#tbh I have so much hate for myself

[heartshattering]

I hope I can enjoy dressing up again instead of clothing turning into a new form of anxiety for me.

I don't fit into XS sized clothes anymore and I have to keep telling myself that that's okay.

I might hate how I look now (a lot tbh...) but I have to believe this is better overall for my health and that I don't want to go back to how I was before.

IT'S. OKAY.

[teaboot]

Me: I appreciate that you keep bringing me tupperware leftovers but you really really shouldn't, you're going to lose a lot of containers

My brother, handing me the 10 thousandth container of leftovers: Oh yeah I forgot to ask when are you bringing those back

Me: You don't want them back.

My brother: What did you do

Me: Better question: what did I NOT do

Him: ...

Me:

Him: Oh my god

Me: Yeah

Him: You haven't been WASHING THEM?

Me: Bruh I'll be honest I haven't even been eating most of them

Him: Oh my god

Him: I have been bringing you lunch since-

Me: Halloween

Him: OH MY GOD

Me: Yeah

Him: It's been- we JUST bought those containers

Me: I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU TO STOP

Him: WHAT THE HELL

Me: I HAVE TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES TO STOP

Him: IF I DONT FEED YOU, YOU DONT EAT

Me: I AM AN ADULT I PACK FOOD

Him: WHAT FOOD

Me: I DONT KNOW, FUCKING. SPAGHETTI

Him: IN WHAT? IN WHAT? YOU DONT WASH YOUR FUCKING TUPPERWARE

Me: I DON'T *BUY* TUPPERWARE CAUSE I KNOW I WONT WASH IT

Him: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU CARRY THE SPAGHETTI IN

Me: Bags

Him: What

Me: Ziplock fucking bags

Him: YOU'RE EATING SPAGETTI OUT OF BAGS

Me: IT'S LESS WASTEFUL

Him: HOW is it less wasteful? HOW?? You're throwing out a plastic bag every single day!

Me: It's better than throwing out tupperware!

Him: TUPPERWARE IS REUSABLE

Me: NOT IF YOU DONT WASH IT

Him: WHY THE FUCK NOT

Me: I DONT DO DISHES

Him: THE FUCK YOU MEAN YOU DONT DO DISHES.

Me: I hate doing dishes. You KNOW I hate doing dishes. I have ALWAYS HATED DOING DISHES you KNOW this

Him: WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN EATING OFF OF

Me: PLASTIC BAGS

Him:

Him: You're a fucking trash monster

Me: You wore the same pair of Shrek pants every day for two years

Him: When will you let that go

Me: I will never let it go

Me:

Me: ...thank you for the lasagna

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

[coolsvilleprincess]

Be goth, solve crime.

Birthing this Scooby Doo specific blog with fanart for Be Cool because I needed to draw their goth fits, they were simply too much of a vibe to not tbh

[napping-sapphic]

Send me every little selfie you take so that i can look at them whenever i miss you

[peculiarbeauty]

hi guys ,

so i wanna be completely honest for a sec that i've been feeling super super weird being here and on my other blogs lately. i don't feel like i've had the same kind of drive. i've been trying to get through it and write and have a kickass time. i wanna be able to put myself into other hobbies though rn if that makes sense ?? and sometimes i can feel really overwhelmed like i have to look at follower numbers and i have to be present and i have to write or people won't wanna talk to me or be my friend anymore. and ??? i don't like that. i like to write when i want to and treat this as a hobby. i actually want to get into maybe painting and outdoor activities through a trainer maybe. go hiking more w/ my husband and stuff. there's a lot of things ?? i wanna do. and sometimes i feel this place takes up too much of my head , my heart , and just my time overall. and the worst part about it is , i can also feel REALLY depressed bc i will beat myself up for not being present. i'm such a people pleaser tbh. i try so hard to please others that i will stretch myself out far too much. i feel like everything might collapse if i'm not here. i don't like feeling like that. so i need a hiatus !!! i need some time to myself. to pursue other activities. to enjoy talking to my friends who aren't on tumblr too much if i'm honest.

i love all of you , you are so so cool . but i just cannot function rn the way i want to function. i don't even want to make these big ass promises bc i'm the type who will say things and then be writing two seconds later (but slap me if i do that pls. i need some peace of mind and being online is hard to get away from when you enjoy doing it) like , this place should not BE that serious. i have a job and actually I HAVE A JOB I AM HOPING TO GET THAT IS A HUUUUGE PROMOTION from the job i have now. so that's great yk ??? life is going on. i'm happy with my life. i just need to make decisions on what makes me happy and this just isn't right now.

[rileys-battlecats]

was trying to figure out why I feel so Wrong rn and I think it's because I didn't follow my usual daily routine like At All and now my brain is freaking out. woke up at a vastly different time, had entirely different tasks throughout the day, took a nap at a weird time (to make up for the fact I had about 3 hours of sleep last night), zero human contact for the past 15 hours, and ate different food from usual (various leftovers from social events/thanksgiving, instead of cooking for myself like normal). and before I really realized that these were all things that were Bad For My Brain I was just wandering around my house like "why do I feel like garbage?? I've literally been outside so much today my brain should be happy"

ANYWAY here's to me not remembering I have issues with unstructured living because my days have been so similar for the past 4ish years that I straight up Forgot that things being too different too fast makes me crazy ✌️

[cindergarten]

what are your kg ships? can be ships you absolutely love or also ships you think are cute.

I absolutely love 🩷Cindix💙 x100000

it grew on me and now it's like my biggest ship! 🫶 But it's also the only "popular" ship I have cuz I like lots of lesser known ships like:

💚Emindy🩷 and 💜Austix💙

( those two coexist in my mind. If I'm not shipping Cindy with Felix, I'm most likely shipping her with Emmy. Same goes for the boys. Listen, you just gotta see the vision )

Now for some that I like but I'm not as crazy about as the ones above: Perla, Bindy, Felonty, oooh and I really like Austemmy!! and a bunch of others. And I mean a BUNCH.

But yeah I'm veeery open minded when it comes to ships, the joy of being a multishipper ^^

[suzu-kun22]

What if someone wrote an FMA fic about Ed in 1923 era Germany Except he and Alfons are Jewish/percieved as Jewish

[lemonynuggets]

I might take a little social media break soon, I need to focus on some big events coming up on my life and I feel like it’d just be good for my health in general

I’ll still be on discord a lot tho (I love talking to my friends yayy) so if you wanna talk to me for any reason you can find me there!! Waos!!!!

So uhh bye in around a week I guess!!

[msnihilist]

It is worth noting that I get a lot of anon hate, mostly insults and vague threats, but that's just the thing — I get anon hate.

By which I mean, no one gets anons about me. There's no call out post circulating about me.

There's nothing to say that I'm not very open about. Everyone who follows me and is friends with me is very much aware of what I write about and what kind of dynamics that I enjoy in fiction.

Anons don't tell other people that I'm a horrible person, they tell me that I'm a horrible person.

Because they know that I'm not. They just want me to hate myself.

[bunnyboy-juice]

spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner

[venomgaia]

i still cant like. look at the stuff i made while in art school as anything other than (for the most part) miserablepointless and frankly uninspired garbage, which is a bummer bc most of it didn't sell during the BFA show either so i still have a lot of my senior show stuff haunting my residence. A lot of the projects i LIKED working on kinda suck in hindsight on a technical or overall execution level and all the ones I didnt that got completed tbh suck but in a different way (negative association bc of pressure ig?) but if one thing's certain

its that i shouldve been drawing man eating bugmen with their dicks out way sooner in pursuing my degree

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

tomorrow is my first day back to work and I'm a lil nervous

I haven't been able to get anything written for here bc I've been trying to get a couple other things written (updating my Bill Cipher redemption fic and starting a Gyutaro x reader x Daki because I make poor life choices)

but I'm on light duty for a month, basically just sitting at the register checking people out, unable to do any stocking or anything bc I'm not allowed to lift anything over 15 pounds so I can't lift totes, bend much, or reach much, so I'm allowed to bring something to do in between customers... maybe I'll get some writing done? I feel as if I'll be slacking off bc that's how my brain works

but you know what, I kill myself for that store normally, I don't work full time simply because I can't afford medical insurance if I did, but even working only part time I give my all while I'm there, I'm not someone who slacks off. so if I'm healthfully and approvedly permitted to slack off and take it easy for a month, I guess I'll take it (... plus, I mean, I'll still be working, just light duty, it's not like I'll show up and get paid to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, I'm still gonna be ringing out customers)

ANYWAY MY POINT IS-

get those last requests in! after I get home from work tomorrow, I'll be closing the askbox and won't open it back up till this batch is finished and I swear I mean that this time 😂

[catboyidia]

zayne would absolutely stay with rafayel on ebb day, and i think zayne would tirelessly care for rafayel and try to understand exactly what’s happening to him so he can try his hardest to find some way to make rafayel feel better, even despite rafayel protesting that he’s fine 🥺 i think zayne would learn everything he possibly can about lemurian biology for rafayel!

[writterings]

procastinating at work but here's my philosophy for today: it's okay to hate a behavior in someone else but also understand that this behavior does not make them a bad person. like i HATE when i'm venting or talking about a serious problem i have and then the person i'm talking to starts trying to relate by talking about a similar experience they've had. like absolutely hate it. make me feel like the focus is being taken off me and it genuinely is in some ways, regardless of your intent. yeah, i understand that's your way of trying to comfort me -- but that's not the way i need or want to be comforted, and that's what matters in a situation where i'm coming to you to be helped.

and that's okay! like. no one is in the wrong here unless i have explicitly asked you to support me in a different way and you're intentionally refusing, or if i lash out at you when i could just disengage. it just means you're not a person i should go to for help when talking about my problems. we can still be friends, you and i can probably support each other in different ways, but we're just incompatible in this regard. and that's like....okay. it's okay to be incompatible with people.