#still guilty about it 😭
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Idk if I'll ever share it cause like. Idk if I'd want to but god I love drawing Riku's lionsona. He's so fluffy and goofy and something about tlk style (well my take on it ig) that makes it easier to draw him with more fun expressions.
#oc tag#i feel like a lot of artists have one animal they love drawing and to absolutely NO ONES surprise mine is lions#id love to draw all of the prsona characters as lions someday#ive done some (you can probably guess) but they're kinda old#but yeah its a really fun art style to play around with and drawing lions is just#so much fun#lion riku is really fluffy too :3 fluffy fellow#my gf said he looked like simba's long lost uncle so do what you will with that information 😭#if i was REALLY feeling up to it id do one of those 'give me a character and ill draw them as a lion' challenges#THAT would be fun and id include ocs in that too#alas. requests and i dont go well together#i remember someone requested an outfit for one of those outfit memes last year for riku and i finished it#and i never posted it 🚶 it was fucking fire too i still love that drawing#still guilty about it 😭#there is no lore behind him having a lion form btw i just really wanted to draw him as a lion in tlk style
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there's just something about reyna being so desperate for a romantic connection after venus tells her that she'll never be loved by a demigod. when she was even willing to date octavian, when she immediately latched on to percy after he arrived at camp, and then, of course, her unrequited feelings for jason.
this is partly why I dislike people blaming jason for "leading her on" because there's absolutely no canon evidence to suggest that reyna was vocal or obvious about her feelings to jason or ever made a move about it. especially considering the venus incident where reyna had begun to avoid him. it would've ironically given jason the opposite impression. it's only mentioned that they shared something special, which could just as easily allude about their close friendship. jason said that he never felt anything romantic towards reyna, they were both pretty restricted when it came to love because they had an image to withhold at camp, they also had this external pressure of being the potential picture perfect couple. he liked sharing roman history knowledge with her as a best friend, they wanted to visit cool historical monuments together, which he appreciated, and he trusted her deeply, but that was all there ever was to it. their connection was dominated by sweet platonicity, in his perspective, atleast.
reyna misinterpreting jason's behaviour as something romantic also makes sense to her character because she wanted to be loved that way. it was reyna's wishful thinking that caused her inevitable heartache and that adds nuance to her character.
reyna had her own faults in the downfall of jason and her's friendship, just like jason did. and that makes them good characters. they both refused to reach out bc of hesitation and it isnt just jason's fault as the fandom claims it to be.
when jason said reyna distanced herself from him and was never quite the same around him after the venus incident?? do people not understand that jason's hesitation to reach out must have stemmed from that?? worried that she'll distance herself again?? or when reyna greeted piper in boo and didn't even take a glance at jason? reyna had too much pain inside of her so she couldn't reach out. and that's okay.
they never ended up clearing the air because of this lingering hesitation, causing reyna to have everlasting guilt after he passed. and that is also okay. they were just kids who cared about eachother but didn't know better.
their relationship is way more complicated and heartbreaking and reducing it to "jason lead her on and broke her heart, he's the real red flag" does injustice to BOTH their characters.
#i hate it when y'all target jason for everything#he felt guilty about reyna. even though he was not obligated to return her feelings. he had empathy and was not as cold as y'all made him#also when ppl mary sue-fy every character like pls 😭 this happens in the fandom w nico percy and hazel too it's so frustrating#yall wil complain about mary sues in literature but still strip the characters off of any existing flaw they have#pjo#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo series#pjo hoo#jason grace#pjo hoo toa#hoo fandom#hoo#heroes of olympus#heros of olympus#rrverse#reyna ramirez arellano#reyna avila ramirez arellano
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X-Men Red: Magneto's last words and Charles in mourning.
Important additions from Resurrection of Magneto:
#xmen#Krakoa#cherik#x men red#resurrection of magneto#magneto#professor x#charles xavier#storm#ororo munroe#erik lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#ngl i see why ppl have been pushing to call him max now but i still like erik more as a name 😭#feel guilty like im deadnaming him when i call him Erik now#conflicted about it#also charles looks so freaking pretty in resurrection of Magneto theres another panel with his full face and man is gorg
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Remember George's outline notes that had "joy of giving" and "mercy at the gate" for Arya? Mercy is crossed out and we obviously have that as her sample chapter, so what if Arya's next alias is "Joy"? Over-thinking the significance of that phrase and how it could apply to the rest of her Braavos arc🤔
#arya stark#asoiaf#something something /joy of giving/ could align with /all men must serve/ and Arya's apprenticeship with the courtesans#Arya learns more about courtly manners and becomes more comfortable with engaging in highborn spaces#while becoming more privy to Braavosi politics and how that connects to her responsibilities/identity as a Stark#when I imagine Arya reclaiming her identity I imagine it coming with her acceptance of even the /hard/ parts of her identity#I think Ned's words about /summer games/ and growing up will be incredibly relevant to her here#her reclaiming her identity while ignoring the /Lady/ aspect of it makes no sense...especially considering how often we're reminded of it#literally every time she reveals her identity it comes with people acknowledging her highborn status#one thing that makes me wish we had on-page Cat/Arya interactions cause I think her twow arc will be heavy on remembering Ned's words 😭#imagine her reuniting with Jeyne before she knows Bran+Rickon are alive and deciding to reclaim her identity at the unmasking festival#I have a pet theory that she could end up /taking responsibility/ for Jeyne's marriage to Ramsay in order to offer some protection to Jeyne#I think it fits considering she has a very protective nature and could feel guilty since she had the opportunity to reveal herself to Roose#basically I want the reclamation of her identity to be incredibly personal and about her feelings + values#which is why I like to imagine it happening before she's aware rickon+bran are alive but after she gets news that Jon is dead#I want her motivation to return home to be primarily about her internal development while outside factors are supporting#/need/ Arya exploring and accepting her identity in her own way#deciding to be Arya while her family is lost to her and that identity is connected to an unwanted marriage would feel so significant#(and yes it was Jeyne that was married to Ramsay but it was Arya's name used and it's still (partially) about/will impact her)#anyways I think about Arya's Braavosi arc a normal about can you tell? 😀#one day I won't put the majority of my post in the tags but today is not that day#I definitely thought too hard about this though that's why I have to hide it lol
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Had fun one night and doodled an entire page in a comic format 'cus I can. ...And then forgot about it for almost a month. Finally I was able to finish it hehe Panels aren't linked by plot, consider this a stylised sketch dump/AU comic style test (I'm not planning to make a comic, just wanted to draw out some ideas I had for a long time). What I can tell for certain is that first two panels are related to the Sculptor Also, I FINALLY finished listening to TMA! After five years. On a third try. Only thing I regret is me spoilering a bunch of cool stuff three or so years ago and menaging to remember it up to season 5... At least I was only partially crashed by the finale :D This podcast means the world to me, truly. Having full context to everything is amazing and I love Martin with all my heart. Also two particular Martin-centric episodes from season 5 were very cathartic and made me feel uncomfortably seen in a way I didn't even knew I needed- (If you know you know which ones I'm talking about 😭)
#i'm reeealy bummed out about spoiling the tapes IT IS ONE OF THE BEST TWISTS 😭#i had first hand experience with first 4 seasons + ~ 7 ep from season 5 when creating this au btw#and i knew that “avatars” and such were pretty much nominal concepts - i just decided to keep them a bit more prominent in au#for an extra flavour so to speak#often i feel very guilty because of it...#but i thought about it for quite some time and realised something#this au is really just for fun and isn't meant to represent lore of tma/wof/my own main story completely accurately#i love the podcast dearly and base a lot of stuff in this au on smaller things in lore - still i really should stop worrying about accuracy#sometimes i do stuff contrary even to my own interpretation ✨for vibes✨ (or shits and giggles even lol)#in conclusion: don't take it too seriously (i surely don't)#only things i'm *kinda* serious about are character arcs and drama and even that isn't the case all of the time#my art#another chance au#dragon#artists on tumblr#horror au#wings of fire#wof au#the magnus archives#tma oc#wof oc#doodle#comics#Irbis#Newt#Stargazer#Fish#Sculptor
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I hate when you're scrolling tumblr and accidentally follow someone, so you have to do the clickthrough of shame to their blog to unfollow them. Like "I am so sorry I’m only here to unfollow you. Your blog looks lovely. I love what your did with the color scheme."
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controversial show
dunno why I was so nervous about saying it for so long, this is tumblr
a couple months ago, I rewatched vampire knight after so many years. I'm usually uncomfortable with those kinds of topics, but this media holds a lot of memories and feelings for me. will read the manga at some point
#rou rambles#literally can't look at a comment section without people fighting about it 😭😭#the music is peak and that's the only thing people can agree on#listening to the soundtrack again and ascending#it's my guilty pleasure probably#a dead fandom... or so I thought. there are still people talking about it#will I get canceled for talking about it? hopefully not
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Man, I still remember participating in one of the many jjba zines that I took part in and how my piece was placed as the first page (for the second time) and how one of my mutuals/artists that I’ve always admired, hit me with the “oh… you’re on the front page again… 😅…” like man, that kind of killed me lmfao. I never got over it like man, what was that about.
#it’s not like i put the books together myself or anything all my ass did was submit my work#like this was from a really popular and well known artist as well like#their art has always been so gorgeous to me too I was like ‘I’m literally a nobody is this person really being shady or…’#rambling#I guess it’s nice being in a zine with ppl I don’t know or care to get to know at least now 😭… just submitting my art and running#referring to the jjk zine 😭 I need t start working on it uhh#zines make me feel so anxious man#it really did make me feel bad and almost guilty? I was like this is kind of awkward…#another zine I was in which was run by a mutual… well… I never even got my zine in the mail#and I even sent them $20 for some merch that they were making since I wanted to support and never got that either…#they deleted their blog but I see that they remade and draw a lot of DM and have a lot of popular posts here so it’s kind of awkward seeing#their art shared on the dash sometimes skeks#we’re still mutuals on Twitter but I don’t rly want to ask about my zine again or the $20 bucks#it’s okay like I owe other ppl stuff too I’m a late bird man but still loskekk#they were the mod for the zine too#I might hit them up again I guess I still love their art and they were always fun to talk to#there was another zine that I participated in where we had to purchase our own copy bro#i remember being so annoyed by that but went ahead and bought it anyway#I was invited to this zine so it made me even more annoyed#I#Guess it didn’t make its money back#or something like that but I remember being broke at the time and was pissed that I had to pay for my own book#I didn’t buy any of the merch because why when it was supposed to be free#if you’re participating in a zine the book and merch should be free
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thinking about this post i saw the other week where this person was saying how badly they wanted to be able to buy a nice mug without thinking twice about it. and all the comments were saying how they could just buy a cheaper mug. and they were like jesus fucking christ ITS NOT ABOUT THE MUG. because yeah
#i’m so fucking. Exhausted#having to so carefully budget every single dollar#and feeling like a failure if i want to get like. some fancy cookies or something#or a nice blanket#and i am paying back my debt but also taking on more every year#and i personally don’t even feel that bad about it. like as long as i can afford the monthly payments idc#but then i see like three million tiktok/youtube videos shaming people who have less debt than i do#and im like. well ok.#like i am Trying idk what else to say😭#but i don’t want to try this hard like i’m not strong enough#i don’t have the work ethic or desire to scrape every penny into my savings like.#i just want to be able to buy fun things and see my friends#not even like. anything crazy expensive😭#i want to go out to a bar for karaoke without feeling guilty about the drink prices#it’s just. sooooo fucking frustrating and i’m worried it won’t ever end#sorry for the rant i am just spiraling a little bit😭#i’ll probably delete later#like i am Fine and actually doing really well rn#but i am so sick of not being able to afford to eat#and even when i start getting paid i still have to be so so so careful with my money#which i am. historically not good at doing#UGH#sorry😭#will delete#personal
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Yet again hindered by the "this reply is hidden because you have the user blocked" message. It has me Almost wondering whether I'd be better off not blocking so many people. So that I can freely be a nosy bitch.
Almost, but not quite. My block list is for my sanity, after all.
#speculation nation#though sometimes i do wonder about whether all the ppl i have blocked Should be blocked.#they all get shoved into the same list but it's not like tumblr lets me record why i blocked them.#sometimes it's as inane as 'annoyed me too much with that one take in the tags'. and sometimes it's like. genuine bigotry lol#there r definitely plenty of users id like to keep blocked. but i wonder if there r any blogs that like. dont Really deserve to be blocked?#but to go thru my list of blocked users would require taking psychic damage in my attempts to judge Why i blocked them all.#sometimes i do wonder if random ppl in the fandom try to go on my blog but cant bc i have them blocked for stupid shit#bc i do have a semi-popular fanfiction!!! a well love fanfiction!!! what if someone reads it then finds out theyre blocked on here!!!#frankly id be mortified if i discovered that lol. like 'what did i even do????'#and well there are some things i dont budge on (like blocking anyone that puts k/v in front of me)#(it's an immediate block bc even tho i have the tags blocked i still hate even seeing mention of them in a blocked post#so i block anyone who posts it into the tag so theres no chance of seeing it from them again! simple solution.)#but. for the things that r just stupid reasons. i feel kinda guilty. like im sorry. im just a little block-happy in the tags 😭#it's how ive stayed sane tag diving daily for the past 4+ years. you must understand.#im probably overthinking this lol. but if ur blocked by me & dont know why then uhhh. sorry !
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It’s too bad that some people have to ruin a nice thing. Louis is going to places that really don’t get a lot of big concerts. He’s going out of his way to reach these places and probably isn’t making a whole lot of money, and in return some people are being so gross. We all know that there are the stalker crew that follow the tour and fight local fans to get to the barricades, so odds are high they’re part of the problem we’re seeing now. I wouldn’t blame him if for the next leg there is no more barricade run.
While I'm aware that most people aren't as chronically online and tracking Louis' every mood and movement as I am, at this point even a mild engagement with the fandom in the runup to your show- which I feel like its safe to assume anyone putting in the time to get on barricade has- is enough to let you know that at this time he is not enjoying people tugging at his clothes and it is not the moment! I think there are the privileged foreign fans following him around who carry that sense of privilege into their actions on barricade, I think there are probably local fans who are just wildly excited about their one show and getting a little crazed in the moment (or just being jerks) as well- personally I wish that instead of having it be an all or nothing thing that Louis would just do it when he's feeling it and having fun and it feels fun and silly to let people tug at him, and simply take the day off when he is, for example, sick and struggling through a lot of back to back shows, the same as he lets the songs that are harder at certain times be taken off the set list as needed and only does the stage door fan time when he feels up for it
#tbh I think part of the problem is that he is still doing barricade partially to distract from the fact that he's struggling#or because he feels guilty for the shows not being 100%#I watched the afhf doc last night and the whole thing is just him being SO STRESSED about doing good enough its actually painful to watch#and I just kept thinking about how stressed he must be right now about his perceived failure to give 110% at every show#when most people won't have noticed a damn thing!! as for example the people on barricade#who are just fully oblivious#I bet he's scared too about losing vocal capability long term😭I wish I could send him all the hugs (from SOMEONE ELSE not me that's scary)#blah blah blah
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I dont know what this should say i justwanna post about flavio. flavio
#im like runningout of captions for posts where i wanna talk in the tags ya know#anyways uhmmm what did i do today#i ate lasagna#im lowkey getting a headache#was supposed to work on something but i watched youtube instead oops#thought about Pmtok again. i love pmtok#im still walking back and forth thinking about comming flavio plushie im too scared to do it#i know ill feel guilty after paying#but fuuuuuk i want one So bad AUGHHH#😭#anyways ummmmrmrmrm Maybe ill finish a wip tonight#idk#really boring day
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teehee i now have a very very wonderful photo
#me leaning and slightly sleeping on the guy i like#🤭🤭#for those who follow my lore closely (so i think only milo) this isn't the cute guy in history whom i have never spoken to#this is the now pretty close friend in my school friendgroup who i had a big crush on for a few months#i became less obsessed with him but that was definitely a good thing i think crushes get unhealthy when they're too strong#and i still think he's cute obviously i mean i liked him for looks alone the first couple weeks#anyway today at this party i was sitting next to him and ended up sleeping next to him three times in succession#i mean kind of sleeping looking back i probably did doze off at points but it was kindaaa fake sleep#first time i edged toward his shoulder but didn't fully have my head resting against it#then i ducked my head up and said i wasn't asleep just resting and we laughed a little#i think he said he wanted to draw on my face avjddhbd#anyway second time my head inched toward his shoulder and was fully on there teehee#then when i ducked my head back up he was like awwe its okay and kinda tucked my head back against his shoulder#i was GEEKING bro 😭😭 i opened my eyes those three times when people questioned my sleepiness bc i could not keep a straight face#i was fighting to contain a grin the whole time#uuughh and he was saying how he didn't want to move and was getting people to pass him things abdjbdhd#he could have kicked me off but he didn't!! that's so cute#i was hoping someone would get a photo and a couple people did and they're so cute#gawwddd idk if now is the right time for anything but i really like him i enjoy his presence immensely#he's so nice he's not absolutely perfect of course but he's such a sweet guy#im thinking of that one tumblr relationship advice post about how the ancients didn't stumble across fully built temples#they found a flat place with good grass and water nearby they found a good place to build and then built#if there's any chance of things happening between us iiii think it's a good place to build#literally my only personal downsides for him are such minor things that could definitely change with age and maturing#it's just a lack of motivation or passion toward things and sometimes a bit of a lack of consideration#but i know im guilty of that too and he really is so nice he never acts maliciously#never at all augh he's so sweet
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i keep saying i need to make some zhaoryu shit but i'm back on my y5 kazusaeji bullshit again they are just so. m
#ada speaks#there NEEDS to be more zhaoryu shit. but kazusaeji still holds my ass hostage so#if i am to write a comprehensive timeline of kiryu's sexuality and him coming to realizations about himself that lead to the way he's#changed in gaiden to be more. uh.#then i have got to start at 5 because its literally when he first begins to realize he's fr into men. and then gaiden & 8 he's like Out#i need his first time to be with saejima when he's at his lowest it just makes sense#theres so fucking much in 5 that feels like its really coming to a head#mayumi. why did they fucking do that. like also nakajima and his coworkers being like U Are Gay but.#mayumi. and hinata. why are you having him refuse sex with women TWICE in one game#i hc him as acespec but i also think he should get to fool around w saejima for narrative reasons#and by that i mean i think it would be absolutely devastating and tragic and also they would both legitimately be so normal about it#saejima knows he's going back to jail anyway so there's that#but god help kiryu he's absolutely trying to fill the loneliness void with People all the damn time#lowkey doing what he did with kaoru to saejima 😭#you're grieving the loss of your family? time to latch onto the woman going through the same thing just a year later#lost your emotional support daughter? allow a woman to live with you while you continuously rebuff her advances#lonely and directionless and feeling guilty for having dragged your loved ones into conflict again and again?#have sex with probably the Only guy who can understand exactly what you're going through but is consistently in a Way healthier mindset#it also makes the conversation they have on the rooftop of new serena so much more deranged if it happened before that#im normal btw thanks for asking
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proud curly defender literally what was he supposed to do. its sad that he couldnt do anything but in no way is that his fault!!? theyre in the middle of space, his friend will 100% lash out if he confronted him in a more severe way than he did (he reacted to "lets figure this out together" with talking abour how theyll be remembered as a tragedy (crashing the ship)), and he couldnt lock him anywhere because theres like 3 locked places on the ship which are the cockpit (where he would crash the ship, and lock the captain out by putting him there), the medical room (all the medical supplies are in there!!) and the like storage room thing (they didnt want to and did not dare to open that until way after the crash.) . the only thing he could have done was kill jimmy, which would not only be kind of hard to shoot anyone period but youd have repercussions for when you get back. also then youd just have a dead body on the ship whicy they probably have no means of isolating/disposing of for the next like what 8 months? pleasw tell me what youd do in this situation if you blame him more than you blame jimmy
ALSO HE WAS GIVEN 2 DAYS TO PROCESS TBIS AND THINK OF A WAY TO FIX IT. THATS NOT ENOUGH TIME TO DO TJAT!! especially when tne answer to fixing it is nothing until they land back on earth at least
#the only way he could possibly be blamed is for like.the fact he got jimmy the job and befriended him he literally did nothing 😭#as in#he did nothing wrong. there was 0 result i can see where nobody dies or has the rest of the crew in sort of like#danger? just like. a very unpleasant event? dead body n all that. cant just throw his body overboard because. thats probably illegal#anyways!!!there was literally notjing he could do tjst i can see at least. no him being disabled is not “punishment” for not helping anya#when he LITERALLT COULS NOT. DO ANYTJING#the only difference is before he couldnt do anytjing for environmental purposes and now he cant for like.physically cannot reasons#i feel like mostly people on tiktok say this kind of stuff (curly guilty/just as bad as jimmy!) but im still mad about it#he did try to confront him and everyone died.the only best case scenario here is that like. he never got on the ship to begin with
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i love you mucky my darling u rock
I'M ROCK!!!! 🪨
#LOVES YOU TOO‼️#loves you forever even when your depression makes you sad for no reason#that's happens to me too and it sucks so bad and sometimes i end up feeling even more sad about it#cause i know i don't actually have anything to be upset about (despite the fact i have the sad about nothing illness fkhsksjs😭)#but you gotta remember everyone feel sad for no reason sometimes even if depression makes it happen extra bad and extra often#gotta be like oouhhvbgh this too shall pass and not feel guilty or ashamed cause you're doing the best you can and everyone still love you#askmuck
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