#sorry im shaking rn
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Guys I made a wings of fire x Yu-Gi-Oh Duel Monsters crossover I think I've crossed the line
#im sick to my stomach thinking about it too#this anime is rakinf over my like#*taking#*life#sorry im shaking rn#crossoverau
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SILVER BLAZE PART THREE - happy jonkday everyone. one of these days i'll draw a scene that doesn't take place at night
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#love when they quote acd holmes#a couple notes: i think i probably made sherlock more excitable than he actually is in this scene#its my opinion that he smiles more than we're giving him credit for but mostly i just needed to make the comic dynamic#and the thought of sherlock excitedly shaking watson was rly funny so. i did that. creative freedom#2. love that u can hear him stimming here i love him so muchhhh#3. the implication that sherlock sat and watched 6 hours. SIX HOURS of totally silent footage#and thought to himself 'hm...that was a bit quiet. TOO quiet...better wake my podcaster'#SENDS me#4. what on earth happens after this scene. does he just leave without elaborating.#anyway theyre fun to draw so thats overriding my sense that im being really annoying rn#im sooo sorry ;0;#5. yeah john has it all. freckles. stretch makes. body hair. scars. mwah#patsart
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We should definitely talk about this art
Credits to @ pynpycpyn (whoa I didn't realize it was fanart)

#my sakuatsusuna ass is shaking rn#im not even joking#i feel kinda sorry for oikawa#i mean who the fuck would want to deal with sakusa rintarou and atsumu all at once#(me)#sakuatsu#atsusuna#sakuatsusuna#sakusa kiyoomi#suna rintarou#miya atsumu#oikawa tooru#hq timeskip#hq#haikyuu
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hiiiiii. i made a fan kid. her name's clay
#*shaking rn*#pine art#woud#clay strife#<- her tag#um. yay anyway. she. sorry im very nervous sharing. hyping myself up rn. thank u bubby btw#i have some other art of her too. and a lot of thoughts. perhaps another time#ffvii oc
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With every fic read I stray further and further from God.
#sorry i read a radioapple fic and im in a Mood now#yes i can use proper capitalization and punctuation. only when i want to.#gods shaking his head disapprovingly at me rn#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fic#hazbin hotel memes#alastor#lucifer morningstar#radioapple#radioapple fic#debs is a yapper#debs is an original poster
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CINDERELLAS CASLE STAGE SAVE ME





#sorry for the quality lmao anyway but it’s there#im shaking rn it’s so beautiful#starkid#cinderella’s castle
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I see people (mostly on pinterest) saying "Ohhh but what could curly do, they were all trapped in space!" But people never pay attention to that anya is allowed to feel. Anya is allowed to be distraught and enraged. It doesn't matter curly couldn't do anything (or at least you think he couldn't), she's allowed to feel whatever she needs to, because she was assaulted. Doesn't matter what could or couldn't have been done, you're ignoring the point entirely.
#this og comes from a comment on a pinterest post so it might not make a whole lotta sense sorry#tw for assault and implications and whatnot#maybe biased because anya headmate#but oh my lorddd#i get so mad#i get so so so mad#jesus#im quite literally shaking rn#pacing shaking head aching#feel like eminittle rn im spitting barss /silly /j#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing#anya mw
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Honestly even if Buck doesn't get back together with Tommy (ack) he will end up with a guy. Maybe a couple of girls in between but his last will be a guy. TV shows don't want to get accused of straight washing a character. They are terrified of what we will do to them.
oh... oh no. Um, no. Thats. No.
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waow
#before anything else i must warn this is going to be. unorganized thoughts mostly#in the last year or so ive tried to regain confidence that i am in fact plural and am not just faking it#or mistaking other symptoms for DID. shake off the denial y'know. as is so signature for this damn disorder#a diagnosis probably wouldnt even make me feel more sure lol. and also getting diagnosed for this specifically is like#the final boss of psychiatry to put it lightly lol#but when it quiets down in headspace ur always gonna feel like. maybe its over. whatever that was#it was just me and brandy for a while#but guess who had a godawful night and then a godawful morning and split a new alter ‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥#he hates it here! he might hate me for creating him! im not sure !#hell im not even rly sure if im juno or brandy rn lol. my mind is just so messy today#i woke up.. when did i wake up. like 9:30 i think and its 1pm now and i haven't gotten out of bed#i don't even remember all that time passing . i couldve sworn its only been like an hour. two at most#on the one hand this has all been kinda terrible and mentally exhausting but at the same time. hey cant say im faking now LMAO#the other hand is brandy. the other hand is absolutely brandy. i am tired lol#im only posting this here so i can just like. process it i guess#ive had a weird time finding an outlet to just spew random thoughts into since leaving twitter so. sorry#idk if anyone's expecting this of me but i always kinda feel like i need some level of professionalism on this account#keyword some. i know this is tumblr#but idk if these very open posts are. annoying? weird? uncomfortable? entertaining somehow?#i know I know theres no point in worrying abt how others percieve you . knowing that hasnt stopped me from doing it lol#i dont remember where i was going w this. maybe i didnt have a goal in the first place#idk if you read this far i dont rly need u to act like u didnt see it cuz like. wouldnt have posted it otherwise#but idk why i am posting. idk what i want out of anyone who has read all this#maybe just. interact w this post in some way idk. it's actually kinda grounding for me if you can believe it#bleghh im thinkin of cheating on my weed break just to treat myself after all this. weed + a long walk would fix me
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yk i have so many thing that i could say about S3baC1el and how much i hate it but i know it’s been around forever and it’s prolly never leaving and if i said anything i’d probably get mauled (i’m terrified of the veteran fans who are in their 20s now..) so i will hold my peace i fear
#IM SORRY IM A HATER#black butler#kuroshitsuji#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#please don’t attack me#shaking in my boots rn
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SHEPHERDS OF HAVEN | @shepherds-of-haven HEADSHOT ART | @yuuugay
✦ The Godless Brightburner
— Rend the world in winter's wrath.
The magic of Aetherai relies heavily on energy and emotions to increase the intensity of their spells. Without them, spells would be rendered weak or ineffectual, losing their force and impact; what should be great gusts of wind would become gentle puffs of air. - Notes by Thorne Briers, scribbled on a worn out journal.
On the battlefield, Thorne is akin to a howling blizzard.
The smooth and unfazed demeanor he typically affects is nowhere to be seen. His movements are swift, powerful, and brutally efficient: leaping and dodging with a jagged elegance reminiscent of an icicle broken from a frozen cave mouth. There's a flash of silver as he swiftly drags the bowstring all the way back to his cheek; a sliver of a second; then the silent scream of an arrow hurtling through the air, meeting its target with vicious accuracy.
There's a razor glint of claws and he abruptly rolls back, dodging a near-fatal blow. He springs back to his feet and responds with a barrage of howling magical energy — magic that twists into hurricanes of wind and frost, knife-like icicles that rend the flesh and freeze the limbs. The storm responds to his escalating vehemence, singing with approval as it cuts and dances and destroys, obediently following his every command.
Power and emotion flood his veins like water bursting out of a dam. His blood sings with an almost feral glee. Fury and longing, grief and defiance, silver-bright intelligence and dagger-sharp cunning, a mask always hiding, concealing, performing a one-man masquerade of hollowed music and elegant smiles, shattered faith and deadened hope, sunlight thawing a winter's chill, love and loss and laughter and hands reaching out—
Beneath the blood and dust that cling to his face, storm gray eyes blaze with a sharp, glacial, light.
✦ The Mage's Phantasms
— A thousand colors to a name.
Truth be told, I'm not sure how to feel. I came to Haven hoping to find employment and perhaps enter the merchant trade, but ended up landing in the lap of the Shepherds instead. This is my reality now. While I'm not too thrilled about it, I have no choice but to continue down this path I've inexplicably stepped on — though I have no interest in being a hero and sacrificing myself on the front lines. Perhaps I'll transfer to a non-combatant position in the future. I shall fade safely into the Order's background soon enough. Then, I can return to pursuing my previous ambitions. - Entry by Thorne Briers, scribbled in a worn out journal. Written after his inititation to the Shepherds. Miscellaneous trade and business notes are jotted down on the rest of the page. It's an entry that he often views with a look of both irony and nostalgia.
Notes on Shepherd Thorne Briers, ranging from the startlingly mundane to the undeniably vital. The author is unknown.
➸ Thorne stands at 5'11". He typically carries himself with an air of grace and elegance, mannerisms painstakingly absorbed from the aristocrats and merchants he used to watch from the distance as a child. His movements notably become more erratic and excitable when around those he wholeheartedly trusts — something that he had never found until joining the Shepherds. 🌠
➸ He can be overly apathetic to the plights of strangers. He's seen too much, done too much to be easily moved by compassion or emotion. Though he's capable of giving comfort and reassurance when the situation calls for it, he would rather use detached pragmatism to assess a situation rather than give in to 'pointless' emotions such as pity and distress. One could say that he almost recoils from genuinely emotional displays — though he hides it well.
Only those close to him know of this particular aspect of his nature, however. He usually keeps it well-concealed beneath a gleaming veneer of carefully chosen words and expressions, knowing that his true nature might work against him during missions. Whether or not this makes him insincere is up to the judgement of others. 🌠
➸ Avoids making grand promises or heroic declarations. While Thorne is quite adept at manipulating a situation to his favor, there is something quite odd about him: his aversion to making direct promises. Hope can be such a light, fragile thing, and it can be so easy to give; yet when it is promised to someone only to be taken away, it can break them. He can't. He wont. Thorne doesn't trust himself. He doesn't trust himself to be this so-called hero. He will meander, he will laugh, and he will tell you that he'll be back, in his own roundabout way — but he will never ask you to trust that he'll succeed. Not yet, anyway. 🌠
➸ Possesses a vehement aversion to religion itself. Contrary to what one might think, Thorne actually thinks it's very likely that gods do exist in some shape or form. He just has absolutely no interest in worshiping them; one could even say that he despises the thought of it. It's a stark contrast to his childhood, when he would worship and pray to the One-God with his parents. The very mention of faith and religion — especially that of the One-God — can have him inwardly recoiling as he bites back the scathing words threatening to spill from his lips.
Very, very few know about it, however. Only those he implicitly trusts have been allowed to catch glimpses of the cold vitriol that he holds towards the gods — and even they don't know just how deep it runs. (Yes, he didn't take the kithma revelation very well, and still has very mixed feelings about it. Despite that, he had to grudgingly admit that it made more sense than not.) 🌠
➸ He can be unexpectedly honest when it comes to those he holds dear. Though it clearly takes him some visible effort, Thorne won't shy away from telling a friend all the reasons why he holds them in high regard. If he plucks up the nerve, he'll bluntly tell them of how important they are to him — all while wearing the flat expression of a frog about to leap into boiling water. He'll immediately find an excuse to flee after saying his piece, face prickling with rare heat all the while. 🌠
➸ Loves accessorizing and embellishing his clothes! Before joining the Shepherds, Thorne would diligently set aside a part of his earnings to spend on his more fashionable pursuits. He especially liked embroidering delicate patterns and designs on his clothes, a hobby he continued even after joining the Order. He often tests the bounds of the Order's rules by embroidering subtle yet tasteful patterns onto his Shepherd's cloak, much to Blade's consternation. 🌠
➸ It's ridiculously easy to make him laugh when among friends, a fact that has surprised many — including Thorne himself. Even the saddest joke can coax a snort of laughter from him, though he tries to explain it away with something along the lines of, "the pathetic air of it makes it funny, why are you looking at me like that—". The recruits have long grown accustomed to seeing him doubled over with laughter during breakfast over something Chase had said, sometimes choking on his honeyed milk in the process. 🌠
➸ His moral compass has been slowly (and reluctantly) shifting after joining the Shepherds. Unfortunately, the environment Thorne was given at the Shepherds Order made it all too easy to foster compassion. For the first time, he has allies, confidantes, friends — people he can genuinely trust to watch his back. It was slow, and it was gradual, but the veneer of ice and stone he kept around his heart was softening.
The pivotal moment was in Chapter Five, when Thorne had to choose between following the mission or letting Nathe win. While Thorne could bluff that he'd only allowed Nathe to win because he'd figured that Briony would make for a powerful ally, he knew in his heart of hearts that it was a lie. In that moment, as he stared into Nathe's eyes, he'd simply wanted the elf to reunite with his family. 🌠
➸ He's actually incredibly emotional (and dramatic) despite the way he doggedly conducts himself with an apathetic pragmatism. Thorne can be indifferently cold when it comes to matters of compassion. Overly rational, even. But one could say that it was a steel born out of necessity; an iron will carved out of what was once a gentle heart in order to survive alone in a world teetering on the brink of madness.
To love is to be left; it is what he has learned in his years of wandering the world alone. To rely on faith is weakness. To believe in hope is foolishness. What was once laughter and camarederie will eventually bleed into farewells and betrayals.
To love is to be left. Never again. Never again. 🌠
➸ He is afraid. He is afraid of losing everything. The more he comes to care for the Shepherds (his comrades, friends, family, even), the more terrified he becomes of losing them. The more he grows to love them with all the fierceness and softness and everything in his heart, the more he becomes afraid of driving them away. He is no hero. He is no light. He is a charlatan, full of anger and grief and so much hate that he cannot speak into the world. Hope is a word that burns at his touch. When he looks into the mirror, all he can see is a scarred visage of disappointment — a liar masquerading as a hero. 🌠
✦ Afterword



First of all. If you've actually, somehow, managed to reach the end of this monstrously long post and are somehow reading this. Thank you. So much. So very much. Also I might be on the verge of proposing (🥺🥺🥺💍💍💍) Ahead is a little afterword about Thorne and the Godless Brightburner snippet.
Thorne is a heavily flawed character — and an incredibly emotional one at that. Despite how he usually conducts himself — pragmatic, cunning, calculating, and all that jazz — he feels his every emotion like a raging howl of sleet and storm.
He used to be a child who loved the world and everything in it. He was Westwood's beloved ray of sunshine, the mayor's precocious son. It was the... events of his thirteenth birthday and his experiences as a solitary Diminished that hardened him, that turned him into the reverse of what he once was.
A bleeding heart is a weakness: so Thorne closed his heart and turned the wound into a jagged scar. There were far too many people out there who would use a naive, wide-eyed Diminished for their own gain — he learned this very quickly. He rejected his compassion, despised his own emotions, and turned himself into someone so coldly pragmatic that the boy he once was became naught but another painful memory.
It's why he has so much mixed feelings for the Shepherds, especially in the first half of the story. By then, the only one he was concerned about was himself — or so he claimed. And, if he were to be honest, he didn't consider himself very worthy of living. He didn't even know why he fought so hard to survive; why he was willing to go so far. Perhaps it was anger. Perhaps it was defiance. Or perhaps it was atonement: continuing his hazy existence in exchange for the home he had eradicated so long ago.
You could say that he's very similar to the embittered Hunters that Halek often criticizes. Those who were disillusioned by their banishment so subsequently refused to help with the demon problem. It's why doesn't really get along with the more... openly compassionate members of the order — at least not at first. All the "make the world a better place" and "protect the innocent" talk would only ever earn flatly unimpressed looks from him.
Over the course of the game, he starts to soften. Slowly, hesitantly, his view of the world starts to gentle. He becomes more open to helping others, more willing to express his true emotions instead of hiding them under a veneer of charming smiles and calculated words. He's still wary of promises and heroics, but a part of him is gradually entertaining the thought of a future soaked in sunlight rather than in shadow. Of a future where he could be happy.
Thorne's journey is one of change and new beginnings: of learning to trust others as you learn to trust yourself. He is flawed. He is frustrating. Sometimes even I want to throttle him. He shuns emotions while he drowns in them. He will conflict with the Shepherds in the order. And, yes, he has a massive case of Impostor Syndrome when it comes to his status as Hero of Haven. But he will change, and he will grow. And I'm very, very excited to see it. 🫡✨
Another thing! If the "Godless Brightburner" snippet felt familar to you, then you'd be spot on! That section was actually inspired by something from the SHOH alpha demo — it's one of my favorite passages from the game ever. I've put it just below, so beware of MINOR SPOILERS!!
(I'll be honest: this passage made me cry. Like, I was full on sniffling my heart out. I don't know why. I don't know how. But it felt so regretful. Like the hollow echo of something that once was. Vibrant and brilliant and ephemeral and gone.)
When I first read this passage, I was floored. Sniffling aside, it was just... brimming with so much life. "His essence poured into the ring". Lena had done just that. With one passage alone, the very essence of a man long gone had been given shape in strokes of heartbreaking color.
It stuck with me for a very long time — and still has. The world of SHOH has made me cry many, many, times (I will probably ramble about them in the future as well, I apologize in advance 😔) (also yes the Thurl chapter was a DOOZY) but this just... stuck. It's an incredibly beautiful peace of writing, and I never tire of it no matter how many times I reread it.
Therefore, I was inspired to do something similar for Thorne! His essence — what would it feel like? What song would it sing unto the world, if it could?
The Godless Brightburner is supposed to be about showing Thorne's very essence. The Mage's Phantasms, meanwhile, was only supposed to contain little bits and pieces about Thorne. But I think I got a bit carried away there. That section is nowhere near little. 🗿
Aaaand, that's all. Thank you so much for reading this far, and I really hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed making it!! The world of SHOH is so breathtakingly crafted, its characters so beautifully alive — I'm glad I got to give Thorne his own special place within its seams.
Thank you very much to Yuki @yuuugay for making Thorne's portrait!! I am very KSDHGJKLSDG about him and everytime I look at him I lose the ability to speech 🥺🥺🥺 You've made him so, so beautiful — thank you! You've made me so incredibly happy!
Lastly, thank you to @shepherds-of-haven for commissioning this template for us: I had a lot of fun wandering through Blest with Thorne! Exploring the world of SHOH was an experience, one with a ton of tears, dismayed yelps, and laughter. Thank you so, so much for sharing it with us. I'm looking forward to seeing how the rest of this journey unfolds together. 🥺💖
Have a very good day, and I hope you all have just as much (if not more) fun as I did on your own playthroughs and template-filling endeavors! Good luck, and thank you again!! 💖🫡💐✨



#shepherds of haven#shaking crying#i'm.... i'm done#it's finished#im in state of disbelief rn hold on#this became SO LONG#this project was so so fun to work on#i'm both happy and sad that it's finished#aaaaah#to anyone who clicks that read more link: thank you. i appreciate you very very much 🥹🥹🥹 also im sorry HSDHGHDSGDGH#shoh#oc: thorne#oc template#aspen's blorbos.txt
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wizards with their robes hiked up 2025. should i start a counter
#varanus zard#sorry im very old man shakes fist at cloud rn#cloak fancy#i really think this is what feminism needs right now
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Eren Jeager. This mf is like a wildfire, burning through my thoughts 24/7. I'm down bad, like head-over-heels, can't-stop-thinking-about-him bad. Eren Jaeger wreck my emotional landscape any day. I'm talking deep-down, dirty obsession for that guy – he's a walking, talking damn fantasy that I can't get out of my damn head. The dude's got a jawline so sharp; it could cut through the chaos he brings. I am so insane about this guy, i don't think there is enough words in the english dictionary to describe my feelings for him. Pure freaking chaos. I'm so down bad for him; I'd do some crazy shit, like drinking his bathwater. PLEASE SPARE ME ONE GLANCE. Seeing this dude makes my mouth straight-up water, man. I'm not even kidding – it's like a Pavlovian response to his existence. I start shaking, and it's not nerves. Plus, hear me out – I'd willingly let this man wreck me, body and soul. I'm talking about offering up everything, letting him bulldoze through me until I'm just a pile of dirt. Eren, if you're out there, bring on the ruin. I'm ready to be reduced to nothing but a damn mess for you. I love hobo Eren, short haired Eren, titan Eren, sauna Eren, summer Eren, winter Eren, spring Eren, bald Eren, 7 minutes Eren, modern AU Eren, pink suit Eren, golf player Eren, manbun Eren, PATHS EREN, guitarist Eren, CABIN EREN, hair down Eren. I LOVE IT ALL. Every damn day, I find myself praying to the heavens, begging God to send Eren to me. The mere thought of Eren consumes my mind, and I'm on the brink of losing it. I'm so down bad for him. I'm foaming at the mouth and i can not stop myself. I'm telling you, I'd go to the ends of the damn earth for every version of Eren. If he showed up at my doorstep Hobo Eren fashion, asking for beer money, I'd practically hand over my entire existence. I'd throw my bank account at him, grab those beers, and just fucking chill and roll joints w him or something. It's a level of down bad that's bordering on absurd.
#eren jaeger#aot#attack on titan#im insane#im obsessed#eren aot#not ok rn#going crazy#not normal#this is not a joke#this is not a call for help#i love him#hobo eren#i love hobo eren#paths eren is too good to be true#shaking crying throwing up#mental hospital#down bad#im sorry#im so normal about him (lying)#eren yeager
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YALL OH MY GOD I GOT A 92 ON MY ORGANIC CHEM FINAL HOLY SHIT

#sorry this is a big deal for me but#I DID SO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD OH MY GOD#im shaking rn oh my god i’m so happy#SEMESTER IS FINALLY FUCKING OVER!!!!!!!!#SENIOR YEAR LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOO#still have to take organic chem ii tho 😔#maddie’s nonsense
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Hey y’all. School just ended and ya boy got a deeply unpleasant surprise. 

I forgot to screenshot previous messages beforehand but it happened recently so I remember it.
At 3:15 pm this man followed my blog and sent me a mess saying “Hi, How are you doing”.
As per usual I sent my message about “I am a minor and I aint bying commissions.”
He then sent me the above message. He has been swiftly blocked. Anyways uh block him if y’all wanna stay safe, I genuinely don’t know what any of what he said means but it sounded creepy.
I changed all my dms to only people I follow, sorry but I aint taking risks
#jesus. for once my mothers paranoia is real.#im shaking real bad rn so sorry if my spelling is ass#my fingers aint typing good rn.#tw: creepy
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It's been so long since the last time I hallucinated that I forget how jumpy and skittish I get afterwards guhhhh
#im okay the hallucinations werent bad in what i saw and felt but#struggling with sleep and perceiving reality can individually trigger me a loy#so combining them made for a combo that wouldve been devastating hadnt i come this far in recovery#and it helped that friend was there to help me talk through it#but man i still notice how affected i get by it#every little noise every little shadow im jumping and freaking out by reflex over the most minor things#even my sibling walking up without me realizing terrified me in a way it doesnt normally#and again what i saw and perceived during the hallucinations wasnt even bad!!!#i just cant seem to shake off the awful feelings afterwards even when i dont panic about it#i was told by doctor who helped me getting on meds back in the day that like#id likely always be prone to various degrees of relapse during stress#which i noticed a lot#but its been 2 years of relative peace and 1 year since i shook off the last remnants affecting me daily#and even in just that year i somehow forgot just how easy it is to fall back into those fears#but im calm rn and able to sit outside in the dark without feeling even a smidge of fear#so jumping from noises is fine all things considered#the fact that i even got to this point is proof enough#anyway sorry for venting#silvi talks
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