#the batfamily meets the justice league
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Another idea for the JL meeting the BatFam:
You know how there are prompts/fics where they capture Red Hood and arrest him because they just know him as a crime lord and not Batman's son, until Bruce shows up and pretty much bails him out??
Take that but have the majority (if not all) his kids be villains he's taken in to help reform and live better lives. They don't fight crime (yet) but they like lurking about in the manor and in the cave.
The JL needs to meet somewhere due the Watchtower being closed for some major upgrades and repairs, and it's voted that the Batcave would be the next best place. Bruce isn't happy about it, but begrudgingly let's them hold the next few meetings there.
The first few went by smoothly, but then one day one of them, most likely Hal or Oliver, notices something in the corner of their eyes and they just see large, golden, eyes stare back at them. And they tell the others about it. They're about to get ready to fight, when Bruce just lets out the biggest sigh and says, "Dick, please, everything is fine."
He's not even looking in the direction of the eyes, so he can't see the heavy "I fucking doubt it" look the young man has on his face.
The JL eventually sits back down and resume the meeting, all while feeling an intense stare on them. If you ask, none of them jumped when the young man propped himself against Batman's chair. The meeting, thankfully, ends quickly.
And the next few meetings introduce a few new faces (another young man, this one with a white streak in his hair. He almost always had a loaded gun in his hands, if not blades he was cleaning. And then there was a boy, who looked a bit too much like the Joker, and was constantly pranking them. No one wants to talk about the time Dick showed up again, this time with a girl and younger boy and any silence was broken by birds chirping).
Once they're able to get back to the Watchtower, they demand answers, and wow is that a long story.
#justice league meets the batfamily#the batfamily meets the justice league#justice league#batfam#talon dick grayson#dick grayson#red hood#crime lord jason todd#joker junior#tim drake#damian wayne#bruce wayne#batman#personal HC of mine is that talons are selective mute#it's part of their training#so dick doesn't talk#it's different from cass but she's still the only one who understands the most#the bird chirping is dick's way of talking when actually talking is hard and the rest of the bats learned to communicate with him this way
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I've seen a lot of Batfam meets the Justice League fics where Batman has hidden his family. I'd really like a Batfam meets the Justice League fic where he doesn't try to hide his family no. The Batman who loves scaring people, popping out of shadows, disappearing into them, and overall just fucking with people, the head of the chaotic Batfam, he knowing that the other heros don't know a lot of what goes on in Gotham so he just pretends like they know. He tells them it's Oracle's system that runs watchtower and he make a bunch of vague references to the other bats knowing they are going to take it a different way. He doesn't try to hide his relationship with the other bats when his kids and their teams run into the Justice League. He just sits back and watches the chaos as the leaguers try to make their perception of The Batman fit with what they are seeing.
And his kids and their teams? Well they should have believed them when they said Batman was they're dad. It's not their fault they thought they were joking. Even Alfred is in on it making calls to watchtower and Titan's tower about being home in time for dinner and forgetting their lunches at home. Alfred is happy how this is bringing them together and that Bruce is making friends.
Meanwhile the Hero community is scared shitless about Batman's retired dad that doesn't have a no kill rule. They've never met him in person but the overall respect of the Batfam has towards Agent A as well as the fact he raised Batman makes them never want to meet him or for him to feel a need to come out of retirement.
***
"oh Batman isn't the head of the Batfamily"
"what?"
"Agent A is"
***
"who's scarier than Batman?", one of the leaguers asks rhetorically
Batfam member who pops up behind them from the shadows, "Agent A, he doesn't have a no kill rule"
"who's Agent A?"
"The man who raised Batman"
The leaguer who once referred to him as that old guy that answers the batcave phone: 😨
#fanfiction ideas#batfam#batfamily fic#Justice League meets the Batfamily#the batfamily meets the Justice League#scary Alfred Pennyworth#perhaps you rely on my master's vow against lethal force I subscribe to no such niceties#scared justice league#fanfiction prompts#batman fanfiction#messing with the justice league as a form of bonding#messing with the titans as a form of bonding#chaotic Batfamily#Batfamily dynamics#isolated Batfamily#no body knows what goes on in Gotham#hiding in plain sight#crack fic
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I have an obsession with Batfam meets the Justice League fics and headcanons in general, and my favorite situation is when the JL fully knows Nightwing, he's on the team, they all like him quite a bit, and he's so charming and open seeming that they all collectively forget that they don't know anything about him.
I want that, then on a mission, fighting a magic user of some sort, Nightwing gets zapped back to young Robin age. So everyone else on said mission is left confronted with 9 year old Dick Grayson in full Robin gear, who is fully ready to fight every single one of them, and they generally have no idea what's happening or who this child is, other than the fact that he's probably young Nightwing, except he won't answer to that name.
And Dick, extremely confused and suspicious because he doesn't know half of the people there, and the ones that he is aware of are wearing different costumes or are just straight up different people than they're supposed to be, proceeds to try and fight them, then actively try to run away.
Then they finally manage to wrangle him back to the Watchtower, trying to grapple with the implications that Nightwing has been a highly trained, costume vigilante since childhood, and managed to break a bone in Green Arrow's hand before they subdued him, and is still thrashing around and trying to bite various League members.
They call Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman in to see if they have any idea what to do with him, and when Robin sees Batman, he squirms out of Flash's grasp, runs to Batman, and climbs up his side until he's wrapped himself around his shoulders like he does it every day.
The Bat lets this happen, sighs in exasperation, then calls Zatanna to help.
The League is then left to piece together why tiny child Nightwing ran to Batman for safety, and why Batman seems a whole lot less confused than everyone else.
#batman#comics#dc comics#justice league#batfamily#nightwing#dick grayson#bruce wayne#justice league headcanon#batfamily meets the justice league#dick grayson robin#robin dc#robin dick grayson
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Love when the Justice League thinks Batman is a cryptid. This believe is only further enhanced by the face his sidekick, Robin, is clearly a shapeshifter, what with changing their height, hair style, skin tone, and even gender.
Batman clearly thinks that by having Robin look different every couple of years, it will show that they aren't cryptids like it would if Robin didn't age.
But the Justice League is too smart for that. They figured it out! But they are good friends (colleagues) and won't spill Batman's secret, but they will drop hints to him that they know, to show that they are smarter than he gives them credit for (they aren't.)
-
When the batkids learn that the league thinks this, they start periodically going to the Watchtower with Bruce, taking turns dressed up as Robin.
The League is surprised as Robin seems to prefer taking the form of a child, perhaps to have villains underestimate them? But they just assume Robin is trying out something new.
The batkids definitely tell eachother about what was said/happened as to further sell the act of Robin being a shapeshifter, because clearly it has to be the same person, Robin knows what happened, so it couldn't of been someone else dressed as Robin.
#Bruce just lets it happen because#1) it helps keep an air of mystery around him#if people think he's a cryptid and Robin's a shapeshifter they wont figure out his secret identity#and 2) his kids are getting along#sure they are bonding though mischief#but a win is a win#batman#dc#dc comics#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#batkids#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#dc robin#even one's who werent a Robin join in#ie Cass and Duke#the justice league#justice league#justice league meets the batfam#cryptid batfam#cryptid batman#misunderstandings#kat's library
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I have such a soft spot for the JL forming while the Batfam is alredy big and out there, like I mean Bruce being like 39 and Dick already 27 kind of vibes. Especially if the JL has no clue abt them, it's just so funny to me. Bc they know Batman has been doing it for a long time already and they've heard rumors of more heroes in Gotham, but theyve never been confirmed and Batman keeps them away and they respect him enough to listen. Then the JL enlist Nightwing, who is closer to the average age of the JL, who has already been protecting his city for nearing a decade. And he's professional competent and they don't think any of it when he and Batman work well together, because humans stick together they guess.
Only for Batman to randomly lick his thumb to get some food of Nightwing's face and Nightwing whining: "Daaaaad," all embarrassed, shocking the entire JL, which isn't at all help when Dick adds: "I'm too old for this, go clean Robin's face." And then they have another heartattack, because Batman sounds almost sad when he replies: "Soon you're all going to be too old for this." Which causes Nightwing to pat his back and say: "Don't worry, B. We're never going to be too old to get embarrassed by you." Which somehow cheers Batman (dark scary Batman) up. And that's how the JL learns that the two are related and B very much doesn't work alone.
#rrrambles#batman#nightwing#jl#jla#justice league#dc#dc comics#dcu#dc headcanon#batfam headcanons#batfam#batfamily#dick grayson#bruce wayne#good parent bruce wayne#jl headcanon#justice league headcanon#batfam meets jl#robin
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Batman has to constantly remind them he's not going down with the sinking ship when it's not his fault
Superman: Yeah, so we're turning ourselves into the government. Do you want to meet us there, or should we meet with you?
Batman: …
Wonder Woman: Batman, we're on a time crunch. Just give us your answer.
Batman (while driving, hesitating): First, I'm fine, thank you. How are you? Second, my son, who is in the car with me, is also fine… thankfully. Third, are you on crack?
Superman: I… We as a team voted that it's best if we turn ourselves into the government.
Batman (flatly): That's a decision you made. You guys have fun with it. Can I go now?
Wonder Woman: You’re part of the team! You have to turn yourself in!
Batman: Says who?
Wonder Woman: We decided as a team!
Batman: Yes, good for you. Why am I being dragged into this?
Wonder Woman and Superman: YOU ARE PART OF THIS TEAM!
Damian (in the background): Father, can we get McFlurrys later?
Batman (to Damian): Why do people eat those? They taste disgusting.
Damian: You have to get the one with the Oreos.
Superman: We’re still on the call!
Batman (annoyed): Right, not going in. Bye.
Wonder Woman: Don’t end the call! You have to hear us out.
Batman: I should just hang up, but I’m bored and need something entertaining to listen to. Proceed.
Flash (speaking first): Take one for the team, Bruce.
Batman: Okay, first, when I'm on a call with any of you, call me by my hero name. Commissioner Gordon can get away with that, but I’m not on that level with most of you. Second, I’m not on this team if you want me to do this ridiculousness. Third, seriously, are you on crack?
Green Arrow (in the background): Thank you for not saying heroin.
Damian (in the background): Father, why do they think you’re dumb?
Batman: Because they’re not very smart.
Green Arrow (expecting this): It’s amazing how badly this is going. I told you guys he’d say no, but nobody listens to me.
Batman: This is one of the rare times I agree with Arrow. I didn't sign up for a team where we all turn ourselves in for something I didn’t do.
Superman: It’s a team decision.
Batman: I don’t care.
Superman: But it’s for solidarity.
Batman: That I don’t care about.
Superman: Again, we’re a hero team. We’ve saved the world together; can’t you do this one little thing?
Green Lantern (Hal): And his response is…
Batman: Fighting villains, I enjoy. I wouldn’t be on a sports team, a firefighter team, or a doctor team with you if you're going to be this dense, and I sure as hell won't be on this team if you want me to do something this stupid. Is the brain cell you share gone for the day?
Superman: Okay, well… Kara is going with us.
Batman: And I've lost a little respect for her.
Supergirl: Hey! Wait, you had respect for me?
Batman: Did you contact any of my adult kids? Nightwing? Red Robin? I know Red Hood would just laugh before hanging up.
Superman: We haven't called them yet… but I bet they'd say yes!
Batman: No, they wouldn’t. I know that because they just texted my youngest son, who’s with me, and their messages say, “Not a chance in hell.” I didn’t even have to say anything. I raised them well.
Superman: Can’t you put aside your ego and just do this for us?
Batman: Who’s going to pick up my son from school? Go to my daughter's recital? Attend my other son’s group therapy session? Talk to my future fiancée about where I’ll be? Just curious, which one of you will handle that?
Batman waited for a few seconds, and none of the members responded.
Batman: Right. As stated, I'm not going, and if you call me again with this stupid request, I'm cutting the power to the building for a month. I will let that building decay to prove a point.
Damian: You tell 'em, Father!
Batman ended the video call without another word.
Wonder Woman: He’s getting calmer with his reactions.
Green Arrow: Yeah… Guys, maybe we don’t turn ourselves in this time. Maybe we… do something else? Anything else, because he has a point. I'm not sinking in the Titanic when there's a lifeboat.
Aquaman: Good Titanic metaphor.
Green Arrow: Thanks, man.
#batfamily#batman#batfamily shenanigans#batfamily headcanons#batfamily fanfiction#dick grayson#batfamily funny#batfamily adventures#batfamily fluff#batfamily comedy#script fic#mini fics#dc fanfiction#fan writing#batfamily mini fics#flash fiction#wayne family adventures#dc stands for disregard canon#no beta we die like jason todd#writer on ao3#justice league#bruce wayne#batfamily meets the justice league#based off that one episode from the show#ficlet#mini fic#justice league headcanon
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Can someone please recommend fics where Dick talks about Jason as his "Baby brother" and people always think he's a kid or something, but then they meet him and just blue screen, because this is a 6'0 dude, decked out in guns as though he's a Christmas tree and they're his ornaments, (bonus points if he threatens to shoot anyone making a move on Dick), and built like a fridge standing next to the superhero version of a flexible sunshine.
Please, I'm begging you, I need these fics for my 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭.
Also, on that note, if anyone has any fics where Bruce talks about all his kids as his "Babies" and then introduces them to the JL and pretty much the same thing happens, only Bruce adds the whole "I birthed them all" thing (whether it's as a joke or he's actually a cryptid, I don't care).
Please 🙏
#dick grayson#richard grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#bruce wayne#batman#batfam#batfamily#bat family#batsiblings#bat siblings#batkids#bat kids#batdad#dick grayson and jason todd#jason todd and dick grayson#cryptid batfam#the justice league#justice league#jla#jl#batfamily meets the justice league#dcu#dc#batfam fanfic#batfam fic#batfam fic rec#batfamily fanfiction#batfamily fic
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JL meets the Batfam AU
Thinking nightwing and the bat are together addition:
Okay so there are a few fics out there where the Justice League think that Nightwing and Batman are together. There are sum where they play into for kicks and giggles and some where once the bat fam find out they put stop to it.
Okay but what about one where once the JL finally confront them about it the bat fam just kinda sits there and stares at them with a mixture of shock and discuss. The JL continues to talk about their theory about the two being together until Nightwing whines “… Daaaaaaaad make them stop” with some amount of horror mixed into his voice
This gets the JL to finally stop and look at the two people and really look at them.
Cue the chaos and rapid fire apologies before an angry bat gives them a well deserved lecturer
#batfam#batman#red hood#dick grayson#jason todd#nightwing#tim drake#damian wayne#fanfiction idea#justice league#justice league being idiots#justice league meets the batfamily
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when talking about the batfamily meeting the justice league, specifically regarding jason todd and red hood reveals, why does no one acknowledge that batman was part of jli during the time of jaybin.
if anyone is from the justice league recognized jason todd, it would be guy gardner, scott free, dinah lance, booster, ted kord, j’onn, and max lord.
give me less hal jordan and barry allen recognizing jason and give me guy and booster. ofc clark and diana would also recognize him (bc the trinity and all that), but get the true line-up accurate in your fanfics
#jaybin: why are they so incompetent??#blue beetle: who let this twelve year old up here?#*billy batson awkwardly looking around*#justice league#batfamily meets the justice league#batfam meets the justice league#red hood meets the justice league#jason todd#jaybin#robin#red hood#dc robin#jli#jla#batman#bruce wayne#dinah lance#black canary#mr miracle#scott free#blue beetle#ted kord#booster gold#guy gardner#j’onn j’onzz#martian manhunter#max lord#justice league international#batfamily
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Spiderman meets the Justice League
You kknow those fics where spiderman ends up in Gotham, or the ones where the JL (Justice League) finds that Batman is a dad and ends up meeting the batfam?
Well, what about a fic where the JL meets Spiderman, but not in the way where he ends up in the DC universe (in one way or the other) in the middle of a JL meeting or the Watchtower, but like as a batkid
Let me explain, Gotham is still Bat territory, the JL dosen't really know what happens there if Bruce dosen't tell them; so they don't know about Peter arrival in Gotham and the fact he became a vigilante there, and they don't know that Bruce adopted him (or Dick or Jason did) and that he became part of the batfam.
So when they meet him is like at random, for example the JL needs help in some chemical thing or something and Batman propose to ask help to one of his kids, and the JL is like: "Tim? Wasn't he good with tech and logistic stuff like Victor? (Cyborg for those who don't know)"
And Batman confused: Not Tim, Peter
JL: Jason?! Wasn't he more interested in literature (because for those who don't know, Jason full name is "Jason Peter Todd")
And Batman is just confused, for then to realize that the JL never met his new son Peter Parker, aka Spiderman who comes from who knows where and that is a genius in chemestry, biology and engineering. So he calls him and the zeta-tube activates saying Spiderman code and from them comes out this chill guy (in spiderman suit because he just finished patrolling with Duke) with a smootie and greets them like is the most normal thing and the JL is just shocked because Bruce adopted another meta
#batfam fanfic#batfam au#batman#batfam#dc fanfic#dc#spiderman#spiderman in gotham#marvel crossover#dc crossover#Spiderman meets the justice league#Spiderman meets the JL#fanfic#spiderman fanfiction#spiderman fic#Au#Spiderman fic prompt#justice league fic#justice league#fic prompt#Fic#spiderman crossover#batman crossover#Justice league crossover#batfamily#Spiderman in gotham au
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Fuck it
JL Meets the BatFam scenarios:
I already mentioned the whole "JL thought the Robins were literal fucking birds" thing (kinda what caused this to happen)
Kinda a rewrite of Teen Titans, the League is there when Starfire escapes from her enslavers but they aren't able to talk with her (language barrier combined with a "healthy" dose of fear). She sees them all as her enemy and is ready to fight. The League is wondering how to get her to calm down and are considering knocking her out when this kid in a costume walks over and somehow gets her to calm dow- why did she kiss- WHY CAN SHE SPEAK ENGLISH NOW?! (I can see this as a series of short stories where they'll meet a different BatFam member as it goes on, starting obviously with Dick).
We gotta throw in a reverse!Robin au: Batman shows up late to a meeting, which upon arrival, he only says he was getting his son out of prison. And, well, okay. First off, why was his son in prison? And two, WHY WAS HIS SON IN PRISON?! The Batman. Has a son. Who was in prison. And he had to bail him out. The meeting diverges from it's original content because they all want to know what his son did. What did he do that got him arrested? The zeta tubes come to life and a stoic looking man (JL, thinking: who the hell is THAT?!) walks over with a little boy, whom he drops on Batman's lap. He says nothing and leaves. And Batman just answers the question with: He was born. It's short and straight to the point. He'll later tell the league the little boy was his son that he had to get out of prison. And that lead to the story of how he and his other children (THERE ARE MORE?!) saw the little boy lose his family and home all in one night. That stoic boy? His eldest and only biological son. He has two more sons, aside from his eldest and youngest, and a daughter, making for five kids in total. Six if he counted Batgirl/Spoiler (Steph).
The League gets infiltrated by Batman's birds. He has no idea when they snuck into the Watch Tower, but he's not about to tell the rest of the League. He can use this as a training exercise. See who catches on. If they catch on.
(fem!Dick Grayson) The League has heard about Bruce Wayne and his many (5) children. They've seen them and have rescued them many times. There's the eldest, Richelle "it's Dick not Dixie, Elle or Ellie" Grayson, the second oldest, Cassandra "I could murder you if I wanted to" Cain, the middle child, Jason "fuck you I literally died" Todd, the second youngest, Timothy "sleep is for the weak and the dead" Drake, and the youngest, Damian "if I wasn't being held back I would murder you" Wayne. No they're not exaggerating with the names. What they don't know is that all these kids have worked with them, until one of them calls Bruce "dad" (post Batman identity reveal).
Batman, that is a child. Why are you letting a child fight crime?! Come here sweetie, we'll take you somewhe- HE BIT ME?! (aka JL meets Dick Grayson during his early Robin days, when he's absolutely a feral menace and will actually bite you. They assume once a new Robin shows up, things will be different. It isn't.)
Leaguer, waving to Batman as they pass him: Batman. Batman. Batma- Leaguer, stops and stares at three Batmans: Wait- (JL meets the Batfam by them all showing up to the Watchtower dressed as Batman, Bruce pretends they're not there, but he was the one who okayed the idea. He won't admit it out loud, but honestly it is kinda funny.)
#justice league meets the batfamily#batfam#justice league#the batfamily meets the justice league#batman#bruce wayne#nightwing#dick grayson#female dick grayson#red hood#jason todd#red robin#tim drake#robin#damian wayne#orphan#black bat#batgirl#cassandra cain#stephanie brown
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I think Dick's friends (the titans) would be totally ok with him being "not too human, a little too ethereal", the justice league would be terrified tho
True!! I mean, Raven is literally a half demon (i think), Garth is a shape shifter, and so on. Dick would fit right in, and nobody would press him for explanations which is even better.
But yeah, the JL? Not a fan. Oh, they like Robin alright! But….
Batman, are you sure your child is… quite alright? I don’t think kids are meant to have that many teeth.
What do you mean Robin “is just like that”!? I saw him bite a man in the throat! What do you mean you’re proud!? You’re proud because the wound wasn’t lethal!?!?!?!!?
Batman, please come collect your child. He’s back inside the radioactive chamber again. Yes, the one that’s scheduled for decontamination. No, we don’t know how he got in there—- what do you mean leave him!? That radiation could kill ten men in three minutes flat! He’s been in there for an hour!! NO I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!!!!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE’S HAVING A TEMPER TANTRUM!?!?!?
Robin, please come dow— how did you even get up there????
Hey, I’m not the best with kids or anything, but are they supposed to have feathers? What— no! No, i swear, they were right there!!!
Batman, I think Robin ate my goldfish. … What do you mean “it kept complaining about his hairstyle”!?
#fae dick grayson#dick grayson#the other things from the woods#the ones with eyes closed#Bruce Wayne#Batman#batfamily#Justice league#meet the weird fae child#shenanigans#ghost talks
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Batfam meets the Justice League fic idea where it's actually just Oliver Queen in Star City attempting to hunt down Red Hood (who isn't even there doing crimes actually, he's just visiting Roy, but Ollie doesn't know this) except every time he tracks him down, he finds another costumed vigilante (Read: Batfam) attempting to get his help for something.
And like, Ollie recognizes them, of course. Because isn't that Nightwing? Nightwing who is actively on the Justice League? Why is he asking an infamous crime lord to come home for dinner?
And then, a week later, he's tracking down another Red Hood sighting and.... that's Red Robin. He's in charge of Young Justice, isn't he? And he just fought Red Hood in an alley and then stood up like nothing happened and bugged him for intelligence on a case he's working, and Red Hood gave it to him?
And it just keeps going down the list until Ollie's at his wits end and partially convinced that a handful of vigilantes on various teams, who he can't for the life of him think of a way they might be connected, might actually be corrupt and working with the mob, then he (begrudgingly) follows reports of another sighting of Red Hood and... that's Batman, arguing with Red Hood but not actually fighting or detaining him, so Ollie sneaks closer and listens to the conversation and... it's the dinner thing again. Family dinner, he hears a few seconds later, and someone named Agent A would really like it if Hood came home for a few hours.
Ollie leaves that situation somehow far more confused than when he started, and he was already extremely confused.
Roy is fully aware that this is happening the entire time and is having the time of his life.
#batman#comics#dc comics#batfamily#justice league#justice league headcanon#batfamily meets the justice league#oliver queen#green arrow#red hood#jason todd#bruce wayne#dick grayson#nightwing#tim drake#red robin#batfamily headcanons#batfam#batfam shenanigans
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me choosing everyday to read the most fluffy batfam crack fics or the angstiest stuff possible
#the whiplash from reading wfa bruce and then going to utrh bruce#why do I do this to myself#jason todd#I have literally gone from the “batfamily meets the justice league” tag to “suicidal jason todd”#im sure this is a universal experience#ao3#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#red hood#utrh#wfa
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Ok but the Justice League kidnapping Duke, bc he seems like a good kid and they don't want him to get banished by Batman for being a meta, so they can train him and set him loose in another city. Meanwhile, Duke is unsure if he should tell them that Batman is cool with him being in the city and also his foster dad, but also not wanting to be rude or make the League feel bad (bc they're the League and he's a fanboy), so he just lets them. Until an angry Batman comes to collect his kid and the Justice League gets whiplash bc what do you mean this guy is allowed to be meta in your city? And B is just like: my child priviledges f u.
(Duke totally gets the number one spot on the coolest kidnapping leaderboard).
#rrrambles#dc#dc comics#dcu#the justice league#justice league#jl#jla#batfam headcanons#batman#batfam#batfamily#duke thomas#signal#signal dc#batfam meets jl#bruce wayne#dc headcanon#jl headcanon#good parent bruce wayne#duke thomas signal
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Batman: I struggle with falling in love with women.
Green Arrow (curious): Are you gay or something?
Batman (serious): No. I tested that.
A heavy silence fell over the JLA meeting room as everyone processed his words, wondering if he was joking.
J'onn (stirring his hot chocolate): He’s not even remotely kidding.
Hawkman groaned realizing he lost the bet.
Hawkgirl (taking a hundred bucks from Hawkman): I knew it! Who was it?
Vixen: Was it Superman? Aquaman? Green Arrow? The Flash? Wait… Was it—
Flash (defensive): Stop guessing! He hasn’t been with any of us!
Batman: I wouldn't lower my standards like that and Aquaman is a friend.
Aquaman perked hearing this while eating his sandwich. Superman rolled his eyes jealous.
J'onn: Some of you have thought about it, though.
Green Arrow blushed, looking down at his hands.
Green Arrow: It’s not my fault he’s attractive without the cowl on.
Hawkgirl: Batman— What? Never mind. Back to you! Who was it? Dish. You can trust us.
Batman: Nah.
Hawkgirl: What do you mean, "nah"?
Batman: It means I’m leaving you all guessing how I tested this. And trust me, that makes it funnier for me. Plus, J'onn won't disclose it either!
J'onn: He's right, we have a deal.
Hawkgirl: Dude!
J'onn: He promised to show me those Star Wars films this weekend, and I’m not missing the Christmas special!
#flash fiction#batfamily fluff#microfiction#batfamily comedy#script fic#batfamily funny#dc fanfiction#dc stands for disregard canon#no beta we die like jason todd#batfamily adventures#batfamily#batfamily headcanons#batfamily fanfiction#mini fics#batfamily mini fics#batfamily shenanigans#batfamily microfiction#batman#writer on ao3#bruce wayne#batfamily meets the justice league#justice league#mini fic#fan writing#batfamily incorrect quotes#justice league incorrect quotes#justice league headcanon#i just don't doubt that bruce tried men on men stuff and was like 'yeah this is not for me but at least I tried it'#bruce seems comfortable enough in his sexuality to admit this lol
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