what she wants.” Uvogin repeats.

He wants nothing more than to put you on your knees as he unzips his pants and as Nobunaga keeps you down. He wants nothing more than for Nobunaga afterward to have a turn – or he could go first if he wishes. One of his fingers and one of Nobunaga’s own will be forced into you after your own clothes are discarded. Two tongues will slather all over your pussy like thirsty dogs – and after a few pictures are taken you’ll stay the night with Nobunaga while he makes his way to tell Chrollo that his idea was a success.

“I really couldn’t have done it without you, boss.”

-You try to scream and Nobunaga’s hand muffles your mouth’s cries.

“Don’t go being such a brat,” Uvogin continues, “When all you really want are two bodies to love on you.”

Your arms are grabbed and you are dragged up the stairs.

In a last attempt to get out of here, your legs spread out on the stairs and kick around at Nobunaga – but the fight is short-lived because they thump so roughly with each wooden step and it hurts; Nobunaga makes a note to finally get rid of any rotten oak once you leave.

The bedroom isn’t as spacious as Uvogin had hoped. Clothes were scattered all over the place already; most Nobunaga’s but others were clearly from past flings or some of yours that he had managed to steal. Your dorm was nicer despite it being the same size as the bedroom and your bed being even smaller. But at least yours had a frame and covers.

Maybe later Uvogin will stop by to see you crying yourself to sleep and to take some trophies.

Your white panties were a favorite of his, but Uvogin wouldn’t mind a little bit of change in his collection. A few bras perhaps or a few black thongs. He hopes for whole lingerie sets, but he knows it will only happen if he is lucky that particular evening.

Uvogin sits on the bed first. He thinks about pulling on your hair to make you sit on the dirty floor, but he dismisses the idea. That would be hurting you more than he has to and Nobunaga would be upset at him inevitably having long strands on his palm.

“Hey Nobu,” He says, unzipping his pants and boxers as he quickly tugs them both down to his ankles. “Make sure she’s comfy as we do this, okay?”

It took a while for you to stop crying after that. It took a while for you to do a lot of things Uvogin and Nobunaga wanted you to do. It took a while for you to take just the tip of Uvogin’s penis. Nobunaga had told Uvogin to take it slow when you had finally clamped your lips around him.

“It’s her first time, Uvo – be gentle, okay?”

Uvogin almost laughed at the irony he managed to leave unsaid.

He didn’t want Nobunaga to get upset with all the information he had attained while stalking you for months. You were supposed to just be his little secret he pinned down once in a while, but then Nobunaga just so happened to share a few classes with you.

He fell for you too. Uvogin had never felt any negative emotion for Nobunaga ever over their years-long friendship, but the slight tinge of envy he possessed the moment he found out could almost count.

Oh well, he thinks. I still have pictures of you that he does not. Pictures I would rather not have him see and you probably don’t either.

Just for future reference in case you acted up too much, though Uvogin could always take the more physical route.

Though once again he remembers that Nobunaga is in the picture now. Though their bond is as strong as forged steel, he knows that his friend has always been a bit too controlling when it comes to what he has and loves.

Whether that be simple instant ramen or expensive bottles of brandy, Nobunaga has always had a habit of stowing his possessions away where no one can even look at them.

Uvogin understands although Nobunaga had said nothing about you being something to own. Uvogin understands because he sees how he looks at you.

It’s not disgust he feels. It’s something much less potent, but he cannot put his finger on the exact word. Machi had described it perfectly once when they were all in their mid-teenage years.

He doesn’t bother to remember right now.

You are more important.

You look prettier than he had ever seen you – precum is leaking a little from your lips as little noises come out of them too.

Please. Please.

Please.

You’re not in tears right now.

Uvogin is glad. You in makeup is nice to look at, but he knows that since it is absolutely pouring outside you didn’t want to put some on. Either for that reason or because you knew that Nobunaga was just a friend, despite what Nobunaga in return has told the Troupe. It’s cute, really.

Maybe later he can pull this when he inevitably breaks into your dorm or even in a study room in the university’s library. You’ll have makeup on when you feel like it or when he forces you to. He can ask Pakunoda about how to apply mascara and stuff. She’ll teach him. As a bonus, she won’t tease him like Shalnark does daily.

Thinking more about the idea, Uvogin makes the mistake of letting go of your face.

You cough louder than he had expected. Your spit is now all over the wooden floor Nobunaga has to clean up later. The floors are water resistant. But not waterproof. Uvogin has to remember that there is in fact a difference. Hopefully, it won’t stain and rot like the stairs did, but if it does Uvogin wouldn’t mind paying for the damages.

He wouldn’t mind paying you to keep silent about this too – or he’ll make the cops silent if it came down to it.

“Oh,” Nobunaga rubs your arched back as you squirm and saliva runs down from your clearly sore jaw. He sounds disappointed, but trying not to let it show. It’s not successful. Every person Nobunaga has ever crossed can read him like a book, not that Nobunaga knows about it. Or maybe he does and just doesn’t want to admit it. “You spat it all up. Didn’t wanna swallow it?”

You don’t respond. Uvogin is getting used to that by now. Not Nobunaga though.

“Shh… it’s okay.” Nobunaga senses your distress but thinks it is just shyness. Uvogin is getting used to that too. “It’s okay… you did such a great job.”

“Home,” You choke out. “Please… let me go home now…”

“What are you talking about, sweetheart?” Nobunaga asks, turning his head a little. “We’re not done here.”

“Please… Please, I-”

“Shh.” Uvogin interrupts. Now it is his turn to play the good guy here. “Nobu still hasn’t had his turn, remember? Thankfully he won’t use your mouth.”

A blend of hope and fright is in your gaze. Uvogin didn’t have to get used to that one. He has seen it too many times with all sorts of people. Chrollo loves that look. Feitan loves it too. Maybe their partners’ eyes are like that as well. A ginger-haired girl avoids Chrollo like the plague and Uvogin hasn’t seen that look particularly on her. Apparently, she does in fact beg him for things. With how prideful she acts, Uvogin would pay money to see that.

“He’ll use his,” Uvogin says. He stands up, zipping his pants back to how they used to be. There are a few white stains here and there, but nothing the laundromat wouldn’t fix. “Then you can go home. Okay, princess?”

You’ll get used to this, Uvogin thought to himself. Everyone gets used to things. Even death.

[canon-in-too-deep]

Free Grimms' Fairy Tales Typeset

I am so very excited to present free typeset #33: Grimms' Fairy Tales, by, of course, Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm. (Apologies for this being quite a long post, but I really wanted to show pictures of what's available in these typesets!) When I saw this in my ask box, I knew I had to do a typeset for it. But there were so many individual tales, and I wanted to do something a bit unique for each of them. But I also wanted to use a lot of color. And throw in some art. And that might make the typeset not so super printer friendly for some folks, so....

I made two versions of this typeset! Two different designs and color options. Both pdfs are available for FREE here and are sized for half letter (letter folio).

Grimms' Fairy Tales typeset version one is the full color version with a lot of little details and different art/motifs for each story (most of the art I used was by Maurice Pillard Verneuil; his stuff is so pretty).

And for the second version of the typeset (which I dubbed the Black and White, Hold the Art Alt in my google drive archive--I need a shorter name for that. The Deep Drive? Drivechive? Googachive?--I went black and white printer friendly, with prominent featuring ornaments and a more simple design.

You can see the differences clearly above. Both these typesets were a lot of fun to make, and I hope they print out well for people wanting to use them. It's one I hope to be able to print out soon for myself, to have as a personal physical copy. I kept stopping in the middle of typesetting just to read a few tales. (Cat-Skin and Snow White and Rose-Red are my two favorite tales (I just love the changed appearance lover trope), though The Juniper-Tree has a a solid standing with best revenge death.) Anyway, use these typesets as you wish! If there's any issues with the files, feel free to let me know! Just please leave credit and consider tagging me if you use them, or reblog if you can! More details and interior shots of the first version are below the break!

So the black and white version has pretty much the same design across all the different chapters, while the color version has a different swatch of art featured next to each title, to give some flair to each individual story. The whole double border around the drop caps was inspired by another (much more talented than I) member on Renegade Bindery, but I added in the extra picture frame for the motifs and changed some things around to get the sort of clean, classic, elegant vibe I was hoping for (originally, I was going to use good ol' IM FELL English and go with a much more gritty, vintage-y design, but changed it after seeing how well Crimson Text worked for the fairy tales (like I've said before, Crimson Text is a special occasion sort of font). Here's some more screenshots of the chapter beginnings (albeit a bit pixelated. Dang screenshots and their low quality):

The table of contents is pretty fun as well, extending the same borders and motifs design to full three pages:

And the fun also extended to the last page with info on the Brothers Grimm:

All in all, this was one of my favorite books to work on. If you have any suggestions for future typesets, my ask box is always open! Edit: also, the borders/frames going around the dropcaps were inspired by a design I saw done by the talented @teleportbooks!

[tanadrin]

The United States should go back to having thirteen states

On the basis that the 13-star flag was the best version, and that 50 is just too many dang states, I present my proposal for a 13-state United States of America. State names are placeholders only; presumably the inhabitants of these states would want to name them something different.

State boundaries are intended to attempt to respect both geographical features and approximate internal cultural borders of the United States, keeping contiguous regional cultures more or less grouped (e.g., the Ozarks are mostly within Texas-Louisiana; all of New England is in the Northeast; the Piedmont region is entirely within the Mid-Atlantic state, etc.). I have also tried to reduce the insane population disparity between states as much as was reasonable; but since the three non-contiguous states, Alaska, Hawaii, and Puerto Rico, are necessarily culturally and geographically distinct, they are kept as separate states. Also since they're each individual states with their present borders, I was lazy and only drew the 10 contiguous states.

The thirteen states are:

Northeast: About 34 million inhabitants. Capital: Boston; House delegation: 42 members; Senators: 10; EC votes: 52

Mid-Atlantic: About 41 million inhabitants. Capital: Richmond; House delegation: 51 members; Senators: 12; EC votes: 63. Contains the national capital (Washington-D.C.)

Ohio River-Appalachia: About 39 million inhabitants. Capital: Wheeling; House delegation: 48; Senators: 12; EC votes: 60

Southeast: About 44 million inhabitants. Capital: Jacksonville; House delegation: 54; Senators: 12; EC votes: 66

Michigan-Superior: About 37 million inhabitants. Capital: Green Bay; House delegation: 46; Senators: 10; EC votes: 56

Kansas-Missouri: About 24 million inhabitants. Capital: Kansas City; House delegation: 30; Senators: 6; EC votes: 36

Texas-Louisiana: About 40 million inhabitants. Capital: Shreveport; House delegation: 50; Senators: 12; EC votes; 62

Cascadia-North Plains: About 26 million inhabitants. Capital: Idaho Falls; House delegation: 32; Senators: 8; EC votes: 40

California: About 41 million inhabitants. Capital: Sacramento; House delegation: 51 members; Senators: 12; EC votes: 63

Arizona-New Mexico: About 19 million inhabitants; Capital: Albequerque; House delegation: 24; Senators: 6; EC votes: 30

Alaska: About 730,000 inhabitants. House members: 1; Senators: 1; EC votes: 3

Hawaii: About 1.4 million inhabitants. House delegation: 2; Senators: 1; EC votes: 3

Puerto Rico: About 3 million inhabitants. House delegation: 4; Senators: 1; EC votes: 5.

Total House size is 435, total Senate size is 103, and the total number of EC votes is still 538.

(Obviously in principle I would support abolishing both the Senate and the Electoral College, but if for some reason you were going to keep them, I think at minimum you would have to reform the whole "one state, two senators" rule, ergo I have gone for a form of proportionality here, although not so proportional as House delegations.)

[tourturestarradio]

𝐒𝐄𝐀 𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

Pairing: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji (more added later) x Mermaid reader!

Prompt: After your family jewels were stolen you were determined to get them back joining you closest friend Monkey D. Luffy on his adventure to become the king of the pirates.

Warnings: none, this follows the live action!!

Part 1

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮

⋆｡°✩ ┊         ┊       ┊   ┊    ┊        ┊               ┊         ┊       ┊   ┊   ˚★⋆｡˚  ⋆ ┊         ┊       ┊   ⋆                                                                                                         ┊         ┊       ★⋆ ┊ ◦ ★⋆      ┊ .  ˚            ˚★

𝐒𝐍𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐀𝐒𝐓 my brothers I swam around to find the secret room, my father was as usual out doing important man stuff whatever that was...I got to the door placing my hand on it, I wondered how my dad even got that purple glow. I focused hard onto the door, squeezing my eyes shut "work dang it!"

I focused as hard as I could a light blue glow formed around my hands causing the heavy door to seemingly unlocked, smiling widely I stared at hands "it worked!" I pushed open the door and saw a line of necklaces.

Mines being all the way at the end, I swam up to it looking at all our different necklace designs.

They all had the same gem stone they were just different colors. I ran my fingers across my necklace picking it up carefully.

I swam out of the room closing the door behind me, I quickly swam out of the house and up to the surface to where me and Luffy would hang out on the docks.

I slid the necklace on, I didn't feel any different whatsoever. I looked down at my tail and saw well, my tail. Not a single leg in sight, I rubbed the necklace "hm maybe it isn't magi-" I saw a light green spark "huh?" the water started to swirl around me light green sparks zapping around my tail.

I started to grow dizzy as the water spun me around, but oddly enough I felt my tail start to separate into two my flipper shrinking in size and my scales disappearing. I squeezed my eyes shut as the bubbles flared up into my face, I looked down as the bubbles stopped.

And I saw...legs! actual human legs!! I climbed onto the docks, I tried to stand up but my legs wobbled and I fell down "aha! I have legs!" I still had my fins but they were smaller and the webbing in between my fingers was gone and my normal (f/c) skin looked blotchy some patches of skin were a (s/c) while others were (f/c). My father had told me about it but I had time remembering what it was called.

It was similar to what humans experienced called vitiligo. 

I looked back down to my legs wiggling my toes, I tried standing up again, I stood up straight my legs wobbling "o-ok making progress..." I took a step forward and fell flat on my face "ow..."

"Oi, you need help...uh walking?" I looked up and saw one of shanks crew mates, had brown skin and a blonde afro, I nodded "aren't you Luffy's little pirate queen?" he asked, could feel my fins warm up "u-um yes" he tilts his head, he pulled me up to my feet holding the back of my dress.

Wait I had clothes? I had a swimsuit that looked like a dress, I held the back of the males pants stumbling trying to walk "right foot....then left foot...right foot then...left foot..." I mumbled, I wobbled with every step but hey! At least I was walking!

As we walked I saw so many different people! Big, small, short, tall, pretty, ugly, it was very exciting!

"Oi Luffy guess what fish grew legs!" I heard the taller male exclaim, I peeked from behind his leg I saw Luffy sitting down looking sad a few stitches under his eye. He tilted his head but his eyes lit up as he saw me standing I waved to him. He jumped down from his seat and ran over to me tackling me down into a hug.

"You have legs!" he smiles widely, I smiled back nodding "they're hard to use though..." Luffy held my hands "here i'll help you!" we both began walking I followed his walking pattern.

He had a cheeky grin on his face "see it's not so hard is it?" we walked around the small bar a green haired woman looking down at the two of us with a smile.

Letting go of me he exclaimed "hey wait look what I can do!" Lifting his arm the woman cut in "Luffy no." he frowned and dropped his arm. I rubbed his back "well m-maybe you could show me around?"

Luffy brightened up tremendously "yeah! come on let's go!" he tried to run off but I wasn't used to moving too quickly and toppled over on top of him "s-sorry!" my fins glowed as I stumbled off of him. He sat up his cheeks dusted light pink, but he still got up and held my hand helping me walk.

Eventually he let go of my hand "you should try it on your own!" I gulped "b-but what if I fall!"  "come on Y/n just try it!" I shakily let go of his hand steadying myself I muttered "right foot first...then left foot...right foot...left foot"

Luffy smiled "see you're doing it!" I continued to walk around "I think I got it!" Luffy hugged me tightly "yay! I knew you could do it!" I hugged back tightly.

They two's friendship grew as strong as a rip current, nothing could truly pull the two apart. Over time the mermaid would sneak back to the surface to hang out with her only friend.

Then she suddenly just disappeared for a few months, Luffy waited for her everyday, for hours but she just didn't show up which wasn't like her at all.

He thought she just decided not to return.

Suddenly she was back, saying she had to take care of a few things for a while. Oddly enough she wouldn't return home, she'd swim around for a while but then she'd just come back up on shore.

Whenever Luffy asked about it she'd get upset and change the topic so Luffy just didn't talk about it anymore.

Growing up Luffy's brown skin got lighter but he still had a tan, his hair stayed curly, but he grew taller.

But not taller than Y/n, she grew to about 5'10 pretty tall but all that height was from her tail, the longer your tail the taller you'd be if you had legs, so it's safe to say she wasn't done growing.

Y/n looked mostly the same apart from her hair growing longer, but she grew to be a real beauty. Most people were either looking at her face or her thighs.

Another fun fact about being a mermaid, it made your thighs thicker for some weird reason. Y/n was a tad bit embarrassed about it but Luffy had utterly zero problems with it.

He quote "love how squishy they are, and they are great to lay on" but she must keep a watchful eye out. On more than one occasion he bit her thighs because they reminded him of marshmallows.

The only thing Y/n hated about being on land was the fact that she had to wear clothes! In all the time she spent as a mermaid she only ever had to wear a bathing suit top, that's it!

Apart from that she didn't need to worry about pants or skirts or shorts! But she hated the feeling of any fabric rubbing up against her legs specifically her fins that were located on the sides of her calves.

Y/n would wear short skirts, or shorts, shirts weren't really a problem for a while until, her gills stretched out a bit on her neck so anything rubbing up on that made her uncomfortable.

So she wore tank tops or tube tops, no long sleeves because once again her fins got in the way.

.

Speaking of the two somewhere far off in the east blue a boy with pink hair and round glasses cleaned the lower deck of a ship mildly annoyed when he heard a thumping noise and muffled voices.

"W-Wait don't move I think I can kick out the lid.."

He followed the voices to a barrel that was shaking around.

"Your legs are in the way"

"u-um Luffy can y-you move your hand"

"why? i'm only touching your thighs?"

"N-No you're n-not"

"hey look your fins are glowing!"

The pink haired boy cocked his head to the side slowly stepping closer to the now glowing barrel.

"o-ok watch your head I'm gonna kick the lid"

Just as the voice said, a hard thumping noise and suddenly the lid slammed off the top, he heard more shuffling and a head popped out, it was a boy with a straw hat.

The pink haired boy shouted and stumbled away, Luffy got out of the barrel, while Y/n pulled herself out, but not without knocking over the barrel causing her to fall over.

Crawling out Y/n dusted herself off fixing her necklace. She tried to stand at her full height but she smacked her head on the roof of the lower deck. "O-ow..." following the sound of Luffy's voice she saw him talking to a pink haired boy, he stared at her.

She smiled and waved at him, he loosely waved back. They both stopped when they heard low snoring "wait is that a sea beast?" he snickered, the boy shook his head "no it's just Alvida snoring. if you both want to get out of here it's now or never" the two followed the boy.

Peeking their head out from the lower deck Y/n, Luffy, and the boy made their way up top Y/n staying close to Luffy.

She glanced around them seeing the sleeping crew mates, the pink haired boy handed Luffy an oar as he was about to send both them off but Luffy turned "Y/n do you need-" he stopped when he accidentally smack the oar into the side of a pole causing it to ring out loudly.

Y/n panicked as the crew started to wake up, while Luffy didn't look fazed at all.

"What's going on?"

Walking up a woman most likely the captain looked at the three, her gaze stopping on the pink haired boy. "Koby what's this? you're betraying me now?" Koby stammered "n-no captain Alvida...let me explain-"

She looked over at Luffy "you're too short and scrawny to be Roronao Zoro." he smirked at her "I'm Monkey D. Luffy," she placed her white hat on "never heard of you." "well, remember that name because i'm gonna be king of the pirates."

Both her and her crew laughed, Y/n glared lightly at the woman. "You must be new around here boy. because who's the most powerful pirate on the seas?" she looked around hearing her crew mates yell out "Captain Alvida!" she looked at Koby who stood silently.

She raised a brow "I'm sorry I didn't hear you Koby? who's the most powerful pirate on the seas?" Koby gulped nervously Y/n gently pulled Koby behind her "h-he doesn't have to answer you." Y/n wanted to punch herself in the face for stuttering. Alvida looked her up and down.

Clicking her tongue she asked "who're you?" Luffy smiled over to his close friend, "I'm Y/n Angelfish and I'm gonna be Queen of the sea!" Alvida looked somewhat interested "Angelfish huh?...so there is still one of you left." Luffy looked mildly confused, but he spoke "Koby is his own man, right?" he looked at Koby "shut up,"

Alvida spoke again "no, no, no he's not. He's mine and he'll always be mine." Luffy chuckled and raised the oar up "that's not what he told me. he said you were mean, and cruel, and you're as dumb as a sea cow" poor boy was shaking like a leaf.

Alvida was fuming now she swung the spiked club at the three, they ducked down causing her to hit the side of a wooden banister.

She swung the club back around making the people around her back up seeing as she almost hit them. One of her crew mates pulled out a gun and shot Luffy but he only puffed his chest out and the bullet popped right on out.

Shocking everyone but Y/n.

"Woah that was fun."

Alvida looked confused "what kind of monster are you?" she asked swinging at him once again only for him to stretch his torso and evade her attack.

He smirked at her "the stretchy kind."

He reached his arm back stretching an abnormally long "Gum gum!" her swung his arm forward "Pistol!" punching Alvida right off the boat.

Y/n looked over the edge of the boat, "uh is she gonna be ok?" Luffy only shrugged and walked away muttering something about needing food for a few days. Y/n was going to follow him but suddenly got light headed, she gripped the side of the boat "u-uh Luffy..." he turned around.

Seeing how she wobbled he came to her side quickly "you forgot how to walk again?" he joked, Y/n let out a small dry chuckle "water..." she mumbled, Luffy nodded and helped her sit on the side of the boat while Koby watched in confusion.

That confusion changed to shock as he watched Luffy push the girl overboard. He ran over leaning over the edge "w-what did you do?!" Luffy kept his smile "don't worry she'll be okay. Trust me, now come on let go get some food."

Koby looked over the edge, he could have sworn he saw a faint green glow but it quickly disappeared. Luffy dragged him away "come on"

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮

A/n: hope you enjoyed!

[rex101111]

Ratchet and Clank size matters got added to the PSN store and I got a a major nostalgia pang so I went "eh, why not" and quickly played through it. And I do mean quickly, I know it was a PSP title but dang, last time I finished a R&C game this quick i played Nexus. Anyway, the thing that struck me about this game is that Ratchet is...a bit of an asshole here. And that struck me as odd because for the last few entries...he isn't.

Like this is still early series Ratchet, still on the PS2/PSP, released just before the first PS3 title, which was in retrospect a bit of an incredibly soft reboot. In the newer games, Ratchet is a fairly straight forward protag, nice, willing to help, only a little bit sarcastic if he's really strapped for time or dealing with someone especially annoying. Early Ratchet? Early Ratchet was a jackass, a dick, a selfish, quick tempered loner that only went on this quest because there was a tangible, direct benefit to him specifically. Seriously, in the first game Ratchet couldn't go two sentences without insulting somebody, and that's when he's in a good mood. In act 2 he's even worse, gnashing his teeth at everyone he talks to and threatening to sell Clank for scrap. It takes hours of in game time and half a dozen levels before Ratchet finally chills out, and a few more levels before he actually resolves to act like any sort of hero, and even that only happens after something he personally cares about gets threatened. Ratchet could give a damn, he can be convinced to help people, but he's still a selfish person who needs the situation rubbed in his nose before he realizes how dire it is. Clank having faith in him, throughout the entire game, even when he's being a dick, even when Clank himself is furious with him, meant something. When in the penultimate level he says "that's the Ratchet I always knew was there" and Ratchet brushes him off, you buy it, that beneath this sharp outside there's someone with the capacity to be a hero, an actual hero, a hero who isn't selfless, but one capable of overcoming his selfishness when it matters most.

Back when the first game came out, people complained about this, about their platformer mascot protag being a huge dick, and even the very next game addressed this by toning him down a smidge, but Ratchet in the PS2 trilogy is still very much not a perfect sunshine person. He's very sarcastic, pretty cynical, is very quick to call other people on their bullshit, and still has a very short temper. (Plasma city, anyone?) Ratchet had texture to him, he bounced off the much more straightforwardly nice Clank in a lot of ways, their friendship felt like it had weight and meant something because these two had so many differences between them that the fact they did get along so well and cared about each other so much showed that their friendship was genuine. I like the newer Ratchet and Clank games, played every one of them, but I've never been really happy with the direction they took with Ratchet. Each game made him nicer, friendlier, smoothing down his edges. And the reboot game had it the worst, they retold the first story, where Ratchet was at his worst and a major thread of the plot was him learning to get over his bullshit, but had the sanded down kitty cat of the later games instead of having confidence in their early work. Dickhead Ratchet worked, he had a place and it gave him a place to grow, while still maintaining his inherit sharpness. Ratchet should get to be an asshole again, just for a bit, let him get angry, properly. Sure, he's a hero who's saved two galaxies three times over and then some, but he did that while being a sarcastic little shit who made a joke about a plumber's ass crack showing and fired rockets at people while complaining about how high the prices are everywhere he went.

I dunno, maybe its a bit too late in the game to say this, but something got lost in the shuffle a while back, and getting a reminder of what was simply put it into perspective for me.

[pianokantzart]

Rewatched the Mario Movie again. The beginning where the bros are in Brooklyn is so intriguing to me...like...why tf are they so short??

Since Luigi is the taller of the two, I compared his heights to others the most, like- are the tables in america usually at your elbows? Are the sinks that tall? Luigi passed a waitress whilst he was walking to Spike, she taller than him.

Not to mention Mario- the man jumped through a car window....how?? Spike lifted him up as if he was nothing. Either he's tall af or the bros are just short af.

I love it. Short Kings

Thank you for this! There are so many fan depictions of Luigi where he's tall and thin, but in actuality (or at least in the movie canon) he's pretty short and tubby? he's just not as short and tubby as his brother.

But gosh dang is the world big compared to those two.

Look at this: the kitchen sink goes up to their shoulders!

With Spike, it's definitely a situation of "unusually big man positioned next to an unusually small man," making for a borderline-comical size difference.

No wonder Luigi is so anxious, Spike is beefed out and freaking huge, even next to the average average New Yorker. Meanwhile the bros are dwarfed by their own vehicle. Mario is sitting up straight in this picture, and even then his head barely peeks above the steering wheel:

Bathroom sinks normally do NOT go up to your chest, not even in America. I'm 5'5 and my bathroom sink only goes to my hips. How small are these guys???

And let us never forget that Mario needs a footstool to just sit comfortably on the edge of his bed.

Short kings. Tiny, tiny little fellows. I love it.

[passionateseadruid]

Snake King's bride 4

The announcement

⚠️CONTENT WARING: THERE WILL BE SOME MENTIONS OF PERIODS THIS CHAPTER! IT'S NOT THE WHOLE CHAPTER I'LL MARK WERE IT IS SO IF ANYONE IS UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT YOU CAN JUST SKIP. IT'S NOTHING GRAFFIC BUT I UNDERSTAND IF IT MIGHT MAKE SOME OF YOU UNCOMFORTABLE! ALSO FORCED KISSING FROM HERE ON OUT!⚠️ Sometimes I need to write shit for myself okay!

Two weeks had past since you'd met Charlie and Renesmee and her wife (Nina) had started to work for you. Renesmee had become a maid to you. Waking you up, helping you pick out your outfit, and she and Nina would have breakfast with you the days Lucifer didn't make you breakfast.

Nina was a tall succubus. She had cotton candy pink skin and hot pink hair, and her horns resembled a heart but they pointed outward. Nina wore a slick leather outfit with a bulletproof vest and forearm and shin pads. For a succubus Nina wasn't particularly curvy but she was very tall, 7 feet tall in fact. You didn't exactly make the best first impression with her because the first thing you said was "Dang where did the WNBA hide you?"

Other than the scowl she had on her face she was always cordial at breakfast. And she seemed to get along well enough with Pluto the head of Lucifer's security.

////////////////////////////////////////

WARNING PERIOD CONTENT AHEAD!

One morning you awoke in a pool of your own blood with a splitting pain in your abdomen.

"I'm dying." You mumbled.

"DARLING WHAT'S WRONG?" Lucifer bursts in with a puff of red smoke. He sees you on the bed dark red, almost black, on the sheets. He was in his normal outfit, minus the hat, jacket and cane.

"I'm so glad I used your old shirt as my pajama's last night." You mumbled and got up. "Did- Charlie is half angel."

"Yes?"

"But then again Lilith was human wasn't she? Well you do know what a period is. Do you have anything to deal with this?"

"Oh your uh- I'll have someone clean up the sheets and blankets. How about I run a bath for you and make you some food?" 

"I'll go run a bath and if you decide to make me food you can have Renesmee or Styx deliver it."

"Nonsense! And let them see your body, especially before I get to? Unthinkable. Why are you so mean to me?"

"You're the one who caused this asshole.

"Well now we know when you're ovulating, next month I can take care of this problem for you~" You rush to the bathroom and lock the door. "Think about it! For nine months you would get to eat whatever you wanted and you wouldn't have to deal with a period~"

"Please just get me some pain meds and pads!"

Before you appeared a light pink bottle and a glass. Outside the door you hear a big thud and when you crack the door you see packets of every type of hygiene product you might need. Tampons, pad with and without wings, thin and thick. You name it it was in there.

"At least he's not asking me what size pussy I wear." You rolled your eyes.

(A/n: That's so Adam core, I miss him so much. ;-;)

////////////////////////////////////////

OKAY IT'S OVER

You get out of the tub and wrap a towel around you and step into your room to change into some sweatpants and a zipper hoodie.

"You uh... you look comfy." You quickly turn around and see Lucifer standing in the doorway, pancakes in his hands. His cheeks were even more red then the clown circles he has.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"I-I didn't see anything! Really! You just look so comfy. I never got to see Lilith in anything that didn't show off her curves so seeing my bride to be in something that looks so soft is... different. A good different for sure! Can I... can I have a hug please? I just want to feel how soft it is."

"No."

He rolls his eyes. He walks over to a little mahogany table between the bed and the bathroom. Couches on either side. "You know, I don't get you. I've given you everything you could ask for and more. But you don't seem to care. You just sit around in the library or in your room all day. You're not trying to get to know me like you claim. And another thing, I know that you're not traditional. I may not know what your reason for telling these lies is but I know when you lie."

'That's right. One of his epithets is the father of lies.'

"Thank you for what you've done for me this morning. But I'd like to be left alone." 

"As you wish darling." He takes his leave. 

Nina and Renesmee walked in and you sat on one of the couches to eat the pancakes that Lucifer made for you. Renesmee cleaned up the room and you looked at her. "Hey do you need any help?"

"Miss please we go through this every day. I'm your maid, and I'm sure the king would prefer if you didn't lift a finger."

"I don't care what the king says. I don't want you to overwork yourself."

"I'm fine miss. I'm much more equipped to be a maid than my position in my old job. I'm quick and I like rolling around on the janitor cart."

"I still feel bad. I've never had a maid in my life. On top of that the king is okay with this unfair social system where Imps are looked down upon simply because of how they were born. I'm not going to participate in that just because it's how the way things are."

"Ahem!" Styx Calls from the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt but the king has sent some files over regarding the Halloween ball that will be held at the end of the month. He also sent a note. 'Sorry to drop this on you doll but Lilith was usually the one to handle planning the events we hosted. I've sent over everything we have regarding past years, please see to it by the end of the day and if you could select one of the couples costumes I've chosen for us to wear.' "

You took the files from them and looked through them. "Thank you Styx... here this is the costume I want." You hand a photo to them and start looking through the other files. You spend the rest of the day getting it ready, with the help of Renesmee and Nina of course. Ordering decoration, hiring a caterer, hiring temporary staff to help attendants, renting furniture, booking a band, and making a guest list.

"Do you guys think they'll play monster mash?" You ask the women.

"I don't know what that is, miss." Renesmee shook her head.

"Human music my love." Nina said monotonously.

"What do you think you two will wear?"

"Oh! uh..." Renesmee looked away bashfully.

"We're not coming." Nina said in the same tone.

"What? Why?" You asked disappointed.

"We get one night off we're not spending it at work." Nina glared at you.

"Okay, you don't have to come. I just thought it would be fun to have you two there." You dropped the issue.

////////////////////////////////////////

At the end of the month you (unwillingly) got ready for the party. You put on a short red dress with a sweetheart neckline and an under bust corset, along with a small white waist apron. Several stylists crowd around you. Lucifer had cast an illusion on you earlier that day to transform you identically to how you looked the day you went to the mall with him. One of the stylists curled your hair, one worked on your nails, one worked on your make-up (applying bright red lipstick and such) and the last was supervising and communicating with Lucifer's stylists.

"No Sharron! I told you we cannot compromise on the ears. Madam Rouge personally made these designs, she's going to be there tonight, and if everything is not to her liking she is going to have a fit.

...

Well the king should have thought about that before he ordered it.

...

If he thinks it embarrassing maybe HE should have picked out the costume.

...

That's not my problem, Sharron. Madam Rogue isn't going to accept excuses, especially not "He was trying to make her more comfortable".

...

Like I JUST SAID Sharron. If the king thinks the faux fur ears are itchy he has to deal with it.

...

I don't care if he's the king Sharron! Fine if you're being a pussy I'll deal with it. Put him on the phone."

"I can deal with it ma'am."

"Would you? Thank you sweetheart, you're such a gem." She mutes the phone for a second. "Keep this between you and me, I prefer you over Lilith. That lazy bitch would NEVER have dealt with His Majesty when he's having one of his temper tantrums." You take the phone and un mute him as she keeps rambling. "He's worse than Vox and Val I swear. I don't care what Velvette says, that bitch is a liar, or she gives herself too much credit."

(A/n: Velvette and Vox! My BBGs❤️ Fuck Valentino! he's a piece of💩)

"Hi." You say into the unmuted receiver. "How are you?"

"Hi Darling! Everything is fine but the ears and gloves are kind of itchy. I'm glad that Rogue didn't insist on something weird for the tail like a-"

"Okay! Okay! That's enough. Look I know it might be uncomfortable but it's just for one night."

"I want a kiss for being good then."

"Fine. I'll see you in five'"

"Bye Darling~"

About an hour into the night you left Lucifer talking to some of his friends to go find some food. He wore all gray with wolf ears, claws, and a tail (attached to a belt; a tight leather one-piece with a faux fur collar; and some boots. You brought your red hood over your face to try to ward of lingering eyes trying to catch a peak at Lucifer's new bitch.

You looked back to the couple that he was talking to. An Imp almost his height with a green jester cap and a black and white stripped suit; paired with a tall demon with three faces dressed in a big ruffled red dress that had an open shirt in the front with pants.

You wandered around, looking at other people's costumes and trying to find the snack bar. That Madam Rouge lady had dressed up as Glenda from the wizard of Oz. There was a guy with a TV head who was dressed up like batman in the corner making out with a tall guy dressed up as the Joker. With a girl dressed up as Harley Quinn filming the whole thing.

You looked away and saw Charlie in a Green shirt with a big M on it and a matching tutu and bow and a girl next to her with gray skin and white hair dressed identically but in brown.

You wanted to make your way over to them but as soon as Charlie saw you she ran. You followed her to try and explain yourself. To try and see if she could get you out of Hell. 

"That's her Vaggie!"

"Hun calm down."

"Dad's breaking all the rules for a woman he just met!"

"We don't know that."

"Vaggie! She's human! Living human souls aren't allowed in either of the afterlife's. My mom had to be turned into the first Succubus to even survive in Hell. This is breaking so many conventions. If he makes a deal for a soul he has to devour the person's soul or kill them and drag them to hell. He has a living human with him!"

'He certainly wants to devour me but not in the way you think Charlie.' you think.

"Maybe it's a misunderstanding. You could ask him."

"How can I ask him about her after I blew up at him!? How could he take a girl so young to be his wife? Vaggie she's so young she could be my grand kid!"

"Yeah but you've been alive for thousands of years Charlie. I don't think normal rules apply here."

"I just... wish that she had more time to experience independence before being thrust into this."

"He seems happy." This Vaggie girl said.

"I suppose. And I want him to be happy. He deserves to be happy. And she did invite us. Maybe she wants this. Okay. I'll go apologize to dad and tell him he has my blessing.

'Abort mission! Abort Mission!' You turn and run. You run so far away from the ball room you realize you've found yourself at the guest bathrooms.

"Wow! Hello cutie~" you turn around and see a man dressed as a vampire. "May I just say I love the costume! You're Luci's girl huh? What made you two want to be little red ridding hood and the big bad wolf."

"I felt it fitting. Him being a predator and me being his victim."

"Okay that turned dark real quick. Sold your soul to him huh?"

"No. I was sacrificed, by someone I thought was my friend."

"Oof. That's tough."

"I want to get away from him so badly." You confess. "I'm tired of him love bombing me steady."

"Maybe I can help. The names Agamemnon! I'm an up and coming overlord of Hell You sell your soul to me and I'll make sure you never have to talk to him again." He holds out his hand.

"Deal." You take his hand without thinking about it for even a second.

He takes off your cape, draping it over his arm and wraps his coat around you.

He led you through the ballroom toward the exit, and just when you are at the desolate foyer you two are blinded by a bright flash and when the light fades you look to Agamemnon and see that he is no longer standing nest to you, a pile of dust in his place, covering your red cape. You look back and see a seething Lucifer. His horns popped out, a small flame burning in between them, a halo surrounding his horns. His eyes were red, and he has puffing out smoke from his huffs.

He walked up to you and ripped off the coat burning it to ashes in an instant. He pulled the red cape back on you and grabbed on your wrist. "How DARE you! You sold your soul to a filthy SINNER? I've tried to be good. I've tried to seduce you. I've let you have your space. I've spoiled you. I was willing to give you time to fall in love with me. And yet apparently it hasn't been good enough for you. You know what? No more! You will be my wife, you will have my children, and you will LOVE ME!!" He pulled you back to the ball room. "If you say anything in there to ANYONE I'll kill your entire fucking family." He burst in and pulled you up on stage with him. "Attention everyone!" He smiled and continued. "We have an exciting announcement for you all! My beautiful bride and I are getting married in six months!" Your blood ran cold. For trying to run away he cut your time to escape in half. He knows what you're trying to do, but he needs time to prepare a wedding. He just got back into Charlie's good graces so he can't rush a wedding and mess things up.

For the rest of the night You stood next to him, his arm gripping your waist in a death grip, getting congrats and passive aggressively asking for an invitation.

"Hi..." Charlie came up to you and her dad. "I know that we didn't start off on the wrong foot, I've apologized to dad but I'd like to apologize to you as well."

"No that's okay. I grew up on the evil stepmom trope. I wouldn't blame you if you tried to shoot me with a shotgun but accidentally shot your dad and tried to frame me. I get it."

"Okay?"

"Have you never seen legally blonde?"

"No?"

"Oh, sorry to spoil the ending then."

"Anyway, I'm happy to have you join the family." She pulled you in for a hug. You hugged back as to not piss off Lucifer any more than you already had.

After the party Lucifer carried you to his room. you protested profusely and he threw you onto the bed. He held you down and snapped his fingers as your costume swapped into that of one of your night gowns. Your costume laid forgotten on his bed floor. He threw off his clothes and stayed in his boxers. "Don't get this twisted. This is not fun sexy times. I'm boing to hold you here tonight to make sure you understand that YOU. ARE. MINE."

"okay..." You nodded obediently. He pulled the covers over you both and wrapped his arm around you. His chest to four back.

"Goodnight doll. I hope you have sweet dreams of me~"

You said nothing as you cried yourself to sleep.

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Ruby: Penny!

Penny: Ruby! You weren’t in your rooms when I came by. Did something happen?

Ruby: It definitely did. We rented out a hotel room because the beds at the academy are too small.

Penny: Ruby! I want details!

Ruby: *giggles*

Weiss: Not too many details, I hope.

Penny: Of course not. Just the bare minimum. I live vicariously through Ruby.

Ruby: Penny! You don’t say things like that even if they are true.

Penny: You already knew that. Or at least I thought you did.

Ruby: There are principles to the thing!

Penny: What do you think Weiss? Jaune?

Jaune: Girl talk. None of my business.

Penny: Of course it’s your business. You and Weiss are most of what we talk about. How could it not be?

Jaune: The girl talk is none of my business even if I’m the subject of some of it.

Weiss: I never would have pegged Penny as a gossip.

Penny: Is that what I am?

Ruby: Well we have our mission so you two play nice.

Jaune: Sure thing sweetheart.

Weiss: If she’s sweetheart then what am I?

Jaune: Ice Qu-

Weiss: If you finish that your very next words will be ‘you punched me in the groin.’

Jaune: Princess just because I don’t say it…

Weiss: *smacks him with the back of her hand gently*

Jaune: No? Didn’t like princess either? I’ll come up with something. Ruby is easier to give petnames to.

Weiss: Maybe if you didn’t use ‘princess’ sarcasticly. You ruined it.

Jaune: Dang it. So close.

Weiss: Gods…

Penny: Is this how you flirt? Because I like it. It’s cute.

Jaune: Only when she lets me. Weiss is a tough nut to crack.

Weiss: Flatterer.

Ruby: Who would want to be tough?

Weiss: Who would want to be easy?

Ruby: Because it’s sweet when he tries. It’s sweet when you try too.

Weiss: He better do more than try.

Ruby: Oh psh! You weren’t giving him that this morning.

Weiss: *blushes* That’s different.

Ruby: Not that different. You were letting him have you for breakfast.

Weiss: Ruby!

Ruby: What? It’s just us girls.

Jaune: And me…

Ruby: Yeah but you were there. Weren’t you. And it’s just Penny. I tell her basically everything.

Jaune: How much is basically everything because some things should stay just between us girls.

Ruby: You’re really hung up on that.

Jaune: Kinda…

Ruby: It’s just girl talk. You know?

Jaune: Penny what’s the most risque thing you and Ruby have talked about?

Ruby: *sends Penny a pleading look*

Penny: Well we once talked about the size of your-

Weiss: Okay! Okay. The three of you are children.

Penny: I’m four.

Jaune: *laughs and high fives Penny*

[misc-obeyme]

weird question but do we... know if the demons are fertile at all??? obviously they have sex drives,,, but do we hear of any kids? i mean if it comes down to it adopting luke is always an option. just going to have to wrestle him from Simon if you're with anyone other than him

🐈‍⬛

Note: discussion of fertility and having kids (just in case)

Hello there, 🐈‍⬛ anon!

As far as I know, the only demon kids we hear about are Diavolo, Mephistopheles, and presumably Mephisto's little brother.

Diavolo tells us that his mother died after giving birth to him, so I think it's safe to assume that demons are fertile to some extent.

Of course, there's always the fan favorite theory that Dia's mom was a human or an angel. Which would mean at the very least that demons are fertile enough to have children with other species. So even if this turns out to be canon, I think it's still safe to assume demons are fertile.

We hear a lot less about Mephisto and his brother, but the brother certainly sounds like he's still considered a kid. And Mephisto says something about being born to be Dia's friend, so generally I think most of us imagine them as having been kids together.

Due to this, I think it's perfectly reasonable for any of the demons to have kids. It seems that it may be difficult, though. Because if demons could have kids as easily (and sometimes accidentally) as humans, then likely there would be a lot more demon kids than we hear about. (And possibly a lot more demons in general.)

I like to think that the demon population is much smaller than it is for humans (by like a lot 'cause dang there are a lot of humans). I think of it as like maybe being around 8 million in the city proper (like the size of New York City). And then the rest is more scattered and in a lot of less populated cities and such. Maybe around 20 million? And some of that would also be non demons, since they talk about vampires and whatnot else. And also some of those are gonna be those small type demons that sound like they're fairy sized.

Anyway, all of this is to say that if demons are popping out kids at the same rates as humans for all their long lives, there'd be WAY more of them. Like the whole world times five maybe. I dunno, it sounds like the live for thousands upon thousands of years, but still might only have one or two kids that whole time.

So they either have amazing contraception or it's actually rather difficult for them to actually have a child.

Then there's the question of how demons might be created from magic - whether exploding out of a different demon's emotions Satan-style or possibly just magical spells that allow one to create a child.

In the case of MC, I think it's possible. They might need to use some magic to make it happen (depending on how easy it is for any of the other demons to impregnate MC/get impregnated by MC), but it definitely sounds like something that can happen.

I like the idea of MC just adopting random demon kids, though. 'Cause you're right, you'll have to wrestle Simeon for Luke lol!

[thewriterowl]

not me trying to see din and luke's canon size difference through comparing their size next to R5D5 (because the dang writers never actually put them side by side which is a sin in my opinion)

So a few things to do for the comparison:

Din is apparently like an inch taller than Han

2) Luke's height can seem to vary. I follow what a general google search provides me which states he's 5'6 (in my heart that is as tall as he gets) On one of Mark Hamill's silly signature cards and his apparent actor resume, he's listed as 5'7 (while wearing healed boots)

3) Din's height seems to be Pedro's height which is about 5'11 + an inch or two for the helmet

But just looking at that gif?? Luke may come up to Din's shoulder :D

AND THAT'S JUST THE HEIGHT

because while Pedro, depending on his role, can be buff to lean, Din is continuously shown to be rather thic and Luke is continuously shown to be rather lean. So, I think how Pedro looked for his role as Joel is really close to the body type Din is show-cased to have based on the armor (the armor does bulk him up a bit but...

the man clearly fills it out in many areas to show that he is built to match the armor and vice-versa; this character is for sure denser than, say, Pedro's Javi)

With Luke;

Being a lot more slender (and this being one of his buffier looks)

So, i end my presentation with: ENJOY THE SIZE DIFFERENCE CAUSE I KNOW I AM

[littletrippyyhippyy]

I promised more aged up Neteyam x Plus Size Reader content so here it is! I just love it so dang much 💙

I honestly didn’t mean for it to turn out this way but uhh here it is… this one is similar to the first but more in depth I should say…

“So soft, my love - absolutely perfect” Neteyam said lovingly as he laid his head on your plump belly - his hands roaming anywhere and everywhere they could.

You giggled, playing with his hair as he continued. “Teyam, you’ve been at this for hours. Don’t you plan on stopping soon?” He raised his head up - looking at you blankly. “You’re so funny, y/n” He laid his head right back down - causing you to huff.

Out of nowhere Neteyam got up, crawling on top of you. Your eyes went wide - frightened by the large Navi man above you. “I swear Neteyam if you fall on me - you’ll be planning my funeral”

“Hey! I’m not that heavy!” You looked at him with your brow raised. “Okay maybe a little heavy but don’t worry my love - I can keep myself up” He winked after his last sentence, causing your face to go red.

Neteyam brought his face down, giving you a long kiss. He looked back at you - his yellow eyes looking at you softly “Y/n, I would like to feel more of you - if you will allow me to” you turned your head - trying to figure out what he meant.

It finally clicked - making you realize he wants to touch you where your clothes hid the rest of you. “Up here, Teyam? Or?” You were slow - face still red as you point to your two different body parts. “May I touch you here first?” He slowly brought his hand up - pointing to your large boobs. “If you would like”

You motioned for him to get off of you - letting you sit up so you could take your top off. Your heart was racing and brain fuzzy - not holding back for him. He was amazed at what he saw - mentally telling himself to take it slow. Sitting on the grass - Neteyam picked you up and set you on his lap. He ran one of his hands through your hair - moving it down towards your right boob.

You held your breath as he touched you - this being the first time he’s gone farther than usual. Neteyam squeezed it lightly, smiling as he looked at you in the eyes. “Just as soft as I imagined - just like the rest of you”

You were burning at this point, falling underneath Neteyams touching spell. By mistake, you let a whimper out - causing him to stop touching you. “My y/n, what was that?” He knew what it was, but still wanted to tease you. “Oh come on Neteyam” you begged.

He placed his hand back down, grazing the top of your nipple slowly with his large thumb. You bit your bottom lip - trying to hold in any noise that may come out of you. “Please” you said - barely a whisper. Neteyam kept going - only paying attention to your body and none of your cries.

His touch made you ache below. You were to the point where you wanted to jump onto him - cry out for him to do something to help you. “Teyam, please baby” you whined once again. He quickly shushed you, laying you back down onto the grass. “Just let me touch you, my y/n. I want to feel all of you. Can you lay there and let me?”

You nodded at him quickly - closing your eyes as he climbed back on top of you. Neteyam dipped his head down, pressing his nose to your neck as he inhaled sharply. “So addicting” he said lowly. Neteyam planted kisses all over your body as he went down. “This lovely body all for me. You are like a dream, my love. I love the way you feel”

Never in your life did you think you’d find someone to love you like Neteyam does - bigger than other girls, but the day you met him was like a gift from Mother Eywa. His little human all to himself. He was never letting you go.

I feel like I left y’all on a cliff-hanger I’m so sorry 💀

[natsuki-bakery]

⁎˚ ఎ CG The Postal Dude ໒ ˚⁎

Hi! If I remember correctly you do one shots? If so could I possibly get a one shot of Postal 3 Dude based off of the Caregiver headcannons I previously requested of him?

The Postal Dude wasn’t exactly known for his soft side. Dang, he wasn’t even sure he had a side that wasn’t drenched in sarcasm, violence, or a grim sense of humor. Yet, here he was, standing in the middle of his cluttered, half-destroyed apartment, staring down at the kid who had somehow ended up in his care

In the mess of avoiding gunfire, doing questionable jobs, and trying not to lose what little sanity he had left, the last thing he expected was to end up with an age regressor clinging to his leg, looking at him like he was their last hope

The kid didn’t say much, just looked up at him with wide, frightened eyes. They were clutching a tattered stuffed bunny, the kind you’d expect to see in a thrift store bin, but to them, it seemed like the most precious thing in the world

Postal Dude sighed, running a hand through his greasy hair "Alright, alright, kid. Calm down. I’m not gonna hurt you"

He wasn’t exactly a master of comforting words, but his tone was gentler than usual, well, as gentle as it could be for him. The kid relaxed just a little, still trembling but not looking like they’d bolt at any second

"Let’s get you settled," he muttered, more to himself than to the kid. His apartment was a disaster zone, with pizza boxes, empty cans, and who-knows-what-else scattered around. He kicked some of it aside, clearing a spot on the couch...

"Sit there, okay?" He pointed to the cleared space. The kid hesitated before climbing up, curling into a ball as they clutched their bunny tighter

He paced the small living room, trying to figure out what the heck to do next. Taking care of someone wasn’t exactly in his skill set. His usual interactions involved dodging bullets, throwing Molotovs, or flipping off anyone who crossed him. But this was different. This was…innocent.

"Uh, you want something to eat?" He asked, peeking into the fridge. There wasn’t much, just a few cans of beer, some expired milk, and a moldy sandwich he didn’t remember buying. The kid shook their head, still silent.

Great, he thought. This is just great. He grabbed a half-empty bag of chips from the counter and tossed it over. "Here, munch on this if you get hungry"

Postal Dude grabbed a cigarette, lighting it up with a flick of his lighter. He took a long drag, trying to calm his nerves. The kid’s eyes followed the cigarette, and he could see the curiosity there.

"Not for you, kid" he said quickly, moving to the window to smoke. The last thing he needed was to deal with a coughing fit.

The sun was setting outside, casting an orange glow over the town. For a moment, there was an eerie kind of peace. The usual chaos seemed distant, muffled by the walls of the apartment

He glanced back at the kid, who was now watching a cockroach scuttle across the floor with a mix of fascination and fear. The sight almost made him smile. Almost.

"Listen, kid" he said, stubbing out the cigarette. "I don’t know how you ended up here, and I’m not exactly the nurturing type. But I’m not gonna let anything happen to you, alright ?"

The kid looked up at him with those big, trusting eyes, and for the first time, he felt something close to…responsibility. It was uncomfortable, like wearing shoes that were two sizes too small. But it wasn’t entirely bad

"Let’s just keep it quiet tonight, yeah ?" he suggested, pulling a raggedy blanket from a pile of laundry and tossing it over the kid. They nodded, snuggling into the couch.

The Postal Dude sat down in the armchair across from them, rubbing his temples. This was definitely not how he’d planned his evening, but somehow, it didn’t seem like the worst thing in the world.

As the apartment grew darker, the sounds of the outside world fading into the background, he allowed himself to relax just a little. The kid was safe, at least for tonight, and that was enough.

If you're in the basic criteria , are DSMP fans, vivziep0p fans , h0tel/h3lluva b0ss fans, Owl h0use fans, St4r butterfly fans, Ghibli fans, ddlg/abdl blogs, nsfw/k!nk blogs, anti-agere blogs, or anti Christians/Christianity blogs : just dont interact !

[thewildwaffle]

The Gardener - Part 8

Thanks to A_R_K on archiveofourown for this prompt about the uncanny valley.

Part 1&2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

In retrospect, Nipti supposed the situation at hand was inevitable. He’d been taking a break while working on the support beams for some vigbri climbing vines when he noticed the strange ship sitting near the edge of his gardens, right up against the wild tree line. That was odd. When had that landed? It’s not like he was right next to the edge of his lands, but he was certainly close enough that the fact that he hadn’t heard the ship come in was strange. What’s more, when visitors to his gardens came by, they usually landed their ships next to his large workshop. Deciding that the support beams he’d spent the last quarter of the cycle on were going to keep standing and doing their job, Nipti decided he’d go and intercept his latest visitors before they could trample anything. If they’d just landed near the dang workshop like everyone is supposed to, they’d come across the posted rules and instructions that Marley had set up. Then, Nipti could otherwise ignore them unless they specifically needed something from him. Oh well. As much as he enjoyed not interacting with people other than Marley, he enjoyed making sure his gardens were treated with the respect they deserved from guests. It took a while to find the new guests. They’d already wandered a bit from their ship. Nipti looked around their landing area. Nothing seemed to be disturbed. Thank the stars, their ship must have some great landing gear that didn’t create branch-breaking and petal-tearing gusts during descent. Perhaps that was also why Nipti didn’t notice the ship’s approach in the first place. The guests themselves had wandered off and were slowly meandering through the gardens, staying on the walking paths, Nipti appreciatively noticed. There were three of them. Two of them stared silently at him as he approached. The third was crouched over, looking intently at a plant that immediately sent Nipti’s alarm bells off.

“Don’t touch that!” He called out. The crouching guest turned to stare at him silently like its companions. Nipti was going to say that the plant the visitor was about to touch was quite delicate, and depending on their species, could be dangerous, but the words froze in his mouth before he could. Ah. He’d thought something like this would happen eventually. Before him stood three humans. They looked different than Marley. Taller. Paler. Their eyes were set a little deeper in their faces. There was something else that seemed different, but Nipti couldn’t quite pin down what it was. He shook his head. Of course they looked different than Marley! He may not be an expert on humans, but even he knew humans came in all kinds of shapes, sizes, colors, and dispositions. Still, he was worried of what Marley’s reaction might be to other humans arriving at the gardens. Would Marley be standoffish and territorial? Or maybe excited? They’d both been working on Marley’s piece of junk ship whenever they had the time or parts, but with other humans showing up, would Marley decide to go with them? It was something Nipti knew had been a possibility, but one he kept pushing from his mind whenever it came up. Not anymore, he supposed. Whatever Marley decided to do would be their own decision, and Nipti would do his best to be supportive of whatever his friend decided. “Sorry, that plant there might not be dangerous to humans, but as the gardener here, I ask that you not disturb anything while visiting,” he finally broke the silence. The three smiled at him simultaneously. Nipti tried not to shiver. Marley was always mindful of not baring teeth while smiling to not appear predatory or threatening. These three were not so inclined. Nipti wondered if their diet was different than Marley’s, as their teeth appeared to be sharper. “My name’s Garbon Nipti. I noticed you’d just arrived and thought I’d come and see if there’s anything I can do for you. There are maps available near my workshop there if you’re looking to study a specific garden or specimen.” Nipti gestured to the area in question. “We are just perusing,” one of the humans that had been staring unblinkingly at him as he approached said. Their voice was level and somewhat monotonous. Very different than Marley’s bouncing cadences. Nipti waited for a moment for them to introduce themselves as he had, but they remained silent and still. He stood there as long as he could until the uncomfortableness of it all became too much. “Okay, well, if you need anything, I’ll be working nearby.” He would have also mentioned that they could also get help from Marley, but a part of him hoped they didn’t cross paths. His stomach tied itself into knots. He shouldn’t hope that. He knew he shouldn’t, but he was so afraid that if they did, then Marley would leave with them. Nipti frowned and shook his head as he started walking back to the vigbri climbing vines. No. He shouldn’t be so selfish. He’d always known other humans would visit his gardens eventually. Their kind wandered all over the place! “If Marley does want to go,” he said to himself under his breath, “then I need to be supportive. No matter how much… how much I’d miss...”

He was so lost in thought that he nearly ran over Marley. “Woah, hey Nipti!” Marley laughed and acted as if they’d lost balance from the run-in. Nipti was significantly shorter than the human, so he knew it was just an act. Marley stood back up straight and looked Nipti up and down. “You okay? You look like you’re lost.” Nipti nearly scoffed. “Lost? I walk this path several times a day. How could I be lost?” “Lost in thought,” Marley corrected. “Like you’re physically here, trying to run me over and whatnot, but your mind is a million segments away.” “Oh,” was all Nipti could respond. He supposed he had been rather preoccupied thinking about the new guests to the garden. Should he tell Marley? He was starting to second-guess himself now. If he didn’t bring them up and Marley didn’t cross paths with them, maybe his friend might never even know they were here, let alone leave with them? The gardens were big, so it wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities. Would that make him a bad friend? Was it his responsibility to tell Marley, just in case? While Nipti struggled with his options, Marley waited patiently with a cheerful smile. That did it. Nipti decided he needed to stick to his original resolve. “Marley, there’s some new guests that just landed by the wild tree line.” Marley’s head tilted a bit. “Why would they land there when I just repainted the landing pad last decacycle? Are they causing trouble? Need me to muscle ‘em outa here?” “Uh, no. No,” Nipti stammered slightly and shook his head. “I… actually, I think you should meet them. They… they’re human. They’re just back there, from where I was coming from.” Marley’s face lit up. “Oh for real? Yeah, I’d love to! I wonder where they’re originally from. It feels like giga-cycles since I’ve seen other humans. Come on, let’s go meet them!” With the “let’s,” Nipti grudgingly followed behind his chipper friend, trying to not let his glumness show and damper the mood. Life, he supposed, would just go back to normal before Marley came. The old workload, the old quiet, the old solitude. Well, maybe it wouldn’t be the same normal. He had gotten much better and bolder at dealing with rude or destructive visitors, having seen and followed Marley’s example. The habit of “jerry-rigging” different contraptions and systems had also rubbed off in some cases when proper solutions weren’t always available. And if Nipti were honest, the solitude would perhaps feel a bit more like… loneliness.

They were getting close to where Nipti had left the new garden guests. They must have wandered a bit down into the Quilb orchard. Nipti reflexively tensed. Those orchards had some very rare specimens, some of which native folklore claimed had mystical properties. Nipti didn’t put much stock into the latter, but he still prized those trees and the flower buds that were about half a decacycle from blooming. “I hope they’re still staying on the paths,” Nipti muttered, mostly to himself. Marley came to a stop at the overlook of the orchard. Nipti stopped as well, scanning the area. He quickly spotted the three figures through the foliage and pointed them out. “There they are.” Marley didn’t move. “Uh,” Nipti was sure his friend had seen them. They were hard to miss. Marley was staring right at them. After a moment, Nipti put a hand on Marley’s arm. “Is something wrong?” Maybe this whole pause and staring thing was some strange human custom. If it was, it looked like it was working. The figures were now starting to move closer and he could see the pale faces with their deep-set eyes staring back up at them.

Before Nipti could even register what was happening, Marley had scooped him up, turned, and ran back the way they had come. Nipti wasn’t that much smaller than a fully grown human, but Marley threw him up over the shoulder and sprinted away like he weighed nothing. Nipti’s arms scrambled on Marley’s back, trying to get leverage to steady himself enough to hold himself up to see just WHAT THE FREWAN WAS GOING ON?! “Marley!” Nipti cried out and nearly got smacked in the head by an overgrown bush as the human in question banked hard on a sharp turn. If Marley heard him in the mad scramble, there was no response given besides heavy breathing and a jostle as Nipti’s weight was readjusted mid-stride. Nipti looked back behind them. The other humans weren’t following, or at least, it didn’t look like they were. He couldn’t see them, but that didn’t mean they weren’t giving chase. But why would they? Why would there be a need to chase? Why was Marley running? Marley only slowed down once they reached a utility shed Only then did it occur to Nipti - humans have a stereotype of being foolhardily brave. Whatever his friend had seen from those other humans had really spooked Marley. The type of adrenaline that comes from being mortally afraid started seeping into the corners of Nipti’s brain. He said nothing more as they ran into the shed and shut the doors. Neither said a word as they bunkered down into the best hiding spots they could manage. Marley took a spot somewhat near the door, under a small window, and would periodically and discreetly peek out to check if they’d been followed. Thankfully, there was yet to be any indication that that was the case.

It felt like an eternity before Nipti finally found his voice again. “Why were we running from those other humans?” Marley kept staring out the window, scanning the area silently for a moment longer. “Those weren’t humans.” “What?” Nipti frowned. Not human? He hadn’t really met other humans besides Marley, but it’s not like they’re super easy to mix up with other species. “Well then, what are they?” Marley’s gaze turned from the window to look back at him, confused and thinking. “I… I don’t know.” “They looked human.” “Yeah,” Marley whispered and said nothing more. They sat watching and listening. The silence was starting to get to Nipti. He felt like he was being hunted, and he needed to do something besides just wait to be found. It was only now that Nipti noticed how the small hairs on Marley’s arms and neck were standing straight up. “Hey, come on, please. What’s going on? Do we need to call for help?” Marley took a shaky breath and nodded. Nipti reached for his pack and had a small moment of terror as he reached in and couldn’t immediately find his comm. After shuffling around some twist ties and a pair of shears, he found it in a side pocket. He quickly messaged the closest neighbor he knew. Thankfully, they messaged back right away that they’d come over. She was a large biet, so hopefully if those humans-that-weren’t-humans were still around, they’d be intimidated away by her muscular bulk and large teeth.

It took a while for the neighbor to arrive, making for a long and tense wait. Even though she was the closest in proximity, Nipti’s gardens were so sprawling, that she was still quite a distance away. Nipti nearly jumped when his comm sounded an alert of an incoming call. “Hello?” Nipti noticed a bit of a tremble in his voice. “Hey Nipti, it’s Glenna,” the biet’s voice sounded a bit tinny on the old comm’s speaker setting. “I’m here. I don’t see anything out of order, at least I don’t think I do. There’s a small ship over here by your main warehouse, but I’m pretty sure it belongs to the family of duibs that I saw meandering around a few mentiks ago. Your gardens are looking great! You’ve expanded a lot since I was here last. Where are you at now?” Nipti took a deep breath. “We’re in a small shed out near the edge of the gardens by the wild tree line. Do you see any ship over there?” “No, there’s nothing out there,” came the response. “Are you okay? You seem a bit shaken up.” “I… I am feeling a bit shaky, yes. Thank you again for coming over. I’ll be over to you soon.” Nipti looked up from the comm device to Marley. Marley looked out the window again then back to Nipti. “They’re gone?” “Apparently. We… we should get out here.” “Yeah.” Nipti had never seen his friend so subdued and skittish. They both walked as if their heads were on swivels as they went together back to the main warehouse.

Despite not wanting to talk too loudly so as to draw attention from any unwelcome, unseen entities, Nipti had to know something. “How did you know they weren’t human? Are you sure they weren’t?” Marley didn’t respond immediately. “I… I’m not sure how I knew, but I just knew. There was something about them that just set me off. It was like they were straight out of the deepest depths of the uncanny valley. Like, they looked almost human, but there was something about them that felt wrong and dangerous.” Marley’s conviction felt strong to Nipti. So they were sure the mystery visitors weren’t human, but he wasn’t sure what the “uncanny valley” was or what that meant. Finally, they started to hear the bright and cheery tones of normal garden visitors. Even though Nipti had always preferred his solitude, he felt a rush of relief at seeing non-”not-human” guests wandering through flower beds and trellises. The relief was even stronger when he finally caught sight of Glenna. Welcoming pleasantries and introductions were polite, but short. Glenna was curious to know more about what was going on. Nipti insisted they go inside for a drink first. Glintsi flower tea for him and Glenna and peppermint for Marley. Recalling the day’s events took only a few minutes. Both Nipti and Glenna shared a particular interest in what Marley had meant by describing the visitors as being “from the uncanny valley.” It wasn’t some geologic location, but a psychological theory that the more something or someone looks human, the cuter humans think they are, up to a point. There was a space somewhere between “almost” and “completely” human that “cuteness” dropped significantly and instead freaked humans out. Usually, it was with robotics and inanimate objects. When it happened with living things, it made the uncanniness so much worse. “Well,” Glenna finished her cup and sat back, “from what I know about humans, you should trust their instincts when they say something is off.” She turned to Marley and smiled. “I know Nipti likes his space and privacy, and I honor that, but I worry about him sometimes. My family and work keep me too busy to really do otherwise anyway. So, I’m glad you’re here. You seem like good company, and with all the visitors coming in and out of the gardens, well, I’m glad he’s not alone.” Marley smiled and agreed.

The rest of the afternoon was filled with more tea and exchanging stories. The sun was nearing the horizon by the time any of them noticed. “Oh, I hadn’t realized it had gotten so late,” Glenna stood up. “I need to get back. I promised my son I’d help him bake some hirtan tarts tonight. If you’d like, I could bring some by tomorrow?” Marley nodded enthusiastically, “Oh yes, thank you. And if you’d like, I could make some dishes I’ve been working on for my little cafe. You can tell me what you think.” “That sounds lovely,” Glenna smiled and started walking toward the door. “It was nice to meet you, Marley. And Nipti, if ever you need help, please don’t be a stranger, you don’t have to do everything all alone, you know.” “That’s what I’m learning,” Nipti returned the smile and bid farewell to Glenna with some additional thanks for coming over.

Nipti waited a few moments once the door was shut before turning back to Marley. “Okay, you’re going to tell me a bit more about the uncanny valley. What the frewan happened in humanity’s past to create a need to know what’s almost-human-but-not-quite?!” Marley blinked and shrugged. “I don’t know.” Nipti waited for more info. Marley looked like they were deep in thought, and needed a bit of time to gather all the thoughts running around their head. “It might have come from hard-wiring in our brains to avoid dead bodies or extreme illnesses? Like, they look human, are human, but something’s obviously wrong and they could be contagious or dangerous. I mean, it’s just a theory, but it does make logical sense to me.” Nipti nodded. It did make sense. “But,” he drawled after a moment of thought, “the visitors today didn’t look like dead bodies. I really thought they were humans. I mean, they looked different than you, but they really looked like they were human?” The unsettled look Marley had earlier that day returned for just a tik. With a shake of the head, Marley stood back up and started gathering up the used tea cups to wash them in the sink. “Listen, I’m not a psychologist, I don’t know why they freaked me out so bad. I don’t know what they were, but I hope I never see them again.” Nipti fully agreed.

[chuckeroo777]

Dungeon Meshi Volume 12 Part 1

We have a doozy today! Things aren't going well, but we have nine whole chapters to hopefully resolve some stuff, so let's see what happens!

Dungeon Meshi: Kabru's no good, very bad day.

Honestly wouldn't mind having a proper chapter of these three having a misadventure.

So... how do you think the anime is gonna handle Flamela (and the queen)? I feel like the obsidian skin could be read very unfavorably by the wrong audience.

I mean, Rin is admittedly a low value target, but Toshiro is prince-adjacent, and Flamela is the primary commander of the elf forces. Then again, nobody but their own squads gives a shit about these two, so...

Hard to believe, though I imagine everyone has slightly different reasons to doubt Laios' abilities.

Poor Doni and Fionil. The world's gone topsy turvy, but they still have to deal with these dang chickens.

This is what you two get for leaving the party. You get to be our baffled side characters for this arc.

So, how exactly does containing a demon work? Did they do something like Thistle, and seal the demon in an object? Did they just collapse the dungeon? Wouldn't that just let the demon slowly rebuild? How does one stop the demon without destroying it?

Or you could just say hello to that Hydra everyone ignored back in chapter 69. Seriously, let my snaky boi play.

Glad everyone is in agreement. Laios is a total weirdo, but he's a pretty great guy. (Also, don't mind Fionil having a secret character arc in the background.)

Flamela has no idea what sort of manga she's fallen into.

Flamela really just wanted an outlet for her frustration, didn't she. Seriously, I have no idea why anyone treats these elves with respect.

Gotta love how creative and cool the monsters in this manga are, and then we have... jack frosts. When I needed an ice monster to maintain an ice prison, I made Ice Vermin. They're scorpions that shoot ice. I make way too many scorpions.

An important image.

Soaring through the air with the greatest of ease.

You greatly overestimate how much of a shit Lycion gives.

I don't know what you're talking about. Deranged lisa frank is an amazing villain aesthetic.

Priorities. And once again, Laios is me with the phylogenetic corrections.

Hmm. If just a few mages can control such a heck-ton of familiars, what's stopping someone from making much bigger more powerful familiars? Why use a swarm of birds when you can have a full-sized dragon?

I also have to question how this thing pecked down a tower. That isn't a real beak. It's just a cluster of birds.

I thought you already knew that Izutsumi. Not the raw parasite thing, the Laios being an idiot thing.

I'm not entirely sure if the logic works out with how familiars work, but it sure is funny!

Ah. I see we finally reached the vore.

Also, gotta love how Marcille's ultimate monster is just sky fish, but beeg.

Looks like this might be a long session! Be back in a bit for chapter 80!