#spoonie things to do

[the-jesus-pill]

You’ve got to forgive yourself for being traumatized and needing to learn how to function again. 

Recovery isn’t always nightmares and depression, it’s forgetting to eat, being scared of what others might see as completely normal things, it’s getting random panic attacks, not knowing how to take care of yourself, not knowing how to live like an adult, even if you’re twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, of feeling like you’re failing to function in a world where everyone seems to have their shit together. 

If you need help, ask for it. Go to forums and ask for advice. Take advantage of community resources. Buy pre-sliced veggies and fruits, eat instant meals if you can’t cook for yourself today. Hire someone. Ask a neighbor for a favor. Buy any item you think might make life easier, even if you feel like you aren’t ‘disabled’ enough to have it. 

Some of the depression posts (ie open your windows, take a shower, go outside, call a friend) are really helpful but they’re not always enough. I’ve found advice for spoonies, people with chronic pain or other disabilities have the best tips because they know what it’s like to be bedridden, out of energy, stuck in a brain fog. 

You may never return back to the energy you had when you were younger and you might always need to use crutches to help you through life. It’s the same with medication. 

Trauma is a real thing that happens to you, it physically alters your brain and it’s alright to have lasting scars. 

You’re not broken, your life is not over and you can still be happy. 

It’s not your fault.

[alxor-of-hellsite]

Just because you can stand up, doesn’t mean you should. If standing up right now will make everything worse & what you need to do is rest, then rest.

[seraphsfire]

any other spoonies or people with fibro/chronic fatigue/myalgic encephalomyletis/adhd/etc start just *trying* to think of the steps to a complex mental task have an immediate brain shutdown and get sleepy/fatigued/feel drugg/ed and physically exhausted immediately after doing so bc i feel like im going crazy and googling/duckduckgo-ing yeilded only like, mayo clinic articles defining chronic fatigue so. lol

[heatherwitch]

I’ve been in a flareup all week and mudane efforts have barely helped so spells and sigils it is.

Migraine relief

Ease my neck pain

My back is relaxed and free of pain

My headache goes away

My pain is manageable

My muscles are relaxed

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

”why don’t you ever post about x?” i literally cannot remember it. “but it’s important!” yeah but that doesn’t stop me from being disabled. i really Am trying to spread awareness about important topics when i remember they exist but when i'm waking up confused to where i am what’s going on or if i'm even real my brain is Also going to forget about Other important things

[tofu-bento-box]

being chronically ill is like having footnotes on your existence

[serana666]

The lupus is severe today but I decided to do cute makeup to combat the despair. feeling very lesbian 💖🤍🧡

[truly-a-snitch]

you don't need crutches retard you're just gross and out of shape

sure man

[youngchronicpain]

me: *can't remember things because pain and meds and neurological issues*

person: how could you forget this thing!!! it was Important!!!!

me: I really do not think you understand :) that I do not get a choice in what I do and do not remember

[sprout-senior]

ever so slightly embarrassing pro tip:

eating is literally so much easier when you make imaginary friends who worry about you and encourage you to take care of yourself

[an-organized-confusion]

Brain just threw at me a possible crack art/fic idea of an Intrulogical fusion (current fandom) and Dr. Insano (first fandom I made shit for) meeting eachother. They'd definitely be pulling that Spiderman meme. :I

[hellyeahsickaf]

I guess I just thought I'd have more time to be able to live something of a "normal" life, feel like something of a person. I didn't have to think much about doing things and ration out my energy. I sort of wish I'd been able to do more with that time or at least appreciate it more. You don't think it'll be you if you weren't born severely disabled. You probably can't imagine what that's like but also you don't think to because that will never be you. Or if it could, maybe it would be when you're super old

I miss the feeling of sand or gravel under my shoes when I'd walk around the beach or the marsh or something. When the sun didn't feel so harsh and blinding and the rain didn't mean a flare up, it meant I could spend the day making soup and maybe go get a warm drink and a pastry at the cafe I like. They knew me by name because I went there all the time. They probably think I moved away or something happened to me

[walking-loather]

When it comes to hygiene tasks and self care with disability and chronic illness, its pretty much a constant case of: don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.

Basically: it's better to do something, than to do nothing at all.

TLDR: Just because you can't do something "properly" doesn't mean you shouldn't do it at all. Do it half-way. Do it shitty. Do it barely. Do it on a technicality. But do what you can. Just try, because doing something will help you.

If you don't have the energy to scrub your body with a sponge, just rub soap over your skin with your hands.

If you don't have the energy to wash your whole body with soap, just hit the places where sweat accumulates, or where you're smelliest.

If you don't have the energy to wash with soap AT ALL, just sitting in water is better than nothing. It will wash away dirt and oils.

If you can't bathe or shower at all, a warm wash cloth is your new best friend. If that's too much, then try bath wipes. They're a bit bigger than regular wet wipes, and a bit more heavy duty. They're designed to help keep bed ridden patients clean in hospitals.

If you don't have the energy to dry yourself after a bath or a shower, just put on a bathrobe and get into bed. If you don't have the energy to get dressed afterwards, just don't. It can wait until you can.

If you don't have energy to brush your teeth for two minutes, honestly, just a cursory scrub is better than not doing anything.

If you can't brush your teeth twice a day, brush in the evenings. It will help take away the build up of food from the day.

If you don't have the energy to brush AT ALL, honestly, just take a cloth and wipe the plaque off your teeth. Rinse with mouth wash after if you'd like. Something is always better than nothing.

If you can't floss twice a day. Try once. If that's too much, try a few times a week. If that's too much, try setting aside a day once a week as a goal. If you can't keep a schedule, do it when you're able to. Hell, I keep some floss next to my bed so that if I forget and don't have the energy to go get it, I can just reach over.

If you can't iron your clothes, don't bother. Wrinkles are fine. Wear jumpers over wrinkly t-shirts. No one will know, and honestly, most people won't even care. If it's really wrinkly and it's A Big Deal And It Needs To Be Ironed, here's my life hack. Step 1: take a spray bottle, and spritz the item of clothing (while you're wearing it is easiest) until it's lightly damp. Step 2: use a hair-dryer on the clothes until they're dry. It gets rid of creases like nobody's business, it's easier than lugging out the iron and ironing board, and you get to have nice toasty warm clothes afterwards.

If you can't fold your clothes, try just hanging them up. It's less commitment. It's quicker to do. Granted, you need to have the space in order to do this, but it is also good at helping you downsize, and lets you visualise exactly what you have.

If you can't put your clothes away, invest in a couple of laundry baskets, and then just keep your clean clothes in the baskets. You can then separate washed clothes into underwear, pants, and shirts baskets. You can just leave them like that. I'm giving you permission to never fold your laundry again if you can't. Just leave it unfolded. Who's going to care? Something is better than nothing. If you can, try to put those baskets into your closet so that you can keep the clutter out of sight, and give yourself a more restful environment.

If you can't separate your clothing out into different categories and wash them "properly" (whites, warm tones, cool tones, darks, delicates / switching between hot & cold washes / paying attention to laundry instructions on the label) then just don't worry about it. If you cold wash your clothes, colours won't bleed. Maybe gradually over the course of dozens of washes there'll be some changes in hue, but it's really not as high stakes as the One Red Sock In The Whites Turns Them Pink trope makes it out to be.

I've pretty much come to the point in my life where if a piece of clothing can't survive the washer and dryer, then it's just not meant to be. I colour separate my clothes, and if I have the energy/remember I'll take my bras and jumpers out of the washing machine to drip dry. But otherwise, I leave it to the universe.

If you can't separate out your recycling, then don't. If you have a large amount of rubbish you need to get rid of but the idea of separating it out properly is stopping you from doing so, then just don't worry about it. I know it's not ideal, but if you have garbage in your room/house and you need to get rid of it, please just get rid of it. Don't let the problem get bigger and harder to deal with. Don't let "doing something properly" get in the way of keeping your living spaces clean. Please. Give yourself understanding.

If you can't wash your dishes, get paper plates. Obviously, it's not ideal, but it is better that you eat food than skipping meals. It is better that you have a clean kitchen, rather than having dishes piling up and making it harder to look after yourself.

If you can't prepare meals for yourself keep making the tasks easier and easier. If you can't do recipes, then simplify. Use pasta sauce from the jar instead of making it. Eat canned soup. Buy food you can just stick in the oven. If you eat fish fingers and microwave veggies every night, it's better than not eating anything at all. It's better than having to fork out money on take-out. If you need ready-made meals, then get them. If you're literally just eating a raw cauliflower for dinner; 1) I see you, 2) me too, sis, 3) something is better than nothing.

These are the basic things you need to do every day to function as a person. They are your activities of daily living. Brushing your teeth. Bathing or showering. Using the bathroom. Getting dressed. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. Keeping your environment clean. You don't need to do these things perfectly, but they need to happen in order for you to have a decent quality of life.

And it breaks my heart, because I know that so many disabled people can't do these things every day. I'm not saying this to guilt or judge, I'm saying that these are basic needs; you deserve these things. These things bring dignity. If a disabled person is unable to do these things, it diminishes their quality of life. It robs them of dignity.

If you need help to do these things, Its okay to ask for help. It's okay to need help. But if you can't get that help and you have to do these things by yourself -- or you just plain want to be independent and do it without help-- then don't hold yourself to standards you can't meet.

Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good. Doing something is always better than doing nothing. Even if it's not perfect. Even if it's not done well. Do what you can.

[pussysidon]

When you realize that no matter how much you want to do something and no matter how hard you try to do it you still won't be able to because of your disability

[opalsiren]

a fun thing that has happened to me in recent months is that i feel like i can't go outside by myself anymore. like i'll be out and suddenly feel like i'm going to pass out from pain and fatigue, and if i'm not alone i'll pass my phone to someone and get them to orchestrate a taxi home for me. but then if i'm on my own i won't have anyone to sort a taxi for me, and the fatigue and brain fog and overall cognitive impairments will be so disabling in that moment it's hard to do anything. not to mention if i can't find anywhere to sit while i wait for a taxi it's even more frightening, plus sometimes it takes over half an hour to get a taxi even at off-peak times in areas that really shouldn't be that busy. lol. lmao, even.

[x22817]

waiting in the waiting room...bored