#the bats are freaking out back in gotham

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

"Oh my god." The kid muttered, pacing back and forth in front of the summoning circle anxiously as he clutched some old book to his chest, "Oh my god, I just killed Nightwing."

"Uh," Nightwind started to speak, but didn't get far.

"Oh my god, my dad is Nightwing!"

"Wait, what?!"

That seemed to catch the boys attention and...yeah the kid looked a lot like he did as a teen. "I, uh" The kid rubbed the back of his neck nervously, "I'm kinda your clone. My parents made me and told me recently about how I was born and I wanted to meet you!"

He threw his hands up in the air, one hand still clasping the book, "They told me you were dead, so I tried to summon your ghost! I swear I didn't know!" This seemed to switch him back into whatever spiral ge was in before, "Oh god, I killed my own father."

Dick hurried to speak before he lost the chance again, "I'm probably still alive."

"Huh?" The kid looked over at him, a hint of hope in his features

"Yeah," Nightwing shrugged, "some other bats were with me. They're trained to keep my vitals up until they can get me back to the cave. Plus, I felt my soul pulled out of my body by force. I don't think you actually stopped anything from functioning."

The kid sagged with relief, "So batman isn't going to murder me?"

An odd sound came from within the summoning circle as Nightwing covered his mouth

"Are you laughing at me?! I'm being serious!"

This time, the vigilante made no move to hide his laughter, "We don't kill kiddo, besides he probably won't maul his own grandkid, right?"

Unfortunately this gave the kid something new to spiral over, "Oh god, my grandpa is Batman."

"How about we start over?" The bluebird asked, "I'm Nightwing, what's your name?"

"Um, Danny. Danny Fenton."

Dick gave an award winning smile, "Nice to meet you, Danny. Could you break the circle so I can get out?"

[welcometogrouchland]

my Stephanie Brown hot take is that she should get mad bitches now that she's single in comics. Yes yes shipping BUT the one time she had sex she was punished by the narrative via teen pregnancy. I think she should be allowed to have as much sex as she wants with zero consequences. Could be a lot of sex, could be a little. Point is she should get to do it without getting narratively baby trapped this time. she should get them pregnant, actually.

[bluerosefox]

Todd and Phantom, Mostly Ghostly Shenanigans

That one Danny Phantom episode “Life Lessons” but its Phantom and Jason Todd tied together in the Ghost Zone.

Danny is confused why he’s tied to Jason and trying not to detransform while navigating the Ghost Zone and avoiding some of his enemies (They do stage another jailbreak after getting caught by Walker and steal Johnny 13 bike during the adventure) but Danny debates on making a detour to the Far Frozen to get Jason looked at, he doesn’t know whats making this random dude feel like he bathed in sewer water for a year but whatever it is should get looked at. Oh, and due to some reason his powers are on the fritz as well for a while (maybe due to a misfire from one his parents machines? Maybe the cuffs are shorting his powers out? or maybe Danny’s going through like a ghost growth spurt)

Jason on the other hand is trying not to freak out that he’s in the land of the dead basically and tied to some ghost guy. Last thing he remembers was trying to fight some green flaming Mohawk metal guy saying he is “a rare prize” and will be hunted for sport along side with his other rare quarry (The Most Dangerous Game much dude) before being knocked out and waking up in what is apparently the Ghost Zone. He’s also gotta pretend to be civilian Jason Todd as well. He doesn’t have any of his Red Hood stuff.

Basically they both try to keep their real identities a secret (doesn’t last long tbh) and get into some shenanigans in the Zone while on the run from Skulker and other of Danny’s rouges.     

[gaywineauntsstuff]

Sometimes I feel like us as the bat family fandom forget how starry eyed people get about Nightwing canonically.

Because with the exception of early era Tim most of the Batkids are like. lol that’s my loser older brother or some variation of yeah…he’s some guy I guess? He helps me with homework?

And Nightwing is the canonically a center of multiversal light.

When Heroes meet Nightwing they do the vigorous handshake and the “it’s an honor to meet you sir, I have heard so much about you oh my god”

There are so many character where they are literally shown giggling and kicking their feet whenever Nightwing talks to them.

Even the people who don’t have the celebrity level worship of him respect the hell out of him and call him as soon as they need help.

From raven to Starfire to Superman to Superboy to all or the flashes there is so much respect and awe given to this one dude.

And it is deserved

But imagine you are Damian Wayne and you’ve been working with what 90% of the people you’ve met (all bats) have been calling an embarrassment to your father’s legacy.

Your mother hates him and your Grandfather doesn’t feel that strongly about him.

The red hood calls him an embarrassment and a coward and he couldn’t even keep Red Robin from running away.

Your father tells him that he never should have been Batman

And you’ve worked with him and you know what you think everyone is full of shit about him and you and him the new Batman and Robin are the best no matter what anyone says.

And fuck it the fact he keeps going in a suit that everyone tells him he’s not good enough for is scratching something in your brain that you’re refusing to acknowledge because why would you feel that way? You are the circus freak have nothing in common (shut up)

And then you meet the justice league and all the extended teams.

And people are falling over themselves to listen to a word out of your brothers, your Batman’s mouth. They wait for a nod or headshake and dictate decades worth of planning on it.

Both Drake and Todd’s hero teams ask him for advice with or without their designated bats presence.

The man of steel asks for child rearing advice and wonder woman cracks a joke about a spar

Newer heroes whisper about him in the halls

He’s literally your favorite hero’s favorite hero

And it’s breaking Damian’s Brain

Because well… he kinda gets slapped around in Gotham. He’s the butt of half the jokes the other Batkids make and Dick just smiles and takes it.

The rogues have a bounty on nightwings ass and he gets leered at by goons, rogues, civilians and anti-hero’s alike and he doesn’t say anything.

He lets oracle crack jokes about a pretty face and having to do everything herself

Let’s Jason run the alley despite the fact that apparently he knows how to take it back

Apparently he’s had 12 people tailing Drake since Paris and despite being the man Ra’s Al Ghul calls detective has yet to notice. (Because you can’t tell me Dick was just magically at the right place to catch Tim falling to his death on coincidence)

And necessary to peace talks because he’s the best they have at deescalation

Like imagine you are a child who was raised to believe power is this obvious, all consuming thing. That the ones who control the board are visibly larger than life figures who fought their way to the top and cling to power by even the thinnest hangnail if they had to.

People who ignore simpler morals or an overall greater goal or good

And then you’re taken in by the man who whispers the correct answers into the larger than life figures ear.

Like I feel like that would have such an impact because Dick didn’t take power from anyone to reach his goals, it’s why his siblings don’t really defer to him unless in crisis.

Dick didn’t take power, no people just looked at him and decided he was the best option to give it to.

Everyone basically looked at this kid and went, yeah you’re the future of all heroism.

And if that dude can’t even get Bruce Wayne’s respect what chance does Damian Wayne have

[writerfromthestars]

DP X DC PROMT: Happiness? In this Economy?

Dick convinces Jason to go with him to a party because he apparently "needs to socialize". At this party is also Danny, who is majoring in astrophysics at Gotham University. They run into each other, hit it off, and end up hooking up.

Danny has class in the morning, so he leaves before Jason wakes up, hurrying to get his day started and completely unaware of the fact that some of the ectoplasm he produces has seeped into Jason. (Neither of them tell each other their names, or maybe they're too hungover to remember? Idk, but they don't know each others names. It was also too dark for Jason to see Danny's face.)

Jason wakes up, wondering how the hell the cute guy from last night managed to leave without waking him up. He also feels happier than he has in a while, which he attributes to the fact that he actually had fun last night instead of scowling in the corner.

But the happiness, the calm, it just... Doesn't leave? For some reason?

At first, Jason is willing to accept that maybe the univers is just giving him a day off from the Pit Rage, God knows he's earned it, but when the end of the week is drawing closer and he's still no closer to figuring out why he's so goddamn pleasant all of a sudden, he starts to freak out.

He tracks this unnatural calm back to the party, and at first, he thinks someone spiked his drink. But the only people who were close enough to do that would be Dick, who would never do that, and his unknown, unnamed hookup.

Now, Jason isn't a very paranoid person, but he was raised during his early teens by the goddamn Batman, king of paranoia, so he immediately draws the following connections:

1. His unnamed hookup was able to roofie him without him noticing, bat training and all.

2. That drug, whatever it was, was strong enough to subdue the Pit Rage, and, seeing as it hasn't returned, that could be indefinite.

3. The only person who has ever been able to remotely control the Lazarus Pits is Ra's Al Ghul, and he still ended up a murderous sociopath, so obviously he doesn't have a good handle on it.

4. This random dude that he met at a goddamn college party may be the most powerful sorcerer in the world.

5. He need sto find this guy before she raises an undead army.

Thus, Jason finds himself in the awkward situation of explaining to his father that he may or may not have hooked up with a being more powerful than a man who runs an assassin cult and calls himself a demon.

The bats immediately begin searching Gotham for this guy, pulling out all the stops to stop this guy before they gain a new supervillain.

Meanwhile, Danny is peacefully going about his life.

Then, he runs into his one night stand and they start dating. Everything is going great for him! Moving to Gotham City was the best thing he's ever done!

Now Jason is even more panicked, because he just met this really cute guy, and now they're dating, but it's a horrible time because he's still trying to find this Eldritch creature.

Bonus ( to add to the misunderstandings):

Say Danny's trans. It's about now, a few months later, that morning sickness makes itself evident.

[flwrkid14]

Casual Chaos: Tim Drake’s Makeup Stream

Danny, known to the internet as Nebula, had been teasing a special stream for weeks. Fans were buzzing with excitement and theories, especially when the announcement popped up: “Doing My Boyfriend’s Makeup!” Naturally, the chat erupted into chaos. Danny was pretty private about his love life, so this reveal had the fandom on edge.

When the stream finally went live, Danny greeted his audience with his usual laid-back grin. “Okay, today’s the day. Let’s see if I’m any good at this,” he said, spinning a makeup brush between his fingers. “But first, let me introduce you to my boyfriend.”

The camera panned, and there he was—Tim Drake, sitting there as if this was the most normal thing in the world. No big introduction, no fanfare. Just Tim, giving a small, nonchalant wave.

“WAIT. IS THAT TIM DRAKE???”

“Like… THE Tim Drake??”

“No way he’s dating Nebula, what is happening???”

Danny, fully aware of the chaos brewing in the comments, didn’t even acknowledge it. He just turned to Tim. “Ready for your makeover, babe?”

Tim shrugged, totally calm. “Let’s do it.”

As Danny started applying makeup, the chat kept freaking out, but the two of them acted like it was just another Saturday. In Gotham, though, it was a different story. The Bat's group chat was blowing up:

Dick: “TIMOTHY JACKSON DRAKE-WAYNE, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.”

Jason: “How does a nerd like you land Nebula of all people???”

Steph: “I AM CRYING. HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?!!”

Damian: “This is unacceptable. Drake, I demand an explanation.”

Bruce: [Typing…]

But Tim? Unfazed. He ignored the constant buzzing of his phone and sat still as Danny carefully lined his eyes and added a touch of mascara, keeping up casual chatter with the stream.

“You know,” Danny said, holding up a shade of lipstick, “Tim’s got this effortless model thing going on. I’m just enhancing what’s already there.”

Tim raised an eyebrow, smirking. “I didn’t exactly sign up to be your runway star.”

“Wait… he’s actually REALLY pretty??”

“Tim Drake is hot, confirmed.”

“LOOK AT HIS CHEEKBONES OMG.”

As Danny finished the look, adding some extra blush and a light gloss, the reaction was immediate. The chat was losing it. Tim glanced at himself in the mirror, barely reacting. “Well… I don’t hate it.”

Danny leaned back, admiring his work. “Not bad, right?”

Meanwhile, back in Gotham, the bats were still going wild.

Steph: “Tim, you better show up to every gala looking like this from now on.”

Jason: “You’ve been holding out on us with this face, man.”

Dick: “This is ICONIC.”

Bruce: “We’ll need to discuss this later.”

Tim finally glanced at his phone and snorted at all the messages. “They’re never going to let this go, are they?”

Danny just grinned at the camera. “Probably not. So… next time, you'll do my makeup, right?”

The chat, of course, exploded all over again.

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

AU where Jason comes back to Gotham and begins his plan to confront Batman and all that. Except after only like a week the Joker gets hit by a bus and then shot by a little old lady with a shotgun and dies.

Jason’s plan is now in shambles because the dramatic climax of his plan is no longer possible. But that’s fine. He’ll think of some other suitable alternative. Granted, it’s not quite the same if he uses some other villain. Making Batman choose doesn’t mean nearly as much when it’s not about the person who killed him.

And really, is he going to try and get Batman to kill Black Mask or something? Scarecrow? Red Hood is competent; he could do it himself so why bother.

So Jason lays low continues to build his criminal empire with astounding speed and efficiency. If only he could think of a good way to announce his return. Nothing he can think of is dramatic enough.

Meanwhile, the Bats are freaking out because who is this guy that’s taken over half of the Gotham underworld in like a month? He’s obviously trained, but they just can’t seem to get any information on who he is or where he came from. It is beyond frustrating.

After a few months Jason is frustrated that he just can’t seem to find any dramatic good way of making Batman prove himself. It has to be something big! Something magnificent!

During his weekly chat with Talia he complains about his problems and she suggests he come back for a visit. He argues that he can’t just leave, but she says if he has competent enough lieutenants it’d be fine. He spends the next three weeks making sure that everything will be fine if he leaves for a week. He will not have all of his hard work falling apart and going to waste due to incompetence. Absolutely not.

So then once his lieutenants are sufficiently prepared (and the rest of Gotham’s criminal element sufficiently cowed), he heads to Nanda Parbat, only to find Ra’s on the phone with Bruce, who is demanding to know if the Red Hood has any affiliation with the league.

Oh. Oh. He can give them affiliation.

A new plan begins to form.

He’s going to be the most affiliated he can be. Jason immediately goes to Talia with his newest plan: Overthrow Ra’s and takeover the league. Talia whips out her forty step outline for overthrowing Ra’s and tells Jason she’s so proud of him.

Jason has a new goal now, so he gets to work. He checks on things in Gotham, but everything seems to be fine and there haven’t been any unplanned explosions so it should be fine if he stays here for a bit.

Taking over Gotham really was good practice, as it turns out. Thanks to Talia’s plans and previous foundational efforts the takeover happens in no time.

Meanwhile the bats are still freaking out. Red Hood hasn’t been seen in three weeks, he may or may not have league of assassins connections, and even in his absence his goons seem to be managing things competently.

Back in Nanda Parbat, Jason and Talia finish their takeover. And now, finally, he’s ready to confront Batman.

He arrives in Gotham as the new head of the league. His arrival is loud, elaborate, and dramatic enough to fulfill his inner theater kid’s dreams.

Batman is speechless. And not his usual grunts instead of words, but actual surprised speechless. Jason is alive?!?!?!?

Jason was not expecting all the tears. And hugs. And mother henning. Goodness gracious, this was not part of the plan.

Bruce is obviously struggling with Jason’s revelation that he took over the league, but the newest little birdie seems almost relieved at that(?) and Dick and Alfred both seem strangely proud. Whatever. Even Bruce seems to be at least mostly ignoring that for now.

Then someone asks him if he knows Red Hood. Jason blinks. Says that yeah, he knows Red Hood. Everyone seems to ease at that. One mystery solved. Jason quickly realizes that most of them have no idea he is Red Hood. Cass seems to be the only exception but also appears amused and willing enough to not mention it.

Dramatic appearance complete, Jason now has a new goal: see how long he can keep the bats (minus Cass and potentially Alfred) in the dark about his crime boss identity.

He will bribe Cass as much as it takes to keep her on board with the causing chaos plan, but she seems eager enough. Favorite sibling status definitely unlocked. (The whole killing thing is fought over at great length and a truce of sorts is eventually made)

David Cain is never heard from again.

Damian shows up at some point.

At least one league member has suddenly found themselves as an HR rep for Gotham criminals? They’re still not quite sure how that happened.

[cardinalcheerio]

I imagine that the Batkids go out for food every once in a while.

So there they are all sitting at the restaurant, when dick goes to pay and accidentally uses one of Bruce's cards.

They get back to the cave to bruce freaking out, everyone is like "IDENTITY BREACH AHHHHH" y'know.

And the next day a paper comes out, "Bats steal Brucies Credit Card!"

From then on they use Bruce's cards for snacks in the field and gotham just accepts that

1. Bruce funds the Bats

2. They take it from him

3. Bruce and Batman dated and Batman stole his credit cards and gave them to his kids.

[adreamfromnevermore]

Headcanon that the Bats must be the most infuriating members of the justice league. And it's got nothing to do with what they do or don't know or even their general skills and egos. Everyone is very used to Batman and the expectation that him and any of his spawn are somehow going to be three steps ahead of any issue they bring to the table ever.

No no, the infuriating bit? The stalking.

Listen, this is a family of freaks and weirdos. They work so well together because none of them were normal to start with and then they ended up traumatized. It's practically common practice in that family to accept that nothing is what it seems at face value and that all of your siblings are attempting to pry into your private life and cases at any given moment. I think for them it's honestly weirder if you take what they say at face value. They speak a language holy separate from any normally socialized person and it is a language of lies and half-truths that relies on the assumption that all parties are aware of that.

They're the most infuriating bitches around.

They'll tell someone something and appear to do the opposite and when confronted will have the most convoluted but sound reasoning of why they actually did exactly as they promised too.

They regularly pick people's pockets and hack into personal information because for them? That's practically a love language. They're obnoxious and they aren't even aware of it. Someone asks them to just tell the truth and they react like they've been shot. They're probably offended when they realize that someone hasn't been at least attempting to dig into them back, like come on man. I thought we were friends but you didn't even Google how long Nightwings been around? We've already put the bar on the floor for you guys? My siblings already have a full dossier ready on you because they caught us on camera in your home city during that 2 minute conversation we had 3 months ago. They sent it to me a few hours later. I think they got Oracle to help cause usually it takes them at least 12 hours.

You think they're being nice and friendly and then you realize that they have a nice little file compiled of everything you've done in the last five years, where you went to school and every note your teachers ever made about your behavior a decade ago when you were still a high schooler and fairly normal. If asked they'd probably be willing to bring out the family tree they built for you. They know what you did last summer better than you know what you did last summer. They have pictures, pictures that should be impossible because there's no way they were stalking you then and those sure don't look like security camera footage.

In reality Bats and Superman get along so well because that man is an investigative journalist and when they first met he could not leave it alone. Bruce was charmed the first time Clark Kent started doggedly attempting to ask him if he knew anything about Gothams new cryptid. It was cute how off base he was. But he was trying!!!! Bruce was sold for life! He dropped an dossier on lexcorp off in Clarks apartment a few days later. As a gift.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Rejected Soulmate au where the bats discover a way to track Phantom. This leads to an all out brawl between the bats and Phantom, who is badly losing. In his attempt to escape he pulls out a portal gun to the ghost zone and fires it.

Things get out of hand, and he and Nightwing end up stranded in Hyrule and continue during it out, only to be interrupted by a castle in the distance being...lifted up into the sky???

Things happen in quick succession, they nearly get trampled by wild horses running in a panic, a bunch of caves appear along with an opening in the ground packed with red goo, and they get attacked by a weird evil goo monster in the form of a bunch of hands. Phantom ends up badly hurt and powers down to Fenton, shocking Nightwing and he has to carry the teen to safety as they flee the glowing mummy the hands had turned into after being defeated.

Nightwing is having a bad day.

[radioactive-zafiro60]

Batfam + JL (where the Justice League finds out about the Batfam by accident)

To long for a one-shot but not really a micro-fic, anyway ENJOY:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a virtual meeting with the LJ Batman "disconnects" the camera... Except he does something wrong and now he thinks none can see or hear him but everyone on the JL it's watching him in the Batcave from a huge screen.

Wonder Woman: Maybe we should tell him... Or at least turn the tv off...

Flash: WAIT!!! Don't you wanna know what the bat does when he thinks nobody is watching????

Superman (trying not to sound to enthusiastic): Well maybe we could just take a quick look... :)

Here is a list of things the JL saw or found out because of this:

1) Batman taking off most of his armour and his mask and start working in some case in his desk in front of the computer (the angle of the cámara doesn't let see his face not OH GOD it lets se his huge pecs and arms in nothing but a gray underwear shirt

Flash: Well LOOK AT THAT, I always knew he was well build but that's a great look in so many ways

Green Lantern: No shit... This is making me realize some things about myself

Wonder Woman: ... I have better arms

Superman (2 seconds about to have a stroke): oh yea... Well... I'm just gonna... *Takes a picture with his phone*

2) A general panic gets on the JL when a dark skinned toddler enters the screen and tries to climb THE BATMAN

*Through the screen*

Toddler Duke pulling Batman's arm: *baby noises*

Batman looking away from his work to see the kid (his face still not visible on the camera): Oh hello chum, what are you doing here?

The JL incredibly confused and estranged because of that sweet voice they NEVER heard before:

Batman pulling Dukes up and carrying him on his chest while he keeps working: It's ok baby, your siblings we'll be back soon

The LJ:

Flash: HE'S A FATHER??!!!

Wonder Woman: this actually explains a lot of things

Superman (with his heart about to physically melt): ...oh... That's cute

3) A sassy teenager arriving home

Batman, still with the kid on top of him and still working, when a black haired boy enters the screen and throws a backpack on the ground

Batman: How was school?

Tim, annoyed: Boring, they keep teaching me thins I already know

Batman: Well what do you wanna learn about?

Tim (pulling a bunch of folders and papers out of his school bag): The Gotham strangulator...

Batman:...

Batman (surprisingly calm) : Did you steal a case from my desk?

Tim: I solved a case from your desk, you welcome

Batman (sighing): ok fine, put it with the others you solve that I have to present to the JL next week

Tim (putting in the desk a huge bunch of archives): oki doki

Flash: Wait so a kid do his paperwork????

Marcian: Wait so a kid SOLVES his cases???

Wonder Woman: Do you think that maybe is Robin? I mean I have never seen him from close but it could be...

Superman: I honestly need a brake

Batman *standing up with Duke on arms*: I'm gonna put your brother to sleep DONT DO ANYTHING

Tim (without even looking up from his phone): mhmh...

4) After a while of just watching Tim on his phone a little menace decides to show up

Tim (on his phone not paying attention):

Litle Damian arriving and standing with a straight face in front of the computer:

Flash (a little bit terrified): Can he see us??!!!

Wonder Woman: He shouldn't be able... But if that's Batman's kid, who knows

Damian (with the most serious voice a 8 year old can make): Computer, show me funny videos of cats

The computer *unresponding*

Tim: Dad told you not to play with the computer

Damian: Well father is not here right now, and if you tell him I'll tell him you just call him "dad"

Tim: no I didn't!

Damian: yes you did!

Tim: he's just my legal guardian!!!

Damian: But you call him dad just now!!!

Tim: you...

*Tim and Damian fighting and rolling in the floor*

Aquaman: oh so this is what having siblings is like?...

Superman: IS THAT A FREAKING COW??!!

*Batcow on the back of the image watching the kids fight without giving a fuck*

Wonder Woman: IS THAT A SWORD??!!!!

*Also Damian pulling a sword put of nothing to fight Tim and the JL freaking out*

*A teenage girl appears out of nowhere and grabs Damian as if it was nothing*

Cass: What are you even doing?!

5) A terrifying ballerina scolds her brothers (by this point the JL already has popcorns and bets on the table)

This ballerina girl who magically appears and stops the little psico stares at them in confusion

Cass: Why are you even fighting about???

Tim: None of your business

Damian: Timothy is a jerk

Cass: I already know that

*A notice from the computer catches everybody's attention*

(Batman calling them from the computer in a way the JL can only hear his voice but the kids and Batman can definitely see each other)

Batman *on the speaker phone*: Why is everyone at home so early?

Cass: My ballet class is over

Damian: I didn't go to school today, I didn't want to

Batman (exasperated): We will discuss this later, I had to go out there is an emergency in the city, DONT GO OUT! DONT KILL EACH OTHER! AND DAMIAN GET THAT COW OUT OF THE BATCAVE

Damian: But what if something happens to her???!!!!

Cass: Hate to interrupt but I have a good and a bad new

Batman: Just go ahead with the good news

Cass: I GOT A ROLE IN THE NUTCRACKER!!!

Batman (who has no idea what the Nutcracker is about but is trying to be a supportive father) : Honey that's great!! Are you gonna be some pretty candy princess or something?

Cass (who is actually gona be the rat king and is really excited about it): sure... Wana hear the bad news??

Batman: shot

Cass: Jayson is in jail

Batman:

Cass: Again

Tim and Damian trying not to laugh:

Batman: that's it *pointing to Tim* ho upstairs and babysit your brother, Cassandra and Damian I want you out of the Batcave until I'm back and someone call Richard so he can get your brother out of jail

*The JL losing their shit in confusion and laug*

+

Batman eventually finds out about this little incident but decides to ignore it and pretend it never happened. The LJ is amused

[novelistwriter]

A Phantom of a Bat

DP x DC Prompt

Tucker had noticed something different about Danny. He's been acting more seriously, not making as much puns, and is generally getting smarter and better at dodging attacks without using his powers. Tucker also noticed that Danny is spending more time in the Ghost Zone than before.

So, as a good friend who is concerned for his best friend, he stalks Danny in the Ghost Zone. But what he finds is shocking, Danny is learning how to fight, solve crime, and improvise under the freaking BATMAN. But it shouldn't be possible, as Batman is still alive and well in Gotham. So, with his smarts, he concluded that Danny is learning under the Spirit of Batman, a Neverborn that was in the Ghost Zone, but the Gotham that the Spirit if Batman is looking over doesn't look like the Gotham he knows, it looks... more sinister, and has some buildings that aren't in the real world Gotham, like Lex Corp, Queen Industries, it has those buildings and other newer buildings that are being built over old ones, and the most ominous thing he's noticed is a big Arkham Asylum looming over the Gotham of the Ghost Zone. He concluded that this is a Batman and a Ghost Zone equivalent of the Gotham of a different timeline. He's heard before that the Ghost Zone can connect to different timelines, and with Danny's luck, it was bound to happen.

Tucker was building up his courage to ask Danny about his more frequent visits to the Zone a few days later. Because this is obviously a big secret Danny had kept from him, Sam had slowly drifted away from them when her and Danny broke up. They just weren't meant for each other.

And then something very bad happens. Either the GIW becomes more competent or the Fentons find out about Danny's Ghostly half and attack him. And now Danny is missing after telling Tucker over the phone about what happened while running away.

Maybe Tucker should contact his aunt on his mom's side, who is a high ranking Government Official who has worked with and told him herself the deeds of the Bat to help him get his best friend back. So he frantically searches for his phone that his aunt got him and dials the number she had him memorize and waits. And when she finally picks up, he lets out a sigh of relief.

"Amanda Waller speaking"

(Kinda surprised no one commented that Danny is learning under the Spirit of Arkham Batman)

[gaywineauntsstuff]

Listen I love the ‘dicks being ostracized from his family and self destructs’ trope in fics however

I would like an inverse just once (I could write it but I want this fic to be good so I can enjoy it and I am not the greatest writer) where everyone blows up at him and flat out lays into him and he just goes… okay… if that’s how you feel?

Takes himself off of the patrol routes and rosters. He’s off the emergency calls and his ‘call for city wide emergency’ has been down graded to ‘call for world wide emergency’ he’s no longer on comms with oracle

He stops offering assistance to the other kids teams, doesn’t send info for investigation and doesn’t go within 100feet of Gotham.

Takes himself off the den-mother, baby sitter, trainer for all the younger teams lost that involve any and all bats

In the beginning he vacates his apartment and temporarily moves in with Donna in New York and things are good because of course they are. They’re Dick and Donna a world doesn’t exist where they aren’t okay.

And then his presence in New York leads to a lot of the og core five titans interacting and they realize that they miss each other like hell and start to work together more and more. Until news sites are like ‘teen titans grown up??’ ‘Original titans spotted doing hurricane aid in Florida!’

Because Dick loves his family but he knows when to bow out. And he chose the family he made in the new teen titans.

And then one day one of the bats track him down in nyc and breaks into what is now Dick and Donna’s apartment and are ready to argue that they need him back and need him there for a huge Gotham wide event.

And Dick says ‘sure okay let me get my stuff and we leave in half and hour’ as soon as the first sentence is out

No convincing or begging or asking for money (cough Jason cough)

Dick is patched into their comms and he’s working efficiently except he’s not… acting like himself.

He’s collaborating with whoever they tell him too, no problem, he’s discussing ideal plans and co-ops and teams and how to best get it under control.

But he’s talking to them the way he talks when he’s offering aid to teams he’s not a part of.

Like the hero version of an acquaintance and no one can call him out on it because he’s doing good work. Work that’s on par with his work before this whole fiasco. He explicitly isn’t letting their personal issues affect his work.

He’s speaking but not talking

And Bruce remembers this… he’s probably the only one who does because last time he was the only one included. The last time Dick acted like this is when he first visited Jason and him after he had been fired.

Whenever Bruce was in the room and Dick was forced to speak with him, the conversation never strayed past business casual especially around Jason.

Batman and Nightwing got into screaming matches

Bruce and Dick were strangers

And now they’re back to this, 7 kids later, a million ends of the world stopped, they’ve bled together, cried together and clung to each other in pure relief after they managed to clutch victory.

And Nightwing was treating Batman Inc like a new team stepping onto the scene.

Once they’ve secured everything and managed to keep Bruce from self destructing and making it worse. Dick just leaves and tells oracle that he’ll send over his debrief in 3-5 business days and it was nice working with them.

And then he’s gone

No cave, no manor, no Alfred, no med-bay because Dick doesn’t stay places he’s not welcome.

And after they all talk about that and how weird it was and Bruce reveals Dick did this before when he was Nightwing after Bruce fired, where Dick Grayson didn’t know Bruce Wayne.

And one of the kids asks when he broke and stopped the act and Bruce just says ‘the day he found out Jason died’

And the Batkids kinda freak bc what do you mean?? What is he only going to come back when someone dies? Thats not? There has to be another way?? And Bruce is like yeah no idea sorry (bc he’s helpful like that)

So then Steph the next day resolves to go visit him, Tim isn’t the only professional stalker. And she finds Dick and Donna’s apartment and well it’s daylight and she’s in civvies she’s if she climbs in through the window she might get reported to the NYPD and she doesn’t wanna get arrested or shot to door it is!

And so she goes and knocks and Dick opens the door and just lights up

Something something this is such a nice surprise something something it’s so good to see you.

Dick had taught Donna how to make some of his mother recipes when they were kids. So now whenever they’re together for a long time they cook together.

So Dick who is usually living in a cluttered apartment with no clean dishes and an exclusively grab and go food is now trying to force feed her some of his cooking.

Because he picked up the habit again since he’s the better cook between him and Donna.

And it’s delicious and he wants to catch up and hear everything that’s going on in her life, is she working with new people, dating anyone? How is her relationship with her mother etc etc.

It’s a nice day and she stays late and never confronts him on anything until she sees how long ago the sun set and she needs to get moving.

He hands her paper with his number and makes her promise not to give it to the others or she will lose access to it, he offers to help her on a conditional basis as nightwing but only her, she can call him about the rest if it’s an end of the world or they’re near death and need immediate aid.

And that’s like the fic because the key to winning nightwings assistance is like breathing (optional) but if you’re Dicks family you have to care or else. He’ll love you and help you, when you need it but he won’t tie his life up with yours, he’ll spend his time with people who value his opinion and the person behind the mask.

Anyway cue all the Batkids trying to do what Steph did and fail because they’re neurotic shits who think bonding involves doing casework together or a steak out.

(The next person to crack it is Damian, completely unintentionally he has a fight with Bruce and can’t ask him how the fuck he’s supposed to solve this equation in the new stupid way they’re teaching him no he can’t use the old method they’re supposed to show their work so he pulls up to Dick and Donna’s in a ratty ass hoodie like plz wtf do you mean you work top down explain Grayson- and dicks like awww no problem kid)

[methoughtsphantom]

Jason “my family doesn’t know im alive” Todd and Danny “my family doesn’t know I’m dead” Fenton going alongside each of their plans my beloved. like Danny will absolutely go head-to-head with all of Gotham to support his new best friend on all his crime lord endeavors while he drags Jason to also attend collage with him. They are roommates and there never seems to a mention of family from either side. It’s an unspoken understanding they have. They met because Crime alley as a ghost lair thrummed with so much loneliness, it was at first the perfect place for Danny to hide his ecto signature in. But then he saw the dumbass whose lair it was lean his motorcycle just a tad too much when making a sharp turn to an alley, he sweeped the floor through a lifted chain link that passed his body but not his helmet. Yep that’s right the red thing got stuck. Danny who at the moment happened to be watching through his window snorted. Much to his horror because if not a ghost that dude could’ve gotten his head flung off.

Still, the scene was ridiculous.

On a whim he irrationally sees the police closing in on the guy and panicked at the thought of the guy using intangibility to free himself so Danny phased them both through his apartment wall and left the guy sprawled in his couch. Jason didn’t freak out but that’s normal when one’s got a concussion, one the guy immediately denied having as Danny laid out the medical supplies. The idiot proceeded to almost flatten four steps to the door with his stubbornness. He also said “I’m asexual” in the most deadpan voice as Danny dropped him back in the couch.

Danny sighed. Clearly though, he’d done so too early in the night because the guy kept trying to go, kept trying to knock Danny out, kept trying to slash him with knifes Danny didn’t know he had stashed. He’d only disarmed the guy from his guns. The visible ones apparently, cause at one point the guy did take out a gun and shoot until the ammo ran out and then teetered the thing like it was an art prop and hit his moon lamp.

Danny "yeah you aren’t officially my friend until you’ve tried to kill me" fenton my guys.

Anyways both keep having the same argument over if Danny technically kidnapped Jason or not. Danny holds the fact that the police at least didn’t see the guy make the ridicule. Jason argued that happened cause he was sporting a concussion. Danny argued he got that after.

Jason at first thinks the guy's a meta, but no. Danny introduces himself, sheepily now that he recognizes this is who the lair he invaded is from. He bandages him and tries to cook for him. If Danny didn’t have ice powers he most certainly would’ve burned the apartment. Jason then proceeds to kick him out of his own kitchen and make them both enchiladas. It’s the most normal both had in a while with another person and the air seems oddly settled. From then on, Jason constantly invited himself over, under the pretense that this was his territory and therefore he could drop in unannounced. Danny who has actual powers says he only allows this because Jason cooks very well.

Danny stays away from the crime fighting business unless his buddy is in deep shit he can’t get himself out. Also it’s Danny’s turn to cover for his vigilante friend which Sam and Tucker give him so much shit for. (but also advice)

And they were roommates. (omg) Danny effectively derails Jason’s big comeback plans by casually dropping ghost lore every two days. Like,

Jason, talking about how he doesn’t want Bats snooping on his territory:

Danny: Just don’t let them in

Jason: ??

Danny: yeah!! Hasn’t Batman died and got revived??? You can totally kick out death touched people you don’t want entering on your lair.

Jason: …I can?

Danny: Yep dude, your lair’s supposed to feel safe.

Jason: wait does that mean I can kick you out?

Danny: First this is my apartment. Second, im dead, not dead touched. Third, it’s too late to get rid of me. bitch.

Anyways Jason is super excited. You mean to tell him he can actually deny people over to his territory haunt?? (Yes it’s only to people who have died and came back but still!! The sample size is exactly the type of people he doesn’t want to see—!)

Joker my beloathed can’t step foot in Crime Alley.

(Jason’d feel a lot safer if the clown was dead but the possibility of his murderer turning into a ghost and their little loophole not applying on the clown is too scary to contemplate.)

Anyways, Jason loves experimenting with the power. It can go from simply making people shudder and not want to enter crime Alley to straight up not letting them enter like there’s an invisible wall blocking the way.

Jason because he’s hurt that Bruce never even patrols Crime Alley and also because he’s petty put B under the category of “invisible wall” blacklist. His reasoning is that the man doesn’t even attempt to enter Crime Alley. To him it’s surely just a place shadowed in tragedy. (anyways that’s it’s the place he met Jason)

Ironically, Jason totally forgets that Batman does venture into Crime Alley one day in the whole year. The day he met Jason.

Okay. He didn’t forget at first. The first year Jason remembers cause it was only a few months till then but then the next— Jason forgets that today’s the anniversary of the day’s Bruce’s parents died. He forgets to allow B in when he feels a slight tug and dismiss the feeling that prompts Bruce to investigate because he literally can’t enter Crime Alley. He starts the trialsTM, he scouts on the very edge and sees people the whole day enter and get out and cross with no problem but Bruce can’t.

It’s literally just Bruce.

Time to call Constantine, i guess.

[z0mbiezbite]

Modern Dedication (Draft)

Yandere Gotham x M!reader

Warning: these fanfic are gonna be for freaks by freaks. Also bad spelling and punctuation - this was posted for I can weed out anything unnecessary.

(Y/n) pulled a pack of Marlboros from inside his suit pocket. “Cigarette?”

A person was by his desk with a body of a battle axe and a cape that pools like a melted candle - Batman. chitty chitty bang bang, Batman. “The Joker, where is he?

(Y/n) struck the cigarette in his mouth, disinterested, “I’m not his keeper, babes.”

“A week before he escapes, the only outgoing mail he sends is addressed to you.” He said, and threw a stack of letters on (Y/n)’s desk - unintelligible and informal.

It was hardly evidence of anything. It only stressed that (Y/n) is one of the few who put up with the Joker’s insanity and Batman knew it. He had a sinking suspicion, Vengeance came for a different reason.

Quite foolishly, (Y/n) asked “Is a client not allowed to talk to their lawyer?” As his cigarette smoke blew over his shoulders like a locomotive.

"Your client is about to commit a crime. Legal confidentiality doesn’t protect you here.” Of course like all things that had to do with the Joker, the letters were incriminating.

Resigning himself, (Y/n) crossed his legs and pinched the bridge of his nose, “And you want me to...”

“Find him. He responds to you.” His voice held a slightly accusatory tone.

“Gross. Why’d you phrase it like that?”

“(Y/n).” Batman studied him with steal eyebrow only given to seasoned detectives. (Y/n) could practically feel Batman’s palpating anger.

Truthfully, (Y/n) didn’t find his particular reason a big deal, people die everyday whether from a stroke or strangulation from a clown. However, he knew Batman roughly cared and that was enough to throw a dog a bone.

“Alright, Alright.” (Y/n) held up a conciliatory palm. He reached for a pen in a cup on his desk and wrote laboriously on a note sheet; 50 W 33rd St. The ink was still wet and the hand writing, masculine.

He gave the note to Batman. “It’s a strip club” (Y/n) said “He goes there sometimes to blow off steam.”

(Y/n) unceremoniously tacked on, “You’ll like it there. They have big chested hard bodies that you can bury yourself in.”

Rather violently, Batman fisted his tuxedo in his hands. (Y/n) could hear his chair crackle underneath the weight. “You’re revolting. People are going to die.”

(Y/n) tried to animate his face in symphony. “Like that shit heel, Jason, did?”

That seemed to get him. Batman lunged his fist forward so hard and fast, (Y/n) felt his broad latex knuckles hit the back of his brain. His head dipped in a thunderbolt of pain with his broken nose and busted lip and a fury on his tongue,

“Fuck! You ass-“

(Y/n)’s frenzied sentence cut off jaggedly as Batman knuckled deep into his lapel once more and smashed their lips together in a ferocity that always seemed to always catch (Y/n) off guard.

Batman has always been restrained and aloof, a caution that comes with being vigilante. But now, from this close, (Y/n) could see the way Batman’s muscles worked, the flex of his shoulders - not out of shyness nor shame, but desire that only his skin could keep inside.

When they parted with hot and heavy breath, Batman, acutely missing (Y/n)’s cocaine tint tongue, said, “You owe it to me to find him.”

And, (Y/n), utterly dazed, licked his bloodied lip and said “You know how to keep a man wanting, bats.” then dipped his head in for another kiss.

The way Batman’s tongue lapped at the sliced skin of his bruised lip - (Y/n) knew he was a man possessed.

[mockingjaylad]

Mystery twins in Gotham AU…….

Or even just one of them then it’s the stans situation all over again (if it’s multi universal shenanigans and not just making gravity falls real in DCU) and either dipper or Mabel are desperate to find their way back to the other

Both Dipper and Mabel I feel could have really cool dynamics with the batfam

Thinking about how it could have happened is also really cool whether it’s from an outside source from Gotham or maybe some strange unexplainable portal in gravity falls of which both Mabel and dippers pov from gravity falls would be really interesting how they solve the mysteries and figure out how to bring the other back

I feel like both are definitely able to do it because they are awesome and I care them very much

Ofc with the help of other people in GF

It would be really cool to see how they adapt to the DC universe with how much insane shit they’ve seen but ig this could also depend on what period in time the transfer happens

Like if it’s after weirdmagedon then they’d probably be a lot better at adapting and surviving (they adapt very well normally anyways) But maybe if it was before most of the really dark creepy stuff that happens in the show it would be like a kid with way too many questions about their own world gets put into a world with even more strange stuff to think about and how it would effect them

BUT WHAT IF IT WAS BOTH OF THEM!!!! Then their grunkles and friends are like freaking out course the twins have gone missing to some other universe and all the drama

But Mabel and Dipper despite still trying to get home are just kind of having a great time feeding off eachothers energy keeping the vibes high

Like hey at least it’s not a world ending apocalypse where a demon is actively trying to hunt us down and kill us! (That they know of)

Dipper would fit in pretty well with all the paranoid Gothamites but Mabel would instantly get into so much trouble all the time and be immediately on the bars watch list

Dipper and Mabel acting so much like Steph and Tim in those baby vigilante fics where they go out and Tim takes pictures while Steph goes crazy beating up bad guys

Mabel with her own sweater vigilante costume covering her face and a GRAPPLING HOOK!!!!!!!

“So what are you, a twelve year old girl, doing in the streets of Gotham clearly no clue about any of the unspoken rules beating bad guys up”

“… GRAPPLING HOOK!!!!”

She launches the grappling hook at them like the puffy sticker experiment

Them randomly dropping lore about their world to the Bats

“This remind me of that time I was kidnapped by gnomes to become their gnome wife forever” out of nowhere while in a hostage or kidnapping situation and their all just like “HUH???? UR TWELVE????? GNOME WIFE????????”

“this reminds me of the mini golf course people”

Sorry chat I have the gravity falls brainrot

These dumb tweens really thought they did something with these disguises