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meimi-haneoka · 1 year ago

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Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Chapter 79: Comments + JP-ENG translation differences

Welcome back to our monthly appointment, CCS fans! This chapter comes right after this month's full moon, the Hunter Moon! (lol yes I will feature the name of the relative full moon till the end of the story). And speaking of the end of the story, I will start this analysis and translation post from the end of the chapter, where I found the confirmation to the rumour that had been going on for hours before the official release on Comic Days:

yes, dear readers, this is not a drill, Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Arc will end with chapter 80, after 7 years of serialization! 🎉�� When *the last chapter* is announced, there's no turning back! No more sudden announcements of extensions! 🥹 But at the moment of writing this post, no mentions have been given about any "epilogue" or extra chapters that might be serialized in the upcoming months leading to the big release of volume 16 on April 1st!

On the translation side, I have to sigh in relief because no major misunderstandings happened in the ENG version, just some minor inaccuracies! I was kinda scared because this chapter is pretty important and complex in itself.

And let me say that what happened in this chapter 79 definitely marks the end of the climax, so I can totally see it ending in next chapter. The chapter tackled some very important thematics regarding the presence of "evil" in this series, that I will talk about extensively in my analysis.

The announcement today made me already a bit nostalgic and sad, but I want to strive hard to accompany myself and all of you towards the end of this arc with excitement and a smile, therefore I won't let myself be prey of the sadness yet and introduce you immediately to the gif of this month, because there's a lot we need to talk about and analyze and we can't waste time!!

This is entirely dedicated to our protagonist and heroine Sakura-chan, because damn, she really slayed this chapter!!! Under the cut to see what miracles she made happen!

The Color Page

My dear readers, after years of countless pleas on my social media, after being let down month after month, CLAMP FINALLY GRANTED ME A COLOR PAGE SOLELY DEDICATED TO KAITO AND AKIHO TOGETHER ON THE SECOND-TO-LAST CHAPTER!! Yaaaay!! Excuse me while I celebrate this event here in my little corner, especially after having a rough month! 🎉🎉🎉 I hope my followers thought of me when they saw it? Like "finally she'll stop asking for it" (breaking news, I'll keep asking for more even after the series is over) 😂 It took them 79 chapters to do so and honestly I'm laughing because....yes, I admit it, I expected another vibe for such an important color page coming after such an important emotional scene in chapter 78, but honestly the first thing I thought when I saw it was "....they had to wait 79 chapters for this? 😧" 😂because it's very very "regular", I think it would've been ok for this to come out long ago. LOL I'm being brutally honest here, I hope no one gets offended, especially because that pet peeve aside, OF COURSE I love this precious color page to bits, and I know under its "normalcy", its got a very important meaning to the both of them.

Akiho and Kaito are depicted together clearly during one of their travels....but the question is, is this from the past? Or the near future? I'd daresay they look the same age they are now, so this might probably be a foreshadowing for the future...? They'll keep travelling the world? But seeing the content of the chapter, this might also be just a call-back to their memories together and everything that they experienced during those travels, tightening their bond. Travelling the world is, after all, really their thing, their element. I really like Kaito's expression, with his usual smile that almost turns into a smirk, he gives off a vibe of being finally free to express his emotions. He looks carefree, and that's really something for him. Akiho, on the other hand, is always so much more expressive than him and you can literally feel the joy and excitement emanating from her delighted expression. Travelling with him makes her happy, so yes, should this be what awaits them in the finale, it's fine by me as long as they're happy (I'm rooting for the other option though, the "stay in Tomoeda with your newfound support network" route).

But as you know, I always have to analyze the color pages a bit deeper, especially when they're about these two. And since I had to keep myself distracted, I made a bit of research. Other than the "travelling" vibe, this illustration gives off also kind of a "vintage" vibe (which is another strong element to Akiho and Kaito). It seems Akiho is dressed in a sleeveless coat with cape and wearing a bonnet fully inspired by those worn by children in the second half of the 1800s, in the Victorian era.

(pic courtesy of Etsy) This is a model from 1896, for example. When I pinpointed the period, I immediately thought "uh, the Victorian era is also the period when Alice in Wonderland came out", although that was more towards the 1860s. I found it really interesting and a nice touch for this illustration with a retro flavor (the suitcase and purse also look kinda vintage).

But another thing that immediately caught my eyes were those cute birds landing on Kaito's shoulder and Akiho's bonnet. I immediately tried to look what kind of birds they are, and it seems like they could really be eastern bluebirds, typical of North America. Searching further, I found out that in several cultures bluebirds are harbinger of happiness and symbols of hope. I couldn't honestly have thought for a more fitting symbolism, for these two. Especially cause birds often are associated with an imagery of freedom, and this is something else that these two need, after being hunted by evil people for so long. They really do look free, in this color page. Also, the presence of the birds in this color page immediately brought me back to the color page of chapter 62, where we can see baby Kaito in a wintery setting, sitting on a lamppost, extending his little hand to a swallow coming to him. Swallows are a symbol of hope and bring a message of "spring is coming", and continuing from that message of hope, of "spring is coming for you too", we can finally see here in chapter 79 our Kaito with his true happiness, symbolized literally by the birds most associated with happiness. Another thing that caught my eyes is of course the lily depicted on the cover of the book Akiho is holding, a nice callback to Akiho's mother and Kaito's torment, Lilie. She's always going to be with them ❤️

The Japanese editorial text over the picture is an excerpt of what Momo was musing to herself in chapter 39, while imagining to talk to Kaito: "You traveled with her, and spent time together with her". I think CLAMP chose to feature this line to indicate an important thing that will be restored at the end of this chapter.

Everyone Is Doing Their Best

The chapter starts with a panel showing some light coming off Yukito's house, and we find out that even Touya fainted, exhausted by the effort to keep time stopped as much as possible. Ruby Moon is cradling his head on her lap trying to assist him and "recharge" his magical power, in hope to be able to maintain time "stopped" a bit more. In fact, if you notice, the "black covering" that symbolizes the time-stopping spell isn't completely destroyed yet, but only riddled with "holes", an indication that the spell is still somehow active, even if feebly. I imagine this might "slow down" the attacks, which are still coming but probably not at full speed like they would if the spell came undone completely. I have to point out immediately a mild inaccuracy in the ENG version, that I want to specify in order to dispel extreme theories before they're born: no, Ruby Moon didn't give up all of her powers to Touya, the verb used here is simply 補える, "can replenish (your magic)", not "give all".

Touya doesn't lose his sense of humor even in a dire situation like this, and comments sarcastically "What are you, a battery?", a clear recall to the whole "batteries" matter that came out in the un-rewritten world. Touya isn't supposed to remember about that, and he probably doesn't, but this is just a way from CLAMP to show that even in a situation where memories have been rewritten, some things will be unconsciously said again, because they're just meant to happen.

Ruby Moon calls for assistance from her "brother" Spinel Sun (love how even in these true forms, she still calls him "Suppy"), whom rejects the appellative of "battery" but agrees to give her a hand with "recharging" Touya to keep the spell up a bit longer. Everyone looks outside, only one thought in their minds, which is voiced clearly by a serious Tomoyo: "Sakura and everyone else are fighting with all they've got". I have to point out a typo here in the Japanese version (nothing serious, it can happen and will be surely fixed in the tankobon version): Tomoyo calls Sakura "Sakura-san". I loved the "sparkles" around Tomoyo's eyes, as if indicating that her extraordinary intuition is "at work" and just telling her that, even if they can't see them because they're quite far away, Sakura and the others are doing whatever they can to stop these attacks. And the fact they can see the attacks, but not their friends and their condition, must be really hard to witness, for all of them. But no worries, there's Touya nii-chan who's always ready to lighten the mood even in this challenging situation, joking that "If they don't get back before the curfew, they won't be getting their snacks tomorrow!". Here the ENG adds "squirt" to make Touya refer specifically to Sakura, but truth to be told, in the JP there's no subject, so he might be referring to everyone. It's amazing how he's able to keep his spirit up and be sarcastic even in this situation....he really believes in his little sister so much!

I'll Make Them Forget About You

Back where our heroes are, the attacks keep coming relentlessly, countered by Syaoran, Yue and Kero in tandem. Sakura reflects on the fact that the only transparent Cards she's got left are these two she's holding in her hands (Time and Rewind) and Flight. This statement leads me to believe that when Record transformed into that crystal that entered her, that meant that the Card completed its duty and disappeared inside of her. But Sakura isn't worried at all, because she knows that she can create more Cards. Yessss, this development that I've been anticipating since quite some time is finally here! ✨🎉 Sakura seems to finally have a concrete plan, but before proceeding, she needs to ascertain something. She asks directly to Kaito: "The people who are using these spells were trying to hurt you, right?". Kaito, with a pensive face, answers affirmatively.

But it's when Sakura asks again "Were they trying to hurt Akiho too?" that his expression turns really painful, the background after him portraying well his raging emotions and, while Mokona-sensei chose to leave Akiho hidden by Kaito's black wings in the previous panels, now she finally shows how both she and Kaito are holding onto eachother, while our boy answers with a "...Yes" dripping with sorrow. It really squeezed my heart with pain, this scene. Because as long as Sakura was asking about him, his expression was pensive but almost as if it's something he's used to, that didn't shake him too much. But when Sakura mentions Akiho, god, that wrecked him. Any mention, any reminescence of what those bastards did to her and how they were chasing after her to put their filthy hands on her again wrecks him even now, and it's like Mokona with her visual skills is showing how Kaito seems to be holding Akiho a little bit tighter, while he answers Sakura's question. I also have to point out something that I had noticed already from last chapter, but a panel tricked me into believing I was just seeing things: CLAMP here use a dark screentone for Kaito's eyes, that he never had before (actually, no other character in CCS got this effect in their eyes). This effect will be used on him for the entire chapter.

And it seems like it's the very same screentone that was used for the dragon. I think this might be an indication that the wings aren't the only reminescence of his dragon appearance!

Sakura shows once again an incredible empathy that allows her to go right to the heart of the issue without investigating much. If Kaito rewrote an entire world, and if it's true that Akiho in the previous world didn't have all the love and familiar support she's got now, it means that she was probably in danger too. And seeing as these people are attacking them now because they freed Kaito from his "punishment", Sakura doesn't really need much to make 2+2 and understand the situation. Sakura believes in Akiho, therefore she believes in Kaito too, and knows that if he came to this point it's because they were in a desperate and dangerous situation.

Showing an incredible insight, Sakura shocks both Kaito and Akiho by asking:

Sakura, JP: "In that case, can I make those people forget about you both?"

Because our girl needs to make sure that the plan she came up with won't have any undesired consequences. But most importantly, she needs to have their consent. She reiterates this once again, actually she will make sure to ask Kaito and Akiho's consent 3 times in total. She says: JP, lit. "If going back to before the world was rewritten will put you through hardships once again, then, can I just make them forget?" Kaito is even more shocked, because he finally understands Sakura's intent. A generous, selfless intent born from a loving heart. Our girl wants to make sure that these two will be safe and sound once she fixes this situation. She can't take risks, because their happiness is all she's really caring for right now. And in his shocked expression, I can also see some kind of "omg YES, PLEASE" vibe. Because probably, having those terrible people forgetting all about them is everything he ever wished, but couldn't achieve. And I think it's really funny how we berated Kaito so much in the past chapters for making Akiho and the others forget facts that happened before and forgetting about him, but here Sakura just takes "inspiration" from him and actually decides to use that same "trick" in the right way. Because it's not fair that it should be them, the abused people, to forget about their most important person, in order to achieve a happy life for at least one of them. It isn't fair and it isn't right that Kaito was driven into making all the mess that he made, pushed by desperation. The abusers, that clan and Association of magicians, should be the ones forgetting.

But this is Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card's finale, and Sakura definitely hasn't finished with being amazing yet, she actually just started. Her very strong power at this point allows her not only to see things that were difficult before, but also to connect the dots more easily thanks to that renowned instinct that I've always talked to you about, and that she learned to finally listen to.

As if she were seeing through him with X-rays, she confidently affirms that there's a book inside of him, a white book where you can inscribe magic on. And she also knows that that same book was inside Akiho, once. I guess this might be even coming from past memories of the unrewritten world (do you remember when, before the play started, Sakura said that she could feel something inside Akiho?). Akiho of course is shocked to hear that, and from her expression you can almost feel the chill that went down her spine in that moment. Sakura affirms that this book knows both Akiho and Kaito (thanks to the fact that it was inside both of them - something that I've always found painfully heartbreaking but also quite moving, for my ship), and it's got a very strong power inside of it. These will be two crucial things for Sakura's plan. In fact, our heroine is hellbent in attempting something pretty arduous: utilizing that artifact's power to create a new Card. For impartiality, I have to point out that the ENG added (completely on their whim) a "you, her special person" that isn't there in the JP version! Of course it's all the better for me, since they repeat (finally with the right adjective) that Kaito is Akiho's special person, but it's kinda funny that they messed it up so much in the previous chapters, and now they're adding it where there isn't any mention of it!

Sakura will be using a tool that knows the both of them, therefore she is sure that her plan will succeed, because the Card will know what it will need to erase. Sakura asks for Kaito and Akiho's agreement one last time. After hearing how those people wanted to hurt them both and even implanted the same magical artifact inside of her, Akiho is quite resolute and doesn't have any doubt: on with the wiping off! It doesn't matter who those people are, they've tried to harm her most important person and her too, so she doesn't really seem to give a damn about proceeding with this plan. Kaito, on the other hand, seems to be giving a more lackluster affirmative reply, but it's not that he's uncertain: he's just still riddled with guilt for all the mess that he's done, and he's probably realizing that now Sakura will need to put herself on the line in order to fix this and protect both of them, hence his sad face.

Still surfing the confidence wave, Sakura guesses that once those people have forgotten about Akiho and Kaito, then the magic arrows will stop too, and Kaito confirms that: forgetting about the person who had the Seal of D enforced on him will be equal to "undo" both the activation of the Seal itself (when Kaito removed the book from Akiho) and also the rescission of it (what Sakura did when she freed Kaito from the cage). This will therefore stop the arrows too, because the Seal wouldn't have been triggered in the first place. However, Kaito warns her that, although time is still barely "stopped" (because the time-stopping spell is still weakly on), it's necessary an enormous amount of power in order to do what Sakura wants to do. I have to point out another inaccuracy in the ENG translation in this part, which makes Kaito say "before things could get worse" and I have the feeling they misunderstood the word 辛うじて, "barely" or "narrowly", which is also written with the kanji of 辛い, "hard" or "tough". So Kaito isn't saying "before things could get worse" but actually meaning "although time is barely stopped".

Sakura doesn't seem to be scared by Kaito's warning, and activates her wand without a second thought, and immediately we can see that her task wil NOT be easy, as she can feel the strain almost right away.

Here we go with another inaccuracy of the ENG translation:

Sakura, ENG: "Great book, please show yourself! My power alone won't be enough...!" Sakura, JP: "The book....doesn't want to come out. (it's too difficult to pull it out) with just my power..."

Basically, Sakura isn't begging the book to "show itself", she's actually actively trying to pull it out of Kaito, and she's aware that it's opposing a lot of resistance, and her power alone isn't enough to take this damn book out. Sakura refuses to give up, because everyone else is doing their best too. Yes, everyone else.

And that's when CLAMP decided to bring us a big surprise for this finale.

A pair of hands seem to be appearing next to Sakura's, as if a spirit is hugging her from behind. We can see the famous fan that we learned to recognize so well ever since her first appearance in Movie 1. Sakura feels immediately the same magical power of Syaoran surrounding her, and with her instinct she finally recognizes her: it's Syaoran's mother, YELAN!!! We can see her, sweating and all, in her sacred chinese pavilion, lending her power to help in this difficult task.

What a great, welcome surprise for this finale!! You might have heard me saying on Twitter that Clear Card is really a celebration of motherhood, with this constant presence of mothers and mother figures who try to help these kids growing up without removing their right to choose for themselves. And since Yelan is the only mother figure who can concretely help Sakura in this moment, with her immense power, I really loved to see how this woman didn't hesitate to assist her future daugher in law. For any SyaoSaku fan, this scene here is a huge thing. We have seen in the anime how Yelan doted on Sakura ever since she met her in Movie 1, even before her own son realized his feelings for this girl. Yelan and Sakura haven't met in the manga yet (and hello, CLAMP, now this is a good chance for letting that happen, after the madness is over), but the woman didn't hesitate a moment to lend her power. I can really imagine how along these two will get, in the future. ❤️

Sakura thanks her aloud, while her eyes show that she's really really tired. Yelan's assistance is finally effective in summoning the artifact book out of Kaito, and we see again those countless book pages that we saw both when Akiho used to go "berserk", and also in the most heartbreaking scene of chapter 70. Kaito, still holding onto a worried Akiho, seems to suffer physically from this removal, and I can't understand if it's because removing something magical from inside is naturally painful (we've been shown something like that before, Syaoran crouching to the ground in pain while the Sakura Cards were being removed from inside of him) OR if the removal of the artifact also triggered his poor health conditions in which we left him, before he disappeared in chapter 70.

Sakura tries with all she's got and finally manages to turn the artifact into its "true form": a book filled with countless of spells written in strange magic runes.

You have spotted it, right? ☝️ I haven't seen many fandom reactions yet, but I guess this "cameo" made more than one person scream: it's Fay D. Fluorite's tattoo, yes! This page of the "book" is probably describing the procedure to cast that tattoo (which was also a kind of "seal", if I remember correctly). So that spells exists in this CCS world too! 😅 The magic Sakura is weaving starts "working" on the book, literally removing the spells from its pages and turning them back to their original form of magical books (remember that the Squids used to say that they would inscribe "magic books" and their power onto Akiho?).

Then, solemnly, we hear probably for the last time ever the magical incantation that accompanied us in the beginning of the story, used by Sakura to secure the strange manifestations of power into a transparent Card:

ENG: "Force without master, heed the call of my Staff of Dreams and become my power! SECURE!"

The countless of books and all this tremendous amount of power get secured into the birth of a new Card: BLANK!!!

Blank got the human appearance of Akiho, but also the protective wings of Kaito. The girl is holding a book (of course, how perfect for her) which is the representation of the artifact that was inside both Kaito and Akiho. This card is really so meaningful for someone like me who loves Akiho and Kaito. It's representing them united in their suffering (the artifact) but also in the hope for a better future (Akiho is smiling and the Card will be used to grant them safety, away from their abusers). I've always imagined that one of the last Cards Sakura might have produced would have Akiho and Kaito's elements, and here it is.

Also, how AWESOME is that Sakura managed to dispose of that damn artifact and succeeded to use it for Kaito and Akiho's sake, and turned it against the monsters who created it??? HOW. AWESOME. IS. THAT!!!!

Producing the very first consciously created transparent Card sucked almost all of Sakura's power and strength, and she's close to fainting, under the terrified eyes of Akiho, who lets go of Kaito for a moment in a gesture of going towards her "sister". But Sakura isn't done yet, no. She can't give up yet because her job isn't done.

And I Will Make Them Remember About You

Sakura wants for Akiho and the people who care about her (the ENG decided to translate this with "the people SHE holds dear") to remember who Akiho really is. She wants basically to "undo" what the rewriting of the world caused on the people who know Akiho, making them believe that she was born into the Kinomoto family and that she was Sakura and Touya's sister.

After pondering for a while and discussing with my friends over at my Discord server, I decided I'm not gonna go out on a limb and assume things from this decision, because I definitely NEED to read the next chapter to see how much Sakura intends people to remember, with this move. It's really not clear at all, as of now.

Anyway, other translation inaccuracy incoming!

Sakura, ENG: "I'm going to make another new card for that...and I might not have the power to do it alone" Sakura, JP: "It might probably be really difficult to create one more new card with my power, right now..."

As you can see, the nuance is different, because Sakura in the JP addresses how it's almost impossible for her to create another new card in the situation she is in right now, exhausted and all.

That's why, very cleverly, she's going to do something different. (My gosh how proud I am of this girl!!)

Saying "But these two Cards will surely help me", Sakura skillfully manages to merge Time and Rewind to create a new Card, not from scratch (which requires more power) but using what she's already got: and that's how the REMIND Card is born!!! The name of the Card originated by just replacing the "W" of Rewind with the "M" of Time. Ingenious, isn't it???

And as the two Cards merge, they give us lots of flashbacks, like the "effect" used here resembles a lot the one that used to happen when Sakura was changing the Clow Cards into the Sakura Cards back in the old arcs, or how the merging of two Cards seems to also be a callback to how the "card without name" and the "Nothing" merged to create HOPE in the very last minutes of Movie 2! What a nostalgic trip down the memories lane!

And the appearance of this Card is even more touching, because it features Syaoran (with his current age) holding Nadeshiko's pendant watch. I found that so sweet, especially coupled with Yelan's assistance to Sakura in this chapter. Yelan associated with Sakura, and Syaoran associated with Nadeshiko. How sweet. And when you think that even Lilie, Akiho's mother, was associated with Kaito, you really can realize that this is some kind of "theme" that CLAMP seemed to be wanting to portray in this story.

I Can't Be On Everyone's Side

And now, the scene that I think is worth the whole chapter, but probably the whole Clear Card Arc in its entirety. As usual, with important scenes, I'll use the literal translation from Japanese:

Sakura, JP: "It might not be right that there'll be people who will forget things (after this), but....I can't be everyone's friend/ally/can't be on everyone's side. So I won't go back...but actually, along with the people important to me... I WANT TO GO ON"

Wow. Let that sink in.

Sakura, of Cardcaptor Sakura, just came to the realization and spelled out clearly that she cannot be on everyone's side. That she cannot be "everyone's friend", like in a cheesy fairytale.

And I really, really, want to thank CLAMP-sensei for this scene and this line because for a period, long time ago, I was worried that this story would go down the "let's be friends" or "let's show sympathy to them" route. But as the chapters continued and the things CLAMP told us about the Association and the Squids were more and more cruel, and they made me more and more sick, I started to realize that there was simply no way CLAMP could've had Sakura try to justify or compromise with them. Because when cruelty is real, there's no compromise to be made.

This scene also shows how Sakura realizes for the first time ever that in her world, contrary to what we all believed previously, evil exists. It might not touch her or her "entourage" directly (and she's really blessed for that), but it exists out there and it's hurting people, people who can also become really important to her. And she decides to not stand idly by, blessed as she is with the luck of not experiencing that evilness, but actually using whatever it is in her power to bring those suffering people to safety.

Sakura cannot fight those people on equal terms. She's just 13, and although her power is very strong, she's still inexperienced. Moreover, she cannot really bring herself to deny her current nature and use violence on other human beings. That's not Sakura. I want you guys to reflect on this because I know that one of the favorite things expected for this finale was to have a direct magical confrontation with the true villains of this arc, defeating them and restablishing the peace. And I am sincere when I say that I would've wished for the same too, because you know how much I love Kaito and Akiho, and how much I was disgusted to read about what they did to them. I've spread my "burn the squids" gifs all over the fandom. I wanted someone to vindicate them. But not here. Not in this manga. I realized that after the initial satisfaction, I would've probably felt like the series would've been "defiled". And that's exactly what happens when you answer to violence with more violence.

Sakura just could not go hunting those bastards down and defeat them in a magical battle. Because, powerful and corrupted in their greed as they are, the only way to "fix" this situation would've been to exterminate them. I just could not picture this story to cross that boundary, no matter how much the bar had already been raised well over what we initially thought.

So, if someone out there is disappointed by this outcome, I'm sorry for you, but it was just not meant to be and I'm actually really glad that this series kept true to its fundamental values. Of course it would, CLAMP really do care about this series and they know very well how far to push the plot, and when to actually stop.

So what is the role of Akiho's clan and the Magic Association in this story, especially considering that we never saw their faces at all? Talking with lots of fans in these years, especially Japanese, I've come to the conclusion that they are not in this story to fill the "villain that needs to be deafeated" role, but actually they're a representation of abusive families that smother and suffocate their children with expectations, completely disregarding those children's natural inclinations, and abuse them when they do not meet such expectations, but also the society as a whole, that looks at you only basing on how it can take advantage of you. Which is exactly what happened to Akiho and Kaito, driving them to very dark places. The absence of faces for those characters makes it possible for the readers to see the Squids and the Association as the representation of whatever environment they relate the most to. It can be family, society, school, workplace etc... It also helps us focusing on their actions, rather than their faces, and not attribute any prejudice to them (because of religion, race, skin color, or whatever other attribute they could have).

Seeing as the story treats them more like a concept, than an actual entity, it's basically impossible for Sakura to defeat them (and their great power is an indication of that impossibility). Just like in real life, darkness will always exist, along with light. Good and evil will always be side by side. It's bigger than any of us. Then, what can we do, in a situation like this? What Sakura is choosing to do, here, is not to confront directly with violence these people who are way out of her league, and not even to sit back and look, but actually finding a way to make them forget about her friends and keeping her friends safe, granting them the possibility of living a happy life, finally away from the darkness of the past, healing the wounds on their souls together with the people they love and who love them back. Because even if you've been abused in the past, you can still hope for a happy life.

The focus here is all on helping the abused people. And Sakura, in order to do that, is okay with coming to terms with the fact that she can't be on everyone's side, and she needs to choose. In the end, the thing that really matters the most is to GO ON with your most important people. Not going back to what is lost, but going forward. And I know that this is such a CLAMP theme, and I'm glad that they reiterated it in this arc. When I say that Clear Card brought Sakura so much more closer to what's usual for CLAMP, I mean this.

The panel with Sakura raising her staff and shouting she wants to go on is absolutely beautiful, with those wings growing so big and unleashing Sakura's power in a storm of cherry blossom petals.

Sakura is exhausted, she finally reached her limit by using her ultimate magic. As she faints, her eyes just make it in time to catch a glimpse of her prince, the love of her life grabbing tightly his girlfriend's hand, to not let her fall, while the watch of Remind and the book of Blank do their job in the background. And I really loved this spread too, because even if it's not a conventional romantic scene made of physical display of love, this in my opinion is even more powerful. Many were reminded of Tsubasa, but I was also reminded of the long time those two spent unable to touch one another, and this scene here seems like a catharsis for that hardship they went through. Syaoran will always catch Sakura everytime she falls, he will always be there to grab her hand, no matter if he can really touch her or not. Cause his love is stronger than any kind of impediment. He will always be by her side, no matter what. When she's exhausted by her heroine's duties, she knows that she can always count on him to support her.

And speaking of "always be by her side", I just can't avoid mentioning how Akiho and Kaito stayed "glued" to eachother for the entire duration of this chapter, protecting and supporting one another. Kaito, in particular, kept holding Akiho even as Sakura's magic was hurting him like hell, because it was extracting the book from him. Even in excruciating pain, he did not let go of Akiho, intent in protecting her and keeping her safe in his hold. Akiho let go of him just for a moment when she was scared out of her mind for Sakura, but went back to him when she saw that her "sister" was hellbent in completing her task no matter what. Kaito, as the good "moon boy" he is, is someone who shows his feelings through his actions rather than words, just like Syaoran. And his constant grip on Akiho in this chapter, such an opposite act compared to how he used to stop his hand everytime it started reaching out to her, told me all that I needed to know about him: she's his most important person, and he will never let go of her, ever again.

Sakura wakes up in her bed. The scene is a direct parallel with an almost identical scene in chapter 3, as you can see here:

Kero is next to her and is relieved to see her awake, so he goes to shout in the hallway, directed to Touya, that Sakura is finally awake. Sakura seems a bit surprised to see Kero talking so nonchalantly with her brother, and he tells her that he chatted with him back at Yukito's house, together with Suppy, so I guess now he finds it "natural" to talk to her brother too! 😂 I'm kinda glad to know that, I like this "change of relationship", compared to the old series (and it was also kinda long overdue).

Sakura opens the palm of her hands and she finds the Dream Key, still intact and all. She also asks about Remind and Blank, and Kero confirms to her that she was able to use them successfully! Sakura is absolutely delighted to hear that, and says "We were able to go on!"

And thaaaaaaat's how the second-to-last chapter of Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card ends! Solving a lot of the pending situations, but still leaving some secondary questions that will surely find a (more or less) detailed explanation in the final, next chapter. And well, we also have to prepare to not have ALL the answers to ALL the questions we might have. This is usual for CLAMP, and especially in their Spaces they never made it a secret that they love for their fans to wreck their brains over theories and imagining the characters' future after a series is over. They love for the fans to give their interpretations to things, they encourage that a lot (also because it creates more long-lasting engagement with their series).

Alas, I expect they'll leave something in particular to everyone's interpretation, but we'll see. 😅

Overall, I really loved this chapter and it was really emotional for me. I think it's fitting for a "climax". Sakura was ABSOLUTELY running the show and after this I dare anyone to say that she isn't the main character of her story. She pushed her limits, and even questioned her own morality in doing so. What a wonderful thing. She reminded me so much of Sakura-hime when she shooted all those monsters in order to take the precious egg, back in the Acid Tokyo arc of Tsubasa. She knew she was doing something bad, but her wish to do everything needed in order to "have him back" was stronger than anything else. And she made her own choice. Here, Sakura, on a smaller scale, made her own choice too.

Now, I hope in the last chapter we'll be granted the possibility to delve a bit more into Kaito and his thoughts, I need to see his character development, I need to see that he learned something from this. That he -at least- started to interrogate himself over the nature of his feelings for Akiho. I know it's reasonable to think that with him, things will take looooong time, but as least show me the signs. Because I need to know that Akiho will be truly happy with him (I know she will!), and she can only be if he's learned to be honest with himself. And learned what Lilie meant with the last conversation we saw between them.

Also, WHERE'S MOMO, I NEED TO SEE MOMO BEFORE THIS ENDS!!

Okay, this is probably the longest post I ever did but I think as the second-to-last chapter it deserved to have some big thematics explored in depth, because they're very important. I'm still pondering if I should divide the post of the final chapter in two because, in addition to even more pages, I expect there'll be soooooooooo much to talk about (cross your fingers with me that there won't be any translation mistake).

I also hope there'll be room for an epilogue or a couple of extra chapters, to help us coping with the separation in a more gradual way, cause after 7 years it's quite hard. I was curious to see the end, of course, but also not entirely ready to let this wonderful story go. I really, really enjoyed it and I say this from the bottom of my heart. I don't care what everyone else thinks, I can only be grateful to CLAMP for Clear Card Arc. 🙏

Chapter 80, along with all the tears that will come with it, is expected to be uploaded on November 29th on CLAMP's Youtube channel. Yes, it's less than a month away! I also expect some news about the anime (BLESS THE ANIME!! Something to cling onto when the manga is over 😭).

Well, see you at the end of November (please come to hold my hand cause I cannot do this alone, lol) !!!

#cardcaptor sakura #card captor sakura #ccsakura #clear card arc #ccs spoilers #sakura card captor #chapter 79 #sakura kinomoto #akiho shinomoto #yuna d. kaito #syaoran li #translation differences

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alpha-trauma-novel-trans · 2 months ago

Text

Chapter 79

As he washed, his mind wandered back to the day he started dating Wooyeon.

He looked really hurt, and he burst into tears and told him that he was going to sort out his feelings.

'I don’t want to like you anymore, Seonsaeng-nim.'

Was it a mistake to call Wooyeon 'Yeon-ah' in a fit of anger when he wanted to end everything after just one night of sex? Was it wrong to feel betrayed when he was the one who left Wooyeon first?

As soon as he realized he was going to lose him, Dohyun couldn't think of anything else. The guilt, the conscience, all of it was unnecessary. He just wanted to keep Wooyeon by his side. The past he had defended with such sensible reasons finally collapsed like a sandcastle.

Once again, Dohyun had missed the opportunity, and this time he couldn't think of a way to catch him. He just vaguely thought that he had to see him first. Well, that didn't mean he didn't have any plan at all.

Dohyun checked the watch on his wrist and sat down in front of the building where Wooyeon's first lecture was held. Because the first semester final exams were coming up, the campus was crowded from early in the morning.

In about two hours, he would arrive.

'Hu.'

Dohyun had never been so nervous in his life, it felt like his whole body was on edge. He didn't know if it was because he'd been up all night or the memories from earlier, but he wasn't feeling well.

“Good morning, Sunbae.”

“Aren't you early, Oppa?”

Ten minutes, 20 minutes, then 30 minutes. Many people passed by Dohyun while he waited for Wooyeon. Normally, they would have talked for a while, but they simply said hello after looking at him. His expression must have looked pretty bad to others.

“Eh? Hyung!”

It was Sungyu, who had gotten to school earlier than Wooyeon, who called out to Dohyun. As soon as he saw Dohyun, Sungyu rushed over to him and his eyes widened when he saw his complexion.

“Hyung, did you not sleep at all? Your dark circles are no joke.”

“I didn't sleep, but...are they that bad?”

Dohyun rubbed the corners of his eyes awkwardly. He was a little tired, but he didn't expect it to be that noticeable. Since he'd upset Wooyeon, he should have shown at least one good thing, so he felt embarrassed looking so bad.

“No, you're still handsome Hyung, so it's okay.”

Sungyu smiled playfully and stuck up both thumbs. It was obvious that he was exaggerating because Dohyun seemed to be in a bad mood. Dohyun tried to smile out of habit, but gave up when he couldn't muster the energy.

"But Hyung, by any chance..."

Seeing Dohyun like that, Sungyu cautiously broke off his thoughts. Judging from the way he was slowly checking his expression, it was clear that he had a rough idea. He blinked a few times before asking in a low voice.

“Did you have a fight with Wooyeon... No, is something wrong?”

It was a flimsy gesture. If it was Garam, she would have outright asked him if they'd fought, but it was just like Sungyu to change his words mid-sentence. Normally, Dohyun would have answered without embarrassment, but he didn't have that luxury right now.

“It just happened.”

“...You didn't break up, did you?”

As soon as he said those words, a car approached. The car's unusual make and tinted windows made it seem like it didn't belong to an ordinary student. Dohyun kept his gaze fixed on it and spoke to himself.

"I'm waiting because I don't want to do that."

Suddenly, the car door opened, not from the backseat, but from the driver's seat. The woman, neatly dressed in a suit, circled the car without giving Dohyun a glance. The way she mechanically opened the back seat door was familiar to Dohyun.

“...Secretary Yoon.”

Dohyun walked briskly toward her, leaving Sungyu in a stunned silence.

A man in a white hat got out of the car as several students watched. His face was pure white and his facial features delicate. It was Wooyeon.

“I'll be back by the time you finish...”

Wooyeon walked away without listening to Secretary Yoon's words. He didn't look around, didn't feel embarrassed by the prying eyes, just walked toward the building with his bag in one hand and pulled his hat down with the other.

Whew, Dohyun took a short deep breath before calling out to him in a low voice.

“Yeon-ah.”

“....”

Suddenly, Wooyeon stopped walking. Secretary Yoon, who was about to return to the car, also glanced over.

She would probably report everything she saw to Suhyang. If Suhyang had given any instructions, she would stop Dohyun from approaching Wooyeon.

But Secretary Yoon got into the car as if she hadn't seen him. There being no other bodyguard was clearly the compromise between Wooyeon and Suhyang. Of course, after the article Wooyeon mentioned broke out, it would be impossible to even talk like this.

"Let's talk."

Wooyeon wordlessly raised his head and looked at Dohyun.

They were only a step apart. Dohyun didn't move any closer. The students, including Sungyu, looked at them, but it felt like they were the only ones there.

“It'll just take a minute.”

Wooyeon bit his lower lip at Dohyun's words. Without taking his eyes off his face, Dohyun watched his expression change. His red lips turned white, and he spoke almost inaudibly.

“I have nothing to say.”

With that, Wooyeon walked past Dohyun. Sungyu's eyes widened in confusion. But Dohyun had anticipated the reaction well enough, so he silently followed after him.

“....”

It was a strange sight. Neither Dohyun nor Wooyeon said a word as they crossed the hallway. Wooyeon looked ahead, and Dohyun followed him. Both of them were famous in their own way, so this was bound to cause some strange rumors.

“Yeon-ah.”

Dohyun didn't call out again until they reached the back door of the lecture hall. Wooyeon paused before opening the door and spoke to Dohyun without even looking at him.

“Don't call me that.”

“....”

“That's not my name.”

His voice was firm and cold. It was quite evident that he was Suhyang's child. Undeterred, Dohyun continued to speak firmly.

“I'll wait until the end of the lecture.”

“....”

“No, let's just listen to this lecture together.

And with that, Dohyun opened the door to the lecture hall. Since it was a first-year lesson, there were quite a few familiar faces inside. Dohyun nodded his head as his juniors greeted him warmly.

“Aren't you coming in?”

"...What are you doing right now?"

Only then did Wooyeon's gaze turn to Dohyun. Though his expression was grim, it was the face Dohyun had been thinking about all night. Resisting the urge to pull him into a hug, Dohyun spoke so only Wooyeon could hear.

“I can't break up with you.”

It was the same words he'd said yesterday. It was also the declaration that Wooyeon had replied to by saying he couldn't trust him anymore. As if to remind him of those words, he pursed his lips.

“I,”

"Register for classes."

Those three words were enough. Wooyeon shut his mouth and crumpled his face. Dohyun snatched his bag and set it down on a seat near the back door.

"You said you'd buy me a meal if I helped you register for classes."

It was okay to call it lame. It was okay for Wooyeon to be annoyed and ask when that would happen. Dohyun was going to hold on to him this time, if only to get Wooyeon to talk to him.

"You said it yourself that you'd buy me something that wasn't cheap.”

Wooyeon's mouth shut tight and he glared at Dohyun. His eyes barely visible under the brim of his hat glared in defiance. It was silent for a while, but Dohyun knew this trick would work.

“I'll consider this the last time.”

At the word 'last,' Wooyeon's eyes wavered. The emotion he couldn't hide showed that he hadn't fully organized his thoughts. Dohyun smiled bitterly, pinning his hopes on that.

“Just this once, Yeon-ah.”

Sungyu came in late, took a seat away from them, and kept a watchful eye on them. Wooyeon grabbed his bag and ran to the front, Dohyun chased after him and took the seat next to him.

Wooyeon thought Dohyun was going to be kicked out by the professor, but unfortunately, the professor was more than happy to see him. When he asked if he was still taking classes and told him to come and listen whenever he wanted, Dohyun smiled politely.

“Now, this part...”

While the professor was teaching, Dohyun rested his chin on his hand and watched Wooyeon. On his desk, he had a notebook he'd borrowed from Sungyu open, and in his hand, he held a pen he had borrowed from Sungyu. Wooyeon ignored Dohyun's gaze and focused on the lesson.

'Does he take after his Omega mother?'

If Suhyang was a highly saturated oil painting, Wooyeon was a watercolor painting with pigments mixed in. His eyes peeking out from beneath the hat, the staight bridge of his nose and lips, and his slender jawline.

Maybe it's the long eyelashes, or maybe it's the thin eyelids. Every time he moved his eyes, it felt like he was looking at a well-done painting. A painting painted with a fine brush, using only clean, beautiful colors.

Did Wooyoen not sleep? Dohyun lowered his gaze, thinking that he looked tired. The nape of his neck, which would normally be plainly visible, was half-covered by something. It was a short-sleeved tee, with a brand mark on the chest. The wide, round top felt a bit too much for this season, even considering the thinness of the fabric.

Dohyun knew why he was wearing it. It was probably because of the colorful marks that were visible if you paid attention. The evidence of how Dohyun had bit and sucked his lover and wouldn't let go of him was still there, visible.

'How can I give up when things are like this?'

Even while being rejected by him, Dohyun felt excited just by being near him. His fresh pheromones tantalized his senses, and the slightest gesture drew his attention.

Even him touching his earlobe was cute, how could he let such a Wooyeon go?

"...Aren't you going to listen to class?"

“I don't have to.”

The tips of his ears looked flushed. He wasn't sure if it was a coincidence, but every time Wooyeon tugged his earlobe, Dohyun felt like biting it. It was red and ripe, so it would taste even better if he put it in his mouth.

'He'll get mad if you touch him.'

He shouldn't be interrupting class, but Wooyeon was right there in front of him. The Wooyeon he'd been thinking about all night and wanted to see so much he was already worn out. It was okay because they were close right now, but if he tried to pull away again, things might really fall apart.

Dohyun twirled the pen and covered the corner of his mouth with his cupped hand. The pen in Wooyeon's hand moved eagerly over the notebook. It seemed like he was taking notes from the board, but the content was completely random.

"That's wrong."

“....”

“Romanticism from the end of the 18th century.”

Wooyeon, who had written '19', crossed out two lines and corrected the number. He thought about correcting him, but stopped and sighed. He took a pencil out of his case and scribbled in small letters in the corner of his notebook.

[ I can't concentrate because of Sunbae ].

He had written 'seons' and awkwardly changed it to 'sunb'. Instead of pointing it out, Dohyun took Wooyeon's sharpie and wrote a reply.

[ Sorry ]

Seeing the apology, Wooyeon erased his handwriting with an eraser, but for some reason left Dohyun's “sorry” intact. When Wooyeon asked for the pencil back, Dohyun wrote again.

[ What do you want for dinner?]

“....”

The baffled stare returned. Wooyeon just pursed his lips, and Dohyun thought he knew what he was trying to say. He must have been thinking, “Why dinner when we haven’t even had lunch?”

[ Why dinner when you haven't even had lunch? ]

As expected, Wooyeon took out a new pencil and wrote that. Dohyun stifled a laugh and gently rolled his eyes. The fact that he couldn't hide his feelings and showed them as they were was one of the things that made him so endearing.

[ So, what do you want for lunch? ]

Wooyeon gave him an apologetic look. It was clear that he had understood Dohyun's intentions, albeit belatedly. But before Wooyeon could protest, Dohyun numbered them.

[ 1. meat 2. noodles 3. rice ]

[ 1-1.pork 1-2.beef ]

[ *not cheap ]

A hollow laugh escaped him. It was absurd to be choosing a menu before he even confirmed the appointment. Dohyun drew a circle around 'beef' without paying attention. And wrote under it.

[ Should we go there again? ].

The memory of eating with Wooyeon came back to him. He preferred cake to rice, and when he gave him chocolate, he made a subtle expression. Dohyun remembered how he looked like he was about to cry, and how seeing that he also felt like crying.

“....”

Wooyeon bit his lower lip and grabbed the pencil. From the way his eyes narrowed, it was clear that he, too, was remembering the past. Pushing his hat down so Dohyun couldn't see his face, he scribbled.

[ I'm going to have lunch with Sungyu. ]

[ Sungyu has some student council thing to do. ]

A betrayed gaze flicked to Sungyu. In truth, Dohyun didn't really know that, he just guessed like he always did. Adorably, Wooyeon seemed to think that he couldn't refuse an offer without a commitment.

[ Don't stare at Sungyu. ]

They wrote back and forth for a while after that. The content was nothing special, but strangely, the conversation didn't stop. The professor, who had been coughing as a warning at first, let it slide when Dohyun smiled at him.

"We'll stop here for today."

“.....”

As soon as the professor left, Wooyeon quickly looked at the blackboard. Unlike the densely written board, Wooyeon's haphazard handwriting only showed the traces of his struggle to turn 19 into 18. Dohyun put down his mechanical pencil, looking at his two eyes shaking in confusion.

“I'll give you my old notes.”

Wooyeon's gaze shifted. His dark, copper-colored eyes were filled with resentment. The corners of Dohyun's mouth twitched as he spoke.

“I'll also give you the genealogy for the final exam.”

“...I don't need it.”

It seemed necessary, but Wooyeon replied with a grunt, and as he closed his notebook, Dohyun slipped in a comment.

"This is my first time doing something like this. You know, talking in class through notes."

“....”

Wooyeon's expression changed. There was no response, but it was probably his first time too. Maybe that's why his hand was awkward and slow as he slipped the notebook into his bag.

“So, what do you want for lunch?”

Dohyun casually grabbed the bag as soon as he zipped it up. Wooyeon lowered his eyebrows like a puppy that had its treats taken away. He looked at his bag, then at Dohyun's face. Dohyun could practically hear the sound of his mind reeling.

“Not lunch...what about dinner?”

This was all he could think of. Dohyun tilted his head as if to encourage him to continue. Wooyeon touched his collar and averted his gaze.

“I'll buy you a meal, but I don't have time for lunch, so let's have dinner.”

Not having time for lunch was a blatant lie. It was clear he had forgotten who had organized his schedule. He probably planned to postpone it for now and make up another excuse later.

“What time for dinner?”

"...I'll contact you later."

Honestly, even if today passed Wooyeon would still have classes tomorrow. Wooyeon, who was honest and unpretentious, would come to class no matter what happened. However, Dohyun didn't have enough patience to wait until tomorrow.

“I don't have a cell phone.”

“Eh?”

Wooyeon asked, frowning, as if to say, what the hell? Dohyun shrugged and replied nonchalantly.

“It's broken.”

When he checked it in the morning, the phone had no power. Well, it'd be strange if it didn't break when he threw it like that. It was one thing that the phone wasn't ringing, but it was even stranger that the alarm hadn't gone off.

“You just fixed it yesterday. What happened?”

“Just...”

Dohyun trailed off, as he always did. Wooyeon gave him a look that said, 'You're not going to tell me again'. He didn't want to look foolish. Dohyun awkwardly looked away and gripped the strap of his bag tighter.

“...I threw it.”

"What?"

"I threw it because I was angry..."

“....”

“It won't turn on.”

He could feel his stare. A stare of shock and bewilderment. Wooyeon muttered in disbelief.

“No, I mean why...”

Instead of adding an excuse, Dohyun reached out for Wooyeon's hand. Out of habit, Wooyeon grabbed his. After a slight pause he withdrew his hand unnaturally.

“....”

An awkward atmosphere fell. Everyone had already left the room, and there was no one else there except Dohyun and Wooyeon. Wooyeon pulled down the brim of his hat with a complicated expression.

"...Let's go, for lunch."

next chapter

#alphatraumalntranslation #alpha trauma #chapter 79

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