#soichiro: L there's people that are dying

[skieystar]

I really want a version of death note where all the shinigami are equally bored so they agree with ryuk to let them in on the fun but they can't all go to the human world obviously so ryuk takes a camera with him and films light's entire journey like it's a reality show

[imaginarianisms]

like. just a reminder that misa was forced like this for. 3 days. then misa was strapped onto a board in a straitjacket with full body restraints restricting her movements & blindfolded, while forced to stand throughout her incarceration; under 24/7 surveillance (without even the uncertain dignity afforded by a female guard doing the watching), subject to verbal intimidation, forced to use the bathroom publicly, without any legal counsel nor formal charges levied against her for 50 consecutive days which is a whole month & likely more days & we see l tell watari to "do whatever he needs to just to make her talk". misa was tortured.

she wasn't given water in those three days of her torture. like. i'm& not an expert but from what i've& read, an average human can go without water for 4 days at most & the limit is closer to 3 days without dying from dehydration. i've& also read that it’s something between 2-6 days, depending on the person & depending on the person's body needs in question, but literally no one can live more than 5-6 days without water. l canonically tortures misa & literally could've killed misa here.

(which, btw, even if l's the world's greatest detective in-universe he literally has no legal basis of doing this, he's a foreigner torturing a japanese civilian on japanese soil)

i have. no idea what's in those bottles from watari but the implications are. Not Good

she was quite literally bound and blindfolded for three days & she was begging rem the shinigami to kill her or she'll commit suicide.

the universal declaration of human rights & its counterparts found in the japanese constitution & other laws - exist to protect people, including people like misa & light (which, in this case, Does happen in real life japanese interrogation cells which i genuinely wouldnt be surprised if the writers were trying to subtly point this out) from the likes of l. there were no police officers around courageous enough to enforce international law. that's how most remain complicit in on-going human rights abuses in reality around the world - by their silence, looking the other way, keeping themselves ignorant & generally acting in denial of their own ability to intervene. those are likely to be the kind of excuses within the minds of the task force officers watching misa, then light, tortured in dn. while they do scream, shout, stamp around & shake their heads going, "no, this is wrong" (then finally half of them walk out), they don't actually DO anything about it. any one of these men present, including soichiro yagami, who btw is light's own father & he allowed this to happen to light, could have physically overpowered l in order to get him to stop with no problem. instead, they attempted to reason with him, then backed down. like he had the right to do what he did, even as a foreigner torturing japanese citizens on japanese ground & he didn't have that right, not by japanese law, he's not a police officer nor has he taken an oath of legal service under any japanese code of practice, nor under international law, no matter what light & misa did, they were born with certain rights, immutable & without exception, including the right not to be tortured. the reason why i'm& bringing this up is specifically Because of what happened to her, misa no longer trusts the government nor the justice system even more than she already hadn't with her own case of her parents' murderers & their murderer likely going to get away & not get a trial & it's Because of this treatment that misa works even harder as the second kira.

[asmallmoon333]

Halloween season! So monster AU Lawlight. What do you think they would be? The rest of the cast?

Fun question!! I'd say in a Haloween setting we'd have:

Light: Demon, particularly one with powers of compulsion, contracts, and death. Makes a contract in exchange for a life, the contractees never get what they think they will and all end up dying of heart attacks. Alias Kira, goal to purify the world. He's a pretty young supernatural, only a year old after dying as a human at 23. Demons are humans or supernaturals that died with unfilfilled desires, but ones so strong they become demons rather than ghosts. Helps if they contracted another demon before dying. They can also very sucessfully pass as the human/super they used to be, making them difficult to find.

L: Vampire, very old and powerful, has spent most of the last few decades napping. May or may not have been due to an epic sugar crash. He heard Demon blood tastes wonderfully sweet from an anonymous source and now wants to confirm >v>. Goal: to have cake and nibble on Kira.

Misa: Witch, she's been working ages to make a love potion that works on a demon. Has been unsuccessful. In the meantime tries her best to kill L with unique spells. Also unsuccessfully. A very powerful witch as she has a demon familiar who shares her powers with Misa.

Rem: Demon familair, Misa's in particular. Her original form was something aquatic, deep sea horror-type supernatural. She bound herself to Misa willingly out of love and gave Misa full access to her powers. That's why Misa is a very powerful witch despite still being human, and why Light keeps her around.

Ryuk: Also a demon, but uncontracted. Was a tengu before dying. He was the one that made a deal with Light was the latter was human, and the reason Light was reborn as a demon after dying. Is having the time of his life.

Mello: Vamp, sired by L so he took some of his traits. Mello was dying one night from a gang fight and L saved him and then just vanished. Mello wants to meet L to ask him why he turned him. He's competitive against Near. Doesn't try to control his bloodlust at all, and becomes the head of the mafia that killed him in a very brutal takeover.

Near: Also a Vamp sired by L, doesn't care as much as Mello does, but is still curious to meet him. Was half-fae on his mother's side but no one knew it since he was an orphan, the fact that he managed to turn successfully into a Vamp shocked a lot of people. Is under constant watch by the US government. He can control his bloodlust very well and has muted emotions. He's ambivalent to Mello.

Matt: Sylph, electric specifically. Likes to static shock people for fun. Was Mello's friend when he'd been human but didn't tell him about the supernatural community. He and Mello are sometimes at odds because of it since Mello thought they'd told each other everything, considering they grew up together.

Watari: Mad Scientist/Professor Fankenstein type. Can bring inanimate objects to life. He woke L from a very long sleep and now works with him to police the unruly supernatural community in exchange for the blood of criminals L catches. His main goal is to stop Kira.

Kiyomi: Siren, her voice and words can compel people to believe her. Acts as Kira's public voice. She thinks her voice works on Light; it does not.

Mikami: Werewolf or werecat. Hates it. His main goal in life is to be able to suppress his animalistic transformation completely. Hates both humans and the supernatural community, loves Kira for culling them.

Matsuda: Wizard. Very bad at it lmao, but born into a powerful family so he has access to a lot of good tools and relics for hunting demons.

Soichiro, Sayu, Sachiko: All human, Light's family whom he still protects. Light pretends to be human still and lives close to them. Soichiro knows about supernaturals since he works in the government, and has his suspicions of Light.

Rest of the cast: a menagerie of humans and otherwise, but my brain is tired. In general, the governments of every country know about this but keep it quiet for public panic reasons.

So, yeah, thanks for the fun question!! It ended up turning into a whole AU with background involved lmao.

[mikami]

They did Light sooo dirty in the new exhibition artwork 😭😭😭 I don't get of all his iconic scenes, they went with his death. Why not his "just as planned" scene, "I am Kira" or even "I'll take a potato chip and eat it"?

I gotta defend the artwork on this front, the theme is "death" or "lowest point" for the majority of characters depicted!

We see Light, Rem and Matt actually dying. L is holding the spoon he drops as he dies. Mello and Soichiro are depicted in their confrontation that ultimately seals both their fates. Mikami is shown in the onset of his breakdown that ultimately leads to his own death. Misa's death has no canon visual associated with it, so she gets a different brutal scene involving her.

Really, the only people who have positive or neutral moments depicted are the other shinigami, Watari and Near.

I still think the artwork isn't SUPER coherent, but I can at least see this as a theme if I squint so... credit where credit is due.

[captainhysunstuff]

I think that was the first time I've seen you draw any of the Wammy boys, and it makes me want to know your headcanons for them, either inside our universe or just in general.

Henh, I draw them from time to time. Probably not in the last few months, but... every once in a while~. ^__^U Oh boy, for as long as I've been in this fandom, I don't think I've ever really put my thoughts/headcanons about them into solid words before. I'll try to make this not a disorganized mess:

Mello

I feel like his rivalry with Near gives him a sense of purpose. A goal to strive for. Whenever he has a set goal, he goes for it 120%. That try hard attitude is exactly what holds him back though. Being so laser focused may stress him out and cause him to overlook things and make more mistakes or ignore simpler solutions. He forgets to take breaks, and his fatigue creates more problems, particularly with schoolwork.

We only get one glimpse of him "off the clock" where he's playing soccer/football with his classmates (and laughs after clocking someone in the head with the ball, lol). That one instance tells me that he might have a slightly mean sense of humor (he's also seen pulling some kid's hair and Roger makes him let go of them), but of course the kid was okay and he knew it. If he had actually seriously hurt someone while joking around, I'm not sure if he'd just laugh it off. Probably try to say it wasn't a big deal, but still keep an ear out to make sure so-and-so was really okay. Very tsundere. I may be giving canon!Mello too much credit, lol. Although, he does express that he didn't want to kill Soichiro in the end. The kidnappings were horrible scare tactics, but he made sure that they would be returned alive if the demands were met (fuck his mafia crew though, *snort*).

He'd be more openly caring with people he, well, cares about. Matt as an obvious canon example. I think it's very telling that Matt isn't present during the Mafia arc. Mello leaves the orphanage alone, and he doesn't seek Matt out until after his base blows up. So, he strikes me as someone who wants to deal with his own problems by himself and not drag anyone he cares about into his personal drama. The mafia and kidnappees are just tools to him, but anyone close is out of the question unless the situation is dire. Matt was probably the only person he could reliably contact at that point (he does contact and crash at Lidner's place for a while, but surely he had to have recovered somewhere after the blast before he could get back into the action). How he expresses regret over Matt dying while being part of his plan emphasizes this sentiment.

A character I really associate him with is Amethyst from Steven Universe, especially if I want to think of how he'd be without the pressure of that rivalry, and even with it. Amethyst has the kind of humor that can come off as callous that I'd think Mello would have. What really shines for me is their shared inferiority complex and how they deal with them. I see a lot of Mello's view on his rivalry with Near during Amethyst's arc concerning her conflicts with Jasper. Neglecting personal time to have fun because the complex is weighing her down and making her try harder and become a more toxic person to be around ("Who has time for any of that when Jasper is out there?!"). Her anguish at doing so much to get better and it never being enough to get what she wants ("I can't win... No matter what I do, no matter how hard I work..."). The whole episode "Reformed" where Amethyst keeps trying to make a form that Garnet (whom I associate with L) would approve of by comparing herself to and emulating other gems. Telling people to "stay out of it" when they try to interfere or stop her from doing something drastic. The difference being that she gets positive results when she finally opens up and allows people to help her achieve her goals and not hyperfixate anymore. By the time Mello finally reaches out for help and realizes that he needs to put aside his animosity towards Near to ultimately stop Kira, it's essentially too late for a happy ending.

The only aspect where this character comparison falls apart a bit is with how lazy Amethyst can be (not bubbling the Desert Glass pillow despite living right next to a sandy beach, not being trusted to catch a monster hiding in her room). However, my counterargument is that we don't really see Mello in his downtime outside of that soccer game just chilling. Also, I'd like to reference L's "monster speech" about studying even though they don't really care about grades. It shows Near there, but I think it applies to all three of them, and Mello's only trying so hard specifically to beat Near first and foremost, not because he wants to study and get smarter for a future career ("All that practice stuff is no fun.").

Matt

Hmm... He's a malleable character to me, and that's pretty cool. He seems like a "go with the flow" kinda guy. Tell him to do something, and he'll be like, "Yeah, sure. Let me save my game first." I sort of accept whatever the fandom wants him to be in the moment, no matter what it is. The fact that he's the third smartest at Wammy's tells me that he's an effortlessly smart guy. Maybe he's good at memorization and can visually remember the answers to test questions without having to study that hard (like how I was at school, lol). Maybe not come up with the answer on the spot, but if you put something in front of him, he could go, "Oh, right," and correctly answer it. He has a little characterization in the manga, but I only just recently finished reading it, his scenes included. He really only seems to be part of the Kira case to help Mello and that's it. He doesn't seem too interested in the case itself, but Mello asked for his help, and he said, "Sure, dude. I'll try." Thus, it's why we see him gripe about how much work Mello's making him do, getting sidetracked by how cute Misa is, and speculating whether or not Mogi's her boyfriend, lol. Just a chill dude overall.

His chillness makes me think that ordinarily he'd keep to himself. Probably not to the extent that Near does, but if left alone, he is more than happy staying alone. He minds his own business, thus why he doesn't dissuade Mello from his rivalry or stop him from leaving Wammy's House (not that anyone could stop Mello from doing anything). But if someone extends an invitation, he'll accept it and try his best.

Also, "Mail" is pronounced "Mile." According to the Wiki, the katakana is written as "ma-i-ru." If it was "mail," it would be "me-i-ru" or "me--ru" I believe (henh, the his name would be close to Mel). Correct me if I'm wrong, but it's "mile" for me, and it ain't changin'.

Near

The first phrase I think of whenever I think of Near is "little shit~." XD I say that in an entirely affectionate way of course. Although, that "little shit" attitude only comes out when he's actively engaged with someone else. Not necessarily hostile, but definitely a little condescending, and it's very easy for him to rub people the wrong way. Perhaps he knows he has this effect on people, either intentionally or not, and this is why he keeps to himself and declines invitations to hang out? He probably doesn't even like being around people (he judges people very harshly in the manga). Maybe even mildly misanthropic. He might resent that he's co-dependent and has to rely on people on the daily when he gets older and leaves Wammy's House.

The reason he has the best grades at Wammy's is because he can fully focus on the tests and assignments he takes and doesn't make many technical mistakes. Makes me wonder if he's a slow test taker or exactly a mid-speed test taker? Or maybe he's effortlessly fast? Then, Mello wants to be fast, too, and that causes Mello to make more mistakes due to rushing when he could probably get better grades if he took his time?

It's very hard for me to talk about Near without bringing Mello into the picture. Their rivalry is such a focal point with their characters in the story. The rivalry is almost completely one sided in my opinion, but Near probably encourages it because he thinks Mello needs that goal. So, every once in a while, he'll make remark or do something that will purposely annoy Mello, reigniting that fire under his ass to make Near eat his dust. In the harsh judgment vein, he believes Mello's identity has been shaped around the competition and that he'd be lost without it. Kind of like how Near canonically becomes a bit despondent after the Kira case ends: taking the L mantle, but just going through the motions. Detective work doesn't seem like his passion; he was just groomed for it and is good at it. He'd be more than content to just lie around, making card castles and play single-player games all day. Maybe an occasional visit from respected company, but they'd better leave in a timely manner or be relatively unobtrusive, lol.

EDIT: Also worth mentioning, I have a ridiculous headcanon where Near has psychic powers in the anime. Thank the anime’s short hand in how he singles out Mikami as X-Kira by making his eyes glow and the room spin. I stand by that he blew up a guy’s head with his mind in the Re:Light special. Hey, if Beyond Birthday being born with shinigami eyes is canon, why not humans with psychic powers? Wammy’s is good at finding these eccentricities~.

Mello and Near's Tactics

I really do love how the narrative intention seemed to be that after Light defeated L, L was essentially split into two people with those two extremes amplified to 11. It creates a pincer attack around Light: Mello aggressively hitting the Task Force from the outside, putting traumatic emotional stress on them, and Near poking and prodding away from the inside trying to gradually create a mutiny against Light while acting like he's working alongside them. Mello brings the fear and pressure (and suspense in that he's just floating around doing who knows what after the raid), and Near seeds the doubt and inner unrest. When mashed together, they wouldn't make L exactly, but a being/team more effective and terrifying than L (surpass him together, indeed). Lord help their Watari, lol.

--

I suppose those are my thoughts on the main three in a decently sized nutshell. Feel free to say I'm wrong or unfounded. I'm no expert with these characters, so hopefully my headcanons and interpretations don't piss anyone off too much. ^__^

[thewolfpackwrites]

This is going to sound aggressive but I promise it's just because I'm passionate about this and not because I'm flaming anyone or trying to shit on their headcanons/force my narrative down.

ANYWAY:

Light is severely fucking traumatized by his father (he even calls him "dad". DAD. Light being informal with someone like Soichiro??) basically calling him a murderer, a monster, and that they'll both meet each other in Hell before quite literally turning the gun on him.

Yes sure he plays it off quickly because it's Yagami fucking Light and he always regains his composure quickly (especially when he knows someone is watching, especially L), but you can't tell me it doesn't haunt him even when he regains his memories. He has night terrors and might even had some delayed panic attacks after they returned to base.

You can say Kira didn't care/barely cared about Soichiro dying but for the rest of the chapter they hide his eyes and Ryuk doesn't say SHIT. He's silent not just because there are other people around but also because he's silly, not stupid - he knows not to overstep that boundary after the shit Light did to Penber after his father called Kira evil.

You can't be bound and watched 24/7 for almost two months and then have your father pull this shit and just go back to living normally without ever thinking about it again (unless he deeply suppressed that memory and as much as Light can handle immediate stress - he cannot handle a consistent build up, it shows up well with how he snaps like 100 times), especially when you're still put under 24/7 surveillance while you really think you're innocent and start gaslighting yourself. Yes I know Yotsuba act Light was correct but HE DOESN'T KNOW THAT.

Look at it. You gave it dissociation. Everything about that operation was illegal and sadistic towards Light even if Kira-Light set himself up to it. Kira did a lot of things that were self-destructive and damaging just to get his way and/or survive and while yes he's a mass murderer with basically no remorse (He loved his family and I'll die on that hill) but we need to remember he's still a human and he does, by some miracle, has feelings and that guy goes through such traumatizing things like Misa threatening to do irrational things that could blow his cover, threatening innocent women's lives, and Rem threatening *his* life making him suddenly responsible for another killer, being confined under pretty damn inhumane and dehumanizing conditions, being led to believe his own father was planning a murder suicide with a girl he felt protective of, that felt protective of him too, Misa's screaming and begging and then gaslighting himself on and off and having to baby L's depression to find the real Kira -

He puts up with SO MUCH and still manages to forge small human connections and not lose all of his remaining sanity/compassion and now I'm just repeating myself so.

Light is traumatized and while he's a terrible shitty person he didn't deserve half the shit that was done to him, memories intact or not.

[grimalkinmessor]

Actually actually actually—I think I will expand a bit on my BNHA/DN character parallels just a little bit because,,,,

I just realized that Doctor Garaki's orphan hospital is a lot like Wammy's House :')

BUT I will go in order because why not: Matsuda and Midoriya.

I think this one's kind of obvious but I'll expand on it nonetheless; Midoriya may be the main character to Matsuda's side character, but their personalities and roles are very similar. They're both unfailingly kind and they see the best in people, to the point that it's easy for them to empathize and see from the villain's point of view. They tend to adopt the same beliefs as those around them and/or above them until something happens to challenge those beliefs. They both have elder mentor figures that they want to be like (Soichiro and All Might) and they are constantly striving to be like their mentors. Midoriya and Matsuda also share a sense of worthlessness in the face of idle hands—meaning that if they don't feel like they're doing something useful, they will try to find some other way to help. Both Matsuda and Midoriya are always, always, trying to help.

Bakugou and Aizawa is a little less steady comparison wise, but they're both hot-headed and loyal people. They both think they know what's best but aren't afraid to (reluctantly) take orders from others if they know, logically, that those orders are going to further the goal. They both prefer to be hands-on, and they both have a role in sticking by the happy-yet-sad-too-trusting-kid to both insult them into submission and keep them from dying and/or protecting them. Bakugou-Midoriya and Aizawa-Matsuda are both very antagonistic/protective relationships, it's kinda funny.

Misa and Toga I feel like I don't have to explain. Sure, they have a lot more differences than the others but honestly I think that if Ohba hadn't been such a pussy when it came to giving his female characters actual character then they'd be extremely similar. Twins, even. Let 👏 Misa 👏 Be 👏 Feral 👏👏👏

Light and Yoichi is a comparison that was odd for me to make for several reasons, first and foremost of which being that Yoichi isn't the villain in his story. (Second of which being Yoichi is a soft boi but we'll come back to that). But I ended up on Yoichi for Light because 1. I had already chosen L's parallel character and 2. their roles in their stories are very similar if you look at the intent behind them. A man who stands behind others, surrounding himself with like-minded people as he urges them to fight for the cause of the greater good, to save the world, even if they die in the crossfire—knowing, even, that they're likely going to die in the crossfire. Now yes, Yoichi physically CAN'T fight on the front lines because he's DEAD, and his greater good is actually, you know, good, but again the intent there is the same. Their roles in relation to their respective antagonists are also very similar: another man in the shadows is hunting you down with a fervor known only to wild predator animals and you are doing everything possible to not only keep out of his clutches but also to stop him from impeding the safe growth of what you consider to be a good world. Idk Yoichi just seemed like the most logical conclusion.

Mello and Dabi is an easier comparison for a few reasons (though yes I did consider Dabi for a Ryuk parallel for a minute or two). The most obvious of which being their recklessness and viciousness. They both have burn scars because they're both idiots that blew themselves up out of spite like,,,how. Mello parallels Dabi in that he 1. leaves home, 2. has a younger 'brother' that he's competing with and cripplingly jealous of, 3. has so much ambition that he was willing to wait YEARS for his plans to come to fruition, 4. joined a group of dangerous criminals in order to further his goals, 5. committed enthusiastic arson. Plus, look at the way these two dress. You could cut a leather couch in half and get both of their wardrobes. Cunning goth little himbos, both of them.

Near is Todoroki's parallel for a lot of the same reasons as above. His role in relation to Mello is incredibly similar to Shoto's in relation to Dabi. A younger competitor that surpasses the elder unintentionally, only making the elder that much angrier, and has little to no desire to actually be the successor of the man the elder idolizes. They are literally just fuckin' sitting here. Also, less and also more important—both of them are socially stunted and autistic ✨ "If I smile they'll die??" vibes from both of them plzzz. Both of them are also incredibly feral but the fandoms refuse to focus on that part for some reason.

Matt and Spinner. Less points, but honestly Exasperated Side Character With A Larger Role In A Main Character's Life Than You Anticipated That Also Goes Hard For Video Games is all I needed, really. Also they're both designated driver.

L and All For One—the whole reason I decided to expand on this—have SO. MANY. PARALLELS. They do not look like it at all and it drives me nuts because All For One may be a villain and my brain initially wanted to give him to Light but. No. No, L has this man down pat and it's a little infuriating :') This also comes down to me comparing Watari to Doctor Garaki but first things first: All For One is, at his core, a corporate head. Both he and L have spent literal decades building up their empires, both monetary wise and reputation wise, and used them to do whatever they hell they wanted. L may solve cases and put criminals away, but guess what? So does All For One! When it benefits him. L solves cases because he's bored, and he paints over the face of it as Justice™ because it gets him more sympathisers and tools to use. He's constantly playing a giant game of chess and people are little more than pawns and cannon fodder. He has Watari running a successor program so L can live on after he's gone, just like AFO has with Doctor Garaki (I wanted to make Near parallel Shigaraki bc of the line between Shigaraki and Dabi as AFO's potential successors, but Todoroki called his name instead so wcyd). Both of them play both sides of the board as a grand sort of puppet master, and the only thing that differs is what side they lean toward. L leans more towards lawful morality, AFO leans more toward anarchic depravity—both of them are ultimately playing for themselves.

I have a few more character parallels, but I'll stop here for today. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this :3

[hello-nichya-here]

Did Light cry genuinely when his father died? He may be an unmatched actor but I don't think Light could genuinely shed tears without sincerely feeling something.

I do believe it was genuine. There was a bit of his bastard side showing, with him trying to make his dad use his last minutes on Earth to write Mello's true name on the Death Note, but unlike with L's death, we are not explicitly shown that his shock and, more importantly, his grief, was an act he put on for the people around him.

And even with L, we see him thinking back on his rival saying that things would not be as interesting anymore, since they were about to be separated, and Light not only admits to himself that he is lonely, he is also downright offended when Near is wearing an L mask because he feels it's disrespectful to compare anyone (except himself of course) to a genius on L's level.

More importantly, when Mello is holding his sister hostage to try and get a Death Note as a condition to let her go, Light considers killing her - but can't go through with it. That says a lot when we take into account how Light usually doesn't even hesitate to kill someone, let alone feel too horrified at the thought of that person dying to actually get rid of them, even with their survival could be a threat to them.

Light Yagami does all the horrible things he does because he thinks himself so superior to others that he sees them more like pawns in his game or obstacles in his way than human beings. But he is still capable of human emotion, and he sometimes gets attached to others, even if 9 times out of 10 he puts his own interests before their right to live.

Light knew that there was a chance he'd one day have to kill one of his relatives if they got access to the Death Note. He used his image as "perfect son" to convince people he'd always hate Kira for putting his father at risk and, eventually, killing him. He also clearly didn't have any issue planning the murder of the entire task force, and did not give a shit when Matsuda is outraged that Soichiro died because of the actions of his own son.

But in that hospital room, when Soichiro's strength left him, Light was just a young man crying because his father had passed away.

[mirrorred-star]

Whumptober Day 15

Its midnight, fuckers! YEET!

I am not putting this in the main tags because I am a weenie and I would not be surprised if there were Nazis there. I'd been thinking of tagging death note stuff 'moon moon and his [something] notebook' but I caught some greek tragedy vibes instead. Too bad its been so long since I did Classical Greek that I can't do the translation I want.

Prompt: Lies

Fandom: Death Note

Characters: L, Light, Soichiro

Wordcount: 1,053 [cut scene 201]

The heck is happening: there is a serial killer targetting criminals and people investigating said murders, the murderer has been nicknamed 'Kira', L is leading the investigation due to being international man of mystery sherlock holmes, Light picked up this weird notebook once and is helping the investigation because he's super-smart and also he's kira. and also L knows Light is Kira but doesn't have enough proof to arrest him and the most senior local investigator is Light's dad Soichiro. awkward.

This technically takes place in the skyscraper that L bought, but there's no point in canon this could have happened, so shrug emoji

warnings: injury, self-injury, manipulation, false accusations.

Summary? I should do a summary: Light lies a lot about not having stabbed L in the chest and having in fact been attacked by L, while L is dying.

"Ugh, why haven't we been able to find Kira yet?"

L said nothing, just shifted his weight between his bare feet. This felt like some sort of trap, but if he tried to defuse it, he might set off the trap. Or let Light know he was onto him.

"How do you even sit like that?"

"Practise."

Light ran his fingers through his hair in mock frustration. "You would have thought that we would at least have a good lead on who Kira is."

"We don't?" L looked up to see Light holding his bleeding arm.

L was out of his chair before he could think about it.

And Light punched him in the chest.

L started to shift his weight to kick him in retaliation, but Light turned his fist sideways, and L felt the distinct feeling of something solid moving inside his chest, and heard the snap of plastic breaking. Light pulled back to show L the handle of the clear plastic knife he'd just embedded in L's chest.

"Fuck you," L responded. Light pushed him back into the chair. "Couldn't have worked better," Light gloated.

L already felt faint. Wrong. This was bad.

"How…?" How had he managed to put all that together and pull that off?

"No one is infallible, L. Not even you."

"Tell me." The demand sounded pathetic, even to him.

Light laughed. "No."

L leaned forward to the console, to contact Watari, but Light pushed him back into the chair. Light clipped one of the handcuffs around L's wrist and looped the length of the chain around L's other wrist to pull both of them together behind his back.

"And what now?" L could feel how hard it was to breathe, even now. "You get caught and executed for my murder."

"No." Light leaned on the shoulder of the chair. "Kira was L the entire time. But you, you will die before you even see trial."

*

Light had planned everything to the last detail. He'd interfered with the video to make parts of it cut out at just the right time. The clear plastic knife had been strong enough so it wouldn't shatter. Leaving it in would mean that the wound wouldn't bleed as much and would be a lot less obvious.

*

"Dad, I'm so sorry, but he attacked me. I was telling him how frustrating it was that we don't know who Kira is, and he attacked me and told me he was Kira, and I grabbed the knife to stop him. And I think I might have nicked him a little, and -"

Light had called Soichiro alone up to the command room. Soichiro was the one of all of them who was the most likely to believe any solid-looking theory that Kira was anyone other than Light, and could maybe be talked into just… leaving L until it was too late for medical attention.

He didn't think that Soichiro would let it go on that long, but it was a distinct, and welcome, possibility.

Soichiro let Light speak until Soichiro had finished bandaging Light's arm.

"L? Is this true?" he asked coldly.

L was starting to have trouble following the conversation, which worried him. A lot.

Soichiro would at least give the appearance of being fair at all times, but he was not so foolish as to believe that Soichiro would believe that his son had stabbed himself and then anyone else.

"No."

The security cameras would be unlikely to help - they would be the most obvious first thing to check, and Light had obviously tampered with them.

Could that be used to his advantage?

"Then what happened?"

"I don't know. The lights cut out for a moment and I stood up to sort it out, then someone stabbed me in the chest. Before I recovered, the lights came back on and Light was securing me to this chair. I assumed he'd stabbed me too, until I saw he was bleeding."

"So some stranger stabbed us both when the lights went down?"

Light snapped. "I saw my attacker - I held up my arms so he wouldn't cut me."

"Then we should watch the security tapes. Maybe we'll see him on it."

"You're not even hurt at all," Light countered. "You're just faking."

"Then maybe we should watch the tapes."

"Maybe you want us to watch the tapes because you know they've been tampered with," Light retorted. "This is your building. You would be the only one able to do that."

Oh shit.

He was wrong - the security guards were well trained enough that they wouldn't even let L access the tapes without recording that he'd accessed them - but it sounded plausible enough.

How had Light managed to tamper with them?

L sighed in frustration. "Soichiro, just arrest us both."

"What?"

"Just… put us both under surveillance in solitary confinement."

"Fine."

*

L stared at the wall. He was feeling less and less tethered to reality. Was that blood loss? There were so many things it could be. Punctured lung, bleeding into the sac of flesh protecting the heart, damage to the heart itself, damage to one of the veins leading to the heart - no, if it was that he'd be dead already. And probably not damage to the heart itself, for the same reason.

This felt kind of like blood loss though, so maybe it was bleeding around the heart? What was that called? Cardiac tamponade? He was pretty sure that was it.

Was he dying? This didn't feel right. He didn't feel panicked about it, though. He just felt untethered.

He was on the floor? That was odd. He didn't think he had been on the floor before. The floor before. That sounded nice. It was cold? Why would the floor be cold?

There were heavy fast footsteps, the door opened. Something heavy hit the ground next to him.

"L? Can you hear me?"

"Its cardiac tamponade, I think. The blade is still in my chest."

Something picked up one of his wrists. "Pulse 20bpm, very weak and thready."

L faintly heard them talk to someone not present, loud and sharp and authoritative and indistinct.

"We're getting you to hospital, now."

"Good," L inhales a shaky breath, then exhaled. "Soichiro's fired."

CUT SCENE

[L is still in the chair with his hands cuffed behind him]

L could feel himself falling forward, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Soichiro looked concerned. "We need to let him out."

"He wants us to let him out so he can attack us again. He's faking," Light said. "He can't be that hurt."

"The knife blade is in my chest."

"No, it's not." Light picked up the knife from the floor, and held it up to the light. The entire knife was clear plastic, and there was blood starting to dry on the blade edge. The blade edge had barbs pointing backwards, so if the knife had been pulled out of someone the barbs would have been ripped off.

"I'm bleeding. There's a hole in my shirt."

"I didn't see anything. Though come to think of it, you are bleeding. I think the knife might have slashed you."

L could feel he was on the edge of passing out. "Can you call Watari over please?"

He felt rather than saw Light shake his head. "Watari's in on it too."

"Please… just, I need to lie down."

"No."

L barely heard the response before the static at the edges of his vision overcame him, and he passed out.

[dea-thynote]

This death note au has been in my mind because I've been thinking (again) where is the original L if he did switch places with musical!L because the sky scraper hadn't been made 😔.

What if he woke up from the warehouse where musical L died. And beside him is a 'very much' dead musical! Light. And gets arrested after a concerned citizen heard a gun shot and screaming in the warehouse.

When original L woke up after dying from a heart attack. He never expected that the first thing that happens would be to get arrested as a suspect for shooting a teenager in a warehouse. He shuffles, the metal benches clearly uncomfortable to his feet and contemplates how he got here.

He remembers his shirt clinging to his body as he stands in the rain. He remembers the sound of church bells ringing faintly in the distance. And light talking to him- no. The moment light had touched the notebook, he was kira. He remembers, the data deletion. He remembers warning everyone, before being cut off by his heart stopping. Light rushing to his side as he collapses to the floor. And his last moments were staring at the malicious grin that's plastered to lights face. He hears the bells again, louder this time. And closes his eyes, with the knowledge that he was right.

Light Yagami is kira.

But at the sound of his heart beating again. He wakes and sits up. Clutching his heart as he panics that its still beating. Disoriented at the noise of people rushing in the warehouse. Wait- a warehouse. He could barely understand what was being said to him, and he zeroes to the body next to him and freezes. Its a young man shot and bleeding, but it doesn't look like it's the cause of his death. Shock, perhaps? Or a heart attac--

He wasn't able to finish that thought as he was jostled harshly by a police(?) Officer and handcuffed his hands behind him. He heard faint sound of radio, but he doesn't mind that as he looks around and wonders where he is. He was forced to the police car and he kept quiet, Until he gets to the interrogation room.

He gets interrogated, what's his name, how old he was, he answered them calmly before one of the officers asks "what's your relation with the victim?" Which he answers that he doesn't know him. "Did you know that the victim was light yagami?" That made him pause, and looks at both officers tells if they're lying. They weren't. And he was even more confused. Because that young man did NOT look like light yagami. At all. He sits there quietly again, refusing and displaying an expression of disinterest to contemplate more in this revelation.

Eventually they both gave up, and just put him in one of the prisons. And that's where he is right now. Planning on how to get out of here and prove his innocence (somehow).

(And now original L has to somehow prove his innocence that no, he did not kill 'light yagami' nor did he shoot him. Nor is he kira because the kira killings stopped after he got imprisoned. And I dunno continue his life as "L". But he somehow doubts that watari would believe him to be L. If the appearance of light yagami or soichiro yagami were any indication, the appearance of the L of this world would also be different).

Death note au (dimension travel) where the original L and Musical L who were suppose to be dead, at their respective universes, wakes up to an alternate reality where everything is the same yet slightly different. If only their counter parts also had the same appearance, it would've been easier for them to navigate this reality.

Musical L wakes up in the abandoned warehouse that is both familiar yet different. But he doesn't mind that because he feels disoriented after he shot himself (isn't he suppose to be dead?). He could still remember the way his heart was beating, the tremor in his hands as it shooks in (was it fear?) Trying to gain control. Yet it didn't change (did he have any control in his actions?) As it steadily turns the gun to his head. His voice, though nonchalant, didn't waver as he spoke his last words. And the last thing he saw was the ceiling of the warehouse- similar to what he is looking at right now. He sits up, and feels a puddle (his blood?) In his fingers and slowly he stands up.

Where is he? He didn't know. Although the warehouse looked similar it somehow looked- older. He reaches for his phone and dials a number. After a few rings, it didn't pick up. A heavy unsettling feeling turns to his stomach as he shoves the phone back to his coat. There's a possibility that watari is dead. (But how? Did Light somehow learnt watari's name? Or did he mention to the other shinigami to kill them both?) He slowly walked towards the heavy metal doors. He knows that kira is light yagami, (why am I not dead?) And he'll be damned if he still wasn't able to put him down to his execution.

Lmao, honestly this idea only came to me when I just imagined musical L, walking down the streets covered in blood and gathers attention of concerned citizens gets arrested.

And when they interrogated him and asks for his name he's like "ryuga hideki" and the police doesn't believe him until he asks them to verify his identity through calling to-oh. (Dunno if u can do that but uhhh it happens here) and when the police gave a description of L they're like "Oh yeah that's our student, top ranker ryuga hideki" and the police started to take him seriously now and he makes up a story about waking up and possibly getting kidnapped in a warehouse.

And now he discovers that he doesn't look like the "L" of this world. It's a good thing that the L from this world managed to also get into to-oh and still have his identity hidden. But as he tries to manage surviving alone (without watari) he notices that the date is different from when he died (time travel?) And there were news about Yotsuba and a vice president(?) Higuchi getting cornered by the police and dying from a heart attack (is it kira?).

And eventually, after a week, he concluded that this might have been an alternate universe or a different world where both L and kira still existed. Considering that the task force and light yagami looked different from his world. He's sitting on the floor of the hotel he managed to get to stay in with computers around him and delved further to notice the huge amount of criminals killed. Two of them were criminals he knew of, Thierry Morello a con artist and Merrie Kenwood a thief, both which worked under L. He puts his finger on his lip, thinking. The most concerning yet, was that the L of this world wasn't doing anything.

That made him conclude that either the L of this world was different from him (he wasn't, if the data wasn't wrong the methods he tried were the same to bait kira out) or L of this world was dead.

And he had been replaced by an impostor.

(And now he has to both try find evidence to damn kira and hide from the second L which he thinks is also kira).

[heyheydidjaknow]

Seriously, what makes L so attractive to people? What makes him so attractive to you? Is it really just how fucking insanely intelligent he is? Like by all means he’s not that physically attractive unless you’re into that sickly-Victorian-dying-child-that-occasionally-lacks-eyebrows-in-some-panels thing (no judgement because apparently I myself am entirely into that), and he doesn’t look like he showers daily.

Is it just deadass because he’s that smart? And his unique personality? Because other than that he is most certainly not the most eligible bachelor out there.

I say this with more love towards L than anyone could ever dream of.

This is a totally valid question and I think we should talk about it, actually.

So, first things first, let’s take a second and acknowledge that the bar for romantically viable characters in Death Note is a bit low. We have Matsuda, sure, and Misa is obviously a goddess but, if we’re being honest with ourselves, Matsuda’s a cuck and Misa’s clearly red green colorblind, and unless you want to just completely disregard common sense and want to go with Light “Women are so simple” Yagami, the dating pool is shallow unless you want to add Soichiro or any of the characters outside of that main pool. Between the Wammy kids it’s an easy pick. Within the Kira task force it’s a slightly harder but still relatively easy pick.

Following up on that, he is solidly the second most relatable character in the cast from a personality perspective. He’s funny, sociable, and actually talks about embarrassing things that he’s done. He’s honest most of the time, clearly passionate about what he does (if only in regards to the Kira investigation) and is delightfully petty against someone that, if you like L and his moral ideals, you are going to hate. L, while eccentric, is still a relatively caring person who obviously can and is willing to attach himself to other people (albeit on a surface level) and doesn’t let that get in the way of things that need to be done, which is indicative of his strong work ethic and drive. Also he’s smart which makes the show less frustrating to watch.

Let’s talk brass tax here for a second. Let’s be selfish. Let’s acknowledge that the man has a stable job and an obvious sex drive and romantic desire. Let’s acknowledge the smoothness of “I could actually fall for you.” If you were to get into a permanent relationship with him, would you have to worry about your finances ever again? No, because even if you’re the main provider he is apparently so good with money that at the age of 26 he has enough savings to construct a building on his own and keep safety funds for the people around him. You never have to worry about him cheating, he’s gonna make sure you’re taken care of, and he is actually an active person which is just a wonderful thing to know.

Let’s not kid ourselves; L is hot. He is the alt boy ideal. That is the target demographic. He is so easy to dress and he looks so comfortable in his own skin and one could argue that his looking like that is a stylistic choice and not his just not washing. He is athletic to an extent and has proven his physical strength so you know he’s not just skin and bones under his clothes. He is very doll-like, which is my type and the type of a lot of the people who watch/read death note.

But why do I like L Lawliet? I like him because he’s smart and because he’s fun to write. I like him because he’s relatable and because you know that if he ever left the house long enough to actually get himself a spouse that he would treat them as well as he could manage and love them passionately. He’s fun to talk about and he’s fun to hang around and I’m a sucker for a good voice and that’s all I really need in a man. Is he eccentric? Yes. Do I think that there are aspects of his character which might impede his ability to be a 10/10 boyfriend/husband. Yes. Can I ignore those things because I like him so much? Absolutely.

[multifandoms27-blog]

Kodoku [こどく] | Angst | L x Fem!Reader

Told y’all I’d do it.

こどく (Ko-do-ku) — loneliness; isolation

~*~*~*

Content: So, this isn’t REALLY an L x reader…you’ll figure it out once you start reading :(

Warnings: Suicide, major character death, murder, mentions of murder, heavy depression themes, abandoned child

Notes: This probably wont be the only thing I’ll write to this song, so stay tuned. Kasumi belongs to a friend of mine, whereas Cade and Miriam belong to me.

~*~*~*

(Y/n) glared Light down as Matsuda had shot him. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest — it was finally over. Everything her husband and sons and herself had worked towards, was about to finally come to an end.

Aizawa and Ide moved to stop Matsuda from killing him, but (Y/n) just continued to glare Light down. For so long her husband had his suspicions, ones that (Y/n) shared. But before now, they never had any proof.

Behind them, Mikami panicked and thrust his pen into his stomach, blood spurting out. She didn’t bother to look at the ‘X-Kira.’

“Gevanni, Rester.” (Y/n) called out to the men, almost boredly.

“Right!”

“On it!”

The two men rushed to stop Mikami, as well as Aizawa and Ide, but everyone knew he was a goner.

“Mother?” Near looked up.

“Hand me the notebook.” (Y/n) held her hand out expectantly, not looking away from Light.

Near nodded and handed her the note and a pen. Light used the distraction to get up and stumble, almost drunkenly, out of the warehouse. Matsuda yelled out for him, but once he was out of sight, (Y/n) gave chase.

She didn’t know what Near would do to hold the others back, or if they’d even obey his orders. But all she knew was she was going to get her revenge for her husband and two sons.

Light heard the second pair of footsteps behind him and looked, then screamed out at the sight of (Y/n). He didn’t try to negotiate like usual, she figured it was because he wanted to save energy in case he somehow survived.

Light led her to an abandoned warehouse, he clearly had no idea where he was going.

“Light Yagami.” (Y/n) spoke with a definitive voice.

Light, panicked, looked behind him.

“I once believed we were friends. Or, partially.” She took a step towards him, making him take one back. “But then you took my husband, my sons, and so many other people.”

B flashed in her mind. Kasumi flashed in her mind. Takada, too. Soichiro, even if not directly. She narrowed her eyes even more.

“You’ve ripped everything to shreds. You’ve created chaos, not order. You are no God. You never will be.”

“S-So what’re you going to do?! Kill me?!” Light pants, screaming.

“Maybe. If this notebook is truly the real deal.” She opens it, then looks back at Light. “What do you think of that, Light? This is my perfect victory.”

She wrote his name down in the note, and Light’s eyes widened in realization. She had heard him, at L’s funeral. He could feel his left arm growing numb.

“Thats right,” (Y/n) moved to stand over him, her hair framing her face, the light streaming in from the sunset making her look even more terrifying to the young man.

And with a voice that, to Light, sounded like it had L’s in sync with hers, spoke to him.

“I win.”

Light then could no longer speak. His chest felt tight, like he couldn’t breathe, and it burned. It burned a lot. Tears welled up in his eyes as (Y/n) continued to glare at him. He could’ve sworn that L, Mello and Matt surrounded the (hair color) woman, looking down at him.

(Y/n) watched Light Yagami die slowly. As he was still dying, she sighed and sat next to him on the stairs, bringing her knees up to her chest. She could hear Light’s labored breathing. Her own tears welled up in her eyes.

(Y/n) and Light both went through memories of the task force together four years ago, but each for their respective reasons. Light, because he didn’t know what he did wrong, and maybe felt a twinge of guilt. But a little bit of guilt didn’t stop him in the past. For (Y/n), it was the nostalgia.

When she finally looked back at Light Yagami, he was still, his eyes glazed over and body stiff, just as her husband had been when he died in her arms. Clenching her eyes shut to keep from crying, she rested her chin on her knees.

“Did you see that, L…? Mello, Matt…?” She sobbed into her knees. “We won. We finally…fucking won…”

(Y/n), now feeling more alone than ever, sobbed harshly. Yes, the case was done. She’d gotten her revenge. But now she felt strangely…empty. She wont be able to share the fruits of her victory with those she lost.

She didn’t know how long she sobbed and cried out for, but it was night by the time Aizawa had put a hand on her shoulder and told her it was time to leave.

“Will you be alright, (Y/n)-chan?” Matsuda asked softly, watching the paramedics take Light’s body away.

“…maybe one day.” (Y/n) followed Matsuda’s line of sight.

Matsuda and (Y/n) shared a long hug and many crying sessions that night. Even with Matsuda, Near, Rester, Gevanni, Linder, Ide, Aizawa and Mogi, she felt alone.

When she crawled into bed that night, it was like she had lost L all over again. The pain jabbed and tore through her heart like a knife— no, a sword. It was so painful, and (Y/n) wondered for a moment if thats what Light had felt before dying.

~*~*~*

In the days following the solving of the Kira case; Misa Amane had killed herself, Mogi transferred to work in the United States, while Aizawa, Ide and Matsuda stayed as policemen in Japan. Near and (Y/n) went back to Wammy’s house in England, where they held Mello’s and Matt’s funerals. Rester, Gevanni and Linder stayed in the United States to help Mogi.

They had been buried next to L. It was a rough day for everyone.

(Y/n) now leaned against the doorframe of Matt and Mello’s old room. It was left exactly how it was before they ran away. Furniture gathering layers of dust, old consoles and games Matt was unable to take with him were left behind, the TV needed a good dusting, and the curtains hadn’t been opened in forever.

Above the nightstand, which was situated between their beds, (Y/n) saw an old photo of all of them together as a family. L in his weird sitting position with Near and his favorite Iron Man toy in his lap, (Y/n) standing next to him while Mello and Matt stand in front of her. They all seemed really happy.

She was supposed to go through their initial stuff and decide what to do with it. Roger would have done it himself, but he “wouldn’t want to intrude, ma’am.”

She started with their nightstand. That would be the least painful, right? Their dressers were still hastily open, some old clothing hanging over the edges. (Y/n) pulled one of the drawers out. A lot of it was papers filled with studies, mainly Mello’s more than Matt’s.

(Y/n) chuckled. “I forgot that Matt was only studying hard until becoming L’s successor was optional…”

She couldn’t remember how many times she’d come into the room to tell Matt to turn his games off, and that it was late. Oh, what she wouldn’t give to do that one last time.

Feeling the tears prick her eyes again, she continued. The first drawer held nothing but scraps of paper that will never be used again. The second drawer however, was filled with drawings Matt and Mello did when they were kids.

Picking up the first one carefully, (Y/n) smiled softly at the image. It was, from left to right; L, (Y/n), Mello, Matt and Near. Everyone was labelled.

That was it. Drawings upon drawings of the family, when Matt and Mello were kids. (Y/n) kept a hand to her mouth as she sobbed.

“Mom…?” Near spoke softly. “Roger said you’d be in here…”

“Oh, Near, honey…” She sniffled and rubbed the tears from her eyes.

Near wordlessly moved forward and hugged her. He had been hurting, too, he just didn’t know how to show it. He let his mom sob into his little frame, making him want to cry. But, he held himself back and didn’t.

“I came to get you because we have someone new today…” Near whispered. “He’s outside with his mom. She wants to speak with you directly.”

(Y/n) sniffled and nodded, pulling away. “Okay, um…”

Near stands with her, keeping a hand comfortingly on her back, looking at her with concern.

“Thank you, Near. C’mon, let’s go see what’s happening outside.” She threw on a smile, one that Near didn’t like, but he followed her anyway.

Outside, a woman was waiting with a small boy. The woman was crouched at her sons height, talking to him. (Y/n) remembered when that was her with her own sons.

“Hello, you said you wanted to speak with me directly, yes?”

The woman looked up, then stood. “Yes. I’m Miriam, pleased to meet you.”

“And what brings you by today?” (Y/n) threw Miriam and the boy a sweet smile, and was a bit taken aback at how much the boy looked like Mello.

“May we talk, mother to mother?”

(Y/n) nodded and shuffled away from Near and the boy with Miriam. The woman finally broke and began to cry.

“I can’t…I thought I could be like you, but I don’t know how you do it…”

“Ma’am, calm down. It’s going to be okay. Your son will be safe here.” (Y/n) wanted nothing more than to cry with her.

“No, I know. My um…boyfriend of sorts grew up here. He was actually um…” she sniffled. “one of your sons.”

(Y/n) was thrown back a little. She glanced at the boy, who was busy looking at Near’s robot toy.

“Mello…?”

“Mhm.” Miriam nodded. “We were in the same mafia group…listen, I know you don’t know me but Mello talked about you in such a good light…I can’t keep Cade in an environment like that…”

She looked back at Miriam at the mention of the boy’s name. She clenched her jaw and then nodded. “Yeah, yeah no problem. We’ll take him.”

Miriam smiles sadly. “Oh, oh thank you, (Y/n).”

She nods and glances at the ground, then looks back at Cade. Miriam takes that as a sign to hug the older woman, which she hesitantly returns. Cade turned to look at the two of them, the dirty blonde boy and the (hair color) woman making eye contact.

Cade was like his father. With one look, he understood everything. Even with Cade here, as a new child to raise with the others, everything still felt so empty. Nothing could bring her family back. Near and Cade were all she had left.

Although, when Cade was waving goodbye to Miriam, and then turned to (Y/n) with tears in his eyes, a look Near recognized, she realized she wasn’t the only one feeling alone. All three of them did, no matter the circumstances.

(Y/n) pulled both Cade and Near into a hug. Maybe, if nothing else, they could all be alone together.

[queersturbate]

my friend and I were talking about this but I don't think people talk about the ending credits of death note enough. Light was dying, by himself, like a dog, in an abandoned building, just bleeding out after being caught and exposed as Kira. and as he was fading away, knowing that he just lost, he hallucinated L standing in front of him. and he showed comfort and acceptance on his face as they watched each other. canonically, L had been dead for years. he wasn't the one to expose him, he shouldn't even be in Lights head anymore, should have just been another obstacle that he passed and forgotten about after he died, but as he laid dying, he hallucinated L standing with him, with obvious comfort on his face. He could have hallucinated Soichiro or his mom or sister or misa or even near as a little "fuck you, you beat me" moment but ??? he saw L. it was a very "i lost, too, but we'll see each other again" moment

[13eyond13]

It’s fascinating how bleak Death Note is, even as it saddens me. B tries to beat L, fails, then is killed by Kira. Then it’s Kira vs L, and you wonder who will win, but in the end no one wins—L dies first, Light dies in the end, and everyone involved has their life ruined, even innocent people like Naomi. Mello swears he’ll surpass L and Near, but ends up dying, and Matt dies as well. Near manages to survive, but life doesn’t seem that great for the new L in the A-Kira one-shot. Misa commits suicide, Mikami commits suicide(?), Takada commits suicide (controlled, but still). Soichiro dies, Sayu is kidnapped and traumatized, and Sachiko is left to deal with all that. Even the Task Force... I mean, excited puppy Matsuda was pushed to his breaking point and shot Light who he once admired. Rem, a Shinigami, ended up dying thanks to Light’s schemes. And you know that song, Requiem, from the musical? People think it’s about Light only, but I think it applies to a lot of characters. “Sleep now/Here among your choices/Then drift away/Here now, how the world rejoices/Shades of grey/Gone, who was right or wrong/Who was weak or strong/Nothing left to learn/[...]/Tales full of fleeting glories.” Basically: where did you wits battle/war of geniuses got you? It doesn’t matter who is more intelligent because everyone lost. Except Ryuk. Ryuk is like, “RIP to y’all, but I’m different.” He got his entertainment from these funny humans, lmao.

DN is much better this way than if they simply let L win or Light win, imo. The way they end everything with Death Note rules to make the grim truth inescapable? Chills.

Omg hahaha once you lay it all out like that it really is amazingly bleak isn't it 😅 And I think the only reason I can still stomach it is because it's also slyly self-aware and often silly and full of interesting dramatic irony, and never really trying to force you to sympathize with any of the more egotistical and ambitious characters too hard. Most Battle Royale / "every man for himself" type things often get too edgy or gory for me, or don't have complex enough characters or logical enough rules to keep me emotionally invested in them for long. But this one is definitely an exception. And I think it's interesting how incredibly versatile this series is in terms of tone and genre and media it can be successfully adapted to and so on. I'm sure that adds to the fandom's impressive ability to sustain itself

[mikami]

This was kind of a while ago by now, but when you answered that one ask about 17/18 yo Light if he were in the Yellow Box, you finished with something like "his heart wasn't in it because his father was gone" (paraphrasing ofc). Did you mean he actually missed his dad, or that his father's obsessive commitment to catching Kira made the "game" more fun after L was gone? (part 1)

(part 2) Of course you might have meant something else entirely and I just didn't pick up on it. Personally I don't think he gave a s*** about Soichiro, his interaction with Matsuda in the warehouse is enough to completely convince me of that. But he also didn't think Soichiro was very smart, so it's not like being Kira would be easier and therefore less "fun" after he died (plus, there was also Near). ok now I'm done :)

Oh I disagree with you there entirely - Light’s father is the core of his entire morality and not being able to obtain his approval before his death is THE crushing low point of Light’s entire life.

I have a different read on the finale interaction with Matsuda as well - to me it cements just how much Soichiro meant to Light.

I understand where your read of these lines comes from, but I think that it disregards context from the rest of the manga to look at this and assume it means Light doesn’t care.

What Light is doing here is outlining a good chunk of his motivation to become Kira in the first place - Light idolized his father. It was Light’s life dream to follow in his father’s career footsteps. The one thing he can’t stand to be called is ‘evil’ because his father will never bow to evil. His father’s morality is ingrained in his every thought and he spends a lifetime trying to live up to it. 

The fact that Soichiro is so good and admirable and STILL the world doesn’t appreciate him doesn’t make Light dislike his father - it makes him dislike the world. That is why he sees the world as rotten to begin with!

So why does Light refuse to even call him dad here? Because Soichiro’s death crushed him on every level.

In his dying words Soichiro confirms that a) despite literally mock executing Light to prove his innocence he still doubted him and that b) he still has not changed his mind about Kira. Light’s whole idea is that Kira’s actions are wrong NOW, but once the world changes, perception of what wrong even means will change - Light wanted his family to come around. Soichiro’s death takes this away.

Light never acts the same after Soichiro’s death. It makes him colder, more openly cynical, and avoid the people he loves the most (his mom and sister). He emotionally distanced himself from his father to this degree not because he didn’t care but because he cared too much and he’s trying to bury that hurt deep deep down.

In my opinion, Light’s relationship with his father is THE singular most important relationship Light has in all of canon - no other character comes even close to holding a candle to it.

I’ve written about it before here with more evidence from the manga as a whole!

[t4tlawlight]

YOU'RE AN AVENGER, A DEATH ANGEL. YOU KILL PEOPLE WHO ASK FOR IT, WHO DESERVE TO DIE. YOU'RE A WATCHDOG, A PROTECTOR OF THINGS DECENT. YOUR COMFORTS ARE SACRIFICED FOR EFFICIENCY -- YOU CAN'T DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE WITH PEOPLE MOANING AND CLINGING TO YOU, YOU CAN'T STRIKE WITH POSSESSIONS WEIGHING YOU DOWN. YOU HAVE A CLEAR HEAD AND NO REGRETS. YOU CAN TAKE OUT ANYONE BECAUSE YOU'RE STRIPPED DOWN AND YOU DON'T DEPEND ON OR TRUST A SOUL. YOU ARE EFFECTIVE BECAUSE YOU DON'T LOVE ANYBODY OR ANYTHING. YOU'RE A ONE- MAN FORCE, THE PERFECT INSTRUMENT OF DESTINY.

– "INFLAMMATORY ESSAYS 5" by Jenny Holzer

(this is a companion piece to Love and Belonging, my early drama light analysis! [LINK] i heavily recommend reading it before continuing this analysis, as i reference events and ideas explained in that post.)

in my previous analysis of drama light, i focused on the events that led him to become the man we see in the beginning of the drama: a gentle, kind man who is underachieving but still brilliant, who takes a maternal role in his household after the death of his mother. This is all crucial to understanding Light’s character in the drama and how the events leading up to him becoming Kira change in line with his altered characterization, but that analysis only barely skimmed the surface of Light’s character development throughout the drama, and especially after L’s death.

the drama fandom--including me!--is somewhat guilty of making blanket statements about drama light’s morality as opposed to his manga counterpart, that drama light is kinder and gentler in comparison to manga light. this may be true early on, but i would argue that as the series progresses, drama light willingly and deliberately throws away his love and humanity just as much--if not more!--than his manga counterpart.

to understand what i mean it’s important to compare light’s relationship with his father between the adaptations.

in the manga, light grows up idolizing his father, loving and admiring him and wanting to follow in his footsteps as a police officer. his morality that leads to him ultimately becoming Kira comes from Soichiro, as does his dissatisfaction with the world as he sees his father work himself to the bone trying to eradicate crime that seems to never end.

there’s a lot more that can be said about the nature of their relationship and about how Light desperately seeks his father’s approval, but instead of typing out an entire analysis i’ll link you to this post by tumblr user mikami [LINK], which is a very good analysis of the two of them in the manga.

conversely, in the drama Light begins much the same, but Soichiro choosing to chase a criminal instead of being by his wife’s deathbed--leaving his children to witness their mother’s passing alone--strains Light’s relationship with him. Light has much of the same morals and worldview as manga Light, but now believes that his father’s morality is more or less worthless, since he had to give up his family to pursue justice.

Light: When my mother died when I was a kid, my father was off chasing a criminal… I thought my father’s form of justice couldn’t be worth much, if he had to sacrifice even his family to see it through.

– Episode 7

however, it’s important to note that while Light is cold with his father and resents his occupation, that does not mean that Light does not still love and idolize his father. he wants his father’s love and support, and he cares as deeply for him as does his manga counterpart. in fact, drama light only becomes kira out of a desire to protect his father--after his first, accidental murder, he throws away the Death Note and tries to forget about it. however, his father is taken hostage by a criminal who intends on seeking revenge for Soichiro putting him in jail years ago, and Light is forced to retrieve the note and write the criminal’s name to protect his father.

[photo: a zoomed in shot of the Death Note. Light is writing the name “Otoharada Kuro” in Japanese. the penmanship is shaky and nearly illegible from how hard Light’s hand is trembling.]

– Episode 1

Light is literally shaking with terror as he writes the name of the man about to kill his father.

and this is not something Light does lightly--after he saves his father and it’s announced that Otoharada is dead, Light is absolutely stricken with guilt and horror for murdering two people, including the man who was about to kill his father. he saved his father’s life at the price of another, because he loves his father--and his entire family--very deeply.

it’s also worth noting a slight difference between the manga and the drama; after the mock execution, drama Soichiro admits that he believed Light could be guilty and was prepared to die. Light--who at this point has no memory of being Kira and thus completely believes himself to be wrongly accused--does not blame his father for not trusting him. Light, who desperately wants his father’s approval, does not blame him in the slightest: instead, the subject of his anger is Kira himself for putting Soichiro in this position and making Soichiro suffer.

Light: I… I hate Kira. Kira, who made you suffer this way… I hate him so much. Soichiro: Light… Light: Please catch him. I believe that you can catch Kira, Dad.

[photo: Light and Soichiro in an abandoned parking garage. the two of them are crouching beside Soichiro’s car. Soichiro is hugging Light, who weakly raises his hands to hold his father in return.]

– Episode 6

the two of them embrace and weep before collecting themselves and returning to Countermeasures.

by this point in the story, it’s obvious that both versions of Light love Soichiro very much. Light is creating his “new world” for the good of humanity but also for the people he loves the most--his family.

later, the emotional death of manga Light comes after the passing of his father, which he never wanted nor planned for. he never wanted Soichiro to be in a position to get hurt and he is never, ever the same after Soichiro's death, especially because he never gains his father’s approval for his actions as Kira--in fact, Soichiro leaves him with an outright rejection of Kira entirely.

[panel 1: a close up of Soichiro’s eye. he looks like he’s in pain. the speech bubble above his head reads, “I still have the eyes. And according to that Shinigami… Ryuk, I can’t see the lifespan of someone who owns a notebook.

panel 2: Light is standing above his father’s prone body. Matsuda stands behind him, bandages on his face and arms. Soichiro continues, “Light, you’re not Kira… I’m so glad…” Light looks shocked in response, a speech bubble above his head reading only “!” Matsuda says, “O-of course he isn’t! You were still worried about that?"]

the fact that Light can never gain that approval leads to him becoming incredibly dissatisfied and simply going through the motions--it’s what leads to him treating other people like cogs in a machine that will listen to him without any free will of their own, which is what makes him not foresee that Mikami might take action of his own accord. this is how Light gets caught in the end.

in the drama, however, Light experiences more than just his father’s rejection. Soichiro confronts Light directly about being Kira, catching him in the act. this is, of course, Light’s worst case scenario--he does virtually everything he can to lie his way out of it, to get his father back on his side, but fails. Soichiro acknowledges the fact that it was his fault that Light turned out this way, and also that he failed to notice that Light was suffering up until now--and then begs Light to turn himself in, in a scene that echoes L’s confrontation with Light from a couple of episodes prior.

when Light refuses, Soichiro begins to write his own name in the book.

Light: No way. Dad… Stop it. Dad! Stop it! Dad! Soichiro: There’s a struggle going on in your soul right now, isn’t there? That’s what it means to take someone’s life. That’s the weight of a human life. Do you understand, Light? Light: If this suffering is the real thing, I really can’t forgive criminals. I realized it, Dad. Even someone like me… There’s something even I can do to serve the world. Soichiro: How does killing people serve the world?! Light: I’ve sacrificed a lot of things, too! You of all people must understand how I feel! We’re working for the same thing. To protect the peace for everyone. With that notebook, I can create a world without crime! I’m just like you! Soichiro: You’re wrong. Open your eyes, Light. Come back, Light.

– Episode 10

with this ultimate rejection of Light’s actions, Soichiro finishes writing his name and Light allows him to do so. it isn’t as though Light couldn’t have stopped him if he really wanted to, either; on one level, turning himself into the police as Soichiro requested would have saved his father. on another, we see him rip the Death Note from Soichiro’s dying hands moments later as his father attempts to burn the book. Light is perfectly capable of saving the book and only acts when the Note is in danger, not his beloved family member.

of course, we never see manga Light exactly in this position, either, and I can’t say that I think that manga Light would have turned himself in or physically ripped the Note from Soichiro’s hands. both Lights did virtually everything they could to never be in a situation where they had to choose between the safety of their family members and being Kira, and I doubt manga Light would have done well emotionally with Soichiro outright rejecting him, his actions, and his ideology.

however, their actions and behavior immediately after Soichiro’s death is extremely telling. when manga Light is rejected by his father, who died as a result of a plan gone awry, he is completely devastated.

[photo: a panel of Light Yagami screaming over his father’s body. tears are running down his face, and he yells, “Dad! Dad! Don’t you die, damn it!”]

he sheds tears--which are rare for manga Light--and he mourns over his father’s dead body for quite some time. as i said previously, he is never the same man again after his father’s death.

drama Light sheds tears as Soichiro writes his name and is clearly upset by his passing, but his mourning period is immediately interrupted by desperation to get the Note back. he spends Soichiro’s last moments wrestling with him for the Note, and once his father collapses he takes the note, wild-eyed, and holds it to his chest protectively. in this instant, he cares more about the safety of the book than his dead parent--because he had just chosen the notebook, and being Kira, over his father.

after Soichiro’s funeral, Light thinks this:

Light [internally]: Dad really did open my eyes. If I am to become a God, sacrifices are inevitable. No matter who it is that pursues Kira, I will erase them.

– Episode 10

this is Light implicitly saying that sacrificing his family members--sacrificing Soichiro, the man he began killing in order to save--is inevitable if they oppose Kira. of course, this is very similar to the way that manga Light distances himself from Soichiro after Soichiro’s death, to save him from the hurting that it caused him.

[photo: a panel of Light Yagami’s face, zoomed in close so we can only see one eye, his nose, and most of his mouth. He is scowling, most of his eye cast in shadow, and he’s sweating and panting. He asks, “Dad? Are you talking about Soichiro Yagami?”]

of course, all of this begs the question of how drama Light--who began a sweet, gentle boy who was more or less coerced into using the Death Note to begin with--got to a place that even manga Light didn’t have the chance to get to, where he was more willing to save the Death Note than his own father. it’s important to consider another relationship that drama Light has that’s much different from manga Light’s--his relationship to L.

manga light respects L's intelligence and sees him as an equal, as entertainment at times, but he doesn’t like him. not even during yotsuba arc, where they’re ostensibly on the same side--in fact, i would say yotsuba Light has more reason to dislike L, seeing as though he believes L to be falsely accusing him and having tortured him for virtually no reason. they're not actually friends--it’s a manipulation tactic. moreover, L sees him the same way. they were not friends and they both intended on killing each other until the bitter end.

by comparison, drama light and L's relationship starts that way--with the two of them wanting to kill each other, with a pretense of friendship that is actually an excuse to get close to each other to try and test for weaknesses--but the difference is that they, well, fall for their own bullshit. during yotsuba arc, Light’s memories are rewritten in such a way that he believes that L and light are genuinely on friendly terms, and L finds himself over the course of the arc going from respecting Light’s talents and thinking him as something interesting to genuinely wanting him to not be Kira and seeing him as a friend.

if you want to know more about L’s thought processes during the series and specifically the blue scene I recommend reading my analysis about him [LINK] but what is important to note is that L does not want to kill Light anymore by the time episode 8 rolls around. like Soichiro later will, he attempts to convince Light to confess--with the intention, we later find out, to potentially give him a way out. of course, Light doesn’t understand this and believes, for the moment, that it’s a fight to the death--so he writes L’s name in (what he believes to be) the Death Note.

this is intrinsically different from the way Light kills L in the manga. manga Light convinces someone else to do the dirty work and he is absolutely gleeful when L dies, gloating over his dying body--but up until this point L has made manga Light’s life an absolute hassle and expressed time and time again that he intends on executing Kira, who he believes to be Light. L wants to kill him, and they are not friends. while drama Light also believes it’s a “me-or-him” situation, he cannot deny that he actually likes L, that he wanted to be friends with him--he wanted, like Soichiro, for L to accept him and to be a part of the world Kira would create.

[photo: Light, cast in blue light, is bent over double. we’re looking at his face from below, from L’s point of view on the floor. his face is contorted with grief, face wet with tears and spit. He says, “I’d have wanted to be your friend forever.”]

– Episode 8

these are what Light believes to be his last words to L, so he has no reason to lie. he’s weeping as he says it, seeming absolutely heartbroken. this is the first time that Light kills--or attempts to kill--someone he cares about, and it’s the moment he decides to throw his humanity away. if he hadn’t cared so deeply for L before deciding to kill him, I don’t think the scene with Soichiro would have played out quite the same. Light even says it himself right before he writes L’s name:

Light: I can’t afford to lose to you. I’m creating a perfect world, without crime. To see that happen, I… L: Light… Light: I… I’ve decided there’s nothing I won’t do!

– Episode 8

these words are immediately followed by Light attempting to kill L. this is the fundamental moment that Light throws away his humanity, literally deciding that he would do anything for his new world, including killing his friends if they stand in his way. this culminates in him letting his father die and ripping the Note from his hands. he believes that the ends justify the means and that this is the only option he has.

it’s important to note that it isn’t that Light stopped loving his father, or stopped liking L--it isn’t that he lacks guilt over their deaths. it’s exactly the opposite. while their deaths--and the deaths of the Countermeasures team that he planned to take place, as well as the FBI and countless other people--are a necessary evil in order to make the world a better place, Light has to absolutely jump through hoops to justify it to himself and compartmentalize the guilt. as I said earlier, Light saying that Soichiro’s death was inevitable is a way to distance himself from the pain and guilt and rejection he feels, but as he’s dying that guilt cracks back open wide. when he sees that the Death Note is on fire, he panics and begins crawling towards it.

Light: Not yet. I can still do more. If I give up now… What was it all for?

– Episode 11

this is immediately followed by a flashback to Soichiro’s death, where Soichiro questions him about how killing people serves the world--after he crawls a little further, he flashes back again to L, recalling L’s desire to be friends with him.

these flashbacks go to show that Light feels a deep and profound guilt for killing both of them. he’s justified and rationalized it to himself as being for the good of the world--he chose being Kira over both of their lives. however, this means that if Kira fails, if he dies and the world goes right back to the way it was, then all of it was for nothing. he gets himself into a situation where he has to keep killing and killing people he cares about because if he stops then it means that all of it was for nothing.

it’s honestly an incredibly sad situation, that someone so full of kindness would become ultimately cold-hearted in an effort to cope with guilt.