heartshattering

[heartshattering]

I'm just a copy anyway

There's no reason why someone who doesn't even have their own personality needs to exist :)

I'm nothing more than an imitation and a shitty one at that... one who just brings pain and suffering to others

I already know I won't be missed.

[heartshattering]

we are all born to die right? so is it wrong of me to speed up the process?

[heartshattering]

I hope C. knows this is her fault, too.

The least you could do as a friend is give your friend hope, not beat them down and tell them how their life is just going to be shit forever.

[heartshattering]

Is somebody gonna match my freak? (Double suicide)

[heartshattering]

I really feel like my heart is sinking, I can't breathe, my head feels like someone smashed the side of it with a hammer, I want to throw up, I'm screaming on the inside and I really feel like I have no reason to live at all. All that stuff about "but your family would be sad :(" doesn't matter to me. I WANT them to be sad and to live the rest of their lives knowing they could have helped me but they didn't. I don't have a best friend/fp to live for anymore either. Really I only have my dog and he'd be better off going to an owner who isn't mentally ill. I don't care about anything. There's nothing I look forward to doing in life anymore, I'm not motivated for anything. Really the only solution to all this is to just fucking die already and get it over with.

[heartshattering]

C. was right when she told me "things are never going to get better for you and your life is only going to keep getting worse and worse" :) she already knew there was no point in talking me out of suicide because it's the only solution for a person like me! She did me a favor by telling me the truth! IT'S NEVER GOING TO GET BETTER!!!!!!!! IT'S TRUE!!!!!!!! I don't know why the fuck I keep breathing when I'm just racking up the number of painful days, days where my parents make me want to die because all I do is get in their way, days where I'm in constant pain and can't sleep and don't even get help from meds anymore. Fucking hell life is just a cruel joke for me and I'm crying out for help in this house and my parents DO NOT CARE!!!!

[heartshattering]

it hurts so much

[heartshattering]

one of us needs to die

we can't coexist

my mom and I are like poison to each other, she makes me want to die so badly, and I know I can never be good enough for her, no matter how hard I try every day, no matter everything I've given up just to take care of her. I'm a shitty person who can't even help her own paralyzed mom correctly without fucking up and "not doing enough" and ruining everything.

I know deep down that it should be me who dies since all I do is bring pain to everyone

my only regret is not dying earlier back when people thought of me as this sweet cheerful girl full of potential instead of a loser adult with permanent mental and physical illnesses who only brings misery to others and should have died 10 years ago

it's just like the psychiatric center told me... I am a case that other people "can't handle", I'm beyond help, nothing in this fucking planet can fix me

I hate myself so so so SO fucking much, more than anyone else could hate me. I really just need to die. the longer I stick around, the more I keep fucking up

I'll probably fuck up at kms too but :) you never know until you try (again)!! <3

[heartshattering]

There is no getting better for me and I don't know why I'm keeping this pain going

[heartshattering]

I genuinely need to die

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trying very hard not to od rn

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another day of my mom making me want to kms 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

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⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚

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Guys 2014 is in two months

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don't people get tired of saying nonsense like "you can tell that person has a mental illness by looking at their eyes" ???

like do people like this actually hear themselves or

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some design ig