#sorry for the term 'butt stuff'

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

current editing moodboard, please send help

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

Had a terribly great thought! The Ghoul and reader traveling together. She's a brat but loyal as a dog to that man. They get into a pretty bad fight and she storms off and he's too proud to follow after her, struggling with coming to terms that he's actually soft for her even though he's mean as hell. She finds him some days later, with her tail tucked between her legs. He's not surprised, comparing her to a female dog often. 👀 still, he's going to make sure she's sorry. Lots of groveling on her part, maybe some face slapping, boot licking, he gets off, she doesn't. Ends with her in his lap. Hair petting and praise for coming back to who she belongs to.

As A Dog

Pairing: Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Female Reader

Word Count: 7,085

Warnings: smut (18+), DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT, Jealous!Cooper, canon-typical violence, intimacy issues, angst, insecurity, slightly fucked conceptions of love and loyalty, pet play-ish activity, hard drug use, forced intoxication, shotgunning, slapping, boot licking, oral sex (male receiving), face fucking, rough sex, riding, cannibalistic thoughts, orgasm denial (female), breeding kink, creampie.

Notes: I had several pieces in line in front of this one and then this prompt reached through my screen, sunk its teeth into my brain, and shook me until this came out. It really is a terribly great thought. Tagging heavy, since the themes/Cooper's mentality may be triggering for some. It is what it says on the can, folks.

I dunno what unholy demon you've unleashed on me here, Anon. But bless you for it. Another Coop POV because I have a problem. Thanks for the patience on this one; I've been doing some admin stuff the last few days, including setting up an AO3 that you can find here, where I'll be uploading all the long-form stuff. Enjoy!

Cooper's trigger finger was itchier today than it had been for a long time.

He was fully aware that he'd never be able to stop every man left in the world from talking to his little vaultie companion, but boy, he sure would love to try. On an average day, he struggled to hold his tongue as she drove away her own sun-baked suitors, standing silently aside until called up to defend her, no matter how badly he wanted to reduce whomever was bothering her to nothing.

Today was a worse-than-average day, and the girl wasn't helping anything, herself.

"Are you gonna be ready to go any time soon, princess?" he asked her acerbically as she passed by him for the millionth time, tossing his current cigarette down to the ground.

He'd intended to stop at this shitty little settlement, little more than a dingy bighorner ranch at first glance, for a few minutes at most, just long enough to unload some things and check to see if they had any vials on hand. Here it was, nearly four hours of glad-handing and chit-chatting and unnecessary gun repairs later, and he was still leaning against the same crumbing wall, still angrily smoking. She was pushing it.

"Oh, be patient." she shot back, rolling her eyes as she turned to saunter back to the little ramshackle counter. "I'm waiting for my gun back and I was having a nice chat with the mechanic. Try to be pleasant for five minutes, would you?"

She was so full of shit, he thought as he snuffed the still-glowing smoke butt out beneath the toe of his boot with just a little more force than necessary. Typically, she shied away from male attention at her most demure, refusing to acknowledge most advances, playing innocent, playing dumb. The big doe eyes and soft voice didn't hurt on that front, but usually didn't deter the more steadfast predators.

He preferred the days where she had a little extra spitfire, when she told them clearly and loudly to fuck off, no doubt emboldened by having the rather intimidating ghoul hanging over her shoulder, silently encouraging her as she did it. In the past, she had proven that she wasn't above evoking his capacity for violence as a threat when the desert trash was persistent, and it gave him a thrill he couldn't identify, one that ruminated deep in his gut.

That same gut feeling was burning him now, eating a hole in his patience as he watched her listening attentively to the third scrawny young man who'd approached her as she waited around the repair hutch to yap her ear off. She nodded and smiled politely, even laughed from time to time (the sound of which made him want to shoot he kid between the eyes just for that), but kept a respectful distance. Clearly, she'd finally learned that the sort of over-friendliness that she'd been raised with in the vaults could be read differently up here. The young buck, however, continued to try and dance into her space as he spoke animatedly, and, eventually, she reached out and quickly touched his chest.

The old cowboy was stomping across the sand to her before he was even aware he was moving.

His logical brain could see very clearly what had happened: the boy had advanced into her space for the half-dozenth time and she'd put her palm out to gently rebuke him, distracting him from the rejection with a laugh at whatever he'd said. But that part of his brain was rather quiet after a long afternoon of watching her rather blatantly flirt with the asshole she was having repair her plasma pistol (something that she would typically have him do, since it wouldn't cost her anything, and he almost certainly could do with equal or superior adequacy), and letting every other little piss-ant farmhand in the next mile radius chat her up.

"We're hitting the road in five. Get your shit and let's go." he hissed to her, ignoring the little scowl she shot him as he interrupted her newest conversation with the willowy, greasy mechanic, who was sliding her her pistol back across the knotted wood of the semi-exposed countertop. Flashing him that brilliant smile, the one that he wanted to be only for him, she checked the thing over before tucking it back into the holster she kept on her hip, pushing a stash of caps in a metal tin back his way. The old cowboy watched with inflamed indignation as the fucker opened the box, dug out a massive handful, and tucked them back into her hands, letting his own linger across her skin as he placed them back into her palms.

Frankly, he was impressed he was able to let her drop the things back into her bag before he grabbed her by the arm, none too gently, and wordlessly began to yank her back down the road, back in the direction they'd originally been heading in. He could've shoved the damn things in himself and just dragged her along; it wasn't like he was unfamiliar with where she put them. The long, sleepless nights could be boring, and early on, he'd been curious enough about her to nose through her things once or thrice. That, like this, had been quite illuminating.

"Oh, you're being such a prick today!" she yelled, yanking at his grip in an attempt to free herself. He humored her, dropping her arm and turning to face her, unpleasantly surprised as the last farmhand she'd been chatting with, the one she'd touched, came running up.

"Hey, leave her alone!" he yelled. Or, he would have, if he'd had a chance to finish.

The sound of Cooper's rifle butt cracking into the kid's face was incredibly satisfying, collapsing him into a limp, useless pile on the ground, deep crimson pooling around where he lie face-down in the dirt. The girl didn't scream, probably surprised that he hadn't outright shot him, but her hands did fly to her mouth in a quick moment of silent shock before she kneeled to quickly check his pulse, rolling his ugly mug to face the sun. Blood poured from his obviously broken nose, leaving the old ghoul wiping at his face to cover the smirk it sent twitching across his lips.

"What did you do that for?!" she demanded, frustration clear in her voice.

"Oh, my apologies, sweetheart. Your little boyfriend there was trying to join a party he wasn't invited to." he replied, though she was clearly ignoring him in favor of turning the boy onto his side and examining him.

His little companion let out a huff, casting a look between the body on the ground and the little cluster of buildings they'd just left. After a moment, she grabbed him by the fabric of his shirt the best she could and began to drag him back towards where he'd come from. The ghoul watched her pull him about five feet, red and huffing by the time she made it there, rolling his eyes deeply.

"Leave him. He'll be fine."

"He won't be if no one comes over to collect him soon, and you know it." she snarled, and her tone sent him seething, snatching the kid up over his shoulder like a sack of spuds and stomping ahead of her, depositing him unceremoniously against the ranch's handmade sign before yanking her along with him once again.

"Y'know, if you'd have just gotten in and out like I told you, that wouldn't have happened." he said eventually, dropping her arm once more.

"Oh, fuck you!" she hissed. "I was trying to see if I could talk him down on the price. And sometimes people know useful things, you know!" she yelled, exasperation clear in her tone as she threw her arms up in the air.

She pretended to be ignorant, but clearly knew what he was upset about before he specified. Interesting.

"Oh, I'm sure. Y'know, I'd wondered how long it was gonna take you to start sellin' that little ass of yours. Figured it would be for something nicer than a pistol repair or some bad intel, at least." he sneered. He could feel himself slipping further from rationality.

"What are you talking about? It wasn't even like that!" she insisted, an edge of something more worrisome creeping into her voice.

"Quit playin' dumb, doll. You make it seem too easy." he said, watching her entire face light up bright red in frustration. She was tersely quiet for a minute, the gears in her head clearly turning hard and fast as she worked to contain herself and formulate a response at the same time.

"I'm sick of you getting pissed off and treating me like I'm the stupidest person you've ever met." she spat, eventually, madder than he'd ever seen her. "I'm sorry that I haven't spent enough bitter fucking years walking around the desert and killing things and being an asshole to know everything like you do, Coop. I'm sorry I still have human emotions and desires. My sincerest fucking apologies."

That was it: the argument had officially become about...something else.

Honestly, he'd assumed that she was going to leave him a few days back, when they'd stayed in a rare hotel room waiting for a bad dust storm to settle, the little thing getting just a tad too tipsy on some whiskey he'd given her before trying to kiss him. He'd rebuffed her, though not as gently as he wished he had, and, feeling bold, she'd pushed back with surprising fervor, basically demanding to know why he wouldn't kiss her more, why he wouldn't sleep with her.

True, he felt closer to her than he'd felt to anyone or anything in a long while, and he thought she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, but, as embarrassing as it was, the idea of being expected to perform sexually so suddenly made him feel a seizing sense of panic that he wasn't sure he'd ever felt before.

What he'd wanted to say was "I care about you so much, but I'm not sure I'm ready to take that step." Instead, what had come out was "Why are you buggin' me about this? I said no. Fuck off." followed by him storming out to spend several hours smoking in the decrepit, junk-walled-in parking lot.

When he'd returned, she'd been asleep, her poor face tear-swollen and red. He'd waited for her to rouse and hash it out with him, but she'd slept through the night, and, the next morning, didn't bring it up or seem amenable to discussing it. She hadn't seemed angry, necessarily, perhaps a little sad, but in the few days that had passed since, she had definitely been colder, poutier than usual.

It seemed, to him, that she was punishing him now for not doing what she'd wanted, and it was pissing him off.

It didn't matter that he hadn't fucked her yet, that he didn't feel ready to expose the most vulnerable parts of him, inside and out, so openly. She was his; she belonged to him and she knew it as much as he did. The fact that she was even still traveling with him after all this time, after what happened at the hotel that night, was proof. She proved it every single time she came back from one of her little stomp-offs every time he ticked her off, lacking the wherewithal to ever even move fully out of sight before slinking down to pout awhile, inevitably peeking out from whatever she was hiding behind to see if he was still there. Despite her lack of proper training, she was a loyal little bitch.

The fact that she suddenly didn't want to act accordingly sat entirely wrong in his mind, wriggled under his skin like when his stash ran low.

"All's I'm saying, princess," he growled, throwing out the nickname he knew she loathed once more, "is that you're too fucking friendly for your own good, and you shouldn't be shocked when it gets people hurt."

"Why would you give a shit who I'm friendly to, anyway?" she spat, suddenly pushing her way right into his bubble and sending him baring his teeth.

"I wouldn't. Didn't I made that clear enough the other night?"

He knew that this particular barb would hurt her, but he genuinely didn't expect what she did next.

"Alright, then." she said; her voice was trembling noticeably, as was her lower lip. With that, she snatched her backpack up from the ground, jammed her arms into the straps, turned, and began to walk back towards the way they'd come from. He watched her silently, waiting for her to duck back into the ranch, but she didn't; instead, she kept walking, as long as he could watch her, until she disappeared over the hill that fed into the horizon.

The old man watched her go, dumbfounded as she actually continued to walk instead of stopping as she always did. For a while, he hung around, waiting for her to come huffing back, but she still hadn't by the time the sun had fully sunk out of the sky. Eventually, he resumed moving himself, stopping after about a mile in their original planned direction, settling down for a grating night of looking out over the road at every little noise.

She'd never even looked back. He couldn't shake that thought from his mind as he sat there resting overnight. It was basically the only thought he had for hours, plaguing him as he puffed his inhaler and watched the world around him brighten with the rising sun.

When the next day started in full, he'd resolved to hit the road, to resume his travels as he would be resuming his existence before the girl had come along. Compared to how long he'd been exploring the desert solo, she'd been but a brief blip in his life, and there was no reason to fret so much over where she'd gone or what could happen to her without him around.

For some reason, he only covered about half the ground he would typically cover on a day like this, and he found himself beyond unreasonably frustrated...with himself. Nothing about the conditions was slowing him down; he didn't run into more trouble than usual, and he was fine on supplies, vials, but for some reason he found himself hypervigilant, looking for any excuse to move up high and scan the road with his binoculars.

By the time it was too dark to safely continue, he was seething once again, but at his weakness, at his cowardice. After he chose a tucked away little corner to settle down in for a few hours, he quite literally couldn't dig into his stash fast enough, doing line after line, hit after hit of whatever he had on him, until the horrible pain he felt behind his breastbone melted away into a familiar, soothing numbness.

But his numb mind liked to wander, and soon he found himself thinking about the softness of her voice, her skin, her lips against his that night...

And, quickly, he was back to pain and anger, but an irrational anger fueled by a far-more than reasonable dose of basically every kind of stimulant known to Wasteland man. This pain, too, was chased away with more and more chems, until he was so fucked up that he could barely keep his eyes focused and open.

She truly did plague him now, just as she had all the months she'd traveled with him. She plagued his thoughts at all points in the day, plagued his worries about the future, and even as he attempted to snort and huff himself free of the thought of her, she plagued him, dancing up along beside him in a quiet, stalking creep, watching him daintily from the end of the rotted log he sagged himself on, his back wedged against the large rock cluster behind him. At some point, he'd tugged his gloves off and shucked them somewhere nearby, leaving him feeling quite naked as his hands fretted with themselves absentmindedly. Against his will, he thought about running them through her hair like he'd wanted to for so long, and the unpleasant flip his stomach did made him sigh.

"I'm sorry." came a voice on the breeze, so much like hers. The visions of her were persistent, annoyingly so, the one staring hauntingly at him from the side really starting to unsettle him. He was no stranger to visual and auditory hallucinations when he was this far gone, but she was so solid-looking out of the corner of his eye, watching him so close. Judging him and what a fuck-up he was.

He squeezed his eyes shut hard, willing her away, willing himself to go back a few days and redo this entire thing differently.

"Aren't you...gonna say anything?" came the soft, timid voice once more, this time from beside him. Firmer, realer.

He narrowed his eyes in her ghostly direction, focusing as best as he could on her blurry, swimming visage.

"Huh. Didn't know that was really you."

When had she arrived, exactly? Fuck, he was dangerously gone if she'd been able to sneak up on him like that.

She frowned at that, leaning close and sizing him up with worrying eyes. Gingerly, she placed her palm on the back of his bare hand.

"Jeez, Cooper. How fucked up are you?" she asked, her tone sincere, almost apologetic.

Her glaring worry burned into him as judgment, harsh and stinging, and he struck out in response, yanking his hand away.

"Mind your fuckin' business." he slurred, forcing himself to sit up straight enough to point his full anger in her direction, growing with each passing moment. "Think you're better'n me? Hmm?"

He'd fully expected this to ignite another yelling match between the two of them, but she didn't scream back; instead, she quietly dropped her head, avoiding his eyes as she gazed around where he'd chosen to bed down. Truly, he was quite impressed she'd managed to find him at all, let alone in the dark. Turns out he was rubbing off on her even more than he'd thought. The idea left him bitter.

A big part of the anger he felt, the ugliest, most violent part, was the Jet; he knew this. The stuff had gotten him into more than his share of scuffles through the years, making him even meaner than usual, his sharp tongue exact and piercing. However, beneath the amphetamine fog, there was a nugget of true bitterness, an open wound of insecurity that pained him into lashing out when she tried to come close. He'd lashed out in such a way that night at the hotel, despite how hard he'd tried to hold back his sour words.

There was a fear there that he'd felt before, but never so strongly as when he'd watched her disappear over that hill. If she'd tried to leave over that relatively small argument, when would she try to leave again? He wasn't a pleasant man to be around, even when he actually tried to be, a lot of the time. Hell, he wasn't even pleasant to look at; if he'd been a giant prick in his old life, at the very least, he had been handsome.

Increasingly, since she'd come into his life, he tried to reach deep, deep into himself and pull out whatever remained of the old him, the one who was kind and hopeful and actually knew how to talk to women, but the process was infinitely more difficult and painful than he'd imagined.

She clearly wanted and needed intimacy from him, on more than one front, and the pressure of feeling like he couldn't give her what she needed was increasingly getting to him in a way that embarrassed him more than he could possibly say (not that he'd ever say it out loud). Centuries of time had passed, and yet, here he was, still dealing with the same anxieties and feelings of inadequacy that he had before, just dressed up in a new, uglier face.

When would he finally succeed in pushing her away, in frightening her away from him 'for her own good'? The walls around him had never failed him before, for better or worse.

Things were quiet between them as she fidgeted in her spot, the tension of an inescapable conversation in the air, but the desert's constant score, the hiss of sand across corroded asphalt, the soft rattle of the wind in the rocky hills, played on. His muddled ears played tricks on him, making him hear murmurs and distant gunshots and the crack of his rifle butt into that farmhand's face, but he tuned them out, focusing on her steadying, but increasingly heavy breathing, his eyes unable to leave her mouth..

He let himself drink in the fact that she really was there, sat on her knees in the dirt before him and already begging him for his forgiveness, for his acceptance; corporeal, flesh and blood and her sweet smell and that wet, warm place between her legs. Only in his drug-induced private fantasies had he felt it, but he knew he wanted to bury himself there, as deep as possible, and never let her pull away.

"I really am sorry, Coop." she whispered, those big, round eyes brimming with big, wet tears. It wasn't difficult to see her sincerity, even as he struggled to focus. But that hot coal of bitter anger still smoldered in his gut; not replaced by the lust he felt, but fed by it.

Slowly, his own movements labored under the weight of too many substances, he reached out and ran the thumb of his sullied glove along her smooth, smooth cheek. Smearing the trail of wetness there until he was tracing the outline of those pouty lips, he pushed it into her mouth.

"Prove it."

She let out a pitiful little retch, though whether it was from the taste of the incredibly filthy material, or because he was shoving her tongue back in her throat and gagging her with it, he didn't know. What he did know was that the sound made his cock twitch, which was already more blatant sexual desire than he'd felt in ages.

"How?" she asked, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand as he pulled his own away. The wetness that trailed from his thumb, from her lips, made him feel feverish, and he quickly knotted his hand into the thick, soft hair at the back of her head, yanking her so close that their noses would've been touching, had he still had one. When her wide eyes met his, not so much as a sound escaping her lips at the sensation in her scalp, he finally gave in and harshly mashed his mouth to hers, swallowing the sigh that escaped her as he did.

Cooper was unsure how long they kissed, how long he plundered her swollen, eager mouth with his tongue before she stumbled onto her knees, pulling back slightly to pull air into her lungs. As she hovered there, eyes closed as she attempted to gather herself, he dug deep into the pocket of his duster and withdrew a Jet container, giving it a shake to prime it as she righted her breathing. Once she was steady once more, he cupped the back of her head again, bringing her to him and lifting it to her mouth. There was hesitation in her eyes, then disgust as the chem filled her lungs. It touched him with a twinge of amusement, knowing how badly the stuff tasted, watching her retch harder than before. He let her cough for a few seconds, allowing her a few half-cocked breaths of air before shoving the thing back between her lips and holding it down even longer.

By the time she managed to stop sputtering and drooling, he'd had a hit of his inhaler and started stroking his increasingly hard cock through his pants, watching her closely as she raised her now bleary, glassy eyes towards him. He waited for her to mouth off, to complain, to remark on anything that had happened, but instead, she sat there, unmoving, waiting for his instructions. She was the picture of obedience, but nevertheless, he could still see that glint of outrage behind her gaze, waiting to argue with him the moment she sensed an opportunity.

It pissed him off more than he thought possible, and, before he could even think to stop himself, he lashed out and slapped her across the face, the blow landing squarely in the center of her cheek and making her head turn away from him slightly. Surprising him again, she didn't make a sound, but she also didn't correct her head to look back at him.

Pulling a long drag off of the Jet inhaler himself, he held it deep in his lungs as he grabbed her by her long hair to kiss her again, exhaling the stuff right down into her lungs. She kissed him back until she choked on the sensation, leaning away to spew and cough more.

"Wanna prove you're sorry?" he hissed, his brain buzzing with the fresh hit as she leaned against his knee. "Clean my boots, vaultie. Show a little humility for once in your life."

His words were mean, meaner than he should be right now, but she didn't seem to register their full weight as she struggled to focus her eyes on the boots in question. When she lifted those dark, glassy pools back to his, he could see she knew what he meant, a heavy blush staining her cheeks and neck. Of course she knew what he meant; she was a smart girl, and her brain worked so much like his, even if she wouldn't freely admit it.

She looked up at him so dreamily through those thick lashes, though whether it was real affection in her eyes or simply the haze from all the Jet he'd forced down into her lungs, he couldn't tell.

In truth, his boots weren't as filthy as they could've been, as he'd cleaned the farmhand's blood off of them the night she'd taken off to get rid of the smell. But it wasn't about cleanliness; no, she'd humiliated him, her and her spoiled, entitled vault-dweller attitude, when she ran off, and he wanted to see her humiliate herself a little in kind.

The woman kneeling before him didn't hesitate as much as he'd thought she would, the red outline of his palm and fingers seeming to glow on her cheek in the dying firelight as she cast a vaguely-seeing glance around her, measuring her space before pulling herself into a sort of downward dog position, her round ass in the air as her marred cheek rested softly on the sandy ground. There was a moment of quiet tension as she seemed to study it, planning her approach before rather timidly leaning forward and running her tongue along the side, swiping a clean stripe across the tarnished black material from ball to toe. She gagged at first, likely from the dryness of the dust, but, again, she didn't complain.

He didn't have to tell her to clean the other boot; she did it with no prompting as soon as the first was finished, gagging less as she ran her pretty pink tongue all along the sullied, scuffed leather, and he couldn't believe how much it turned him on while equally failing to quell his indignation, his disappointment. Before she'd really finished her work, he yanked her up by her hair again; this time, she let out a slight yelp of surprise as he dropped her onto her ass, gesturing to her shabby, scavenged armor with one hand as the other began to wrestle his ammo belt, then his actual belt, open.

"Take that shit off."

Again, she did as he asked with only a moment's pause, placing all the little pieces of boiled leather and metal off to the side, her eyes flitting to him for a heartbeat before she proceeded with the rest of her clothes, quickly exposing herself completely. He could see her well in the moonlight, but not as well as he'd have liked, leaving her standing there, vulnerable and shivering ever-so-slightly as he took a good, long look at her. He was painfully hard at this point, desperate to have at least some minor relief from the confines of his trousers, but he was also uncharacteristically nervous at the idea of exposing himself to her this way. Beckoning her forward, he used her distraction as she kneeled once more to pull his cock free, grateful for the darkness and her weaker eyes.

"Suck me." he growled.

While he wasn't exactly pleased at how entirely fucked up he'd been going into this, he was sort of grateful that he couldn't feel almost anything with any vivid detail across the expanse of his body; the visual of her wrapping her dainty little fingers around him and obediently leaning down to take him into her mouth alone would have been enough to finish him if he'd have been able to feel her properly.

The way she went about it also seemed to indicate she wasn't entirely experienced, simply sliding her mouth down over his cock and setting to finding a pace that she could handle, as everything was surely spinning for her. For a while, he let her do so, fingers knotting into her hair again, before his patience wore thin and he began to push her head downwards, the sound of her gagging once more sending a thrill up his spine. Even with the numbness from the most recent hit seeping through him, he wasn't able to keep it up long before he yanked her back, taking in the drool hanging down from her swollen lips.

Cooper gave his spit-slicked cock a few firm tugs, hissing from between his worn teeth at her as he sat back, making room for her on his lap.

"Now get up here and show me you know who you belong to."

She didn't even look towards her bag, towards the condoms he knew she kept tucked deep inside her little toiletry pocket, as she quickly and sloppily pulled herself up into his lap. A part of him knew that he'd have stopped her if she did try to put one on him.

He tried so hard to not think of Barb as the pretty young thing on top of him began to sink down and envelop his cock in her heat, tried so hard to not feel guilty for giving himself to another, and he failed miserably. She felt heavenly, tighter and warmer and sweeter than he could've ever imagined, and he hated himself for how much he loved it, for how alive it made him feel when for so long he'd simply been existing. The choked noise that left his dry throat as the aching head of him fully breached her wasn't a sob, but he wouldn't have known what to call it.

It must've seemed to her, he thought, that he was forcing her to do all the work out of anger, wanting her to fully prove that she wanted him, that she was his; this was true, but he was also terrified, deep down, of how he would react if he allowed himself to freely touch her the way he wanted. He feared he would literally rip her limb from limb in his intoxicated state, sink his teeth into her pillowy flesh until it bled, tear a chunk off of her and swallow it so that she could be part of him forever.

He couldn't tell if the way she huffed and whimpered her way down his length was because she was high and hypersensitive or because she'd never been with a man this way before. That thought was quickly and harshly banished from his brain, however, his hands finding the plush fat of her hips, fingertips digging hard into the soft, supple flesh.

"Good pup." he breathed out when he eventually felt her ass rest on his thighs, fully sheathing him inside her.

The whimper she let out in response, her tight little clasp quivering around him as she clumsily reached out and braced her hands on his shoulders, made him throb hard, leaving him at least slightly grateful for his intoxication once again. If his numbed brain and body had been able to feel her fully, he knew he would've absolutely shot his load already.

Cooper struggled to stay still as she moved experimentally on top of him, lifting and lowering and grinding herself a few different ways before she found a rhythm that made him let out a throaty moan, the ghost of a smile flashing across her sleepy face as she rode away at him for a while.

What he really wanted, deep beneath all the unwanted feelings and unanswered questions about things he didn't want to think about right now, was to knock her up. For so long now he'd thought of her as his, and now that he'd claimed her, he wanted nothing more than to see her round and full to the brim of him. He wanted her to need him, to be completely dependent on him to provide for her and keep her safe.

He wanted her too vulnerable to get away from him.

On top of him, her movements were rapidly losing all coordination as her glossy, heavy eyelids drifted shut, her head nodding violently as she struggled to maintain her pace. He'd given her too much for someone who didn't use regularly, someone her size, and she was crashing out, falling asleep against her will right there. Poor thing.

He slapped her again, the sound ringing out across the vast, empty desert, watching closely as she startled back into a fully upright posture, her hips stilling for a moment before slowly beginning to churn again, her gaze unfocused.

"Mmm." she murmured groggily, leaning forward and placing her forehead against his shoulder, her arms winding around his neck as she tried her best to keep in some sort of motion.

This gesture, the way she cuddled up to him and sought comfort, support from him, even after the way he'd treated her, the fact that he'd literally just slapped her awake, was the only thing she'd done thus far that truly quelled the ugly, raging anger inside him.

"Thought this stuff was s'posed to wake you up." she sighed into the crook of his neck. She was entering the peak of her high, her body pitifully liquid against his chest as she clearly struggled to stay upright.

Personally, Cooper was reaching the un-fun part of his comedown, where everything started to feel grating and the mind began to uncloud, providing an increasingly painful level of clarity, but the senses remained muddled in a way that provided more discomfort than relief.

"Usually does. You had too much, baby." he responded, the mild chastisement in his tone doing a poor job of hiding the guilt behind it. His naked hands stroked reverently at her back, at the long, wind-swept hair that flowed down it, mindful to hold her so that she wouldn't lilt too far to one side as he attempted to soothe her.

Familiar with the unpleasant swimming sensation too much Jet could give you, he let her relax fully against him, the small sigh she let out one of gratitude as her whole body sagged even further. But she didn't stop grinding against him, probably out of some sort of pleasure for herself, he figured as he could feel her greedy insides tugging around him. He hid his grin again, this time in the crook of her neck as his hands found her hips once more, easily lifting her a few inches before dropping her down again, bouncing her on his cock as she rested.

Things went on like that for a spell, him bobbing and rocking her naked, lax body on top of his as she curled up on his shoulder, cooing and nodding off from time to time. As his high wore off, the sensitivity in his body was returning, and it made her feel more and more overwhelming as he continued to fuck her, her hot, wet little cunt leaking all over him as he continued to use her body to get himself off.

She seemed to be more conscious now than before, though barely, jostled awake by the increasing force of his thrusts up into her, bare breasts heaving with the movement. For a brief moment, he allowed himself to trace his lips down her chest, sealing them around her puffy, erect nipple and swiping his tongue along her slightly salty flesh. In response, her arms tightened around his neck, holding him on her breast as she clenched around him hard.

"Cooper." she whimpered, and that single little sound pushed him right into what felt like the most powerful orgasm he'd ever had, his fingers digging into her hips far too hard as he dropped her full weight onto him, grinding her down onto his cock and yanking her against him. His head dropped back, dead weight as he let out a feral snarl, tapering off into a throaty moan.

As he throbbed his gift up inside her, she squirmed at the feeling, tucking her bright red face into the side of his neck in what read as slight embarrassment, giving little huffs and whimpers as he continued to fill her. Another, smaller wave of guilt nagged at him as she clung to him, as he held her as close as he possibly could, struggling to regain control of his breathing; even if she'd had sex before, she'd never done this.

He held her as long as she could tolerate, her grip around him loosening slowly as she moved closer to real sleep. His girl was exhausted through and through, lightly snoozing against his chest.

For a few minutes, he let her rest uninterrupted, scanning her over to assess how badly he'd fucked up. She seemed fairly intact, though certainly more bruised than before. Eventually, he went digging into her bag, knowing (hoping) that she would have Radaway somewhere, and letting out a small sigh of relief when he found some jammed into the bottom.

Only one dose; he would have to find her more, and soon. This would be enough to see her through the next day, though, and he was pleasantly surprised to note that she wasn't showing even minor signs of radiation sickness as he found a vein in her arm, starting up the intravenous line to administer the thick, yellowed solution. Surprisingly, she didn't rouse fully when he slid the included needle into place, but she did begin to stir and groan mildly as the stuff began to effuse. Dimly, he remembered being given it when he'd been in the service, and how shitty it could make you feel.

Softly, he stroked her cheek with the backs of his bare knuckles before setting to jabbing her with a Stimpak from his bag around where she'd stuck some staples in her belly, making a note to ask her what had given her the several inches-long laceration he saw there.

He hesitated, though, when he moved to give her a dose of Med-X he'd dug out from the depths of his saddlebag. Most of the Wasteland's mind-rotting and pain-soothing substances were on the table for him, and in great amounts, but he hated the way the opiate made him sluggish and sleepy, reducing his accuracy in a fight significantly. The pain relief it provided wasn't worth it if he ended up dead anyway.

Smoothskins loved it, though, so he usually kept a few syringes on him for bartering purposes. Never did he think he'd be happy to give so much of his stash away for free.

He knew she must be hurting, or, she would be when she woke up, whenever that was. But he was hesitant to give her anything else, both for fear of how she would react, and, somewhat selfishly, because he knew a proper dose would make her sleep even longer, and he was desperate to actually get to speak with her again.

If she asked for the stuff, he'd give it to her. But...tomorrow. After they'd gotten a chance to discuss everything that had happened with cooler, more sober heads. After he was sure she wouldn't wake up in the morning and hate him for what he'd done to her.

His fingers played softly in her mussed hair as the indigo cover of night faded into the periwinkle of twilight, washing her nearly grey in his arms. She slept hard awhile, undisturbed until the awkward angle of her neck made him gently resettle her into a more comfortable-seeming position, letting her slip down until she was curled up in a ball on her side in his lap, her head supported in the crook of his elbow. Lying this way, he'd have to hold her up while she slept, but he found himself strangely excited at the prospect.

"M'sorry I ran away." she murmured suddenly after a long period of silence, readjusting herself in his lap to curl closer.

"I know, kid. I forgive you." he replied after a moment of hesitation, the words soft and strange as they formed on his lips. He petted her hair as gently as he could manage. "Did a good job findin' your way back to me, pup. Proud of you."

"Mmm. Please don't be mad at me." she echoed his own thoughts softly, so slurred as she finally began into unconsciousness that it was barely intelligible, her face buried in his side.

"I'm not." he said, fully, completely honest for once in his long life. He let his eyelids rest, his hand on his gun, ready to stop anyone who would try to ruin this quiet moment under the fading stars. "I promise. Now, get some sleep, pup. I know you came a long way today."

She sighed at that, as if to say "You have no idea." before flopping loosely into his arms, and was snoring lightly within a minute. He allowed himself a small smile at this, at how earnest and adorable she was.

"Good girl." he murmured.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

Hope Morphin Q&A

About a few months ago, I got a message from a surprising source: @hmrphin/Hope Morphin.

In case you don't know, Hope Morphin is a model and makeup artist who the character of Marc was based on. I also made a post about how their friendship with Astruc had ended thanks to the Rising Sun Flag controversy, which they had actually read one day. We talked a little, and they told me to message them on their Instagram to confirm that this is the real Hope.

They said they'd be down to answer some questions, I came up with a few, and I got their permission to post this on my account. So, without further ado, as Sid the Science Kid once said, let's go get some answers.

Question: When did you and Thomas first get to know each other, and how?

Answer: It was years ago, when the series premiered on TFOU. There were a lot of people complaining on twitter that the characters of the show were in 3D instead of in 2D, and I answered one of Thomas' tweets saying that characters' butts looked better in 3D rather than in 2D (yeah, I had a terrible sense of humor back then, glad I don't do that anymore) and he answered "yeah we could say that lol". Then, it became a running gag between us on the web, and we met for the first time at a french convention called Japan Tours, the 2015 one. So yeah, I think it was when I was... 20/21 years old, something like that.

Question: It's okay. We've all been cringe at some point in their lives. Did you two meet up again after the convention?

Answer: Yup. In fact, after the convention, he sent me a friend request on Facebook. Then, we chatted for a bit and he asked me if I wanted to be a model for him, and I met him for the second time during that model session.

Question: How did Thomas approach you about creating a character in his show based on you?

Answer: So, it was after I modeled for him. It happened after S1 has ended, so when we were chatting, he asked me which one was my favorite character. I answered Nathaniel, because at this time I felt quite close to this one (we love the angsty artist boy lmao). He told me that he didn't understand people liking Nath because he found it was a very empty character aha, but then he told me that they were searching for inspiration to create a boyfriend for him. He told me he wanted the persons to be happy that he got a boyfriend and that they would “stop bothering him with Nathaniel”, and as he wanted to take inspiration on someone looking androgynous he thought I was a good inspiration, so I accepted.

Question: Interesting story. Didn't know Nathaniel was so popular before Season 2. Did you have any input in the creation of Marc in terms of stuff like his design or personality?

Answer: Yeah he rather was, I remember a lot of people wanted to see more of him ehe. Not at all, I even though that he was joking on the moment, then one day he sent me Marc's characters sheet. I had the same haircut back in the day. Also, I was always wearing armor rings and I was wearing those kind of rings when I had this conversation with him, and he told me that Marc was going to have one of those as his miraculous. I was also still writing a lot back in the days, so I guess he still did took some stuff there and there in my personality to create him.

Question: You mean this design?

Answer: Yup! I was wearing only black sooo yeah the red and rainbow wasn't in my wardrobe aha.

Question: Do you know why they made the design rainbow themed?

Answer: Nah, he didn't told me :/ My guess is to make him more LGBT+ themed...

Question: Okay, sorry. Next question: What are your thoughts on Marc as a character? What do you think of his relationship with Nathaniel and his respective villain and hero forms, Reverser and Rooster Bold?

Answer: To be honest, when he first appeared, I really liked him. I thought he had a lot of potential as a character, his villain form was really cool and I really liked the ideas behind him, and I liked the relationship that he got with Nathaniel, from enemies to associates ehe. But after that... meh. There wasn't nothing much on the LGBT+ relationship with Nathaniel (we had to wait until the end of season 5 to see them hold hands... wow), and I didn't really find myself anymore in his character. I liked the design of his hero form and I liked the concept of his power, but like the other heroes that appeared during this episode, we didn't see Rooster Bold that much and I think that doesn't really make him feel appealing. I have the feeling that Marc and many other side characters could be way more develop in very cool subthemes but this is never really done in the series. Instead, now, they are just the characters getting out a whiteboard and giving terrible ideas to Marinette for her to date Adrien =="

Question: Just for fun, do you have any personal headcanons for Marc?

Answer: Well of course ehe, I have ton of those :D

Mmmh... For example, I think he is a dog person, that he's also fond of fashion such as Marinette but that he just don't have the patience to learn how to draw and how to design clothes... Also have the headcanon that him and Nath often meet at one of their places to do some little workshops together to work on their series and on tons of other projects :D

Got also tons of headcanon for future!Marc, such as him being a model for lgbt+ brands and Nath designing his clothes, I would love to see this shy patootie being at the front of the spotlight ehe, full of confidence and all :D There's tons of ideas to have with this character, I remember when I saw lots of artists drawing him with alternate clothes back in the day, such as shishitsunari or hazy (will try to find them back but it's been a while lol). I wish those clothing styles would be canon, with Marc rocking those kind of genderless clothes.

Links to fanart of Marc with different outfits: (https://www.deviantart.com/hazydayclouds/art/72918-756895643) and (https://ladyofacat.tumblr.com/post/176231424098/rises-from-the-underworld-marc-is-perfect-i-want)

Question: This one's a little tough, so if you don't want to answer, that's perfectly fine. What exactly went down before Thomas blocked you? Did you have any conversation online or in real life regarding the use of the Rising Sun Flag in "Ephemeral", or did Thomas just block you with no warning?

Answer: Honestly ? Blocked me without any warning. We were talking less and less, and, since I have affective dependancy, I had the feeling that I said / done something wrong. He was often answering only when I was defending him on social medias during these times. But we didn't have any harsh conversation from what I recall. So, I did the tweet about ephemeral, pointing out the use of the rising sun flag, and, well, maybe he had a plugin on twitter that blocked everyone using the term "flag", and maybe it blocked me automatically. The thing is : he has my number, he has my address (well, my old address now, lol). He had many ways to tell me this was a misunderstanding and that he didn't want to block me. He didn't call me, didn't send me any text after that to talk about it, so he clearly didn't want to make anything to sort out the problem. To this day, he still hasn't send me any message to talk about it. He commented on some of my facebook posts I did last year (I posted some makeups I did for my school) just saying it was cool, so... Yeah, not the type of friend I want to keep. I still have him as a friend on FB if I ever get the guts to try to send him a message to tell him everything that was wrong towards me and towards other people, but I clearly have other things to deal with lately.

Question: So he blocked you and didn't say anything else?

Answer: Yup, exactly, blocked me and didn't say anything else :/ After years of supporting him lmao.

Question: I'm really sorry to hear that. And you still haven't heard from him after all this time?

Answer: Well, apart from some comments he made on my facebook posts (I posted my makeup from my makeup school and he commented "very nice!") nothing at all. But honestly I'm not too bothered by that. I heard new stuff that he did prior and I really don't think it's a good idea that I interact with him again. I keep him in my facebook friends because maybe one day I'll send him a message to try to confront him, telling him that he had a very terrible behavior towards me and other people... But not today, I have other stuff to deal with.

Question: Despite everything that's happened between you and Thomas, do you still keep up with Miraculous Ladybug? If so, what do you think of it?

Answer:

Well, I've kept up with it because I still have lots of friends who are watching it (for example Octolady, Kogenta and Candy...), and they help me keep a little hype.

So I watched the episodes... There are some stuff that I like. There's good LGBT+ representation, and I like seeing an international known cartoon doing that (especially a french one since we have lots of far-right rising lately).

But honestly, I don't have the same hype as before. At the beginning, I was hyped because S1 looked awesome and had lots of cool fights, lots of wholesome characters and all, but the animation problems and differences are really making me bothered. Also, I have the feeling there's a lot of characters who could be more elaborated and who aren't, and... That's kinda sad, because there's a lot of topics that could be explored thanks to them and not just brushed off in one episode.

Plus, to be honest, I didn't really like the ending of S5. And I don't like the idea of it going on for seasons and seasons and seasons, milked until there's nothing more for it. The fewer the better in my mind...

I also seen the movie and didn't really liked it. Too much fanservice and didn't really made sense. The animation was nice, though.

Honestly, I love the writing team, they are wholesome people and they are doing their best for this show, but people like Thomas and Zag are the kind of people I don't want to support anymore. So yeah... To sum it up : still watching it from afar to see if nice stuff is happening, been pleased with some little stuff, displeased with a lot more, but I don't think I'll keep watching it both because I'm not that hyped up anymore and because I don't want to support anymore these 2 people. I supported Thomas too much before, was too attached to him and was a terrible person towards fans who didn't deserved it because I was too blind, so yeah, won't happen anymore.

Still, I'm glad there's still some people who are fans of Marc and who felt helped thanks to this character. I really hope he will have a better representation in the future (clear relationship with Nath, maybe even some trans / non-binary representation ?) in order to inspire young people.

----------------------------------------------------------

I'd like to personally thank Hope for being willing to answer my questions, and I highly reccommend giving their Instagram a follow.

[tinkerbelle05]

~Pretty in Pink~

Characters:Jaime Reyes x Fem!reader

Genre: Fluffy

Summary: (Requested) Thanks for the request, and I am so, so sorry this is late! 🎀

Request: Can you write a Jaime Reyes fic where he has a bimbo gf. Like she's just so bubbly, pink, soft, ykyk but she has like no filter and is a little on the slow side. I just wonder what their relationship would be like. She'd totally leave her hyperfeminine stuff at his place and his sister would just tease the living hell outta him! That would literally be so cute! Thnx pookie!

Warnings: Slight suggestive things but nothin too crazy

Jaime’s Bimbo GF

You two met while he was on campus. He saw you at some event, welcoming the freshman or something like that. He couldn’t remember, but he remembered you. Decked out in everything pink, you were beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. He wanted to talk to you. To introduce himself to you. To get to know you.

He was positive there was a beautiful soul underneath that beautiful face.

And he was right.

You were kind, funny, smart. And so much more. Though, you had a nasty habit of saying things that first came to your mind.

You’d have Jaime laughing with the observations (at times verging on insults) you’d give to people.

“Why his butt out like that? Dude can afford Jordan’s but not a belt?”

And…

“I don’t get people that go bare face but have a 10 inch lashes on? If your gonna do all of that, then at least but some blush on. Some lipgloss at least, jeez.”

At times, you don’t understand that you are being rude or mean. To you, you were just pointing out the obvious.

Speaking of makeup though…

You wore it. Lots of it. Of course you’d be wearing pink but you would switch it up. Though the color would always be bright and colorful. You weren’t a pastel type of gal.

You would force Jaime to be your personal bag carrier when you go on shopping sprees to the mall. His limit was 5 bags per hand, even when you begged. He cheered you up with some boba and ice cream though.

Eventually, most of your stuff was in his room. Your scattered clothes in his dorm room and your make up items all over his dresser and bathroom counter.

And obviously this habit of yours carried over to when you and Jaime went home for spring break. It was a pleasant surprise that the both of you lived in the same state, nevermind the same city.

Which leads to…

“Jaime Reyes, get here right now!” Jaime heard his mother, Bianca yell at him.

Jaime ran over to his mother fast, the urgency in her voice had him thinking the worst; maybe there was a spider or a robber

Or…

A pair of lacy pink panties she held in the air. At the sight of the panties, Jaime froze in his place.

His speechlessness didn’t faze his mother at all as she gazed sternly at him, “Explain. Now.”

After an hour of interrogation, Bianca demands to meet you. Your charming personality and softness was welcomed, especially since she was fearing the worst when she saw the lacy underwear.

His family loves you, and you were a permanent figure in their household l. Spending holidays with them and hanging out in general.

But back to you and Jaime tho…

He’ll let you put make up on him. Just ONCE. And there could be no photos or anything. These were the terms you two agreed upon after you begged and nagged him for months about it.

Somehow though, Milagro managed to somehow take a picture (Jaime thinks it’s her evil sister powers) and now she will never let him forget it.

Even when he thinks that she had forgotten all about it, she’ll stare at him and say, “You looked so cute with that blush. What was its name again?”

Tags: @alienstardust, @scryarchives, @asvterias, @marmar-c, @wintersdeadd, @fhhahaha12, @allthingsvicf, @niluuuuu, @starii-light, @louiesdaydream, @666kpopfan, @sodacatz, @bluecray0nn, @strawberrycreamb, @conicoroahre, @losingmywayyyy, @nightwingandhissquad, @shslsimpette, @dilflover-3, @dcnerd98, @renamiel, @tid4lwave, @17ppm3, @fullsiiner, @zerosinterweb, @devilslittlehelper

Taglist, & Masterlist, & Reqs Info

[pigeonpeach]

I got a chase of baby fever so allow me to ramble for a bit about genshin men being girldads

Neuvillette first of all already is a girl dad, but the addition of his biological daughter is welcomed! That child will have many melusines to play with and too look after her. He trusts they will ensure her wellbeing and he is right to do so! The melusines love their new friend!

Wriothesley would LOVE playing tea tome with his daughter. Perhaps he brews a actual tea for her (one that is uncaffeinated). Only problem is his butt is too big for the tiny chairs and tiny table but he will not let that stop him from being a better father than he ever had!

Ayato I can see letting his daughter rest on his lap as she looks over his work like she understands a single kanji on the page. (Fun fact kids love to mimic their parents) i think if he saw her pretending to be like him and setting up her own little area and pretending to review papers and sign stuff he’d struggle to compose himself

Thoma who’s daughter often follows him around on cleaning duty. She’s more than welcomed to go play but she likes to spend time with him, and hey he’s no complaining. Any time is a good time to learn how to clean after all. But he’s also aware of the fact that sometimes she will purposely make a mess just so they have something to clean together. He thinks its too cute to scold her for but he swears he will eventually

Zhongli is already so father coded its insane! Needless to say he’d be a excellent father! His patience is unmatched! Contrary to popular belief i don’t think he’d spoil her but he would if she’s good. Perhaps offering little contracts like ‘if you clean all the floors once a week for a month we’ll get you some new toys’. If failed he isn’t too harsh just a little stern and nothing more. Afterall they are just a wee baby. Cloud retainer is definitely their aunty tho. Imagine going to school and finding our your schoolmate goes to the fucking adepti for the holidays

Tartaglia is def the best for any wild child (good chance theyll be orange so high energy is almost guaranteed)! He is the spoiler kind (just look at teucer) and absolutely would love to spend time with them. I can just invision the first day he’s home on family leave and his daughter is tightly wrapped around his leg refusing to budge as he makes a show of how easily he can still lift his leg and making sound effects as they stomp over to the kitchen! He’d be very protective of her however, definitely only leaves the best and most trustworthy to watch over her when he isn’t there.

A/n: That’s all for now but sorry for the lack of posting! I hsve a job now and it’s exhausting! I’ll try to at least publish something like twice or something a month but I’ve been dry in terms of creativity for writing recently

[the-s1lly-corner]

Could you do the TADC cast x reader with a really heavy southern accent?

TADC cast x reader w/ a heavy southern accent!

hello i am back from my silly little lunch break i made a sandwich it was very yummy i need to find a new set of music to listen to while typing, as much as i love jack stauber i think im going to go insane if i hear baby hotline one more time... oddly enough not the first time that specific song has driven me nuts from being overplayed anyways idk side note idk what to do with gifs because i keep running out of TADC gifs and i got a reblog months back on a crp post that implies that gif makers get notified when you use their gifs?? is that true?? if so i am so so so sorry to the tadc gif makers TToTT also still gif related but i keep getting. jumpscared by butts n boobs anytime i open the gif thing i cannot keep doing this!!!!

CAINE:

i think he would find it pretty, like, i dont know how to explain it! i think he would possibly mimic some of your speech mannerisms. probably gives you a cowboy hat. i dont know what it is but i think southern accents, at least from what ive seen, is one of the most romanticized of american accents... maybe its the whole rugged cowboy thing thats commonly associated with it. what im trying to say that i think caine would romanticize it the same way, thanks to him not really having the experience of going out and interacting with people from the south

he finds the accent pretty

POMNI:

i dont think she would really notice it unless she is really trying to pay attention to what you say. but maybe thats just self projection because i myself dont really notice other peoples accents unless its very prominent, or they say something that sounds so different to how im used to hearing things. i feel it would be the same with pomni, but i dont think she would treat you any differently! wish i had more ideas but pomni and gangle are particularly hard for me to write for some reason

RAGATHA:

honestly i like to hc that she grew up in a southern small town before getting stuck in the digital world, but of course she wouldnt remember it... perhaps she would feel some sense of familiarity around you anyways, even if she cant pin down why.. i think that would be nice... she likes listening to you talk

JAX:

writing these out of order, but i think jax would be similar to caine in the regard that he would tease some of your speaking mannerisms. "yaint! yall'd've!" stuff like that... which... i can be mad about because im from the south and the two examples are in my vocabulary... hes not really saying anything thats incorrect, at least in my case

probably asks why your digital form isnt a cowboy, shit eating grin on his face

KINGER:

thinks it sounds nice! for once i dont have any ideas for kinger, which sucks because i love kinger TToTT

your words probably rub off on him, i can see him probably picking up on some of your terms n slang

kinger saying yall isnt real he cant hurt you

kinger saying yall:

ZOOBLE:

similar to pomni they dont notice until theyre forced to notice.. no but imagine your accent becomes more pronounced when you get mad, you start saying more stereotypically southern stuff that people associate. probably does a double take if you say a rather insane variant of 'yall' but otherwise doesnt see much point in pointing it out

GANGLE:

absolutely loves hearing you talk, similar to ragatha! while ragatha clings onto your words thanks to unknown familiarity, gangle just thinks your voice sounds like and soothing, comforting! i dont know what it is but hearing someone trying to comfort you with a heavy southern accent as well as using casual terms of endearment (whether you see this as romantic or platonic is up to you!) in this soft tender voice just always hits different for me. maybe i am guilty of also romanticizing southern accents

[halloweenbitch2764]

Broken Home | Bo Sinclair x Reader

TW: Abuse

A/N: This is the reboot of my original series titled the same. This one is going to be better, I think, so thank you for reading!

Chapter One

I gripped the steering wheel until my knuckles turned white. I was terrified, angry, and overall hurt. I questioned why it happened to me but prayed it was a gift in disguise. Being optimistic wasn't easy, but it would be the only way I would get through this alive.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I drove the deserted road, occasionally glancing at my map to try to navigate where I needed to go. My stuff was thrown haphazardly in the backseat, and my immediate needs were in the passenger seat. Things like my map, my purse, and so on.

I had a plan. I was heading to my hometown of Ambrose. Silent prayers filled my head as I hoped who I wanted to see still lived there. I hadn't seen him or his family since I was a little girl.

Bo. Bo Sinclair. To others, he was a menace, but to me, he was a protector. A memory came flooding back as I thought back to him.

I was young, probably about five or six, and I was being picked on while playing alone outside. I was shy when I was young and usually kept to myself. For some reason, a boy around my age had decided to pick on me. My mom swore it was because he simply had a crush on me, but I didn't buy it. Whatever the reason, he started throwing dirt and small rocks at me. I had tried getting away, but he cornered me. I fell on my butt and scrambled back.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing!?" A voice sounded behind him. Clearly, someone that was our age. The boy whipped around and dropped the rocks he had in his hand. "S-Sorry!" Was all the boy squeaked out before running away. I looked to see who it was and saw it was Bo Sinclair.

Bo was known to be a bully in his own right. He had a temper and was extremely protective of his siblings. He wasn't afraid of a fight. "And don't bother her again!" He yelled as the boy ran off. He offered me a hand, and I took it, standing up and brushing the dirt off my clothes.

"Are you okay?" He asked. "Yeah, I-I'm okay. Thank you." I replied and smiled shyly. He nodded and smiled brightly. "What's your name?" He pried. "Y/N L/N. Who are you?" I already knew, but it was only polite to ask in return. "Bo Sinclair." He said and grinned. "Oh, your mom owns the Wax Museum, right? And your dad's a doctor?" He nodded.

That moment was the catalyst of a fantastic friendship. He was protective of me, and I was never picked on in a mean way again. He, of course, picked on me, but it was always in a playful manner, so I didn't mind. I became sort of friends with Vincent and knew of Lester (he was too little to really be friends with). Vincent tended to be with his mom, helping her with the Museum.

Bo and I grew older together. He even became my childhood crush. But one day, the Sugar Mill went out of business. My parents were out of work, and that meant we had to move. I hated the idea. I wanted to stay with Bo. I begged my parents to let me stay, but I didn't have a choice.

When the day came for me to leave, I cried. I didn't want to leave Bo, leave the only town I'd ever known. I grabbed one of my stuffed animals and gave it to Bo. He said he'd keep it forever, and we hugged one last time before I left. I cried on and off the whole ride to the new town.

A smile came to me as I remembered Bo being so protective of me. It was a nice memory in a moment of such anguish. Would Bo even remember me? Would he even still live in Ambrose? Thoughts swirled in my mind as I drove.

Reality set back in fairly quickly, reminding me I was not coming back on good terms. I was coming because I needed an escape and fast. My ex was after me. I knew that if he found me, I was likely dead. My foot pressed on the gas a bit harder.

I checked my map one more time before seeing the sign I remembered from all those years ago. "Trudy's House of Wax". I smiled despite the tears. I knew I was almost to Ambrose.

After a little more driving, I arrived in the town. I parked in front of the gas station and got out. I headed into the gas station. "Hello?" I called out but got no response. I stood still for a minute before hearing some muffled music. I stepped out of the gas station and followed the music to the church.

I took a breath and slowly pushed the door open. The pews were filled, and a man knelt in front of a casket. A preacher stood off to the side behind the casket. My eyes widened, and I quickly closed the door, not wanting to interrupt.

I groaned softly into my hands and brushed the hair from in front of my face. I was about to walk away when the door opened. I looked up to see a man. He grabbed a pack of cigarettes from his coat pocket and lit one before looking at me.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt. I'm actually looking for someone. Can you help?" The man nodded and took a drag. "His name is Bo Sinclair. I'm Y/N L/N, I know it's a long shot to even think he's still here, but -" His eyes widened. "Y/N...?"

[slamminslamminmcgill]

*me convincing you, like how a jester would entertain a king, into writing more boypussy insert fics about any hot dilf in your roster* “how is thou feeling now sire?!”

im feeling like i wanna get fucked in the ass so you’re getting joel and butt stuff have fun

warnings: anal, rimming, dp, ass to pussy (do not try this at home), toys, ass to mouth, poppers, daddy kink

anatomical terms: cunt/pussy

joel miller is an absolute buttslut

HOWEVER

only as a top. he will take any chance he gets to take his partners ass: with his tongue as it’s slipping and sliding all up and down your dripping slit, with his thumb as he takes your cunt doggystyle, or even with his own cock busting you open for him

but he will never let you reciprocate. you can beg all you like,

“man, it’s not fair, this is bullshit. how come you can play with my ass but i can’t play with yours?”

“because i’m a top and you’re a needy little cocksocket.”

welp. can’t argue with that. the more you tease him about it, though, the more time he thinks it over. he doesn’t like rewarding brats, but eventually he gives.

“y’know what? fine. you got five minutes. make ‘em count, cause y’aint touchin’ my ass again.”

that turns out to be a lie bc uh oh surprise surprise it feels good

and from then on he loves it and will take the initiative.

you’ll be on your knees getting throatfucked by him and then he rips you off, spins around, and shoves your face in his ass with no warning. you try to push back bc you’re caught off guard, and he says,

“what? ain’t this whatcha wanted, boy? you’d been begging me all this time to lick my ass. well, now i’m givin’ it to ya. c’mon, whore. do your job. stick your tongue up my ass.”

you start licking, lapping at his rim like a dog, and he lets out a rich gravelly, rumbly moan from deep in his chest

“yeeaaahhh, that’s it… good boy… oh, you dirty fuckin’ bitch…”

pegging him is still a bridge too far for him. BUT i think he’ll let you try out beads/plugs on him. also fingering him during a blowjob will have him going crazy.

i know in my heart that this man is PACKING meat. DISRESPECTFULLY hung. which means getting him in your ass can be a bit of an ordeal. but, being the caring, attentive guy he is, he’ll take his sweet time prepping you. he works you open with his fingers (or maybe a plug) and lots of lube. you’re Very slippery once it’s go time. still, though, it’s gonna be tough to get him in.

he hands you a bottle of poppers and tells you,

“take as much as you need, pumpkin. it’ll help open you up for me.”

once you huff enough, he’ll ask, “ready?”. you nod, and he starts pushing in. you wince, naturally, but he’s there to talk you through it.

“i know. i know, baby. it’s okay. you can take it. you can take it… let daddy in, yeah, there you go… look at you, you’re takin’ it so good. daddy’s so proud of you, little guy.”

he’ll start slowly, letting you adjust to the feeling of him in your ass, and once you relax enough, maybe after a few more popper hits, he’ll really get going. he’ll spank you, shove a few fingers in your pussy for some dp action, the works.

sometimes just for shits and giggles, he’ll pull out, spin you around, slap your face with his cock, and say,

“clean your ass off my cock, slut.”

because he has to use a lot of lube on you, you’re VERY slippery. it’s entirely possible that he’ll slip into your pussy on accident. you yelp, and he stops immediately.

“shit. sorry, darlin’. should i-?”

you know it’s bad. you know better. but, fuck, your cunt is clinging to him, crying for some of the attention that your ass has been getting… fuck it.

“i-it’s fine! it’s fine, just-… just keep going, please!”

having been given the greenlight, he’ll just switch back and forth. one thrust in your pussy, then your ass, then your pussy, so on and so forth. it’s wrong. it’s nasty. you know you shouldn’t be doing it, but fuck, your head is swimming in pleasure, both holes a sloppy mess as you cum all over yourself over and over. whatever. you’ll just take some cranberry pills and hope tomorrow doesn’t bite you in the ass.

joel WILL finish in your ass. that’s non-negotiable. if you let him in your ass he’s GOING to breed it. he may also plug his load in you and have you sleep with it in. or go about the rest of your day depending on what time it is.

once he’s done though, he’s hugging you tight and stroking your hair. aftercare god.

“good boy… did so good for daddy… ‘m so proud, baby…”

eventually you have to nudge him off so you can go pee (it’s called harm reduction 😌) but when you’re done you settle back into his arms and it’s like you never left 🖤

[danurso]

Sweet retribution

Yang: *kicks door open* Guys! I cracked the code!

Blake: *Reading on her bed* Oh, did you finally learn how to make good jokes?

R___/_NPR: *snort*

Yang: Ha ha, very funny, but you can't improve what's already perfect, can you?

Blake: *rolls eyes*

Ruby: Is that Weiss' cheesecake?

Yang: *with a little bit of cake on hand* . . . . . . .*shoves everything in her mouth* Doesn't matter! I need sugar to think! Now please focus on the matter here!

Ruby: Okay. . . . .what are you talking about then?

Yang: I'm talking about why Weiss is always getting late for stuff and disappearing for no reason!

Pyrrha: But we already know why, she's been overlooking the new SDC filial here in vale, she even registered us so we always get a big discount on anything there.

Yang: Well, that's actually just a front! It's what she wants us to believe she does!

Ruby: And why would she need to do that?

Yang: It's because she's hiding a huuuuuge secret!

Blake: Which is?

Yang: She's dating Jaune!!!

R___/_NPR: . . . . . .pfffhahahahaha

Nora: HAH! Blake, you're such a liar! Her jokes are great!

Yang: Why are you guys laughing!? I'm serious!

Ren: Well, forgive us if we were rude but. . . . .do you really believe that?

Yang: I saw them kissing at the docks yesterday!

Ruby: You mean after you came back pretty late from Junior's?

Yang: Yeah.

Blake: So let me get this straight. You, after a good few hours of drinking, came back when it was quite dark and saw a couple kissing in the distance, and you assumed it to be Jaune and Weiss?

Yang: It was them! It had to be them! I……i was a bit far but i'm sure it was them.

Nora: It would need to be a cooooold day in hell for Ice queen to even think about doing something like that.

Ruby: Yang, you know how much Weiss dislikes Jaune, i really thought they were going to get closer but there's no fixing how much she dislikes him.

Ren: Last time they were on amicable terms was during the previous vale carnival we all went together. . . .that was a year ago.

Blake: The closest I've seen those two lately is when She orders him to carry her things.

Pyrrha: *brows furrowed* He dropped one of her bags a few days ago and she kicked him in the butt. I'm sorry Yang, but I find it quite impossible that they are in such a relationship.

Yang: Well. . . .when you put it like that. . . .*sigh* Maybe I ended up getting one too many.

Weiss: *walks in* Oh good, you're all gathered here, saves me the trouble.

Nora: What's up Ice queen?

Weiss: Professor Goodwitch asked me to warn everyone that the cantina is having a special sweet day. They're serving Cakes, Parfaits, Pies, Pancakes, Cookies-

Ruby/Nora: *Zoom out the door*

Weiss: Aaaaand *looks at the clock* Seven seconds, honestly I thought they would be out by the time I said cake.

Pyrrha: Is this really today? We didn't receive any notification about it.

Weiss: It was supposed to be a surprise for the holidays, but the intern that was supposed to notify everyone messed up and busted the system trying to fix it, so professor Goodwitch has been asking students to notify their teams and colleagues about it.

Pyrrha: I see. Well, I could use some cake right now.

Blake: Been awhile since i got a parfait.

Ren: We better hurry before Ruby and Nora eat everything.

Pyrrha/Ren/Blake: *hurry out*

Yang: You don't look too excited

Weiss: I don't really have that much of a sweet tooth, most of the time i like to enjoy a bit of cheesecake which they unfortunately aren't serving today. I haven't had some in awhile, given how every time I buy some, it ends up disappearing.

Yang: *sweating* R-really? what a bummer.

Weiss: It's not a big deal. Now, what were you all talking about? I believe I heard my name being mentioned before I entered the room.

Yang: Oh, that, well. . . . .i thought I saw You and Jaune kissing yesterday, I was sure it was you two but I guess I drank a bit more than I should. You would never kiss Jaune of all pe-

Weiss: Oh, it was us.

Yang: . . . . . .wait, what?

Weiss: You didn't see anything wrong, he asked for a last kiss before going back to his room and I complied.

Yang: A "last"!?!? You two are dating!?!?

Weiss: Yes. It's going to be a year next month I believe. *Pulls out scroll, showing her a picture* This is during our first date, a week after the carnival where Jaune asked me out after winning me a polar bear plushie, he was so nervous that he only stopped stuttering halfway through it. *Swipes* This is the day i got covered with flour trying to make him a special meal, him being the sweetheart that he is, helped me clean everything up and guided me through the cooking. *Swipes* This is on a ferris wheel near his home after we had dinner with his family.

Yang: You met his family!?!?

Weiss: Of course, quite delightful people they are. I was not exactly pleased by how his parents thought i was a paid actress because their son quote "Could never get someone this beautiful to fall for him", but once that passed, it was great, his sisters were lovely and shared many interesting stories with me. *Swipes* This one was on the day we supposedly missed out the last flight back to beacon. We spent a day in the park, took several pictures in one of those booths that he quite likes, and as the sun started to set, we went to a nearby motel where we. . . . .i believe the slang you would use to describe it is "Swapped V-cards"

Yang: *chokes* You wha-!?!?

Weiss: It's been somewhat of a bumpy road so far, it took him awhile not to get nervous when I'm around, and also for me to learn how to do traditional "girlfriend" stuff for him, but I'm quite happy, this relationship honestly couldn't be better.

Yang: So you two really are dating. . . .HA! I KNEW IT!!! I WOULD NEVER DRINK TO THE POINT OF SEEING THINGS LIKE THAT!!! I KNEW IT!!!

Weiss: *smiling* Yes, you figured it out.

Yang: THEY SAID I WAS SEEING THINGS BUT I KNEW THAT. . . .that. . . . .wait a minute, why are you telling me all of this? With this much detail even?

Weiss: Because I know for a fact, my dear friend, that no matter how many times you repeat, or how many times you swear, scream, shout and yell the truth towards the others. *sinister look* No one will believe a word you say~

Yang: . . . . . . .*jaw drops*

Weiss: Now, if you excuse me, I'll take this little break from our friends and spend some quality time with my boyfriend. See you later Yang~

Yang: YOU EVIL MONSTE-!!!!

*Slam*

Weiss: . . . . . .*chuckles, holding the door closed*

Jaune: You really did it, didn't you?

Weiss: Of course I did. No one steals my cheesecake and gets away with it.

Jaune: *chuckles* If that's what you do with someone that steals something small like a cheesecake, I don't even want to know what you'd do if it was something more important. That's going to make her crawl up the walls.

Weiss: We're going clean on our anniversary in a few weeks anyways, let her deal with that for a bit.

Jaune: Alright. You're going to the cantina?

Weiss: Depends. Are you going?

Jaune: Don't think so. I quite literally got my ass kicked to help on a certain Ice queen's revenge plan so I was thinking that sitting on my soft bed would be nicer. I did just make a fresh cheesecake so I can enjoy it in peace, it's just sad that it's too big just for me to eat.

Weiss: Well, i suppose i could help you with that, if you allow me to accompany you?

Jaune: Are you going to kick me again?

Weiss: *chuckles* I just might if you keep talking, silly.

Jaune: *holds her close* Well, i think i found a way to shut it, just gotta be sure it works. *Leans down, capturing her lips in a warm kiss*

Weiss: *kisses him back for a few moments before pulling away* Huh, it works afterall.

Jaune: I'm not sure yet, can i try again?

Weiss: Cheesecake first, depending on how good it tastes I might give you a sizable reward.

Jaune: Then be my guest snow angel. *Takes her hand, guiding her to his room.* And Weiss?

Weiss: Yes?

Jaune: Yang is going to be fine, right?

Weiss: Relax, I'm sure she will be alright.

*A few hours later*

Ruby: . . . . .Yang.

Blake: What in the world is going on?

Yang: Look! I know this is gonna sound really crazy! But just hear me out here!

[ghxst-system]

The systems misusing nonverbal and semiverbal upset me so much. We are bodily semiverbal. We have difficulty communicating and it's only worsened by our dissociation and schizospec stuff. We have many alters that are semiverbal and even have alters formed specifically to help communicate sometimes because we seriously cannot. And even then sometimes they fail to communicate for us.

It makes us upset seeing systems and anyone misuse them. We are dumb and we are slow. We have cognitive and mental disabilities. We struggle to think and understand a lot. And even we know that if we do not fully understand words that we do not feel comfortable using them.

It very easy to just not use words or to learn about them. Even as a ramcoa survivor and polyfrag system we still don't use subsystem because we cannot fully understand it. And it's okay to not understand. Sometimes it takes months before we use words and understand them. It takes us a while of learning between reading actual professional resources and personal experiences to understand. We still don't understand some of our own stuff. We still can't talk about schizotypal stuff even though we very much live it.

Feels like people see words and just go "Oh that me!" and don't even try to understand. Or try to understand what means beforehand. And cannot relate to that because always been scared about not understanding or misusing words so always try to make sure I understand best I can before using them. Because I know I can be very slow if not easily written out like a vocab word in elementary school. It takes time for us to use words to describe our own experiences because along with time accepting it, it takes time to even understand it. Like we know we polyfrag and ramcoa now, but took us months to learn and just as if not longer to accept. Because could not understand and comprehend.

I thought everyone would do this kind of thing. Look at professional sources and then try to understand them and also find people to help explain or people that experience it. And we are notoriously bad at research and stuff cause we are very slow and dumb. Does make us slightly salty about it though. But I know most people never mean harm. Still frustrating and hope more systems try to learn before hopping on using words especially when many are professional and medical words, not just community terms for funsies. They have meaning. They have purpose. They exist for reason. Meaning sticks to meaning.

(sorry for longer vent and sorry for if not word right cuz as we said we are dumb and semiverbal and struggle to communicate so tried to get thoughts out and stuff. Apologizing because very anxious and helps feel better if say sorry.)

But this just to say yes very frustrating and very glad someone says it. Semiverbal for semiverbal bodily. Nonverbal for nonverbal bodily. Permanent state. Not something go to. Important for these words to keep meaning when most of community already ignored nonverbal and semiverbal people. :( Systems too. Do not use nonverbal and semiverbal. Leave for systems that bodily nonverbal and bodily semiverbal just as they'd be for non-systems that are nonverbal and semiverbal.

(really hope made sense, always worry come off wrong, been treated poor for semiverbal struggles before :( sorry if too venty)

Hey you have no need to apologise!

I'm really grateful you resonated with this as a system who's also semiverbal bodily.

I just want to say, you aren't at all dumb okay? I hope you can learn to feel better about yourself and your disabilities and verbality

(Sorry for reply being short CFS is kicking our butt rn)

[sharonisthebettercarter]

Thinking about what you said, I think it's highly probable Madelyn Stillwell raped Homelander when he was 14 or 15.

That's around the age he got stuck at, right?

I think fandom is probably right about her doing it as more of a means to control him than anything, but I think you're probably right about this making it worse and meaning she did much more than has been shown to us on screen.

Regardless, I think this would have to be the case and I would say is even implied, but you are absolutely right that it shouldn't matter why someone decides to be a child molester.

They're still a child molester and whatever reasoning they have, the act is still vile and inexcusable. There even being debate on that in fandom just seems like grooming apologism and abuse dismissal because of favoritism towards Madelyn.

But the results and actions are ultimately the same in the end. It's also implementing a clause to make it mutually exclusionary when it could very well be both.

In the final scene, she swears to him that she loves him but is afraid of him and Homelander thanks her for finally being honest with him before killing her.

What if she was being honest or at least believed her own words when she said she loved him?

And the other scenes between them never struck me as a one time deal or the first time something like them happened. He does look off put in some ways and not quite uncomfortable, but almost like he's regressing when he's with her. Like she maybe used to do that sort of stuff more frequently and hasn't lately.

The scene where they're finally together struck me as more regression too. He immediately apologized to her and she consoled him like it was something that has happened before and she was used to it from him. Even the words she used and the way she said it and the way things were.

"My special sweet boy." "You did good." "That was so lovely."

Do people really believe this or similar can't have happened before with the things she says? To me, they indicate the exact opposite of that thought.

The scene looked almost like it was his first time, and obviously not hers. But the only way that really makes sense is if he is experiencing a moment of regression, possibly to his actual first time with her.

The scene feels like mother and son incest after years of abuse where she's deliberately causing his regression and enjoying the power it gives her over him.

She's a predator and this to me is made pretty clear if not explicit.

OOOH~<3! my darling anon, i wish i could fucking kiss you<3!

you just put into a word exactly why i could never get behind the homewell ship or the homewell type elements being used in other ships in fics that were supposedly trying to *heal* him. easy way to get me to check out for a fic because you *CANNOT* use elements from someone's trauma and abuse, legit full on *exploit* them, and *then* dare to call it or frame it as *healing* and expect it all to be hunky dory, that is just not how that shit works. (at least speaking in terms of medical accuracy/no wonder this shit is so triggery for me, this ain't supposed to be fuckin' disney--)

obliviously or dismissively predatory, so not even in the fun way...

and i want to be clear here, because this isn't me trying to tell people to not like the ship or elements or stop making content for them or whatever the fuck else. i don't care if people have or indulge in toxic guilty pleasure ships or stories here and there (literally have my own), but i always think we should be self aware of our own shit (plus ranting is sometimes good for the soul~<3) and it really *really* shows some people just are not in this case.

i *also* know people don't always mean to set up that way, part of it is a major problem with society (i will get to that~) and the only way for people to be aware is to be *made* aware, butt~

"--you think love is to prey, but i'm sorry i don't pray that way!"

"once i ran to you, now i run from you, this tainted love you've given--"

1000% correct. madelyn, regardless of what happened *off screen* between her and homelander, what we *did* see of her is enough to confirm her as a *predator*, and this was *before* diabolical added to the story behind them. she is extremely predatory as a character, set behind a narcissistic 'mother knows best' filter and a lot of it has nothing to do with homelander.

look no further than starlight~<3

this woman attempted to get a victim of rape to have 'discretion' about what happened to her, TO HER FACE. and every step of the way, tried to bully starlight into 'line' for the company. literally using narcissistic abuse--guilt tripping and shame, questioning her core values, fucking gaslighting (all things we see homelander copy oh deary me what an *odd* cowinkidink!! I WONDER WHERE HE LEARNED IT FROM.)--among others with a 'motherly' frame and 'it's just constructive criticism' (BITCH NO IT AIN'T!!) to manipulate her into doing what vought wanted/what was best for the *company*, NOT for annie.

hell, i'd wager she fucking hired starlight *specifically* because they thought she'd be an *easy* target.

she was *vulnerable*, nearly alone in that big city. her only relative/support system was an extremely religious mother who was *pushing her* to push through any pain or abuse and still wear a smile *for vought* and *for her* because of *fame* and *fortune*, framed as *for annie* when no it def wasn't. (i do like that starlight's mum actually becomes self aware of this and tries to amend the trust she broke, but i digress)

her tapes and everything they showed us about starlight showed us a wide eyed, bright eyed girl who was *hopeful*--but also naive... and as much as it pains me, that would have made her more susceptible to vought's machinations.

and i think the main reason annie didn't completely fall down the vought victims rabbit hole is in part due her truly good nature<3, but also because she met *hughie* (side note, notice how every time hughie and starlight have a falling out or separate from each other, they both start to get *worse*. butcher also tends to swoop in--)

it doesn't get talked about enough, but butcher pulls the same kind of bullshit with hughie (honestly probably why i could never quite feel right about butchie, do still like it but i do prefer it if butcher catches some guilty complexes causa hughie lmao), another good kid who's just had something monumentally traumatic happen to him and is in a super fucking vulnerable place where he'd be easy to manipulate for whatever it is butcher has planned.

he scoped him out and *saw* that, something to *use* to his advantage. and recruited him as such. like a gotdamn predator.

the wrench in his plans (as well as madelyn's) came in *hughie meeting annie* because they *gave* each other a solid support system because they were both good people, dealing with trauma, who found each other~<3 (always a hardcore hughielight shipper)

and butcher even *knows* this, he *knows* annie actually *honestly* and actually HELPS hughie and ruins his plots for him, so of course that mofo is gonna keep trying to ruin everything and break them up. if madelyn had ever discovered hughie, she probably would have done the same shit if in her own faux 'concerned mother' way.

BUTT... you are absolutely right in saying that fandom is highly dismissive or even apologist of what madelyn did to homelander (like they are with fuckin' everything that happened to him honestly) and it doesn't matter what reason she had to abuse him, what should be looked at is the fact of the matter.

did she abuse him? yes or no

the answer is yes, period. asking if she was actually attracted to him or just wanted control becomes a moot point after that, she *still* fucking groomed him. people can go ahead and debate the other factors, but the least they could do is acknowledge the first bit and not use the others to try and deny or 'lessen' the gravity of what she did.

i blame part of this on ableism and victim blaming, but also with how dismissive people *still* are when it comes to male victims of just about anything. christ, we still have people in fandom who have watched the show and *refuse*, not hyperbole, they downright *REFUSE* to acknowledge that homelander could have *any* semblance of victimhood whatsoever. despite the fact that he was literally tortured as a child and fucking groomed and we are given glimpses of these facts on screen, they'll deny any form of nuance and paint it as completely black or white, because he became... pretty much the only thing that fate allowed him to become.

that's not limited to this site even, it's prevalent pretty much in any part of the boys fandom across the web. (which is ironic given the series exists to challenge this sort of thinking)

but how often do we still see cases of a male *child* being sexually assaulted by an adult woman and the fucking judge going, "wElL sHe'S cAnDy So He PrObAbLy LiKeD iT"?

thankfully, not as often anymore. but if i'm honest? TOO FUCKING MANY (once is fucking too many) and the thought is still INSANELY pervasive. and again, it leads back to the question.

did she abuse him? yes or no

it doesn't fucking matter if the kid 'liked it' or not, MA'AM, THIS IS A FUCKING CHILD--

*children can NOT consent*

or in homelander's case, an emotionally stunted extremely mentally ill person. and ALSO a child at one point.

*likewise, mentally ill/special needs/disabled people and informed consent is an issue all its own. all of these are among the most vulnerable to abuse and the least likely to get justice for it*

if madelyn had been a man, nobody would question this. (who am i kidding, i'd like to think that but i am well aware there are apologists of all kinds that would not give a shit and be equally gross about it.)

and you are def right, it *feels* 1000% like *regression* in the scenes he's with her. and now that you mention it, the scene where they're together?? oh, fuck me. anon... that is *dark* and it fucking hurts but you may be right.

it *was* absolutely the first time *we* as an audience saw them together, and i think that may skew the perception about. there *was* absolutely an effort to regain control over him in that instance. but the things she said and the way it plays out... no

plainly, just no... it *does not* feel like the very first time that has happened... it feels like something that is *rare* between them. but definitely something that's happened *before*, and perhaps something she maintains as *rare* specifically to keep a hold on him. (could this be one reason for the diabolical episode?? to further implicate this?)

and even his use of doppelganger hinted at this cause think of it.

a 'madelyn' that is *just* for him, *only* the parts of her that... gave him attention, the bits he *liked*. what she more than likely fed to him as *scraps* to keep him crawling back for more. but because it was never genuine, the confusion from the ratio with abuse was thrown off, and the entire illusion that it ever meant anything was shattered prior (along with stormfront manipulating him), well...

"i give you all a boy could give you, take my tears and that's not nearly--"

down to his hatred and jealousy of teddy. we have to imagine what things were like before she had him but i get the feeling homelander got a lot more attention before then. it was well over 20 years and people honestly think in all that time *nothing* else happened??? things were 'normal' and then boom, *random* mommy kink??? hell, even the kid was maybe just as much a means to 'reset' the balance and help her maintain control as he was for future profit for vought.

OW.

yes. madelyn is a predator. homelander is her groomed victim. and i don't think it gets mentioned enough in this discourse, but one of the biggest reasons predators prey on the vulnerable or even want to make a fucking victim of someone is *because* of the power trip it gives them over that person. (hell, homelander fucking does this *specifically* because it has been done to him his entire life!)

and *even former abuse victims* may not realize it when they pull this sort of shit. i'm not gonna dive into that because it is a fucking *depressing* can of tapeworms, but let's just say i've been there, i know people who've been there, and i know people who know people who've been there. so this shit is a big fucking problem for people when we don't notice it and massively persistent circle jerk of perpetuation.

but it's still fucking predation, it doesn't make a difference if it's done by someone with power/control kink, narcissistic disorder or 'mommy/daddy dearest' vibes, pedophilic disorder, etc. it still fucking harmful and victimizes someone (especially when they are unaware/cannot consent to the powerplay OH FUCK--)

goddammit... i just realized the problem lmao... PISS. POOR. BDSM ETIQUETTE. GOTDAMN.

and trauma management i guess.

basically, people tag dom/sub or top/bottom when they should be tagging a 'control' or 'abuse kink'. dom/sub play relies on the informed consent of both parties while 'control' relies on the lack there of (informed consent) from the 'sub'. and in homelander's case, this shit is particularly bad. (readers need to be given informed consent too!! always tag yo shit y'all!!)

which to be fair, ain't exactly the fault of the ship itself, but more so the lack of awareness/common dismissal on it. it's really hella normalized/often advertised as 'just a quirky lil guy with a mommy kink' when that's not even remotely the only thing at play here and it goes way deeper and darker than that. you toss in homelander's other traumas and it's just... it's a goddamn mess.

and now i understand why i am so incredibly grossed out by fics that push homelander through more of this nonsense (or worse) with a new person (any person) and never bother addressing the trauma he has *directly* related to this shit. (because my traumas directly deal in the control shit yayyyyyyyyyyyyy~... UGH--)

well.

call me a pussy if you must (i am a pussy and a cunt and a dick and an asshole, i wear it shamelessly~<3) but i just ain't all that interested in fics that only exchange *handlers* for homelander instead of actually help him (when that's what they'll claim to want to do). seriously, lining him up with another 'madelyn' of all things just leaves me wishing he could *get away* from his shiny new abuser (because that is what she was, and would ideally be the inevitable outcome anyhow!)

homelander needs at least *one* honest *friend* who genuinely doesn't want anything from him to help him unblur the lines of informed consent that madelyn intentionally muddled *before* he can even make informed consent when it comes to this shit, especially if we wanna *actually* heal that boi (all he's had is more people capitalizing on it over and over if not just people with no clue of the minefield they were navigating)

he'd need to be able to experience true *independence* and *agency* before he decided they were things he actually wanted to put in someone else's hands or 'give up', so to speak, both of which would come *after* healing.

and if i'm indulging in toxicity with him, i'ma make him *get back at his abusers*~<3, give him a chance at some revenge porn for once and make it so much worse for *them*, not the guy who literally never had a chance or got to breathe his own breath (and def tagged properly of course).

but of all the whack ass takes i could see in the sea of fandoms, ANYONE in that position over this boi (or any character in similar situation) as he is *unhealed* is *NOT* his ally and doesn't give an honest shit about him, it's 100% all about *control* over him (which i know is a huge kink for tons of people and hypernormalized in society, especially heteronormativity, but again, trauma central for me so it'd be really fuckin' nice if people learned the difference and also started tagging this shit~<3)

fun for some, but not for me.

i've always generally preferred push/pull powerplay that purposely leaves the question of 'control' open/eventually balances it and helps empower and individualize both characters to be the best versions of themselves, i want them to learn and grow together. positive masculinity/femininity and emotional maturity are way more of a turn on for me and i want these bois and gurls and inbetweens to graduate to *men* and *women* and fairly *reasonable adults* when i write them, while preserving their core personalities and the things that make them *them*.

i also don't view 'bottomhood' as 'punishment'/something to use to deliberately rob a person of control/self determination (as much as we may joke about it, and also that is just rape with a pretty veil that at least deserves to be properly tagged) and i normally focus on empowering them just as much if not more than my tops so it's just damn weird to me to see that kind of mentality get popularized on any character and leik.

gotdamn, first off, what the shit, and second, i realize getting to the places i wanna go reasonably and responsibly takes hard work and pretty intricate writing but please lawd satan tell me i ain't the only one to feel this way, PLEASE!?

but very good point about it possibly being both/more than one element here. control is more likely to be *one* reason, but not *the* only reason and it could very well be a factor of both attraction and need to/getting off on the idea of controlling him (which still stems back to attraction, honestly, even if she didn't feel it towards him the sense of him being a child, it would still mean she feels it towards him in the sense of him being vulnerable which is just as awful, honestly.)

and i do think his stunted emotional maturity is 100% indicative that something *very* specific happened to him around that age (*maybe* she waited till after the debut??), but among all the other trauma, that is actually a question worth asking. why *then* and not any of the other times? he's got no shortage of trauma for his brain to pick from, so what the hell happened then?

as far as it feeling like incest? lil bit, yeah (if pseudo, which obviously we know it's not but i do think the vibe there is actually intended), suffice to say that madelyn is to homelander what billy's father was to him...

and y'know... i gotta admit, knowing this i am surprised we don't see all that much of butcher being shipped with his father because that and homewell are pretty much the same thing on opposite spectrums.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH--

have fun y'all, as always butt leik... have fun responsibly--gawddammit i never thought i'd be *that* old fart but i guess i am... well i can still be fun about it... tipsy bartender is fun lmao<3<3<3 (altho these subjects are decidedly less fun... *sigh of the long suffering*...)

[your-average-teenage-mess]

The first time I ever watched ride the cyclone, I was watching the slime tutorial on my phone with a friend, who's already watched it before. And when I saw Noel's character, I was legitimately prepared for pain.

Cool, a stereotypical gay teenager who's a drama queen and sex-obsessed and kind of annoying to everyone around him. Literally me, but he's gonna be turned into the butt of the joke we're somehow supposed to find empowerment in, right? He'll have his little moment of self-expression and pride, everyone around him will be embarrassed of how cringe it is and be framed as the normal ones, and we'll just have to take it because at least they aknowlaged the existence of gay teenagers. Very cool and not upsetting at all.

And then there was Noel's lament, and I was just like, "that's gonna be it, right? He's having his moment of expression, which he'll then be made fun of to hell and back for daring to be gay while expressing vulnerability". And I kept thinking, god this is beautiful, god do I relate, god am I so sorry for what's about to come. Because the thing is, I also experienced stuff not so different from what he went thorough. Being openly queer from a young age, everyone around you being cool with it on paper but also seeming to think you should stop being so weird, and so you try to keep it down, and be normal, and inside you turn to escapism, because all the heroes in all the stories had a better reason to feel hurt than you do, what are you complaining about, and you wish you were traumatized, because then all that pain and feeling of repression and preformence would not feel like you're just looking for attention even though you're trying to hold it back even though you CAN'T because you have no fucking filter, and... And right after Noel's lament ended, when he was just sitting there in hesitation, waiting to see how the others are going to respond to how he just poured his heart out, I just reached and paused the video, and I turned to my friend, and I went "just... Give me a second," because I wasn't ready to see another gay character I can relate to being degraded for having emotions that are messy.

And then she told me, "no, look," and unpaused the video, and... The other characters didn't act like he just humiliated himself. Mischa thought his performance and creativity were really dope! Ricky loved how he got to play the accordion for this, that was really cool! The only one who was being weird about it was Ocean, and she was presented as an annoying judgmental stuck-up who's trying a tiny bit too hard to seem like this doesn't make her uncomfortable, and was immediately side-eyed by literally everyone, as she should have been because for fucks sake that is how this is literally always like. He poured his heart out... And the story didn't punish him for it. It was genuinely radical for me to see that.

I'm not saying ride the cyclone is perfect in terms of representation- there is a LOT to be said about what they did with Ricky (#saverickypotts). But this is proof that you CAN, in fact, have queer characters and their stories inside of stories that are not inherently queer, and this is why you SHOULD. Because we don't deserve to feel as if the only way we'll ever be accepted is by locking ourselves in a room with only each other and become completely unable to engage with the outside world because every interaction with it becomes so fucking draining. If you're writing a story with mostly straight people, and one of the characters "happened to be (insert queer identity)"... I just want you to know, they don't have to act hyper-respectable all the time, they just need the narrative to treat them with respect. Not just about their identity. About their entire internal world, too. Let them have the dignity of people even if they're sometimes cringe, or weird, or overshary, or bad at communication. Because this is how much it can mean to someone.

[flaggermuser]

Walking Into Spiderwebs

865 words || Enemies to Friends, Fluff, Spidersona OC, Moon-based Supe, Arachnophobia, No Spiders were harmed in this fic, Awkward Encounter, AU, The BenLander timeline, Luna is not with Homelander, OC & OC ||

A little gift to one of my favourite writes @sehtoast

Thank you to @homelandercollection for being my beta hostage.

Divider by cafekitsune

“Hi, Ben?” 

Ben sits up on the couch, turning to see Luna standing there. He’s surprised to see her, especially as she could, in no uncertainty terms, be called a bitch. She doesn't spend any time with anyone else on the team, except for Black Noir, the two of them speaking in sign language, or spelling out letters on their palms when they don't want to ‘speak out loud’.

“You, you can talk to spiders, right? That's, that's like one of your powers?”

Ben squints at Luna, trying to work out if what she's asking is a joke but the more he stares at her, the more he notices things; like how she's squeezing her fingers. It's a typical sign that she's uncomfortable along with the strained smile that doesn't exactly reach her eyes.

“No,” he replies, once he’s sure that she’s not mocking his powers, making him the butt of a joke she would relay to Black Noir. “I can't talk to spiders. Why do you ask?” 

She rocks back on her heels, slightly embarrassed to explain exactly why she's here. Her next question, however, makes it a little more obvious.

“But you're okay with spiders, right? They don't freak you out, you're not scared of them.”

It finally dawns on Ben exactly why she’s here, and why she’s approached him of all people.

“There's a spider in your penthouse isn't there,” he asks, slightly annoyed that she didn’t ask outright and, instead, danced around the issue. “Do you want me to get it out?”

“Thank God! Yes! Please, please, I will do anything! Please, it's, it's huge, it's a massive spider like it's the biggest thing I've ever seen! Please, please help me get rid of it!”

The biggest spider she'd ever seen, however, just happened to be as big as a 50-cent piece but he could understand that she was scared of spiders. So a quick swing across the city to Central Park and the lovely little spider was released safely, ready to make friends, rather than die by being squashed beneath a boot.

When he returns to her penthouse, he finds her standing there with the same strained smile and a fresh hot pie sitting on the coffee table.

“Thank you for that,” she says, gesturing to the pie. “I hope you don't mind but I baked you a pie.” 

She chuckles nervously. “And I didn't know what kind you like so I made a cherry pie. I hope that's okay.”

She seemed like she was trying her best to be friendly, only for it to dissolve into vulnerability. She sighed deeply, her face in her hands and her shoulders slumped.

“I'm really sorry,” her voice was the softest he’d ever heard coming from her lips. “I'm just not good at this kinda stuff. Ever since I've been brought on the team, I know I'm only here to distract from Stormfront and I don't want to be here. I’m hoping that if I was a bitch they would let me go.”

It’s almost sad to see her act this way but this is the first time he's ever seen her interact other than an occasionally dirty glance and the silent look of disdain she gave everyone.

“Do you want to try something?” he asks with a smile.

Luna’s genuine laugh was… interesting.

Ben had never heard it before, even when he’d seen her interacting with Black Noir. He was convinced that Luna never smiled, never laughed, that her face was just stoic.

But now, as she swings in the spiderweb hammock he created, she seems more approachable. The walls she’s built around herself have crumbled slightly, enough for Ben to get a glimpse of who she is. However, he can’t shake the feeling that he wants to know more.

“You said you know you’re a distraction.”

The laughter and swinging come to a halt, the smile is gone from her lips and her guard is up again. He’s about to apologise for souring the mood when her mouth opens and the words cascade out.

They’re far too elegantly spoken to be considered word vomit.

In the space of only fifteen minutes, he’s heard the story of her life - from the moment she was born until this very second. He can’t help but find some similarities between their lives, yet mostly, he feels a sense of melancholy, feeling sympathy for her.

After all, it’s clear why she’s the way she’s pretending to be.

“I don’t know what else I can do to be kicked off the Seven except, of course, to do something so repulsive and drastic like The Deep.”

She turns to look at him, her eyes wet with some tears managing to escape and another gentle smile.

“Thank you, for this, for all of this,” she gestures to her penthouse ceiling, currently covered in a sea of spiderwebs. “I’ve never felt safe enough to talk to anyone about how I feel, how I really feel. You’re just really nice, and kind, and warm.”

“I do my best,” he chuckles in response. “Hey, if you ever need someone to talk to, or just hang out with, I’m always available.”

“Thanks, Ben.”

[forbidding-souda]

Kazuichi, Kokichi, Nagito, and Rantaro hcs for a male s/o that has a thing for butts/farts/poop?

I considered a few other characters for this, so don't be surprised if I come back at some point :3

Kazuichi Souda, Kokichi Ouma, Nagito Komaeda and Rantarou Amami with a male S/O who is into butts, farts and poop (short headcanons)

sorry guys i'm not posting so much like i promised but i'm in my relapsed era i haven't spent a single night sober #insomnia

This is also short short short short short headcanons bc brain is thinking about the versatility of situations so i don't wanna section things off into one scenario. + obvious i have no idea what i'm doing so let me know and send that prt 2! I'll provide! Whatever makes you feel more represented. Anyway I researched that this kink comes in a wide variety in terms of on a scale of things so i just wrote what i read about. I'll make it longer the second time bc I think I've gotten ahold of what's going on in this scat community.

this was so fun to write so if anyone wants to send requests then lmk i love stigmatized fetishes.

-Mod Souda

Kazuichi Souda

❤ It's not crazy to him

❤ He loves being desired anyway.

❤ Such a natural biological process having such a sexual effect on you is almost amusing, in a prideful way.

❤ Serial hand washer afterwards

❤ Definitely more on the emitting side rather than the touchy feely side.

❤ Consuming what his body can produce, it's alluring. It makes your heart race, it fuels your arousal. It's almost addicting. You feel as if you're involved with him on a level that surpasses physical and mental desire.

❤ Ass eater ty. Likes his ass eaten too.

❤ Has def never have a rim job but fw it heavy after you do it to him.

❤ The feeling of his farts coming out is just to die for. He'll let you touch him, smell him, adore him.

❤ Will jack you off as you can smell the scents his body lets out.

x

Kokichi Ouma

❤ Completely open to it, it's not the worst thing on the planet.

❤ It's the sensations that was the first surprise. Warmth, goo, touch, the smell.

❤ Okay to laugh at himself. he will not be able to take it seriously and will crack jokes.

❤ He doesn't have many jokes about the farting aspect, he'll just keep his eyes on you, analyzing your reaction.

❤ Loves having stuff inserting inside of his ass, and as a gay man i can confirm that when a dick is pulled out of you really fast it literally feels like shitting. So that's basically just practice for this fetish.

❤ It being taboo is part of the fun.

❤ Is hella good at rim jobs.

❤ Has mastered the perfect angles when it comes to taking videos of him shitting.

x

Nagito Komaeda

❤ Definitely flattered that you're open to him about it.

❤ He loves stigma's so bam.

❤ He definitely already has that one worksheet of fetishes ready to go.

❤ Does he wash his hands? Srry LOL.

❤ Now he definitely doesn't mind things like shit smeared on surfaces or touching it in areas like that.

❤ Will give you blowjobs as he deficates. Could be in the 69 position too, whatever you prefer.

❤ Give him a crazy rim job and he'll be devoted to you.

❤ I feel like he's be into piss to shit is like the short step above that.

❤ Farting makes him feel girly in a way. It seems like such a strangely feminine thing to be lusted over.

x

Rantarou Amami

❤ He's sexy ash so good pick

❤ Stigma stigma stigma but who gaf. He travels anyway. It's more popular in different countries. He's not uneducated, just unpracticed.

❤ Hand washer

❤ He's like get away from the carpet please and thank you.

❤ Not used to being the bottom in any way, and having things inserted into him is such a strange feeling, especially being stretched to suck an extent. But having his body's natural bowel movement be what gets you off, then perfect. He doesn't have to do much.

❤ Seeing such a beautiful man doing something so dirty, rawr rawr rawr,

❤ The fart part is easier, surprisingly.

❤ When he's away, he'll take videos of him shitting for you <3 he loves you that much.

❤ But his body's odor in person is what you want the most.

[boss-poss]

My take on the whole HD2 psn account scandal is that it sucks and it should have been expected but I really want to highlight just how far under the bus sony is throwing the devs with this:

-Announcement came out yesterday, meaning that the brunt of the (assuredly) expected blowback occurs over a weekend when most of the players don't have anything better to do and the news has reached most of them. Arrowhead takes the heat and eventually anger simmers down when monday rolls around and people get back to work and such. No skin off sony's back.

-Arrowhead community managers are already known to be blunt and dismissive compared to other games making them, and arrowhead by extension, seem the easy target as they deal with complaints. AH says they're already chasing sony about related issues but the chance of the big S giving anything more than an empty promise (if even that) is remote.

-HD2 has a large community, and as with any game playerbase, it's filled with reactionary idiots and trolls. The principle of the thing (giving sony your leash), not to mention the hassle or regional issues that could come with creating a psn account, is enough to whip people into a frenzy. There was no way this was expected to go over well.

-The requirement for a psn account was always noted but was waived for a couple of months, more than enough time for people to get invested and buy premium currency, not to mention the game becoming a landmark title among a sea of trash. That's more than enough time to forget a stipulation like that. Can't have people refunding to show their displeasure!

-A warbond was announced right before the psn mandate so whether that was to try and cushion the blow or just unfortunate timing or a mandate from higher up it makes AH look like they prioritize selling you stuff over player enjoyment, adding fuel to the fire.

-A lack of polish in certain areas of the game and rampant balance issues that cause players and the devs to butt heads have been ongoing issues since launch. Clearly, AH is having a time keeping their vision and player enjoyment balanced which has already created a fairly deep divide. The psn requirement is pretty much taking a hammer to a widening crack and will (whether intentionally or not) bring more heat towards the developers.

-PSN is famously bad at security and ultimately pointless off of their consoles, with numerous huge data breaches and accounts offering little more to players than a way for you to give your information so sony can sell it. That seems to me to be the main motive here, alongside cementing the notion of HD2 as a playstation exclusive (sorry xbox players but I don't think you'll be getting this game anytime soon). A live service game that isn't squeezing every last penny out of its players at every opportunity is ultimately financially inefficient and I'm sure some sony people are kept up at night by that fact.

-The biggest fuck you I've seen though is that the game is sold on steam in countries sony doesn't support, meaning that you could have bought and played the game already and then now be barred from playing it a few months later (can't have those pesky, preemptive refunds). Also, VPNs are against sony terms of service, so yeah... any burner accounts could get you banned and be a huge hassle.

I can't conclusively say that sony set up arrowhead as the patsy while they try to collect all that sweet, succulent, valuable, personal data but I don't believe this was an accident either. Corporations are far from stupid and fortunately for them and unfortunately for consumers, a significant portion of us are pretty easy to lead by the nose to certain conclusions. They know this and many facets of business work along those lines. Outrage is profitable and brings attention, if you're not the one in the direct line of fire.

I feel bad for the devs and I doubt much will come of this besides a temporary drop in players and maybe some sort of optional linking concession if things get dire enough, but I doubt the game will fail. Arrowhead aren't the devil but they did sign on his dotted line and sometimes the cost of success is getting told you'll bending over and taking it for someone else. Seems to be the case here to me at least.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hai! Can you do hcs for a fem aggressive punk!reader x Jax from tadc

Jax x fem!aggressive!punk reader

So sorry for the long wait! I kind of.. got some tracked with other stuff- UHUHuh obligatory admin is not very educated in punk culture or music so he's going off of quick research at 3am

Notes: reader is fem

CWs: none

sometimes you guys can butt heads thanks to your aggression and his need to be a menace, sometimes things can get... messy... but i like to think that you guys eventually move past it and make up in your own way

arguments are likely to get heated, though, if you both end up getting into a disagreement around something... not so petty...

he likes to get under your skin by calling you anything other than punk, think of it how people group emo with goth or something similar- he thinks its a little funny if you get pressed over it

secretly he does think you look cool, in terms of style and fashion

calls you punk but like in a "you're a little shit" kind of way, again as a joke to get a reaction out of you

never really listened to punk music before but you might be able to get him into it if you give him some recommendations

you're both fast and high energy, so you can keep up with each other in your day to day so that's always nice!