#study guide controversy

[probablyasocialecologist]

A comprehensive new report commissioned by the Utah Department of Health and Human Services provides one of the most detailed and exhaustive assessments to date on the medical safety, effectiveness, and long-term outcomes of gender-affirming care for transgender and nonbinary youth. And despite recent political rhetoric suggesting otherwise, the findings are clear: gender-affirming medical treatment, when guided by evidence-based protocols, helps transgender adolescents thrive. The report “Gender-Affirming Medical Treatments for Pediatric Patients with Gender Dysphoria” was produced by the University of Utah’s College of Pharmacy Drug Regimen Review Center and submitted to the state in August 2024. It arrives in the wake of Utah’s controversial Senate Bill 16, which placed a moratorium on gender-affirming medical care for minors and tasked health officials with conducting a review to determine whether the ban should remain in place. Rather than validating the restrictions, the 900-page report systematically debunks the narrative that these treatments are experimental or dangerous. Instead, it affirms what many healthcare professionals, families, and transgender individuals already know from lived experience: that access to gender-affirming hormone therapy and puberty blockers reduces psychological distress, improves quality of life, and is supported by decades of research. The Utah report is among the most thorough reviews conducted by a state agency. It draws on more than 270 clinical studies from the U.S., Canada, the Netherlands, Australia, and Europe, spanning observational studies, randomized controlled trials, and long-term descriptive research. These studies examined the mental and physical health outcomes of transgender youth who underwent gender-affirming medical care, including puberty blockers (GnRH analogs), cross-sex hormones (testosterone or estrogen), and related medications. Key findings include: Significant mental health improvement in adolescents undergoing gender-affirming care, including reductions in depression, anxiety, suicidality, and eating disorders. Improved quality of life and self-image reported by TGNB youth after starting hormone therapy. Low rates of regret or treatment discontinuation, especially when care is delivered through comprehensive, multidisciplinary teams. No serious long-term health risks found in monitored populations receiving hormone therapy, including studies with follow-ups as long as 40 years. The authors conclude that there is more evidence supporting gender-affirming care than there is for many high-risk new drugs approved for children in the U.S., including recent gene therapies.

23 May 2025

[solsticehymns]

jealousy, jealousy: drabble

remus lupin x f!reader / fluff / jealousy (duh)

summary: Remus isn’t one for grand displays of affection. But when he sees someone standing just a little too close to you, he doesn’t hesitate to step in—hand at your waist, voice steady, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. Maybe it is.

a/n: call this a controversial take but...i fully believe remus would be the most jealous of the marauders. james and sirius both think too highly of themselves to be worried about you cheating or anything but remus sees you talking to some guy and is genuinely shaking in his boots like i must intervene. that's the essential premise to this story lolol enjoyyyy xoxo, sunny ☀️🌻

wc: 573

“You know, I was thinking—maybe we should study together sometime,” the Ravenclaw suggests, his voice light yet calculated. He leans in slightly, his posture bordering on familiarity, the casual ease of his tone betraying an implicit suggestion. He stands just a fraction closer than necessary, his gaze holding yours expectantly, as if waiting for you to agree.

You offer a deferential smile, shifting your stance ever so slightly in search of an unobtrusive exit. “Oh—well, I usually study with Lily,” you reply, a mild attempt to redirect the conversation. You tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, hoping he’ll take the hint.

He doesn’t. “That’s alright, I’m sure we could—”

A firm yet familiar weight settles against your waist, grounding before you even fully register it.

“Hey,” Remus’s voice is smooth, measured. He steps beside you, his presence immediately altering the dynamic. He acknowledges the Ravenclaw with a nod—polite, yet unmistakably final—before shifting his full attention to you. “You ready to go?”

His hand at your waist isn’t forceful, but it’s deliberate. A quiet assertion. His touch lingers, unobtrusive yet undeniable. A slow warmth spreads in its wake, an unspoken claim that settles between you like something long-established. The warmth of his palm seeps through the fabric of your shirt, and your breath catches for just a second before you school your expression into something neutral.

“Oh—uh, yeah,” you respond, glancing at the Ravenclaw, who hesitates for a fraction of a second before rubbing the back of his neck. The shift in atmosphere is palpable, even if you hadn’t noticed it forming. His confidence, so easy and assured before, wanes pitifully as he glances between you and Remus.

“Right,” he says, his gaze flickering between you and Remus before he steps back. “See you in class.”

Remus doesn’t respond, simply steering you away, his hand remaining steadfast at your side. His thumb traces a small, idle circle against your hipbone, a barely-there movement you might not have noticed if you weren’t already hyperaware of his touch.

The two of you walk in silence for a few moments, footsteps echoing down the corridor. You can still feel the weight of his hand, the certainty of it, and it sends a quiet thrill through you. Then, unable to resist, you tilt your head up at him, a teasing grin forming at the corner of your lips.

“Remus Lupin,” you drawl, dragging out his name with practiced composure. “Were you jealous?”

His fingers flex slightly against your waist before he exhales, shaking his head. “No.”

You hum, unconvinced. “Really? Because it kind of seemed like—”

“I just,” he interrupts, his gaze flickering toward you, “thought he was standing a little too close to you, is all.”

Your grin widens. “So, you were jealous.”

He exhales again, resigned but not truly irritated. “You’re insufferable.”

“And yet, here you are,” you muse, leaning into him just slightly. “Still holding onto me.”

“I wouldn’t say holding,” he murmurs, though his fingers remain exactly where they are. “Just… guiding.”

“Oh? That’s what we’re calling it?” You let your own fingers brush lightly over his wrist, a feather-light touch that you feel him react to, even if he doesn’t acknowledge it aloud.

Remus mutters something unintelligible under his breath, but his hand never strays from your waist the entire walk down the corridor, his hold firm and steady as if he has no intention of letting go anytime soon.

☀️🌻 masterlist

[smiteswrites]

aghhh robby w a controversially YOUNG gf, like fucking 20 or something, who is taking premed a&p exams and she’s using him as her anatomy study guide n then he has to guide her through her first time w him dbdjshcsj

Nonny I wanted to be all smart and cool and learn anatomy and write a whole fic but I never took a&p and truthfully I can barely get myself to study for my PhD studies BUT I do have thoughts 

I am definitely picturing reader in her first year of medical school, deep in course work. Age could range depending on your path through high school and undergrad. Maybe you’ve never had sex before, maybe you’re just fairly inexperienced, always having focused on your studies. I can so see him helping you study anatomy or the like but he’s got you naked under him, absolutely worshiping your body. Leaving kisses and bite marks staring from your jaw, traveling down your sensitive neck to your tits, and lower. The catch is, every area he loves on he's quizzing you about. And you’re just so overwhelmed, the sensations are all so much, especially once he gets a hand between your legs. But if you don’t answer he pulls away and just looks at you expectantly. So there you are, stuttering out the names of different muscle groups, or the parts of the throat (girl I really don’t know), and he’s just littering your skin in hickeys, grinning when your answer is interrupted with a moan or squeal. Maybe he throws some edging in there too, getting you right on the edge before asking you something and then pulling his hand away when you inevitably answer wrong. Once he’s satisfied and you’re dripping, like making a wet spot on the sheets, he rewards you by pounding you into the mattress and making sure you come so hard all you can do is shake and cry and rake your nails down his back (: 

[quarterlifekitty]

Genius genius genius idea for the university thing omg

Who would teach what because I'm so conflicted.

At first I thought Johnny would teach chemistry (I'm a sucker for fics that show how smart he can be) but then again art teacher Jonny giving reader drawings of them is just so ugh</3

Simon teaching history?? Maybe?? I just have a feeling he gets super into ancient Greece and Roman war tactics. Presents old artifacts to reader like a cat catching a mouse and reader being like "did you take this from the archives without permission???"

I can feel in my bones that Price would be a philosophy teacher. He's an older man! He's experienced a lot of things in his life and it's made him very introspective. And seeing such an interesting bird like reader makes him want to have deep and meaningful conversations!

Gaz as a physics professor possibly? (helicopter joke) but he has such a passion for the topic and the way he talks about it (despite how God awful that subject is) sort of woos reader in a way, he's just so charismatic! Maybe reader struggles, or maybe they don't, either way you bet their ass is pouncing on the opportunity to get private tutoring from him the second he offers it.

Anywho I hope you have a good day!! Mwah!!

MY DAY IS GOOD NOW

I had some thoughts about this man but I do love your takes!!

I think Johnny would be painting/art history/ceramics because those concentrations are artistic and make excellent use of chemistry! Maybe he used to be a restoration specialist, he's an expert in the chemical compounds that make up varnishes and glazes used in antiquity. And yeah. When you're at the pottery wheel he can sit behind you and guide your hands like in the movie Ghost. What about it.

Controversial opinion. Ghost as a fibers/fashion professor. While I think Gaz is conventionally the best dressed, Gaz dresses safe. Simon does make his own masks-- I think if he had the time and resources, he could get really into making his own clothing. And during your meetings he has you act his dress form, because he thinks a live model is always better, and it gives him a reason to touch and squeeze you.

I thought of Gaz as a sociology/social sciences professor. I think he's got a lot of empathy and is interested in the study of relationships. And if that gets him the chance to act out certain scenarios for the purposes of demonstration, all the better. If we're going full arts I could see him in theater studies as well.

I Initially thought of Price as the history teacher. I think he's got the british disease of being obsessed with foreign antiquity. And he's always going on about the rituals and practices of ancient civilizations... Did you know noble Roman couples would sleep in a special bed just for their wedding night? And then it would be displayed in the house as a symbol. He just thinks that's so neat. Aztec people sometimes used cacao as a very special, sacred courting gift. But yeah, him always coming to office hours meetings with a hot chocolate for you could mean nothing.... But i do LOVE the idea of him as the Philosophy teacher always getting lost on tangents... And he just wants your opinions on everything. The way he stares so intently as you speak. Such an interesting little bird, with such a fresh perspective.

[charliegyrth]

Halloween Before and After

October 31, 2023

I met Mario at a Halloween house party near campus. He was Tarzan and I was a pirate. Match made in heaven.

I saw him through the crowded room. Shirtless. Bronze muscles bulging. He smiled at me first, as if I was some hot stud. As if I could possibly compare to him. I smiled back but was too afraid to approach him. (On some level, I thought it was a Halloween trick. This guy was way out of my league.)

He walked toward me, smiling wide enough to show the adorable gap in his front teeth. “I like your eye patch,” he shouted through the thumping music. That was his opening line. Cheesy, but it worked on me.

“I like your loin cloth,” I shouted back.

“Mario!” he shouted.

“Jake!”

We could barely hear each other, so he grabbed me by the wrist and guided me into the quiet backyard. It was a cold night, but Mario didn’t seem to mind. I guess his muscles insulated him.

“So. Jake. How’s your Halloween so far?”

“Uneventful.” I didn’t want to tell him that I felt deeply uncomfortable at the party, that my oversized, too-flamboyant pirate costume made me feel self-conscious, that I had no idea why a hot guy like him was talking to a non-entity like me.

“Well, it’s a big night for me. A really big night.” He smiled as if he’d just made a secret joke. “I, um… know you from sociology class. Professor Keating. I’ve always wanted to introduce myself.”

“There’s like 200 people in Keating’s class,” I said. (Slight exaggeration.)

“Exactly. Two hundred people, and you’re the only one brave enough to stand up to that tyrant.”

“Oh. That.”

He must’ve been talking about last month, when Keating had made some snide comments about the body positivity movement. He was one of those professors who got off on saying purposely controversial stuff and then shooting down any students who stood up to him. A crusader against PC culture or whatever. You know, one of those professors.

I’d grimaced at a lot of the things he said, but I’d never had the balls to say anything until he started talking nonsense about how it was good to fat-shame. How “not all bodies are beautiful.” I personally wasn’t fat. (In fact, I was noticeably underweight, and I came from a family of short, thin people.) But for some reason, his words really upset me and I pushed back. He absolutely tore into me, like he tore into anybody who disagreed with him. It was humiliating.

“Do you regret standing up to him?”

“I probably will once our grades come in,” I joked. “But no. Screw that guy.”

Mario smiled. I’d just said what he wanted to hear. “Yeah. Screw that guy.”

We shared a silent moment together. His dark eyes reflected the light from the jack-o-lanterns behind me. God, I wanted to kiss him so much. And it wasn’t because he was ridiculously good-looking. It was because… I don’t know. Because he was pulling me toward him like a magnet. Giving off this raw energy. Warmth.

I could tell that, somehow, he was as interested in me as I was in him.

“What’s your major?” he asked, switching toward the more standard getting-to-know-you phase of the conversation.

I told him about how I was studying business and taking culinary classes on the side. I talked about my internship at Lascari’s, a high-end restaurant in Scottsdale.

And in turn, he told me about his literature classes. And his time on the wrestling team. And his family’s Mexican restaurant up in Lake Havasu.

The restaurant business was the big thing we had in common. But we had a bunch of other stuff in common, too. Swimming. A passion for horror movies. Very similar political beliefs. After talking for over an hour, I felt deeply comfortable with him.

And deeply attracted, of course.

“So why is tonight such a big night for you?” I assumed he was going to talk about his deep love for Halloween. (Which… I get it. I loved Halloween, too. Despite the awkward parties.)

But then he got weirdly serious. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Tonight’s my last night in this body.”

“What?” I thought I heard him wrong.

“Let’s sit down.” He led me toward a gazebo decorated in cobwebs and plastic spiders. It was much darker inside. We sat together. “How would you describe my body, Jake?”

“Is this a trick question?”

“No.”

“Um, muscular. Tan. Very attractive. Slightly hairy. Hot?”

“Agreed,” he answered. “Not to sound conceited, but yeah. Most people think I’m hot. And I show it off. Hence the Tarzan costume. But… it’s not really the body that I want. I’m going to change it, starting tomorrow.”

“What do you mean?”

Instead of answering my question, he took my hand and placed it on his beefy pec. I could feel his heart beat underneath. Then he led my hand toward his stomach, where he let my fingers trace the deep lines between his abs. He let go of my hand and I pulled away, though I really wanted to keep touching.

I felt myself getting hard, but I still didn’t understand what he was trying to say.

Finally, he got to the point: “I’m going to cover all this in fat, Jake. Starting tomorrow, I’m going to stop exercising and spend every afternoon eating until I pass out. I’ve done research into fitness, nutrition, pharmaceuticals. I have a detailed plan to gain as much fat as I can, as fast as I can. My goal is to become morbidly obese. It’s what I’ve always wanted. So tonight, I’m celebrating the end of my old life.”

I didn’t say anything for a long time. I knew he wasn’t joking. And I knew from his anxious smile that, despite how matter-of-fact he sounded, he was nervous to tell me all of this. I had to be careful with how I responded.

Deep down, his confession horrified me. He had a body that anyone would kill for (a body that I would kill to be with), and he wanted to destroy it. Not only was that unhealthy, but it was… a shame. I knew that gainers existed, and I’m the last person to ever kink-shame someone, but my God. Choosing to be morbidly obese, that was disgusting. This guy was nuts.

But he’d chosen me to confide in because of how I stood up for body positivity, so I couldn’t say anything negative. I couldn’t argue with how he wanted to live his life.

And more importantly, I knew that if I played my cards right, he’d take me back to his place and f*ck my brains out. This was my one chance to be with an absolute muscle god. All I had to do was say the right thing. Tomorrow, I’d wish him the best and leave him to his own weird kink, but tonight, while he was still perfect, I’d ignore his craziness and have a good time.

“It sounds like you’re very determined,” I finally said. “I know it won’t be long until you get the body you were meant to have.”

He kissed me with such hungry passion that I knew I’d told him exactly what he wanted to hear.

***

October 31, 2025

“Jake! I need help tying up my loin cloth!”

“One second, babe,” I called from the kitchen. “I’m still mixing your shakes.”

After pouring the thick liquid (a combination of condensed milk, butter, ice cream, and weight gain powder) into a thermos, I rushed back into the living room.

Mario stood in the center of the room, completely naked. He’d been getting his Tarzan costume ready for the last twenty minutes, and yet he didn’t have a single bit of clothing on. God, he depended on me for everything.

I glanced around the room. “Okay. Where’s the loin cloth?”

He looked confused. “What do you mean? I’m wearing it.”

I immediately burst out laughing. I walked toward my fiancée, hoisted up his belly, and saw the loin cloth already wrapped around his waist. His fat pad bulged out of it obscenely, the fabric stretched so tight that I could even see the tiny bulge of what was his once-massive cock. He’d outgrown the loincloth a hundred pounds ago, but it didn’t matter, because it wasn’t even visible under his hanging stomach fat.

“Real talk,” I said. “You look f*cking amazing, but there is no way you can go to the party at our restaurant dressed like that. People will just think you’re naked.”

“But I’m not,” he said. “This is the costume I always wear.”

I let go of his belly and it flopped back into place. “Did you see yourself in the mirror?”

“Yeah,” he said mischievously. “I know I’ll get arrested if I wear this in public. But…”

“You just wanted to see my reaction, huh?”

I kissed him on his chubby cheek, pressing against his wobbling thigh so he could feel how the sight of him had immediately sprung me to attention. I was bulging out of my board shorts. (I chose a surfer costume this year.) “Well, you got a reaction out of me.”

I really wanted to take him into the bedroom, but then we’d miss the party. This was Halloween, our favorite holiday, and we couldn’t waste it by staying at home. Besides, we had to make an appearance at our restaurant. People were expecting us.

I circled around to his back, where the loin cloth had turned into a barely noticeable thong between his globular cheeks. I pulled it loose, letting the fabric fall to the floor.

“Okay, the Tarzan costume’s out. You can wear a bedsheet and be Fat Caesar? How about that?”

He agreed. We really didn’t have any other choice. I handed him a shake to keep him occupied and went into the bedroom to strip our bed. The sheet was purple, but it would have to do. I grabbed a pair of sweatpants (to prevent any wardrobe malfunctions) plus a couple safety pins. I also grabbed the framed photo on our dresser. Then I returned to the living room.

By then, Mario was back on the couch. I guess he’d been standing too long. He looked at everything I had in my hands. “What’s with the picture? Is that part of the costume, too?”

I sat next to him and handed him the photo. It had been on our dresser for two years now, so of course he recognized it. But you know how it is. The longer you have a decoration, the less you notice it.

It was a photo that we’d taken on the night we first met. We were posed in front of the party house, minutes away from going back to his place. Our mutual friend Sara saw us together and insisted that she record the moment. (I tried to tell her no. At the time, I assumed that Mario was going to be a one-night stand, not the love of my life. Thank God she didn’t listen to me.)

We had our arms around each other, both smiling.

I was practically swimming in my loose pirate costume. God, I was so boney back then, before Mario let me use his home gym and taught me all the exercises that he used to do.

And Mario, of course, was Tarzan. Before he grew a muffin top. Before his pecs melted into moobs. Before his chiseled jawline sprouted a second chin.

“We looked so different back then,” Mario said, nostalgically but not sadly. “That was, what? Two hundred pounds ago?”

“A bit more,” I said, patting him on the belly. “Sorry you can’t be Tarzan again this year.”

We both had fond memories of last Halloween, when he’d recreated the look. His gut was much firmer back then, so he wore the loin cloth just fine. Tarzan with a beer belly. He got a lot of comments.

“Do you remember what you said to me that night?” Mario asked.

“I remember saying a lot of things.”

“After I told you that I wanted to get fat. I was so nervous to hear your reaction. But you said, ‘I know it won’t be long until you get the body you were meant to have.’ Those were the exact words I needed to hear. Proof that you believed in me. And that you wanted this as much as I did.”

I didn’t then, but I do now. At the time, his confession had seriously freaked me out. I thought we’d have a one-night thing and I’d exit his life forever. But it had been such a good night, and then the next morning, when he started overeating, I was surprised by how turned on I was. And when he asked me to feed him… And when his body started to soften… And when I had to help him with simple tasks… And when we incorporated food in the bedroom… And when his moobs came in… And when he demanded belly rubs... And when… And when… And when…

With every step of his gaining journey, I grew closer and closer to my big, beautiful man. And now, two years later, I can’t understand how I could’ve ever been disgusted by the idea of weight gain. He’d built a perfect body for himself, and I was so lucky to be along for the ride.

Mario placed the picture on the coffee table and finished the rest of his shake. He burped a little because he knew I found that cute.

“Okay,” I said. “We’re done with the memory lane stuff. Stand up and I’ll put on your costume.”

I slid the sweatpants up his thick, dimpled legs. He spread his arms wide, letting his upper arm fat dangle beautifully, and I wrapped him in our sheet.

“Happy Halloween, babe,” he said.

“Happy Halloween.”

The End!

You can find all my stories here.

This story was also included in my anthology ebook Fatter for the Holidays.

[movingthisblogcelestialtarot11]

What’s your thoughts on 8th house stellium?

Specifically containing Mercury, Venus, Neptune and Uranus.

Thank you!

8h stellium—

—Loves hard and deep. Vulnerable with the right person. Access to them is a privilege, their energy and words travel so far and intimately. Anyone who comes into contact with these natives became changed. All their wounds and insecurities are aired out for transformation.

—Intelligent emotionally. Due to their harsh upbringing, these natives are able to read emotions and body language easily. They know when someone is lying. Source? Intuition.

—They may have struggled to believe and love themselves wholeheartedly, but once they do, the world falls in love with these natives. It’s as if giving to themselves endlessly creates more and more opportunities.

—Mercury sitting there denotes an incredible ability to analyze and interpret emotions into logical understanding. Prefers to dissect peoples behavior, emotions, and thoughts. Gets a kick out of analyzing someone to the bone, yet sometimes their brain overthinks. A spiral, never ending. Constantly looking inward to shape their outer world.

—Dabbles in art of some kind to release their pain. Or to soothe themselves. Poetry, drawing/painting, music, anything that gets them going in their fantasies. Music is their passion, and allows them to travel into different dimensions on the daily.

—Goal is to focus on the self and developing the identity outside of ego and trauma. Might pick up psychology studies, philosophy, and/or spiritual practices to help understand the world and their position in it.

—Guides others with their knowledge and experiences. Has such deep profound experiences, some people wonder how they’re still here. Truly someone worth respecting and acknowledging.

—Struggles with the public eye. Too much controversy, not enough truth. Too much attention, yet they want to be loved and seen. They just want the right people to be around them, not the people who hurt them.

—Can serve as a mirror for other peoples pain. Shows others their mistakes which can ignite friction in connections. But only those who can heal and realize it’s an opportunity, not a loss, will stick with these 8h natives.

—The type to wear fancy robes in their room at 3am and listen to Clair De Lune, fantasizing their dream life and creating with the universe. Knows the universe and them are bonded spiritually no matter the distance and harbors such a gentle energy within.

—But also understands it took violence to be this gentle.

[polyamzeal]

Polywise Review

When I first learned of non-monogamous, I seeked out as many resources as possible to learn if I really was it. Some of the most important resources were a few books. The communities I found made it seemed like you were not even allowed to have a license to be polyamorous unless you first read certain books. At that time, the holy bible of polyamory was More Than Two and before it was The Ethical Sluts. These were the books everybody recommended as a must-read if anybody wanted to learn more about polyamory, no matter what aspect of polyamory they wanted to learn more about. These books were hyped up like they would cover everything. Those books have fallen out of favor now a days and are hardly ever recommended and when they are people are quick to jump in to talk about their controversies as a reason why nobody should read them for them anything. So a new book had come along to become the new holy bible of polyamory. That book was Polysecure by Jessica Fern. How do I feel about Polysecure? I think it is a good book that is over-rated and over-recommended. Unlike the previous bibles, I do not see Polysecure as a polyamory 101 book. It does not get into the very basics of polyamory at all. It is much more of a polyamory 102 book, a book to read once you are ready dig deeper and study the more advanced topics. I think it is great we have 102 books! I am glad that every polyamory book out there is not just an introduction to polyamory. I often mention that "Love's Not Colorblind" by Kevin Patterson is a fantastic polyamory 102 book! Polysecure feels more focused on attachment theory than polyamory honestly to me. It is really interesting stuff to read but I never really felt like it applied much to my relationship, I rarely felt insecure in my relationships. I had other problems that needed working on in different ways.

So all that to say that Jessica Fern had a second book come out. And despite having some issues with the community worshipping the first book, I was ready to give the author another chance. It sounded like this book was going to be more of what the community makes Polysecure out to be. And yeah, I am happy to say it is accurate. Now I still don't think this is quite a polyamory 101 book. If you want an introduction to polyamory that covers all the basics there are other books I would recommend like "The Smart Girl's Guide To Polyamory" by Dedecker Winston or "Ready For Polyamory" by Laura Boyle. But Polywise is more of a 101 book than Polysecure is. Maybe Polysecure is really a 103 book with Polywise being 102.

Whhat do I have to say about the contents of Polywise? Honestly not much despite everything I prefaced it with. The book is good and i liked quite a bit! But like the last book, it is meaty intellectual topics that make your brain think. Which makes it a bit hard to summarize and untangle in a simple review without going page by page. I do like how much focus is put on how many little tiny things change when going from monogamy to non-monogamy that you wouldn't think of or plan for. Also the whole book has an angle of not just monogamy to non-monogamy but also one form of non-monogamy to a different form of non-monogamy. It is very thought-provoking. From my favorite chapter was on codependency & differentiation. It was amazing to have words for these phenomenons I had personally observed serveral times but didn't know what to call it. I feel like that chapter in particular will be really useful to a lot of people. Finally there was a lot of unpacking old habits that were once useful but are now harmful. It really shines a spotlight on the shift to non-monogamy being a really big change that I don't think a lot of newbies often understand.

I highly recommend Polywise: A Deeper Dive Into Navigating Open Relationships by Jessica Fern & David Cooley. I think it is a better book than Polysecure. My caveat is I don't know if it should be the very first book you read about Polyamory.

[rene-hl-trashcan]

OC/MC Alternate Universe Ask Game

So, I was inspired when @starry-slithers asked me what would my gremlin's role/actions if they were stuck in a zombie apocalypse AU and I thought of doing this list.

Reblog/Link this list so your followers can ask about your MC / OC's role or actions in the AUs! (Who knows if it can double as a writing prompt too?🤣)

(Part 1 for now until I get more inspiration and do another one)

source image

Zombie Apocalypse AU (What kind of zombie apocalypse? RE-style zombie? Train to Busan-style zombie? How do they deal with it? What is their role in the AU? How long would they survive? If they turn, will there be a miracle where they don't hurt their loved ones? How would they be put down and by who if they turned?)

80s/90s slasher AU (Are they the killer? If they are, how do they hunt their prey? Or are they the final survivor? If they are, how do they defeat the killer? Or are they the first to die? If they die, how did they die?)

Idol AU (What position do they have in the group? Or are they a solo artist? Any challenges they had to face as an idol? Do they find love in a fellow idol or a fan? If so, how does that relationship works?)

College AU (What is their major? Or are they the professor? How do they cope with college life? Do they have a scholarship? Will they enjoy crazy college life or will they stick to studying?)

Forgotten God/Deity AU (What kind of forgotten deity would they be? Why were they forgotten? How were they in their prime? Do they still have a believer, or are they vanishing because their last believer passed away?)

Mermaid/Siren AU (What kind of mermaid/siren are they? What do they look like? Do they have human-like disguises to lure their victims? How do they lure their victims? If they're not born mermaids, how were they turned into one?)

A/B/O AU - recommended guide made by my friend if you're interested (What are their A/B/O gender? How did that affect their life? How do they meet their pair/mate? How do they cope with societal challenges/life as whatever their second gender is?)

Monster/Monster Hunter AU (What kind of monsters are they? If they are the hunter, who do they work for? Weapons of choice for hunter, signature feature for monsters? Do they find love in their enemy? If so, how? And how do they deal with the opposition against their love?)

Actor/Hollywood AU (What kind of drama/movies they usually star in? What are the roles they usually get? Were they well-loved or controversial? What are they like during interviews/promotions? What kind of style do they go for while attending award shows/Met Gala?)

Influencer/Content Creator AU (What kind of influencers/content creators are they? What types of content do they make? What is their fanbase like? Does their fanbase have its own name? If so, what it is and why? What platform do they prefer?)

Medical Drama AU (What are their role in the hospital? General physician? Specialist doctor? How are their bedside manner with their patients? Do the hospital staff like them? How do they wind down after a gruelling workday? How do they cope if they lose a patient? How professional are they at work? Are they good doctors or the diabolical ones? If they're diabolical, how and why?)

Medical Supernatural AU (What supernatural shit happens in the hospital? Is the hospital for the supernatural folks, or is it a regular hospital but your MC was affected by an unexpected event like in Ghost Doctor K-drama? How do they cope with the supernatural stuff?)

Pirate AU (What kind of pirates are they? The chaotic but good ones like Jack Sparrow or the heinous ones like the historical pirates? Do they have a love interest? If so, is that love interest a rival pirate/navy officer hunting for them/others? What is their main purpose of being a pirate? How do they climb the hierarchy?)

Crime Drama AU (What are the roles of your MC in the AU? The detective/cops? If so, what kind of crimes are usually assigned to them? Or are they the criminal? If so, what kind of criminal are they? Is the police corrupt? If so, are your MCs corrupted? Why/why not?)

Harem Drama/Concubine AU - (What kind of harem they are in? Is the lord/lady they serve kind to them? Do they fight fair to be the top concubine? Or are they the types to fight dirty to gain power? If so, how do they eliminate their rival? Are rival's children off the table or will they go all out to gain power?)

Superpower/EVOL AU - (What kind of superpower do they have? Were they born with it, or were they experimented on? How do they use the power? Are there any side effects of the power? Do they like their power? Why/Why not? Were they on the side of the law or were they on the opposite side? Why/Why not?)

Soulmate AU - (What are the soulmate rules of the AU? Do they believe in/like the soulmate thing? Will they fight the determined destiny to be with the person they like? Will they resist their soulmate to prove that destiny cannot control their life?)

Coffee Shop AU - (Are they the barista, manager or the customer? If they're the customer, what kind of customer are they? Do they have preferred orders? What time do they usually come to the coffee shop? If they are the staff, what are their customer service style?)

Fairy Tales AU - (What is the fairy tale story they are set in? What is their role/archetype in the story? Do they subvert the traditional expectations of the roles or not? If so, how do they do it?)

Step-parent AU - (Why do they choose to date/marry someone with a child? Does the child like them? How do they treat the step-child? If they have their own child, will the treatment be different? How do they deal with negative reactions from the step-child?)

Spy/Undercover AU - (What is the organisation they work for? Are they good or bad? What is the purpose they go undercover? What kind of spy/undercover agent are they? How do they conduct their mission? What would they do if they were caught? What will they do if they fall in love with the enemy?)

Isekai AU - (What kind of story would they get isekai-ed into? What is the character they transmigrated as? Will they stick to the original plot, or will they change it? If they change it, how would they do so? What would be their main goal after realising they have been isekai-ed?)

Holy War AU - (What kind of religious system are they fighting for/against? Why are they supporting/fighting the religious system? What are their role and position in this AU?)

Exorcist/Ghost Whisperer AU - (How do they get their ability? Are they kind towards or are they scared of the ghosts/supernaturals? How do they exorcise the supernatural? How do they use the whisperer's ability to deal with the supernatural folks? Do they appreciate their ability or do they wish it to be gone? Why/Why not?)

Arranged Marriage AU - (What era does this set place in? Does their spouse love/like them? How do they treat the spouse that they do not love? Why are they in an arranged marriage in the first place? Will they fall in love with their spouse? If so, how will it happen? Will they cheat on their spouse with their actual lover? If so, will they feel guilty about it? Will the spouse accept it?)

Shapeshifter AU - (What kind of creature do they shapeshift into? Why? Is there any specific time they will shapeshift or will they have full control over when to shapeshift? Is it a common thing everyone does or will they have to keep it a secret? Any cute love story that comes from their shapeshifting shenanigan? If there is, how does it happen?)

NSFW/Mature AU under the cut

Serial Killer AU (What kind of serial killers are they? What are their motives behind the killings? Bonus point if it's not childhood trauma. Do they collect trophies from their victims? What are their modus operandi? Any specific murder method they favour? Do they torture their victims? Who are their target victims? Why do they choose these poor souls? How do they discard/dispose of their victims? Do they taunt the authorities? If so, how and why haven't they arrested?)

Camboy/Camgirl AU (What kind of stuff do they usually do while streaming? Are they into roleplay? If so, what kind of roles do they do for their shows? Do they like the job, or do they do it for survival? What would be their stage name for the job? Are they the people-pleaser type who do everything their viewers ask for, or are they the type of are in control and put their viewers in place? What are their target demographic?)

Stripper/Prostitute/Porn Stars AU (What kind of establishment do they work for? Is that establishment kind and fair to them? How happy are they with the job? What kind of people are on their clientele list? Do they enjoy the job? Are there any costumes/kinks they favour? Do they wish for another job? Why are they in the field in the first place?)

Organised Crime AU (What kind of organised crime do they do? What would be their position in the organisation? How do they prefer to eliminate rivals? How do they deal with traitors? Do they like leaving warnings to the authorities/rivals? If so, how do they do that? Do they have a forbidden love interest in law enforcement? If so, how do they approach that love? Would they betray their organisation or would they abduct, manipulate and gaslight their love interest?)

Power Abuse AU (What kind of situation are we talking about? Is it Sovereign/Servant, Scientist/Experiment subject, Boss/Staff, Loan shark/Debtor or other situations? What kind of power/role do they have and how do they abuse their authority? Are there any exceptions to their power abuse? If there are, why the exception? Do their victims retaliate? Was that retaliation successful? Why/why not? What are their response/reaction to the retaliation?)

Stalker AU (What is the reason they stalk the victim? How do they stalk their victim? Is their obsession fatally dangerous, or it's only traumatisingly creepy? Will they be arrested? If so, why? Will they cross the line from mentally traumatising their victims to physically harming their victims? If yes, how will they do it?)

[aphroditestearsofjoy]

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭 📜

Before my new schoolyear starts I want to write a guide on how I am going to keep up with all my subjects. I will also include my study habits for this year, since they make sure I have the time and mindset in order to properly study.

𝕊𝕥𝕦𝕕𝕪 𝕙𝕒𝕓𝕚𝕥𝕤:

🪷 I prelearn for every subject (except old Greek and Latin). That means I study the concepts before class, so I can use class for revision and ask all my questions.

🪷 Make a week overview of what needs to be done, then decide every morning what schoolwork to focus on. This way it's easier to adjust to unexpected plans.

🪷 When summarizing, I make sure I understand everything that I write down. If I don't, I will search for more information until I can explain it in my own words!

🪷 Nothing gets me in the mood to study, like making tea. I will make herbal tea or a matcha latte while grabbing everything I need to study after school.

𝕃𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕟/ 𝕆𝕝𝕕 𝔾𝕣𝕖𝕖��:

🪷 The last few years I haven't studied a lot of words, to make up for it, I want to pay a little bit of extra attention to studying words. If I know more words, translating will go way easier since I won't have to search up every word in the dictionary. On school days and Sundays, I will study words for 10 minutes a day for either old Greek or Latin. I will study the words using Studygo (huge recommendation for other Dutch folks).

🪷 Another thing I lack with both subjects is my knowledge about grammar. And this is a HUGE problem while doing homework, translating texts and for finishing tests on time. I know how to use grammar, but I don't know most of it by heart. So I will study grammar for 10 minutes a day for both subjects on schooldays and Sundays until I've caught up. From then on, I will only occasionally memorize grammar. Studying grammar consists of literary saying it aloud like some song or poem until I know it well enough and then writing it down way too many times.

🪷 I also want to practise translating more. Since this is the most important skill for both subjects and I haven't done most of my work for the past years, I will make up for it by practising easier texts. Every Sunday, I will translate an extra paragraph for each subject that I will let my teachers correct the following Monday. I will do this until I am satisfied with my translating abilities.

🪷 This year I want to make all my homework for old Greek and Latin. Past years I skipped most of the work, and now I notice that I need more practise. I will study a few days before a test, but nothing more.

𝕄𝕒𝕥𝕙:

🪷 I love maths (controversial opinion, I know). But I believe that when you understand maths, you will love it! But how do you understand it? You should memorize the basics. When you study about a specific topic, watch or read an explanation and make notes. Make sure to make space in the notes for the basics, like concepts you've already learned that has a connection with your new topic. In order to make sure I know how to properly use the topic, I will solve or write down the solution of a practise question next to an explanation as to who I took that step. If I were to get really lost later on, I can follow these steps, but with the new question. Then the most important thing: Practise a lot! Even if it's hard at first. The more problems you solve, the more problems you get. You don't want to waste time when you don't know what to do. So read the question and start thinking what you need to do to solve it. If you genuinely don't have an any idea, look at the solution. But, you won't just look at the solution, you will study it, you look at the steps they take and ask yourself with every step why they took that specific step. When you are done studying the answer, make the question again. I personally write down the questions I struggled with most, to practise them again for my exam!

ℙ𝕙𝕪𝕤𝕚𝕔𝕤:

🪷 Physics is my favourite and one of my best subjects. I always start out with summarizing the concepts in my own words. The biggest problem I have with physics is understanding all the concepts that I can use them together. To make sure I get everything, I summarize. The parts I do not understand, I will watch a video about. Then I start with making exercises, I will look through the exercises and make at least one about every concept. I will make more about the concepts that didn't go well, until I get them right. To prepare for tests, I read through my summary and make lots of practise questions. I will revise everything that didn't go well and remake the questions that went wrong.

ℂ𝕙𝕖𝕞𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕪:

🪷 When studying chemistry, I mainly try to focus on practise. I would start out with reading the learning outcomes and then actively the entire text. I mark thing I find important, write the questions down that come to mind when reading, and connect information. Then I make a small summary in the format of a mind map. I write down only the most important concepts. Then I start making a lot of exercises about the concept, until I can do them comfortably and without mistakes. Afterwards, I make flashcards using the learning outcomes. By doing this afterwards I make sure I know the best way to answer, and with chemistry lots of question come up while doing the work. When studying for a test, I use the flashcards and remaking the questions I struggled most with.

𝔻𝕦𝕥𝕔𝕙:

🪷 This year I'm preparing for my Dutch finals. To work on my skill, I mainly have to make past finals. I really want to make a summary about all the concepts that come back on the finals. But other that, we mainly have exercises that I can't prepare in advance for. I do really want to expand my vocabulary, because it makes me feel fancy. I should start reading the news more, that way I will also be more informed about the world.

𝔼𝕟𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕙:

🪷 This year I am taking a Cambridge English exam. My goal is to score a C-Level (advanced). In order to do this I must work on my grammar, vocabulary, writings and listening. I will tackle each property with a guide on how to get better at them.

🪷 My grammar is pretty good, my only problem. I don't know the actual rules. When writing, having a grammatical correct structure kind of happens on its own. Most of the time, that's very helpful, but when I have to point out mistakes in high quality or older texts, I can't. In order to work on this, I would recommend using an actual book. The one I'm starting out with this year is "Advanced Grammar in Use with Answers' from Martin Hewings. I will work through it by reading the theory, using it on my own, and then making the exercises in the book.

🪷 To expand my vocabulary I will write down new words I see when interacting with English content and books and study them. The goal is to learn 30 words a week. I will add all the words to an anki list, so that I can keep practising older words.

🪷 During the proficiency exam it's expected from you that you are able to write formal letters, essays, reports and reviews. To practise, I will write one of these a week and ask my teacher for feedback. I will also use the writing site from Cambridge, where they I've you a writing a prompt, and you can submit your text and let them corrected by professionals. For people who are not able to ask their teacher for help, I would recommend using ChatGPT. Although this is not ideal, it will still help you improve.

🪷 By listening to a daily podcast in English, I will practise my listening skills. It's very important to practise your English listening skills without visual guidance. Of course watching movies will help you improve, but if you want to improve in the shortest amount of time, you need to listen to audios.

ℍ𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪:

🪷 I personally find history one of the easiest subjects to study. I study history by chapter and not by paragraph. I always read through the entire chapter and then make a timeline with all the information. So I will include all the concepts, names and everything else in my timeline. Then I will study it by talking through it like I am teaching someone. Every time I miss something while explaining, I will memorize it again. I write down all the most important concepts down a few times, so I will remember how they are spelled and don't make any mistakes on my test! I don't make many exercises since they don't really help me that much. But if I have the time and energy, I make a few of the questions that were asked on previous finals.

𝔹𝕚𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕘𝕪:

🪷 Biology is a very information heavy subject, and I find that it's pretty easy to get lost in all the concepts. I have a pretty strict guide for myself, so I can study biology in the least amount of time. I will start out by reading the learning outcomes for the paragraph, so I know what the most important things are. Then I start actively reading through the paragraph. I mark thing I find important, write the questions down that come to mind when reading, and connect information. Afterwards, I will summarize everything in a mind map. Not just one mind map for every chapter, but one for every group of concepts that fit together well. These mind maps are very big and have all the relevant information, that's why you should minimize the amount of topics on a mind map, because otherwise it won't fit. Then I make the most important exercises and start studying the summaries by pretending that I'm giving a presentation about them, everything that I forget to mention I will memorize again. The day before the test, I will write down the explanation of all the learning outcomes from memory and correct them. Lastly, l review all the concepts that I lacked in.

Be sure to like, comment and reblog! If you like my content, consider buying me a book. <3 Sending you all the love, ~ Pearl 🐚

[dcdreamblog]

I just want to commend you for your graceful handling of people propping up conspiracy theories on superheroes secret identities and also shitting down anything that is more for a gossip rag than a historian. I feel like I would be ripping my hair out in your place

A friend asked me recently how I keep my sanity in my line of work when it seems like every day I'm dealing with fringe theories and conspiratorial wingnuts. I'm sure from the outside looking in it must seem like I'm constantly dealing with the worst of the worst and I feel like its worth covering something of my perspective and what my day to day job is actually like, zeroing in on the reason this blog exists and why I am honestly excited to do it everyday.

(The photograph of the Amnesty Bay lighthouse I took on my last night before college) I grew up in the city of Amnesty Bay on the far eastern coast of the US State of Maine, which is on the furthest eastern extreme of the country's main landmass in general. When I was very young I was caught up in a supervillain attack that was thwarted by Aquaman that, due to uniquely stupid decisions on my part left me with a scar I carry to this day. Ever since then I have been OBSESSED with superheroes. Now that doesn't mean a lot, most people like superheroes to one degree or another. What boy doesn't go through a Superman phase in middle school? If you live in a city with a hometown hero like I do we all cheer them on where and when we can. That wasn't me. The more I learned, the more I wanted to, becoming particularly enamored with the sense of history and legacy that superheroes hold. A sacred bond and vow passed from the late 30s all the way to the present day, a living, growing example to mankind of not only what is RIGHT but also what's possible. The existence of superheroes showed us things that seem impossible from what we used to believe. Aliens, magic, technology that breaks understood laws of physics into tinder. The extranormal has expanded humanity's horizon of what IS to unfathomable depths that we might never fully catch up to. But that's not what my day to day job is. I am a tour guide at a museum. I show people around and I tell them stories about the members of the All Star Squadron. It's not especially controversial history, if you disagree with "nazis bad" we generally just show you the door with great force. We're always discovering new details, further shaping and molding the history like the increasing resolution of a camera but the broad strokes are pretty well understood. I work in perhaps the ONE specialty in superhero studies where the story has, for the most part, been written. And that's great, it's important history to share, my job is wonderful and I wake up every single more ecstatic to do it again. BUT...that academic part of me that was ignited by the idea of pushing the fringe of what we know to be true? To be POSSIBLE? I need to keep feeding that part of myself. Already I have seen my profession start to get measured for the walls of academia. This is me kicking open the door and answering all comers. My JOB is to repeat the settled history and increase its understanding. My HOBBY, this blog here? Is people pitching me the most batshit fastballs they can come up with and its my job to duck before it takes out my teeth. I am tossing my line into the dark and seeing what I catch. Screw the settled history, the academic regalia and the notions of what's obvious, polite or sensical. This blog has forced me to make professional connections with former government agents, wizards and at least one talking gorilla. This blog inspired me to volunteer myself sorting through 80 year old trash for half my day and I zip downstairs like the fucking Flash when its artifact time. I have held beta lyrics to a Greg Saunders song written on the inside of a candy wrapper, an original pair of Doctor Midnite's goggles and just this morning I tripped over a metal foot so mashed with German airplane parts that Robotman just took it off at the ankle and made a new one! I am looking the misinformation and conspiracies dead in the eye and kicking them back into the pit they came from, how many academics can say that in a field so new? I have a Christmas card from UNCLE @#$%^& SAM hanging on a cork board by my head as I write this. How have I survived this this long? The important question is how fast someone would have to kill me to make me give this shit up!

[synapsid-taxonomy]

On Smilodon mouth tissue

Keep in mind through this entire post that this is pretty rough and I don't specifically study sabercats. But we might as well take a closer look at the controversial Smilodon lip and gum tissue and see what it'd look like step-by-step. Let's start with a Smilodon skull (real fossil, not cast) with articulated sabers. Keep in mind the tip of this saber is broken off.

You can pretty clearly see the division between the enamel-covered portion of the teeth and the cementum. In modern felids, this cementoenamel junction is roughly where the gum line ends, and this is also what Riviere and Wheeler 2005 concluded for Smilodon. So if we take that and apply a gumline to this skull, it looks like this:

Now that looks like a pretty deep gumline! The full canines of Smilodon don't necessarily need to be covered by lips; even though they are covered by enamel, it's a very thin coating that doesn't require extensive hydration. This is also the case with the fangs of musk deer and Chinese water deer, who have their canines hanging on the outside of the mouth. These fanged deer, as well as tusked synapsids like walruses and Tiarajudens, have canines that project far beyond the bottom of the lower jaw (see below for the alternative) - and none have the massive bloodhound lips you may see around for Smilodon.

The gums, however, would need to be hydrated and covered by the lips. So that pink line could be an indicator of the minimum extent of the lip margin. But what I notice about these gumline comparisons is that we're looking only at the skull. If you bring in Smilodon's mandible and articulate it so that the mouth is closed...

The gumline doesn't go below the margin of the lower jaw. So the upper lips would not need to droop beyond the margin of the lower jaw. And as discussed above, the rest of the canines wouldn't necessarily need to be covered. Goodbye bloodhound Smilodon. This is consistent with how the lips do not droop beyond the margin of the mandible in any "saber-toothed" animal. Fanged deer and walruses have exposed canines. Clouded leopards keep their impressively-sized canines in the mouth; while the lips are relatively big, they don't droop over the lower jaw...

And saber-toothed animals that aren't smilodontines - including other true sabercats like Homotherium - don't actually have teeth that project beyond the bottom of the lower jaw (accounting for tooth slippage). Most of them have a deepened "chin" that follows the sabers. So it's possible, if not likely, that these animals simply had sabers covered by the soft tissue of the lower jaw when the mouth was closed. That would keep the teeth and gums moist regardless of how far down the gums went. Even if the teeth were exposed, the upper lips still wouldn't need to go very far down to keep the gums moist (you can see where the cementoenamel joint is on the Eusmilus skull replica in the lower right).

(top: Homotherium; bottom left, Thylacosmilus)

Now let's take the rigorous reconstruction of Smilodon from Turner et al. 2011 - and overlay it over the image above, to see if "traditional" Smilodon lips would cover all of this expanded gumline or not.

That looks like a pretty close match, I'd say! Being generous (and looking at clouded leopards as a very rough guide), I can see the margin of the upper lip maybe going like this. Lippier than usually pictured, but not shockingly so.

So not much would change.

Now, why would Smilodon need such deep gums? Simple - the longer a tooth is, the easier it is to break off. So more extensive gum tissue would help stabilize the sabers in the mouth. Which makes sense. The current model for sabercat predation is that they would subdue prey using their beefy muscled forelimbs, and only use the sabers at the end for the killing neck-puncturing bite. Don't wanna break them beforehand.

[exsanguidus]

Controversial opinion; I think Ascended Astarion is the true Astarion. In DnD lore, vampirism amplifies a person's traits for whoever they are at the time they become a true vampire. A Paladin wanting to save people will end up ruling a city with an iron fist to keep people safe. A mage wanting to heal those they love will hurt everyone else to heal them. Astarion was on a journey with Tav - one from being controlled, owned, and tortured to being free, curious, and even powerful. Becoming a full vampire and ascending just amplified that. It forced a self-actualization, not a descent into villainy. I think Ascended Astarion is cannon Astarion. He will always be a vampire, and vampires in DnD are always the amplification of a true self. Without ascention, he is still malleable - but I don't think its what he wants. He wants to be powerful (protected by his own power too - his power being a means to self-preservation), he wants to be loved, seen, and free. Free of hunger, free to walk in the sun, free of Cazador. All these things are true regardless of the path you choose. But, they are all only attainable through ascension. When you ascend Astarion - he gets everything he wants and becomes who he truly is.

I'm going to start this with a disclaimer:

I work in the mental health field professionally and majored in Social & Behavioral Science, which is partly why I felt drawn to Astarion as a sort of case study. Characters rooted in trauma are interesting to me and I enjoy picking them apart to judge how real it feels. I utilize my educational and professional background to essentially guide how I write Astarion on this account.

That said, despite me being a professional in the field, all of what I have to say is my personal opinion and interpretation of Astarion's character based on how I interpret the material Larian gave us and the material that can be found in DND lore. Even in real life, things have variation and not all mental health struggles (getting over trauma is part of mental health) present the exact same way. There are theories that exist to try and explain some trends in mental health studies, psychology, and sociology, but again they're called theories for a reason.

Now, my response to this question will be under the cut and will include spoilers.

I know what lore in particular you're referencing, anon, because I've been going back to it a lot ever since I opened this account.

Astarion very much has an insecure attachment style born from his abuse at Cazador's hands. Specifically, an anxious-avoidant attachment type that leans more towards avoidant when he's first met and then begins to swing more towards anxious as he begins to get closer to Tav and the other companions.

Anxious-avoidant attachment types (also known as the “fearful or disorganized type”) bring together the worst of both worlds. Anxious-avoidants are not only afraid of intimacy and commitment, but they distrust and lash out emotionally at anyone who tries to get close to them. Anxious-avoidants often spend much of their time alone and miserable, or in abusive or dysfunctional relationships. Anxious-avoidants are low in confidence and less likely to express emotions, preferring to suppress them. However, they can have intense emotional outbursts when under stress. They also don’t tend to seek help when in need due to a distrust of others. This sucks because they are also incapable of sorting through their own issues. Anxious-avoidants really get the worst of both worlds. They avoid intimacy not because they prefer to be alone like avoidants. Rather, they avoid intimacy because they are so terrified of its potential to hurt them (Mark Manson, Attachment Styles and How They Affect Your Relationships).

Typically, most studies of Attachment Theory focus on the relationship of parents-children or romantic partners, but it can also be applied to any significant relationship someone has in their lifetime. Attachment styles thus are capable of changing based on new relationship experiences.

If you end up giving him the "good" ending where he denies the Ascension, it's implied in his final dialogue that he's actively working towards having a secure attachment type due to the influences of his fellow worm-afflicted associates - particularly Tav.

I think that it's important to also note that, even if Tav doesn't romantically connect with Astarion, he shows hints of desperately wanting someone to care for him, support him, and love him. He does want to know what sex would be like as something other than a tool, and especially what it would be like to actually want to have it just for the pure sake of enjoying having it.

You have to understand that Astarion doesn't even understand the concept of casual sex or friends with benefits. All those times he had to seduce people for Cazador was not casual sex or a friends with benefits situation. All of them were transactions with a means to an end. He got nothing out of seducing those victims besides the possibility of not incurring Cazador's wrath that night - but even then, there was still a possibility because Cazador was an abuser.

Abusers are incapable of providing genuine safety, but can manipulate their victims into believing an illusion of safety. Often times, they manipulate their victims into this by using phrases like "you made me do this by being disobedient", "it wouldn't come to this if you just did what you were told", and then weaponizing basic needs such as shelter, food, and social interaction. The bare minimum becomes something the victim is expected to be grateful for and viewed as a favor, which means anything beyond the bare minimum is expected to be viewed as a theatrical showing of care and love.

In game, Tav has the chance to hear Astarion tell the story of how Cazador turned him. He basically states that he got attacked by a mob due to a ruling he handed down when he was magistrate and then Cazador saved him and offered him immortality. It can be inferred that in his pre-vampiric days, Astarion had no idea that Cazador was abusive to his spawn.

This is likely because it seems that Cazador is careful about his public image. He doesn't allow his spawn to drink from humans, very likely not just as a means to further oppress them and dampen their potential power they could get from drinking people's blood, but also as a way to ensure there's not just a bunch of people out in the city being bitten and left alive to tell the story - or left dead on the street suspiciously.

He has his spawn seduce and lure people, particularly lower class people that would be harder for general society to realize is missing or just that he knows people who could actually challenge him wouldn't care for (you learn that reading some of the books and notes in Szarr Palace). The only exception to this is the kidnapping of Gur children, but even then it seems to fit his MO as it seems Gur are considered somewhat outcasts from the rest of Baldurian society due to their cultural differences.

It should also be noted that he himself doesn't do these seductions or kidnappings. He specifically chooses spawn to be his lackeys and that's likely so, if shit hits the fan and the spawn gets caught, he has deniability since he wasn't there. It's methodical and thought out to keep as many eyes away from him so he can still obtain what he wants and keep sailing under the radar.

Cazador is this methodical and purposeful as a result of his own trauma, which we learn about from the skull of his master in the dungeon of Szaar Palace. There's one interaction in particular with the skull in which Tav can learn that, at one point, Cazador attempted to rebel and usurp his master. Cazador failed and his master punished him via impalement. Not because Cazador had the audacity to try and usurp him, but because Cazador tried and failed. Cazador's master punished Cazador via torture because his master was disgusted by the fact that his spawn was too weak to succeed in such a plot.

Which brings me to my next point... it's not uncommon for victims of abuse to later become abusers. Hence the term Cycle of Abuse exists. Many abusers who were once victims often have the mentality of either "I'm not nearly as bad as my abuser was, they should be grateful I care enough to not be so bad" or "I survived and it made me tougher, they need to suck it up and let it help them build character" or both. They often fail to view their abuse as abuse and fail to recognize how their experience as abuse victims contributes into making them toxic and abusive to others.

There's many peer-reviewed scholarly articles you can find about the cycle of abuse, but one I particularly find useful is Editorial: Dissociation, and cycles of abuse across generations by David P.H. Jones. It talks specifically about parents and children, but I believe some of the general points made can be applied to Cazador and his spawn, as he crafts a very family-like setting that can be seen in the way that his spawn refer to one another as brothers and sisters.

This would thus make him the father figure, a role exponentially made important by the fact he denies his spawn education on things that could serve to give them ideas or the ability to leave him (for example, Astarion mentions that none of the spawn were permitted to learn about the language of the various symbols around the palace) and he consistently chooses his Golden Children (Favored Spawns) as a means of providing more false security. Do what he says, when he says, exactly how he says and don't complain then you will have benefits. You will be Favored, and to have his favor is the highest honor you could achieve.

Torture is clearly presented as Cazador's primary go-to for discipline. Research has also concluded that trauma has a way of affecting the brain and memories.

Trauma can prevent information (like words, images, sounds, etc.) from different parts of the brain from combining to make a semantic memory. The temporal lobe and inferior parietal cortex collect information from different brain areas to create semantic memory (The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine).

Astarion mentions a few times in-game that he can barely remember his life before Cazador, if at all, and a huge part of that is likely because of all the trauma Cazador inflicted upon him that exacerbated the natural occurrence of memory loss from aging (if vampires experience natural memory loss from aging, that is). This is most likely true for all of Cazador's spawn.

I say all this as a set up to truly answering you, anon, specifically where you say: "from being controlled, owned, and tortured to being free, curious, and even powerful. Becoming a full vampire and ascending just amplified that. It forced a self-actualization, not a descent into villainy."

I can argue that Astarion did not feel free up until after a decision to Ascend or not was made. And I argue that stance due to some dialogue he can have with Tav here he basically states that the power Ascension could guarantee that no one, even someone after Cazador is dead, could ever come in to oppress and hurt him again. Even with Cazador dead, he has such an intense fear of being enslaved and used that he turns to catastrophic thoughts as justification to why he needs to Ascend.

Catastrophic thinking is a cognitive distortion that occurs when people have a hard time weighing the likelihood of certain outcomes and believe that terrible or catastrophic outcomes—which are highly unlikely—become, in one’s mind, salient and extremely likely. (Tom Zaubler, MD, MPH).

Aside from the Gur, whom Astarion can manage to evade and even kill perfectly fine as just a spawn, we're not presented with any hints of another big bad in the vampire world that could possibly want Astarion. As such, there's not really any tangible threat, but rather a perceived threat that he believes is destined to darken his doorstep at any time.

His catastrophic thinking is a trauma response. His belief that he needs to be the most powerful being in the room as a way to be truly free is a trauma response. Cazador broke him down emotionally, mentally, physically, and sexually to make him believe that he was weak and trapped. Furthermore, that he remained trapped because he was too weak to do anything about it.

You see how this goes full circle into how Cazador's master punished Cazador for not being able to successfully usurp him? It places blame on the victim, allowing shame and helplessness to root that the abuser can manipulate. We know that Astarion definitely feels shame because he tells Tav that. For most of his dialogue until the boss fight, he's constantly bringing up that he did what Cazador wanted and acted obedient because he had no choice.

This is true, he had to act in self-preservation to survive and unfortunately that meant he had to be subservient. A few dialogue choices you can have your Tav pick can challenge Astarion and say he could have still tried, to which he'll rightfully tell Tav that Tav has no right to judge him for the choices he made to survive.

When Astarion encounters Sebastian in the dungeon, its made pretty obvious how much guilt and shame he truly feels. Furthermore, that for all Astarion's protesting and exclaiming that no one has the right to judge him, a part of him did believe that he didn't do enough to try and escape enslavement. A part of himself blamed himself and believed he allowed himself to be abused when, in reality, he was put in a horrible situation with very limited options. He did the best he could in the moment, with what information he had in those moments.

I also want to argue that who Astarion is when we meet him isn't his true self. It's who he had to become in order to survive Cazador. Astarion doesn't even know who his true self is because he didn't have the opportunity to explore his own likes and preferences. Cazador molded all of his spawn because he had a specific purpose for them.

Not only that, but since Cazador would have to more directly deal with these spawn since he used them as lackies, he also would have molded them to behave in ways to his preference so that he wouldn't find their presence unbearable and feel inclined to murder them out of annoyance. This is also where the Favored Spawn being separated and set on a pedestal comes into play. Those who could please him and play to his wants and needs had better benefits. If all of the spawn are acting in self-preservation, they would want to be favored and thus would want to adapt themselves to things Cazador liked and approved of.

This would mean learning to be cruel to those less fortunate and not doing anything as charity. This is the reason why Astarion approves of some questionable decisions Tav can make. Astarion learned his ideals and morality from Cazador because he had to so he could know how to please Cazador and stay in his master's good graces. After a while, even if you started off disagreeing, forcing yourself to act a certain way can become a habit that sticks with you. You convince yourself to enjoy it too so it's easier to swallow.

Astarion craves power because he knows that power is the quickest, easiest, and - what he believes - most effective way to prevent him from having to use that method ever again. It's logical to want power to solve that.

You said in your ask: "He wants to be powerful (protected by his own power too - his power being a means to self-preservation), he wants to be loved, seen, and free. Free of hunger, free to walk in the sun, free of Cazador. All these things are true regardless of the path you choose. But, they are all only attainable through ascension. When you ascend Astarion - he gets everything he wants and becomes who he truly is."

In the most literal of terms, yes, Ascension gives him all of those. However, since the basis of him believing he needs power to be free is rooted in fear, that's not actually really freedom. That is still his fear ruling over him.

There's a stark difference in what someone wants versus what they need. He wants power, to be seen, to be loved, and to be free. What he actually needs is security, stability, support, consistency, empathy, and autonomy. The things he wants is what he believes will solve the empty cups of what he needs, and he believes that because the only example he had on how to act to get what you want - until the events of the game - was Cazador. He literally had no other example of how to get your needs met except through selfishness, cruelty, force, manipulation, and abuse.

Again, I reiterate. The Astarion we first meet is not Astarion's true nature. Astarion's true nature was corrupted by his abuse from Cazador and the subsequent trauma that followed. If it had been his true nature, he would have happily been Cazador's subject because their true natures would have been in alignment.

It only becomes his true nature if he allows that trauma to define him and decides that he needs to embrace it rather than fight it. That is then what gets amplified because that fear that roots those wants becomes amplified.

Honestly, it's impossible to say what would be canon for Astarion because there's too many factors.

Studies have shown that having more supportive and positive influences, even if its later in life after leaving the abuser, tends to work in favor of the victim breaking the cycle of abuse. As such, I think that if you make a Tav who's core values are autonomy, consent, second chances, and redemption and somehow manage to get high enough approval that he'd even consider caring what they think; then its more likely that Astarion would reject Ascension due to observing how much softer, kinder, patient, and merciful Tav is.

But if its a Tav that has no interest in getting to know him beyond the surface or Tav doesn't exist at all, I honestly think he would end up going through with Ascension. Mostly because, to me, it seems like he didn't really bother to have more than surface level interactions with the other companions and the other companions really only ended up getting to know him better as a result to Tav managing to get past his masking. He does not lower his mask on his own accord, only after certain things are done and said by Tav.

Unfortunately, I just don't really think any of the other companions you can pick up in-game would really be able to provide support and determined consistency in the same way that players can make Tav. Hence I don't think he'd end up caring enough about any of them to ever start to think that perhaps freedom can be defined differently than the way he initially believes, and would view Ascension as the only right way to get his needs fulfilled.

[bethanydelleman]

Giggling at your and anon wishing instead for OPTIONS for Fanny. I was thinking it's odd that Ms. Austen decided that her crush on Edmund was reciprocated at the end when she could've been given justice of some sort with how she's been looked and talked over.

It feels like she's out of choices but then I suppose she is out of choices in the end. This is a woman who is shy in an era where you gotta put yourself out there to be seen by the society and she's not even on a level in a society for her to be out and noticed by the gentlemen even if she does, rank-wise

Which is why my friend and I (who has no talent whatsoever in writing) been talking about this writing idea; a boarding school AU where all the Austen ladies is in it,

Mind you we were just going by vibe and not accurate research, so we put Elinor Dashwood, and Maria Bertram, Mary Crawford and Lucy Steele, Caroline Bingley are in the same year, being the oldest

Eleanor Tilney, Jane Bennet, Emma, and Jane Fairfax are in the same year below the others already mentioned

Elizabeth and Marianne are in the year below them

Mary Bennet and Harriet

Catherine Morland and Lydia Bennet

(the ages are 13-18)

Anne Elliot is one of the matrons

This is kind of controversial, for me and I'm not really a fan of this concept myself tbh, but it'll be kind of a fanfictiony story like the Bridgerton with the society being a little more lenient (lol?); because it's a mixed boarding school

The plot is basically all the stuff in the Austen og universe but they're not all the same, the ages can be tweaked a bit lol, with some plot tangled with the other stories but they're leading to the same endings like, so.....

Catherine doesn't marry while studying, but she keeps talking about the Tilneys because she has a penpal whom she met in Bath before school started, she didn't realize that said penpal has a sister who studies in the same school

Catherine's really that student that just spent most of her time in the library, not studying per se, reading novels, she often has to be told to focus in class for daydreaming

and then one summer vacation spends the entire break at Northanger Abbey,

Later, after new semester starts, Lydia tells her sister in an offhand remark that Catherine seemed really down and her visit to Northanger seemed to be the reason.

Her studies decline even more when she was upset about the whole Gen Tilney situation and one evening she goes to their dorm matron to ask for advice; that's Anne, and there Catherine finds a crying Lucy Steele who had just been visited by Fanny Dashwood and basically well, verbally harassed by a visiting older sister of Edward Ferrars

My friend was adamant we either pair up Fanny Price with an oc (original character) or with~~ Colonel Fitzwilliam, who, in this AU of ours is an exchange student, same with Mr. Willoughby

Willoughby is an exchange student for a year who got attached to Marianne, and then gradually stops replying to her letters after he left their school. Colonel Brandon is one of the school beneficiaries

One of the classes go for a trip to Lyme with Captain Wentworth as one of the guides and that's where Louisa smacks her head and later fellow poetry club member Benwick falls for her (or not! I'm also not comfortable with this pairing tbh.Louisa had a one-sided crush on Capt Wentworth)

I'm sorry this is sooooo long. My friend and O kept going at it from the side of the female characters only tbh and we didn't quite know where to put Darcy and Bingley. Are they students? Or older students visiting from Oxford? Horse riding enthusiasts and club members, sharing a hobby with Elizabeth? We don't know 😂

Hope you like it! It's not going anywhere because we are both not writers, but it's a good giggling source! :D

You should write this! The only thing that makes a "writer" is writing. Go for it. It sounds fun!

[cornishpadfoot]

Don’t mind if I do! For the ask game - 9 and 14

Don’t see any family related questions, so just spill the beans 👁️👁️

Thank you for the ask! [And I hope this hc tea isn't too abstract... and I really want to get back into drawing fanart... but for now I will use a screencap again.]

9. Who's your MC's favourite professor? What's their dynamic? Anyone they don't get along with? D. loves Professor BINNS! She really appreciates his realism about political (and micropolitical) nonsense among Britain's Wizarding elite. (His scavenger hunt class was also super fun; D. enjoys uncovering secrets about the castle and all of its amazing antiquities.) The Smith family have a long and controversial history of interacting with goblins, so D. is very interested in learning other witches and wizards' (learned and factual) perspectives on relations and conflicts with goblins.

(When Amit claimed to speak Gobbledygook, D. had to really try to not roll her eyes; and shift to the thought, alright, this will be interesting. And she is very interested in astronomy, something that was definitely not encouraged by her Smith family, so more than pleased to have an opportunity to reciprocate Amit's sharing his immense knowledge. On that note, D. also gets on with Professor SHAH; but is often doing other things at the same time as those extra nighttime observation sessions -- see response to 14. below.) D. has the most wariness about professors who seem suspicious of Professor FIG, whom she trusts and sees as a mentor invested in guiding and teaching her while also giving her space to mature and figure things out on her own. When D. finds out that some of the professors were or are Aurors, and especially when they start digging about FIG, she gets spooked. She gets her guard up about the possibility they start getting too curious about Ancient Magic and what D. is doing with it. Smiths trust who they trust and they don't like being told what to do.

Again, the Smith family operate a lot of the time on the margins and are subject to a fair bit of suspicion from others in the Wizarding (and non-Wizarding) community. The name Smith itself evokes, on the one hand, ubiquity and ordinariness (what are they hiding? Why won't D. tell anyone her unique forename?), but also connections to... Ancient power. Wayland the Smith, for example. And again, the Smiths are into working with goblins, and not just goblins, probably Muggles too, producing and accumulating wealth through means that others of Britain's Wizarding elite are uncomfortable with; partly because they not very knowledgeable in those areas. Mining, forging... engineering... at this time in history was an area where not just goblins but also Muggles from the country's peripheries were really making rapid progress (and D. also is really interested in Professor SHAH's sibling's becoming an astronomer working in the Muggle world). Smiths will be the first to remind you that badgers aren't into gardening, they are into digging and building (Herbology is definitely not D.'s favorite class, and wishes she could do Muggle Studies or Alchemy instead). 14. How does your MC feel about the fighting they're tossed into? Do they regret harming their enemies? Justify it? Relish it? D. ... loves... duelling. She was rather disappointed that the Crossed Wands meetings seemed to fold up by Christmas hols, or was it by Hallowe'en even? (Or, wait a second, did they just stop inviting D.?!)

When it comes to fighting, D. appreciates forms and rules and has scruples… though will not hold back if it's life or death. Which it seems to be a lot of the time. She accepts any opportunity to learn as much magic as she can and feels the responsibility to use the Ancient Magic that she has been entrusted with responsibly and judiciously. (In hindsight, it definitely wasn't a good idea to use Ancient Magic at the duelling club...)

And she wonders, why is transfiguring Beings into explosive barrels not Unforgivable?

[ener-chi]

Hello! Hope everything has been going well for you ☺️.

I've read some of your post on learning acupuncture and such, and I just wanted to ask: in your opinion would learning and practicing acupuncture on you on/yourself be safe and practical or would you recommend to others that they go to classes to learn.

I've always been a bit of a do it by yourself person but figured sticking yourself with needles even with references and such maybe I should ask someone I some what know who learning/ practicing it what they'd think 🤔.

Thank you for you time and have a good day!

Hi anon!

Thank you so much for asking! I'm so glad that you're interested in learning acupuncture - it's super cool!

I would highly recommend NOT learning acupuncture on your own, and highly recommend NOT practicing needling on yourself without supervision.

Practicing needling without proper training on technique and education is dangerous. If you don't understand what/where you're needling into, and haven't been taught how to needle parts of the body safely, you have a variety of risks, including:

Bruising, bleeding, hitting and causing lasting nerve damage, piercing arteries, and more serious risks like needling into organs and body cavities and potentially causing infection, puncturing and collapsing a lung, and even death.

It is very important that you receive proper training before needling yourself or other people, otherwise you could seriously hurt yourself or others.

And this even goes for people who have prior medical training in other fields, as well. This is a bit of a controversial topic - but there is something called Dry Needling. Basically, it is a technique that some biomedical practitioners (like physical therapists) will do where they will insert needles into muscles to help treat and relax them and to alleviate pain.

The reason that I say this is a controversial topic is because almost every single acupuncturist agrees that dry needling is dangerous. Why? Because they don't get adequate training. The people that practice dry needling are not acupuncturists, and usually will learn the techniques and get certified for dry needling in a weekend seminar or a short series of classes.

It's like I mentioned before - that is not enough nor proper training on technique or structures, and thus the risk of serious adverse events and injury is very high.

One of the most dangerous complications of acupuncture is called a pneumothorax, or a punctured/collapsed lung. This can be life-threatening, and requires an immediate trip to the hospital.

Here's a stat for you - the rate of a pneumothorax with dry needling is 3% of patients. And the rate with acupuncture? 0.001% of patients!!! (source and source)

That is a really big difference! And the reason is, of course, proper training and education.

In conclusion, please don't practice acupuncture on yourself without training and supervision (and also please don't get dry needling - see an acupuncturist instead).

That being said, you can still learn about and do things with Chinese Medicine without acupuncture needles. You can learn the points and do acupressure! Also there is something called Teishin and Enshin - this is a Japanese style that uses small metal toolsl that are used to stimulate and treat the points without actually puncturing the skin. It is extremely gentle, and can be as effective as acupuncture needles - there are practitioners who will just use Teishin and not use needles at all!

I am learning this, and it's wonderful. It's a great way to treat yourself, or people who don't want to do needles. I highly recommend the book A User's Guide to the Teishin and Enshin: A Quiet Revolution in Traditional East Asian Medicine by Bob Quinn (link). It's a wonderful book, and I've studied with him in person a few times now. And if you want a book that is a good primer/introduction into Chinese Medicine and the theory behind it, I recommend the book The Web That Has No Weaver by Ted Kaptchuk (link).

Thank you for the ask! And thank you for the well wishes, I have been doing great (:

Blessings!

[qcomicsy]

I have loved reading your comic live blogs and your opinions on characters. Do you have any comic runs that you would recommend for DC or Marvel?

Aw that's so sweet thank you! ♡

And yes I do have! Let's Dive.

Disclaimer: This list doesn't have a particular timeline nor is character driven. It's general runs I had a good time reading it or I find it particularly interesting.

DC

Batman and Associates

Serious Runs.

Prodigal

An old run I cannot recommend enough.

Prodigal is one of the runs entangled with Knightfall¹. It follows Bruce, after being seriously hurt by Bane, Dick and Tim trying to adapt to a new dynamic where Dick fills in as Batman for the first time and Tim works with him as his Robin.

It is interesting because it flips their dynamics for the first time in a long while and has a realistic take on how this affects their psychs but without getting much edgy or losing more light aspects comics used to have. Like the villain of the week and the back and forth where Batman characters thrive when written well.

It's good read if you:

Want to understand Dick Grayson's as character better.

Want to understand Dick's relationship with Bruce/Batman and Tim better.

Want to dive in on the relationship Dick has with the Batman mantle and how evolved over the years.

Like the more easy going aspects of the batfamily with getting too fannon.

Knightfall¹

Another old comic. I don't think you have to read Knightfell to understand prodigal. But I think it helps.

Knightfell is more an event than a comic run, but damn right is worth it.

All you need to know is that Bane hurts Bruce in a way he has to step back from being Batman for a long while, to a point that Bruce considers seriously stepping away from being the Batman all together, and passing the mantle down for other people. It explores how this affects Gotham City, Bruce's personal life and mental health, his loved one's lives and mental health and it has long term consequences in his comic book history.

It's a comic run that can be very overwhelming to read. There's a lot of comics related to it in different places so I'd recommend using a guide.

You don't have to read all of these comics to have the general idea of it. I didn't. Take your time.

It's a good read because:

In my personal opinion shows the exact moment where Bruce actually starts to break down to the character we have today. And this time without going back.

Shows how heroes work can take a tool not only on an emotional and mental aspect but also psychical.

Has a good balance between tragedy and hope that really ties in together. A rare thing in comics these days, respect the characters in their core. Even the ones you aren't supposed to like. Very. Very well written.

Jason's Robin Run.

A controversial comic run and comic era.

Jason's Robin Run is an interesting run, either loved or hated by people since 1983. And if you're a Jason fan I cannot recommend you enough.

The interesting aspect of Jason's Robin run is that the writing of it transcends time and even writers'intent. Where some of them didn't even like the idea of Robin. And yet wrote one of the best poetic ironies that DC Batman's could ever have.

At its worst the writing is classicists and pessimistic. And at it's best turning of your critical thinking is cozy and heart wrecking. It follows Jason's early days from the roots of his character until his downfall.

And I have an unpopular opinion of it.

Personally I think it's a good case study of how DC treats characters who come from lower class and abusive families. It also opens a discussion about how characters that aren't the perfect victim archetype are treated and written, Bruce's different attempts at raising his children and the influence of Mafia Movies from the 80's in western comics. I argue it's absolutely required reading to understand Jason Todd's character and how he works as a person even before the major trauma that changed his life forever.

It's good read if you:

Want to understand Jason's Robin better.

Want to understand Jason's character better.

Want to write Jason Todd, especially as a Robin.

Like Mafia centered stories and not much of large big bad villains.

Likes Bruce as a Good Dad. Or generally Likeable.

Robin War.

Good political commentary. Great Characters. Duke's introduction. Batfamily Shenanigans.

I will always recommend Robin War. It was recommended to me waaay back when I was starting to write the Batkids Podcast (bless you Gotham War anon!). And it's been an all time favorite to me since then.

Robin war is one of the few comics that approaches how Heroes could work as an icon that inspires change not only to individuals but also to social movements and how the youth tend to be on the front lines of change.

It's Duke's major introduction to Batman comics and the kid absolutely nails it. His relationship with Damian is adorable and interesting, so much they deserve more comics together. There are also good moments between the batfamily (Tim, Duke, Damian and Jason) and it tips their toes on how the Government tends to react to political movements from the people in an insightful way I was missing in the comics for a while.

It's a good read if you:

Like political commentary.

Want to understand Duke's character better.

Likes the Batfamily being silly and insufferable.

Want to Write Duke and Damian better.

Red Robin

So good everyone still misses more than ten years from now.

To be honest I don't recommend Red Robin if you're starting to read Tim character. I feel like a lot of people start with Red Robin gets frustrated with his character believe this is how Tim behaves in all times.

And this happens because... Tim is not like that. At least not normally. Red Robin exists after a major trauma that surrounds all the members of the batfamily and even more traumas that surround Tim's life. He had broken up with Steph, His best friend was Dead, Everyone thought Bruce was dead too.

Almost every role of the Batfamily changed at the time, Dick was Batman (not from his volution this time), Damian was Robin, Bruce wasn't there. So it's good to be aware that every character action in this comic will happen in reaction to that.

If you want to understand Tim or learn more about him as a character I recommend you Young Justice early runs or Robin (1993) mind you I am not well read on Tim's cannon.

Disclaimer off? Good because Red Robin is one of the funniest tragedies I ever read. And it's fucking amazing. It has everything. Action, Romantic Drama with Steph (a bit of bitter exes-kind-of-back-and-off-again-thing, Tim being a little shit that bullshits his way out of the most crazy situations he was putting in my himself or other enviroments, Drama, Angst. It's just... genuinely so good. Well written. Oh how we miss well written comics.

Also Tim's narration is so unabashedly funny I kind of wished he had an animated series of this comic except almost like fleabag style.

Fun and Easy reads.

📕 Harley Quinn 52. - One of the few good things to get off from 52. Also one of the first comics that explores Harley as a full fledged character with wants and dreams and aspirations. And the first comics to explore her bisexuality and friendship with Harley into the way we have today. Not all jokes land and honestly most of them aged pretty poorly so I'd read with a grain of salt.

📕 RHATO Rebirth¹. - It's an okay comic, good for a good time, but very hard if you like Bruce or rather him being a better father for Jason. It's a bit ooc, also Jason works too much with luck and plot armor. If you just want to read things without strings and like a more gentle Jason it might be the read for you.

Yet.

¹I don't recommend Red Hood and The Outlaws if you like Roy. Don't recommend if you want to understand Roy. Hell, Don't recommend it if you want to understand Jason.

If you want to understand Jason, write Jason and start to read (In a more serious way) his comics I recommend: Under the Red Hood + Red Hood: The Lost days.

📕 Harley Quinn Road Trip Special - Good if you like the Gotham sirens. Very easy read, unfortunately it's also written by a guy who has no idea how gal pal trips works but really really wants to and his reference was the kind of fantasy you find on AO3 at 3 am. Not much explicit though and I am pretty sure it doesn't pass the Bechdel test. But if you ignore the lack of understanding on how women and women friendships work you can have a good time.

Superman.

I love Superman he and I go way back, though I take easy reading his comics, my love for him comes from many places, and a couple of comics are there too.

Superman All Stars.

Beautiful. Beautiful comic. Changed the way I looked to life. Changed the way I used to see him. Changed the way I saw myself too.

I believe this is the kind of comic the less you know about it the more impact you. So it has no explanation here. Nothing other than it's like falling in love with him and meeting an old friend. Like late conversations on a sleep over. Like looking at Clark and Superman as a character with much deeper sight than people believe. Like seeing a side of him that you only get it if you're open to it.

"Like everything he ever represented and resonate with people. Like getting why he's so beloved. Like never coming back."

Marvel

Deadpool.

I'm going to talk about my wife.

This one is going to be divided by The Good (Comic Runs where I believe understand his character the most and have the best story arcs as well as interpretations and background cast) The nasty (Chaotic, so Chaotic) The dirty (No idea what the hell is happening, will make you laugh tough).

The Good

Comics that took his characterization more seriously and have a slightly more linear written stories.

Deadpool (1997)

Deadpool (2008)

Cable & Deadpool (A favorite by far by far) (2004).

Unfortunately recommended reading with a grain of salt it really really is a product of its time.

Deadpool vs Old Man Logan

This Wade tends to be more heartfelt and compelling, he's also ruthless. And way less likeable. The gags and jokes are more plot devices and aspects of his personality rather than his whole stick.

It also explores more heavy topics and if you're not in a good mental state I don't recommend Deadpool (2008). And works with his character from neutral point of view with a look into his morals and actions with way more depth and thought how that impacts himself and others.

The Nasty.

Comics generally after the movie where the joke matters more than the character, it's written by people who want to make him more likeable because his game flopped or had Ryan Reynolds voice in their head while writing it.

Deadpool vs. Hawkeye

Deadpool / Spider-Man.

The rise of living Deadpool.

He's kind of cute in some of this. It's nice for a good laugh. But background characters, characterization? All over the place. Sometimes I can't even look at it.

The Dirty.

Have no fucking idea why the hell would someone write this. This is not my blorbo much less my baby. I still care about him though. Flandarization from Flandarization. Will make you laugh though. Or at least, it's compelling.

Deadpool vs Carnage.